Brooke and Connor Make A Podcast - Honestly, Touch Grass

Episode Date: December 8, 2022

MERCH: http://bncmerch.com  Ad Free & Bonus Episodes: https://tmgstudios.tv  This week, Brooke and Connor have an important message for everyone: touch grass. Plus, they unpack the AI takeover, the science of BO, and share their 2023 pop culture predictions. There’s a lot going on…enjoy!  Highlights Channel: https://www.youtube.com/c/BrookeAndConnorHighlights  Email us at [e-mail] !! If you listen on Apple Podcasts, go to: https://apple.co/bandc Head to https://PIAVPN.com/bandc and get an 82% discount and 3 extra months completely for free! Go to https://zocdoc.com/BANDC and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at https://betterhelp.com/BANDC and get on your way to being your best self. Go to https://UncommonGoods.com/bandc to get 15% off your next gift. B+C IG: https://www.instagram.com/bncmap/ B+C Twitter: https://twitter.com/bncmap TMG Studios YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/tinymeatgang TMG Studios IG: https://www.instagram.com/realtmgstudios/ TMG Studios Twitter: https://twitter.com/realtmgstudios BROOKE https://www.instagram.com/brookeaverick https://twitter.com/ladyefron https://www.tiktok.com/@ladyefron  CONNOR https://www.instagram.com/fibula/ https://twitter.com/fibulaa https://www.tiktok.com/@fibulaa Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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CBS is calling. Do you want to answer CBS? No. Can I answer? Hi, this is Brooks' assistant. No, don't say it. You're my assistant. Hi, this is Brooks assistant.

Connor. Oh, my God. I can't listen to that. Oh, I think she's at the office right now. I think she might be in a meeting. Do you mind just leaving it? I have to hear from her in order to leave it. Okay, let me go grab her. One second.

Okay, thank you. Hi, how are you? How was it? Brooke, Brooke, you have a call. Here, Brooke. Hello? Hi, Brooke, this is your CVS delivery. Oh, hi. I'm so sorry I'm not home.

I know. That's what your assistant just said. He said that I could leave it, but I needed her verbal permission. Yes, please. That would be great. And you trust it right here by your door. Is there any place you want to do that? That's great by my door. It's great. Okay.

Thank you so much. It has a piece of tape with 20 by it, correct? Yes. Yes. Okay. Thank you so much, bro. Thank you so much. Have a good day.

Yeah, you too. What a sweet woman. She did not deserve to deal with your assistant today. No, she really did deserve my assistant. She really didn't not need you put on hold. Hey guys, welcome back to B&C MAP. Guess what we're doing today? What?

We're making a pee. We are making a pee. I love making a pee with you. P. Yeah. I also love making that, I love making a big pee with you. Yeah. Hey guys.

Welcome back. We're just going to dive right in today. We kind of had a backward situation because we just watched the O'Caroline music video that just came out. Just came out. Because Brooke wasn't able to proceed with making the podcast, making the, what, being. wasn't able to proceed with making a pee until she was able to consume that. So I think for the next

couple, hopefully seconds, maybe it could bleed into minute. She's going to be decompressing. And we recorded us watching it and that we're putting it in the bonus because we're not allowed to put it in the main because of copyright, etc. Legal issues. So I'm

recovering from that. Connor's going to intro us while I ground myself. Yeah, ground yourself. You know what? Let me post that on my Instagram story that it's out. Just kind of so everyone knows. And you can intro. Okay. Hello.

Hey guys. Welcome back to B and CMAP. Where'd it go? We are making a PTA today. How many times can I say that? I have no idea. So I just want to dedicate this episode. I just write from the top to our boy noodle who passed tragically.

And you know what? I guess today would be a bone day. Aw. Noodle. Rest in power. That's so sad. It's so, so sad. Nothing like a dog dying to really remind you that life is trash.

I'm pretty much ready to, so big, big hats off to nudes today. We'll have to figure out a new way to figure out if it's a good day or not. I think maybe how clammy your hands is a good transition. Yes. That's a really good point. They're not very clammy. I think it's going to be a good day between the clamless hands. It's crazy to feel you when you don't feel like a corpse.

I know. I know. Now we can hold hands for the whole episode even if you want. Totally. Yeah. I. Wow, between clamless hands and O'Caroline. And we're doing something fun together tonight. Yeah.

This day is going to be full of bones. And yeah, speaking of bones. I'm so excited for tonight. It's going to be awesome. You'll see you guys. I was just thinking about dogs and like we've come so far with AI. Like we've seen a man to the moon, but we can't make dogs live longer than 10 years. That doesn't seem right to me either.

Get a grip. What are we doing? This is the whole thing with the science thing where it's like scientists have unearthed a new disease that's been locked away in the Arctic ice caps for that millions years. Stop doing that. Make the dogs live 20 years. And can I just say that you know who the only... I'm not sick. No, I know, I know, I know.

You know who the only person on this earth who has tried to do something about the tragedy of dog's passing is the only person on the planet. Wait, can I try to guess? Who has tried to intervene. Lady Gaga? No. It's someone that clone their dog, right? No, it's not. Who?

Nathan Fielder. Oh, Jesus. No, you know exactly what I'm going to say. Or you have no idea. But you're going to like what I'm going to say. say. Nathan Fielder, one of his business propositions, was when dogs die, he had the idea of making a video from the dog to the children of the dogs that had just passed saying,

oh, sorry I died. Brooke, it is so weird that you said that today. Because. Can we pull up that clip? A genius idea. A message from the dogs in the afterlife to ease the pain of the children experiencing the law. So to set this up, and we'll play the audio. I just set it up.

For audio only. Oh, yeah. You did. You set it up. Yeah. I was coughing. Well, I guess if those of you don't know what Nathan for you is, he makes these business propositions to help local businesses.

And this was for, I don't even know what the business was, but basically he was just trying to help children cope with the loss of their pets. Yeah. And this was his idea. Can we skip to the, because I think he sets it up as well. Oh, well, we can just. Oh, it's right there in the. middle, I believe.

Yeah. Yeah. That little kid. Oh, right before the... Right, yeah. Go to the... Yeah. Yeah.

The beginning of this scene. He's going to play this. Yeah, perfect. Yeah, he was helping a local animal hospital. Mm-hmm. Helping a local animal hospital. The concept was to make a video of the pet while it's still alive. He'll go ahead and set it up as well for us.

I hired the only voice actor that responded to my Craigslist ad to be the dog. But when we showed it to the owner's child... Oh, it's me. Maddie. So sorry, I died. Genius. I miss you so much. I'm happy here. So I'm not coming back.

I miss. My dad doesn't talk like that. So that kids are racist, for sure. Well, there's a little bit of cognitive dissonance. Sure. He's okay. He's okay. It's fine.

Grief and loss is complicated, and he's just grappling with those emotions. I think he's more so trying to digest the voice because he feels like he never knew the dog. Well, I imagine it's jarring. to hear your dog speak regardless of the voice. Well, you don't know. It's weird that he's obviously

assuming the dogs. Do you feel like you would know what your dog's voice sounded like if he started to speak? Yeah. 100%. Australian Shepherd. I bet he has an Australian voice. Yeah. Oh. Also, that clip got so

ground into my mind in the same way that like a song gets stuck in your head. Ew, I'm still wearing my glasses. Sorry. No, that's fine. Whenever you're done. Go ahead. That sound got so like beaten into my head

because I watched that clip so many times who was so funny that I started like a song would get stuck in your head. I started saying things like that. No, I showed it to my Uber today. That's why I was saying that's why I was saying

it is so weird you said that because I go, sorry I'm late. He was about to pull away and I was like, I'll be right there. It's not my fault that Uber shows up right when I call it. I'm not used to that. Right.

We're used to a 10-minute thing. I was still in the shower. Right. So I walked down, I go, sorry, I'm late. That little phrase got stuck in my head and I need it to be gone. Yeah. There's things like that that I need a little, little, little, I chip her to the brain for, little lobotomy. Little lobotomy, never heard anybody.

I've been said that. Bring back lobotomies. I've been saying bring back. There's no reason we shouldn't have a casual brain surgery. I want to clip out little pieces of my. My brain. 100%. That make me try to scroll on a book, a physical book.

Well, I just think, like, for depression and anxiety, like... Oh, that. Like, yeah, that just, like, rewire something. Like, it's not hard. You know? Because clearly, it's like, you know the issue. You know, there's not enough serotonin being produced, whatever. Inject more into my brain.

Like, I'm done with taking a pill every day. Put, like, a juice in my... Through my ear. Yeah. Like, it's not. hard. Science is in its flop era. For real.

Here's my vitamins I'm taking right now. Oh, walk us through those. Oh my God. I got the wrong ones and the ones I have to take my like multides or the size of like a chode. Horse pills. Like they're so fat and dry. I don't want to take it.

Can you swallow all at once? You want me to try? I'll try anything once. Have you tried it before? No. This is seven pills. My dad could swallow, my dad could swallow like,

like 15 of those. My daddy's got a gold tooth. Are we making sense today at all? I don't know. Okay, I'll try to do it. Why don't you, okay, no, let me walk through what everything is really like. So, because the biggest argument

that I got in recently online with Mr. Gage Gomez on Instagram. Is he someone I should know or just a? Yeah, he's a, just a cool dude that I met on the internet. But he was, he's like really smart and he's like in med school. I'm pretty, actually in med school. And he posted his multivitamins and I was like, you don't have to take those.

You're like a healthy guy. He's like ripped to the gods. Yeah, because you always say that your doctor friends tell you like if you're healthy, you don't need vitamin. Unless you're deficient in something, you don't need to be taking like a vitamin to and I'm going to get ripped the shreds again. I don't know if that's true, but I believe everything I'm told.

Right, but now I see you're taking vitamins. So someone told you you should take vitamins and now you... Well, if you haven't heard me absolutely coughing up a lung, I'm trying to get ahead of this because I'm already behind it. So let me walk you through these. And I'll tell you, sorry, I lied. I think that like these are like the good ones. So, okay, there is two vitamin,

there is two vitamin either D or C. Those are C Sunny D I think they're D No I think D is a Like the orange This is the In oranges it's found in

Yeah that's C D is a like Oily one From the sun Like a wet No these aren't wet They're very Yeah those are C

I'm having So these are both C I'm taking double C Because it helps with immunity You're just gonna pee it out The extra No I feel like I might be deficient right now Because of the way

Anyways These are These are lines main They help with memory and nerve support Cool Are your nerves shot? Your nerve support in my brain This is

HTC which helps with serotonin Synapsis Yeah that sounds good Yeah production Because I've been sleeping very much It's a busy week These are my wellness pills These have been checked out by my doctor friends

and I'll take it. Okay. I was in it out way over here. So anyways, these are what I take only when I'm really sick. And do you take any vitamins just daily regularly? Lines, Maine. Because that's not something your body naturally produces? No, it's a mushroom.

It's a grandad mushroom. Oh, okay. Yeah. But it's not been studied or approved by anything, but they also can't say that it's bad. Right. Cool. But I got in an argument with him, and he's way smarter than me. And I was like, you don't need to be taking that.

He's like, yeah, you do. Uh-huh. I was like, what color's your pee? And he's like, what color is your pee? Tell me what color your pee is. It's probably orange, but he said it was fine. Because if you're taking like too much extra stuff, your pee will be. Like a brighter color because you're just.

My pee's a brighter color when I take my vitamins. I thought that was like good, a good sign. No, it just means that you're disposing of them. Yeah. darn. But that's okay. That's something to ask Hank Green. Hank, why is my pee bright orange?

Well, your apartment was built over a nuclear plant. Hank, can I say something real quick about science and Hank? I would love that. So, someone's calling me. Oh, crap. Oh, no. Who is it? Well, I think it's CVS because I got my prescription delivered and they said,

make sure you're home. And I'm not. That's okay. I'll figure it out later. But in Nick Kroll's stand-up special, which is, by the way, everyone should watch, he says that if you spread your butt cheeks apart, you won't, like, hear your fart. It'll be just like, that's true. Because what causes the fart is your butt cheeks vibrating together to create that farting sensation sound. Yeah, what do you think it is?

Hank. A voice box? Hank. No, Connor. Hank responded to a clip of Nick Kroll's stand-up special. stitch it and said actually it's not your butt cheeks that make the vibrating fart sound it's your actual butt hole sphincter and what's happening when you spread your butt cheeks apart is you're actually also spreading your butt hole so that's why it's not making that much of a sound

so he was able to correct nick stand-up special refart Thank you so much, Brooke, for letting us know. Feel free to watch that video on Hank's channel. So how did we end up to fart? Fartgate? I think it's just science. Just science in general has let us to fart gate. I have another science corner, but we should do a weekend recap first.

Yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, my God. Yeah, you're right. Science can wait. Science is not going anywhere. We will always have science. Every day, I believe, less and less in science.

CBS is calling again. Do you want to answer CBS? No. Can I answer? Hi, this is Brooks' assistant. No, don't say it. You're my assistant. Hi, this is Brooks assistant, Connor.

Oh, my God. I can't listen to that. Oh, I think she's at the office right now. I think she might be in a meeting. Do you mind just leaving it? I have to hear from her in order to leave it. Okay, let me go grab her. One second.

Okay, thank you. Hi, how are you? How was it? Brooke, Brooke, you have a call. Here, Brooke. Hello. Hi, Brooke, this is your CVS delivery. Oh, hi.

I'm so sorry I'm not home. I know. That's what your assistant just said. He said that I could leave it, but I needed her verbal permission. Yes, please. That would be great. And you trust it right here by your door?

Is there any place you want to hear? That's great by my door. It's great. Okay. Thank you so much. It has a piece of tape with 20 by it, correct? Yes. Yes.

Okay. you so much for us thank you so much have a good day what a sweet woman she didn't want she did not deserve to deal with your assistant today deserve my assistant she really she really didn't not need you put on hold but i did know how you are with phone calls i'm glad i know i never answer my phone and honestly i'm really glad you did that because otherwise she wouldn't have left it do you have like a little suction cup for your ear thing today do you have either of your ear plugs in i didn't for the call oh Because I couldn't hear her.

Wow. Good job assistant. Thanks. I have always wanted to be someone's assistant. I would be so damn-ymp-ed at it. I feel like most assistants don't answer the phone. I'm like, this is Brooks assistant. Correct me if I'm wrong, though.

I've never had to do it because I've never been an assistant. Right. But I was a really good intern. You were, you did a good job today. You got the job done. I kind of went above and beyond because I had to go find you in the office. Yeah. Thank you, by the way.

Which I never know where you are because your little legs take your soap bars. They really do. They really do. You're like a cockroo. coach. So the weekend was great. I think what? I really want to hear about your stand-up. Oh my God. I feel like it's been, I feel like it's been a full... That was like a week ago. That was Thursday. And I've been like not asking you about it because I was waiting for the pod.

Yeah. Okay, guys, this is bizarre. It makes me want to poop my pants even talking about it. So like I agreed while having six beers, five or six maybe at a Polish person. bar in Santa Monica that I would go on a set in front of a lot of people and do a stand-up show. And I've been saying that I need to do this. And I did it. And I wrote a set on Thursday during the day and then performed it at Hollywood Improv that evening fully like went up on stage blacked out. Do you not remember it.

Crowd was really nice and cool. Were they cracking up? Yeah, they laughed at everything. I actually was like, I'm going to look like such a noob. I'm going to. I just told the book. and at the beginning, I don't think that I'm gonna be able to fill up my whole time

because I'm gonna be talking too fast because I don't think anyone's gonna laugh. But because I had to wait for laughing to stop, it made it the whole way. Can you give us like what was your best joke? Yeah, I was talking about how Uber jokes always do really well. I think our clip from me lying to my Uber is kind of going

VRL right on TikTok. Good job, Connor. Thanks. Well, that's a, Good story. I might try to integrate that. Yeah. So people that, there's a couple people in the crowd that had came up to me before and

they're like, love the podcast. I'm like, you're going to know half this set. So just keep, like, just laugh for me, please. But there was a, there was a joke about my Uber picking me up because I can never find my car, which is why I Uber did here this morning. And it all can be, like, probably blamed on the Adderall shortage because, like, I park my car. And I basically, like, every time I get out of my car, I'm just like, see you and I see you.

maybe. Right. Because I don't know if it's going to get toad stolen or if I will even remember where I parked you. So I couldn't remember where I parked you so I Ubered there. Basically like my, this, I wrote the whole set and then took this Uber there and it was the scariest ride of my life, but I got there like 10 minutes earlier than the ETA. So like the, like, it was all worth it because I've never seen an ETA slash 10 minutes off.

And the reason it got slash is because he went, you've heard of going right on red. Yeah. But have you heard of going left on red? My man took a left on red. And I basically like, when I said left on red so people are laughing I'm like

that only happens when I text my crush left on red but I had I thought of that on the stage good job and it's just when you're in a setting

where someone has purchased tickets to see you they laugh a lot more than like when we're telling jokes just normally but that was fun anyways I did that

I have another one coming up I'm not gonna say win or where can I can't if you want to um but that was really cool again like fully blacked out i think it went really well that's so sick how did you feel like right before like when you were walking up stage are you ready to oh well right before um the emcee got my first and last name wrong and then said you know him from youtube so i was

like there's another that has to be me but i cannot tell and so i just sat in my chair because i didn't want to like go up in front of someone and then he's like and i was like so that that's not my name or what I do. So forgive me. Because on the door of the Hollywood Improv, by the way, you know who else was on the docket that night? That went on at 10. Who?

I went on at 8. Bill Burr and Tiffany Haddish. Oh, my God. That is insane. Yeah. I'm so glad it went. Swimmingly. Do you feel like when you were up there,

are you like, okay, this is my thing now? Like, I love doing stand-up. I think just like when there was like no expectations, because I was like, it's either going to work. I'm going to get blackout drunk as soon as I get off the stage. And it worked. So I don't know. I was like, it felt a lot better.

I think I need to do more shows to make sure that that wasn't a flu. Right. Well, I don't, how could it be? Because here we have unlimited time to explain a joke and get to a bunch line. There, it's like if it doesn't land, you just go. But I think that's part of your charm is like you don't let it go. You have to because you only get a couple minutes. Right.

I guess that's true. Yeah. So that was good. I'm super stoked, too. Should I bring a sign? No. Really? Yeah.

I'm gonna get throw-upy probably again. This is a much bigger crowd. It's 200 people. I'll come in disguise. I'm going to be Caroline. Caroline. Yeah. Caroline O.

Caroline comma. Oh. Yeah. Wow. I'm so glad it went well. I was like. so clammy for you. Yeah, it was, it was, I mean, I was texting you before.

I was like, I just like... You were texting me nonstop before and then I did not hear from him. I was like, it must have gone really well if he's not. Well, they also had me sitting like in front of everybody, so whatever. But then left from there and went to Cody's DJ said. Oh, how was that? He was nervous. I've never seen him nervous.

Yeah. It was his first one ever. And Dylan Francis like came out with him, which was cool. Is he an aspiring DJ? He's good. He has so many aspirations. The guy doesn't stop. It's beyond.

He doesn't stop. Honor to call him our boss. Yeah. Talk about Hobby King. Uh-huh. Hobby Lobby that one. Hobby Lobby, this guy. And then, get this.

So that was Thursday. Friday didn't do anything. Saturday was the U.S. soccer team, which is we got knocked out. Soccer, to me, is like an argument with like a close friend or like a roommate like you're going to argue back and forth and back and forth for two hours

and then nothing's going to happen. Right. You know? Like no one's going to take the trash out. You're just going to argue or maybe someone does but it ends up really I don't know if that made sense that analogy but like these games I waited I got to this bar I told you at 630 in the morning. Why was it so early? Was it in a different country? Because it's in Qatar. Cutter. Sure. Qatar. I don't know.

Anyways, that was a blast. I love these like... Guitar. Yeah. It was like cutter like scissors. No, it's Qatar. That was fun. It's so funny, like...

Do you want to take your vitamin instead of playing with them? They're kind of like fun little stones. I'll try to take them all at once, sure. But it's cool when everybody decides like one day when the U.S. is playing. Yeah. Maybe I'll wear a full American flag outfit. You know, it's like fun like little thing.

and then everyone goes back to normal. Is that what you wore? No, I don't have anything American. Someone gave me a bandana at the end, though. It was kind of fun. That's sweet. It's kind of fun to cosplay as like someone from America. America.

Yeah. That is really fun. Yeah, we lost. But when we scored one goal because we did, it was really fun for like 14 seconds. That sounds fun. Yeah, everyone's jumping around. I'm hugging someone I don't know.

That's a blast. That's like when I wish I liked sports, just like the camaraderie. You don't have to like sports. It's like being at a live concert. You like the song. Someone else likes a song, that's enough. It's like being in the grocery store.

If you're a white person, if you're in the same aisle, you do the knot. Uh-huh. How are you? Right. That's enough. Right. It's this sense of... It's like I don't even care enough to nod.

Oh. Well, you're from the East Coast. I don't think you guys do that. Like, be friendly? Yeah. That's true. I remember one time when I was little, I was like seven or something. I was at Disneyland and Popper.

pop was like said her grandfather yeah said hi to someone um just like when he was walking by them and i was like why did you just do that like what's do you know them do you have a second family i was like who was that and he's like i don't know and i was like what's wrong with you like i just like it's not it's not first nature no the way that i'll be at a like a somewhere old navy trying on jeans with my dad and i come out and he's talking to like who i assume is his friend from college. O'Connor, you got to meet Dan over here. I'm like, so I was in there for 90 seconds. It's not a typical. So who is Dan? We just met. Okay. Well, that's, it's weird. Well, I've gone from having friends only from the East Coast. Like, I never knew anybody Southern, like, at all. And then moving here,

all my friends are Southern. And they are so much friendlier and just have like a completely different set of manners, I guess. It's, it's weird. It's lovely. It was a culture shock for me not to know my neighbors when I moved to California. Wow. Like my next door neighbors, I don't know who you are. That's a weird thing for us. The culture shock for me is just like everybody on the East Coast is more just like they could sit on the couch all day. Yeah. And here it's like up and at him. Yeah. And that's, whoa, for me. It's because the weather's always so fucking nice. I guess it's like, yeah, let's do stuff. Like it's such a tough thing to complain about if you don't live in California. But like,

it kind of sucks. I'm just like. be gross out for a little bit. It's been kind of gross recently. It is the most absolutely gorgeous day I've ever seen outside today. I don't remember. Do you want to hear the most absurd thing I've ever seen?

Uh-huh. So I go to run yesterday and I'm out and it's not cold. It's in the 60s. I'm wearing a shorts or a shirt. And I run by this guy. He stops me in my tracks. Normal looking dude.

Great pace like booking it. He was wearing a turtleneck. Huh. Like an athletic one? No, not. It wasn't alo. It wasn't a performance running turtleneck. It was like a nice cable net J. Cruz sweater turtleneck.

And it makes you wonder like, you know, you just never know what someone could be going through. Right. That could lead them to wearing a turtleneck on a run. So check on your friends. Right. Check on your friends. That's an interesting visual. Yeah.

I feel like I've so, I didn't do anything this weekend, by the way. I did go to. Great. my Pac-Man bar for the World Cup and just played Pac-Man for six hours. But, oh, I'm back in my weed era. Ooh, cool. Which is awesome. Not fully back, but getting back.

And so... Keep talking. I'm going to take my pills. Okay. I was having a good experience being high this weekend. But I had a bad case of, you can't do it. You can't swallow too many. Okay.

Just take a few at a time. Go ahead. I have a bad case of, like, high online shopping. And it's like when you're high, it's like everything looks like this is the best thing I've ever seen in my life. You would not believe the things I ordered while watching White Lotus on Sunday night. I ordered. Eating suits? No, betting.

So my comforter is brown and white, like, floral. So I ordered Starfish Colorful Butterfly Sheets and black and white

checkered pillows So I'm looking forward to them coming And kind of setting that That up Because I was like This is so

Victoria Paris What about the very Kind of subtle Nature tones Earth tones Of the White Lotus Hotel in Italy gave you

gave you black and white checker and butterfly vibe. I also ordered a print of a cat. So you were really high. Soaring, flying, not a start in heaven I couldn't reach at that time. And everything should come in tomorrow, all from Urban Outfitters, of course. Also, giant eyeball pillow. Oh, giant eyeball pillow and a giant frog pillow. So I'm excited for those to come in, and I'm excited for you to kind of see my new set up.

Yeah, that'll be a movie. But I think that's all I did. I think that's all I did. I like that liar that when they're getting all dressed in that costume design there. Yeah. I have been drinking those cans. Oh, the wheat. They don't do anything to me.

That is perfect for me. Really? Yeah, because if I want to have my second dinner, where I go to bed, they get me just hungry enough to have a grilled cheese. I also, like, can drink them and then go out and be social, and it, like, kind of takes that, like, social anxiety thing off. And people are asking, like, are they actually good? They work for me because I get paying.

make attacks when I smoke weed. Uh-huh. I can't relate. Oh my God. I'm so freaking gross today. People burp. Speaking of... Wait, wait, wait.

Before you say, while we're still on the weed thing, we sat down. So this is the last time I smoked weed was like three weeks, four weeks ago. Uh-huh. My friends are really good at smoking weed. Right. I walk over to his house, sit down. We decided to watch Ted. and we're sitting there.

The bear movie? The bear movie. I'd never seen it. That's a fun one. Hi, I bet. Not when you take three hits with a joint and you're me. So I sit down on his bean bag. I take three hits.

We're four minutes into the movie. And my friend Kylie goes, oh my God, it's over? The opening credits are rolling. And I was like, oh, I guess I'll. And I go to get up and I was like, oh, I'm falling asleep. I'm going to like, I'm going to go to my room

because I don't want to fall asleep. out in my living room. Right. I sit up and I go, oh my God, this isn't my house. And then I was like, is it my house? It was freaky. It freaked me out.

And then I was like, okay, I need to get past us, need to get past this. And then I was like, I'm stuck like this forever. That's the part about being high that I can't. I have to do it in my own home because it's like, if I'm somewhere else, it's like I will be stuck here. Like, I don't know how I'm ever going to get home. I have two wolves inside of me.

We all have two wolves. One of them is saying, give it 10 minutes. you pussy and the other one's saying you're gonna die right and you're stuck like this in limbo well whenever I get that feeling they're just kind of barking at each other did I ever tell you I have a voicemail on my phone from my therapist when I get

from when I get too high and I feel like I'm stuck it's a voicemail we're going this will pass all emotions are temporary and I'm just like in a room with my friends and I'll just like blare my therapist's voicemail

that's a red flag for them oh brook Oh, God. Brooks. They know I'm going down when I bring out the voicemail. Brooks gone goblin mode. Yeah. But the voicemails bring really useful

other friends have requested that I play it for that. When I used to smoke weed in college, like I do now, I would screenshot a text to myself and make it my screensaver that said, you have nothing due,

you have no tests coming up. You are allowed to be high right now. Because I would always be like, oh, crap, I need to like work on stuff. I need to get ahead. But, and then I'd read that, be like, oh my God, chill and enjoy this. I love writing notes to yourself.

Like, I used to have, remember in, like, high school when all those, like, poop books were really in at Urban Outfitters? No. Where it was, like, what does your poo say about you kind of stuff or, like, bathroom note? Like, it was just, like, bathroom books were so in. Okay, well, there was this one, like, poop book where it was, like, you could, like, diary your poops. Cool. And I would write letters to myself when I was, like, going through the, the, the, wringer of a stomach ache to be like

if you don't have a stomach ache right now you need to be so thankful because you don't know what you're going through right now and you need to appreciate every moment that you don't have a stomach ache yeah that's like every time I pull out of my driveway and I don't hit that biker that I hit that one time I'm like another day without hitting a biker again

it's just like hard like when you have a stomach kick it's like wow like I will appreciate every second of my life that I don't have a stomachache and then you forget to until the next time you have a stomachache. Take it for granted. Yeah. Sorry.

When we were talking about being high, I was like, you went Goblin Mode. Did you know that they made that? The Oxford Dictionary made that the Word of the Year? Can you explain that? Because I don't, I've never heard anyone say Goblin Mode ever. So Goblin Mode, I'm pretty sure. So Goblin Mode chosen as Oxford Word of the Year for 2022,

which is this year that we're living in. Right. I've already moved on in 2020. Okay, so Goblin Mode, I'm pretty sure was created on Twitter. And someone made a fake news article saying, Julia Fox has gone Goblin Mode on Kanye or something. It was like something really weird, and it went mega viral,

and then people started defining Goblin Mode. So here's what they wrote CNN. As you read this, look around. Are you still in bed? Are there piles of clothes and takeout food boxes strewn across the floor? Do you have chip crumbs on your sheets? Have you broken your self-care routine more times a new care to count? Do you not even care?

If so, you might already be. be in goblin mode chosen by the public as the 2022 oxford word of the year is it just mean depressed yeah oh i'm gonna be goblin mode all day every day yeah okay interesting so i thought that that was interesting this is a public vote though so social media can portray and idealized versions of self-improven from walking at 5 a m and drinking a green smoothie to keeping a journal exercising and planning for your weekly meal prep that era might may be on its way out and its place is god Goblin mode, the opposite of trying to better yourself. What?

I don't know. That's awesome. Good luck to everyone in Goblin mode. I don't feel like that makes sense for the word of the year, because I've never heard it. It's a public vote, so it's just people having fun. Oh, okay, sorry. I can't believe you haven't heard it. We're in, like, really, really different news cycles.

I knew about Goblin mode from its inception. When you were talking about stuff that we should talk about on the pod and just giving pop culture stuff, I did not know one thing that you were saying. Okay. If you want to pick something you explain to me. Well, I have a couple things I want to explain to you,

but I really, really want to talk about this AI photo trend that's going around. Okay, and I really want to talk about the science of VO, but you can go first. That's perfect.

Okay, so when we were talking about dogs that should live forever, like we are working on AI. Artificial intelligence should be just inside a dog. It should like teach it to learn and grow and regrow its cells so that it can live forever. AI is not these photos that you guys are plugging

into the internet. That is not, like, I know that that's technically AI, but that is a Snapchat filter that you're paying $8 for. It's worrying me that everyone's like, artificial intelligence. That is a filter. Like, I know that, like, it draws from different stuff. Right.

But you're uploading 27 photos and it's giving you a couple to post. It's just frustrating me. It worries me that. Maybe it's an umbrella term. Spectrum? I think it's just a, yeah, it is. You're right. It's a catch-all, but it's just like, use it so,

somewhere else, I guess. It's weird what we've chosen to, one, use AI for and two, spend $8 on. That's like a meal. Yeah. Go eat. Do you think the robot that delivered my postmates the other day was AI? Well, unless it's like, I think that's just a program thing. I don't think it's like learning from itself. I think artificial intelligence. That's the future by the way. Like that gives me the hebie-jeebies to see a robot crossing the street to deliver me my postmates and me having to go up to the robot, unlock him or her or them, and get my food out of its... Pussy? It's...

Back. Out of its... Stomach. I don't know what. Out of its robusty. Clock him back up and say, thanks so much. Have a good day. We have...

And send him on his way... Them on their way. That's... He be Gbis. I like that. That's not artificial intelligence. It's programmed with the... It's a GPS.

That's like, like, I feel like... I'm living in the future. I love those little things. They're called Coco in Santa Monica, but... This was not Coco. Coco walked alongside you on the sidewalk and stopped and waits for the crosswalk and then crosses the street. We are living among genuine robots and no one seems to be batting an eye. Because it's cute.

It's scary. There's no way those little wheeled creatures scare... No, they do. Because it's like, what's next? You know what should scare you? No one's going to have to do anything soon. You know what she scare you? Huh.

Your friends that paid eight. to get a couple photos of them and medieval garb. That scares me so much less than the robot. And climate change. It scares me so much less in the robot. Because there's also that thing Ryan was talking about where it's like you can just tell, what is it? You can tell

some sort of device to just like write you something and it will? Yeah, the AI writing tool. Yeah, you can just be like write me. He was like write me a thank you note for my wedding and it just came out with a gorgeous thank you note. We just pulled it up. Okay, can we can we write in? Opening line for a hinge match.

Opening line for a hinge match. Yeah, I'll send. And it's going to write. I'll send one. It's going to write an opening line for a hinge match. Let's see. It is cooking up. Let him cook.

Let him cook. Him or her or them. Man, the amount of contracts that I'm being sent lately to sign. That's lovely. Yeah, I should read them. It's currently writing one. Do you think it, I guess it knows what hinge is? Should we have said?

dating up? No, because I think that Hinge and this AI are probably cousins like it knows about it. I don't think I have any matches. Well, it'll still just pull it up. Was it just cooking or something?

You want to hear the most disgusting thing a boy on Hinge said to me? Yes. It's not that disgusting. It's not, it was just like creeped me to the moon and back. Yeah. Okay.

He responded to a picture from my Instagram that was me in a sweater vest. Sure. And the caption of the photo on my Instagram was, you know what they say about girls who knit their own sweater vest, dot, dot, dot, dot, dot, dot. And he responded, what did they say about girls who need their own sweater vest? Fine. I said, you know what they say. Dot, dot, dot, dot, dot. And he said,

I'm sobbing, begging, please tell me what they say and I never answered. And then he said, what do you do, Brooke, other than tease? No. Unacceptable. You are kind of teasing him. Ew. That's what flirting is. It's kind of teasing.

That's not flirting. That's... Ew. You're on hinge. You would say that to a girl. You would say what do you do other than tease? Nope. Yeah, so then that's that.

I shouldn't be the standard for what people should say on hinge. Why wouldn't you say that? Because there's something wrong with it. Because there's a little bit of missing social cues. I agree. But it's not creepy. It's so creepy. No, maybe he just.

doesn't have the speaking of that. What? I got canceled yesterday. Oh, an error occurred. Oh, it was still cooking up our... That's okay. Maybe try right opening line

for a dating app match? I don't know. I think it's one of those things where a bunch of people are using it. Oh, sorry. No, because that's what happened on that other AI server. Okay, so

I got soft canceled yesterday because I said put that we should put this little freak and we should drop this little freak off at a white lotus and it was Norman Bates from Bates Motel. Good tweet makes complete sense. Makes total sense.

He is a murderer that kills people and poisons people, et cetera. Someone wrote in and said, wow, calling an autistic doctor a little freak. I'm like, you're thinking of the good doctor where this actor plays an autistic doctor.

I'm talking about the murderer. Who poisons people? And your screenshot was from... Was from episode one of Bates Motel. And he's wearing wired headphones and she goes, by the way, wired headphones are the autistic accessory. I go, I look at my phone with my wired headphones kind of blowing in the wind.

And I go, it's not the first time someone's like, I think you're autistic. Right. It won't be the last. No, certainly won't. But I'm just like, oh. And then I had... Unfortunately, to sick the dogs on her in the replies.

And she said, I owned up for my mistakes already. I was wrong. I was like, well, you should have done your research. Delete your account. Delete your account. I blocked her. I left her. She's able to correct me and she goes, Connor, are you autistic?

I don't know. Maybe. I don't know. I'm wearing wired headphones lady. She did apologize though because she was blatantly wrong and sent three. very offensive tweets out to me. And I won't be putting up with that. Can I say what I got soft canceled before?

Do you think I'll get soft canceled again? Remind me what it is? I said on the podcast that I enjoyed the clip of Maddie Healy kissing a guy on stage and someone commented that I was queer fetishizing. And I said, oh, sorry, I meant to say, ew. That's homophobic. Yeah, he basically, he was, I was, I was. was like would you rather me be homophobic that was my implication with my response which i tweeted

which by the way such a fun tweet did great because i'm in the right yeah and you're wrong touchgrass might i suggest touchgrass is i would encourage a lot of people to touchgrass did you see people are trying to cancel brittney brosky for not having harry styles in her spotify rap you guys saw touchgrass may i suggest it's so funny such a burn that's like a big like sixth grade burn touchgrass It's like... I would like to put touch grass on some merch. Might I suggest you touch grass? Brooke.

Merch idea. Who wants touch grass merch? Let us know. Who wants... No, I can't say that. Sorry. Whatever you're about to say. Who wants wired headphones merch?

Who wants a B&C wired headphones? That's good. We will probably get in trouble from someone from that. But that's fine. That's fine. We know our hearts. We know our hearts. Okay, I really want to talk about

I want to talk about B.O. Okay. I just was wondering a lot like why have we evolved to think that B.O. is a bad smell when deodorant is a relatively new invention and we've been smelling like B.O. for millennials and millennials.

Like that was such a natural smell. I don't know. Like why would we think that's a bad smell? to me it smells bad of course to 99% of people it smells bad yeah so why but why why does it smell bad why do we think it smells bad I don't know hey guess what

the scientists that found that disease that they dug out of the ice focus on our armpits for a second right why I just don't know why we would have evolved to think that's a bad smell when there's no because I googled like we think things smell bad because it means danger oh like we obviously like

poop it smell bad Circling back to poop because it's like you shouldn't really be near that because that's not good for you to be near. Totally fair. I respect that and I accept it. There's nothing dangerous about B.O. Why do we think that smells bad? I don't think that. Why are we putting deodorant on?

Some people are like, oh, I like this. I think it's just like person by person. No. I think anyone would say like I'm not a huge fan of the B.O. smell. And most people wear deodorant. Yeah. I mean like when I get in an Uber and the windows are up and I'm my eyes are watered. That's bad for me.

Like I don't like that. Why? I don't know. And might I ask why? Hank Green. Why don't we think BO smells good? Why do we think it smells bad? Why have we evolved to think that B.O. smells bad when it's been a natural smell since the dawn of time?

Is it just a consumerist thing? I can't even have this conversation because I don't know. Have we been conditioned to think that B.O. smells bad so that we buy deodorant? Is it a capitalist marketing strategy? We're being persuaded by Big Dio. Anyway, that's my... To avoid our B.O. And I was thinking about that a lot this weekend because I have moved forward with trying natural deodorant.

Didn't work. Did not work. I noticed it. I noticed it. I told you last time I tried it. Oh, yeah. I was looking around and people were looking at me. Yeah.

Oh, no, it's... I was in line at Chippole and I go, I'm going to... I'm going to... I'm gonna head out. Yeah. And I'll be back when I smell appropriately. Yeah.

Because I was like, there's no way that's me. There's no. Easy to think it would be the toilet. Life comes at you so fast, especially when you're spending double what you would spend on deodorant because you want to eventually have kids. Because apparently that makes you infertile.

And it's like, okay, I'll adopt because I can't smell like roadkill. Right. It's just not a realistic, it's not a realistic option. Fair. It was making me sick. Yeah. My own own.

No, I know. I was getting. So sick. I do think the deodorant, ultimately, the dependency on it actually makes your B.O. worse. Because sometimes I'll outgrow a deodorant. I have one friend and one friend of a friend that stopped, and they said it was really gross for a while. But now their armpits don't smell. They don't wear deodorant anymore. It's capitalism.

Explain that. It's capitalism. They sweat out the capitalism. Although I will say my armpits started smelling so bad in third grade, and I had never, used deodorant before. So like why? You know, it's like that was their natural rest of the way. You probably were just being exposed to capitalism and it started seeping out through your pits.

No, it was more so my teacher pulled me aside and said, I want to recommend a product to you. Very, very teen spirit. Yes. Ew. So gross to put like a fruity smell over your armpits. I want something that smells like black ice. Yeah. Cold and pure.

Totally. Um, okay, so Jesus. We have not gotten to one. Do pick one pop culture thing that you can teach me about because I didn't know any of them this week and then I want to

I want to give our pop culture predictions for what we're going to hear now. Oh yeah, okay. So I want to talk about these good morning America reporters that we're behind on this because we were in last week, but this all transpired over the course of like six days. So basically there's these two GMA

anchors, T.J. Holmes and Amy Robat that just got taken off air after people found out that they're actually in a secret relationship. How did they figure out that, by the way, Good Morning America I thought was an hour. They're on the third or fourth hour of Good Morning America shows, which by the way, wouldn't be in the morning. That goes on forever. That would be about 1 p.m. So, for us. So they would be going on at like

five in New York. no it's a it's a long process it's live so yeah i know okay um so anyways they're on oh oh okay so they ended up getting fired but the reason it all came out is because why are they fired for being in a relationship they didn't violate any protocol they said it hang on let me get there okay so i guess this guy okay hang on so this all blew up because and here's how This is gnarly. The guy's wife, current wife, sent a private investigator out to follow him.

Oh, they were married to other people? Yes. Oh. To follow him out on a trip he was going on. A photographer, he took pictures, gave them to her. She sold them to, like, TMZ and stuff to release, to blow it up. Okay. So, like, I don't think anyone would have really cared, but we were such media consumers

that it was like, ooh, someone's cheating, someone's cheating. What is the deal with us needing, what is the deal with 2022 and people cheating and us being like, yeah, give us more? Adam Levine got really lucky that someone cheated right after he did because his thing just got swept under the road. But like, I don't know. So anyways. Why do we care?

Yeah. We've always cared about that kind of stuff. Someone tweeted something really good and I want to see if I can pull it up. But basically, they got taken off air. Both of them did. It's probably just like bad. moral character. Well, it's a distraction for the other. But what a poor ratings decision, because

I want to watch the sexual tension on air. Suddenly, I'm tuning into Good Morning America, 3. I hear you. The fourth hour of Good Morning America. On Friday, while hosting the afternoon extension of Good Morning America with Roboc Holmes poked fun at about the great week the pair had. You know, it's too bad it's Friday, he said. It's been a great

week. Just want this one to keep going and going and going. Speak for yourself, Amy responded. I'm very excited about the weekend because they were going Oh, damn. How fun is that, though? Hot. Yeah, it's sexy. Mm-hmm.

I agree. So anyways, they've been fired. I'm sure that someone that's a little bit more progressive than them. First of all, whatever you do outside of the workplace, stay out of it. I guess since they, you know, but there's nothing in their contracts that's said they couldn't be in a relationship with their coworkers. Right. I guess it's just like they don't want cheaters. Yeah.

To be the face of the network. not the try guys like it's a it's a corporate environment you can't just fire people and yet at will right well maybe if they had that well contract i don't know i guess the nuances but watch this space because i find it very interesting and i feel like they could maybe sue but um i want to pull up this tweet about these good morning america people and can you talk for a second uh yeah let me look at my my CVS ordered was safely delivered by the way oh so the relationship didn't violate any policies as was reported earlier today in fact last week it was reported that they had a lot of staff support so a lot of people that worked

to them were like oh you guys are i like you guys together wow sorry but i think we as an Asian are starting to act completely insane about cheating yes because we're being fed it by the media because they're like you want more cheaters we're going to give you more cheaters that is like something that should be private unless his wife is like no i want to expose this cheating freak he's probably like all press is good press i'm on good morning america i know press we like to watch salacious things which brings me good word thank you which brings me to my next topic yeah that i did want to discuss in this episode i saw is it poop or b0 no it's not poop and b oh it's cannibalism oh great i saw bones and all yeah okay last night or two nights ago the new

timothy shallomay movie cannibal love story hang on i have not seen it And I'm just going to say this really quick. Say it. Do you think it's a little bit weird that Timothy Shalamee coming off of Call Me By Your Name with Army Hammer is doing a cannibal movie? So weird, but he was signed to it before the Army News dropped. Oh, it's been a while. It's been a while in the making.

It's with the same director as the guy that did call me by your name. This movie? Yeah. Ew. Ew. Ew. You're not going to give any spoilers, right? No.

But don't go. see it. Like that should not have been made. Like it felt like, here's what it felt like, it felt like it was a film for actual cannibalist serial killers and they got it on the black

market. They had paid to get like a snuff film and that's what they would see and they would be arrested for consuming that kind of content. Like it felt like it was actually like something that the people that are in criminal minds, the unsubs, the killers,

with like pay to get. You're giving me the babies. It was snuff film. It was so, I was like, oh my God, like this is what the world's come to. This is what people want to see. Scary. And I think the people that say it was like artistically done like film bros are either lying or have cannibalistic tendencies. I really believe that.

Like, everybody towards the end of the movie in my theater was laughing. Laughing? Laughing? Laughing because it was like this is like this is insane. Oh like as I laughing is like there's no fucking way like this is what we're watching. I don't like I don't know what's six I didn't see it. Whoa. But um.

Like I can't believe it went through like all of the screenings that it needed to go through to be a film. There was a someone tweeted. Literally people just eating each other and calling it an artsy romantic film. There was. No. There was someone that tweeted that's not like a influence or anything that she was just like, I'm going on a date by myself tonight going to go see the new Timothy Chalamee movie

Half an hour later He goes, what the fuck is wrong with people? I can't believe I just saw that by myself. Like the whole time I was just sitting there going, No. Oh God, no. Unacceptable. No.

And the woman in front of me was sitting there with her dog. Your dog should not be seeing this. Dog probably love bones and all. It seems like a dog's known. Because of the crunch. Oh, you would hate it. Speaking of misophomia. No. I'm not going to go see it.

No. I was never even thinking about it. You know what I don't like at all? Huh. The TikTok voice is like, I let my dog out on a walk. Here you go. I don't like the new ones.

The cartoon where people are filming their whole video in the cartoon. No, I don't know. I don't get it. I thought my phone was broken. I don't like it either. I'm fine with like the other like British girl that's old. I wish they would have just left it like that. Yeah, but I don't.

Here's my mom making her pasta. Every impression you do sounds like. Like Ross from Monstersink at first. I know, but that one sounds a little bit like the... I'm taking my... I'm going to my driver's head course. Watch me drive. Watch me parallel park.

That's the new Watch me whip. Watch me nay, nay. We're taking my grandma off-life support. I know. Watch us say our final goodbyes. That's like... I'm not... I don't...

Just use your voice. just your normal voice I just like don't talk about an approval process who was like let's approve this voice there should be an approval process for what people can write in that voice I think most things should go through

an approval process yes bro I agree just like our daily like routine I agree should be approved by some a higher up okay your natural deodorant has been rejected yeah it should be

okay we have to wrap up but can we really quickly do our pop culture predictions for 2023? Yeah, I didn't get to that minute. Okay. Well, I've got to, I think I have a few good ones. You all ready? For what I predict. I'm going to try to think of someone the spot. Okay. I think that Harry

Stiles was going to start knitting. He already did. No? No. I think he's going to start knitting or at the very least be in like a knitting campaign. Like be in a campaign photo shoot that'll have him knitting. Okay. Because I think one of everyone thinks

knitting is cool now I'd like to think that knitting club inspired that by the way someone on Reddit tried to cancel knitting club this week stay focused stay focused sorry this is okay um

yeah that's my prediction is that we're going to see Harry Styles X and knitting um lab rest in peace Kirstie Alley yeah because I was going to say someone is probably going to die in the first in January someone always dies in January well it comes in three so So three people are going to die in January?

One more, because we had noodle. Right. Well, it's not January. It's December. Okay. Well. I'm talking at 2023 now. Okay. Sorry. I think Lizzo's going to get pregnant. Oh. Or canceled.

Ooh. Opposite size of the spectrum. Yeah. I think that Pete Davidson is going to have an affair with Megan Markle. Oh, that's awesome. Mm-hmm. Remember when we started the rumor that Joe Biden was bisexual? I think we did that in the, our pilot that wasn't released. Oh.

Right? Or no? I don't know, but that was funny. It was really funny. Give me another one. Megan Fox is going to come out with a podcast. That's a good one. I think Jason Siddakis is going to get full canceled.

Because I think we were getting like inklings. of like his character is a little bit suspicious during that whole Olivia Wilde scandal with the salad. And now that Ted Lassow is so big, I think that people are going to be interested in uncovering more dirt.

And I think there is more dirt. I could see that happening to poor little Jenna Ortega, honestly. She got famous way too fast. Oh. I worry about her. Damn. You know she gained 10 million followers in a week?

That shouldn't happen to anyone. Just like a lot to take on that way. She already had 10 million followers. followers but to go from 10 million she was gaining a million 1.5 million a day I don't know how she went from looking like a teenager and like everything else she does to looking so young in Wednesday she looks young I think she looks a lot younger in Wednesday that she has than she has looked in previous someone tweeted about her and Pete Davidson ending up together oh and I was just like that is that's unacceptable I shouldn't put that energy out yeah because you never know

after he's done with Megan Markle. Oh my God. No. Ooh, scared myself. After the chat we had today. Okay, you ready for my last prediction? Lewis Capaldi is going to get a really, really, really hot girlfriend. And I think all women are hot and beautiful,

but I think he's going to end up with like a 10 out of 10 Victoria's Secret model kind of girl. Interesting. Because say it with me. All funny guys get hot model girls. And all funny girls get Glaxo proscriptions. Yes. So I'll leave you with that. All right.

That was good. That was good end. We were hopping over to the bonus episode, and I would love to see you there. I would too. We'll watch the O'Caroline music video. Yeah. Oh, Caroline. Uh, smooches.

Smooches. This week on close friends. Oh! I am dry-humping this person. Now I'm naked because of HBO Max. Do you want to explain the liver king to me? Because that's someone I also knew who he was. Is your interest in medieval time sexual?

I don't know. Maybe. Are you dressing up like a night? Shit on my ass. Sign up on TMG Studios. com.