Broad Ideas with Rachel Bilson & Olivia Allen - Rebecca Gayheart Dane on The Power of Showing Up

Episode Date: November 17, 2025

Rachel and Olivia sit down with Rebecca Gayheart Dane to talk about her experience with plastic surgery, raising daughters in a social-media world, and what it really means to show up for both yourself and the people you love.Watch the video of this episode here!Like the show? Rate Broad Ideas 5-Stars on Apple Podcasts and SpotifyAdvertise on Broad Ideas via Gumball.fm See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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to join us on this journey as we take a little ride. We'll talk about dogs and kids and things. We'll talk about chicks and tampon strings. We'll talk about boys that'll make you cry. We'll talk about death because people die. Welcome to broad ideas. I have just, I mean, growing up everything, just looking at her face and her hair and just her as a person, you know, really left a mark. Totally. Rebecca Gayheart Dane is with us today.

And it's so, so excited that she came to sit with us and chat. Let's go. Yeah, it's the craziest thing. Jessica and I have known each other since we were four years old. And we're from this tiny little town in the Appalachian Mountains in eastern Kentucky. My dad's a coal miner. No. Yep.

And we were best friends from kindergarten until we both left. And she met Jason Diamond in her residency. And because he wanted to be a plastic. they moved to California. So I have my one, my childhood best friend. That is crazy. So they're like my family.

And so yes, he did it. So, Jessica is one of Alana's best friends. They've been friends from the age. Their boys grew up together. Yeah, a lot of 20-something years. Yeah, and I know Alana from forever. She had the babies.

Yeah. And they're like, yeah. Teen teens. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well, Ryder is, Georgie. age, I think, right?

Ryder is... One is Billy's age and one is Georgie's age. I don't know how old they are anymore. I've lost track. I think maybe Ryder's 14. Yeah. George's 13 and then one is 17. Yeah, they're old.

I mean, I grew up with a long. I've known her since I was nine. Oh, wow. So are you guys besties? Yeah, I've been... She's like a sister cousin. That's amazing. You know, absolute family members.

Oh, that's so nice. That's how Jessica is for me. She said to me, because I texted on, I said, don't you know Rebecca? And she goes, yeah, she's. Yeah. To Jessica, like us. They grew up together. They've known each other their whole lives.

I was like, got it. Are we recording? Oh, okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So Jason Diamond, and I'm very open about it because I feel that we have to be because... I like that. Yeah, it's like, why are we trying to pretend like we aren't aging? Aren't aging.

And also, if we can... do something to look better. Why are we trying to say we're not doing that? I don't know. I feel like we just have to say it and normalize it. And for me, I've had like a rough couple of years and I was starting to, the gravity really hit like two years ago, like 52. I was like, wow, this is bad. So I had one eye that was just saggy and in photos. It looked close. One looked open. One looked closed. And I was like, I hate this. And it was bothering me. And so, and Jason, of course, is like, yeah, you need to get that fixed. And he's like, and while you're at it, you need to do this, this, this, this, and this and this.

So I did it. I did it in July, the end of July. So how many weeks out of my, I'm like, I'm supposed to be keeping count. I don't know. I did it like July 24th, I think. Oh, my gosh. 25th, something like that. And it's October.

So it's been a couple of months. And I did lower. Oh. So. Oh. So you don't have a, so the neck. What is it? What do they do?

It's called a mini. Okay. Take us through it. I know. I think, yeah. Well, I think, yeah. Well, here is. This is just that.

It's an upper. Upper. Yes, thank you. And I mean, as you can see, there's no, the scars are gone. Yeah. I mean, I think it's still all, you know, settling. But yeah, it's so much better. But you can't really see because it's swollen today.

I was really mad that. No. It doesn't happen. You can't even. You got an allergy to you just. I don't know. I think maybe a cat hair got in, but all I did was my eye was itching and then I went like this a few times and then it went. Wow. And then this one just a little bit, but this one was like clothes. And I was like, oh my God, I'm going to have to wear sunglasses. No, you look good. So I had the upper left and then I had the lower mini lift. Okay. So they don't touch anything else. It's just like a neck pull or? It's like. this. Okay. Yeah. So all that, you know, what is, you would never know. The jowls and the this. It just does that. Looks beautiful. And how like invasive is it the recovery? Like is it intense or is it? I mean, for me, I'd never had a surgery. So in life. No, ever. Never. I'd never had a surgery. So I was my first one. So I did it. And for me, it was like a little intense just because I'd never. done a surgery of any kind. But I will say Jason is just, he's the guy who won't make you

look crazy. Like, you know what I mean? He's just got like a very soft touch. He wants everyone just to look like themselves a bit better. He only does faces. Like, he's a facial plastic surgeon. He doesn't do your boobs or your hips or your butt or your whatever or Mommy makeovers or any of that kind of stuff. He does your face. So he is very focused on that. And so I, you know, I know them. They're like my family. And I felt very comfortable. Yeah. Yeah. And I did it. The tricky part was my daughters. I was going to ask. Yeah. So, you know, obviously I was honest without divulging everything. But I was home recovering. So they saw. And they went through it with me. And I just explained to them. I was like, listen, this is possibly going to make me feel better about myself. And I think that's

okay. And I was like, I wouldn't do anything that I thought was dangerous or egregious. You know, this is something that's going to make me feel better. And my youngest gave me a hard time. My oldest did not. But I think my youngest daughter was just nervous. Like, I went through that with my mom. Oh, you did? Yeah. Okay. And it was nerve wracking. Like, I remember seeing her afterwards and And like, why did you? What did your mom get done? My mom got like a little bit of eye. This was like a long time ago.

So it was probably very different. Yeah, but it was scary as a young girl. I was like, but would you ever do it? I think once I'm like at a point where I would, I don't have anything against it at all. And in fact, like from everything going on, I feel like the toxicity of like Botox. whatever that people are doing that in a lot of ways the surgery seems less toxic for you than doing all of that, right? It was that.

And also, so I'd never done filler or I'd done Botox, but I'd never done filler or other things. And I don't like needles. Yeah. Yeah. I'm also a big wuss. I don't like the way it looks on people, to be honest. I don't like the way the filler looks in the face. I think the filler is just bad jazz.

It's just bad for everyone. And they don't know it when they start. And then I think they lose their ability to see what they. And then it just becomes, I don't know. I'm not a fan of it. Yeah. Some people are. I'm not.

It's all personal, you know, preference. But for me, I liked the idea of just looking a little less tired, not having that one droopy eye that drove me insane. Like I would literally like pull the skin out and be like, it's this. I want this. Like, I really was hyper-focused on it. And I like the idea of just doing it and being done and then not having to. And whatever it is, like, it didn't change.

Like, a lot of people don't even know that I've done anything. No. I would have had no idea. That's what I was going to say. I wonder, though, too, this is what happens, I think, that it's not always the case with people. But I went on my Instagram and did a whole thing and said, I did this because I didn't want. I have so much respect for that.

People to say, like, you know, or people to think at 54 years old, you don't have those jowls because you do. And the neck looks like you're, yeah. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? Like, that's all normal. And right. Like, you can keep. keep it and it's great because some people like age so beautifully without doing anything. Yeah. I think it's just about how you feel. It's definitely personal, you know?

Yeah. For sure. Yeah. It's like how you feel. And, you know, I think because I've been in this business for so long and, you know, yeah, it was important for me to look and feel a little better. I have a question on that because I do believe two things can exist at once. I think that you can not like something about yourself physically and still have a tremendous

amount of self-love. I don't think they're mutually exclusive. I don't either. And I think a lot of people put the narrative like, oh, if you're going to do something like that, you don't love yourself or you're not accepting yourself. I'm like, I don't think that's true. I think that you can very much love yourself and if something is accessible to you that you want to change, that doesn't mean you don't have high self-esteem. It doesn't mean that you don't love. I think that there's been like a this camp or that camp. And I actually don't think it's a fair narrative. It's not.

And it's not real. And it's also bullshit. Because even when someone ages gracefully, if we sit them down and they say, I love my saggy boobs and I love my pooch and I love my gray hair and I love my wrinkles. Do you think it's true? Like, do you really think it's true? I think that as we get older, we like care less. So I do think some people are just like, yeah, I'm okay with all of this. But I think they all, every woman has moments where they're not okay with it too. But that's what you're saying is that both things can be true. Listen, someone told me, many, many, many,

many, many, many, many, many years ago when I was first starting out and I was very young and I modeled for like a few years before I fell into acting. And someone said I had cancels or thankles. And to this day, I still have to like reset my head before I wear a short skirt or shorts. Yeah. Like you. It's just that one comment. That one comment and that just stuck with me, you know. And I don't think I actually have it. But sometimes. Someone said it to me. Right. And so that's what sticks. What do you always say? How many positives to erase a negative? Ten positives to counteract one negative thought. And also our brain is trained to find the negative to keep us out of danger. And so that's what the brain is actually looking for is ways to navigate in which it can stay safe.

And that's why we as human beings pick the negative and harp on it is because, our brains are actually doing what they're supposed to do. And so now with the consciousness that we know that the brain is doing that, we get to go in and go, hold on. Okay, I'm having this thought. Let me counteract it with X amount of positive thoughts. We have to nudge our brain in the direction. Right. We want it to go.

Right. Right. Yeah. I think that's true. I think that's true. But I think that, like I, especially right now, wake up in the morning and I have to do a little adjustment. And I have to, you know, spout out like the things I'm grateful for that are super obvious,

like my health, my daughters, you know, my, like, you know, the obvious things. And I start that way and then throughout the day I can find other things that I'm grateful for. And so that it doesn't turn negative. But it's an adjustment, you know? And then sometimes in the middle of the day I have to do another. adjustment because so many other things went sideways. And so I think it is very much how we speak to ourselves and how we manage our thoughts and how we... Yeah. Yeah. And having teenagers, what's so sad is that, and I think we are all, I think all women are conditioned to sort of judge ourselves so unfairly

from the get-go, okay, from every generation. Women have just been... a program to judge ourselves so harshly. But now it's wild. It's just constant because of social media and online content and even Pinterest. Like you think Pinterest is a safe place for your kids to get creative and do a thing. No, no, no, one wrong thing. And then look what comes up on their for you, Paige. Really? Oh, yeah, about, you know, skinny thighs and your hair's not thick enough. And, I mean, the things that I hear coming out of the mouths of my daughters and their friends,

it's incredibly sad. And so I'm always trying to combat that. But part of it, I think, is, like, the natural thing that girls go through. Yeah. But most of it is given to them on purpose. on purpose through these algorithms, through these apps. So they can tell you something at the end? Yeah.

And I, like, I really wanted TikTok to go away. And I know that that is a lot of people's livelihood. And I didn't want people to lose their livelihoods, obviously, and the people who made that their careers. I just wish, you know, I did, it's impossible to keep your kids off of it. Because as my daughters would say, you're going to make us. the weird kids who don't know a pop culture reference or doesn't know, you know, whatever. And so finding the balance is really difficult, really difficult.

But I feel sad for my kids because they just are fed negativity without them even knowing it. It scares me so much. And knowing, the other thing is, knowing where all their friends are all the time. is bad for you. It's because they know every time they're not invited. Included. That's horrible. Every time they're not included.

Oh my God. And I keep saying, you guys, it's okay. They're still your friends. Maybe this was a special date with so-and-so. But they see it happening. And there's like, but we just spoke. And they didn't say they were with so-and-so. And they're at the mall.

And they didn't, I was right by the mall. And they could have. And I'm like, listen, you can't. You can't, yeah, and it's awful. Horrible because I always like, you know, if I don't get invited to something, I'm like a little hurt. Yeah, of course, everyone. I just want to be. Say, of course, I'm not going to go.

That's what I always say is like even, and I don't go to so many things, but I still want to be invited. Of course. You want to be invited. No, it's hurt. I felt left out with people I'm not even friends with recently. I saw something like, why isn't I at that? And I'm like, I would have never, I don't even know any of them. Yeah. Right.

Right. So imagine you're a teenager. teenager and going through that. And your frontal lobes not even developed. It's really, really. We're still at the age where, like, a lot of my daughter's friends, they don't have phones yet. Right. Which is awesome and great and amazing. And I tell my daughter all the time when the day comes, it's not going to be a phone that has apps, like a dumb phone, right? Like just texting. And I say that. And I know it gets hard. Listen, I tried that, by the way. Yeah. I started with flip phones. Yes. Yes. And they were trying to do the T1, T9 texting or whatever. And. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It worked a little bit for a minute. But ultimately, then you see that your friend is being left out because they don't have a phone and there's group chats and they make the plans there because starting at around age 13, they start making their own plans. You know, the kids and then the moms are secondary. Right. You know, like the kids make the plans. A kid will say it to a mom and then the mom would be like, hey, is this a real plan or is this not? So your kid would get left out. Right.

And it's just so tricky. It's so tricky. I don't know what the answer is. I don't. It's scary. I don't think anyone does. It's really scary. This is uncharted territory.

Yeah. And it sucks that our kids are the guinea pigs of it all, you know. I know. I know. And my goddaughters who are 20. Oh my God. How old are they? They're like 21 and 20.

No. Okay. Marley is 20. and Lola is 22. They are not like this. They just escaped it. Like they had a different experience. And they're so lucky, you know, because they are out in nature making plans with their friends.

They don't take pictures of everything. That's another thing. Sometimes kids will be invited to go somewhere, but they won't go because they're like, I have a pimple today and I don't look good and someone's going to take pictures. And they'll post it on their thing. And I'm like, what? Oh, my God. You're avoiding.

You're avoiding this shit out of me. Hanging out with your friends because of the way you look. I'm like, what? Yeah, but it also makes sense at that age. Someone asked me something the other day. They're like, were you there at that party? And this was like, I don't know, 17, 18 years ago. And I remember the day.

And I said, no, I wasn't because I had a really. bad breakout and I didn't go. You remember that. And I remember it. And I remember not running into the guy I liked because I didn't go because of the pimples. So imagine all of that being documented and put out for the world at all times. And you have no control. And then it's out there forever too. Yeah. Right. So it's not like you can get it taken down or because you don't know how many is get reposted. Oh my God. That's brutal. So I, um, I, will tell you the one thing I've been saying to my girls since they were, you know, tiny, tiny, tiny when they got their first like iPad or whatever, I just started saying, listen, you never,

ever speak to adults online. I was like those, if an adult ever reached out to you, they're a bad person. They should, adults should never ask kids for anything. No. So do not ever speak to an adult. Come get me immediately. And that has come into play a couple times recently. Well, they all. They Also, like adults pretend to be kids. Robux or Roblox? So my kids don't do that. Okay. I kept them off of that.

Yeah. I didn't really. I was just lucky, I think, that. Yeah, it was kind of like, you know, older or four. Uh-huh. Mm-hmm. And I keep, I just drilled this into their heads. Don't ever post anything that you're not comfortable with your grandmother, your teacher, me, your dad, your uncle.

You're, if you're not proud of it and you don't want. All those people reading it, do not post it. Yeah. And then, you know, they have to get things cleared by me. And funny enough, my kids don't post really. Like they... It doesn't seem like any of the younger generation posts. They think it's...

They talk on, like, Snapchat or something, right? So they don't text anymore. Right. It's all on Snapchat. Oh, and that disappears, right? Yep. It disappears. So that's kind of love that.

I don't love that either. I don't like that at all. Yeah, they don't text. They only talk on. on snap and they don't post. They don't post. Instagram is like not. That's right.

Instagram is not really their thing. No. But they have them to look at everyone else's stuff. I mean, they're all watching. Yeah. That's the other thing. It's very like they're all spying on each other. I don't know.

It's weird. It's so weird. And it's so unhealthy. And what's crazy is that we know this. The whole world knows it. Well, all the studies they're doing and the mental health and even the suicide rates with like some of, you know. No, and they talk about it all the time, and a lot of it leads back to the screen time on their phones.

That's right. And the screen time has, I think, completely changed the way their brain fires, how much patients they have, the instant gratification. But wasn't it the prime minister of Australia who banned all social media? media for kids until they're 16, which I, something, yeah, something. That just happened. I think it should be 18. And I'm like, 34. Hallelujah. Yeah. Yeah. Well, yeah, we know what it's. Because we all know it's, and that's what he said. I remember watching him on the news and he was like, we've got to stop like turning a blind eye to this. We know it's hurting our kids. If it were anything else, we would try to stop hurting our kids. So I'm doing this. And I just thought that was great.

And I know it's like, people are like, freedom. Parents should be able to decide. What about that? So your kids are on social media. And, you know, there's a lot of your personal life that's out there on social media. So that is where recently, you know, I've had to really, you know, I watch every, all their stuff. But, you know, adults are reaching out. Oh, no.

Like, DEMM. posing as no, yeah, DMing them or sending them messages or trying to follow them because they have private accounts. And, you know, I don't know how nefarious it is, but I just stop it because I'm like, adults should never reach out to children. That's all I know. That's all I know, period. Period. Period. Period. Period. And that's it. So, but it'll be disguised as, you know, oh, I'm just checking it.

because I love your dad and I just want to make sure. And I'm like, that's an adult. Stop. Yeah. It's a stranger. It's an adult. You don't need to speak to them. But like another layer of them to have to deal with, you know, when you're going through

so much personally in your own lives and it's like your father and then it's out there. And then that added element of the public being able to reach them. I know. And it's, yeah. No kids should have to deal with anything. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, that part has been extremely tricky to figure out how to handle it all. Yeah. And also just to, I think for them trying to figure out how, like, what they're feeling, like, they're just, they're having such complex feelings about it all. Of course.

And because it's public, it confuses them. Yeah. especially when certain things don't align. Right. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Like what they're seeing, but what's actually happening. And then, you know, yeah, it's very complicated. It's very complicated.

Yeah. Yeah. But it seems, well, this is another thing. I'm going to say it seems like from the public eye, like how supportive you have been in this whole process. And, you know, it's been very positive and all of that. But also you're in it, too. So you're out there.

At least on our out. algorithm. Yeah. On our algorithm, that's what it looks like from the outside. Yeah. No, I am definitely trying to, you know, show them that we show up for people, no matter what. Right. And he is our family.

He is your father. And, you know, yeah, we show up and we try to do it with some. dignity and some grace and, yeah, and just get through it and that we will get through it the best we can. I mean, it's super complicated for me. Of course. You know, we've been separated for eight years. Right. The kids live with me 100% of the time. And, you know, there's been lots of just stuff, other stuff. And, Yeah. So I'm, I try to stay optimistic, though, about it all. I'm trying to learn from it and role model for them how to go through something like this, which is really hard. Yeah. And I don't know if I'm doing it well or if I'm being doing it in the wrong way or the right way. I'm just showing up. I'm showing up and I'm trying to be there for them. And I guess time.

We'll tell. Right. Yeah. I mean, you're parenting two beautiful teenage girls. Thank you. They are. And they're good girls. They're good girls who are just going through a lot.

Yeah. Yeah. I just feel for them, you know, just. Thank you. I appreciate that. That's so much. And also when you say, like, you know, you don't know if you're doing it right or nobody does. And no matter how you do it, it's going to be right and right.

wrong. Again, two things can exist. Like, there's no perfect way to navigate such big, heavy life circumstances. We were just talking about this before. It's like it is life on life's terms. It really is. And there's no crystal ball. No one can see that these things are coming. And my question always goes to kind of more of a spiritual realm of like, if you're looking at like what your curriculum is, in this and being like, okay, if this is either happening for us or against us, what is here for us? And are you looking at those kind of things and what's your journey like in that way? Well, listen, I am definitely experiencing growth as a person, as a human being. It's all very humbling. And I think one piece of this that I hope I'm passing to my kids is the idea that you can show up for someone and be there for them, but you also have to show up for yourself.

And that this is life. Like, life, sadly, is just moments good and bad strung together. Right. Like, there's going to be good ones. there's going to be bad ones. There's going to be exciting ones. It's going to be really sad. That is life. And I keep also just the you never know what you're going to get. And we should treat today as a really special day. This is an address rehearsal. This is it. Whatever we're doing today, this is our life. And I think when I was younger, I didn't have that philosophy. I would be like, oh, when I'm this, life would be great. Yeah. Or when I'm, you know, when I get this job, it'll be great. Or when this happens, it'll be great. And, and that's all bullshit. You know.

Totally. All of that is bullshit. All that chasing things. Yeah. I mean, this one, this one is particularly difficult because I want, I just want to make sure I provide them with the opportunity to spend time with him. so that they don't ever look back and go, I wish I would have spent time with my dad. Or I wish I would have, you know, said this to him or ask him these questions or been there, you know, for him in a different kind of way. Like I really want to make sure I can help facilitate that stuff for them, which is what I'm doing. And that's amazing because then they get to. One of the things that helps me is always being like, when my head hits a pillow, am I okay with if I lost them tomorrow?

The person you are that day. Am I okay with the way I showed up? Yeah. Yeah. And if the answer's no, then we, of course, correct. Right. Right. Right.

Right. But like having that as a gauge of like it's a different situation knowing that this journey is going to be completely. completely uncharted, knowing like at the end of the day, when you go to sleep, do you feel right with you? Exactly. Exactly. I mean, that's what it is. Can you go to bed at night? Yeah.

Can you live with yourself? Right. Yeah. Right. So that is the question. And that is why I am doing a lot of what I'm doing and so that I feel good about how I handle things. And so that my kids can also. maybe one day say or remember like okay we handled that in the right way the best we could

I mean I don't know what their takeaway will be right yeah can't yeah I don't know what their takeaway will be I know it's super complicated that right now um for so many reasons and um I I just hope that you know they can get through this and feel okay about it you know And also, you know, I keep my, one of my therapists said to me, one of my therapists. I love it. I know. I was like, yes. I love it.

Because there's a lot of them. Yeah. Yeah. It's really like, listen, you have to take care of yourself. And I'm not good at that. Because I was raised, you know, in like, you're a strong woman. And, you know, the more you suffer, the better of a person you are. And, you know, really, like, not, like, they didn't mean that in a bad way, but it was just like,

you're strong. You can get through anything. Yeah. You know, just pull up your big girl pants and do it and get through it. And so I. Coal miners, daughters. But like you don't, yeah. Like hard work or get you anything. But, you know, you don't get a medal for suffering and not taking care of yourself. Right. Or prizes at all. No, no price. There is no. None of that. Yeah. And that's where I've been failing miserably. So I'm trying to do better at taking care of yourself. Yes. And those areas. areas and teaching my kids that. That's the hardest thing. I know I'm like you. Yeah. Of just like maybe not, you know, maybe I need to do more for myself and be a little more selfish. And but my kids are so not used to that. Right.

Because then there's the pivot and so how are they going to. Exactly. And the timing of everything. Yeah. That's tough. But more is caught than taught. So. Wait, say that again.

More is caught than taught. So they're going to get more from watching you do it than whatever you speak and teach. Right. So they're going to catch more than anything you can say to them. Right. And so it's a gift to them. It may feel selfish, but it's not. It's self-being.

There's a difference between I'm going to abandon my family and go, you know, which is not what you're talking about. You're talking about taking care of yourself. Right. Right. Right. Right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And so that pivot for them, while it might be uncomfortable, could actually change the rest of their life.

Could be good for them. That's right. Yeah. And so that's a lot of where I've been thinking about things. And because when I got pregnant, I wanted kids so badly. And I waited until the very last minute. You know, I gave birth at 38 and then at 40. So I really waited.

I, you know, stopped working because he had a better job. And, you know, and that, I feel so grateful that I had those years with them. But I always tell my girls, I'm like, one thing I wish I would have done differently is just kept my foot in the door a little more. Like, kept some options open because now I'm trying to return. And boy, is it different? Yeah. Wow. Completely.

It's such a different world. It's so different. It's upside down. I'm like, first. So hard. I mean, there's so many obvious things that are so different. But like the putting yourself on tape in your house by yourself with no direction and no. Nothing. And then it goes to the abyss and then you hear nothing and you're just like, what? And I'm positive they don't watch these tapes. They can't watch all of them. Right? Like they get through the first 10 and when they find someone, they're like, we're exhausted. We're good. We're good. We got her. Or they just went off an offer anyways. Or it was just an offer and we were just backup. Right. Yeah. We were the backup tapes. So. But it astonishes me that all of that work has landed in our laps, number one. And number two, like, I was a good auditioner. I love going in a room.

Oh, my God. Really? Yes. I think it's the worst thing ever. No, I loved it. I only got jobs when I was like, like, I loved going in because I was like, I get to do this for five minutes. And I don't know, I was just good in person for some reason. It was like a thing.

It was a thing that worked for me. Yeah. Like something. And that's been taken away from me has made this so difficult. So that is very different. And also what's so different that just makes me laugh is the fact that, I mean, back in the day, and this was way back. This was like, you know, like we trust ourselves for air proof. movie premieres.

Right. We dressed ourselves to go to the junkets. We dressed ourselves to go on a talk show at night. Like, you were you. Yeah. And there, people get dressed by stylists now to leave the house. Right. To go to.

And it's a lot. It's a lot. And I'm like, I'm not sure I could handle it, to be honest with you. Like all that hair and makeup and all that. It's a lot. Sure. It is a lot and it's different. And God bless the girls who do it well because they do do it well and they look amazing. And it's gorgeous. And I love seeing all these gorgeous women and doing it all. But I laugh because I'm like, I don't know. I just think about some of the things that I wore. But what about then you've got, you know, your Pam Anderson who just flipped it on its ass. He flipped it. Yeah. And was like, you know what? Here I am now. And boy, did she. change the course of...

Yes. Who she is and how she shows up in the world. And she really did it. She sure did. And I think she must have... I mean, I don't know her at all. I've never met her actually. I've met her once.

Have you? You met her? I've heard she's super nice. Yeah, she was nice. But I feel like it happened, like she... It was very authentic. Yeah. That she went away and she was like contemplating all these things and just kind of trying to

like ground herself. and it just sort of happened. Yeah? Which I love that. Yeah. I'm moving to Vancouver Island too. Right? Yeah.

I'm baking bread. Yeah, I want to go work in that farm. Yeah. Right. Yeah. It is really cool. It is. It is.

To see. And yeah, it's hard. I mean, just being a woman and in this business and everything is just like. Yeah. It's a crazy thing. And I can relate, though. I remember. I feel like it was like the last generation of

dressing yourself or whatever. Now I look back and it's like, oh my God, what did I wear on TRL? Like, right? There are so many layers. I know you say TRL and you're like, and people are like, what is that? Yeah. Isn't it sad that MTV is gone? It just went away. And it was so sad. No, it started in 81 so at the year I was born. And it was like, it was 44 and I'm like, oh my God, that's like my life, my entire life. Yeah. Listen, MTV was everything. Everything. Everything. I was And it was born and seven. Oh, my God. Just so, you know, so I'm 10 years later.

Yeah. So MTV, I remember when it premiered. Because, yeah, you were 10, so it would have been like. It was like, course. Me and my friends would, like, sneak and stay up to watch it because it was the music videos. TV. How could it be gone? I don't know.

They're going to bring it back, right? I don't know. I don't understand why people don't want to watch music videos anymore. But I don't understand how people still make music videos. But where do you watch them? I don't know. This is us. We're like, and wait, how do I hurt this channel?

But also, exactly. Like, what? Because where do you watch them? Where do you watch it? I mean, if you're Taylor Swift, you make a movie off of it and you go to the movie theater, clearly. Right, right. That's what we did. That's what we did.

Absolutely. But what about, like, there was, who did that one? Then they, it was like, Megan Fox. Fox's X. Machine Gun Kelly? Did you guys see that video? No. Okay.

See, where do you see it? Okay. So I only saw it because someone sent it to me. And they were like, did you ever think that he could dance? And I was like, he's a dancer? He's too cool to dance. Like, wasn't, isn't he like the cool guy? I did see that video.

You did? Okay, I did see that video. Wait, does he dance? He's like a pop, like actually? Like a boy band dancer. What? Yes. Yes.

He's really got so many bags, you know, wait, so many tricks in his bag. Exactly. He's like, it was very unexpected. And I was like, this is great. This is like a sort of a video. Like a throwback. Yeah. There's a throwback boy band kind of.

Pregnates, Megan. Fox this dude can do it all. He's got it going on. He really does. Because I thought he was sort of this, I just had a whole other vision of who he was. Yeah. Yeah, for sure. And so it was really fun to see that, but I only saw that video because someone sent it to me. I don't know how they saw it or where you watch them. Right. No clue. All right. If the youth is listening, we want to know. Yeah. Where do we watch music videos? Where? And they must spend so much money on them. Right. Yeah. They're like money on the video these days. Maybe they just They put them out on TikTok.

It's probably YouTube. YouTube. I bet it's YouTube. Yeah, it's YouTube. They put them on YouTube. Because I know you can watch sports on YouTube TV. They watch everything on YouTube. So it must be YouTube.

YouTube is taking over the world, huh? Yeah, I think so. I'm just going to play it out there. I mean, it's been around forever. But that's like my nephew is 18 and he's our nanny, manny. You know, and he takes care of the boys. And my boys only want to watch YouTube. And I'm like, no YouTube.

And they're like, well, Liam's watching YouTube. And he watches. his kind of content on you, like, they don't watch anything else. Like, they're not watching it on TV. They're not watching movies. I still have cable in my house, like direct TV. I have direct TV. Yeah, like along all the apps, but I still have it. I still have a home phone. I do too. Oh, really? Oh, no, I do too. And my daughter, I'm getting her like the regular landline to call her friends. I have the cord list, but like an old school phone. Yes. Yes. That's what I have. I have a landline for sure. I have that. I keep it just in case. You never know. Oh, yeah. I'm not

trusting these cell towers. Same. Same. Like in any case of emergency. You need a landline people. Right. And cash. How about cash? How about carrying some cash in your pocket? Can't even use it most places. I know. I mean, I've learned this from my kids. And I'm like, here's a 20. And they're like a 20. Who's going to take the 20? They're like Venmo me, mom. Exactly. Or the green light card. Oh, yeah. What is that? It's like a kids ATM, basically. By the way, you should try that for your kids if you have it. I think I will eventually. And there's an app and you can control. So it's an app and you, it's like a credit card for your kids. And every week I give them allowance and I give them their age. So Billy, Georgia gets $13 and Billy gets $15. And I've been doing it since they were like $7 and 8.

Yeah. So they've saved up money. Good for them. And on this app, you can like invest it. You can set a goal for something you want to buy. And then if they're in an emergency, the parents can send extra. Like, once they're teenagers, they can say, I ran out of money. Can you send me?

And you can just automatically transfer it. So it's kind of convenient. Yeah. And it's on their phone. It's on their phone, but they also have a card, an actual card. But my girls are, like, investing. That's so cool. I like.

I love that. I want to teach my daughter and her dad's been talking about that with her, like, starting. an account so she can invest. Yeah. That's, I know. I know. These young people are on it. My nephew, he was like day trading in the car next to me. I'm like, what do you do with you? And he's like day trading. And I'm like, because it's so easy the technology for them. I know. Oh, yeah, they can work everything. They can do everything. So. It's amazing. So well. Yeah. I know. I ask my kids to do a lot for me. I love that. Oh, I do too. My daughter, not only technology, like building shit. Like her soccer

goal. I was like, Briar, I did this backwards. And she just goes and she waved the thing. Yeah. Oh, my God. That's so cute. You know, she's really good. Oh, is she good at soccer? Yeah, she's, she's decided that she wants to just, like, focus on that right now. So hopefully, you know. But she's good at, she does all things. Like, she sews. Oh, that's great. She's amazing at the things that I can't do. Like, the crafty shit. Like, I'm not crafty. You know, it's funny. Kids figure out what they like. I mean, my, my youngest loves volleyball. And I have to She does. She's, you know, smaller. And so when she walks out on the court, people don't really expect too much. I like that. She's really good.

She's so good. And she's so strong. And I think it's because she's a little bit smaller. She puts a lot of effort into it. And then my other one is a ballerina, like a ballet dancer. I should have been doing that a long time. She started, yeah, when she was like 11, which is late, actually. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

That is later. It's later. She found that. And she's very good. She does like the Nutcracker. Aw. That's amazing. But I love watching them do their stuff.

Someone put it really while we were talking to Owen. Oh, yeah. And we said, we're like, you did a great job with him. And she goes, I like to say, I didn't do anything. He came wired that way. I just plugged him in. And I was like, what a great way. Like, that's our job as parents just plug them in the right.

outlets. Yeah. Right. Pretty much. Because sometimes they short circuit. Sometimes they do. And you're like, oh, this is a wrong outlet. Like this isn't what they're here for. Right. You know. I mean, we've pivoted so many times with so many things. And I think that is something else that I had to learn. And you know, your kids teach you so much. Like they, they just really, they're great teachers. But the pivoting. They're like, okay, this isn't working. Let's pivot. Let's find a solution to this problem. That's why they do so many things as kids. Like, yeah, soccer and my daughter, but also tennis, she wants to do volleyball and she sews and she wants to dance. Volleyball is so much fun, by the way. Yeah, I mean, I would, I love going to any game. Like, I get so into it.

So I'm like, yes, anything you want to play, I'm there. Yeah. I know. I'm on the side embarrassing. Yeah. Yeah. Totally. I love that. Yeah. It's for that. What about, so how is that raising two girls as a woman on your own? What is that like when it comes? comes to love life and your private time and how do you navigate such big deals? Well, it's been so difficult, really, because, you know, I think it's with girls, it's hard. Like, you want to, you know, be, I just haven't dated very much. I dated a wonderful man for two years, and we are kind of on a break right now. since all the stuff has been happening in our family.

Because I feel stretched so thin. Yeah. And the girls really need me even more now. But it's been hard. I really didn't date a lot and haven't dated a lot. So I would say it's been very difficult to find my own level. life during this time. Yeah. Well, it's hard to fit someone into that. Well, it's hard to fit someone into it. And now it's impossible because they're not going to be accepting of anyone. No.

Because what's going on with their father. And it was hard before his diagnosis because, you know, all kids want their parents together. They fantasize about that. Sure. But I think I probably, in the past, could have, you know, been a little more adamant that I was going to take time for myself. And I did not. But it's, you know, it's not like my other friends who are divorced who get 50% of their time by themselves. I get zero time by myself. And it's just that's different. It's really different. It's really different. You know, parenting is really different because it's just you. And being, you know, a single, it's just different. It's like you're on. I feel like I'm on. I feel like I'm on duty 24-7.

It sounds like you are. Yeah. It doesn't sound like you feel like it. It sounds like you are. I think I am. But I do want to go back to work and I do want to now do things for myself. And I want them to see that because I think it is important for them to, I think they do learn a lot just by us role modeling for them.

Right. And so I want to do that. I'm just trying to figure out like how and I've been, you know, how to navigate getting back into that. Yeah. And just the balancing act of all of it is impossible. It is. It's really hard. I know. I mean. It's really hard. I have so much respect for the women that I see who balance really well. Yeah. You know, and I know that they still struggle. Right. That it's not perfect. It's never a perfect balancing act. Something has to give. How do you guys do it? I, you know, I'm similar to you. Like I have my daughter all of the time for the most part because, you know, her dad works. a lot. Right. And so my life is her, but it's how I want it to, you know, like I'm actually

very content. Well, that's so that's how I felt. But now I'll tell you what I'm starting to think about. And this is very recent, very recent thoughts of, because Billy is a sophomore. She's going to be going away to college. And Georgie is starting high school next year. And then she will be, and what happens when they're gone? I know. I think I know. So I think we have to prepare for that.

Right. It scares the shit out of it. I mean, some of my friends think I've been saying that, like, I still enjoy having my daughter sleep in bed with me. And I'm like, I love it. Yeah. I love it. I was like. I don't know that I could sleep if she wasn't next to me.

Like, I would wake up all night long. And I know one day she's going to wake up and be like, I'm out of here and never come back. Yeah. You know, because that happened with Billy, too. But I do think we have to prepare. I know. Because it's going to be awful. You guys sound very similar.

Yes. You really do. In your, it sounds like your girls are your life and that you want it that way. Yeah. And it seems very similar in the way you guys show up. Yeah. It does. Yeah.

Yeah. And I love it. it. Me too. You know? And it's hard for some people to understand that. I think they feel like, what are you doing? Yeah, you're dating out. Why are you not going out? Why are you not? I'm like, I don't want like, I'm happy and I feel like my time is so short like you're saying

they are going to go off. They are. And yes, we have to prepare ourselves, but also I want to look back just like you're having them experience their experiences. So when they do look back, like feel fulfilled in everything that they did do. Yeah. We're present for or and I don't want to look back and be like, I wish I would have done that. Or it's so much more important to me that I am there.

witnessing everything with my child that we brought into this world. Right. And are raising as a human than anything else. Same. It's just my mentality. Same. Listen, when, when Billy, my girls are 22 months apart. And so I had two little ones. And I booked this job. And I was, I mean, Georgie was probably, I don't know, six months old. I mean, so little, so little. And Billy was, you know, two. And I said yes to the job, and then I panicked. I literally panicked because they started doing the negotiations of like, you know, how to, because I was like going to have to bring both kids with me and I was going to bring a helper with me. And I was breastfeeding.

And I literally pulled out of that job. And because I was so overwhelmed. Sure. I couldn't do it. So I think about actresses who were. able to bring their kids to set and they were okay doing that. Like, I wish that was me, but it's just not me. And that's okay. I wasn't able to do it. Yeah. Yeah. So. I know. I still think back like my daughter was three years old and I took a job. That was the first time I took like a

job job and we, she moved with me. And I'll never forget. I still have this picture in my phone when she burned herself on the heater, like a portable heater and I was at work. Oh. And her face. Like if I think about it. And I'm like, I wasn't there. She was with my mom. She was with her grandma. Yeah. Yeah. And her dad too. Yeah. Was obviously around, but it was just not being there. And I'm like, I can't not be there. No, you turn down.

Well, because you feel, I've turned down. You feel trapped on set. I mean, because you are. You can't leave. But I think now, you know. Now they're at an age where you. Yeah. It's different now.

It's different now. It's getting, it's becoming different. I mean, it's fine for my oldest. My youngest still would love if I never left. after side. I mean, you know. Yeah. Yeah. Like she wants she. I'm holding on to that as long as I can. Yeah. Like, as long as she wants me there. Because like you said, they're not going to want you one day. I mean, I took them trick or treating on Halloween. Her and her friend, I was out walking the streets, which is where I saw Alana. Alana. I know. I had some of the girls that my daughter's were like, can we go off by

ourselves? And I was like, you know what? We're not there yet. Like I'm still coming with you. Absolutely not. And Briar, like, she wants me there too. Right. Of course. But I was like, We're not there yet. Exactly. The 13-year-old or 14, whatever, the older girls that were there, I'm like, they're going off five, but you're 11. And I let them go off, but I could still see them. Yeah, of course.

Yeah, but you have teenagers. Yeah. Yeah. I was chasing, literally running down the street to just keep eyes on my older son. I was like, I'm jogging. People are like, hi, I'm like, I can't. You're like, I'm a jogger. It's hard.

Yeah, what are you for all of me? A jogger saving my child. How old is your son? Is that 10? Oh, he's little. He's little. And she has a six-year-old too. But they all were running like crazy. And I was like, this is no fun. I know. And when it's crazy. Halloween is the worst. It's really bad. I know. I hate Halloween. I love Halloween, but I don't like that part. I'm such a hater of Halloween. The candy, the costumes, the drama of the costume not being right. Oh, gosh. My daughter like totally pieced out on me last minute. We were both being the same thing. We were being squished. And then she changed her costume? Yeah. She was a mummy. Yes, I know.

She didn't wear that squish me. She was like, this is my favorite costume I've ever gotten. And for some reason on Halloween, she's like, I want to be something more in theme with Halloween. Uh-huh. That happens. She left me and I walked around as a squish mellow. By yourself.

By myself. All Elliot and all his friends took their costumes off. Okay. And I was like, you guys are not teenagers yet. Like, and they were going up and all the people are like, where are your costumes? And they're like, we ditched them. We're just here for the candy. Yeah.

You're like, you're not there yet. I remember we did that as teenagers and they'd be like, where's your costume? You don't get candy if you're. And we'd be like, we're 902 and O. That's funny. It was good. I'd be like, I'm Brenda. That's Kelly.

Okay. That's hilarious. Oh, my God. And they'd be like, oh, that's great. Like, I see. Hilarious. Thank you. Oh, my gosh.

There's one house on our street that my kids always want to go to because it's an older couple and they always give them the big candy bars. They know the houses. Oh yeah. It's so funny. It's so funny. So when you're looking at your life now and you're like, okay, I'm at this chapter and you say you want to go back to work, if you were to create anything that you want right now, what is it? Job wise? Yeah. Ooh. I mean, if it worked for today. Yeah, today. For today. I would love to have a reoccurable. I would love to have a reoccurve. Yeah. occurring on a great show that shoots in L.A. So that I could be here.

With my kids, I could work enough to feel satiated, but also be a present mom. That's what I want. Drama, comedy, what? Ooh, it doesn't matter either. either. Because I haven't done anything in so long that I think I'd be excited for either. Yeah. And I do have trouble getting excited for something that shoots in Toronto or...

What's your birthday? I'm just like... I know. It's so hard. It's so hard. I know. We definitely... Don't listen to this, Stephanie.

Stephanie. I don't know, Stephanie, Simon. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, of course. I really do want to work. Keep looking. No, you're like, it's okay. If it's anywhere. It's fine, I swear.

Yeah, I'll go to Hawaii. Wait, when is your birthday? Yeah, I know. August 12th, Leo. August 25th. So same month. So when does Virgo start? 22nd, I think, or 23rd?

22nd? Something like that, 22nd? Yeah. Maybe. Yeah. Leos have a bad rap. I hate telling people my sign. Really?

Everybody loves Leo's. I feel like people hate Leo's. What? Oprah's a Leo. She is? Is she? Yes. Really? I hope so.

We're all looking over there. Madonna's a Leo. I mean, Madonna I can see as a Leo. Jennifer Lopez is a Leo. How do you know all? You're not even a Leo and you know all the Leo. Yeah. Because I worshipped Madonna growing up.

I loved Madonna. And I worshipped Oprah my whole life. She's an Aquarius. That's so funny. That's so funny. That is the best thing I've ever. That's hilarious. You're very inventing.

What are, what, I know nothing about Aquarius. Can we, do we know anything about Aquarius? No, apparently I think they're Leo's. I don't think Leo's have a bad rep though. No. I feel like they're the ones that like come in the room and we all know. I feel like people, I feel like we do because they're like, you want to be the center of the attention and you take up a lot of space. and you're the bossy.

I mean, that's how I... Maybe I've just had... I'm just projecting it. Yeah, but they also have a good head of hair. Thank you. I appreciate that. Yeah, but I think Leo... I actually think Leo's are super loyal.

Yeah. They're like... I think that's a known trait. Yeah, loyalty, very loyal. Like, maybe to fault. Like, really good friends. Like, Aaliyah will never turn their back on you unless you really wrong them.

Right. Like if you wrong them in a terrible way, they might. But otherwise, they'll never turn their back on you. Yeah. What are your girls? Yeah. Billy is a Pisces. Aw.

Yeah, she's like a very, she's very Pisces. She's so amazing. Creative, right? Oh, my God. Creative and sweet. Deeply intuitive, right? Deeply intuitive. Like, her, she can read a person.

She can figure a person out so quickly. So I let her help me sometimes. I like that. Yeah. And then Georgie is a happy capy. Capricorn. I don't have. Happy Caprican.

Happy Caprican. Happy Caprican. Oh, really? Yes. Yeah. So she's December 28th. Oh, wow. Right after Christmas.

I know. Oh, Christmas baby. Her due date was Christmas Day. Were you like, please no? Or were you like, yes, please? No. No, I held her in. Yeah. Yeah. I was like, you're not coming. I was going to say most people I think. You're not coming. But it didn't make a difference. What I didn't realize was like the 28th is just the same as the 25th. Right. It's still a terrible birthday for her kids. It's still the aftermath. Yeah. And she's, she always gets, you know, like the dual gifts. Like, it's your birthday and your Christmas present. Well, my grandma was Christmas Day and one of my daughter's friends is Christmas Day. And it's like, yeah. My daughter's two days before Halloween, which is different. But. Okay. I don't know. different. That's not Christmas because not everything's getting gifts. That was my old wedding

anniversary. Now we're getting in today. Oh my God. Really? The 29. October 29? Yeah. I got married on October 29. It's a good day. Yeah. Yeah. What is a good day? So you're a Virgo and what are you? Libra. A Libra. Yeah. Oh, Libra. Yeah. I know Libras. Do you? Yes. I do. I like Libras. I like them. I know Libras. You're sticking with it. Yeah. I do. I like, there's quite a few Libras I do like. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. There's some she doesn't. It's just, I don't have any. I don't. It's so fun to like. Yeah. I love it. I do too. I mean, I do a few witchy things like, I'll take my crystals outside and like charge back in the moonlight. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. There's a really big super moon on Wednesday. Yeah. Oh, really. What is it called again? This is out already. It happened before. Sorry, guys. Is it called something weird?

The Bush Superman? I don't know about that. No, the beaver super moon. What? Something weird. The beaver? Yeah. You just said bush and beaver.

Yeah, you've literally said bush and beaver super moon. Okay, everybody. Get them out. That's really funny. Charge them. Charge your beavers. That makes me think of those panties. I just, have you seen those panties?

The skim's ones? Yes. What are they? They look like a Merkin. Right? What does that mean? Yes. Like hair.

on the front. I'm sorry. Why? You haven't seen that? No. Why? It's like a G-string. Yeah.

And it has like a full bush on the outside of the underwear. On the outside of the underwear. I don't know. I guess. A joke. No. They sold out and there's a waiting list apparently. And you can.

Why? Color coordinate it? Really? Yeah, they're coming multiple colors. Yeah, yeah. All the range of the range of Cuba Care colors. That's right. Yeah.

Wait, no, I'm super confused. You have to Google it. A Merkin is a wig for your private. Yeah. Like, you know. Excuse me? Yeah. No, this is new information. No.

Who wears Merkins? No. A play or something. I mean, I don't know. Yeah, in a play. That's what it would have been for. But this is for. No, this is for the regular person.

I think it's for like shock value? No, I think it's for maybe people. I mean, I'm making this up, but maybe it's for people who don't. want to have hair down there, but because it's trendy right now to have a bush? Have a bush. Is it trendy to have a good? They put that on, but it's not the outside of the penis. I think it just looks fake and weird. I mean, I'd like to see one in a person. No disrespect Kim Kay. I'm just saying, like, I don't know. Does she wear one? I would like for her to explain the philosophy behind it. Yeah. I'm sure there is one. I mean, who came up with that idea? I don't know. I don't know,

But all I know is it's sold out. I mean, I'm just, I would like to see it in person. Can you go back really quick? Do bushes are in, on trend? I think so. So full bush? Full bush. Girls are growing up there full bushes.

Yeah, I think that's on trend. Okay. And are we seeing this in magazines in where do you mean this? No, I just heard this. Okay. She keeps her ear to the street, guys. I think I heard this. I bet the person then sent you the MGK videos.

also. Also grow out your bush lady. There you go. I've got friends who keep me in the loop. Yeah, exactly. Because I'm so not in the loop. But it is a curious question. You know about the Merkin and the bush.

I mean, it is funny, though. I know. I know. You guys, I have to look at it. You're going to die when you see it. I do want to see it in person. Okay, I'll look it up later. Well, in person, you'll have to order it.

Or you can. It sold out. Right? Do they have a store? They do have a store. They have a store, but you have to go on the waiting list, I think. You do go on waiting list for a bush G-string. I think they are sold.

This is 2025, everybody. Oh, my God. You never know what's going to be next. Stocking stuffers. I actually would like that. That's actually a great stocking stuffer. For your friends? For your friends?

No. For your friend. Oh, my God. Could you imagine? That's funny. That's a good one. That's like a white elephant party. That's what you bring. That's what you bring.

I bet you. Maybe that's why they sold out because the holidays are coming. up. Maybe. Yeah. And everyone was like, this would be a great. I really like that idea. Gala Bush. There you go. Here's my bush. I wanted to give you your Christmas bush. Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh. Hanukkah Bush, as they say. Honika Bush. That's right. Oh, my God. That's so funny. Okay. All right. We do Hanukkah and Christmas. Do you? Mm-hmm. Who's Jewish? Well, so their dad. He's Jewish? Mm-hmm. I did not know that. He is Jewish. Huh. I know. My dad's Jewish. Yeah. We always celebrate very

He loves Christmas, but we did Hanukkah Party. We had a Hanukkah. I mean, that's what we do. We do like a hybrid. Yeah. It's always a hybrid. It's nice for them to, you know. And it's great because they get, they do all the Jewish holidays with their friends.

And then they do. Right. Yeah. They get to do it all. Yeah. Same. We're the same. Yeah.

We're the same. Wait. I want to be Jewish. Nobody will let me. You know what? You can be Jewish if you want to be Jewish. I do. My Jewish name is Refka.

Oh, is it? You gave it to yourself? Refka. No. Oh, it's Hebrew. I have, it's Hebrew. I speak a little Hebrew. It's like the deaf community.

You're like, you get, I can only hear her son where they give you your name. And she thought the Jewish religion they gave you. They have to let me in. They gave you Rufka. Oh my God, that's so funny. I mean, you could just learn the prayers. Yeah. I have a lot of.

I have a lot of men like, hello, Michelle Kirishan. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I always know. I'm not saying it right. But yeah. Like a burqatatai. I'm afraid I'm going.

Burukatai. I don't I. Listen, everyone. Do you know the end? No, never. I never know the end. I always trail off. Yeah.

Yeah. It's too hard. Anyway. Yeah. Yeah, the basics. Well, that's nice. Yeah, I just have a lot of friends who are Jewish and I've dated Jewish men and yeah, Jewish community is super tight.

Yeah, and it's great. It's great. You know what they say? Jewish community. Super tight. Super tight. On that note, thank you so much for being here. Thank you for having me.

This was really fun. So much fun. Thank you. This was awesome. All things. Yay. Wonderful. You're doing an amazing job.

I haven't done a lot of podcasts. Really? Yeah, this was kind of, I've only done like maybe a handful. So this was really special. Oh, good. Thank you. Yeah. Well, we appreciate it greatly.

Thank you. Yeah. Thank you so much. You guys are awesome. Podcast Pro. Well, I felt like I was sitting with friends. Oh, you are now. Yeah.

Yeah. Oh, thank you. Yeah. Thank you. Guys, I'm struggling with something. What? It's not a gene problem. No, it's not a gene problem.

My favorite backdrop of all of my jeans behind me in my closet. Olivia, like, told me what this is. but it permanently looks like I have a poppy seed in between my two front teeth. It's called a black triangle. Ooh, I kind of have one of those things, too, where, like, my teeth go toward each other, like a mini V shape. And then it looks like I just ate like a hot talk. Yeah, it's a black triangle. Yeah.

So now it's all I see. And I'm like, people just think I permanently have something in my teeth. And I want to announce before I talk to. anyone like just so you know this is my black triangle then when you floss you really showcase it too yeah which is annoying yeah and it's why i don't floss it's just totally it's just totally uh it's it's like a neon sign in my mouth is how i feel and um i don't love it uh i get stressed every time i go to the dentist even though i you know like any normal person brush my teeth every day but i am flossing, a comical amount leading up to it. And fortunately, I haven't had any major dental

issues, knock on wood. But I really like my dentist, but I do get stressed leading up to it. Always. Did I tell you guys, did we talk about my emergency gentle appointment? I mean, I know because you were telling me, but I don't think we talked about it on here. So I, Rachel, yeah, told me that she was going to the dentist because she felt that a popcorn kernel was stuck under her gum. This is a real, this is a real thing. And I was like, I was like, everybody's had that happen, right? Like, of course. But I'm like, you're actually, have to go to the dentist to get it taken out.

And I thought that was kind of banana. So she did, well, guess what happened to me the next week? The same thing. I was like, we're so connected that I now have a popcorn kernel stuff under my gum. And I got to the point where it was so unbearable. I had to go to the dentist. And it was like an emergency call the dentist. Go in.

Okay? And she goes, well, one, you have a cavity. Like they did x-rays. She's like, you have a cavity. And I told her, I don't numb. Like, it takes many, many shots to numb me. Okay? you guys no one ever believes me they do not believe me they're like okay okay and they start giving me

shots and they start drilling and i'm like i can feel it and they're like we just gave you three shots and this is a really easy tooth to numb i'm like i swear to god i'm not lying six shots in she has to stop because i'm not numbing and she keeps trying to drill and i'm like hitting her and i'm crying and she stops and she looks to me and she goes, I really just don't know what to do. Wow. And I was like, well, do you have like laughing gas or anything? And she's like, no, we don't do that here. And so.

We don't do that here. I know. I feel like, yeah. She switched medicines three times. Mm-hmm. Finally, by the eighth shot for one, two. Eight shots. Eight shots.

For one, two, she got me to numb and she got to. to do the work. But I think she was like, get this crazy lady out of here. I know I don't want her. And one of my good friends is a dentist and now I don't want to go to her because I don't want her to have to deal with me. Yeah. Shire what I really consider. Everyone else should go to Lauren Pavitz, but I don't, I can't. I'm like, I don't want anyone. A recommendation for everybody else. Oh, recommendation for everyone else but me. No, but it was excruciating. And then half of my face was like completely falling off. Oh my gosh. I'm sorry you went through that. I feel like I've heard that this is like a common experience for women that have a higher, they have a higher pain

tolerance and then doctors don't believe them and say, no, you're fine. Like, oh. So that's, that sucks to hear that. It sounds very painful and very scary. It's like a horror movie. It's like a horror movie. That's what it feels like. Feels like a nightmare. But the pain, because like it's You get sore after a shot in your gums. Like, I can't imagine having that many. Yeah, truly. Makes me a vomit. Makes me want to vomit.

Thinking about it. I'm just over here going through things I have on my vanity. Guys, don't mind me. What's on there? What's the latest? What do you have? It's like a La Prairie skin caviar harmony little bottle. And I'm like, what is this?

It's probably really good. Oh, wait. Let me see. what is it called? Do you see? Law Prairie, which is a very good skin care line,

like amazing. I swear on my life, I just bought that. What? Yes. Is it like a little dropper? It's a dropper. Yeah.

Do you get it at the dermatologist? I don't know. You know, this stuff's been sitting here a while so I can't really say where any of it comes from, but what did they say

to, what's it for? It's like, I'm supposed to use that in between, like it's like retinol one day and then not the next what wait how weird is this that we're so connected you get the popcorn in your gums and now i randomly pull out what you just bought from the dermatologist that is so weird didn't even know this existed what yes what yes I'm just that would be amazing how's the way he's he's so good um I truly feel like I

get, each week is a new thing that gives you like a burst of energy. And he is laughing so much now. We do this thing in the morning where I just like, I'm crouched over him and I just kind of shake my head in front of him and like my nose will like rub his like belly and chest. And he just cannot stop laughing. And then he like holds my cheeks and stuff. And I get goosebumps. It's like it's my new cup of coffee is just like, oh, I want to see him like light up.

And I think I talked like last week, his vision's coming in now. And so now you walk in the room and he's like, dad's back. Hey, hey. It's so crazy. Oh, it makes me miss a baby so much. I know. You guys have to come over and hang out with him. We really do.

And what's funny, too, is he's a very good people person. So he could be having a very bad day. And then someone comes over and he's, is like all of a sudden like oh hello good to see everybody um just a second and it's like where was this all day um so he's he's good with an audience that's really cute wait what sign is he again i'm sorry um july 8th i forgot is that cancer cancer yes cancer yeah yeah awesome aw so cute god i really just i know i miss the baby i know i miss the baby all these pictures always pop up and i I'm like, oh, my heart can't handle it.

And one of the benefits, as you both know, perfect excuse to get out of literally everything. I still use it. My daughter's 11. I'm like, sorry. Yeah, I have this excuse for the next 18 years. It's amazing. I look forward to using it. Used it for a couple of upcoming events that was just like, what if I could, guys?

So it's great. He's a very good boy. That's amazing. Yeah. Almost as good as an Irish goodbye. Was it you talking to me about this the other day, Lou? Mm-hmm. Are we all were talking about it?

Yeah. On here? Yep. Yeah. Wow. Remember I was saying if you really wanted to do it, you would just hang up on us. Right. And I got it right every time.

And then it was just, that's my takeaway. It was like, oh, I guessed every single one. Yeah. And that's all I took from it. What did you take away from our conversation with the lovely Rebecca? I took away a lot. I think she is just an absolutely wonderful, cozy. Mm-hmm.

What's the word? Kindred spirit. She's a person. She's a mommy. I love a mommy. You know? I'm back. Can I tell you guys one thing?

Yes. Please. So let me get your feelings on this really quick. Yesterday, I go to lunch with my friend after we volunteer at school or whatever. And like it's 12 o'clock on a Friday, right? Or whatever day, whatever. And we go and there's a live band at this little tiny cafe where there's like not a lot of tables. Like no matter where you sit, you're basically.

They're playing at your table, right? Very loud. Super random. Like a tiny outside cafe in the middle of like, no. Do you find that odd? Well, the way I can't pay attention. Yes. I get too distracted.

Saxophone, keyboard, singer. A little early morning saxophone. Singing, um, New York state of mind. If that paints a picture. Yeah. Here's my question. Is that like a daily occurrence? No.

No. No. You've been there. Oh, yeah. Here's my question. And this answers how I feel about it. What is the volume? Is it too loud that you can't concentrate?

Is it okay? It is so loud. Okay. I'm out. I'm out. I'm in the car. We're sitting right in front of them. and I'm just trying not to like completely like lose it and break and start laughing because every time we go to talk, it's like,

da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da- with the saxophone. And I'm looking at my friend and she's looking at me. We're both trying not to just lose it because they're like looking at us. Like we are the audience. It was like the most uncomfortable. Yeah, that's a sketch. But also, of course, we leave money in their, in their, you know. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Like, of course, like support the arts. It was just so loud. It was another curb. I felt like I was in curb your enthusiasm. That was the level of loudness and tiny quarters. Well, we've had this conversation. I've had this conversation with Jeff a lot that like when the people come up at restaurants and want to perform for your table and stuff, he's like it's the most awkward. Yeah.

Situation like a lot of times it's very awkward to be an audience member when it's not. a big crowd. 100%. Where do you look? It's just like you two being on an audience. It's really awkward. Like really uncomfortable. It feels like an intimacy I'm not really looking for.

Yeah. Correct. Yeah. So I'm with you. Circling back on a conversation we have like throughout the year, like that feels like an ick, like guy who's too into the band or like, I know it's your birthday. So guys, come over. And then it's like a band to play or something.

Oh, I would die. Yeah. What would you do if he got up and performed with them? Oh my God. That's how I feel like when people perform at their own weddings, like for their partner. Yeah. Uh-huh. It makes me feel a little weird.

Yeah. It's corny. I feel, and this may be a broad statement, but I feel like performing. should be an invitation. I don't think you should ever invite yourself to that person. Consensual. Do you know what I mean? Like, I think it should always be like, hey, we have this thing we'd like you to perform at.

Versus like, I'll do it. Like, I'd like to get up and sing one, you know? That always feels a little. Yeah. Yeah. 100%. That's a great character too. Like the person is like, oh, take the mic.

Like, you know. I don't know if I told you this story before, but I went to my cousin's wedding five, six years ago. And his mother-in-law sang, but she was shy. And so she did not stand up. She stayed seated and had a wireless microphone. And so there was a band in the back. But no one knew where she was. So everyone was looking back at the band.

And the band was shrugging like, we don't know where she is either. and she was in the very front row hunched over singing. That is amazing. It was incredible. That's the introvert just like wanting to release all there. That's really cute. That is really cute. Yeah.

Oh my goodness. I mean, but I am, to be fair, if I could sing, I'd probably be the person volunteering myself to sing at everything. She would. Yeah. 100%. Like I wish I could. Like she was kind of. coming over the other day and Breyer was home and she got a CD player for her birthday and a cassette

player. So like naturally I had like Mariah Carey someday playing and I'm dancing and I'm like, Briar, I'm like if Auntie Lulu walked in right now, guess what she would do? She would join on in. That's right. Sing at the top of her lungs. Is she enjoying that? Is she liking it? Loves it. She loves it. She does. Does she go in her room and like play music? 100% She does Yeah and she has like a kid Alexa you know

So she can like listen But she's using her CD and cassette player That's so cute I was out with our friend Nicole The other night And she had a purse And I was like Oh my God I love your purse

It's like a throwback And she goes look what I just found in it And she had CDs in it Like she had a What? In so long That there was actual Physical CDs in her purse

That's amazing I miss that You know That was so So fun. My best friend growing up, someone took his dad's CDs from his car. And it was like one of those weird moments where you're watching your friend's dad be very sad. He was like, man, I have like 100 CDs in there.

And that era where people would like steal, you know, stereos and like your sleeve of CDs and stuff. And burned CDs. You know, guys, one time someone stole our car. So I had a friend who lived with me and she was the driver. So it was like our car, but it was her car, but it was our car. And we couldn't find it. And finally, it was found. And when we found it, all the CDs were organized and put in order.

We're organized? What? The car alphabetically organized all the CDs. And this was back when, remember we had those books. Not the OCD car thief. Yes. I was thinking tweaker. I was like clearly there's some tweaking going on here.

But remember those big books to CDs that you'd put in the cars? Like, we 100% didn't have them. Alpha-bitized. No, but this was a very dutiful car thief. I love it. That's amazing. That is interesting. Pulling in their driveway being like, well, this is a mess.

Yeah, they're like Losers Oh and the ones you would make for people That's what I'm saying You would like Oh, that was the best Because you didn't know what was on it So everything was a surprise

Because now if you get a playlist All the songs are listed But before you wouldn't know what was on it And each song came a new revelation And it was such a flex It was like when you gave someone a CD you got to like really show who you were on all the levels like by your

like the way you curated you could really impress someone with one of those. Oh, 100%. Yeah. I miss it. Let's bring it back. Let's do it. I'm going to go in my garage

and see if my bin and CDs is in there. I just remembered it's in there. I'm going to keep anything. I'm worried it got thrown away though when it was being cleaned out this summer but I'm going to go look. The next party I go to, I want to like pull aside like three friends at different at different points and be like, hey, I burned you a CD.

You better pull it out though. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just having my back pocket. But please only put on songs from those air, like put on a smashing pumpkin song. You know what I mean? Oh, yeah. Uh-huh. We should start like a little revolution where people are burning each other's CDs.

I'm so down. I don't even know how you do that, though. I didn't remember how I did it before. I don't either. I think we have Leah do all ours. I swear, I felt like Leah did all my CDs for me. She was the queen, CD. The CD queen.

The CD queen. All right, we've said it here, guys. We're starting a revolution. We're doing it. Talking about a revolution. Someone could also really kill the vibe when they put on someone and you're like, Oh, interesting. Oh, yeah, 100%.

It's like, yeah, it's like your dating card or like, you know, or it's your resume. It really is because you're like, hmm, there's a lot of matchbox 20 on this, you know. Which now I would appreciate, but then I wouldn't have. Wait, what's the song that Leah and I always? That she sang and she impersonated them? Yeah, what is it again? This is how you remind. me of what I really am.

Who is that again? Why am I? You say sorry. Then waiting on a date for the story. What the heck? Nickelback. Thank you. Thank you.

2001. See, but now I would appreciate that. If someone just made me like matchbox and nickel back. No, but it opened up with like, this is how you remind me. I'd be like, in. In. Yeah, same. Yeah.

Second date secured. That's such, dude, that is amazing. I want everyone to, like, enter a first date with a mixed CD. Yeah. Yeah, I just feel like... That's the move for sure. Maybe a second date. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Because you've got to get to know their personality a little bit and then... Yeah, that's fair. Because otherwise it feels like you didn't really make this for me. You just made this. Wasn't there a date where we, like, that the guy, Olivia, like, so long ago, asked us to bring our favorite songs or something. What was that? Do you remember?

Was it a playlist or was it just writing out your song name? Was it written out your favorite songs? Or was it, do you remember? Yeah, it was like your top 10 favorite song. But just like write them out to like compare, right? Yeah. I mean, I was actually into that. I think that's a fun game.

I didn't like it. Well, you didn't like him. No. I was right. But it is a fun game. Like, bring your favorite your top 10 songs. It's a good icebreaker.

Yeah, you get to know the person. I don't know why. For me, it felt a little bit like a... Well, he was a little, yeah. Like, he wanted to show you how cool he was with his music taste. So it's like, and also, you know what I didn't like about that? Is like, do you do this on every day?

Right. You know? Right. No, totally. I don't like feeling like things are curated. Not like the person it came from, like that behind it. I'm just saying in general, comparing your top 10 favorite songs is like a fun game. That's all.

Yeah. That's all I'm saying. No, I want that for you. I agree. I want you to tell me your song. I agree. I agree with everything you're saying, though. Okay.

This was fun. So much fun, guys. All right, guys. Have a lovely time with your day. I'm not a such a lovely day. Cedies over. The mix is over. What's your end song really quick?

Last song on your CD. Sugar, Sugar by Baby Bash. What? What? Sugar by Baby Bash. You gotta give us a little. How you get so fly.

Oh. How you get so fly. Kevin's bringing it. I love that song. What's yours, Lou? I do too. Oh, man. You don't know, Rachel, so much pressure.

I told you what I've been really, into lately as I've been listening to like 90s grunge rock. So. So nickel back. No, more like the Pearl Jam. Why is my brain not working? Maybe like Jeremy. Like black.

Yeah. Like Soundgarden? No, not Soundgarden, not black. Oh, son. Is that the sound garden? Yeah. No, the one that's like, no, you'll be the song. In somebody else is sky.

Why, you know, why can it be? You don't know? Oh, can I be? As lovely as that was. She's a empty canvas. Come on. Oh, that sounds familiar. Yeah.

Oh, she's been her legs spread out before. All right, I'm going to stop. Okay. What's yours, Rachel? I'm going to go with just because this was brought up to me the other night. The boy is mine, Monica and Brandy. I'm just going to flip it on its butt and go. That's a rome.

That's a banger. Now you need to sing a little piece of it because I did. You need to give it a hat about enough in a hunt to see the boy in my. You're welcome, everybody. I'm sorry they're you. George went to their concert. They had like a Monica Brandy, that boy's mine tour. And that's why I thought it was.

Fun. It's amazing. Yeah. All right, guys, peace out. Bye. Bye. See ya. That was a Hidgum podcast.