BudPod with Phil Wang & Pierre Novellie - Episode 182 - Skin In The Bin

Episode Date: September 28, 2022

The lads chat horse glue, austin powers, midgets and grandmas, pirate coins, fish sweat vs forever farts, Liz Truss immediately binning the economy, Iran and whoopee cushions Get bonus BudPod on Patreon! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

it's bud pod 182 182 um fun ape glue fun ape glue yeah yeah yeah uh when we run out of horses you know we're gonna start making glue out of the great apes and it'll be fun it'll be fun really like uh when we run out of horses yes yes yes yeah yeah yeah let's just say i'm planning something it's a big part of climate change horses hate hot hot horses yeah horses hate the heat um funny glue sounds like a ripoff of gorilla glue what is that that's very strong glue right yeah oh yeah so you'd be like oh i went to the off-brand b and q. P&Q. More polite. Come mind your P's and Q's at P&Q.

And they sell FunApe glue. Yeah. Toad tape. Yes. Nice. Well, Caledonian tape. Yeah. Caledonian tape. Yeah. Yeah. Caledonian tape.

That's good. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, fun ape glue. Stucky tape. Pierre and I are back from our travels. We aren't strictly allowed to say what we were filming, but we were filming something pretty fun. Was that as fun as ape glue? dare say it was yeah um it was good and it was um we were away for what 10 days

10 days traveling long time yeah long time spent yeah spent together but part on the road but part on the road um i think we'll actually i think we definitely infused the show with a bud pod vibe with a bud pod style definitely aesthetic and um tone for sure so yeah i'm really looking forward to coming out and being able to tell people what it is yeah it's going to be really cool um it'll whatever it is we can't tell you but it'll be out i'm guessing early in the first half of next year yeah early next year early next year i would have thought so we'll see um something that is out on the day you are listening to this is my richard herring leicester square theater podcast oh excellent i can't wait to listen to that so that's coming out today if you're listening on Wednesday

the... Oh no, hang on. My laptop just hasn't updated its clock. Why is that? Wednesday is the 28th. Wednesday is the 28th of September. For some reason my laptop is still on... It thinks it's the 15th.

That's worrying. Anyway. Oh well. That is worrying. Anyway. Oh, well. That is worrying because I go to my laptop to check if the data is correct on everything else. That's odd. That's extremely perverse. I don't like that at all. Anyway, I'll look into that in a second.

Wow, how odd. Yeah. Because there isn't even a time zone you could have accidentally set it to where it's the 15th. Just the past. It's just a version of time zone you could have accidentally set it to where it's the 15th. Just the past. It's just a version of time zone called the 15th of September. Yeah.

Oh, okay. Not even Hawaii is on the 15th. Very strange. But yes, my wretched herring is out, which sounds obscene. Yeah, your dick herring. My dick herring is out. Your little herring dick. My herring dick is out. Your little red herring is out my herring dick is out

your little red herring the red herring dick you're supposed to ignore it and yet there it is being all distracting yeah yeah yeah well that'd be good he asked me a question about milkshakes so I was very proud of my answer oh wow that's a teaser yeah and he does research

I mean like he was really he'd watched the sketch show, that I put on my YouTube. Oh, great. Yes. And he was nice about it, which is very... But I didn't think he'd go that deep. No, he does his due diligence. Yeah.

If you're listening and you haven't seen it, I did a sketch show with some very talented people. It's very funny. One sketch in particular makes me Makes me smile It makes me really laugh Yeah A type of dog A type of dog

Yes So if you're listening and you haven't watched it, give it a watch Give it a watch and then give yourselves a wash Speaking of watching, Pierre You know how I'm really bad At having seen movies that people in the middle have seen yes yeah you're not the worst but you're not true yes we know people who have seen nothing michael owen style michael owen's scene was it three movies seven

i think yeah but a lot of them are like factual based and right i think only two are like strictly fictional right like ghostbusters or something this I, for the first time in my life, watched Austin Powers. Really? I've never seen Austin Powers. Oh, that's incredible. I didn't even know that was missing from your oeuvre. I watched the first two Austin Powers this weekend.

Did you? Just on my own. What did you think? You know what? It mostly holds up. The first one holds up almost entirely, I think. Yeah. I watched it again the other Christmas sometime. I remember it was Christmas time time recently ish yeah and i thought i as i turned it on i

thought time to time to sort of look back in hindsight in a frowny way at this comedy i remember liking no there's even a rather astonishing bit where he refuses to have sex with a lady because he's too drunk yeah and i was like whoa what 1997 awesome powers yeah i was very impressed ahead of the game yeah yeah but um and there's a bit where he predicts 9-11 is there just him being ahead of the game um but i think mostly holds up i i think is mostly really funny i think the second one maybe i laughed at more gold member no the second one is Spy Who Shagged Me. That's right. Which a lot of really holds up.

I like how just unashamedly silly it is. Yeah. A lot of the jokes don't stick the landing, which is quite strange. A lot of scenes just kind of peter out. It looks like they just definitely improvised a lot of stuff and cut it down. They didn't always actually get to an out on the scene. Yeah, something where they thought, great, that's a button. a button yeah that's nice but i kind of added to the charm i like how they're characters who died in the first one and reappear in the second one and they just don't even care to explain why they're back yeah that's great i

really like that yeah um yeah the second one probably has a couple more objectionable bits i mean the mini me stuff is a bit like come on yeah that that's a very late 90s noughties thing it's dwarves and grandmas yes yeah put a dwarf or grandma in it and make them do something make them flip someone off put a dwarf or a grandma in rapping dressing like a rapper dwarves and white draw dwarves and grandmas behaving like Black rappers Yes Not like behaving like Not Mini-Me to appear like that in the music video

For Austin Powers looking like Eminem No Supposed to look like Yes Maybe 50 Cent Yeah but with the white shirt and stuff Right Iconic white shirt

And a hat Was 50 Cent the first guy to Yeah, but with the white shirt and stuff. Right. That's one of the iconic white shirt. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And hat, like kind of slightly square hat. Was 50 Cent the first guy to really popularize that kind of slightly square-topped baseball cap? I think just because he was such a square man himself, right? He's probably like a pixelated man. But before that, yeah, before that, it's all kind of LL Cool J kind of hand-unlocked,

did he, for a bit? Maybe. Maybe. Maybe. My hip-hop history, my Triple H, is not good enough. Not very good. I got a C in hip-hop history. See me after class, Professor Dre. I've still got Goldmember to watch,

but I gather that's the worst one. Yeah, there's still some funny bits, but it is very much it just being like, let's do this again, you know. Yeah. Very, very interesting do this again, you know. Yeah. Very, very interesting to see in the first one, a browned up Will Ferrell. Yes. And then in the second movie, he's slightly less browned up, but he's still browned up a little.

Is he? Yeah, because he plays a guy called Mustafa, right? That's right. With a fence. Generically sort of... Yeah, generically. He's got a Moroccan fez, but is he from Iran or whatever? Generically brown henchman.

Yes, yes, yes. I guess if... I remember when I watched Austin Powers like that. That was one of Will Ferrell's first big movie roles. It seems that way. So I had no idea who he was. And it was only re-watching it. I was like, oh yeah, was like oh yeah Will Ferrell

I get if I was Will Ferrell's PR and I'm not saying I'm not if I was Will Ferrell's PR and somehow someone on Twitter managed to rub two sticks together fast enough to create some fire about this you know

there's always some wizard out there who manages to like dream up this thing out of nowhere and people people really decided to care about mustafa and austin powers again and you know fine we can do an analysis if i was will ferrell's pr i would say well it's actually a clever reference to the crappy browning and yellowing up in the bond films right yes and and in that's right that's right that's right of which there was a quite a lot sure um so if i was that's that would be my angle and i'm hoping maybe that's true i want to do like a phd on who gets a free pass on these things and why you know i mean like no one i don't i've never heard anyone mention uh uh austin powers once in the like shall we take these things down for black facing or brown facing um and stuff from the 90s seems to slip through because i think because i think

stuff from the 90s is so recent that you don't get any cultural points of your gen z by like looking back at it and being like did you know about this i've seen this and also do you think just the 19 at the beginning sort of makes people go, that was a long time ago. Whereas something else, 2003 is like, come on, that was like five years ago.

Yeah. That was when I was a toddler, whatever says the, the more young kind of fire brand. Yes. Whereas like you can get a bit of credit by looking back at something unacceptable from the seventies. Cause the sevents is cooler.

Like, oh, I love 70s music or classic films. 90s is too recent for anything to become a classic film. Right. I see what you're saying. Maybe we're due a meteor shower of 90s retrospective cancellation. Also, 90s is cool now, isn't it? The 90s is cool now, fashion-wise. Gen Zers are into 90s stuff, so I suppose they don't want to tarnish their aesthetic

with recognition of the bad elements of the 90s. They've got curtains now on their hair, you know? Oh, yeah. Bowl curtains. Yeah. Very 90s, very NSYNC. Yeah, I wonder. I would like you to do that PhD

because it is interesting. There is some stuff where they just go, yeah, that's fine. Yeah. Yeah. But on the whole, pretty funny, pretty childish. It's interesting when you go and watch something for the first time that you know more from his references like fat bastard yeah

i was like so he's just a fat surely there's more to it he's kind of just be a fat scottish guy no no there's not there's nothing more to it there's imagine a fat scottish guy that's it and everyone's okay yeah yeah imagine a really fat scottish guy and that's it i quite like it as a sort of meta joke on how every character who pops up in the bond films the classic ones especially they they the thing is like size and nationality like like um jaws let's go he's got metal teeth and he's really big yeah he's tall he's the tallest man you've ever seen and everyone goes oh well like odd job they go he's little and he you've ever seen! And everyone goes, oh, odd job. They go, he's little, and he's Asian.

Yeah, there's an odd job, the character in the first Austin Powers, but he just throws a shoe instead. That's it, that's all they've changed about it. It's like, yeah, that's funny, that's funny. Yeah. Yeah, but a lot of the jokes in Austin Powers are like, imagine if the guy, instead of a hat, he threw a shoe, and then they go, yeah, that's funny, and then what else happens? And you go happens they go uh that's it it's kind of a really let's move on to the next

yeah um fun did you laugh at a million dollars a million dollars is really funny time travel kind of inflation inflation jokes very topical now that's true of course yes welcome to cheap pound welcome pound baby pound land is the cheapest it's ever been. If you want headphones that don't work, if you want unrecognizable, non-copyrighted, cartoon character-themed objects, if you want low-quality pencils, now's the time to go to Poundland and get them.

A pound is almost a dollar now them A pound is almost a dollar now A pound is almost a dollar We are almost on a par with our American cousins Thanks to Quasi And his crazy economics The British pound is still the most valuable currency in the world, right? I think the Swiss franc is very powerful. Really? I think so. So a Swiss franc is worth more than a British pound?

No, maybe that's wrong. Or maybe it's cost of living I'm thinking of. Like it's so expensive to live in Switzerland. That's a good question. That's a good question. What is the strongest currency? There's nothing in the world that has ever, in my experience, bought a lot of pounds. that's true gbp to swiss although cost of living transfer the aussies find the uk

quite cheap sometimes one pound is 1.07 swiss francs oh it's close so the dollar is stronger than the franc. The Swiss franc. Via the pound. Via the pound. For now. But I mean, the dollar's never been stronger than the pound, but it might happen.

It might happen. That's crackers. What does that mean? This is what I don't really understand about the strength of... I almost think of it in terms of that uh the meme of the universe brain you know the increasingly complex brains and mine goes like the dumb brain goes a weak pound is good then the smart brain goes the strong pound is good and then the universe brain goes no weak pound is actually good yeah that's i can't tell i can't tell what's good it just loops yeah i i yeah it's like a weak pound

means more more work for you're able to sell more out of the uk because it's cheaper but then your money's worth less i mean is that literally it a weak pound is good for exports yeah obviously however we don't export a lot except certainly not physically except services and that's no use because they're they're paying us here ah right we're paying more for stuff that's coming in yeah right because even even the services in the uk are employed by the uk branches of international companies so it's not like being paid in dollars and that's good yeah yeah and we're buying stuff that we often import and i i had all like pretty much the entire energy market is in dollars so then that just means

that energy is even more expensive now because it's a bad exchange but also it's mainly that the US dollar is doing really well more than more than the pound

is weak the US dollar is really strong yeah Biden is doing so well at reducing inflation in America he's reducing it by like a percentage point a month

or something or he did at some point like he's doing well or his administration that's why he's so sleepy at some point. Like he's doing well. Or his administration. That's why he's so sleepy. Or his administration. He's knackered from reducing inflation. Or his administration's doing well

and he's like a mad old king. Yeah. Who's just sort of, what? Like just kind of gives instructions and stuff happens, which is fine. I do not mind that. If you go,

we've got a very sleepy king, but before he got sleepy, he appointed a lot of geniuses to do everything. Great. Good. Lovely. Good sleepy king. Have before he got sleepy, he appointed a lot of geniuses to do everything. Yeah. Great. Good. Lovely.

Good sleepy king. Have a sleepy version. You've deserved your sleep. Yeah. Have a nap. Have a kip. Have a kip. Sleep, your majesty.

You have labored long enough. Like, it's like a version of Jafar, if Jafar was just really good modernizing influence on the kingdom of Agrabah. Yeah. Or would that be a good funny Disney reveal where it's like Jafar was like a sort of modernist trying to open up

the country to investment and things. Jasmine's father was this absolutely traditional tyrant, sort of xenophobic. But a lot of the American success has to do with like they have their own gas really they have their own energy right well they've got this amazing i they've they've got this like proper like bullying position because they hit a fracking right and the second the price

of oil goes high enough that or gas goes high enough that it makes their fracking worthwhile they just turn on all the fracking and then second then it releases loads into the market and then the price goes down again they go and they turn off the fracking yeah they've got like control of the valve basically right yeah with the power of fracking king king and not caring if your citizens have drinkable water yeah yeah yeah they're trade-offs sure oh yeah but not globally for us no um it's just if you live in Flint or wherever and they can't drink the tap water.

Is that because of fracking? I think so. I think so. But with America, who knows? It's chaos over there. Mm-hmm. Every other week I seem to see something

on Twitter from America about some sheriff standing in front of a committee of people with a glass of tap water daring them to drink it. Yeah. I see that hundreds of... It seems to be happening constantly. Yeah. Very apocalyptic.

And we can at least drink our tap water. For now. For now. Liz Truss. Very... Laughing a lot today, reading about people already submitting letters of no confidence. Really? Already? According to a minister who... According to a Tory MP who was a minister under Boris

He and others are already like She's going to destroy the fucking economy And it's like Liz Truss and Kwasi Kwarteng Are arguing directly with the Bank of England And a lot of their policies Aren't even particularly Tory policies We're going to have another new Prime Minister next year aren't we I mean

Surely Surely we're going to have another new Prime Minister And that is a disgrace it's a disgrace it's a disgrace she's got such

a weird voice I love Matthew Parris' column about this trust that everyone was sharing where he was just like she's insane her brain is empty

I love Matthew Parris he really didn't give a fuck he doesn't give a fuck he's great. Sitting on his llama farm. He's got that real South African sort of directness. Zimbabwean. Is he?

I thought he was South African. No, Zimbabwean originally. But like British Zimbabwean. Like expat kid, I think. No, actually, I don't know. I don't know. Yeah. Although he wrote column after column saying,

you mark my words, the Tory party is far too clever to ever let Boris be in charge. Every week, another edition. Well, it looks like it's going a bit better for Boris. But you wait and see. Someone's gonna... And then it's just like,

wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong. Yeah, yeah. I'm just wishful thinking all the way to the grave. Yeah. Ugh. But Liz Truss is baffling and stupid, and seems to be destroying the economy, which is in a nihilistic way quite funny. It is funny. I mean, it's sort of we're all going to suffer for

it. I mean, this brand new. We're in this perennial sort of dance of well, hope being shit makes things better for labor come next general election but worse for me living in the UK now so what do I want yeah yeah well she's gone to war with

basically anyone with a mortgage yes if everything she's doing is you know the interest rates and so on someone was saying like monthly repayment saying yearly repayments on a mortgage would go from a certain band of mortgage payers would go from like seven grand a year to like 15.

Great. And everyone would just lose their houses. I mean, she's really, really like day one, she's walked in through the door. She's like that teacher. She's walked into the treasury and she's gone, everyone show me all your fiscal plans and they all hold them up and she's like now put them in the trash and stand on your desk like she's done that to the whole government

forget everything you know about being a civil servant we're changing things around here yeah yeah i can't see her staying prime minister for much for like not even until the next general election surely not it's it's a it's what happens when the person who chooses the prime minister is the people who choose the prime minister i should say are just like the tory party and not the public and it's always like the most mental yeah the most mental version yeah ones of those the most mental version of the kind of person who can be bothered to join the conservative party and keep up to date with their emails regarding it yeah so like we're already in dedicated weirdo territory yeah yes and then they go who's the nuttiest of all of you? Yeah. Who's the most intense person at Warhammer Club?

They get to choose. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Yeah, so that's interesting and good for anyone who holds, I don't know. Who has money. Who has Swiss francs or Zimbabwean dollars at this point. Yeah. What, if you could change the name of the currency?

Of British pound? Yeah. Britcoin. Britcoin. Yeah. Very nice. Didn't Rishi Sunak say he wanted to do that? I think there was an idea floated of a British cryptocurrency,

and it was called Britcoin. But I tweeted either before that or not having heard of it that I wanted to call the pound Britcoin. But yeah, that's my vote. It's for Britcoin. That's good. Three Britcoins for, you know. Three Britcoins for a dollar.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's the entire nation getting its groceries on the dark web. Britcoin, yeah. I'd want to go for like Florins Like one of those medieval total war currencies Or back to lira, from where the pound sign is from Let's call it lira Ooh, florins, lira

Uh, uh Just call everything shillings That would get voted through by the current government Yeah, doubloons. Doubloons. Let's call them doubloons again. Doubloons. Let's make economic freefall fun.

Let's all pretend to be, like, Jacob Rees-Mogg's always going on about the buccaneering spirit of the city of London. Yes, exactly. Let's go for it. Doubloons. Let's commit. Pieces of eight.

Yeah? Yeah. What's the Spanish one? Is it doubloons? I don't think it... It doesn't sound very Spanish. The one that's on the treasure galleons. Yes.

That's going to bug me. Spanish caplena. I'm going to Google... Caplona. Caplona. Caplona. I'm going to Google Spanish I'm googling Spanish pirate coin

You are not connected to the internet That's what it's called That's why the date's fucked God's sake Why am I not connected Nothing works I've heard this so many times God's sake Why am I not connected? Nothing works I've heard this so many times I do not have connection

Treasure chests full of Blahs Francis Drake stole so many Spanish pirate coin From the Spanish Fuck Pirate coin It seems to be doubloon

Was it? Apparently You better not be lying to me, Philip I swear there's something that I'm not thinking of that is the one. I'm on a site called Pirate Money. Reals?

No, no. Escudos? And eight escudos is a doubloon. So Reals and Escudos are the Spanish ones, apparently. Oh, Pirate Money. is this all we've been reduced to yeah let's talk about pirate money oh it can't be right

it seems to be reals real Real seems to be the base. The base unit. It's reals. Which just means royals, doesn't it? I guess so. Doblon, Dobloon, Duros. Oh. This isn't what I wanted at all.

No, because I'm thinking of a different word, uh pirate money pirate money baby dirhams dinars these are middle eastern now yes yes i like saying did him though did him did him did him did him hey how cool is the stuff and well it's not cool but how interesting is the stuff happening in iran right now the the riots and did you see the iranian government are deploying female riot police Hey, how cool is this stuff? Well, not cool, but how interesting is this stuff happening in Iran right now? The riots, do you see the Iranian government are deploying female riot police? Oh, really? Because they go like, you don't want people hitting women? Well, guess what?

We've got a lot of maniacs who are women. What are you going to do now? Checkmate. Checkmate. Sheikh Matt, which of course is from Persia. Of course, yes. If anyone's going to say checkmate, it's going to be them. It's always so interesting, the events, the straws that break the camel's back. The events that really push a population over into boiling over.

It's hard to tell sometimes, isn't it? Yeah, it's hard to tell what it is. You would never have thought the Arab Spring would have been kicked off by a Tunisian tomato market stall salesman guy trying to set himself on fire. Huh? Yeah. There was a start of the Arab Spring would have been kicked off by a Tunisian tomato market stall salesman guy trying to set himself on fire. Huh? Yeah. That was the start of Arab Spring. Really?

Yeah, he set himself on fire in a protest. Oh. But he was like a guy who worked in a market. And just that was enough. That happened to be the thing. Yeah. I think it's like what they call in business a black swan. It's this thing that becomes huge and you could never have predicted it.

It's a spooky, sexy film. Black swan. Black swan. Yeah, that is a spooky, sexy film. Yes, a sort of unpredictable once-in-a-lifetime event. Yeah. Although, to be fair, I mean, the UK especially is pretty, I'd say, balls deep into once-in-a-lifetime events in the last five years. I'm getting pretty sick of these once-in-a- these once in a lifetime events Phil I really wish they'd stop happening

enough for a hundred lifetimes but yeah I mean these these protests in Iran now they're like led by women but then like supported by men which is really cool to see the men are following behind the ladies and who are burning the hijabs and stuff i wonder if i really hope something comes of it obviously great i don't see yeah i mean i mean like it's i think it's a naive person who celebrates a revolution and uh of any kind but especially in that part of the world but i mean as the revolution is being driven by it is you know an opposition to uh fundamentalist autocracy. You've got to be pretty pro, at least in a cautious way. Yes. Yeah, I'm totally pro,

but I mean, what the result will be in the end, who knows? Who knows? It can make these things worse. I mean, there was so much optimism about the Arab Spring and it kind of came to nothing really yeah or just chaos and i mean yeah or just it's the power vacuums that's a dangerous thing like the muslim brotherhood in um in egypt right who do you use arab spring to um to consolidate the

power that's what happened right yes at least initially that was part of it but the um um that's what that's the name of the group isn't it yeah the usual um autocratic dictator fascist regime apologists of course are just going oh it's all the cia funded oh yeah yeah yeah the cia do everything and it's all fake and yeah yeah yeah these these these people can't be thinking of for themselves or protesting everything and it's all fake. Yeah, yeah, yeah. These people can't be thinking for themselves or protesting for themselves. It's because they're American stooges, blah, blah, blah. Yes, yeah.

It's very patronizing. It's very patronizing. That if something monumentous happens, the US has to be behind in some way. Yeah, in a way, they are the most patriotic people. Conspiracy theorists, I always think, they are the most patriotic people. Conspiracy theorists, I always think, are often the most patriotic people

because they go, well, nothing could happen without my government say so. It's like, really? Even if I disagree with it. Everything has to be centered around me and my life experience. Yeah, exactly.

I'm still trying to figure out this coin thing. It's going to bug me. This is the B story to this episode. Yeah, just me privately worrying about coins for the rest of the day. Yeah, just me privately worrying about coins For the rest of the day Honey, are you okay?

You haven't touched your coins I think it is Rial's I don't know You can't see me now listeners But I'm looking He's looking out the window like he's waiting For his war bride to return Galleons?

That's Harry Potter. It's not okay. Galleons. Isn't the galleon the type of ship? It is, yeah. But in the Harry Potter books, the gold coins are golden galleons. Oh, I see. Yeah, it's cool.

I hope something happens with it. But not something insanely dangerous. I... Oh, God, I don't know. I mean, it does feel like a sort of new age of mad chaos. And I know everyone thinks that, but I don't know. The Cold War was so stable. Yeah, but we are also now constantly aware of every single thing that happens.

Yeah, we can literally watch a person's eye view, a POV of a riot. Yeah. Yeah, that's true. That's true. Oh, God, excuse me. Are you farting or is that the leather sofa? It is the couch, yeah. Okay.

I'm sitting on a leather sofa. Phil's casting me for something after this. He won't say what. Yeah. I'm doing sort of elbow farts on this on this arm of this chair if on this podcast this is the one podcast

where if it was farts we'd have to be we'd be delighted we'd finally be able to relate to our listeners there's a funny moment when you make a fart noise on some furniture

and then you have to prove that it wasn't a fart by replicating noise, but you can't You just can't do it, you've got suddenly the leather sofa arm is the smoothest I swear, I Oh god And then you start farting out of nerves

And you're your own worst enemy, I swear No, that was real Yeah, but that's, yeah I don't know why that's not a big story right now is what's happening in Iran I guess because there's just so much shit going on here I guess it's because you know if on your first day

like Mr Bean style you walk into the economy and just like go and just like tip over the table everyone's gonna go oh my god I mean because if anything happens to the the iranian uh if that shifts at all the iranian power or government shifts at all that's it's huge i mean that's massive yeah yeah i mean they're the ones giving the russians all their drones

oh really yeah yeah the russians can't make their own drones now basically so they gave them 300 of their drones, and they're pretty fancy. Like military grade drones? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Not like, yeah, not hobbyist. Really good, well, like proportionally pretty good drones. So that would be nice for that to stop. Here we go. Okay. I can't tell what's fart and what's couch at this point.

That's a sentence from Boxing Day. When you're sitting around on Boxing Day going like, fart, couch, it's all one thing now. Have you ever sat on a whoopee cushion? Yes. I don't know if I've ever sat on one in the intended context of not noticing it was there.

Maybe. Maybe like once in my life and I've never been fooled again. That's what that song is by The Who. Won't get fooled again. It's about whoopee cushions. Yeah. That's why the name of the band

is actually The Whoopee Cushions. But they cut it. They fucked up the text size when they submitted the image. It's supposed to be The Whoopee Cushion. You know what? Yeah. No, I just always like it as a prank because you could just be like

well obviously that was this device I've just unearthed from under my chair yeah and I never at one point thought it was me because I would have felt the fart coming out

of my asshole that's a good tactic actually to always have whoopee cushion in your back pocket so if you ever do actually fart

you can oh and you just pull out your back pocket and go, who did this? Come on. Who filled it with shit as well so it smells? Come on, who filled this with wet shit and put it on my seat? Come on.

I'm not mad. I'm not mad. It's funny. It's funny. Who filled my pants with shit? The shit. Pulling out lumps of shit from your pants. Who did this?

Who did this? Come on. I can take a joke. I can take a joke. Waving a fistful of poo. I can take a joke. It's funny. It keeps happening.

Who put it? Take out a big knife. Who put this in my bloodstained knife who put this in my pocket come on big bag of cocaine oh come on guys that's how you confess everything via prank yeah that's a good tactic yeah Until they confront you about the smell. You go, I guess it's realistic. They've upgraded them. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It's 2022. 4D whoopee cushions have added this. Smell-O-Cushion. Smell-O-Vision has come to the whoopee cushion industry. Are you prepared? Yeah, you're prepared for this new world. Whoopee cushion smell of farts now, and no one is talking about it. Pray for this new world.

Whoopie cushions smell of farts now and no one is talking about it. It's time to talk about how whoopie cushions don't smell. Guardian long read. I'm waiting for the Guardian piece about how whoopie cushions are fart shaming. Yes. I'm waiting on that. Yes.

Yes. Lifelong, lifelong, lifelong, what's the word? For when I get waiting on that. Yes. Lifelong, what's the word for when a disease is constant? Chronic. Yeah, chronic flatulence is a lifelong debilitating condition. Yeah. Enough, say the farters.

Farters for justice. Farters for justice. Fart is for justice. Fart is for justice. Dress as a superhero and climb a thing farting the whole time. Each time they try and put a leg up to climb Big Ben. Fart is for justice is great. Yeah, that's got to be happening at some point. Because i guess look to be you know who i feel the most sorry for in terms of those like weird little smell conditions

it's those people who like their armpits just are like awful right right you know this is a real thing that's real just naturally smellier than other people yeah but like it's to the point where it's like it's unwashable off like they can't get rid of it it's something to do with like the chemicals in their sweat of like it's what's being produced naturally by their sweat glands right forever that's it like rotten fish or something yeah so really i always just think that's what the fuck do you do you can't like get them all surgically removed it actually does sound like one of richard herring's sort of hypothetical questions yes yeah yeah would you rather smell like fish every time you sweated

Or have a fist come out of your bum Or constant farting Would you rather smell like fish when you sweat really really badly Like even a little bit of sweat Are you asking me now? Or you have to fart so much all the time, but it doesn't smell. Oh, but is it audible?

Well, it's just so much that like, even if you're sneaking them. Right, it's just constant. Eventually, it's just so much. I think I take the smelling like fish when I sweat. Really? Yeah, because it's like, at least it's in the context of sweating

where people aren't expecting you to smell great. I just smell particularly bad. Also, I don't sweat very often. But what about like the tube on a hot day, like not exercise, you know? People aren't going to be able to pick out who's the one who smells like fish on the tube. Sexy times? Just keep the room real cold. Real?

Call me the snowman. Yeah, sexy times is bad. Sexy times is bad. But then equally in sexy times, she's like, just constant, but no smell. Just these disturbing noises.

Especially considering, you know, that during sexy times, the relevant parts don't smell their best anyway. They're not. To add. They're not wearing their Sunday best.

No. To add a fish, fishy, fishy smell to them. And I mean, I don't mean like fresh fish like you go oh this market is uh thriving yeah like really like end of the day it's like someone cooked fish in this house and it's in the bin come on that made me that's gross that made me feel you know what the word my for me is when someone's cooked salmon. You know I hate cooked salmon. Someone's cooked salmon and they put the skin in the bin

and now the kitchen smells like cooked salmon. The worst food in the world. That is the worst smell, though. Bin salmon. It's bad enough when you're meant to eat it, the smell of cooked salmon. Put the skin in the bin. I eat cooked salmon so much. I otherwise eat like a fucking goat.

But I think I've consolidated all... in the bin i hate cooked salmon so much i otherwise eat like a fucking goat but cook but i think i've consolidated all everyone else's sort of normal amount of picky eating yeah i've consolidated it just into cooked salmon which i hate more than anything it's like kryptonite you're like superman you have you you're food immune to everything but this one like element yes and it's cooked salmon. Lex Luthor just you know hurling salmon on crouton you while you

eat chicken's feet and pig head. And cockroaches I'd rather You literally have eaten cockroaches and you don't like cooked salmon. Yeah. What a slam. What a slam. I really enjoy what you were saying before. You put the skin in the bin.

Put the skin in the bin. The skin in the bin. That's when you have to really commit to an effort. Come on, put some skin in the bin. Put your skin in the bin. Or if it's like skin in the game, but you don't have any skin in the game anymore. Oh, yeah.

You'd be like, I used to have skin in the game. Now it's skin in the bin. I had skin in the game, but I binned it. I binned it. I binned that skin. Don't trust him. He's got skin in the game anymore? You'd be like, I used to have skin in the game. Now it's skin in the bin. I had skin in the game, but I binned it. I binned that skin. Don't trust him. He's got skin in the bin. Of course he wants you to gamble. His skin's in the bin. He's out of the game.

Given that discussion now about skin in the bin, what would you choose? I think I have to go for the the the occasional curse which is the smelling terrible when i sweat as opposed to just farting all that needing to fart all the time let's say let's say by all the time we mean like you have to do a fart every five minutes it's just such it's just such social anathema to be heard farting even though it doesn't smell How much do you trust yourself to be able to

screw a silencer onto your pistol every time Then I don't want to be the guy who's always leaning to his side Phil, you're very cool now I just like leaning. I just like leaning from time to time.

Just lifting my right leg up. Have you guys noticed that Phil always sits like basic instinct now? He's always got one knee, leg crossed over the other, smushing his bollocks. You guys notice that? No, not really. Well, I have.

I wonder what made him do that have you noticed that phil's always putting his leg up on stuff in an inspiring sort of school teacher sort of way like up on a chair and leaning and yeah which would you pick definitely the farting one really i'm a sweaty i'm a sweaty sweaty suave yeah and your stand-up shows would be intolerable to all but the most dedicated seafood fans yeah all those with synesthesia of some kind yes the smell of fish made them laugh yes yes that'd be good uh yeah definitely the i i also just think like it's such a being like smelly being smelly is being smelly is such social anathema as well i remember whereas you could

almost you could if you if you really marketed it right your constant boisterous farting but without the smell could be marketed as like hangover free alcohol all the all the fun and no no i remember my my boarding school um brunei there was a new girl she joined and she was beautiful and i was like wow what a beautiful gal and then got around that she smelled quite bad yeah and it just canceled out all the everything all the beauty it doesn't matter it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. If you smell bad, it's over. It's powerful. It's crazy. If you smell a bit like bum, forget it.

It almost makes it worse. Yeah, because we incorrectly associate beauty with virtue and... And cleanliness, I guess. And purity and pleasant things. Yeah. Which is obviously not necessarily true at all. Yeah. Very medieval way of thinking.

So it's more like, you're not supposed to smell. Yeah. If you do smell, you're supposed to smell of lavender. Yeah. And rosewood. Like the angels. But instead… Smelly pits

Poor gal Was it sweaty smell Or was she Oh I don't remember Did they not specify This when she smells She smells yeah And you just took off your gloves

And threw them onto the ground Just like a funk A funk Just a funk That's so bad A funk You know Apparently funk music

Is named after funk Which is the smell After sex Get off Get off Get off that fact podium Yeah Really? This is what I've heard

It might be completely wrong Let's see Origin of funk Good lord Word name Origin of name funk Is there any other music like that? The ancient and distinguished surname funk Name. Name. Origin of name, funk. Is there any other music like that?

The ancient and distinguished surname, funk, is of German origin. Oh. Okay, that's different. Ancient and distinguished? Chill out, mate. If your name is Carl Funk, I'm laughing at you. How did funk music get its name? Here we go, here we go. All right, moment of truth.

Is it to do with banging? According to one source, New Orleans-born drummer Earl Palmer was the first to use the word funky to explain to other musicians that their music should be made more syncopated. Oh, fuck it. Maybe I was wrong then. But where did he get it from? That's true.

Did Earl Palmer have a particularly stinky dick and balls? Is that why we're grooving so hard now, thanks to Earl Palmer's D&Bs? I'm not getting... You know, it's one of those things you look up and there's so many theories. I don't know. I don't know which one's which.

I like that one. I like that one. I want to stick to the sex one. Yeah. I like... Because it does sound like a stank the it sounds like smelly well it's porn music yeah we associate it so heavily with pornography yeah in a sort of stereotypical vhs sort of way funky i like it is there any other music jazz jizz that's pretty close jizz music yeah um disco not really dick dick dick so dick so dick so dick so punk so close to funk

yes true can you get funk punk sounds like puke punk yeah pop the knob in pop sounds sounds sounds like a fart pop that's sexy yeah a plumber once a plumber once referred to shitting to me as you have a pop you have a pop you have a pop he is like he came to the bathroom and like he's showing me opening the windows like so you know you have a pop and you open the window yeah yeah where was he from he's english really yeah you have a pop yeah yeah it's all like cockney sounding young young young guy quite handsome if i remember correctly but he was quite you have a pop. Having a pop, I've always thought of it

as having a go. Yes, that's right. Maybe having a pop, having a go at your bum. You're having a go at the toilet. Hey, come on. Yeah, you're having a go at the toilet. You're shitting right on it.

Hey, come on, you piece of shit toilet. Hey, fuck you. I'm not having a pop at you. Check this out. Take that. And that. Hi-ya.

Hi-ya. I've only ever heard pops in the context of turds from Joe Cornish. Oh, yeah. Making some joke that's lodged in my memory in the way that these things do for me. About how some pop star who'd made some enormous amount of money on some deal. Yeah. And they said, that's enough money that you can buy a machine that gold plates your pops before they hit the water as they come out of your ass yeah and i thought that's a very funny way of describing

some decadence just immediately gold plating all your pops um but uh listeners we've recovered from filming phil and I, just about. Yes, thank you for surviving our hiatus. Yeah, and for your patience. We're very excited for you to see what we've been up to. We think you'll really, really like it. And we may have some other exciting news soon enough. Oh, just keep your ears peeled.

Peel those ears. Peel them good. Peel them back. Peel them off. Peel them right off so you can't not hear on news Don't put your skin in the bin Put it in the game Put it in the game, leave it out of the bin Peel those ears

But for now Phil and I are going to the Winnebago trailer That is the VIP Patreon Podcast That's right, if you're not on the patreon do sign up we have extra spicy chats on there we have premium correspondence we've got some real good stuff there actually yeah highly recommend big fan of that big fan of the patreon episodes and the base the base offer is just you slide us some cash across the table. You get an extra slice of Bud Pod pie.

Yeah, and a couple of bits of goodies. A couple of... Little chunks. You get merchandise. Merch, merch. You get stickers. You get a little postcard. I think you get a t-shirt. Yeah.

I'd have to check. My brain is still frazzled. I still haven't recovered from what we were up to. Oh, also, a shout out to a Pod Bud. Alex. Alex makes some, Alex makes really excellent Simpsons art. Oh yes.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Really fantastic. And I bought, I bought, I bought her piece of mill house. She's Alex May Hughes on Instagram and she's got some really cool simpsons art like gold-plated simpsons art and i bought one that says everything's everything's coming up millhouse and it's got millhouse in the middle going yeah this is great it's great it's really

nice uh stuff very cool yeah um and listen to my richard herring less square theater podcast please i want him i want him to be like, wow, look at these numbers. These are Bud Pod numbers. That's what I want. That's my dream. Yes, yes, yes, yes. Pollinate those crosses. Okay.

See you next week, guys. Thanks for bearing with us. See ya. Bye-bye. Bye.