Brown Girls Do It Too - Flicking Brown Beans

Episode Date: July 31, 2019

An Asian girl's sex life is often shrouded in secrecy. However Roya, Rubina and Poppy are breaking all taboos in this revealing podcast.This episode is all about masturbation. A lot of girls, let alone Asian girls, are too embarrassed to even admit they masturbate, that is definitely not the case with Poppy, Roya and Rubina. Listen out for Poppy's ‘seven inch’ guest, Victor, Rubina's account of how she thought she'd broken her back when she first orgasmed and Roya's very cute sounding technique of 'duveting'‘Brown Girls Do It Too’ is a no holds barred conversation between three British Asian girls, who all have sex and are unashamed to talk about it. All the ‘ins and outs’, from the messy realities to the mythical fantasies and sexpectations, Poppy, Rubina and Roya talk about their relationships and sex lives in this funny full frontal podcast.These are genuine and thought provoking conversations, between three progressive British Asian girls who have and enjoy sex, conversations that have never been aired before. How do they navigate the complex world of sexual adventures with their cultural backgrounds and familial expectations?

BBC Sounds, music, radio, podcasts. Brown Girls Do It Too. Yeah. From the BBC Asian Network. Hi there, I'm Robina. And I'm Poppy. And I'm Roya. And this is the Brown Girls Do It Too podcast.

So this is a podcast essentially about our sex lives and we get quite detailed about it, even graphic. You might hear the odd bit of swearing here and there. So if that is not your thing and you simply can't listen to brown girls doing it and doing it well then please go back to bbc sounds and download another podcast that won't have a lot of sex or bit of swearing in it you could try something like gardener's question time or maybe even test match special but if you're chill about the subject like we are, then stay exactly where you are,

because today we are talking masturbation. A personal favourite, I think, of all of us. Agreed. Agreed. We're also going to be discussing why late night Hollyoaks was all of our entry-level porn, dirty talk, and that time we all masturbated to Shah Rukh Khan. Our Poppy will not be missing out any details because we're going to hear from one of her special surprise guests called Victor.

Look, whether you have a vulva or not, you need to listen to this podcast because we're brown women and our time is now. We're going to be talking about all things sex in the honest way that only we do. But before we kick off, you're probably thinking, who are these brown sex kittens? I'm Rubina and I'm British, Indian, Asian, all those things. I make videos, but I haven't advanced to making porn yet. Oh, boo hoo. I'm Roya. I'm a Middle Eastern babe, roughly worth 42 camels. And my first kiss happened so that I could skive sport.

And I'm Poppy. I'm Bengali, so that naturally means I like shupari and shutki. And a fantasy I haven't tried is a bit of medium core BDSM. Brown girls do it too. Right, so masturbation. That's today's topic, and the reason we're talking about it is because Roya, you told us both something recently that shocked even us. You said you'd only ever come through wanking.

You never come from penetrative sex and it was just wanking. And it's not even like just penetrative sex. Like I haven't come, like I can touch me and it's like a party and then a man can touch me. It's like, oh, this this is great but like you're not you're you're not getting anywhere like the race you know it's like it's like he's running on the spot sometimes you just need to finish the job and do it well do you know what I mean it's like sometimes you just need to you need to take it to the finish line yeah they're not gonna they're not gonna take it for you but I would argue it's totally psychological for me it's like

I think masturbation is the only time that I can be entirely selfish whereas in sex I'm like oh I'd better spend some time on him or I better be wanking him off whilst I'm touching me oh no I need to be more like you I get into sex and I'm like okay a bit of you bit of me mainly me me me me and then a bit more you is that cool more me and I'm done I once had sex with a guy and I was like, this is exactly what I want you to do. I want you to do doggy style, then missionary,

then I want one leg over, then I want you to take me from behind. I gave him exactly what... He was sweating by the end of it. Poppy, did you have a diagram? Were you like, this is a stage by stage of what I'd like? I have to give them instructions.

Also, I'm lazy. I'm lazy. I'm a lazy lay. So I just tell them what I want and they usually perform perform but it doesn't really work in long-term relationships or if you see them more than once when you first meet them they think obviously you're this like alpha female dominatrix not that I'm necessarily into BDSM but but then second three fourth time around it's like do you think though with with masturbation

Roya question like has other things apart from your hand or touching yourself, has anything else made you calm? Because I have this theory and maybe I'm just like a unique person here, but do you think women have wet dreams? Because I've definitely had sex dreams and woken up and been like, I've been quite damp down there. Do you think that women can have wet dreams? Yeah, I had wet dreams when I was a teenager. Yeah, so it's a thing, right? Why does no one talk about this? I thought I was weird. I definitely had wet dreams when I was a kid, when I was a teenager, but I don't haven't had any.

I try and will myself to have wet dreams, usually involving me and Keanu Reeves, but I don't know. Oh, Keanu Reeves. What about... What's wrong with Keanu Reeves?

I'm not enjoying this conversation. But talking about waking up and wet dreams and stuff so when did you Rabina learn about masturbation or sort of know what to do because it's like there's no manual and particularly like my mum definitely wasn't gonna have that conversation oh no no no one ever told me what to do, where to do it, nothing. It was basically a slow stage of growth of just like rubbing myself against things. And then being like,

this is pretty good. Me too. And getting an image of like Rubina the dog at like rubbing herself against a lamppost or just like a cushion. And being like,

you know what, this feels good but I can't quite get the angles right. What's this going? And then like discovering my hat. And I think it took a long time from know what, this feels good, but I can't quite get the angles right. What's this going? And then like discovering my hat. And I think it took a long time from like the ages of maybe like,

I'd say like 11, 12, body exploration. And then like, I probably came for the first time. I think at maybe like 13, 14. Yeah, I was, but it's funny because I used to call masturbation duveting because I used to use my duvet and rub against my duvet it's like you that's how you learn like you just as a girl when you've got like your vagina you're

just like oh sitting on this chair is doing some work riding a horse suddenly feels great okay I'm gonna tell you girls a little secret that I don't think I've ever told anyone oh my god so basically in primary school so this would have been in year five year six maybe in year four I don't know so in year five year six year four you're like what 10 11 no you're 9 10 11 9 10 11 I um obviously didn't start my period till I was 15 16 so like very much a kid I used to be able to stand in the playground like this with my legs with my legs crossed like this like I am now and I could just like clench my vagina into having orgasms she's a miracle woman imagine if you could just masturbate at work in a meeting I can't do it now and it's like I used to be I used to do it in the toilets in my

in the flat where I was going but I have to like thrust a little bit in the I don't do it now and it's like I used to be I used to do it in the toilets in my in the flat where I was going but I have to like thrust a little bit I don't believe that Poppy is a real human being honestly because last week she told us

I know I did say to you she can only come from penetration I don't believe Poppy is like a real girl where have we got this one from I don't I'm not honestly so I did this

I started doing this at like 8, 9 well not 8 that's a bit too young like maybe 9, 10, 11 and then stopped I don't. I'm not. Honestly, so I did this. I started doing this at like eight, nine. Well, not eight. That's a bit too young. Like maybe nine, ten, eleven. And then stopped. And then, I don't know, maybe like I didn't stop. I couldn't.

I could no longer clench my vagina and cum. And it was a really odd experience because I was like, this is really. I've lost the power. I was like, what is this? This tingling sensation in my vagina that's going down to my toes? But I hadn't quite associated it with sex yet. It was just like a nice feeling that I was doing myself. But it was, you know, for me, it was the showerhead.

Oh, classic. Showerhead. Good water pressure. Good water pressure. You need good water pressure. Well, it was all about the water pressure. If it was the shit water pressure, you were fucked, basically. What you need with a good showerhead is the water pressure if it was a shit water pressure you were fucked what you need with a good shower head is the water pressure that you can adjust so like

a bit of edging and then like yeah go for it actually just go reel it back i know it's like quite painful and you're like oh no no no that's doing damage really i'm all right with that this is why my dad is i'm convinced my dad never got a fucking new shower head because he's like i know what my five daughters are going to be doing with this so i'm going to make sure there's a weak pressure forever anyway what about you roy when was the first time and you had i had similar experience like i think i started really young like i don't i can't remember but i think it was like six or seven where i was like like touching myself and i think it probably came from like watching holly oaks At age six and seven.

Lady Hollyoaks. That is, that is magic. Should we put that in our warning, by the way? Don't watch Hollyoaks when you're six or seven. I know. I really don't understand how I came across it.

But yeah, the thing I found though, was when I was having, when I was masturbating when I was younger, was when I would like reach, I didn't know it was come then, but when I would reach, you know was masturbating when I was younger was when I would like reach, I didn't know it was come then, but when I would reach, you know,

the finale, you know, whoop, that's not my cum noise. To the listeners. I was just going to say, it's quite a flag. It's quite underwhelming

as far as a sound. But I would have this like moment of relation and then I'd feel a crippling amount of shame and like, oh no, I've done something

really dirty and naughty. Is this when you were six or seven or later on like eight and nine up until like I think 15 I would feel really like oh shit I've just done something really bad I specifically remember like a bit like watching telly or something and being like well I kind of need to go right now I really need to go do it because it's such like a natural thing to want to do to your body and I'd be like right who's in the house? Mum and dad, where are they? Okay, great.

I'd never lock on my bedroom door. So I had to be quick. You had to do a quick risk assessment. Who's where? Who's going to walk in? How long do I have? You had five sisters with Poppy. Let me tell you something.

I had those risk assessments on lock. Okay, I knew exactly what was going on. Anyway, what about your risk assessment? What did you have to do? Well, I just basically just had to shut the door and be quick. And I think actually, I wonder if women in general know how to masturbate very quickly because they're like, can't get caught, got to be quick. And it's just got to be quite like a pressured environment.

Like the first time I orgasmed, I remember it so well because I was terrified I'd broken my body. I was like, yeah, I'm really enjoying this kind of like, you know, rubbing thing. This feels good. And then I was like, oh, shit, everything is wet. Have I pissed myself? Have I like ruined something down there? And will I ever be able to go to the toilet? And also I felt like kind of really crazy waves of tingles in my back. And I was like, oh, my God, I've made myself disabled. How have I done that?

How old were you, Rubina, when you first came? I think maybe like 12. Okay. Yeah, really like young and just experimenting and having no guide as to what to do. What about you, Roya? Yeah, I don't remember the first time I came. I'm not going to lie.

I don't know now if... No, I do know that I have. She's never came. I have, I don't remember the first time I came. I'm not going to lie. I don't know now if... No, I do know that I have. She's never come. I have, I have, I have. So maybe. Have you ever come? I have, but like, it's never been like... Like, when you watch a woman coming in porn,

it's like, you know, she's shaking and like... Quivering. And it's always just like oh that was good and it was like have you ever had a multiple orgasm? oh yeah what is this thing you speak of?

you can have had the most orgasms I've ever had from one session of sex is five and a half what do you mean? Poppy explain so i i i can i can explain it to you so you have one full orgasm again i'm not necessarily quivering and shivering and like you know hands to my head thinking oh my god but you have like a full orgasm and then the fit and then the last one is like a oh it just just went over the threshold. But it wasn't quite the explosion that the previous four were.

You can feel it. You can feel it. Yeah. Can you multiple orgasm when you're masturbating? Yes. Oh, yeah. And then it's really crazy because you're just like touching yourself if you use your hand, whatever you use. But you can just keep applying slow pressure for like a long time.

And you can make it last for ages. And then you're like, God, I only had 10 minutes here here now i've been here for an hour the key though babe is quick succession you can't like wank and then read a book and then i mean you could but it takes longer time you see i when you talked about speed rabina i am so anti that like if i'm masturbating i'm i want visuals i want like chat i want loads of things. I want to sit up. Yours sounds like a bloody dinner. I take myself out. I got a date with myself tonight, guys.

And it's like two hours of like, what's the word? Edging. Edging. That's it. Edging. And it's two hours and I'm like, oh, no, I'm going to take my hand away. Oh, no, I'm going to take my hand away. So like, that's where the pleasure is for me. And then the end lasts for about six seconds. Oh, wow. Mine is like completely different. Probably what's your, what's your ratio? I was going to say,

you sound incredibly elaborate from probably the first time that you came. Mine, I've just turned into a woman. I'm like, I ain't got no time. I've got to get to work. I'm already late for work. I need to do that thing. I need to read the email.

I need to do this. I'm already late for work. I need to do that thing. I need to read the email. I need to do this. I'm like, so yesterday, I put in a tactical wank. Put in a tactical wank. My boyfriend was in the living room and I was in the bedroom and I think I came within a minute. What?

I think it was two. I think I came twice. It was bam, bam. Thank you, ma'am. Bosh. So Poppy, last night, let's use last night as an example. When you were having your very quick wank,

almost like too quick. It was too quick. But what were you, how did you get there? Like what were you, take us through the process. So you sat down. And also what triggered it?

Like I really want to know about your moment of arousal to relief. So this is really embarrassing, but I can't, I tried wanking to porn and I can't. I just find it really disgusting and I like things beautifully shot. But usually I just think about people

that I've had sex with previously or fancy and like... Well, like real people. Like real people. Oh. And then I just use my imagination, pretty much. I don't need a name.

Sometimes think about your boyfriend. I never think about my boyfriend whilst I'm wanking because I feel like it's a waste of a wank. I could just have sex with him, so why am I thinking about him? Interesting. I don't know. What about you, Rubina? I like Dublin and lots of things.

As a teenager, I was really obsessed with Daniel Steele novels. Oh, yeah. And they were just so well read and under my pillow and how creepy is that? Today I was like wanting to tell you guys about Daniel Steele and I was like

I wonder which ones I read and I googled it and I was like that one that one that one and I was like oh my god I was like an erotic fiction pervert and also apparently they're doing like

audio porn podcasts now which I just think is like great because imagine if there is someone out there listening to this and wanking. I know. I wouldn't put it past anyone. I hope they don't find this sexual though. Yeah, they probably do. I don't know.

I think it's all right. That's all you, Rubina. Roya, can you talk us through like your date with wanking from like beginning to end? Like what time of the day are you doing it? Is it in the evening? Do you have a special orgasm window where you're like feeling horny? So now what? So when I'm working, it's just I can't fit it in.

And then I sometimes monitor the time. So when I'm working, I'm like, I'm going to make this a 20 minute gig. But at work? No, no. Like at the end of the day but so so another confession oh my god I feel like I give you guys so many confessions but another confession is I can only really get off on like BDSM porn this just uh got way deeper yeah so I can and interestingly in like a weird twist of fate I've started working on a show about porn, on a drama about porn.

And since I've worked on that drama, I have sort of stepped away from porn because I know like what it means to be a porn star and what it means to make porn. So my like only way of coming is using BDSM porn and BDSM chat rooms and stuff. And I now can't do it. Oh, God. Because I feel like this ethical shame because BDSM porn can be quite degrading to women. It subjugates women. It can subjugate men as well.

And I think there is healthy BDSM. I would say some of the stuff that I've watched is not healthy. And so my orgasms psychologically are linked to that type of porn. I think that is you very psychoanalyzing your orgasm. I think for me it's not as mental as it is for you, Roy. I think for me it's a very physical release. And if I'm stressed or if I'm upset or if I've just got loads going on in my life

and a really good session with myself just makes me feel great. And it's a really physical, primal, yeah, thing for me. My mind is in so many different places when I think about it because actually I can get aroused by fucking anything.

Give me an example, Rubina. Like what, like last wank, what was the thought and how are you doing it uh oh god look at us we're talking about wanking and we're all getting like giggly we just need to no holds barred just reveal everything so i i was uh i can't i can't remember the trigger that turned me on you know that whole phrase i'm like i'm working from home that's kind of you know you're just like you're just staying home to masturbate all day right yeah absolutely absolutely so I was like well I'm alone I've got some time and actually that is

probably the thing that I can because I think I could be aroused at any point and I was like I've just got time now's the time uh and so I like I get into bed oh this is such a creepy I like get into bed covers on and I don't take off my pants. Over the pant action. Over the pant action. But how do you find your clit if you're over the pants? So I like to extend the discovery of myself, right?

Because it's nice to be like touching all the bits around it before you touch it. So you're in... No, it's so weird. No, you've got to hear it. No, no, no. You've got to...

I just told them I listen to BDSM porn. I think we've... I think we've like... Okay. Yeah, we're fine. Okay, so Rubina. Okay, so, no. You've got to... I just told them I listen to BDSM porn. I think we've... I think we've like... Okay. Yeah, we're fine. Okay, so Rubina. Okay, so Rubina,

you're tucked up in bed, right? Panties on. Next step. So I start to lower my hand under. I try to do a bit of like, you know, a bit like self-massage everywhere. Like a good touch of my whole body. And I think I like to touch this area quite regularly because yeah it's arousing and it

feels good so I do and a bit of double actions quite nice occasionally so I went I went down and I was uh I think I'm quite into like dirty talk I think dirty talk arouses me and so I was like thinking about times I've been with lots of people and thinking about the kind of things you could say and maybe I was also just having times I've been with lots of people and thinking about the kind of things I could say. And maybe I was also just having a like a dirty talk conversation with myself. Interesting. You go, girl, you can do this. That's more like a prep talk.

You are a strong, confident woman who will be able to come. That's not sex. That's just like you're nailing it at work. You're going to get promoted soon I like it though yeah I mean that is it I was thinking about why are you embarrassed

about that I was thinking about having sex with loads of people like not in like an orgy although I have had that fantasy once yeah yeah yeah absolutely

but I was thinking about having sex with like multiple people and like the kind of dirty things I've had said to me and that I've said and yeah I think

that just really turned me on in that moment but I mean that's not my only thing I think I don't know Poppy what's your what kind of comes to mind when you mess up? I mean I any kind of role playing

of fantasies in my head so like it could be like a really dirty sexy scene in something I've watched or with a particular actor that I really fancy and I sort of just run with it in my head. So basically, inside my brain is like my customised porn channel, if that makes sense.

Oh, yeah. Well shot, of course. Well shot. Nicely lit. Nicely lit with beautiful people. With Keanu Reeves. Keanu Reeves is like during my heyday 15 year old wet dream you know

post Matrix days I have one Bollywood reference that I like to dip into occasionally oh hello Shah Rukh Khan really did it for me

when I was a teenager I was like you are just sex Shah Rukh Khan and also like all of those films when you watch growing up

and you're just like he's always like everyone talks about women who get like in the rain in saris he's always wearing a white shirt and he's always completely wet yeah shara khan something about wet men is it's attractive it's like the darcy thing yeah i feel that one extra talks it's about real life stories it happened to me at that moment in time your life and the issues we all go through I didn't see any black boys that look like me.

Topical stuff that affects us all. The place where we get open and honest. Why are you dating? What? It's just common sense, no? Covering topics like body image, being gay and black, hustle culture, relationships, your health, and much, much more. They just think there's only one of us when there's like thousands of us.

We get past all the taboos so we can get to the heart of the subject. One Extra Talks with Rhys Parkinson. Download and subscribe now at BBC Sounds. Okay guys, more on what gets us going because we'll be talking about what aids we use and hearing from our special guest Victor. The smell of an orgasm, if you know what I mean, and our masturbation do's and don'ts. Brown girls do it too. I don't know about you guys, I'd be interested to get your thoughts. I separate masturbation from sex so much.

Oh, me too. They are literally yin and yang. Yeah. And so therefore, like, I don't, like, I would never watch British porn. Like, I would never watch British porn stars. I would never watch, like, a porn star who looks like me. I would never watch brown or Asian porn. Like I would never watch British porn stars. I would never watch like a porn star who looks like me. I would never watch brown or Asian porn because for me, that's like totally different.

I want to separate that. Whereas like sex, I can be like my body. These are my boobs. This is what I look like. And therefore porn, I want to be this like, like busty blonde.

It's fancy. Yeah. She's totally opposite to me. Like, you know. Yeah, so that's my aid. It's your crutch. It's your lung. Yeah.

It's helped me along through life. So Rubina, any aids that you use in masturbation or is it all just in your head? No, I use, I still like a little erotic novel or a bit of something to read because it stimulates the mind.

I have a big imagination. That is such a Rubina answer. So academic, guys. First I give myself the pep talk, then I read a book. And then I write in there. But I have experiments with porn. I do occasionally dabble with porn. I'm not afraid to say that.

I think it's really important that people talk about, especially women talking about watching porn and finding the right things because so much of porn is really aggressive. And when I first started watching porn, it was just like, oh, this is like five minutes of someone just getting like having a blowjob. I'm really not getting anything out of this and just seeing a woman being like, I don't want to see that. That's really depressing and upsetting. And a bit like what you were saying earlier, there's loads of different categories on porn. And there is one that's like Asian.

And I'm like, I don't want to go on it. And I don't know if it's because I feel creeped out that people are sexualising kind of brown women. Or because I think I might see someone I know. Yeah, we're a limited group of people. Everyone is someone's cousin's twice remaining sound. But what about you Poppy do you dabble in the pornography I wish I

so this is so my aid is not porn but I would love for you both to send me links to porn that you think I would find

titillating and exciting there's some really brilliantly well shot cinematic porn that you should explore please I'm begging you while you're not

using porn so I used to use this thing here right I don. Please, I'm begging you. While you're not using porn. So I used to use this thing here, right? Oh. I don't anymore because I'm a lazy little shit and I can't be bothered to wash.

This is so weird. You're showing us something that you've put inside you. This is really exciting. I have cleaned him. Oh, wow. Him. Why is it a him?

It's always a him. It's not a her. Let's just be fucking real. So good. So it's waterproof. I have washed it, actually. It has's waterproof. I have washed it, actually. It has to be. I have washed it.

I haven't used it in a while. What does the second bit do? I've always intrigued. It's clitoral stimulation, man. It also looks like someone doing a two finger. So here we've got a rampant rabbit. It's called Victor. And he comes with a seven, he's a seven function rabbit, basically.

We've got. Give us functional. Give us, ease us into it how you would do it. God, I'm just like when I did that my vagina just clenched a little bit put Victor to the microphone

oh my god it's like pulsating so it pulsates it does more than a penis I'm going to hand it to you but it pulsates and then if you press this button here

the up button it pulsates quicker oh is it turning? Roy do you have a sex toy? And then it goes the other way. I do, but I don't come from penetration, so there's no real problem. I do have things on top.

Okay, ladies, I'm going to pass it over to you, but dual... Just touch the handle. Don't touch anything else. It's clean, it's clean, it's clean. Dual direction, ripple action, three variable speeds,

rabbit, clit, stim. Oh my God. That feels amazing. I've never ever had a sex toy in my life, and I've always wondered why one has. So I basically... That is insane. That has been...

That entire thing... Is that the highest setting? Well, it's not the entire thing. About this much has been... Oh, see, that's faster. You've got... Click the arrow. Go up, go up, go up.

Oh, no, this is a new setting. So... It's a round sound. It's like, it's really rippling. I don't know if I love it or hate it. Can you, like, hurt yourself with these things? No, if you use the right amount of lube, no. How do you turn it off? I literally can't turn it off.

Oh, yeah, it's a big one. I can shove that in my vagina. I have to use lube there. I lube, no. How do you turn it off? I literally can't turn it off. Oh, yeah, it's a big one. I can shove that in my vagina. I have to use lube there. I like this, though. This is my favourite bit of masturbating, is clitoral stimulation. I think I'm really into that. So I'm into rough, penetrative,

bang, bang, bang, bang. I don't necessarily come from someone going down on me or like clit stimulation. It's like a starter for me. I need to finish it with some thrusting. You see, I wouldn't usually go in. Like if we're using the, like I like to use the metaphor of park.

And I think there's lots of stuff that's nice outside the park. Like you don't always have to go in the park. In fact, the park is an anti-climax. The park is full, it's just a feel. Because you also have to cut your nails if you want to go in the park is an anti-climax the park is full it's just a it's totally a feel because you also have to cut your nails if you want to go in the park

right I need to go in my park all the time wow okay I could do without it's amazing isn't it how every woman's built

completely differently but like all of us still want to come so basically men are screwed because it's like because it's a work twice as hard to figure out what our body is

there's like a 350 page manual for each new girl exactly that's so true but good's hard to figure out what our body is. There's like a 350-page manual for each new girl. Exactly. That's so true. But good communication will figure that all out. But I think when you have it with yourself, you're on a journey of discovery as well. You start off doing quick and feeling a bit embarrassed about it.

And then as you grow into a woman, the older you get, the more you're just like, I'm going to enjoy this. Life is hard. I worked a 10-hour day. I had to get on the tube and everyone was crazy. And like somebody shouted at me at work. And actually this, like one of those few pleasures in life,

I'd say sleeping, eating, masturbating. What else is physical that feels like great? I definitely wank more than I have sex. And I, God, this is sound, this sounds so skanky. It feels like this is like confessional wanking sessions. But I, God, this sounds so skanky. It feels like this is like confessional wanking sessions, but I, God, I was like maybe 10 or 11, 11, I think. And I was staying at my cousin's house and there's like five,

all of us were just like in a bed, like sleeping. Oh my God, I have totally done this. I have totally done this. And I had a wank. I've totally done this. It was like a danger wank. I loved a wang i've totally done this it was like a danger wang i loved a danger wang i love actually so yesterday last night was a danger wang just to see if i could do it before he came into the room what could i ask what would have happened poppy if your boyfriend had came in like i would have been so embarrassed i would have been like i mean it would it would have been fine he knows i'm like top shot the thing is just working i was just would have been fine he knows I wank laptop shut the thing is

just working I was just working the thing is he knows the thing is he knows I wank a lot but it's something quite else because that's

it's something else when he can see the materials I'm using grabbing some household items here so it's like it's the thought of

me wanking is fine but when he can see the visuals and the aids I think it's like brings it slightly slightly closer to home do you know what I mean it's like, the thought of me wanking is fine, but when he can see the visuals and the aids, I think it's like, brings it slightly closer to home. Do you know what I mean? I think, Roya, like it's super personal. And I think having a partner and not having a partner doesn't even matter.

It's not even, it's never about them. And I think, you know, you said it spot on when you said it's like a selfish thing you do for yourself. And that's fine. And that's why you're allowed to be gratified about it and don't feel embarrassed or ashamed of doing it because it's like the horny thing, like

being horny, you know, that's not something I like want to be. Like I sometimes wish I didn't think about sex as much. This whole idea that, okay, how, like Poppy you know that whole thing of like men think about sex this many times. How many times have you thought about sex today? I've thought about sex probably 52 times. I think about sex

all the time. All the time. And it comes as a passing moment in my head and then it leaves I don't necessarily want to act on it but I think about sex when I'm bored I think about sex when I'm stressed I think about sex when I'm tired I think about sex when I'm horny and think about sex when I'm not like I think about sex a lot yeah comparatively to men I have no idea but I think about it and Roya what about you yeah no same and I I think that's the good thing about sort of masturbation fantasies. It's like you can be on the tube enjoying the rocking of the tube a bit and just be like, oh, I might just think about the last time I was having sex. Or like, it's so, because as a girl,

the good thing about being a girl and not being a guy, is when a guy is horny, it's like, whew. And it's like, they get this massive boner and they just look like a creep whereas like when a girl is horny she's just like she's just rocking

I was with a guy Bobby's standing there with her legs crossed literally clenching I'm like oh my god but honestly I was with this guy

and I used to do this thing like a whenever I was like gyrating or rocking with my hips he's like you want to bang, like whenever I was like gyrating or rocking with my hips, he's like, you want to bang, don't you? I was like, oh, yeah. Is that what that is?

Sometimes it has a mind of its own. Because I think it's just the thrusting action. But going back to what Roya was saying about feeling this guilt and shame, I felt it. Sorry, there was a connection to the danger wank. Like I felt so mortified and disgusted. Like I did this thing but like you do it and like no one there's no cool older sister auntie cousin who's like I do it all

the time you're cool you're sort of you're cool you're cool to win the cool club but it's like you know you sort of experience it on your own for ages and then you might get girlfriends or boy mates but more often than not, girls that you share with. I think that's a really interesting topic, actually. Like when you're amongst your girl peers, there's a moment where one of you might slip and just say like, oh, you know, like test the waters. Like, does anyone else do this?

And there's loads of girls when you're very young who are like, no, no, no, I've never done that. I would never know. I don't want to get anything out of it. I didn't do it. It's like, okay. And then also, if you don't don't that's lame that's like bad for you man I'm sorry one of my best friends and like I believe that she's being honest with me does a masturbate she's like tried it not a fan like I prefer sex yeah and and just doesn't touch herself ever and it's like

I don't really understand. What would be a life without that? I really don't even know if life would be worth living. Honestly, I love wanking so much. It's like efficient and I come and it's super easy and I don't have to please anyone else. I can be totally selfish. I can do me and then I can go to work.

Poppy, do you think there are like distinct health benefits to touching yourself to masturbate? Oh, okay. Distinct health benefit one, I sleep better. Oh, yes. A wank before you go to bed is ideal. A wank before you go to bed is ideal. Sometimes I wank to go to bed, to get sleepy.

I've done that. Rubina, what about you? I think masturbating for me has been really important to my mental health. Like I think when I'm stressed or I'm feeling down, I just like I need to find that way to pick myself up quicker and be like, you have to get on with the day. You know, you've just got to get better. And I think it just makes me better instantly. And I know it's like a small, thrilled rush. But I think when I can understand actually the power of my body to be able to do that and the power that I have for myself to control that.

It helps me like connect my brain to my body more as well. I'm like, absolutely. This is, you know, this is natural and this is your body and this is what it does because you spend all day like wandering around and not, you know, not thinking about that. But yeah, for me, it's mental health. What about you, Roy? What's yours? I'm with you. And I think it's like if you have a like stress at home when you're masturbating you

can't think about those things because otherwise it's a massive it's like a like a female version of a you know like losing your erection yeah dead whack because it'd be like why are you thinking about those things so for me it's almost like a form of meditation yeah love that yes that's such a good description because it's like i i'm not gonna lie yoga meditation i know i'm asian but i don't believe in them it's stretching people it's stretching what what is it what is it and it's looking at a candle at least like you know like yoga is the the practice of my people so i'm just gonna yeah let's just ignore that i said i just can't do it because i'm not very bendy and flexible which will play out in my sex life problems as well but um so for me I can't do yoga or meditation to calm down so masturbation has been my form of meditation I think you've hit

the nail on the head it is like a form of matter like it's a form of meditation and it's I think generally that much happier after you've had a yeah and so many women are so unaware of what's happening down there, they couldn't even draw you a diagram. And that, like, depresses the shit out of me. It's like, know your body, know what's going on. And also you have this one function. You're not just a brain. You have all these other cool things going on.

I think one of the urban legends that is going around, which I actually believe in, is that a female orgasm is better than a male orgasm. Hard to know. And it's also hard to know whether orgasms between each other, if we're all feeling the same thing.

Like, is my orgasm better than Poppy's orgasm? Is mine better than Roya's? I think so. I mean, I'd love to ask my mum, not that I would ever ask her, if she's ever masturbated. Oh my gosh, Your mum has. Live with Poppy's mum.

I don't even know what the Bengali word for sex is, let alone masturbation. But I would love to know, like, you know, my mother, how do you pleasure yourself? She'd be like, making a great dinner. I think my mum is a saucy little minx, but I don't know. I don't know. I've got cousins. I mean, all my friends masturbate um but when I was young growing up I was telling my cousin but sort of I know this girl who's masturbated with a shower head would you believe and that was her moment

her in to say oh I also know someone who's had a wank with another shower, but she didn't open up. So I just assumed a bit like when you were recounting that tale of telling your girlfriends when you were 15 and everyone's like, I don't, I think it's awful. What is it? So I haven't really come across many people in my circle who don't wank. But I think if you don't, it's completely okay. Like each to their own right whatever works for you I've got some I've got a couple of friends

who say they don't actually now thinking about it and I've definitely got some friends who say they don't now that they're married or now that they have a partner or kids maybe or kids

but I just don't know why you would stop like I don't know why those things I think you know it makes me a better partner it makes me a better friend it makes me

it just I sound like I'm getting really emotional about masturbating I think, you know, it makes me a better partner. It makes me a better friend. It makes me just... I sound like I'm getting really emotional about masturbating. It's just really changed my life now. But, Romina, like, how... Why would you say that it makes your relationship better? Because I think that sex and intimacy with somebody isn't always about orgasming, and the function of orgasming gives me a lot of pleasure, and I isn't always about orgasming and the function of

orgasming gives me a lot of pleasure and I don't always need that for my partner because I can fulfill that bit by myself yeah and I can get this amazing intimacy and connection with my partner that just is just brilliant and I get so much out of that but it doesn't always need to have this like ending and I think a lot of people are you know think that sex will always end in orgasm and if you're into orgasms, cool, you'll probably do it better yourself. Yeah, I agree. So if you're listening, guys, just have a play down there.

See what happens. Just start off with the... Honestly, it was like this. Do the poppy, which is clench your legs really tightly. Urban myth. I'm going to have to try this. Oh no, you can't do this. I'm not going to try it now. Wow, Rubina, God.

I'm going to try it at home later. She's been doing it the whole time, guys. Honestly, I used to do this when I was nine or ten. So I do hand over pants. But then I'm also like, that kind of can sound gross because it sounds like what I'm doing is I'm just then hanging around in pants

that I've come in, which, know there's there's there's pressures in that yeah dirty I was gonna say that you can just you know wear coming pants is absolutely fine and I always tie my masturbation in the evening I'm not really a morning or daytime person unless I'm working from home um and so there is some I mean basically you just always have to wash your hands like all the time and i use my hands more than i use anything else because i don't have a sex toy so these bad boys have gotten me through some really tough times sometimes if you don't wash them properly the smell lingers a little bit i find oh you have to wash them and also what about

are you roy are you two hands or one hand can we all just pause because our producer looks like he's gonna have a meltdown because I don't think he realises that the vagina has a smell. I'm going to just tell you something right now. The JJ is a stinky beast. It's a stinky beast, okay?

If you are really foraging up there and you get a little bit of hand wash and you're like, oh yeah, this is a 30 second job. No, spend two minutes. I think just use bleach. It's a bit...

Honestly though, spend two minutes. Honestly. I think just use bleach. It's a bit. Honestly though. It was rank. I remember. I did a morning. I had time and I didn't need to be at work basically. And I was like, sweet. And then it was like a wind.

It was like a wind. I was at the station and I was like, oh, that is me. And then I did that gross thing that you do. I bet you millions of women listen to that be like I've had that before because every woman has you're like it smells kind of like vagina yeah oh it's like it's my vagina it's like you do with this but sometimes you can just and then you're like I won't eat with this hand for the next hour it's okay okay. Well, even if you're just aroused, I've had it before, like, when I'm just aroused

and I'm like, I can definitely smell myself. I mean, also, just because, like, nobody ever tells you, but the vagina is also a leaky beast. So leaky. And there's loads of stuff that comes out there all the time, all day, and she's always fucking coming out. I know, it's so annoying. I'm just saying, like, for goodness sake.

Can't you just keep it in? We had a meeting with someone important. Yeah, yeah, like know it's so annoying I'm just saying like for goodness sake can't I just keep it in we had a meeting with someone important yeah yeah like it's definitely I wonder if people can smell you though or if you're attuned

to your own smell you're definitely attuned to your own smell I've never smelt somebody else's vagina no no no you don't smell somebody else's vagina

I have smelt other girls I've smelt I've got a whiff of period oh yeah period's got like a big yeah it's like and do you find that actually...

Roya, I'm going to ask you this. When you're on your period, do you feel like you masturbate more or less? Oh, more. Like, I am a randy bitch on my period. Like... And it's so... It's like God hates women.

Because it's like, why would you do that when, like, it's a no-go area? It's like... I mean, not for me. It doesn't have to be no go you have so much to come for you you two are savage and then poppy's rigorously washing her hand i've learned my lesson i have to wash my hands

properly what i've learned from this podcast is i'm buying Robina a sex toy and I'm buying you hand sanitiser, Poppy. Those are my two gifts to you. I bestow. Alcohol gel, alcohol gel. Always carry a bit of alcohol gel. Oh, I have one more question I wanted to ask you, Poppy. One hand or two? Usually the left one.

Okay. Oh, lefty. Yeah, yeah, lefty, lefty. Robina, what is the other hand doing? Oh, it's applying pressure. Like different... You never tried that? Like a kind of...

You can kind of apply pressure to the top whilst pleasuring yourself with one hand. And it's really good. Like, yeah. You should try it. Basically, you should experiment. It's your body. You find the things that you like.

You got two hands? Do you know what? Interestingly, I'm left-handed, but I masturbate with my right hand. Is that out of respect or something? Not to the hand that I write with. Isn't that the hand that you, like, you know, shake people's hands? Salam, yeah. When you accept food, you have to, like, accept with your right hand.

I mean, that's like your wanking hand. This is my wanking hand. Serve some right. Oh, your left. Mine's right. I do way more with this. I mean, look at the wrist action on this. This is my wanking hand. Serve some right. Oh, you're left. Mine's right. I do way more with this. I mean, look at the wrist action on this.

This is just dead. It's fucking useless. So mean. So Rubina, what do you do once you've come? I like to take a little moment just to enjoy the moment. I do a little like,

ah. Yeah, that's key. That's really good. Yeah. And then I get on with the rest of my day because I've got shit to be doing

yeah what about you Poppy? I have the same moment as you and then I just check my WhatsApp check my emails

it's like life continues go on the gram see what's going on if I'm late for work and then I'm like gotta go but you know but generally

it's sort of the mundaneness of life after the moment of what about you Roya what do you do I like to take a nap if I can this is why you need

to allocate time your thing sounds like a whole afternoon like bookend some time out Jesus yeah it is and on that note I'm late for one

so I've got an appointment with me in about ten minutes ten minutes mate where do you live you're going to the toilet shit

okay that reminds me have any of you done a wank at work by the way never no have you

I yeah well I tried the clenching thing about five years ago and I didn't quite it wasn't quite working I have really wanted to at points. But like, never.

When it's stressful. Or a lot of my boymates wank at work. They go to the toilet and they're on YouTube and they're on the whatever, Pornhub or whatever. Wow, in the toilet at work. On that note, you guys have been listening to the Brown Girls Do It Too podcast. Join us next week where we're going to do

Sexpectations. That's everything that you're expected to do during sex. But might not do. But might do. Okay, before we out, maybe we should say goodbye to our special guest

of the episode, Victor. Say goodbye, Victor. Bye, Victor. I find it really creepy. I don't like it. Bye, Victor. Bye, Victor. I find it really creepy. I don't like it. Bye, Victor. Over and out. Bye, Victor.

Bye. Brown girls do it too. You can listen to incredible audiobooks on BBC Sounds. Queenie, the debut novel by Candice Carty-Williams, a brutally frank story of a young woman's journey into independence. Maybe we should go to the spooking area, I suggested. Get some air? Or we could go back to mine, he shrugged. I feigned illness and got the bus home. And to celebrate its 40th anniversary, David Attenborough revisits life on earth. Their descendants became the ancestors of all backbone animals alive today.

Just two of the audiobooks you can listen to for free on the BBC Sounds app.