Brooke and Connor Make A Podcast - The Toe Sucker

Episode Date: May 18, 2023

MERCH: http://bncmerch.com  Ad Free & Bonus Episodes: https://tmgstudios.tv  This week, Brooke and Connor show off their skills in the roleplay department as they reenact some pretty crazy encounters. Plus, Connor exposes the Kardashians for plagiarism and Brooke gushes over her love for hoagies and WaWa.   Highlights Channel: https://www.youtube.com/c/BrookeAndConnorHighlights  Email us at [e-mail] !! If you listen on Apple Podcasts, go to: https://apple.co/bandc Go to https://Prose.com/bandc for your FREE in-depth hair consultation and 15% off! This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at https://betterhelp.com/bandc and get on your way to being your best self.  On Tinder, it starts with a Swipe. Download Tinder today and explore all of the possibilities for yourself. Go to https://JULIECARE.CO to learn more or find Julie at your nearest CVS, Target, or Walmart today.  B+C IG: https://www.instagram.com/bncmap/ B+C Twitter: https://twitter.com/bncmap TMG Studios YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/tinymeatgang TMG Studios IG: https://www.instagram.com/realtmgstudios/ TMG Studios Twitter: https://twitter.com/realtmgstudios BROOKE https://www.instagram.com/brookeaverick https://twitter.com/ladyefron https://www.tiktok.com/@ladyefron  CONNOR https://www.instagram.com/fibula/ https://twitter.com/fibulaa https://www.tiktok.com/@fibulaa 0:00 We’re Strong Swimmers 3:20 Intro 3:49 Brooke’s Gas Station Adventure 7:22 Judgey In N Out Employees 9:56 In N Out Role Play 12:32 Prose 15:11 Car Hoarder 16:58 Murder Via Hairball 18:55 Buttcrack Hair 20:18 New inventions 22:39 Poober 24:24 BetterHelp 26:09 Nap Room 27:30 Hotel Toe Sucker  28:47 Toe Sucker Role Play 30:50 Neil Protocol  34:10 New Binky Errand 37:54 Tinder 39:01 Drugstore Shampoos 40:36 Connor’s Sold Out Show 43:20 The Outlier Friend 44:09 Hoagiefest 45:44 WaWa vs Buc-ees 46:59 The Best BBQ in Texas 47:55 Keep It Simple Stupid  49:20 Julie 51:15 Taco Bell Lawsuit 54:23 Circling Back To Toe Sucker 57:09 The Oldest Dog  1:03:10 Martha Stewart Cover 1:04:00 Tracking Down Wild Horses 1:06:28 SI Models 1:07:28 Taylor Swift Contacts  1:09:25 The Power of Fandoms 1:11:15 Phoebe and Bo Kissing 1:12:42 Kardashian Plagiarism  1:15:03 See You In Bonus!!! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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No ID, prescription, or age requirement. It's the number one OBGYN recommended brand of emergency contraception, and it won't impact your future fertility. That's Freedom to Be. Use us directed. Oh, I found out the most fascinating thing about the egg. Tell me. I will tell you. Okay, so there's this new study that just came out where, you know, I don't know if this is a conversation with girls, but guys are always like, I like, I'm in alpha because I was the fastest sperm to get to the egg.

I fought off all the other. So was I. All the other sperms. Oh, yeah, but like guys talk about being like a strong swimmer. Yeah, but I was also a strong swimmer. Do you think guys talk about having strong swimmers? Well, maybe that's the case. Uh-huh.

Yeah. I always forget that girls were all. also sperm okay but basically like I've only had that conversation with guys girls are never like yeah I got to the egg faster than the other sperm right I didn't know you guys talked about that all I haven't talked about it since sixth grade uh huh but it's important to circle back because we have a podcast that we have to fill up with conversation every week I was confused about yeah go back to the to the egg wait let me let me let me yeah I didn't know you oh my god I'm sorry I didn't know you weren't basically the study just came out that says it's not about the sperm and all the egg actually

makes it kind of impossible, puts up barriers to entry for sperm that, I want to say she, that she deems unfit to be her catalyst for pregnancy. I don't know what to call it. So the egg is, it's about female autonomy. It's about, it's, I don't think, yeah, it's, it's, I'm not going to say it's like a 50-50 split because I don't know what's going on in your, in someone's ovaries. I can't speak to the egg nor the sperm. Right.

So I don't know what's going on in their heads. Right. My understanding is that now we know a little bit more, and it's not all sperm racing upstream. Right. I guess what had confused me, I think I get it now, though. Let's talk to body from releasing an egg. So the sperm is just staying there, waiting for the egg? Okay.

Yeah. And then, so the egg is not going to drop in this case. Got it. I was thinking the egg already needed to be out. But it doesn't. Hey. A little refresher course can't hurt. It can't hurt anyone.

Yeah. And that's why. why I love Julie. That ad's going to like 40 minutes from now. We have a sponsor today called Julie, a contraceptive brand. And we had to circle back

and have a little refresher course. It can't hurt the science. I feel like we don't know. Not that it's not really affecting our day to day to know what happens. There are so many women that don't really know how our cycles work, including me.

Like there's so much. behind it. Oh, so many phases, so many. How about me? How about men? I couldn't even begin to talk about it. Yeah. Eggs dropping and such.

But that's even crazier that it's like happening in my body and I barely know. I mean, you and I are both not super in touch with what's happening in our bodies. Well, you know, women are born with all the eggs that they're ever going to have. I do know that. Okay. That's the only thing I know. I know that because there's just thing where people are like freezing their eggs. Yes.

Yes. It's I would be My eggs would be frozen Three years ago Really? Yeah I don't want to

I'm not to I don't want to talk about it Yeah sorry You know that That birthday's coming up That's exciting Mm-mm Hey Brooke

Hi Connor Are you ready to MAP I'm ready to pee Ignorance is bliss I'm living in a world of my own And it's awesome Oh I thought I was responsible for 9-11 when I was five.

Where were you? In Pennsylvania. Touch grass, might I suggest. We're just going to dive right in today. Well, hey guys, welcome back to Brick and Bracken. Welcome back to Brooke and Connor Makeup podcast. We're in the studio today like we are when we record this podcast every week. Brooke was a little late today because she had to get gas.

Yes, my car had run out of gas And Yeah, I had gone to the gas station Yeah, as you do And I was filling up my gas And I was actually like reading The What would you call?

Sign? What's the machine called Where the gas comes out of? The pump. The pump. I was reading the pumping machine And like reading what happens If you drive away with the pump in

And how it's $1,000 and I was like Damn, that's like, that's like that sucks. That's crazy. Get in my car drive away with with the pump still in. And that was one of those situations where it's like, I wasn't even like, damn. It was just like, mm. Yeah. Why not? Why would that happen? I was like, oh, yeah. But it didn't, like, it wasn't, I can't explain it, but it didn't, it wasn't that bad. Like, I blacked out for sure, but it was just the nozzle. Does that make sense? Like, it wasn't the long tube. I don't, how far did you get? I, not, not far at all.

How did you realize? You can feel it. Like dragging in the wind? No, because nothing was dragging. You just, when you know, you know. That's a thing. But they were able to reattach it. You're more in touch with your car than we are with our bodies.

I genuinely truly think there was a piece of me that knew it was. Like, I think I knew that it was happened. Like, I think I manifested doing that. So what's a $1,000 fine for? Is it a $1,000 fine if you did what you did? No, I think if you break it. And for whatever reason, I didn't break it. I just drove away with it in my car.

But you returned it. Yeah, and returned it immediately. I borrowed it. I was just using it for a second. It was like a total live... Jesus Christ, come on. Well, that's cool. You had like a cool gas station attendant that was like, you know what?

I'm going to let you off the hook this time. Yeah. I just kind of looked at him and then, because he was already out there and he was like side and was like, hold on. a minute and then and then just reattached it and then I was like thank you and I'm sorry and he was like it's fine and I was like okay can I go and then he was like yeah and it was really like best case scenario and unfortunately I feel like I'll do it again I don't think you will I think like now that it's happened once like you kind of just got it out of the way I'll be thinking about it more yeah

but now that you've done it got in away with I kind of want to do it right no but I feel like that was too good to be true. I know. Oh, I'm gonna get the $1,000 fine. And in fact, I might get like an extra fee on it. Right.

You know? Right. I could see you kind of like taking the entire, like a machine. I wouldn't turn around though. I would dump my car on the river. If I took the whole thing with me, I go, nah, no, I'm gonna get out and leave the car.

Yeah, rather than pay the $1,000, just pay. I mean, or I would like, I would rip it off and be like, oh my God, okay. We did, okay, done. And then it would catch on fire and I would explode. Yeah. Like something bad would happen to me. No.

Yeah. So I was a little late today. And that's why. Yeah. Thank you for making me out coffee, though. Of course. I had a car situation that happened as well. So I go to In-N-Out yesterday.

I haven't been to In-N-Out in-N-Out in-and-so long. You had an-out yesterday as well? In-N-Out's a special treat. I was just like, you know what? I'm going to get in-and-out today. I drive up to In-N-Out. and I pull up to the drive-thru lane and the guy is out there taking one of the guys with the iPad

and he's taking my order and he goes he goes are you going to be eating in the car today? And I go no why would I eat in the car? No, thank you. And he's like looks in my car and goes Are you sure? It's like so messy

I go and there's a like a bottle of saracha and the cup holder as well i was like yeah okay yeah god damn i will i'm gonna eat it in my car sure i was like do you want to get the rest of the you want to get the cashier out here and watch me eat it in the car it's so like a zoo animal so i got it and i ate it in my car and i was just thinking about that for so long that he like looked in my car waited a second i was like are you sure you don't want to just you can't get worse in there why did that matter to him like they ask you they ask you when you go to in and out they ask you Do you want to just, are you eating in the car today so they can set it up or else they wrap it and put it in it to go bag?

Okay. So it affects the presentation. And you don't want to be in a situation where you end up eating it in the car and have to unwrap it and it looks ugly. Yeah. Okay. He was just looking out for you. Hot take. I know.

Well, the situation is I ate my in and out in the parking lot of in and out instead of driving four blocks home. I think that's standard, truly. I can't imagine sitting in my car with the smell of in and out and not diving in. My mouth would, I would be like drooling on my pants. Well, I want to emphasize that I was about like maybe 40 seconds from my house with parking and getting out. He didn't know that. I felt like I should tell him. I felt like, no, I said I didn't want to eat in my car.

And then you said, are you got a good look at me and my, my car condiments. Right. Believe men. Believe men. And he said, are you sure? You don't want to just eat in your car? I have no tent on my window, so it is a fish bowl, and I'm sitting there eating my lunch.

Uh-huh. I could throw the burger at my house from where I'm, from where I stand. Well, I did. I ate in my car. Are you going to go back to that location again with that man? The only one near me. I might tell him, I'm going to take this one home. Okay.

Next time. What will you say? Hey, last time you got a, yeah. Okay. I'm the guy at the, the cashier. Okay. No, he wasn't the cashierist. He was outside with his iPad.

I'm the guy outside with my iPad. Yeah. Okay. He was younger, though. Like, we could have been the same age, and I just, like, didn't like the... Go ahead. Okay. Will you be eating in your car today?

You know what? No, I'm going to take this home. Thank you for asking. Are you sure? Why are you leaning into my car? What are you looking at? Sorry, I'm sorry. Yeah, I'm sure I'm going to take this one home.

I live four blocks away. Okay. Great. We'll get that out to you right away. Why'd you ask if you? you're sure if I'm sure I was just double checking doing my due diligence I noticed you asked are you sure after you looked into my car that's a part of my policy of the policy of the institution and restaurant as well what do you think of my car it's gorgeous yeah yeah the thing about my car is I'm a hoarder

so and I do that on purpose sir because if I ever find myself in a situation where I need a pair of cargo pants or an axe I have one and that that makes complete tense me. Yeah. Yeah. And the Saracha was here before I knew that I was coming in and it came with the car. Yeah. Yeah. And it doesn't move. It sits there. Totally. Because if I've ever found myself in a situation where I need saracha, I know it's there. Hey man, you're preaching to the choir. It was super nice to meet you. I'm going to eat my car today. I'm just going to that spot. I changed your mind. Okay. Great. I'll get that going for you. Fuck you, dude. Fuck you. I don't like your attitude. And I'm put, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm Why, he was being a sweetheart.

I'm putting in a complaint. No, that was belittling. No, I was being, I was being genuine. No, no, no. I was trying to show you, like, another side. That, like, he's a good guy. No, that was Patrick. That was patronized.

I don't agree. Yeah, that was. Oh. Is it just because I'm a woman? You think you're better than me? No. I know I'm better than you. Because I'm born with all the eggs I'm going to have.

Yeah, you find out of your eggs. You think you're better than me. You think you're better than me. Yeah, a little. I can get an iPad, too. I can stand outside with it. an iPad, patronize everybody. Sure, but you wouldn't,

you would have a hard time with that, I think. I would say, are you sure? You don't want to eat in your car? You know what sucked about the whole situation? You would be talking so much to them. You would say something about that. That's why I have a, aha podcast. You know what sucks as well as I'm eating in my car

thinking about the situation that happened saying, I could have said this. Going over the conversation. Yeah, I'm sure, bud. I'm sure I'm not. gonna eat in my car. I'm gonna go four blocks home. And I'm gonna sit in my bar stool on my counter with some music in the background.

Yeah. But I didn't say that. Next time. I said, sure, I guess I'll just eat in my car. Next time. Like a slob. What sucked is yeah, that's, that is not what my car looks like. I'm not like, there's no trash in my car. It's, it's clothes and appliances. There's a little trash, though. Sparkling water cans hardly count as trash.

There's some food remnants and wrappers now. Chips and my center console. What if I'm on a long drive or somewhere in a rush? And I haven't eaten. I guess I'm talking about the floor of the passenger seat as well. That's sand from the beach. Okay, let's not focus on the little nuances. But the word part about it was when I'm wrapping up, my burger, a little bit of this special

secret sauce from in and out spilled onto my shirt. That's an occupation hazard. That final thing that's like, damn, I'm disgusting. But then to get it off, I got a fry, and I scooped it off my shirt, and I ate, because that sauce is so good. And that was a low point of last, this, last week. It's just to be like, oh, I just scooped sauce off of my chest and then put it into my mouth. And I got a hair in there, too.

and then swallowed it and ate it. Okay. And then I still had the stain just as a reminder. That's actually the worst when you swallow a hair, especially if you have long hair and it's like half down your throat

and half out of your throat. And you have to like pull it out. I feel like I would prefer that. Oh, I guess because you're just like because you can't pull it. No, I'd like to pull the hair out of my mouth instead of swallow it. Oh. Does it not get stuck in your throat?

It's so small. My hair is so small. Okay. Did you know you can actually kill someone and this is like an ancient proverb or something like some some woman got caught Putting pieces of her hair in her husband's food because you don't digest hair it builds up in your stomach and I think Unless you like poop it out But if it doesn't get caught in your tracks like it builds up and there's no way that she murdered her husband by putting her hair You have to put Drano down us down a drain to kill it to get it out of the drain. I would it doesn't kill the drain the drain the drain

The drain is not alive. I really don't think that... Can we Google? Like, can swallowing hair kill you? The drain doesn't have heartbeat. Sure. It clogs the drain. Yeah.

It clogs your stomach. I feel like our stomach acid must be strong enough to destroy hair. It's strong enough to do a lot of things. Like what? Like, I don't... I don't know what, like, swallow. And it breaks on your food.

Okay. What happens if you swallow hair? Hair is made up of proteins called keratin. Cannot be. broken down by our body, by the way. They only can be processed at a very high temperature. They just end up passing out of the body

with other... Unless they build up and get clogged, just like anything else. I don't see any mention of a clog. You can choke on corn and also corn. No, you poop corn out. Yeah, but if it gets clogged up, if it clogs you up. Then you would

get an enema. Easier said than done. For many. Okay. Any time I've lived or spend any amount of time with a girl in the same house or shower, I always end up with somehow a long hair in my butt crack. I was literally going to bring up long hairs in butt cracks, but I didn't want to take it there today.

Hold that thought about the hair in the butt crack. A woman was resuscitated for 15 minutes but died shortly after she appeared to be infected hairball in her stomach, which led to an ulcer. The ulcer burst. Her vital organs felled. That hairball was infected. did. Right. And it's called Rapunzel syndrome after eating her own hair. So this sounds like more of my

strange addiction situation. Why are you laughing? No, it's, it's fun. We're laughing at something else. The butt crack hair. Yes. It feels so good to pull one out. I'm going to leave it there. That conversation, I'm going to leave there, but I just wanted to share that. Look at the drafts of my tweets. And this one has been sitting there for so long, because I'm like, that's too gross to tweet. It says, I said, was just thinking, how insane it is that men will never have to experience the feeling of pulling a hair out of their butt.

Then remembered men have butts as well in addition to hair. You should tweet that. I can't. I'm too scared. No, you can tweet that. You think? Yeah. Tweet it now.

Okay, I'll tweet it now. Okay. I was just thinking how insane it is that men will never experience a feeling of pulling hair out of their butt. Then remember men have butts as well as hair. Okay. Tweet. Fired it off. Send.

Okay, wait. This other draft. Free idea. Invention idea. Okay, you know how, well, at least for me, like when I'm, I'm so addicted to my phone that I'm not even doing things on my phone. I'm just opening an app, closing an app, opening another app, closing that app, going back to the other app that I had just opened closing it, rinse, repeat. So if we could invent a fidget that has the same sort of, that makes my brain release the same sort of chemical or, like, provides the same sort of stimulation as just going between apps. That's a cigarette.

You should start smoking cigarettes. Oh, yeah, holding the cigarette against your lips. No, like something to play with almost. Play the cigarette. No, I don't, well, I don't want to smoke a cigarette personally. If we could find a healthy alternative that will reduce my screen time. I also saw this tweet that was like he's not answering you. He's just trying to help you reduce your screen time, which love that take.

That's perfect. Yeah. So anyway, I would like that fidget. Okay. idea. You know, I came up with an invention as well this weekend. What? We got, we're getting straight to the inventions this week, which is something we never do. Yeah, that's been right into it. You really don't know what, how this podcast will be formatted. You can't put us in a box. No. You can put your phone in a box for a couple of hours and that would reduce your screen time. Well, I, I chew through it.

For anyone that doesn't know that story, I think we have like a lot of new listeners since the last time I told that. But, um, I went with Caucasian James to a John Malaney show. last year and they put your phone in like a neoprene sleeve, which is impossible to bring. You could run it over. You could drag it behind your car for 20 miles and you could pull your phone out unscathed. However, I chewed through it with my sharp tooth and got my phone out because I needed to check my phone. And I had not even a single notification. It's tough.

But it felt good to scroll. I'll give you that. Yeah. Could I use a cigarette in that moment. It really just, I don't know whatever chemical really. it releases, but I'm obsessed with it. I love dopamine. I'm always trying to get more dopamine.

Are there dopamine pills? Dope? Molly. What's dope? Dope would be dopamine, right? That's like what you're doing. It's heroin. It's heroin.

Oh, sorry. I don't want that. Okay. Yeah, well, moving on, I had this thought this weekend. On Friday, I went to a bar. And it went to Jameson. And I'm sitting at Jameson's,

and I was like, my stomach started acting up and I was like I can't I'm too far from home I don't want to go pretend like I'm interested in something in one of these boutique stores and then destroy their bathroom

you know because that I don't want to be known as that person so I was thinking I was like how awesome would it be to have a membership club you pay monthly and there's private restrooms with an attendant

and they have five private restrooms with with walls thickest a bunker. Yeah. Have you not heard of Puber? No. It's that. How much do you pay a month?

I think it's like 30 a month? Wow. Yeah. Let me download Puber really quick. Okay. I'm fucking with you. Oh. Okay.

Well, free idea of Puber. But I think that was an S&L skit or something. Okay. Well, how come no one's done it? I'm talking like Soho House level. Bathroom. Yeah. Great hand soap that smells good.

But I'm talking about, I want like a private experience that needs a bounce. Uh-huh. No one else, no one's allowed in unless you're paying for this service. I feel like they had made something at one point that was like people offering their homes. Like Airbnb, but like emergency. Like, but I think that was too dangerous. Yeah, that doesn't sound like it would last for even one day without one homicide. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. But I totally am in agreement with you. And I also think they should do that. for napping spaces. That's a vulnerable state to be in where you're unconscious and laying flat. It's like a cubicle in my mind.

My mind immediately goes to, I'm going to harvest your organs. Oh, my mind immediately goes to small little cubicle nap room where you can just, like, if it's shopping until you drop, for example, and don't like want to go home, the mall will have a napping suite for you where you can pay 1099 flat rate

to, For an hour? Yeah. I need an hour. Flat rate. Oh, you need that tiered system of payment. You're right. 10.99 an hour?

That's expensive. That's steep for a nap. And you can't do half hour. Now, I would be 20 for you. I would pay 1099 to shit my brains out in 10 minutes. Yeah. Who wouldn't? But a nap?

I don't think I would pay $10 for a nap. Oh, I would pay unlimited. Also, I get claust. So I wouldn't want to go into a pod situation. There's ventilation. Can't be in it. I would be scared. I'd be pushing on the walls.

I would be kicking the walls. Okay. Maybe not for you. Maybe you want to go to the premium suite. A room? Mm-hmm. The premium room. I'd be scared.

I'd get locked in there and someone's going to harvest my organs. It's like a hotel. I just saw somebody. Was it you that said that hotel owners have too much power? It was. And because, and here's our first headline today, great job passing me that, but Ton. Wait, can we pull up this link? I just saw it over the weekend. Someone else talked about it on their podcast, but I want everyone to know I had it bookmarked before they talked about it. I can't

remember who it was. Oh, I know who it was. It was, uh, we might be drunk podcast with Samarrel and Noel just went on this podcast and Mark Norman. Tennessee hotel guests wakes up to night manager sucking on his toes from a report from the police. Um, I don't know, do we have audio from him? I don't know if that video is going to be good. I can just read through it. An evening manager at a Tennessee hotel was arrested after he snuck into someone's room and sucked on this person's toes. David Neal, a 52-year-old manager at 4th Avenue, South Hilton, Nashville, allegedly crept into a male guest's room while he was sleeping on March 30th and got intimate with his feet.

So the guy made a key car to get into the room and entered it around 5 a.m. The guest told police he woke up to Neil's mouth around his toes and immediately confronted him. So let's roll play this, Brooke. I'd rather not. Do you want to be the night manager or do you want to be the man getting his toes taken care of? I'll be...

Serviced. I'll be the toe soccer. You're going to be the night manager? Oh, no, I want to be the one who was... You're having your toes suck. Yeah. Okay, so you'll... You should walk through the door.

Oh, yeah. You'll need to confront me. But I'm asleep. With my mouth around your toes. I'm not actually... Thank God I'm wearing flip-flop. I'm not going to do it, but... Okay, you're passed out.

Okay. You're sleeping soundly. Okay. Audio only listeners, we're doing a little bit of a physical situation here. Okay. My eyes are closed because I'm asleep. The clock strikes 5 a.m. Hell, stop sucking on my toes.

Toesucker. Hey, man. Hang on. Hey, chill. You're a guest at my hotel. This is standard. This is, don't act like you've, you, don't act like you've never been to Tennessee, Nashville before. This is what we do here.

I didn't sign up for this, and this is inappropriate behavior. Okay, I respect you setting boundaries. Thank you. You better help. I'll head out. All right, man. Stop sucking on my toes. Okay, okay, okay.

Just making sure you didn't want to eat in your car. All right, I'll see you. Just making sure you didn't want one more slur. That's probably what happened. I mean, it was probably that quick. It sounds like he confronted him like, hey, man. Stop sucking my toes. And he's like, oh, hey, that's all you had to say.

Yeah. That's all you had to say. You get an attitude with me all of a sudden. You think you're better than me because you don't want your toes sucked in my hotel? Yeah. No, it sounds like they were able to figure it out through problem solving. The guest just told police he woke up to Neil's mouth around his toes and immediately confronted him. He recognized Neil as one of the hotel employees that came into his room the day before to fix his TV.

clearly scoping out his interest. Oh, that's a total scope. Oh, you need your TV fixed. No worries. Let me, uh... He was scoping out those toes. Let me, uh... Make sure the TV is...

My toes are actually not in good shape. I'm not loving. I'm not loving how featured it is. Make sure that, uh, I'm seeing channel... See, this little piggy went to... Oh, Netflix. Yeah, that's good. I wonder how many people whose toes he sucked before,

or if this was a first of him. I'm looking at a picture of Neil right now, It's telling me that he knows his way around a foot. Totally. And I'm thinking he knows that that little piggy ran all the way home. Yeah, I mean, it's just, I'm probably haven't heard of him before. Neil looks like my pinky toe. Yeah.

Yeah. Can we, I want to see how this, how this wrapped up or if it did wrap up. Okay, police said Neil. Is that a mugshot? Neil never reported. Okay, so Neil admitted to the police that he had. answered the room, but he claimed he did so because he smelled smoke and wanted to make sure the guess was okay.

Math around tow. Sorry, I smelled smoke. This is protocol. Neil here. Neil here, I smelled smoke. I was making sure it wasn't coming from your toe. I was trying to put out the fire on his toe, man. Sorry, protocol. They teach you this in fire safety school.

He was arrested at his home in Lebanon on Friday. Wow, he got so far away. Lebanon Tennessee. Okay. He's currently jailed on $27,000 bond, which, by the way, is only $2,700 to get out. But he will be charged, so I assume that that will not be recovered.

Right. Wait, can we see that last sentence before we scroll down right above the photo of Neil? Police said Neil never reported smelling smoke to security and then there were no other reports of guests or staff smelling smoke at the hotel. Okay, well, he's got a nose like a hound dog, it seems. I think that this hotel is lucky to have him.

And because there was no smoke, maybe Neil got to it before it could get to any other guests. That is a way of looking at this specific case. For sure. It's important to... You know what? Human experience. Different perspective. Neil was experiencing something very different from a lot of us.

He was. And we will keep you all updated on this case. As it develops. We'll check back in next week. with Neil? Yes. Oh, okay. Where do we go from Neil?

Well, okay. Let me. I can tell you something that happened to me yesterday. Yeah, go ahead. Running errands for me is like the most impossible thing. Yeah. For whatever reason, it's like I will put something off until it's almost an emergency. So I had been binkiless for

What shirt are you wearing? Oh my God, where did you get that? I took it from someone. I love it. Thanks. I can't believe it took me this long. Were you wearing a sweatshirt over it? I was kind of, yeah, because it was cold out today.

Oh my gosh, that's gorgeous, Connor. Thanks, I love it. Yeah. It's a good thick fit so my nipples don't show it. Yeah. You want to touch it? Yeah, I do. Do you want to know what it says at the bottom?

Being funny in a foreign language? Yeah, it sure does. of the album. Did you know that? Yeah, but it's also funny because being funny in a foreign language doesn't translate. Yeah. A lot, like a lot of their humor and such, not translating to. Right. No comment on that. Okay. What was I saying? You had to go pick up a new weed pin yesterday. Oh, I had to go get a new weed pen, which I also don't feel comfortable. I've never been in a dispensary alone because I just like don't feel like I belong. Like, it's not. Like I just don't feel good. Sure. Feel good.

Sure. I still don't feel good about buying alcohol as well. Like I feel like I'm committing a crime. I feel like they're staring at me. Yeah. And I need to have my ID in a shirt printed out. So felt like I was committing a criminal offense while in there. And, you know, there's other patrons who look much cooler than me.

And then all of a sudden my phone, which has been on the fritz, glitching starts blasting to your Evan Hanson. Okay. Ben Platt is screaming. for his life. I am doing everything I can to try to turn off Ben Platt in this space and I could not.

Is this one of these which dispensary is it? High. It's called high. Oh. High on Melrose. It's on Malrose. Okay, I haven't been there. But I was thinking if it's like

what's at one place it's really cool looking where you get like an attendant? So it's not like that at all. It's kind of like past Fairfax. Ooh. Like where we. used to live. Oh, yikes. So it's like different vibe. Yeah. For sure nobody in there had ever heard.

Yeah. No, that's what I was thinking. Ben Platt. That's where my head was going. And they didn't want to. Yeah. At that. Um, so yeah, could not get that off for the life of me. And it took like 60 seconds, which doesn't seem a long time, but it is actually a long time when Ben Platt's voice is echoing through a dispensary. I would leave. Yeah. Why didn't you leave? Because I needed, I needed the binky Well, you could step out, smash your phone on the sidewalk, and then come back in. And then I need to get a new phone because my phone woke me up at 4 a.m. playing This Love by Maroon 5. Haven't listened to that song in years. I love that song.

I mean, that album is incredible. And like, sure, it was, it was nice to hear it. I would have liked to keep sleeping because I was up for a while after that. Right. That makes sense. So I think I need to get a new phone or maybe restart it. Turning it off and turning it back on. Turning it off and turning it on is never about it.

Has never heard anybody. No, it hasn't. But yeah, that sucked. And so I won't be running any errands again anytime soon. I love running errands. I could spend my whole life running errands. I can't. I can't.

I can't say the same. But I ran three yesterday. That's a blog. That's three more than I did yesterday. Oh, want to hear the other errand I run? There's been a lot of talk. on TikTok about going from using like natural shampoos that are good for you with healthy ingredients to reverting back to like drugstore like chemically shampoos because it makes one of our

sponsors is pros. I know. Is that okay? I still love pros and I use it. Okay. And you should use pros. That being said, I was like, oh, I want to try it just out of curiosity for a few days before I go back to my pros.

Does that make sense? Yeah, it does because I'm strictly using pros right now. Yeah. I'll offset this conversation. Yeah, and that's totally fine. This has nothing. This is completely separate from my love of pros. But I was like, okay, maybe I'll try to put chemicals in my hair via pantine and see what happens because TikTok told me to.

And this is not me telling anyone to use tampon. Tampine. Tampine. Tampine. But my hair is smelling so good. It's smelling like childhood. Do you think it's just nostalgia? Yeah, but it's also feeling great for the time being before I go back to prose.

Yeah. Does that make sense? It could be a combo of using both as well. Yeah. Exactly. It's the combo pack. Yeah. Well, that's exciting.

Good for you. Thank you. That's awesome. Yeah. I just I was like trying to remember what I was going to tell you I have my show tonight with Tiffany Haddish oh my gosh and bini drama how do you feel and Tim Dillon is a new edition oh my god wow and Esther Pee yeah I actually don't think I know her last name but I followed her forever uh she's so funny and one other person I can't remember who it is but it's it's quite the lineup yeah how are you feeling I wrote I mean I have all my stuff done I have to I have to memorize the nuance bits but I'm hosting the show. Oh, you're hosting. I'm hosting the show.

I didn't know that. Did you know that? I forgot, but yeah, this isn't the first time I've got that information. So are you doing a set as well as hosting? I start with a set, yeah. You start with a set and then you keep coming on to introduce. And doing bits. And doing bits.

Damn. That's a fatty. That's awesome, Connor. Yeah, it's good. Congrats. I keep waiting to put, to change my category on Instagram to comedian. You can. I don't know.

I think I need another. couple shows under my belt because I just took like the longest hiatus ever off after Italy. I couldn't get back into it. And now I've got a couple shows lined up. Well, I think tonight as you're going to sleep, you can change it. We'll see how it goes. Did you ever do flips on a trampoline? So yeah.

So one time, I used to be really good at doing flips on a trampoline. Yeah. And then one time I landed on my neck doing a back, like a belt backflip or something. And I couldn't do a backflip. ever again. It took me like literally so many years. And then I bombed that set. Or probably not even bombed. But like it was my worst set. And it was, it's like too scary for me to get back into it now. Yeah. That's like when you take a weed gummy and have a panic attack, it's never the same. Exactly. Yeah. It's exactly like that. It is. You just have to get back on the horse. I know I have to.

It sucks that I'm getting on the horse with Tim Dillon and Tiffany Haddish and Benny Drama. Wait, but the show that you bombed at, you had a good show after. Yeah, but then I went and did the Friday beers one And was just like so nervous for some reason randomly And it was like such a slow start And then took off to the races That's good that you took off to the races But like the beginning was so embarrassing

Because there was so many people there just looking at me But anyways yeah We'll report back Yeah please that's tonight Everyone's gonna hear this Thursday So you will have already That must feel nice that you will have already been done By the time people are listening to it

It will be done yeah Yeah. She will be laid to rest. Yeah. And then I go to a wedding right after on Friday morning. Oh, where are you going? Dallas. Oh, that'll be fun.

It seems like everyone's been in Dallas recently. Just Texas in general. Yeah, what's going on with that? It's a hub. It's a hub. Yeah. It's a barbecue hub. Yeah.

Do you know that out of every single one of our friends, I'm the only one from the Northeast? except for Jack Martine. Jack Martine, yes. Yeah. Yeah, that's crazy. Yeah, it really is. You bring your certain, Hey, I'm trying to walk here

to the friend group. Yeah, totally. That us, uh, oh, I'm just gonna squeeze by you. Yeah, excuse me, please, yeah. Don't really, or, oh, I guess we do jive with it. I would hope so. Hey, I need a hoagie. Yeah, give me a hoagie.

Yeah. And we say, I'll take, um, what do we, eat. I don't even know. I'm a cop. I cannot stop talking about hoagies and hoagie fest. Yeah. Hogi Fest is this thing at Wawa, which if those of you who don't know what Wawa is, it's this like, I guess it's technically a convenience store in Philly, but it's so much

more than a convenience store. And it's the one thing I, like, truly miss about Philly. And you can get hoagies there. And during the summer, there's this thing called Hogi Fest, which I don't even know what Hogi Fest is. I think it's just like a $5 hoagie or something. and I have just been like, I don't know where it came from. I think it was after Coachella where I've just been like, are you going to weekend one or weekend two of Hogi Fest?

Even though it's not a festival whatsoever, it's simply just a discount at Wawawa. But I can't stop talking about it and also saying Hogi, like, Hogi. I don't get like. Hogi Fest. Hogi Fest. Yeah, no, like Hogi Fest. Hogi. Yeah.

Sorry. Say it one more time. Hogi Fest. Hogi. Hogi. Hogi. Hogie. Hogie.

Hogie. Yeah, that was better. Hugi. That's like a completely different accent. Hogi Fest. Yeah, Hogi Fest. Hogi Fest. Hogi Fest.

Hogi Fest. Yeah. Hogi Fest. Hogi Fest. The first time I saw a Wawa I was coming back from Jersey and we were on the Jersey Turnpike. You're on the Jersey Turnpike?

Yeah. I was shaking my ass on the Jersey Turnpike. And I saw a Wawa and I was like, get pull over. So I wanted to go. You had never been at this point? No. Did you know me at this point? Had I been speaking about it?

I think like you with a combo of like everyone else. Like Jersey people Were all like Wow wow wow wow wow wow wow and I was like It was cool it was good Because I didn't even know anyone else You loved it No it did I was obsessed with it

Yeah But like we have Bucky's in Texas I've heard about that Which is like It's really tough for anyone else To bring a convenience store into the mix When we have genuine convenience stores That are bigger than like community colleges

Surely Buckees doesn't have Hogi Fest Buckees has Like its own zip code Okay, but it doesn't have hoagies. I've been to this Buckees, by the way. I know exactly where this is. Oh, I'm lying. Okay, so they all look the same as well.

Wait, where is it just throughout the South? I guess. I didn't know they had them in Florida. Buckees is doing well, I guess. Yeah, congrats. Yeah, they got themselves down in the, in the swamp. I would love to go to Buckees, but it would be really hard to go in with an open mind. given the wah-wa. Given the wah-wa.

I would get a wah-wah tattoo. Do it. Okay. Don't talk about a bee about it. Okay. The bird logo. It would be perfect with my bee and my butterfly. You are Cinderella.

Yeah. Or whoever can. I think that's Cinderella. You're doing Fiona. You're giving Fiona. Okay. People always ask me, like, Best Barbecue in Texas. you hate to hear it because everyone's got their heads up their ass but it's buckies it's buckies

every single time the best what in florida no in texas oh sorry and even austin best barbecue oh really yeah because just like a lot of foods you go to these really nice restaurants and they load it up with all these ingredients barbecue bear bones you just need to put brisket on a bun you just need to put pulled pork on a bun with some barbecue sauce Connor That is exactly the way I feel about Wawa's turkey hoagie. Just give me... That's what, Brooke. Just give me a roll turkey, some hoagy oil, lettuce, tomato.

Let's call it a day. Facts. Facts. Here's something I'll say to you. Yeah. Kiss. The band? Keep it simple, stupid.

Why are we adding all these ingredients? Kiss. I'm trying to give you a high five because I feel so strong. Knuckles? Give me some knuckles. I feel so strongly that you're right. Yeah. Keep it something stupid.

Yeah. Is that SpongeBob? I don't know. I think it is my freshman year soccer coach. I think it's also Patrick. Oh, no. He always said, you know what happens when you assume. He didn't say you make an ass out of you and me.

Oh, I thought he made that up. No, that's not Patrick. You can't say ass on a kids show. He was my football or soccer coach. Oh, your soccer. Coach said that? That's a saying. In my head, I was like, how do you know Coach Johnson?

When the hell did you meet him? I think, and I think Keep It Simple Stupid is SpongeBob. No. The office. I don't think that that's a saying that was coined saying. They're both things from a long time. Yeah. Coach Johnson did not make up Keep It Simple Stupid.

The phrase Keep It Simple Stupid is thought to have been coined by the late Kelly Johnson. Now, who the hell is that? Coach Johnson? Oh, he was Coach Johnson. He'd be late? Oof, probably. He wasn't looking too hot. Wow.

Lead engineer of the Lockheed skunk works. They're really just... That wasn't the name of my soccer team, actually. Wow, that's good. You know what's funny? This is like a really good liaison into another story. You know, Taco Bell has filed an official, like, corporate court case against Taco Tuesday, the saying Taco Tuesday, because it was coined so, so long ago

to use in marketing by this like really small mom and pop taco place, Taco Johnsons or something. There's no way of Taco Johns. Oh, I'm sorry. Taco Johns. It is, it's Taco Johns. Okay. Can we, can we type that in and double check? I think it's Taco Johns. Taco Johns. Yeah. Okay, yeah, Taco Bell announced today that they are asking the trademark trial and appeal board of the United States patent and trademark office to cancel the trademark registration that the Wyoming-based Taco Johns has owned for the last 34 years. Tocobel says the trademark has restricted restaurants nationwide from using the popular phrase that company believes Taco Tuesday should belong to all who make, eat, and celebrate

tacos. Agree. Agree. But that is like, they want to use it in marketing. Then just do it. They can't because Taco Jones owns the rights. That reminds me of who was sweet green suing Chipotle or the other way around? Chippole was suing sweet green. For having a Chipotle flavoring. Chipotle bowl. Okay. Yeah, same kind of vibe.

Just chill. Everyone can just relax. We know the difference. But that was the whole thing because I was an advertising major, Brooke. I always forget. People often forget. Yeah. Same way people forget I majored in education.

I know. Yeah. How could you forget that? How could you guys forget that? Yeah. Look at us using... Look at us now. So you have to actually consider from a professional standpoint, from like a corporate standpoint, that people are dumb.

So like one of the things is like when you're Chipotle suing on the basis that people will be confused that they're going to Chipotle. to order a Chippole label while they're at Sweet Green. But people are that dumb. You have to consider, like, beyond a reasonable doubt, like, would a, when an average person be so confused, walking into Sweet Green ordering a AAA ball, thinking they're at Chippoleet. There's no way. I promise. Like, I probably didn't say it exactly right, but.

No, you did. You have to consider, that's, like, what they would consider in court. So it's, like, subjective almost, advertising. That's why false advertising is, like, would the average person be confused? by this and a lot of times it's no even though it's like it is confusing yeah okay totally what kind of questions you have for me right now now what questions do you have for me about talk a tuesday now what kind of questions do you have for me about coach johnson and his coining of popular phrases what questions do you have for me about the toe sucker will neil be able to

pull together twenty seven hundred dollars to be released on bail by by next week something tells me No. Something about Neil is that he's a fighter. And he's going to get into your room and suck on your toes. Something about Neil tells me that he doesn't, like there's no one that would be there to help him. Something about Neil. There's something about Neil. Is Neil in the room with him right now?

The 1999 feature film based off of there's something about Mary. Have you seen that? Yeah, of course. That was a classic. I'm kind of like loving Neil's vibe. He saw what he wanted. and he went for it. I want to know the man who had his toes sucked.

The man behind the mystery. I want to know if he's able to find humor in the situation or if he'll ever sleep again. I know. I could really like, I know people say all the time like, oh, that would so happen to you. But like I truly believe like in my heart of hearts like that would happen to you. Me? Yes. You don't think you would get your toast like my meal?

Everyone would be shocked. And then you would be apologizing to him. If they would hear some of the. No, I would be like I feel sick. I'm so sorry. that here's $2,700. Yeah. And we're not discrediting the tosuckee, the recipient of the sucking,

unless he thinks it's funny than we are laughing with him. Right. Would you think it was funny? One thing about me, besides my feet being super ticklish, is that I don't know if I like this about myself or I hate this about myself, but I'm unable to, no matter how serious this situation is, not, I'm unable to not be able to find any humor in it. Like, I think that, like, everything is kind of a little bit funny. Most things.

It's hard for me to think about, yeah, most things. So you would think getting your toe sucked is funny. I think, like, truly think about. I think about. And I wouldn't be like, I'm like, I'm like, shake. And I'd be like, I don't know what the fuck he was doing in you. Right. Suck on my toes.

Right. Neil. Right. Really? So would you press charges? Is that even a thing? Like could he, if you didn't press charges, like, would he be fine? Like, it's not a...

Now, I would say, Neil, you can't be doing this if you want to run a business. You can't. Like, because words are going to get out. They're going to be talking about it in Brooke and Connor make a podcast. The toe-sucking hotel. Right. Season 15 of American Horror Story.

The toe-sucker. Yeah. The toe-sucker. Yeah. The hash-slinging toe-sucker. Yeah. A fetish. I guess this episode is just going to be called the toe-sucker.

It has to be. It has to be called, were your toes sucked? Wait. I think toe suck or be sucked. Not really. No. The toe suck or strikes again. Keep it simple, stupid.

Yeah. Okay, ISS. Okay, let's dive in with the last portion of our episode today into some. Ten minutes of pop culture. Ten minutes of pop culture? Because that's what you came here for. Totally. What would you like to start with?

Let's roll through these. You know, I kind of want to talk about the, oldest dog turning 30. Oh yeah, yeah. Because this is a nice shift from Neil. Yeah, yeah. So we here, okay, so over the weekend, Bobi, the oldest dog in history,

turned 31 today. And the B&O News Desk Live chose to share a picture of Bobby. Bobby. Is that Bobby? I always said Bobby in my head, but now that you say Bobby, it's definitely Bobby.

Human experience. No, it might be Bobby, but. I just thought it was Bobby. So they share this photo. You know my name was almost going to be Bobby. Did I tell you that? That would have been so cute.

You looked like a Bobby. I know. Sorry. Keep going. What kind of questions do you have for me about this picture of Bobby? What questions do you have for me about Bobi's rock hard bonner? Yeah. Now here's something.

Here's a great perspective he raised up yesterday. Oh, fucking balls. Shit ass. Was that your phone? Whoa, my phone vibrated and it made my mind. My liquid death vibrate as well. And I thought there was a B on my lap or something. It went,

Sorry, ooh. No, you're good. Try putting your phone on B&C make a P mode. No, I just need to move it away from my can't. My heavy jug.

My heavy jugs. Okay, so Bobi has a boner. So Bobi has a boner. I see yesterday, I'd be pretty pissed if I turned 31 and my parents shared, I mean, my parents, my friends shared a photo.

Well, I guess my parents shared a photo of me. You think you would be the oldest person in the world and your parents would be alive to post a picture of you? No, I said if I turned 31 and my pictures post a picture me with a boner, I would have a few choice words for them. Like what the hell? Well, would you be 31 in human years or dog years? You raise a good question. I think you need to be 31 in dog years for this situation to make that. Okay, so who, okay.

How old would he be if he's 31 in dog years? I think your first three years are seven years in dog years. Do we have like a calculator? Do you have a calculator, human to dog year? Calculator? He would be 217. Okay, so if your parents... Okay, hold up.

Hold on. Someone in Bobi LLC is lying about his age. He's not 21st. Well, give or take. He's not 31. Give or take 100 years. That's the one thing I want to say. He's not 31.

I'm so sorry to burst a bubble. Oh, you think it's a lie. I think it's a falsehood. I think it's farce. Oh, no, I think it's dead true. I'm looking at it. to Bobi's young 11-year-old eyes with the boner and all things considered, this is a young man. Unless they gave him a dog Viagra.

I don't know why they would. Oh, Skins said there's absolutely no way for us to know if he's the oldest dog in history. The odds that he is are not a lot higher or a lot higher. The odds that he is not are a lot higher. Right. Regardless, Bobie is a good. boy. Yeah, that goes up.

We can all agree there. Maybe this, you know what? I think that that person's saying he is 31, but there's no way for us to verify if that's the oldest dog in the world. There could be a dog older than 301. I do think he's 31 and I think, going back to your point about you being upset, if somebody posted that photo of you with a boner in your old age, I think you should be happy. So you raise a good perspective that I'm still able to get it up. Yeah. I think Bobby would have wanted this.

When I turn 217 and I'm walking around with my, with my boner. Uh-huh. People will say, I'm going to remember this conversation. Yeah, exactly. And say, you know what? Maybe this is all fine. Right. And I think you should.

Maybe it's not about the destination. It's about my erection along the way. Along the way. Yeah. I totally 100% completely agree. What questions do you have for me about. Could you give a dog of Niagara if you needed to breed your dog for whatever And maybe you have an award-winning dog like Bobby and you need more dogs to live to 217 years old, liars.

Would you give it a Viagra so that it could fuck all day and all night? Well, I'm sure you technically could, but I feel like that's an ethical moral issue. What some people would be like, that's animal abuse. Sure. I would probably. Okay. So my dog got into my Viagra on accident. Okay.

Then it would, I feel like it would work. I don't know, though. I'm just bringing up a conversation. Not. Do human pills work the same for dogs? Yeah, dogs have Prozac. Do they? Yeah, doggy Prozac, and it's just Prozac.

You should never give your pet. Okay, yeah, we should say this. You should never give your pet a human medication and less directed to do so by your veterinarian. I'm sure we have like a population of vets that listen to this episode. Just like, sorry. Viagra Botox and more, yes, vets use people meds on pets.

But vets do. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Moral of the story. Okay. Congrats on your boner, Bobi. Yes.

Here's to another 31. Uh-huh. Can we really quickly Google oldest guinea pig just out of curiosity? I'm wondering how long. Frankie could potentially be with us for better or for worse. Right?

Average is 5 to 7. Almost 15. Perfect. Yeah. Awesome. You're going to be 40 years old with a guinea pig. Mm-hmm.

That's so. I love. That's something else entirely. Yeah. That's awesome. Did you see Martha Stewart was on the cover of the SwimSuit Incorporated? Yeah. Sports Illustrated magazine?

She looks incredible. Hear me out. Yeah, she does. And she said the secret, you know what the secret is? She said. She had three bullet points, right? Yeah. Pilates three times a week.

Horseback riding one. a week and eating well. I think those were the bullet points. It just sucks that like I believe, well, I'm sure she's had some work done, which I would like the name of that doctor. But also like I believe her 100% that she just eats well and looks that good because she eats well. And it just sucks because like I could do that, but I also can't.

Hands are tied. Hands are tied. Oh, I think about that all the time. You know? It's so much if I just could eat completely clean. I could look like that when I'm 81, but I can't do to complications. Beyond your control.

Beyond my control. I'm meaning to eat in and out in my car. I want a horseback ride once a week, but my hands are tied as well. Yeah. So I can't access a horse at this difficult time. Exactly. Whatever happened to wild horses.

I think they're still out there. Where? In the farms. Oh, that wouldn't be wild. be a demonstrated horse. Yeah, I don't know if their horse is, are their horses just roaming around places? Yeah, there's, there's like a specific island that has them, but they're like...

Catalina? Not Catalina, but there's some up north, like... Wyoming? Polinas. Oh. Okay. Okay. Horses are so expensive, and you can own a horse.

So what's stopping people from going and grabbing a horse? The price. They're wild. Oh, the wild? Yeah. It's probably illegal. Who's keeping track? I don't know.

Are there equestrian? I feel that would be like... Police officers? It is the policy of Congress that wild free-rumbing horses and burrows, that's a donkey, shall be protected from capture branding and her. or aspen or death. Very cool. And to accomplish this, they are to be considered in the area.

We're presently found as an integral part of the natural system of, okay, so it's the same reason I can't catch like a bird. Have we had this conversation before? No. We've had a similar one. I'm having insane deja vu. Okay. What was roaming when you went to Catalina?

Bufalo. Maybe it was that about that. So maybe they're a little bit more loose-handed when it comes to like pigeons and seagulls but I could like take a pigeon inside or a seagull yeah I think it's it would be horrible it would be a horrible experience for everyone involved but I could and I don't think Congress would come at my right I think because pigeons are there's just like so many that no one gives it shit whereas those wild horses are few and far between is that the right right yeah that's good and I actually like applies really well because I'm sure they are kind of spread out okay how okay yeah so Martha Stewart

oh yeah she is huge win for horse girls she is thirsty she is they're strapping it up in the pool yeah she looks like really hot yeah she does i think yeah she does yeah 81 that's making me feel good about 27

who are the other oh i don't want to see them i'm cute oh god get them away i just want to know who it is can we do i know you can i know kim petrus Megan fox brook stater oh that's it so there's four of them

very cool yeah I'm it was a bold move to put to put um Martha on the front

and then they're just like throw Megan Fox in the middle right I love it yeah no I love that I'm obsessed with it yeah yeah cool

good job I guess to everyone um Brooke a Taylor Swift fan is selling her contact well I don't know if it's her okay sorry starting over

did you see that No, yeah, the Taylor Swift fan is selling, not Taylor's contacts, her contacts because they perceive Taylor. Physically, yeah. Okay. Like if I went to a 1975 concert, I would sell my contacts, which I don't have because I've never made an eye doctor appointment. But I would sell my contacts because they perceived the 1975. Did they sell? And this is on Deepop. I can tell because of the font. This is on Deepup. I don't know, but they were listed for 10,000.

Well, that's a great way to get your username out there by being. ridiculous online. Because look at the screenshots going viral and it includes it. What a great marketing tactic. You should do that. I will. Okay. We also perceived Taylor in person once.

Oh yeah. Do you have your contact? We were only feet away. I have that nasal spray that I was, could not stop putting up. You were housing that nasal spray. Oh my God. When we went to the AMAs and Taylor was there, I was so stuffed up that I was snorting nasal spray at the commercial breaks.

so we could I'm sure the particles of that of Taylor got into that bottle of nasal spray if you want it to sell if you want it yeah if you want to if you want to yeah if we're going to be what is that saying if you want to be cutting cutting pieces tiny pieces

I never heard it if you want to be cutting chipping at a stone no if you want to like cut threads cutting a am I making this out? I have no idea where you could be going okay if you're picking at little pieces of a of a story and details. Splitting hairs.

Oh my God. If you're splitting the hair that's stuck in my butt crack after a shower, then yeah, I think that that would be fine to sell for $10,000. The nasal spray, that is. That was so weird because that was before her whole, like, conscious series.

She was always Taylor Swift, but, like, I could have walked out and been like, oh, hey, you have a hair stuck on your shirt. Let me move that. She's always... She wouldn't have punched me. It would have been, like, a very...

We're in the same room already. like I think it would have been totally fine. Something happened recently. Like she's always been obviously massive. But something happened recently where it's like she is like God. TikTok. Do you think? I promise.

Okay. Yeah. Yeah. TikTok really makes people into. Well, it makes them feel like they're part of something. The whole like ERAs tour thing when people are like sharing their outfits, they're like, it's like a, it's like a thing that everyone can get involved in. Yeah, it's fun.

It's like going to camp. I feel like this is like the Ares Tour. and people can go to a couple and you meet other people that are into the exact same thing as you. You probably have other interests. You're dressing similar. You can appreciate other people's clothes. You know the same songs. I was just listening to this.

Oh, I was listening to the Always Sunny podcast. And they said when they do their live tours, it's fascinating because a lot of people will go by themselves. And they'll go sit there. And it's like, that's the beauty of going to see something live is that you meet people and they'll play episodes of their show in the room with other people there. It's like special to see it with other people. You're laughing at the same parts. You're picking up certain things with like strangers. And I feel like that's what Taylor Swift things is like.

It's like, oh. It's beautiful honor. Well said. Thanks. I listened to that in the shower and it really stuck with me. Yeah. I love a good fandom. Yeah.

That's why they said the movie theaters are so important because a lot of the shared experience of going to the movies is really special for people. Totally. Totally. You lose that when you're streaming. There have been so many movies who are in the movie theater. I'm like, this is the best thing I've ever seen in my life. And then I'll watch it at home.

And it's not the same. because it doesn't have that communal experience. There you want to be. Yeah. 150%. Let's leave everybody with one more tidbit. Phoebe Bridgers and Bo Burnham making out behind Keith Urban and Nicole Kidman and Keith did he posted TikTok?

Keith did post a TikTok of him and Nicole. And in the back Phoebe and Bo had kissed. And now people are like, oh my God, he outed Phoebe and Bo. And can I just say like people are. Yeah. Take it and run with it. Okay. I'll take it and run with it. People have been calling Phoebe and Bo a rumor up to this point of actually seeing them kiss, which has confused me. Because it's like obviously they're together. Why are you, why have you been calling it a rumor this whole time?

Like what have they needed to do to prove it to you? I guess, I guess this, but like they've been spending every second together holding hands. Like he's backstage at her shows. Like, what else do you want? And I feel that way about Maddie and Taylor. People are still calling that rumored. Like, do you want them to start humping on stage? Like, what do you need for it to be confirmed for you? Humping on stage is what I'm thinking at this point. What else can they do? He's sleeping over at her apartment.

They're holding hands. Everybody's saying that they're smooching nonstop. Like, what else do you want? People that are close to them are saying they're dating. Like, give it a rest. Get a job. Give it a rest. They are together.

I want to shift. gears because I just remembered this screenshot I took this morning that is so funny. And this is actually something. So these relationships have clouded Chris Jenner's plan to hard launch Kylie and Timothy Chalomey, which is so funny because they keep putting out new stuff and new stuff. And then this article came out from entertainment tonight. Kylie Jenner and Timothy Shalame are casually seeing each other, quote, but try to keep it, quote, low key.

A source tells E.T. that, quote, Timothy loves that Kylie is such a hands-on mom and a boss. He appreciates her confidence. Unquote. Now, when Pete and Kim Kardashian were dating, here's a quote from entertainment tonight. Quote, it actually has been really fun and easy. There's no pressure, the source says. Pete loves that Kim is such a great, hands-on mom, and also a boss, period. They're not, they are releasing statements. This family's like releasing, someone's releasing statements. This source is, and it's, that is word for word. Both, both of the quotes in these articles that are still live say hands on mom

and also a boss hands on mom and also a boss so are you saying that either that means it's confirmed because it's the same source or that it's fake I mean they can be hooking up but like they're not releasing statements there's a team behind

relationships that they go into because they probably have to because they're actual like they affect markets being in relationships I'm sure like people that are fans of Timothy Chalame, or not fans of Kylie and him together, we'll stop buying Kylie products or something. I don't know.

Something like that. So like them relacing a statement that everybody, like Timothy is so proud of her being such a hands-on boss, boss babe. I don't know. I don't know. I don't get how they couldn't have even, like that was a chat cheap E-T statement. They just got plagiarizing by essay.com.

What was the photo that was so blurry that of Kylie and Timothy? Like, was it, I'm at Taco Bell or something? They were at a taco joint. A taco joint. That is nuts that people saw that where you can't even see either of them and we're like, oh my God, they are dating and they'll see Maddie and Taylor holding hands and him at six shows in a row. It's a rumored relationship. Nothing is confirmed.

And we can leave on that. We'll leave on that. It's interesting. And we'll see you in the bonus. Yeah. Bye. This week, I'm close friends. I still always need a bargain.

I'm like, how can I load this bitch up? Now, I could get my raps to the size of a newborn. You went to her specifically for a year. For me personally? You're being an in-self. No, I'm not. I was not flirting with her. I was being nice.

It's the reason I can't go to fucking Trader Joe's anymore because all the cashiers either want to fuck me or kill me. I wasn't seething this rage until you put me in a corner. You cornered me like a rat. You cornered me like a rat man. I'm a rap man. Sign up on TMG Studios. TV to watch a full bonus episode.