BudPod with Phil Wang & Pierre Novellie - Episode 18 - BeerPod!

Episode Date: July 1, 2019

BEERPOD! BudPissed! We are 18! Happy Birthday! Offensive jokes, mad gig gammon, racist twitter troll hunting, distended bellies, the most surprising or strange thing to be turned on by, sexy cartoons, Emily Maitlis the AVATAR of NEWS, trying to buy pints, Sick Booze/VomBooze, the legs/trustworthiness scale, pooing out your memories, high risk greetings, #KOJI2012, cool virgins and spider leg-dicks. Get bonus BudPod on Patreon! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello! The Budpod is 18! Ah! The Budpod's first legal beer. You've got, um... We don't have a strong position on brands here. So, you've gone for a punk IPA. I've got a punk IPA to ring in the podcast's fledgling adulthood. There's nothing more punk

than ale. There's nothing more punk and anti-establishment in drinking a 5,000 year old beer that your father loves. What could be more punk than drinking what Nigel Farage drinks but it is a little hoppy I suppose

I'm always a little conflicted about punk Brewdog because their beers are actually very delicious but Christ are they lame yeah they're so naff, all the marketing is like

um oh we found these hops in our bicycle I don't know how to make that up this beer was inspired by the taste of the morning after a download festival right that's it, sorry that's what I was trying to get at was inspired by the taste of the morning after a download festival. Right, right.

That's it. Sorry, that's what I was trying to get at. I wonder if there's anything on the box. I won't look at it. But yeah, it's trying to imbue a drink with a lifestyle, which is not new in advertising I suppose. But it's always irritating. The punkiest thing they could do is just go, no, it's beer.

Yeah, it's beer. Drink it, you loser. You piece of shit. Although the advertising stuff, restrictions for booze in the UK are very strong. The way you're allowed to advertise it, like you can't advertise it as a replacement for anything. You can't advertise it as like,

it just tastes better than drinks that don't have booze in. You could sort of loosely imply it but not really right it's very like that's why so many like I'm drinking

one of those Guinness things cans that's got a noodley in it a nood oh like the scuba scuba yeah

and like that's why all the apparently I have a friend who was telling me that because he works in the booze industry and he was saying that's why the Guinness ads tend to be so abstract because that's one all the apparently I have a friend who was telling me that because he works in the booze industry and he was saying that's why the Guinness ads

tend to be so abstract because that's one of the easiest ways of just avoiding all this crap they just go right it's a horse and it turns out the horse is Guinness

there buy some fucking Guinness in Malaysia where I grew up in Sabah it's called something like the saba effect but uh saba state in borneo has the highest import of guinness in the world or something oh yeah like it has a lot of guinness export which is different it's it tastes like a malty health drink it's very

sour it was invented the sour malty version of guinness was invented uh in response i think to the west african market okay nigeria and ghana and stuff because like you know malt drinks very popular in that part of the world and so they're like right let's make guinness more like uh and like african certainly like like like native black south african traditional beer is made from sorghum I think and it's a lot more like sour and malty sorghum beer yeah the only reason I know that is because my my grandfather was a biochemist he was a big nerd and he was he never drank but he was brewing scientist yeah and also he's been well he never drank but he studied it yeah

what a pervert yeah maybe like the whole time he was just like oh it could be so delicious to although maybe once beer becomes something

in a test tube you're like I don't want to drink that that's poison it's a bit of busman's holiday I guess yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah

I guess like sometimes when we do a gig and someone in our family says want to hear a joke and you go no that's the last thing I want to hear right now tell me something tragic

also when someone in your family says do you want to hear a joke if you say yes and they tell you the joke the best case scenario is that it is good and they can tell that you're really surprised and that's still insulting because they can see that you're surprised surprised right and that's still insulting because right they can see that you're surprised that they told a good joke it's still not good for them like you're still

seem rude so the other the alternatives are i will laugh but i'll still be surprised and i'll be rude or i won't laugh and you'll be like no i i sometimes will get told a joke by some dude I sometimes will get told a joke by some dude after a gig or something. And it's always fucking ghastly. Very racist, very sexist or something. And I always laugh. I always laugh at how horrible it is. Because I find that very funny. I find horrible things very funny.

But then I feel bad because I'm encouraged to keep telling the joke. But I've only laughed at it because it's so horrible. And at some point they'll stand up at Christmas dinner while someone is led away from the family dining table crying. And they'll say, Phil Wang liked it! He said it was good! And they'll go, well... He said it was interesting!

He laughed and was shaking his head a lot. While he was laughing. He kept saying, oh boy, and wow. He kept saying lot while he was laughing he kept saying oh boy and wow he kept saying wow he was amazed by it he was literally wowed by this joke you're all philistines

for not getting that your fans should be called philistines but then it makes them sound like they're dumb to like me yeah but then maybe you could be that kind of you know like those celebrities who are like rude in a fun way to all their fans. Right. You degenerates, you know. Well, a couple of people who follow me have floated the wankers.

Wankers. But I just think that's too horrible. It's also statistically just sort of obvious, isn't it? Yeah, it's true. It doesn't mean everyone knows. It's also statistically just sort of obvious, isn't it? Yeah, it's true. It's not something everyone knows. It's people, you know. Yeah. How weird, how surreal would it be

if a random girl came up to you after a gig and told you a joke? Wouldn't that make you feel like you'd gone insane? So if instead of the usual, which is a dude, can we go and tell me a joke? Yeah, instead of the usual, which is either a dude who is sort of really immature looking, like he looks like a 19-year-old on a night out, or a guy who's 43? Yeah.

Those are the two options that you have. Instead, if it was just like, what would be the most surreal? Where you can't even think, oh, this is them flirting with me because they like the show. You can't even think, oh, this is them flirting with me because they like the show. It's like a lady in her 40s who isn't even drunk and just completely just wants to tell you a joke. I've got a joke for you. Yeah, you can't. I can't even picture that happening.

Yeah. I would think something was going on, but I don't know what. I'd be very suspicious. Yeah. I'd be like, is this documentary? I'd be very suspicious. Yeah. Maybe like, am I... Is this documentary? Is that a camera somewhere? How weird is that? Yeah.

It just wouldn't happen. What's... I was about to say, what's the worst joke you've ever... No. Let's not go down that road. Because I can only imagine they are harrowing on the basis of some of the jokes I've been told. I have such a bad memory. I can't...

Oh, but you get told extra horrible things because you're South African. Yeah. And they, it's like, it's an even, it's an even grosser feeling than when you walk past some of those doorways in Soho and like the lady leaning out the doorway

has ignored like 10 people and then they look at you, they point at you, oh, you do one of us what what about my appearance suggests that i'm the perv of the like the 10 people who've just walked past they've they've looked at you and gone you're in for this kind of a human trafficking experience or the person flyering for a nightclub yeah that bothers everyone until you turn up and you're just like you want to see the prostitute down the road yeah there's a this she's leaning out the door you can't miss it yeah i get told really horrifying uh things quite a lot uh because i'm a white

south african so everyone kind of thinks in their head like i know what he likes i know what'll float his boat yeah i um i sometimes um disappoint myself with what i will put up with yeah out of politeness i've i've i've seen we've we did that gig together where there was that couple in their early 60s. Yeah. It was that old gig above the Queen's Head near Piccadilly Circus, remember? Oh, of course. And they were like...

I was talking about... Yes, well, I was doing my set. And I was talking about being Chinese in there. And people are enjoying it. Why wouldn't they be? I'm adorable. And I eventually say, but I'm half white. My mum's white.

And this lady goes, oh, yeah. I thought your hair looked normal. I said, what? And she said, you got normal hair, ain't ya? I said, what? And she said, you've got normal hair, ain't ya? I said, normal? So she couldn't quite get the measure of me because I looked Chinese, but my hair was too normal to be Chinese. Your hair was just too human for you to possibly be Chinese.

And it wasn't her husband after we got off stage. It was you, me, and Nish had also been on. Nish Kumar had been on and we'd all been talking about race and he said it's a good show but

can we can we leave it with the race stuff can we not talk about race can we not talk about racism and race and then I said

oh did you feel particularly targeted by those bits because we were talking about how racists are stupid yeah and he said, yes.

And we just looked at him as if maybe the penny would drop. As if he would go, like... It was an incredible admission to watch happen live. And he really stuck with it. He was like, yeah. I felt very put upon here at the anti-Nazi rally, or whatever. It was so surreal. Although you did a very funny improvisation back to the woman.

Oh, yeah. You said, good old-fashioned normal hair like King Henry used to have. I don't know if I did the accent. You did. You did. You did. Totally. Oh, that doesn't sound...

That sounds braver than I... No, no. This was like four interruptions in. This wasn't your immediate reaction. This was like after you try and really interrogate what this fucking woman was about. Yeah, and they were like your classic Brexity sort of grey hair. We've just come in from Bimblesborough for a day out in London.

And they were there in their sort of wind cheaters, you know. Yeah. And they were very upset that we'd... Not wind breakers. They don't break wind. They cheat. They cheat wind. Whereas here on Budpod we break. Obviously we break wind on Budpod. Yes, well, Budpod is

now a proud 18. We're legal to drink. I hope you're drinking along if you don't drink alcohol please drink along with something non-alcoholic and tweet us tweet us what tweet us what drinks tweet us a picture of what you're drinking while you listen

yes and we would like the headphones or the radio or whatever to be in the shot as well that would be nice yeah just send in your photos of how you're celebrating Bud Pod's

18th birthday yes please and if you don't please don't show show us you fucking your phone or something

fucking your laptop because you could have done that at 16 or drinking piss or anything we're doing a big poo anything weird that would freak us out yeah um if you don't drink booze well first of all drink responsibly

if you do drink booze uh if you don't drink booze don't drink booze responsibly yeah don't drink a hundred liters of milk you'll die i can only assume you'd die. I don't think you'd be able to get to... Isn't that... That was a challenge on Jackass or similar. It's the gallon challenge. The gallon challenge. No one can drink a gallon of milk. Which, you think

someone must be able to. I'm sure. I mean, there are people who eat lightbulbs. There's got to be a hero out there in the dark somewhere. Out there in the dark.. With a big hop. Out there in the dark! A hollow belly begging for milk. Yeah.

Somewhere. You'd think so, wouldn't you? Um, if you can drink more than a gallon of milk, tweet in. Tweet us a picture of your horrifyingly distended belly. Which it turns out is a type of porn. No. Yeah, boy. Distended bellies? Uh-huh.

Like after having eaten too much? Yeah. For God's sake. There is no limit to humans' ability to get horned up on absolute nonsense. The specificity of it. Yes, it's weird. I spend too much time on twitter but i have friends who spend even more time on twitter and the internet than i do and they send

me horrifying memes and things from reddit and stuff so you just end up learning these things about humanity that you didn't need to know but uh yeah, distended bellies, that's a whole category. That's a whole thing. What is the most surprising thing you've been turned on by? Most surprising thing I've been turned on by? Yeah, like you saw something and you go, ooh. And you went, oh, what was I? What is the strangest kink?

I mean, you don't have to divulge this, but is there anything that has happened and turned you on and surprised you? Ooh. Well, when I was younger, I found some cartoon characters very attractive. Sure. Which the internet has led me to believe is common,

but I don't think it's actually that common. Oh, the Mrs. Rabbit or whatever. But she wasn't... She was was still like a human she was humanoid what about the um the lady rabbit in space jam yes yes yes lola bunny lola bunny even the name sexy sorry i should clarify that's me smacking my finger, not the staff. Phil just got my dick out. Phil got hard, got his dick out, and started spanking it. That's how much... Within a second of me saying the name Lola Bunny. That's how immediate the effect was.

It was Proustian. Lola Bunny... Like, so many of the characters in, like, the Robin Hood. Oh, yeah, the fox. All the foxes. Both of them. Yeah, the dude's really sexini. That maybe would be the surprising one.

It was really great to fight Gamps. I remember thinking, God, our thighs are far apart. Those two foxes. Wow, they've got such animalistic hip structure they're gonna get hip dysplasia like an Alsatian when they're older

hmm have you got anything in mind what has turned me on by surprise um the occasional

politician oh yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah uh they love newsreaders joanna gosling who's that she's a bbc newsreader i really i think i think newsreaders must be like the next category of people who get all the stalkers and lunatics right like emily metlis is what metlis yes yes yes yes incredibly yes yes yes just because how terrifying she is yes she's got pointy eyes her eyes point right at you hey oh what did you mean by that oh no yeah yeah yeah that's fair

yeah she someone like her she feels like not so much a journalist but something the news itself has created to protect itself you know she's like an agent smith

so she's the avatar of the news yeah of the truth or something like how in a lot of fantasy if there's like a god of thunder

yeah they'll have like a representative on earth who's like half as powerful right okay yeah like the god of the force of thunder channels through its earthly host that's what an avatar was

you know always yeah she is the news like she can turn at you and speak and like you know when they have like a hundred voices at once you're watching BBC news if she looks at you with the power of all news

You just say your secrets Like Wonder Woman's truth rope Yeah and you always say This is the news and then you tell your secrets It's just in and then you tell your secrets And then in between every secret there's a big bong Like Big Ben that you tell your secret. And then in between every secret there's a big bong. Like Big Ben.

I embezzle money from my place of work. Bong. But you don't do the bong. It just happens in the room around you. Oh, and here, the reason I... Watch out. Try to stay away from the edge of the road there. The reason we're here is because this roundabout is said...

The local legend is that it's haunted. It's haunted roundabout. It's. Yes. The roundabout is a. It's haunted. And. There have been sightings.

Of what? A ghost. A ghost. Right. Yeah. Okay. On the roundabout. Yes. Or like circling it like a car uh on on in the middle yeah on the yes in the middle i'm not sure what you're getting at i'm starting to regret

buying tickets for this ghost well no because the well the ghost the car but the sightings there have been sightings right they're in the local paper. It's well established. Right? Yeah, what have people seen? Well, they've seen a man, a desperate man, trying to convince people of things. He stands in the center of the roundabout. Okay. And he's waving his hands, and he's saying,

You have to believe me. Something about a town hall, I think. Right. Is this ghost maybe saying, Please believe me, this roundabout is haunted actually it's funny you should say that that was one of the cab a local cab driver

quoted the ghost well this ghost sounds a lot like well it sounds a lot like you doesn't it it sounds like people are reporting you as as a ghost of the roundabout. And I actually don't think that the report in the newspaper was of a ghost of the roundabout.

I think the report probably went something like crazy local continues to rip off tourists who only have themselves to blame for wanting to go on holiday to Swindon. It was a mysterious sighting and they've never found who it was.

Well, I'm sure they have because it's you. Well, no because it would have been in the paper as well. They would have said unmasked the ghost has been. Well, it's probably that they don't

care who you are. The story just probably went, strange local man shouting coherently from roundabout about ghosts. Strange. Okay. Ah. I think we're getting that as some kind of victory. Yes. Ghosts are strange.

Right. But there aren't any ghosts. It's just you. Or is it? Yes. Right. But there are no ghosts. It's just you. Or is it? Yes. But look, if you just guide us back without getting us run over, I won't ask for

our refund. Fair enough. You and I went on a little troll hunt the other day. What? You and I hitched up our pick up Got our internet guns Well I tweeted something Which I thought was a very good observation Yes

About the show Chernobyl And it's not much of a spoiler Everyone knows it now But there's an episode where a bunch of dogs get killed Yeah Because they're contaminated As you would imagine that some dogs would get killed as part of you know a tremendous huge nuclear disaster and um and i was reading a review of

chernobyl that's called those scenes the most difficult to watch and and just so the listener knows and just so to confirm because i haven't seen it am i correct in saying phil they're saying the scenes with the dogs getting shot are the most difficult to watch. However, there is a bit where someone essentially melts. Melts into a jelly slowly in detail. In great pain. Yeah. And like going...

Like the makeup artist went deep dive research into what would happen if you were exposed to a lot of radiation and basically realised you melt slowly and painfully into a red jelly. Oh, God. Jesus Christ. And they don't shy away from showing you.

No, I've seen a screenshot of what I immediately assumed was a corpse from a million years ago, but it was actually like a living fireman. And they're still like... They're still talking about that. And they're still like they're still talking like that and they're still so irradiated

they're put in steel coffins put in the ground while their family watch and covered in concrete Jesus Christ but the bit where Fido

gets a quick painless death to the face is the most difficult thing to watch fucking hell and so I tweeted that and then signed it off with,

Fuck me, white people. Which? Which is a sort of running joke among non-white people, that white people love dogs a creepy amount. Yes. Which I think you would admit to, because you really like your dogs. I love my dogs. But you also have to admit that it's a uniquely white thing to really, really love your dogs. I love my dogs. But you also have to admit that it's a uniquely white thing to really, really love your dogs.

Yes. Well, see, as a white South African, I am not coddled by being the majority in the country where I'm from. And therefore, I've never been able to pretend that anything I do is normal in the sense that it's what everyone does. Because it hasn't been. And yeah, absolutely. I I mean I love dogs and even I don't love dogs as much as I would say Midwestern Americans seem to love their dogs or a lot of British people seem to

love their dogs or they just let them do whatever they want a lot of southern English people love their dogs but also like South Africa is still even like the white people in South Africa who love their dogs more than a lot of other ethnic groups on average which is definitely true uh we it's still they're still like a workman like like well the dog ideally is like home security or like people

are still pretty strict with them you know yeah it's it's probably how british people treated their dogs in 1910 where it's like it's not living inside, it's living like a farm dog in the garden in a sort of waterproof cage I'm not letting it jump on the couch and piss on my child's cot or whatever the fuck but now they're sort of family members with special

treatment they're like a really ill relative they have to sleep on the floor and they're like they're like a really ill relative yeah yeah they have to sleep on the floor and they run around and so once i tweeted this once i tweeted this i got a bunch of retweets a bunch of likes a bunch of people going ha ha ha but eventually i started getting people who are quite annoyed by it and the kind the type of tedious fucks who say dogs are better than people. Yeah. And then all the racists started. Now obviously there's a pretty obvious line to go down when a visibly Chinese person

says that dogs might not be the most important thing in the world. Yeah. And that line was trampled on again and again and again by these people. The rush to go down that line by racists, it was like the Titanic. They were cramming on board that lifeboat and rowing furiously. And at first a couple were just like, well, yeah, you probably wanted to eat them, didn't you? And I read that and I was expecting it and I went, ha ha ha. I like that kind of joke. But eventually it just got proper racist. Like, you probably butter them up, don't you, you stupid chink.

At least white people are real people. And I was like, ha ha. But I'm so desensitised to this, I started screenshotting them and I texted them to you and said, should I report these? Because it got to the point where they were so violent that they were, I guess, illegal. Oh, they're very much so. Yeah, yeah. Very much so. And you were like, oh, yeah, you should. And so we just sort of double teamed scrolling.

It took me like an hour. It takes ages. Although the funniest thing was like when you report a tweet and it goes, this is the one tweet uh you can report up to five yeah do you want to pick any other ones yeah to back up your case or whatever the fuck and like up till then the only tweet i've seen from this person is their one racist tweet at you and then uh report to go do you want to pick and and the tweets that you let you choose like the next four are they most recent yeah and it was like the top one was like hey phil you're a subhuman or whatever and then the next four would be like just oh muslims are even like it like it would it

would end up jews and i'd be like well i could just highlight uh all of these and it was either the first five are all like straight out of hitler's dreams or it would be like, well, I could just highlight all of these. And it was either the first five are all like straight out of Hitler's dreams. Or it would be like, Phil, you're a subhuman. And then the next four would be like tweeting at BBC Weather. Will it be sunny in Felixstowe? My grandson was having a barbecue or some mad fucking old people on Twitter shit. Yeah. Also, a lot of the worst tweets you got were from people like

with dog pictures as their like account picture and all of these people are either the picture is a picture of their pet dog or cat or it's the most ugly like pallid gloopy middle England middle aged person selfie you've ever seen. It's taken

from like bollock level. There's a triple chin they look bright red or ghostly pale uh they're all bald even men or women don't matter they're all just bald they all look like it's like uncle fester just taking a selfie and they're all furious with your funny chernobyl treat fuck me though it was a cesspit. It was absolutely terrible. I think that's the most racist piece I've ever got online. Most of these trolls... Yeah, have nothing else,

that's why they do it. It's actually why I leave them alone most of the time, because that's all they have. They live in a scene from the movie Seven. It's just cups and mould and... Yeah. They're that guy

that everyone is shocked is still alive he's breathing and he's breathing and that's and dr cox from scrubs gets really freaked out because he got really close to

your face that's who that is oh yeah of course yeah the guy dr cox from scrubs yeah he leans really close into the guy to say you got what you deserved and the guy

goes and scares the crap out of him it's such a great terrible movie it's if you watch it when you're a teenager nothing more

there's nothing more profoundly horrifying because it's such a nihilistic film yeah yeah but the sound mixing is dreadful

is it? it's impossible you cannot hear what they're saying. I was like, is this just me? I looked it up and there are other comments saying there are reviews saying it sounds like it's mixed in mud. And I just didn't

realise how it got to that point. You cannot understand. That's bizarre. I have quite bad hearing it seems with films anyway. But sometimes they do fuck it up. Anyway, we didn't come here to talk about the film Seven. All right? We came here to drink beers and celebrate our podcast's 18th birthday.

Yeah. Do you remember what you did for your 18th birthday? Yes. I think I do, yeah. It's a sort of house party thing. You had cool parents yeah I remember before

I turned 18 in Bath there was one pub where that was known for serving underage people for like not really checking

and I went in there once before I was 18 I feel like in my memory I was completely alone but I can't have been and I went up to the guy in the bar and I said can't have been. And I went up to the guy in the bar, and I said,

can I have a pint of Cronenberg 1664, please? Because he used to say the whole name. Could I please have a pint of Guinness Stout bottled and brewed in Dublin, please? Can I have a pint of Cronenberg 1664? in Dublin please and he said do you have any ID and I said no and he said why can't serve you then and then I said is there anything you can do but like like like i was a mobster handing over like a thousand dollars yeah in my hand yeah but i wasn't i wasn't offering him anything i just said is there anything you can do as if you'd go yeah all right i'll just jeopardize my job. My license. Because you've asked. To me, it sounds like...

If anything, you've now confirmed to me that you are underage whilst asking me to take this risk. Yeah, I was right to ask. It sounds to me like you are someone who's just been told they had a terrible illness. Is there anything you can do? I'm afraid not. I see.

I'll start making my arrangements then to drink at home in secret yeah i um yeah we had the the underage drinking on the island was when i assume still is pretty pretty big um because yeah everyone sort of had quite cool parents and also they all didn't know people just didn't care just no one cared that much they wouldn't like

let you have like vodka well I mean but like beers or you know you get in a car what are you going to crash into well that

that they would be more worried about but yeah in the countryside it's like well trees and cows i guess um but what did you what did you do for your 18th i genuinely cannot remember i would

have been in bath i had like three friends i don't fuck i i asked this question presuming i would have my own story but i can't for the life of me remember what it is. God, that's depressing. Well, this is part of... Listener Phil is very worried that his mind is rotting. In this case, I think it is more that it was so unremarkable that there's more in memory. Well, 16, you went to the Italian restaurant. Yeah, that's right.

So 18 Fuck When was it? No wonder 18 You must have just gone to a pub or something right? Or maybe to a restaurant with booze Probably You know what?

I was a restaurant boy I've always been a restaurant boy You've always been a restaurant boy I was probably a restaurant You've always been a fine diner Yeah A fine diner A fine diner

Look at how much he's eating He is a fine diner He's fine diner. Look at how much he's eating. He is a fine diner. He's eating it in exactly the right way, too. Well, where I grew up in Malaysia, all the men would be very impressed if you could eat a lot. Really? Which I think was part of the reason I became so fat. Yeah.

Because I would be eating at a buffet or something, just loads. And the other men would tell my dad, which just means, wow wow he can eat and my father goes yes yes pat me proudly on the back and i think you're on your fat fat internalized that that was impressive things we eat a lot so i just ate and ate and ate so so it was like uh like a strength thing or just like wow what a boy I don't know it feels like proper

oldie worldie old timey if you are very fat you look rich rich and sort of splendid yeah which is still like it was impressive to be fact. It's still a thing,

but it's like in the Far East, my limited understanding of talking to friends, mutual friends of ours or friends of mine who are like women from China. It's very much like a guy thing. Yeah, well, women is opposite.

You have to be so small. Like a tiny bird. Whereas if you're a guy, you have to be so small like a tiny a tiny bird whereas if you're a guy you have to be a blob a big seal yeah giant walrus of a man probably jane giz khan stuff yeah he's married to a tiny bird Hark to me, proud men of Northumberland. Hark to me well before this, our greatest battle to date. Remember, you are not just men of Northumberland. You are the partial landowning class of a feudal and pre-feudal mixture of societies. Yes, you have slightly greater rights because you have the right to carry a spear when called upon by your lord, who in this case is me.

by your lord, who in this case is me. And don't forget that your enemy over there across the valley are the equivalent from very nearby. They speak the same tongue as you, but don't let that deceive you. We will defeat them on account of our marginally more efficient pattern welding

techniques and our innovative cavalry formations. And the fruits of this battle in which you risk your lives will be that I am in charge of even more people like you and make them do this again and again until presumably I'm dead or bored or overthrown. And you and your family will benefit in some loose, indefinable way, I assume. I don't check in until I need you, which I do today. So, men of Northumberland, grab your spears and shields and get ready to defend your land from essentially me, but different, with different hair, but maybe a slightly...

Maybe they'll tax you more. The religion's the same. It's hard to say what the point of this is if you're not me. And I am me. And that's why we're doing it. Because I said so. Now fight, brave men of Northumberland. To arms! It's a second can of shmeness.

Kines shmeness. This is us, of course, Phil, exercising our right to bear cans. Our right to bear cans, which we laid out in the podcast. Episode two, three, maybe? Pretty early on, the old right to bear cans. Way before this podcast could drink. Yeah. Just as this podcast is starting to walk.

Just like George Washington fought for us. To have our right to bear cans. What? Magna Canta, of course, was... Yes, nice. Magna Canta. Signed by brewers and drinkers.

Yes. It was signed by King John after the Bironial Revolt. This is beyond my reach. They were barons. Bironial. That's the problem. You bought a knife to a gunfight, Phil.

I bought a knife to a gunfight. Phil. A knife to a gunfight. Okay, here's a good question. What booze, if it was the only booze you could ever drink again, would mean that you just didn't drink instead? Rum. Really? Yeah, rum. Rum is like, you know, everyone has their sick booze.

Oh, vom booze. Everyone is like, you know, everyone has their sick booze. Oh, vom booze. Yeah, and there have been boozes that I've vommed on that I've sort of forgiven. And we've made up and we now get on quite well. Sure. But rum is something that I've never really forgiven. When was Rumgate?

Must have been teens, like mid-teens or something. But there's something specifically sickly about it. It always brings me back to puking. Oh, yeah. And to rum, I think. Is that the only one? For me, one of the main ones. Not that it comes up a lot.

And cheap, bad wine, but that's just bad wine. Yeah. But blanket, any type of alcohol, it's rum. Otherwise, I'm a bit of a booze hound and i'll drink anything yes tequila is not ideal but really fancy tequila is very nice though sure yeah if they're fancy and they're in the freezer they're nice yeah put them in the freezer keep vodka in a freezer for a while when you pour it it's like syrupy it's very nice if it's good yeah vodka tequila vodka okay um there is some proper way of drinking tequila that I'm unaware of. But Chris Betts, comedian and friend of the podcast, is a huge fan of tequila.

Oh, tequila. And in one of his many lives as an incredible private barman, he knows all the best tequilas. And sipping ones, you know, like nice. For me, weirdly, I got really ill when I was a teenager. Someone brought Cointreau. Oh. That thick orange gloop. Yeah, that reeks of this is all I could steal from my parents.

Absolutely, yeah. It was disgusting. I would never drink again if it was Cointreau, if it was... What does Cointreau taste like? I can't even think of it. Like orange cough medicine. It is. It's orange liqueur, right?

Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. What's that licorice one? Oh, fuck. Sambuca. Yeah. Yeah, I could happily...

Oh, yeah. Okay. For me, Sambuca. Sambuca is like... It's like Bertie Bassett's piss. Just this gloopy licor liquor or cum or whatever. It's horrible. It's the worst booze in the world.

Malibu? Malibu. You can do Malibu. Just the only booze you ever have in your life. There's Malibu. There are other flavors though, aren't there? There's like peach Malibu. Is that better?

It's better than licorice. No, Malibu's coconut. Oh yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I'm not gonna. I'd rather have nothing. Dude, that was my first ever drink when I saw a drink was Malibu and Coke. I could only drink Malibu and Coke. Can you believe that?

From the off, I was a beer guy. That's nice. That's good for you. Carlsberg. Tins. Yikes. Beer time. Beer o'clock. I found them too spicy. I needed some lovely sweetness. I was quite lame, and then when drinking became a thing, my ability to drink beer was a real...

I couldn't drink a lot of beer necessarily, but I could down beer very quickly. You ever seen someone down a yard? Not live. No. I've seen clips of like, watch this person finish a yard of ale how much is a yard what's in a yard it's a lot it's a lot well is it it looks

like four pints mmm it looks like you need a distended belly to cope with it no guys I can down a pint in like three and a half seconds I can finish a pint very quickly and it makes you feel awful it's the bubbles that do for me it foams you up if it's something like Guinness or Ale then it's easier sure that's what the pros use

like when you find out that is it Kobayashi the hot dog eating man he dips his hot dogs in Sprite oh really the bread and sprite so it does that the bread doesn't fill him as much it's bright up I don't squeeze it he squeezes the air out of the bread I think it's like you to save on space I think maybe he dips it and then like maybe like sucks the sprite out of the bread and now the bread's like mush if you're kobayashi can you please please email in email in about your technique precisely about your hot dog eating technique the the pattern here though is is no gag reflex which is a kind of creepy that's like a skill that's most associated with creepy sex boasting how often was stuff

trying to climb in our mouths way in the past that we have a gag reflex? It was those eight spiders a year. They used to be much bigger in prehistoric times. You had to really hoik out a giant spider in the cave. Do you know how spiders move their legs? Is it hydraulics? Yeah, they have no muscles. They just pump blood into the leg they want to extend. So their legs are like dicks. Yeah, pretty much.

They've got eight dicks. Just getting boners. Oh god. That makes it even creepier how quickly they can move. Yeah, exactly. That's awful. God, they're gross. They, exactly. That's awful. God, they're gross.

They're really gross, but quite cool, I think. I think they're quite cool. The design is cool, but they themselves, you just think, something primeval is telling me not to trust this creature. Mmm. Yeah. I mean, we're programmed to trust things the more legs they have. Have you noticed that? We still trust humans.

Could we get them? Humans, two dogs i mean i don't speak for the trolls i've been facing but trust dogs a bit less yeah than humans they have four legs and then you get to ants six legs and you go all right i'm pretty sure these guys are just getting on with their lives yeah but I'm gonna keep I don't think they have my interests at heart but I think if we stay

out of each other's business I'm gonna keep an eye on it keep an eye on them but they're not an immediate threat spiders eight legs get that thing away from me

yeah kill that thing fuck that then we get up to fucking centipedes yeah centipedes millipedes then it's

no no no and in millipedes it starts to drop off actually when you get to a thousand legs, people go after you. It doesn't really matter. They go, he's too busy with his legs. Bring letters.

Keep getting them. Email. Phone call. Your sister. Keep it up. Make money. Correspondence. So, some correspondence Just a bit of catch up as well So, um

It's um First email we have Dear Feli Feli Wang Wang And Pierre Novaelli It's me, Ellie From the bees and the vomit, etc From the bees and the vomit etc from the bees and the vomit

it's the lady I made sick oh yes yes yes yes at the risk of coming across as shamelessly trying to shoehorn myself

into the podcast again I had to share this important news story with you especially in light of Sarah Brett joining the

investigation team setting out to unmask the slow poo this is radio 5 presenter Sarah Brett who is intrigued unmask the slow poo. This is Radio 5 presenter Sarah Brett who is intrigued as to

who our slow poo is. We haven't heard from her in a while actually. No. No we haven't. There was a woman in Hong Kong who used her muscles so much when doing a poo she lost 10 years worth of memories. Oh I've heard of this. Yeah. I think people tweeted this to us as well.

Okay. We're right on the wire when it comes to slow poo news. She was straining to poo and then she got amnesia. Could slow poo have had a point all along? There can't be some kind of middle ground on this issue.

Or can there? Here's a Vice article about the incident and then... And that links to the original story. I'd love that as an excuse for forgetting names because I forget people's names all the time.

If I could go, sorry, what's your name? I had a really hard shit last night. Sorry, I know we've met before but I've been having these harrowing poos and my brain is broken from all the

pooing. I've done squeezed your name out of my head. I squeezed the poo so hard your name flew out my head and into the toilet. And I flushed it away. Please help me. I flushed your name away. Your name is in the sewers now. Those are Taylor Swift lyrics. I flushed your name away. Your name is in the sewers now. It's very haunting. It's beautiful. She says, I've been anxiously waiting for you to cover it since the story broke. Incidentally, she says, I stand by my guess. What guess? I don't know the slope of who it is, but I don't remember what it was.

Well, it was wrong. Because we don't remember who we said. Yeah. I am more sure than ever. No. And so is my pal Ed about his guess. What's Ed's guess? I don't remember.

You have to remind us of your guesses, folks. Yeah. A lot of people have been having a lot of guesses about old Slowpoo. I will leave you a quick account of a time when I became somebody else's side quest, which unexpectedly switched into hard mode halfway through. For people, for somebody who's dropped into this, a side quest is just when a challenge or someone's storyline happens upon you in everyday life

and you weren't expecting it. Yeah, and you have to choose whether or not to engage. Some years ago when I was old enough to have a mobile phone but not mature enough to be on the family plan, my phone was stolen on a train. I was very upset and sought out a helpful-looking stranger to see if they would let me borrow theirs to call my parents. Very good. distraught about the phone. My parents said, what time is it there? It was at that point I remembered that they were on holiday in Australia, and hence the breeziness of their tone. I ended

the call on the stranger's phone as quickly as I could and scuttled away, mortified by the enormous charge I had certainly incurred. It was so long ago, I don't remember exactly what I said, but it was probably, okay, thank you. Keep jacking it fondly, Ellie. I always jack it fondly. Yeah, it's the only way to jack

it really man I wonder where that person is now I wonder if they ever survived that bill do you think maybe that that was what finally pushed them over the edge and they just murdered their whole family this bill is the straw that broke the camel's back and she sees that murder in the papers

and she goes like ooh ooh I hope I can talk about this on a podcast at some point um oh uh kate gets in touch hey kate hello p no and p wa that'll be piano valley and phil wang yeah alphabetical order no favoritism here uh i had a libertarian idea this week that was quite possibly the thought of a complete psychopath and therefore naturally I wanted to share that publicly. A dating app that matches suicidal

people with serial killers. Everyone! Everyone's a winner. Keep jacking it, Kate. That's good, isn't it? Yeah, what would you call it? I mean grinder almost works if they grind up

the bodies mmm organ grinder organ grinder organ grinder's good organ grinder tinder but we're gonna

burn your body I don't know killer with no e yeah killer cause that's for killers

and also it's killer it's really killer it's cool yeah and it's for killers. And also it's killer. It's really killer. It's cool. Yeah, and it's for killers and people who need a killer. Do you think a serial killer... Serial, serial... I mean, there's a podcast called Serial,

but I think serial would work because that's dating as well. You know, it's a serial process. Do you think that a serial killer would still enjoy it if it was in that scenario? If it was potential? Yeah.

No, probably not, right? I mean, some would. Some just want... I mean, I'm projecting here. God-like power. Yeah, but there's no power if you're sort of following someone else's desires, is there?

It's a good idea. We'll be to it. Yeah. We'll get... We'll just sell it. You get the first round of investments, but... Yeah, and we'll just sell it straight away first round of investments yeah and we'll just sell it straight away to Facebook yeah yeah yeah

we won't really they just want to buy out the competition at this point yeah yeah yeah we don't believe in it enough that we're going to push it to market but and we want to retire

but if you have any other ideas please let us know we'll be happy to sit around and talk about them yeah um Jack

get some touch greetings double Ps I wonder how he's going to sign off been listening since the heady days of episode one and the journeys to work

have certainly become more dangerous due to excessive laughing and disgust in equal measure causing me to swerve across lanes on multiple occasions

legendary jazz artist Brown Squiggles being the latest example that's quite a I mean I've laughed in my car but never Oh, wow. Legendary jazz artist Brown Squiggles being the latest example. That's quite a... I mean, I've laughed in my car, but never... It's never made my arms go... It must be cycling. Ah, okay.

Must be. That could probably be a few pounds. Yeah, but I've never laughed so much that I've tried to T-bone a fucking lorry in a car. Someday. I would like to submit my idea for a secret Bud fan greeting. Initiator, hey, are you having a bum bum day? High risk. Very high risk.

High risk. This is so hard. You could get put in jail. You can't say that you're having a bum bum day. Then what are you talking about? In a bar. And then continue the conversation as if that never happened. Are you having a bum bum day? Excuse me? Never mind. So what do you want to drink? Crazy weather. So, so initiate, initiator. Are you having a bum bum

day? Confirmed Bud fan. Bud fan. Yep. Totally bin bags. Both with finger guns. Keep on jacking it. It's a nice thought. It's nice. A lot of working parts everyone has to remember. We'd also like to add that episode 16 should be renamed as the Highbrow episode, given the lack of poo bum or wee. Oh really? Oh I'm so sorry, we hadn't noticed. Replaced by discussions around movies and commonwealth countries that use a single language gosh we should go back and edit in some

thoughts and stuff yeah just in the middle of talking come on man what is this only connect or something look forward look forward to

increased poo content in future episodes Koji keep on jacking in oh wow jack pretty good I was like

at first I was like isn't that the guy who stole all those kids? Koji 2012. Was it 2012? Kony. Fuck, I thought it was 2012, wasn't it?

Kony 2012. We're going to get him, they said. And they didn't. I think he's come up on this before, Kony. Yeah, this is a Kony-heavy podcast.

It's Farts, Poo, and Kony. That's how we sell out to people. Farts, Poo podcast it's Farts Poo and Coney that's how we sell it to people Farts Poo it's Farts meets Poo

meets Coney 2012 stop Coney I'm gonna have another beer do it age age takes time

and your age is now 18. You're 18 years old. My, my. Ain't you beautiful? So young, so pure, so tender, so legal. Age. You're finally of age. You're finally old enough to drink and vote and fuck. All at the same time, if you want it. If you don't mind getting banned from your bowling station, you could drink and fuck and vote for a counselor. Age.

You're finally old enough To drink lucky Kentucky bourbon So do We invite you to We'd like you to Let us in Let us in To your burgeoning adulthood Let us in

Unprotected Let us in unprotected. Let us in unequivocally. Let us into you and keep letting us in to your body for the rest of your life. Lucky Kentucky Bourbon Because sometimes Age Well It's all we have Well age And delicious

Kentucky Whiskey Phil's got himself another Cold one Sweet cold brewski These are those dangerous size of cans Phil's got himself another cold one. A sweet cold brewski. Ah. Ooh. And these are those dangerous size of cans that are like Coke can size.

Yeah. Where you go, this isn't a drink. Yeah. It is. They're only two thirds the size, which means I can have six times as many. Yeah. That's how, that's how. If only, I'll have three half pizzas, please. Yeah. Um, right. Yeah, that's how that's how funny I'll have three half pizzas, please Right hello p2p sharers nice

I've always wanted something like that about p2p and that's done just fine Thank you a genuine highlight of my week is waking to find a new bud pod waiting for my ears Oh, I have a couple of things. I'd like to mention new bud pod waiting for my ears thank you i have a couple of things i'd like to mention one just taking a dump in your bed a big poo made of chuckles and uh riffs uh one regarding sweet 16s etc is there a point at which being a sweet 26 not for any religious reason becomes so uncool that it's cool again or is it more like so innocent it's now perverted asking for a friend who is now nearly a sweet 27 wow interesting i think it becomes cool again innocent it's now perverted asking for a friend who is now nearly a sweet 27. Wow interesting. I think it becomes cool again

or it becomes cool in the way that it's impressive and you know what would make it more impressive if you clothed it in some sort of Buddhist thing let's be honest it depends very much on who this person is

yes that's true and how intentional very much on who this person is. Yes, that's true. And how intentional this is. If this is due to some adherence to a faith or a belief or a philosophy, I think that's pretty cool. He specifies not for religious reasons.

Not for religious reasons, but that implies that it is still by choice. Yes. Which i think is cool i think that's impressive it's certainly impressive self self-discipline becomes impressive post 20 21 where it's like wow you go to the gym or do your taxes that early or whatever you're sort of impressed by it yeah i think that's probably becomes cool again but it does depend so much on context it's quite hard to say you could

you don't have to say it's for religious reasons but you could be sort of really moral and philosophical about it I can't think of any moral philosophical argument that I would agree with I think you could argue they it I think you could

argue like they go oh I want it I want to use the novelty of the first experiences to shore up a relationship with someone who I'm already certain is the right one so they'll never be they're securing themselves against experiential

doubt maybe but those of us who have had sex by this point know that there is really nothing special about that first time. But sure, but maybe this is going to be one of those people who they never blacked out drinking booze as a teenager because they're like, yeah, I didn't need to drink that much. Right. So they'll be like, ooh, they already knew that.

You could dress it up like that. Right, but alcohol doesn't taste any better for your experience with it, really. Whereas sex is better for your experience. Yes, but it's like the Matrix. If you don't know that. Right. If you don't know any alternate realities. Eventually you will, because you eventually get better.

And then you look back and go, oh, why did I put it off that it off that long i suppose because it just meant it was bad when i was 27 instead of bad when i was 18 and very good by the time i was but then the other 18 year olds you're fucking at 18 are also bad yeah so you all get it out of the way together yeah but if if this person's 27 his partner might be better. Right, okay. Maybe that could do it. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. It's impressive. It is.

I'd say it's cool, mainly because of how rare it is. Rare things are cool. Yeah. That's how the economy works. It's also quite hipster. It is quite hipster. Isn't that pure in that way?

I only fuck tea. I only fuck oolong tea. Just in a mulch. Keeps my dick young. That's what you should say. So what is the question? Just that. That's number one.

Number two. Most cool uncool could be goths. Goths are cool as teenagers, but it takes so much time and effort to be a goth that it surely hovers just above the Louis line. Are teenagers, are goths ever cool? A teenage goth is cool. I think.

Oh, yeah, alright, alright. A really good goth. When you see one who's really gone for it, you're like, fair fucks. You've pierced your whole face. You've done it. You've got blue hair and you're just living like that.

They've really, like, you've got to invest has jack said that's cool uncool uncool cool most uncool cool so it's cool but it's right it takes so much effort yeah you've really got to like invest in your own appearance so much um coolest uncool so it's uncool but it's the coolest uncool would be esports so video games uh well like esports stars in korea and japan are actual superstars roaring crowds they make them super cool but they always have that rich yes but then they always have that attitude of yeah but it's just playing games from the rest of society i think that's true yeah yeah absolutely yeah it's still just like yeah you know i've got a i'm rich and i have this sports car it's like how'd you Starcraft so you're going to get that sports car bullied away from you I think

what's especially uncool for me what is fundamentally uncool about it is making money off someone else's creation you didn't make it

you just got very very good at this very specific thing which I guess is very similar to most other sports but at least something like

I don't know the skeleton in the Winter Olympics is so specific but it is not paid and dangerous it is not paid you don't become

famous or rich from it and you go yes good correct because that is too specific to get paid a lot of money for also a lot of sports physical sports

they make you more attractive the better you get at them because you're all muscly and fit so it's the opposite of video games yeah the better you get at video games the the blobby in my experience you become um my peak video game skill has coincided with blobbyness points in my life uh and then he basically just says thanks for all the great uh potting i hope this finds you jacking it

uh from scott and scott also says he found uh keanu reeves cyber uh very endearing oh great he says very beloved and endearing yeah they're calling it the uh reeves nissans you know yes yes he's everywhere now yeah um and he says he's an english as a second language teacher he says if you think that i'm not going to teach my students that that like a nazi without a spark plug is not a real expression you've got another thing coming

so hopefully a load of confused recent immigrants will be did we decide what the phrase meant like a Nazi without a spark plug

like you just couldn't get any you can't just do it you're just broken for the day right like a hangover like a Nazi

without a spark plug I like that it's good it's great so we'll get one from Elliot Hello British Petroleum BP Yes, very good

I love that sort of thing I'm a PhD student from the UK Currently doing research in the American Midwest Corn, guns, militia The Midwest I started listening to Budpod Whilst working in the archives. The archives.

I love that kind of thing. The archives. And have managed to work my way through every episode in just a few days. Wow. I broke out in unadulterated laughter during Phil's retelling of the I fucked a dog story, causing the archivist to ask me what I found so amusing about

American propaganda programs in Cold War Southeast Asia. All I could say was, okay, thank you. My most uncool cool thing is traveling for work. Sure, it sounds glamorous, but after two weeks of hotel living and eating out every night, there's nothing I want more than to return to my bum-bum life back home in Nottingham. That is very true. Well, we travel for work, and we know it's bum-bum. Yeah, yeah.

Travel lodges and stuff. Yeah, it has these very cool moments but overall it's lonely. Overall, oh no, sorry, also he says

I just wanted to flag up a couple of Japanese speakers that might support or distort your theory that white guys who speak Japanese are perverts. Oh yeah.

Jeremy Hunt. Possible PM because of his wife. Also possible. Jeremy Hunt. Possible PM. Because of his wife. No, no, his wife's Chinese. His wife's Chinese. The gaffe he made was in front of a room of Chinese people saying... So she's Japanese. Now my wife is Japanese.

Which is up there with the worst things you can say to a group of Chinese people after the casino's closing. the worst things you can say to a group of Chinese people after the casino's closing. Well, Phil, now that you've said that, I'm sure all the people who hated your white people Chernobyl dogs comment will be just as annoyed at your stereotyping of Chinese people. I'm sure they're very morally consistent.

Yes, yes, absolutely. They just hate racism of all kinds. They're just so keen for a world of tolerance. Jeremy Hunt, Steven Seagal. I mean, that's a perv. Steven Seagal is one of the pervious looking men in the world. I have to say, is it Steve? Scott.

This is Elliot. Elliot, fuck, we've moved on. I'd say Elliot, that I think you're proving my point with both of these men. He says support or distort. Oh, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. So Steven Seagal looks like a pervert that you've carved out of a big block of ham. Yeah, he doesn't look well.

Gary Lineker. He speaks Japanese. I know, yeah, apparently. No. Apparently. What's Japanese for crisps? I guess he must know. Crisp.

Crisp. Crisp. Crisp. crisps I guess he must know crispo crisporu crispo it wouldn't be far off I have to say it's got a or like is it one of those things like

when stuff is in German it's really long in a sense for like very thin finely sliced fried potato

fragments or whatever Japanese always go for the shorter they just go for the English that's true

don't they they're very efficient well it might be cheap it'll probably be cheaper because it probably will be the american version yeah yes yeah that must be yeah they definitely go for the american version above crisps yeah yeah uh gary i don't know maybe gary lineker is a perv hard to say i don't think he is i met him in in

real life and he's um actually a very magnetic man. Not to say he couldn't be a pervert, but I don't think he needs to be. And then Roy Hodgson, who I'm given to understand is a football man. Yeah, he's a football manager, isn't he? I think so. Sorry, Elliot, we're not those... These people speak Japanese. Apparently. I'm amazed.

I'm more suspicious that Roy Hodgson doesn't, but that's based on nothing. Because, Elliot, neither me nor Phil are ball men ah delicious just crunching the cans there crunch the can on our heads very slowly oh it hurts oh it's in my skin well there it is. Bud Pods, finally 18.

I hope you enjoyed your right to bear cans. Let us know what you drank along with this podcast. Let us know what you bore. A lot of people I know listen to this podcast in the morning, so these submissions could potentially be very depressing. Very depressing or just people pretending coffee is beer, I guess. Yeah, that's fine. That's fine.

It's still vaguely narcotic. That's true. It's still a drug. It's still a drug. And we want you to keep dreaming of a future where, of course, you have the right to bear cans at your desk. But don't try and initiate the revolution yourself on your own. It'll be like Tiananmen Square. You'll get wiped out.

And it'll have a strong visual impact for years. And we don't want to be seen as a violent movement. No, no, no, no. We need to win the hearts and minds and stomachs and livers of the people. Before we move in open space. Before we reveal ourselves. But thank you for joining us and here's

to the 21st episode where this podcast will finally be able to rent a large vehicle in continental Europe and drink in America of course because they're fucking backwards because they're insane you could buy a 2-2 hunting rifle at 12.

In fucking Alabama or whatever. You can't drink or get an abortion. Incredible. The two funnest things to do. I'm joking. They're going to Joe Brand you. They're going to cut off the I'm joking bit. They're going to Joe Brand me.

Joe Brand you hard. My fringe show could use the publicity. That's true. To be honest. And me and you are both doing the Edinburgh Fringe in about a month. Joe Brand you they're gonna cut off the I'm joking bit they're gonna Joe Brand me Joe Brand you hard my friend show could use the publicity that's true to be honest and me and you are both doing the Edinburgh Fringe

in about a month yes in a month if any of you all are at the Edinburgh Fringe in August please come to our shows both of our shows

you can do the one too what time are you? 7.15 I don't know if they can oh no they can't I'm at 8 o'clock but do come along to both

and say hi always happy to meet a pod bud um and keep jacking it and keep jacking it i suppose uh see you uh next time see you in a week bye