Busy, Yet Pretty - Breakups, Heartbreak and Getting back on Track

Episode Date: June 13, 2022

In this episode your host, Jadyn dives deep into the topic of post breakup heartbreak and how to cope. There is no worse feeling than experiencing heartbreak and being thrown off of your regular routines. Jadyn shares her best advice on moving forward, healing, getting back on routines and proceeding with your goals. Whether you're experiencing post breakup heartbreak, experienced heartbreak in the past, know somebody experiencing heartbreak or even one day (hopefully not) will experience heartbreak, this episode is for you.  Jadyn's Social Media platforms: - Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jadynhaileyy/ & https://www.instagram.com/busyyetpretty/ - Youtube: https://youtube.com/channel/UCx48PsDdAossgZjWWnXbvvg - Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@fairyjadyn - Shop my Closet on Motom: http://www.motom.me/?referral_id=2otTRBb5O&client_group_token=c2cad9169bb6afa9af7a4b70abf24aad - My Amazon Storefront: https://www.amazon.com/shop/jadynhaileyy --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/busyyetpretty/support Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hello there dolls, welcome back to the Busy Yet Pretty Podcast. I'm your host, Jaden Haley. I hope you all have been having the loveliest week, as always. I share most my life with you guys over social media and, of course, Busy at Pretty, and I owe it to you guys to share when big changes happens in my life as well. This episode is going to be based off of a big change that happened recently in my life and for advice that I could give to you guys who may be experiencing heartbreak as well. First, let's get into the weekly bullet points. So this week, I've really just been focusing on getting back on routine and doing my usual morning and night routines and daily routines.

Last week, I took off of work, so I have just been getting back to work. I've been waking up at 5.30 again. I will look outside while listening to podcasts and just, be excited for all the things that are yet to come. There's so many exciting things in the works right now, so I definitely am just looking forward to that. And not going to lie, I was pretty down for about two days, about last week or so. And I am now picking myself up because what does dwelling benefit? It does not benefit anything at all. So I had just really been focusing on feeling great, happy, and also working on my permit. Next on to the current obsessions. So my current

obsession of this week is hylogonic acid. I love hylogonic acid. I saw a video talking about putting water on your face, then applying hylogonic acid to your face being wet and it has literally restored the barrier of my skin and has made my face so, so hydrated. So I've been loving that so much. And another current obsession, which is so random, but one that I can totally think of, is sunny side-up eggs. Last year, I was eating about like three scrambled eggs a day for protein, and I got totally burnt out from it. And I know a lot of people have the same feeling about eggs sometimes, but like just getting a nauseous feeling. And this year, I have been not obsessed with eggs at all. I'm like, they are so gross, get them away from my face.

But then I forgot Sunnyside Up existed and I've been having it every single morning and I'm like, gosh, they are so good. But definitely Sunnyside Up over scrambled at the moment. Another current obsession is Hugh Kitchen Chocolate bars. I love Hugh Kitchen bars. I eat their chocolate every day. It's so good. I have a bar in every flavor. And lastly, I would say I'm just super obsessed with being thankful and gratitude.

I had just been really thinking of everything I'm grateful for and everything in my life and everything that's yet to come. So that's made me really happy. I'm just obsessed with gratitude right now. And that's something you should always be obsessed with, to be honest. Okay, the goal of the week. So my goal of the week is to complete my permit book. I am getting close to completing it. So that's a good sign. Another one is to start journaling more. I really find that it makes an impact on my day and my life because it really gets me thankful and also looking so forward to the future and really helps me manifest. That's one of my favorite ways to manifest because I feel like you can really tap into your dreams by doing that. So I definitely

want to start journaling more. Okay, a quote from my five-minute journal. If you look hard enough, you will find that even tough times offer pearls worthy of gratitude. I love that so, so much because it's so true. It's so good to look for the positive in any situation. I'm going to read one more quote off that I loved so much that I saw, which is, Everything you need is already inside. I love that one so much too because it's so true, you are enough, and every single thing that you need is within.

Okay, a self-love question to ask yourself. How have I been underselling myself perhaps unintentionally? That is such a good question to ask yourself, pause this episode, and journal that in your journal. Okay, now to our Apple podcast review. So this week's review is from Suji. Suji said, Please never stop this podcast. It's the only thing that gets me through work, but it's like the on-the-go self-help book.

I personally take this advice and try to implement it into my everyday life. Thank you so much. Much love, Suji. Suji, thank you so much for the sweetest reply. I'm so beyond thankful and it truly makes my day to know that busy at pretty has been an impact on you. Okay, guys, let's get into today's episode. So, as most of you probably already know, I've been in a long-term relationship for almost two years now, around the time I started influencing.

And if you've been following me since years back, then you've definitely been keeping up with my relationship. and everything that I showed online of our lovely adventures and times together. I've always been requested to make an episode on breakups and heartbreak, although I feel like I never felt it was my place to talk on a topic and give advice on the topic that I never experienced myself because I've only been in that one relationship. But now that I've experienced heartbreak and a breakup, I feel like it can share my views based on experience now. So I've received hundreds of messages asking for a story time on the breakup and of course I would never share what specifically happened or the situation or any details

for the respect of him. And this is an episode that is for advice that anyone could take advice from if you've had a breakup or not. So as with anyone in a serious long-term relationship, I had never thought in a thousand years that I wouldn't be spending the rest of my life with him. Everything that I shared over social media was completely genuine and real. I had an unmatched and uncomparable love for him, and it was definitely reciprocated, and I appreciated every single moment that we shared together. What I showed over social media is literally a fraction of how much love we had for each other and all the lovely times, it was literally a fraction of it.

But what I'm trying to say is it was never just to show stuff over social media and things be not good behind the scenes. We were always truly in love and that's that. So there's relationships where partners are not only lovers, but they're also best friends. And that was definitely the type of relationship that him and I shared. we were literally lovers and each other's best friends. As most of you know, we were supposed to move into LA together in a few months, so we definitely had the future planned out for us and literally decades planned out for us ahead.

But, you know, sometimes life doesn't turn out as planned. And never did I even once have a thought I would ever break up with him. But I think it's really important as a couple to each. set boundaries and reciprocate respect to each other. And if a partner isn't willing to give that full respect into the relationship, then that's totally okay, but that person may not be the right one for you. And I will forever and always preach to never settle for any less that you deserve. The breakup is still somewhat recent and hasn't been too long, but this is to show you how even after something so devastating and life-changing, you are still able to pick yourself up that fast.

So post breakup, I definitely started reflecting on the situation, but something I'm trying to accept and learn myself is that I can't always leave with answers. It's so easy to fall into wanting to completely understand everything, having the want to ask, why did you choose to do this, why this, why that, but sometimes you don't need verbal answers. Actions can speak for itself, and you may actually never understand or have answers, which is hard to accept. but it's true. And that's something I am trying to learn myself. But heartbreak begins to take a role for sure and it's very typical and common for girls to be all sad and cry for weeks, laying in bed, crying, watching movies all day and crying. So my surroundings, which were my family, wasn't too

surprise how I carried myself after the breakup because they know how much self-love and self-worth that I have for myself. And I remember, after bringing up with who I thought I was going to literally be spending the rest of my life with. I was, of course, heartbroken. But the first day, I was definitely missing our memories and I hadn't still processed what really happened. I never really understood the whole no appetite thing post breakup. And I know a lot of girls say that after breakups, they have no appetite for a while.

And I understood that so much. I just felt I had no appetite for like a few days. straight, but of course, I obviously knew I couldn't consistently skip meals because I truly value my health, so I definitely started eating normally again after a few days. Even though I was heartbroken, I told myself not to lay in bed all day and sleep and cry because what would that benefit? Seriously, it's just going to make you more sad. If you're surrounding yourself in sadness and sad activities, you are going to stay sad. And if you surround yourself with positive activities, you're going to become more positive when you're sad.

It's definitely good to acknowledge your feelings, though. That is definitely a priority. It's not good to shit out your feelings, but I think it's good to have a little time to take to yourself and really understand what you're feeling. And then once you really pinpoint your feelings and accept them, it's time to move on and start feeling positive again. So I took off work for that week, which is good because I have a flexible schedule because of freelance. But every morning that week, I still maintain to wake up every single day and get dressed, which was an automatic mood booster. I think waking up and getting dressed, washing your face, brushing your teeth, doing all hygienic stuff, and just feeling fresh and doing your regular activities like drinking a lot. of water, maybe doing some yoga, exercising. Those are automatic mood boosters and will definitely

increase your mood when you're sad. And of course, it might feel like such a big task to even get out of bed when you're sad. But when you force yourself to do that, you automatically will start feeling so much better. Around the third day, I started to give my appetite back, which was pretty good because I really value my health, especially because, I've experienced having an eating disorder a few years ago. I am so, so passionate about health now. I know that if someone else was going through a breakup that I knew, I would say still try to eat because that is also going to boost your energy. And I had such low energy from not eating for, well, I was still eating, but just not eating as much as I usually do. So I knew that I had to start eating again

to fuel my brain and nutrition and just feeling more energy again. But that same week, I had to help also with a family emergency, which did not help my mood whatsoever. Having two extremely hard things in one week is so mentally draining, yet I still maintain to get up every single day and be thankful for my life. I honestly surprised myself with how okay I was post-breakup. I was never necessarily happy that week, but I was definitely okay.

I was still, of course, shattered and heartbroken, but I know life moves on. And if you think about it, crying in bed for weeks and not getting back into your daily routines would only make things worse. And at that point, I was over the long crying and was more focused on the why. So I allowed myself to, of course, cry for the days that I felt like crying. I never tried to fight back any tears. There's no point in holding back feelings at all. And I definitely was crying quite a bit the first few days. But around towards the end of the week is when I only started crying probably once a day or not at all. And at that point, I would just more focus on the why.

So from then on until now, I still wonder and wish I had answers to my questions, but I've come to terms, I will probably never have answers and that's okay. I still get like a down feeling talking about it, but it's okay. Okay, we're moving on. Okay, so after the first week, I knew it was time to resume to my normal routines in life. So I started back on my workouts, waking up at my usual time around like six to like 5.30. And definitely eating all the food that needs to fuel my body to have energy and back to work, got my nails filled, and just started looking forward to the future. So at this point, I've just been on a good path to getting back to my regular routines. And the turnaround time of the breakup to me back to my usual routines was only a week,

which is pretty fast, I would say. I was completely heartbroken. There is nothing that can change that. but I acknowledge my feelings and I knew dwelling for weeks crying in bed wouldn't change a thing. And anyone who is going through a breakup or has been going through a breakup or hopefully not, but will one day go through a breakup. This is very important advice that I want to share with you guys. The way I was able to get back on my feet so fast was from the love, value, and respect I have had for myself since before and during the relationship.

I've always preached to have self-love, respect, advocacy, self-dates, and independent love for yourself, even when life is at its very best for when times like this happens. Because being thrown the unexpected and still knowing that you have the most important person in your life, which is yourself, is so important. This has nothing to do with my breakup at all, but I know this is common because a lot of girls talk about this, but it's common for girls to try to achieve a, quote, perfect body a few months after their breakup and go to the gym a ton and just all they care about is having a perfect body to, quote, show their ex what they're missing. No matter what your body look like before your

breakup is already the perfect body regardless. I never had that mentality to achieve a, quote, perfect body after the breakup because I already value myself so much. that no matter what I look like, I already have a, quote, perfect body. My mentality throughout my relationship is why I was able to proceed with life again so quickly. I was beyond in love and that love was definitely reciprocated, and I was his biggest fan as he was mine. Although I never relied on my significant other to make me happy, and he made me the happiest ever, just saying, like, he truly made me so, so happy. although I never relied on him or any other person in this world to make me feel happy.

If you go into a relationship unhappy with yourself and looking for a significant other to fill that void in realizing your significant other is the only thing making you feel happy and you're just sad and depressed when you're alone, then maybe it's time to spend some less time with them and more time with yourself to begin your self-love journey. It is so crucial to have self-love. for yourself because what if that relationship ends? Are you just going to be broken, depressed for the rest of time? No, you have to love yourself. And that's why it's so crucial to begin your journey to self-love, to feel fulfilled with yourself regardless of where you are in life. Single or in a relationship, it doesn't matter. Self-love can be started at any time and it should be always in your life.

Being in love with yourself also doesn't mean that you have less love for your significant other. It's always you at the end of the day, which is why self-love is so important. And if you meet someone that you get to share lots of your love with, then that's absolutely lovely. And that's as it should be. You should be wanting to share your love with others. But you have to have love within yourself to share your love with others. A few episodes back, I did an episode on taking yourself on a date, and I would always talk about it over my social media as well. And I would always promote taking yourself on a date, even when you're in a relationship. And that was to encourage you to continue your relationship with

yourself and being fulfilled with your own company, not just being fulfilled from company of others. Yes, I am heartbroken and I seriously miss every single memory. I'm sad that I won't be spending the rest of my life with the person that I love the most. And I will most likely never get answers to any of my questions, I will always love the memories that we share together as to In flames, but at the end of the day, intuition is everything. So if you're going through a breakup, acknowledge your feelings, and you can be sad for as long as you'd like. Healing is definitely a process, but once you feel like you're starting to heal, proceed with your goals, dreams, and life, because it's you at the end of the day, and you can choose how you want to live your life.

it for today's episode and I actually had recorded this earlier but I wanted to re-record it and just wait till I really had all my thoughts gathered together and I felt like this was a good time. So anyways, thank you guys for listening. I appreciate you guys more than ever. I literally in the happiest reading your guys's DMs and just knowing how the podcast makes an impact on you just makes me so happy. But this episode was definitely different than usual, and I have lots of positive episodes coming soon, so don't worry. We will do another It Girl mindset very, very soon. I hope you all had a lovely week and left with some advice, whether that's on self-love or getting back on your feet.

I never thought I'd have to record an episode on breakup, so this is definitely different. Anyways, life plays out as it should, and just remember, don't settle for any less than you deserve. I love you dolls so much and stay busy at pretty.