Bros & Shows - Jax's Last Finale, Zack's Last Straw(Part 1 of 2) (The Valley Finale Full Recap)

Episode Date: July 25, 2025

What's up Bros? We had to break this episode into 2 parts to make sure that we covered it all. In this episode, Jax has Danny in his crosshairs. The projection and deflection is almost comical. Brittany is finally completely done with Jax. Zack and Benji are settling in in their new life together in LA. Danny and Nia are fed up with Janet. Doute gets some troubling news about her fertility journey but DONT WORRY IT ALL WORKS OUT! Michelle and Jesse seem to reach an amicable place for now. All hell breaks loose at the zen party when Jax escalates, Janet and Jason run and Zack finally snaps. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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The twisted tale of Amanda Knox is now streaming only on Disney Plus. I'll tell you what, dude, I was a hot little potato for a lot of this episode. Were you? This was one of, if not, my least favorite Jacks episode that I've ever seen. I just think I'm at a point with Jacks and all of his antics that they don't affect me anymore. I would love to be there. I would love to be there. But the way, it's probably the subject matter that gets me so hot and bothered and not in a good way.

I imagine I take it a little more personally, which is also a me problem that I let him get under my skin. Fair. But, you know, save it for the pod. Save it for the pod. I've got to have me my pros and shows. Bros and shows. Brows and shows. I got to have me my pros and shows.

Good afternoon, everybody. Welcome back to another episode. of broves and shows. I'm your co-host, Steele Russell, joined as always by the one and only Santa Gut Rita. Is it because it's Christmas in July? No, Santa Clarita. Oh, okay. I thought you were calling me Santa Claus. No. No? Just no. All right. I thought it was just a holly jolly kind of guy. Maybe not today. Sometimes you're holly and jolly, but we are fresh off of a live show last night. We did a little live with Zach Peter down at the City Winery in Philly. Giorgio Sez was there. Jackie Goldschneider had a blast. And now we're in post-show

recovery mode. And as some of you know that have heard us talk post-show, it's like, it's weird how how drained you get the next day. Yeah, you're sort of hung over just from adrenaline. Drenaline? Yeah, probably. Like a performance issue. You can call it a skill issue if you really want to, but, uh, you know, it just happens every time. Yep. So it was nice to cozy up and I was like, I'm going to watch a little valley. We got the finale, extended episode. episode and god damn it if i wasn't livid i was livid yeah yeah i kind of figured that was going to be your takeaway from this episode i uh i thought it was good honestly i think the valley has and you know we've talked about this for week after week it's gone through a lot of problematic

episodes yeah it's gone through some very questionable episodes yeah and then i would say hawaii was sort of that that break in the middle that we needed kind of got us back to to even footing and the show i think we said this early in the season we didn't really know where the show was going to go i think i even had a hot take that the show wasn't going to last after next season i've kind of changed a little bit there's still some things that are popping up here and there obviously jacks being gone helps a lot uh but i i'm fully back in i think it can be one of the best shows on bravo for a couple of years just because these people are nuts i agree and i think the best way to put is they landed the plane yeah you know it was a little shaky there but solely jumped into action they landed that

bitch on the Hudson. It was. They bounced out, Sully. Shout out Sully. But they bounced back well because we were in the midst of the season. We had, I think it was like three in a row where it's like, Jesus, what are we doing here? This is going this going south in a hurry. And I think that they did a good job

of shifting and highlighting different things. And I think another part of it is at a certain point and I'm sure for the majority of people watching, or at least a lot of people watching, are able to be like, all right, I'm not going to pay too much attention to the jacksie. or you get to a point with Janet where you just kind of brush it off.

It's like she just sucks and it is what it is. So I think once that was set in stone where I didn't react so much to the Janet stuff and they were highlighting Doty and her pregnancy journey, they were highlighting all sorts of different things that were a little bit happier. And I think also Michelle and Jesse, them turning a corner where it wasn't so angry at one another. That also helped. Benji and Zach, they were great. to watch. I loved watching their scenes one-on-one. So I think it just, there was that

turning point that was very important. And I agree with you. I think that this still has the potential to be one of the better shows on Bravo. I'm excited to see next season. I'm curious about the other moves they're going to make in the offseason because there's a lot of pitfalls. If they bring those parasites from VPR onto the show, it's going to take a weird turn. If Janet and Jason come back, that's another hurdle we're going to have to get over because they're so alienated other than fucking Brittany that I just don't see how the flow of the show will continue if they're back. Yeah, I kind of have changed a little bit when it comes to Janet

just because I don't, I think everybody really dislikes her, right? But I think the cast is starting to see it, and I feel like where we are at the end of the finale. You can see that the cast understands what's going on, and they see Janet and Jason for who they are. Except for Brittany. Except for Brittany, which may never change. But I think we need at least another season just to see how they go.

I don't even, I'm not even going to say another season. I'm going to say, let's see how the reunion goes. Okay. Because if they go after her and a good amount of the castmates go after her and try to hold her accountable for it, let's see how she handles that. Let's see how Jason handles that. And then we can kind of make our decision at the end of the reunion, which is a weird place for me to be in, honestly, because I think two, three weeks ago when Jacks was announced, I said, now do Brittany.

I'm sorry. Whoa. I have to see how Brittany handles next year too. But I said, now do Janet, she might be necessary. I'm really unsure. She might be a necessary evil for the show if you don't have somebody like Jacks who, you know, I think they are teaming up and we'll get into that a little bit later. But I don't know. I think the jury's still out on her and Jason.

I can, uh, that's a funny thing now, dude. I'm like, Jason get the fuck out of here. Like, Janet. He's showing his true colors now. Exactly. It's starting to come out with Janet. She hit this. level like at the bottom and she just stayed there right it was just consistent so at a certain point

you know what to expect i agree with you there is a place for that on these shows it just depends how much into the shit she's going to go because it it reaches a point where it's not fun to watch right jason was just this gradual decline and then by the end it was like a quick steep drop off and it was like you went from being the quiet awkward nice guy in the group to being a vindictive shit-talking asshole so quickly in one season and watching the progression of that or the digression of that regression of that regression, whatever it is, was fascinating to a certain point. But it got to this, like, the end of the finale.

I'm like, what do you offer to this show? Like, what do you bring to this? Nothing necessarily. And I do think that his weird ability to be with Jacks and stand up for Jacks really was a pitfall for him too. And I think this episode, we thought, just to use your analogy, Janet was just to be. just kind of coasting along the ocean floor for a while. We didn't really expect much from her.

She dipped out a little bit here and there. Jason joined her on the ocean floor and then fell into the Marianas Trench. I was going to say that one, too. It's just bizarre the way that he's done that. And I don't think he was ever, he was never held in some high regard. We never really liked Jason. We would just have those questions of, he was just there.

Why are you with Janet? You seem like you're a normal person. You seem like you have a good head on your shoulders. This year we find out why he's with Janet. If you at the end of this episode have to be the person that Janet is telling to calm down, there's probably a problem in there. I'm going to assume

there's an issue in there. And there's definitely an issue with your marriage. And we're not rooting for any failed marriages here. Never. We never do. But if you're going to go after Danny and Nia and say you guys act like your life is perfect, we see a lot of cracks in your armor for your marriage that you're not sharing

instead you're going the other direction and getting tattoos of your rings put on. You think it's like a funny little bit You think it's a cute little moment for your marriage and you get to talk about people being online and being mean to you. In reality, the rest of us are looking at that, like, what's going on, guys? I got something to say about that later. Don't worry. But, yeah, I think I'm probably more on your team with this than you probably thought I would be.

I'm okay with running it back with them. I'm kind of seeing where they're at. I don't think they need Janet or Jason by any means, so I don't want people to think I'm saying that. They're not necessary. I think the show would be fine without them because of the rise of somebody like Zach because we know that Jesse's got it in them to be a good evil person

you know, he might take it too far every once in a while especially with Michelle. Jesse Fan Club. Jesse Fan Club, number one, right here. That's me. But I think there is obviously a lot there. We just have to see what we have, honestly, with Al Jax. Yeah, I agree. But let's dive into the finale and we start out with Janet Lala, Michelle, and Brittany. I know.

It's so tough to, like, be a podcaster for this show when Lala and Sheena pop up because I immediately, my brain turns off. Yeah, I agree. I don't want to be part of it. Sosa is a cute name, though. I like the name Sosa. I like Sosa. No, that's pretty solid. Everybody loves Sosa.

The sad moment that comes from this for me is, you know, they're all now looking at this baby. Everyone's getting baby fever again. Like, who I didn't think I wanted another one, but now I kind of do. Michelle starts talking about maybe having a baby with Aaron. They have since broken up. they are no longer together. So I would love to know why. If it's because he's too much of a bitch boy to, like, be with somebody and deal with Jesse, that's kind of funny to me.

But I do feel bad. I wonder if she cheated on him. Do. We are not. Wait, wait. We are not saying that that happened. Okay. She's been going on hikes with a jelly guy, a jam guy.

Got a new jam guy. She's moved on from Honey to do. jam the natural progression the big difference between peanut butter or jammas so they're talking brittany gives a jack's update and i actually liked lala's chiamen here because you know she's the breadwinner obviously jack said that he's going to go after alimony from her and lala's like well of course he doesn't have money cocaine's an expensive habit i'm like there you go nicely done actually i didn't mind i actually as far as the scenes go with the vpr people Be careful.

This was tolerable. All I said was tolerable. I know, but yeah, you just got to be careful. I'm not saying come back to the show. I'm not saying sign them up, Alex, you dick. I'm simply saying this was a tolerable seat. Sheena at the end is proof why they should not be involved in the show. It's just Sheena and Brock together.

Brock can go fucking kick rocks. What a loser. I mean, Sheena's a lot of people are saying. and we talked about this last night in our live show with her book, her tell-all, whatever, fuck it is. A lot of people were like, oh, yeah, she's off the show, she's writing a book, she's just trying to make money from that.

I see it very differently. I think it's an application. I like your theory. Give our audience your theory. I liked it. So I really do think I think that Sheena's book is not a tell-all. I'm done with reality TV. I'm just going to pop up here and there on different things. I think it's a full-blown

application to be on the Valley. This is what I can bring. I've got a cheating scandal with Brock that I can talk about. I've got you know, we're probably going to have another baby at some point, I'm sure. She probably moved out of that rinky dink little house that we used to see at VPR all the time. And worst of all, what does Jesse and Michelle's relationship have to do with the Sheena Tell All? She wants to get ahead of it because there's other things coming out. Jesse cheated on Michelle and I've got the story.

That has nothing to do with your VPR days. That has nothing to do with you individually. We don't really know if you and Michelle are that close. We see even scenes together because Michelle needs people to fucking film with. But otherwise, what is it? It's so that she can bring things to the valley. Like, I've got all these things that I can bring to the valley. Please sign me up.

It's an application. That's all of this. And I didn't see it that way until, because I was on the other page, obviously, where it's like, okay, well, you're going to bite the hand that feeds you. LVP is not going to have you back. She's an EP on the show. When you said that, I was like, ooh, and that's further proof because if you look at Doty as a prime example, Doty has been outspoken against LVP since her VPR days. And she has not pulled punches.

She's very open about it. But LVP is a businesswoman and recognized that Doty would be great for the Valley, put their differences aside, signed her up. She's now rightfully one of the stars of the show. Last season, it was bizarre that she only got, like, that was so crazy that she got such little screen time. But she's taken a rightful place this season, proving that LVP will put things aside for good TV. I think Sheena's leaning on that. The difference is, Sheena is not Doty, nor will she ever be Doty.

She doesn't have that kind of star power on the screen. But I do truly believe that in Sheena Shea's mind, she does have that kind of star power. I also completely deny the existence of Brock cheating on her in San Diego. He probably cheated on her. But I think the story is bullshit. Oh, interesting. I think it's bullshit. I think she looked at Brock and said, now you can contribute to our family.

I'm going to lie about you cheating and put it in my book. People are going to talk about my book and we're going to make more money from that. That's a good way to do it. You just have to take one for the team. Nobody's going to go on YouTube and watch you build a chicken coop and make us money that way. But if I say that you cheated on me and I've got these, like, crazy stories about it, people might buy the book and talk about it more. And we can potentially get on the valley. So that's how Brock's going to be able to contribute to the family and not be a deadbeat anymore.

Yeah. About damn time. He's still a deadbeat in a different country, but, you know, at least in USA, it's a deadbeat here. He's a deadbeat in a whole other continent. Yeah, right? But anyway, they do a little Hawaii recap. and it's moments like this where Brittany just reminds me what a horrible friend she is.

And she brings up to Janet. She's like, well, they do not like you, Janet. Ha, ha, ha. The way that she talks to Janet about these things because she likes to try to say that she's middle of the road, Switzerland, whatever. The way she's talking to Janet is supportive. It is, I'm on your side.

This is just what's going on. The way that she talks to Zach and Doty is dismissive and I don't want to talk about this. Yeah. Those are very important distinction. because when you have Doty getting upset, when you have Zach lose it at the end because of their friendship or their failing friendship,

these are the moments where it drives me nuts that Brittany goes to confessionals like, I don't want to get involved and this and now. It's like, you just told Janet to her face that they don't like her and then gave her reasons why. But you can't then claim neutrality. She does the same thing.

I'll watch what happens live too because everybody, it's a burning question now and everybody's now aware of it. We were aware of it very early. She's just not a good friend. And she's never been a good friend. We've called that for years since VPR. She's never really been a good friend to anybody.

She just kind of floats with whoever. And she never really has an answer as to why she does it. She kind of says something at the end of this episode to the tune of like, Janet's never been a bad friend to me. So why would I be a bad friend to her? That's not the tune of. She said that verbatim. That's not exactly the right thing to say.

Not at all. Supporting your other friends because she's being an asshole to your other friends. She just never sees it that way. And I don't even know. I've been trying to rack my brain about what ulterior motives she might have. Like, what does Janet offer? Clearly, it's not money. She lives.

I don't want to go down that road. But, like, clearly she doesn't have all this money and power and stuff that you would be clinging on to. And then we can be like, all right, that kind of makes sense. Instead, it's like, what, she's nice to you. She talks shit with you here and there. She gives you gossip. I don't really know exactly what it is.

I think in Brittany's brain, she actually does think that. Like, I think what she gave us was her true thoughts. I think it's a combination. of that and I think that she believes Janet holds a higher stature in the group than she actually does Yeah I think she is under the It's dumb as shit. It is but I think she's

under the impression that Janet doesn't take shit and Janet's good at defending herself and it's like from the viewer standpoint none of that is true. She just digs these holes deeper and deeper by saying horrible things. There's I've got the workings of a theory I like a good working theory. Yeah

and I think it's not going to come to fruition until the end of the reunion. But But there's a weird thing with Jacks with Janet and Jason as well. Oh, they're in cahoots. But wouldn't Brittany also be in cahoots with some of it, too? Where now I'm starting to weirdly think maybe they had a weird like couple relationship on the side that we didn't see where it was very heavily produced. And that's what it was last year. And it was coming out in a very apparent way with Janet.

But obviously all the shit that happened with Jackson and Brittany, it's like, well, we're going to focus on that. Janet's a, Janet's an asshole. But we're going to focus on this. This episode in particular, with the end of it, just kind of brought my attention to that. Like, you're saying all of the same shit that Jason was saying, the same shit that Janet's saying. And it's almost verbatim what we had a conversation about Danny and Nia earlier in the season. And you were away at rehab. So now you're having that conversation.

Yeah, rehab. So now you're having that conversation. Now you're bringing that up. And it's the same thing. And Janet and Jason don't get involved in it because now Jacks is involved in it. So who's the one who's actually thinking this? It's probably Jacks. It's probably Janet.

are they teaming up? Is Brittany involved in that? And she just doesn't want to like play into it too much. I don't know exactly. But I do want to see how they all interact at the reunion because it does seem like they've all kind of sat down and had like a mini alliance going. Wait, I didn't get charged for my donut. It was free with this Tim's rewards points. I think I just stole it. I'm a donut stealer. Ooh. Earn points so fast, it'll seem too good to be true. Plus, join Tim's rewards today and get enough points for a free donut, drink. or timbits. With 800 points after registration, activation, and first purchase of a dollar or more, see the Tim's app for details at participating restaurants in Canada for a limited time.

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And then they worked themselves back into a tizzy because they realized, Ooh, this could be a storyline. Actually, we are mad about it again. I think a similar thing happened before the season because we have evidence now that Jacks had said to Danny, like, I'm coming for you this year. I'm going to take you down. You and Nia, like your perfect life, fuck that, whatever.

So I do believe that if you look at the way that that group is moving, the Js, the Js, the J group, how they're moving. It is so shockingly similar how they speak about it. I think there was a preseason meeting between the Jays, And I think they sat down. They said, Danny and Nia got by too easy last year. It's time to hone in on them. That's going to be our storyline.

We're going to take them down, take down the perfect couple, which is in turn a giant projection of both of their marriages because they're so fucking miserable with their partners. So I think that this was a way for them to take down the happy couple, try to make themselves feel better about their miserable lives. I think Brittany was a party to it. Yeah. I think she heard it. I think she listened to what they were saying.

but also said, I'm friends with them. I'm not going to get involved. I'm not going to say anything, but I'm not going to be the one that's throwing stones. I believe that all of that happened before the season, and we watched it play out. What they didn't plan on was one. Jack's going to a facility. Jack's going to a facility. Jacks also didn't plan on the fact that people were really legitimately going to turn on in this season

and really want him off the show. I think Janet and Jason misunderstand their role and how they're received on this show. And I think that they were ban. thanking on more people supporting them. And I think it got about halfway through the season. They were so far in, they got blinded and went full throttle. And now they're in this predicament. Yeah, I think there's something there.

And again, I do want to see how they all interact and how they, obviously, most of episode two of the reunion is probably going to be all around Danny. Yeah. I don't really care for the clips that I saw already. And we can talk about that at the end with whatever is going on with the reunion. But it's going to be interesting. Because if they all team up and then you actually see Jackson, Brittany kind of working together to go against Danny and Nia, that's going to be weird. That's going to be very weird because you guys are getting a divorce.

It's a very tumultuous relationship. It's very polarizing. It's incredibly in the public eye. Everybody hates this. And we don't want to see you guys working together. And if you guys show any semblance of we talked about this and we're taking them down at the reunion, that's going to be fucked up. I agree. I agree.

And I think it's also fucked up that Dan is going to have to take center stage and be displayed as this evil. Yeah. alcoholic when you actually have that on the other side in Jax's I think and I don't know if jacks is even going to be at the reunion yes he is uh-huh okay I didn't know if they knew at that point that he wasn't going to be back okay I think they talk about it a little bit like he the clip that I saw is somebody's talking about how he was reacting to the things that were going on in the off season and then therefore like throughout the season and Brittany even said that Jax was doing this because he wasn't sure what he was

was going to be if he was even going to come back for the third season okay i got so they do have an idea i don't think they know for sure that he's out though okay all right well let's keep moving because we're still in the first scene yeah in 20 minutes but janet brings up i hate when they and maybe it's because we grew up in philly and you know not to be like oh philly's so tough but they just we talk differently like we talk a lot of shit so you don't really take it that seriously it drives me crazy when she brings up what Doty had said to her. She said, she called me a whore. She threatened to hit me.

She called me a fan. The fact that fan is lumped in with those two is really fucking fucking clear to me. Yeah. It's crazy. Clearly, none. Like, she's not going to hit you. No. Okay? She's never hit anybody. She's not going to fucking hit you. A horror is just like a generic thing that

she threw out there. Jesse called his ex-wife a horror. Correct. Multiple times. Not that that's okay. But they've moved on. It's just, it's funny that she's trying to place so much emphasis like she was the they said these horrible unforgivable things it's like she was pissed off because you were being an asshole and she said some shit walking away and then she's like i would love her to hit me i would love her to hit me so that they take her to jail and they put her engagement ring in a baggie until the next day it's like ooh you really showed them and then for her to

fucking say this is funny because the irony is so fucking blatant that i can't believe that she even said this she's like i hope every time she looks at her engagement ring she reminds her of me. No. Every time you and Jason look at your shitty tattoos on your ring finger, you will think of Doty because you legitimately got a tattoo because Doty brought up a rumor that nobody believes. Doty got engaged with an actual engagement ring. You idiots were so insecure and trying to hide something that you got your bodies inked for life. Yeah. It was such a throwaway comment. Kristen even admitted that it was a throwaway comment that nobody believed, including her, that she just wanted to give you a little taste of your own medicine

because of what you were doing to Danny India. You should have just stuck with what it was in the beginning and laughed it off. Yep. If you had laughed it off and moved forward and didn't have your little meeting afterwards, like, ooh, we could do something with this. Maybe this is our storyline.

We go after, I'm already mad at Kristen. Kristen's mad at me, but I don't have anything on her. I can hold this against her the whole time. No, you already laughed it off. And everybody saw you laugh it off. So you can't now turn it around and then go even further by getting that tattooed. That's insane.

It's just so stupid for somebody, who very clearly is a fan, somebody who very clearly understands how these shows work, you clearly are making the wrong choice at every turn. It's so stupid. Yeah, it was so funny to hear

say, I was like, I can't believe you're trying to play that card. I want to move on, but look, I'm a little tired from last night, a little groggy from the show, and I've got something,

I need a little pick me up right now. So I'm just going to grab, uh, grab a quick magic mind. Yeah, I'll join you. Uh, because these things always pick me right back up. I can't believe I forgot to take it this

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The funny thing is, like I listen to Pete Holmes a lot and I brought him up before, but like, he raves about Magic Mind. And I was like, all right, it can't be that great because he's like, this is life changing. it just wakes you up. It makes you so focused. And in this business, you know, we have a lot of shows to watch. So we got to stay focused on these things. But the first time I tried it, I was like, whoa. And then I tried it like three or four days in a row. And the effects kind of build up. And by the fourth day, it completely zones you in. You completely lock in and focus on whatever you're doing. As somebody in like the fitness industry, I believe in, you know, Ashwaganda. I love the effects of that. It has it in here. It's just a quick shot. And like, you said you can mix it, you can have your coffee, you can have your magic mind, you don't have to substitute anything. I love my coffee in the morning. So it's like the best duo that wakes me up for my day and just gets me locked in. If it's five o'clock after a long day, we got to record, bang, magic mind, locked in. That's the way to do it. Yeah, they reached out to us a couple of

weeks ago. We've worked with them before. I was so excited that they wanted to work with us again. They're such a great company to work with. And again, I knew exactly what to expect. They sent us a bunch of shots. Within a couple of days, I just started feeling so much better. They're an actual product that even when we're not sponsored by them, I still want to go get some. Yes. I still want to make sure that it's part of my morning routine. And it's just the best. And right now, they're having their 50% sale. It's their biggest discount that they've ever had. And it's the best way to do it. And because of that, it is the best time to go and try Magic Mind right now. Because like I said, our audience is going to get 50% off of your first subscription through the link, QR code, and

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And now we can actually tackle the rest of this episode, which is really all the matters right now. Yep. and I needed that to get through the Jacks nonsense because we're about to start getting into it. You get Luke Jason and they are headed over to Jack's. It's not a Bachelor pad, but I am a Bachelor. It's my Bachelor pad.

Go fuck yourself in the ear. This scene was brutal and I love the fact that they get to the roof after, you know, walking up seven flights of steps. Schwartz is there. Of course he is. He doesn't stay, which is good. Yeah. Probably a good move by Schwartz.

It's so brutal. Like that whole setup is. so sad, like, two divorced, like, 40-year-old men that just lean on each other and, like, these sad condos that are, again, Bachelor pads, but. You think Schwartz is happy? I mean, I kind of hope so. Oh, no, that wasn't like a... No, I thought you meant, like...

You think he's happy that Jacks moved in there. I think part of him is, and I think part of him isn't. I think that his, you know, the dark side of Schwartz, like, part of him is like, ooh, the duality of Schwartz. The duality of Schwartz and the other side that he is cognizant of him fucking his life up. Yeah. I think that part of him's like, damn it, this could be bad. Yeah.

But I kind of get the sense too. And all I needed was just him on the roof like, hey guys, and then leaving. Bye. Yeah. Yeah. Perfect amount of Schwartz. But the minute they get up there, mind you, Jax has been on a big kick about Danny and Danny's drinking. It's even more so this episode.

The minute they get to the rooftop, he's like, beers. You just got out of fucking. You want to claim that you just got out of rehab. The first thing you do is offer beers. It's fucking ridiculous. But Jesse arrives. And they're recapping Britney and everything. Well, wait, I think that's a little unfair because drinking's not his problem.

All right, anger is. Yeah. He didn't offer them anger. Yeah, or cocaine, I guess. So growth. What fucking moron. You guys want any anger? I got some on ice.

I got plenty of anger bottled up. That's my problem. What a douchebag. But they're recapping Britney and everything's been going on there. And I knew we weren't getting the whole story. And that's what sucks or Jackson is on the screen. it's not fun. Why he's not good for TV is because it's a completely different narrative that you know is wrong. And he's like, you know, she called me every name in the book. And then

she's texting every day about the house. She's sending me pictures of the flowers. Like, stop calling me. And then fucking Jason, Captain Enabler, is like, oh, she's breadcrumbing you. You're getting breadcrumbed by him. Oh, that's tough, man. I'm really sorry for you. Like, fuck off, dude. How are you so far up this guy's ass? But you want to tear Danny down? Yeah. It makes no goddamn sense. It's so weird that like these are the I guess if you had three angels or devils on your shoulders and your jacks, you've got Luke who makes the most sense, who's actually just trying to speak some sense into the situation that we're having right now.

Talking logically, hey, yeah, you do probably have to do this and that and whatever just to try to get back into her good graces. Not about your house, about your actions. Yeah. And then you've got Jesse somewhere in the middle where every once in a while you see Jesse like, yeah, I don't know. Can't defend that one. Towards the end of the episode, you see it a little bit more where it's like,

dude what the fuck is this can't defend this and then you've got jason who we never would have actually thought that jason would have been on the other side the complete enabling side of yeah that's fucking tough man how are you going to handle that like just getting drunk in your your new bachelor pad like bachelor pad's pretty sweet it's pretty cool you can just hang out here like this is great just get your stuff together i'm just so happy that you have all of your furniture in here all the decor is up like you should not be complimenting this guy i know he's at if he's your friends he's at like the maybe not the lowest point but he's at a really low point in his life maybe you just show him a little bit of niceties but once he starts talking and starts swinging

this into brittany's fault you do have to stop him check him check him for his own good that's what you're supposed to do with people like us yeah you can't just be like it's gonna be okay buddy you got to check your friends if you actually care about them then put them in their place and say yo you're missing the entire point yeah it drives me nuts to watch And they're like, where's Danny? And he's like, well, I'm serving alcohol, so I assume he can't be here. It's like, do you understand who you are? That, it's such a wild sentence, too.

It's the craziest shit I've ever heard. I'm serving me who's now, well, I don't even. A week out of sober anyway. But, yeah, I mean, alcohol is not his problem. He's serving alcohol, so he assumes Danny can't be here. It's the most wild statement that he's made. And that's saying a lot. Do you think he's going to get shit-faced drunk on your roof with this crew?

and then grab your ass? I don't know what is. Grab Jacks' ass? Yeah, he's going to grab Jacks his ass. It just makes no sense. It's such a, such a clouded statement. And they start going further in. And Luke, again, voice of reasons, like, what's, like, where did this come from?

Yeah. Like, what the fuck is this? And I know exactly where it came from. He's fresh out of rehab, hard quotations. And he's trying to place the blame elsewhere. And he heard that Danny's getting shit for drinking. And he's like, boom, I'm going to. latch onto that and keep throwing these bombs at him.

So people stop thinking about me. And Luke calls him out. He's like, well, he's two-faced. How is he two-faced? The funny thing is Jacks isn't even smart enough to do it from the, the old trope. Like, I just got out of rehab. I know what I'm doing. You guys are just all fucked up.

I can't. I'll get into that way. Danny, I, dude, I just got out of rehab. You need rehab. Like, I can help you. He's not even smart enough to do that. No. Which is saying something because the people who do that are idiots already.

They are somehow dumber than that. Yep. Where now it's, I've got my problems figured out. I've got my anger problems. I can still drink here and there. Danny can't drink at all. He just can't drink at all. Like, you're not even smart enough to bring it up to the next level and try to do the whole

therapy thing on them. Try to use all those words that you learned in the first two days that you were actually there and then try to move forward and just pin him as an alcoholic. You're not doing any of that because you're not even smart enough to do that. No, because he's a fucking moron. And he's like bringing up examples. He's like, you know, he gets shit-faced at my bar and he's going to get sued. And he blanket statements intentionally.

He's like, he's feeling up girls. It's like, we know the situation. It was a bad situation. We do not condone it. He talked to the person that he did it to. They want to move on. That is their decision to make. If Jasmine wanted to turn it into something else, different story.

She didn't. She's trying to move on. By saying he's doing it frequently or more than once, sue him, Danny. Fucking sue him for libel. Sue him, sue Janet. Yeah, just sue them all. Seriously. And Jason enables it again.

I was honestly kind of both bummed out and flabbergasted that this statement was made. Even by Jason, he goes, you know, if Jacks makes a mistake, the whole group discusses it. But if you call out Danny, you get attacked. Danny and Jacks are not the same person. They're not even remotely the same person. Jason was so excited to make that comment, which made it so much worse. Like, he was smiling. He had a shit-eating grin when Jacks started going down that path.

And he was like, oh, cool. Now I've got Jacks to help out with this. This has nothing to do with you. Zero. What's the worst thing that drunk Danny has done to you? Oh, it's properly label your wife as an asshole. And a snake. And a snake.

Doesn't seem too wrong right there. Nope. You wouldn't even give him a chance to really apologize, even though he wasn't going to apologize for that. He nor should he. He was apologizing for the time and place, not for the content, which you still didn't even get to. because you're not allowing him to apologize for it.

Yes. Meanwhile, he's allowed to apologize to Jasmine and Melissa over here for the things that he actually did. He actually wronged them. He actually wronged them. And he was able to sit down with them multiple times to get through it. A serious situation,

a thing that he needed to apologize for and try to make amends for. He doesn't really need to do that. But for whatever reason, you're up on your ivory tower, like, I'm not even going to let him come over here. I'm going to have a team up moment with Jacks.

And we're really going to... You're not even trying to help them. I think that's probably the worst. part now I just realize that you're not even coming from an angle of you're enabling jacks trying to help him when you're talking about danny you're just fucking crushing the dude trying to skewer him you're trying to destroy his life because he was mean about your wife not mean to your wife mean to your wife and because of something that had nothing to do with you that you shouldn't be butting your head into you're not trying to reach out to someone that you've known for a long time be like hey man like

are you good this is a fucking problem like can you try to figure it out like this is is making everybody uncomfortable if you want to be friends with us like you got to stop doing that there's no scenes there are no scenes where that happens there's no text messages where it's like hey man can we come meet up instead you're just like you're a fucking asshole you got to stop drinking now i'm just going to talk about it with jacks and janet what what is this it's so nuts dude it's so nuts he's such a pussy but apparently danny hasn't drank in three weeks according to luke they went out and he was drinking water and also luke had noticed because he's paying attention And it was like, I noticed you didn't drink in Hawaii.

Danny's like, no, I haven't had a drink in a few weeks. And Jacks, I don't believe that. I don't care what you believe. I don't believe. Your word means shit. Your word means nothing. Jacks who got out of rehab and went to Jacks's and probably banged the waitress from Jacks's. Yes.

And got hammered. And then also tried to tell everybody that he was drinking water or club soda or whatever. And he was secretly sneaking vodka. Correct. Sure. Jaxi wants to go and watch what happens live and claim 200 plus days of sobriety when he looks like he's fucked up in that moment. Now, we got to call out the math on this one because he was drinking in this episode.

Oh, to time up that and watch what happens live episode. That we can do that pretty easily. You ordered a vodka soda and you said that you had been drinking and you're like, it's been 10 minutes since I finished by that. I haven't drank in an hour. It's like, what are you doing? Like, it's just so goddamn frustrating. And he gives a speech about accountability, bro.

Like, Jack's Taylor gives a speech about don't preach. reach without a clean slate. Okay, fine. Then shut the fuck up right now. Try to clean your sleeve. You're doing. You can't clean your sleep because you don't want to because you assume that you don't have a problem.

You're just mad. That's dumb. It's just dumb. I've got much more saved up for later. I'm trying to like woo saw until we get there. The magic mind helped. Let's talk about Jesse and Michelle in a very nice scene. This was a nice little reprieve that I think we needed, given where this episode goes.

but Jesse feels good about Hawaii. I think we all saw Hawaii. It went as well as it probably could. You know, he was talking to Aaron a lot. They seemed to at least come to a cordial place. You know, Aaron was like, I love her, and he said, I'm happy for you. Hit pause on whatever you're listening to and hit play on your next adventure. This fall get double points on every qualified stay.

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know.com for details. Please play responsibly. Michelle, she's glad that they were able to talk and kind of smooth things over. And even Michelle's like, I can see a friendship down the road, much further down the road. My problem is that I can't trust you. And they were able to both communicate kind of what they need from the other person to be able to coexist and more importantly co-parent. And I think that's a massive step forward because on one side Jesse's like I need you to chisel off just a little bit of resentment

I and this is incredible self-awareness I'll give him credit there I need to chisel off some irrationality yeah that's kind of perfectly he was doing a weird like almost like mediating the the conversation that he was involved in yeah he was trying to get her and she didn't

she did I guess once but she didn't really agree to a lot of the stuff but when he was saying like I need to do this and you need to do that, or I would like it if you could do that. She wasn't really biting on that. So he was doing the, like, I'm giving you an option here where you can take a little bit of accountability and saying, like, we're both just trying to win. We're just button heads.

We're doing this. And they say it in the reunion, too. We're both just trying to butt heads and come out as the winner. And we can't do that for Isabella's sake. And he's just trying to, like, navigate that. Like, hey, you can take a little bit of responsibility here. And she does to some extent, but really she's putting it all on him. And it's like, okay.

That's how you took it That's how I took it But she Fucking Jesse fan There were so many moments Where Jesse could have just Completely popped off Jesse by the way

This was disingenuous In my opinion Oh was it I didn't I believe Some of it But I believe that It's hard to tell

Without knowing his girlfriend I agree I just think he's cognizant Of this is Getting close to If not the finale Yeah maybe He's cognizant of that

I think this is a played up moment I believe some of the sentiment I do believe that he wants to move forward. I do believe that he's exhausted. All of those things I believe, the tears, like, getting choked up and his voice was wavering before they really even got into it. I thought it was played up. Oh, okay. Yeah, I don't think it was played up at all. I think there was real men of motions. You don't want guys to cry. That's okay. I can cry all the time. You're the one that doesn't cry.

I think it's really tough because there was this and when he was talking to Jacks about, like, you just have to find once you start to love someone again, you can let go. When he said that, I'm like, are you in love with your girlfriend right now? And that's what you're saying, because you're able to kind of bury the hatch a little bit. I think they did break up, but maybe they're back together. I don't know. I think they are back together currently. I don't know. So I have no idea. But yeah, between that conversation and this conversation with Michelle, I kind of put it together. It seems like maybe he's in a better place with the girl that he's dating. And that helps him, I guess, move forward with Michelle a little bit. So maybe, but it's really tough to say because she's not on the show. And he doesn't, really give updates on the show either about his current relationship. Okay. So I'm just, I'm grasping at straws to try to understand, but maybe it is all just played up with the camera. But I will say, regardless of that, they're able to reach a point where he takes accountability.

He's like, the divorce was not your fault. It's not my fault. It was our fault. I think that's a massive statement for both of them to take into account. I didn't think Michelle was going to take that. I didn't either. I thought she was just going to be like, no, it is your fault. No, but I'm glad that it was a mutual understanding because they,

They both fucked up. So I agree with that sentiment. And they're able to hug and crack a joke. I think Michelle's even trying to figure out how to navigate him. I think she's hired too. Yeah, she's got to be exhausted. He shows that he's exhausted. He told us a million times.

So maybe she's tried to just hit a point where like she can bite her tongue. You know what I mean? Like this means nothing if we get into a huge fight right now, it's just going to set us back again. If I don't say anything and I just kind of agree with you and then we move forward, it might be nice. I might have a nice, Jess. It was nice. Yeah, it was. They laughed with each other.

This is not really comparable, but he's now best friends with Luke and Doty. I know. So if that could happen, maybe you guys can be friends and Aaron can be friends, although you're not together anymore. If Luke and Doty can be the most stable couple in this show, anything can happen. He's not going to drive to the Valley for them, but, you know, it's nice to know that he can drop his daughter off. Let's get to Brittany and Cruz. I like this moment of putting out the mat with the cartwrights. on it you know she might be a shitty friend but she's gone through a lot so to see her finally

separating from jacks is very relieving as an audience member and what does she need like a four-bedroom house for though as a woman as a woman oh as yeah fucking jacks just got a condo shut the fuck like that was and i feel like because he's such a big pile of shit that moment got glossed over people were really talking about that i won't ever forget it he literally said a woman can't handle a four bedroom house. What does she need this for as a woman with a backyard? Maybe she'll start to realize, like, how much it takes to actually own that house. You haven't been there in a year. You're the one that can't take care of anything. Oh, my God. It's so, I thought, you know, frustrating. I thought maybe, like, you know, sending the gardener over and, like, watching you actually

have to pay for that. Like, you'd realize how much it is. You haven't paid any of this. No. She's on the whole. She's paying off your taxes because you're a deadbeat in every facet of the word, And every single facet of your life, you are a deadbeat. And you're going to put it on her. It's crazy. Since the tax thing has come to late, and obviously it was seven months late on the mortgage payment, the fuck did he or the investors get a condo? I don't know how the fuck he got a condo.

That is insane to me. Maybe Alex Baskin paid for it. I don't know. But how did he get that bar? I know Brittany's involved in. And there's other investors. But which of the investors were like, yeah, Jacks needs to like, I looked at his financials, everything looks good, he's in.

Well, no, he didn't put any money in it. I know, but he's just the face in the name of it. Yeah, but there's got to be an equity standpoint at some point. You could definitely get that dumbass to agree. Like, we're going to use your name, image, and likeness, and we're going to pay you a flat rate. Yeah, that's possible. Here's a payout, and we're just going to use the bar. He's there all the time.

Because he wants a place to drink. I wouldn't even let him in there. I wouldn't either. He's going to ruin the bar. You're going to ruin your namesake bar because you're such a garbage person. Change it to Brits. Honestly, might as well. That's a good name.

I would go to Brits. Not a bad name. No, not at all. I don't want to go to Jackson's. Fuck no. But Doty joins. And as we know, she's been on her fertility journey this whole season. Don't worry, everybody, it works out.

Because during these scenes, I get really sad. I have to remind myself it works out. But she just went in a doctor visit, and we find out that Luke has 58 million sperms. Bravo, sir, nicely done. Two sperm visits in one year. Yeah. This is Summerhouse. And we get to find out how many millions of cells.

sperms you have. Yeah, Kyle had a lot of sperm too. It makes me want to go do it. You know what I mean? I just want to know how many sperms I got, you know? Why don't you let us know? Maybe I'll do it. Go do that and let us know. A little behind the scenes? Nope, not behind the scenes. You can just tell us. You don't want me to take a camera with me? I'm gonna keep going now. I made me on easy. Yeah, we did. That was the first time had that. Not like that. At the the end of the show, I turned and I like, I went to the bathroom and I came back because I really had to pee. I came back and we took the pictures and I turned around the

dude was like right in my face with the camera. Yeah, so how to go? How to go? How did you think the show went and I'm like you look at the mic I looked at the mic and I was like good it went great good uh was that me putting the mic in my mouth oh Jesus Christ oh my god but I guess Doty got some difficult news because after doing all the tests you started to receive a bunch of emails about the scripts you need to pick up and the hormones and things like that and the word infertile and infertility was all over it uh and I guess your labor fucking horrifying thing to read, I'm sure. Can't imagine.

I can't begin to imagine. But I guess if you are trying to get pregnant for a year or more and it's unsuccessful, you are then labeled as infertile, which is pretty tough. And I can't imagine that is helpful because a lot of this, you know, obviously it's medical, and it's hormonal, things like that. I do firmly believe that a lot of it is your mindset and being positive and hoping for the best. So I would love if we could label it something different. just for the sake of the moms out there trying to get pregnant because nobody wants to

fucking read that no and i thought brittany actually handled herself well for once in this scene like she was supportive of her she's trying to calm her down she was a good shoulder to lean on in the scene yeah and thank god because she's had a tough showing being a friend up until then so she's like manifest manifest all that as we know it all worked out so sad moments guys but it's all worth it yeah because we get the golden egg i forgot about the golden egg. I love the golden egg. I kind of assume that this would happen, but we're starting to run pretty deep and we're not far enough into this episode yet. So let's go ahead and break this bad boy up into a two-part or what do you say? Yeah, give the people what they want. Hell yeah, brother.

But before we do go to that second episode, just a quick reminder, make sure that you get yourself some magic mind. Go to magicmind.com slash bros S-50. That's Bros.S-50 at the end of magicmind.com. Get yourself 50% off today. Do it. That's all I got. You got anything else? Nope. All right.

I'll stay tuned for episode two. Goodbye. Summer movies, Hello Fall. I'm Anthony Devaney. And I'm his twin brother, James. We host Raiders of the Lost Podcast, the Ultimate Movie Podcast, and we are ecstatic to break down

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