Broad Ideas with Rachel Bilson & Olivia Allen - Seth Meyers on Pittsburgh, Hard Line Parenting, and Ted Danson

Episode Date: August 14, 2023

Seth Meyers talks with Rachel and Olivia about Mr. Rogers, Seth's relationship with his brother, and the worst thing you can do as a talk show-host. They also discuss Letterman, kid iPad-rules, and meeting their heroes.To hear more from Seth, check out his new podcast Family Trips with the Meyers Brothers, available wherever you get your podcasts.Broad Ideas is supported by Lume. Control Body Odor anywhere with Lume Deodorant, and get $5 off your Starter Pack (that’s over 40% off) with promo code IDEAS at lumedeodorant.com/IDEAS.Broad Ideas is supported by Blissy. Get better sleep now with Blissy and use code RACHEL to get an additional 30% off at blissy.com/RACHELBroad Ideas is supported by Mosh. Head to moshlife.com/IDEAS to save 20% off plus free shipping on your first 6-count trial pack.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hax is back for its fifth and final season, and so is The Hacks podcast. Join the Hacks creators and showrunners, Lucia and Yellow, Paul W. Downs, and Jen Statsky as they unpack the Emmy-winning comedy series. On each episode, hear stories from the set, what goes on in the writer's room, and how these beloved characters close out their final season. Watch Hax streaming exclusively on HBO Max and listen to The Hacks podcast on HBO Max, or wherever you get your podcasts. Welcome to Broad Ideas.

Today we have someone very exciting. Seth Myers is with us today. The great Seth Myers. The great magnificent. I am so excited to talk to him. Huge fan for a long time. He's a comedian, host, actor, writer, producer. I mean, he's done so many things,

but he has a new podcast, Family Trips with the Myers Brothers. He does. He does. Is that your podcast, Rob? It is a podcast that I produced, too. All in the family. But yeah, let's get to Seth.

Sometimes when the one's sick inside of Rachel's little brain, all these thoughts are swirling, round and round inside to join us on this journey as we take a little ride. about dogs and kids and things we'll talk about chicks and tampon strings we'll talk about boys that a need because people die first of all I'm very I'm very taken with the fact Rachel right away you are like dax you hold a mic well I would like to say I always do that but I'm traveling so I'm forced to just be awkwardly holding on my I see different I see a C different setup yeah but you know what I'll take it I'll take that I'm like I did I did I

did an episode of our podcast with Dax in person because he was here. Oh. And he was very casually holding his mic. Like, yeah, I realized, oh, he's an expert podcaster. So I started holding my mic. And then when it was over, my producers were like, well, you were way too hot. Because all of a sudden, you thought you could do it like Dax and you didn't check your levels.

And I was like, okay, okay. Well, we all just want to follow his lead. Of course, right? I mean, like, we're not crazy. No, this is my best friend, Olivia, by the way. Hi, Olivia. How are you? I'm doing great.

How are you? Good. Good. It is so nice to meet you, by the way. It's nice to meet you. I know you're introducing me to Olivia like you and I know each other, but this is an introduction for all of us. It is. But yeah, that's how famous people do it. It is that thing. But I do want to, I do want to also stress that it's very nice to meet you. Aw, that's so sweet. I don't want to pretend do that showbiz thing where I just pretend, you know. We're all always pretending, aren't we?

Yeah, yeah, we are that. We are. But we're so happy that you're here and you agreed to sit down with us and only talk about sex. No, I'm just kidding. Yeah, I mean, look, we can talk about sex. No, no. That's off, that's off limits as far as I'm concerned. But, um... That's, which is exactly how my wife describes it. There he is.

So good. There it is. But I love that you have just started this new podcast, and it's all based around family trips, and you're doing it with your brother, correct? Yes. And I have to tell you, just even like reading about it, it just instantly transports me to, you know, growing up and all the trips you take and all the shit that comes along with it.

And I think it's such a good idea for a podcast. Yeah. It was an idea we had for a while. Yeah. And, you know, we took advantage of this moment we're living through where maybe a bunch of us have a little bit less going on. The other thing that's been really nice about it that I kind of underestimated is I do feel like you guys have obviously figured out.

it's really nice to do one of these things with somebody you're close with because it sort of forces you to make time to have conversations with friends. And I think that men are worse at that the older they get, even if it's your brother. And so I don't think, I would tell anybody who ever asked that my brother's my best friend, but we've actually been spending an hour plus a week chatting. And we just weren't doing that beforehand. So that is one of the benefits of it that I kind of missed. as we came up with the idea. Yeah. Are you guys in the same city or does he live elsewhere?

No, that's the thing. So he's in L.A. and I'm in New York and we don't physically see each other that often. Right. I should also note I'm currently, I'm above a garage in a room that when I checked the thermostat when I came in was 85. So the AC's on now. And so hopefully over the course of this podcast, the light will come back into my eyes. By the time we end, you'll be okay.

Oh, my God. That's hot. Well, that's really nice that you guys are getting to reconnect and see each other and any excuse. I mean, it's so funny because Olivia and I just wind up talking all the time constantly. We don't understand how we still have things to talk about, but it is a good reason and a good excuse. How old were you when you guys met? Gosh. How old was I when I met you, like 14-ish?

I feel like 14. Yeah. So that's all you need. There's literally nothing you can't talk about. There's nothing. Yeah, we also, like everyone else is like, well, how do you still have things to talk about when you talk all day? And then it's like we have five minutes in the car and we call each other. Yeah.

Like we, it's kind of weird. My wife is very close with her sister. And I'm always, when they're texting, because oftentimes it will be that we have, we'll have just finished having dinner with her sister. And then we get in the car and I see they're texting. And by the way, it wasn't like. They were barely engaging me in the conversation at dinner. So it's not like, oh, now we have to talk about the real shit. Like, the real shit was happening the whole time.

Right. And I was just a bystander. And it's just so funny that they, and I'm very jealous of it. Like, they want to share everything. And I do feel like dudes sometimes have to force themselves into that a little bit more. Yeah. I think that's true. I don't think guys do that.

No. They don't do that. Some do. Many don't. But I do think that it's like this unique thing that women do. And they share and tell all to a fault probably in most cases. But it's just that, like, go-to. You can't help it.

I love the. I will say I text with Andy Sandberg, who's one of my dearest friends, every day because we both do the New York Times spelling bee. It's a word game on the New York Times. Yeah. And the extent of our texting is I finished. And then I'll say, I'm close. And then I'll say, I finished, and I'll say good job.

And there's very little about, I mean, we both have. children. We both have marriages. We're both very in love with our families. And yet we mostly just fill each other in as to where we are on the word game. And yet, I should say, brings me a great amount of peace and comfort to know that I will get that text from him every day. That is so sweet. Yeah. I love that. Yeah, girls will be, well, Rachel and I'll be at dinner and then I'll be like, oh, I'm craving ice cream. And then I'll leave and I'll get a text. Like, did you stop and get ice cream on the way home? You know, it's like a continuous conversation that you're just, you know, it's like a continuous just never stops.

Like, oh, well, did you get something from the store? Did you go in somewhere? Like, she won't be able to go to sleep unless she knows I got my ice cream. Right. Yeah. She's not happy with the time you spent together. It's never enough. I mean, yeah.

It's never enough. So you have three kids, correct? Yeah, yeah, yeah. And how old are they? Seven, five, and about to be two. Oh, my goodness. Oh, you're in it. I'm in it.

You got a young kid. But it's a joy. I will say the third one is like everything I wanted it to be, which is we have nothing left to give socially, right? There's no sacrifice. It's not like, well, we used to party and then we had a third. Like there's nothing left. We're just parents.

And so now we get to be more parents, which is super nice. And we had her first girl, and she is just such a breath of fresh air. I love our boys very much, but she's a different. cat altogether. And yeah, man, it's the best. It's the best right now. That's so cool. Were you going for a third?

Like, I mean, no, I'm not asking if you were going for a third. Were you going for a girl? Oh, yeah. Well, I will answer both questions, even though the first one, shame on you. No, we were, I think she was very much like we made the decision during the pandemic. I think we were happy with two. And then the pandemic happened and we spent so much time with our families. and our family, only our family.

And you just realize, oh, this is so nice. This time is so special. Would a, you know, one more, I don't think we'd ever regret. And so we weren't going for a girl, but our oldest really wanted a girl. And he kept saying, if it's a boy, just trade it with somebody in the hospital who just had a girl. And when we have a very good video of the day we told them it was a girl because they were so happy. And I've often said, I think if it had been a boy, my sons would have drowned in the bathtub.

They just were not. They were not looking for that competition. And she's no competition to them. Although my wife now fully tells them that Addie, the baby, is her favorite. And they can't believe that she's just telling them. And they also, it really hurts because they already sensed it. And when she says it as well. Yeah.

They already sensed it. I think that's so awesome, though, to have older brothers. and then you have the younger girl. I mean, she's going to be so set in life. Yes. Our current thing, though, is we will sit at the breakfast and these, I mean, boys, man, there's a lot to. But they, wherever my wife will be feeding one of them cereal, I'll be feeding the other one cereal. And our two-year-old, basically almost two-year-old, is feeding herself cereal.

We're like, are you guys not ashamed of this? You're just sitting here. That's right. It's awful. You're like, okay, you're good with this. You're just fully going to watch it. And I'm, when she babysits you, I don't want to hear you. Right.

So it's the other way around. I have two boys. And the older boy is like, can you get me? Can you make me? Can you? And then my four-year-old who's even like delayed developmentally is like going into the cupboards, getting his cereal, getting the bowl, climbing up and getting the milk. And I'm like, Elliot, do you see what's happening here?

Like he's going to turbo you if you don't learn. how to get a spoon out of the drawer. I worry, though, that your older one wants to say to you, yeah, I'm so sad for him that he hasn't figured out you can get an adult to do this stuff for you. Right. Like he thinks he's at so much farther advanced that he's found another human being to do his bidding. Yeah, really.

Which is true. Yeah. Which is true in a sense, right? It's manipulation is what it is. These kids, I mean, what we won't do. I try to think, like, how old was I when I actually? actually did things for myself. And I feel, well, we actually talked about this recently, too, is like, if we put our kids back in the 80s, they wouldn't survive, you know?

Right. They wouldn't know what to do with themselves. And it also plays into, I don't know if it's just that we just, if it's different now, or maybe my mom did do everything for me and I've just refused to believe. Yeah. Has she given you a balance on this? I mean, I feel like that's where it's so funny because every now and that I'll say to my parents, I just don't understand because I never paved like they're behaving now. And my parents look at me as if to say, no, do you think maybe you just don't remember that you were an asshole? That's probably more accurate.

Yeah. And it's just you and your brother? Was it just you two growing up? It's just the two of us. And we were intensely close and it was the four of us. And, you know, with my parents. And to this day, it is my wife, one of my wife's first observations when she came to the house I grew up in. My parents still live there is that there is that there is no.

no table in the entire house that sits more than four. Like, we never even took into account the guests might come over. And she felt it was very unwelcoming to a fifth person. She sits on the floor. Yeah. We basically said there's plenty of seats at the dining room table that we're not eating at tonight. And we will happily bring food into there.

Yeah. We also play a lot of four-person card games. which my wife also clocked. You guys just do a bunch of things before you. Well, I will say this is shame on my parents because I'll come home. My brother will be there and my parents say, should we play hearts tonight?

And my wife will say, why? This is not a hearts weekend. There's a fifth person here. A guest, no less. Oh, my God. Are your rooms still the same as they were when you were like teenagers? Thank you.

Thank you for letting me unload on what has happened to my childhood bedroom. My brother is a shrunk. to my brother. For real, still has the posters of his running for student council on the wall. That's what we're talking about. My room became a home office pretty quickly after I left. You're older. But not a very good home office.

I feel like it is a 1994 home office with a bubble jet printer and fax machine. But they definitely... Oh, my God. This is interesting. I can't figure it out because my parents live in a, you know, a suburban. home in New Hampshire, plenty of space, unlike anywhere I live in New York City. There's plenty of space. And an attic, a massive attic, and they have just been trying to get my shit out of the attic forever. And my boys are now finally showing some interest in things like comic books,

and my parents are coming to visit. And they finally just stopped asking. They said, we're going to bring a couple boxes of comic books. And this is my wife who hates clutter. going to be a real standoff in the driveway when these boxes get unloaded from the car is. But I don't understand why they can't just live in the attic. But I think they're just taking their space back. They're taking their space back. They're taking their claimant. Well, I think they probably also want your kids maybe to enjoy them.

No? It doesn't, I'm, that's very sweet of you to say, having not met my parents. Right. I feel like there's an ulterior motive. I feel like this is about them and not about my kids. But I think they might use this, this fantasy that you. you've concocted. Yeah.

I'm going to make sure they don't listen to this before. Oh, no, we're going to make sure. Disclaimers. They'll be like, no, it's what Olivia said. It's what Olivia said. It's for the kids. It's for the kids. We have all my husband's old toys.

And his house is the same since he was a kid. Both their bedrooms with their trophies and everything. And then they'll just send us boxes of Star Wars toys and of, and I'm like, this is actually pretty cool. It's all the original. Is your husband bummed? Did he want them to be in a safer place away from the grubby hands of your children? Or is he equally happy?

No, because it's not like their collectors or anything like they got played with. He didn't keep them in good condition. You know, they lived as they should be. I feel like, let's be honest, sorry if any of these people are listening. Nobody wants to be married to a guy who keeps it in the box. Right.

That is, you know what? That is so perfectly put. I feel like that's just like should be for everyone. If you're marrying someone, be the line that you. I almost think the day you get engaged is the day just go home and take them out of the box. You know what I mean? Don't let them find out then. No, yeah, don't. Or list it. Oh, that's the day you say, now I'm going to turn this into an asset of cash. Right. Otherwise, let's get rid of it. Yeah. When I moved out of my house, my mom was remarried and they just got rid of all my,

I don't have any of my stuff. I don't even know where it is. If there was one item of stuff that you wish you still had, Was there, do you have any? You know, I mean, I definitely. By the way, how long it's taking you to answer means they did the right thing. I feel like they decluttered your life. I know one thing that you still have. What do I still have?

You still have Grover. Oh, yeah. Well, we're not going to fuck with Grover. Like, he's with me forever. But, you know, like all the high school, like yearbooks and stuff. But you know what? Now that I think about that. Yeah, you should keep that.

So I have, if you came to my house in suburban New Hampshire, My parents, my mom, I should say, has been maintaining a scrapbook of my print media over the years. Woof. But it lives in my room, which I think is weird because it looks like I've been keeping it. But it's very sweet. Oh, that must be a really big book. That's a lot to keep up with. I think it was very sweet because based on how small a book she purchased,

I think she thought my celebrity is going to be short-lived. I think she went and said, maybe give me a 10-pager. This will be quick. And then... So that's interesting. How is that for them? Did they see it coming that you would end up doing what you've done?

I will say this. They were so supportive of both my brother and I, and I think they very much considered comedy and performing a noble endeavor and a cool thing to do. So my parents went to Northwestern in Chicago. That's where they met. My dad was an engineer. My mom was a theater major in the beginning.

She ended up switching majors. And then she was a French teacher when we were growing up in middle school. And then my brother and I both ended up going to Northwestern, and we both ended up doing comedy stuff there. And they would fly out any single time. We were on stage. They wanted to be there. They wanted to see it.

And the vibe you got from them is they were so excited and thought it was so cool. It does feel maybe like it's drifting. into stereotype now that all comedians come from, you know, dark, terrible families. But we were the opposite. We came from a generation where, you know, our parents grew up watching Saturday Night Live. So for them, that one of their kids ended up on it. Yeah. It's sort of on their wildest dreams. Well, we, it's so weird because I've always said, like, being hired for a show like SNL, it's so unique because when you get hired on for a pilot, it might end up being a huge show. But as you explain it to your friends or your family, it's like saying you bought a lottery

every ticket. No one's excited for you yet. Right. Whereas if you get hired on SNL, everybody from your guidance counselor to, you know, you track coach to your grandparents, they all know what the cultural impact of that is. So my parents definitely dined out on it for a long time. That's so sweet. I mean, it's such a big deal. That is the golden ticket, so to speak, right? And especially if they were fans of that show. That's just so rad that you got that and they, you know, were so supportive. And that is huge. I think. having that support. It is huge. I will say back before, you know, obviously our show's on a bit of a break right now. But my assistant every now and they would say, oh, your dad, some friends of your dad

are at the show tonight and he wants you to say hi after the show. So I'd finish the show and then I'd go to the green room and I meet these friends of my dad. And I would talk to them. They were always very lovely. And then I would say, hi. My dad's from Pittsburgh. I should establish. But I would say, how do you know my dad? And they would say, oh, I was on the golf course and I was wearing a Pittsburgh Steelers hat and he came over and started talking to me and then he told me who you were

and asked me if I ever wanted tickets to go see it. And so it turns out he just went, for the purpose of showing off, he went and made a friend who I'm now talking to more than maybe he did. Oh my God. And it was pretty great. That is good for him.

Yeah, he's for him. Yeah. Yes. I mean, parents do that even. Even if, you know, my husband's from Pittsburgh and his family, it's like if we run into anyone, they know everything about us and what we're doing in our life. And it could just be that we're working at the local pool. And to them, it's like, you know, everyone should know.

There's a real proud of you vibe in that city. I think it's very good. I think it's Pittsburgh. But do you know Bito's pizza? I don't know Vito's pizza. Vito's. I know Minio's pizza would be that my piece. of choice when I go back. I don't go back that often.

I don't got pit. My mom's from Philly. Do I count? Yeah, you count. No. You don't count. Not the same thing. I mean, you count as a human. You don't count as Pittsburgh. No, okay. One thing I love what you said about, you know, because I do think comedians obviously have, you know, the reputation of being dark and tortured and all of that. But having a seven-year-old boy and the truth of the matter is his life is really good. He doesn't have all the dark, torturing things that a lot of humans grow up with.

We watch Saturday Night Live. And he's really funny. And he gets the beats. Like, he gets beats. And I'm like, you know, you don't have to be all dark and twisted to be funny. Like, if you grow up in it and you're saturated in humor, you can still be funny. I agree. And that was the other thing.

It was just a currency in our household was comedy. And trying to make each other laugh and always coming from a place of just trying to make somebody else happy. Right. It's so funny that minus seven, and I feel like he's not at the place where I would let him. Or that I shouldn't say let him because I would love to watch us and out with him. I don't know if he would fully grasp it yet. I'm very impressed that your son's already there. Well, that's the great part is that the things he can't grasp.

I'm happy with the fact that he can't grasp it. Right, right. You know? Work goes over his head. Yeah. He still gets the beats, which little things that I noticed, like, there was this one sketch where it was like, oh, man, I'm all out of cash. And, like, they do that over and over. And, like, I stub my toe and I'm like, oh, man.

And like, a month later, he's like, I'm all out of cash. Like, he just, like, gets, like, it sticks with him in ways. And I'm like, oh, he's plotting that. But he's not getting the bigger ideas of it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It is lovely when kids understand the structure of a joke. That is a great breakthrough for them to make. Oh, my God.

I'm always like, thank God, if my daughter gets it, I'm like, oh, fuck, she's funny. She gets the funny. Thank God. How old is yours, Rachel? She's eight. So she's a little older. But still, it's a big deal. Now, did you and your brother compete for who was more funny?

I don't know if we did. I think that I was in a one man's race for my father's affection, and I wasn't paying much attention to my younger brother. And then I was very surprised that. when I went to college, I feel that was the moment my brother fully bloomed as both a really funny person high school and way better. He was in school plays, whereas I never did any of that stuff. And so it was that reminder that sometimes the older sibling has to go away before the younger sibling becomes the truest version of themselves. And then he came to college where I was,

and the same thing happened when I graduated college all of a sudden. He was a little bit. and he was the lead in the Northwestern musicals and things like that. So we weren't really competing for our parents' affection. And I almost feel like my brother very sweetly, internally knew he was better than me and waited until I left, so it would be less embarrassing. Are your parents funny? They're very funny.

I was going to say mom is probably the funniest in the whole family. You know, she's inadvertently the funniest one in the whole family. My dad's very much, I think if you drill down on things like struck, and form. That's very much my dad. My dad's a very good storyteller. And even though he was in finance, he was the funniest guy in most rooms I was in a kid, whereas my mom is just a lunatic and unique in a way. My dad is the best version of a thing you've seen before, and my mom is unlike anything you've seen before. I love that. I do too. I just love that he was in finance and, like, I think that that's the best when it's so unexpected and he's just in the room.

Well, I think he was so happy because when both of his kids made it in comedy, I think his expectation is that everybody in finance would say, oh, that makes sense. Larry's so funny. I actually had a wonderful thing happen recently. I don't know if you ever had anything. My dad just, I was 75. He just retired from the bank he worked for. And he worked remotely out of New Hampshire, but the bank's in New York. And so he was in New York for his retirement party, and he invited me to go.

and I went and it was so surreal to be around this group of bankers who had spent far more physical time in a room with my dad than I had over the last 30 years. That moment where you realize people are going to go up, you've never seen them before, they're going to go up to a podium and speak about your dad. And actually, if you listen, you're going to learn more about them than anyone would ever have the power to tell you. Because you just assume, oh, I'm a son. Nobody knows me better than, you know, me. But I'm like, why? I talked to him, what, half hour a week? Right, right.

Surely the people actually, you know, share an office with him and know more. So it was very cool. That is cool. What'd you learn? Yeah. That he's a lot like he was with me as a dad. Oh. It was my favorite thing was somebody said,

what we're going to miss about Larry is how he always speaks his mind. And what we're not going to miss about Larry is how he always speaks his mind. Yeah. Yeah. Latin and not chills is my dad. Very quick with an opinion. Oh. I wonder if that's generational.

Yeah. I don't know. No. I don't think it's generation. I don't want to forgive my dad by saying he was born in a different time. I think it might be more hardwired to his DNA. Broad Ideas is supported by Loomy. Don't let summer funk ruin your summer fun.

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Sleep cooler this summer with Blissie. Well, you know what I learned about Pittsburgh recently, too, is that I always looked at my husband as this kind of weird human because he's very curt. Like he just says what he thinks. He doesn't over care for your feelings. He's not a people-pleaser. And I was just in Pittsburgh.

for like a week and I was like, oh, it's the whole place. Every single person at every restaurant and every, nobody is people pleasing. They just say what they think and it's just facts. And there's no emotion to it in a way. Which is very weird that Mr. Rogers came out in Pittsburgh. It does seem very. It is weird. That is weird.

Yeah. Because you say that's the opposite of what you just described. I will say I love how proud Pittsburgh is of having Mr. Rogers. Well, that's huge. There's a giant Mr. Rogers statue. Yeah. And there's like the, they have like the whole miniature version of it. Yeah. What? Of his, of his set? Well, it's like the whole Mr. Rogers neighborhood. It makes me feel a lot of really good things inside. Yes. That is something to be proud of. Where did you grow up, Olivia? That was so different from Pittsburgh. In Los Angeles. That couldn't be more different. It's a very different. It's a wee bit different.

It's a wee bit different. But the thing is, is it no. Nobody's rude. I think that in Los Angeles, there's a lot of people pleasing. Well, I think that Pittsburgh just might be worse at being fake. That's it. They're just not fake. That's well put. They're just authentic.

Yeah. Which New York has a lot of that, too. I think that's true. This is the most near thing I saw recently was a guy was walking down the street and he dropped what seemed to be like a hundred loose leaf pieces of paper. You know, like some. big, like it seemed like a big report that he was about to get. And they were just like blowing everywhere. And nobody stopped walking, but they all would like point to where one was blowing away.

Almost as if like one's going that way. I was like just a minimum, the minimum amount of help. Oh my God. I like that. Yeah, I do too. It's also a perfect example. You just keep coming with these perfect examples, whether it's like, you know, that's, I should have done a podcast called examples. Example. Yeah, just millions of examples. Wait, so your podcast on family trips, right? Yes. We have this conversation a lot. What comes to my mind is, what do you pack?

Uh-huh. I like to know the food situations for where you go. She mainly wants to know the food situations. I'm just going to put that out there. I just want to know what you eat every day. Well, so I will say we were talking about this. So much of family trips for me, I was more excited about the journey and what sort of food you wouldn't usually get. For like a road trip where you'd stop at McDonald's.

We weren't a big McDonald's family. But if you were driving to go skiing, for example, there was no other option. Yeah. That was thrilling to me. And I think it broke my parents' heart that they would pay all this money for a ski trip. And everything would be downhill after my brother and I got, you know, McNuggets. That's what I'm saying. And they realized we should just wait for a snowstorm drive to a McDonald's, get McNuggets, and drive home and save ourselves a fortune.

Yeah. Are all your memories attached to that? Yeah, I remember, like, camping. All my memories about camping were stopping at the last convenience store before you would go into the woods and getting to, like, pick a soda and just being so. And then all, like, while my dad was setting up a tent, just saying over and over again, can I have my son kiss now? Could I have that sun kiss? And watching it dawn on him as he wrestles with a tent. My dad did not come from people who were adept at putting up a tent.

And he was saying, just so mad. He's like, why am I trying to provide them with this experience in nature when all they want is things that are available as store 24? Yeah. But I feel like that is, I mean, our kids are too young to appreciate a great food vacation now, right? I don't think. I think so. Well, I mean, I think it's the same thing. Like, you know, Taco Bell, McDonald, whatever it is, like that they don't get off of it.

No, but I mean like a good food. Like whereas you, oh, we went to Sicily. Like if you go to Sicily as adults, you eat amazingly. But I went to Sicily a few years ago with my kids, and I didn't get the sense that they were in awe of the freshness of the pasta. Yeah, the quality of the pasta. Yeah. No, they don't get it yet. My kid just want to get anywhere where they can get back to their iPads, which is like a whole.

Guys, I don't want to brag. What? You don't, you've never done it. We're holding the line impressively well with the iPads. Tell us. Do they not have them at all? They don't have their own. And I will say there one iPad time, and it's because my wife's not there, is we on Fridays during the school year, my wife and the baby will drive out of the city.

We have a place outside the city, and I will get on a train after the boys get out of school, and the three of us get on a train from Grand Central. It's about a two-hour train ride. And I will load things onto my iPad for them to watch. That is totally fair. Totally fair. And my wife is very frustrated with me because I will say when we fly, she will bring just a giant backpack full of activities. And as you well know, there's no activity to last more than seven minutes. Right.

So for a four-hour flight, it is. That's a lot. Nuts, how many things you have to do. That's a lot. And I will say to her, there's movies on the back of the chairs. Right. Just let them watch a movie on the back of that chair. Right.

And she won't cave. And it is. She's good. So do they not watch TV either? They don't watch TV, really. They watch, if it's pouring rain, they can watch a movie in the summer. Well, I, you know, my daughter, up until this year, she only got her iPad if we were on a plane. Because, as you know, it's a saving great way.

By the way, I'm with you. I would do the exact same thing. Yeah. I mean, until just a couple months ago, because all these kids are playing this Roblox. I don't even know if you've heard of it, but it's like a phenomenon. So she wants to do it because her friends are doing it and whatever. We've eased up during the summer. But I think it's great that you can do that.

I think it's awesome. You've held off. I mean, your oldest is seven. So that's mind-blowing. But I will say, flying is a lot easier. I will say, I mean, I also say to my wife because she's very judgmental about kids watching TV. And I have said, you know, TV paid for all of this. Right.

You know, before you look down your nose at the television industry, just know. Your husband has no other skills that he would get compensated for. So do the kids not have a concept that you're on TV? They know I have a show. Yeah. My oldest said a very sweet thing the other day. He said, when you die, do I get your show? Which I thought that was nice.

They do. They do know. And I will say, like, I feel like I'm in a very nice place because I'm on TV as myself and as my authentic self. So people in New York. who see me and watch the show feel like they know me, but they know me in a way that they like me. And so they're always very polite. And I think my kids are maybe getting a false sense

of what it's like to be in the public eye because most of my interactions are very positive. And also in New York, it's nice because I also think everyone in New York thinks they're also a little famous, so no one takes up too much of my time. I feel like they're not because they don't want to waste my time. they don't want to waste their time.

Right. Telling me they enjoy the shop. Wow. But they do have, when I hosted the Golden Globes, my son, my oldest, I think it was two. And the next morning I woke up and we were at a friend's house. And he was so excited because the nanny had let him watch the beginning of the Golden Globes. He just pulled me over to a TV that was not on anymore. But he just wanted to let me know that I had been there the previous night.

Oh. The physical, like the physical television. Right. He's like, you're not going to believe this. You were in there. You were there. You were there. In it. Do you guys watch TV?

We do. We have the very sad. We made a decision not to have a TV in our bedroom. And so instead we just watch an iPad in our bedroom, which is so much worse. Right? Like, why are we doing that? We could have just had a TV. That's not the mood.

Not the mood. And my, again, we're in it. As you guys have noted, we're in it. We're in it with the ages of our kids. So by the time we get in bed and there's a clock that starts with my wife, and we can probably watch about 10 minutes of something, then she falls asleep. And then I have to watch for another 10 minutes because if I turn it off too fast, she wakes up. Yep.

And then she can't fall asleep for another two hours. So I have to basically the second 10 minutes I watch where I'm just every minute I'm clicking the volume down one. So it just seems like the TV's not turning off. It's just getting farther away from me. Yeah, you're trying to sneak out of the room with this flipping baby. But then the other problem is then the next night, my 10 minutes with her is the 10 minutes I've already watched. So I'm always 20 minutes. I'm always 10 minutes ahead of her and it takes me two hours to finish a one hour show.

Sometimes she will get into a show and then she has no time for me to watch a show with her. So I have never seen the show Dawson's Creek, but I have listened to my work. wife watch it. I love it's Dawson's Creek. But it's really funny to listen to it

because I think I was just a little it was no judgment I think I was a little old when Dawson's Creek came out so I just sort of missed it.

Yeah. And she wasn't she watched it when it was on and it was during the pandemic where people were just going back to

comfort shows and it was driving her so crazy because I wasn't watching it I was just hearing Dawson's Creek sort of happened

next one pillow over and I was say wait what's he doing now? Wait, who's that? She's said, you either watch it or you don't. Right. But stop asking me uninformed Dawson's Creek's questions.

When we find a show we love together, it's very exciting because I think it's just nice as a couple to just both. You don't even have to be paying attention to each other, but just don't both be paying attention to the same thing at the same time. Right. It's almost closeness. Yeah. Yeah. It just takes so long. Like when my husband and I find a show that we both want to.

watch, I get a little irritated because I know I can't binge it. Right. Yeah. You know? Because then one of us falls asleep and then we have to catch up and then the other one. Like we've been watching Ozark for years. Yeah. I don't even know if it's been out for years.

I feel like we just finished something and now we're a little heartbroken, but I can't remember what it is. That's always the worst one you don't want to finish. Yeah. You don't want it to end. Was it the Kardashians? Oh, no. Succession.

Oh, succession. Like that was one. And it was like, we also would sort of force ourselves to stay up and watch it on Sunday night. That is still the really exciting thing about a show that comes out once a week. Because, you know, everybody you know will have watched it. And they might blow it for you. You have to stay off of all social media or anything because there's no safe place. And also, you guys, like, we can barely watch shows because we do, we're just having so much sex.

And it's just. So there's just no time. There's no time. There's no time. I think when you take like three kids, all the sex we're having, it's just when you say three kids, it automatically comes with a ton of sex. So that's just a ton of sex. Because by the way, we didn't have one every time we had sex.

There were a couple, at least twice it didn't happen. Yep. Twice it didn't work out. Oh my God. So I was thinking about when you're a kid, right, and you are on these trips with your family, I remember being older and looking back at pictures and realizing what I thought was my dad taking like the cutest picture of me in front of a donkey in the background

and realizing that the donkey had the hugest penis hanging out and the picture was actually of that with my five-year-old self. Oh, wait, you think your dad actually was just trying to take a donkey dick picture? Yeah. When you think of my dad, you think donkey dick. And do you think he wanted you in the first? photo as just sort of cover for the other people at the petting zoo? No, it was actually at my grandmother's ranch in Idaho.

She had donkeys and horses. And I think my brother and I are actually posed in front of this donkey. Listen, he easily could have angled the camera to block it. Yeah. But it is clearly what my dad was doing. And I'm not going to lie. I don't know if I was proud or traumatized when I saw it. Like, that's actually funny or it's just horrific.

I do sometimes think people will, as they work through. a trauma will try to convince themselves they're just proud of. They're just proud of someone. I'm so proud of my dad for posing me with donkey dicks. I mean, honestly, though, innocent little children. I mean, I'm like five my brother's age or whatever he was. And, you know, it's just really special. I mean, again, I think the funniest thing about looking at, I, the art for our podcast is

a family photo of Josh and I. But you realize how many more pictures I've taken of my children. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Even when you have perfect, again, a perfect camera in perfect conditions. My daughter was in a cute sun hat and flip flops yesterday. And I took 20 photos and one, maybe one is okay. And if it was a Kodak film, I would take one shot at it. And that would have been that. That would have been the picture. Right. You only got one shot. M&M. I don't think they get the life they're living in. I say that to them all the time. I'm like, you guys have no idea. Well, that's what I said about going back to the 80s.

I will say they have it so good, but I do feel like they can counter by saying all things being equal, I would happily have a Kodak camera and less global warming. I think they would maybe say they don't have it that good. Right. That's what they're all thinking. They were like, thanks for the iPhones, but also the oceans are too hot. And I put that on you guys. And I'd rather not hear how good I have it. I mean, by the way, like, it's, for example, I don't feel like I didn't see enough Disney movies as a kid.

We have Disney Plus on the days they're allowed to see a movie. But like when I look back to my life 40 years ago, I feel like I saw all the Disney movies exactly as many times as I wanted to see him. Yeah. And the oceans weren't as hot. So I will highlight it. Yeah. Did you watch a time? Were you allowed to?

Yeah. Oh, yeah, as a kid. We were plopped in front of the TV and it was the best. But what do you say about that? because the truth is you're not the only comedian that I've spoken to that that was their upbringing was tons and tons of TV. And I'm like, you guys are fucking hilarious and successful and have really made something based on absorbing all of that, right? I'm worried about that. That's one of the things because I do feel, and my parents especially, I almost never, because even, you know, those Disney movies of the 70s, but that wasn't a huge.

part of it. My parents just let us watch things for adults. We hardly ever watched comedy that was written for children, save for like those very early kids movies. And I always say to my wife, like you can't, kids can't figure out how to be funny being around kids. Like they'll come home. Right. They'll have the worst sense of humor if the kid who's two months older than them, who has three older brothers, teaches them what's funny. Right. So I'm like, we got to get out in front. We got to let them watch Cheers. That's what I'm saying. I was going to ask, So what were the adult things you were watching as a kid? Well, that was, yeah, like Cheers or Taxi or Monty Python, S&L.

You know, my dad would go to the video store and every Steve Martin movie. He used to listen to Richard Pryor. Amazing. Cassettes in the car. Now, obviously, that's going to be a problem for the kids. There's some language issues that fundamentally don't quite work now. But it's a bummer because it's so weird, especially when you think about Richard Pryor, when I would listen to those things, I, one, knew they were deeply funny.

I, too, knew he was using words that I should, in no circumstances, ever use. Yeah, right. And didn't. So it's that funny thing of having less confidence in your children than your parents had new. Yeah. Maybe it's that you have more fear of the consequences in this day and age. I would say. I also think our parents had less options, right?

It would have been one TV for the family versus kids could go in another room and watch something or put on something for the kids. You had to watch what was on at 8 o'clock on a Friday night, and that was that. Which is why it makes sense that a billion people watched a show like the Cosby show, which was digestible for all ages. Yeah, Cheers was my favorite show growing up. Cheers was the best, and I'm in a name drop. Just because it's a deeply important thing to me, I have had the pleasure of getting to know Ted Danson. And he is, have you ever met him?

No, but I know people that know him well. He's just the best human being. And I said to him, the first night we spent enough time together that I could clock he was the best human being. I said, you know, this was so important to me. Like this would have been unbearable. Yeah. To me, if you were not, if you had been a bad person,

And if he had been an average person, it would have been fine. It's a bonus that he was a great person. But if he had been a bad person, it just would have been heartbreak. Heartbreaking. That's why I never want to meet Larry David because if he disappoints me, I'll be crushed. You'd be fine. I'd be fine. I know.

There's a different thing because with Larry, if he's a little bit mean to you, it also is kind of good. It's also Larry. Yeah, that's what I was going to say. It plays into it. It does. Yeah. It does. My wife used to babysit Larry's kids.

What? Yeah. that's pretty cool. So we have a, I have a little bit of a buffer because my wife made sure no ill befell his children for a couple of years. I figured that's probably pretty important. You've got to like me. I think that just doing that for so long and seeing so many people and then obviously

your talk show and talking to so many people, you must have had so many experiences with surprising, disappointing, all of the above. It's interesting, especially now, you know, having our own podcast. There's something you guys have figured out. And I know you've been on talk shows, Rachel. And like, the reality about those is it's not a lot of time. Right. And so it's lovely for me as a host.

I get to go backstage. I probably talk to the guest as much backstage as on camera. And that's really lovely. You feel like you're getting a chance to say hello. But, you know, oftentimes there's as there should be. There's, you know, people from their team backstage. It's not just the two of you. And then when it is the two of you, you're in front of an audience.

And so it's a little bit. a performance of a conversation. So with the podcast, you feel like you really know a person. And so that's nicer because I think I'm pretty good at it, but I also am ashamed to say there's a chance I could run into someone and forget if they had been on my show or if I had, you know, just because you do so many. I mean, I've done, you know, I think I probably, you know, 1,500 times, you know, at some way you're like, 3,000 deep.

Right. I'm going to come on your show and you're going to be like, nice to meet you. Hi, so good to meet you. Well, let me ask you as a host of your late night show, do you prefer or do you like when the guest is prepared and they're like, I have this story to tell and this joke and I'm going to land this. Do you prefer that or do you like it to be more natural? That's such a good question. I love that there's different kinds of guests.

And I think the longer I've done it, the more I've realized my job is just to, try as quickly as possible over the course of the interview to figure out which kind of guess it is and then get out of the way or become very present because that's what and carry it that guest would like carry it I feel like I almost never carry it because I love it when somebody shows up with the confidence to just not have when people say a lot of people say it and I feel like half of them mean it which is yeah I'll do anything I'll talk about anything and then you realize some people panic because they realize just doing anything isn't going as well as I thought away.

And then they sort of maybe fall back on a story they told the previous week on a different talk show. Right. But then there's other people like, you know, Nathan Lane or Martin Short, they show up in a very old school way with just 100 one-liners. And it's amazing. You are just there to be an audience. And it's so joyous. And the audience loves it

because they realize what their role is as well. Yeah. And I think one of the reasons it doesn't get boring is that surprise every night of getting, you know, the longer you do the show, obviously you have repeat guests. And so the joy of surprise is replaced by the joy of knowing what you're getting.

And obviously you only have back the ones you want to talk to more. But yeah, it's never the same, which is really wonderful. Yeah. It's funny. Some people just play out. The minute you ask them a question, they just turn to the audience. They're show people. Other people just look at you and have this incredible ability to act like the audience isn't there. And it's so fun in real time to figure out which one you're dealing with. Oh, wow. It's so fun. I love the live aspect of it. I did a lot of theater. It reminds me of that feeling where you just don't ever really know what you're going to get, right? Yeah. Even the audience. I go out every night and do just. a very boilerplate intro hello to the audience before the show starts. And there are three

fine jokes, but I say them the same way every night, almost just to internally set my level of knowing what I've got. Yeah. Because I'd rather know then, because sometimes you go out, again, same three jokes, same delivery, and they're quiet, and you realize they're not, having a bad time. They don't hate being here. They're just a little quiet. And I like knowing that before the show starts. So the audience is not seeing in real time as my face slowly falls over the course of a month. Broad Ideas is supported by Mosh. I think it's so important to be on top of your mental game. Whether at the gym, on the go, or in between meals with the fan, Mosh protein bars are the smart snack to keep your brain and body fit, fueled, and feeling good. With six delicious

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That's 20% off plus free shipping on your first six count trial pack, which includes all six mouthwatering flavors at m-o-sh-l-I-F-E dot com slash ideas. It's so funny because I had an ex-boyfriend that put it in my head that I had to have an episode. epic story prepared for when I go out on a talk show. And it's fucked me for life because now I'm like in my head the whole time and thinking I have to come up with something like the funniest thing ever. It's not. Look, if you have an epic story, a talk show is a great thing to say before. But if you don't have one, you can't make one up. And you can't make a fine story become epic in the telling. But I will say, I used to keep like a folder on my desktop of things. that I thought would be good talks about stories, especially for when I did David Letterman.

And the first time I did David Letterman, I was dating my wife and her dad had a pet goat. And I told a story about walking the pet goat on the beach. And then the next time I did Letterman, the segment producer said, Dave would love to hear more about the goat. And in that moment, I realized, oh, I'm going to have to fucking marry this woman. Because I'm going to need these goat stories. I don't know where else I'm going to get them. The odds that my next girlfriend is going to have a goat are probably almost zero. if not, it's a girl.

Oh my God, that's amazing. Dating in Manhattan. I mean, I'm sure they're parts of the country. Manhattan. Everyone's second girlfriend is a goat owner. Oh, my God. That's amazing. And that goat, that go, rest in peace.

Raisin no longer with us. Oh, Raisin. But Raisin brought so much. Raisin brought so much joy to me, my wife, and to the audience at a dance a woman theater. Oh, my God. I did Letterman once. And it was like probably one of my proudest moments because, I guess I called him out on something.

And everyone was like, oh my God, you called Letterman out. And he laughed. He appreciated it. Yeah, yeah. And it was a good experience. But that was, oh, my God,

that was so long ago. That is, I've known so many people who have a version of that, which is being on Letterman and having that moment where they, for a slight second,

took the power. And you realize also how much he loved it. I had him on my shirt. show, I guess two February's back was the 40th anniversary of late night, the, you know, franchise, as you would say. And we invited him for the anniversary. And I know the last thing he wants is you to spend the time talking about how great he is or how much he meant to you. He's not built to absorb that love or praise. And so it was the weirdest thing of wanting to

share how much somebody meant to you, but knowing they wouldn't take any joy in hearing it. So then you realize, oh, you're just doing it for yourself. So then it's selfish. And so then the place you have to get is, all right, you just got to go out. You just have a genuine conversation with David Letterman. You have to forget he's your hero.

You have to forget that this show wouldn't exist if it wasn't for you. It's so funny how sometimes it's so hard to do what you would do with a friend, but you realize that's how certain people want to be treat it, which is just, oh, I don't want to. Sometimes it's uncomfortable, right? Sometimes. And David Letterman, it's like he's not, he's not warm and fuzzy, but he is.

Like, you can see it inside of him. Yes. I think he's certainly now more than ever is realizing the benefits of being more open-hearted and less cynical. You see it now. Yeah. When people outgrow the comedy of cynic. Because I don't know if he was ever genuinely as cynical as he came across, but it certainly was very funny.

And there was a definite split. Like you were either Letterman or Leno, you know, for a long time there. And I would be like, of course you go Letterman. Letterman is home to me. He's like everyone I've ever loved in a human. He's the goat, huh? Yeah, 100%. What I was going to ask you is do, do you find a difference between doing the podcast?

Because this is so different. People are always like, what do you do to interpret? I'm like, we don't really interview. We just talk to people, which is completely different than an interview. Yes. There is, as much as you want to be genuine and in the moment, a lot of work goes into a talk show interview. And that's from researchers up to segment producers and then ultimately what all of those people and myself decide will be the approach to an interview. And again, just you don't want to approach it with we'll find it in the moment because the moment's so much shorter than a podcast. Completely. And so a lot goes into it. And then, you know, that's why we just wanted a tiny hook to hang the podcast on with family trips.

But in the end, you know, it just gives us so much room to, especially since we're talking about people's youth and their siblings and their parents. So much of that then leads to a natural conversation about career. and the level of support, you know, how weird your parents thought it was when you did what it was you ended up doing. But do you feel the intimacy in that more? Like, is it very different for you? Very much. I do. I mean, with that said, I should know everybody at this point has been someone I've either had on the show or who's hosted as an L. So it'll be interesting when we get to a place where it's the first time I talk to somebody as the podcast. Right. Right. Yeah. I think.

it's an awesome approach. How many of you guys, this is, have you been, you're over a year? We're over a year, yeah. Still together. We're still here. Going strong. Hanging on by a thread. Oh. Yeah. Opposite. Well, the other, I mean, you know, this has just been such a nice conversation and I hate to take anything away after those stories because they were so, they're so incredible. We had like, you know, your holy shit dad moments, if there's any of those you want to throw out there before we wrap it up. I mean, the one that we keep talking about in the podcast is checking into a hotel in Florida. My dad hit his shin on a coffee table. And then cursed really loudly and raised his fist as though he was going to engage in a fight with the coffee table loudly.

And a lot of heads turned. and we're still working through the trauma of that, my brother and I. So not proud. It's trauma. You know, I'm a little proud. I'm proud of him. He stood up for himself. He did stand up for himself against that comedy table.

And you know what? My mom, we have a really good picture of the moment. And in the background, there's just a horse with the biggest dick. Yeah. Proud. Just a lot of, just all proud. Across the board. We're all going to go back to our family pictures and notice that.

And look for it. I didn't realize the buffalo in the back of this picture, really was... I'm telling you guys. I'm going to find that photo. I'm going to show it to you both. You're going to see what I'm talking about. Yeah, put it in the show notes, right? Yeah, in the show notes, exactly.

You should post it. I'm just a promoter episode. I'm posting the picture of the donkey dick. You're welcome. Seth, it was so nice to meet you and talk to you. So nice to meet you guys both. Thanks so much for having me on. This was a delight.

It was. Absolutely. Thank you. Yeah. So much fun. Oh, wait. I had one more thing. We just wanted to know.

What are the worst things you can ask as an interviewer? Oh. You know, like just don't ask this because everybody asks it. It's boring. Nobody cares. Well, I will tell you, this is a, I'm going to give you a genuine non-joke answer. Like one thing we're very careful about, you know, when you're talking to people about their families. Like, no.

what the deal is with everybody in the family. Don't put someone in a position of giving you some very bad news that happened maybe a long time ago. Right. That makes sense. Yeah. That's smart. So don't just say like,

so tell me about your dad. And then they're sitting there and they're like, well, he's doing 13 years. And how's mom now? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Okay. That's a great piece of advice. And you guys did a bit. You guys had a chance to do that with Raisin and you didn't. You let me tell you. Yes. Correct. I appreciated that.

Yeah. Correct. Neither of you were like, oh, raisin, what's raisin up to? You're like, and I have a picture of raisin in the background. No. Yeah. Raisin surprisingly, nothing to brag about. Maybe, I think goats are, there's a reason nobody ever says, oh, big old goat dick. Donkey. It's donkey. It's donkey only, donkey. Donkey takes the day.

Oh, my God. Oh, this was so much fun. Thanks, guys. Hey, guys. Let's do a post, y'all. It's been a while. It's been months. Shut up. You left us for a long time. Are you feeling any better now that she's back?

Are you still mad at her? Are we fighting? Are you mad at me? Wait, I can't tell. I can't see her eyes. Yes, you can't. Olivia has her transitional's on. You guys.

Her transitional glasses on. We have windows in this room with sun coming in. So she's about 30% tinted right now. You know who's always about 30% tinted? You? Johnny Depp, okay? He wears transitional? He sure does.

So does Robert Downey Jr. Is he, how old is Johnny Depp? Yeah, I don't. I'm just saying. I'm just saying there's some really cool cats out there. The guy that dresses like a pirate wears transitional hensens. Guys, it's really a great feeling to be in your car. You get outside, you walk, sunglasses.

Then you walk into the store, no sunglasses. So I was at her house the other day. She started outside. You went to her house for the first time? I did. For the first time. Since she moved back. The new one that she bought?

Uh-uh. New one? She bought a new house? Oh, right. The one that, yes, right. I'm with you. I'm there. We were outside and we walked inside

But Olivia's glasses were still outside What's the transition time on this when you get inside? I don't even know You don't notice? I just like kind of go with the flow It's just a smooth transition Is it? Yeah, it's still going.

No, it's not. Yeah, it is. Is it? Well, you do have sunlight on you. Yeah, how does that work if you're in a sunny room? Yes. I have a feeling it's. It's Briar.

You guys can talk transitional one. Did you notice my hair's light? It was too distracted by the transitional glasses. Okay, so how do you feel about the round glasses? I like them. The glasses are nice. Okay, good. It's just the lines, darkness.

So guess what? I got tucked into another pair. By the same lady? Nope. I went to Costco and I got my ray bands made into glasses. like just whatever. And I was like, I got talked into transitional lenses and then my friends were making fun of me.

And the Costco worker was like, no, those are really cool. You should get another pair? He was like, I would never not get transitional lenses because why would you want your eyes to suffer and go outside and not have it adjusts to the light you're in? And I got them transition. You are such a mark, apparently.

I am a mark. I can't believe you bought another pair. I bought another pair. Oh, boy. You know what, though? Our audience is very supportive of it. They send me little memes. You'll see.

It's going to be the hot new trend. How are you doing? Good. Good. What's up? That much. I'm asking him what's up. What's up?

It's about nothing. He was living the dream. His family went out of town. I had no kids last week. How was that? It was good. Yeah, it was great. Yeah, it's awesome.

Let's just be honest. I say it until 2 a.m. Yeah, why? I was raging. Doing what? Well, local natives did two nights at the Ford Theater. Of course, he had to go to both. So I went to both.

And they did like a little bar hangout after the last night at the Gold Line in Pasadena. Oh. Or Highland Park. And then my friend from Chicago was randomly going there. So I saw him and seen him in a couple of years. And then I saw him three nights in a row. He also went to a movie with our friend. Yep, me and James and went to see all.

Benheimer. I want to see Barbie. Me too. Rob wants to see Barbie. No. I think this weekend I'm going to see the last voyage of the Demeter. It's like Norwegian Dracula. Of course you are, Rob. Dracula's Lost at Sea movie. With Natalie? She watched the trailer and thinks it's going to be too scary. Oh, for her? Yeah, she doesn't like scary movies. Oh. She doesn't like scary movies at all?

No. Like she won't do them? She gets like mad if I put them on. Because she just gets too scared? I guess. Yeah. I would imagine. Because I want to see.

No, because she gets turned on. I want to see talk to me also. Yeah. Have you seen that? That's the new 824? Yeah, no, I know. I want to see it. I haven't seen it.

Well, we'll go tomorrow night. It's so late. You can be out anyways. You might as well take advantage of it. It's like a 10 o'clock showing. That's insane. That's insane. I don't think you understand.

I've had too much freedom this last. Yeah, you have. I've actually been staying up pretty late, to be honest. Oh, yeah? What are you been doing? Partying. Doing what? Just staying up.

Right now I'm currently watching how to become a cult leader. What is that? It's on me. Oh, love it. And of course you do. Yeah. I'm working my practice. I'm becoming a cult later. You have a cult. And all your friends follow. We had a culty experience the other night. Oh, yeah. Right? Yeah, sure. I was pretty culty. Yeah, share what it was. On August 8th. You, I don't know. You tell me what you, what do you think it was? I don't know. It was like a day. like a real spiritual day where like a portal is open. Right? Yeah. A lion's gate?

Yes. Uh-huh. Where it was a good day for manifesting and all of that. Yep. That the veil is the thinest. Right. What veil? The veil between us and spirit.

So on 8-8 is supposed to be like the peak of the lion's gate portal where it's like the most powerful day to manifest. So. What was the eighth? That was Tuesday. Trying to think if I manifested anything on Tuesday. 308. What was?

What happened? I've got to the point where... He's into it. No. That's not what I was going to say he has to look. I have to look at my calendar. Otherwise, I have no idea what I did. When someone's like, I was your weekend, I have to pull my calendar up and be like,

oh, yeah, I did this. No idea. Yeah, nothing manifested on Tuesday for. me. Well, you didn't know. Yeah. Well, we had people at my house to manifest. You had like a witch? We had a sound bath. A seance. A sound bath. Briar had her, did her first sound bath. How many people? Maybe like 15 or so? 15 or so. It started really casual. It was me and my friend Matt talking about like the Lionsgate portal and it's like a strong day to manifest. And he's like, why don't we do that at your house and just have some of the girls over?

And I was like, okay, sounds good. And then it grew. It grew. And then Jeff was like, do you guys want a sound bath? And we're like, duh, obviously. And so his friend Eric Melgren came over from the middle branch. That's his company. And he did a sound bath.

But here's why it was really culty. Because we all laid on the floor. We moved to the furniture. There's like 15 people laying on the floor. And Rachel stood in the middle and everyone bowed to her. No, Breyer and I were on the couch. Breyer was laying on top of her mom. She was.

She was laying on me. That's what made it really culty. It was like, it's like, you don't. Exactly. It's like we're real Waco vibes. Exactly. Especially because I'm like watching that show and then we're all laying on the floor with the kids and it's like, you know. I could see if you.

you just walked into that, you'd be like, what the fuck? What the fuck? And then our friend Jennifer did like a grounding. And she was actually really good at it. Yeah. There was some words that didn't know what she meant because she goes really into like, and your brouha magic. And I'm like that.

I knew what she meant. You did? What is brouha mean? Twitch in Spanish. Oh, super cool. And the sound bath guy was just like hanging out. The sound bath guy was really good. He was rad.

He came over and he's friends with Jeff and he was just like, chill, did it. He was. All of a sudden I hear like a conversation going in depth about the sound bath and I walk in and it's Breyer and Eric like just, she's like, yeah. Because like sometimes at night I put on a sound bath like YouTube video for her to fall asleep to because it's like a night light and it's soothing. So she's like talking to them. She's like, yeah, fall asleep to sound bath every night, you know?

Like just like talking. I was dying. It was so cute. But yeah, so she laid, she wanted to do it. So she was like laying on top of me, but like every two minutes she'd be like, how much longer? It was so cute. Did you feel different after doing it? Did you feel like relaxed doing it? Was it hard for you to stay present?

You know what? So that particular day, the night before I took Briar to her first concert, which was the Taylor Swift. Who? And she. We were out so late, didn't get that much sleep. So I was very disoriented. And we had just come back from traveling for a month. Did you stay for the whole three and a half a set?

No. Uh-uh. We left early. Briar's friend, Ariya, like, danced her ass off to, I knew you were traveling. You know, she was like feeling it. And then she just turned around sat in her seat and passed out. Like, sitting up, sitting up mouth wide, like, just out. And everyone was like, oh, my gosh. like it was so sweet.

And the people around us were like laughing because it was so cute, you know. And she was out. And Breyer wanted to stay till the end, but her two friends were just done. So we left early year. Was she mad about that? Briar was mad, yeah. Was she mad? Oh, yeah.

Yeah. And last night we were with my family. And my brother and my stepdad both were like, what? Did you stay till the end in the last song? And Briar was like, I wanted to. But, you know, and I was like, you guys, cut it out. I was like, please stop talking. talking about.

How was Heim? You know, we got there towards the end of their set. They were so great. And they came out in the concert. They played another number with Taylor. How cool. It was so rad. Did you see Alana?

I was like, Alana. No. I wish. I would have been like, anyway. Yeah. I mean, the concert was amazing. Taylor is fucking just. I can't even.

I just bow down. You know? Like, that is, she is, I'm obsessed. And, you know, all these friendship bracelets they have at the concert. I now have, like, a bracelet factory in my kitchen. I don't know if you saw it. I can't stop making bracelets. Anyway, it was a really cool experience, except that was Breyer's first concert.

And I'm like, well, where do you go from here? Yeah, you ruined it. It was worth it. Well, you know what else is impressive about Taylor is how much she donate. I know. It's unbelievable. I know. It's so.

Well, she's making. She's also making so much. She is. She is. A million a night. It's so crazy. She's making me something crazy. Well, it's 70,000 people.

People. Very expensive. Like, just merch is like $2 million a night. Probably. I wonder what that feels like to be, like, she's to produce that much money. She's like the number one. Yeah, it was the biggest tour of all time, I think.

Yeah. That's so cool. That's so cool, though. It's really cool. And she's a fucking, that's what I was like. For my daughter to see this, I think it's so rad because it's the one woman, you know, she writes her own shit. Like she's really talented and does it and like look what she's done.

And I'm like, if anything, it's the most inspiring thing I've ever seen. Absolutely. You know? And for my daughter to be, when she came out, I have a video. I have chills right now. Just seeing it through my daughter's eyes and like how excited she got, it was just the best thing ever. I mean, I'll have that forever, just that memory. And it was so cool. And even the car yesterday, I was like, was this the first song? Taylor sang? She's like, no, mom. The first song was

when, and she sang, Miss Americana and da-da-da-da, like she retained it all. You know? It's a big deal. It's a big deal. Life-changing your first concert. So that's why when I was a different day for me, like I was so out of sorts. My nervous system, like everything is still so out of whack from traveling from unstraight, going from place to place, living out of a suitcase, essentially, to Taylor Swift to the cult What happened before the cult got there?

Oh! My little godson Shepherd is potty training. You should poop somewhere? Did he poop somewhere? Or did he poop everywhere? There was just a trail of shit

from outside to inside to the potty everywhere. This dude is. was just free flowing. It was unbelievable. It was like literally, it was insane. Because he had been backed up for five days because we're potty trained in it.

So he doesn't want to go. So he won't go to the bathroom. And so it was like five days worth of poop. And we put this like sprinkler thing on for the kids to play in like a water thing. Like a splash pad thing. Yeah. And so it was all wet outside and he pooped like maybe five times outside. And then then he, I have.

had to hose him off. So I had to hose him off and like literally hosing his bum, you know. So now he wants he wants to be hosed off after he's got to get him a bidet. I'm going to. Because and when you hose it, he goes, oh. So last night he was asking to be hosed before he poop. And I'm like, no, no, no, no. This isn't like a thing. You have to poop first. So then I host him again. He loves it. So now he's like addicted to being... Put him in the backyard and blast him?

Yeah. That's exactly what I do. Can you get like a little bidet thing you put in the toilet? Yeah. Yeah. I'm going to get one. That's hilarious. But literally it was like when like a dog is diarrhea and can't control themselves.

And it's just like it's really shit everywhere. Yeah. A little ship. And he was just like, oh my God. It was. But it was also chaos. Because then you got strawberry. The dog.

The dog. Just going apes shit, like all over the place. Shepard's straight wailing on Elliot. Like, M.M.A. I know. I know. It's very alarming when you see it. And Elliot's like laughing, though.

You know. But it was just like, there's shit everywhere. There's M.MA fighting going on. There's strawberry just like jumping up and like trying to get briars on the scooter. And strawberry is trying to attack the scooter while Bryers ride. It was just like utter chaos. cut to sound bath. It was like there was just a lot going.

It was a lot of energy. Oh my God. There was a lot of energy. Yeah. The sound bath I did feel, though, helped like regulate. I can feel it doing something to my nervous system. Yeah. Like, have you ever been to one?

Nope. Let's do it. Let's go to the Integratron in the desert. Yeah. Let's take Rob. Let's take Rob and record it. We can't record during the sound bath probably. You might be able to ask them.

That would be amazing Making Rob do his first sound bath Let's do it I love it I think it would have been For me because like Breyer kept You know Was just talking to me

The whole thing Leah's not great at a sound bath either What was she doing? Because like Breyer's like Mom I'm thirsty And she wants to get water She goes to get her sweatshirt I'm just full volume

Yeah She's like not super down But anyway I dig it I got a massage last week Oh So you could do a sound bath If you do a massage

Like you like massages So this lady like climbed on my back. I was not, I don't know. You picture Rob like, uh. It was like right, I was a 90 minute one. And like right away she climbed up. Right away from the get. Did a time massage? No. Where were you?

A place in Silver Lake. Oh, you went somewhere. It wasn't someone that came to your house. But it was like a proper, like what kind of massage? Swedish. It was supposed to be Swedish massage. But then I, she climbed up and I was like, did I sign up for the wrong one? or they have to be down to the wrong one. I've got 90 minutes of this happening. Oh, my God, it's so amazing. That's so good.

Because Ty, they do that. They climb on top of you and they'll like pull you and, oh my God. I'm very glad that I didn't accidentally sign up for that. Oh, I love it. Oh, Rob. I love that Roth was just like a massage. Wait, why is this lady climbing on me? She had her, like, knees on my butt cheeks.

Oh, my God. That's good stuff. Did it take you out of the massage? A little, I mean, she stops. It was like just at the beginning and then she climbed down. I don't know if she could tell I was tense or uncomfortable. Oh, did you have underwear on? Mm-hmm.

Oh. Do you always take your underwear off? Yeah. Always? I think, and sometimes I think I leave them on. I think it's, I don't know. You leave bottoms on. Well, I mean, like I wear, I don't wear full butt underwear,

so I feel like if they need to get in there, they still can. But, like, my vagina is protected from. Dirty sheets. I'm so weird. Oh. I mean, I think it depends on who? Maybe. It depends on where and what. Yeah. How do you feel about a male versus female?

I like male. I knew you did because you like the pressure. I like it rough. I like a woman. I mean, hard. Sorry. Whoa. I like it. You're me today.

Yeah, I know. Gee. They're canceled. I like to be thrown around. I'm going to lose my job. like the man-handled massage. I do, though. Yeah.

I like it. I know men that prefer a male masseuse just for the pressure alone and like, who can like really. Who do you prefer? A female massage. Oh. Would you be okay with a male giving you a massage? I would be fine with it, but I... You don't prefer it?

No. Don't prefer it. Okay. I remember my first massage. Yeah. And it was my brother-in-law is... a boxer, right? And so he took me to his masseuse.

So he's like, you've never had a massage? And I was like, no, he's like, okay, I'm going to get you a massage. So we all went, and it was at this guy's house, and it was like in a room at his house. I'd never had one. And the guy's, like, massaging me, and he's like, oh, like breathing and, like, massaging my butt. And I was like, I'm paying someone to do this? Oh, no.

Like, I should be paid. Oh, no. You know? To let this heavy breather. Yeah. To let this guy rub lotion on my butt. Oh, no. You know?

And I was like, I don't think I like massages. Like, that creeped me out. Well, yeah. That would creep me out, too. And it was like hot and it was like in Van Eyes. It was like in someone's. Yeah. And I was like, I don't think I'm into massages.

It felt really creepy to paste. someone to rub motion on my butt. That is very uncomfortable. Yeah, I didn't like it. I would not like it. I almost threw up after a massage because it was so intense. Like, I was very sick because... Why?

We were in Thailand, and it was the most intense massage I've ever had in my life. And I don't like a lot of pressure. So you can imagine, like, this woman really went to town, and I almost threw up. Like, it was that painful. Were you not drinking a lot of water? No, it was because it was so painful. Yeah, we've talked about this. like, do you tell them?

Right. I know that's so I'm a, you know, like people please it, whatever. So it's hard to speak up. I can't. I would have told her to get off if I was comfortable. But you couldn't because you're the same. I know. Like, it's hard to tell people.

Like, you know. It is. I know. But I know people have no problem with it. They'll be like, can you get off? Or like, right. Less pressure. I'm always like, no, it's great.

Here's an example. I was a kid in like fourth grade. and the mom was curling my hair for like a talent show. And it was burning my ear. And I didn't say anything. Like I didn't say anything. And I had a blister on my ear after. She finally noticed was like, oh my God, you know?

And I was like, it's fine. Oh, no, it's not fine. And I had a huge blister bubble from the burn. Because I was too shy to say anything. That breaks my heart. What's wrong with me? Nothing. You were just too caring.

It was, you know, that's just a perfect example when I can't speak up. It's fine. Yeah. It's fine. It's totally fine. I lost my ear, but it's fine. It's not fine. Oh, my God.

Yeah. Is Breyer like that? She's much better, I think, at speaking up. Like, she'll be like, it's fine, but like she'll also communicate with people, you know, or like, no, I don't want to do that. And I'm like, that's great. I could not do that when I was her age, for sure. She's pretty good.

That's good. Yeah. We'll see. We will. We shall see. We will see. Yeah. You guys getting ready for school to start again?

Fuck. Monday. Monday? What is that? The 14th? Yeah. Yeah. Go back Monday.

That's when Shepard's supposed to go back. Supposed to? Well, yeah. But you're not going to... Not until Elliot goes back? We're probably going to not start him until the next week. Are you allowed to do that? It's TK.

Okay. It's not like... And it's not the school he's going to end up in. It's like a whole thing, guys. She's in a whole thing. Whole thing. Probably not TK. But they take missing school very seriously.

I didn't realize. Because like when Calvin started kindergarten was when we all had COVID. Oh. And we weren't sure if he had it or not. And I think Natalie still had it. And we were like, all right, we're not going to have him go to the first day. Right. And got like all these calls.

Oh, yeah. They were like, no, you need to send him unless he's got a positive test. And we're like, but he's been around three people that just had it. Right. Huh. And they were like, nope. School. Oh, boy.

All right. So what are we doing this Cracker Barrel Soundbath trip? Cracker Barrel is on the way out to the day. Desert! This is perfect, you guys. Okay. Cracker Barrel's down bath. Those often go together. Pick a weekend. I guess we're doing it. We're doing it. I'm so excited. Are you going to do it really? Yeah, I'll do it. Can we get that one house? The house with the mirrors and the pool. It's for sale right now. It's called something. Let's stay there. Okay, Rob, you pay for it. All right. We'll split it. No. Oh, my God. I feel that we have really covered a lot.

Yeah, do you? Yes. And it has been lovely chatting and hopefully come back next week. Bye. That was a HeadGum podcast.