Broad Ideas with Rachel Bilson & Olivia Allen - Wilson Bethel on Selfishness, Fear, and Getting Fired from The O.C.

Episode Date: December 18, 2023

Wilson Bethel talks with Rachel and Olivia about parenting, not feeling fear, and selfishness. They also discuss Rachel’s rap performance that Wilson produced, Rachel and Wilson’s time together on Hart of Dixie, and how Wilson was fired from The O.C.Broad Ideas is supported by Quince. Go to Quince.com/ideas for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns.Broad Ideas is supported by Blissy. Get better sleep now with Blissy and use code RACHEL to get an additional 30% off at blissy.com/RACHEL.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hax is back for its fifth and final season, and so is The Hacks podcast. Join the Hacks creators and showrunners, Lucia and Yellow, Paul W. Downs, and Jen Statsky as they unpack the Emmy-winning comedy series. On each episode, here's stories from the set, what goes on in the writer's room, and how these beloved characters close out their final season. Watch Hax streaming exclusively on HBO Max and listen to The Hacks podcast on HBO Max, or wherever you get your podcasts. Welcome to Broad Ideas.

It's our last episode of the year. It's our last episode of the year. Now, you all may notice there is a void. Yeah, Steve left. Is his name? That was his name. Yeah, Steve, we got an exorcist to come and forcibly remove Steve from Rachel's house. Rob is full of the jokes today.

No, Olivia is not here because Shepard is sick and they cannot be here. They, not like Shepherds here, but Olivia. Sometimes. Sometimes Shepard's here. She's here for the interview. She's here for the interview. She's not here for... She's going to come real quick because Wilson's about to walk in and then...

She's not here for this or after. Yes, but Wilson to Wilson Bethel. A dear friend of mine, actually, one of his first jobs, if not his first job, he says it in the interview, so you guys can tell me, was on the OC. Who didn't he play on the OC? He was like, you know, like... Guy number four at party? No, he and I were like at the kissing booth together and he was like a jock or something. I don't know.

But it's kind of funny. That was like his first job. And then he and I went on to work on Harda Dixie together. He was my love interest. And I love him dearly. And he came to talk to us today, and I hope everybody enjoys the conversation. Let's welcome Wilson. Sometimes when the work inside of Rachel's little brain, all these thoughts are swirling, round and round inside to join us on this journey as we take a little ride.

We'll talk about dogs and kids and things. We'll talk about chicks and tampon strings. We'll talk about boys that I need you. Because people die. Now I have chicken fries in my head, Casper. Do you have what? I like my chicken fed. How do you feel about country music?

Do you know, yeah. How do you feel about country music? We're recording everywhere, yes? I don't, I'm, I think I'm in, I'm not, I don't know enough about it. Good. To, to have an opinion. I like, I like some old country music. Mm-hmm.

Like what? I mean like Patsy Klein and like Hank Will, you know, Hank Williams. Johnny Cash. I don't know Johnny. Honestly, I don't know Johnny Cash that much. But you would know, like, if Walk the Line came on. Yeah, yeah, of course. But, and then like there's like, I really like Towns Van Zantle up, but he's not really kind of like,

and he's more like singer song. You're like a really like Motley crew. Yeah, exactly. So like, I'm really into country music. But yeah, I don't know, I don't know, and especially like contemporary country. I don't know. I have like a weird relationship to it because my mom loved country music when I was like post-divorce, like when I was a kid. That's what was getting her through?

Yeah, exactly. Yeah. And she would like wake us up with it. She would like, she would like start black. And my mom wakes up. My mom wakes up at like 4.30 in the morning. Whoa. And, I mean, she wouldn't start at 4.30, but she would start playing, like, who are her go-to?

She's like Randy Travis a lot. She likes, she loves music. Yeah. She doesn't, I don't think she listens to it anymore. It was like a post-divorce phase that was extremely potent for probably like a, like, seven or eight years of, of my, child of, but she really was aggressive about it. We had a, we had a, I mean, this is full truth, we had a life-size Dolly Parton cut out in her dining room for like five years, like a cardboard cut out. Did you have to like pray to her or like? We might as well. Yeah. I mean, she was like,

she was like my mom's lesbian lover basically in the house because she, everything else was idolized. Speaking of lesbian lover cut out, do you remember when you? Oh, okay. Remember when you had a life-size cut out of Ellen? Oh. Ellen? I had Britney Spears. You had Ellen.

I don't remember Ellen. Ellen DeGeneres. Gave you one of her. Who did? Ellen Degenerance. Gave me a life-size cut out of her? Yes. I have no recollection of this.

Wow. I definitely had Britney Spears, Circa, Pepsi commercial cut out. And did Ellen de Generous? Give it to you. And brought to Leah and my condo. Okay, no, it was Ellen. You had an Ellen one at one point. I don't, this is no offense to Ellen that I don't remember.

I have no memory of anything ever. But that's pretty awesome. But I'm also just kind of generally surprised that have, like, I don't know, maybe this is like a woman thing or maybe this is just a not me thing? Like, do a lot of people just like have lifestyle cutouts in their house? I can't. I've never had one. Okay.

Okay. Apparently Rachel has cycled through multiple different life size cutout phases. I mean, who's in there now? I don't know. I mean, yeah. Let's open the closet and see it. She's like, well, I've got my Monday cut out, my Wednesday cut out. It's kind of amazing though.

Yeah. It's like a friend all the time. So was it your mom? Was it just you and your brother? No, we have, I have an older sister too. Okay. So there were three of us that all grew up in the same house together. And then it's a blended family.

My dad remarried when I was, I guess, kind of finishing high school and and they had my dad and his wife had a son together so I have a 22 year old brother got it and then his wife also had three kids from her previous marriage oh you have a big family big old blended family yeah yeah how old are you in your parents divorced five you're young yeah yeah and your mom for people who don't know yeah give her a little shout out yeah my mom is a writer she's a pretty well-known writer in certain circles and certain demographics. Her name is Joyce Maynard.

She, yeah, I mean, she's been doing it her whole life. She's been a writer since she was, she started writing for 17 magazine when she was like 13 years old. Oh my gosh, that is so cool. I mean, she was like a stupid overachiever. Yeah. You know, she was, you know, that, she was that annoying kid who was like writing to magazines. as a preteen, basically, like, I want to write for you.

And here's writing samples. That's so cool. It's cool and it's weird. I mean, I think the thing that's tough about it is like, I mean, obviously I have a particular take on it, but like you don't become that person unless you're being driven to be that person. And her parents were driving her to be that person. She had like, she had extrued her, I mean, they used to do writing critiques in their house like on, I mean, like, you know, sit the family down and they would like, you know, take apart each other's writing.

But did your parents ever do anything like that with you or your brother or your sister? Yeah, they locked this up in closets. Act, child, act. Once the composition book was full, then we could come out. Yeah, I mean, it wasn't, I think it was definite. not to the extreme of my mom's childhood for sure. Right. But there was a version of it. Yeah, there was a version of that,

especially with my brother and me. Let's hear it. Let's hear it. Let's go there. I don't know. I mean, I was funny. I was just talking about this with a friend, I guess, the other day.

But yeah, I guess early on, my father is also, a painter and a visual artist. And my mom was obviously a writer. And early on, my brother and I who were very close in age and also just like very close, it was sort of determined that my brother was a visual artist and I was a writer. Interesting. And then even though we both had much broader artistic and other interests that like spilled

outside of those lines. But those were reinforced, especially by the time we got to high school, that was like those lines, those roles were really kind of pushed sort of in a way. And it was weird in hindsight because, yeah, my brother is an incredible artist. But I also loved art and then would feel sometimes like I was sort of like out of my lane or something. like that. And vice versa. My brother is also a terrific writer. And we also just had broad interest. And my brother

ended up going into music. Like he's, and he still does visual art as well. How is he? How is he? He's amazing, man. He's great. He's got two glorious, wonderful little girls. Does he? Oh, my gosh. Six and a half and a four and a half year old. That's so awesome. Yeah, it's pretty cool, man.

They're doing... All girls. You have a girl. Wait, how old's your baby? A lot of girls. Yeah. My baby is 11 months. Oh my God, she's almost one. Oh, shit. It's almost been a baby. Yeah. That's great. Okay. Well, how's it been?

Yeah. How's it going? It's been amazing. It's the best thing in the world, right? It's right up there. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, drugs are pretty good. Depends on from where. Yeah. Yeah. No, street drugs, cut with whatever. Yeah. I'm cool, I'm cool. Then babies.

Yeah, then babies. Yeah. Yeah, it's been, I mean, it's, we got super lucky. I mean, we got lucky. We also worked really hard to like, when I say we, my wife, worked really hard to, like, get things dialed in in such a way that we have not run into. And some of that, again, was probably luck too, but we have not run into a lot of first. parent's pitfalls that has just made this year been much more about just the pure joy experience of her, of the end because she's, you know, yeah.

So we're like well-rested and we have-well-rested. How does that work? She's been sleeping through the night since she was two and a half months old. You're so fucking lucky. That's gross. Yeah, yeah. Disturbing. Yeah, I know. I know it's a weird. It's not a good thing to say a lot. Okay. I have a new niece who's four months old. Yeah. And she's like, well, it goes in phases. But like she was super young and sleeping through the night. Like 10 hours. Yeah. Yeah. Same. Yeah. Yeah. You know what? Like to the ex. But this is all. We'll talk when she's a teenager. Right. Exactly. There's going to be. No, there's going to. There's going to be a hard left turn somewhere. But yeah. My wife is like a systems person. So which I am 100% not. I'm very good at implementing. Thank you.

I'm very good at implementing systems and being like I can fall into somebody else's routine pretty well. But you're all over the place. Yeah, I'm all over the place. So, I mean, like, my wife literally has like come up with like solutions basically for everything. That's kind of nice. And they all weirdly work. It's like fucking witchcraft, bizarre or shit. But like we literally took our 10-month, 10-and-a-half-month-old baby camping for two nights to like two weekends ago.

It's amazing. And she was like napping on schedule and sleeping through the night. Dude. In fucking like in a tent. Where'd you go camping? Amazing. Up in Malibu at like Leo Carrillo Beach. Oh, yeah.

Proper tent camping. But a tent. That's awesome. That's so cool. It was incredible, honestly. And it's good to start young too. And then they just get. Because she's not walking yet, right?

She's not walking. That's why it's doable. Yeah, yeah, right. Yeah. Yeah, but... Are you gonna... Can you share her name or you do not want to? I can share her name.

It is Una. Una. Oh, that's sweet. Yeah. You're like, can you refresh my memory? Basically, that's my main thing for all the questions. No, it's just the best thing in the world. And, like, when we finished Heart of Dixie, like, I was massively pregnant with Breyer.

Yeah, no kidding. And that's kind of why... I don't know. They say it's kind of why it ended. Yeah. Whatever. But that was so long, because Breyer's turning nine in a couple weeks. Wow.

It's fucking crazy. That's insane. So she's in third grade? She's in third grade. Yeah, she's in third grade. And it goes by so fucking fast. But it's the best thing in the world. But I want to talk about the show.

What kind of a mother do you think you are? Oh, Jesus. Well, I don't mean, like, whose podcast is this? I'm allowed to ask questions. You are allowed to ask questions. We are allowed to ask. We're old friends in this room. We are.

Yeah. You can ask any. What kind of mother? Yeah. Like if you were to like... Yeah. Sum it up. Well, like, I don't know.

Yeah. Like, I don't know. Yeah. Like, how do you... Like, what's your approach, I guess, sort of? Like, what's your... Yeah. I wouldn't say like I'm a systematic mother.

Like, I... The schedule, like, all that. I'm definitely more... Briar's, like, still in my bed. Yeah. You know? So if that tells you anything. Yeah.

But it's really like we have such a hardcore, close bond. Mm-hmm. I'm a fully. involved mom, but I also never ever have put myself first in any way, probably to a fault in some areas. So I guess my approach would be, I am too all in. I don't know. How would you say it? No. I think your approach is actually very similar to mine in the sense of you're an intuitive parent. That's a good way to put it. You're not about what the right article is. You're not like doing it based on what people say you should or should.

shouldn't do, it's all based pretty much on intuition. Yeah. For sure. That's a really good way to put it. This is why I have her. And is that you and you feel like you're also that. Totally. And I think, to be honest, I think I'm also that way.

Like left of my own devices. If I was single parenting, there'd be a whole different fucking situation. You like sent a picture. Like, I don't know. We were on a text chain. You sent a picture of like you got her dressed that day. And it was like beanie and like fucking like. Or not like, I was like, yeah.

I could use systems. Like, I'm not a systems person. Yeah. So it would probably be helpful. For people like us, I think it's a really good balance. To have a partner. Yeah, for sure. Like, I could benefit from not apt to.

I don't, I don't have that. It's also, your partner is also more like you. He is. I mean, he definitely uses his head a lot more than I do. Like, he weighs options. You use your fists. I go straight. You just fucking fight.

I go straight on fists. No, I go straight on intuition. I'll be like, I don't feel like that's right. And he'll be like, well, let's look at the data. And he's logical. You know what I mean? He's logical. But we both need someone to come in and type A us.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because we're like. Yeah. Right. Yeah. I like your husband's style, which is like, I'm going to look at a bunch of data, crunch numbers, and then not know anything to do with it. I'm just going to make you read a bunch of.

That is accurate. a bunch of fucking spreadsheets, and then he's just going to leave you with that. Yeah. And then I'll still go with my gut. I'll be like, like I said, it's optioning. So what did you decide? Because I didn't really actually know what to make of all that. Exactly. Yeah. I mean, I think, yeah, I think it would be helpful to have a partner the opposite. I think, you know, Breyer's dad's the opposite in the sense of like articles and facts and things. Oh, yeah. I see that. Completely the other way. Right. I don't know. Right. Article and fact averse.

Yeah. Yeah, exactly. Alternative facts. I don't know. I don't know if I believe this. I go based on alternative backs only. Yeah. Yeah.

Are you sure we need to cut the umbilical cord? Yeah. No, because I was thinking it doesn't feel right. One of the best pieces of advice I got from a doctor when, so we were, when I was pregnant, we were going to different doctors and we didn't know if we should circumcise. Like these are big questions that it never even occurred to us. oh, you're going to have to make these decisions. It's not just one size fits all.

And so we went and interviewed all these doctors, and they were like, yes, you should. And the other ones were like, no, you shouldn't. And then when we found our doctor, he's like, quiet the noise and listen to your heart. Yeah. And I was like, you are our doctor. That's it. I think that decision in particular, I'm like kind of extremely relieved just for that decision alone that I don't have a boy. Because that's a fucking doozy, man.

Yeah, it is. Did you guys know it was a girl the whole time? Did you find out? No. We found out late. I mean, we had, we got, we did IVF. Mm-hmm. So, um, we could have known like when it was implanted.

Oh, yeah. Oh, right. You know. Right, right, sure. From moment one. Um, but we waited until, I think like seven months of pregnancy. Oh, my gosh. That's really late.

Something like that. Yeah. What, what, why then? I don't know to build the anticipation or, something. Why did we wait so long? To build the nursery? What was that? I thought you're going to say to build the nursery.

Well, yeah. No, that waited even longer. Shocking. Yeah. I think it was honestly just to like, yeah, to like have this thing to kind of look forward to. Yeah. Well, part of it also was I didn't want to know.

And so it was a process of like me slowly coming over to her side. Yeah. And then it was really sweet. Like, you know, we had the little envelope and we went up to idle wild for a weekend, you know, kind of like... Baby moon. And exactly, yeah.

And like, you know, hiked up to this like rocky point. Watch the sunset and open that thing. Aw, that's so sweet. Kind of, you know, it's not the same thing as, you know, setting off fireworks in the national forest and causing a wildfire that is extinct. Opening an envelope. Totally work. Broad Ideas is supported by Quince.

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Terrible. I mean, no, it wasn't terrible. Was it like multiple tries or? We, no, I mean, in that regard, it was fairly straightforward. And again, like, you know, I know that so many people have incredibly fraught journeys with that. So, you know, I'm conscious of that when I say that, like, yeah, we were very fortunate. We did a couple of extractions, but the first embryo that we implanted took. So that was amazing. And that's the matter. And that's part of her name being Una. is like she was like the first uh the first extraction we did we only got one egg out of it and uh wow and that was and she oh my god i just thought chill so sweet you guys are so blessed so it's not always that easy no 100% yeah wow but i think iv i mean i think ivf is just an incredibly obviously the you know when it works out the um

The results are, you know, worth anything, basically. But it's a lot. It's a lot for a woman. Yeah. I think it's just an incredible amount of pressure. It's an incredible amount of anxiety about the doctor's appointments and the shots, the hormone situation is just fucking bananas. Were you helping her with the shots?

Yeah. Well, she's, I'm like very needle averse. And she is the opposite. She like watches like surgeries on YouTube. So she's like, ooh, cool. I get to fucking play doctor. Like I'm, you know. But again, like it's tough because she's a very systems oriented person and is really good at that stuff.

But I, that's not, you know, me is a very, it's a very, it was a steep, very, very deep learning curve for me to catch up to kind of like what where I needed to be for her in that process in terms of like being a partner and and assisting on a on a very difficult journey that required a lot of very painstaking detail oriented process stuff which is not me and we got there I think sort of toward the end of it but I was also working at the time it was just tough you know yeah but you know we got there there. It was tough. And I think it was really, yeah, it was really hard, hard on her. Is it something you guys might explore again? Do you want more kids? Yeah. We mean, we definitely

want more kids for sure. Yeah. You know, as somebody, I think for a lot of people who grew up with siblings. Like, yeah, it's, yeah, I would love for her into having a little sibling. But we'll see. Yeah. We'll see. For sure. Still, still feels all pretty fresh. Well, I mean, she's a baby. Yeah. It's still a baby. I mean, and yes. And also, but yeah.

I know. And I'm also like, yeah, let's get going. I don't know. Yeah. Other factors come into that age, you know what I mean? So I totally get that. I often run, you know, because I grew up with siblings and or my brother, at least, when I was young. And I just think about Briar all the time, but she's so adamant.

She's like, you're not allowed to have a baby. Wow. No. Okay. You're not having a baby mom. Well, it's just been nice. She's almost mine, you know. So she's very accustomed to our little situation.

Well, you know, there's no better way to shake things up than to just insert a baby into the mix. Right. Why not? Yeah. I think it might just be the right way to get Breyer out of her comfort zone to, you know, she comes home from school one day and you've adopted a child. No, but this was really interesting. So my family's in town from Tennessee and one of our little cousins is adopted. And Breyer, I guess, didn't know.

And I didn't realize. And her older cousin, they're on the trampoline like yesterday. And Abby comes running in. And she's like, Breyer didn't know that Caroline was adopted. And I was like, did you not tell her? And Breyer, like, her face. She was like, what the fuck, Mom? You know?

And I think she felt like everybody knew. Right. But her? I know. It's such a sweet moment. Does Caroline know? Oh, Caroline. She uses it just turned, or she's four.

She uses it against my cousin. She'll be like, you're not my birth, mom. She's four years old. So she's fully comfortable with it. Like, no problem. It's very open. They still have a relationship with the birth mom. Like, all of it, you know.

Wow. But yeah, but prior, I felt like she was the last. I didn't know. And we're going to bed and she goes, Mom, does she miss her mom? Wow. Oh, stop.

I know. I know. Oh, get ready. There are big talks in your future. Like everything, you know, and like all of the things that are going on. But yeah, it was really sweet. Like, she was really trying to wrap her head around it.

Yeah, it's a lot. to take in. It's a lot to take in. It's a lot to explain. You know, we talked about adoption last night, too. You did? Are you adopting? Are you adopting? Am I adopted? Yeah. No. Oh. I was like, yeah. Breaking news, Rachel. We've been friends for fucking 30 years, but. Did you actually, did you know you're adopted? Yeah. By the way. Surprise. Surprise. You know that, right? You know that, right? Olivia. Surprise, Livia.

No, we talked about adoption because we were joking and Jeff was like, oh, we're going to have another baby to Elliot, to my oldest. And he's like, please, please, please, please, I want a girl. I want a sister. He asked if we could adopt the baby girl. What did you say? I said yes. Jeff's not on board. What?

Not yet. All right. Not yet. Yeah, I was about to say that's how it works. You work it slowly. You work it slowly. Yeah, wanting to know that it was a girl. Yeah.

We work our magic and get you to the other side. I mean, I think it's just, I feel like that's just everything. You just kind of have to like slow breaking down of your partner to like a middle ground somewhere. For sure. Just keep breaking them down. What's compromise? Now you're going to meet me where I'm at. Yeah, yeah.

That's compromise. That is compromise. I'll stay right here and you come over here. Yeah. I'm over here. Certainly a version of it. Yeah. 100% has it changed you um i don't know how to answer that i mean yeah i mean yes obviously i guess

and in um i mean yeah i guess definitely it's changed me and and not i don't know it's a it's a strange question i don't i mean like i don't um i'm always somebody who's like resistant to that like thing of like, you know, whatever. You go on a fast for three days and you come out and you're like, oh, I see everything differently now. You have like some crazy drug experience. You're like, oh, I, you know, I changed everything for me. I just, I think I'm very resistant to that kind of sort of black and white vision of

change. But, I mean, yes, obviously it's changed big elements of my life. Right. And yeah. I feel like women get asked that so much. They're like, how has it changed you being a mom? But like when it comes to men, I don't even know if they're given the space to explore that as much often time. Yeah.

Does that make sense? Yeah. Right. For sure. Whether you're a woman or a man, I think there's probably an expectation that the answer is yes. Right. Like if you don't say yes, it's changed me. You're an asshole.

Kind of. I mean, a little bit of a dick. That is like the sweetest, purest creature in the world that is entirely dependent on you. Has it changed you? You're an asshole. Yeah, that's a fair statement. But I also think that maybe behind closed doors a lot of people would admit to being still a lot of the version of their same old self, even if they also feel like a true. tremendous incredible amount of love toward this creature and the burden of protection and the

desire to sort of restructure their time in different ways, which are all like beautiful, very natural things I think that happen, obviously. But like I still recognize myself in the mirror. I mean, yeah. But has it made you more fearful in general? at all. But are you okay? But like, are you okay? It's not your fault. It's not your fault. Okay. We're doing goodwill hunting now. All right. I see what you guys are fucking doing here.

No, but I think a lot of times when people become parents, a lot of fear-based shit comes in. If anything, something that has become abundantly clear to me in being with my wife is that I don't have any of the mechanisms. of fear that most people do. Oh, wow. I could see that. In a probably, not in a probably, in an unhealthy way. It is not having those things has allowed me to live my life in an extremely free way. Wow.

But it is also makes, it makes it very hard for me to take care of somebody else in traditional, in traditional safety-based ways. You know those are genes. Really? Yeah. I just did genetic testing. And there's actual gene mutations for the fear gene. Yeah, right.

And there's mutations on it where some people... Your amygdala is actually bigger or smaller. Correct. Like some people genetically are predisposed. Just bust in the house. Well, that's the part of your brain that produced that literally triggers fear. So do you think it's nature or nurture for that? And I love to hear how.

or at least, I mean, it's probably a lot of nurture. I have no idea. Like I was thinking, the reason that I've, what comes to mind in terms of a reference point is that, that documentary about the mountain climber, free solo. Yeah. Alex Honnold, I think, was his name. The guy, whatever, did have to. And they at some point, I mean, talk about, like, that guy's on obviously, like,

the extreme, extreme, extreme end of, like. Where is fear for you ever? Right. And they did. They measured his amygdala. No way. And his amygdala basically had like shriveled up, falling off and disappeared. It's gone.

That's not there. Yeah. Anyway. Yeah. I mean, it's a weird. It's, I think it's very much, I think it's very much a nurture thing. I think it's very much a nurture thing for me. But how does that show up when you say you don't have those typical fears?

Like in what sense? I mean, obviously, like, I'm not going to put my daughter, my tiny little daughter, in, like, some super precarious situation. But in general, like, I do, like, my, you know, my wife is constantly being like, dude, what do you think? Like, oh, I get it. What are you thinking? And I was like, dude, she's, you know, like, she's fine. Right. You know?

Right. What's an example of them? Like, what are you doing? would make her be like, what are you doing? Like Jeff taking Shepard on the Vespah with no helmet? Excuse me? Yeah, like things like that. And again, like I have, I think I have largely at this point like adapted.

I still take all kinds of unnecessary risks for myself that don't even have half the time register as risks. But I have come a long way toward, you know, adapt. both in terms of my partner and also the baby. But yeah, I mean, I guess like... You act before you think a lot of the time. Like most of the time. Yeah, pretty much all the time. Yeah.

I too am intuitive. I don't know if that's intuitive. Or just fucking bonkers. Is it physical or emotional or like are you taking these risks like jumping out of a plane or is it career choices or how does it show up? I think it's all the above. Anything. and everything.

I don't. I mean, if I'm being honest, it's, I am like this, I, I don't think I, this is embarrassing to admit, honestly, I don't think about things that much. Yeah, I get it. I get it. I don't. I do that all the time. I do too.

I don't. Not to the extent of you, but. Like, the, the word consider. Wait. Is not something that I do a lot. But wait, but like, does that also lean into like, consideration of another person. Yeah.

And again, like, this is like stuff that I've had to like, I mean, this is like kind of deep shit, but it's like this is, and this it really is nurture stuff. But like, I mean, I think I learned how to fend for myself and take care of myself in like very deep, profound ways from a very early age. And then was like, you know, I, I mean, I moved out when I was 17. I've been on my own since then. And, like, I created all these different mechanisms that basically, like, make my way of operating work for me, which includes to, like, your point of, like, physical stuff, like, getting hurt all the time.

By the way, everybody, he walked in this morning with, like, an ice pack wrapped up his elbow. This is actually true. And this is, like, this is probably the longest I've gone without any. major injury in my, you know, adult life. But like throughout my 20s and early 30s, I was just, you know, I was breaking bones all the time. And, um, but I also always took that as like the cost of doing business for having like a certain kind of like freedom. Yeah. And the same. And that was, and in a way, like, that's fine, right? Because that's me. That's my body. And like, okay, if I'm the dumb ass who's going to, you know, I've been hit on my bicycle by cars like three or four

times. And if I'm the asshole who's going to get back on the bicycle and like probably get hit again, then, okay, that's on me. Right. He like bikes from like east L.A. Well, I recognize your neighborhood because I'm like, oh, I've written up through here a few times. He really like, yeah, it's a perfect example. But the emotional thing, which is also part of that was something I had to figure out and address in a much more clear-eyed way. obviously a lot sooner. And I think I started doing that in like a more, in a more considered way. Right.

In like my, you know, late 20s or whatever. Because it was so clear to me that the way that I had both kind of been raised and had responded to being raised and then had struck out on my path of adulthood, all of these things had made me extremely. extremely self-sufficient and extremely selfish. Right. Yeah. Extremely just narrow in my vision. And, you know, you hurt a lot of people that way. Right.

So then it's not just breaking your bones. It's breaking hearts. Yeah. Yeah. Sure. Yeah. Sure. Yeah.

So, and I think I've gotten a lot better at it, but it's like, you know, again, And these are like, how does it look in your marriage? Very deep-seated. Right. Yeah, I mean, it's a constant. I mean, this is like the conversation that has been. That she'll be like, yo. Yeah.

Yeah. I mean, and it's kind of remarkable that we've made it as far as we have in some ways for how different we are. And that way, she's from the Dominican Republic. She's like extremely family and community-oriented, you know, sometimes to a fault. It's like, you know, very much like takes a village kind of vibe. And I was raised like my whole family. We were raised to be individuals.

Right, right. And divorce also tells you that that is necessary and possible. Right. And then there are other things that reinforce that over time. But yeah, anyway, yeah. I mean, like from early on, it was just so clear that my wife and I were just coming from like wildly different places. And they're in, I think like we, I mean, it's almost funny in hindsight because like,

you know, it was the kind of thing where we like fell in love and asked questions later. And we were like, oh no, what have we done? And now it's been like a real process. Sure. I would say like the first year and a half or something like that when we first maybe year, It was like this kind of like, you know, whatever. Sort of like a little bit of a whirlwind. We're just kind of like having fun.

My wife didn't think it was a serious thing at all. Meanwhile, I was like totally like, okay, I'm doing this. And but then at a certain point we're kind of in it and we're realizing we just like don't remotely speak the same language in terms of what care looks like. Oh, wow. So, yeah, it's complicated stuff. But we have a lot of conversations about it. That's so good. that you can't. No, I mean, because communication is obviously huge. And you guys have been together

a long time now. Right? I mean, you know, not compared to some people, but six years. Six years? No, that's, you know, to start like that. But I think a lot of people that happens where you just fall first and don't look at all the things. But I think as you get older, that shifts. Yeah. And by the way, like would completely advise a younger version of myself, like, talk about the most important thing ever to like consider like consider what you like what kind of partner you're pursuing right right right duh yeah like and that's i mean like to the point where uh i mean i think if i were doing it now like if i were dating for the first time i would almost like want to do the like those um speed dating no no no i was going to say what are those like personality tests that oh the

meyers briggs i would almost want to do like the mire's briggs i would almost want to do like the mire's Briggs kind of stuff with like my partner. I mean, too, like, I mean, I don't know. Obviously, that takes like some of the fun and romance out of it, but it's also just like, how aligned are we? Yeah, but here's the thing about alignment that I want to know what you think about because I question that myself. Like, I grew up in chaos, right? And my husband grew up in structure. Right. And the two of us, completely different languages. Yeah. Completely. To me, I think it's the most opportunity for growth. If both of us ended up in the same as what we grew up in, then we would be the same through line, though, right? Our values are aligned.

Right. Our values are aligned, but our systems are completely different. Our communications, our needs, you know, all of those things are wildly different and we have to learn each other, right? Totally. But I feel like if you end up, it's like in many lives, many masters, they say when you're with your soul group, right, that you want to reach a little bit out of vibration. Yeah. Because that's where you grow. Yeah. And so looking at those things is the gift.

And if you guys would be completely aligned on it all, like where's the... No, and I... You know what I mean? I also have come to appreciate, obviously, like, I've very much come to appreciate that. I think that growth is super important. I think the, yeah, the, like the degree to which I have been forced to reckon with so many patterns, so many like histories, all this stuff is extraordinary. And I wouldn't trade that, I don't think, for an easier relationship.

Right. But let's be real. There are a lot of moments where, like, you were like, you were like, I want is an easier relationship. Right. You know? Yeah. And, and, and, and it's probably also a myth when you're looking at some other couple that looks like they have an easier relationship to think that it is. But, um. Yeah. That's just, but yeah. But yeah. Well, also sometimes they, I've looked at those two and been like, what I don't know their karma. Like, whatever that means. Like, I have looked at relationships and being like, what would that be like to be with someone so easy? Right. You know? Like, what? No offense to Jeff. No offense to Jeff.

But he's a tricky man. He's, yeah. He's a tricky individual. I want to know this tricky. You know what I mean? He's complex. He's complex. But I have looked at people and been like, huh.

I would be, I always say and like, you know, oh, I'm not going to say this. Yeah, you are. Get us in trouble. Come on. Do you know how many times I say shit on this podcast and like it gets to, and it, anyway. What were you going to say? Well, what I was going to say is, um, I often find that like, I think I would be bored if there wasn't complexity.

that's what I used to think but now I'm like that looks nice sometimes to be like eaten nice you say the same thing though if don't try to front like

oh that's what Jeff tells me too is like you'd be bored to tears like there's something like it's not I don't know like multi-layered multi-layered right

maybe there's like a degree of difficulty somewhere like oh you want that guy with a little fucking trauma You want that guy who fucking just had a little fucking dirt under his fingernails. Dirt under the fingernails. Yeah, that goes along with my like swinging act in the mirrors.

You know, no. But I don't know. And I say that, but maybe that's just because, you know, I don't know. I've been with, I guess I've been with all types of guys. If I, fuck, I got to stop talking. Let's go into those types of guys that you've been with. What types are they? Page one.

How much time do we have? No, I am not. I can't fucking do shit. But basically, I do believe that that's what soulmates do. I think they come in and they show you a mirror of like, here's your stuff that you get to look at. And then you could look at other couples and be like, gosh, that looks so easy. But we don't know 100%. Yeah. What's really going on?

Totally. Or the why. Like maybe those aren't their lessons to learn. Maybe if they've got. Definitely. You know, some other is. It is proven to be the. case over the last six years that I have many, many, many, many lessons to learn.

I mean, I probably could have told you that 10 years. Yeah. Well, I think anybody could. I mean, I think that's the interesting thing is that like, you know, we, there's so many people around us who can see us better than we can see ourselves, you know? And, and it's basically just a matter of figuring out a way to be comfortable enough with any of those people. But your partner obviously, hopefully being like, you know,

Numero or like a best friend or whatever. Sure. You too. That you don't recoil, you know, when somebody is able to have, you know, real conversations with you about that stuff. I don't think that I would say like my wife is the first person who I have even like remotely allowed to penetrate some very like Game of Thrones depth defensive walls. Yeah.

That's amazing. It is amazing. And that's, you know, yeah, that's a starting point. Do you think it was her or do you think you had been trying to penetrate those walls on your own? I've been trying to penetrate for a long time. Yeah. Sorry, sorry. You said you up for that.

I could not. He could not. Couldn't not. Sorry. Say it again. Do you think that you had already been trying to penetrate those walls in your own life and then she came in at a time you were ready? Or do you think it was her with a chisel? Yeah.

I mean, I think I've been on like stumbling down that path for a long time of trying to figure out how to, how to have a different relationship. with myself, you know, but not really knowing how to achieve that exactly. I always felt like, and I thought like therapy would maybe be, and it was sort of a starting point, but I always found like I was too good, I could always, like, I'm too good at charming therapists. Like, if I'm being real, like, I'm like, dude, I can fucking, and that's why I, that's why I'm suspicious of therapy. I'm like, I'm too, I'm good, I'm too good at therapy. I'm too good at therapy.

That's the first time we've heard that here. And by that, I don't mean like, I'm, like, effective at it in terms of what therapy is supposed to accomplish. But I mean that, like, I, in my experience, I have found, like, I can win over therapists. I totally get what you're saying. I get it. And that's completely counterproductive. Right. Right.

But a good therapist will see that. Yeah. And they'll be like, you're, like, you're doing this. But it's just traditional therapy? Like. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And electroshock therapy.

You know, whatever. Like, I don't know. I've seen one thing. Yeah. But no, I mean, that's an interesting point because, you know, people can do that. Like, and in therapy. And then so what are you getting from it? Right.

Yeah. And it's, and you don't, there's, and if it's just the two of you sitting in a fucking vacuum, basically, there's not, there's not enough other feedbacks to kind of, to fill out the picture, sort of. Which is why I think. I think it's so the role of a partner is so crazy because this is somebody who is so, who sees so much, so on like a daily basis, so close. They see you in every different situation. Right.

And if you have a perceptive person, my wife is extraordinarily perceptive about these things, it's just like notes are constantly being taken. I can't only imagine the amount of shit. But you're hearing. It's crazy. Constantly. Yeah. You know, I think, like, I think, you know, what probably started out, like, where I was, like, a novelty act at a certain point. It was, like, oh, wow.

Like, I need to save this man from himself. Yeah. So funny, because I know you. Yeah. For a long time. So, like, I could see. Yeah, sure. And I think it's great that you called in someone like your wife.

Yeah. That can call it all out. Yeah. Yeah. Have you guys ever done therapy together? Mm-hmm. And how does that? How's that? Are you charming that therapist, too?

I mean. And your wife's calling you out. If I'm being real. Yeah. Exactly. We tried, we tried, I think we ran, we've probably done like four or five couples therapists. Oh, that many different people. Yeah. There were several just like abject failures.

There was one guy we were seeing together for, a while, but she ended up not, I think, feeling great about him because she started. I think I charmed him too much. And now we find, we, we,

we might finally have, like, found a lady that, I think also, like, the, um, the, the, um, the, the delivery mechanism is important. Or like the, the, uh, what is it? The, the way that you choose to do it, is important. Like, I think what I realized is, like, weekly therapy was not helpful to us. Mm-hmm. Or at least that version of it. We're doing it once a month now. Okay. With, like, a longer session once a month. And that feels for the time being, like,

that's working. That works. That's great. Yeah. It just doesn't, weekly shit. It was just, like, dredging stuff up when, like, we didn't necessarily, you know, when we're in an okay place, then we're, whatever. No, I get that. And do you guys have your own as well? As well? Yeah. I think that's really healthy. Lately, my husband's therapist has been bothering me. Oh, oh, do tell. Okay. Yeah. Well, because he'll say things and he'll be like, well, so-and-so said.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. And I'll be like, she hasn't. Do you know what I mean? Does that ever happen? Like, he'll be like, well, so-and-so, like he'll quote his therapist. She said that it's totally normal for me. And I'm like, oh. Yeah, that's a non-starter if you start doing.

the fucking therapist quoting. Yes, right. Fucking horses shit. But I do find some therapists will just agree with you no matter what, and that's also a I don't like that. I don't want them to agree with me. If they're just like a yes man, you know? Yeah.

No, that happens. It does happen. Yeah, for sure. It's the story of my charmed therapy life. It isn't just a fucking yes man and women. She says I don't have commitment issues. I'm like, well, you've, tell me if this is weird. he'll never, never, never put his clothes in the dirty clothes.

He hangs them off of the top. He can't commit. No. Because I do it because they're sweaty. He does it because he's not committed to them being dirty. Yeah, that's weird. Right? Oh, he's not committed to them being dirty.

Okay. So it's like maybe I'll put this T-shirt back on? Maybe. Oh, okay. He wants the option. I mean, I'm not going to lie. Like, I'm into it as like a. methodology. I mean, I kind of get that. But it's always hanging off the thing. I understand,

like, the things that are annoying, like, wet towels on a bed drive me crazy. I'm like, put it in the hammer. Just go, commit. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That shirt's going to be okay. Not washed. You have to, you have to, you know, will yourself over to a whole lot of, like, weird quirks. That's what, yeah. Just like, okay, you're the guy who can't commit, fucking put his clothes in the hamper. All right. I guess that's who I'm with. That's what I do. And I just go, Right. I mean, yeah. And he never, ever questions if they wind up in there. He does. He'll be like, where are my black? I'm like, they're in the dirty clothes.

Just be thankful that that's the guy you got and not the guy who's like, oh, I've also got a second family in Pittsburgh. Oh, yeah. He's from Pittsburgh. What if we does? Oh. Weird. Weird. Okay.

It's all right. Channeling some shit. Charming and channeling left and right. That's scary. I know. It is. There's a whole spectrum. of, you know, what we can put up with.

And I think that ranks relatively low. Yeah, no, I can deal with it. I can put them in. The clothes on a hamper. How long have you guys been married? How long have we been married? Or together? Married. Well, together, 10 years?

Yeah, it'll be 11 years soon. It's a long time. I'm like, I marvel at people who, you know, whatever. Just anything, feel, these relationships just feel so long. People who have, like, been together 10 years or 15 years. I'm just like, holy shit. It's just like, it is wrong. Listen to him.

Yeah. What? I don't know, man. I don't mean that in a bad way. Just like objectively. It just seems like crazy. But you're six years. That's a decent amount of time.

I'm sure it doesn't feel like six, you know? It feels like six. It feels like I've got fucking white hair and shit now, dude. Shit's unchanged. I'm getting old. I'm like, what the fuck? Like, I look back at pictures at the beginning of it. I'm like, there's a fucking youth.

Yeah. Wait, wait until your kids eight. And then you're going to be like, what? I'm 39. You're 39. You're 39. Yeah. All right.

So you're going to be 40. I'm going to be 40. In February. February. Crazy. What? 24th. 24th.

You knew it was 20s. It's really. Is that Aquarius? Pisces. Pyses. Sensitive souls. Yeah. Oh boy.

Oldest sign on the zodiac, I believe, maybe. That's an artist soul. That's what they tell me. That's what it is. Oh, boy. All right. Calm down. Come down.

He charmed me. He did. He charmed you. He charmed you. Fucking, just fucking Willie. Just fucking gay. This fucking guy. Speaking of charming people, and I'm just going to put this in because Harda Dixie, when we were working on it, pilot whatever, they had the whole storyline planned out.

And old Willie here came in. And they were like, we're going to pivot. And it wasn't Zoe and George. It became Zoe and Wade. Oh, really? It was originally supposed to be. George was my love interest. Not the right choice.

No disrespect to Scott or anyone. It just wasn't the mood. We had great chemistry. It was so much fun. And it just went a different way. because old charming pants over here. Yeah. Just rolled in without thinking.

Just wormed his way in. But that way, we had so much fun. We had a lot of fun. Especially that pilot. It was really. I just rewatched most of it because my wife had never seen it. Oh. No way.

She's like a total, she's like an inveterate binge watcher of all kinds of like random shit. Right. And, and yeah, anyway, she got, she got really into it. Yeah, it's like 100% her kind of show. Oh, I love that. The show that she's seen a gazillion, it's like Gilmore Girls, she had seen a bazillion times. So many people come up and say that they, you know, because it's such a feel good show, right? I really feel like they should reboot it.

I know, we all do. I love that we all still love each other and, like, support each other and would totally do it and have fun because we had a really good group. We had a good time. And I mean, and, you know, I've become like super close with Lila. Yeah, I know. Lila's the best. She created the show, showrunner. Also, what I'll say is,

Wilson and I were on the OC together. I know. Wasn't that like one of your first parts? Can we start? Oh, yeah, it was. No, we're going to go there. I already did your P. Your O.C.

podcast. Oh, my God. You still have PTSD from it. Why? What happened? I got fired from the O.C. What? For why?

Because I was a fuck up, man. Because I. You want to, you just, well, yeah. No. How? I was, it was my first job. I didn't know how to read a call sheet. Oh, no.

I know. It's a sad story. It's not like you were a fuck up. Well, yeah, except for it's like it's all indicative of the same stuff. Like, I don't know how to ask for help. I don't know how to ask questions because I feel like it reflects badly on me or it makes me look stupid. So basically, I didn't know how to read a call. She, PA had been like, this is back before email, I mean.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't know if it was back before email. It wasn't before email existed. It had to pigeon message. I didn't check my email every day at that time. Like, I would check like once a week maybe. Anyway, they didn't, I don't think they sent you call sheets via email is what I'm trying to say. They didn't send you scripts.

Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Anyway, we went into a weekend and I didn't get a call from the PA. And so I was like, okay, I guess I'm not working on Monday. And I was living in the time in like this basement apartment in Atwater Village that I didn't have cell reception. And I like, you know, woke up at 10 a.m. Fucking emerged from my cave. And like all of a sudden, like 400 messages on my.

phone and they were shooting up in Malibu like deep Mal at Pepperdine I guess um and the fucking I was supposed to be there at like 6 a.m. It was already like 10 and then I had to go to Malibu which was like an hour and a half away. So I ended up showing up to it by the time I got to set it was like five some six hours late. It was like bad. I walked on to set. They had given an extra my part for the for that the scene or whatever. And when I got on to set, Some dick producer literally initiated a standing ovation for the extra in front of me. That's so mean. Oh, that's so low.

And they had brought me to set, like put me through like fucking makeup, all that stuff, brought me to set. Made me like watch this fucking standing ovation. And then they were like, okay, you're wrapped. Was it Josh Schwartz? No, it wasn't Josh. I'm just, yeah. No, Josh was great. But it was some other, you know, old white guy, whatever.

Oh, no. Wow. So you didn't get to work. No, he did. That was like the last day of the, that was the last day I was supposed to. But that day you didn't work. That was the last day I was supposed to be filmed. We had already filmed other stuff.

Yeah, no, he's in the show. Yeah, no, I know that. But there was supposed to be, I remember, like, I think it was supposed to be like a recurring arc or something like that, which obviously was fucking no moss. Eeks. But you, anyway, whatever. And then you were, there you were in Bluebell. Years later. Did you cry?

You know, I think... You may have shed a tear. I don't think I cried. I think I was, you know, humiliated. My agents ended up dropping me. Fuck. I mean, that's a little extreme. I don't like that.

It was, I don't know. I mean... Regretts tough. Have you gotten to that part in the David Beckham documentary yet? I've gone to that part in life. I don't need to see it in a David Beckham documentary. I'll tell you that much.

You got into that part in life yet. I don't need David Beckham to tell me. about regret. Oh my gosh. Regret is painful. Yeah. Regret sucks, man. I don't believe in regret.

Yeah, but if you've ever done anything where you felt it? I believe, of course. She's like, I don't fucking care. And this is where we find out that Rachel is a serial killer. I have no empathy or, no, I just,

I think that I don't like the word regret. I like that, of course, people make mistakes. Right. But you learn from it. I don't like to hold on to them. Have you ever experienced it, though, like a deep regret? Like, fucking, I regret that choice or that. I'm sure, yeah, of course.

I can't think of any. You can't see it on her. I'm not feeling. What do you mean? Of course I have to regret. It sounds like somebody who's like spent hours standing in the mirror answering this question to herself. Rachel, do you know what it's like to feel, yes, I know what it's like to feel a regret.

Oh, man, this is real grim. Rachel. You are outing yourself, sister. And we have video now. Everybody has regrets. Okay. I don't. My brain just can't like fire off examples. Okay. Is that fair?

Okay. Don't fucking look at each other like that. No, right. Don't fucking do that. Of course. No, obviously it's not, the name of the game is not to like dwell on it. But yeah. I would also like to clarify that like getting fired from the OCE is not like one of my like big

life like regrets. you know, but... It's not. No. That one would stick with me. Definitely not. You have one with the O.C. I have an O.C. regret.

What's your O.C. regret? Oh, this was a pain for me. So Josh Swartz wrote me apart. Uh-huh. It was like one line and my reps made me turn it down. Because it wasn't a big enough part. They're like, wait for something bigger. They were like, wait for something bigger.

Like, you're not taking co-star parts at the moment, blah, blah, blah, blah. And so I was like in, oh, over my head with them. Like, I felt like they were too big for me. So I felt like I had to do what they said. And I did. And then no other parts ever came along. Yeah. Yeah. So that was a regret. Yeah. It was a lesson. It was a regret. Don't tell her what her regrets are or not. That was a regret. Let's have fun. Let's have a little fun with Wilson. Oh, let's have fun with Wilson. You guys have like actual cards. Yeah. Okay. Look at us. We're professional. You guys look very Right.

Don't we? Yeah. Yeah. What can you say during sex that you can also stay at the dinner table? More. Yeah. That works. If you had to get hypnotized for one thing, what would it be?

Uh, I don't, pass. I don't know. It could be to start something, it'd be quit something. It could be. Right. Anything. All right. I mean, at the moment, coffee, I guess, but I'm just kind of back on the sauce in an unfortunate way.

Yeah, I get it. Snoo. answer. Yeah, yeah, I'm sorry. Just kidding. What movie would depict your life? Like a movie that's already been made? Yes. Yeah. Don't write us a whole movie right now. Fade up from black. You would do. A young boy.

What movie depicts me? Fuck, I don't know. Oh, man. These are fucking weird questions. That's why we do it. Okay. All right. I'll come back to that way. Days and confused. Days and confused. No.

I'll come back to that way. All right. Fine. Go. If you weren't an actor, what would you be? Um, I don't know. Maybe like a teacher. I was going to say professor.

Yeah, a teacher. It's the sweater. It's giving professor. Yeah, that's it. It's giving professor. Or, I don't know. Or like something outdoors. Totally.

You'd be like, like, like I legitimately thought about. about like doing, um, uh, like, like wilderness training. That's what I'm saying. Like, I fully see you like adult scout like fucking. Exactly. Survivor. Right. Right.

What's the, uh, outward bound? What's the, uh, outward bound? Yeah. Do you guys ever, you know what it is? That's the movie that depicts your life? Not the Disney version. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. No, not the movie outward bound.

No, there's a program called outward bound. What are you talking about? I think there's like a cartoon outward bound. There is. There's a movie called Outward Bound. I think. No, Homeward Bound. Homeward Bound. Homeward Bound. Homeward Bound. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, Homeward Bound. Anyway, whatever. Okay, sorry. Oh, my God.

Yeah, outward bound what? It's like a... It's like a wilderness training thing for teenagers. Okay. Yeah. Okay. I just spit. I was excited. Was that me or you? I don't know. You. It's your last day on Earth. What are you eating and what are you doing? Yeah.

I'm probably eating. eating pizza or spaghetti or like pasta. And now I'm probably like hanging out with my daughter in nature somewhere. Oh, that's sweet. Where are you getting pizza from? There's a place in Echo Park that is legitimately the best piece I've ever had. What is it? It's called Quarter Sheets Pizza Club.

Quarter Sheets. Oh, my God. I didn't you get that? I want to go there for so long. I want to say that now it's blown up, but I was an early adopter. Of course. wife and I, yeah. We've been on the quarter sheet's jock for like a well over a year. Now, like literally within the last like month, they've been on like every top 10 list of every

I'm sure. I did hear about it like a year ago for what it's worth. Okay. But I haven't been. Whatever. But I haven't been. But no, it's it's like, it's like, the food itself is phenomenal. But the whole like little, it's like a such like a, it's such a vibe the whole place. And it's awesome. We could go there tomorrow. You know, we're going to be enough of work. Long lines now. Well, whatever. What's your biggest panty dropper? Like dropping my panties? I knew you was going to say that. Like my panties?

Is that what you mean? Either or how do you want, however you interpret it. My panties down. Yes, to the news. Well, yeah, okay. What's my biggest panty dropper? Panty dropper? Panty dropper.

Fuck, man. He's blushing. Yeah. Someone brings you food. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. Quarter sheet. Corner sheet.

Bingo. You'd be like, eh, we're done here. And my G-string is on the floor. What would you do if you found a dead body in a hotel room? I mean, all fucking authorities? Obviously what?

You find a hotel, a dead body in hotel room and you like walk away. What are the other answers to this? There are other answers. There are other answers. And we're always shocked. Okay, I want to talk to some of these people. Jesus Christ. Fucking lunatics.

If aliens. I think you said if anally, I was like, okay, wow. You're like, all right, we're really going here. If anily. If anally. No. If aliens. What's your favorite finger?

What is? Well, the smallest one. Stop me. It's a pee, please. Oh my God. I'm going to be my pants. If aliens landed on Earth, who would you? I can't ask this.

It's so stupid. Who comes up with these? Do you guys come up with these? We don't. Okay. Who would you recommend they talk to? I'd recommend they come on this podcast. You two knuckleheads.

They're like, this is 21st century America? Yeah. So, Alien, if you had to adopt one celebrity, who would it be? If I had to adopt one celebrity? I'm dying. Wow. I had to adopt a celebrity. That's a good question.

Oh, we're a good one now. That is a good one. We'll give this one to the alien. Like, for some reason my first instinct is like, who do I want to save? Oh, that's good. Great one. I'm like, who's, like, deeply troubled and I think I could maybe get them on the right track? Oh, yeah.

I don't know, man. I don't know. I don't know. I guess I said maybe I don't know enough about celebrities. I don't know, like Lindsay Lohan, circa 2012. Would that feel right in your house, though? No. No, it would not.

I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. Would that feel right in your house? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't know. But then I'm thinking of like also like the kid from Jerry McGuire at that age. Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. That's a good one. You know. You thought he was like I want that kid around. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Hey, Jerry. What was this like? I don't know. What was your favorite song in high school?

I mean, I listened to like, I was like big into like indie hip hop. So like, you know, what we called conscious hip hop at the time. Oh, I've never. Yeah. We sure. No, it wasn't, but it wasn't like, I mean, don't get it wrong. I love Tupac. I was like a huge Tupac fan.

Yeah. But I also just like listen to like. you know, tribe called Quest and De La Sol and like, you know, whatever. He's cool like that. Funny that you said, literally, when I said digible planets, you said cool like that. And that was Digable Planets. I didn't even hear you say Digable Planets. I was still on Dayla.

Oh my God. Yeah. Huh? Huh? What? What? I know. I was going to say, still, to this day, some of my favorite songs you introduced me to.

Wilson's very good with music. Yeah. Oh, good to me. Give you a little credit. You're probably listening to Baby Bluga. Yeah. A lot of rap. Baby Baluga.

Raffi. I sing that to Breyer all the time when she was a baby. Aw. I know. It's a good one, man. It is a good one. Baby Baluga is a fucking winner. Well, this was,

I'm so happy that you came. This was a lot of fun, man. Yeah. So much fun. It's always good. It's good to see you guys. You do. Like the last time I saw you,

you were hanging out of the back of a golf cart on the Warner Bros. Oh my God. Wait. We have to talk about that really quickly. Yes. Oh, we should play that for his episode. We should play that for his episode. Sure.

Still one of my favorite things. The best ever. Yeah. That was so, and you and your brother wrote it. Yeah. Call me doctor. Your brother made the music too, right? I wrote it.

My brother made the music. I came to your apartment. It was like in K-town or something. Yeah. You were in my brother's closet. I was in his brother's closet recording this fucking song. Yeah.

Yeah, yeah. How far we've all come. How far we've all come. I'm still recording things in closets. No, but it's, it's, I fucking love it. It was so much fun and I'm so happy we did that. I appreciate. I can see with clear, with clear, with more clarity, I should say,

that your gameness was, was truly special. Because a lot of people are not game to put themselves in a potentially compromised position. Because I, yeah, right. Hey-oh. We'll fucking. Yeah, no, you did it. Oh, I was so down. It was so fun.

And it was a blast. And then, you know, like when, and the thing that proves itself out time and time again is that, like, you know, when people do are actually willing to take those risks, it's usually worth it. Except for the We Are the World. Imagine? You know what? I don't think that was a risk. Was it? I don't know.

I don't think they knew it was a risk. Right. I think they thought they were shared. This just came up the other day. It did. People were asking, like, if you were part of it. If I did it and Teresa, I was like, what? Oh, God.

Yeah. There's certain email list you're glad not to be on. That you thought you once wanted to be on. You're like, oh, you missed out. Yeah. Yeah. No, but we have to rewatch that. Yeah, let's rewatch it.

It holds up. We do good work, Wilson. Yeah. You in particular. But yeah, so much fun. So much history. My favorite line is the... Which one?

give a pap smear with an ovenman, bitch. Yeah. Of course he loves me. Like, I hope that one. It's my favorite. It's like so random and stupid. Dugan, here's what's crazy. So I'm still good friend with Dugan.

He's like a big commercial director now. But he has spent the, I'm like pain to say it looks like it's just maybe is falling apart. But he spent the last five years getting very close to making a. very legit vanilla ice biopic. Oh, what? Like got all the rights to his music. He spent a ton of time with ice. He had actors attached.

They had like Dave Franco was producing it. Like they had a $20 million budget. Like, he fucking segued hard into fucking. Oh my God. That's crazy. Which is like, you know, his total sweet spot. But anyway, it looks like maybe it's not happening.

Oh, no. I hope it happens. I do too. He's like a suit. I mean, he's a legitimate. extremely talented director. He was so whole. And his wife. Yeah, his wife, Bethany. So talented. Just like very creative. And also just like he's one of the funniest people I know too. And yeah, anyway, the world needs more of his stuff out there. So yeah, it'll happen. I hope it happened.

I have faith. It'll happen. Yeah. Well, thanks for joining us. We love you, Wilson. Yeah. It's good to see you, man. So, okay, yes, Olivia's still not here. She's still gone from what we, recorded the intro. She's still gone from when we recorded the intro. She's in the hospital, though, with Shepard. I guess we can tell people because he has RSV and Shepard. Because of some of his stuff, it hits him harder. He's doing okay. But that's where they are. So that's why she's not here. We normally would be bringing everyone a holiday episode around this time. I mean, the show must go on. The show must go on. We are decorated. for Christmas. We have a centerpiece of a tinsel tree. Yeah, where did you get that? It's a homemade

craft, Rob. I can teach you. Can you? No. So we are decorated for the holiday. We're dressed festively. I'm in PJs because what's more Christmasy than PJs? I broke out my beanie. Because you said you walked in the door this morning and you said I had a feeling you would have a Beanie on. I needed to match. You needed to match. Do you always want to match me? Yeah, that's usually my plan.

Are you the Danny DeVito to my Schwarzenegger? Yeah, exactly. I knew it. Rob. Yes. What are your holiday plans? We are escaping L.A. We decided to take a last-minute trip.

Yeah. And we're going to fly up to Seattle. on Christmas Day. Then let me ask you something. Yeah. Are flights cheaper on Christmas Day? Yeah, sure. Okay.

I don't know, because I feel like a lot of people probably don't fly on Christmas Day. Well, I usually have a rule that I don't like to travel during the holidays because it's not worth. It's very hectic. We flew to Texas on Christmas Day last year, and it was, airport was empty. It was great. And then this year, we picked Seattle because we could fly to Burbank. That's the dream. That should really dictate anywhere, you go. Pretty much. I think I'm going to exclusively start traveling.

That have drug flights from her bank. I support it fully. I will be flying not on Christmas Day. I will be in the hubbub. The Great White North. The Great White North, yes. And I will be enduring. I almost said hospitals. Airports. Sorry, Olivia on the brain. How cold does it get? And it gets F freezing.

Now not just freezing. So like when you go beyond freezing, it's Fah freezing. So below 32 degrees. Absolutely. They'll be like, well, it's Celsius up there, so I always have a hard time. I feel like I have something in my nose.

I always have a hard thing. Is it? Yeah, you got like a big bugger. Rob, do I? Yeah, it's like lower above your lip now. Rob, do you know in the shower yesterday? I had like a little mini bloody nose, and I've never had one before in my life. I don't think I've ever had a bloody nose either.

I'm not, yeah, like there's people that just get bloody noses. Yeah. I don't. Were you, like, digging around and had some blood? No, Briar and I took a steam shower because Breyer's also sick. And you know, when you go, and you try to get, like, clear it out, like a little blood came out. I don't know if I'd call out a bloody nose, then. I don't think it, I don't think it cleared.

You had some blood in your snot. Yeah. That happens. But it was like more than I know. It was a little, but it wasn't a full bloody nose. Glad to hear. You're welcome, everybody. But yeah, so it gets like, so it's Celsius up there, and I have the hardest time converting.

But it'll be like 18 below. I don't know what that means. I don't know what that means either. I think once it goes negative, the conversion also gets harder. It does, because zero and 32 are the same. So 32 is freezing in Fahrenheit zero. And Celsius is the same as 32. But then...

So it's not quite as bad as it sounds. No, it can be, for sure. Especially, yeah. Because it's not like we're, like, in a city where even, like, further north. And lots of snow? Yes. I don't do great with the cold. That checks out.

Yeah. Like, you know, I wear, like, big down jackets in, like, 60 degrees. But you're Chicago, so you do better. Are you going to eat any good food in Canada, in the small town, Canada that you're going to be in? You know what I love? Breyer's great-grandmother is 97. Grandma Rose. Great, she got a great-grandmother alive.

Wait. Yes. Great. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. She has a great-grandfather alive, too. She had another great-grandma. She passed away this past year.

But she has a great-grandma, Rose. Grandma Rose. I love her. New Yorker. my favorite person, and she will be there. And that is what I am most looking forward to. Grandma Christmas? Yeah, she's the best.

I love her dearly. So I'm very happy about that. And she still cooks and stuff. That's Hayden's grandma or that's yours? Rose is Hayden's. And Breyer's middle name is after her because she's best. So you're mostly eating her food? We've got...

No, there's a whole collaboration of foods. Are you bringing all your gifts to Canada? That's the hard thing because that would require

checking a bag and then that's a whole other thing. You're not allowed to check a bag. It just makes you spend more time at the airport. You have TSA though, right? No. Why not?

I don't know. What's my problem? It's so easy to get TSA. I know. What's my problem? Did you get it at Burbank? At Burbank? Your TSA pre-check thing? I mean, I got it at a facility that I didn't get it at the airport. You don't have to go to the airport to do it? No. There's like a, there's a center that you go. They just do like a background check, fingerprint you and then check you out. Well, where's the link, Rob? I think we, I think we sent it to me two years ago. Yeah, two years ago when you were traveling. Okay, if you could resend it, that would be great.

Yeah, I think Natalie just finally did it, and it was like she had the number within like a week. Okay, great. I will get on that in the New Year. That's my resolution. Yes. Now, do you get presents, because you're not with your family, do you get presents for everybody and like send them? So we normally do like a secret Santa. Oh, yeah. Where we just assign, because there's nine grandkids. That's a lot. Yeah, too many.

People. Well, the kids should all get gifts. I feel like Secret Santa should be for the adults. Well, no, we skip adults. That means there's also there's siblings plus their significant others. Too many. It's too many gifts plus my parents. So we normally, everyone gets assigned a kid or a pair of kids.

And then we just do like a big gift to that kid. Also, we don't... Care of kids? Well, everyone has two kids. Okay. So, like... Oh, like you get this family. We'll get my sister's family.

You have your sister's family? Well, this year, for whatever reason, my sister's decided that everyone gets gifts. What do you mean? Everyone, every kid gets a gift from everyone. So we... Oh, like I just said. Yeah. So now you have to get nine gifts.

And now we have to get a bunch of gifts for the boys, which we don't... They don't need more toys. We don't. want more toys. I hear you. You know what was so awesome? We did this toy drive and Breyer and Winnie and Stella, you know, the girls, they went and they handed out the toys and everything and it was just, I think it's important for the kids to see. That's what we normally with Calvin make him like go through his room before Christmas and like clear out and donate a ton of toys. Yeah. Because he's run out of

space. Yeah. No, it's, it's, yes, I think the clean out before Christmas is a good idea. So yeah, we got, they got like one gift from us. Well, that's not true. One gift? That was, that was originally the plan. But then there was some, like, uh, kids toy store or online shop that's going out of business that we liked a lot. So, Mapa Mundi kids. Okay. I don't know. I know. I like, I like supporting all those. Yeah, there was like a local shop. That's awesome. There was a, we were at a mall for the toy drive and they were running out of toys.

So we went in to get more toys for the kids. And it was like this little independent toy store. And I think we like really. Just cleared out. Well, there were so many people contributing and helping out. And Breyer wound up working behind the counter and bagging toys. Put her to work. Put her to work.

Yeah. But the kids, like, loved that. it. How was your Elf on the shelf been going? What's yours named? Calvin named him Quago. Oh, yeah, that's right. And this year's already been a little rough.

We've forgotten maybe three or four nights already and it's only like should I close the door. It's only two weeks in. You've forgotten four nights? Oh, good. Three to four nights. We forgot. And he's like,

he just must really like it up on that. shelf. I guess that's why he's off on a shelf. Yeah, they do. They get positions that they really get attached to. Yeah, and then they just don't move. Or like, he got stuck. He got stuck one of the nights. He got stuck. Um, North Pole, that's Breyer's name. He's currently stuck inside, um, a wrapping paper rule. She hasn't, she hasn't found him yet. Um, do you help her find him or? Um, sometimes, but every morning I'm like, I haven't seen? Well, yeah, you gotta play along. I wonder where he is.

I'm like, we're whispering because Breyer's home sick and she cannot hear what we're talking. She's in the other room. She's in the other room and the door's open. I hope she's not listening. But I don't want her to stop believing in any of it. It's getting close, though. I mean, we need. Like she's going to be that weird kid at like,

It's a routine that still believes. Stop. We made her Santa List the other day. She wants a checkered skateboard, which I thought was pretty rad. Yeah, Calvin asked for a guitar. Oh, yeah? Is he getting one? He's getting a guitar.

What size is he getting? Just one of the mini-jacks and mini guitars. Is that, I don't know, I learned that they come like half, three-quarter. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was all they had left at guitar center. Oh. That's what he got. Well, it was like different color options, which.

He's very particular. He likes blue. Okay. So I had to get like a blue cable as well. It's an electric guitar? Yeah. You didn't get him in a foo stick. No. Because he takes music lessons.

Yeah. He's doing piano and guitar. That's so cute. And that's like where, well, it's like full setup and he just gets to pick basically what he wants to. That's really sweet. Fiddle around on each week. And it's been mostly piano and guitar. So he's got a piano already.

He does? Where is it? It's in his room. Oh, like a little electric. Practice. Ten minutes a day. That's sweet. Ryer has a guitar recital on Sunday.

She's going to play the first two lines of Ode to Joy. Do you call them bars or bars just the little sections? The first two notes. No. No, but if it's like the whole line. A bar is just right before there's like a thing. Sounds right. You don't know?

I don't read music, no. Oh, gone. Yeah. That sounds right, though. That sounds right? Yeah. Yeah. So, like, a good 15 seconds.

Yeah. That's enough. It's really sweet. Yeah. Maybe longer than 15, maybe 30. Because she's going to go slow. Yeah. And maybe start over a few times.

But she's really nervous and it's really sweet. Where's it at? She takes, I don't know, actually I don't know. But for like her school or it's... No, it's like a music school where she takes lessons. It's having recitals. A little lower pressure then, because it's just people from the school there. Yeah, not from her school.

Yeah, yeah, from the lessons. But she does have her winter concert next week. It's scary. And we have her school holiday party and I'm a room parent, so I'm responsible for... Treats? I'm making these little snowmen out of powdered sugar, Donuts. Powdered donuts.

That's what they're called, right? Yeah. I'm like, wait. Yes, which I have to get. And a game that you're going to help me assemble. Are you, you should make my cookies. Oh, well, I don't have time to do that. You should make them for me.

I'm making them today. You are? Shouldn't you've made them to bring here? Probably. I was going to. I was going to make them this morning when we were going to record this afternoon. You were going to, I love the vision. of you baking.

Do you wear an apron? I do have an apron. Does it have a saying on it? No, we have a bunch of aprons, actually. Explain? I don't know. Got one with like a Gordon Ramsey one. Fabio, the Top Chef guy.

Got one from him. You just have a lot of aprons given to you from people. Yeah, as like gifts of like one from my old boss that he got one for me in like Italy that's got some like crazy logo on it. Got a lot of apris. All right. Well, maybe you can share a photo. I'm going to try Olivia one more time. You have to go to Whole Foods after this and get all the ingredients. Stuff for your... How? Hi, you answered. Hi. We were just wrapping up. So we just, I thought I'd try you one last time. Oh, you guys are recording. Yeah. Oh, okay. I told everybody that you are in the hospital with Shepard.

Yeah, that's sweet. Yeah, Shepard's doing a little bit better right now. And I know this because he ate a piece of bacon. And that is a good sign because he hasn't eaten in two days or three days. And so he ate his first piece of bacon. And then he just asked for two. He's got a handful of bad guys. And that is a good improvement.

Did you explain what was going on? I said that he has RSV and, you know, things hit Shep a little harder. Yeah, and you can hear Jeff coughing. Everybody's sick. Yeah, Jeff's got it now, too. What do you say? He said Jeff has it now too. Jeff has it.

Elliot has it. Everybody's sick. But with Shepard, it's, like, really scary when he gets it. because it's oxygen saturation tips and it's really scary. And they told us they're keeping us another night because they need to monitor him while he sleeps. So they're doing ibis, breathing treatments, oxygen, and all of that stuff. So. Aw.

Sorry, I couldn't be with you guys today. I love you so much. We love you too. And we told everybody we don't do our holiday episode this year. like usual because of circumstances, but... Yeah, what are you guys doing without me? That's so creepy. Well, we're just... Rob and I are just talking about riveting things.

We do have a Christmas decoration on the table. That Rachel made herself. Did you get all the board games that we were going to play? Yeah, we played all of them. They were great. We played all of them. No, I think we're going to return everything. We did have things planned everybody, but we'll just save them. For next year. Oh, I'm sorry.

That's not very festive. It's not very festive, but I kind of wish Rob still wore the elf costume and just was chilling in the elf costume. You didn't? Oh, you guys really didn't. You didn't pull it together. I'm in PJs. I figured that's Christmassy.

I'm wearing a beanie. And I got a Christmas shirt. We had a whole Christmas episode planned and then R.SV hit. RSV hit. Why don't you guys just do it? Because it's not broad ideas without you. Should we do a Valentine's episode, guys, to make up for holiday and still put Rob in the elf costume? I was going to...

Why don't you just go do it? You give us all RSV before our trips. Because I'm not leaving Shepard. Yeah, you're not leaving Shep, Shep. Jeff, why don't you just go do it? That's cute. Just like, why not just go? We're both watching Dracula movies all day.

Are you? We're watching Hotel Transylvania right now. Oh, okay. Got it. I thought you meant like real Dracula, and I was like, that tracks. Oh, no. No, I can't leave him. I love you guys, but I just can't do it.

No, I know. Your baby. All right, well, we're happy we got you on the phone. All right. I miss you guys, and I'm sorry I ruined your Christmas. We love you so much, and we hope Shepi feels better. I want to hear Rob say it. Rob.

Say what? Tell her you love her. We love you so much. We. We just say I love you. I love you. You should see its face. Because it's true.

He just needed permission to say it. Yeah. All right. Love you. I love you. Bye. We got our Christmas wish and miracle. Okay, everyone.

Have a happy holiday. Thanks, Wilson, for coming on. Happy New Year's. Happy New Year's. We will see you in 2024. 2024. Bye. That was a HeadGum podcast.