Brown Girls Do It Too - Millennials Vs Gen Z

Episode Date: February 23, 2024

It's the ultimate battle of Millennials vs Gen Z - who will come out victorious? Poppy and Rubina are joined by viral content creators (and Gen-Zers!) Kajal and Karishma who have built very successful careers online and getting into whether they're having less fun, oversharing more, being their own boss and answering what an SMCC is!Have a message for Poppy and Rubina? If you’re over 16, you can message the BGDIT team via WhatsApp for free on 07968100822. Or email us at [e-mail] you're in the UK, for more BBC podcasts listen on BBC Sounds: bbc.in/3UjecF5

BBC Sounds, music, radio, podcasts. Hey, bougie besties. This download is going to hit you a bit different. Yeah, we got mad riz. And far from being basic, we must tell you... Sorry. Oh my God, Poppy. We must tell you this podcast is worth swearing in adult content.

It's giving... A BBC warning. This podcast slaps. Slay. Queen. She's giving main character energy. We vibing. Okay, stop. You sound Gen X.

Shh. We all know I'm a secret boomer. This is a podcast about sex. At least it started off like that. Now we talk about everything. podcast about sex. At least it started off like that. Now we talk about everything. Everything is sex. And sex is everything. And that includes our mistakes, our heartbreaks, and our hot, hot, hot takes. Feeling hot, hot, hot.

Hot, hot, hot. I'm Rubina and the most Gen Zed. Gotta say Zed rather than Z, right? I'm Robina and the most Gen Zed Gotta say Zed rather than Z right I'm Robina and the most Gen Zed thing I do Is have multiple side hustles And secretly think the best job in the world Is to be a content creator I'm Poppy and the most Gen Zed thing I do Is to burn shit down

Well I'd like to burn more shit down Metaphorically speaking But I don't think I do I have some things I care about, some causes. Yeah, I was politically active growing up, like when I was in my early 20s. I think I'm more politically active now. I did a lot more like quite radical shit. Like one time when Guantanamo Bay was a thing, I wore an orange jumpsuit,

which still could be a thing actually, by the way, guys, I'm sure people are still holding political prisoners in a really un awful way who are still wearing orange jumpsuits and I wore an orange

boiler suit in the middle of a square in Edinburgh and lay down on the floor in protest for something in Tanimo Bay

wow look at you and that for me that's like that's a radical act yeah but I could burn more stuff down because i love that energy about gen z man are they just like fuck this and fuck this so um how au fait are you with gen z culture i mean you could sound like you're reading that question a bit more

okay so listen i went on to buzzfeed because remember buzzfeed was a thing this is my favorite thing about copyright you have a conversation with her i should be like it's okay because I read it on Urban Dictionary. Like it's a legit thing because I Googled it and it exists. Which by the way, I think is quite Gen Z of you because I'm from a much more millennial mindset when it comes to research and saying things.

I'll be like, I read this in a book or somebody told me this. I should go to Urban Dictionary. You're more like, I read it on Wikipedia in Urban Dictionary. I read this on Kim Kardashian's Instagram post. No, I don't even follow Kim Kardashian.

That is not factually accurate but yes I would go into urban dictionary and I'm like it is written therefore it is done it is done

it means it's urban dictionary I'm happy to know you love a listicle I love lists I found a list that was like 20 ways to do this

this and this and you'll be like should I tell you what they are and then you just list them I'm obsessed with lists yeah you love a list I love a list

okay so I found this Buzzfeed list kind of questionnaire of how Gen Z you are so I'm obsessed with this yeah you love it I love it okay so I found this Buzzfeed list kind of questionnaire of how Gen Z you are so I'm going to I'm going to ask you this so you're going to have a few questions

okay when you hear the name Jojo who do you think of Jojo Sewer or Jojo Jojo get off me right now

it's the end of you and me oh god I forgot it but yes too late can't wait for you you don't literally know the words I don't know But yes, I have a song. Too late. Can't wait for you. Do you get it? You don't literally know the words.

No, I don't know the words, but I know the song. Do you remember writing on VHS tapes with a sharpie? Yes, totally. Crossing out Toy Story and writing Dawson's Creek. That was how I grew up.

Toy Story 2. Ally McBeal. I loved Ally McBeal. Maybe Ally McBeal was later. Ally McBeal was definitely late 90s. What do you think of when you hear the words TikTok? The Keisha song.

Or TikTok, the app. Oh, I mean, I do. Don't stop. And a dat. And a blow your man's up. When I hear the words TikTok, I think of a clock. Wow. That's so old school.

That's because I'm teaching my child English. And that's how I tell him. That's like a sliver of boomer coming in you. That's okay. You're allowed. Yeah, it's true. Did you ever rank your top eight on MySpace? Yes, 100%.

Okay, I never did that. My MySpace was really sweet, though. I didn't know what MySpace was until much later. I didn't have a computer. I was really poor. Anyway, when you think of Ice Cube's acting, which movie comes to mind? Friday or Are We There Yet?

Friday, but I also think of his music, right? I also think of his music. That question's been written by Jen Zetter. Friday or Are We There Yet? Friday. But I also think of his music, right? I also think of his music. I think that's a bad... That question's been written by Jen Zetter. Did you grow up watching Hannah Montana or The Suite Life or Zack and Cody? Neither because I'm not white. Which jeans do you prefer?

Loose or skinny? Loose. Although I wore skinny. We wore skinny. We wore skinny. Skinny that wear out the crotch because they're so skinny. Yes, yes, yeah.

I was actually thinking the other day because I put these jeans in the um tumble dryer this morning to get them all like shut you know sometimes you put jeans in the tumble dryer it's the only time i use a tumble dryer by the way terrible for the environment but put them in the tumble dryer for just like 10 minutes to get them all starchy then i put them on and you know they're just so tight in the crotch area and then i was walking around the house and i was like is it wrong that i'm being slowly aroused by my own jeans. You're so weird. It's been wrong though. No, I don't think it's wrong.

We have a sex podcast. You could be aroused by anything. That's what I'm saying. Like skinny jeans are probably better for that then maybe. I just found skinny jeans wearing a nappy around my vagina. It was like my vagina couldn't breathe.

But also better for dry humping. Is that really bad for you? Better for dry humping? Yeah. Less fabric and material. Yeah. Next question. Was your first cell phone, this is obviously written by an American, was your first cell phone a flip phone? No. Next question. Was your first cell phone,

this is obviously written by an American, was your first cell phone a flip phone? No, Nokia F821. Here, it's written by an American. Absolutely. I love this question. When you hear the word Millie, what do you think of Millie Bobby Brown

or a Millie by Lil Wayne? A Millie, a Millie, a Millie, a Millie. Obviously. That's a good question. Okay, last one. Did you memorize your friends' phone numbers so you could do three-way calls on your landline? I wasn't allowed.

0208-3001-3003. That's why best friends growing up, house telephone. And we can use it now because she's moved. So you can use it. Maybe I can tell everyone that that's okay. I wasn't allowed. Also, my parents. I know shit was that my parents' landline.

They'll have to cut that. So basically, we are very much um we're very much millennials i'm okay with that though i don't mind being i don't mind and you know i embrace gen z culture they bring a lot of stuff to the game and a lot of the way that they dress is me when i was 10 like they wear all these like kind of early 90s stuff and i'm like well that's cool i have all that stuff and i don't mind that stuff you know and most of their kind of politics feel really right on. They're really like good about the environment.

They're not having as much fun seemingly than we did. Less alcohol, less sex, less actually seeing people in real life and just like, you know, DMing them on Instagram and thinking that you're friends. You often accuse me of being a boomer. And I think you're more, I think you're, even though we're both millennials, I think you're more, you veer towards more Gen Z, Gen Z tropes and I veer towards more boomer tropes.

I think we both have little flashes of both. Yeah, we do. Look at this liver. But I work with much younger sort of APs, researchers, and I really admire their work ethic because they have the balls to leave at six in a way that I never did. And I wonder if that's because they're all really interested

in like self-fulfillment and wellness and they all speak in therapy, because they're like, this is my boundary. This is what I'm going to do for you. But you can only be that if you have money, if you have some sort of privilege. Like I never grew up thinking that I could just like leave work at six because I was like, I feel like I was lucky to be here.

But do you not feel like the Greta Thunbergs, like all these incredible Gen Z figures, they're burning shit down, they don't give a fuck. They're like, look, I can't afford a house. Yeah.

The planet's fucked. Okay. If you were a Gen Z, would you be a Gen Z? Would you act like a Gen Z? Oh my God, yeah. I'd be Millie Bobby Brown. I would be Millie Bobby Brown.

I think I'm a bit like Millie Bobby Brown. No, you're not. You're way cooler than her. Oh my God, no, Millie Bobby Brown is so cool no I find her really cringe really

I find her really try hard oh my god she sees this why would she watch Brown Girls 2 or 2 ever I love her in her I love her in Stranger Things but I think in

I just think who's your Gen Z icon who do you really love obviously Greta Thunberg and this girl called Bird Girl Myra O'Shea Bird Girl she's half Bengali, half white.

And her mission, she's on Instagram, and her mission is to get ethnics, brown people, black people, into the countryside. Oh, yeah, I like that. She's amazing. I love her.

But this is why I love, I mean, I love this generation because they are so fearless. Joining us are a couple of girlies who always get it right. We have content creators who have amassed a huge following online who will now introduce themselves. So you say, I'm, name, and the most Gen Z thing I do is... OK, my name's Karishma, I'm a social media content creator,

and I think the most Gen Z thing I do is build an entire brand of being dancing on TikTok. That's pretty Gen Z on brand. That's the most Gen Z thing I do is build an entire brand of being dancing on TikTok that's pretty that's pretty Gen Z on brand that's the most Gen Z thing you can do yeah yeah yeah you just told us

not to say Gen Z by the way I know how American of you I mean you should say Gen Z too I literally cut that

hi I'm Kajal I'm also a social media content creator I think the most Gen Z thing I do is overshare everything online. That is so Gen Z. In fact, I'm a geriatric millennial, which I love to say.

And every time I'm on Instagram, I have to do it. You know how Beyonce has a Sasha Fierce character? Every time I share something on Instagram, I have to adopt the character of a Gen Z person. Someone who's okay with oversharing. Yeah, who's called Agatha, by the way, which the character of a Gen Z person. Someone who's okay with oversharing. Yeah, who's called Agatha, by the way, which is like so not a Gen Z name. I know,

but I'm obsessed with this name, Agatha. Incidentally, my fake name on field. And I have to pretend to be one of you guys to overshare. I love that you're both

social media content creators. SMCC. Is that like what the kids call it? No, that's what you just called it. SMCC. SMCC.

Hello, I'm your father. Are you SMCC? You're getting your gold star in SMCC SMCC hello I'm your father are you SMCC you're getting your gold stud in SMCC well I'm sorry if you're both saying the same thing you guys need to abbreviate that shit it's a mouthful surely they'll make things easier

hashtag SMCC I didn't know that yeah it's the most millennial thing I would be disgusted to say that I'll say SCCM yeah so this is like

just to clarify this is your job you get paid to do this you don't do anything else this is it this is the money maker I love that listeners what this. You don't do anything else. This is it. This is the moneymaker. I love that. Listeners, what you didn't hear there was them spudding each other.

In total pride of their SMCC players. I love that spud. That was like, that sparked it. Do you guys feel like there's a difference generationally between you over there, both of you are 26, and us over here, both of us in our mid to late 30s? Yeah. The only difference I've noticed is the abbreviation. Really? Do you feel like you need to abbreviate

everything yeah we love an acronym we love an acronym yeah I think I have seen something like that on TikTok where millennials do abbreviate

we love an acronym we love an acronym we love it we love it what do we love I can't think of anything right now but we love an acronym

down to fuck DTF DTF. Yeah. D&M, deep and meaningful. Oh, we always say BTW. Maybe do we say that? I say it all the time. I say it all the time.

BTW all the time. That's really weird. What do you not think of Millenium? I'm 12 years older than both of you and she's a decade older than you. So this is generational. Somehow she's made a decade sound more than 12 years. Somehow in Poppy's world she's about.

I feel an extra decade. She's a decade. I'm 12 years and Somehow, in Poppy's world, she's about an extra decade. I'm 12 years and she's... Who does that? It's my skill as a radio... WTF? I'm not. I'm WTF. Apologies.

WTF. Right. So, 12 and 10. We can all acknowledge that 12 is more than 10. A decade, even though I did make a decade sound way older. That's a real skill. What do you lot think of millennials? And this is another thing we do on the podcast.

We're very honest, safe space. If we think we're twats, idiots, you just say it. Say it. We want to hear it. Say it. I think the main difference, I think for me, when I look at TikToks, I see a massive difference in the way you guys film TikToks. OK. Like, have you ever heard of the millennial pause? What's that? Oh, my God, I'm learning so much.

Back in the day, when you used to have like, when you used to record anything, you'd have to wait a few seconds before it would actually start recording like because of like a I don't know like the technology yeah it wasn't caught up yeah so it's hilarious

everyone now that's a bit older I'm not saying you guys are old no no no it's okay say it say it we don't record straight away we do little pauses

and we're like you just like you press it and then there's a bit of a pause I do that and then you start talking oh my god but with us like I feel like

we're just like yo what are you saying like yes I do that on my Instagramming I'm like so every word

I start with a so it's so bad I actually find it weird when someone sets up a camera like they set up their phone and then they like walk into shot and then they start doing

their little TikTok dance I'm like can't you just cut the top so you can start on the dance I think we're more impatient. That's the thing. Like, you know how we don't have a big enough attention span?

They say that our generation, our attention span is five seconds. And is that something that you're proud of? Because it sounds like you're into it. No, no. As a content creator, I had to study this from like a psychological perspective.

If I want people to watch me, I have five seconds to entertain. So if I took five seconds to start the video ain't nobody watching my video yeah what do you think about those like productivity videos I watch a lot of those like this is my like what's it like five to nine before my nine to five oh I skip them I can't watch that yeah yeah so you don't love that because for me like I'm like how are Gen Z doing this they're like hustle culture is so intense they're all like over productive and I worry about them because I'm like, guys, it's so fun.

Like, do nothing. Just watch TV and like enjoy being young. We do hustle, but at the same time, we know how to edit to make it look like we hustled. So like,

yeah, literally. So you cheat. All I did yesterday was... The hustle edit. It's not the hustle edit. The cheating is the hustle. So like yesterday, all I did,

I swear to God, I was exhausted, was the dishes, yeah? And the reason I was exhausted, I just got off a plane and I didn't sleep for like 25 hours. Like, I was tired. I did to God, I was exhausted, was the dishes. And the reason I was exhausted, I just got off a plane and I didn't sleep for like 25 hours. I was tired. I did the dishes and I was like,

wow, you've been so unproductive today. So then I edited one video. Suddenly people think I'm grinding, I'm working hard. But when you really take my 24 hours, all I did that day was edit one video and catch a flight and do the dishes. People do loads more than me, but I made it look like I hustle. I do hustle, but on that day

I didn't hustle so you can just kind of you can take the like perfect I think a lot of social media is also fake and people have clocked on to that

recently as well we see through it yeah I can see right through it but I love these guys can I adopt you? yeah of course I want to go into some controversial territory here

go on because I feel like you've created this safe space and I feel like we can ask you. If I was, say, an old, grumpy white man here, some of the accusations about Gen Z is that they feel entitled. I think it's the complete opposite.

I think the older generation feel a lot more entitled. Like, we have... Not we. Well, Gen Z have, I feel like like a lot more manners when it comes to like going to restaurants going like treating people that work at in the shop like we treat them with respect 100 and i've seen it happen myself it's always like the older generation that feel like they're entitled they're entitled to something um I've never had a bad experience with someone younger. Like when I used to work in retail,

everyone that made me cry was older. No. Yeah, I know that's shit. I guess part of that accusation comes from the fact that you design your own work schedules, right? Which our generation and before that never had that. That just wasn't a thing. Like actually, we were kind of hybrid. We were like hybrid.

Like we're weird because we were like freelancers and then we got jobs. But like, you know, having a nine-to-five job is to having sick pay holiday pay someone to look after you when you get pregnant to give you maternity leave to like give you a sort of corporate culture that belongs to you guys don't have that you you build your own schedules you're doing your own work your time is yours you get to decide what that is and i think some people look at that and they think like these people don't know what and this is not my words because i think obviously you work hard like they don't know what hard work is because hard work for them for their culture for that generation is like waking up waking up getting on a commute going to a place

having a having a job who might not treat you that well and like going through that corporate culture and having having to like climb up a ladder to get somewhere like as a social media consultant SMCC like where do you go what is up I think yeah that the reason why this is like a topical conversation is because the people posting on social media are people like us that don't have a nine-to-five that wake up when they feel like they need to to get the content they need to to do this kind of thing there's a whole bunch of people doing nine-to-fives our age but they don't they're not on camera so they don't see them so when we we look entitled or we're out here

posting videos for every one of us there's probably 10,000 of us not doing that and doing a 9 to 5 but you don't see those people it's optics isn't it because it just looks like

if you're posting then it just looks like well if you're doing it all Gen Zers are doing it yeah out of all my friends I'm the only one that does it and they all have 9 to 5s

and I've done both I used to have a 9 to 5 as well I only quit I just wanted to like see where it would take me so I've done both. I used to have a nine to five as well. I only quit. I just wanted to like see where it would take me. So I've done all of it. Like I've done the commute. I've woken up at five in the morning to get to work

and there's no light. Come back home, there's no light. Like I've done all of that. So I see why people think like, oh, the job is a lot easier. Sorry to interrupt. Has the risk like paid off? Are you like, like I took this?

Yeah, touch wood. Yeah, good. Good for you. I'll follow do you do you when you girls meet um women in their 30s or late 30s what do you really think of them don't I feel a bit indifferent about it it's not I don't really have an expectation for like women in their 30s to be because it's a thing for us by the way yeah women in our 30s not me personally because I'm pretending to be a Gen Z look at my hat

but women in their 30s definitely feel a thing about women in their 20s what do they feel? well you said you feel you answered the question you said you feel indifferent that's fine

how about you? you feel anything? I like you guys like you guys are so sweet to us what's the problem? They're really nice. I love that thing about, like, authenticity, though,

because I really struggle with that online. Like, I'm not very good at posting online. And also, I think I'm still trying to figure out what my authentic self is. When I was trying to be that girl, so I remember, like, trying to be the aspirational girl because I thought this was the template, OK? Yeah, yeah.

And I really wanted to make it in this industry. I think only in the last year I've become very real like I remember wanting to have like like I wanted to be like perfect because I knew only you want to only follow the perfect girl so let me try and be perfect and then like I would buy avocados they would go off because I never had time to make it so like for real like and ever since I started posting transparency like crying my life struggles I posted a video a couple of weeks ago about getting three parking tickets in a week and I'm crying my eyes out there is a the thing we have to remember is with transparency comes very opinionated people because there's not enough transparency on the internet yes so people think like we think people are oversharing but they're

oversharing what they want to overshare so like the transparency is actually very very rare because like if we do post transparency we get hate for it why are you always crying on the internet why are you crying about your relationship why are you crying about your weight why are you crying about this and this is one of the biggest misunderstandings between boomer x millennial v gen z you've just literally hit the nail on the head I posted something recently ten moments ten photos of 2023

I didn't put any of me there were some serious fucking lows last year but I am not ready I am not where you guys are I would never ever

don't say never ever I haven't posted me crying or being emotional I would never do that I would never do that I just about it's very

I just about cry I think that crying and lots of things because i think i'm the person who posts the least in this little group here because i literally posted uh today on instagram for the first time in a year um just a post a thumbnail whatever you call it i don't know whatever oh god a thumbnail i don't post because i think so much of my life, I have a baby, by the way, and a partner. And I think so much of that is so intimate and personal to me. And I respect their privacy to the end. I don't post about my kid and my kid is the cutest kid ever.

But I don't. I just keep that really part of my life private. But that's okay. Like people, I don't overshare everything about my life where are your boundaries what are the things that you wouldn't share

yeah that's a good question I think that's why boomers and millennials are pissed off with you lot because it's like we see you cry and it's like

and also and also hugely telling about our generations even for me even for us right this idea of our parents our mums our aunties our elders we don't show emotion and that's not not an asian thing white people black

people of a certain age like showing your emotion is like weakness is a weakness it's something even now i'm very confused about who the fuck i am on instagram and i would love to take some advice but i would never ever do do an Insta post of me like crying or being sad. But you'd see me crying about something relatable. You'd never catch me crying over a man on Instagram

or crying over... I've seen some of those posts. You probably have, but I will be selective about what you see me cry over. Crying over a parking ticket is so normal because look at the world

we live in. It's so hard to afford things and now I've got to pay £120 because I was in a bus lane. Like, you're not catching criminals. You're catching people in the bus lane. That is wild. My house got broken into.

My house got broken into by 10 people. They didn't catch one. I go in the bus lane. They caught me in my face. Everything. Yeah, for real. Like, do your job. As a government, do your job.

And I just feel, if I show a certain, like, nobody knows so much about my life and I feel like the person I am today is such a build up of the things that have happened that I'm just not allowed to say because I will go home and my dad will like say, see my generation thinks you guys say everything all the time, every minute of every day.

Does your dad or like do your parents and family follow you on Instagram and do they fully understand what you do as jobs? Mine is like, this i will say and if dad has a problem with it it's okay man i personally feel my biggest fan is my dad my second biggest fan is my mom the rest of my family could i could drop dead tomorrow for the profession i have chosen like they don't care they just want to talk rubbish about me they want to say, what kind of profession is this? But still, nobody knows my story. And I say that and nobody will ever know my story

because I only share this much of what the story really is. If I posted too much, I think I would be at a disadvantage. I'm very private. People don't think that we are. Like people think we share everything. We share our pasta for lunch.

But we are so private. Nobody knows what relationships I was in. Nobody knows so much like let me give you a what's it called hey what's that thing called when

it is the the title and it brings the people's attention in headline clickbait yeah clickbait I was meant to be married

last June people think I'm single for the last 10 years because that's what I post I was meant to be married last June clickbait that's your title thank you oh post. I was meant to be married last June. Clickbait, that's your title.

Thank you. Oh my God, everyone's going to be DMing us. And you get no information. No, I did. You know what? Going back to the parent thing and the family thing. So my parents know what I do. And when I quit my job and I was like,

I'm going to do this, they were like, you're crazy. But okay, we're fully supporting you. My parents love them. Biggest supporters. Like, they literally rave about me to everyone. Anyways, going back to, like, my extended family, one of those little rascals was the reason why my parents found out about my boyfriend in the first place. Like, I actually snitched on anyone.

He or she snitched on you. Yeah, they snitched on me. Because he was my best friend first, and then we slowly, like, progressed into a relationship. And my parents because he was my best friend first and then we slowly like progressed into a relationship and my parents knew he was my friend and then my family member

went up to my parents and was like well you know they're dating like I've seen it on Instagram and then my mum sat me down like are you guys dating and I'm like oh yeah fine

yes yes we are that's so shitty but they had to find out yeah and these people look down on me like for what I do

like my job role what he does like he owns his own clothing brand so like because we're both so we already work for ourselves

at 26 yeah they cannot fathom that at all I think it's jealousy as well yeah like the generation

seeing how you guys like your hustle culture is earning as much earning as much from like makeup which was you know sort of looked down on as a profession. These women, these artists amass so many followers. Like it's this idea of anything,

anytime someone does something that is unfamiliar or is alien, you kind of double down, don't you? Well, I also think like, if I'm being completely honest with you both, I think I was pretty cynical about like social media influences and how they make money and what their life is like, because I just didn't know anyone who was doing it. So I was like, well, how hard can it really be? And what purpose is it really serving? It's fucking hard, man.

You kind of project all these things onto this job that you don't know anything about. I think the most millennial thing I'm going to say on this podcast, and I've said many millennial things on this podcast, is I, watching a couple on TikTok or social media, I have zero interest in. I would... I know, that's such a lie. There's these YouTube couples that were, and they were together, and they, like, broke up, and they'd be like, why we broke up? And I know that's clickbait, but I've watched those videos.

No, I have zero... Maybe it's just me. Like, I'd rather just watch drama. I agree with you, but there are some people who idolise... I know people do it. Like, relationships online, it's a bit... They're like, I want this. Yeah. Yeah. Like, yeah, I's a bit weird. They're like, I want this. Yeah.

Like, yeah, I post like cute videos with my boyfriend. A cute video is different to like, so there are some couples that you follow online and you like,

love the way that their relationship looks. I don't personally. Okay. There's so many fake couples online. Exactly. And this is why I'm like, it's all bullshit.

What fake couples? You've hired fake couples. No, no, no. There's couples online that their whole niche is that their whole like image is

this is us as a couple individually they are also creators but the main engagement that they receive is through their relationship okay

like I would say Kajal you are who you are and your boyfriend has a brand and everybody knows about his brand but you guys are individuals nobody thinks

oh I know your boyfriend's name is someone right sago sago no i knew i knew it started with an s i knew it's something like this yeah but i think of you as separate people i don't think of you as like oh they're joined by the hip right yeah there's certain creators on social media again so controversial i'm about to say uh i don't know any of them personally i will never see them i don't really care So They As long as you don't name them And then they won't get sued For defamation No but I'll tell you after

When the camera's off So basically There's like couples okay And their whole thing Is about posting like cute stuff Nobody's relationship Looks like that Every day he's making you this

Every day he's telling you this Every day You know what I'm talking about You know That's so funny She's like my mind is wearing We know But like

I used to work for a brand Where I had to hire Like these couples To like fake Gift each other stuff For valentines Oh my god So I'm sending you something

Yeah yeah yeah I'm sending you something And you're gonna gift it To your man But you've already Selected it together And now he has to act All shocked yeah

So like I had to message them Saying the reaction Looks really fake Like try again Because I could tell And what they did to me Was say And they were making like on

this video I don't know how many followers they had at the time but they asked me for 4.5k for this post yeah the company was paying them 4.5 grand for this post they asked for 50% up front and nobody does that in the real working world until the deliverables are in your hand you have not paid them in fact until they're posted it's so hot how you're talking to me right now we should be in a fake relationship we should be in a fake relationship could we do an instagram or we're like we're suddenly and then i give you like like a Gucci watch and i'm sure that couple is completely fake they look like they're so in love but i now that they've done that and they're so out there for money i know your whole relationship

is fake because everything you give her is an ad. Accusation number 547. Apparently, your generation don't have as much fun as our generation. Are you both getting laid? You don't have to answer it if you don't want to, but the accusations are flying around. We drink more, we have more fun, we go out, we get more fucked,

but you guys... Yeah, but you're not sleeping around. Like, is sleeping around something that if you're not personally doing, are your mates in your generation doing it? Are your mates doing it? Or is it like a one-man ting, you know? I've been in a relationship for five years.

Okay. Six years. Okay. Six years. So, no, for me, obviously. But my friends, I think, I don't know about you,

but if anyone was, sleeping around, we would be scared that we would be judged for it. Yeah, I just feel like as a social media person, if you're like sleeping around, the word gets out. And when you're on live, when you're doing something like, oh, you slept with this person. Look at the trolls we got when we started doing this bloody podcast. Yeah, it's just not worth the hassle, especially if you're doing something like this. But from your side

of the generational divide that society has created, but right now it feels like we're all in the same room. Like, from where you're sitting, do you feel like your generation is having

less sex than ours? Not at all. Oh, okay. What about... Inconclusive. All right, you want to say something? Go on then, Kavish. I've got two Bollywood actresses here.

I don't know about, like, how much you guys were, like, busy, but... Busy enough, honey. Maybe I'm just, like, an anomaly, bro. No, this is something our generation hears about your generation, actually probably a bit younger than you by three years, that you guys are like smoothies and kale and health and fitness and you don't go out and you don't get like I feel like our generation are very irresponsible like I'm gonna be 40 next year and I literally live my life like

a 25 year old now to this day that's I'm gonna be 40 next year yeah I love this yeah because I recently went on like this holiday and there was like this one crazy night where like we were we booked out this villa and there was like it was snowing but there was a hot tub and everyone's wearing bikinis and minus like minus 10 and like drinking irresponsibly like I believe like I don't know if you guys were out partying every weekend having different partners every weekend that your life's work must have been like movies because we like we pick one person and then we like give them our all every day even but like we don't I don't I don't know like I don't I'm not out there bro nobody you know I've got a theory I'm gonna let you finish Cardinal and I'm gonna say my theory about what you just said I've got a theory I don't know I honestly don't know I honestly see why you would think that because I think our generation

kind of wants to find their partner like they don't want to like sleep around they want to just like find their person get married by 25 have kids by 28 etc etc I every one of my friends i am shocked yeah so here's my theory because we don't share our lives on social media to the extent that you guys do our drama and our messiness is our personal lives going out getting shit face whatever the hot tub whatever like but because you guys share a lot on social media in your private lives in your actual private lives you want it cleaner simple not as messy

not as because your brain and your time is taken up so much by sharing and editing and my next job and deliverables

and this and this and this in a relationship in a friendship you just want a Netflix and chill because you're fucking

exhausted already you want to you want to you want to stay at home you want to watch TV you want to watch a series whereas we don't do that our time we've got free time right so like let's get fucked but as much as i really like i think that's

so uh cool to have like parties every day and like be like drunk and have like a a night you can't even remember like i think that is such a cool way to live i still don't think it must be cool to have like stories for the grandkids like you know this one night I was gone I was in Paris doing this but I still for some reason

just cannot love the idea of running off with a guy I just met for some reason I'm sure it's fun and I'm sure

you had a great time but like I just can't I would never be brave enough to run off you mean like run off

have sex with yeah like I met some guy at a bar and I picked up this guy you were literally describing my day yesterday met a guy at a bar and I picked up this guy. You were literally describing my day yesterday.

Met a guy at a bar, what's so bad? We watched Terminator and then we fucked. And I feel really bad because he literally said, what are you doing? And I was like, I'm going to work. He's like, what do you do? And I stupidly said I do this podcast, which always cock blocks me.

And he's like, am I going to be in it? I was like, no. Now he's in it. Period. You guys would never have a one night stand. You'd never do that. I'm not saying it's not, like the kind of girl who does that is bad.

I just would feel guilty. And what if I get attached to him? What if he was really, really sweet and I get attached and I fall in love because I could fall in love with one day. But he could also fall in love with you at the same point if it was like that. That's his personal opinion.

One second, one second, one second. You said a lot. So when you said, what if you feel guilty, guilty about what? Him falling in love with her. I'm very... Him falling in love with him, potentially. But then he might fall in love with you.

That's what I said. No, no, my problem. Say that again? That's not my problem. I don't understand what you're saying. Because I can't do it for you. Wait, wait, stop. Explain to me what you're saying.

So you did, yesterday, I met a guy, and let's talk about yesterday's guy. The day before, I had another sober day. I didn't fuck him though but I absolutely will sleep with guys on the first date and I have definitely slept with guys on the first date

and I did it sober yesterday was hell on the spot I mean I don't even know if your generation does this but I would like go to a club with friends get wasted start chatting to a guy

and then go home with them like two hours three hours later we're back at someone's house when I was at uni what was I like 19, 20, 21 none of my me and back at someone's house. I'm the complete opposite. Like, when I was at uni, what was I, like, 19, 20, 21, me and my friends would never get with anyone in the club.

Oh, my God, we literally, that's the only time I would ever get kissed. So explain to me, so you would not go on a date with someone or sleep with someone because you felt guilty if you fell in love with them? First, they could rob me. Oh, yeah, but I could rob you, man. This is going back to the anxiety. Oh my God. They took a picture of us and posted it.

Yeah. Oh yeah, that would ruin your career. That one pays a lot of money. But Karishma, that could happen in any part of your life. Robbing could, like we could rob you. Any next man could rob you. Someone taking a photo of you. Anyone could do that.

All of your fears could happen. It's not going to be a guy doing it. This is exactly the kind of conversations I have with one of my sisters. And it is wild to me. I wouldn't want you to not do something out of fear and anxiety. I would want you, I just met you and I feel this weird kinship with the both of you. To try things out out not because of fear anxiety that's crippling you what is this what is this what is this what if this what if like it

just sounds like he i have the same conversation with my sister the the anxiety the have you watched this film final destination yeah like every adrenaline every no every end is death wow wow okay we i think we just give less. I just didn't want you to not try it because you were scared of... But also, like, we are 10 and 12 years older than you. And I would say... A decade! The anxiety I had 10 years ago has completely changed into different anxiety.

Yeah, that's true. And it's kind of settled down. Like, the older you get, the anxiety shifts and you become much more comfortable in your skin and who you are. That is very true. You've reached the Shaggy Auntie's call centre. Want advice you can't ask your real aunties for? Like, how do you ask for what you want in bed? Not sure which hole is a goal? Where do

anal beads really go? Have you been faking orgasms your whole adult life? Accidentally called your boss daddy? Is your longtime love not going down south? For more than just the tip, we're here for you. Yes, you. And you. And you. Okay, it's time now for the... Shagany Aunties! And our lovely Gen Z guests are Shagany nieces. Oh, I'm so glad they're here. That's wrong, that's wrong. I don't actually like that.

What's a Shagany? Sorry. So Shag... Do you know Agony Aunt? Yeah. Agony Aunt. Shagany Aunt. That's clever.

Hey, listeners, if you're listening now, the generation divide has happened clearly. No, no, no, it's Shagany. agony arms agony arms that's clever hey listeners if you're listening now the generation divide has happened clearly no no no it's shaggany shaggany like agony

shaggany anyway sorry sorry no no you're absolutely fine so our lovely Gen Z guests in the script here

it's got nieces but I don't think you're nieces cousins? cousins cousins work lovely Gen Z cousins sorry I've written this and now i

don't want to read it i'm just gonna say maybe you guys can help us with our um shaggy auntie dilemma so every episode we have someone that sends a problem a dilemma and we give advice usually sometimes the wrong advice, sometimes very different advice. So we're going to read it out and you guys give your opinions. I'm excited. I like these things. Yeah, so do I. Love them. And for all of those listening, please remember to ask the bill payers permission

before calling us shagging the aunties who are not medical professionals and bear no responsibility for the consequences of your own actions. I will now read the dilemma. Hi, Poppy and Robina. I'm a 28-year-old straight woman and I went on 15 first dates in 2023

and only two of those led to second dates what's that was that me sounds like 15 and there were no third dates i don't know what i'm doing wrong as i almost always feel like they went better than they did and end up getting ghosted or i get the dreaded it's not you it's me style rejection message i used to be so confident but i get the dreaded it's not you it's me style rejection message i used to be so confident but i'm starting to think it must be me and i can't be asked to go through the same experience in 2024 any advice for how i reset my dating life should i start manifesting god that is a real gen z thing you guys manifesting um manifesting in my opinion works oh you're putting it out into the universe and whether or not like

the universe is going to give it to you because you're kind of like drilling it into your head you will automatically start doing it it's like a it's like a internal thing for yourself like whether you believe in the universe and the universe giving you things or whatever whenever you start like telling yourself a certain thing that will automatically start happening regardless but going back to like her dilemma um i have a friend who's actually on the other side of that like who has gone on so many dates but has ghosted every single one um just because she's a very picky person and she gets the it quite easily um so I can understand where she's coming from and I can also understand where my friend's coming from because there could

be just things that just don't match between you two um maybe it's the date like the choice of activity that you're doing interesting because I don't know about you but like I prefer like on a first date for it to be an activity because i get really awkward otherwise like i come across as like a very confident person but like when we're like sitting down having dinner i'm just like what do we talk about so and i get really fascinating to me i i love um i fucking can't stand activity i mean i'll do it obviously if i have to that's good good advice, though, to her. It's really good advice, yeah. Like, try bowling. Try different activities. Like, I don't know. Yeah.

No, I like it. What about you? I think I have the secret to, like, a successful date. Oh, my God. Here we go. Listen up, listeners. I believe that on your first date, yeah, be the best version of you. Don't be real.

Like, you know, like, you think, but I want to have a guy that, like, the ugly me he sees the cute me he sees the perfect me blah blah on your first date it's too early to be ugly it's too early to be real it's too early to like you cannot be like that on your first date because guess what the guy's gonna assume the worst he's gonna look in the future and be like this is gonna wake up and look like a mess i'm not trying to wake up next to that so guys are very futuristic, you know? They like robots and stuff, so they think future. So let's think about it. If you go on a first date,

you're looking cute, you're acting pretty, yeah, you're acting like the perfect girl. He's going to think about this, and he's going to extrapolate. What's she going to look like in five years? What's she going to look like during pregnancy? What's she going to look like after a drunk night out?

What's she going to look like with no makeup? First date, you play the system. You you look the best you act the best you act sexy you want to like be mysterious yeah second date let's say you unlock the second date mysterious in the first date he wants to know more second date booked then you're in the second date you give him a little bit more information still be mysterious still be hot third date when he starts falling for you slowly start unleashing the real you slowly slowly slowly

we used to say that all the time make him fall in love with you and then show him the crazy for real that's literally my mantra he's too far gone he's told his friends

he's told his parents what's he going to do you locked that bitch in lol also I saw a TikTok as well about when you meet a new person and your pre if your

previous relationship before that has been absolutely rubbish like for example god forbid they've abused you they've given you like some really bad trauma do not tell your next man oh no because they will be using that oh i only have to one up her ex to be fair. No, you need to tell her. I just have to be this much better. Yeah, you need to tell your next man. He used to pay for everything. He used to take me on holiday. He used to book me Ubers.

He used to drive me everywhere. It sounds very financial, your last relationship. But yes, he was a good person and kind. Transactional. That too. Yeah. The important things. I've got some controversial advice.

Go for it. Can I go before you? Yeah, do it. So just like, let's crunch these numbers down. Okay. She is not a Gen Z-er. She's a very young millennial. She's gone on 15 first dates.

She clearly wants to be in a relationship. Two of those have led to second dates. I think, and I'm sorry, I'm going to be honest producers and I hope you don't cut this out I think because I go out on dates with 24 year old men um so and and I think the moment you're keen when I said 24 a month it wasn't me trying to it was basically I I get an insight into that Gen Z mindset right I kind of get a glimpse of it. I think she's being too keen. I think that's kind of my advice too. I think you are.

It sounds like she wants a relationship. And if you're getting ghosted, and I hate people who ghost, it's the language I will never partake in. I will always tell someone, I'm sorry, I'm not into you. It's not happening. Bye, goodbye, see you later.

She's obviously getting, and people ghost. It's fucking hard out there in the dating world. She's getting ghosted. She's getting the, it's not you. It's me. That is straight out of a fucking shit chick flick. Um, you, my love, and I hate saying this and I hate saying this and I, and maybe we don't say it enough. It probably is you a bit. It's probably also the kind of guys you're dating, right? But you need to treat them mean keep them keen a bit of what you said

karishma your best fucking badass self men can smell that shit from a mile away you're right i think they can smell that keenness from a mile away these guys i'm just like i don't give a fuck about you 28 and you met 15 people in one year you got to kiss a lot of frogs in in the life you know i went on so many 15 days it's like what that's just like one day a month plus another and you met 15 people in one year you got to kiss a lot of frogs in the life you know I went on so many 15 dates it's just like

one date a month plus another three that's it you haven't done that much I know it feels like you've done loads because you went on all these dates

and you felt like it was some sort of failure but every single day that you did you learned something about yourself and you learned what you didn't want

and you learned what your expectations are with people as well so you know you're going to find that person can I say something yeah

you know like have you heard the theory the woman who only flew first class because she couldn't even afford it she only flew first class because she wanted the first class man she wanted a man who sits in first class can afford first class so she only booked first class tickets until she found the husband in the seat next to her so if she's looking for a romantic go to a coffee shop if you're looking for a guy that likes the movies go to her so if she's looking for a romantic go to a coffee shop if you're looking for a guy that likes the movies go to the movies if you're looking for a guy that likes running and gym and blah blah blah go to the gym find out what your interests are what you like yeah dating apps are too like there's too much of a spectrum he could be really good in the gym

and he could be like really crap at some other stuff what i said to our mutual friend our friend we have a mutual friend who's moved to London and I said to her, babe, you're going to have to, it's going to be hard work and you've got to put yourself out there

and you've got to be willing to put yourself, you've got to accept the fact that it's going to be a fucking schlep. You know when I go out on a date, do you know what I have to do? I have to put an SOS alert.

Do you know what that is? I fling out all that four or five tomatoes. I had to text four or five of the mandem to see what one will stick. And I'm reasonably attractive and I'm funny. Yeah, it's a numbers game. It's a numbers game.

Also, for this specific listener, like one thing I definitely want to tell you is it's not you at all. No, it's not you. It's dating. It's modern dating. It's the modern lower level and you're doing everything right. Yes. Because you're putting yourself out there. You're getting out on those dates.

And even when that second date doesn't come around to the third, you're starting again. And I respect you. Because you're putting yourself out there. You're getting out on those dates. And even when that second date doesn't come around to the third, you're starting again. And I respect you. Keep going. He's out there. And maybe he's looking for a quickie. Like, maybe he's just...

Then send him to me. Maybe he's trying to get it on the first date. Maybe you're looking at the wrong man. No, it's not. And you're absolutely right. That's a great note to end it on. It is just, yeah. That's all for now.

Thank you for listening. If you have any thoughts, questions or dilemmas for the Shagany Aunties, you can email us at browngirlsdoittoo at bbc.co.uk. Or you can send us a WhatsApp or voice note to 07968 Sorry, try again.

Sorry, I fucked it up. Or you can send us a WhatsApp or voice note to 07968 108 2 2 And like huge thanks to our guests I fucked it up I fucked it up or you can send us a whatsapp or voice note to 07968 108 2 2 and like huge thanks to our guests

it's been such a joy you guys are amazing I'm gonna follow you and you guys should make loads of fucking money and be amazing it's been such so privileged to be here

in awe real profound moments from both of you honestly hashtag what is it social media SMCC

you fucking loser you didn't even know you were a fucking hashtag it's not my hashtag it's their hashtag no it's sport hashtag I'm never saying that