Bros & Shows - The Bachelorette Boys Tell All (Bachelorette Full Recap)

Episode Date: August 29, 2024

What's up Brose? We had back to back Bachelorette episodes and we had ourselves a little tell all. In this episode, the majority of the contestants are back to tell their side of the story. Before we get there, we get the conclusion of the previous episode and Jenn confesses that she is in love with Devin, allowing him to stay in the game. Most of them are just happy to be there and Jenn is happy to see them. Johnathon snags the first invite to Bachelor in Paradise. Hakeem follows suit after having the worlds largest spider placed on him, securing his ticket to the beach. We get to hear from some fan favs, Sam N. the love virgin makes his triumphant return. Tomas N (nobody needed to see him again) comes to the realization that maybe he shouldve kept Jenn the main thing and not Devin. The whole crew agrees that the drama was ridiculous and primarily rooted in Sam M. who gets called to the hot seat. Although his performance wasn't the worst, Jenn ROASTS him in front of everyone and says while he's saying he's taken accountability and learned from his mistakes, its quite clear that he hasn't. She goes as far to say she feels sorry for whoever he ends up with. This was such a fun episode to watch and once again, we love recapping these shows. Just having ourselves a silly goose time.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Oh, man, it's 8 o'clock. And so that'll make it a... I don't need the spotlight. I shine just fine. Hi, I'm Karma. And yes, I am a bitch. Brov Bros. Good afternoon, everybody, and welcome back to another episode of Brav Bros.

Your favorite podcast from The Bros for everybody. For whoever wants to listen, I'm your co-host, Steel Rock. also joined as always by the one and only tell all mcgall i'm glad you went yesterday yeah did waterfall mcgall yesterday now your tell all mcgall that's fine that works for me i was i was really hoping you were going to use a little tell all in there yeah i couldn't think of anything other than mcgall but tell all because it is a bro z episode b r o s e why because we are doing the bacheloret we got two episodes this week uh last night obviously was the cliffhanger with devon and tonight My God, that was one of my favorite, like, recap episodes ever.

I think they need to do more of these throughout the season. This was fun. Look, I actually can't disagree with you more on that. Oh, well. I love that this is a 10-episode season. It's over next week. No, I like that. This is perfect.

I don't need more. The recaps are fine if it was a, what I thought it was, like a 20-episode season because it's like, oh, yeah, I forgot about that. I didn't forget about anything that they showed tonight. Yeah, but they also didn't. hammer it over the head. I didn't feel like the montages. You know what they did hammer you over the head with?

Main thing, the main thing. No. Secret Lives of Mormon Wives. Let's watch a three-minute trailer. I'm fine with it. I enjoy it, but I've already seen the trailer. I've seen it both.

That's why I posted about it. Yeah, I know. The best takeaway from that trailer was they just left the camera on Hakeem, who was just going wild. He was excited. He was like, what the fuck's going on? I love this. That's all.

I love the little. window at the bottom corner of the screen as things are happening and you get reactions of the people, Thomas N is still salty as fuck. This man is to get over, even Sam M is over Devin. Thomas N is still smirking and making faces

at Devin. Devin's a finalist, you dip shit. You don't get to make fun of him Thomas N. You're not even part of the crowd. And also just another thing, because he pissed me off. Don't shave your beard equal to your jawline. Oh yeah, you always have to go

a little underneath, yeah. Never understand it. Now, to be fair, when I, you know, when I was like 18 and I didn't know what I was doing, I did go in line with my jaw, and I wondered, why does it look so bad? Because you need under a little bit, under, but anybody, it's the Nick Siriani. He did it his first year with the Eagles. He always shaved it right here, and I fucking hated it. Thomas N, don't do that.

It doesn't accentuate your jawline. Everyone, that's the funniest part, is a lot of people don't know what's wrong. They're just, something looks off with the beard. You're like, what, something's not right. I can't pinpoint it, but something's not right. It's because there's no hair under the chin. Well, I chuckled a little bit anyway when Jim was talking to him a little bit later. It's like, if you just paid attention to me, maybe things could have turned out differently.

She actually didn't say turned out differently. She said maybe your journey would have been a little different. Yeah. Like, alluding to the fact that maybe you would have lasted another week or so. I'm not, I mean. But we all know that he wasn't getting any farther. No, he didn't have what it takes to be. a finalist or even a semi-finalist but yeah he definitely would have lasted longer that was the funniest

her acknowledging that whole thing where it's like yeah dipshit who the fuck pulls away the dude to talk to the dude yep it's the bachelorette you dumb dumb and i love and we'll get into it a little bit more but i like that they they all kind of turned around on devon like a lot of them were barking a little bit during it but i feel like more people had his back this episode than they did when they were all there. I think a lot of the guys from the very, very beginning had his back. Now, we didn't get, there was some missing people in there. Austin wasn't there. That's right. I wish I could figure out who else was missing, but I mean, the majority of the first 25 or the first 12 or however many she got rid of the first time. I think she got rid

out of 10 on the first night. The majority of those people, it was really just Ricky was there. You know who was a swing and a miss? By Jen is Ricky. He was great. Well, Ricky was all, he was great, but he was also like talking about how many girls he hooks up with. Oh, that was Ricky from the, yeah, that was his problem there. He was the fact, oh, he was the ghoster. I liked Ricky. Ricky was awesome. Yeah.

Yeah, okay. Yeah, that was Ricky's problem. Ricky did this whole thing where he pulled out a whiteboard and did like math by Ricky or something. Yeah. He ate a lot of charisma. I liked him a lot and he showed up tonight. And I feel like once Jonathan sat down with with Jesse a little bit later, I'm like, oh, that's what they're doing. That's why they're all trying to show up right now.

You still have people who are resting on their laurels like Sam M. He's like, I can probably get to Bachelor in Paradise, just being me. He probably can. I'm not going on him that much. He's going to be like a sneak attack. Not going at all. Rickie, Hakeem, you know, those guys, people that showed up tonight, they were like, I'm still playing for something here.

I knew that going into it. You didn't? No. Oh, yeah, I knew that that's the next thing. That's the, I didn't know who was going. I just know that some of these gentlemen will appear. He did not expect a team to get invited. but hey, good for him.

I didn't either, but I will say this, after watching his montage a little bit and then him during this episode, there's something about him. I was happy that he got the ticket to Bachelor of Paradise. They need to go full circle with Brett and be like, you know what? We fucked up.

Yes. We made you look bad. You go to Bachelor and Paradise. I couldn't believe he didn't get the invite. Did you hear the crowd's reaction? Yeah. Did you see all the signs? Yes.

Signs were my favorite part of it. I'm here. I know. God, at one point it was just a sign. I guess there was something really. written on the other side, but they flipped it around and it just said gin. Jen. Plain, plain, not even an exclamation point, just Jen.

Jen. Jen. And plain black lettering. Jen. Jen. I do have a theory about the signs. Okay. They are all very, very similar as far as lettering.

Oh, they hand them out as soon as you walk in, yeah. You think they hand them out or do you think they get there early and that's like a fun drinking game and you get to make a sign. That's what I thought. I like that better. I like it a lot better. Yeah, I think that's a fun premise. That's a really fun premise.

I wouldn't be surprised because it's a lot of the same thing. They have to vet them, obviously, so maybe they already had them pre-made. Yeah. Man, I want... But maybe not, though, because if they handed out a sign that just said Jen on it, that's funny. It's kind of funny. It's funnier if it's funnier if ABC did it.

It's funnier if somebody was like, we get to make signs. It's like, oh, fuck. I'm just going to put Jen. I don't like making signs. I'm not artsy. I haven't even watched this season. Who's a Bachelor at? Jen.

All right. Jen. Two ends. Oh, my bad. Shit. But let's jump in. And, you know, we've already talked about a little bit. But the funniest.

part to me, right out of the gate, because Grant claims he was in love with Jen, right? And he even says more of this episode. I love Grant. I think he's great. I think he's genuine. He's going to be a phenomenal bachelor. I think that's going to be a great season. But when did he find out pretty soon after he got the boot?

He found out he was being the bachelor, right? I think we talked about this. I think the decision was made before he got the boot. I do too, but I don't know if he knew. That's why he went home when he did. Agree. There were other people that didn't deserve to be there

and Grant was one of them that deserved to be there. Yes. So that was a little funky. I think he found out probably in the car right on the way home. I would imagine it was

very shortly after. My point being, as he phones his mother, doesn't seem that upset about Jen. It's like, guess what? It's like, maybe.

Because Jen, that was a weird one where somebody else when I think Spencer may have gone home that week too. Spencer walked out, did not get any love from Jen, but Grant got a hand.

hold on the way out a little stroll out there maybe jem was the one to tell him oh passing of the torch interesting yeah i like that pregrant you know what i don't want you to be a finalist i don't think that we're going to get there but you're going to be the next bachelor that's a good way to say it off to congratulate you i just my my point was that you know you'd think he'd be a little torn up about losing the love of his life according to him and then he's calling his mom he's like doesn't seem to care it just works out well. Yeah. And again, love Grant. Not knocking him. Just was a funny thing. Plus, then he has a built-in storyline

for when he's The Bachelor. I was on last season. I was in love with Jen. It just didn't work. I told her I loved her, but I didn't get it back. It broke my heart. Now I'm here to find love. Yep. Would you love me? Yeah, that's... Maybe he steals a line from Marcus, where he's like, at the very least, she's leading

me down the right path of finding love. Oh, leading me down the path to find true love. Yep. Confusing. Yeah. Very confusing. Marcus, you're not in love with her. Marcus needs, the fact that Marcus got a rose is brutal for Jonathan after his performance last week. And we're not going to discuss the stuff going on on Reddit. You can go look at that yourself. But there's a lot of weird shit now surrounding him.

I did a deeper dive into that to try to get ready for what's going to come out. It's not great. I'm pretty sure Devin's going to win. Devin has to win. He has to. But that's my whole point. I almost think it's insulting to Devin to even keep Marcus around at this point. because after, okay, let's really dive in.

Let's dive it. Let's just do it because we're just going into it. We are getting into it, yeah. Calling all book lovers, the Toronto International Festival of Authors brings you a world of stories all in one place. Discover five days of readings, talks, workshops, and more with over 100 authors from around the world, including Rachel Maddow, Ketourou Isaku, and Kieran Desai. The Toronto International Festival of Authors,

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during the Volvo Fall Experience event. Conditions supply, visit your local Volvo retailer or go to Explorevolvo.com. We get to see all of the boys, and I just want to highlight Sam N. Not only has the jacket, his denim leather jacket. We don't think it's denim, just to clarify, for any newbies here. He called it a denim jacket. Just want to make sure people don't think we're that dumb. He's a denim version.

He's a denim version. He doesn't know what leather is. Yeah, right. He also has the jersey, which I actually kind of thought was funny. The one that says, Jen's husband. Yeah. Did say ex-husband? He put an X on it, no.

I didn't see that. That is funny. Okay. And he also, he was more composed this episode as well. So I will talk about it later. But Jesse Palmer, what a jokester, this fucking guy. We'll find out next week. J.K.

I was hoping he was telling the truth. I'm not going to lie. We talked about this yesterday. I talked myself into just waiting another week for that, the Devin Cliffhanger to kind of dissolve itself. When he said that I'm like, all right, good. We can just focus on the dudes. and then he fucked with us again, and my heart dropped, and then I got tense. I got tense, too.

I got really tense. I have an emotional connection with Devin. I don't know why. No pun intended, because I do in real life as well. Oh, maybe that's why. Maybe it's just the name. You called him Dev yesterday, I think, too, yeah. I did call him Dev.

I'm married to Dev, so it's hard. It's hard to separate the two. So maybe I have more of a connection with him. It's hard to separate the two? When I'm talking about Devin, the man. yeah it's hard to not drop a dev because i'm so used to saying it that's what i mean okay that's right that's better no i obviously i could separate my wife from a contestant david some very interesting dreams lately i don't know what's going on

devon not the devon you're expecting oh shit you want to go on a fun run what's going on what's going on let's get back to this show we're talking about devon from the show and he goes to talk to talk to Jen. This is the cliffhanger. We've all been waiting for for 24 hours. Yep. And I got tense like you did. And I'm glad that he went in there. I'm glad he had this conversation. She's laced all on the line. He goes, you know what? I'm not in a good headspace. My feelings are all fucked up. But I think that it took her off guard because she was then worried like, oh shit, you're not in love with me? Yeah. Because he didn't go further into it. But when he says

everything. Here's what I'm confused about. And what I'm hoping didn't happen. Okay. And maybe you'll be able to shed some light on it. Did she panic love? Is that a panic love? Oh, God, you can't go home because I really want you to stay, but I'm not in love. But I do love you, you're a freaking idiot. I'm just bad at emotions. No, no. I think the freaking idiot sealed that one for me. That it was legitimate. I think it's legit. Okay. I think it's legit. I think that, God, I can't believe I'm actually going this deep on this fucking show. I think when she looks at Marcus that's similar to what she's used to

for guys that are emotionally unavailable that she's just pulling onto and she's like, this is my normal vibe, this is what I'm going for, this is what I'm used to, so I have no problem saying I love you. Devin, on the other hand, is not what she's used to, so she's scared because he is love bombing her a little bit, but she does

have a lot of feelings and she's not identifying it as love until that moment. She said, well, shit, if you go home then I'm kind of fucked. So it is part of that But in a way that it made her realize No, these feelings are love Wow

Yeah That was good Yeah That was good Fucking leave it to the Bachelorette Yeah To finally break down love It took a long time to get there

Yeah Yeah I would love If your emotions Finally got opened up After 33 years Because you deep dove On to the Bachelorette

Yeah Then you're like Oh I get it now Oh I feel I feel Got a connection with Dev This is what A

all right let's get back to it the bottom line is we now have two finalists that are in love everyone's in love with each other we got a love triangle now officially jonathan unfortunately and i think he knew the skinny before the rose ceremony i was a little tense during that i wasn't sure what was going to happen i think i could have seen marcus going home at that point i wrote down ready for this I wrote Devin Schewen. Yeah. After that conversation, he had to be the first one to get the rest. Absolutely.

I wrote a bit a fucking twist. Jonathan is the clear choice, but in love with Marcus, is what I wrote down. Jonathan is the clear choice. To see what happens there is the clear choice, right? I'm talking about between... I know, but I know where you're saying. I'm saying in the grand scheme of things, Devin's the clear choice. The other two, they're both kind of the same in a way where she...

The way that she explained it to Jonathan when Jonathan goes... home is, you know, it started off as a friendship and, you know, we never really got to, we explored a lot of feelings, but we never got there. That's where you are with Marcus. You're just in a different place. Marcus is still in the same place as Jonathan. True. You're forcing the hands there.

So I feel like that's part of it where it's like, no, Jonathan and Marcus are actually in the same part. You're just in love with Marcus for some reason. Agreed. But I think that the difference is Jonathan's not afraid to feel. yeah Jonathan is new to the feeling Marcus is terrified that's why for me it's like all right

if you're going to try to convince one of these fellows to fall in love with you wouldn't you want to go for the guy that's having this arguably like spiritual awakening as you're going through this process where he's like I sat by the ocean last night in these two chairs and I was like fuck man I'm there I'm so pissed at myself it took me this long

and obviously this is after the fact but regardless when she's with him in that the conjugal visits fantasy suites you just leave it at the visits the CJs yeah what what conjugal that's how you spoke conjugal

did you know that? Yeah but I didn't I thought it was a G until I was going to name last night's episode Conjugal dot dot dot fantasy sweets I didn't do that but I'm just this is how my brain works What are you saying? This is how my brain works

Welcome I don't like using it's a lot of a lot of different directions. There's a lot of cobwebs in here. Yeah, I know, man. It probably smells like alcohol, too. There's a lot happening. Okay, but anyway, where were we?

Oh, Jonathan, I think, wait, stop it. I think Jonathan deserved another week. I think that, like you pointed out, last night's episode, or two nights ago, Marcus essentially broke up with her and reeled it back in to go on for another week. week. I just don't see it, especially because next week they are going to talk to her family. They seem tough. And I don't think Marcus is going to make it through that. No. But then we'll talk about the cliffhanger in a little bit. I mean, it's very obvious, too, because we see the scenes from next week. Devin is sitting down

with her brother, and her brother is saying, yeah, I'm not going to give you my blessing. But it's probably like, it's not. It was a hard stop. There's more to that. Yeah, there's more to that because it's not my place to give her the blessing. It's my mom's. or something like that, whatever. But the conversation that Jen has with her brother is, are you really going to go after somebody who you know is emotionally unavailable? That's Marcus. Yep.

There's no way to, there's no other way to look at that. You know that Devon's emotionally available. Marcus is not. So it's, yeah, whatever. I agree. And I think, we have three hours to think about it next week.

I know, it's a three hour finale. How the fuck? How are we going to review that? I imagine it's going to be that much to discuss. Like one hour of her hanging out with both of them separately. another hour of the family and then an hour of the decision. Well, the decision's live.

Do you not hear that part? It's a live finale. So it's going to be a similar setup to this, but it's going to be an actual episode. Live, live, or filmed to live? Because what we watched tonight or last night, if you're listening, I fucking hate this. What we watched with the Men Tell All was, quote, unquote, live.

But they already had clips from it, so it was filmed like two or three days ago, probably. I don't know. All right, just curious. Yeah, it's a live... How do they keep this shit under wraps? I don't know. I'm sure if you wanted to dig enough, you could find it.

I'm not going to. I hate ruining shows. I don't want to do that, but... Anyway, back to the show. I love that as they're talking, you get the car starting, and that's like the final bell. It's like, well, you gotta get out of here now.

Your car's waiting. But anyway, we get to see all the dudes. We're back at the main stage, back at the tell-all, and Ricky brings up Jonathan's ass again, I'm so, it's funny as shit to me that this, his ass cheeks being out are still a thing. Yep.

We get over it. Well, Ricky went home the first time. What do you want to do? That's all he's got to talk about, I guess. It's the only event that he was there for. He brought it tonight. Yep. Okay, he brought it.

That's all he needed to do. Maybe he gets a Bachelor in Paradise, not who knows. But Brett, our man, our man from day one, we voted for him. Got some justice for Brett. We got, Brett had his moment, and I love that for him. He definitely deserves a spot at Paradise. I think it's bullshit if he doesn't, and I will be taking up arms against ABC.

Don't think I'll win that battle, but I'll keep you posted. If Brett does not get the invite, but I loved getting a peek into his DMs, the one was wild. My leg, my mouth is open, and my legs. My arms are open, my mouth is open, and my legs.

Whoa. The foot one made me laugh. The foot one I totally understood. I know. We have had. So, did you see the recent one? About feet? Yeah, because I mentioned bros and toes

when we were joking about starting a foot finder or whatever the fuck it is or wiki, what is it? I don't know. When we started talking about doing foot content, jokingly, a gentleman reached out, and this is no shade to you, sir. I thought it was funny, whatever your name is, and said, not going to lie,

would totally subscribe to bros and toes, or would be a big subscriber to bros and toes. Big subscriber. Something along those lines. We've got something to think about. when we started doing cameos the first day we got a request with stuff and they wanted to do it under the table they're like we can use paypal or venmo yeah my venmo's flourishing these days but anyway we get a big montage of the dudes like a long one we get sam n in his behavior devon's behavior we get erin's book we get sam m being a hard ass he thinks he looks good and the main thing the main thing montage we get a main thing we get a main thing we get a main thing the main thing montage, which was funny as shit. Ferocious love

all of his fucking one-off lines that he used at nauseam. But let's talk about Aeron and the grenade that he dropped with that with his parting gift to her. I loved and I

justice for Spencer, he deserved to be further along than he got it. He should have been where Jeremy was. Spencer deserved Jeremy. I like Jeremy. Love Jeremy. Gerber. Jerbear. why was that cut uh she did call him jerebert once or twice but i didn't hear that it's part of the bloopers

yeah the bloopers were fucking they were great sure try hard but spencer i'm glad spoke up and we knew he's going to speak up and he's spoken up in the past when he got pushed enough which i like the guy that's like mellow until you fuck with him and he goes in on air and he's like who the fuck are you to act like you know who gen is you come in here like you you know this you know this you know the gist of everything and that you know how dating works better than anybody and who belongs with her and this and that Aaron got checked by his fucking

brother. Yeah. How embarrassing. That's really embarrassing because you our questions leading up to that were what we knew that your brother had a similar book incident. Were you just trying to copy that? Oh, I didn't even think about that. Bulls fucking shit. And your brother's like

nah, nah, that. I get out of my lane. This is my thing. I don't agree with anything that you said. By the way, Noah, his brother? apparently like a fan favorite. Yeah. So apparently... He's like a good dude. Yeah, he's the good twin.

Yep. You're the evil twin. Yeah, but like I understand Aaron talking about the obvious, the usual suspects of they shouldn't be here. But bringing Spencer into it doesn't make any sense. That was wild. Because I rewatch, which by the way, that was not the question. The question was, who were you talking about when you left? Sam M. and...

Or Sam N. Sam N. and Devon. Yeah. And he throws Spencer into their... Got astray. because he watched the show when he got home and realized the way that he was talking about his fiance that broke up with him or that it cheated on him

it showed that he wasn't like emotionally available he wasn't fully over all of that that wasn't the question no question was who were you talking about when you left the house you didn't know that at the time so don't throw Spencer out of the bus now because you don't feel the same way especially considering you're divorced yeah loser just for the record I'm divorced so yeah you over your divorce are

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A nice tan, sorry, nope. But a box fan, happily yes. A day of sunshine? No. A box of fine wines? Yes. Uber Eats can definitely get you that. Get almost, almost anything delivered with Uber Eats. Order now. Alcohol and select markets. Product availability may vary. by Regency app for details. And that, for him, I feel like every single thing that this man does is try to, he's like a relator. Yeah.

I understand how you're feeling I went through a divorce. He got cheated on by his fiance. You know what that's like? And he also shared it. And all of the moments that he was with Jen, he made the absolute most of. We were all fans of Spencer. We also didn't think that it was going to work out because he's a little bit too, you know, nice.

Yeah. But, you know, there's somebody out there. There's a lid for every pot, as my mother-in-law says, Susie Q, shout out. Yep. but leave Spencer alone and everybody the best part

was the reaction from the caucus everybody sitting behind and I'm like whoa Spencer I'm fucking talk about Spencer you see Hakeem

and Ricky both jump in like what the fuck are you talking about he stepped in yeah and then you got fucking punked by your brother who was

I fucking put it all together in this moment by the way one Noah's got like the cool guy look at the you know push back slick back pushback

pushback pushback pushback pushback People can change. Yeah, people can change. He's got a pearl necklace on as well. Loose fitting and also spaced out. There's a couple pearls on there. He's the cool guy.

Aaron wants to be like his brother. That's where the book thing came from. That's where the pearl necklace thing came from. Did you notice the pearl necklace was on again this evening? Did you notice that it was looser than previously? So it's a new pearl necklace. This man purchased a new pearl necklace. And the other thing that I pointed out to Dev,

because she was watching this last night with her mom. and she is not caught up. So she was asking me about the rundowns. I gave her, like, the full breakdown of everybody. In that moment, I realized, Aaron doesn't wear that all the time. We saw scenes without the pearl necklace. That means that this man puts an outfit together. And he goes, you know what would make this better?

Pearls. Tight choker pearls. Yeah, the tight choker pearls, I can't get over. Waring it to accessorize an outfit is fine. I disagree. I don't wear it all the time. It's not a cross. I don't have a...

No, no, no. I'm all for accessorizing. I'm not saying you can't wear certain necklaces with certain outfits. I'm saying the fact that this specific necklace, you looked at this specific choker pearl necklace and went, not with this fit, but definitely with this fit. It doesn't go with any fits. That's my point. It just doesn't work for Arab.

It doesn't work. It could work for someone. Who can wear a pearl choker? Odell Beckham Jr. Good rebuttal. Yeah. Solid rebuttal. Actually, yeah.

Okay. Fine. Cool. that was fuck that's good anyway we get the salmon

and our guy wow he is definitely still in venom mode a little bit you can tell he's still feeling himself

a little bit but at least he was able to say I definitely jumped the gun and I shot my shot he threw a little shade in there he's like I did it a week

before Devin did it yeah he's like all right dude yeah but you saying it versus anybody else saying it is very different because you don't know what love is

you're a love virgin also you said it during a strip tease everybody's like oh yeah let's see the dudes yeah it was uncomfortable you're like i'm gonna bear my soul instead of my ass cheeks yeah nobody wants to see that they want to see them cheeks yeah yeah clap them cheeks bro shout out jonathan shout out jonathan yes yeah show them all comes back to butt cheeks it all comes back to butt cheeks full circle but and also it was because he hurt his wrist wait come why he did it no it's not because he was already undressed he was wearing a robe You don't need wrist to use. If you're not watching YouTube, you don't know what I did.

Yeah, I don't know. I don't know. That's the tie. Thinking back, I don't think any of the guys really used a lot of the moves that they learned from the Thunder Down Under. Did we see a dolphin dive? Not one dolphin dive. We did see a shirt tear. Yeah.

One or two of those. Yeah. But, yeah, we didn't see a lot of dolphin dives. Now. Marcus. They probably all watched Sam hurt his wrist and they're like, oh. No. It couldn't be me. It was during practice.

We got rugby next week. Yeah, we got. That's the other thing. Rist was totally fine for rugby. He went home that week. He played rugby. Oh, he did play rugby? Yeah, that was when he went insane.

Yeah. Was that the next week? Yeah, that was the following week. That was when he went Venom mode. Should have got sent home that week. He was the last rose, remember? And that was definitely a sympathy rose. This guy just told me he loved me in front of thousands of people.

Like, I should probably give him a rose. Yeah. Assuming there was thousands of thunder from down under. It was probably a couple hundred. Probably a couple hundred. Thousands watching. Thousands watching. Millions watching.

Millions watching all over the world. Anywho, we get the Sam M and Devin. And Thomas N, this is when he gets checked because he took offense to Devin stealing time because Austin didn't even have any time. Why are you concerned about Austin's time? Austin's not there. Who are you defending? Doesn't need you to defend him.

You could defend yourself, say, I wanted more time. He always points to other people because he wants to seem like he's a good guy looking out for everybody. And Ricky, our man, Ricky once again, steps in and goes, dude, I love that he said It says, he goes, fucking man up and talk to her. You could have, he was playing the game. He was keeping the main thing, the main thing. And that's what Jeremy says. He defends Devin as well.

And Jeremy should know better than anybody. He spent the most time with him, except for Jonathan. And he says, at least he kept the main thing, the main thing. And that's where that conversation pops up. And we got all of the quips, ten toes down. I love that everybody notices. were able to just spout them out immediately. Just like in congruence.

Everyone says a different line that he said. And Jeremy paints at Berkeley says, this man, or I guess it was John. I think John said it, yeah. Where he's like, he just says words with no meaning. There's no depth. He just says things that sounds cool, but it doesn't mean shit.

Yep. And the best comparison we get is comparing him to Cat, aka Lindsay Lohan from Mean Girls, and claiming that he was so obsessed with that's why he was acting like an asshole because he wanted to kiss him. Yep. That's all he wanted. Yeah. Just wanted a kiss. We already know that Thomas N and Sam M

definitely smooched. They definitely smooched while they were whispering in each other's ears. You can even see it tonight too, and I'm glad that they didn't really focus on it too much. Every time that Sam was put in a weird position, he would turn around and look at Thomas. Yeah. But when Thomas was in a weird position, he was staring bolts at Sam M

and Sam M wasn't turning around to help him. Because Sam M doesn't care about you, Thomas. It's not a reciprocating relationship. shit. He used you. You were his lackey. And you fell for it. And everybody else noticed. Other people noticed it too. That's the best part. It wasn't just us.

But Spencer points out and I'm curious and it'll be interesting to watch like The Bachelor and then next season of The Bachelorette. There seems to be more drama amongst the dudes than normal this season, which you could argue is better TV. Seeing all those idiots

barking at each other. So if you're missing this one, maybe you should dive back in. I don't know. I'm just saying. Good time. Spencer, love Spence. He points it out. He was like, nobody kept the main thing, the main thing for the first month. Everybody was talking shit about everybody else. It was kind of a disaster. And that is what we watched.

And then Sam gets put in the hot seat one on one. Let's talk about Sam's journey. This man learned nothing. Nope. There's no journey. There is no journey. He's still at square one. Everything he said, he said the same thing in the hot seat.

He said the same thing towards the end of his on the show. truthfully, very truthfully. He had his walls built up around him. He didn't know how to break them down. Jen was able to show him his true self before he was able to see it. What the fuck does any of this mean? I don't know. You just added more like very cliche quotes to your repertoire that you hadn't said before. So it sounds like something new. But it's not. You're still saying the same shit. And look, I mean, I'll give him credit for being able to sit through all of the grilling. Not that there was necessary. It was a very light grilling, which there a little bit more. It was just a sizzle. It was a little sizzle and he sat there and took it and I love

that every time somebody from the group of men, the panel, spoke up and said something, he goes, I'm really happy you pointed that out. Yeah, every time. Are you? You would have brought it up yourself if you were happy that they pointed it out. You're not happy they pointed it out. The ring doesn't work. I know. It's so funny though. They bring it up and he goes, oh yeah. Actually, it's almost like he took media training before this. Thank you for bringing that to my attention once again, because truth I felt like I've learned from that and I can use that in truthfully further relationships down the road

truthfully. We get it. We're telling the truth, allegedly. But we get to the dull energy thing and I love that everyone's kind of reading through his bullshit except for John. John's like, it's nice. It's true. You know, you're up here with like some humility and this and that. And look, for all intents

and purposes, it wasn't the worst he could have performed. No, he could have been so much worse. I wish it was worse. I do too. He did fine. He did fine. but I love that they start nitpicking a whole bit like you it's shocking to me that you would at the end of everything you say that you love this girl nobody believes him thank God everyone thought that was a Hail Mary which it clearly was and then we get to the dull energy comment and he takes like this is my favorite part about Sam M when he tries to make things better he always makes them worse yeah he's like no her eyes were dull it's like oof bro

What are you doing? Every time that I saw her before then, she had this spark in her eyes. She walked in that time, I could tell there was a difference, and her eyes were dull. And that's what I was talking about later. It's like, no, you weren't. You wouldn't. You would have said her eyes were dull, if that's what you meant. And that's still not a compliment.

It's still not nice at all. No, you're still, all you need to say there is like, I was super emotional, I just got dumped. I actually was in love with this woman. I was hurt. I lashed out. I'm embarrassed. I'm sorry. period he didn't apologize once he said i'm taking accountability you're not and he said i'm learning

and i'm going to be better in the future and of course all these idiot dudes are like nice bro good for you it's like guys come on you're making dudes look bad you're falling for this shit insane yeah this guy's clearly full of shit and don't worry he gets his come up and very shortly but he just apologizes for his delivery everything is the delivery i should have said things better blah blah blah fuck you sam m i the fact that dad wasn't there or we didn't see that i know that's a bummer or like bring it up hashtag and there's signs too he could have had a sign up because we joked about that yesterday have the sign hashtag justice for what was it fucking hell how do you forget already hold on you've remembered it yesterday hold on hold on we haven't talked about it for weeks

hashtag how do you remember this was just yesterday i'm Stand for Sam M. Christ. Yeah, stand with Sam M. Fuck. God. Why are you mad at me? Because that's frustrating.

I was so proud of you yesterday. I was, too. And you ripped it away from me. It's fleeting. My brain is a conundrum. Okay? It is not to be trifled with. Yeah.

I don't know what I'll remember tomorrow. It's always fun to find out. Like, oh, yeah. I feel like when I remember things, I forget other things. Yeah. So I must have remembered something today. There's only so much storage in there. Yeah.

Not a lot left. A lot of it's gone. I drag a lot of it away. I'm running on like two gigs of brain. That's a lot. Is it? I don't think so. I think brains like terabytes.

I even said gigs. I know words. No, I meant like gigs is a lot, I would assume. Two gigs is not. I'm pretty sure your brain functions on like terabytes. I don't think your brain functions on bytes. It doesn't function on it, but it has the equivalent of the memory storage of like, this is true.

it's shocking the amount of storage capacity when you compare it to terabytes, gigabytes and all that, this is real. Fuck do you measure that? Look it up. Just as far as memory goes, because your brain is so complex, it is vastly, vastly larger

memory-wise and memory storage space than any kind of computer chip. How about that? Yeah, say, that's the shit. That's the stuff I can remember. And then you've got your external hard drive here on your notebook. I thought you were pointing at something else. I was like, what are you doing?

on your dick, on your pecker. You pointed up my left. I was like, what do you fuck off, bro? Creep. Poor of a USB port, you know what I mean? A little flash drive. Jesus Christ. Anywho, Jonathan has his sit down.

There's not a whole lot to talk about. You know, he just, he kind of shares what he shared with Jen. Like, yeah, great journey. He really cared about her. Wish I'd figured things out sooner. Learned a lot. Wish her the best, this and that. we get the first official bachelor in paradise invite i was ready for it yeah good invite surprised

um i thought he was going to get it so kadoos to you jonathan where we'll see you again bachelor in paradise by the way it's gonna be fun i've watched that it is so fun because it is so not serious even on the show like it's just it's more people will jump from person to person because there's multiple bachelorets there's multiple bachelors they interact with one another they will, like, kick rocks to this one and go to another one. People get kicked off. Oh. When they get kicked off, new person comes in.

Oh, Love Island. Yeah. It's a similar setup, not as in depth, obviously, and not as psychologically scarring as Love Island. Yep. My favorite part of the aftermath of Love Island as I dove into it more and more is the amount of contestants that went on social media and said, I need a breather. I'm taking time away from social media, like, five or six of them are like, blackout dates. Runs rampant for that. It's pretty nuts.

But, yeah, I think you're going to thoroughly enjoy Bachelor in Paradise, so I'm excited to dive into that in the summer. But Grant comes on out, to no surprise, big influx of applications once he was named the Bachelor. Yeah. Look, he's gotten all. Good looking dude. Seems emotionally intelligent. I love how long it took him to just get through the first question.

So how's your life changed since becoming The Bachelor? Is everybody excited for you? My mom, my mom's really excited. excited. My dad, super excited. My sister, also very excited. I'm like, dude, like, we get it. Just say my family's excited for me. No, I like the breakdown. I think it's funny to be redundant sometimes. But Hakeem stoked. Hakeem is all fired up for him. I guess that's what I am confused about. I guess a lot of these dudes are still friends. Yeah, probably. Like chatting about it. Hakeem said that he's like a major influence in my life. He's my

mentor like a look up to this guy he's a man of god so i'm a man of god now to it and like he i wonder if grant feels the same way though i'm curious looks annoying akim looks like he's that friend he looks like the guy that he's so nice yeah you know like the nicest do in the world comes on too strong yeah you know that's my best friend it's like yeah we met last week my guy that kind of that kind of oh yeah i know him so well we met last night yeah exactly oh he's my best friend's like yeah bro settle down you're gonna scare him away so yeah i want to see if Grant feels the same way, but hey, good for him. Yeah, I like that he came with that energy.

Oh, me too. Just because he's, he got the happy to be here. Ricky had the agenda. Ricky had a job to do. Ricky had a job to do. I'm going to just try to show out. Maybe I'll catch an invite. Maybe not tonight, but in the future if I do well.

Hakeem was like, I'm just really excited to be here, guys. And he ended up getting an invite for it. He did end up getting an invite. I love that too, but Jen comes out. And Sam N, they didn't have to zoom in on. him. His smile was terrifying. Yeah. Like unsettling. Yeah, very

creepy. Yeah, ear to ear. I don't think that he's trimmed. You know, if you're going to be on TV, man. It doesn't help the Jesse Palmer's sitting up there saying, yeah, it's your first love and your first ex-girlfriend. But um, tch. Yeah.

You're right. I'm really stoked to have her as my first ex-girlfriend. It's like, don't double down. Yeah, creepy. Weird. Very creepy. Not fun. Nope, not at all. Seeing X the first time. But he was relatively mellow. I don't, this is so funny. This should just paint the picture of what his journey was on this show. She says to him, you know, being able to help you through this journey of emotional growth.

Like, yeah, you held this man's hand and taught him how to feel feelings on a show that's supposed to end with him proposing to you. That don't, Bachelor Nation, don't invite men like this on the show. No. It's not, like, it was a funny episode, but that's scary. Yeah, it's definitely a little horrifying, and he's, I guarantee you he's on her Instagram, like, every day. Oh, yeah, for sure. Probably showing people. He probably has on his Instagram, Bachelorette contestant, first love, Jen, first love, always, something like that, hashtag Jen forever.

I'm not even going to look it up. I don't need to. Yeah, that's what it says, for sure. But we get to Thomas N, and that's where she drops on him. Had you paid attention to me, perhaps it would have turned out differently. gives the most blaze like ho-hum like i know i should have done that and just if i could do it all over again i'm just a fucking weasel with a bad beard and i don't know my boyfriend sam m dumped me too so i lost two two girlfriends and boyfriends when i was on this show and yeah i'm thomas

that's my that was pretty good i think i nailed it that's yeah i think you said more than what he said he's just an idiot yeah he's just he's very not self-aware just looked so uncomfortable up there he looked like he was going to cry i thought he's going to cry a couple of times yeah a couple different times. Honestly, the first time I thought he was going to cry was when they were showing that Devin got selected to be a finalist. I could have sworn he was going to cry. And he tried to make this smug, like, look at this guy face. But it just looked like he was about to well up and start crying. The best was when Devin was going through it on the camera. Yeah. And they cut the same end. He smirked. I was like, he's still there, buddy. And also,

he is in such good standing. He's about to take himself out of the game because she doesn't feel the same way about him. But he could go to the finals. Even without the love conversation, Devin was going to the finals. Now he's just going with, like, solid armor where he's like, fuck, I'm good to go. I'm probably going to win this shit because he had the balls once again, and this was my favorite part, and I wrote this down, by going to talk to her one-on-one, that is the most Devin move of all time. He stole more one-on-one time. He's been doing that since day one. That's a really good point.

So Thomas N., instead of being a smug little bitch that lost, take some fucking. notes this guy's played the game even in the last round he steals more time yep fucking great so fuck you thomas n but then we get to sam m once again her demeanor regarding sam m could not be more night and day now they ask or jesse palmer asks you know did red flags alarm bells she goes whoof lots of red flags lots of alarm bells i realized we didn't have any conversations like he didn't know me at all. And it's like, thank you. That's what we were yelling for the entire season. You haven't talked yet. You just want to bang them. Run. So for her to have this epiphany, this sampiphany, if you will, and then she won't fucking, no, you can. She doubles

down and goes, I'm going to speak to you in words you're going to understand. I'm going to keep the main thing, the main thing. And I was like, oh, she's about to torch this motherfucker. And she did. Yeah, she ripped him apart. Rightfully so, too, because that's something we've all been waiting for. I'm happy that he just sat there and took it. That's what he needed to do. He did try to explain a little here and there with no apology ever.

But for the most part, I feel like Jen needed this. Yeah. We needed this. Everybody needed to see this. I love the guy's reactions too, because that's, again, with a little panel on the bottom of the screen, starts popping off. You get to see everybody's just like, oh, yeah. I think Jeremy did like, oh, ooh. Yeah, that was really entertaining.

It was, and she pointed everything out that we were watching. And again, when you're caught up in it, especially when you want to boink, maybe you look over some things. You don't see it. But she called out everything, and she's like the most upsetting thing that I saw. They broke the fourth wall. I'm like, fuck yes. I love a good fourth wall break. And she was like, after watching your behavior on this show, you get kicked off, and you have the balls to take zero accountability.

You want to get up here and talk about accountability, talk about, taking ownership of what you did, you didn't at all. You got your family to go on social media and lobby for you and blame producers, blame the edit, instead of just looking inward and actually changing. And I hope that you're able to change or else I feel so bad and so sorry for whoever you end up with. I was like, fuck. Rip them apart and then hit them at the very end with a, I do wish the best for you. Nothing worse than that, little patronizing.

Well, bless your heart. Oh, yeah, bless your heart. Unless your heart. That was so good. Yeah, that was very entertaining. And his response? I truthfully appreciate you saying. I'm truthfully.

Yeah, because I want to work on myself. And truthfully, thanks, bro. At least I don't think that his voice changed at all this time, which is good. You didn't have an accent this time. He didn't have an accent. How about that? How about that? Yeah.

Shocking. But that's about it other than we get some wacky bloopers. And I didn't even grow like a wacky fan. Aesima. Oh, look at that. Yeah, like wacky bloopers. Oh, good for you. A little artist.

Yeah, I like to doodle while I watch sometimes. But the bloopers were funny. I didn't think they were necessary, but they were funny. And it's also funny once again. And we know this from Housewives and Bravo. They reshoot certain scenes, like set up scenes and stuff like that. They'll do a few times, like the walk-in. They'll shoot that four or five times to make sure they got the right one.

So it was funny to see her trying to set up the scene like Thunder from Down Under and fuck it up. So I like a good fourth wall break once again. But the last thing we need to discuss, and I feel like he earned it. And I don't know. Well, I didn't know what was going to happen either because Jesse started off by saying,

if by some off chance you get invited to Bachelor's in Paradise. There's bugs. And I'm like, off chance is so mean. It's so mean. And I also thought that it was mean. It's almost like, oh, you want to be on the show? Yeah, we're going to put bugs on you. Yeah.

Now you can be on the show. No, it's like, all right, cool. I thought that they were just doing it for the audience. Like, all right, we're going to throw this fucking huge spider on him, and it's just going to be really funny for us to all laugh at him. But they at least reward him. They did reward him. And that's what I was saying.

I'm curious if he was a pick already, or if they were planning the tarantula thing and then his performance throughout the night. It's like, oh, this guy's kind of charming. Yeah, that's a good point. Let's get him on there. Bring out the spider. I didn't think that you shouldn't have to dance for him, though. No, definitely not.

You know what I mean? That's what I kind of bugged me where it's like, Oh, are you going to do it? Okay, now you can be on the show. It's like, if you want them, just tell them to be on the show and say, but you got to put a spider on you. Yeah. Don't dangle it.

Don't dangle it. Don't dangle it. No. But all in all, loved it. I loved it. I loved this episode. That was very entertaining. I'm happy that we got the back-to-back-to-back, too.

Any questions? Uh, well, we've got one week to go, and it's on Tuesday night. Yep. And three hours of back-to-backer. That is going to be interesting. Let's do our predictions now. What do you think is going to happen? Well, I mean, Devin, I believe, is the winner.

I think so, too. We get that weird. I'm not going to let you propose to me seeing. I keep thinking about that, and Marcus is taller than Devin. I was doing the same thing, and Marcus is not taller than Devin. No? No, Devin's tall. I was actually surprised when him, Jonathan, and Marcus were standing there,

and then I'd put things together to try to figure out how tall people are for that reason. Because later, when they're bopping around the vineyard with Jonathan, And she goes, where's my medium king? So Jonathan's probably like 5-8, 5-9. Okay. He's about the same height as Marcus, which puts Devin about 6-1, potentially. All right.

Somewhere in that range. That would be mean, though. I don't know. Maybe I'm reading too far into that. No, no, I did the same. I was trying to see where eyes were looking. Maybe that's what she did, do they say that? Is that like the vernacular that they always use?

I'm not going to let you propose to me? No. I can't let you propose to me? No, there's some people that'll say, like, I think, I think they'll be like, I can't let you propose to me. Yes, I think that's happened before. I don't, wait, maybe not. Maybe it's, I do know there's been denials of proposals.

Like, will you marry me? No, I can't. Yeah. But the upfront, I can't let you propose to me. I think. But to say that to Devin is like, oh. So that's why I just think that. That doesn't make sense to me.

To Marcus, it makes sense. It's a smokescreen. It could be. Maybe it was AI and that never happened. But the way that fucking Palmer's talking, he's like, this is the most groundbreaking finale we've ever had, which I know it's hyperbole, probably, but at the same time, what is going to happen that has not happened in the other 60,000 seasons of this show? Tune in next week.

Well, predictions, predictions, prediction. Devin, I got taken it home. Yeah. That makes the most sense. As far as what that moment is, let's predict that. I think that Marcus goes into it the intention to propose, or Devin walks up first. Yeah. And she says, I can't let you propose to me until I talk to Marcus.

Maybe it's that. Or I can't let you propose to me because I'm going to propose to you. Because that's a way to show him that she loves him. Yeah. Because, oh. That's totally not going to happen, but I would love it if it happened. Fuck that. I'm banking on that now.

Or they're going to hit us with the old bait and switch. And they're going to throw, we're going to see Marcus. walking out there, or I'm sorry, we're going to see Devin walking out there, and we're going to get that same camera angle, and it's going to say, I can't let you propose to me. And it's Marcus. And then they pan out, and it's Marcus, not Devin. Or,

it's Sam M. Or it's Jesse Palmer. It could be Jesse Palmer. I would marry Jesse Palmer. Fuck yeah. I want to go. I just want to travel and play golf of them. Yeah. You go do your job, honey. I'm going to stay at the range. That'd be great.

It's outstanding, but tune in next week as we will for the three-hour finale, and we will figure out who the last man's standing is, and then the age-old question, will it last? If Devin gets picked

and it doesn't go the distance and they don't get married for an extended period of time, that would suck. Yeah. Because he genuinely seems in love with her, or he's just a really great fucking actor. And I don't think it's that.

I don't think it's genuine. It seems genuine. I'm rooting for Devin. I'm rooting for Devin. too. Fuck you, Marcus. Bravo's out here. Later. I'm Amy Nicholson, the film critic for the LA Times. And I'm Paul Shear, an actor, writer, and director.

You might know me from the league, Veep, or my non-eligible for Academy Award role in Twisters. We love movies, and we come at them from different perspectives. Yeah, like Amy thinks that, you know, Joe Pesci was miscast in Goodfellas, and I don't. He's too old. Let's not forget that Paul thinks that dude too is overrated. It is. Anyway, despite this, we come together to host Unspooled, a podcast where we talk about good movies, critical hits. Fan favorites, must-season, and case you miss them.

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