Business Innovators Radio - Interview with Kerry Morris, CFP® Founder of HonorShield- Widows Are Firing Their Husband’s Financial Advisor at an Alarming Rate

Episode Date: November 2, 2023

Kerry Morris, Author of When Retirement Goes Bad, Life Sucks, Certified Financial Educator, and CERTIFIED FINANCIAL PLANNER™ professional.Kerry Morris has been serving families for the past twenty-five years as a financial planner and advisor. He has recently launched HonorShield, LLC., as a way to challenge the current thinking and behavior of consumers and financial advisors preparing for the potential high cost of aging.He has spent several of his twenty-five-year career advising hundreds of families experiencing the nightmare of paying for care. The question, always, was “how to make the money last”?Morris has watched too many families, too many men and women not be fully prepared for retirement. The financial industry has put this cost-of-care issue on total “ignore” mode, often shoving it onto a small but valiant band of “insurance specialists” around the country. Only about 1 in 100 Americans embrace this model. That is a problem for American families and our country.Morris found a better way, a win-win solution that more Americans could feel good about embracing. It’s a whole new way to approach and solve this problem: the LCAP—the Longevity Care Allocation Plan. Every person, every family deserves to know how an LCAP works. Kerry Morris has made it his life’s goal to ensure that those he helps can hold their head high and know that no matter what curve balls retirement throws at them, they will be prepared.“One of the most important things I’ve learned in my 25 years in the business is that a great life is supported by three areas, Health, Relationships, and Money. My job is to make sure that a family’s money is working effectively to accomplish that job.”Learn More:http://www.honorshield.com/Influential Entrepreneurs with Mike Saundershttps://businessinnovatorsradio.com/influential-entrepreneurs-with-mike-saunders/Source: https://businessinnovatorsradio.com/interview-with-kerry-morris-cfp-founder-of-honorshield-widows-are-firing-their-husbands-financial-advisor-at-an-alarming-rate

Welcome to influential entrepreneurs, bringing you interviews with elite business leaders and experts, sharing tips and strategies for elevating your business to the next level. Here's your host, Mike Saunders. Hello and welcome to this episode of Influential Entrepreneurs. This is Mike Saunders, the authority positioning coach. Today we have back with us, Carrie Morris, who's the founder of Onershield, and we'll be talking about should widows fire their husband's financial advisor. Carrie, welcome back to the program. Thank you, Mike. Yeah, good to be back, you know.

I love this question. What do you think about that question? Yeah, this is quite an interesting one where it's like, hold up. What? So let's kind of set the stage here. And when would this come up? So as an example, obviously a widow. The husband passes away.

And then there's a decision that needs to be made. So what are some of those things and considerations? that they need to be thinking about as an example, you know, should this be considered, you know, the week after the funeral, you know, so I know we want to dive into some of these things, but I find this a really interesting, you know, should they fire them or should they keep them? So get us started with what you are advising your clients to do. Yeah. And, you know, the quick answer to should they fire their husband's financial advisor is it depends.

Maybe, right? Yeah, all right. And I'll tell you, where I, so I'm the kind of advisor that actually. actually, a lot of couples came to us over the years and actually hired us so that we would be there to take care of the wife after he passed away with the assumption being he was going to pass first, right? And so I wasn't aware that this would become a problem. And then a friend of mine named Dave Machia, who's done a lot of research and a lot of writing, that's David Machia. and he has he discovered through their research and their studies that literally about 70% of widows are firing their husband's financial advisor. Wow.

That's a huge number. And you know, it makes me think of something else lifespan. So why are we talking about widows firing their husband's financial advisor and why aren't we saying widowers firing their wife's financial advisor? Well, isn't it true that statistically research shows that women are living longer than men? So that's why this conundrum is here. Yeah, that's part of it. And it's multifaceted. So, you know, even though we'll give it the best treatment we can today to kind of help bring some light to this.

And it also is generational too. And we're talking about boomers here, right? Not so much so for the greatest generation. I think that that didn't come about. What we're seeing here, this trend is not until, this is a very current present day thing. And it's only going to, it's only going to change even more. And get this, statistically, out of most couples, the husband is the one who tends to kind of work with the finances and so forth. And believe me, I've had tons of clients over the years where the wife didn't want to have, she didn't want to have

to be bothered with it in a way a lot of times. Yeah. So there's a lot of different factors to this, but we'll, we'll get to what really is the number one piece here in a second. Yeah. So I, because, you know, you always hear these, you know, well, here's, you know, the top 10, but it's like when you go from 10, 9, 8, 7, you want to hear what's the number one? You know, forget number 9 or 10 because that's probably insular.

Let's talk about number one. So what should, for starters, what should a widowed woman think about, regarding retaining. So just kind of get started from the surface level before we get to number one. What are some of the things they should be considering? Yeah, I think it has to do with, are they comfortable with that advisor? You know, has that advisor made a point to make sure that they have included them over the years? You know, now if they self-select to not be included, then the advisor can't control that, you know, but how's it gone? I mean, you know, is the, is it, is it, has it been the husband? Because so like, we'll see situations, um,

where the husband and the advisor, they're just jumping off all into kind of charts and, uh, you know, there, there's a big difference. I mean, it's Mars and Venus, right? So this, actually, this conversation, Mike, really goes back to some foundational differences between men and women, you know, so it's, it's, uh, I would say tangible and intangible. Um, um, You know, everybody's kind of looking for hard code checklist, but it really, and, you know, we'll talk about some of those differences, but the considerations are almost instinctual. Yeah. Like you mentioned, Mars and Venus, it's almost like sometimes, not in all cases, but sometimes men just want to be like, just tell me the facts, move on. Go, go, go, go.

Women might be like, no, no, no, don't confuse me with numbers and charts and graphs. Tell me the story behind, you know, and you hear that. on start tank a lot too. It's like, okay, that's great about the pitch and all that. But how do you get in it? What is what makes, what drives you? And so it really is how specific people communicate. Yeah, exactly. And, you know, it literally, it may be coming down to how does how does she feel about that advisor? You know, so there's a history there that goes into it. There's a, there's a feeling, you know, that old saying, like people remember more of how you made them feel than. you know, what you did for them. What you said. Yeah. Then what you said. Yeah. Yep. Maya Angelou said that. Yeah. So it's, uh, it's a big deal. It's a big deal.

So let's just start at the summit. What's the number one reason? Yeah. I like starting number one because it, it, it, it, everything else falls into place. Right. If you fix number one. Yeah. If you're going to do 10, it leaves two through 10 in the, in the, in the big shadow. Number one cast a big shadow. And really, it boils down to the research, it comes down to relationship, okay? Yeah. Which we were kind of touching all over it. And, you know, how, and sometimes it's something that's gradual. It's not that the advisors are doing it on purpose.

You know, we have, we still have a very unbalanced advisor population. You know, I think it's under, well, I think in the CFP world, there's about 25% of the CFPs are women. We, but it's less than that in the over, much less than that in the overall advisor population, you know, so, I mean, and that's why I mentioned Mars and Venus because part of this is just, I mean, guys are kind of known for not relating very well a lot of times to ladies. But let me tell you when you're, you know, I know in our practice, it's just always been very, very important. But we tried to really, so as an advisor, sometimes you almost have to overweight your intentions and overweight your time, you know, the time you spend with the client to really try to pull the wife in sometimes. And so a lot of us, we know automatically, like if we're going to ask a question to a married

couple, we always ask the wife first, always. because we're going to get a, you know, a clear answer. And then you get into dynamics, too, of you're going to have one spouse more dominant. Sometimes you'll have a couple come in and she's going to do all the talking, you know, so that happens too. So this topic today we're discussing, it's not meant to put any hard stamps on anything other than that's a pretty doggone strong trend that's happening with the 70%. That's a large number, seven out of ten. And so it comes back to, again, remember I said it's kind of internal.

When you think about relationship, that all adds up over time to get to that point where, you know, she, she's just like, you know, she maybe. Something just doesn't sit right with me. Yeah. You know, that kind of thing. Maybe she goes and talks to a couple others and all of a sudden gets listened to in a different way and so forth and so on, you know. So because that number, go ahead. Go ahead.

Well, that husband's advisor, it is going to be, tend to a lot of times continue to operate in the same way, right? If the advisor's not aware of this and they're just not, again, a lot of times they're not doing it on purpose, right? But that's just how they're used to functioning because the men do focus and have priorities of different things than the ladies over the years. So that advisor is just trying to serve the client. And if the husband is the lead is the lead of the two, then that's what, but why should, you know, the advisor's not going to actually automatically just change, right, unless they're aware of this issue. Yep. Go ahead. Yeah, the advice.

I was going to just say something that you really just answered in the example I was thinking is, you know, the advisor may say to the husband, if he's the one that handles the money, he might, he might explain the same net result. that he thinks makes the case, which is, hey, we're going to put your life savings in such a trajectory forward that you're going to have, you know, wonderful gains and have a great retirement. And the husband is relating to that high-fiving mentally going, yep, good. But the wife needs to hear so that your kids are taking care of so that you can travel and do whatever you want, so that you don't have any worries. And it gets to more of the emotional side of things, as opposed to just show me the numbers

and boom, boom, boom. You said the same thing, but you just came about it from two different angles. Yeah. And it's like the lady's sitting there going, wait a minute. Hey, I'm sitting right here. And you know what? I'm the one that's going to have to take care of that, rascal. Yeah.

You know. Right. You know. Also, you said sitting right here. The 70% number is a pretty big number. And isn't it true that most of the advisors that are working with a couple, they want the husband and wife to be in the quarterly review, the annual review. So many times the wife is sitting right there, like you just said. Where's the breakdown? Oh, yeah. The breakdown is, it just happens

gradually again, the advisor, their delivery. So a lot of advisors, and I've been guilty of this, of this component in the past is, you know, investment advisors especially, we love our charts and graphs, man. You said it earlier, Mike. You know, like we, but, you know, what I learned over the years, especially I was in a study group for a year and a half and just learning that, you know, the charts and graphs and all that's great to do our research and the background, but it can be very overwhelming to the client base. And see, the guy, the husband client, a lot of times, he's just going to sit there, not his head because they're going to be more, you know, performance driven.

So, so let's just, let's just dig into for a second. Why is this such an issue? Okay. And it's really the foundational part that David and his team and others have been able to figure out is it really goes back to that men generally are more performance driven. I think men have a greater ability to see a future that's the way that they want it, whether everything's going to match that outcome or not. You know, they just want to know, you know, oh, what's the average return on this and da-da-da-da-da. And they're just trying to performance, performance, performance. It might be messy getting there.

They just want to focus on the end. Yeah, I mean, men are a lot of times just confident, oh, well, we'll deal with it. They're used to conquering all this. Not that the ladies aren't used to conquering things, but it's just on the other hand, the ladies, which is much wiser. Okay. You and I both know, we're both married. We both. And, you know, you and I know each other a little bit, but I guarantee you.

you, I would, if I had to bet, you would be a guy that leans into your wife's intuitions like I do. You know, they're using both sides of their brain, right? Unlike us. And so the ladies are smart enough to go, hey, you know, they're driven by their goals, you know, risk reduction, confidence. And, you know, over and over again, what's being found in the findings of why you and I are even discussing this today and why that number is so big is it comes down to that goals risk reduction and confidence. And so the ladies, they want to just, they want to understand, okay, how does this particular recommendation and advisors making or how the way you've got me set up, how does that meet my goals? And in other words, they're not going to sacrifice getting, they, they're not going to

sacrifice reaching their goal just for a sports car, you know, just for, they, they would rather have a nice sedan using that metaphor that has a higher degree of confidence to get them to their goal, not their goal plus 1x or 2x, right? Yeah. So the guys are just tempted to swing for the fence more. And the ladies are, I'm going to switch metaphors, aren't I? And the ladies are tempted, you know, they're going to take their singles and doubles and win the game, you know, more so often. Well, and, you know, let's throw another.

Let's throw another metaphor, the tortoise and the hair. The guys are like, let's just be the hair, just sprint. But then we lose our breath. And here comes that steady plotting tortoise that wins at the end of the day. So I think all of those are great examples because people are different. And I think that makes a whole lot of sense. You know, when I hear about a problem as a guy, you and I both would go, let's put our fix it hat on and how can we fix it?

So it makes me think what can advisors and clients do to solve the problem? And it makes me think it from two sides of the equation. Because what can an advisor do to solve this problem? But what can a client do to solve this problem? Because if, you know, we're talking about should widows fire the husband's advisor, you know, here is a lady that goes, I don't really necessarily love change. So it's not like I want to fire the advisor. So maybe some of the lessons we're learning here can be learned from both sides of the equation.

And so what can advisors do to solve the problem? And then what can the client do to solve the problem? Exactly. You know, and so advisors have got to get their head out of the sand for one and realized. And, you know, a lot of times change comes from just realizing things and saying, well, you know what? I have been doing that, not intentionally, but I've not dug in enough. And so the way that that can manifest itself into a new practice by an advisor is to just, make sure that they're including this language of goals and the risk reduction and the confidence

piece. In other words, when showing a pathway, explain to them like, hey, we could take more risk in this and this and this could happen, this positive, but this negative, or we can take this level of risk and then have a higher degree of certainty of getting there and we kind of narrow that risk spectrum, you know, but really tying it into goals. And again, you know, it's like, I'll give you a perfect example. I had a client recently. She's 65 and man, she really was so ready just to turn in that notice. She wanted to retire so bad. And so what enabled her after the analysis in our conversations, the whole nine yards, what it really allowed her to do that was that she was used to making money at a certain level, but she was plenty happy with a level, say, 30% below that for annual income. It met her needs and so forth. So that's a perfect example of she wasn't going to continue to, you know, force it or take higher risk. She was, it was more important to her to achieve the goal of retirement, having all of her base bills paid at a lower level of risk and have a higher level confidence.

So that might come with guarantee and income streams, you know. So where a guy might be tempted to keep swinging for the fences and just say, okay, well, I'll just chance it. Yeah, I've got all my faculties. let me just push, push, push, go, go. And in that case, that lady is like, I just want my schedule to be freed up and flexible. And if that means that I can adjust my lifestyle down a little bit, but still have my flexibility and freedom, now you're talking about language. So that's a, that's a really good example. Yeah.

And so like with Honor Shield, for example, you know, we deal with the high cost of aging, right? And so you've got a whole population that doesn't even, they don't even know the type of solutions that we have. And in our area of work with HonorShill, think about it, the burden on the ladies, this whole topic of men versus women and two different experiences is even heavier overweighted. You know, because the ladies in our country are by and far more the caregivers than the men. Nothing against the amazing men caregivers out there, okay? And like I said before, everybody, this conversation is not to be a hard template for everything. Not everybody's going to fit into this, what we're saying today, obviously. But we're just talking about this trend.

So that's what advisors can do. What clients can do, Mike, to help solve this problem is, I would say, one, husbands really encouraging wives to get involved, you know, come to that annual review, speak up, you know, and I'll tell you, stop and tell your advisor, maybe help them understand. Like, hey, you know, we really want to see the breakdown of how this relationship. to our goals. You would think that's happening anyways. I'm a little spoiled being kind of part of the CFP world. I'm used to breaking all that stuff. We're very goals oriented type planning. But, you know, this is what's happening across a broad range of advisors out there. And so clients can

definitely help with that by going in and being verbal about all this. Ladies, you know, taking the initiative early. And really, again, let's not. have our head in the sand about aging. Let's not have our head in the sand about like, hey, you know, if he dies first, here's what, you know, here's what the goals are. If she, and actually, um, the last thing I'll say about that is really identifying what is important to the, to the family. You know, what, it seems like an obvious question, but that really takes some discovery sometimes to get down to the bottom line of what, is important to that wife, to that husband.

Because that first response of what's important, you know, is going to be whatever the answer is. And it's like, okay, that's just the first response. But what's important about that? Why is that so impactful? Oh, well, I guess if I had that, then it would make me feel this or accomplish that. That's wonderful. And then you go, if you can't go 427 layers deep, but if you don't take that first answer as like the final answer and you just dig and dig and all of a sudden, you realize that they really want to achieve. this because of that. Right. Exactly. And, you know, because everybody's got to have income,

everybody's got to have certain things. Those are all basic and foundational. And so you're, you've got your, you know, your 12 loaves and two fish. Everybody comes with their basket, what they have, right? And then it's a matter of can we make that, how do we, how do we feed retirement? I mean, this whole thing, and don't get me started, we don't have time for that. But this whole thing of retirement is still a new, it's still a new thing, this idea of retirement. But that's for another episode, right? Yeah, exactly. Well, getting, getting everyone on the same page is huge. Recognizing that this could be potentially a opportunity to clarify communication styles is huge. So I think

that's these, these points have been really eye-opening, especially in light of that 70% statistic. Yeah. So, you know, you and I did an episode one time about fiduciary standard. You see how this is what we just talked about today is another brick in that wall, you know. And so that's why it can be feeling overwhelming to folks, you know, to even go through this process and of working with an advisor or working with a planner and things like that. Because it, but if, if you can kind of address one brick in the wall at a time or kind of understand where the pieces fit, then that, that starts helping that sense of confidence, that sense that, okay, we're all pulling in the same direction, you know. And so we really want the industry to wake up and start realizing that,

you know, I mean, even from a business standpoint, Mike, the ladies in our country are on their way to controlling the bulk of the wealth in our country, like $30 plus trillion. And so from an industry standpoint, the industry got to wake up or they're going to just start losing clients. We also need more ladies in the advisory community. You know, we need more ladies to become financial advisors. But yeah, it's a, but it's, let's just finish with, it's, it's a really cool thing, though, when it does work together, when there's mutual respect, when you understand, like, I have a lot of widow clients and I'm actually having lunch tomorrow to celebrate with two of them of their

retirement and that kind of thing. And they were in, in, in. So anyways, it can be an incredibly positive thing. And you can tell the difference when they feel comfortable and you're doing things the way that they want and when you and when you're not. And when it's a seamless transition. So that's spectacular. So super, Kerry, thanks for those insights. If someone is listening wanting to learn more about HonorShield and how to connect with you, what is the best way that they can do that? I think Onershield.com is the easiest way.

they can click and schedule a call or, you know, shoot me and shoot us an email and get to me from there. But, yeah, honor shield.com, great way. Awesome. Thank you so much for coming back on Carrie. It's been a real pleasure talking with you. Thank you, Mike. See you next time, man. You've been listening to Influential Entrepreneurs with Mike Saunders.

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