BudPod with Phil Wang & Pierre Novellie - Episode 259 - Three Buddy Podlem

Episode Date: March 27, 2024

The lads discuss fat, Wang's latest appearances on the silver screen, peasants, cameos, Microsoft's top bunk bullying, we hear from Ben and his tat, including eugenics magnets Get bonus BudPod on Patreon! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

it's bud part 259 259 you drive fine you drive fine you drive fine that's what they say at the end of a driving exam if you passed they just go on their little checklist and they look at you and go you drive fine congratulations has there ever been an exam so soon forgotten than a driving exam um i would say most of my engineering exams university yeah i i yeah i i've i've good cram brain i can cram pretty well what about um has there ever been once the exam's done it just flies out oh sure but has there ever been an exam so soon forgotten despite you immediately using the thing the exam's done it just flies out oh sure but has there ever been an exam so soon forgotten despite you immediately using the thing the exam was for all the time yeah um like in driving i think i actually for for ages um i was told that i drove like i was still taking the exam

yeah my girlfriend said that i drive like i'm still taking the exam and it's true i do like my hands always ten and two i'm i'm always both hands on the wheel always checking the mirrors before every turn yeah i i i do drive still very very safely very exam like but that's because i my brain is such that i go this is how i was told to do it this is how i was told to do it there must be a reason i was examined on on on these techniques so i keep doing it these are the optimum methods yeah apparently what i have forgotten is the parallel parking advice they give you like where you'd reverse up to where at which point you turn and then which point you turn next i've forgotten that that i've had to sort of relearn by instinct yeah you've got to you've got to get your back

rear left light aligned with the back rear right light of the car behind you like there's a whole right yeah that's it that's it and then you turn and then you reverse until your front left light is aligned with their back right light and then you turn the other way yeah that sounds right that sounds right is that right please please um oh no it must be your back left um uh wheel is aligned with their back left wheel and then you turn i don't know um apologies to anyone who can hear any gurgling I'm having a good time That's not it It's because the dishwasher is making sounds

I was about to say the dishwasher is on For some reason but that would be a lie I know why it's on It's on so that it can wash some dishes The dishwasher is on for some reason I don't know what's going on In this crazy house I didn't put it on

But it was on i love okay how annoyed would you be pierre you the the dishwasher is giggling giggling giggling the giggling throughout these records giggling giggling giggling we finished and you get up and the dishwasher goes it's finished and you go over and you open it and there's one single bowl like in the middle just a single white bowl and it's also it's it's stacked still in such a way that there's water in the bowls like yeah yeah it's facing upwards i'd be pretty fucking annoyed i'd be pretty fucking annoyed if it was for one and it ends exactly as we're finishing yeah exactly i really like the sound of a dishwasher going it makes me feel good the idea of something being cleaned by a machine yeah the corner is very pleasant to me

yes it does seem magical and and it's like a nice humming sound um uh does yours beep when it's done mine burps itself open oh you've got one of those mine goes no mine's it's all right that it doesn't it doesn't it doesn't belch it doesn't mine goes and all the steam comes out its mouth bar come and see what i have done cleansed that's what mine says yummy i wish it was eating the i guess drinking oh the dishwasher filter is there a more disgusting object in the in the home dishwasher filter i yeah i rarely look look in that thing i very rarely look oh it's not nice i'll take the uh the washing machine's lint filter any day lovely dry fluffy yeah the washing

machine's lint filter is like oh it's a mess but it's made of cuddly warm little creatures it's like the nicest mess that's gonna be the title of my movie the nicest mess the nicest mess yeah what's the nicest mess definitely the lovely soft fuzzy warm drink lint drawer that is a nice mess what what else is a nice mess i like i like putting a whole thunking thing of paper into the recycling just yes sorry and also i have to apologize a guy on a fucking motorbike for no reason just drove down my road turned around drive away again cheers cheers hell's angel god's sake i i know what you mean it's almost worth buying and immediately binning a full a full you know like packet of a4 just for that massive brick sound donk yeah yeah putting putting in like yeah tin can into the recycling feels good that's good tin can

shredding stuff is very satisfying shredding is satisfying oh i love cutting an old credit card into the bin like uh someone starting a new life in a film that That's it. Well, whenever you get a new credit card, you're meant to slice up the old one into the bin. Yeah. And I slice the best bit is you get the scissors and you cut through the gold chip. And you can feel the change in consistency

from the plastic card into the metal, the thin metal chip and then back into the plastic card. Oh, yes. I'm getting shivers about it right now. That's a lovely mess. That's a nice mess. Old credit card. Yeah.

Chopping up old credit cards. It feels like you're starting a new identity. It does. Yeah. I feel like I'm going, goodbye, old Phil. Goodbye, Phil that expired in 2023. Say hello to Phil who expires in 2032. That's the unpleasant side effect of expiry dates on credit cards.

It makes me go, oh, by the time I get another credit card, I'm going to be 20 30 29 39 oh yeah the passage of time fuck yeah next time i have a new credit card i'm going to be knocking on the door of 40. how do you feel about the idea of turning 40 that this early stage you're far from it i suppose yeah yeah yeah um i i i think i think i'm much better prepared than most because i age i'm aging well because of my genes yeah and my skin routine my skincare routine yes i'm. And I've got very good genes for hair. Crucially, I've excellent genes for hair. I've got color.

I've got volume. You're like a good TV. Yeah. And I'm working out. I'm looking pretty stacked these days, you know, Pierre. I go to the gym and get my pump on. I look at myself in the mirror. I'm like, wow, my body is the shape of a man's at last it's taken 34 years

but i finally got man-shaped body i i feel decent about going 40 but it's still not okay i've collapsed into fat decadence over the last week really but you But you're like, you're like Hench Strongman. Yeah, but now I'm looking more like a guy who is strong, but who is also fat. Yeah. Well, that's because, well, he's been on tour. Guy who's strong in Game of Thrones.

Yes. Yeah, the mountain. Yeah. You're heading towards the mountain. Yeah, where it's like, well, he's obviously strong, but there's like, there's no real definition on him.

Apart from his titties. I'm scared of him, but only because he's demonstrated his strength with a feat. Upon just looking at him, I wasn't scared of him. He had to do something. Yeah, I was scared of his bigness, but I wasn't sure if that meant strongness, because I've been trained to think of strongness as looking like Arnold Schwarzenegger.

That's right. That's right. But you look at world's strongest men and they're always round fellas. Yeah, they've got a good inch or two sheet of fat over their massive muscles. Yeah, really, really. As if it is to stabilize them or something. It's like armor yeah they very

rarely have any kind of shred going on I told you about the the armor of Henry VIII I saw in the Metropolitan Museum in New York right they have one of the Henry VIII Henry VIII's final battle armor

oh it's like big fat armor yeah it's fucking scary his nutty professor armor yeah it is but it's not goofy looking it's really intimidating he's really tall it's really big and it's black and it's like woof it's like something out of Game of Thrones

it's really intimidating I uh yeah imagine if you just if you were a fucking peasant and like we've talked about this before i think with like churches or like any sort of stone building like you've only ever seen huts and stuff but equally with like clothes you've only you've only ever really seen a pretty limited range of colors you know green kind of rusty brownish reddish color maybe some yellows probably not blue outside of maybe a couple of fancy ladies who you've seen ride past on horses or something and like in terms of weaponry it's just like i have a spear and a and a round bit of like leather

that is kind of a shield a bit and then you just see a guy who's basically the t1000 from fucking terminator you basically the terminator rides towards you on a terminator horse it just smashes your fucking rib cage in with a mace i mean yeah i mean i still find horses scary now i mean yeah yeah yeah you're in london and there's a mounted policeman and you're like i'm a little intimidated i mean they look silly but also i'm a bit scared because they're high up and the horse is strong yeah and also i don't i don't i don't want to be in the same pavement area as that horse that's it yeah even the feel of its hooves clopping on the floor i don't like is like scary so i get it god imagine and then i get it peasants of the um past i'm amazed that people didn't flee from battles more i'm amazed people stuck around

enough for battles to happen yeah yeah for sure because it wasn't even like you know at least if you're a mercenary or something you're like wow this is really scary but i do get a hundred florins and instead it was just like you're just there in your fucking rags thinking uh i kind of get nothing i maybe if i could steal something when no one's looking, I could get like an amulet from someone who's dead. If I don't die. I'm doing this to defend the property of a king who fucking hates me. Who hates me and fucks my fucking wife and takes all my turnips and I have to bow and I live in mud and he doesn't live in mud.

This is crazy. Also, if I get like a scratch from one of these guys it's gonna go green and itchy and smelly and i'll probably die man i was listening to um something about the invention of antibiotics yeah one of the first people who was the first test subject for antibiotics was an English man who got a cut on his cheek from a rose thorn. He was gardening and he just got scratched on his cheek. And he got infected and he got really, really ill. And they treated him with this very rudimentary penicillin, like original penicillin, which was only in such small, small doses

because they couldn't extract it at industrial scale yet. And he did a bit better and then he did badly again and he died. And I'm like, you could die because you got scratched gardening. You could die. Can you imagine? Gardening. If you got scratched by a rose garden,

you could look at it and go, that might be me. I'm done. It's unfathomable. I'm done. I got scratched by a rose gardening. Just fall over and scrape your knee and just go,

well, goodbye. That's fucked. Fucking hell. That's fucked. That is fucked. Fucking hell. Also, just like... I mean, it's no wonder the population,

human population exploded in the 20th century. Yeah. Because fucking deaths like that weren't happening anymore. People weren't dying because they stubbed their toe or whatever fucking thing you used to take. Maybe it was in the Roman Legion exhibit at the British Museum, but it was somewhere where I was like, even back then they would do what they would call heroic surgery.

And that was like internal surgery. Without painkillers? Well, I don't know. I mean, they hit you in the head, they'd feed you some fucking rum or equivalent like god knows but like there were there's sometimes people still somehow manage to survive that's that's crazy yeah um yeah i don't know i cut myself i cut myself all the fucking time you cut yourself on bread i i've cut a knuckle on bread honestly crusty bread cut me up and to think

i i wonder how many times do you reckon i've actually died how many times do you think i've died actually in my life from cuts you know yeah that's that's true what's what's our medieval death count what do you think your medieval death count is mine is is high because i had asthma i had pneumonia as a kid i had yeah chicken pox um i had oh man my my my i've had lung infection oh yeah was that maybe one lung infection i've i've asthma i've got asthma i got hay fever and but i mean and all the inoculations I've had I sometimes think what would I be like if I was living in medieval times and I imagine me now

with all the things I know now going around, oh yeah, maybe I'd be quite quite an important member of society, I could get things done but would I even have lived this long? I cut myself all the fucking time i'd be dead i don't think i'd have made it at all yeah i remember even as a kid because i was so

and still am so allergic to horses even as a kid i was like well i wouldn't be allowed to be a knight like i can't breathe near those animals and maybe that's why I like history. Because even from a young age, I couldn't even be romantic in my own head about it. I was like, oh, I could be a knight in medieval times, if we somehow cure hay fever. Anyway, it just never seemed conceivable.

But have you seen now, Phil, the world is heading for depopulation. That's the next problem. Yeah. We're not making enough babies. I swear that turned on a dime. Well, that's the next problem yeah we're making enough babies i swear that that turned on a dime well that's the thing when when the world is overpopulated and then now the world's underpopulated why wasn't i don't remember a golden period of people going we have the exact right number of people around no one that never came no no it never did that should have come logically i think that that ideal period

was the 50s or maybe the 70s where it was like hardly any old people drawing pensions and loads and loads of young educated workers yeah that was the ultimate time um because it's not just about how many people in total you have It's about how old They are and how many of each cohort you have You got something ringing there Oh fuck sorry thanks I'll be back in a sec I'll keep it running Okay

I don't know sometimes They seem quite inconsistent the delivery companies Sometimes if you're not there they'll go It's fine we'll leave it here. You pick it up when you're way back. And then sometimes you get an email saying, you were not in and we daren't leave it anywhere but in your supple

just hands. We will try again next year. And you're like, just leave it by the fucking doorman. This must have been one of the latter guys one of the what oh yeah that's true well you've um you've said you've always got you've always managed to have a packet delivered during a bud pod recording yeah yeah almost and listen to this thing i'm just getting stuff delivered all the time it's not that much but it does always just goes on amazon

for like cups of coffee or like single ice cubes things yeah single sheets of toilet paper um yeah but i've already had my amazon delivery today your daily amazon delivery yeah lens wipes baby i'm addicted to lens wipes for my glasses look this, this one just came in. These are the e-cloth brand spectacle wipes. I was not expecting this turn. I was not expecting this. I'm addicted to having lens wipes all around the house because I hate having smudged glasses. I hate it.

So now I have to have one in every room. I want to eventually get to a point where I've got one in every in the pocket of every jacket so i'm never without a lens wipe because you might find yourself pierre in the cinema all of a sudden as i did recently watching dune 2 have you spoken about dune 2 i haven't seen it yet everyone loves it i loved it it's so good i hadn't seen dune 1 so me and me and the gal we watched it a couple of days before Dune 2 and then went and saw Dune 2

and IMAX yeah really good man really good I'm not a big sci-fi guy well I like sci-fi when it's about ideas the best sci-fi is sci-fi about like ideas like Arrival I only care about Arrival

Dune has a lot of great ideas uh the the original twilight zone has some fantastic ideas that's that's you know that's what great sci-fi is to me i don't really care about flying around in spaceships and going through wormholes and pew pew pewing and i don't really care about that and there's not much of that at all in dune which i really like but there's a lot of like great ideas about about religion and fate and um resource extraction and colonialism and um miss and like the idea of what is it? The What is a Messiah predicted by?

Prophecy. A prophecy. Yeah, yeah. Prophecies and Worms. Big, fat, juicy worms, baby. Big old boys. Big, yummy worms.

And the music is so good the sound is so good I love it I love how creepy it is I love it's so good yeah is it creepy well unsettling the imagery is unsettling and this it's like you know you go to the Harkonnen planet and it's

literally black and white and yes that's true it's so good it's so good goth planet bald goth planet it's true it's the row i really really liked it um it's speaking of sci-fi yeah i'm in some science oh yeah yeah of course fuck i meant if you follow me on instagram you might have spotted that i have a brief cameo in Three Body Problem which is on Netflix right now Three Bloody Problem

Three Bloody Problem written by by C. Sin Liu shout out to her brother Chinese novelist who wrote these sci-fi books. And filmed it a couple of years ago,

my little part. And it's out now. I'm in the third episode. Oh, okay. Yes. And you're wearing puffy pants. Wearing puffy Renaissance pants. There's a few comedy cameos. It me kevin eldon yeah um uh reese shearsmith and mark gaitis and uh oh and ade edmondson oh yes yes yes it's me

and the old boys yeah you and the old fuckers there um uh kevin eldon was in napoleon as well i don't know how he's in loads he's in he's in games of game of thrones twice as different people i think i think he gets killed i think he's a god who gets killed twice i think they just the the the game of thrones producers who have also made this show just love getting Ken Alden killed, I guess. Mark Gatiss is in Game of Thrones as well. Oh yeah, who is he? He's the Iron Bank guy.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, of course. He's got a little ruff on. He's got a little ruff on He's got a little rough on. And he talks about the bank in a very soft way. He's good. He talks about that very well. Yeah, he's very good. Kevin Eldon's in everything.

And now James Acaster's in Ghostbusters. Yeah, he's in Ghostbusters. Yeah, he's in something else at the moment, I think. Is he? Seize Them. Seize Them? Is that a movie? Oh, I don't know. Are you telling me, Phil, that this is a golden age for slightly odd British

comedy people sneaking into Hollywood films? Yeah, here we go. Seize Them. I don't know if Seize Them is Hollywood or British. It's pretty British. Ah! Ben Ashenden is in it who is he we know ben back in the day hello ben um did they write it is this the one that they wrote so phil what do you think this is about how do you think this is happening why do you think this is happening the comedians are being cast in shows and movies and shows no but british comedians are sneaking their sloppy little

bums into massive shows streaming things big old stuff well i think a big part of it is how many studios have moved to london and how many american productions have preferred to shoot in the uk and london and you know the the london studios industry has really boomed in the last couple years i think for a while there it was impossible to get a slot in a London movie studio for like three or four years it's all booked up we've got Leavesden, we've got Pinewood

we now have the new Netflix studios I can't remember where they are Buckingham Palace and they're building another one somewhere I can't remember I think just filming in the uk you'll get more british actors you get more british crew and you just slowly slowly

move into the british space and become aware of british stuff and i think like american nerds are into british comedy yes american nerds have been making more and more of American television than ever before because of the comic book boom. Matt Berry's in so much. They love Matt Berry. Yeah. Yeah. Apparently, I've heard Judd Apatow's responsible for a lot of it, because Judd Apatow watches

British comedy. He gets it all sent to him somehow. Right. So that's why Matt Berry and Sharon Horgan have sort of cracked. Yes. Big time movies and like richard ayawade he voices a um you know he voiced a cyborg in mandalorian one episode as richard oh yeah yeah yeah yeah matt barry did as well i think yeah he had a very funny cameo on community matt berry as a grifter um highly recommend watching that episode even if it's just on its own just for his voice work and his mad appearance um yeah maybe that's it have you have you got anything

have you snuck into any other hollywood films because i i'd completely forgotten that you'd filmed um for three body problem until i saw the clips floating around this week and i sort of went oh what the oh yeah um do i am i i don't think so no that's how far in advance all this is done it's like to the point where you can literally be like oh maybe i don't know yeah yeah well yeah but it's also like no i'm pretty sure it's not i think i think you know i think i've had you know a good spell with wonka and then three body problem um okay here's a question you get to have a small part in a big hollywood like blockbuster past or present it is a it's not it's not like a cool part it is like a silly

you know yeah like you're behind a bar that gets robbed and you're like whoa or like whatever like you pop up like it's not a big role but you do get to be involved and you are in the film yeah what film is it oh batman batman easily which one then if they do another robert patterson one no no i mean like you can be from the past as well you can say godfather you could say oh i see well i said batman because when we're filming wonka we were in leaves and studios where they're also filming a lot of the batman and and comedian and friend of ours janine haruni yes is in it briefly as a um a lady of the evening i don't know what you meant to say now but um she's a goombas uh side squeeze um and she's very good at it but i was like oh wow imagine that's so cool to be in a batman movie yeah she's a maybe she's a guma guma um okay oh in that case oh maybe the

the dark knight the most important movie in any boy's life the dark knight 2008 millennial men's breakfast at tiffany's yeah, that's how fucking Romeo and Juliet by Baz Luhrmann is The Dark Knight. Yeah, that's true. Yeah, that would be a good one. What else would I have liked to... I would like to be in The Shining.

Oh, great. As what? I don't know, but just because as a movie it's it's every every frame of it has been studied like academically by people so if you're in it people really know that you were in it there aren't actually many characters in yeah it'd be weird if i was just another guest morning oh you seem weirder than yesterday i would have loved to have been the weird animal blowjob people. Oh, yeah, yeah. For the end.

It's such a great icebreaker to go, the guy wearing the mask, that's me. That's me. Like, that's the Bud Pot scene. Phil's wearing the mask and I'm sucking him off. No, the one doing the sucking off has the mask. Oh, no, that's true. The guy getting sucked off is in, like, a black tie. That's right, okay. So you wear the mask and I'll off has the mask oh no that's true is in like a black tie

that's right okay so you wear the mask and i'll sit on the bed in black tie and then if out of context bud pot is listening you can you can photoshop this somehow out of context bud pot has been doing some fantastic work work yes shout out if you guys are on instagram out of context bud pod on instagram is doing great work and in fact um uh we've got some good correspondence from them which we should do before we start the correspondence just want to quickly say i am hosting very exciting pierre yeah i'm hosting this year's bafta video games awards bafta do a video games awards they have done since 2004 and I am hosting it this year and it's on the 11th of April and you can actually stream it for free I think um uh yeah yeah it must be for free

on YouTube X and uh Twitch on the 11th of April at 7 p.m it's uh really cool so if you're into games check it out hopefully i i i don't hopefully i i do a nice job for you there yeah it's fun pierre i'm living the the dream i always had as a kid which was to have to play games as a job because i'm playing through as many of the nominees as i can right now and it hasn't ruined it for you no no well i mean what has ruined well i've never played this many games in parallel at once i've normally like to focus on the game finish it move on the next one but now i'm playing lots at once and i i've only finished one game and it wasn't even one of this year's it was an old game to bridge the gap into one of this year's games yeah and the story um so i haven't finished any of the games this year and games just get longer and longer and longer they're like movies and so finishing them is

becoming a bigger and bigger task but but that's a good old time yeah you're having you're doing the video game equivalent of when homer's being force-fed donuts in hell. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Basel likes them. All right. Okay, let's do some correspondence. Yeah.

Yeah. Letters. Emails. Phone calls. To be jacking. Your sister. Keep a straight eye. Letters.

Correspondence. It amazes me, by the way, when Microsoft sends an email where it's like, update to your terms of use. And it's like, you're Microsoft. You could fuck me if you wanted to. Yeah, it's not like at any point it goes, do you agree we can discuss if you have any issues? It's just like, accept or no more excel for you yeah oh hey do you need to use computers uh yeah i do oh okay well then this is what it's going to be like now

okay thanks microsoft sorry sorry for looking at you in the eye. That's all it is. Don't pretend that we're negotiating this fucking... Yeah. Like we're sharing a bunk bed. It's so stupid. Just do it. Don't even tell me. Why tell me?

Microsoft is in the top bunk going, can I have the top bunk? Do you mind? Yeah, and it has a gun. And I'm going, well, I was thinking I might go to the top bunk and you mind yeah and it has a gun and going well i was thinking i might go to the top bunk and microsoft's looking down going i'm already in the top bunk though microsoft is lying in the top bunk nude with a gun and fully aroused and saying can i have the top but please yeah please yes

yes Please. Yeah, please. Yes. Pointing the gun at you while stroking his dick. Yeah. Can I have the top bunk? Can I have the top bunk? Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. Please. I'll be down here. Jesus.

We've heard from Ben. Ben. Ben. We've heard from Ben. Ben! Go on, hen. Which is a term of endearment in Scotland. It's true.

You're not wrong. Doopy doopy doopy poopy. Ben says, dear P, er, no, smelly, and full pang. P, er, no, smelly, and full pang. P, er, no, smelly is great. Yeah. Full pang. Yeah, full pang.

Like a pang of pain? Or a full pan, as in like a toilet? A full pan. It has the G on. There is a G, full pang. I don't know. I guess a G, full pang. I don't know. I guess it must mean a pang like pain. Yeah, full pang.

A burst of pain. Well, either way, Ben says, I went into a local convenience store recently and found myself frozen on the spot gazing at these fridge magnets, experiencing the tats sublime as one might do on encountering a live, laugh, love wall hanging by Rothko. Enjoy, and as ever, Koji Ben. So let's look at this tat here.

It's a sort of fairy, multicolored, crowded constellation of fridge magnets. Okay. All for sale, on like a display board, is that it? Just kind of on a i suppose they are for sale but they are just kind of fair pretty haphazardly jimbled all over the uh the fridge or whatever the thing he's looking at is so there's some pretty practical stuff here magnet wise important messages that's one. It just says important messages? Yeah.

Oh, for you to put important messages on. Yeah, okay. Yes. Okay, so here's a picture. Would you like to guess the caption or the picture? You can have one. Ooh, okay. I would like to guess the caption okay it is a picture of a frisian dairy cow in a field

yep so it's a photograph are those the ones with the hair a lot of hair coming down the sides no no those are those are angus uh there's a highland highland cows no this is a classic black and white like cartoon cow yeah okay and And it's a photograph in a field. And it has like a huge... Its udders are like massive. Its udders are like the size of its whole back half almost. Like back third. And it's a photo.

It may have been manipulated, but it's not a cartoon. Okay. So it's a cow with huge udders. And the caption is blank, blank. Milk me. Well, I was about to say is a clue sassier than that, but milk me is a pretty sassy thing to say to someone.

Right, right, right. It's more cliche than that. Got milk? Yay! Yay! You got it. Okay, so here's one that it's it's in it's in a very confusing mixture of white black and glittery pink okay there's a lot of colors going on and they're quite unusual colors in combination

okay so in kind of 70s bubble writing, it says blank power. Yep. And then underneath blank power, it says, we're here. We're hungry. We're blanking for blank. Wow. Yeah. Is it girl power at the top?

No. It's all pink and sparkly, so it looks like it should be girl power at the top? No It's all pink and sparkly So it looks like it should be girl power But it's more Specific than that I suppose Blank power Blank power We're hungry

We're blanking for blank And we're blanking for blank Yeah We're looking for food at the bottom unbelievably yeah it's we're here we're hungry we're looking for seconds we're looking for seconds okay blank power i cannot believe you got that blankank power would be like glutton power, greedy power. It's fat power.

Fat power. It just says fat power. Fat power. We're here. We're hungry. We're looking for seconds. That doesn't rhyme. It's meant to rhyme, isn't it?

Yeah. Also, seconds of what? Power? You mean you've already had your you've already finished the power we gave you that power we're here we're hungry and we're looking for seconds yeah yeah sure sure sure i mean they're looking for the power to have seconds without judgment is that the power they're looking for yeah i suppose but they are admitting that we've already given them a big bowl of power and they've just finished it sooner than they thought but i guess in it's in

their philosophy that what separates the non-fat from the fat is the you know if they were satisfied by the first serving then they wouldn't be coming back and there would be no need for this magnet but yeah that's true that's true i wouldn't need this back and there would be no need for this magnet. Yeah, that's true. That's true. I wouldn't need this magnet if you had given me enough. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's right. Like, you know those signs that's, I don't know,

like those kind of sassy modern protest signs where a kid has a sign saying, I should be at school, but then I need to, because it's climate protest, whatever. Maybe they have a sign that's like, I should still be eating right now. But instead, I'm here looking for seconds. That would be such a funny badge to wear at a buffet.

I should still be eating, but if your plates weren't so fucking small, I wouldn't have to get back up and spoon myself more of this potato salad, would I? And the hotel worker is looking at the floor saying, no. Would I? No. Exactly. Maybe that's what they mean. Yeah. So here's a glittery

one it's glittery and green and it has red and blue writing on the glittery green background so it looks horrible the colours are terrible yeah very garish hey you out of the blank pool out of the blank pool out of the gene pool yeah

yes now that that yeah that is i would say eugenicist i was gonna say it's exactly what i was gonna say initially you think oh that's funny and sassy and it's like wait hang on like that's one of those ones yeah imagine that just being written in black and white like courier sands but just with a big swastika on it exactly you only give it any benefit of the doubt so sassy benefit of the doubt because it's on a green background and it's yeah and it's got sparkly magnet it's really funny out of the gene pool you will be stopped from breathing but it's funny it's on a little magnet it's so funny that it's like

it takes you a second because it's written on a sparkly green background but then if you saw it like wade who put up that magnet and it's like a guy in a ss uniform you go i knew it i knew it but who is putting that magnet up on the fridge of their own house presumably they're seeing it the most it'd be very funny to put it at the eye level of children so only the child in the house ever sees it when they go to the fridge maybe um if you're like extinctionist you're like we should humanity should let itself go extinct there's people who believe that right yeah okay so maybe they they put it on the on the fridge so they look at it and they go oh yeah i must make sure not to hey you out of the gene pool yeah i'm i i need to remember to live laugh love and to not get in the gene pool

yeah yeah it's a it's a eugenicist fridge magnet. It's a rare category. So here's another sparkly one. Finally out of blank. Let's go blank. Oh, no. Finally out of blank. Let's go blank. Oh, finally out of wine?

No, no. But what was your second half going to be with that one? Let's go shopping. Let's go shopping, baby. You got it. Finally out of blank. Finally out of... Is it booze?

No. Finally out of cheese. Let's go shopping. No, it's not? No. Finally out of cheese. Let's go shopping. No, it's not an object. It's a concept. Oh, shopping for a concept. Finally out of fucks to give. Let's go shopping for fucks.

I mean, you've got the vibe right. But they aren't... I see what you've done there they aren't shopping for what they're out of is it finally out of worries kind of money no

but it's to do with money and worries you could say it's to do with money and worries finally out of work no what is money worries a synonym for But it's to do with money and worries You could say it's to do with money and worries Finally out of work? No What is money worries a synonym for? Money worries is a synonym for Anxiety No, like what's another way of saying money worries?

Poor Poor? Poor? Poor Poor Financially insecure Insecurities But what is What makes people feel financially insecure

If they have Bills Debts Finally out of debt Let's go shopping bad advice um and then this one says uh the difference between my husband and my kids is that my husband gets a paycheck so she fucks her kids that's interesting that's an interesting magnet yeah my husband is the same as my kids except he has he he gets a paycheck not he even he has a job he gets a paycheck he gets a paycheck from he's the same

he's the same as them he's otherwise otherwise their relationships are indistinguishable from one another. Yeah, I have to bath him and breastfeed him. And he is in nappies. Yeah, okay. I have to take him to school. I have to drive him to swimming. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I, yeah, I help him with his homework.

I have to put him to bed at 8 o'clock. Oh, this one would get you cancelled now. Yep. My Indian name is Sleeps at Desk. Oh, Native American Indian. That's it. It would be offensive even if it said my Native American name. There's so many layers of wrong yes it's wrong because you're you're named after the first thing your father sees is that right after you're born yeah but even that's like specifically the sioux or the apache or something oh right but that's but that's the

that's the trope they're playing on yes yes it is yeah it's either your mother or your father the first thing they see when they leave the... The birthing tent. The birthing tent, yeah. Or at least that's the trope, yeah. So that's a magnet that... These magnets are designed to get people in trouble, I think. Yeah, yeah.

That might work. Well, speaking of trouble, we're in trouble because we've run out of time. Yeah, it's true. Yeah. God damn it. How have we done this again? But we will see beautiful patrons in the...

Yes? Oh, we'll see our beautiful patrons in the exclusive fridge. In the exclusive fridge. Yeah exclusive uh in the exclusive fridge um yeah as you guys hear exclusive fridge shop of the patreon yes the bonus part um as you guys hear this i will have already started my soho run uh we are going to add an extra day um on saturday i'm going to do the show on saturday at 7 15 or whatever it is and then again at like nine so there's an extra show if you if you're missing the the soho run there are still tickets left across the run but they tend to be like solo seats in random places so they're

not selling it's extremely annoying very hard to sell those seats creepy seats creepy anorak seats pervert seats i call them the perv seats, yeah. Yeah. Well, unfortunately, I think they're also like the best fan seats because those are the people who are there because they really like it. Why not come with your friend and just sit separately and make friends with whoever you're muscling in on? I think that's a very underrated thing to go to a show with someone and sit separately and have individual experiences and then share notes afterwards.

I think that's fun. I think it's a good way to experience culture, and I think it's cool also you're not going to talk to you shouldn't fucking talk to each other during the whole thing anyway so there's no point sitting together exactly what are you missing out on nothing a couple of nudges who gives a shit about nudges nothing go to pierce show i'm i'll be going i'll be going i kind of i can't contain my excitement i've not seen the show yet i I'm really looking forward to it. As for me,

I'm hosting the BAFTA Games Awards on April 11th. I'm filming my next special on April 26th at the Sam Wanamaker Theatre at Shakespeare's Globe, which will be very cool. But I think I might be sold out. I don't know if they're going to release more tickets,

but check out the Globe website if you want to come. Just make sure. But it might be sold out. I don't know if they're going to release more tickets, but check out the Globe website if you want to come. Just make sure. But it might be sold out. Sorry if it is. Otherwise, yeah, see patrons in the bonus pod and all our other friends next week. Bye.

Bye.