Bussin' With The Boys - Jim Hensel

Episode Date: November 19, 2019

Thank you: www.regalrg.com  Anheuser Busch Ajax Turner Mental performance coach, Jim Hensel, joins Will and guest co-host Michael Chandler on the bus. Jim speaks on different tactics that help people with mental toughness and personal disciplined with the ultimate goal in mind to lead to personal success. Michael Chandler testifies how these lessons from Jim have helped him be successful.    Check out our sponsors:Regal Realty Group - Hunter BrileyPersonal 615-630-9735615-483-0856www.regalrg.comAnheuser BuschAjax Turner  Rate us 5 stars because you're for the boys. Website: bussinwtb.com Twitter: https://twitter.com/BussinWTB Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/bussinwtb/?hl=en Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/BussinWTB/  Merch: https://hangtn.com/collections/bussin-with-the-boysFor more, visit barstool.link/bussinwtbSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hey guys, it's us The Jonas Brothers. I'm Joe. I'm Kevin. And I'm Nick. And guess what? We created our own podcast called, Hey Jonas. We invented a podcast? Well, we didn't invent it.

We just contributed to it. We're the first people to do podcasts. We get to ask other people questions because we're sick and tired of being asked questions. Well, sick and tired is a strong way to put it. But, you know, tired and sick. Listen to Hey Jonas on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. Just listen. We don't care where you hear it.

Another podcast from some SNL late-night comedy guy, not quite. Unhumor me with Robert Smygel and Friends. Me and hilarious guests from Bob Odenkirk to David Letterman help make you funnier. This week, my guest, SNL's Mikey Day and head writer Streeter Seidel help an a cappella band with their between songs banter. Where does your group perform? We do some retirement homes. Those people are starving for banter.

Listen to humor me with Robert Smigel and Friends on the I-Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Michelle McPhee, and I've been unraveling the strangest criminal alliance I've ever reported on. A Mormon polygamist and an Armenian businessman. Multi-million dollar house, Ferraris and Lamborghinis, private jets, a billion dollar fraud. But how long can this alliance last? Tell me what you know. Is somebody coming after me?

Listen to Kingdom of Fraud on the Aihar Radio app. Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. The Boys! Yo, it's your boy, Comp Nasty, alongside his co-host, Taylor Luan. Obviously, you're listening to an intro right now, so you know the boys are not here next to me. I'm out here in beautiful Alameda, California. After another big win against the Cincinnati Bengals,

Raiders, the Boys, man, 6 and 4 right now, sitting pretty. Got to keep it going. Got to keep the momentum rolling. Got to keep that big dick energy. out of here in the black hole dude um speaking of the black hole you guys it's a fuck it's a fucking blast playing in front of the black hole it's like a holly it's like a holly party every weekend and i love it um but yeah man shoot the boy's been three and oh since being out of here so i'm having a great time it's always fun when you're winning obviously uh but it's been a blast man

these boys are rolling and i had no clue how young our team was we have like uh shit who knows like 10 starters that are like rookies. And hats off to them, man. This is the time of the year where they talk about the whole rookie wall. And these dudes, man, just have their middle finger up to this fucking rookie wall. And I love it, man. They're leading the charge out here. And, you know, obviously hats off to them.

But yeah, I had no clue, man. I'm like tired for second oldest on the team. You got Richie Incognito, who's 36, Benjamin Button, still doing it out there. clinging and banging for the boys, playing at a high level. He's 36, and then after that, there's a few of us at 30 years old. Man, we got a young squad, man. And it's awesome to see. There's a lot of good energy right now, so, you know, we have to keep that going.

You know, heading to this back half of November going into December back, you know, now when football matters most. But yeah, shout out the boys, man. And shout out Joseph Martinez. No, he's not a player. He's our first winner of the ticket giveaway for Busse, with the boys. Joseph Martinez brought his awesome father.

They had a great father Sunday yesterday. They flew in from San Antonio, Texas. His dad had to take a red eye because he drove five hours to get to the San Antonio airport. Very last minute drop of the hat. Freaking, we shot them out as the winner. Joseph Martinez as the winner, he couldn't believe it. Buy plane tickets last minute.

Had no idea they weren't in California. I figured they were already around here. But they're so committed and for the fucking boys in Raider Nation. and obviously busting with the boys that they bought last minute plane tickets drove, dad drove five hours to get the San Antonio airport. They fly all day yesterday, or,

they fly all day the day before the game on Saturday to make it to watch the game together on Sunday. Awesome people got to meet them in the parking lot after the game. Hope you guys had a hell of a time. It was awesome taking pictures of meeting you guys and talking with you. And I was fucking, that's awesome, man. It's cool to see. It's awesome that you took your dad.

He wanted to take his dad. because his dad taught him how to be a Raider fan growing up back in the day. So he wanted to treat his dad to one of the last home games in the black hole. So shout out to him, man. Yeah, before we get into much more, a huge special shoutout. Hunter Briley and the Regal Realty Group. They're out based out of Nashville, the MVP of the podcast, MVP, the little, he's a secret wheeling dealer out there in Nashville, man. Anything residential, commercial investment opportunity.

Hit up Hunter Briley. He will have you taken care of. Tell him the boys sent you. His personal is 615-630-9735. Their website is regal-rgy.com. But shout out Hunter Briley and the Regal Realty Group for, you know, providing the boys with, he hooked it up. The bus is getting fixed right now,

finding a home for the bus, the tailgates. If you see Hunter, give him a big thank you and a big hug for us. Speaking of tailgates, I assume there's going to be another one this weekend. Keep up to date with us at Bus and WTB. and again free drink, free food with that drink shout out Anheiser Bush

and Ajax Turner, the local distributor for Anheiser Bush providing the boys with everything under that beautiful Anahezer Bush umbrella Budweiser Bud Light, natural light, but most importantly those natural light celtes, those Catalina lime mixers and Aloha beaches.

6% alcohol. Get where you're going faster. Drink responsibly. Be smart and always do with that don't give attitude. What I mean by that, don't give attitude, dude, people are going to judge you because you drink selsers,

but who gives this shit, dude? We absolutely don't give a. Take pictures with your don't give a mentality. Hashtag don't give a and tag us so we can share on our stories, on Twitter,

on our YouTube channel like we've been doing every week for our fans, so we can have a great time engaging with you guys. Also, this weekend is the Jaguars Play at Tennessee.

The reason that is of important, is because the Neely family is going to get honored as the 12th man. And if you're new with us, Matt Neely was somebody who was a very important part of this podcast. He was one of the boys. He was one of the few that's been with us the entire time. And Matt was our first hire. Matt passed away a little over a month ago.

And, you know, it was a very tough time for bustle with the boys. Obviously, his family and friends. He was known as the Titans, the greatest Titans fan around. and obviously you can see that because the Titans are now honoring him and his family by allowing them to be the 12th man of the game. So if you're around Nashville, I encourage you to get to the game where you're Matt Neely for the boys' shirts. Show your support.

Man, I wish I could be there. I really do. But Matt would love it. You know he's looking down and he's for the boys, always in forever, man. And we miss you, Maddie. But please, you know, if you're around Nashville, get to that game. All right, on to this week's episode, we sat down with Jim Hensel. He's a mental performance coach.

He is the mental coach for Michael Chandler, the unreal MMA fighter. He's the mental coach for Rich Froning, the greatest crossfitter of all time, and plenty of guys out there on that CrossFit ranch that Froning has out there. But it was a very insightful podcast. I think you guys are really going to get a lot out of it. It was just me that sat down with him, myself and Michael Chandler. There was no Taylor on this episode. Really good stuff, though, similar to that Ben Newman podcast.

You know, we like to switch it up. We like to have some fun. We like to talk sports on some. We like to do just me and Taylor. And this one, we get a little deeper. We peel some layers back and have a great podcast with Jim Hensel. I think you're really going to love it. But again, guys, if you're new to the podcast, you can find us on all podcast platforms,

bust with the boys. You can find us on YouTube. Busting with the boys. Subscribe. Rate five stars. Leave reviews. Leave fun reviews, man. We really do.

We appreciate it. We're not shit without you guys. And you guys have allowed us to kind of make this thing a little more successful. But, hey, we love it. We're for the boys. You're for the boys. Keep doing God's work and being for the fucking boys. Again, shout us out.

And have a hell of a week, man. enjoy this episode and as always go be a fucking wolf we solid so you asked me if if I was a whiskey guy yeah you a whiskey guy I am what do you like are you a bourbon

American whiskey scotch rye so here's the trouble so my father-in-law I love my father-in-law one of the smartest guys I've ever met he's been athletic director at Tennessee Tech for a ton of years

and he's been working there for like 46 years okay And he drinks KG, Kentucky gentleman, just bottom shelf stuff. And I'm like, you know, and Papa Dave's, he's like got some money now. He's worked hard. He can do what he wants to do. And he said, I'm going to give you two pieces of advice. The first one is don't get used to the expensive stuff.

You know, that's the top shelf stuff. Be careful. Yeah. Because you're going to spend a bunch of money there. Every time. And I said, what's the second thing, Papa Dave? And he said, never drink more whiskey. then you can wake up from.

That's good. I like that. That's a nice bit of advice. That's a good word. Those are the two things. So my problem is I like expensive whiskey. I don't like cheap whiskey. What expensive whiskey do you go with?

I'm learning. I'm still learning. Oh, go ahead. I like Woodford's. Mm-hmm. You know. Yeah. Big Woodford guy.

Basil Hayden's. Basil Hayden? Basil Hayden? Not had it. The greatest. Not had it. Yeah. Urban.

So, yeah, I like, you know, some good whiskey on the rocks. Nice and mellow. I'm a rye guy. You're a rye guy? I like the rye, dude. Have you guys been to whiskey kitchen? No. Yes.

Down and it's by San Anahos and... M Street Restaurant. Yeah. Yeah. But they have like a plethora, solid word comp. A plethora of whiskey to taste, right? And you can get flights and everything like that. And I sat down and I was like, okay, this is the day where I'm going to figure out which

kind of whiskey I like. Because everybody, like, seems to know what their whiskey is. Right, yeah. So I'm like, I'm going to figure it out right here right now. And it was rye, dude. It was rye whiskey. I felt like it went down the smoothest. Woodford Reserve Rye has been my go-to.

Okay. For Reserve Rye. Because people have gotten it for me for like my birthday or events or something like that. Woodford's good. Yeah. And it was solid. So that's how I figured out that I like Rye the most. So let's like started talking about wisdom here.

Let's. So whiskey to wisdom. Let's go. Just like that. No, but let's talk whiskey wisdom. Have you broken the two rules? Oh, God. You know, because I for sure have.

Well, you know, I mean, I like, We all woke up. I like the highbrow stuff and I barely woke up a couple of times. We broke all the rules. Sorry, Papa. Sorry, Papa, Dave. Dang it. Yeah, dude.

Sometimes I like to consume a little too much. So that way, it's that much more challenging the next day. Right. Dude, are you here in this train out here? Yeah, that was the loudest train of all time, actually. It actually just derailed itself and got back on the track somehow. If you're not accustomed to bust with the boys, literally every time we have an episode, there's always a train.

going by. Always a train. So you've got to shout out the trains that go by. Shout out the trains that go by buss with the boys. But dude, Jim, I don't know. You said you've watched a couple of our episodes. I have. Or been aware of a couple of our things. We like to mix it up. We like to have fun. We like to raise a little hell. We like to get serious. We did one with Mike. A couple with Mike over here. He was on the Brennan Shob one. He's on this one.

The boy's on this one. Shout out the boy. And one on his own that's going to be, it's probably out. Who knows? We backlog our episodes. Okay. And kind of drop them. So we have a good mixture of, you know, fun, entertaining, yada, yada, yada, and then serious. Sure. And then Mike over here is like, hey, I really want to get my mental performance coach on.

Sure. And I'm all about that kind of stuff. Sure. So I was looking at your stuff. You work with Rich Froning. You work with Mike Chandler over here. Who else? Who else is in your clientele?

Talk to me about who you work with, kind of what you do. A little bit of background. Sure. Everything that we'll talk about today was something that I created out of necessity in my life. Okay. It goes all the way back to, I got, how old are you? 30. 30.

So I've got a 3-0, baby. I've got a 27-year-old daughter and a 25-year-old daughter, and it goes all the way back to the hardest time in my life, which is years ago, and my wife leaves. And I'm face-down depressed. and I don't know what direction to go next in my life. And I'm clawed and I'm reaching for whatever is truth in my life. And what I realized in that tough time was that I didn't own any of that. That was more my dads or somebody else's stuff. So you're saying you were kind of finger-pointing, or not finger-point,

but you're finding a reason why you are where you are. Hey, man, how do we get up and move forward? Yeah. What is worth living for, you know? And I had these two little girls. at that point three and five and I knew it needed to be a good dad and I wanted to be a good father for them and and so I'm I'm struggling like crazy just to kind of know what to do next and and for sure at that point clinically depressed like struggling to get up off the floor there were two big

things my wife left me and I didn't become a professional football player all all things that I thought were going to happen in my life and and so I'm just reaching for identity and I'm reaching for purpose and value in my life. And as I reached for that and I tried to figure out that really, really I just had emotion and momentum and that's not sustainable. So literally, and this is back

in the VHS days, I'm 51 years old, so I'm older. You're 51? 51. So, the boy looks solid. We're still hang out with Rich Froning and it'll work out. You'll be fine.

So I literally put the girls to sleep one night, came up and popped in the movie Gladiator. And most guys have seen Gladiator. Yeah. I just want to take my mind off my problems. And it happens to be at the scene in the movie where Maximus is squared off with Comedus. And he's fighting as this anonymous Gladiator. And he turns around to walk away from Comedus.

And Comedus says, hey, you know, gladiator, turn around. How dare you turn your back on me? And he wants to know his name? Maximus turns around. You know what I'm talking about the scene? Flips off his helmet. my name is Max Misraelius Desimus General of Felix Legions and he goes to this process of defining himself. I'm sitting on a couch in my house, Loveland, Colorado, depressed out of my brain, and I don't know where to go next.

And I say to myself, I'm a writer. I'm a journalism guy. Well, this is a movie. I get it. But in his darkest hour, he just said, this is who I am. This is what's purpose in my life. And this is what I'm going to do. And I thought, well, I'm going to do that.

I don't know what else to do, but I'm going to do that. In that moment. In that moment. Is when it's something started to click for you. That's the revelation to me. I don't own any of these beliefs. I don't really know who the hell I am. I'm stuck in a ton of emotion.

What age is this? I'm 23, I'm 24. 24, 25. So when did football end for you? Football in my senior year in college. Where'd you go to college? I went to the University of Northern Colorado, the later half of my career.

I started at Colorado, got suspended, kicked out of school, went to jail, being a moron, and then I transferred to the University of Northern Colorado, and then I played there. And you still thought you were going to continue to play ball after college? That was realistic. Either that or play baseball. That was an opportunity that I would have. And are you married in college? I'm married all the way through college.

All the way through college. And then when you're done at college, are you 22? Are you 21? I'm a little older. I'm 23. So you were 23 when college ended? Yeah. And then your wife left you as you were still in college or right got down with college?

A year later, year and a half later. So I'm 24, probably 25 if I tracked it back. I'd been working for a couple of years, been out in the real world. I tore my knee right before half time of my senior year. So I'm just backside. I'm a cornerback. I'm just backside, you know, and a guy cuts me. Yeah.

And so all of that, hopes, dreams, all of that just goes out the window. And you're struggling in that year to kind of what you were saying, finding your identity. So you're struggling with that transition that first year out of college. What am I going to do? Get a sales job? What am I going to do? I've been thinking about being a professional football player since all I can remember. Yeah.

And if I don't play football, I'm going to play baseball. Right. You know, we're going to go do something and then just the realization of knowing what. And there were, I wasn't mentally tough enough to be that guy looking back now. Yeah. There were a lot of things that that I wasn't good enough. I was athletically capable enough, but not in my mind. I wasn't.

I didn't really understand who I was and couldn't just be present in a lot of things that happened. So just all of that crashing down in that moment and then this realization that I don't really know who I am and this idea of identity. I've got to figure out what's real about who I am before I try to work at what to do. Let's not aim at what to do next. Let's just take a stop, a moment, and let's figure out. out, what does Jim really believe in? Yeah. Regardless of what anybody else on the planet thinks, what do I believe in?

And what am I willing to get up and move forward based on? Does that make sense? Yeah. Oh, yeah. I think that's what happens with a lot of guys in sports. And I only say sports because I play, I play a sport my whole life. Yeah. Guys work, first grade is how old, like eight years old, six, seven, eight years old, whatever you're all guessing here.

but you play a sport from a very early age. So like for me, for instance, you start at seven, eight years old. And you train basically to, I was an older guy too, until 23, right? 23 minus 8, what is that, 15 years? You train 15 years to go after one goal or one dream, right, being an NFL player. And when the reality sets in that, the average career in the NFL is three years. You train 15 years of your entire life for a career that lasts, on average, three years.

I've been very fortunate to, I'm in my seventh right now. On kind of the quote unquote back into my career. Yeah. Not knowing when it'll end. And fortunately, it's always kind of sunk in with me that I got to find a transition point. Because when it's taken away from you, you do go through this transitional period of what in the, you know, what do I do next? And if you don't pivot and know and are strong and kind of your identity with something,

that's where guys can slip into like clinical depression or something that they don't know. Like, what am I going to be a sales guy? Because we think as athletes, we're going to either pinnacle or, oh, what am I going to be a sales guy? There's nothing that you're all in on this one goal that you live, knock on wood. Hopefully we all live to like 90, right? We haven't even lived one third of our life. and this goal we've trained for for 15 years is going to be gone whenever we get out of college and a lot of guys struggle when that happens

or in the NFL when a lot of guys, you see guys that go bankrupt within five years because they struggle figuring out their identity. And it's interesting to me that you were in that period for a year where you didn't make it to the league. And I'm just assuming, like Jim and I just met like 20 minutes ago, just assuming that that stuff kind of played a role into your wife leaving, right?

No question. No question. And then you're sitting there in your darkest time and some damn movie sits and clicks with you at some point. Yeah, 100%. I think that's like I always get very interested with guys, man, because the mentality is what matters in those periods of time because, yeah, I'm a football player now, but when that's done, am I capable?

That's why guys have to dabble in what might interest them because now they're going to slip into something that is not good. If you, if at a certain point, your athletic career will end. Yeah. At a certain, to be certain point. Yes. And it does for everybody, whether it's 15 years or two. You're going to retire either in high school, we know that, retire in college.

Right. We know that that's happening. This is, this is where I never, I never taught Rich Froning one thing about CrossFit. He was a, he's a multiple games champion, had that dialed in where, where Rich had me. Eight time, right? Yeah, total between the individual and team. I mean, when it comes to that world, that's the guy. What was valuable working through the mayhem mindset process,

what we call the mayhem mindset process now was, well, CrossFit is not his identity. It's what he does. And so I know that at a certain point, that's going to end. So what am I aiming at after that? Right. And I need to start to create that thought process and plan for that in the future. And if professional football is all,

you are, you're in trouble. Because it's going to come to an end at certain point. Yes. And so that was the space that I found myself in. And then what I really realized was that I had to separate this idea of identity from what I do. And in the culture we live in, that gets really blurred. Okay. So I call it, you know, I want to, I don't, I'm not a traditional mindset, rah, rah, motivational guy.

That's not at all what I do. Right. My responsibility is to really, because of what I went through, I created a process for somebody to sit down and really decide who they were and what they believed in. What made you start creating that process? Now, I know that moment you decided, okay, I got to get my shit together and I'm immediately taking accountability for literally everything that's happened in my life. How do you start to figure out a process, right? And then from that process, we'll get into how you started to put together a formula to help other people. what I heard Maximus say. He stated what his purpose was, so I heard it. He was clear about who

he was and what his purpose was on the planet. Then he talked about what he believed in, which was values or beliefs or however you want to call it, first principles. And then he said, this is what I'm going to do. This is who I am. This is what I believe. And either in this life or the next life, I'm going to have my revenge. You know, that's kind of how he phrased it. So I said, okay, wait a second. Let me figure out what purpose is. Let's create a list of authentic beliefs in my life that I really believe in, that are mine. And then I'm going to hold myself accountable by writing myself a mission statement. Now what I call your I am, which is a purpose statement, your I believe, which is this idea of whatever it is you believe in, and then what you're going to

do to hold yourself accountable. And so I went through six months worth of just beginning to ride. All right, well, why in the hell am I on this planet? Because it's sure isn't play football because that ain't happening yeah so so that's that's something that i that's that's something that i that i thought it was going to do but that's not the same as really what i believe in i need to separate that out and it's not the same as what i feel whatever these things are that i'm supposed to believe in have to be big rocks they have to be immovable in my life right regardless of how i feel there are things i'm supposed to anchor to so so so if i believe in family well what what is the real definition of that you know what do i

And so I went through a process of really reaching out and defining this idea of values that represented my strengths, my weaknesses, and then my goals. If you don't mind sharing, could you give examples that you were writing in this initial period that you were going to kind of go after, I guess, until you got to the point it's where it's like, hey, I found this system that you have an experience label with you now to kind of attract people to. to want to, you know, follow your stuff. Yeah, when I started out, what is now kind of 11 challenges in a process, I don't tell anybody what to believe. That's not my job. Right. You believe whatever it is you want to believe.

Okay. But I am asking you to be able to defend it to yourself. If it's not in language, it's not a tool. Right. Think about it on the football field. You could say a bunch, right? You could call a coverage. And if you don't know what that is, that language specifically,

You can't do it. Right. You can't. Cross fits the same way. You know what an AMRAP is, you're in trouble. So if you don't have language for your beliefs and it's not something that you can really actively communicate, it's not really real, man. Right. Your choices and decisions are going to be based mostly on momentum or emotion.

There's nothing wrong with momentum and there's nothing wrong with emotion. That's a fire starter, but it's not sustainable fuel. Right. We're going to find ourselves in places where our emotions betray us. Absolutely. And that happens to everybody. Yeah. So, and that's the way we're designed, by the way.

Right. We feel first. That's the first part of our brain that kicks in, and then we think second. So understanding that, acknowledging it. So I went through a process of separating my emotions from what I believed. And so now I call it your B, capital B, values, talents, and purpose. I want you to be able to have some sort of idea about what that means and then be able to say it. Right.

So that it's authentic. authentic. Don't BS me. And then you make yourself accountable by making the invisible, like, heard and visible. I wrote a code for my life, literally. I called it the Strength and Honor Code after what Maximus said. I had a tattoo artist draw me a crest. I tattooed it on my arm,

and every decision was filtered from that point on through the Strength and Honor Code. It was not for anybody, and I could quote it. My name is, this is who I am. This is what I believe. this is what I believe in, fight, work, hope, faith team, family, excellence, purpose, responsibility, love, and freedom, all clearly defined. I said it fast and it doesn't mean anything to you, but it's very profound in my life. Yeah.

And then an I will statement or a mission statement that represented me, and then it was boiled down to something on my arm so I could look down and say, Jim, is there any strength and honor in that? Meaning what I believe is purpose, what I believe are my values, and what I'm said I'm going to do, that was very well thought out and in language. Right. But it gave me a fighting chance now to move my life forward. Instead of momentum and emotion, I knew who the hell I was and I could apply it if I wanted to.

Right. So instead of being a guy who was kind of foggy and wasn't real clear about what I believed, I was a dude who really knew and was accountable. So my challenge now was a little bit different than a lot of people's. It was would I and will I live the way I said I would believe. instead of staying in the state of confusion. Right. Staying in that state of emotion.

And that's what I realized too. I thought, before we started working together, I thought I was a pretty defined guy. You know, I know what I believe in. I know what my values are. I know. And I thought, which most of us do as confident, you know, confident people who I try to do the right things,

I think I know a lot about life than a lot of people do. Right. Until I started going into this process and started to realize, just like I lift weights and I flex these muscles with every single rep. Now I'm flexing my mental muscles and my identity, you know, because, you know, when you guys are talking about, okay, ball is over, that's your darkest hour. That's when you realize, that's when you realize, okay, this is the darkest hour. Who am I? Am I enough? Because that's what we always talked about. You know, first time we sat down, we pretty much talked. In essence, this process is your greatest

moment of opportunity or your darkest hour, am I enough? And for me as an athlete, still continuing to compete. I am just as much focused on at my greatest moment of opportunity because I haven't had a lot of horrible things happen to me. I haven't been down and we're not talking clinical depression in my case. We're talking, you know, I want to get better and we're talking about winning multiple world titles. We're talking about going down as one of the greatest of all time. I want to be able to, I want to be able to pull that out of me. And I realize after going through this process, the hurdles I've had to go through, this small mind, the small thinking that I've had to go through, the things that have been holding me back,

as well as the things that are going to propel me forward. So at your greatest moment of opportunity, you can say, yes, I am enough. Let's go get that. Let's go take that. Yeah. Yeah. You guys are talking about, like, being very clear in who you believe and how you're defining these characteristics of yourself.

Now, when you were doing this, right, it sounds awesome. And I'm talking from a point of people listening right now that are like, okay, it's going to be as simple as being very clear in writing shit down, which you should. You should write shit down. When you make the invisible visible, it's a lot more powerful because you're putting it out in the universe. Creative power in writing. Right. And now you're doing this from step one, the beginning, right? Now you're 51. You're proven. You've got these clients. But in the beginning, you're writing this shit out, right? Like me, I've said this before on another podcast,

like, okay, you want to write, I want to be a, I am a pro-bow linebacker, or what does a pro-linebacker do on a daily basis? And I'm writing pro-linebacker. Or when I was undrafted, it's like, be a starter on the Washington Redskins. You're getting clear, but you have doubt at the same time. So here's the key. Here's the key

in what we're doing here. And this is what happened to me, and this is very fundamental to this being something that matters and works. Right. I'm not talking about what you're going to do. Okay. The task or the emotion. I want to separate that out.

Be a pro bowl linebacker is that goal that you're aiming at and it's valid. Prior to thinking about that, I really want to take you back to really understanding identity. What is it inside you that ability and or the right to be that pro bowl linebacker? To get to the end result. Right. Gotcha. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I want to go all the way back to what's purpose in your life. and I want to define that in a word. Got you.

And then I want to talk about values. I want to create a platform of strength to operate from so that whatever it is you decide to do, you're bringing identity to it. Right. Not just the goal. There's nothing wrong with the goal. We've got to have them.

Yes. And we've got to put that in language. That's really important. But so many people chase the do in our culture. Right. Let me try this. Oh, that didn't work. Well, let me try this.

Oh, I didn't work. Let me try this. Well, that didn't work. Hold on. Right. I want you to explain the vulnerable kind of scary side when you do write these big-ass goals in mind, right? And then it's like, okay, Jim, in the very beginning now, you're writing this huge goal and you're trying to carry it out. And you still have some vulnerability thinking, am I worth telling this to people?

You presumably had some kind of doubt when you're writing this in real. Like, I'm going to be one of the best to do it. Right. There's still something in you when you are writing the purpose and the characteristics and all this stuff that's like, why do you deserve that? You still have a little anxiety to talk about it out loud because you know you're doing it because you need to, but telling it to other people and talking about it front of other people and doing it in a way, it's where it's like, man, are they doubting me? You know what I mean? For sure. You have that stuff in the beginning.

Now it's like we're proven dudes, right? Right. And you can kind of talk about it easier. But in the beginning, you're going to have doubt in things. thinking what makes me deserve this in mind, right? So what Michael said, the whole idea in my heart started from the question. What I wanted to do was I wanted to strip myself all the way of everything. I wanted to put myself in Maximus's position.

If you watch the movie, right, everything had been taken to him. He was a general, had been taken from him. His wife was killed. He's in this spot where he's a slave. And the only reason why he's fighting is for what he believed in. that it felt good, not that he was respected. He wasn't any of those things. Right.

It was just only about who he was as a man. One of the goat movies. Right. For sure. And so I wanted to put myself in that spot. And what I realized was, well, what was the one question that kept coming from my heart? Well, the one question was, am I enough? Am I just an effing loser now?

Yeah. And that happens. It happens for sure. It's important for people to know that that happens. It happens to everybody. And it happens all the time. That's to be human. it's emotional.

And if it hasn't happened, it is the inevitable if you are not clearly defined. Yes. You know, as, because I was, so we haven't really talked about

fighting goals. We haven't talked about at all. Big goals. Honestly, I just want to figure out who I am. Right.

I'm a kid from High Ridge, Missouri. Missouri, you know, and now I've gotten this, this platform to be able to be who I am, and I'm, but I still am trying to figure it out

preemptively as a precaution because when fighting ends, I want to mitigate the risk of that darkest out. Yes. I want to mitigate the risk of if I lose my next three fights and I'm done, who am I, where am I going, what am I doing? Because you're going to struggle for a minute, man. What you're doing should have zero bearing on identity.

Exactly. Right. It shouldn't. In your greatest moment of opportunity or in the darkest hour, you're still the same dude. You still believe the same things. Let me take everything away from you that you have, you know and I don't know anything about you personally

I'm just saying let's take your money let's take your wife let's take your job let's put you in that spot and then you then tell me are the things that you believe in horse shit at that point or is it real right tell me what that is and so here I am face down depressed and I'm like man I if I'm gonna get up and come forward it's got to be real or what's it worth and so the point of the process is to put you at least mentally in a space where we where we separate

to do. I don't care about your job. I don't care about your goals initially. I don't want to know about any of that. Really what I want you to do was just tell me who you are and what you believe. And let's come up with that idea first. Yeah. It's just like the fundamental. What position? Linebacker. Linebackers. Read your keys, man. What I need you to do is read your keys for your life. Right. That's what I want you to be able to do before the snap of the ball, how intelligent you are. Before the do, are you intelligent and well-versed and have language for your life? And when you say have language, you're talking about, you're talking, this is where writing stuff down and comes into play. 100%.

Because I truly, like, I love this stuff. And I want, I want people to have takeaways. Yeah. Right. Everybody listening. Like, when he's explaining this stuff, try and think about some shit in your own life. Yeah. And when he's talking about language and saying all these questions, like, maybe you're sitting in the car right now or listening to this pot or watching it at home.

I don't know. But, like, if you want to take this stuff away, I'm trying to ask all these questions so we can. give to you guys. Think about this. Let's think about your strongest beliefs. Let's just do it right here. Right now. Michael Chandler, name three core values in your life. Core values?

Strongest beliefs. Fight, family. Authenticity. Now, when I go into classrooms at a university or I talked in front of 300 doctors the other day, and I challenged them, name a core value in your life.

because we don't have this conversation this way in our culture. Mostly we're talking about motivation and we're looking at guys to motivate us, which is cool. There's nothing wrong with it, but you waste motivation if you don't know who you are. Motivation is a fantastic tool if you can apply it to who you are as a human being. But so many people are chasing motivation. I want to know who he is. Quiet, still outside of all the do.

I go into a classroom and I'll ask, You know, hey, somebody name a core value. And it gets super quiet. They don't really know what I'm talking about. So I'm going to try to describe it a couple of different ways. Because people are probably processing like, shit. For sure. I'm sitting here talking.

I'm like, man, I got to be able to name three if you asked me here in a second. You know what I mean? And it's the definition. I mean, we've worked so hard over the last couple weeks with these definitions. And I've changed the definitions 15 different times. And a lot of times, and that's why you talk about he went, fight, whole, take, all of his things. His definition is different. My definition of fight is probably different than you think it is.

My definition of authenticity is probably similar to what you think it might be, but the reasoning behind the definition all has to go back to my shortcomings mentally and emotionally from the scars of my past, from the things that have held me back. My authenticity isn't just so I can put my best foot forward and be my best self. Being authentic in my mind is overcoming the mental hurdles of the small-minded thinking of my past. therefore when I step into a room, I will have the courage to be authentic in front of people. And it all comes back to the shortcomings that I've had. There's what I believe in our design. There's all kinds of things talent-wise that are under design.

And then there's nurture in nature, how you were raised, you know, and what all that means. So we all arrive at this space with different kinds of environments being put through different things. And so it's important to make sure. that those words, whatever they are, whatever those belief systems are in your life, they're yours and you own them. These core values, right? Whatever the core values are. Whatever that is you say, and I don't care what it is, they need to represent your strengths.

They need to represent the emotional weaknesses in your life because we all got them. And then they need to represent goals or ideals in your life. So they're living and breathing and you can use them. So many times I go into a space where people, they've never thought about it, so they don't know what they are. so it's not really a tool and or I go into an environment

where they got these mission statements on the walls and they got all these core values but it's all horse shit and nobody really lives them and especially in a lot of corporate environments you can go into a locker room and there'll be some mission statement on the wall and nobody knows what it is or cares

it's not actual real philosophy what we're more concerned about is the process of the X's and O's which is important we need to to be excellent at that. Correct. But we need to come from some sort of philosophical base if we're going to be 100% of who we're created to be.

If I want the most out of you as an athlete, I need to care about who you are at the heart level and as a man and as your beliefs. And then I need that connected to process. And if I had that connected to process, then I got 11 dudes flying to the ball, understanding who they are and what they believe. Right. And then there's some sort of, if you know who you are and he knows who he is and everybody knows who they are, then we can find that space where our values overlap, and that's where

strength is. Or if a coach wants to know whether he wants you around, that's a nice question to start with. Because there's a lot of X's and O's guys who are physically capable, but they don't belong in the culture. You know what I mean? They're just not going to fit. I don't care how good you are. It doesn't really matter. You're not my guy. So understanding that about your life, not just football or what you're doing is important. How are you going to respond to your girlfriend how you can respond to your wife um that filter having a filter you know i think that's one of the biggest things too having a filter to live every single every single scenario that you come into every single interaction every single relationship there's a there is a inherent filter that you now

have through the practicing of being able to filter all of these every single scenario through these core about through your core values because when these bad things happen it's like what do they say like or even good things like a five second rule everything happens yeah there's like a There's like a moment your brain has that's going to make a decision. And you're trying to create these things to where that's what you default to in these times of either success or, I guess, failure. So you write these core values and then what's next? So you're with me and Mike and we're figuring out our core values the next time we meet with you, what comes after these defined core values when we talk about it? So the whole entire process is one most importantly to get you to write.

Why write? It's not in language. It's not a tool. Love it. So I've got to get you to put who you are and what you believe on paper. If you're not disciplined enough to do some writing, it's not right for you. R-I-G-H-D. The process is not right for you.

So we need to be able to do that. We want to talk about negative emotions, negative themes, negative stories. And so we don't start by writing about core values. That comes at the very end of the process. Okay. What I want to do is put you through challenges one week at a time that, cause you to gain some new perspective about your life. That's the idea or the goal.

No different thing getting in the gym and working the different muscles and changing up how you're doing that to strengthen your body. What's an example of something you put them through? Each one of the challenges requires you to be able to go out into your week and keep this idea front of mind. So one of them I call the matrix and I teach something called the system. feel, filter, think, flow. It's pretty simple.

It's how our bodies work. Olympic brain fires, filter. I don't know if you got one. That's this idea of building the system, poor value system, then being able to think really clearly. Can I get you to be a critical thinker? Or are you just running all over the place?

We all know that person, right? Every choice and decisions based on emotion. Yeah. So I want you to go out into your week and really recognize if you're making some choices and decisions based on values or if you're mostly over there in emotion. And each one of the challenges has a component like that.

And the idea is after 11 weeks, and if I can get you a little bit off balance and I can get you to write a little bit about who you are and what you believe, then we've got this thread that goes all the way through the challenges and some writing where we can go back into it and we can begin to discover what it is you really believe based on what you've written.

So you're having, correct me if I'm wrong, you're having them right about these experiences that are happening, whether good or bad. You're just kind of jotting them down. You're kind of journaling them. Yeah. And those first couple weeks, too, were very eye-opening. Like, was the first week, the power of B? Yeah, the three Bs.

Be in spite of what other people think. Be in spite of emotion and be present. That first week for me, the amount of times I wrote down how I was not present or how I knew the week before I was not being present. compared to the next week with my son, with my wife, with conversations being present here in this podcast, or even being in spite of emotions or being in spite of what other people think. I caught myself almost taking more leaps of faith to do things outside of what I would have normally did because I wasn't worried about what people were thinking as much, or I wasn't worried about, you know,

what people were thinking or what the negative emotions might have been or how emotion was driving me, rather than just being me. Yeah, because you're kind of like writing this accountability. And you're like, oh, shit, I'm not. It's like something as simple as like, okay, you think you're healthy, Will. For the next week, literally write down everything you eat. And that's something simple. And you, I've done this before and you realize like, shit, I'm not really sticking to the things I've talked about doing.

Right. Because you see all these small little slipups along the way because you're journaling and you're like, shit. Yeah, and you can mark them up. Yeah. And then you kind of give them back to them and you're kind of wanting to erase. something so, you know, if we sat down, she doesn't want to see it. If we sat down, this process is not for somebody, and I don't say this in any sort of way to be negative. I'm not a, I'm not a therapist. I'm not a licensed counselor. I'm not any of those kind of

guys. Yeah. Um, this and the process is not some for somebody who needs that. It, it needs to be somebody who has some awareness about who they are and really is trying to get next level. Self awareness. Trying to, just trying to stretch yourself a little bit and get detailed about your life. That's what's sharpen. We want to sharpen things. And so, so the three Bs like Michael just explained, well, if we sat down and we could in two hours, we could have created a list of really authentic values that really meant something to him. But if we don't create some tools and we don't look for the spaces to how to use them, number one, and we don't look for the spaces where there are challenges or opportunities, then it's not worth anything in the end. And it ends up just being something

you wrote on a wall. We end up in the space where lots of people are in the culture where they say this is what they believe, but it's not really practical. So we want to create mindset tools, actual tools, so that you can put who you are and what you believe in motion. Your value system should be a force multiplier in your life. It shouldn't be a safety net. Yeah. I'm interested in dudes who can play offense. Not that there's nothing wrong defense. I like defense. But you know what I mean. No, I get you. You know what I mean. We want to be able to carry the weight for the people that we love. I want to stand in the gap for the people that I'm committed to being there for.

I want to make that sacrifice. But I also want to stay on track regarding my emotions and the things that I know that will easily distract me. If I don't have this, Jim Hensel's, I'm a screw up. I guarantee you. And when you say spaces, you mean like these hurdles that come along throughout your week? Sure. Like, is that what you mean by spaces if we don't find the space? to implement these core values that we're going to default to?

Are those the things you're talking about? We've got to make them working tools. Got you. It's got to be language and it's got to be something that we know how to put into action on just something we write on a wall. When those moments are happening. Yeah. Let me give you an example in the very beginning.

After I went through all that, that emotion and struggle and my wife leaves, I made a commitment. Now, listen, this is not about what you believe or you believe or anybody else leaves. I'm talking about what I believe and how I apply. it to my life. Sure. And how I wanted to own it. So people can judge me however

when they're going to judge me and I don't care. Don't give it. I want that for you too. Yeah. In my greatest moment of opportunity, darkest hour, I need to know who the hell I am.

Yeah. So in that space back in the day, I decided I wasn't going to have sex with single moms based on my code. Whether you believe that or not, that's just why I decided. I'm going to be, I'm single right now.

And I'm going to, I'm going to come home and take care of these little girls because that's what I'm supposed to do. And I'm going to have to get this right because my mindset is going to get me in a space where, you know, I'm going to be paying attention to chasing tail instead of coming home and taking care of these kids. That was really real for me in that space at that point of my life. As a bachelor, you know, late 20s, early 30s. And so I decided, based on my code, that's not what I was going to do. If it's a single mom and I could take advantage of that, I'm not going to. That's not what I'm going to do. And, and so,

So that was a rule I set for myself based on my code. So many, many times during those years, and I got myself, and I won't tell the whole story, but I got myself in all kinds of spots where, you know, like, man, you can't be here, bro. Like, that's against the code. There is no strength and honor in what you're saying. You're not going to take advantage of that right now. Yeah. That's not somebody, according to your code, that you believe.

I don't want that done to me as a single dad out there trying to take care of kids, fighting and battling for that. and that's not what I'm going to do as a man. That's just not a choice. Even though my emotions say, let's get into this. My values say, hey, no, no, no, let's not take advantage of that right now. And it kept me on a track, especially relationship-wise, early in those days, that it allowed me to stay on course and make choices and decisions

that were based on my values, not just my emotions. That's a simple place that I used it early, and now 20 years later, it's grown and developed and means other things. But that's where I started and that's where I am now. That's how practical it was to me in that day. Is there any strength and honor in that, Jim? Well, obviously my value system says no, but my emotions say, hell yeah, get into that.

What are you going to do? You're going to be the man who said you live by what you believed, or are you going to allow that motion and that momentum to put you in a space? At least what I had at that moment was a fighting chance. Right. because I had some language in my life. I wasn't going to get into it the next day and be like, man, I really wish I wouldn't have done that. And I found myself in positions where it really could have destroyed my life if I would allow my emotions to run away in those moments.

Yeah. So we want to. I appreciate you being vulnerable like that. Well, I mean, it's part of the story, right? It's 100% part of the story. Yeah, strong, yes. I'm in a space where I really don't, I really don't care. And I want you to be in that space.

I want you to care. I want it to be important to you. But I also want you to be in a space where you know who you are regardless. Confident in who you are. Your choices and decisions are locked in to who you are and what you believe. And then the important people around you, those values overlap. And you can make choices and decisions together. My wife and I can come together and who she is and who she be in my game, values, talents and purpose, are a little bit different than mine.

But our values overlap. And in that space, man, we do good work there together. Right. And those people who you don't necessarily align with, you're so confident in who you're, are. It's like you might explain it once, but you don't feel like you have to explain yourself like, okay, man. Like, no, and I'm not offended. Right. Everybody gets to kind of believe who they are. That's the beautiful thing about who we are and where we're at as free individuals. Yeah. Everybody gets to do that. And I want everybody to, to be able to use that

freedom. It's important. But the, but the, but I think the interesting thing to note here is that we, you want to, you want everybody to express what they, who they be and stand up for what they believe in, but so many people, especially this day and age, are not at all clearly defined in what they truly believe. And that's why it is the age old quote of believe in something or your fault for anything. Right. So you know exactly what you believe in, what your strength and honor code is, what exactly who you be so that you can filter all of that in everything that you do. And I think that's where that's where the process has helped me so much. I mean, like I said, I felt like I was more defined than most.

And that's why you said it's not, this is not for somebody who's a thousand percent completely lost necessarily. You can be, you can have it all together. I feel like I have had it all together, right? Yeah. But I want to take it to the next level. I want to go even more on the offense. And I don't by any means have it all together.

But I was not in a dark, dark space. Right. But I also was so far away from what God has designed me to be. So far away from the, the values, the talents and the purpose that God has designed in my heart and all my life. And now I feel like I'm starting to scratch that service even more. And now I can see it more than I ever had in my entire life. Hopefully I didn't say it wrong.

I want to be clear. There's nothing wrong with counseling. There's nothing wrong with the psychologist. There's nothing wrong with any of that. And that's important. And it's an important part of our culture. And people should utilize that as they need it. This doesn't replace that.

Okay. You know what I mean? Yes. Absolutely. I need somebody who has some self-awareness and is actually really to do some hard work. Because it's hard. It's hard work. Yeah.

If you don't want to help yourself, it's just going to be hard as shit to, you know, work with somebody like you or have somebody there that wants to hold you accountable. But if you truly can't figure out how to hold yourself accountable, then you're not going to, you can't be worked on that well yet. Something I really, I really admire about Michael is that he's a, he's a faith guy. That's an important, it's an important part of his life. It's key and it's foundational in who he is and what he believes. Okay. All right. So if that is true, then can you really clearly define that and connect that to something that's very real?

And it's something that you're actively practically using in your life. Or is it oversimplified ideology? Because I was a faith guy back in the day who was just spouting off words that meant nothing to me. And I didn't really live it out. I didn't know how to live it out. And it was because somebody else said it, but I didn't own any of it. So it really kind of made me more of a hypocrite. And it certainly wasn't a forced multiplier in my life.

Right. You just had some verses like memorized the kind of recall on and talk about. Right. So when we address this idea, I didn't tell him the faith was important. He just said it was. Okay. Now define that. What does that really mean in your life?

And is it something that you're actually using in your life? And then past that, what are the other values in your life? You know, what are the other things that if you're telling me, and Michael would say that face a foundational strength value in his life, okay, if that's the case, then what are the other things in your life that make that meaningful? Right. What are the other values? And how does that, how does this idea of faith in your life, how do you use it in the weaknesses in your life? And then how does it affect your future? or are you just going to quote some scripture at me?

It doesn't really mean a whole lot. Right. And then you're just going to roll out of here. And that I'm not down with, you know? Go ahead. Yeah, I was going to say, now you have all of this stuff clearly defined. You have it in language. People, you start to figure out, you're starting to learn a lot more about yourself, right?

And now when you have all these tools and you have all of this kind of standard created, do you repetitively constantly measure it week in and week out right or when you go through a fight or whoever you're working with like or rich like in workouts or if you're trying to hit these measurables are you looking at that are you looking at results a lot from this

language that you've written down or no matter what the result is you're still always trying to live in those in this code that you've written in language and being clear you know what I mean so an example say you don't hit something or say you lose a title fight what's the next mentoring session look like

yeah that's a great question the goal in the end is to spend all this time going through these mental challenges and creating the language and then arriving at the last part of this process where you condense it down to single words that are

that mean all of that that mean everything that you've just written your code write your own code Got you. So that you know what it is. The Strength and Honor Code, meaning my purpose statement, my name is James Dean Hensel. I'm a son of God.

I'm a challenger, exorter, and an encourager. I will run to the battle for in the battle I find peace. I'm the father of Taylor and Brittany Daughters of Promise. It means something. I'm the husband of Kristen Hensel, F.G. That really means something. There's this statement that I can say quickly that is extremely impactful in my life.

and then I can go through the core values. If you get me started talking about the core values, we'll be here for two days. That's language that I know about me and how to use it in my life. And you bring him to a few words. And you bring them down, well, bring it down to fight. Fights in my core values.

It's in his too. He just defines it different. Okay. He just defines it different and what it means to him is a little bit different than what it means to me. So we bring it all the way back

to a core value with authentic language that means something, Not the dictionary, not what your dad said or your pastor said or any those people, but what you believe. And then a mission statement, I call it your I will. I can do it in 30 seconds, just like Maximus did. In my greatest moment of opportunity, darkest hour, I sure as hell know who I am. That no one can ever take away from me. So we want to put it into that format so that you can quickly, I mean, if I literally said to you right now,

we'll define yourself. Tell me purpose, tell me values, and then tell me how you, you know, Tell me in language what you're going to do with it. Could you do it in 30 seconds or less? I know that's not fair. Right. But these are what your clients. These are what your people you work with.

This is the goal. This is the goal to get to. That's the goal. Now once you have that goal, now how do you use it and how do you act? How do you grow it? How do you grow it? How do you put it to work? Yeah.

How do you put it to be breathing and growing at all times? What it meant family, my definition of family meant one thing prior to being married. it meant one thing after being divorced. It meant the next thing after being a father. And now I'm looking at grandkids here in the future probably. And it's been living, breathing, and growing in my life. At least once a year, I'm coming back to redefining and updating and deciding what's valuable about the things I believe in. Now when you say you're redefining and updating, I know you can talk about your core values and stuff like that.

Are you also alluding to goals? and big, big stuff that's kind of, for sure. That makes you uncomfortable. For sure. So in the value system, we have what we call strength values. These are big rocks. Okay. Big things that I know probably don't change very much.

Other than updating, I've got this idea of weakness values. These are values that address my limitations, the stories in my life that are negative. So that's important. For me, I was a worrier, and the word hope is extremely meaningful to me in the way that I've defined it. So that's a big deal to me. I worked hard to go from being a warrior who was left, who didn't do what he thought he would do in life to being a very hopeful person. And it took fighting for it.

Yes. The next kind of an ideal or value I call an ideal value. And those are more connected to goals. And those changed for me every year. Right. This year I talked about freedom in a big way. I took this whole entire year to define what freedom means to me. It's something I've been reading about, studying about, connecting to my life.

So that when this year ends, I'm going to have a really good idea about what freedom means to me. Do you, are you, it is October now. How are you feeling about freedom right now? It's huge. I mean, I've thought about it from what it means as a country. What I believe as, well, the first thing is, I think we have a freedom problem and that people don't know how to be free.

Okay. And that freedom destroys us. We're just, we don't know how to operate and live inside of that. I see people who have been given this right to make choices and decisions and, and a lot people do really well with it and a lot of people don't so for me how do i stay connected inside of freedom how do i maximize freedom i thought about at a government level and what i believe about that and a lot of people go there immediately i thought about what it means in my finances so i can get ahead and be where i want to be and what i want to do i thought about it as it relates to

my relationships and then i walked it all the way down to in the morning when i get out of bed your process it will actually actually even deeper am i being influenced immediately or am I an influencer? If I put my feet on the floor, what I realized was as soon as I went to social media, as soon as I went to email, that's not nefarious, it's not bad, but all of a sudden I am now following that influence

instead of having some space for me to be free, for my feet to hit the ground and be free. I'm going to go outside, and I'm going to shoot my bow for 30 minutes and just be quiet and be okay in the quiet so that when I connect to my day and the things that I think are valuable and purposeful, I'm doing it as an influencer.

I'm taking it in the way that I want to take it. And I think here's a huge mistake inside of freedom that most of us and many of us would say, if we're honest, holy smokes. There's no space to really, really be influencing and free. So that's how deep I've thought about it. I like that. What is something that you've written down? What is it called idea, idea goal or idea?

Yeah, ideal values. Ideal values. What's like a goal you've written down? Wait, an ideal value? Yeah, like a goal when he talks about to begin. A want weakness or a want value. I think for me, see, see, the beautiful thing about this is say a word that I'm about to say right now might seem different, but because of the shortcomings of my past. Like because a want value for me, I think was, excuse me, we're at the process right now where I think I have.

We're doing this right now. He's actually in this process. And yesterday we went through a couple different definitions. I have three different definitions of the word reliability or stability. You know, for me, the biggest deterrent in my life has been other people's expectations or not believing in myself enough or playing small. So the ideas of my want value of being authentic, the want value of being free. And just for me, just being free to know that there was a.

there was an almighty God that created me in his image. And since I was born, I have not been living free. I have not been, there has been numerous times in my life where I've seen glimpses of it and glimmers of it. And those are some of the greatest moments of my life. A couple of fights ago against Goetiyamauchi, which you guys didn't see the fight. But in that moment, I felt the most free I had ever been inside of that cage within my purpose, within my due, and being. close to 100% of who God designed me to be, but it only comes out in glimpses, you know. So being able to be defined and be able to give that important trade ads to the world.

But what is what is a one? Like what does that look like in a in a result form? And I don't, you guys might not even talk about a result form. No. No. Well, for sure. But we don't we don't have a lot of goals. Hey, by the end, you know, in 2020, I'm going to do this. and no I honestly it's all about me who is michael chanler going to be who is it's all about intention well it's it's it's identity yeah it's identity and one of the greatest things that you said too is is you know um because we talked about because one of my biggest fears and one of the things that has helped me back is sometimes and not that which this is the cool thing about our process we don't do quotes and we don't do scripture right right you faith guy christian but i was not going to do this process based upon this scripture or that scripture or this quote love zigzigler i love

tony robbins love the but i'm i'm not going to use these different quotes right because i'm that's where i always default to so we had to we had to put the kabash on that just for this process yeah just for the game just for the game then when we get done then we can continue to move into that but um for me playing small you know you playing small doesn't do anybody a favor there's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people don't feel insecure around you and my whole entire life. I have been afraid to be the best at something for the fear of how it may affect you negatively or how it may affect you negatively or how you might not feel great about yourself because of how dominant I just was. Sounds a little bit crazy because I've been in hand-to-hand combat since I was 14 years.

My goal is to go out there and break somebody and hurt somebody now in a cage in front of millions of people. So for me, that has always been one of my things, is not, not coming off too cocky. And one of the most profound things that you said to me in this, he said, well, the antidote to cockiness is being defined. There's nothing wrong with being defined,

even though when you sit there and you say, I am James Dean Hensel, I am this, this, this, this, and if there was 100 people sitting here, they'd be like, man,

that's a little bit weird. This guy, because confidence breeds insecurity. Like, right? We are sometimes afraid to be around somebody who is that confident, you know? And I think that's a problem with, with society these days we look at these people who are who are so defined and they're so confident in themselves

that we shrink and and i believe the human spirit was was created for so much more that we were all designed to be put on this earth to be over overwhelmingly being able to achieve abundantly and overwhelmingly more than we ever could have thought or imagine and that's always been kind of one of one of my things is being afraid to be too successful around people for fear of what it may make them feel like. Because of the way you were raised. Because of those things. Goals come next.

Goals are important. What we're working out here is identity. Correct. Correct. I'm saying we have identity taken care of. When do goals come in? Next. So now we want to take whatever it is that you say you want to do.

Yes. Whatever it is that you're the task, task, job, emotion, whatever that is that you want to make happen in your life. What I care about is that you've formulated this platform of strength so that we can connect to that in an authentic way. Right. And now I'm asking the question, what are these goals that have happened for what are these goals in 2019? Like for me, for an example for me, a goal with busting with the boys, not even bustle with the boys, but something I looked at in my journal was that I was going to be one of the first players slash coaches because at this point in time I knew my. transition point was when I'm done with football, get into coaching. But when I was looking back

in my journal, it was be one of the first players slash coach to have a podcast with a million all-time downloads, right? So now I start with the end in mind and kind of backtrack on what that looks like in a formulated process for who I'm surrounding myself with, what we believe, like what I believe, how we're going to get there, taking those steps. But starting with the end in mind, what are some of those results? Okay, let's talk about it. ends in mind now that you've built a strong foundation because I love I love how you're putting that because you're giving me a whole perspective on being intentional with who you're defining yourself as now we've we're learning to define ourselves based on this conversation now what can people do

to have these goals that you're going to look at be kind of scared to go after right but how you you stay intentional on that process to get there let's talk about two ways first let's talk because I want to speak specifically about you okay and I want to talk about Michael real quick. All the things that he's doing as a fighter, training, eating right, people he surrounds himself, all that's super important. Let's narrow it all the way to the moment, and we've all seen it on pay-per-view when he's walking from the tunnel, the music's playing, and he's stepping in the cage. And in the culture that we live in, there's no bigger moment. Correct. 100%. It's man versus man. Heart starts beating a little more. Somebody's going down in that moment. So those two,

men or women, for that matter, have put them in a position where for sure in front of the world, someone's going to be embarrassed. Yes. Or someone's at least going to be seen as the loser. Yes. And lots of people in our culture want to avoid that. He doesn't want to avoid that. In his design, there's this idea of tenacious is the word he used, a competitor, that kind of pours out of him.

And so he was really kind of born to be in that space. And that's not everybody, man. It's just not. Yeah. That's not every. Like it factor. He's in a, what is it? I don't know, what's a percentage?

Half a percent of the people on the planet that will go into a cage and do that? Probably. It's not me. Yeah, not a lot. Yeah, smaller than that. Smaller than that. It's not me. So we have 11 guys on a team.

Right. And it's like there's a 1%, I don't know, a weird number, but it's even smaller with the UFC dudes. Or, sorry, not UFC, MMA. Right. No disrespect. So, so he's been, he has that innate ability inside him and inside him mentally. And it's actually a talent. He's been given it.

It's something that he didn't really work. He's worked to. cultivate it and craft it and get better at it, creating some mindset tools, but it's actually in him. We want to discover that. We call that purpose. I want to know what that is purpose in your life. You've experienced it. You're a limited group of people who can be on the field in the NFL and make that happen. And you don't really have to try. I'm not saying you haven't worked hard at the X's and O's and you haven't worked at mindset skills, but it kind of pours out of you. You're either a competitor and you can get off the block and you can make the tackle

or you can't. Right. And they'll find somebody who can if you can't. Yeah. So this is the understanding. What I care about is that when he goes to train every day, he remembers his identity. Whatever his goals is for the day, if he's wrestling, if he's doing jiu-jitsu that day, whatever he's got going on that day, that he brings the authentic version of who he is in his belief system into that space.

Right. So that he's operating from that position of strength. And what I really care about is whatever's going through his mind. because there's something going through his mind when he goes from the tunnel to the cage, that that's way connected to his identity. Because I don't know whether he's going to win or lose. I don't know.

Yeah, for sure. That's not written. For sure. But what we want to be in opportunity and adversity is authentic. And you make sure, you're somebody who makes sure he stays that authentic self. 100%. In those moments from the walk from the tunnel to the cage. Right.

And when he's in the cage. Yeah. That's what you are there for most. Now, I'm asking you, what are your, what's your individual goal as a fighter to allow him to say, hey, these are things I'm also wanting as we're working on being intentional in these moments, right? He's not there to be a raw, right? Remember, three-time, three-time defending champ, right? Or all these chasing world titles, he's not rah-rah.

Hey, remember, these are the goals, these are the goals. He's talking about being intentional in these moments. But what are some Michael Chandler goals that you're laying in bed at night and think, this is what I want to accomplish either this week this month or in fighting. I mean, I actually, I mean, don't mistake this process. This process is not about the goals. Right. I know, yes.

Okay. But for me, for me, for me, honestly, mine has all been, I've never lost to a man inside of a cage. I've only lost to myself. That's true. I've never, I've never, I've never lost a world title that wasn't my doing, you know. have you always thought that way though your first fights your first loss you truly felt

I didn't lose this fight like there back then you're saying there wasn't an eagle party that's like no this no back no back then because back then when I lost my first fight I went I went into a bad spot I went I lost three fights in a row when 688 days without winning oh yeah yeah yeah I lost Eddie Alvarez remember you know and then that's when I went from I went from the number three guy in the entire world Michael Chandler's He needs to go fight Benson and the UFC.

We think he's the best lightweight in the entire world to lose to Eddie Alvarez and then buying into all the media, buying into, we knew he wasn't as good as we thought he was. Or in my mind, the little guy inside me who was kind of been whispering the whole time, hey, you're not as good. You're not this good. Yeah. It's only a matter of time. Yeah. See what these people are saying.

Like, that's truly you. Hey, you're just a little guy from a little town. He should be working at Dobbs tires right now. Yeah. Like that's where you should be. Yes. with stuff on your shirt. Am I enough?

Am I enough? Am I enough? And that's, so back then it was, man, I lost to this guy. I need to go get this back. How am I going to beat this guy? How am I going to game planning? And to be able to cut the cut off the cage? How am I going to be able to have my hands up more?

How I'm going to be able to do this, this, this, this? When really the real battle was inside my soul, inside my mind, inside me. It was me. It was my shortcomings and my self-defeating prophecy of eventually. you're going to lose because you're not that good. You know, and that's... So for me, it's always outperforming my previous self. Obviously, I have not fought since Jim and I have worked together.

But I would... The way that I would see it is just for me to wake up every single morning when you talk about freedom, when you talk about having a clear definition, when I talk about just being able to walk around, more confident knowing that I know exactly who I'd be. So in every single interaction, I can do whatever I feel at liberty to do. We could walk it back to yesterday, in this spot in the process for him.

And we talked about three words yesterday at Starbucks in Cookville, Tennessee. And these aren't value words. Another part of the process is purpose words. And two things that we're identifying in Michael's life is, and they're the opposite sides of this spectrum in who he is. It's not just a personality trait. It's more of what pours out of him no matter where he is or what he's doing. One side of it was joy.

and the have fun, enjoy, get crazy, love that side of life, which if you're not that guy, it's robbing authenticity from you. And the other side was this tenacious competitive piece of who you are. And what was the word in the middle we talked about? Discipline. It's more goal-oriented. How do you go from having a great time? And your wife loves that part about you.

Your friends love that part about you. And if you're not doing that, you're not really authentic. And that's what sets me apart from other fighters as well. And that's what we've, you know, because I talked about over the last two years, how this, I've had the last two years have been the hardest two years of my life. And it has stolen my joy. And I've also been the most undisciplined in my entire life because I've had so much to do that it was impossible to get it all done. Therefore, A, I'm a failure every single day because I have 86 things to check off a list and it's going to be impossible.

So therefore, I stopped being disciplined in all the small things. I stopped being, I was disciplined in the big things. I kept my diet good. I kept my training good. Right. But it was the small things that continued to add up and add up and add up. And it made me a less effective human being. And it's the joy aspect.

I think my ability, my ability to be a leader and make a dent in the culture of men lies in my ability to mesh joy with my tenacity. When I can beat that crap out of somebody inside of a cage and then the next day, somebody meets me and like and they they think wow i didn't expect you to be this nice this loving this this humble this this happy because you just got done beating somebody helping in a cage and it and that's i can attest to that too first time i met michael chanelan i'm thinking like the same thing like this dude is super nice for being like a savage in the octagon and it means the same thing too yeah i did and it means everything because if if you're not authentic in the cage or at home with your wife and your son, son doesn't really care about tenacity.

No. That's not the piece right now at his age that connects you or the authentic piece of you that's really needed there. The joy piece is the piece that you've got to make sure that you're operating inside of. And that's really truly who you are. How we connect it to goals is this idea of discipline in his life. All right. So as a fighter, as a businessman, as a husband, as a football player, what's the force

multiplier idea in your life that connects you to goals in an authentic way. Right. We're going to bring the joy and we're going to bring the tenacity or this, he's a competitor, man. Into these areas and goals in each part of your life. So that it's authentic and so that it's really connected to your truth. And so that the goals, whether they are written down, which they should be written down, whether they are written down or whether they are just a byproduct of you knowing exactly

who you are, you're going to be closer to. the idea of that goal, that benchmark, that accomplishment, because you know exactly who you are in all of this. Okay. You get it? Yeah, no, I'm totally good. I'm truly, I'm trying to simplify as much as possible for people listening because I know people are going to be fired up about this stuff.

How much time are we at? One ten. An hour ten? Oh, fuck, we've been rolling, boys. We have rolling. We've been rolling. So, Jim, we're working, you're, we got, we are, we have defined who we are as people in our values, in our authenticity, and just we're confident in who we are. And I have

this written down on paper. What are the areas that you have written goals? So, for example, I work with Ben Newman. He's been a performance coach of mine that I've worked on. You know Ben. And it's like personal, professional. I'm just not thinking right now. There's like three different areas, right? And you're writing goals of what it looks like. So, my rookie year, I always allude to that, for instance. It was a professional. It was making impact on the Redskins roster, be a starting linebacker for the Washington Redskins. As a rookie, failed at that goal, right? And you're going to fail. You're going to constantly fail. And personal, it was reading my one-year Bible every day. And I don't know if it's,

it's like service. In service, it was have five speaking engagements to schools giving back. And I truly feared speaking in front of people. Right. But it was giving back through having a football camp. Welcome to football camp. Shout out to the boys. And having five speaking engagements, right? Right.

Based on these values that we've defined on who we are. Now we take them to these goals. What are these areas that you have me and Mike write down to where, hey, we're going to have goals in these areas? And then when you get to these benchmarks, whether you fail or get them, do you go to another goal in a benchmark, right? Sure. Or is it constantly living in who you are in these moments?

And it's more up to him to define what goals he wants in his life or in our life. So that's a great question. And what I think is when you authentically know who you are, the do, the task, the goal, the job, you do a better job of picking the right one. Got you. And that right one, we want to make sure that whatever Michael's doing, whatever that goal is, that job is, that task is actually connected to, in purpose, which is, and tenacity, and then this list of core values. For me, it's whatever I'm going to do, whatever my job is, whatever my task is, it's got to be connected to challenge, exhort, and courage,

because that's what pours out of me. It doesn't matter what I do. I'm coaching somebody. Right. Fight, work, hope, faith team, family, excellence, purpose, responsibility, love, and freedom. That's my filter. Here's how I feel about it. This is what I believe about it.

Now, here's what I'm going to do so that every time I aim at that nest task or next goal, whether it's at 50, 51 years old, what I'm trying to do physically, and I have those goals. And then what am I trying to do in business? And I have those goals. And the kind of parent that I want to be and the husband I want to be, I have those goals, that all of that stays on track. It becomes the guard rails that keeps me from either letting momentum in life get me in the space that's not connected to my purpose or my values or a motion that gets me off track. Gotcha. It's an entire filter.

So that whatever he's doing in jujitsu that day, whatever he's doing in wrestling that day, or wherever he's doing in striking that day, whatever he wants to do, I don't know, contractually, moving forward in your career. Those are all the goals, things that he's looking at. We just know for sure that's authentic. And it's just like your base.

Right. When you're lined up before the snap, where's that first foot going? Right. It's got to go the right way. It has to happen or you're behind. You're slow getting to where you're supposed to be. it's that kind of perspective.

I just want you to know what identity is so that when you make that move, you're headed in the right direction and you're headed there. I want you to be 100% of the person you were created to be when you arrive at the goal or whatever that is you decide you want to do. And I think that's my only goal right now. I have not thought about goals or looked at goals

or written down goals or written down anything, anything tangible. There's nothing I've written down that says I want to get this, accomplish that, have this number, have that. If I can just be 100% of who I, I was created to be and designed to be, then those goals are going to take care of themselves. And when we get through this process, which we're pretty soon being done, but I would imagine as well, like you said, they're living, they're breathing, we're going to continue to tweak,

we're going to continue to move. Next fight I win. They might be different than if next fight I lose. Contract is up in a couple of fights. Where are we going? What are we doing? Then we figure out what's next after that. And are you reciting and reviewing and seeing these things on a daily basis to keep you in tune with

I'm pretty excited. I mean, we have, we have a 100, a 200-page book that we've written and we've looked at, and there's an online course that there's, there's a, well, there's a video of you and Rich and Ellie. Is it out there? Can you find it right now? Mayhem mindset. Mayhem mindset.com.

Yeah. And then there's a listening portion where in every single challenge, every single week, there's a video and there's audio, and then there's a lot of writing. There's going in the blakes. It really does, which I did not like. not like school, most of us didn't, but it takes you kind of back to, okay, we're going to, you're going to put yourself on task and you're going to learn and then you're going to look in deep. How is, how is this different for you and you and the next thousand people?

How is this personal to me and my goals, my life, my shortcomings, my insecurities, and really pulling that stuff out. And I've learned so much just by writing. And one of those moments where you're writing something and something ends up on paper that you didn't really cognitively think about it just happened. And then you read it and realize, wow, that literally poured out of the essence of who I am. But it poured out of the essence of my heart. There it is.

There's the key to what we need to fix, right? Yeah. Vince Lombardy, and I'm not a big quote guy. I kind of try to avoid quotes. I love quotes. Because I got to figure that out. I'm kind of like that one quote with a thing. See, I'm like, well, hey.

Well, hey. Well. I'm like, getting on to like you. And you said it too. I don't get caught up in the tangible things I'm trying to get to. and I'm sitting there processing because me, I like, I got to know what I'm going to achieve.

Maybe I get too caught up. You can get too caught up in that fundamentally sometimes because you're losing sight of who you are at the core. And that's where some stuff comes in. It's like reciting and reviewing who the definition of you is and making sure that that's what's pouring into getting that and there's a beautiful thing too because we're sitting here talking about writing down goals and I'm almost saying,

well, don't worry about the goals, worry about who you are. But there's that beautiful. beautiful mixture between both. And like you said, when those things line up, you know exactly who you be, then you can do exactly what you want to do. Think about how David Goggins are been. Yeah. What they offer, how much easier it is for them to coach you when you show up in control of your emotions or knowing how to control your emotions and knowing who you are in identity. Yeah. Now their motivation, how to write things down, how to set stuff up, you know, how to get done. done what you're going to do during the day is really powerful and you're off to the races. If you show up requiring him to motivate you just to get you on your feet to get you moving,

dude, that's why I said motivation is so wasted in our culture in many ways. Our lives do this. They roller coaster instead of really I kind of show up and I know who I am and I can hold myself true to that. And now this motivation piece and education piece, proper goal setting, proper time management, get nutrition, all those things become force. multipliers, and we move ahead intentionally at a higher speed. Right. I was going to say this.

Vince Lombardi said individual commitment to a group effort. That's what makes team and society and our country move. And we have a crisis of identity in our world right now. Yeah. People don't really know how they fit. And I don't mean this. I'm not down on anybody. I'm not trying to be bad.

Just from sexuality to people are super concerned or don't know who they are. and we're fighting for that. And I think in order for us to be able to take advantage of the freedom that we've been given, we've got to know. You've got to know who the hell you are. You've got to be able to respond in identity, or I'm sorry, in opportunity or adversity. And you need to know what that is so that you know how you fit to the team. You know where you make a difference in your family, what your role is there, how that is on a team,

how that is in our culture, so that we're all moving together. And each one of us as individuals can make. a contribution that's valuable. Yeah, man. And if you're listening like that, those are the areas. That's the stuff right there. Like, when you're feeling moved by this conversation, it's you got to put pin the paper, man, and take action.

That's it. Because that's how, if not, again, it's, it's, if you live by your feelings all the time. Yeah. Your feelings are going to fail you. Yep. We've talked about standard over feelings. Yeah. Right?

Or writing out a standard. Like, you map out your entire standard written in language. And you have to recite and see this standard you've written for yourself and being intentional, whatever all this definition means for yourself, if you don't look at it every day, you know, day 50 Wilcompton is going to feel a lot different than day one Wilcompton and when me and you walk away from a meeting, if I don't carry out what you're teaching me and I don't write down and I'm not intentional with who I've defined myself as and I forget about it and I'm hype on day one. If I just go by feelings, day 50, like you're going to,

you're going to sleep in long. You start to feel bad for yourself, right? Like, oh, I can get away with this, I can get away with that. But if you're looking at your shit every day, you're and getting, you know, reciting what you've written for yourself or whether you have a mentor in your life or a coach or you're doing it alone. If you're not reciting to yourself what you wrote on day one, you're going to succumb to your feelings. For sure. And I love this, man. I love this. Even me sitting here, you know, for people listening right now, just today, tomorrow, next tomorrow morning, whatever, wake up, wake up a little bit early.

Write down five of the key, you know, we've talked about them. We call them your values. You call them whatever you want. Strength words, things I want to live by. Who am I? And write down five words and just write your own definition of them. Most of us listening probably right now say, if I said, what are the three things you stand for? They could say it.

They could come up with something in the next 10 seconds. I stand for these three things. But now put a colon and now put an actual definition with it. Put actual words and language with it. Because like I said, my definition of faith is different than yours and yours and yours. yours even though they're very similar they're going to be they're going to be somewhat similar they're going to be different they're going to be put in a different language and if it's not a language it's not a tool and then and then even just read those over this next seven days read those three read those definitions

of those three things once or twice or three times a day put it in your wall put in your phone and your notes and just realize how it kind of changes your perspective on things and how those three words or five words or those some a a mixture of those definitions somewhat comes up and comes in the back of your mind when you're in your next interaction when you're in your next meeting when you're in your next quiet time when you're in your because you've now taken these words and you've put a definition with them and now now now they are a language and now they are a tool and they become in the forefront of your mind now now you move a little definitely defined your you have somewhat defined because everything else is just subjective and

subconscious and and we can't we unless you're doing a ton of work every single day you can't trust your subconscious. Yeah. Because everything we see on social media, see on YouTube, listen to on podcasts, all that stuff is being downloaded into our minds and our brains, and it all gets jumbled up and it's not actually clearly defined. Yeah, it makes you move differently. I want to sharpen that, just to Ted.

Absolutely. Three values. You gotta finish. Three values. A strength value. Big Rock you know right now in your life. Yeah. Something like that.

A weakness value. So I want you to take, decide what is, what is. the negative emotion that gets the best of you. It's a reoccur, anger, worry, whatever that is. And I want you to create a value that's the opposite of that. Yours was. It was worry. And I worked at hope.

So hope was the value. And then an ideal value. That's a value that it's something that you see in the culture that you're aiming at, that you want to be a part of your life. So that the values encompass your strengths, your weaknesses, and your desires for the future. Those are the three values from the mayhem mindset process that I want someone to really look at and then move out into your day and make sure that that's

something that you're thinking about front of mind and you're using it. I love that, dude. Where can everybody find you? Mayhemmindset.com. There's a course there and a bunch of stuff. And I'm at Jimmy underscore Hensel on Instagram. I'm going to follow you, dude. Right on.

Follow me. Mayhemmindset.com and people can find like a course and just see all about you. Yeah, there's an online course there. People can get into. We send you a workbook. There's audio and video and the whole thing that goes that you can work through it on your own. Or if you want to spend some time with me, there's options to get involved with me so I can coach you one-on-one. That's awesome.

Mike, everybody knows where to find you. Go ahead, say it again, though. I'll be here on the bus if you guys need me. Now, at Mike Chandler & M-A on Instagram, Twitter, all that stuff. That's how I connect with people. Dude, I appreciate it, guys. This is awesome. Appreciate it.

For the boys. For the boys. The boys. Yeah. All right, fellas. Hey, guys, it's us. The Jonas Brothers. I'm Kevin.

And I'm Nick. And guess what? We created our own podcast called Hey Jonas. We invented a podcast? Well, we didn't invent it. We just contributed to it. We're the first people to do podcasts. We get to ask other people questions because we're sick and tired of being asked questions.

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