Brooke and Connor Make A Podcast - Men Can Have Bangs

Episode Date: April 16, 2026

Pre-order Phoebe Berman’s Gonna Lose It: https://sites.prh.com/phoebe-bermans-gonna-lose-it SUBSCRIBE TO THE BNC CHANNEL: https://bit.ly/45Pspyl  Ad Free & Bonus Episodes: https://bit.ly/3OZxwpr This week, Brooke and Connor try to figure out what’s going on in space, recap their first live show, and talk about building their commune. Plus, Connor is fear mongering again and Brooke is moving to La Jolla.  Join our Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/groups/5356639204457124/  Go to https://HelloFresh.com/bandc10fm now to Get 10 Free meals + Free Nutribullet® Ultra Plus+ 2-in-1 Compact Kitchen System (a $189.99 value) on your 3rd box. Free meals applied as a discount on the first box, new subscribers only, varies by plan. Disclaimer: Must order the 3rd box by May 31st, 2026. Join for free at https://rakuten.com or download the Rakuten app to start saving money today Bath & Body Works candles not only smell amazing, but are crafted with premium, lead-free wicks for a clean, safe burn. Shop the White Barn Neutrals collection now at https://bathandbodyworks.com! Our listeners can buy one prescription pair and get 20% off additional pairs at https://WarbyParker.com/BNC  — and using our link helps support the show. #WarbyParker #ad B+C IG: https://www.instagram.com/bncmap/ B+C Twitter: https://twitter.com/bncmap TMG Studios YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/tinymeatgang TMG Studios IG: https://www.instagram.com/realtmgstudios/ TMG Studios Twitter: https://twitter.com/realtmgstudios BROOKE https://www.instagram.com/brookeaverick https://twitter.com/ladyefron https://www.tiktok.com/@ladyefron  CONNOR https://www.instagram.com/fibula/ https://twitter.com/fibulaa https://www.tiktok.com/@fibulaa Hosted by Brooke Averick & Connor Wood, Created by TMG Studios, Brooke Averick & Connor Wood, and Produced by TMG Studios, Brooke Averick & Connor Wood. Chapters: 0:00 The Bangs Are Out 1:05 Intro 1:25 Men With Bangs 6:22 The Definition of Lap 7:46 Fear Mongering On The Pod 9:40 Brooke’s New Ecosystem 11:45 Connor’s Latest Dream 14:50 Building Connor’s Ecosystem 16:40 HelloFresh 18:31 Rakuten 19:48 Space Thoughts 25:38 Outerspace Candles 27:16 San Diego 33:22 Life Spans 36:35 Escaping Fear 39:45 Bath & Body Works 41:01 Warby Parker 42:38 Bye Bye Wifi 46:38 Shows We Love 48:49 The Drama 53:34 More Bangs & Being Opaque  58:21 Getting Dune 1:01:42 Vaginal Mesh  1:05:08 Jury Duty  1:06:27 See You In Bonus!!! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Are we recording the episode? See, that's what I'm saying. No, no, no, no, no. I have something that I thought about this morning. I was getting up. I was cleaning no meal off my pants because I'd spilled a lot in my lap. Isn't it funny when you stand up, your lap disappears? Your bangs are out today.

Oh. What do they look like? I refuse to record with my entire team, my entire team in front of me saying with their chest, they look fine. No, I think, I, you know, I, and then to see in clips posted to the entire internet that they did not in fact look fine. You know, I, you know, I think you should brush your bangs back. Okay. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, that's perfect. I had my hair down in the car today. Yeah, yeah, yeah. My jet. Hair off. Let me just double check.

No, that looks great. No, you just put them back down. No, I put a little wispies down. You don't like the wispies? No, it's not, there's a, there's a thicker. This part? Yeah, put that back. No, like you did before.

Yeah. I just feel like it gives it too much volume when I zooge it like that. No, you need your hair back off of your face so we can see your beautiful face. Oh my God. Okay. Sorry, you're saying. No, no, no, it's good. It's just like it's weird that I'll never be able to explore a world with bangs

because like unanimously like no one thinks they look good and it's just it's just weird that like I was hey listen man not everyone is but I know but it's just weird that like I see my face every single day like I sit in the mirror I know my face I know the way it's shaved and I go yeah I like this like this is fun and like 100% not one person on the planet you know why likes it because no one has an accurate understanding of how they look just you have a different understanding of the way you look that makes you think like yeah I'm going to do these bangs and then everyone else can let you know like no champ it's just crazy the the conviction with which people are like what are you doing you know it's not even like a hesitation it's like how dare you well even just in general like men don't wear

their hair like that man some men have bangs not like that not like that what do you mean you're you were doing like a thick zohy de chenelle bang I thought was it It was like a nice, classy, like, Ian Summerholder bang. No, he has, like, Justin Bieber-like hair. You have curlier hair. It's pretty straight today. No. Watch.

You know, this is just giving Ian Summerholder? I don't. It's not a match. It's not, yeah, that's different. How? That's going to, I'm sorry. That's different. I don't see how it's different at all.

It just is. That's exactly. And you know what? Can I be honest? On the one hand, like, yeah, he can pull it off. On the other hand, he should push his hair back. Really? Yes. I don't think I've seen a man with bangs where I'm like, yeah, keep them.

Keep your hair like that. We've gone over this. You've seen several men with bangs. No, that's a different thing. I think it was a sole patch we were looking into. It was a sole patch. Yeah. God, and I can't do either. Yeah, no. He should, Timothy Shalomey should push his hair back in this photo.

Yeah. I think Leonardo Caprio. Can I be? It's a little bit different. It's a little bit different. Why? Because he is straight hair. Oh, okay. Connor Story can do bangs. Because he's like, he's a different vibe.

Okay. We can keep exploring. No, I just think that there needs to be a solution that like everyone is on board with. And it needs to include some bang for me. You sometimes have, when you have whips, that's fine. You can't do a full thick. Like, yeah, you're doing like micro bangs. Like micro bob?

Yeah. You can't be doing that. I can't do that. Not a lot of people can do that. So you, like the wet look I could do, the wet look. No one said anything about a wet look. What do you mean, wet look? I don't know, maybe I get out of the water.

I'm sure. Everyone's hair is different wet. Yeah. You can totally do a wet look. This is my hair wet, wet. Is he? Calling in the troops. Do you know what I'm talking about?

This is my hair a little wet. This is my hair wet wet. Does Jack Martin have bangs? Jack Martin has had bangs. But he has that straight silken hair, you know? He's also good. And he pushes it back. He could do anything he wants, obviously, with his.

See, but he has like, he does whips. He's not doing full blunt, Bob. Can you click on that second picture of him and the, uh... Yeah, that's scary. It's just one of the, like, Like, if I saw this photo on shrooms, I would cry. They are identical. I mean, it would freak me out.

It would scare me. That's, the outfit on the right is probably one of the biggest atrocities that has ever happened to mankind. I wonder, listen, I love the guy. Me too. I wonder what he thinks about it looking back. He legitimately looks like, hey, we saw you from across the bar. We loved your vibe. It's so

And again, like this is an example Of someone trying something Yes You can always do I know, I know, I know, I know I know. But what I'm excited about is that Every time I've tried bang, someone has stepped in Because I have good relationships

Good healthy relationships He has someone out to get him And this Maybe it looked different in person I can't imagine it I can't imagine Anyway What were you saying before I interrupted you?

Oh What an amazing callback and what an amazing thing that I'm remembering what I was going to say. I was just cleaning something off my lap earlier and I'm sitting up and I'm going like this and I'm like, where's my lap when you stand up? Lap no longer exists when you're standing. Are you sure? This? For those of you who aren't on the studio, the way that the Kelly Clarkson just breathed out a long, exhaust inside. Connor sit up

so I'm like so long like miserable okay yeah I know she's baby can we look up the definition of lap lap can only exist while sitting a lap generally does not exist when standing

a lap is defined as the horizontal service form between the knees and the waist of a person awesome Yeah, sit on my, yeah, sit on my lap. Right. You couldn't sit on your lap. Yeah. On my front piece.

Nice, nice, nice, nice, nice. When you're standing it, it's just your frontal. Yeah. Your full frontal. So that's really just the only thing that I thought about this morning. And it's been a little bit crazy of the morning because I, like, hop on Twitter. There was a world when I used to hop on Twitter and I'm like, oh, there's some fun stuff for Brooke and I to talk about. Today, um, will be known as.

potentially that are like the podcast that comes out with the announcement of World War three which is kind of fun because we just talked about are you starting with your mongering early i'm going to get it out of the way yeah but that's just like what everyone's kind of talking about right now but everyone talks about that all the time i know it's a big day for the people and i think that you've been engaging with that type of content or it's like i'd be shocked if your twitter page was anything but there's some fun stuff like i haven't open Twitter in like months let me see what mine is yeah yeah for example like I'm telling you like you're skewed yeah I do get I do get real no offense but this Ilya body count discourse is

outing y'all is virgins because what do you mean you think his body count is 30 that's my first tweet I'm in the Ilya body count space discourse space okay mine is harpenter music video Sydney Sweeney Interesting I can't decide if it's Sydney Sweeney boob job conspiracy Yeah Who is this

Oh this is Paul Okay I see Yeah I need to stop doing that I guess I think maybe Twitter first thing in the morning Is like before I have I guess it is like reading the newspaper though I can't decide if it's good for me or like

Really effing me up I think effing Yeah Yeah, interesting. Yeah. Anyway, I wanted to show you this. I've totally, and I'm sorry that this is a visual component, but I have a total new ecosystem that I think like you would want. It's looking so fat.

Well, because remember I told you, like you can, you get these like leather things and you stick multiple notebooks in them. Yeah. So this is the my leather portfolio thing that I made. The way. Look, wait, first of all, you need a close. Here it is closed. You have. Okay, check this out.

100% manifested in real life the chocolate episode of SpongeBob where they're selling the bag within the bag. No. Yes, that's it. It's not the same thing. It's a journal within a holder, within a holder, within a bigger journal. Well, it's just a way to keep all of your journals connected. Because look, here's my one journal. You open it.

Just kidding. There's three in here. Kind of like when they unzips the big bag and there was a bunch of little bags of chocolate. The bar with the Hobanichi. Here's this little pouch that I can. keep random shit in. Okay. This is my diary.

Beauty. Okay. And now here's my dream journal. So I can keep them all in one spot. Because weren't you saying you need to, because you grab the wrong journal the other day. Yes. You would not grab the wrong journal if you just had both of them on hand to me. I know, you know that I'm going to do this too.

Get one of these. I'm going to do this. Are you? Yeah. Okay. Because I'm starting to hate my phone. I am, literally this has changed my life. Yeah.

Like the way I'm writing in my journal so much because I like the way it looks and the way that I'm I said I need to get another little journal to add something because I need more things so right now I have a dream journal and now I'm saving random ass shit like your delcarts yeah I've only one dream in here that I can't share it's not really politically correct as your subconscious being it cancelable yeah I think I would get in trouble if I read this but it's not my fault it's not it's the inner mechanisms of your I don't know if, I don't know if this is, I can read it in the bonus. Like, I'm not sure if this is, it's not my fault.

Yeah. I mean, I had a dream last night, which I know no one could give one less of a shit about. But I was just like in my hotel room. And when I, I was like kind of lucid because it's like Christmas Eve. Every time we record the podcast, I'm so excited to get here that like, I don't want to miss it. You know? So I'm like, up, kind of. And I'm like thinking about what we could talk about.

And then I kind of. go to sleep and I come to him lucid and I'm in my hotel room but it was my like our game room in my parents house and I looked to my left and my dog who's now passed away is there in my dream and so I go speak to him because he's laying in kind of a weird weird way did your dog ever die yeah the yeah socky yeah socky died did you tell us I don't know I think you just let it go yeah he passed on You never said a word. Oh, yeah.

Sorry. Was that like a year ago at this point? Not quite. Did him and Max ever overlap? No. I must remember him dying. He must have said something. I don't think so because I had gone home and I knew that it was probably the last.

I think, yeah. Of the Mohicans. That's a movie. I don't know why that just came to mind. And one of our last comings and goings and I filmed on Snapchat of all places. Like that sucks my last memory with my life. family dog that I've had for my whole life is on Snapchat. And it keeps popping up like seven years ago today.

You had some awesome cuddles. And it's like the last time with my family dog. He did not die seven years ago. It will pop. I mean like when I'm 58 years old and I get my seven years ago today and it's my family dog and I'm on Snapchat, like in my memories. Yeah. So he's now passed.

But in the dream, very much alive. To my chagrin, I walk up. to him and I say something to him. I don't really recall what I say. He responds in Japanese and it's a man's deep Japanese voice and I look closer. Sorry I died.

Brooke like full blown but it was in Japanese so I didn't know and then I look closer his oh my God I know why it happened it's his butt and his butt is a Japanese man's face fair-skinned speaking to me and then I shake him and his head turns

and now the Japanese man has gone off of his butt. It's like Professor Quarrel and Voldemort. Completely. But you know why that happened? Why? Because over the weekend I was talking to someone about one of cartoons that I used to watch and of course we're going through all of the horrors

Invader Zim. Yeah. Curse a Cowardly Dog. Then I hit one that like really snuck through the radar. Cat Dog. Cat dog That's why I had That's why I had the dream about Soki's

Sacchi's butt being an Asian man's face Japanese man's face I know that Well this is kind of my dream journal Because I see everything here But holy moly Can I make you your journal? Yeah I would love that

I will Venmo I would love to do that for you I would love to do that That would be amazing It would be fun to have two I'm gonna the next episode Oh no I can't do the next episode Because that's like tomorrow

Oh my God Here's what Maybe if I can get my shit together I'll give it to you at the live show tomorrow How would you do that before tomorrow? I would have to be really motivated We can see it we can check back in Because now they have this type of stuff at like Barnes & Noble

Do they? Yeah Wow Not they not at my barns they don't have like a good leather situation But I can try and find something Oh how fabulous that's so exciting I think that'll be fabulous

Yeah That would be nice to actually get my my pen to paper. Should I tell you what I'm going to do? Or do you just want to be surprised? Unless you really want to tell me what you're going to do. I'm going to include three little notebooks in it. Okay.

Oh my God, no. I'm going to literally blow your shit up. I can't wait. Oh, I can't wait. Thank you. Yeah, you're welcome. I'm really excited. I'm really excited.

Because this is now like, I don't know if you saw it click for me today. This just made you click. Click. Click. Yeah, because yesterday I was writing a lot yesterday. and I was like, there is absolutely no value to my notes app on my phone. Like I don't feel any drawn towards it in any way. It doesn't inspire me.

It makes me, I have to unlock my phone. It doesn't feel good, you know? Oh, I'm thinking, like, my brain is firing rapid speed figuring out what your sections are going to be. Oh, how exciting. Wow. I love that. So hot. I do too.

Why do I love that? Aligned. We're aligned. Hey guys, you want to take a quick break to thank a sponsor of today's episode. HelloFresh. Picture this for me real quick. It's the middle of the week. You're tired.

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New shoes? What is that? Papa's got one time, Papa needs a new pair of shoes. Ladders, shoots and ladders, shoots and ladders, snakes and ladders, Spongebob. Oh. Snake guy, snake guy, snake guy, snake guys, snakes and ladders? What is the game? Gary needs a new pair of shoes.

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that we just went to the moon again and it's the farthest away we've ever been. Can you think about this number for a second without vomiting? 255,000 miles from Earth? I have an... I genuinely cannot conceptualize numbers.

To me, like I don't see the difference in my head between 255,000 and 255 million. One's bigger. No, obviously one's bigger, but like it doesn't make... It doesn't, I can't see that. You know how I think of space? Hmm.

Like a bay in the ocean. Like all of, like the moon is Loki like our little boat. You should watch Project Hail Mary. Did you watch it? No, because I need to read the book first. But like I think my understanding of it is that it's like a really wholesome story. And it might reclaim the way you feel about space. I used to not even mind space, but now I'm just like shaking, crying, throwing up, thinking about it, being out there.

And it's like crazy that we just all go day to day. being like, yeah, of course. What did that, did we like of, like, they bred that out of us? We're just like not scared. We're not thinking about it. That's crazy that we're all just like, time to clock in it.

J.P. Morgan, you know? And it's like, not to be like the dude that's like, we're all floating on a big giant rock and we're so small and nothing really matters. Space really doesn't bother me. I have two quick things. Yeah. Our East Space. One.

The Mariana Trench bothers me. I've been to Mariana, Mariana's. You haven't been down. No. Down, down, down. You haven't been to the bottom. No, I haven't been to the bottom of Marianna's trench. Yeah.

I've been on top of her. That's fine. Yeah. Yeah. In Guam. In Guam. Yeah. Off of Guam.

Yeah. Off of Guam. Yeah. Off of Guam. Yeah. Yeah. It was lovely. And I do remember.

That's probably my first memory, which we talk about memories all the time. That's probably my first memories. I remember the glass bottom boat. Yeah. Wow. I want to go on a boat. The GBB.

I would be throwing up, I mean, every five seconds. That's all I remember. There's a couple fish and stuff. One thing I was going to say about them going to around the moon type shit is the toilet broke. Ooh. I guess I never thought about going to the bathroom in space. They all had to wear diapers. Yeah, which is such a bummer.

Like, we need to provide better for our. astronauts. If we can't get the bat... Wait, so do they just dispose of it in orbit? See, this is the part that like makes me... The idea of them throwing their dirty diapies just like out into the void is just very crazy to me. Are they? It was a clever solution that most of fecal use. Maybe that's more...

Astronauts reported a faint burning smell coming from the hygiene bay, heating insulation. P receptacle Okay, but are they putting everything Into the orbit? We're just skimming through this Vent line used to dump P into space Nice Okay

I just like Imagine Imagine you're on a road trip Okay So you're going to Coachella You're going out to Palm Springs You're going out to the desert Really got to go

Really got to go There's nowhere to stop now I want you to take that and I want you to quadruple by 255,000 miles and then I want you to think about you if you have a diaper on then you could just go you have no problem with that obviously it's not ideal I wonder if I could because I remember when I was little and I wanted attention and I was like I'm going to pee in my pants for attention right now and I couldn't like it's just like it doesn't my body wouldn't let me so I wonder if it would let me I guess if it was an emergency because I've gone in my pants accidentally recently not recently at all but like more recently

than I prefer only my 20s yeah um I don't think I could pee in my pants is what I'm trying to say yeah just like in front of your co-workers pooping your diabetes I think it it was coming out it's coming out of course and I don't think I could just be like, I'm pooping now. I think it would only happen if it was like an emergency slipping out. Hi, this is international space station. We are all pooping now. Hi.

Anyway. If you're having to announce it, like, oh, that's funny. That's funny. I feel like it's more awkward if you don't. Is there smell in space? There is. I don't think gravity, does anything to that.

To smell? No, because smell is like, I think like floating particles. Do you know that if you, space has a distinct pungent smell cleaning in their suits after space. Hot metal, seared steak and welding fumes and gunpowder. What is going on in space? God. Jinkies.

Oh my God. Like imagine a space candle and under it. It's like notes of hot metal, seared steak, welding fumes and spend. gun powder. It's just a Texas roadhouse. Okay. And then to add on top of that? Yeah.

Dirty diaper. Yeah. Dirty adult diaper. 250,000 miles away from the nearest bathroom diaper. It's not awesome. Oh my God. Things would start to really fade of importance. Like, we are up in space.

We're doing whatever they're doing to the moon. I don't really know what they're up to up there. Imagine just having to pee so bad. Like, I would be like, I don't, whatever. Like, take a picture. Take the picture. Outer space scented candle. We should get one for this dude.

Astronauts describe the smell as a mix of gunpowder. Oh, yeah, I already know that. Raspberrys and rum. Oh, that sounds nice. Gunpowder, seared steak, raspberries and rum. There's no way. That sounds good to me. Gunpowder and steak.

Yeah, it's the same way like I like the smell of gas. But would you like it mixed with like raspberries and gunpowder? I truly think that sounds like an awesome yellowstone themed candle. There's the best smell to me is when you're driving into Ocean City, New Jersey, and you're passing Egg Harbor, and it just smells like beach eggs. That's my- Like sulfur? Yeah.

So farts. Yeah, but it's like beach farts. So it's fine because it's like the source is, it's coming from the beach. Fart beach, the beach that makes you fart. Egg fart beach. Like that, I love that. That's so gross. You just said you like gasoline.

So it's not that different. I'm pooping now. I want to talk about San Diego. Okay. Can we touch on San Diego in one second? There was that space thing and then there was, who cares? Yes, talk about San Diego.

Well, we went, we had a live show in San Diego. We had our first live show. It was fabulous. Thank you all for coming to it. That was so fun. That theater was amazing. What a great first show. Great first show.

Thank you for coming. If you came to our OG for a show, Thank you for coming. Like, very sweet, very grateful for you. Like, this felt like a real, real first show. It was great. But what I want to talk about is that was kind of really my first time in San Diego. Okay.

I went to the zoo once before. And then I also went when we evacuated for the fires, but like we didn't really leave the house. Yeah. But this was like I was in San Diego. And I went to La Jolla the day after the show. This is my first town. Shit. I meant to wear my La Jolla hat and t-shirt today.

Dang. Well, luckily we're recording three times this week. I'll do tomorrow. Yeah, I'll do tomorrow. Oh, I'll wear it to the live show tomorrow. The people of Irvine might not love that. No, I know. That's true.

Anyway, this is my first time hyperfixating on a town. Love that. Well, you had projected that a little bit because you were so excited for your beachfront town. I was so excited for your beachfront town. I was so excited for a front town. But guess what? What? Well, first of all, what struck me about La Jollae was the wildlife. The seals and the water. The water is crystal clear blue like you're in a swimming pool and in Europe. The seals are just

swimming about living their best life. A squirrel gave me a high five. I felt like Jane Godal. Like so in touch with creatures. Yeah. I just felt like we are all one. And imagine I'm walking away from the seals. I see someone holding a bag. Bookstore and stationery shop. Wow. I go to the bookstore and stationery shop, Warwick's, heaven on earth. The only problem is that prevents me from being able to set up my bookstore in La Jolla because I don't want any bad blood.

I don't, you never want to be the store that open, that is the competition. The spite store. You don't want to be the spite store. So I would have to go to a different town Or is it different enough When you're doing books, cats And a bunch of other And a cafe as well

I think it's still not right Because you're still selling books So it's healthy to have some level of I just don't know if you're going to find a town Without a bookstore I really don't know Well I think what I'm really saying And is at the crux of this is

I need to make my own town I think that's really what it is. So I think I need to find an empty piece of land. On the coastline? Along the coastline. Oh, yes, yes. And then that's when I really start up the bookstore, the cafe. Someone can do the local grocer.

And it's literally just what a town needs, the necessities, all within like a very small area. A cult. So it's technically its own. Yes. But put a positive spin on that. A commune. By the way, I've told you before, I'm like very on board with joining. Yeah, no, I know that.

Yeah. Yeah. So I think what I'm looking for is not to join a town. It's to be the town. Right. I think that's what I'm kind of figuring out. But anyway, I think I'm going to move to La Jolla. Okay.

While I figure my shit out. Yeah. Yeah. I get that. I just, it was an amazing. I can't even get over it. I can't believe it's been two hours away this whole time. It is funny that way.

California's just all of these different maps Why is the water so blue and it's so brown here? Different mayor? I don't think that's why. I don't know. There's just a lot of people here. It seems like it's a crazy difference. Like it's not even, it doesn't even seem like the same element.

But you can literally just pull up Google Maps and do like worldview and you can see or like that. It is definitely the same. same ocean. Yeah. No, I'm saying like if you scroll up to Malibu or if you scroll south to like Manhattan Beach even, it's like blue, poop, blue. Yeah, Manhattan Beach. Beach is even a lot bluer.

But like it still doesn't even compare it at La Jolla. I know, I don't know. I mean either. Different sand for sure. I'm not talking about the sand. Well, the sand makes it, yeah. La Jolla's water appears bluer and clearer to its rocky canyon adjacent geography. Oh, it's the canyon and protected marine areas that reduce sediment and algae.

Conversely, Santa Monica Beachwater often appears greener or murkier due to shallow sandy bottoms. Hi, Sandy bottoms. Oh. Yeah, I guess I get that. The human-made sedimentation. I got in the water the other day and I was just like having the time. Oh, it was like right before we went down to San Diego and I was swimming, I was gurgling. Ah, la la la la.

I was like, is like actually, maybe I'm. Hmm Looks different than usual Get Out Dangerously high levels of bacteria Do not swim Every hole I think you're fine

I really do Okay Imagine how much worse Our ancestors had it They didn't have signs You know Who knows where they were putting their bodies They also died at like 32

That's true So That is true And I think we might be making a couple more ounces of trash and garbage and poisonous. You know what I want to see? I want to see a chart that's like average lifespans and the time periods. We can probably L.

It might scare me. Well today, oh my gosh, I have an incredible announcement for you. Today's the day that we all stop aging and no one else is born and no one dies. That's today. Yay. Yeah, how exciting. Congratulations. Yeah.

Happy day. I can show you more into that right after. we look up the lifespans that are now irrelevant. Okay, so 1816. It's unfortunately in chart form, like bar graph and shit like that, which is hard for me right now. I don't know why there's so many lines. I feel like there could just be one.

Just tell me. Just tell me with words. This looks like an echocardiogram. From around the early. Middle ages. Well, Middle Ages is a wide range. 30 to 40. frequent dips due to plague and famine.

In the 1800s, it was still 30 to 40. 1900s to 1950s rapid increases began 45 to 48. Wait, why is it only 72 to 73 now? That's the average? Oh, I don't like that. Don't love that either. But good news is... I'm really in the mood for a medical advance.

You know, it would blow chunks. if like a massive like you get to be frozen at like 30 type of advance came when we were like 92 like completely no I don't know that's the golden years apparently 92 yeah we just wouldn't be like fucking and sucking like we used to aging listen I'm fine I just don't want to my body to break down and decay totally I think that that means we have to be proactive now with vitamins I'm fine dying at 95 as long as I love like my years my 95 years are good and healthy and I have a body that is kind to me and I'm kind to my body yeah your body is a it's a wonderland I do I have that in my notes of like jokes and just says your body's a wonder what I thought

was like I feel like you've done it before like if you transcript search TMG body is wonderland like I bet you'd find you doing that joke. I do test a lot of jokes here and the way that they don't land. We know. They don't land here. And then I go and I do them somewhere else. I'm like, man, they didn't work for a reason. Does any remember the episode where they talked about?

Wow. Oh my God, legume? Wait, we talked. I looked. Wow, that's real crazy. Your mind. Wow. Like, it's amazing.

Like, it's like an amazing place. Wow. Your body's a wonderland. Whoa, I wipe my nose on the mic. They really did it well, the transcript. It really led us right to your body's in Wonderland. Is that, I just straight up, it's like, your body's a wonderland? Oh, cat looks so different.

I'm like, your mind. She's blonde. You're mine? My teeth are massive. Wow. Like, it's like an amazing place. You are what to continue to wipe your door. It's with the mic.

Is there anything else you want to search? No. Okay. But yesterday I was watching basketball. I don't have shit going on right now I was watching basketball I do You should have watched basketball

Yesterday with me The NCAA No I had to finish jury duty Which by the way you still haven't watched Well I'm excited to Well I need to be watching that at the same time With other people Because now I know

Well now I'm gonna end up seeing What do you telling me like It really didn't turn me on too much The way that you were like Yeah it's just not like the same It's not at all the same and I don't think they should continue but the last episode was so bad

it was amazing. Okay. Like it's so bad that it's good. Okay. Does that make sense? Okay, yeah. Oh, you know what? We should have searched just now like something that we said again and I kind of want to like just stop talking about certain stuff we talked about the undersea internet cables that you brought up

and then Iran threatened to cut them like the week after. Iran's dead ass about to cut the cord. Isn't like who is? Who is that? listening to this podcast. This is what I'm wondering. Is it just that we're discovering things that like people already know about and are already talking about and it's like obvious and we're just discovering them because they're now in the zeitgeist or are people listening to us? There's no telling the absolute breadth of our viewership. Like I don't really know. Iran has threatened to cut the undersea cables in the Persian Gulf that provide a global internet connectivity. Oh, we have to do something

because it's all I have right now to get me through the day is to fear monger and doom scroll. Honestly, I need to finish my book. My horrible, horrible book. If someone cut the cord and I did not have access to the internet and the world didn't have access to the internet for like a while until we got the cords repaired, it could be another classic example of like something horrible happening and it kind of ending up being beautiful. Everyone COVID happened and it was obviously horrible, but then everyone started going on walks and it was kind of beautiful. it could be another one of those things. Brooke, kiss your brain. Well said.

Like way to think beyond where I put us into a fear-mongering corner and you said, hold my hand, I'm going to take you out of this place. Yeah, it could be a classic example of a light in the dark. 100% except I do think that we have reached a place where that would be catastrophic type shit. I'm not saying it wouldn't be catastrophic. Like I mean you're saying like imagine we just like can't get on Instagram.

I think it's more like world like like economies would crumble and things. Connor and I'm agreeing with you the same way that COVID like was also that bad like really about a bad thing. You got to look for that sliver of light. I eat people going on walks. They cut the cables for the global internet. People might start to think about going on walks again. Maybe you want to walk around your name about every once in one. People might start to think about going on walks again.

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The ones I always wear on here, the frames are Warby Parker and also so are the lenses. They're just really good quality. I've gotten so many compliments on them in the comment section that I read all the time and they just feel a lot more elevated than other glasses that I've had. Yeah. I've had a lot. Also, the price point is a huge plus. Their prescription glasses start at $95, so you're getting something stylish and well-made without spending a ton. They also have everything. Contacts, you know, my contacts are, I got them for more. That was shocking to me. I didn't. Well, it's not like Warby, like brand, but it's like they get you the contacts via the eye exam that they do. One stuff shop. Yeah, exactly. It's incredible. Contacts, sunglasses.

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Yeah. I think that like planes would loki fall out of the sky. But what do I know? I was, you know what I was? Planes wouldn't fall out. Izzy, would you mind Googling will planes fall out of the sky if you cut the, what are those called? Internet.

If my Wi-Fi goes out, will the plane fall? No, people flew planes without Wi-Fi for a long time. It's easy to forget that. No, cutting underwater cables will not cause planes fall out of the sky. You're fear-mongering. It's just where your head goes. We've got to turn that. You know what I think will help you in journaling?

You know what if, you know what be crazy? If, like, Google gave, pulled up a clip of art as a source of, like, a question that we typed in. It was like, no, according to. According to Montgomery podcast in 2020. Planes will not be falling out of the sky today this afternoon. Okay, here's what happened. There was a really, no. Significant disruptions to internet banking communications and digital services occur affecting national economies.

Boom, kiss my brain. planes are capable of navigation and safe landing without internet connectivity because I think they have radios there was a really scary episode of criminal minds where there was uh i guess it was terrorism but this terrorist was targeting like individual commercial planes one by one and just hacking the mainframe of the planes that's not even okay because i don't know again we don't know who's listening well it's an episode of criminal minds it's already out oh it's been out for years I hope that that is not possible. I'm saying that to me, like,

scarier than serial killers. It was scary all than serial kill us. So. Seriously. It's crazy. Yeah. So anyway, I think I spelled chord wrong.

I wrote in my notes, Iran cutting the chord, but I spelled it, C-H-O-R-D, like the musical chord. But is that, that's not how you spell this type of word, right? Yeah. Yeah.

So this is like, Yeah. so I spelled it wrong which is it goes to show you like that's a great reason like I shouldn't be talking about this if I can't spell court I don't know I think you can have a general

grasp on something without being able to spell I don't know can I be negative again and then I'm gonna snap out of it I'm gonna snap out of it because I think I'm usually pretty positive about in the general way I don't agree really yeah just recently I've been pretty negative and I'm projecting it

from a personal space. But, um, you know when we were all going on walks and playing Pokemon Go and stuff and everyone was like, look at how our phones are like getting us outside. The company was storing all the data from us playing Pokemon Go to like train AI to or to give to create models for like way mouse to be able to drive on the streets because we were like filming streets and landmarks and.

Oh really? Yeah. Like people, you see people do that now like set up cameras and like get like Google Earth photos. Like we. were doing that for them. Mm-hmm. Oh, cool. At least it was fun.

I fucked with Pokemon Go. I know you did. So heavily that it, like, got in the way of living my life. I know. Like, I would just, I lived, because I was still living at home and I lived by a train station. Mm-hmm. I mean, I would wake up in the middle of the night, like 3 a.m. Check Pokemon Go. There would be an extremely rare creature at the train station.

I would sprint in my booty shorts and slippers. to the train station, dangerous, dangerous thing to do. But I got that, I got a, I got a, catch them all. Yeah, for sure. Sure. And then I took my, I got my phone jail broken to access the rare Tomogachi that you could only, not Tomogachi.

Pokemon. The rare Pokemon that you could only get in Japan. So I was able to go to Japan via my Pokemon Go and my bedroom. Yeah, I took it extremely seriously. Women in STEM. Hey. There's a Super Mario movie. I'm gonna go see, by the way.

Apparently, it's good. Of course it is. I love Jack Black. Me too. Oh, did you watch us now? No, did you? I watched him, I watched the five-timers clubs. I watched the clips.

Yeah. I'm a big clip girl. I love clips. I love clips. My dad just said that he's watching a show right now that Will Arnett's in. Like a newer show. Oh, I need to start watching GTF. Yeah.

I actually kind of dropped the ball because I've been only able to access Netflix. No, I've been watching St. Dennis Medical. I know. It is so genuinely good. For real? I'm being so Jen. So many shows are trying to be the office and it's not landing. But this show is also trying to be the office and it's landing a little bit more.

Because they look at the camera longer or what? I don't know what it is exactly about the. I think it's just genuinely good writing. That's what doesn't exist right now. And the main woman is so funny. Wendy something. She was in bridesmaid. Reno 911.

Yeah, that woman. Oh, did we speak about this already? Now it's all coming back to me now, Celine DiL. Yeah, and now it's on Netflix. Yeah, I do want to start watching because I feel like I could use something light. It's light and funny and like you can be on your phone. I can be on my phone getting scared while I watch something light and funny. Yeah.

Your bangs fell down. Gosh. But it's fine. You know what? You would look good in one of those headbands. Like where I fell in the doll? Yes. Oh, I have one.

You should do that. Really? Yeah, I think you look a good day to day. Yeah. Or you should try it for the live show tomorrow. Wear a headband to the live show tomorrow? Yeah. I'd be worried what people would say about me.

This guy's in a headband. Be honest about what's going on and you're experimenting. As long as you're honest and there's clear communication, no one's going to be talking about it. As long as you talk about it first. That's what I've learned. Get ahead of it. Yeah. I know what you're thinking.

Is he in a headband? Yes. I'm trying new things with my body. So then obviously no one's going to be like, Connor, being a freak in a headband. You already took care of it. I know. I wasn't being a freak either.

I was just trying something. I want to talk about the drama because I saw it. You can talk about it. I don't know if I'll get my butt up to go see it. You have got to see the drama. One of the, I think it's the best movie I've seen in 2026. Go, go see it.

I did not want to, I didn't even think about like my phone for the entire moment. movie. Usually like even if a movie's good towards the end, I'm like, all right, let's wrap this up. Like I'm ready to play fruit merge or something. Not once did I think that during this film. In fact, I was like, I hope it goes longer. How long is it? Perfect length. It was like 145 or something. Well done. It was so good and so unique and really, really made you think. And I know it's being marketed is like there's this big twist. I don't I didn't really align with

that. It didn't feel like there was like a huge twist. It just felt like, oh, this is the plot. This is a plot point in the film. It's like not necessarily like where you're expecting the film to go. But when people were like, oh, there's this huge twist, I thought it was going to be like, it's all a movie or it's all a dream. Or like a movie within a movie, like something like black mirrory.

But it's just like the plot goes in a direction that you might not. Okay. I'll watch it. It's really, really good. Can I watch it? I'll watch it before we record again. Yeah.

Maybe not before we were recording. We will probably, we will record again tomorrow and the next day and the next day. Not tomorrow. That's tomorrow. But we have to show tomorrow. But it was fabulous, phenomenal.

My friend Rob just absolutely knocked it out of the park. Zendaya incredible. Alana Heim was really good. Yeah. She's a big part. Wow. She played probably one of the most

unlikable characters. characters ever. I'm so dumb that when I see someone play an unlikable character, I genuinely don't, I can't wrap my head around enjoying their personality. Yeah. That is good acting. I think that will happen to you with her, but she's amazing in real life. I just, she was on, um, something recently. She had a, she, she, she was in one battle after another, right? I don't know. I never saw that, but I think she was. That was a, that one, that threw me, threw me around in circles, and loop, loop vibes. I don't think so

Yeah she's in one battle after another Yeah she's really acting a lot Good for her Yeah The drama was fabulousity Squared Zendaya is in So think about this

The drama Which I don't know how it's doing In theaters I think really good Okay so the drama Dune She's in a Marvel movie this year And I think she's in two more

What Marvel movie is Spider-Man? Yeah I think is it Spider-Man? I think there's another Spider-Man this year. She's going to make, like, genuinely, genuinely, genuinely, genuinely, genuinely, genu-so, half a billion dollars this year. She's in Spider-Man. Oh, it's absolutely coming out in July.

That's coming out in July. Yeah, I mean, she's not strapped for cash. How do you do five movies in a year? Well, they're probably all filmed in different times and even different years. Yeah, but even just press I mean, I would be completely drained Okay But I think like a lot of it is like

And I'm talking out of my ass As I'm not an actor But I'm sure there are a lot of years Where it's like you're not doing any press And you're just filming And then there are years when you're just doing press And you're not filming, you know? Yeah

And then it's kind of just like That's your job Sunday is disappearing from the public eye After four movies in 2026 Hope you don't get sick of me I couldn't We couldn't Can I read that?

First comment. She's probably in the early stages of being pregnant and she will come back when she's totally. So glad I read that. I can never be sick of Zendaya, breathtaking beauty and style. I agree. Timeless. Self-awareness.

That person's like, yeah, we were getting tired. Do you think she would like you? I was just thinking if she would like me. I don't know what that. Yeah, because I think that if she squinted and maybe if she was underwater. Oh, I forgot. I was underwater as well. Maybe she'd be like, is that my film?

He's like, I love her. Yeah. Yeah. They're married. Yeah. My husband. Yeah. But I'm talking about like, imagine you to bag over your head.

Would she like your personality? I think so. I have a handful of people that genuinely with their chest don't like me. And I think I'm pretty aware of it. Yeah. And I stand with them. But I think in general, like if it was just a... You're likable.

Yeah. I think that we could have a good... We could have some good chat. Is he, would you mind looking up Tom Holland, bang? Let's see if he ever tried it. I think my bangs look more like Zendaya's here. Tom Holland bangs. Oh.

Oh, is that what you're going for? That is what you're going for, isn't it? Is that what I look like? Well, his hair's wet, remember? A wet look. We were talking about that. He's doing wet look. Oh, here.

But he's like so young there. Yeah, I guess what makes you look young when you do it. I don't mind looking a little young. No, but young like 13, not like 25. Gotcha. Okay. Well, he does usually push his hair back. So he's looking at him with his micros.

He's looking very British in that. Okay. Gotcha. I see. Okay, so my self-awareness personally for me is low. I think I look really great and very cool with bangs, but like I guess maybe I don't know. Can you look,

Izzy, can you look up Connor Woodbangs? Please don't. Let's see. Let's see if there is anything. Hi. That's good. That's bad. It looks like my hairline is receding.

Those are wisps. It looks like, hmm. Oh, yes. Connor Wood steps onto the red carpet. Oh, wait. That was this wig. Okay.

Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Oh, look at you as a little kid. Bottom. See, that's fine to do when you're little.

That is crazy. The opakness of my bangs? I saw this TikTok and I've never resonated with anything more in my life. That looks like. That was like why is the word opaque the most translucent word? I like. You can see through the word opaque, which is why it's always tripped me up and I didn't realize it until someone said that.

Okay, I completely. Opeg to me means see through. I saw that and I completely disagree with you 100%. opaque to me is like hard block OPEC to me it's like bubble letters Like it's bubble butt like bubble buddy Like bubbles Opaic is just a bubble

Opaic the letters are bubble letters That are just made out of bubbles OPEC to me is Stop OPEC to me is Water Model But then you think of the word transparent And well first of all translucent

100% That's like jellyfish Yeah that's giving jellyfish transparent is more like Wind? Slime. Oh. That's what I'm seeing slime.

I love slime. And then opaque is like water to me. Like opaque is the most is more see-through than translucent. Opaic is a wall. In terms of words that I'm seeing in my head. We need to get this young man off of my, off of my FYP. Look how much. Look at the picture next to you.

Like you like look. You have not aged like it's amazing in a good way. Like you're like imagine when you're 50 you're still going to look young. a little bit AI? No, that's wait. That's actually completely artificial talent.

Because the background is not that color in that picture. What is Favicon? Let's find out. Who was Connor Wood? Energizing lifestyle content with humor, brand power,

and cultural relevance. Connor, what is a U.S. based content creator for his comedic skits? Okay, this is just... He frequently collaborates with food and beverages

with food and beverage brands like Wendy's and Celsius, integrating sponsorships and take casual humorous post without breaking tone. Good job, Connor. Thank you so much. He also co-hosts a podcast

that complements his digital presence with longer form conversations. 100%. I completely great. Look, there's your fibs and friends. Yes. That's a great. I love that outfit.

His Instagram content includes random outfit picks, group photos with internet personalities, and comedic captions that contrasts heavily with the visuals. Very good job. His chaotic energy you kind of transfer that into the structured conversations.

He rarely uses traditional CTA language. Instead, he relies on his personal brand to carry partnerships. Great. I don't want to scroll down and see my growth in the past 30 days. It's going to be zero. That's not bad. Wait, that's good. Why is it red?

Why is plus red? Good job, Connor. Thank you guys. Oh, Connor's social media strategy. Can we stop doing this? You have a lot of followers. followers. You have more. No way. Oh, on TikTok? Yeah.

Totally does. Oh my. I was going to say about Dune while we're while we're on the subj. Um, you know Zendaya was just like, Rob was like, I want to be in Dune and she was like, okay, one second. And she made one phone call and then he was just in Dune. Rob was in Dune. He's in the new Dune. He's the new

He's the new worm He's the new worm He's so scary He has my eyebrows He's amazing Wow I don't know what Dune's about Sorry I was assuming that's a breathing apparatus

But I don't know what they're up to It just looks completely miserable It looks like Burning Man if there was like no music It just looks so dumb Like not dumb I know people really like it I just like I really tried to watch

the first movie and I watched where's and day, where is in day, where is and day, almost Googling. Apparently the second one was so good. I can't get into it. Did you guys, did you guys all see it? I'm sorry I just almost called it dumb. I don't think it's dumb. I'm dumb. I don't get it. Did you like it, Grace? Okay. Grace didn't like it either. You didn't like it? Second one. Yeah. I think the first one is kind of, it's like giving like Akitar, where it's like you just have to watch the first one to kind of conceptualize the second one. I need to go get like completely my brain

like maybe my sides are switched. Like I think maybe my right side is supposed to be on my left side type shit. Because I don't get like... Does that happen ever? I don't know. I know what happens with like your colon. You know what I learned recently?

What? If you're unable to take anything seriously and you make jokes about everything, it's usually a common sign of frontal lobe damage and I'm like, well, I've never hit I had very hard. And then someone was like, and the other sign of frontal low damage is you don't remember getting it.

Someone would tell you unless you were completely alone, which would be rare to suffer a traumatic brain injury, like completely alone. It would have to be a traumatic brain injury. But I also, every time I hear the word alone, I think of Squidward with all those tiles in the void. Oh, no, alone. That's the worst. Sponge-Up sometimes hit me in a very panic attack space.

In the book that I'm reading, this woman is a race. So that means her soul can like hop from body to body to body. Good for her. And as a punishment for betraying her government, they took her soul out of its current body, locked it in a box and threw it at the bottom of the ocean. You evil witch. Why did you tell you?

And now it's she's just going to live. Her soul is going to live in eternity in a box at the bottom of the ocean. She's going to go insane for indefinite forever, infinity. Is that not horrible? Like I almost can't think of anything worse. Right now she's in a box. I think they'll get her though, like eventually. You've been there for months though.

If someone puts my soul in a box. I'll let you know if they ever got find her. No, you need to legitimately come get me. I mean, imagine, Connor, like, she's at the equivalent of the bottom of the Mariana trend. with the cable. Okay. So I think that that sounds horrible, but truly that's exactly how I felt when I was doing that survey for money in college. You felt like you were in the box? I felt like I was at that bottom of the ocean. My soul was lost in a box and we were arguing over vaginal meth

mesh, not vaginal meth. Vaginal mesh. No, that was my call about vaginal mesh. No, that was my call center job when I was doing the survey. I didn't know it was about vaginal mesh. Yes. It was a mock trial and they were seeing who was wrongfully it was like wrongful they fucked her shit up basically like her vaginal mesh was like distraught like it's like all over the body what is vaginal mesh like if you like your uterine lining like if you have some sort of um She got like an implant? Like some reconstruction. Yeah.

They like grotesquely F up. Like you have to get vaginal mesh to like, like to reform and things like to rebuild it. Not you. Not you're putting it down. So everyone was like, I was like full blown like fuck that out. Like give this woman her money. You know like it's her. Why?

So were you making calls on behalf of? No, I was sitting in a room. with like 12 of a jury of my own peers, which like is crazy because I was like, this is jury duty, full blown. Like you couldn't have put a more random group. There was a pregnant woman. There was like a full blown like crack had.

There was like like an older gentleman, like old, old, like 150 something. They look like a tortoise or a ghost. And then like a middle age like mom type that was like probably so weird. and we're like the whole thing was like we get to leave when we come to a consensus

like some people were like no I can't agree it we'd be like nine out of ten people would agree and I was like literally I like blew my lid at some point and I'm in college I'm 19 I'm like literally it doesn't matter like it doesn't matter this is fake

and they came in the room I didn't know they were watching us one way mirror type shit you can't do that I was like okay that makes sense. Yeah. How did it just, it was just like, how did it end up? The woman got her money.

Good, good. Like, hypothetically, though. And I got my money too. It was $800. Two full days, like, of seven and a half hours in this room. My soul was trapped at the bottom of the ocean. Had to eat lunch with these folks. They took our phones the whole day.

Not that I was like really doing anything. I think I still probably had vine. Yeah. It's like I really didn't have anything to do. but still it was just like wow wow wow like the first day was so horrible that I almost thought about you didn't get paid per day you got paid when you finish it I almost thought about not going back this day and my roommates were like you're you're going back wow to pay rent the call center was completely different I've heard of that story so many times but it's crazy that you just failed to mention it was all around vaginal mesh so vaginally it's crazy what what you choose to admit vaginal something like that can never happen again to me. I get that. Oh, I get that.

I got a letter in a mail in a mailbox. It didn't happen to be mine. I missed jury duty again, believe it or not. And this is my final warning. And then you go to jail? And I have to pay a fine. But like I will go to jury duty this time. You could get a fun one.

It's just hard because it's like I always put it off and I schedule it and I'm like, okay, I'll just schedule it in a year and deal with it then. Then I either forget or something comes up. I got out of my last one because I was on the road for work. I was just doing shows somewhere. But I didn't even receive it. It went straight to my lawyer. Yeah, I just keep saying I haven't received it.

Yeah. It's kind of, by the way, the ignorance is bliss thing does not work. I know. Like the, what is it called? like pleading in it like you or wait ignorance yeah like it does not play no it's it should

so weird because I full blown forget all the time about physical mail like I'm like if it's not a package like email it to me I'm all digital like all of my stuff I'm a digital girl living in a digital world try to try to shoot me that in an email try to keep up all right guys we're gonna miss piece so bad so

okay well I'll talk to you in the bonus For sure. All right. And we'll talk to you guys. And we'll talk you tomorrow and the next day and the next day the next day. I'll see you every day this week.

Hey. TMG studios. TV slash BNC for bonus. If you want to come listen to the bonus, we haven't said that in a while. That's true. TeamG studios. tv slash BNC MAP.

For bonus. It should pop up. Okay. Thank you guys. We'll see you at the live shows. If you come. And. West Philadelphia.

We're not going there. We are going to Irvine tomorrow, and then, well, yesterday, and then we're going to be in Sacramento on Saturday. Thank you. See ya. What's the difference between butter and butter made from real California dairy? It's the real California farm families behind it.

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