Brooke and Connor Make A Podcast - Life Could Be Dream

Episode Date: July 11, 2024

SUBSCRIBE TO THE NEW BNC CHANNEL: https://bit.ly/45Pspyl   Ad Free & Bonus Episodes: https://bit.ly/3OZxwpr NEW MERCH: https://shoptmgstudios.com  This week, Brooke and Connor break down how life could be a dream if they didn’t get annoyed, plus the struggle of dealing with the collections office. Connor also gets emotional while fighting back tears.   Join our Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/groups/5356639204457124/  Get free shipping and 50% off your first box of fresh, healthy food at https://thefarmersdog.com/bandc.  Head to https://acorns.com/bandc or download the Acorns app to start saving and investing for your future today! Save money everyday with the McDonald’s app. Must opt in to Rewards.  Head to https://www.squarespace.com/BANDC to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using code BANDC. B+C IG: https://www.instagram.com/bncmap/ B+C Twitter: https://twitter.com/bncmap TMG Studios YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/tinymeatgang TMG Studios IG: https://www.instagram.com/realtmgstudios/ TMG Studios Twitter: https://twitter.com/realtmgstudios BROOKE https://www.instagram.com/brookeaverick https://twitter.com/ladyefron https://www.tiktok.com/@ladyefron  CONNOR https://www.instagram.com/fibula/ https://twitter.com/fibulaa https://www.tiktok.com/@fibulaa Hosted by Brooke Averick & Connor Wood, Created by TMG Studios, Brooke Averick & Connor Wood, and Produced by TMG Studios, Brooke Averick & Connor Wood. 0:00 Connor’s Drunk 1:12 Intro 1:32 Alcoholic Mocktails  3:29 Fluff and Fold Struggles 5:25 Ruining A Crisp White Shirt 8:30 Virtual Smells 9:30 Connor’s Late Arrival 11:20 The Farmer’s Dog 13:19 Driving to the Airport 15:49 X-rays are IN 17:48 Disposable Clothes 19:51 Seaside Florida 22:18 Acorns 23:12 Displaced in the Airport 28:19 Dry Ass Skin 30:19 Fleeing from Diarrhea 34:04 The McDonald’s App 35:48 Spider Propaganda 39:51 Empathy for Spiders 43:17 Feeling Old 45:45 Squarespace 46:54 Saving Lives with Magnets 50:15 Entitled Truck Driver 52:14 Max’s Late Night Surprise 55:39 Food off the Car Floor 58:17 Drunk Storytelling 59:29 Justice for Gypsy’s Ex 1:03:06 Show Recs 1:07:00 Nice Try Diddy 1:10:03 Andrew Garfield's Filmography  1:14:26 See You In Bonus!!! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This episode is brought to you by Prime. Obsession is in session. And this summer, Prime originals have everything you want. Steamy romances, irresistible love stories, and the book to screen favorites you've already read twice. Off campus, L, every year after, the love hypothesis, Sterling Point, and more. Slow burns, second chances, chemistry you can feel through the screen.

Your next obsession is waiting. Watch only on Prime. that lady was so rude that drops out of the breeders like I feel like she's a part of the breeders are you drunk a little bit really did you drink last night oh my god yeah you have your drunk voice yeah but I mean like that's insane at this point like I went to the podcast be a little bit drunk oh my god oh my god I love that I was able to clock that. It's how possible.

You have a very specific, like, I guess it's a slur, but it's more of like your words blend together in a specific way. You know what's so funny is I think when I'm completely, completely sob, magob, like I'm talking about the night before, I'm so serious and I'm so healthy the morning of, the morning after, that I'm like coffee, apple, maybe, if I'm feeling crazy. But just zen and that's the voice you don't like is the calm, cool, as a cucumber, put together. This could be better for us today.

And this could be so fun for us. What did you do last night? I went to the David Yermann event. Oh, right, right, right. How was it? It was awesome. It's awesome to hear that. It was so much fun.

What did you get into? I had several drinks. Right. What kind of mottails did you have? I had a couple of the spicy margaritas, which is funny because, like, for me. When you say a couple? Well, no, to start. No, I know, but I'm just wondering.

I ordered a couple to share, a couple shared plates of the marguerite. Solo spicy margarita called three of them. Called three of them. I'll take five more than blonde bitches. Okay. And actually, I'll take 14 more. Do we know what to them? Mm-mm.

Given to me. So you did have three and then 14? I think I had seven. Okay. So like... On top of the appetizer or... No, I didn't have 10 spicy margages. I would be the man in the iron lung right now if I had seven.

Okay. If I had 11, whatever the... three plus seven is. I wouldn't be here. Today? Yeah, I don't think I would be here if I had seven special marries. And after the three I had

think about three more and then then just beers. I'm so sorry, you had three and three more but also seven and ten. Stop the count. I'm just confused like where one's starting

and one's ending and it was hard for me to tell as well and even right now recanting. Okay. So it was almost impossible to tell. How many drinks did you have? About three. and seven and then and then probably 13 after they 10 probably 13 add it all together that's 26 I mean who's counting oh my gosh but these burritos just got delivered what kind did you get I got a hot one I guess really hot you ordered you ordered the hot assata oh so walk me through what happened when you woke up this morning so I woke up on my on my on my

Because I got my fluff and fold laundry back. Right. And, well, I had this whole quarrel yesterday, this tiff. Because I got all my whites back and I separated my whites from my... Don't they do that for you? I don't know what they do there. I'll tell you what they don't do. Clean.

What happened? All of my whites came back and they had a very specific stain. Was it green? Because that's what's been happening to my whites. I do my own laundry now because I'm a big girl. Wow. Yeah. But when I did the fluff and fold, they would come back green.

But I got reimbursed for all of my green clothes. Okay, I'm taking mine back in. Unfortunately, like, the problem comes down to me needing a bib. Because it's the same spill right here on my chastel region. How is that their fault? Well, they could have gotten the same out. It smells great. Depending on what you got on your chastel region, they might not be able to.

But there's one saying, and I would agree with you, there's, me opening my burritos if we're having lunch. There's one stain. Are you sure you want your burrito and your cuder like that? It feels so good. Just for optics? Yeah, you're right. Oh my gosh.

Feels good? The end of a burrito when it is so tucked away. Oh, my God. You know, there's so much tortilla in there that you can, it's going to be like a full tortilla bite. Yeah. Did you drive here? If I die before I wake, I pray the Lord my soul to take.

What was the question? Oh, what happened when you woke up this morning? Oh, woke up on my couch because of the fluff and fold. Basically all the sands that are on my chest are from my own doing. And it's hard to blame that on them. I think I need to do my whites in my own home. Because in this home? They're probably not.

Maybe they're not bleaching. Maybe you have to specify the bleach function. Oh, yeah. I mean, get the coffee scene out of the middle of the white t-shirt. Like, I feel like... I think, like, that might be a lost cause. You should start getting, like, cheap, cheap white t-shirts. Well, there...

Oh, gosh, I'm squeaking around on the ground. There's one specific shirt that I remember the day that I got it. I was in D.C. And I had the whole day to kill. And it was a gorgeous day in Washington, D.C., as I've said before. And I went to get to go to the bookshop. Yeah And I go to get this book

And I said Luna Luna and it's like an art book Yeah Look at you I know what everyone's thinking And you're right I love art So what

Sue him Sue me Many great people have loved art Jesus So what happened when you woke up this morning Well when I was in D.C. And I had gone to Maine well and I got this white t-shirt.

I had gone to a coffee shop just before. Sure. And I was holding, I needed to be on my phone. That's what people don't tell you about holding something in your other hand. Is that like, I need a hand for my phone. I almost need a third hand. Right.

Or one of those neck things that holds my phone so I can scroll. But I had gotten this Madewell white t-shirt to wear that night at my show. And I was holding my coffee, my iced coffee in this hand, and then the Made Well-Badale back. kind of like with my hook finger, my pinky.

And I'm holding it. A little unbeknownst to me. One drop had made it down through the made-will bag and onto not only my Luna book that was wrapped in plastic. Think fuck. Think fuck. But it had rolled off the plastic a lot like a duck has that protective layering. Yeah, the polarizing layer. Yeah, it's polarized lens.

But it had rolled off this polarized lens onto my white T. Yeah. So I had a cold brew stain of my white t-shirt. And it was an unworn shirt. Like there's no, I feel like once you wear a shirt a couple times, like it's more prone to stains. It absorbs the stain. And it's like, this is a part of me now as a shirt. Uh-huh.

This is a part of my genetic makeup. This shirt was brand new. This is no Ginny from the block shirt. This shirt has jailed its way back to the block. and is like brand new on the block and like shouldn't be able to absorb any stain Maybe you could tie dye it Maybe you could tie dye it

I'm just pissed like is kind of You're just pissed off Let me take one bite of this That's fine Okay It looks pretty good You want any? No, I'm good

Thank you though Oh my gosh if I could Are you trying to get people to taste it through the mic? Or like smell it Oh my god It is crazy how we haven't developed like sending smells through devices yet. That seems like a layup.

Like faxing smells. I think we've talked about faxing smells before. Could you imagine being in an Uber and you text and people like, you've no idea what I'm going through right now? Because they literally don't have any idea. There's no words. That's the problem with smells. There are no words.

What could I compare? Right. You can't. And that's the problem with pain. I can't eat this on the pod. Everyone will thank me later. Yeah, let's take a pause in the brief. So do you want to let us know what happened this morning that led to your late arrival or should we just move on?

I was basically on the couch and it was 827. Yeah. And I had set my alarm for both six as well as 625-ish. And let's not forget about 645. Right, I wouldn't. Now my normal one is set for 7.45. You were just wanting to get ahead of it, though. Once my alarm starts going off, I'm not actually asleep, I'm just laying there like, uh-huh.

Like, really just. Yeah. How you say. How you say. Awake. Yes. And not moving. 150%.

But I'm staring at the ceiling and I'm like right there. But this one was like the kiss of life. It was like wake up. The final alarm? The 8.27 a.m. alarm? Like, I didn't. What happened to all the 7 a.m.? I think that they must have gone off, and I'm so accustomed to being like, nope.

Even though I do get up like at 745 to 8.15 every day. This is a special circumstance. Mm-hmm. And let the record show that that's when you would normally leave your house or should probably be leaving your house. 827, yes. I need to be leaving 30 minutes before this podcast specifically. but today I left at 856 and then which is kind of good for what you've been through with the t-shirts and all I also ordered three burritos.

Why three? Because I was thinking like if we all split them then it would be six and I'm sure there's six people in this. That's really nice of you. Well I also wanted to taste them all. That's the crux of the issue, huh? Well. It's the crux of it.

Sure. Yeah. In many ways. How are you? Good. It's nice to see you. It's so nice to see you. Yeah.

I'm pretty good. I also was late today because it takes me, I have time. I have to leave my house 11 minutes before I would usually leave my house to get out of my driveway. Now, that's something that you're going to forget about when you have something that is very times instead. I know. Such as in addition to a flight. Well, the good news about the flight pieces that I'll be getting into an. Uber that doesn't have to come down the driveway.

The special part about getting into an Uber that doesn't have to come down the driveway is that it costs almost nothing to park at the airport I figured out. I know. I've learned that too, but there's something about driving to the airport that's really like goes against the laws of physics. Like you shouldn't be taking yourself to the airport. You need to wind down before you pull up to the feeder road that pulls you into the airport. It's kind of like, because once you leave your house, that's a part of the journey to your

final destination. And it feels like you shouldn't be the pilot. of your own ship there. You should really be like the girl that's going to be okay on the way to the airport like this. But in reality, there's no reason. There's no reason that I can't pilot my own ship because I'm a girl. Right. And girls can do it.

Yeah. There's many girls that have. I told you about when I almost missed my flight home from Thanksgiving. And because no Ubers were coming to get me because it was going to be an hour and a half to get to the airport. So then last minute I was like, I have to drive. Like, that's the only way I'm going to maybe even a little bit make my flight. I was in traffic for two hours.

Literally the only thing I could do, like I couldn't park in an offsite lot or I was going to miss my flight, like taking the shuttle. So I parked like in the airport. And I was like, I'll just eat the cost. Like, I'm sure it'll be like a few hundred, like $200 because I was going to be away for like four nights. I think that it would have been, by the way, like 50. To park in the airport? Yeah, and which is the cost of my. It was 800 when I got back.

So. Well, like, it's a holiday weekend. Do the upsurge parking garages? I think that's what it costs to park in LAX, by the way, so don't do that, if at all possible. I'm still paying that off. That was one of my collections items. Oh, my God. I have to pay my bills today.

Please don't let me forget. I won't. Another week goes by of me saying that my bills are at collections. And collections is my money. probably listening to the podcast being like, our bellies are full. Collections definitely listens to the pod. Collections is gluttonous.

I got an x-ray. That doesn't cost redacted. Or it shouldn't. What? I think x-rays are really expensive. I think x-rays are really expensive. For what reason? I take pictures all day.

Not of the inside of your body like that. You don't have the technology. They charge you a lot for something that you can't do on your own. Oh my gosh. The elites are at it again. Yeah. That's the 1%. Yeah, the 1% is added again,

taking pictures of the inside of my body without my consent. You have signed up for the X-ray. So, I, I, retroactively on consent. Okay, you should let collections now. I think that that could, I think that I could carry some weight there.

I'd like to see you give it a try. Get, delete those pictures of my gut. Luckily those pictures do make me look really good because it's just my skeleton Yes, yes, it is like I love seeing my skeleton My x-rays Although my teeth still look the same as they do Like like horsey They still look like that in the x-ray which I don't love

Oh shut up Oh, I'm fine Squirt Your teeth look great No, I'm fine with it Instead of nudes we should start sending pictures of our x-rays because we look snatched Well you know it would be like I would be totally fine with a nude of mine being blasted out, I would not be fine with the pictures that I've sent to curology.

Being blasted out. Right. That's for you to know and them to find out. I almost would prefer they never find that out either. Like, I can just describe what's happening on my face and words. It is a war zone. I'd rather just let me type it out. Yeah.

Lordy, lordy, Jordy. What'd you do for the fourth? I, by the way, happy, I'm so excited when these things are over. No offense to America. What things? Like holidays? Like the big holidays where it's like,

everyone's doing something, everyone has plans and it was kind of like, I could do this, and everyone was like, how's I, I know, and I was on the beach, like here. I didn't do squat. I went and hung out with some friends on the beach,

and then I went to a bar, which is exactly what I do last night, ever, all the time. Yes. And it was a blast. And it was so nice not going to the airport and not having a bag to unpack today

and or ever. You know, like I still have my bagpacks from when I went to San Francisco for that golf trip. Yeah. Which was four weeks ago. I totally understand. I don't believe in unpacking suitcases if you're just going to use one again eventually.

I think that maybe they should make disposable clothes and I'm not talking about Sheehan. Okay. I'm talking about... Like a apron that you were at the dentist? Yeah. Like a, like, make it, or like an, like an, like an open-ask hospital gown for me to wear on my boys' trip. Wait, so you don't have to do the laundry?

So that it dissolves, like, in the ground and I can just take it off. I think dissolvable clothes would be different than disposable. Like, you could have nice dissolvable. Oh, I'm sorry. Disposable clothes. No, dissolvable. Dissolvable is what I meant. And everyone knows what I was saying. That could be nice.

A little bit of dissolvable, like, unless you're spraying it and not saying it, like, well, you're out and about. They should be, because then you would be in the nude, and then you would be off to the brig. Yeah.

But I think that maybe a certain solution to dissolve your clothes would be nice. Oh yeah, it comes with the special solution that is not water, so people spraying it

wouldn't even be able to dissolve your clothes. It doesn't come naturally, right? Yeah, it doesn't come naturally. So tell me about your fourth because mine is really nothing to tell anyone about. I went to seaside Florida have you been there?

I am like beside myself that that place exists. I had no idea. You southerners are gatekeeping it. Hey. I had never heard of it until I moved here and have so many friends from the south that go. Like you're leaving us to the Jersey Shore when you have you have those crystal clear waters in white sand. Florida is much more akin to you in Philly. I know.

I don't understand. Well, no, my Florida is different for the worst. My Florida is the complete opposite of your Florida. She said Florida is... It's like magnificent, picturesque, gorgeous piece of land. She said Florida is what they wrote Purgatory about. No, it's literally, you know it's the town in the Truman Show. I had no idea.

Yes, it's that perfect that the Truman Show used it for their fake town. It is literally like the houses are pristine, The landscaping is pristine. Like you cough and someone comes and cleans up your cough out of the air. I don't understand how there were shark attacks there because you. Sharks shouldn't be loud there. No, not that. You can see in the water so clearly.

You could have seen that. No, not blaming. I'm not victim blaming. But you could have seen that shark coming from a mile away. I hope you're okay, though. I get it. It happens. There was many shark attacks over the weekend as well.

Over the weekend? Mm-hmm. But anyway. I was, I felt, I told you I wasn't going to go in the water. Once I got there, I felt completely comfortable because I knew I could have, assuming I had been wearing my glasses, which I wasn't, I knew I could have been, I could have seen that shark coming from a mile away. And that's a shark over there, I think.

No, I'm not in the water right now. Hello, sharks. Today I'm asking for my leg. In exchange for please don't bite it.com. You should add that to your, uh, that little stand-up routine you do. That little stand-up thingy. Yeah. The stand-up thingy.

And then I have that show. I have two shows on Friday. Are you excited? If I don't KMS today, which is like not totally and realistic. I am not going to be excited, sure. Okay. That's nice to know. It is so nice to know.

Oh my God, you won't believe what happened on the plane, though, of course. So I saw on our notes. plane. Yeah. Listen to what happened on the plane. Yeah, I'm listening. Everything was so smooth.

Well, you know, I took that red eye that actually wasn't ideal, but like it is what it is with a layover. It is what it is. So those two legs were fine, excluding the part that they were in the red eye of the eye. Okay. Then first leg on the way back is fine. Second leg on the way back from Dallas to L.A. A family was on our flight that the mom.

kept saying they were displaced from their original flight. She kept screaming that they were displaced and because they were displaced, they all have middle seats and she really, just because they were displaced, would like to get them all together. So it came to light later that by displaced, she meant they missed their connecting flight. Displaced is like words are so powerful. Exactly. And she chose displaced for the word for missing your connection.

We have been displaced. and now we're headed to seaside from Dallas. You should have seen my face when she was screaming that she'd been displaced for me to find out later that she had missed her connecting flight. Displaced is reserved for people like escaping war zones. That were displaced.

But she's escaping Highland Park, I assume. They were so scary. So it was a mom, a dad, and three daughters. Okay. I am in Roe 9. I'm in Ro 9 in the window seat. Patrick is in row 9 in the window seat on the other. of row nine.

Okay? Next to me in the middle seat is the dad. Next to him in the middle seat is the mom. In front of me in the middle is one of the daughters. And then in front of him is two of the daughters. So they're doing passbacks. No, she's saying that her three daughters have to sit together due to the displacement. So she moved.

How many seats are in the row? Let me get a grab. Let me get a grab. There's three and three. Three and three. So she's saying that her one daughter in front of me that was in the middle seat has to go sit in the aisle seat. with her other daughters because her other daughter's

in the other side in the middle of the window she's wanting her middle seat daughter to move to the aisle so she takes upon herself to move that middle seat daughter to the aisle seat of the other side

and she lets the flight attendant know that she's just going to be doing that I need a visual I can't basically she took she decided that it was okay for her daughter to take somebody else's aisle seat

and trade them for a middle seat because she was displaced and she needed her daughters to be together She was literally displaced, though. Okay. So she's letting the flight attendant know. Because I have been displaced, my daughter is going to move from this middle seat to this aisle seat.

So you can just let the person coming on the plane know that they're going to sit in the middle seat now. Okay. Okay. Do you understand that? So I am like on the edge of my seat waiting for the young person to come on to the plane to find out that because of the displacement, he now has to sit in the middle seat. He or she? He or she. Sorry.

I just know that it was a man. So I'm getting ahead of myself. He comes on and then the mom obviously goes into, so I have been displaced. My daughters have been displaced. So she is going to sit here in your seat if you don't mind sitting in the middle seat. He goes, that's totally fine. Oh my God. I would have gotten up and tried to fight beforehand.

And the flight attendant literally walked him on because I think the flight attendant figured like he was going to have to moderate the situation and tell the daughter to go back to her middle seat. Life could be such a dream. if things like that didn't make me mad on behalf of other people. No, Connor, that's completely normal to be. I was beside myself. Oh my God. I had my AirPods in so that no one would ask me to move, but I had no noise coming out of them so that I could hear everything.

Oh my God. If, oh my God, life could be a dream. I would, I bet they must have paid him to not, like they must have. No, it was literally, I don't, he must have been, I, he didn't have any sort. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.

I don't know what was wrong with him or what was right with him. But it was something that I don't have. Wow. And I don't want to have, quite frankly. No, Brooke, life could be a dream. No, I don't want that. I don't want to be okay with switching from an aisle to a middle. That's not something I want to be okay with.

And I don't think anyone should be okay with that. Unless you're that guy who literally didn't care, which I don't understand. Sometimes something so good can happen to you during the day. that like that middle seat is kind of like you know what you think he just got engaged or something or like got laid at the airport i guess yeah same thing but that's such thing i bet he was just on cloud nine quite literally yeah he's calling you i don't know it looks like a spam a scam a scam a scam and then i told you i was sitting next to the dad i got a text too by the way so don't think that you're the only one getting your phone blown up i didn't think that for one second it's from um

Bredo factory. It's here. Yeah. So the dad that was sitting next to me had the driest skin. And you might be wondering how I know his skin was so dry because he was itching nonstop. And you could hear the symphony of him itching his dry skin. I've never heard anything like it. Because as you know, I was listening to my AirPods with no music in them so I could hear every itch.

And he wouldn't stop. and he was itching his butt. Like he was literally like, it could not stop itching. Connor, dead skin flakes falling onto my lap. Dead skin flakes falling onto my lap. And he's just playing on the Uber app. Just seeing how long it would take him

to get from certain places. You're on, you're on your, you're on the plane about to take off. What are you doing on Uber? That's the last app I'm going to be playing on. He was distracting himself from his scabies. He was so itchy and so dry. I'm sure I still have.

have some of, it's not his fault. If he died, I would be accused of being the murderer because I have so much of his DNA on my body from his dead skin flying all my God. That's not where I thought you were going to go with that at all. No, that's the truth of it. It was really scary. Okay, speaking of people that have died. And that family really like should be on the no-fly list.

They really mean that. Oh, the man of that family was the itchy one? Yes, the father. Remember father was next to me, the mother was next to Patrick. She didn't take off her straw hat once Well you can sometimes those hats you have to leave on That's my favorite thing going to like Aspen Is all of the mamas

The mama bears do not take off their like leather hats the entire way How do you lean back? They don't they don't lean back They don't lean forward either That sounds horrible Well it's the price you pay for fashion bitch so Okay bitch I guess I wouldn't know right um i need to talk about this situation okay so i saw the news that someone had to leave

gwyneth paltrow's home one of her she's a number of properties sure she's a number of homes and i saw during a fourth of july an independence day celebration that someone had to leave her house because due to severe diarrhea Was it the property that she was at? Like she was having a party? It was her. She was hosting. Why can't they just have diarrhea at the property?

I'm sure there's 18 bathrooms. Well, I'm sure Gweneath Paltrow's house is anti-dierea, which is fine. Just like, just like, just like Larry David's coffee shop is anti-poop. If you're going to poop, don't do it in my restaurant. I'm not even providing you the facilities. I didn't realize she had the anti-diarrie at all. It can't happen at my coffee shop. Okay.

And that's what Gwyneth Paltrow said. Those were not my words. Those are hers. Are Gwyneth actually kicked them out? I don't know. I'd like this person to do. Turns out it was, it was this like this.

I follow him online because he always posts the most interesting stuff. I'm sure that's a joke. No. I'm sure that's like an absurdist headline. That's a joke. It's right there. No, I see it.

Derek Plasberg. Hollywood socialite accused of fleeing Winnet Paltrow's Hampton's home after, quote, catastrophic. Diarrhea. who counts Jeff Bezos and Demi Moore as pals. Here's the thing. Fleeing implies that it's you chose.

That's your choice. It would be banished. Yeah, but it would be banished if... Connor. That's fling. Okay, but I'm saying that that's not like something that you bring upon yourself. Did that seem like a choice to you? You know what?

100% did. I'm saying that he would be banished if Gwyneth told him to leave. Gwinnett didn't tell him to leave. I know. And that's part of him, he himself. No. Yeah. Some people need to, you have to kind of remove your ass from your, from yourself. Gwyneth Boucher.

Conor, check your privilege. Not everyone has the ability. Wow. Yeah. 42 is not looking that old to me anymore, which is so scary. Is Gwyneth 40, Gwyneth is not 42. She's 51, but this man, Derek Blasberg, um, who, also who always post pictures of like Jeff Bezos, Kate Hudson,

Carly Claus, Kendall Jenner, and Sienna Miller. Yeah. Do you need to flee Gwyneth Paltrow's home? I'm going to start saying, that's added to my vernacular, by the way. I get it. No, I just have my phlegis.

I'm so sorry, I need to actually flee Gwyneth Paltrow's home. No, because of... No, flam pride. What? Flem pride. Yeah, I'll flam at Gwyneth's. You'll flim at Gwyneth. Yeah, I don't mind Fleming at Gwynet's.

You would Flim in front of GP. Yeah, I've also had like horrible catastrophic diarrhea at a celebrity's house and had someone who I wouldn't want to be waiting outside of the door, be waiting outside of the door. Now you've got to tell us names. It's not. I mean, I was at, um, who's a celebrity's home? I was at Lance Bass's house and David Archelette was waiting outside of the door when I had

explosive diarrhea. Well, he, we had Taco Bell. So that was that like weekend where I wouldn't stop following David around. That was one of those So I had to head over to Lances You're completely fine I know Yeah but I had horrible diarrhea

At Lances So Okay so Well at least you were able to Empty back I like don't Like when you You were able to drain your snake

At Lance Bass's which is nice When you grow up with a bad stomach And like you just like You have to just go where you You don't have the privilege of being like I'll wait till I get home Right you have to Like you just have to go in whatever bathroom is available to you.

So I don't have an issue. Like I wouldn't have an issue just like sharding up in that bathroom. You have to bloom where you're planted. Exactly. Yeah. You have to shard up where you have to shard up. Where you have to shard up. Yeah, exactly.

Walk me through the spider propaganda that you wanted to talk about today. I have been affected by big spider In a way that makes me full-blown emotional Brooke Yeah Oh my god I'm gonna get choked up I saw this TikTok of this spider Oh my god Cute little bubbly walking up

Spider like but not like a spider that I've ever known Cute Cute as a button that one Personal personal bull like my best friend, my right-hand man. And the quote on the video of the spider walking up on the table, oh, I'm so sorry.

I didn't know being seen would cost me my life. I'm going to cry. That is like really, really powerful when you put it back. Oh my God. I'm like actually going to. And think like how many times you've done that. You're part of the problem. Oh my God.

I'm going to read some of the, I'm going to read some of the comments on it. Please, please do. That is powerful. Oh my God. I literally there's tears. I know. I do not blame you.

I mean, given the circumstances of today. I don't blame you. And all that has come before me and given the fact that I did fall out of a coconut tree last night. It's no surprise that I'm crying about the spider. I know. I know. I read me the comments.

It's making me... I can see you're emotional. Oh my God, I found it. Let's see. Oh, that's not a cute spider, by the way, at all. That is scary. Let it get closer to you. It's coming to say hello.

It's the music that's making you think it's cute. Read it some of the comments. And I'm sorry for scaring you. And I'm sorry for scaring you, but I didn't know that being seen would cost me my life. I know. I heard you the first time, yeah. Oh, you're killing me. Okay, I'm going to read some of this.

And I'm going to say paragraph after each one so you know that one comment ends in the action source. I appreciate it. Thank you. Did the spider tell you that? Paragraph? That's a cute spider. No, that's not even funny. Not my problem.

Flip-flop emoji. Oh, do you know why they put the flip-flop emoji? I think that's the murder weapon. I know. Oh my God, there's so many flip-flop emojis. This is like, this is almost hate speech. Like for me. That is heinous.

The spiders can live, but not in my house. You have always said that, which is scary to think of where you've come from. Live life, but not in my bedroom paragraph. Okay, but don't come in my room paragraph. Girl, the spiders I see are not like that paragraph. That's exactly what I'm talking about. Like, I don't see spiders like this, but it literally feels like I am a racist talking about spiders.

Like, oh, that's not the spiders that I see. Do you know what I'm talking about? Yeah, I do know what you're talking about. My eyes are opened. My eyes are a gape. Yeah. After learning this new information. Yeah.

I feel like I, I feel like I went on an eat, pray love trip, and I'm coming back with like a full new view because of this TikTok. Yeah. Can we find, like I know that there has been a few moments in this podcast where Connor has spoken negatively about spiders. if we could find those and then kind of juxtapose that with how far you've come

I think that would be a beautiful montage with that music set set to it I just like this broke my heart like I feel like it's in a million pieces oh my God thank you for sharing that of course like this is the only space I would share my newfound like empathy I guess

for arachnids but that is what it is that is what it is and I don't I don't know how else to say it. And I'm embarrassed. I'm, like, I do want to set my, my apartment on fire. Yeah. When I move, when I move out, but like, now knowing this, it's like, how different is the scary,

disgusting one that was in my bed from this little jumping spider? But that's, that's a bad way of thinking. Like, one is scary and disgusting because of the way it looks. That's what I'm saying. Yeah. So. And if you are racist and you're listening to this, just kidding.

Stop listening. One. What's two? One. I wasn't going to go on. Oh, okay. Stop listening. Or just like keep listening and be changed.

Yeah. That's even better. Yeah. You can change. If I can do it, you can do it. Okay. Wow, that was powerful. I mean, hate speech can be transformed into love speech.

All it takes is one TikTok. One TikTok is all it takes. Genuinely. All it takes to shift my entire view on something is one TikTok. I will be fully like, yeah, I'm liking that. Scroll on twice. Wait, this argument is presented way better, fully switching my view. Uh-huh.

Unliking. I'll scroll up and un-like and scroll down and like the new one. I treat my likes on my TikTok as like a bookmark, you know, so I'm like, oh, I'm going to go back and... Well, you know, they have the bookmark feature. Well, I like and bookmark for important stuff. I think people save most things by accident. Like, when I see someone that I know has saved on my TikToks, I'm like, you didn't mean to do that. You can see that?

Yeah. Only if it's somebody that you are mutual. with. But I always think it's an accident if that helps. How many times can an accident happen? A lot. Lightning can strike twice. Yeah, it can. Or seven or eight times even. Quickly. Oh, you know who I hung out last night? Which was amazing.

Who? Chase Stokes. Your buddy. We had never met. You're kidding. In person. How was it? Love for sight. Amazing. Such a special boy. Uh-huh. Man. Uh-huh.

Sorry. It's all good. Um, so normal and so cool. Oh my God, that's great. Do you think you'll get together again? Probably not. Do you think that? I hope so, but he doesn't live here anymore.

Oh, really? He's moved. He's studying abroad. Do you feel good about your performance last night? So good. Okay. I was not, I did not get drunk. Like, I promise you.

Okay. Yeah. Until I left and then went to the second location. And I want to give everyone a piece of advice. Never go to the. the second location. I agree. Go home.

Go home. I've never had fun at a second location. But I was with some friends, Jack In and N. Yeah. Was there? We had such a blast. I mean, Jack I. Love Jack I.

He is so cool. I love his mustache. Yeah. I didn't realize he's a young one. He's young. Yeah. Do you know we're two years older than Daisy Edgar Jones? Yeah.

She's 26. Is that not the worst thing you ever heard? Not that I care because I'm blessed to be aging. It's a privilege. And I've completely reworked my thinking around that. But isn't that crazy? Normal people. Crawdads.

The new film twister with Glenn Powell, 26. And you know we're older than Jacob Allorty too, right? Shut the fuck up for two seconds. Oh my God. Like, that is not language I want to hear. In my home. What doesn't make sense to me is like... I don't want to hear that I'm older than everyone.

Okay, imagine it's me and Jacob Allorty sitting right there instead of you. I'm his elder. Like he should show respect to me as his elder. And he did. Oh, God. Yeah, he's nothing but respectful. But that's wild that I'm his... I'm one of his elders.

You go like this. Jacob! You don't speak to me like that. You respect your elder. You could... I'm just saying like that's crazy. I mean, lots of... the stuff is crazy.

Totally. Magnets. I'm just highlighting one right now. Yeah. Magnets are crazy. Brooke, so long ago, long ago, I'm talking. Like, childhood, childhood, childhood. I came up with the idea of really strong magnets for cars.

And the bottom of the car has a really strong magnet. And the road is a really strong magnet, but opposite polar eye. Or wait, no, same magnet plus or minus, whatever the thing they do is. And would that not take the opposite thing? It would push each other away. And the car would fly? And the car could go forward based on air, like fans. Because it would be off the road.

And then, you know. I'm actually, I'm not following. Okay. So magnets, when you hold them same pole. Yeah. What is the thing called? Same charged. If it's the same, then they repel.

Yes. And it would keep them off the road. So you want the cars to off road? Have you ever seen a magnet? magnet float not in water but like in the air yeah so you

this is that's a hover car right brook but it would eliminate a lot of small critter roadkill squirrels could cross that's why I invented that

wow you aren't environmentalist I love animals yeah it seems that way it does seem that way oh are you okay yeah I was just thinking do you have to flee

Gwynethhauter's home no I was just thinking about a piece of roadkill I saw oh don't tell me Because I don't want to know. I won't. But it wasn't even like, it was like pink.

You know, like, didn't. Exactly what I didn't want to know. Like, that's why I asked you not to share. That much of a baby that it hadn't even like. Brooke, stop sharing more info about it. I don't want to know that specific thing. I have a disease called every now and then I imagine something that I've never seen happening. I'm like, I'm sure at some point it happened and I feel bad for that animal.

You guys want to hear something like actually graphic and horrible and I'm not joking right now? No, not if you just screamed at me like that. They found a German Shepherd with its mouth zip tide. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. They dumped in Malibu, and luckily someone found it. But who's a fucking... He's alive?

Completely fine. Who the fuck does that? Like, I need to... I'm serious. Street justice. Yeah. Like, and I'm not strong. Look at my upper body. I would beat the fucking shit out of the person that did that.

You would get that kind of like adrenaline rush that mothers get to lift the car off of their children. Oh my God, I'm getting it right now. Like I feel that my face is itchy. Yeah. Like thinking about beating them up and really put it, really zip tying their mouth shut.

I get it. Their lips. I get it. That person deserves a highlight. But we'll move on because I need to tell you a funny story. Okay, tell me. I hope that person literally gets in a really bad accident, by the way. And I mean that.

I say that with my chest. I see that, yeah. car or otherwise. Magnet car. Magnet car, but it sucks you to the ground and crushes you in between the car and that road. So the charge would... You would probably have to be really careful if that invention came to life about what you wear on your body. Because you could be sucked into the floor or the car.

Vice versa. So I'm going to tell two separate stories that really sound like they go together, but they don't. Okay, perfect. And it both has to do. Say paragraph when one's over. Okay. So I'm walking up to my house literally yesterday. And this woman is pulling out of her driveway with her massive F-150.

And I was waiting for her to pull out, pull-out, pull-out. And I'm sitting there with Max, like, doing the white person, like, smile, like, lips, purrs, like, head nod. And she's sitting there, and then she does, like, emotion to me. oops and she's like and I'm like I thought she was

asked me to cross but I was like you're almost pulled out like just go and she rolls her window down and it's like I'm like excuse me

she goes are you picking up your animals your animal's business and I said excuse me are you picking up your animal's business I go if he pooped I would pick it up

and she goes I'm just making sure oh oh oh this is one of those things where I actually stood my ground. I said, if he pooped up, pick it up. And obviously he wasn't pooping. We were waiting for you to pull your massive like your 18 wheeler out of your driveway.

But I cannot wait to see her again. Talk about taking care of the environment. She's polluting it. You should have told her that. You should have told her that. I went to cover my eyes. My pinky finger went into my nostril. Oh my God

Next time you see her ask her How many gallons of How many carbon emissions She's shooting out into the ocean And the world I'm gonna say Are you taking care of your animal's business I don't know if she has a dog or anything

I'm just gonna ask Every time I see her now Because how dare you Secondly I have to share this Piece of News Paragraph So Max

Has slept through the night Since I got him Forever But this weekend on Let me think Saturday That's so sweet to talk about him, like sleeping through the night like a baby. Well, I wasn't sure his schedule, you know, or his cycle.

And I, so, like, I always, like, right when I got him, I was like, it's been four hours. Like, do I need to take him out? Right. And then, like, I slept through one night right when I first got him. I'm sorry. And then I was like, oh, he can do it. So then I haven't really. But he doesn't tell me when he needs to go out.

So it's, like, hard for me to be like, oh, no, I can't sleep. because he might be uncomfortable, you know? Like, you don't want your dog to be, like, suffering in silence because I have a voice for those who can't speak. And so the other night, I, like, wake up. This fucking creep is sitting straight up staring at me. Like, in my room like this. And his ears don't perk up unless he hears something

or he's, like, paying really close attention. Uh-huh. Ears up, like, staring at me in my bed. Which, like, literally in my head, I was like, that's like a vampire like in my head I was like what the fuck is that and it's max and he's sitting straight up and I was like go lay down lay down lay down and I rolled over and then I was like why did you look over it stoic just staring at me oh he hasn't moved and I took him out and I'm walking good Lord sorry my phone is going off at the watch put it on DND and call it

done um And so I take him out and I walk him. This is at 3.40 a.m. I walk him, walk him. And he doesn't go pee or anything. But he's frantically looking around. And then I'm like, someone's trying to break into my house. Like he heard something.

Or there's someone already in my house. And now I'm outside. So I'm like, now I don't want to go back inside. Because Max isn't going to do squat. Right. Never has. Never will. And so then I'm outside and I'm walking around.

And finally I'm like, We're going to bed. Like, it's 3.40 a.m. I look like a creep. I've got a hood on. And I'm in my boxers, because I'm like, no one can tell if these are shorts or boxers.

Right. Underwear. And I'm outside. And then on the way home, the house next to me, again, unrelated to the story I just told about the woman in the truck, goes up to their front door and projectiles out of his ass. Poop.

on their door soft serve like onto their doorstep in front of their ring camera and the ring camera lights up and the light turns on and it's like you are being recorded which I didn't even know that they had that

I guess because of like package thieves and I had to walk up at 3.40 a.m. with a bag and I'm crouched down with my hood on and it was a massive duke and I was like scooping and then I had to go home and get another bag but I was like Whoa, it's 3.40 a.m. and I'm up right next to these people's door, right next to their ring camera being recorded with the hood on, ducking down below it.

That's the end of the story. That's the end of the day. Thank you for sharing. I'm not done. Oh. That night, I was also having to flee with Paltrow's home. You were having diarrhea too? I didn't say that, but I had gone. So I'm trying to get better at ordering food to my house. You mean you want to do it more or less? More, I'm addicted. No, I want to get off of that drug of like saving $16 by driving a mile.

Like, I can do it. I can't, so. I'm strong. I know, but I don't even have to go downstairs or anything. I can just go out to my car and go. So I go get Mexican food and I get these fajitas. And I order them online. I go pick them up.

And they give them to me in like a 10. And it is hot. A what? A 10. A ten? Like a metal tin. A tin? Sure.

You said ten. Tomato tomato. Ten. Did I do it? No, it's tin. Ten. Tin. What did I say?

Do e for me. Eh? I. Ten. Ten. Ten. Ten. No?

You're saying ten. Ten. No, that's ten. You say ten or ten right there? Ten. Oh my God. We're done. So I gave it to me in this metal container

And it's hot to the touch And so I put it on the dashboard of my car And I get on my phone Outside the place because I was like I can't drive away Yeah, because I need to get on my phone And I'm outside And then I forget my metal tent is on my dashboard And so I just pull out and I make a Ui

And it flies it's the side of my car And it spills everywhere And this is at 10 p.m. I'm going to show you the picture of it hitting my door. I'd like to see it. And splooping everywhere. Here, I'll show it to you. Okay. You, those past three stories, like, felt they were really good and so detailed. Oh, that's sad. That's a sad sight. Does everyone want to see? Yeah. So this is like after I'm like, you know what, you can get up and you can go pick it up and then you're hungry already and it's ready and then you have it in your car

I scooped up everything that was not touching the ground and I put it back in the bowl and I ate it and that gave me weirdly random a stomachache um and that's the end of kind of my part of the story I feel like drunk slash hungover you whatever you identify as right now could teach like a descriptive a descriptive storytelling course did I go way too long no it was just like every you captured every detail. Not in a bad way. I'm just saying that was like so detailed. My dad always and my mom always just start conversations in the middle of me telling a story.

Like since I was born and they're like, well, you just kept going. And I was like, well, I didn't even get to like the meat of the story yet. And they were like, well, you start with that. And like everyone kind of interrupts me when I'm talking, not you. This is not a slight at all. But like it's been something they're like, oh, my. my god i forgot you were still talking type thing yeah that it was descriptive and maybe i should just like start telling deeds like earlier maybe or just like no i think it just i just think it's your

your way of storytelling and people appreciate it today it was just extra layered and detailed which i'm sure we all appreciate so thank you again for sharing do you have any stories i don't I don't have any. I told my story about the plane, but I do want to address some pop culture stuff. Why don't you? Oh my gosh. We have a shared note. Me and Brooke and I can see where she is now in the note. You've always been able to do that. No, I can see your little. Well, we've never been on at the same time like this. Okay. Gypsy Rose is pregnant. I know that. I don't give, really. You don't give? I'm confused. Like, why aren't more people, like, freaking out about her documentary? Like, I figure that that would be something that, like, everyone is watching kind of like almost like a tiger king like we're all watching it i didn't even know she had on but no one seems excited about it and because of that i'm not even watching but like

that because i feel like if people were excited about that i would be watching no i keep stumbling onto ryan is it ryan anderson her ex i don't know i guess it doesn't matter but i keep stumbling onto his lives oh he looks completely different he looks the same oh and then different way. But they're crazy. And I'm kind of like, I know everybody is like following the gypsy of it all. But like I feel like we're not talking about it enough. Because they made a show about her already and that's why she's famous.

Yeah, I guess I'm just confused. Like, why isn't it like, why aren't we all watching? I'm not watching because we're not all watching. It's kind of a like all or nothing thing for me. Oh my gosh. Yeah. But. I just like feel like I know enough about gypsy resume.

be and I'm okay now I'm really interested in actually in Ryan's side of the story make Ryan famous he is on live 24 7 panhandling his dick vibes he's not panhandling his dick is that what you just said no not literally panhandling panhandling his dick off his panhandling his dick off yeah no not really per se and I mean that's just talking about you're just talking about How he was, he was, he was disrespected. That he can't trust enough. He was disrespected.

By his, his fiance cheating on him? Yeah, he was disrespected. That is disrespectful. Now I do, you're right. And now I want to hear his side of the story. Listen, I sent you one. Oh.

Listen, he has some compelling words. Are my shoes made out of plastic? Listen to this. That's what happens when I walk. Okay, this, this TikTok is titled, Respectful. Hey, guys, you're sitting around. And got a couple random thoughts.

I did my first live today, and it was cool. I enjoyed that. I had no idea who's country. He enjoyed it. That being said, guys, it's being, I'm being, it's being, it's very difficult for me to stay respectful. This should be a TikTok sound. I'm getting to the point where I'm about to not be respectful. He's getting to that point.

Let's do a TikTok with this after. It's a good sound. Yes, I did text Gypsy Diderner Live with Ken tonight. I saw this actually Now that I hear you She called me last Saturday Talking about she missed me And of course I miss you

And she said a lot of other things too Why aren't we all kind of following this? I'm finding it to be riveting Because I think once Once people like get their fill They're like on to the next one We needed a new gypsy Well we

You know we don't need another We don't need the whole work of role What led to this moment Such as Such as inconsider The murder of But I'm just to I'm interested in Ryan's

Ryan's journey and I should probably watch the show. I just don't get why I'm not all watching it. Can I tell you some shows to watch if anyone out there is looking for a show to watch? Sure. One, presumed innocent. Holy quack. There's a new episode out tonight.

What is that? It's with Jake Gyllenhaal. Oh, my heavens. It is... I'm addicted to the show. What's it about? Okay. It's almost impossible to say.

Okay. Very good. It's about this horrific murder that upends Chicago, the Chicago prosecuting attorney's office when one of its own is suspected of the crime, leaving the accused to fight to keep the family together. And that's literally word for word what it's about. So I started watching this. Binge, it's on Apple TV. Binged Magoo. completely wash as much as I could.

And then I was like, I need more like court shows, court case shows. Because I started, I turned back on like all these dumb comedy shows that I watch all the time, always sunny and stuff, which is, you know, that is what it is. And I was like, no, I'm hungry for justice. You could read a lot of court case books. No, I need to watch

because I need to be on my phone while I'm watching. Looking at the weather app and the calculator. But I started, I found a new show because this show comes out in pieces because this producer is evil. And this new show is called

Your Honor. And it's the man from Breaking Bad, Papa. Walt? Yep. Brian Cranston. I want to have people watch this as well, but the first episode is so brutally graphic, be warned. Okay.

It's horrific, the first episode. Okay. But it's heavy duty. If you can handle heavy duty, these are shows that you need to watch and then you need, like, a chaser. Shot chaser. I don't particularly like court dramas. So I don't think I'm going to watch them. But I have been watching Perfect Match, which is a little bit different.

I haven't seen anything on Perfect Match either. It's season two. It's like that Netflix show where they bring all of the, like they pick people from all of the different types of Netflix shows. Harry Jousey's on this season. And you know he's always kind of bringing, bringing something to it. So can I say something? Two things. First thing is, you know, that Kindle ad that I posted.

Yes. I thought it was fun and funny. You know, we were both in it. I feel like it was great. I feel like it was great. Okay? I feel like it was great. What are you going to say?

I'm not kidding. They boosted it, which as you guys know means it's reached. It's reached to the masses. Can I just already, can I? Can I get ahead of whatever you're going to say? Are you the annoying girl being annoying? No, it's not even that. My bad.

I don't know where I got that from. I have, I would say over. Yeah, where did you get that from? Because that's what people always say about anything that we're in together. Anowing, annoying, annoying girl. I have. With the body that finally made me feel good about myself. By the way, people are annoying me on that being like, she was just giving you a compliment.

Media literacy, please. A lot of people don't have that. A lot of people don't have media literacy. A thousand comments that say nice try ditty. Now, do you have any idea what that means? I'm not kidding. They were coming through all episode on my iPad. And they have been for a week.

Like my phone is blowing up with nice try ditty, but I haven't blocked ditty from like my words because I want the engagement, I guess. Let me try to think. Yeah. Think about what it could mean. I couldn't get it until I Googled it. Well, pedophilia.

Right, not that. Not pedophilia? It's not pedophilia related. Grooming? No, it's not grooming related. Producing? Kind of. Music?

Apparently it means like he's like involved in everything. So this is like he took a part of this. Like he is pushing this out because it's bad. Like they're saying like the ad is bad because Diddy is involved like pushing. I still don't really get it. I think it means like industry plant. Yeah, industry plant like this sucks. but like Diddy has a piece of it.

I don't really get it. I sure Diddy is a brand new meme or brain rot as the kids are calling these days. But I don't really get it. That involves Diddy. Well, according to know your meme, many speculate that it's a joke about Diddy trying to be involved in seemingly everything perhaps due to his status as an entrepreneur or to pay off the numerous lawsuits surrounding him. But why does that mean brain rot automatically?

Because people are just commenting it on everything. Like they start saying it, oh, I put my foot on my plate. Anyway, that's kind of what I've been dealing with. I'm literally not exaggerating. Thousands of comments. Nice try, Diddy. At this point in my life, I aim to be completely offline by my 30th birthday. You'll have to be dead.

No, I'm going to, I'm going offline. I just saw a tweet yesterday that was like, we're nearing a renaissance. Sorry, I'm flaming at going to the bowels. You're Fleming? Yeah. I have allergies. We're nearing a renaissance of like underconsumption and and offlineism and sobriety and abstinence. What makes you say this?

I just saw a tweet that said it. Oh. And in that I say it depends like on the day. Just I put a bunch of words out there Because I didn't know where to go from Nice ride, Diddy? No, I just like don't really get it. I think it's stupid.

And I'm not just saying that because people are bullying me. Okay, I told me. Like independently of people bullying me, I think that's like, it doesn't make sense to me. How like, Diddy being involved in everything correlates to brain rot. Like, it's just like, I don't know. I think it's a reach and I think you guys can come up with something better. That's all I'll say.

Also, the trailer for Andrew Garfield's new movie and Florence. Pugh's new movie came out today. We live in time. And I didn't watch it because I saved it for you. That's really special. Yeah. So we can do that in the bonus. I hear it's like really brutal.

In what way? Like I'll be carted out of here and stretcher vibes. Oh. Yeah. Very interesting. Yeah. Let's just say, Connor. Do you mind if I just say that I hate when Instagram doesn't work on my iPad.

Why has an iPad my iPad made like or iPads in general? Why haven't iPads updated or why haven't the apps updated to be user friendly on iPads? Seems like an easy thing to me. It does seem so easy. That's a UUX designer issue, not us. Give me one second for me to tell you what I need to tell you. Oh my God. Okay.

The slogan of the movie, we live in time, is every minute counts. Okay, all right, four minutes to save the world. So, no, someone's going to die. Someone's going to die. Someone's going to die. We only got four minutes. Frick, freaking, freaking four minutes, hey? Someone's going to die.

And I know it's going to be Florence, because we always have to see, like, Andrew completely ruined and heartbroken, and he just never gets a happy ending. Well, let's hope he dies, then. It would be less sad if he died to me. Like, we just have to see him be tortured. I don't know.

Florence Piers is such a good crier. She's, I'm telling you, it's going to be her that dies, and we're going to have to watch him suffer. I'm tired of watching him suffer To me, I don't know his personality at all Like I haven't watched any movies with him in it I don't think ever So yes you have

No I think I don't realize how much he's been in Have you not seen the social social network? Did she see the social network? No, I haven't. You haven't seen the social network? You're lying Why would I lie about not seeing the social network? I have no skin in the game Have you not seen the social network? I haven't seen the Winklewaws twins in action

You clearly have if you know their names No one wouldn't know their names if they didn't watch the movie Well, I'm a man in tech. Barely. Oh my God. Not squirt telling me barely in tech. My screen time is 18 hours a day. You've seen his Spider-Man's too.

I have not seen Spider-Man. Yeah, you have. No, I don't watch Spider-Man. Connor, you're way off base. You are being insane right now. You're being off-base. You are being, like, out of pocket. At least I'm not off-base.

I'm safe. And I'm going to the next base. I'm going to second. Let's move on. And I might make it all the way home. Let's move on. But not the Spider-Man movie all the way home. Andrew's in that.

I wouldn't know. But he played a really good trick on everyone saying that he wasn't in it. But guess what? He was. He was. He was in the house going on the whole time. No, they got pictures of him on set. And he said they were photoshopped.

And everyone believed him. Imagine it was a surprise appearance. I'm not in that. when I was in Real Bros. of Simi Valley for about 0.4 of a second and I told everyone. No, because it was supposed to be like a surprise of all the Spider-Man's reuniting

in Tom Holland's Spider-Man universe. Toby McGuire was in it too. Oh, yes, it was like a big thing. And like you were supposed to be in the theater and like scream. And Toby and Andrew went to one of the showings and hats. How precious. Love when celebrities wear hats.

I love the Spider-Boys. That's actually my Willie. Actually, I don't need. I feel like I don't actually need to be with Toby McGuire right now. But. I see Tommy McGuire all the damn time. He's around. It sucks because I see so many celebrities that I do not give about constantly.

Jeremy fragrance seem like twice a week. I'm like, why are you in my view right now? I never see any one. I see everyone. Toby McGuire. I've seen Toby McGuire on an accident. I promise you 10 times. No, I know. Tristan was just having a conversation with him.

I'll be like right next him in the most mundane situation and I'm like, sigh. No, like literally like at this point we would be friends. If it was any, I'd be like, I see you literally all the time. Like God works in such mysterious ways. TM. Like maybe we should be. Rose. Let's go to the bonus because I need to watch that trailer. Okay.

And I have a very special song that I need to listen to also. I think you'll like it. You know it for sure. Thank you guys so much. And we'll see you in the bonus. Thanks for listening. There's a tea in listening that many forget about. So I wanted to bring that to the forefront of the conversation today on our way out.

And I'm going to eat my burrito. Good. I'm glad you'll get that chance. Bye you guys. Bye. This week on close friends. It's not. I'm fucking you.

That's me. You, you, you, you. What? More men wear bracelets now than eat stew. Wake up, orgasm. Breakfast, orgasm. Lunch, orgasm. Dinner, orgasm.

Male yearning is my favorite genre. My whole Twitter timeline is gay porn. Sign up on TMG Studios.com. To watch a full bonus episode.