Brooke and Connor Make A Podcast - Need Wet Towel w/ Tristan Watson

Episode Date: August 22, 2024

SUBSCRIBE TO THE NEW BNC CHANNEL: https://bit.ly/45Pspyl   Ad Free & Bonus Episodes: https://bit.ly/3OZxwpr NEW MERCH: https://shoptmgstudios.com  This week, Brooke and Connor are joined by the one and only Tristan Watson for the first ever Tristan Take Over. They talk about their worst high experiences, favorite fair foods, and love languages. Plus, Brooke and Connor share a tender moment for their 4 year anniversary. Join our Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/groups/5356639204457124/  This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at https://betterhelp.com/bandc and get on your way to being your best self. Get the coverage you need. Check out https://StateFarm.com or try their app because Like a Good Neighbor, State Farm is there. Shop Quince’s high-quality closet essentials at https://Quince.com/bandc for free shipping and 365-day returns. Indulge in hydration this summer with Liquid I.V. Get 20% off your first order of Liquid I.V. when you go to https://liquidiv.com and use code BANDC at checkout. B+C IG: https://www.instagram.com/bncmap/ B+C Twitter: https://twitter.com/bncmap TMG Studios YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/tinymeatgang TMG Studios IG: https://www.instagram.com/realtmgstudios/ TMG Studios Twitter: https://twitter.com/realtmgstudios BROOKE https://www.instagram.com/brookeaverick https://twitter.com/ladyefron https://www.tiktok.com/@ladyefron  CONNOR https://www.instagram.com/fibula/ https://twitter.com/fibulaa https://www.tiktok.com/@fibulaa Hosted by Brooke Averick & Connor Wood, Created by TMG Studios, Brooke Averick & Connor Wood, and Produced by TMG Studios, Brooke Averick & Connor Wood. Chapters: 0:00 Hiiiiii 0:53 Intro 1:12 Haunting People  3:42 Tristan’s Take Over Event 4:38 Confronting Connor 7:20 Beating The Gummies 9:52 Need Wet Towel 12:10 BetterHelp 13:06 Need Wet Towel Moments 16:21 Morning Road Rage 19:48 B&C’s Anniversary!!! 22:50 Fried Carnival Food 25:27 State Farm 26:44 Sketchy Fair Rides 32:28 Revisiting The Abduction Zone 35:00 Winning Carnival Games 37:07 Unethical Clout Chasing 39:15 Going In Silverlake 40:55 Buddy High 44:21 Quince 45:46 Brooke’s New Imprinting 52:10 Love Languages  55:57 Insane Venmo Requests 57:28 Liquid IV 59:23 New Cucumber Trend 1:03:01 Twitter Trends 1:04:37 Tristan x Zach 1:06:58 Poop Facials 1:10:40 Leaving Number For Someone 1:13:38 Thank You Trish! 1:14:02 See You In Bonus!!! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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I love that one. Connor, you never do that one. Do that one. No. Yeah. Hi. The one that Brooke doesn't like, hey. It was a variation.

Brooke, come over here and smell my mic. Yeah, that one. That's the one she doesn't like. That's interesting. And it's weird that you don't like that. It's kind of very. Let me hear you do. Hi.

Hi. Okay. No. Half ass and you know it. Hi, guys. Welcome back to Brooke and Connor make a podcast. We have on someone who words can't describe

Not many Really Yeah There are some that could This is Tristan Watson Pick a few Okay Pick a few to detail

Trish Remarkable Yeah Unique Unique Unique Yeah what would you Like if someone's like

Coming up to you And like Oh I know you're from Tristan And like what would you say Like oh shit He's remarkable And Z Yeah he

He um He lights up a room. I'm gonna cry. That just means that you'll be murdered down the line. Yeah, I mean, that's how people describe you. Yeah, that's, oh God, we were just watching. What?

Can I not talk about that? No, you can, but it's like, do we want to start? Yeah, no, we can't start with a murder. No, we're not going to start with the murder. We could, Trish. I'm sorry to have interrupted. No, it's okay, but we were talking about. We were watching the murder.

Yeah, like I was just having a weird reaction. I'm not, I'm not even following what you guys are saying. I mean, you think we are at any given point in time? Okay, so let's come back. Okay. Okay, so we were watching a murder documentary. And we were just thinking about very, very sad, heart gutting story, but we were just, like, thinking about what they would describe us at, and we were envisioning our friends,

like describing us in these situations. And so it begs the question. It really, like, really begs it. What would people be saying about us? Yeah. And, you know, would you be sobbing, you know? Would you be like out there campaigning for me? I know Brooke would.

I would be at the vigil. Yeah. For justice to find me. Yeah. Yes. Good. Great. Like, of course, one.

I always wonder about who would come out randomly and be like that was one of my best friends. Like probably everyone, unfortunately. A majority. Yeah. But I want to come back and haunt the people that say I'm their best friend when I go missing. Yeah. Unless it's like people that act. No, that's fine.

But if it's like the people. that like I haven't spoken even years and I'm like that was my girl. The people you don't know that and you come back in their room and I'm like do you miss me? Do you miss me best me? I would come back and feel like we weren't even close. Let's cuddle.

Yeah. I want to do like poltergeist on their ceiling. Remember when we used to do this bestie? That would be real pretty. I'm kind of going insane over here. I just want to circle back and make sure we did intro Trish. I said Tristan Watson. He's unique New York. Hi, my love. One of our best friends. You've probably heard

his name so many times on this podcast. It's important that we intro you to Trish and get an episode with Trish up now Because of something that's about to blast your socks off Coming down the line Is that appropriate to say? And that's what we'll say. But you have something to look forward to

In reference to Trishiana. Yeah, it's going to be something that has never been done before And that you are going to really take and consume And love and appreciate and just learn from And so I think it begs my appearance here today. It's more of a takeover over these next few, you know, kind of episodes. Yeah. Tricia Watson, takeover event?

2K, 24. 2K, 24. Now, Connor, why didn't you answer our texts on Saturday night? I was a great question. What could you have possibly been doing? We filmed this special surprise on Friday. You know, God will. And I thought we had all really hit it off.

Really connected. I even got a sweet text from Connor. You know, being like, thank you so much. I was like, I love you, you're welcome, et cetera. That wasn't Friday. That was Saturday. So, yeah, so we had filmed on Friday, and now we're asking you, why didn't you answer our text on Saturday?

Saturday. Great question. Well, Papa took it, like, I didn't leave my house. Or I didn't do anything on Saturday. I went on a hike. You think we did? You think we did? That's not helpful.

Well, then I had one of those little communal gummies on my walk with Max, and I thought it was like two milligrams of marijuana. marijuana, maybe five, ten. So I sat down and I could feel my phone buzzing, but I was just not going to check. I don't. I don't believe you. That's fine. Really?

I have no way to prove it. You don't believe me that I was immobile? I also have FaceTime, too. So that's multiple buzzes. I was aware it was buzzing. I didn't know it was you guys. I fell asleep on my couch. You would have answered?

Well, that begs the question. Why didn't you answer the next morning? It pleads the question. The next morning. It pleads the question. Yeah. follow up, hey, sorry I couldn't get to your text. Oh.

Because I do this thing where if it's, if it happened the day before, it's, it's no longer, it's a moot point. It no longer serves me. It's more of a moot point. Really? It's more of a moot point. Okay. But now all we have to, all we have is is now, you know, and I've been working on that a lot recently. Because someone said, many moons ago, they said, you are not, not.

if you existed only like say that you didn't have a past and you like came to right now you just operate as with what you have now and that's really all we have is now. I don't know if I'm sorry I didn't answer your phone call. I don't know if it's the let me focus that I had just taken

but that didn't make sense to me. Okay let me try it again because I did mess it up. If you like got out of like what are you trying to do the coconut tree? No I don't get a crap about the coconut tree. Okay. Okay. So what are you trying to concur?

I'm saying if you didn't have a past... Let's know what you're trying to postulate. You would only exist in the present and what you have now. I'm not trying to sound like Amelaharis. No, I'm not trying to sound like Amelaharis. No, I'm not trying to sound like Omelahara. No, there's a guy that I follow on to TikTok that takes, that takes like shrooms before he goes on runs and then...

Is that what you're trying to do with your Camino? No, I was just trying to have, like, relaxing you. There is a girl she runs. She does the runs to like see if she can beat the gummy. Like see if she can beat the gummy hitting. Yeah, I love trying to beat the gummy. And that's really fun. I don't ever do that.

I just kind of like to sit there and wait for it to kind of just overtake, which is not great because it'll hit me like a freight train. Trish, you don't take gummies. If I'm saying like if I do like a can or something and I just sit in those little can. I've been trying to get Trish on the can. Yeah, because I've experimented in like the smokable element pieces just because I like that in other factors. but not weed. I don't think it really works well. I don't think we've told people about need wet towel.

We have not discussed need wet towel. I'm open to speaking on it. Let us know about need wet towel. So I don't even know what need wet towel. I don't know what you guys are saying. That's scary. You don't know need wet towel. Do you have the imagery to pull up as I explained?

So she's going to pull up the evidentiary support here for us. When I'm able to smoke that good good, if you will, I don't do that often. I do like a ape. I'm in a sense early just cause. I do like a vape, but I don't really smoke weed a lot. Okay. And when I do,

sometimes it's either really, really, really good or sometimes it's a poor, poor experience. Yeah, I relate to that. I align with you there. Well, that's why I'm interested in the gummies. I'm just scared to try them because once it's too late, it's too late. I know.

I know. But I have found specific ones that serve me in a way and spark joy in my life. wish you would share. There's a Camino one in a little tin can. That's cute. And I took a different one the other night. But there's a little green one and it has CBD

in it too. And I don't even know if CBD's real. I really never got an answer there from anyone. Except for dogs. Like I know it works for dogs. Does Max do it? Or does he prefer it like a joint? I give Max or a blunt. A joint or a blunt. I don't like to say what I give Max because

it's always wrong. I can never win. No. Like everyone's coming at my, my jugs because I gave him a, like, a rib bone. Because we always gave my dog growing up rib bones. That makes sense to me. And he didn't die from a rib bone. He got hit by a school bus. No, he did.

Yeah, like, he really did. Sometimes it's, sometimes it's what you don't expect is going to kill your dog. Kills it. Just to clarify, Max has not been hit by the school bus. Max is alive and well. Yeah. That would break me. Truly.

No, let's not even say anything remotely. adjacent to that. Anyway, need what towel? So, we were in Palm Springs for our Fourth of July trip that we did twice, which I do miss. I wish we would have done it this year. However, I had this little like pin situation. Pendulum is what the young people call it.

Pendgment. Pendium. C-SR. Sorry, it was science all in my brain. God, sorry, scientist. I had a... Pendulum. I had had a pendulum, aka Benjamin. You also were doing.

two bottles of red too. Okay. And in the heat of the summertime. I was sweating and working like a dog in the heat of the summertime. And I was actually bragging about like to, I forget who I was bragging about. Everyone. Yeah, a lot. I was like, no, I have never been good at smoking weed, but like I finally found something that can really, really help me and really like, I can do it. And it's fun. And I feel like I'm like, you know, with all the girls who are also like laughing and giggling. So I was doing this, but I had never experienced it in Palm Springs in about 110 to 117. 79,000 degrees Fahrenheit. While the hot tubs blasting after two bottles of red.

Hot tubs blasting two bottles of red. And I'm like, I feel great. Took one additional hit. It was a longer puff that I'm comfortable with. Yeah. So it was a longer puff that I'm comfortable with. And then I ended up like hospitalizing myself in internally in the house. I didn't actually go to the hospital.

But I had ended up in the restroom, shower floor and then had to submerge myself with water for like what seemed like 10 to 12 years. and then I had to get into the bed and I was just green in the face. I mean there's nothing like seeing someone take that hit. You know, when like you see it and then every like ounce of color drains from their face and I just saw him stand up and calmly escort himself into the home venue.

And you know if Tristan's not saying anything then it's like doomsday? He had done it pretty quietly too. Like I don't think anyone realized and then I had let myself back into the home venue. you to check on him. Bathroom floor. Yeah.

Complete like no color. So we had. It was so cold. The bathroom floor was. That's a really great feeling that not a lot of people talk about just laying on that floor. No. He was and he was also upchucking. He was doing the uptucks.

I was so sad. He had to be upchucks. It was probably a little of everything. Randomly I'd probably mix too many potions. Like there was too many things in order for me to kind of get down. So I wouldn't recommend that. And so that halted my weed experience for a while. So I've recently been divulging back into the weekends.

This is started with. Oh, shit. Oh, shit. Oh, horrible. So then I was able to get Tristan prop him back on the bed from the bathroom floor and then get a cold compress to put on his forehead. Because that's. Sorry. That helps me.

So here's this is Trish's contact photo of the cold compress. Need wet towel. On forehead. And then ever since that moment, like if he, I think a few times after. After that, you had smoked. And then I would just receive a text, need wet towel, period. And that's when you know, like, he's come down with a case of. I've done, what was our other one that would we?

The case of the you know what? Oh, green hornetting. It used to be green horneting when you had done too much. Right. And then now it's need wet towel. Now it's need wet towel. I get the wet towel thing. Yeah.

I know that's the only thing that can help. I had to do that recently with an ice cube. You needed a wet ice cube? Tell us more about that. The one on the caps on TikTok. talk that you can put on your head? Yeah, I hope those those are a scam.

I feel like you would have one of those or someone would send you one. I want one. Cat Wellington uses it a lot. It's like a cold compress. It's like a condom for your head, but you keep in the freezer. It's like hangovers or headaches.

Divine. Yeah. It sounds like it would be, but everyone's like it gives you a headache because it's so cold and it's so tight. That's tough, isn't it? My parents had this couch growing up. It's one of these doohicies.

That sounds garbage. I'd like one. Brooke, I believe you would just wear that every single day. I know. I really like that a lot. You'd start wearing

that end of the podcast. I really like it. It looks like skims. It could be skimms. When did you have to do your experience with the cold compress? Oh.

Yeah, why did you need an ice cube? Well, when I go on runs and stuff and I have a can like an hour before and now we are sounding like we do this constantly. We're trying to beat the can.

The only time I'm trying to beat the can really is when I want it to align when I'm having food delivered so that the food I can taste all the ingredients powerful but I go on runs on the can and you were off the can I was off my rocker you were on a run off of the can come on now that ain't accurate but I instead of instead of doing that I hit Tate's penjamin and we're working out in the garage and I'm I get to the up part of lifting as lifting on the bench I get to the

up part cannot for the life me to figure out how to get them down and I'm laying on the bench and I'm like they're not even heavy I can feel that they're they have weight on them I'm bench pressing if this is not clear for reference so you I'm up here I'm laying down and I cannot I'm like oh my God like my arms are locked I cannot and you had support via Tate no like I was just he was doing his own thing I'm like this I had to go like this sideways I had to put them down sideways that's scary and then I said oh I was thinking Need wet, need wet towel.

You need to be careful. They were loose weights. Yeah. Do you guys want to hear about what happened to me this morning? Yes. I'd enjoy it. So, I got a lift. Cars outside.

It's in my alleyway of my house. I'm familiar. I come outside. All I did before the car got there, hey, I'm here. Sent the message. Be right there. Pored that cup of coffee right in front of me.

Yeah. And I walk out and I see the car. It's like one house too far from me. He's pissed? No, totally fine. And I get a little. in the car and as I'm shutting the door

my neighbor is in her garage like getting in her car really quickly and starts the back up and she honks like lays on her horn and I'm like shutting the door when she honked and then I was like oh she must have done that on accident or she's like trying to get someone else out of the house then she honks again and then my

Uber driver honks back and she gets out of the car and goes I'm trying to take my fucking kids to school and he goes I don't give a fuck what you're doing bitch you know your neighbor No, but it is 8.17 a.m. They're at each other's...

Like, he said stuff I can't say on the podcast. Whoa. Yeah. 1817? I'm trying to take my kids to school. I don't give a... So were you? Then, we pull off...

At this point, we're starting the ride. There's no like, oh, I'm gonna get a new car. He pulls off and goes, man, fuck that bitch. And I was like, yeah, we're one house away from... That is my direct. direct neighbor. I was like this trying not to for her not to see me. I've had some interesting experience.

Oh, Trish, Trish. Not even close to Don. I feel horrible. I feel terrible. You don't think I felt. You guys are going to love the end of this. He goes, she picked the wrong one today. That's why I carry. No. Yay.

We are, we are, we are. Thank God. We are 40 seconds into my ride. Driver has a gun. and she said he goes she's trying to get this is a woman who looked like she would be on the modern family cast big dick frame glasses like very in what family one of them which one Connor I can't decide a combo of all of them really she's a floater and he goes she's trying to get flatlined all flatliner I go oh my god okay oh my god oh my god and then I have to be like hell yeah man I would do this same thing like I said I gotta be safe did you have to no I mean you don't have to kill the woman taking her kids to school right um I think that that might be like let's just you know drive away because I need to go I think we all need to go oh you had to take your kids to school too in many ways

yeah I needed to to go it was horrible and all my neighbors were like outside like going to work too wow what a start to the morning I and then my coffee I was so scared it was going to to spill. Look how much is spilled all over that lid. I was so scared that, like, if I got a drop in this man's car seat, I'd be pointing Jesus.

You sure would. Well, we're glad you got here in one piece. Thanks. You really are glad to see you. Did he give you a gun as, like, a door prize or anything? Yes, he gave me. Doorbuster? Is it on your person right now? So just to know he is, his glock is, um. right now. Conner's packing. Oh my god,

Connor, speaking of packing. Yeah. Happy anniversary. Anniversary. Of what? Of me and you. What do you mean? We met four years ago today. You're lying. No. Oh my God. Four years ago today. It's our four year anniversary today. That's crazy. Isn't that insane? No, no, no. You know why this is so beautiful? Actually involves you, Trish. Because I'm thinking about Conner's early TikToks back in the day when

we first met and Tristan was actually before anyone had even met Tristan yet in the comments. I knew you had something up your sleeve. You always. Begging to take Connor out for a cup of coffee. And you were responding. Oh, Trish. We were connecting even before we connected. And I think that's what makes it so special.

This is like genuinely I did not know that. Yes, you did. I feel like you must have. There was one point where I was like stalking your old. old videos for some reason. This was like a few years ago and I had met Tristan at this point and I was like, did Tristan and Connor know each other in early 2020? Turns out they actually did not know each other.

We did not know each other. Tristan was just sliding in. I was just, yeah, I was doing like thirst comments, unfortunately right now. I mean, not for, I mean, you know, like love you to God damn death. Like I'm happy that I did them. And then I think it turned into something really powerful. And you were responsive. You were planting seeds that I didn't know I was watering.

Yeah. And you were, you were water. your cup was running over. Runneth over. It was overflowing. And for me, a little old boy at the time I was living in Atlanta. The little boy that I had been at that time. Born at a young age, like over, you know, in Alabama, then moved to Atlanta.

And I was just there commenting on, you know, Fibula, Connor W's, you know, content yours as well. I even used one of yours audios before we knew each other. So funny to me. Which is really crazy. There's so many invisible strings all throughout there. Isn't that crazy? But so your anniversary is actually even before me in Connors. Which is crazy.

Yeah. That's crazy. Yeah. You haven't sent me anything. So definitely looking forward to seeing what you get foamy. And you haven't even complimented my camouflage blouse today. Well, I haven't had a goddamn second to speak. In the color camo.

Take about five to ten minutes. We'll be quiet. Think of all the nice things you can say about us to for our respective anniversaries. I'll let you do Tristan first. Well, I'll let you do Brooke first because it is all's true anniversary. Well, you know, yours had happened before ours. So I don't want to take away from that. I'm going to write this all down on a card.

Okay. I don't want to take up any more time. Really? Yeah, thinking, because I would have to think and think and talk. It wouldn't come naturally to you. Now would it? No, nothing comes natural to me. It's all choreographed.

Go figure. Everything okay? You seem to be itching. It's a scab. What is this? What are we doing? So I... It seems like Brooke has some stuff in the back that she's bringing out now.

She is. She's pulling it out. She's pulling it like... She's pulling it like... She's pulling her... Like a magician. Okay So I went to the fair last night

You guys went to the fair You guys went to the fair on Friday Mm-hmm No When was that? Wait, you did go on Friday Thursday Wednesday

It's an honest mistake Wednesday We had actually gone to the fair On Wednesday It's a completely different day I need to like gather myself Are we throwing you off? A little bit

Didn't think so Okay Do you have Do you need a tissue? No, I'm just doing nervous sticks. Don't be nervous. Nervous sticks, finger up the entire nose. I'm just doing a nervous take.

Goddard's probably wondering what he commented back for me years ago. No, I was wondering how the fair was for you guys, the OC Fair, the Orange County Fair grounds. We had a blast. We really did have a great time. Yeah. The food was interesting. How so? It was just like things that were fried that I didn't like think that it would be your first instinct to fry.

I love the fried chicken, but it's fried in fruity pebbles. Right. It's just like things like that. And there was like fried frog legs on top of an Oreo that had shocked me. Yeah. I got a pulled pork sandwich. That's a safe bat. Yeah.

I just got the chicken fingers. The one that. And a fried twinkie. The crispy cream in between and then you got the fried chicken and then a piece of American cheese, of course. And then you have the additional crispy cream donut. And it's a. sandwich was jarring to me.

It looked great. I just wasn't in the mood for a heart attack like that day, unfortunately. So I didn't opt in for that experience, but it looked, you know, fun. Now, the one that had jarred me was the buffalo chicken in a cone. That was. You love that. I don't. I didn't want that.

Buffalo chicken and a cone? I don't like buffalo. You know, it's chicken. No, I'm familiar with the chicken of it all. I don't like buffalo sauce. Oh. Yeah. I don't think I knew that about you.

Maybe I did. Neither. That's like one of those things where you gotta like... Just pretend. Put your boots on and saddle up. I don't like it. And you need to eat the buffalo. With a ranch.

With a ranch. Just trying with ranch. Do you like wings? Mm-hmm. But plain. Plain? Chicken nugget? Just chicken.

Yeah. Or I like like barbecue wings or like terriaki. The only kind of sauce I like is sweet sauce. Sweet sauce. So I love ketchup because there's a sweetness to it. Yeah. But like I don't like mustard. I don't like mustard.

But I and I love terriaki. And I don't even. I don't really like soy sauce. They're just like eel sauce. There's a sweetness to it. I get you there. Well, I went last night and it was the first time ever where I got scared and I think it's the same as my playing thing.

No. Yeah. Your centripetal forces knocked all over on its side. What was so weird was I was like sitting there and I was like, okay. Like these people that are like the people that work at the fair, like it's not their career. They're literally like, it's like a 16 year old. No, it's like I'm just here for the summer.

I don't, I'm not, I didn't build this machine. It's just screws holding me together as I fly at the speed of light through the air in every direction, spinning, circling, jumping, crazy stuff. And then I was thinking about every time something breaks at the fair. Everyone's like, what? Like, it makes total sense that people get stuck upside down all the time. It makes total sense. These machines,

I became like fully scared last night I was grabbing onto the chair from behind because he latched me in but when he latched me and all he did was kind of like he goes okay you're getting I was like am I good you didn't follow a protocol I don't know that's the thing like who's trained there's so many lives at stake I don't know

maybe I'm being like a baby about this whole thing but the fair is scared The fair is scary, especially because it's just like, you put it all there, set it up, let it go, and then you take it all down. Like, it's not like six flags where it's like, it's always there, you know? Yeah, that's the word. Yeah. Well, and they bring it on, like, down the highway. It's portable.

I have a question. Now, we may have to cut this. Yeah. Is Carney a slur? Like short for carnival? No, like, that's that carny over there. person that Carney scammed me.

I've never heard of I don't know. I mean, I was going to say this, but I was internally thinking as well, your hat was giving Carney. My hat is giving Carney? Yeah,

like you work at a carnival. Is that what that means? Okay. I don't want it to, I don't want it to, I don't know about it. I don't want to be canceled by the Carney community today.

To be honest, we had such a good time. That's a person who goes to a carnival is a carny. No, someone that works at the carnival. I don't. To be fair, we had like such a great time at the event venue of the carnival.

I agree. Yeah. And the food was great. The rides were great. The animals were just to die for. Yes. It was an interesting sight, those animals. I didn't realize that pigs came in that size. It's not? I think you're fine. Did you see the food? Huh? No, Carney is not a slur. I've never heard it. You've never heard the Carnies? I've only heard of Carney because once a few years ago, I didn't add for Chipotle when they came out with Carnay Asada.

And I kept saying Carney isada. And they were like, okay, so that was my first take. I did Carney Asada and then they had me do 14 more because I had pronounced Carni Asada, Karni Asada. And then it turned out after all those hours of doing more, they had just went with the original Carney. It's great news. So if you scroll back about 16 years on my TikTok, there's an ad of me promoting the new Karni Asada. It's made out of people that work out of there. They ended up liking that version the best.

That's great news. Brooke opted out of a majority of the rides at the fair. Yeah. Me and Channing and, well, sody as well. We were kind of like the, we tried as many rides as we could. Brookwood opted in for the game experience. I did the pirate ship. I love the pirate ship ride.

That was gorgeous. That was going to throw up if we had gone one more. In additional. If we had gone one more swing, I was going to whack. If we were strapped in, again, to your point of being like, am I good? Like, no one really checked on us. It also said no talking while on the ride, and I don't know what, like, so you're going and just not strap us in and then we can't talk.

I did not see that, Tristan. There was like six signs that said, like, no talking on the ride. Like, so if I'm, if we're going down, like, I can't even scream and just have to lightly be like. What would the reason for that be? I'm not sure. Didn't say I couldn't sing. Oh my God. Did you see the girl sobbing on the pirate ship?

Was it you? I wasn't. It was so. It broke my heart. There was this little girl with her dad. And she was just like buried in her dad And her dad was like, are you okay? Are you okay?

And she was like, yeah, I'm okay. I'm okay. And she was obviously like couldn't be further from okay. She was hysterically stopping but like tried to keep the smile on her face. Like was like she was like getting embarrassed that she was getting so worked up and sad and flustered. And like at the end she clearly she was like in hysterics. And he was like, are you okay? And she was like, yeah, I loved it.

Wait, wait. And it was so sad. What point of the ship was she on? She was in the front like. across from us. Yeah, I didn't see it. Yeah, yeah. It was like it broke my heart

because she so clearly wanted to be like such a big kid and like enjoy the ride but she was very miserable clearly and it was just just broke my heart. It really broke my heart. I didn't see her. I hope she's well though.

I do too. I think she is. But that through like the ship like when it went all the way back like I was fully standing up at a 90 degree angle which couldn't have been what got intended. Not strapped in. No, I wasn't strapped in. Great point.

But if we went even just a little bit, further back I would have been tipped over forward through and through. Your booty would have been. My booty would have been up and out and I would have fallen cascaded down the ship. Catapulted as well. Down the ship and lost. Did you experience the pirate ship? I treading in the lawn and it was too long.

It was the last day of fair last night, so that's why we went. Really? Yeah. Did you go on to the abduction zone? I went on the abduction zone. Did you get sucked off? It doesn't have the same. Jeunet-se-cois when you're not blackout drunk, I have to say.

Oh, I didn't realize when you had been sucked off the last time you were blackout. I got sucked off on the abductions. He had gotten sucked off by the abductions in. Okay, last year. So there's a difference. Okay. Yeah. I went on and I was like, oh, my head hurts like that.

It smelled like vomit in there. Really? It was hot. It's random. It smelled like vomit. That's the one that sucks you too. It was weird, like being stuck like, I'm over it. Like I couldn't.

Can't do anything. I couldn't move in my feet. face is getting peeled back like this and I'm like oh my god what the longer do we have but I did go on it so I didn't get to go on it and then we had talked about it but I didn't end up getting to go on the grab I call it the gravitron there is a gravitron and there's an abduction zone the abduction zone is further away it's over by the zipper we were there are they ship was are they like sisters um their chosen family I would say they're not twins you get sucked off on both I'd say it's

Sucking off is pretty exclusive to the abduction zone. Were you sucked off at all last night? Not really. No, I was blue-bold. Sorry to hear that. Are you okay? The craziest thing... I played this one game.

Shut up. Sorry, I sound like the aliens in the abduction zone. Move forward. Go ahead. Thank you. I've just spit Go ahead No like what I'm gonna say next

It's like so stupid It's stupid now that All that all that has gone down What happened? Go ahead No I'm just Just shocked that so many people I'm out of can

Does this is what you sound like off the can Okay go ahead No I'm not even saying No sorry I'm really It's so not important I'm ready for it Okay, what I was going to say, we're going to get canceled.

We're going to get canceled for being. We're the alien abductions. They're going to cut that part, and they're going to say, this is why we stopped giving white men microphones. I agree. No, I was just shocked looking around at how many people had stuffed animals,

and it's so hard to... That's the point of the fair, Connor. No, I'm saying those animals that you get at the fair, When you touch them, you're like, oh, this would catch on fire if it was near anything. They did it feel so flammable? Sure. And they're probably, the biggest animal at the fair, that's probably, it's bigger than you. Pikachu?

Just an animal, whatever. Probably costs, probably costs a dollar to make. The fair probably makes so much money. I got $100 in tickets. Oh, you're rich. Yeah, we only opted for the four. $40 packet or $32 I got the $20.

Oh, I got the $32. Well, I got the 40 tickets, but then I went on two rides and those were gone. And then I needed to play this game because this freaking kid would not leave the water spitter game. Oh, I love the water spitter game.

And he was sitting at this one chair that was winning every single time. And I was like, Carney, Asada, this game is rigged and he has not moved from seat 14. And I need him to move because how was he winning every single time, you know?

Right. No, it wasn't talent. His seat was rig. It could have been. It wasn't talent because I kept my eye on him. The game that I didn't play, I'm not going to get into it because it's making me a little bit. Did you get his chair? No.

But I used 40 tickets on that water spitter game and I didn't win one Charmander. You know that's illegal at a casino? To pocket watch. For like what you were doing would be illegal at a casino. Ligo at a casino. You actually could have been arrested because that's illegal in a casino. It is. To wait and watch out someone's machine.

This might not be true. I hate going to the casino for that point. I mean, I love going. But the people, when you start winning, they just like sit behind you. And I'm afraid, like, I mean, at any point, I could win like $6 and then they're like coming to like stormy out. They're coming to suck you off.

God willing. What they want, they're like the people who say they're your best friends when you die. they're like like we actually he actually we actually used to comment on his TikToks a long time ago called those cloud chasing and that's not ethical cloud chasing no it's we call that non ethical cloud chasing once you see something going really well for somebody

and then you jump in there not cool it is interesting when you do have because there's when people that I've like liked and I've like comments on like like like like or like even just like I think are funny but sometimes it would like appear as if you're cloud chasing but like you would have never know about them had they not had their, you know, resurgent.

So I don't want it to look like I'm cloud chasing. I want it to look like, oh, hey, I'm like, you know, if you're commenting. I'm genuinely happy for you. Yeah, I'm genuinely happy for you. And I also, like, enjoy your content and, like, also you as well, you know. Yeah. But I always think about that. Like, if I'm ever commenting on some people's things, I never want it to be like,

hey, like, I'm, you know, running on that clout. I'm just kind of like, oh, this is cool. You know that one tweet that's like, Drake, I'm so drunk. Drake. I don't think so. There's a sweet that's fair. You know, Izzy? Mm-mm.

Oh, my God. It's happening. It's happening. Like, shit, it just happened. Here we go. Let us know. This is not it. Really?

Little baby dick, too good. Okay. That's not what I was talking about. Are you short on her? Drake, so this person tweeted and it was just like, Drake at Drake I'm so drunk Drake please and I sometimes will have like a couple cocktails and I will DM you know like a chaplain around and be like I'm really proud of you all the time nice yeah I did that thing I did that as well and who's the most recent person you've done that too

I did that to role model the other day oh I mean I told you bad Addison Ray I said song's really good oh yeah Trish do you want to manifest an opportunity with role model on this space oh that's a good idea Kind of. I mean, really anyone in this space who may be able and willing. No, but I mean, I'm very fond of role model and I met him the other night and we have some mutuals, you know, that work in the industry, et cetera. And he was just lovely and gorgeous. And I hope he shared the, you know, the similar experience that I did. I ran into him at 4100, the bar, which like going out in Silver Lake is really crazy because that's like kind of where everyone is like that, you know, you see online. Like, you'll just be like, you know, you'll just be like, you know, walking to the bar to get a drink or like standing up and then you'll run into like m c chamberl or you know roll m or you know renna r it's just kind of really crazy to just run into these people irl and like you'd think you'd have to be in like the the grits and the glam of hollywood etc right grits glam of course or but you know it's right over there in silver lake yeah it's really pretty so i'm just i just want to you know this space has special manifestation power so i just want to take a minute to manifest a collaboration

between you and roll m i know that would mean a lot to you it would mean the world to me role m if you're seeing this you know be i think we should collab sometime you know in any capacity that you're willing and able to yeah you know whether that's delivering me wet towel um whether that's you know Drake i'm so drunk you know either way it could be you know doing something in the abduction zone too any anything that is available to you if possible would be helpful i think so yeah if you See something, say something. Yeah. We've always said that and stood by that.

It's a compound. Yeah. Thank you. Yeah. I had a dream last night that I ate a worm, like a live earthworm. Ugh. And it's one of those things you can't shake. Ooh.

That just gave me the shivers. And it was like to impress people too. No, really? Yeah. What was that movie when we were kids where they ate the worm? Sandlot, the sandlot? The sandlot. I saw it in theaters.

So I don't think it was the sandlot. it was like a really niche it's this no somewhat a kid ate a worm I'm just thinking of the ice cream fried worm how do you eat fried worm and they made a whole movie

yeah the whole movie I'm thinking of the hot dog competition one I don't know why what hot dog competition you know the Disney movie where they like have a competition to make hot dogs but they really play another sport do you guys know what I'm talking about I don't think I've seen that one Tristan

this has been like truly it's like we have hot box this studio I'm not kidding I think the lemmy chills are THC infused. I don't want to get sued by Lemmy Chill but I do feel like I had an edible. I had my chicken sausage.

And you had the chicken sausage. And you had the chicken sausage. I don't know why I'm laughing like that. I guess that's why I laugh. It seems like I'm high. I'm not high. I know. I'm feeling it's like buddy high.

Like one person's high and you're high by proxy even though you didn't smoke except for none of us smoked. except for me off of my let me chill The only thing let me chill is Ashwaganda And B12, Connor That's energy Aschwanda

Aschua gonda Give me a kiss Aschia, I'll Aschia Uganda give me a kiss Are you just gonna look at me funny Back in the day you used to get confused Between Aschwaganda and ayahuasca Yeah

So you would say that you had just taken ayahuasca I was telling people With a straight face yeah I take ayahuasca about five times a week Is Oswaldixt? I'm off the ayahuasca There were people like On a health journey and I was like

Yeah I swear ayahuasca My mom gave me these ayahuasca supplements And it has changed my life, I think Yeah And I think there are people out there that Thought I am Off my rock Off kilter

Yeah off kilter would work as well. The ayahuasca too. Because they thought I was taking ayahuasca five times work. I want to do ayahuasca, but I can't because it makes you throw up. Baby's kicking.

Just for the first day. Yeah, I don't want to throw up at any of the days. Well, you have to have the purge. I know, I don't want to. That's what I'm saying. My friend actually went and did it in Peru, like a proper ayahuasca thing. Uh-huh.

The way it's described genuinely feels like you are in a prisoner of, war camp. I was going to say it really does seem life-changing from what I've experienced what? Did your stomach make a sound? My stomach is making such weird sounds that I'm just sitting here and I'm not trying

to let y'all talk. From the sausage? I think so. And so I'm just going to sit here for a second and let y'all do this and let this. Let it pie. Luckily as hard as we've tried to get our stomach trawling on the mic to pick up, it never picks up. It never picks up. Yeah, you don't worry about it. It's too much to ignore. Yeah, we all we always growl at each other.

they're like wow okay let me tell you about my waiter oh i'd like that you want to hear about my waiter i guess this starts like a month ago the story really starts about a month ago or a month and a half ago um my mom came to visit um with her new special friend in town so i had uh we had uh we had to go out to dinner we had to go out to dinner and i was just struggling just because of the nature of the of the of the event and the opportunity that was presented to me at that time. So why are you laughing? Tristan's giving himself the giggle. The giggle bars.

Yeah. So I was struggling just due to the nature of the opportunity. And we went to this place, a local joint, if you will, local venue. And right off the bat, the waiter had come up and it was game over for me. It was an immediate imprint. If you're familiar with that term, that's what happens in Breaking Dawn when Jacob imprints on Rinesme.

It's just kind of like the invisible string all of a sudden that's been there all along. Or a kitten. Snap into place, okay, with me and this waiter. Suddenly took an opportunity that I had been struggling with and made it an opportunity that really aligned with my values. And so...

The wonder was hot? Can you just... Okay. I'm confused. Did waiter have dead tooth? Why you're a twoprat? He was like, and this doesn't, this literally doesn't happen to me.

Like, it usually takes me, like, more than just, like, a pretty face to be like, I'm completely in love with you. Like, that's why, no, no, no, no, no, listen. I don't know. Because that's why I'm in love with, like, actors. It's like, because the character makes me fall in love. I don't know.

Like, I'm never in love just with, like, a photo of someone. It's like, I need to see them embody a character or, like, do an interview or something. I feel like, we've, we've been in multiple, of situations where we you know someone turns a corner and we just fall to the ground no it's not like the imprint that happened with me in the waiter okay yeah completely lifelong imprint looks a little bit think jonathan groff a little taller though tattoos differ a little bit different looking than jonathan too would you say uh he is different but i would say jonathan adjacent jonathan adjacent how does tristan

know this because we went back to the venue two nights ago because i have not gotten this waiter out of my head and it's been over a month it's been a while and we thought he was not there we thought he wasn't there I was devastated we were sitting at the bar we couldn't quite get a table he rounds the corner my heart

dropped to my crack felt like it was going to fall out onto the floor of the bar Tristan tell everyone about the waiter Burke had a very special experience No to just tell them about what he looks like and stuff because I can't really

Picture him. Well, I mean, he just like, he, so he gets so worked up. And, you know, he's like, he's really doing a great job at his job. And he's just. He's so good at his job. So great at his job. And we've always said that. He's the first time I'd met him, but I've always said that about him and known that about him.

But he's, you know, running his hair. Yeah. Yeah, his hands through his hair. And then he's also, you know, like getting like a drink of water in because he's exhausted. You know, make sure you're hydrated, like hydrated. And, you know, it was really something to see. But, yeah. So watch some.

Drink water? No, no, no, no. To watch someone do what they love and are good at is very attractive. I did, we didn't speak with him, but Brooke shared a nice interaction with him where was he in the middle of doing that? Drinking water? Yeah. I think he had just finished. He had just finished drinking his water.

And if you know, you know, like it's cute. I actually smiled at him from across the bar. Oh. And what did he do? mile back. And then I broke the eye contact. Then get this, the story's not even close to you done. Yesterday.

Can you believe it? It pulls out of God. No. Yesterday, this is the day after that we had seen him. I was doing interviews for Tinder. And I was just interviewing people about dating and whatever. And just, you know, based off of my experience with dating, like I had brought up the waiter about 18 times during the interviews as people spoke about like their relationship

experience. I had kept coming back to the waiter. And then we turned the cameras off and the girl goes, wait, by any chance is this waiter from her active names? She names the name of the restaurant. I go, you are literally you're kidding me right now. You're freaking kidding. You're freaking kidding me right now.

They just freaking left. They are also addicted to this exact waiter, which made me upset, honestly, because I had thought that it was kind of like a one-on-one I imprinted exclusively. I didn't realize other people were imprinting too, which it upset me just because I thought it was more of a unique, like, invisible string, like

meant to be kind of thing. But it turns out it's actually happening to a lot of women. And men around the globe. You should post him in that, are we dating the same guy? Facebook group. So I am going to, my friend is coming to visit this weekend. We are going to head back to the menu. I'll head there. Yeah. So we will all

just head back to the menu. Is the food good? It's really good. Yes. It's incredible. And it's not weird for me to keep going either because it's like we wherever you have to tell yourself that's where we were texting you from like a local spot oh okay you guys had some cocktails yeah we had had a few moments really and he just hit 2k on youtube so we had gotten her a bottle of champagne we were off the beseco and he ended up pouring about like two and a half to three bottles in there was not not he the waiter because he was busy in his section but he the bartender he him the bartender we him bartender we him bartender we

us had them. The bartender rescued us well though too. It's my mom's birthday. Oh my God, keep going. Sorry. I was like, August 19th, August 19th. Why do I know August 19th?

It's my mom's birthday. Hey, and you know what? When we met on our anniversary, it was your mom's birthday then and you had forgotten then too. Did you send her something? What do you mean? Like, did you send her a gift?

No, but I'm going to see her this week. Oh, that's good. You need a hand deliver a gift. Yeah. What will you get her? What's your love language? My parents, every time I get them a present, what's my mom's love,

physical touch? Should I cuddle her? That'd be cute. For my gift? She might really like that. I can't. I would not. Actually, no, she wouldn't.

We don't touch in our family. Well, what's your physical? First of all, what's your favorite physical act? And then what's your love language? Are you supposed to know that? Does everybody know that? Yeah. Your love language?

You take an online test? No, you should know that. Like your love language, what you like doing for other people and what you like getting from other people. When I lose that love language thing, where you lose me is when someone's like, I just love receiving gifts. It's like, okay. Many do. Many should and do. I don't.

I love giving gifts. You don't like getting gifts. No, I do like getting gifts. But then I always feel bad because I'm a bad gift giver. So yeah, I do like getting gifts, I guess. When people are like, I love getting gifts and your love, which can be fulfilled via Amazon.com.

You know, like, you can get a package every single day and, like, you know. I love that. I love, I love opening a little package. What do you like to do for others? I like getting gifts. Okay. No, no, no, no, that wasn't my question. I mean, getting gifts for people.

Oh, okay. So you're giving gifts. I like giving, yeah. Yeah. Gifts. And I, like, I love Christmas, and I'm always on Christmas like this. Like, I get someone, something,

and I'm like, the mom and Christmas morning get that one on the road no open that one next we get that one open that one first what's the best gift that you've ever gotten and the best gift that you've ever given someone else gotten what's the best gift I've ever gotten yeah I don't know I guess I'm just

not that kind of materialistic I'm not materialistic you would never be what's the best gift I've ever given what I was going to say about giving gifts to my parents is like I will have the best idea ever and then they always and I say always I mean with my chest always 100% return it really actually yeah but let's be the longest message or call me and be like hey that was so thoughtful of you blah blah blah blah blah I I would hate for you to spend as much money and me not like

need it or like love it or whatever I just got my dad this like indoor he just got surgery on his foot so he can't like go play tennis or golf or anything so I got him this like indoor golf simulator mat screen thing and he's like cannot accept this there's a golf course in our neighborhood I cannot not leave our house that is thoughtful though I know but then I'm like cool well then I'm mad you know now I'm like okay I'm not getting you a gift right I got him I got him these shoes actually that you're wearing Tristan oh I think I love those yeah well he was like can you just get me these shoes and I was like that kind of takes all the fun out of getting someone a gift See, I would rather someone tell me exactly what they want.

Tell me what is best for you. At that point, I should just send you cash. Yeah, that's fine too. I'm okay. Cash is like not a gift. Cash is not a gift. Just whenever. You don't get cash from like a friend.

You get from like your grandparents. Yeah, I feel like when they run out of stuff to give you. I enjoy cash or checks too. Venmo. Venmo works. Cash app as well. Memo works. Even Zelle.

Yeah, I like Zelle. You wouldn't send your grandma. 50 bucks for Christmas. Yeah, but she could send me. I know, I'm talking about giving gifts, guys. You have turned it back to getting gifts. Don't make us the monsters here. God forbid I get a little treat here and there.

People have been, actually, I don't even want to say it because, like, I don't want to raise attention to it. No, go ahead. It's crazy. Requesting me on memo, and, like, I'm saying this, like, don't do this. I don't enjoy it. Like, thousands of dollars to be like, please, it would mean a lot. Like, it would change my life.

And I'm getting tons of Vemner requests for, like, the $1,000, $2,000, like $50. It really can't hurt to ask, though. The worst they could say is no. I got one for $1,500. I have a normal like nine to five job. And I was like, whoa. I would love the $1,500.

And if I can help you, I would love to help you. But unfortunately, like, I need to help me right now. Right. I can't, but it's like, I can't afford to just give $1,000 to anyone, let alone someone that I actually do not know. So. What if? though you just did it.

That doesn't work for my schedule. You can't right now. I wish you guys could see my hand from the angle that I'm looking at it with my four fingers. I want to take a picture and show you guys. Keep talking. Okay. Hey man, what's up? It's all good, dude.

Not a problem. Anything? Not a problem in the slide. It's not a problem at all. Thank you for sharing, Connor. That's what Trish and I were doing that in the car, actually. Oh, so there's four. Yeah.

We actually were. We were, yeah. Show me that. Good. Hang on, Grace. Give me a little bit of the. Give me some sugar. It's not working.

I'm sorry. What else do you think we can get into? Well, we haven't touched, we haven't even touched our tips into pop culture today. Okay, you want to touch some tips? Yeah. I'm done. Touch him out. Tell me where to go and I'll go.

Oh my gosh, wait. So that kid that's making all those cucumber. salads on TikTok. Yeah. I'm obsessed. You're obsessed with the young man? No, I'm obsessed with like the way he does his content and the cucumbers. I've never seen his video.

But everyone's like Logan, Logan, everyone's really on it with like crediting people for stuff recently. Uh-huh. Yeah. So is the whole thing he's just making cucumber. He's slicing them up with a mandolin. A mandolin. And then putting some different ingredients into the bowl that he sliced them up into and then zeshing them all around. But let the record stay.

It chips. did follow him before this experience of the cucumbers and he's been making like fun videos all before but now it's like full motion mandalay bay chopping cucumbers etc i think people just want chips yeah but i feel like this would be a great like when we get hungry like this would be a really good option did his ass just like a healthy yeah it's like a kind of like an uh an asian soft sorts jenisequa okay wait at the beginning of this video that actually does look good it's an ad for K-18 hair. And I love one. I thought he was about to put it in there. I did too. It's because we're not listening with sound. I like when influencers will do their normal thing they do and they go like, he's like,

this is brought to you by. Yeah. It's on mobile. Nara does that. I love Nara Smith. You love Nara Smith? I love Nara Smith, but she does that a lot. And I love it.

Well, it's also really great when the brands can just be able to like, they're like, yeah, just put it in your fucking video. No, I really appreciate a brand deal that's just like, this video is sponsored by insert brand and then we just like don't hear about it again. Because it's like I hear like I get it. Like yeah, you did your job. I have you have raised awareness for the brand. The brand is in my head and I can just watch my like the programming that I came here to watch. I honestly think that's best case scenario.

I think so as well. And I used to work in influencer marketing and I would recommend that. And a lot of times the brands are like. Yeah. Don't do that. Are you wearing your glasses? I am wearing my glasses to see the screen. Burke was looking, she was walking over to my house the other day and she wasn't wearing her glasses, which she never wears her glasses. And she was walking directly towards me. And you got probably the way we're in like we were this far apart. And then she did an audible jump back because she thought I was trying to like take her. No, that's not what happened. I had seen you from across the way. And I was like, maybe like this guy could be cute. Okay. Looks like. I was in portrait mode.

Silhouette portrait mode. I was like, looks about my age. Looks about right. I'll do. kind of a closer look when I get closer. And then once I had gotten closer, I realized that's actually my friend Tristan. She had done a jump scare. And then we had gotten the Uber piece to go see the waiter.

Well, I'm excited for you to touch base with waiter. I have a photo of him if you need. Yeah, let me see. I do want to say that before I knew that this cucumber thing was happening, cucumber gate, I went to go get cucumbers because they're on my shopping list every week. And there was none left.

at Trader Joe's none at all Probably have to go to Airwant And get the pre-cut ones for like 900 No I know I don't Oh Brooke that's gorgeous I mean he has just to die for him I'm serious

You can just tell Yeah Sometimes you can just tell When you know you know Okay so trends for me right now on Twitter Yellow Discharge Gonorrhea

Okay Everything okay Connor It's the top Of your Google search history Yeah, I was wondering if you were searching for this Planned Parenthood And all okay Do we need to talk off camera?

We can always talk about that It's not based in your Google searches Actually, well let's see what mine is How do you find that? Oh, you just go to search. Is yours also? It depends, so I have yellow discharge Yes Oh wait, if you're watching this

I don't have yellow discharge It's just my phone is saying that So anyway, yellow discharge, chapel, HS4 at midnight. Is it? No. Sabrina. No, it's like in the hairy fandom. Timothy Shalameh.

And Tom Blythe. See, mine is Maddie. Maddie, yellow discharge. Poor things. Why do you have Planned Parenthood? Let's see. See, like these are somewhat catered to our interest. Trump is a convicted felon.

I have that one. Oh, I have hashtag LGBTQ. Chingles. shingles friends so interesting it seems like it's a little bit of everything

for every well oh I mean are you wet from that yeah I'm so let me chill so like put rewired something

oh you take a shower I've discharged all over me that's why yellow trending that's a good point I have also have Packers at Broncos

NFL oh that's good so it's all football season I'm literally obsessed I love when they throw it like the ball and they just like you know and there's like a team of a couple people and they're throwing the ball

and tackling each other and it moves out of that is your favorite team Tristan oh my god all of them I love the Packers when they play the when the Packers play the Brock. Do you mind if I tap in Zach for a second? Yeah not a problem man what's up no I was

saying a little bit like with my buddy I have a buddy I think you know you met him I met your buddy yeah no my buddy Yeah, no, my buddy's cool. You know, we were talking. We were playing golf the other day. Met this girl right here. Not really fucking sure who she is.

Yeah, she's hot, though. So I was like, yeah, whatever. A little hangout or whatever. Like back nine or whatever. So, yeah, we got some beers. We ended up going out, hit the fucking town. And it was just like so fucking great. And then I literally was like, oh, my God, I'm wasted.

It's amazing what he can do, isn't it? Yeah. You sound like Zach right now. yeah you know the thing about Zach and i thought you tristan was completely fucking with me until like maybe like a year into our friendship i didn't realize like a lot of people from the south go by their middle names do you feel comfortable with me sharing that's fine yeah my government tristan's name is zachary m zachary tristan so who you had just met actually is is an integral part of the young man sitting next me that was zach and it's kind of like a thing that i go in

and out of. But apparently when I'm on work calls and I've never met those people before, like if I'm introducing myself or a team or something, I start, I go into Zach a little bit. Not to that extent, but I do go into Zach. You just clean it up a little bit. I wouldn't say clean it up. There's something dirty about his natural voice. You think my natural LGBTQ voice is dirty? Oh, you guys have backed me into so many corners like a rat today. The internalized homophobia is showing. Your weenus is out. Oh, I checked. I checked. I checked. And it wasn't out. So you were...

I don't know who you checked with. She's being honest or truthful today. But your weenis is completely... You are full of cap. On display. You're cappinty toilet. Skippity toilet. And it's also podium.

So those are all examples of Jen Alpha slang that I didn't know. Can I ask about this link on the screen that says Influencers' face mask alarms doctors? You may. I've been wondering about that. You actually may.

Influencers, poop, mask alarms doctors. People are getting too extreme on the internet. Did you ever get any lush face masks? Wait. No. You know lush, the store? Yeah. They had this one face mask that like was viral, viral, like before things went viral, viral,

like early on when I was in college and it was coffee grounds. And you could eat it off of your face. They look it up, slurp it up off your face. I used to make one in college with coffee grounds and coconut oil. and it would get your... Yeah, it's an exfoliant. But tell us about the poop mask. Okay, well, this Brazilian model, Deborah PXoto,

has been ripped by medics over a bizarre skin care routine that involves caking her face and her own poop. Okay. What are they saying? She's saying it prevents aging. I can feel a little sick. Can we see what the doctors are saying about her poop face mask? There's no way that's her poop.

Her stinky face mask. Her stinky winky face mask. face mask. The beauty then pinches her nose with a clothespin to mask the stench and leaves the excremental XO layer on for several minutes before washing it off. This is actually giving me, like, I'm not kidding. To wash it all down. Okay, it's worked for.

She's probably putting her skin into shock. Wait, can you scroll up one more? What is the last? I was just like to smell it. It's worked for me and my skin has stopped flaking, gushed PXoto, who raised eyebrows last year after marrying her much older cousin. Oh, this. This is a satire.

They scammed us. The whole cousin thing was fake. Oh, you know this? I know this girl. Yeah, I remember the cousin. It's reminded me of the girl who did the fake scar on her face. Oh, yeah. Did we ever figure out if Scar Girl was real or not?

I think Scargate was not real. It wasn't real. We got jipped. Did you talk to her? I didn't. Do you want to? No, I'm good. I do.

So, yeah, this is, uh, I don't think this is actually human feces. That's great news. I didn't want her stinky mask necessarily anyway. Yeah. With me and my home. I was actually going to ask a horrible, like disgusting question. Move forward.

Would you use the, um, a fecal mask of like your number one celebrity crush? Like Harry Seiles. I'm not talking to you, Connor. I know you wouldn't. I'm talking to Justin. He's in more. God damn. I don't think I can do comments.

you would? No, I don't think so. Okay, wait, I want to, I want to rephrase, like, would you rub someone's poop on your face? No, that's not. I didn't say someone. Harry style, I said, Harry Styles' poop on your face? Yes. No.

That's what I knew. You would? I didn't say, I didn't say, I didn't say, yes. I was the question that I had asked. I heard a yes. Did you hear a yes? I said that's what I asked. I heard of yes.

You know, so, like, there are so many girls that'd be like, yeah, I would. Okay. I don't think I could. Really? And I'd say that on and off camera. I don't know. I don't believe you. I think that is too far.

There's some other things that I would do. Like what? I don't even like no. But if you provide an example, maybe I'd be able to say yes or no. And or maybe. I don't think we should have, I don't think we should say it out loud here today. We could talk about it ever cocktails at the restaurant with the waiter. After midnight.

I don't know what his hours are. He could be off. He seemed to be winding down when we were. Yeah. He was rapping. You can call and get an individual's schedule. I don't know. name. It's really easy to figure that out too. It says it on your track. I don't want to know. He was not my

waiter. The first time he was. The first time he was, but I didn't think, like, I didn't know it was going to be a long-term thing. I had to call this restaurant I really like because I want to avoid a certain individual that works there. Who? Because they make me lose my appetite, even though they're very, very nice. What's wrong with them? There's just, it's the vibe. Very nice. Always says, good to see you again. I say it's the pleasure. It's the pleasure all mine but I need you I need to know when you work so I can avoid. Off pudding. It's off pudding. Yeah. Have you ever left your number for someone at a restaurant? Mm-mm. I have. You have? You. Didn't work. When? Um, once at the restaurant with that waiter, but it was a different waiter.

Really? That restaurant knows what it's doing. They are fucking stacked. Um, I've done it a couple of times. It's only, I've only gotten like one text ever back. And then I did get another text back, but they were, they thought I was the young woman. in the party. Did you just go with it? No. I would have been really, it was sad, but I let her know,

but she wasn't interested. As we thought he was LGBT. Yeah. Q-plus, Q-I-A-plus. Oh, and by the way, the waiter that I'm interested in, very,

very high chance of him belonging to the LGBT. That would only make sense. Yeah. It would add up. I would be shocked if he didn't. A great news. Like, I mean, well,

bad for you, but like, that would be, you know, if I started dating him, then you would still, like, think my boyfriend was really cute. Yeah, I would. And I even encouraged you to try something with him.

I would have liked to. That would bring me happiness. Yeah, I do too. I'm all talk, and then I just get shot. Yeah, completely slammed up when the opportunity presented itself. Yeah, and, like, when I'm talking to the girls about it, and I'm like, oh, my God, like, blushing.

And then when it comes time, like, when push comes to shove, I'm not able to really put it in my all. Right. Can I really quickly ask about this website that we're reading this about, This is the New York Post in our suggested article Is I used my man's sperm for facials It gave me a goopy glow But then it ruined our relationship

The New York Post is the one who did an article About me shitting my pants Oh my God If you look up Brooke Averick New York Post They're depraved They're not like I think They're not like anything adjacent to the New York Times Oh okay

Okay my bad I misunderstood Are they not like a magazine? The Post The Post is I think it's Are there an online publication right? Issy can you look up Brooke,

New York Post. Wait, that looks like a very legit website though. No, I think like, oh no,

this is woman mortified to match with her brother. Sorry, I thought it was something about pooping. That was the brother fucking.

What's the YouTube? Toop. Okay, I get it. Okay, not a problem. Okay. All good.

Thank you. Wow. Brooke. I love that for you. Thanks. All right. Well, um,

I have a phone call to make. Really? So I'm gonna jump off but thank you guys so much for coming. Tristan, thank you for joining us today. Love you, Trish. It's been really great to be here.

Thanks for coming and hopefully we'll see you again sometime soon. And I adore you all and I can't wait for our, you know, rekindling coming shortly. Coming so shortly in a amount of time. Yeah. Short time.

Love you to death. I'm looking forward to seeing you again. Me as well. Love you all. Love you all. Bye guys. This week on close friends. You want me to see.

up and turn around my jeans, that you have to suck on my barbecue toes. Ed. What is it brought in relation to a brat worst? Brought Obama. Brought worst Obama. Sometimes bitch doesn't quite fit the bill. You were being a real bastard just now. Waffle.

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