Brooke and Connor Make A Podcast - You’re Blocked ft. Victoria Paris

Episode Date: August 4, 2022

Ad Free Episodes: https://tmgstudios.tv  Victoria Paris is here! This week Brooke and Connor welcome Victoria to the podcast to chat about the app BeReal, rich people living in LA, and their shared experiences on social media. Highlights Channel: https://www.youtube.com/c/BrookeAndConnorHighlights  Email us at [e-mail] !! If you listen on Apple Podcasts, go to: https://apple.co/bandc Our listeners get 10% off their first month at https://betterhelp.com/bandc  Go to https://zocdoc.com/bandc and download the Zocdoc app for FREE B+C IG: https://www.instagram.com/bncmap/ B+C Twitter: https://twitter.com/bncmap TMG Studios YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/tinymeatgang TMG Studios IG: https://www.instagram.com/realtmgstudios/ TMG Studios Twitter: https://twitter.com/realtmgstudios BROOKE https://www.instagram.com/brookeaverick https://twitter.com/ladyefron https://www.tiktok.com/@ladyefron  CONNOR https://www.instagram.com/fibula/ https://twitter.com/fibulaa https://www.tiktok.com/@fibulaa Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I forgot the last thing about that premiere is that you wanted to talk to Dylan Spouse. Yeah, of course I did. I love the Spouse twins. I know. And Conner's friends with Dylan and he refuses to introduce me. Wait, I feel like you're the intro with everybody between y'all and this is the hard no. Connor Kate keeps me from a few select people. Really? It's really, really good. Why?

What's the origin? What? Like you're embarrassed? She's making up a narrative. No, I'm not. Have you introduced me to Dylan Sprouse? Do you want Dylan all to yourself? I didn't.

I don't want to say this. You were speaking to him. Because. And I was there. I'm clenching my fruit roll up right now in anger. It's like sweating into your palm. Every time. This has happened multiple times.

I just want to say hi. Then go say hi. Introduce me. No. I didn't want to. I don't want to go up as a fan. I wasn't there to socialize. I didn't want to talk to anyone.

But you were talking to him. Oh, but that's my friend. So? Which one's dating the model? Dylan. Dylan. And she was there too. I just want to say hi.

Hello. everyone welcome back that felt really icky i know it's ikey vicky you're so icky just the son of me and imagine me so so so so sticky speaking of vicky victoria paris is here today you know her you love her we're so lucky to have her thanks for coming seriously vicky did not sit right with me do people ever call you vicky sorry no no my brother's zone with a nickname and i'm the one with the full name i'm like you have to say it all the way through victoria yeah yeah thanks for having me you guys. Thank you so much for coming. Yeah. Long time coming. Such fans of you. So you.

Stans. Stans. Right back out. Yeah. Thank you. You are moving out here, right? Yes. Yes. You've been based in New York as long as I've known you. We obviously go way back, a first time meeting in person today. Yeah. Well, you started in New York in one apartment. I feel like your apartment is a lot of your content. Yeah. So I've lived in two apartments now on TikTok. I was in like a one-bed flex, my college apartment. And then once I started doing TikTok full-time, I moved into this huge studio in Tribeca. And I've been in that sense. And it's just like the most insanely well-decorated. I'm so obsessed with your apartment. And I'm like really stressed about you moving here.

Like how are you going to get everything here? Are you going to get everything here? What are you doing? I mean like, you know, I'm doing like the cliche, corny influence or shit. I'm partnering with roadway movers. I'm getting that free move. Like how am I. moving here. Like, come on. But are you bringing

everything? Okay, so I'm keeping my place. I renew my lease. Oh, you're going to be bi-coastal. Yeah, but I'm subleasing it to my friend part-time so that I can come whenever I want and whatever. But she's going to like furnish it, so I'm not going to leave a ton there. And it's free for me to move, so I not move everything.

My last apartment was furnished by anthropology, and this new place is going to be furnished by urban. Oh, my gosh. I was going to say, dead ass, I promise you, there's no way for me to prove it, but I was going to say your apartment seems like the love child. of an anthropology. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And is the orange couch coming? Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. That is all the matter. I bought that bad boy. Good. I love that. And my dining room table. Yeah.

Yeah. Your wall. Do you need your wall here? No. And my best friend's like, that thing is ugly as fuck. I'm taking it down. No, I love your wall.

I love it too. She's like, I'm not sleeping in a Burger King crown though. And I was like, I feel like you really have brought back color. Because I feel like a lot of people's taste recently has just been like, The cloud couch The cloud couch minimalist

Yeah And like I really appreciate This is the color of my kitchen cabinets I love that Like I just People hated that Yeah no I love it And the tiles too

I mean you've really inspired me Yay Yeah books got a serious Kink for the love Or the I Carly set I do No way I do

I do It's fine But when I was like Trying to decorate it I was like Connor Can you help me Because I'm not very good at it And he has a better

eye than me and he hated everything because it was like colorful and like furry and like leather and then I moved forward with not asking him when we were on zoom I was like why is your house loki nice like put together I was like what the I was like reading the painting in the background it was like these guys with the sign that says I want beer and I was like oh and the podcast is at 9 a.m. I was like oh they have their lives together. No. Connor's house is like very like clean and white. Yeah. I like white because I can tell when there's there's like a bug. Oh, fat.

You know what I mean? Yeah. Trust me, I can tell. I can tell that there's a fly infestation in my kitchen, regardless of the color. I somehow, I've gotten through a whole year of my apartment. I've not had a single bug in my apartment. Are you like afraid of bugs? No, it's more like when I lay in my bed at night and then start thinking I'm like,

there's probably a bug in here. And I don't know why it would need to go into my eye or my ear hole when I'm asleep. But I do have that feeling that I have trouble actually going. my eggs in your brain and stuff. Yeah, I do have that fear. I don't think it's irrational. Did you see the TikTok? Talk about the girl.

She came home for vacation and she had this worm in her leg and she like showed her sister and she's like, look at this worm in my leg. And her sister's like, yo, healthcare is free here. Like go get that checked out. And she's like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And a few weeks go by and she's like, look, it moved. It's here now. And she's like, and there's a second one.

And so she finally goes to the doctor. And the doctor's like, yeah, we could only get one out. And the other one migrated somewhere else in your body and we don't know where it is. My God. I could never just accept. accept that and just be like a worm. No, I would be like staking out in the ER. I actually don't even.

I would cut off the whole leg. Yeah. 100%. I'd say give me a ballpark where this worm is. Let's amputate today. I'll write a book. Cartwood out right now. No, I'll get the leg off.

I'll write a book about life with one leg. That's tough. That's tough. One leg and no worms. Um, a can't do worms. This is the second time worms have come up on our podcast. I think for sure I, even the word worm that has, has anything. I like earthworms. Oh no.

Oh, Jesus. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. No, play it. They don't show anything. Oh. She just talks, and her accent is so cute. I always say, oh, are you and your siblings alike? Like, do you get on?

Let me tell you something about my sister, okay? She has a worm in her leg. This bitch travels a lot, and about four months ago, she noticed like a worm-shaped object in her upper thigh and thought, huh, that looks like a worm. Now, she's better than me, because if I had noticed any one- better than me too. You know what this reminds me of?

You know what this reminds me of? You know when someone would stab you in elementary school and there would be the little piece of lead? Oh, I still have a little piece of lead in their body. Yes. Is that just like we're accepting? We're just accepting it, like the lead. Yeah. Another thing about you, Victoria, that I love, you don't use a laptop.

This came to our attention yesterday when we were zooming. Yeah. I like didn't have a laptop in high school. I think because my parents wouldn't buy me one And so I was like, yeah, like A recurring theme in my life is needing to be different And I was like, yeah, fuck everybody with laptops Like I don't need a laptop

Like they're so extra, it's just a big iPhone And then I kind of like just started doing everything on my phone Like even in high school when I had the type of papers I do Google Docs on my phone right before class Because I was so last minute with everything And then that kind of transferred into college Because I never really onboarded using a laptop And then I graduated from college

And I'm like now I just feel like free Where did you write your essays? Google Docs my phone. Yeah, you can form out it all in there. You just typed the whole essay on there? Yeah, and you can like air drop. And I would sit like outside of class because I'd always do the kid who did homework

right before the teachers took it. So I'd sit right outside of class and be like, did you take your notes in college on paper? I did not take any notes. You didn't take any notes. No. I mean, I went to like a very easy college. Uh-huh.

Whoa. Yeah, I couldn't do it. I don't even check my email on my phone. What about when you're like in bed and you need multiple devices, like one for like Netflix watching and one for like playing. a game or something. That's not your lifestyle. Again, Picme Behavior. I have not watched TV in a minute. Yeah. I feel like because I'm on my phone so much for work, it kind of like turns me off to

watching anything. What do you do? Yeah, I was going to say, what do you do? Do you draw? Do you doodle? I scroll through TikTok. I answer emails. I text my friends. I FaceTime a lot. I'm on Instagram. I don't really use Twitter that much, but I mean, my girlfriend's trying to get me to read because she's a big reader. We always are doing like wholesome crafts and like... Are you on book talk at all? Like the smut side of it. Yeah, I can't get off. Or they're like spicy like porn talk and I'm like, okay, should I read this?

And I read the synopsis and I'm like, okay, I'm fine. I'm on there and I've recently picked something up. Well, not really. Do you know Colleen Hoover? I've heard. She's like the main author that's on book talk. And I started not to be one of those girls that's like, I knew her before all of you. But I genuinely swear to God, knew her when her first book came out.

And I was reading them in high school and I felt like not guilty, but I was like, why is, like, no one else? Why is everyone pretending to read like the bell jar? Like just like, like, be interested in this, like, six. Twenty-six. Twenty-five. Okay, 23. Really? Yeah.

Wow. I feel so old recently. I'm like, what was I reading in high school? Like the Hunger Games. Yeah. Or maybe middle school. Yeah. I'm glad you brought that out.

Maze Runner. Did you guys have to do like a certain number of books and take a quiz on them at the end of the books in school? in middle school So we had it all through until I graduated high school It's called AR points And it was accelerated reader points Were you in private school?

No Okay, that's surprising Yeah, oh Is it because of my The look? I don't know, it was more so Your house, your house gave like My house probably gives

Well, it's probably something That could be diagnosed Just like Well, where was the public tool? Like, where was it? It was in like Houston, Texas. Okay, okay, okay, okay. Anyways, so we had these books,

and we had to read a certain amount of books. And I'm a big, that's why I'm the biggest advocate of judging books by their covers. And in all facets, because there's a lot of truth to that. And I picked up Hunger Games because I thought the cover art looked cool. It was like hunting and people fighting to death. Big, toxic masculinity stuff. Well, it just looked cool, but there was like this, like,

hero trope about the whole thing. And then four years later, it got super famous. But I had to read it. You were saying you read it before. Because I picked it up because it looked cool. And, you know, that was that. I love those Colleen Hoover books, but I'm starting to feel really bad.

Because when I was reading them in high school, it would be like, wow, I'm going to have this one day. These guys are so old. They're like 23, 24. And I'm going to have this romance. And now I'm like reading about younger people than me that are like getting married and just like being in love. So that's tough.

But then they just get divorced. I have friends who they got married and they're getting divorced already. I was like, that was real quick. That was so fast. Well, you got to knock out your first divorce early. Yeah. Third time's a charm. Third time is a charm.

Divorce is a part of life. The Catholic Church disagrees. Yeah, I think most churches probably disagree. There's no modern church that is built on divorce. I think you can be Jewish and get divorced. I know my parents are. I can vouch for them. What?

Is it reform? Reform. What are the? Reformation? I love the The three branches of Judaism. Thanks for asking Victoria. My dad's Jewish, but I don't know anything about it.

Reform is just like, I feel like the secular version. What is secular? Like non- I guess non-religious. Okay. Non-confrontation. Non-denominational.

No, no. Non-denominational. It's just like no. Passive aggressive. There's a passive-aggressive branch. Secular. There's a non-confrontational branch. Denoting attitudes, activities.

The other day I used neurotic wrong and I almost made my girlfriend cry. I was like, you're being neurotic right now. And she's like, do you know what that means? And I'm like, yeah, thorough. And she was like, no, that's not what it means. And I was like, oh, I'm so sorry. Did you mean like anal?

Yeah, like, just like she reads the label, top to bottom. She reads emails like all the way through. And I'm like, yeah, you're neurotic in that way. Thoreau. Yeah. Well, there's a little p. She was like, no, neurotic's like super negative. Oh, I don't think.

I think it can be like. She's like, it's a huge insult. And I was like, I just met thorough. Oh, yeah. I don't think it's a huge insults. Speaking of your girlfriend, you met her on Be Real. Yeah. Wait, what?

Give us a little bit more of that. So I was still dating my ex at the time. My ex-girlfriend, my first girlfriend. And I had, Be Real, I had like 10 friends on there at the time. And it suggests people to add. And like nobody had known about my account at that time. And so I guess like she has a bunch of mutual friends with my ex's mutual friends and my mutual friends. and so it suggested her to add me

and she added me and I was like who's this person because you know when like you have a big Instagram or TikTok you don't really keep track of who follows you and I was like so I looked her up and I was like damn this girl's hot I turned to my ex and I was like this girl was really hot and she was like yeah she is and then we started like following each other and be real my last relationship ended like a month went by we started talking

and that's how it happened is your ex like phased by that no oh that's good yeah I don't know We don't really talk. I guess that makes sense. Yeah, yeah. I don't know.

Like, that was like a messy relationship. So, yeah. That's genuinely like on par to me, like being like, yeah, I met my girlfriend on Trevago. Yeah, I was just scrolling on Instacart and I met the love of my life. I made a video about it and all these comments were like, yeah, like my dad met his wife on like eBay. And they're like, I met my girlfriend on Airbnb. Like she was my host and all these people like coming up. We have to branch out.

Ryan is not cutting it anymore. It's not. There's something that's like an active turnoff about, for me now, about like a guy being on a dating app. I'm like, why are you so desperate? You as a man on Bumble. Yeah. Like I'm there too, but like you really, like I know how desperate I am to be here.

Like I don't want you. I don't want you to match that energy. What if you see them on two platforms though? I've seen that before where you see them on Bumble and Tinder. It's right for me out. Like I'm there too. But like you don't, you shouldn't be. Like it's giving me the egg.

Yeah, fully. Yeah, just because, like, I know the place I have to be in to be on all of those apps at once. So to imagine a man in that state, tough to process. I think if we're going to get our screen time up that much, sometimes it's just like another, it's just another app. I know, just another game. Like, it's like a scrolling game. They did gamify it. That's the whole, that's the whole reason that they have users every day because if they say there's this game that they play.

They should add a more gaming feature. You might miss out on the love of your life. I mean, isn't dating? Dating is like a game to get married, though, like the angle. is one thing, but 99.99% of the times it's not gonna work out. Interesting take. Do you date to get married? Yeah, I'm so over dating.

I feel like I've just like, I've been ran through it throughout my life and like a train has been run on me. And so now I'm just like, I'm so easy. Like I don't go out. I don't like really party like that. I'm like I need like my wifey or my husband or whatever and I just want to like settle down

in my Topanga house and fuck off. I'm really excited to see your Topanga House journey. Yeah, if you have to Come, you'll have to come. I want to. I would love to. I'm looking at that thing. I don't even know where Topanga is.

Bro. Okay. Have you been an O-Hai? Uh-uh. I literally haven't been out of L. It's like, oh-high vibes. Like, um, I'm trying to think. Have you been to Chimha?

I've been to Ohio. Okay. And I know it's like, isn't, I don't know where Tupanga is exactly. Right before Malibu on the PCA. Oh, wow. You go 20 minutes into the canyon. There's like no service. There's one road that goes through it.

And a lot of people don't want to live there because there's fire, like the fires all in the Valley, right? Isn't the valley the other way? There's like a valley before Malibu. Oh, it's a valley? It's like, you know, let's pull it up. Oh. Their canyon.

Uh-huh. Yeah. Like kind of near Calabas. So you drive up, up, up. It's right. Yeah, yeah. So once you, when you enter, it's right before Malibu. When you exit, it's into calabasasas.

That's awesome. I agree. That's, it's so funny. Like, oh my God. Wait, funny story. So I'm like, go to rent this place. And she's like, yeah, like, you know, Tepengans getting really hip. Like, this pop star lives next door.

And I'm like, oh, okay. And she's like, I'll show you the house. Like maybe, because I'm looking to buy, but it's really hard to buy there unless you live there. I get like some off market deal because it's such a small community. And she's like, yeah, like, I'll show you the house. Like I think it could be like something you're looking for a longer term. And I'm like, so who's like, oh, his name's Steve. I'm like Steve.

I'm like, Harvey. No, she's like Steve Lacey. And I was like, oh, no way. Not just called Steve Lacey a pop star. And I was like, oh, right, I'll take it. I'll take, I'll take the house. I have like a horrible question. You know, I bite my tongue.

Oh, yeah, I do know who that is. So what would you consider him? Dive in. Just like a music and artist? Yeah, yeah. Okay. He's an artist for sure. You know, it's so funny, I was at my buddy's place in the hills and I peed.

We were like having dinner. I like peeing outside. It's nice. That's why I like it here. In New York, you're like cooped up. I need to be outside. Sometimes it's, it's, it's. It's really grounding to just be in the ground.

Stream directly to Mama Earth. Into the earth. So I'm peeing outside and it's just, it's kind of like dusk. And like a woman like yells at me. And I'm like, she's like, hey! And I'm like, ooh. Oh, you peed onto someone? No, I mean, there's a lot of land.

I'm peeing off of kind of like this hill and it goes down to a valley. And I go outside, I'm like, dude, I think your neighbor just like yelled at me. He's like, yeah, she like really gets annoyed with us. We like park in front of her house a lot of time. off of the lead. And he's like, yeah, she always yells at us when we pee, and I'm like, she has such a huge house. And he's like, I know she purposely hangs out over there

to yell at us. And I was like, wow, oh, like, how neurotic. And he's like, yeah, she's just like that. That's a good use. And that is a good, that is. But she's an artist. I was like, who is it? I guess it was derogatory.

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No, wait. Lana? Did you see the thing where she came out and she's like, I'm going bankrupt? I have to go back to working like a minimum wage job, like music. I don't get how that happens. Explaining me the house. Sidney just did that too where she's like, I cannot not work for six months because I can't afford it. Just bought like a $3 million.

I think they need to change their definition of being able to afford things. I think after I tried to level with her after like kind of being in the industry. Like, you know, I know a lot of people who work like on Broadway who are signing 30 to 40% of their income away to like agents, managers, whatever. you know I'm like throwing away 10% to my manager 10% to my agent 5% to the business manager whatever 40% to uncle Sam so then you're left with that right that little bit of the business you created but you still get to buy a four million dollar house right so do I feel bad no you can afford things you might just not be able to afford the things that you want and you're not making the entirety of your income right that doesn't mean that you're not still rich guys totally she has it really hard said or Lana

I mean, I'm sure she has it harder than men in the industry, but yeah, but like she's still closed on that $4 million house. They don't pay actors like they used to. That's true. I was actually talking to my landlord about this because my landlord was saying like the top percentage of the acting industry started making more and more and then everybody else started getting like moved down. Sorry. Have less actors. Didn't there used to be like 11 actors? Brad Pitt, Angelina Jones, Johnny Depp.

Like now there's 50 a day. Can we talk about how we're talking about there's too many actors? on a podcast where people are like, stop making podcasts. There's too many podcasts. There's too many of everyone. Yeah. Everybody just stopped doing what you're doing. Everybody stopped working.

We're gonna have like a, what is it? There's like a working percentage of people that get paid not to work. What is that? Yeah. Oh, is there? I like that. Tell me more about that. Who was running, was Andrew?

Garfield? No, who was the guy running for president who said he wanted to have a percentage of people who didn't work and they just got paid like a living wage? I don't know, but I'm loving that. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes, yes. I think it was him. Whoa. Wait, I think that was from Veep. I don't watch TV, so I don't know.

I think that was one of the characters in Veep Lime. It was a genuine like, yeah, yeah. I appreciate you nodding and us being able to move forward. Always, always. I mean, I'm waiting for, like, something to be pulled up. Well, no. Let's just go with Andrew Chen. Okay, so she's like, they don't pay actors like they used to.

I think she's talking about these mega-meagena celebrities, like on Angelina Jolie that does one movie and then doesn't really need to work for, I can't even think of a movie, Angelina Jolie's in, but that's like the level of A-list where... Andrew Yang! Yeah. Yeah.

He wanted there to be like a living wage or something where people didn't work and they just got paid like minimum wage, which makes sense. Oh, my dad would shit his pants if he heard that sentence. My dad would be like making the money. I'm ready to retire and by retire just stop working. Seems like nobody wants to work for it. Yeah.

Yeah, you want to go. After unemployment during COVID, like, yeah. Like that was pretty nice. Go figure no one wants to go work anymore. I can't imagine where they're coming from. Yeah, that's great. 9 a.m. podcast are brutal, you guys. I guess I am having a hard time just like feeling sympathetic for Sydney,

Sweeney and at this moment. But I actually, all power to her. I am too. Like, I have trouble with her, but like I really like her. Yeah. So it's harsh for me to. I think you can like her and just like not vibe with one thing she said.

They have two incomes too, like her and her. Sydney. Oh, and her fiance. Yeah, she's engaged. Just like an old man. He's not old. He's in his 30s. No, he's older than 30s.

No. I swear. Is he 40s? He might be like 39 plus. Jonathan Devino has is, let's see. That is tiny text. He is. Connor, use those retinas.

I'm looking so close at this thing. Did you say use those retina? Yeah, I can't see. I'm looking at Jonathan. Oh my God, I was like vinging another episode. He had your glasses on like reading it. Yeah. I was like, me, me, me.

It's bad. Once I get that health insurance, it's game over, though. So my, like, my vision has been getting worse. And so I go into the, like, optometrist, and I'm trying to get it checked. And I'm like, yeah, I think my vision got worse. I can't see stuff. Like, everything's blurry. And he's like, no.

You just are, like, you developed, like, an A, like, stigmatism. And I'm like, well, what does that mean? Like, can we fix that? And he's like, no. You can try these contacts. And they just, like, shift and refocus in your eyes you can see. But he's like, there's nothing we can do. Like, your eyes just develop, are developing in a weird way.

eyeball has better vision than the other. That's just a word I use and just don't know what it means. Well, I think it can be in one and not the other, but it's the shape of your eye changes for the contact. So, like, things get blurry around the edges now. And I'm like, great. You know that a segmentism was just created by AcuVoasis to sell more contacts. Did you want to figure out how old he was on?

He's 38. He's 38. Okay. How old is she? Late 30s? Younger than not. Me. Yeah.

She's 22? No, I'm sorry. That's a lie. She's 24. Oh my God. Yeah. I genuinely think like... I like dating older though.

I like my girlfriend's older. I always date people who are older than me. Yeah. I have to say she's done a lot of Netflix stuff, but you're 24. Are you saying they don't pay 24-year-olds like they used to? Because I don't think they ever have. Right. I don't know.

I mean... Most 24-year-olds are at, you know, doing a desk job. I was looking up like... Yeah, I don't really feel about. 40-gram max for her at the end of the day. I was looking at how much people have. have saved by age because I'm like I'm, I feel like I'm never saving enough. Like I'm like, yeah. Like my dad's like Jewish and like he was super like being like don't spend your money.

Like be super conservative and like he was just like super like savvy with business and money always. And I was looking at like how much people have saved and it's like to have saved over like $1,000 at like 22 or 23 you're in like the top like 90% of people or something. And like to have saved over $20,000 you're in like the top point one percentage of people at like $20.3.000. like 24 years old. Yeah. I'm like, that's crazy. That is crazy.

Yeah, my parents are the same way. That's another. Same. It's so, they're so, so frugal, which is funny. With, like, stuff. Uh-huh. They'll spend on, like, traveling and stuff, but, like, stuff, they won't buy. Yeah.

My parents are just so inconsistent. It's just, like, we'll, like, spend so much money to remodel the kitchen, but, like, we're not going out to eat. Yeah. It's just like. No, yeah. No, no, same, same, same. I'm the same way.

It made me, like, when I started making money be so restricted. And it really made me unhappy because I was like, again, living in this one bed of flex in New York when I could go get this like big studio in Tribeca. And it made my life suffer because I was scared to spend the money because I was like, it's going away. Right. And then I saw this thing where it's like the tighter you hold money, the quicker it like goes away. It ebbs and blows. It also ebbs and flows. That's.

If I tried the DoorDash or Uber Eats in front of my parents, I think that they would have an aneurysm. Really? Yeah. That's something that is just like so foreign to them. Whoa. It's just like lazy probably or like, yeah. Why are you spending double to get it delivered? I'm like, well, let me break it down for you.

I don't want to go get it. I was thinking about why people get Teslas and whatever and the self-driving. And after being stuck in like 40 minutes of traffic on PCH, I was like, this makes sense because if I could work for the 40 minutes, like it would pay off how much this car costs, the 10,000 more for self-driving in the long term, if I can work instead of driving. I think my issue would be like, oh, cool, I have 40 minutes to work. 40 minutes typing one single tweet.

You know, I see you on Twitter a lot, and I'm like, your tweets are so funny, but I suck at Twitter. He's so good at Twitter. I like your tweets. Oh, my God. I like, I like, need to get into the meme side of Twitter because that's where all the memes like originate. But I feel like I never had it in high school, so I'm either on it when I'm like severely depressed or like trying to flex. And I'm like, yeah, fuck all my enemies. Well, yeah, Twitter for me is like a sounding board or it's like I have no pressure.

I'm not worried about followers on Twitter. No one comments back and like ripped you apart. No, but Twitter can be so mean if they get like the bad stuff And they rip you to shreds I think with any platform I've said this a hundred times Once it hits when it goes a certain level viral It's just the dumbest people on the planet

They get a hold of it and they You chew on it And they're dumb and stupid That's like yeah I got one yesterday that was like This is your worst work yet And I said I got that too

I said I could let this get at me But I won't and then I did Oh no no fully when I like, during TikTok, like, obviously, like, you're in front of the camera a lot, and I gained, like, 20 pounds during a period of time. And, yeah, and I, like, posted this picture, and I stopped, like, going in the sun, and I was just unhappy. And I was this picture where my outfit and somebody was like, damn, you really fell off.

And I was like, oh, my God. People are. I deleted the picture within five minutes. I was like, loki, this is not my best work. Like, I know the place I'm in. And you're so right. That's the worst when people are like, this isn't it, Bestie? No.

I think Bestie derogatory. like should be a legal a legal to say. Oh, I got a good one. This is good. Keep talking. Keep talking.

Bestie derogatory? I got, I got. Or girly, girl. Girlly. Or hey girl, coming to you as a woman. That should be a cancelable offense. Yesterday someone was like, Bessie like, you know what's the worst?

Bessie like this should have saved in the drafts. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, this is what I seen yesterday. What? So Doja Cat, who I admire for her work, her tweets are really funny too. Doesn't give a shit. She knows her worth

She tweeted something yesterday Just like full bone Like you are all so fucking dumb It scares me And I was like that's she's talking to her fans No well I was talking to my friend My like best friend about DojCat Because my really good friend has been in the music industry

For a while And she was like people don't understand That Dojica Dojah Dojah Welcome to Switzerland We have Dojicat Das Otto

Or is it Vossato? I don't know But Whatever She's been in the industry for so long. And people think she just now popped during COVID. This woman was working for eight years before COVID, making music on Sound Club, pretty big on a soundclub. That's a good point. And then she blew up during COVID.

And they're like, great, your career's starting now. Work your ass off. And it's like, no, she's been working for like eight years before this making music like for a very long time. And now they're like, okay, go on tour, do all these things. Like, she's tired. Like, she's over it. Exhausted. Yeah.

It's really exhausting when people act like your brand. new when like I'm now two years into doing this and I'm like I'm not I'm tired oh that I mean we get we get messages all the time about the podcast like we know hey I know you're new to this but here's some feedback I'm like how about you do it on your own podcast if you have feedback go make your own podcast and then I was reading your comments and they're like get her a mic stand yeah all these things we're working on it don't eat into the mic they're like yeah oh my god then just like 30 seconds forward well doja cat said if you say shit like doja baby what is this In my comment section, I automatically fucking low with you.

Do not return. If I could recognize you all in person, I would refuse to speak to you. That's how not sick. I think it is. I mean, it's like, imagine like you're like, just like a normal person. You're getting ready and your friend's like, eyeliner could be a little sharper, bestie. Right.

Like that's the day to day online about every little detail. But the thing is, if your friend said that to you, it's like, okay, like you're my friend. Like these people who are just commenting it, like, we don't know you. We don't know the tone that you're saying. It's just like. I always read it in the worst time. I know. It just feels.

Yeah. Yeah. And you also, if you acknowledge it, like, open a can of worms, it's like, all her comments back to that. I used to acknowledge everything. Yeah, I used to acknowledge everything and respond in video form and that it would encourage people to just leave more shitty comments.

Now you block. Now you block, which I think I'm pro. I'm pro block. I love it. We talked about, do you know Jack Martin? Yes, yes, yes, yes. So he would go onto our accounts and find people that were talking. But he lives in Canada, right?

Oh, sure. That's Jack In and, Inan. No. Oh, and think about Jack. Yeah. So Jack Martin was our... Jack Martin out. Jack Martin was our buddy.

Was our buddy. He was some power. Rest in power, Jack Martin. No, he's in Australia shooting a show. But he, we lived together all of us, and he would go on our accounts and find people that would say shit like that.

And he would block them from his own account so that they were fully blocked on everybody. So... He was like, if they don't like your stuff, like I don't want them looking... I don't want my page. If I see a hate video about me or even like one of my good friends,

I go through those comments and I block those people. Because even if it's on my page, I don't want you in my page. Like, it's free for you to watch my stuff so I can take it away at any time. I feel like I did a little binge of y'all's pod and I still want to know like how you guys know each other. I don't know. I feel like you might have gone over this before. No, that's like how did you meet. It can't hurt to refresh.

Yeah. We met on TikTok. TikTok. Yeah. Yeah. We were a pandemic baby. So like we came to rise 2020. Now you're like forced to socialize.

Yeah. And like meet each other in person. It's brutal. Well, I was like to Connor, like, okay, I'm gonna come to California and meet you because I lived in Philly. He lived out here and he was like, okay, like he was like drunk, right, when you agreed.

Yeah, as an Elvis. Yeah. Elvis, what is that called? Impersonation. Yeah. You love a dress-up moment. Oh, man. I wasn't cosplaying his Elvis.

I was watching fake Elvis perform. Okay, okay, yeah, yeah, okay. And then he like drunkenly agreed for me and our other friend Kat, who's on TikTok, to come visit him. And we did. And then it was really fun. And then we just like became really close. And then I moved out here 2021. And then we lived together for a bit. Me, Connor, our friend Sally Dar and Jack who blocks people. And we had like a real one. I don't know if I would call it a content house. But I guess it kind of. I always was jealous of that. Because in New York, there's not like there's not like there are a lot of TikTokers now. But at the time, like I just felt like I was in my room like doing it alone. And I was like, damn, these content house is kind of look kind of sick. Like I'm missing out. Yeah. I feel like I kind of don't know a ton of people in the space and everybody that's in L.A.

knows each other. Yeah. That is nice. That is a good thing about L.A. But it's also a bad thing about L.A. No, like literally everybody knows each other. Like I'm like, oh, yeah. I'm like, this person.

They're like, oh, it was at their birthday party the other day? No, no, that is literally what it is. And what's weird is there's no degree of separation between, like, levels of how famous you are on the internet? It's like, yeah. Did you see the video of Tana Mojo on the carpet with Brad Pitt? Wait, wait. And she walks by her and she doesn't even push. She doesn't even look.

She's like, yeah, yeah. No, we were there. We were at the room. You're so annoying. That's what I'm saying. I have to say. Go ahead. Go ahead.

Can you? Can I come? Yeah. Yes. Well, that's, that's. I'm paying a publicist to be here. Once people know you're here, you'll be invited. Oh my God.

I'm starting to get the event invites and I'm like, I don't know who's going. And I don't want to show up alone. I know. You can always hit us up. Yes. It's funny because like L.A., as cliches it sounds like, when you're here, you get cool opportunities. Like, we got invited.

This is the second premiere that I've been to because I got really accidentally too drunk at the first one. But, um... You were fine. So this one... This one, we show up. It's by like...

At this theater, whatever. We show up. Bullet train. I didn't want to... It was phenomenal film. Go see... It was so good, and I don't like action movies, but I was hooked.

And Brad Pitt is a comedian. Really? Yes. I don't see that from him, but I'm kind of curious now. Really good. Go see bullet train. This looks really good, like really well done. What?

Joey King was phenomenal. Brad Pitt was... Joey King's popping off. Like, in her glow-up era, like, King of Valorti is shaking. This was like, is going to have people making fan camps. Oh, I'm so excited.

I'm so excited. The bucket hat. Brad Pitt changed. It's one of those movies where my personality is going to be temporarily changed. I bought a bucket hat. I'm going to start wearing trench coats.

I don't blame you. I feel like you've already been through a bucket hat moment, though, like at some point in your life. I did you ever wear chubbies? No. Okay. No, no, no.

Sorry, Chubs. It's like really loose baggy shorts I don't have the legs for it Anyway so movie was phenomenal Oh he looks hot Yeah no he was there obviously And so was bad bunny bad bunnies in the movie Oh my god I love bad bunny

And Aaron Taylor Johnson You know who that is? Did you ever see Angus Thongs and Perfect Snogging Yes Incredible film The Big guy Joey King Yeah Oh yeah

Brian Henry was in it too And he was so fucking good He was there Anyway so we're sitting there I didn't realize that like Joey King Brad Pitt Bad Bunny

Brian, Henry, we're all going to be at Aaron Taylor-Lajon. We're all going to be sitting next to us. It was really cool. But then I look over at Brooke because we got seated separately. I'm sitting with my... Sitting yourself. My friend. I'm looking... I'm looking back like this next. She's in the next row back and I was going to wave. Tana Mojo walks. Someone goes to Brooke

and they're just like hugging and like Tana Mojo sitting there. And then I'm in the background as Brad Pitt. I'm like, what is this world that we're in? Tana left like 30 minutes in. God bless her. God bless her soul. But she was everywhere. She's everywhere. She got red card.

At nowhere at the same time. She really is. She got the press in. Saw enough of the movie. Got a good feel. And then I will say this movie, like, again, was, it was fun. It was a fun movie. But I didn't understand it until the last three minutes, and I think it was 98 minutes or something.

I actually was shocked that I understood. I understood it because I was paying attention. Usually I don't understand movies because they lose me a bit and then I can't come back. But this one, like, I couldn't stop. I couldn't, it didn't lose my attention for a second. Because it was nonstop. I guess that's what an action movie is. Yeah.

Yeah. I tried to watch the Minions movie and it was a whole ass mess. I have to say something about the minions. What? I like like the music that comes out of their mouth. Oh yeah. Oh, do you hear the Yeet song? The Yeet Minion song?

Yeah. No, but like I like want to listen to that in the club. Similarly. Oh yeah. I love Alvin and the Chimmonk stuff. Wait, can we talk about like party culture is reverting back to clubbing and like going, I'm like people are like, yeah, I went to catch. I think it started with disco. like when that disco era

where people are like I want to actually go out and dance No I feel like because during COVID there were so many like guerrilla parties like like makeshift parties and now we're going back to what it was like when partying was like normal and accessible and now it's like going to the club

I'm like please. Yeah I won't be participating No bottles at the table No vodka cram for me I don't really club I don't really club That's also what's cool about here There's like house parties in New York

It's like nobody has a house to throw a party It's like there's a living room with no windows I love a good house party or like an empty bar with a dance for. Yeah, like a rented-out bar. Like all your friends are at the bar, yeah. Otherwise, I'll be home knitting.

I forgot the last thing about that premiere is that you wanted to talk to Dylan Spouse. Yeah, of course I did. I love the Spouse twins. I know. And Connor's friends with Dylan, and he refuses to introduce me. Wait, I feel like you're the intro with everybody between y'all.

He will not. This is the hard no. No. Conor Gay keeps me from a few select people. Really? It's really, really good. Why? What's the origin?

What? Like you're embarrassed? Like what? Yeah, exactly. She's making up a narrative. No, I'm not. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Have you introduced me to Dylan's brows?

You want Dylan all to yourself? I didn't. I don't want to say this. You were speaking to him. Because. And I was there. I'm clenching my fruit roll up right now in anger. It's like sweating into your palm.

Every time, this has happened multiple times. I just want to say hi. Then go say hi. Introduce me. No, I didn't want to. I don't want to go up as a fan. I wasn't there to socialize. I didn't want to talk to anyone.

But you were talking to him. Oh, but that is my friend. So? Which one's dating the model? Dylan. Dylan, and she was there too. I just want to say hi. That was the most, just so you know, I was actively trying not to talk to anyone.

And then, because it was a very packed house when you got in there. And, like, I was just like, okay, this is, I was totally sober, obviously. Usually I can go to those things. Not obvious. Why don't say obviously. That's not obvious. What? So, so my buddy, I didn't realize.

it came together. He's like, oh, like, whatever. Like, your buddy was there with Dylan? Yeah, Tanner. And my first thing I say, because I'm already having, so, that anxiety where you start to just like talk and then it feels like you're drunk, and I was just like, what am I saying? What am I? I, I couldn't stop talking. And I was like, yeah, have you guys seen my nipples? And I said that, and that Barbara Palvin's like, no way. They're inviting anyone to these things. And I'm like, why? I'm like, why? I just see my nipples and I was like, yeah, they've been totally showing through my shirt. And then when I start to, I'm out my nipples for some reason.

They get hard. They start to get hard. Manifesting it. Or fully showing and I'm wearing a white shirt and it's pretty then. And I was just like, all right, anyways, I think it's almost 7.30. It was 7.14. I was like, I need to go sit down and I see. I was trying to get out of there so fast.

That makes sense. Do you feel better now? No. Because that's like the fifth offense. Okay. Yeah. It's kind of fucked up. And it's like other people as well.

Sorry. I'm surprised that living together didn't like put a strain on your relationship. Okay. All right. Well, let's for another episode. Oh, no. I'm living with my, well, me my best friend, well, my best friend's like renting my place

and we live together for a little bit. And like literally it became like siblings where I was like, shut the fuck up. Get out of my face. Take out of the, take out of the trash. Like it's so hard. Right. No. We were okay.

Yeah. There wasn't any like chores or like messiness that was an issue. Yeah. I don't think anything was really an issue. Besides getting kicked out of that house. You got kicked out? Yeah. Why?

Connor? I'm just going to say it. We had a get-together, which was at, like, stuff was open, so it wasn't like pandemic rules. Was it pretty vaccinated? Yeah, we had to be here.

It was like very early on. It was 2021. So we were out of 2020. It was in, but LA was still being really strict. So the Airbnb we were saying in was like, no gatherings of anyone else

outside the house. And it was a giant house and it was four of us. And so we had people over. And I said, this is stupid, because there are cameras and we know there are cameras. They're filming you in the house? So I said, so why would you set up the beer pong table in front of the camera? That was Jack Blockhead Martin. So I said, I really don't like this.

And Connor said, worse comes to worse. We'll get a slap on the wrist. It's a fence one after we live there for two and a half months. I'm like, they're not going to be, and it was, by the way, 13 people. Plan B is a backup birth control option that's there for you when things don't go according to plan. It specifically works after unprotected sex and before pregnancy occurs by temporarily delaying ovulation. Plan B is available nationwide at all major retailers and through delivery apps like DoorDash. No ID, prescription, or age requirement.

It's the number one OBGYN recommended brand of emergency contraception, and it won't impact. impact your future fertility. That's freedom to be. Use us directed. I lock myself in my room. And it was outside. At least it's not like some like really fucked up story or whatever. No, but 7 a.m. rolls around and everyone's kind of hung over. And I get a call and I knew that it was the person whose house we were staying in. And I was like, I rejected it. And I was like, hey, sorry. Hey, sorry. Can't come to the phone now. I'm on my way into a meeting. I'm like shaking. They're like looking at you on the camera. They're looking at me in my bunk bed, bottom bunk, shaking, and about to throw up.

Oh, my God. A true content house. It was so bad. And they were like, no, call now period. And I was like, okay. Hey, what's up? And they're like, so we check the cameras. Very disappointed in you.

I'm like, you're a landlord Airbnb host. Like, I don't need your approval. And then I was like, wait, yeah, I do. And they were like, anyways, pack your bags be out by noon. And it was like 7 a.m. And so I walk in a Brooks room and I go, hey. Not noon. Just like a massive.

imagine my POV just being like, this is bad, locking myself in my room all night, getting a knock on the door, seeing his slimy little face. And slimy little, you, something's going on over there. No, I'm pretty brutal. I'm sorry, I know, Dylan's brows brought out the worst to me, I'm sorry, I brought you a present

to if that makes you feel better. Yeah, it would make me feel better. Oh, it's under your chair. Victoria, you have one too. Sorry, I didn't mean that you have a slimy little face. That story just makes me sad. Yeah, I brought you both presents. Oh!

This is so cool. Connor, you can go first. Oh. Okay, Brooke got me a hat that says women want me, fish, fear me. That was on my Instagram suggesting. Oh, my God. I've fallen victim to a lot of Instagram ads. Me too.

I feel victim to that. I feel weak because of it. Should I put it on on the show? Yeah, I'm sorry. Just so everyone knows I'm Victoria Paris. I'm a Parisian fellow today. Buddy, buddy. Buddy. I hope you can forgive me for calling you Slimy.

Always forgiven. Thanks. And then Victoria, I brought you. Just say it. Brownies with Ranch. Hell yes. I saw that on TikTok. Who was saying that? That's good. There's no way that can be good. Yeah, so we have tried. Okay. The Senate star, Dove Cameron, loves Brownies and Ranch, but don't add her for it. I'm not trying this. I'm not going to add her for it.

Yeah, you got to try it. Just like a little bit. No ranch. I'll just fill up. Yeah, you try it. No, we all have to try it. We're all going to try it. We have to give our two cents.

What's the worst thing we've tried before? We've tried some pretty bad things. You know, it was really bad. The ice cream and soy sauce was really bad. I rather that at 10 a.m. You would think. No, the squid ink. You didn't try that.

Oh, no, I wouldn't try that. The brownies look good, though. Yeah, the brownies look fire. All right, so just some background for audio-only people. we are trying Dove Cameron's favorite TikTok. She said it was so fucking good. This is word for word. Her brownies and ranch.

That's a good amount. I'm putting very little ranch on it. Oh, bad? I don't like ranch as it is, nor do I like chocolate. I'm going in. Oh, yeah. Bad? She saw my vibe.

Saw my 10 a.5. Right. Kind of smells like dog food. Like not something that should... Don't judge me. That sounds like the worst most disgusting thing in the world, but it's unbelievable.

It is unbelievably bad. Not as bad as I was expecting at all. Can I have some of this? I think dog food is pretty spot on. What's yours is mine and what's mine is yours. Plus without saying, I did not hate that. What's y'all star signs? Gemini.

Gemini? Sick. Virgo. How about you? Ari. Eric. Yep. Um. Is that a March birthday?

April 10th. April 10th. That's what I was going to say. I really didn't hate that. I had to say. That feels like... I didn't get much ranch, but I already knew I wouldn't like it.

That feels like a pregnancy food. Yeah, 100% percent. Barney's with ranch. Did you know when you're like on birth control and stuff, it's like putting you in this like permanent state of like you're pregnant? Yeah. No, I didn't know that. Like the egg won't fertilize.

You should try it. But, um... What's a good birth? Take a walk in my shoes. Vasectomy. You sign me up. We should do a vasectomy live on the show. Yeah, tube tying.

Yeah. I can do it. Sorry, my tubes are tied on this one. I'll try it. I'll try anything once. Have you guys seen the TikTok series called Kenneth Kirkland? No. I went on it last night.

The TikTok series. Can you pull up an episode of it? It's so funny. I feel like y'all would love it. It's like this band, this band of like guys. And they take Kirkland alcohol, like Kirkland signature and they compare it to name brand alcohol. So last night I brought on a bottle. of Crown Royals, is that how you say it?

And the Kirkland version and that you take shots and it's like, Kenny Kirkland. And everybody tries to decide and it shows that like Kirkland's signature is like the same as all these alcohol. I love that. Costco has better. It's true. Costco is king. It was the first time I had taken a shot in like five years. I had to take two shots and it wasn't that bad.

But I was expecting myself to be hung over and I'm proud of myself. I'm proud of you too. I think that means it. Here it is. Oh my God. It's my favorite. Wait. Kenneth Kirkland.

where we try to determine the difference between name brand alcohol and Kirkland. Today's alcohol is Spiced Rump. Oh, they get a lot of likes. Yeah, I do think I know them. Yeah, they started two weeks ago. They have $170,000. Oh, my God. Good for that.

Are they really fun? So I pull up to this house and it's this massive house. It's fully furnished like with antiques and whatever. There's five dudes and all their girlfriends. And they're like, yeah, we moved to seven months and this artist Beatrice like rents it to us. And she's just traveling the world and they're living in her home which is like sick

and they just get fucked up every day and make videos and make music and their music's great too. Whoa. That seems like the life. I was like I need more friends in L.A. Would you like to be friends? And they're like, yeah,

do you want to come on for like a cooking with Costco? And I was like, please. Wait. So do you think that that one like blew up because you were in it? No, I wasn't in it. The one of the man comes out tomorrow but all of them have been blowing up.

That's sick. Yeah. And they were like, thanks for coming on. Like we appreciate it. And I'm like, it's not like you weren't pulling views on your own like yeah this is wild do you have any people on tictock that like you actively go seek out their page like before you go to bed at night you're like I need to check up on them and see how they're doing um not not really honestly I like feel like during the pandemic

there was a lot more like engaging content these are the first guys in a while that have been super and I was like I have to come on and they're like come come through like it's always like it's always a group of friends having fun because it's so often authentic. No, for me I have to check up on Violet and Scout. Oh, yeah. Who's that? The twins.

She seems so sweet. You know them. Scotch vodka. Oh, the twins. And I, Emily Mariko. I followed her.

I met her the sweetest girl ever. Oh my God. We got like breakfast. Just a fucking bitch. Please. No, I could not see that in any universe. But that would be a fun pop with. That would be awesome.

I could be a bitch. I have. Really? Just kidding. Did you guys think I be a bitch? No, I'm, I think you're just like the least pick-me person in a really good way. Really? Yeah.

I feel like I'm a big pick-fee. No. No, I just think you like say exactly what you're thinking. Wait, did you just... Did you just reverse psychology, yes? Did you just say, really? Because I think, you just, you just pick me by saying that, really? I thought I'd be such a pick-me.

I'm like, kind of just mind-blown. So, are you saying that would pick-me? My manipulative side is coming out. Oh, my God. You just, like, casted a net over both. No, you're not going to pick me. No. I was going to say the only account that I've sought out content recently is this

this, like, woman in her 50s built a pond in her house in, like, Wisconsin, and has bullfrogs that come visit her pond. Is that the one you've been sending me? This is unreal. I love your song. Oh, thank you. She was able to ID every one of them, so now they all have names,

and one's a total dick bag. One's, and, well, no, it's a small, it's probably as big as this area, yeah. But she has frogs come in, and sometimes there's bunnies that come in, and everything's named, and they kind of have their own personalities. So I go check in on them.

I watched one the other day. The two frogs were playing leap frog, and I'm not kidding. They had got one hop, the next one jumps over the other. Leap frog was built on facts. Who thought? Go figure.

That's just like a fun thing to learn online. Online, there's so many resources to learn. I feel like I'm so dumber. The more I'm chronically online, the dumber I guess. Yeah. It's a little here, a little bit. Yeah. You find something like that that you like, that feels good on your brain.

There's been something. I'm sorry. Anything left to say about the frog? No, I think I was just kind of droning on. Okay. There's been something that I've wanted to talk about for the past four weeks, and we never get to it. and I really want to get to it today

because there's been so much coming out about like unreleased One Direction audition. Yeah. Did I say that? Did I say One Direction? One D-Fandition. Oh my God. One Direction audition footage.

Yeah. Harry Stiles. Unreleased audition footage just came out. But what I want to talk about that I feel like we don't talk about enough is Louis Tomlinson's audition that has been out forever since he auditioned. And I just feel like no one talks about the fact

that he really went up there saying, hey there, Delilah. in the way that he sang it. Rolled a clip. And then got three yeses. I don't know what you're, I don't know what this is. I want to watch and know that this man went on.

Open ears, open mind, open heart. And Louis certainly impressed the judges when he first auditioned. What's your name? My name's Louis Tom Winston. Off you go. Oh, it's what you do to me. Oh, what you do to me. It was the haircut.

All three of them said. Louis is all. That's what I love about the voice or whatever, where their backs face to the person, and it's just blind. I feel like looks can really cloud it. Like you said, they're judging by the cover. To be honest, I don't even know why the cover would sway them in this moment. Back in the day, back in the day, that was the look.

This is, we witness an industry plant come to life. That was like, that's straight up industry plant. Wait, have you like... No one talks about it. Have you read the things about how, like, K-pop stars are in, like, binding, lifelong contracts? Like they are like they can't be free of them a lot of times and so wow yeah it's crazy Kesha vibes oh my god did you see that she said stop using the money sign in my name she like made a TikTok and she's like when people still use the money sign wait why did she drop the money sign?

I used to have a money sign here what is you have something there it said psycho with a money sign on the S but now all that's left is show yeah but I was really drunk so it wasn't too bad okay um so thoughts on that audition uh I just like That sounds like me. That's all I have to say. Where's he been? What's up with him, though, is what I want to know. I think he's touring, which is insane.

He's been the most low-key one for me. He is, like, very low-key. Zane, he had a little bit of drama. It's because he got out on scathed somehow from that. Louis? Yeah, he did, yeah. Like, nobody's resurfacing that clip by us. Well, he had a kid.

Really? But I think he might have still been in one direction when that happened. I love. Yeah, he has an album. I just like he's not. He kind of looks like just random body parts. His haircut hasn't changed at all. Yeah, random body parts all put together on the face.

I kind of, I really like celebrities that are so quietly famous. That's the coolest thing ever to me. That's why you love doja cat, because everybody's like. Yeah, because she's so low key. No, I like when celebrities are just like, I did what I had to do. And now I'm peace out. I'm still going to make so many royalties. That's why I, like, really love Jenna Marbles.

Jenna Marbles, like, haven't seen anything from her, haven't heard from her. It's crazy having the power that she holds where she could pop back at any second make a video of her farting and make several million dollars. Same in case you nice that. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'll text him, I'll be like, where are you at?

And he's like, Nan, tug it with the fam. Our house almost got... I did a podcast with him, like, really long ago. And he's like, our house almost got set on fire. And I'm like, the way that this man isn't filming any of this. Yeah. He's just living his life at this point. That is such a cool place to be in

where you know, just like you could come back whenever you want people would be stoked, but you don't have to. Yeah, he just makes what he wants now, you know? There's no pressure. We're living the same life in the sense that neither of us are vlogging anything. Oh my God, I was looking on your TikToks for like cutdowns of this, and I was like, there's none.

I post them. I need to find, I was like, because I like to repost the podcast that I'm on and I'm like, oh, we'll get you. We'll get you clips. We have like our own TikTok account. Okay, cool. Yeah. I just have such bad ADHD where like we go to, I go to try to remember something that we said

or something, and then I listen to the whole thing all the way through and I forget to look for clips. I couldn't make the clips I couldn't make the clips I need somebody to do that for me we'll get you all set up thank you so much yeah oh my god of course

we have it oh wait can I Can I use that one bullet point Which one? The blocked Oh I can speak very vaguely on that But I can I'm not ready to go into detail Okay

What's happening Go do Mois style vague on this bulletin I saw you explain Dumas on another episode And I was like that's good Like I would not have understood What it was Yeah oh cool

Yeah yeah so do Mois Something bad happened to me this week. It depends how you define it, which I will give you the most vague detail. Basically, like, one of my big personality trait is just being, like, so obsessed with people. And, like, delusion vibes. I know. I mean, you like, Wendy. Yeah, that was a big thing.

Just, like, my whole brand. Like, Lady Ephron, my username was because I was so obsessed with Zach Ephron when I was little. And just kind of changes. Yeah, it was my email address. Just kind of changes. the person, but the delusion's still there. So one of the people that I'm obsessed with... You take the girl out of the cycle.

Yeah. I don't even know how to say this vaguely. Basically, one of the people that I'm actively obsessed with and speak about often, I have somehow... I've clearly upset someone close to them, to the point

of them blocking me on all social platforms. So basically in other words, this person that I'm obsessed with girlfriend. Good luck figuring out who that is, everybody that listens. Has blocked me, but it's like not public. Their relationship isn't public, so it's like, how would I know that?

How do you know that? Did you seek this person out? No, not necessarily. Someone was like, this is this person's girlfriend. And then when I went to look at it, I was not able to see. I have my guilty pleasure binge it or like watches where I go back and I'll go from a burner and I'll look at people from high school. or ex-boyfriends

and I'm like, damn. Like, you have not changed your LinkedIn profile pictures since we broke up. But I think there are two ways to look at me being blocked. One is, like, that's so cool that, like, this person is maybe, like,

threatened by me and my obsessive personality. Or they just can't help themselves from looking you up. Right. What I'm nervous about is that this person has brought the hatred of me to said celebrity

that I'm obsessed with. Oh, I didn't think about that. Yeah. Imagine that said person is like, this girl's so fucking annoying and she sucks. And then, said celebrity I'm obsessed with is like yeah she

I think celebrity you're obsessed with should get docked some points for dating someone that would block you on all platform I feel like the obsession that I have with the celebrity has been jeopardized by what happened. No because I feel like if you're a celebrity that happens to you all the time but if you're dating somebody who's like not in this scene you're like oh it's fine like don't worry about

a baby and she's like I'm gonna block her he's like yeah whatever you feel comfortable with she sounds like a freak please you're like loki rudal I can't say any more detail you're like his face is a lot of talking about You cannot provide any word. He's a bunch of body parts.

That was rude. But I'm just saying it kind of looks just like... The Virgo's coming out. Kind of looks like you tried to draw him from memory, but he is him. Who are we on now? Louis Thomas. You know, you do a police report and they like describe his name. You think about Connor is like somebody always has to look like something else.

What do I look like? Let me think about it. I look like Miranda Cosgrove. I'm more about like an inanimate object. Oh my God. like a piece of my chicken. That is even better. It upsets you for some reason.

It doesn't upset me at all. I love that. I love that. I love like finding like commonalities. Yeah. I'm usually pretty spot on too. I think because right now we're sitting so close and I'm not. Let me get a good look at you.

It doesn't upset me, Con. Okay. I don't want you to think I'm upset with you. Oh, that's fine. Do you like your hat? Yeah. It looks really good on my slimy face. That's like me after like, I feel bad.

That's like me after I like insult anybody and I'm like, here's a good way. Okay, so I have two things, but I want to... Wait, who do you think our celebrity lookalikes are? Because we have two that we get all the time. Okay, lady and the tramp when they're sucking the spaghetti, the dog, you look like one of the dogs in that? Oh, that's cool. I haven't gotten that. Yeah, with the...

Because of my layers. Yeah, especially the hairstyle you have right now. I wish we could pull up a pick. Yes. Yes. The dog on the right. Well, cool. Like, oh, on the right.

Yeah, yeah. That looks cute. Look like the scrappy street dog. People tell me I look like the fish from flushed away. Can you guys Google flushed away fish? I see that dog. Wait, I know the fish they're talking. No, I'm not thinking of flushed away.

Shark tail. Shark tail. No, I look like the mousy girl from flushed away and the fish from shark tail. Wait, the one with the braces? Yeah, can, any way we could pull her up at all? Sharktail braces. Okay. I don't know cartoon character or anything, but.

I saw a picture of Tom Holland taken in Mexico last week. You kind of look like Tom Holland. It almost made me so scary because in my head I was like, did I black out and go paddleboarding? And the paparazzi. Look how fucking scary that is.

No, not the hot fish. Yeah, the yellow fish. That's Will Smith. No, maybe, no, is that Will Smith? Is there another girl fish? There's another fish I think you're talking about, but I think it's another movie. Oh.

Maybe I am thinking about the hot fish. Yeah, yeah. Her. Yeah, yeah, I see that. Yeah. I'm trying to think of yours. Oh, that, like, you know that, like, it's not animated, but it's like this furry bear that I have sent you before that you kind of look like. Oh, my God, Paddington Bear?

No, I'll show you. Well, I'll put it on. No, I'll show you. That's not a fuzzy bear. It's like the scary. No, dude. It's like the most uncomfortable. I feel like you just look like, I feel like you have one of those faces.

It's like super familiar. so I'm thinking of people from my high school and I'm like, you look like them. Yes, a couple people have said I look like an unfinished terracotta pot. Yeah. But you don't look like that that much today with your stash.

Okay, cool. That was a funny thing. Oh my God, I've been told I look like Cody Co. Oh. Many times, many times, many times. Oh, I could see that. Sorry, I'm just pointing this up. I get Amy Winehouse.

Oh, that's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one. Well, we have a couple bullet points that we could touch on, or I could read this interesting Reddit post while I look for this photo. Okay, no, we could do bullet points.

Yeah, I feel like we'll have a lot of things to say about these bullet points. Do you want me to take a bullet point while you're looking? Yeah, take a bullet point. I just want to preface these bullet points by saying, sometimes Brooke and I have this note page, and it doesn't make a ton of sense, but some things happened during the week and I want to touch on it, but it doesn't

fit into any sort of structural structure. And I know that we got one comment last week, not to give anyone any credit that said that we keep steering the conversation. into a random. That's the point of the thing. So thank you for the compliment, I guess.

Thank you for the feedback. We won't be accepting it at this time. My mom told me I have to stop reading comments. She's like, is really taking you into a dark place. My therapist really, it's like, but I'm trying to get a life coach instead of a therapist. Really? Therapist is for me. Well, I love my therapist, but I feel a lot worse a lot of the time once I leave.

I guess because I'm just like bringing shit up. It's like doing yoga. Like I see when you do yoga, like you release all this like stress in your life. And it's like when you release it, you're like left in the wake of it. and you're like, damn, I have sucks. The thing my therapist told me about reading comments is like, because I literally can't stop. No, same.

I'm like a masochist. It's a drug addiction. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I love getting hurt. But it's like she would tell somebody who's addicted to drugs, like not, don't stop doing drugs cold turkey, but like do them in a safe space, you know?

So I have to read the comments in a safe space. I'm like, if my hair's done and I'm reading a comment, it's like your ugly shit. I'm like, so read them when you feel good about your life. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like if you're feeling like shit about yourself and then you read comments, you're just going to feel worse.

Or make it into a bit, try to do it. I try to take it and weaponize it against them off views and likes and clicks and money. Oh, that's good. Yeah, that is good. So this is what Brooke thinks I look like. Not in a bad way. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like, it's like Paddington Bear. Just like, so I'll see if I can get it on the video.

It's just in the expression. It's the expression. This? Yes. Side profile. It's cute. Okay, I found it. It took me that long. Just so that LPSG gang doesn't have any. Conner's on a lot of gay forums.

Just large penis support group. I'm not on them, like, scrolling them. He's featured. I'm featured. He's featured. I'm featured. I'm featured. You see a selfie camera to see how this looks.

What's your lock screen? A sandwich. Oh, that's a funny story. That is a really funny story. Okay, so last Thursday I got extremely toxicated. You still use Snapchat? Yeah. Everybody doesn't use Snapchat.

It's probably my top app. I love Snapchat, honestly. Oh, I have my work account. So last Thursday I was not drinking, obviously, and then I got almost blackout. I would say blackout. We went to karaoke bar. Yeah. No, almost.

I've never been to a karaoke bar. I've always wanted to go. You should come. It's really fun. I'm down. I think if you just are missing a few parts of the night because they're blurry, I don't think that it's a brown out, not a blackout. But you said you didn't remember at all going back to our friend's house.

No, I said I remember sitting there and singing and stuff. So anyways, we go to this karaoke bar And so, etc. You are gaslighting me today. I'm not, sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I feel really bad. I feel really bad. I was really bad. I did say a little bit.

I feel bad. I feel really bad. Okay, so the reality that I live in, I know, which is my memory of my life, is basically I get out of the Uber at my house. And as he drives away, I'm like pulling out my flashlight to walk up my stairs and I go, my phone's in the Uber. And I'm like, what do, what do I? I do. I'm in the, I'm like, I can't sprint after his car. It's like 3 a.m.

Can't sprint after his car. So I like run upstairs, go to my laptop and FaceTime it. He's not answering and I go. All right, whatever. It was on like 70%. I'll go find it in the morning. Right. So in the morning, I check find my friends. It's not there. It's in the most random scary area ever. And I drive all the way there 45 minutes using MapQuest. Uh-huh. Like download it. Wow. Wow. How did people used to just, just, my dad used to print them out. Like he used to have all the cues in a binder. Isn't that that? Isn't that that?

No, so I'm on my laptop. Like, okay, next exit 35. Well, you have to contact Uber support. The funniest part is when you contacted Uber support and they were like, what was your phone like? I contact Uber support and they're like, okay, cool. To access your account, we've sent you a ping to your phone. Please.

I lost my phone so I can't access the ping. What do I do? Right. You can contact support. So I'm going back forth with support for like two hours on my laptop. because I drive all over here to this guy's house, and he has a fence that is so far away from his house, and I would have to scream.

And it's like 11.30 a.m. And I didn't want to scream in this neighborhood, and I didn't want to hop his fence to go knock on his door because he had sheets and newspapers covering his windows. And I could see his car, and I saw where my phone was pinged. It was definitely in his driveway. Breaking the window. So I go to a Starbucks, I sit there, and I'm going back and forth,

and they're like, okay, thanks for being patient while he sort this out. what did your phone look like? And I was like, it was in a black case, it's an iPhone. They're like, we just need you to confirm your background, your screen background. And I was like, it's a close up of a turkey club. And it is, it's a close up of a turkey club. That's my turkey club that I randomly airdropped him a few weeks ago. What's funny is that like...

You guys have such a great relationship. I love turkey club so much. Oh, it gives me chills. I love Turkey Club so much that I was like... This is the phone that was in the Uber though. Yeah, and they go, oh, good news. We found your, we can confirm that your phone. The Turkey Club has been located.

They confirmed it. We sing the Turkey Club. They can confirm it via Turkey Club. Anyway, so I have my phone. You can never change that lock screen now. No, I don't want you to ever. Oh, we should have talked about dating apps earlier. We can talk about it now.

Okay, so one of the bullet points, these random bullet points that we don't know how to fit them in or even if we should talk about them. One is loud yawning. So the fights that I got in with my parents, this weekend that actually sent them home a day early was they've both developed this yawn which is like a learned response I think to piss me off because they taught me not to do this in public

they taught me that so why have they now developed it because they know it'll make me mad I think I think also like when you become older your parents like you're not around them so everything they do like my brother's breathing to them like could you just stop like could you just stop breathing? A normal yawn like anyone normal would do in public would be...

I've never had somebody... My parents say that. Okay. I'm a loud yawner. A yawn that you shouldn't do in public that my dad did at Panera Bread. Uh-huh. I was like,

what? No way! There's no way this is real. And he did it. And I was like, we're gonna get it kicked out of this establishment. Do you think it's because they don't have anybody to tell to, like, have better manners anymore that they just kind of like exist to this vacuum now

where they can do whatever they want. Maybe they just want to start something with you. I think that is a connection. They're passive as fuck. They want to connect. I feel something. Yeah. Yeah.

They want to fight. Yeah. Could be. I'll square up, Pete. Yeah. Just the yawning thing is just driving me crazy. I don't know if you guys have anything with sounds like yawning or chewing. Not really.

Like you know that I have my chewing thing. I know you have your chewing thing. I really like when I'm like focused and like totally by myself, I do this thing where I'm like. Oh. When I'm focusing. And I like when I was in dorms, my roommate would be like, shut the fuck up. And my like girlfriend now was like, yeah, you still do that. Because I have like a little guy.

in the top of my front teeth and I don't even do it on podcast like when people are talking and I'm silent I'm like you know when I think someone should be put in like long term to be taken out back yeah is when they do this like itch their throat with their tongue oh like wait how do you do that like wait how do you do that? I try to do it I can't really do it when they go like oh oh I've never seen somebody do that it's like when your throat is itchy and they're itching your tongue no my friend does that all the time Oh, it's sick in the head. It is a tough one. But I think the only noise doesn't really bother me is when someone's just talking really loud. Like, use your indoor voice. I say as I'm screaming at the top of my phone long.

I think I have hearing problems, though. Really? Because I've literally wore my AirPods maxes for two years straight. I'm like full volume. And I'll be in the car and I'll turn the volume all the way to full. And I'm like, this still isn't loud enough. Speaking of volume, I think we should end on Jane Lynch's tweet from this week. Oh.

Goodgie. Goody. Okay. So Jane Lynch tweeted. Who is Jane Lynch is Sue from Did you ever see Glee? She's in Sue Sylvester

That's your leading coach What else is she in? She's in just everything 40 year old virgin She's Can you pull up a picture of Jane Lynch for Connor Like you In the tracks

She's just like in everything She didn't wreck it Ralph And Shrek? Wow Maybe you know her from the Selena Gomez version of Cinderella story She was in Talladega Nights My Favorite movie

I haven't seen it And Rush my favorite movies I just rewatch Talladega nights it's gold comedy gold. Molly Shannon's in it and that's my favorite character she's ever played. It's just drunk wife of like the really rich dude. Is she the one who was like

sign my tits? No she's the one up top of me the martini and she's like when the cars go by she's like feel the vibrations oh the owner's wife the owner's wife and she's just like drunk the whole time. She is a great actress I wonder if she's a method actress. Okay she's drunk like I don't know I So I told this, I don't know if I ever told this.

I almost got a car wreck in West Hollywood because I saw, I saw someone that looked like her and I was like, whoa, that woman looks. Can we pull a picture of Molly Shannon? I need like a visual. Sorry to totally reroute the conversation. You're good. We're doing this on you now. That's fine.

I saw another episode where you're like, I love Amy Polar and it's like this similar genre of women. Yeah. You love. Well, they're good. They're talented. Yeah. But I'm pulling around the side of this building and then I see someone that looks like her. And then I'm like, whoa, the other dude, she's sitting.

with looks like Will Ferrell. Pull around the corner. I'm like, that's freaking Will Ferrell. And they were having coffee, and I parked in a, in front of a fire hydrant, like, most in front that you could ever do. And then had a baguette sitting next to them thinking they would recognize me for some reason.

That's where my head's at. Yeah. Anyway, so Jane Lynch. Jane Lynch tweeted, I love woman. I am woman. Our voices are higher than men's voices. Women's voices can get into the annoying area

it gets too high. If you're doing a podcast, consider lowering your pitch a tad. If you think I'm being sexist about this, then I don't know what to do with you. She doesn't know what to do with you. Internalized misogyny is just so palpable. I think it's like, okay,

one thing if you think that, like, why would you, like you know what you're going to, it's just like JK rolling energy. But I think this is a lesson to all of us here. Lower our mics, lower our voices.

It's just like, JK rolling energy when she's like, I'm not transphobic, but trans people. shouldn't be in the back. Oh, my God. Oh, okay. Oh, I'm sure.

Thanks for practicing it. Did you guys see, who was the rapper who just came out as non-binary? G-Flip. No. Jimmy Levato. It was, is it Playward Cardi or Lil Uzi-Vir. Oh, I don't know. I don't know.

Lil Uzi-Virt is now non-binary, so it goes by they, them pronouns. Uh-huh. And so Lil Usyvert's girlfriend tweeted, just came home from the nail salon. Just came home from the nail tech. He asked me, did you get French or? like a stiletto he knows too much and then she responds to the tweet and goes oh oh shit asterisk

they I'm like not your girlfriend misgendering you that's I love LilyGie yeah but then their girlfriend totally misgendered that but a tweet and then responded didn't delete the treat

but responded and goes oh shit they well that's what you're supposed to do is just like quickly correct right yeah that's all you can do but it's writing like you could easily delete you could really yeah yeah yeah yeah that's a good point The efforts there. It's also the person who's around you all the time. Like,

um, that's really funny. That is. Um, well, I think we wrap up. We haven't even, I don't know how that was seven,

75 minutes. Time flies. Time five. Time five. When you're being, ranch. When you're being slimy. Um,

truly slimy. But Victoria Paris, that was too easy almost. Thank you so much for coming. Who people are going to love that. That's going to be, it's going to be, I actually sent chills from the back of my head.

To my asshole I've been really in an ASMR No but I like I would enjoy it Did you know they try to like demonetize it on YouTube Because they think it's some weird like porn stuff Yeah Which I loki get because it like put me to fuck this sleep It hit me in the spine

But thanks for having me Oh thanks for coming Thanks for coming Come back anytime Yeah and you're gonna move out here I also in an ideal world would be bicostal So maybe we could get a plane together Uh huh

That would be good What airline do you fly though? Any that will take me Mm-hmm Yeah Yeah You're like, I'm on a blacklist for a few. Yeah, I can't believe I'm not.

It's kind of crazy. It is. But thank you. You're the best. Seriously, thank you. Thank you guys for listening. Victoria, will you plug some stuff? At Victoria Paris on any and everything.

That's so nice to just have like one consistent. No, I'm like, Twitters, two A's, Instagram's one A. YouTube is my full name. Really? It's annoying. That's the first thing. I was like, I was like, it was Victoria Paris F for a little bit and I was like, drop the F on everything.

Drop the F. What's the F? I've always said that. We're not getting into it. You have a... It's Victoria fucking Paris. No, it's not. It would be Victoria Paris fucking.

That too. And guys, thank you so much to listening. We'll see you next week. Bye.