Brooke and Connor Make A Podcast - They Hate To See These Fat Asses Coming

Episode Date: January 9, 2025

SUBSCRIBE TO THE BNC CHANNEL: https://bit.ly/45Pspyl   Ad Free & Bonus Episodes: https://bit.ly/3OZxwpr NEW MERCH: https://shoptmgstudios.com  This week, Brooke and Connor are back and sharing their 2025 ins and outs list. Plus, they break down their winter break plans, from Brooke’s liquid tuna disaster to Connor’s trip to the circus. We are so back! Join our Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/groups/5356639204457124/  Date now on Bumble and download the app today. This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at https://betterhelp.com/BANDC and get on your way to being your best self. Head to https://acorns.com/bandc or download the Acorns app to start saving and investing for your future today. Treat yourself at https://Quince.com/bandc for 365-day returns, plus free shipping on your order!  B+C IG: https://www.instagram.com/bncmap/ B+C Twitter: https://twitter.com/bncmap TMG Studios YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/tinymeatgang TMG Studios IG: https://www.instagram.com/realtmgstudios/ TMG Studios Twitter: https://twitter.com/realtmgstudios BROOKE https://www.instagram.com/brookeaverick https://twitter.com/ladyefron https://www.tiktok.com/@ladyefron  CONNOR https://www.instagram.com/fibula/ https://twitter.com/fibulaa https://www.tiktok.com/@fibulaa Hosted by Brooke Averick & Connor Wood, Created by TMG Studios, Brooke Averick & Connor Wood, and Produced by TMG Studios, Brooke Averick & Connor Wood. Chapters 00:00 being a teacher pays off 00:47 intro 01:07 my fat ass is racking up points 3:13 welcome back!! 04:30 flights with jonathan 08:38 anti-feline passengers 10:27 bumble 12:13 jonathan in hysterics 14:50 bark air  15:44 cat-free rows  18:20 la fires 19:19 alarm sounds  21:29 bouncing is on the y axis 23:08 betterhelp 24:57 stress dreams 27:49 brooke's water birth 29:20 my fat ass is always taking advil 31:30 agree for the plot 32:32 ruined stomach lining 37:27 Connor’s Chill Ass Break  41:31 Cirque De Sole 46:55 Quince 48:53 Seeing Andrew Garfield  55:28 Everyone is Engaged 57:47 Reflecting on 2024 Resolutions  1:04:35 2025 Predictions 1:07:21 Ins and Outs of 2025 1:11:56 That Friend by Sabrina Brier 1:14:11 See You In Bonus!!! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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You know what I did recently? I had probably upwards of 20 Target gift. cards from when I was a teacher that I would get like over Christmas or whatever from parents that I had never touched and I kept them all and I recently just applied every single one online and it was like $400 that I had just come into and I ordered my cuck chair is completely comped my my cuck chair is actually 500 USD from Target but it was almost completely comped by the parents of the children that I taught. So, you know, being a teacher really pays off. Down the line.

Stick with it. Hold the line. Stick with it. Maybe you all could get a cockchair too one day. If you lucky. Thank you teachers for everything you do. I went the other day with my sister. We go to this restaurant, Great White.

And I love Great White. You know I love Great White. Who doesn't? And they have an app. And I always say, I'll pick it up. And then everyone can Vindmo me because I pay with the app. And you get so many. points. I take all my clients there. So I have racked up all of these points from entertaining

clients. And just right off the top of your head if you could rattle off a few clients. Mr. Gerald Dean. Mr. Geraldine, he lives, he's a big guy. He's a big guy in the industry. Yeah. He's one of the bigger guys in the industry. Geraldine. Yeah. I couldn't remember his name. he goes by several aliases Yeah Oh the alias So yeah he's one of my bigger clients He keeps my wheels turning

If you know what I mean He keeps my wheels greased I think I do He keeps the lights on Yeah So yeah I've racked up some points over there At one of those at the restaurants

They know me, they know my name They hate to see me come They love to watch your fat ass coming They hate to see my fat ass They go, we know this diva. He's about to eat. I'm sorry. And like, this is no offense to Connor. I can't stop saying fat ass about everyone. It's fun. And it's not derogatory. I just want to get ahead of that. I know what I have. Mr. Geraldine and his fat ass?

Well, Mr. Geraldine, yeah. I don't really want to bring my clientele into the conversation about fat asses. But it's not derogatory is what I'm trying to say. Well, he's one of my biggest accounts. So I'd rather not drag him through the mud. That's what I'm trying to say. Saying his fat ass is not dragging anyone through the mud For the new year. Yeah, well see his fat ass can eat too. Yeah.

Because I racked up so many points in the other day when I took my sister to Great White. And I paid with points. And it was pretty cool to do. They go, your actual whole meal is comped. So, whatever. Should we welcome everyone back? Oh, my gosh. Yeah.

Brooke, yeah. You do it. Yeah. We just talked about my fat ass for four minutes. No, I'm sorry to cut your fat ass short. I'm just going to welcome everyone. My fat ass is just going to welcome everyone back. Hi, guys.

Welcome back to B&C. MAP. Happy 2025. We missed you so bad. I'm so happy to be back. And I think I speak for Connor's fat ass when I say that he's, his fat ass is happy to be back to. I really am. I have so much to talk about today.

I'm sure your fat ass is too. My giant took us. It's just fat ass. Oh. Oh. No. Started crying. Yeah, my fat ass does have a lot to share as well.

Share it. I actually started crying a little bit. I think I'm just in a spot where I've built up a lot of tears. Go ahead, though, please. No, I've passed the baton. I don't want to go first. I don't want to share first. Okay, well, I guess we can just share about...

When's the last time I saw your fat ass? Before Christmas. So let's talk about what we did over Christmas and stuff. Yeah, okay. I went to Florida, which I always do. You know, my fat ass loves that hot tub. But I brought John, Marie, my cat, which was a huge mistake. Because I know cats aren't big travelers, but I did, you know, I wanted to try because, you know, maybe he would like being with me instead of being home alone.

Yeah. Basically it was an experiment to see, like, is he better off at home with a sitter without me? Or is he better off traveling going through that stress, but saying with me? Answer. Here's the answer for you. His fat ass needs to stay home. The prior. Yeah.

He was fine on the flight there, but he got really big like Puss and Boots eyes, which made me really sad because he gets this when he's playing too, which is really cute. But also if he's stressed, he'll go full Puss and Boots, which is so sad to look at. So he was Puss and Bootsizing the whole way there. He was pretty quiet on the plane right there, which was good. But then once we got to Mom and Pop Ups Chateau. They're what? They're chateau.

Oh. They just have a house. I'm just going to call out a chateau. Oh, I love chateau. I'm going to add that to my words of that I like. Do it. He was not himself at all, which made me really sad. Just like very shy, didn't want to be touched.

If I sat down next to him, he'd kind of get up, which is very unlike him because he's somebody, he's someone that likes to sit on your neck and on your face and, you know. he was not happy. And then the second day, he actually started projectile vomiting green sludge, which for me was really challenging because I'm someone that didn't even want to have children

because they might throw up. And that wasn't there's always a chance. There's always a chance that they would have thrown up. So this was one of my first huge, huge challenges as a parent. Obviously, I wasn't taking any chance as we went right to the hospital because I was just so paranoid. He was diagnosed with acute anxiety

Just like his mom So his fat ass is actually gonna start Projectile vomiting if he leaves the house Just like his mom For the whole week he wouldn't really let me touch him Your aura is show Pets take on just like the temperament of their owners Yeah

So he is housebound from now on I felt literally horrible He was so not himself It's kind of a weight lifted off you though Because knowing that you can leave your cat at home and it's a much better situation. You're not like, oh, like, I feel bad. I'm on vacation. Totally. Totally. Now I feel a little bit more guilt-free leaving him with a sitter because I know that like the alternative is worse. But also my cousin's cat was there. Luke. So John and Luke the

apostles actually got along really well, which was really great. And that's making me think that maybe I will get another cat. Matthew. But I won't love. Yeah, I might get Matthew. I won't love Matthew as much as John. No. So that's hard. Jesus did neither. Which now I know. it like, oh, obviously, like, my parents must love me the most because it's not possible to love another kid once you get another one. Your parents must love you the most. Even though they might not act like it. I know mine might almost act like they might like love the other ones better. They'll always love the first form more.

I can say that as another. You can feel it in your chest. Yeah. Can you imagine like getting another dog after Max? He wouldn't love that as much as Max would. No. And I've, I've thought it like maybe I should get a damn Yorkie because I can put that shit in my pocket. And that like, I don't have to worry about like, you know.

he wouldn't he certainly wouldn't be home with his grandparents right now if i if i had a damn yorky or a shih Tzu or some shit like that it almost feels wrong to get another cat because i'm getting it for john marie and not me yeah it's like it like feels ethically like a little bit wrong no because it wouldn't be i just like i i couldn't love it as much as john it doesn't need your love it needs john's love it needs it needs it i would feel too guilty needs male love i don't know but it is something that's something that's i don't know but it is something I'm thinking about. Consider it.

Sleep on it a couple times. And then the flight home was probably one of the worst eight-hour experiences to date. He was, when I tell you, screaming bloody murder. Oh, shit. Oh. Do you mind if I rewind for a second? No. Obviously getting onto the plane with him and a man is in my seat.

And so he said the flight attendant put me here. And I was like, oh, yay. and the flight attendant came over and was like, would you mind sitting in the back? And I was like, oh, I was like, well, I did pay for the seat because it's an aisle and I have a cat. And then the woman in that row on the other side goes, oh, if you have a cat, you can't sit here.

I was like, oh, my God. Yay. I paid for the seat. Yeah. And she was like, I'm just horribly allergic. And I was like thinking in my head like, I'm empathetic to you be. being allergic to a cat, but like, it isn't, unfortunately, it isn't my problem.

This has, you've raised a bigger issue with airlines in general. Like, obviously it's not, it's not anyone's playing. Like, if you're allergic to peanuts and they're serving peanuts, like, I don't know. What, what do you do? Or like, if there's a baby, they literally need to figure out how to like segment off airlines for specific groups of people, but it would take forever. And she was also like, and I don't have my medicine. And I was like, okay, well, if you're that allergic to cats and you're going to be in a space where you know like animals are on board. Bring your meds. Anyway, I hate her because not, I understand that she's allergic to cats, but then her husband goes,

ugh, I hate cats. Like, what? You're going to tell me that I have the most gorgeous cat in my carrier and you're just going to look at me and go, ugh, I hate cats. Shut. Like, shit. They're probably anti-somatic. You think?

Yeah. Almost think they're anti-feline, which we all, we, propaganda. We have literally been raised to hate. cats and it's sick I was a victim of that too I literally I'm not even kidding like I don't give a shit about dogs anymore like I'm you stupid bitch I'm like a full cat no I get it it's it's it's it's it's nurture it's what you have in your home but can you put yourself in that man's position and imagine that there's just like a girl walking down the aisle with a cat and you just look at her and go I hate cats like what do you think would possess someone to do that anyway obviously I went to

the back of the plane obviously yeah wait where did what would your seat aisle is still? Yeah, just row 30. Ro 30. No recline. Eight hours. God, no. Obviously, worst turbulence I've ever had in my life just due to the back of the plane,

and John was, I'm not kidding. Hysterix. In hysterics, screaming bloody murder, I was like so, it was like having a screaming baby. you just like, I fully understand the pain of that now. It's like, it's so, it's, you feel embarrassed and there's just like nothing you can do. So I was like, oh, I know what I'll do. I'll just open a liquid tuna treat.

Oh, my God. I'm on that I'm on that dude and lady's side now. Yeah, I would have been too. Obviously reeked, smelled up the whole plane. He didn't touch it. I feel even more horrible. I literally, it was like desperate times. Like I didn't know what to do.

I made a decision. It was the wrong decision. I feel fucking horrible, of course. My fat ass made the wrong decision in that moment. And that was about 30 minutes into the flight. rest of the flight Connor smelled like the inside of a fish I feel bad

yeah I mean it was a bad decision but I was literally like frantic and desperate you described my exact experience with Max just being like I can't do anything unless I like put a butt plug in his ass like he literally is shitting everywhere and like I I'm just holding him and I can feel he's pooping through my shoe at that point like and I'm like there's nothing I can do and he's so like he's so big and like I'm looking at everybody and they're mad at me and I'm like I don't know what to do like we're all in this together unfortunately now you you are in this with me I felt I felt

I felt horrible too because it's like yes I did sign up for this and like no one else signed up for this but yeah I mean we're in the air we are at 30,000 feet so luckily John didn't chart I know I was I was thinking about the people screaming babies like you know they're not like yeah I love this shit like they don't want their baby to be screaming, you know, and it's like they had to get their baby somewhere. Like they're not going to put them under the plane. Like just put your headphones in too. Yeah.

I had to do it. I just would, I just think that we put a man on the moon. I just felt so bad for John. Make a baby airline. Make an airline for babies. And just put the babies on it with the mom or the dad or the families. And they can all fly together. They made a bark air.

I just saw a TikTok for this airline called bark air. And I was like, oh maybe they'd be good it's like a little PJ it's like a private plane and it's just for people with dogs and like this this lady made a TikTok and lady she's probably younger than me she flew with her st. Bernard it was this massive like 100 pound dog and she's like it's lovely like they serve you food there's other dogs on board like they gave us a ton of space we got on first because we had the biggest dog and like wow maybe I'll look into this total price 5600 from los angeles to Vegas.

40 minute plus. There was like peanut free tables in the cafeteria. There should just be peanut-free rose and or cat-free rows. Because like at the end of the day, it wasn't my fault or that lady's fault that she was allergic to cats. But the only reason I hated her was because of her. She did give me attitude and because of her husband, who I do think needed to be forcibly removed from the vehicle.

Just for his attitude and personality as well. but yeah they definitely it's it seems almost like an easy fix to just be like do you have severe allergies that we need to accommodate here's here's a row for him what you should you guys should go to the back maybe well it's like maybe that wouldn't even have to happen if they just put a button on a button on a button on the um when you're buying your ticket like an extra button to check off for like allergies and such. Button's not the right word. Yeah. I mean, when you pick your seat, I'm trying to get to like what I'm where my brain is telling me to go. Like, and I don't have to explain it to you guys.

I feel like I'm like really drunk and trying to like tell you my address. When you pick your seat, it should be like an icon. Like there's a baby in this aisle, you know? Be wary. There's a cat in this one and a carry. Like, like, pick your area given what's available. Just something you would think. Or if like there's nothing else available and it's like, I hate babies. You know? Or I don't, I don't hate babies. I don't want to fly next to a baby. Like, I should get a discount on my ticket. Well, maybe not, because I waited so long. It's a beautiful thing about me is that, like, I convince myself that flights will be cheaper if I wait till the day before the flight. It's never happened yet. I'm a gambler. Like, I keep thinking I'm going to figure it out. No,

I haven't. Well, at least if it shows, like, if you waits the last minute and then you're stuck in a row with a cat, and it has a little cat icon, it's like, you knew. Yeah, you made your bed time to lie in it bitch bring your meds yeah bring your meds bring your meds bring your med bring your pen can't stress enough sorry actually my nearest resolution is to stop over explaining so i'm gonna just leave leave it how it is yeah and stop apologizing i was gonna say it's of course okay to be alerted to cats i don't know of course i have no problem with that i don't know is it was more of an attitude the attitude was my issue i'm i'm on board with you i can't explain the level at which i'm on board with you because I'm at a loss for I really before we started recording I was talking so good

and then we started recording and like genuinely I feel the fifth grade reading level way I can't get a thought out also just so everyone's aware fires are in LA right now raging fires so scary I feel like I went outside for I walked down to the beach to look at it from the beach apocalypse I felt from West Hollywood it looks like the apocalypse I felt like I vaped like I went into my car and I was like it's heavy with the smoke no it's so sad and i don't think i've ever been in a position where i've personally known so many people that have been so affected like so like probably five people that i know their houses have burned to the ground to the ground and you know them too in the palisades i know one we'll talk yeah it's just like so it's so devastating i mean it's

equally devastating not knowing people but yes of course but it's just like it's it is a little almost scary and it's so close to you it's freaky yeah so thoughts are with everyone prayers are with everyone um and there's no easy way to transition from that to how annoying i find my alarm sound but i'm going to do it okay we have you noticed that so i got the new phone and have you noticed i woke up in a horrible mood not because obviously it should have been because of the fires, but because I got the new phone and have you noticed that when you pick a random time on your phone, like when you make a new time to wake up, like I just randomly have like 6.14 a.m. for some reason, it like auto chooses an alarm sound for you. Has anyone

noticed that? Like they're always different. So mine today, by the grace of God, was, we're, bam, bam, wham! So I thought that we were being evacuated for the fires. I'm like, it's happening it's happening no it's just like hey wait hey heads up it's time to get it's time to head out for the podcast and it's just weird that like we mothers in the womb give their babies mozart bach shakespeare me and bach her and bach and then we give ourselves this and like we're we're waking up out of the womb of our bed sheets you can set it i used to have mindset to my one song on iTunes, which is the Cheetah girl's song, Na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na.

If you purchase that song on Apple music, you can set it as your alarm. Which I would recommend. Now it's just like, radar. What? You wake up to radar? I, I, I, gonna play radar. Yeah, because if it's a pleasant sound, I stopped getting up.

It needs to be unpleasant for me now. Wait, sound radar. It's like, Does that make sense? Wait, what is it? It's like brachn-k. That one? Oh, yeah, that.

That's radial. Sorry. I need to play mine. Sorry. No. That's what I woke up to this morning. Get up! You have free will and you can change that.

Someone said that they're trying out the dogs barking and they said that that actually wakes them up really nicely. Unfortunately, radio wakes me up. I guess the job done. That's not unfortunate. That's good. But sometimes I, when I play a song, all of a sudden. And for a while I had hypnotized by plies. You got me so hypnotized the way your body rolling round and round.

That booty keep bump and tiddies are bouncing up and down. I thought it was booty. It was booty keeps bouncing. It might be fat ass. That fat ass is bouncing. The titties are also bouncing up and down. Titties are bouncing moving side to side maybe they may not be moving on the x-axis. And the booty is moving more on the Y.

There's no way that titty's moving on the X-axis. Titties could be swanging this way. There's no way that someone would sing a song about that. Titties keep moving, left to right. Booty goose bouncing. Titties keep moving. Left to right. I could see it.

That would be like tapping your head and rubbing your belly. If your tities are moving this way and you were also bouncing. Yeah. I just don't think that that's what the song would be about. I think it's awesome. I think it's awesome. I think it's awesome. If you're ambidextrous with your booty and your titty,

That's great. Yeah. And to each their own. I think that's a great goal to have. Yeah. I think it's bumping and bouncing and they don't specify the direction. Butto keep bumping. Titty's just bouncing up and down.

Yeah. The Tities were literally bouncing up and down. Right. I don't think we're getting X and Y axis. Let's not rewrite history. The Titties are bouncing up and down. The booty was just bouncing in general. However, bouncing cannot be left to red ever in any universe.

Not in ours, not in theirs. Yeah, by definition, bouncing is Y axis. bouncing is Y axis. Tiddy's just swinging around. Those tics keep swinging up, left to right. Booty's just bouncing. Tiddy's just swinging left to right. Girl, winter is so last season. And now Springs got you looking at pictures of tank tops with hungry eyes. Your algorithm is feeding you cutoffs.

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All right. Anyways, what I was going to say is sometimes I would have dreams that I was just going like this. Like the song would just go into my dreams and I was just kind of working the night shift in my dream. Yeah. It wouldn't wake me up, though. That's what I'm saying. That's why you need a horrible sound. Because I would sleep right through a lot and I need to Nana.

It's a glorious song. It's a ballad even. I have to tell you about my new stress dreams now. Really? Yeah. I've been sleeping through the night. And I'll tell you exactly why. I'm so traumatized by my past jobs.

And then like not really having a traditional job that's also traumatized me. But being like every day I wake up, my career's over, you know? Yeah. I don't know if anyone else has that. So I sleep really lightly. and recently I have been sleeping at all. Anyways, my dream I had the other night

I got to a show. I drove 90 minutes to a show. It was like an hour and a half and I remember getting there and they go, okay, you're on, you're on for one. You have one minute. On and one or you have a one minute set? We got you one minute on this show.

Okay, you've a one minute set. And I go, you guys, like, I remember just being defeated. Like, you guys, I just drove almost two hours here. Just like, no biggie, just take me off the docket for tonight. I'm not going to, I don't have anything that's a minute. And they go, oh, oh, you're too good to do a minute. Oh, he's too good to do a minute. And I go, fine, whatever, I'll do the minute.

And they go, no, we got you 15. And then all of a sudden, I'm like, wait, I don't have 15. And I had to go out. And it was in front of my high school, my high school auditorium. And I was frozen and then I woke up. I had another one too. I know no one cares about dreams at all. Oh, this one's good.

This is a good one. Does anyone have dreams where like you are in your apartment or like a house that you've lived in forever and then like you suddenly find like extra room in your apartment? No, actually. Oh my God. I always have a dream that I'm back in my like childhood home, but there's never been an extra room. I always have dreams that there's like a secret third floor that I never knew about. That's fun.

And I had a dream the other night that there's a closet in my apartment that I like just shoved shit in and never opened ever again, which is great to know because I'll just get rid of everything when I, and I, um, I went in there and it was a full room with a pool. I had an indoor pool in my dream. Awesome. So the thing is it's always going to lead back to a body of water for you. Yeah, I'm an aquarium. Which is rebirth. I'm aquarium. Yeah. Rebirth. Yeah. How so? Isn't that what like water symbolizes? Mm-hmm. So I'm going to think about.

Booty keep them. What song you're going to play during your water birth, do you think? When you say water birth, do you mean when I give birth in the water or when I'm reborn? Both. You can pick a song for both when you give birth in your little pool at your house, maybe in my secret room pool, and when you are reborn. So if I were to do a water birth, which I personally wouldn't do. Why would you not do that? I feel really strongly about being in the hospital. Me too.

With access to as many sedatives and like numbing opportunities and anesthesia as possible. Give it to me. So I'm not doing a water berth. Do I still have to answer? I don't want any sound. I don't want any sort of simulation. If you don't have any sound, then it's just going to be like random splashes though. Which like, what do you?

I don't think I'm going to be splashing out. I don't know what you're doing in there. You know what? It's so crazy, like, me neither. Because, like, all I've seen is, like, the movie versions of birth. And the one I saw in health class, it's like, you won't know what it's like. You don't know if they're splashing and all the intricacies until you do it. I can't wait to see the DMs we get.

Um, water birth expert here. Uh, there is no splashing when you have a water berth. Yeah, I have no interest in that. I want to be waterborne. Like, I think they'd feel really good to, like, slip out and be underwater and, like, I'll move on from that sentence and say that. Oh, here's what I was going to say. I don't really understand how you can't drink when you're pregnant.

Like you can't smoke. You can't do any drugs or anything, obviously. But then you can get like every med known to man when you're giving birth. I guess because it's no longer like feeding. You're not feeding the baby. I think medicine is different than alcohol and like hard drugs. You can't take like Advil when you're pregnant, technically. I don't.

Is that true? I made it up right here on the spot. I don't think that's true at all. But I think that it is probably... You can definitely take a lot of medications when you're pregnant. You can eat deli turkey, but you can take medication? Yeah. No, it is not recommended to take Advil.

Well, it's never recommended to take Advil, honestly. True. So I think, like, may be safe before it. I don't know. They're always saying Advil is like never the right option, but personally... Cidaminifin is one of the few pain medication that's generally... My fat is always going to be. taking Advil.

I've been taking an Advil Yeah, they're always saying Tylenol is kind of like the safest option whenever anything is... I thought it was like Motrin. Motrin doesn't work for me.

Motrin is like the JCPenney of Advil. I know. I feel the same way. Sorry. Like, oh, Motrin's still here? I really like, I always remember when I was, obviously I went to the nurse

about 16 times a day. Yeah. And she would always offer me Motrin. I was like, Nurse Penny, like... Jesus Christ, Penny. I need the harder shit, Penny.

This shit doesn't do it for me anymore, Penny. Please. I need Tylenol. Like, at the bare minimum, Tylenol. I'm asking you for Advil. I will reluctantly accept a Tylenol. I'll just tell everyone this little tidbit, like kind of like a fun fact,

if you have to take pain medication for like several days in a row, you're supposed to switch off between Advil and Tylenol. Because one affects your... Some people might even take them at the same time. To be safe. Because they affect different things. Yeah.

You can take them at the same time. Of course you can. But if you take them a lot, it can affect your stomach lining. Advil itself affects your stomach lining. And then Tylenol affects your probably fucking some other shit. I do think, I'm not a doctor, but like known that Advil does affect the stomach lining. Yes. Which is why you shouldn't take out an empty stomach.

Healthiest guy I knew from college, he was a swimmer and so he was always sore. He always had doms. Yeah. And he was swimming every single day. You're so welcome. And it's a new year. I'm just, to be honest. When we get to our ins and outs, you'll know why I'm just adopting these things that make my life smoother. Sure.

Everyone's life smoother. I don't want to be oppositional anymore for views. Were you oppositional for views? I think sometimes in order to have a conversation, you just like have to disagree for the plot. Okay. And I'm not saying play devil's advocate. I'm saying, I don't think so. You know, and I do think so.

I do think so. Like, I agree with you. In fact, if you were opposite. if you were arguing the other thing, I would say the other. Well, how about you say I agree, but I'm going to play devil's advocate. I don't like, for some reason. Also, I don't even need you to do that also. Okay.

What was I even damn talking about with my fat ass over here? Sorry, I cut your fat ass off. Advil? Dom's the swimmer. The guy, yeah. He was the healthiest dude. I've ever, like 0% body fat, just like a fish. And he was sore all the time, so he would take Advil all the time.

Literally destroyed his stomach lining every time he ate. like an extriciating pain. That's, and he's obviously, he's not even enjoying his food, he's like chicken and rice. That sucks.

You're gonna be in pain. Yeah. Have a donut. Yeah. I think the coolest thing I saw recently is that like 12 donuts. You can eat like 12 glazed donuts and it's like one diet Coke

in terms of like sugar intake. There's no way. I don't make the facts. Actually, I do make a lot of facts. 12 glazed donuts? Um, Izzy,

can we look at the graphic one more time? How many glazed donuts to one Coke? The number of glazed donuts to one Coke? number of glazed donuts that contain the same amount of sugar as a bug depends on the type of donut. No shit. Three. I hate Google AI. But also, is it a munchkin?

Okay. Krispy cream glazed donut has 10 grams of sugar. This means sugar content in a Coke equals four crispy cream donuts. So that, like, I'd rather have four Krispy Kruen donuts than a Coke. But I'm never having those at the same time. This is kind of like a false comparison because I'm never like, should I have a Coke or should I have four crispy creams? Like those are different times of the day.

I've never seen you drink a Coke I wouldn't really every now and then if I'm on my like death bed or if I'm just feeling it I'll get a diet Coke but that was the tinks effect I never wanted to I never had a yearning for a diet Coke ever in my life until all these chikas were like

don't even talk to me until I've had my 18th Diet Coke of the day well I always and still do like I always wish that I liked soda like when I was a kid it felt like I was missing out on so much a birthday parties and even now when someone orders a diet coke it just looks so good and refreshing it just tastes yucky to me sometimes i'll have a diet coke and it burns i'm like that can't be good i hate those bubbles i know i love sparkling water i actually the reason i gave up soda originally is because i had a dare with someone when i was 12 that like i could go without soda longer than he could and then i found out he cheated he was sneaking sodas and so i said to prove him wrong i'm going to go

100 days without soda. And then for whatever reason, like, I literally was started to picture, like, you know, when they show you how soda's made and like the soft the fountains, the soft drink fountains, and it's like literally just like syrup, sugar syrup, and then like sparkling water, I was like, that's all I could taste when I would, when I had another one. I was like, I actually don't even want it anymore. Damn. Yeah. Yeah. How was your break? Oh my gosh. Thanks. It was really, really long. I feel like I was one of those people that experienced it as being like, okay, I'm like ready to go back and like get emails again.

I didn't get an email, which was for whatever reason like freaking me out because I think Q4 is always like boom, boom, boom, like I get to work, work, work. And I'll send you to go from that to just like cold turkey, no email, no Gmail. Papa's hungry. I need an email. I like literally needed an email. I signed up for alerts from like random websites so I could get the vibration. I get that. And it was at my parents' house for like eight days.

And then I was in Austin for New Year's, which was so fun. But really, nothing really went down. Like, I really have nothing to report. I don't think. That's fine. It was a blessing. You know, we, our fat asses love just like a chill break in our pajamas doing nothing. It was so chill, but it also was like, I, like, I'm, like, having a panic attack.

Like, I need some action. I need something to. go down. But it was great because I got to hang out with Mimi and I hang out with Max every single day 24-7. He was probably glued to you. Yeah. He's got like a nice little life down in Texas. He loves, he's got a big freaking yard that he runs around and Mimi takes him to go see the horses every day in this

dog park. Is Mimi living there now? Yeah, because she can't be in Idaho during the winter. It's gnarly. She's like, it's hard to shovel. Yeah. Anyhow Max one night We're out We're on the golf course And there's a bunch of deer

That come on the golf course There's probably 40 or 50 deer Big deer Deer are big People don't know that You think Bambi You think I can I can pick up Bambi

A whole Bambi in my arms Bambi was a baby Bambi was a foal I think that is what Yeah Baby deer No Col

That's a horse That's, yeah, it's a horse, thank you, is he? What is a baby deer? A fawn. A fawn. A fawn. Ain't no fawn's in my neck of the woods. It was like bucks.

It's these huge. And so we're walking and my dad always likes to be like, Max is fine off leash. I'm like, no. You don't know him. Dogs off leash just scare the shit out of me. Well, it's like... Not scare the shit out of me, but I'm just like,

how would it not run away? So, we turn around and walk back the other way, because my dad insisted he... And the deer were looking. It's like 40, 50 deer. And we walk back the other way. And then we turn it. because I heard rustling in the woods.

The deer were following us. Like 40 deer. And Max froze. And my mom was like, get behind a tree. Like, there's no survival instinct on this one. I'm not getting behind a tree. Have you seen a deer kick the shit out of someone before? They're like, they're not athletic.

They don't look athletic, but they... And I don't know what a hoof feels like to the sternum, but it's not good. Like, it's not going to feel good. And also, the bucks all have horns with, like, points. So I was kind of freaked out. Max, this one runs by Max. Max takes off with it. I'm like, come here.

No. Takes off neck and neck with this steer like on its ankle. They run as far as I could see. Air tag your dogs. I followed him. He was two miles away. Holy shit. I found him half an hour later covered in mud.

I don't know what happened. His fat ass needs to be on a leash. His fat ass is now leash bound. Yeah. That's a fat ass that needs to be on a leash. He's leash bound. It was so scary because I was like, it's Texas. Like someone might be like more protective of those deer than my dog.

I might just like shoot my dog, you know? Yeah. Yeah, that scares me. I was so freaked out. Yeah, it's like a retirement neighborhood. They're all so old and have guns just like in all of their pockets probably. I guess like the only thing I really did besides going the Palisades hike, that is not probably completely burnt to the ground the day before that happened.

was I went to Cirque Day Saleh. Wait, your stories were so funny. Wait, no one laughed at all, so I deleted all of them. Connor, trust yourself. I know. But I went to Cirque Day Saleh, so basically, like, when I got home from Texas, I was walking, and my neighbors that I haven't met were, like, out on their back patio, and they were all drinking. I'm doing dry January again to no one's surprise.

It's actually been a lovely dry January. I feel like good. which I've never felt after tri-January before. I'm always like, I'm always like grumpy, alcoholic old man. But I walked by my neighbors and I'm like, hell, like, whatever. Like, you don't live here.

And they were like, oh, yeah, we just moved in, blah, blah, blah. They seemed cool, too. So I was like, over to friends of them. Young-ish, I probably 30. Are they together? It was like a group of them. There was like two people that lived there and then two people that I couldn't tell if they lived there,

didn't ask. And they were like, our new landlord gave us Cirque de Salé tickets. Do you want to go? I was like, yeah, New Leaf going with people to Cirque Day Salé. Whoa. And so I go with them and it was so much fun. Didn't know what Cirque Day Salé is.

Oh, it's a blast. When I was a little, I went. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. To me, I remember being like, this is a magic show. Because it's like, it's just like magical what these people can do with their fat asses. Their fat asses were flying. The tities were bouncing left to right.

Yes. That's an instance where it is a complete. access situation. There was no rules. There's no laws of gravity. Defying gravity. They were defying gravity. Yeah. And the weird part was like it was technically, I guess, a musical, but it felt like I was in the Sims. No one spoke English, really. It was like, and it was funky and it was fresh. And it was in a tent. It was pitch black and it was daytime when we went in. And it was so effing cool. It was the first time I've been to something like that and I was like, I had no thoughts. I was just like, and when you, when you, when you, walk out they all clapped for you to get from going i was like wow this is my chosen family wow brooke i might join the circus i was literally to say it sounds like you might join the circus i have no skills or anything but they could like i'll i'll walk the tightrope i could see you learn a juggle or something yeah i went to kuzza i went to kuzumel on on sunday that's so fun it was so damn it was so damn i'd love to go to something like that oh my gosh it was still up and running it was the last day damn i know it was

the coolest thing ever so the issue it the thing that you saw so i said like It was the night of the Golden Globes, and I posted on my story, I was like, the golden gloves were remarkable tonight. Here's some of the highlights that you didn't get to see from in person. And I said, like, here's a girl flying down, the, like, rope thing. And I was like, Nikki Glazer's entrance was impeccable. Yeah. At first I was like, huh, I didn't know who's at the Golden Globes. He's an angle that I didn't experience.

Literally some bitch's 40 feet in the air. It's not Nikki Glazer. It took me until the third story to be like, oh. No, Brooke. I don't think he's at the Golden Gloves. I even pulled out my fine. my friends, you got to turn your location on one of these days. It's on.

No, it's not. Brooke, it's on. Your location's never on. My ass has location on. It doesn't. Ever. Oh my God, your location's on. That's, don't try and gaslight me.

Your location's always off. Well, I got a new phone. I think it works now on this phone. But I had an amazing hat, but I posted it. I was like, oh yeah, Selena Gomez just mounted Benny Blanco on this unicycle. And everyone was like, what? I was like, you guys. What? And then at the last story slide, I said, thank you, Enron for my tickets.

Enron is like a debunked energy company that, like, I don't know what. That, see, to me, that I did think that was serious. I didn't know who they were. But I did think you were thanking them for the start to slay tickets. So I kind of, I knew it wasn't the gold glow. Like, everyone thought my story was serious. No, but. No, I knew it wasn't serious. The Enron I didn't get.

You are not alone. many, I think I had like two people being like, I'm crying. This is so funny. But most people were like, whoa, like I literally what you said, I didn't see this angle. And I'm like, there are three motherfuckers on a bike on a tightrope 80 feet in the air. And I said it was Jeff Bezos. Well, when we were at the, where did we go? The AMAs.

Pink was flying. Pink flies, though. Pink probably flies. Still, you just, you never know in Hollywood. Pink probably flies from her bed to her kitchen. Mm-hmm. Her fat ass cannot be tied down. Yeah.

Yeah. She's defined gravity. She should have played Elphaba. No. No. Um. Expedia and visit Scotland. Invite you to come experience the beauty that awaits in Scotland.

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See associate or Lowe's.com for details. Go ahead. I have a golden gloves. I knew you were going to talk about the golden gloves, so I want you to talk about the golden gloves. I feel like everything I just shared was just so okay, question mark. No. I had nothing.

I truly, truly nothing to. share from my break. This is what I'm about to share. Oh, I saw Beyonce. Sorry, I saw Beyonce too. Where? At the Texans game. Oh, that's great. And Post Malone and Shibuzzi. Do not understand the Shibuzzi hype and I'll leave it there. Thank you. You've glitter on your upper lip. It's from my mic from when I was Rudolph. Great. That was Rudolph. Um, okay, when I'm about to say, my heart is pounding and my, my palms are sweating. this was this was yeah this was really crazy and like this is a person that i don't typically

like to talk about on air because i always am scared that me talking about him is going to make its way across his when i say his i'm talking capital h his desk because he he this person is like a very private person who and i who i respect more than more than anything and i just wouldn't i just don't want to talk about him if he if he wouldn't like that and I don't want it to come across his desk. But I have to tell that. I have to share my story. Share it.

So it was the day of the Golden Globes. It was Sunday. And some friends and I wanted to go on a walk. And I was like, let's like walk around Beverly Hills. Because like it's the Golden Globes. Like everyone that is attending is probably around there. Like especially around the Beverly Hills Hotel. Like it'll be such a fun vibe.

Yeah. Like my fat ass might even want to walk into the Beverly Hills Hotel and see. You're allowed to. You're totally loud. The public place. Great place to eat. You could get a salad for only 55 USD. And just like it really is just, it really is one of my favorite places.

It is just stunning. It's kind of like like a whole ass vibe. It's almost a whole ass vibe. You know, it's always fun to stop by. So it's like, yeah, let's walk around. Let's walk around Beverly Hills. See what we find, whatever. Walking around Beverly Hills.

I'm like, what if we almost walked by? What if we almost walked into the Beverly Hills Hotel? And everyone was like, oh, yeah, that sounds fun. Let's do it. We walk into the Beverly Hills Hotel. We're walking in. I say, by the way, guys, like if we, you know, I don't know. If we see Andrew Garfield or something like that, just like, don't say anything.

Like, be cool. There was, like, something in my system that was like he's, like, I'm off to a fucking flame. I was like, my man's in there. Yeah. So it's like, be cool. So we walked down to the pool, which is like where the, like, cafe is that you can have lunch at. We go to the hostess and Brett, my friend Brett, goes yeah i mean yeah there's andrew and i was like i thought he was joking i didn't like even look

and marshall goes oh there he is my fat ass looks to the right i can't stress enough to you i was feet away from from that young man who and he was eating with some people that i was also like um luca guadonino i just realized i've never said his last name out loud and i don't know that's how you got it right but um i was just like okay um so then immediately i just turn around and i'm just like this you know that's it that's all i wanted like that that's all i could have ever asked for to just share the air and and so my friends were like let's you know let's eat here and so we put our names on the lid where you guys dressed right? I was in

leggings and a workout top which is fine. Like you can wear that but you know had I known? Ball gown ball gown. So The thing is you didn't know. I didn't I didn't but I didn't. You didn't

know and because of that you it was a positive experience you couldn't have known. No it was awesome because I didn't like really get the chance to psych myself out or anything. It wasn't like I wasn't there was no way that I was going to like go up to him and bother him so it was like I wasn't like in my head like oh my god what should I say I'm going to make a pull of myself it was

just like I'm just there yeah so we couldn't get we couldn't get seated for another hour so it's like that's great like I got my look in we walked out and then a half hour later I was like let's just go back and leave our tables ready because I was almost wanting to sit there with him for a little bit maybe. We went back. Our table was ready. And it was at that point where we were being seated. He said, like I could even hear him be like, all right, guys, I have to go. Because, you know, his fat ass has to get in glam. Yeah. He had to get his beard groomed. He'd get that beard groomed. He looked good. He looked awesome, which is like so insane that I got to see him right before he went and did the damn thing looking like that. But then he got up from the table. What we were,

walking to to the table next to him and what's crazy is like we were just like he just almost was like you know how you just like simply acknowledge people in a way like it's not i kind of forget i almost blacked out almost he was like a nod it was like a very like casual like i acknowledge that you are walking by me right now oh every all of us were looking at our feet but yeah so he walked right by and then we were seated everyone else at his table was still there his his empty chair was there and so I was seated like right next to his empty chair. Did you smell? He was in a graphic tea and jeans.

No, I did. And I was because I'm not like a fan. I'm not like I'm just a girl. And he's just a guy, you know? But it is so crazy when you see people that you're so fond of and you realize like that is a person with skin and organs. And it's just like a human being. Like he was like a normal height. It's crazy.

That's beautiful. Yeah, he's wearing sneakers. It's awesome. That's gorgeous. Yeah. I'm happy you have that experience. He is insane. So as of now, I have been in the same room as all of my celebrity crushes.

Yeah. He was the last one. That's incredible. Yeah. What a way to start 2025. What a way to start 2025. Maybe that's a sign of something. But Connor, I can't stress enough.

Like, it was like a moth to a flame. I knew he was going to be there. That's. And I'm not soccer way. And it's just like. My heart's calling out to another heart. He nodded at you. In a way.

It wasn't like a physical nod. It was like, I can't explain it. I can explain it. I can explain it. I can explain it. I can explain it. I can explain it.

Like when someone rescues like an owl and they're like, we let it go and it stopped at like the edge of the forest and like looked back and like I could just feel that it was saying thank you. Yeah. I felt him. I felt an acknowledgement and the energy in the air. it was a nod that had no movement. He looked like I'm not even like he looked at like it's we were this see this this this

yeah yeah wow. It was really crazy. I'm going to get our resolutions that we wrote last year and go through. Oh yeah. Happy 2025. While you're getting those, I'm just going to talk about how many people got engaged on my Instagram over the break. It was every single person I've ever met got engaged and for some reason it didn't affect.

You know, I'm in my I'm in my pajamas. at my parents. I was just like sitting there, like, sitting crisscross applesauce as an adult man being like, oh my gosh, another one. That's great. And then Dua Lepa gets engaged. And like, it's one thing for everyone I've ever met in high school to get engaged. But Dua Lepa to get engaged over the holidays was an active terrorism.

And then to just like post it? What, you're proud of it and you're rubbing it in right now? Did she post? She posted out. And the first picture was her and, you know what, I can't even be mad because it's so nice to see two gorgeous celebrities find each other for the first time in a long time. I think hot people rarely find each other. It seems like they're drawn to the other side of the spectrum. I'm not seeing an engagement post. Well, it's a picture of her and him after the day after they were reportedly engaged. So yeah. And what are you going to do? She is so gorgeous. She's, she's, urethro.

Urethroal. So scary. Urethriol. How old is she? 29. I'm obsessed with Googling how old people are now. Oh wait, she's 28. Guess.

Oh, wait, I'm guessing. But when was she born? Probably 28 years ago. I really like have to see like to the date how old people are now. I bet in. Duolipa age. I bet she was born in Ogg. 29, 29.

Okay. Thank God. August 20. No, no, no. I didn't know that. That was weird. I agree that was weird. Did not know that.

I found out someone that, like, I thought was my age recently. It was, like, 22. It's getting to the point where it's like, I have no idea how old people are. No, no idea. Also, when I find out, like, a quarterback in the NFL is, like, 26. I'm like, oh. Oh. I really.

It is horrible that people are. Oh, my God. Okay, let's get to this. You start looking at bridges, like, I should jump off that. All right. Okay. Happy New Year, you guys. I hope everyone had.

Good resolutions. Let's do our new, let's write down some new resolutions after. Okay. You're going to hand me. Yeah. Okay. Do you want me to read them or I'm going to hand them to you?

Wait, are you going to read off all of them? Yeah. Or you want me to read off yours. I'll read off. No. Or if you want, do you want that? I don't know. You can read them off.

No, do you want mine? Oh my God, wait. What? Okay. I'm just going to read them. Or do you want to read them? I'm scared of, yeah. No, go ahead.

Read them. These are our resolutions that we put in a box if you're listening. Right off the bat. let's get this out of the way. I will go on one date. That was mine. Didn't do it. Get that out of the way.

Well, you probably put it back in the box. Oh, yeah. If you want to go on a day. I am going to do that this year. Cool. Obviously. You said,

I'm going to have a comedy special. Oh. And a bigger comedy tour. You did that. Yeah. I want to catch that one on fire because what was I thinking that I would have a comedy special right now? You probably will shortly.

You also said I'm going to be a comedy show. on TV. Was I on TV at all? I was on the news. Perfect. You were on TV then. Okay. I was on the news because my

This is me. I said I'll move to a place I love. I guess that counts. It does count. I did this. I moved to a place that I loved. That's great. Fabulous.

That's good. This is also me. Someone will be obsessed with me. Yeah, that happened and it actually was I was actually middleman in that. And I'll leave it directly there. My cat, I'm thinking. Oh.

Well, that's not someone. That's a something. I wouldn't say something. I guess he is a living being is obsessed with me. But I wouldn't say someone. Yeah. That feels like a person. Some being is obsessed with me.

So it's close enough. Surely. Okay. Yeah. Yes. But also there is a person at least one. All right. This says people will like obsessed.

Wow. That's crazy that was only a year. Whoa. And they did. They did. I saw a TikTok. fuck and someone had a tombstone. I know.

With obsessor written on it. I'll be completely ripped and healthy. All right. Rip that to shreds. All right. No way. Actually, keep that. You are.

You want me to keep it in. I'm healthy. You are. How about me knowing for, I'm saying I'm healthy, me knowing for a fact because I went in and got blood tests. And they were like, get the fuck out of this office.

You are 100%. Every organ is working perfectly. Your blood test couldn't be more normal. I was like, run those tests again, doctor. Something can't something has to be off. Nope, you are healthy. Oh my gosh. That just goes to show how much mental stress we just put ourselves under thinking we must have cancer.

Yeah. You know? Anxiety is like so powerful. It's like chill out. Anyways. You wrote something so good will happen. I guess I'll just put that one back in the box. You don't feel like something so good happened?

I don't know. I guess it's all perspective. Yeah. This is empty. Did I write this? Like, we don't. did a six month ago check in or something. Yeah.

This says a publishing house I love will publish my book, which has... But that doesn't really count because that was like recent-ish. Oh. Boob. Do you want me to read the... Sure. You said, I'll find the perfect NYC apartment and everything will work out with the podcast. Yeah, that's true.

I am moving to New York City next month. Um, Woohoo. Nothing is going on at all with our podcasts or with our friendship or with it. Like, we are good. We are good. We are so good. Um, I, it's just, I wanted to change scenery.

Been here for a while. And that's it. And Max, to answer the Max questions. He's with his grandparents because I'm going back on tour and more to come there. Not to be like someone who's excited to announce, but like I just can't say it yet because it's not my place to announce. So there's something else coming up. Yeah.

Um, But that is exciting. And it'll be really fun and watch the space. And then we'll have a place to record in New York City, literally. And we will figure out what to do with the podcast shortly. Yeah, I mean, it's. But it will be in action as usual. Yeah, we have everything is moving forward as it always happens.

Nothing will change. I'm really pissed off about being ripped. Like I really should be ripped right now. Oh, also if any like, Real estate moguls are listening to the podcast and you have just like randomly like an open two bedroom apartment and it's got like a fireplace maybe like a hot tub. Like I would totally take it off your hands. If it's burning a hole in your pocket, I'll manage the property for you. Don't worry.

He already is on the plane a lot. He'll be coming back here to see us. Tons. Yeah. I have this weird feeling and like I'm going to just say to the manifestation space that I'm going to get like some. job in Los Angeles, the month that I, like the first couple of weeks that's going to make me come back. It might be worth exploring bicostiality.

I've always had an open mind, Brooke. I know. I've never, yep, I don't like to put a label on that. But bicotiality might be it. Tri-coastiality might even be it. Mm-hmm. I could see that for you. Because I might move to, I might have a place in Texas.

I was about to say I could see you being tri-coastal Austin, L.A. Yeah. And I might need to live down on the Gulf of America. Yeah, I could see that for you. Trump is naming the Gulf of Mexico Gulf of America. Oh, pretty. And he's in talks to to buy Greenland

as well as Canada. And he's being completely serious. And the funniest thing about the Greenland purchase, I went to a deep dive on Twitter is that everyone thinks he's buying it because he thinks it's like this massive piece of land, but it's obscured because of some

something that when they print the globe, it stretches it. But when they put it flat, they didn't adjust for like the visual stretching. So it's really like way smaller. And everyone's saying like he doesn't realize that. Why do we need? Oh, I guess Greenland's pretty close to Russia.

I'm done talking about that. I do love the new feature on Twitter where you can use that AI thing when I don't understand what they're talking about. I click it and then you click the AI thing and it like explains it. One good thing. There, Elon.

I'll give you one good thing about Twitter. I actually didn't even know about that feature. I'll show you how to use it because I just figured out how to use it like two days ago. But I'll just mansplain it to you when we stopped recording. Okay, perfect. Can we really quickly do our ins and outs and predictions?

That's the biggest thing that I wanted to do. I know, me too. Oh my gosh, my dad's calling me. Can I really quickly answer? He's worried about the fuckers. Yeah, of course. Hello. It's good.

I'm going to put you on speaker because we are on the podcast. You're on the podcast, father. Oh, that's awesome. Yeah. What? How much money do I get? Oh, we'll have to, we'll be in touch with your people. We are not evacuating.

It's over in Santa Monica, and I think they're barely evacuating Santa Monica for now. Yeah. So I think we're good. Knock on wood. Good, because your podcast is still going. That's all we need is the podcast. Well, you and the million other people listening. Yes.

Aw. Exactly. I'll text you after. Okay. All right. Love you. Bye. Yeah. Inns and out. That's a sweetheart. Prediction. All right. Ready?

I only have two predictions. I'm not good at that. I'm not either. I have one. How about you share it? I just want to point out, remember a year ago I said, I think Instagram's going to expand their pictures to have Facebook photo album style. Oh, yeah. You totally got that right. that and it was like not even kind of a thing yet yeah i am so freaking over people posting 20 photos now i just did it sorry i think year end is the exception like that's fine but people go do like a staycation and they post 20 photos i guess let people enjoy themselves like shut up okay yeah i'm not gonna

scroll through it and like that's just like enjoy your enjoy your enjoy your giant dump like who am i take that from you. Queen Latifah Come Back is my first one. Oh, that's a good one. Yeah. Mine is that there will be another singing show like Glee. And that my second one is that Justin Baldoni and Army Hammer were going to start a podcast. Wow.

About like men being canceled in Hollywood unjustly, quote unquote. Oh my gosh. The new boys on the block. Like literal boys on the block. Wow. And if they don't start a podcast, there will be a collaboration between those two men.

Don't get mad at me. I literally only have the Queen Latifah prediction. Oh, that's my only two. I have a ton of ins and outs. We can do more predictions as we move forward

in the years as well. Like maybe there will be more. But let's do ins and outs. Okay. Okay. Do you want to start? Inns? Musical theater.

I think Wicked is really like making that hopefully like mainstream and Cirque de Soleil too almost yeah women and comedy oh wait just do one I'll do sorry you're doing sorry so in musical theater out tagging people on the edge of your story I want to see who that is don't be evil tag in the middle in women in comedy out hand dryers and bathrooms too loud 150% sprays water everywhere I hate that you don't like that okay use your pants In cats Out

ICloud links Yes Yes Good rid of it Or make them work Make them work I want to open it Or make them work

Wait I'm only sending 11 pictures How about make them work? Make it work I wanted to work Yep In playing the wicked soundtrack at bars Out

Stairs I don't know I don't have a solution for that Just figure it out In? Hot coffee. Out? I don't know what I meant by this.

Restaurants that are confusing. Okay, I'm just going to skip that. Out. Blaming things on ADHD. Get a prescription. Okay. Okay. I've never been like I'm crippled by ADHD.

I'm just like, yeah, like I forgot and I lost my wallet in my apartment. That's 10 square feet. Sue me. I know. In? cups of soup for any meal and also snacks. Aligned. Out, do a leap of ruining my holidays by getting engaged.

In clogs. You're going to hate that one. I love clogs. Really? Yeah, I'm an outspoken clogger. I'm about to get a pair of like black clogs. Like platform mules almost, I think. Ooh, platform mules.

You like that? I never pegged you as a platform mule. Am I guess a platform? Out the hand sanitizer that smells like 2020. It makes me gag. Yeah. In, a greater understanding that reading is subjective. In, saying, did you guys feel that randomly?

That's funny. In, stuffed animals. In, finding clues. In, saying A, after every sentence you don't know how to respond to. N, Thursdays. In, changing the typical inflection of words. like hot tub and stuff like that. Yeah, and Red Bull.

Red Bull. For wheeler. For loco. And transition lenses. Really? Yeah, I don't want to, I don't need two pairs of glasses. Yeah. Out.

Designer bags with key chains. On the other hand, in pocket knives. Out. Patchwork tattoos. Sorry, I also have them, so sorry. And hide and seek. That was all I had for the end and outs. I have a couple more ins, and I'll just say them in row.

And table topping people for fun, like casual, like in the grass, don't do it on concrete. And dog names for babies, like Rover. Okay. And Duke. In saying, no, you're right. Instead of disagreeing. Just like, yeah. No, you're right.

And making a new laugh. Like, just pick a new laugh. It's so fun. and in double texting. Yeah, agree. Leave your pride at the door. Double text. I was really aligned with all of yours.

Me? I was feeling the same way about yours. Because musicals in bars, I was really against. I don't know what happened to me. Something shifted. Then I was like, if I know it also. Yeah, people really like. I would love to know the song.

But one of the most fun nights at a bar I've ever had in my life, seriously, was when I was in Aspen and Matt King and T. And Elycia and that whole group were also in Aspen. And we went to the. bar and we took over the jukebox and we played all songs we knew every song every word to and we screaming in a table i just can look it's killing me and it was so so much fun yeah so yeah i think that and it makes some come right on me i mean camaraderie inside hey hey all right well that's about it for the main and much more to discuss in the bonus yes yeah well well well we

we have one more thing. Take it away. Earlier in the year, I don't even remember what month I went out to NYC, baby. And I was, Serena Breer, who is a friend of ours. She made an audio book and she wrote it. And she asked me to be one of the characters in the book, one of the main characters, one of the male leads. So I might say, voice.

I voiced this man. and it's available to read now. It's called That Friend by Sabrina Breer. It's an audiobook. And we have a snippet here that I don't really know if I'm going to be able to hear. It's my first time hearing yet. I'm so excited.

Okay. I'm going to clog my ears. But here it is. No, I guess I'll just man. I'll just nut up and listen to it, honestly. Nut up. I have everything under control. Besides, this is why I have my producer.

You know you can call him Jack, right? We all went to high school together. Alice, I'm an entrepreneur now. Okay, formalities matter. Speak of the freaking devil. Here he comes. Hello, Jack. Welcome to the studio.

Make yourself at home. Oh, handshake. Okay. Word. What up, Sabrina? Those stairs are pretty wild, huh? You get used to them. You really don't.

Hey, Jack, I'm just going to give you a hug like a normal person. What up, Alice? How you been? Good. You look older. For sure. I'm definitely older since high school. How did you guys?

I felt so good. I feel like I'm blushing, but I think I just turned more white. No. So it's really good. It's a great storyline. It's like, you know, she does that all the characters, that friend who. Yes. So she like wrote this whole book.

Is it on Audible? I think it should be. We'll confirm. Look it up. That friend. by Sabrina Breer. I love it, you guys. I'm sure it's in her bio too to click it.

So check it out. And thank you guys for listening. We have exciting guests coming on that everyone will love and adore in the next couple weeks. So we'll see you then. Yeah, I agree. Could you get a piercing like through your Achilles tendon or now? Let's go to the bonus.

Okay. Bye guys. That'd be a good place for your piercing. I don't agree. This week on Close Friends. We brought in this guy with a ton of reptiles to convince you not to do drugs. I was like, he's full-blown.

I promise you're going to smoke crack tonight. Life is what happens when you have your eyes closed. My lips like sugar. My candy's got you sprung. Officer cock. Officer cock and balls here. Something very strange is afoot with these cashews. They don't taste like any cashew I've ever met.

Sign up on TMG Studios.tv to watch a full bonus episode. I knew about investing, but I really didn't know how to go about it. Meet Corey, a wealthfront client. With Wealthfront, it could put money in, and it would automatically distribute it into a diversified portfolio. Then it starts to compound. The compounding compounds on the compounding.

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