Busy, Yet Pretty - Heartbreak To Heal

Episode Date: July 10, 2023

Are you heartbroken? Maybe from a romantic relationship? A friendship? A family member? An experienced? A death? In this episode your host Jadyn Hailey shares her ultimate healing tips to recover from heartbreak. Whether you're experincing heartbreak now, or maybe preparing for a future heartbreak that may arise, this episode is for you. Tune into this episode with an open heart, ready to heal (& an iced coffee with almond milk).  My FAVORITE bed sheets / Code: BUSY Miracle Made How I find quality doctors easy  Zocdoc Jadyn's Social Media platforms: - Busy, Yet Pretty Groupchat    - Instagram: Jadyn's Instagram & Busy, Yet Pretty Instagram   - Youtube: Jadyn's Youtube   - Tiktok: Jadyn's Tiktok   - My Amazon Storefront: Jadyn's Amazon   - Shop my Closet on Motom: Jadyn's Closet Favs   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hello, my dolls. Welcome back to the busy yet pretty podcast. I'm your host, Jane and Haley. The excitement I have for this episode is through the roof. I have not talked about this since my breakup. So I just think it's really exciting to get back into talking about this because I've gotten so many questions about heartbreak and let's just get straight into the weekly review because I'm just so excited about this episode. As you know, I took last week off. I actually took the time to plan more into this episode. So I'm back at it and so excited to talk to you guys today. This week I've been prioritizing getting back on schedule, which has felt so nice and rewarding. And just planning out the year ahead, trying to figure out just a little rough draft of how I want my life to be in a year and just some goals I have and what I think the overall plan is going to be. I've been spending a lot of time outside, went to Malibu, and, you know, just got that summer tan on. Not going to lie, I did get sunburnt. Um, that is not okay. That's not cute. I kind of look like a tomato, but let's just pretend I am sunkissed. Another thing this week is I've been trying to really prioritize self-care. It's felt so nice to just

really think to myself, what do I need? Again, not what do I want, but what do I need? And some of those things looked like to me is getting more sleep, going to bed earlier, reading, doing things off my phone and getting outside, making an effort to get daily movement in, like walking, exercise. So lots of those things, which I'll talk about in my current obsessions. Moving on to my current obsessions, my current obsession right now is the sun out in the evening. It will literally be 8 o'clock and the sun is finally going down. Like, what a dream. I love summer and seeing it out of my big, beautiful windows and my high rise. It's just so beautiful. I'm so lucky for what I have and I know you guys can have the exact lifestyle that you dream of. Never forget that.

Another current obsession is my coconut yogurt. I love coconut yogurt and yogurt bowls. They just taste so good and just so much like summer. And another current obsession right now is evening workouts. I was doing a lot of morning workouts for this past year, and I began doing like evening workouts, so I'll walk about two to four miles every single day. I mostly try to aim for two, but if I can do four, that'd be great.

Then after dinner, I'll do about a 30-minute easy workout, and it truly just feels so nice and I just feel so much more energized than doing it right in the morning. So I just have been loving that. As I said, I love getting my daily steps in and sometimes I just can't make it outside some days if I'm really busy. So something I'm currently obsessed with is literally just walking around my place, like walking back and forth. There's no need to go try to find a place to walk outside if you're busy. Just try walking a little bit, a few minutes between each little task you're doing. and it can just feel so good and the steps add up and it just feels like you were actually active

throughout the day. And my last current obsession right now is to make a to-do list from scratch. I, for the past years, years, have been doing a to-do list from really cute planners and don't get me wrong. I love doing it. But sometimes I will get too excited and just write way too much and it won't actually motivate me to check each thing off. So it's been so rewarding to actually write down what I have to do on a pen and paper, just a plain piece of paper, and it just makes me feel so much more productive, which I think is very unpopular opinion, but it's good to remember that not everything has to be aesthetically pleasing to your eye, just like my pen and paper. That does not even have good handwriting. I'm just writing fast what I need to do, but it is so rewarding at the end of the

day, and I just check it off. Moving on to the goal of the week. So my goal of the week right now is to get my permit. No, I will not have my permit by the end of the week, but more of I want to take more steps to getting my permit, meaning like practice driving and parking lots and just trying to have more experience. So I got to just try practicing driving soon because, you know, one day in my life I'll have a pink Rolls-Royce. So I guess I have to start practice driving soon. Another goal at the week is to do a little skincare purge. I feel like I have so much skincare that I don't use all stored in my cupboards and it just is taking up way too much space and makes me so overwhelmed so I really want to start doing a little skincare purge get rid of things I haven't used and donate them

and another goal this week is to post a apartment tour you guys have been asking for so long to see an apartment tour video and I finally need to give it to you guys I posted photos of my apartment recently over my Instagram and I think it's finally time to film one my last goal of the week is to set better work hours. I work for myself so I like to really set time to not be answering emails till a.m. hours. And I think that's really important for me to just try to schedule correctly. And I found it really helpful to actually stop working at 5 p.m. and then just take that rest of the day for myself. So that is something I'm really trying to prioritize. Moving on to an affirmation. Opportunities flow into my life in every aspect. I absolutely love that.

affirmation and I really recommend you journal that in your journal and affirm that to yourself. Moving on to a challenge, take yourself on an ideal day date. What I mean by that is don't go to dinner, don't go to do a small, easy thing, but take yourself on a date that you would dream of doing. Take yourself on it and stop waiting on someone else to do it for you. I love to take myself on day dates and do fun things for myself that I would want in a relationship, but there is no way you'll find me looking for. for a guy in order to fulfill that need, so I will fulfill it for myself. Just as you should for yourself.

Moving on to a self-love question to ask yourself. What do I value most about myself? I love that so unbelievably much. Really journal that and think about that question and take that time to really appreciate yourself and think, what do you love most about you? Moving on to a podcast review. If you want to be featured on next week's episode, leave a podcast review over Apple podcast. This review is from Millie and Millie titled her review in This Together, which I just

think is so, so sweet. Jaden, hearing about your journey is so comforting and brings me so much support and motivation. Our journeys are so similar, getting our license this summer, continuously working on ourselves, specifically our individual journeys and not trying to appease to others. Even niche things like passing out from needles. I have literally never met someone else who does that. L.O.L. I listened to your podcast on my hot girl dog walks, and they set me up for success and put me in such a gracious and motivated headspace. I can't wait to keep listening. Peace and love, I wish we lived closer. Millie. Let me just say, that brought me so much joy. Your review

made me so unbelievably happy, and we're truly twins and so many aspects from the needles to our license to working on ourselves to become the best version of us. I am so proud of you and I just love how you said it makes you so gracious and happy and motivated. So thank you so much for being such a sweet supporter and listener. I am so proud of you and I love you so so much. Without further ado, my loves, let's talk about today's episode. For the awaited topic you guys have been waiting for, which I am so happy to talk about this because it's been a year since I talked about this.

The hot topic in everybody's life at some point, which is heartbreak. Whether you've experienced heartbreak or not, this episode may really help you or help someone you know or your future self. Heartbreak doesn't happen just for romantic relationships. Heartbreak can be a romantic relationship, family relationships, friends, careers. Heartbreak can be from regret, experiences, death. Heartbreak can occur in all different situations in different forms. When you're heartbroken, the worst thing you could do to yourself is claim to yourself that you're not heartbroken.

And you begin to silence your heartbreak and just not allow yourself to truly process those emotions or won't accept the fact that you are heartbroken because you may view it as weak or scared for other people to view you as weak. You have to realize that no matter what, emotions at some point will hit you one way or another. So begin to acknowledge that you're heartbroken. That is the first step to healing. If you're heartbroken, you are not weak. You are strong to acknowledge that you are heartbroken. To acknowledge that you are heartbroken is the first step to begin your healing journey. And that's the biggest step in your healing journey. And acknowledging and admitting to being heartbroken doesn't mean that you're letting the person or the experience or thing would ever broke your heart.

Let them have the upper arm or won the situation. There is no upper arm or winning person in a situation where you're heartbroken. admitting to being heartbroken is for yourself. And when you're in the depth of being heartbroken, you may think to yourself, how could someone feel this bad? How do I feel this bad in my life? I want you to stop and think to yourself,

how beautiful and how thankful you should be to be able to experience such beautiful human emotion. How stunning is it that we get to experience heartbreak in such deep human emotion? How sad would it be to live a life of just feeling nothing, feeling no joy, no heartbreak. Heartbreak is a stepping stone in life. You have to realize that.

In order for us to feel our best, we have to feel our worst. You need to begin to realize that there is no due date to heal. You may think I've been heartbroken this month. This is the day I was heartbroken and I'm going to give myself a month to be heartbroken and heal. No, you cannot let yourself have a time limit of how long it's going to take you to heal from a situation or a person. or a thing. Healing looks different on everyone and you could be healed yet you still have internal wounds years later or even for the rest of your life. Heartbreak is usually something that you have had emotion towards positively so you could have such a safety or a positive emotion towards

some person or an experience or a thing and when that thing turns you wrong is when you become heartbroken. An example is I was bullied in middle school and high school and yes, That really left damages and wounds to me, but I was never heartbroken because all those people didn't meet anything to me. Yes, of course it made me really sad how they treated me. Yes, it took lots of years to heal from those experiences, but it never broke my heart because those people I never had loved for or a positive view towards. From the start, rather than my relationship a few years back where I was really close to someone, I loved them so much and that was my first true time experiencing heartbreak. So personally, I experienced heartbreak from a romantic relationship. Personally, my heartbreak stem from betrayal and broken trust

where many of you listening, I'm sure, can relate very much to cheating or just having broken trust in a relationship. Whether that's romantically or with your family or your friends, most often everyone will experience this type of heartbreak at least once in their life. And with betrayal and cheating and just having a lack of trust, whether that's making new friends or talking to new people, you may put a wall up as a defense mechanism to make sure that you never experience a situation like that again. It's important to remember to not let one experience or one person ruin more good people and more good things coming into your life, along with letting

one experience also ruin another person's chance to come into your life. Not to take a trip down memory lane, but I can still remember the feeling of feeling like I was punched in the stomach with the information I heard and feeling so betrayed and so heartbroken trying to comprehend how someone I love so much could do this to me. But of course, I loved myself to make the decision where I have to heal from this heartbreak. I accepted I was heartbroken and I knew it was time to start my healing journey. When you're heartbroken, whatever you may be heartbroken from, it's easy to think in your mind, I'll never get over this. No matter what, I will always be sad. Why are you creating that as your reality? Why are you making that the rest of your life?

Whether this was an experience of heartbreak from a romantic relationship, a friendship, or a career opportunity ending, anything. You have to remember that at some point in time, this person or this thing or this opportunity meant nothing to you. Someone else hearing your heartbroken experience is most likely not going to be heartbroken because they don't have emotions attached to it. You are heartbroken because of the emotions you created and attached to this person or experience or opportunity. Again, drill this in your head. This person at one point in time meant nothing to you. This opportunity meant nothing to you. Yes, you're heartbroken, but this person can mean nothing to you again.

You can't live your life, wallowing in the comfort of your heartbreak. Stop feeding off your heartbreak. Stop wallowing in the comfort of your heartbreak. Stop wallowing in the comfort of your heartbreak. heartbreak and what I mean by that is you find your heartbreak comfortable because you're hanging on to past experiences past people you're hanging onto the past and that can be comforting because you don't want to accept the fact that you have to move on acknowledge that you are heartbroken and begin to heal whatever left you heartbroken whether this is a relationship a romantic relationship a

friendship a family member a death or whatever personal experience you have a being heartbroken, it didn't happen to you. It happened for you. If maybe someone died in your family that you really loved, you may think, how did this happen to me? Why me? Why did this happen to me? This didn't happen to you. This happened for you. Maybe this was your wake up call to realize that you only live once and start living your life as you should. Maybe you're heartbroken because your friend lied to you and you trusted them. This may be your wake up call to realize that they aren't supposed to be in your life. Maybe your boyfriend cheated on you. That may be your wake-up call that there is someone better out there for you.

Heartbreak is meant to teach you something. Allow the good to flow in from this. Whether it's a lesson or a better opportunity or a better person, allow the good to flow into you. If you continue to affirm yourself the past experiences that happened to you or keep wallowing in the past and keep living, talking, your reality in the past, you are never going to allow good things to happen for you and to change your life. There is good and better things out there for you.

That happened for a reason. So why are you putting a wall up to not allow better things to come into your life? There is a better person out there for you. There is a better job out there for you. There is a better love out there for you. There are better friends out there for you. There is always something better for you out there. So why are you being so hung up on the past and not allowing it to come to you?

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Again, that's try miracle.com slash busy to treat yourself. The minute you let go and stop living in the past is when your life will finally change. So as I said, allow the good to flow in from this, whether it's a lesson, a better opportunity, a better person, allow it to flow into your life. I promise you, the world, God, whatever higher power you believe in will not leave you hanging unless you accept that experience is your reality. But the minute you let go of that experience and realize that is not my reality, that's not my story, that's not who I am, that is the moment when good will start to flow your way. When you're heartbroken, heartbreak happens because you're experiencing some sort of loss. I want you to begin to acknowledge every bit of abundance that surrounds you.

As I said, a heartbreak, you're experiencing loss, whether that was a death, whether that was a relationship, whether that was a loss of a job opportunity. You're experiencing some sort of loss, so you need to fill that void with abundance. Again, don't have a wall up from your heartbreak. Why would you not allow better people, better opportunities, better things come into your life? Just because you're uncomfortable to step out of your heartbreak because you're so addicted to the past. Such as my experience with heartbreak, how I love someone so much and they broke my trust and they absolutely heartbroken me. Should that mean I never trust anyone again because I don't want to be heartbroken again? No.

I can't not ever trust someone again. Letting one experience ruin all the good. future experiences to come is doing more harm and self-sabotage than any good. Put down your defense, okay? Take down the defense. By never trusting someone again that's already putting an absolute zero that there's no people I can trust in my life rather than of course I'm probably going to come across some people who I can't trust in my future but along the way I'll probably find at least a few people I can trust. That's like you saying that you failed your test last week so now this week when you have to take this week's test you don't want to take the test because you're scared

you're going to fail and you know you're going to fail you're already giving yourself an F before you you even try why are you quitting and giving yourself a definite answer before trying same with the job opportunity maybe you apply for your dream job and they want to meet with you to potentially hire you you're so excited you meet with them and then they say unfortunately we chose someone else for this position. Okay. What are you going to do now? Wallow, cry, never try to have a job again? No. You're heartbroken. That is okay. But are you never going to try again to apply to another job because you're scared to experience that rejection again or that loss again? No. Whatever heartbreak you're going through, whatever heartbreak that your future self may go through, take time to heal. You know what

healing truly means to you and what you need. Do not do what you want, but do what you need. Maybe you're comfortable living in the past. Maybe you want to keep talking about it to other people. Maybe you want to keep talking about the past and saying that you want to go back to them, even though they were so rude to you. But deep down, you know, they're ultimately not good for you. So why would you go back to them? Maybe your coworkers were really mean to you, your past job, so you stop working there. Are you going to go back to there because you're comfortable and put up with the people how they were treating you, or are you going to go try to get a new job that could potentially impact your life for the best? There's nothing to be ashamed about.

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So if I use this, you should too. Go to Zocdoc.com slash busy and download the Zocdoc app for free. Then find and book a top-reed doctor today. That's ZOCDOC.com slash busy. Sockdoc.com slash busy. Save time playing Dr. Roulette and find a quality doctor today with Sock Doc. When you're heartbroken, maybe the best thing for you and what you want is just to lay in bed all week and do nothing. Think to yourself.

What will that ultimately help? Okay. When you're heartbroken, I want you to do this. Spend one day crying. spend one day in bed, you know, get it out, get the emotions out. Then after that day, begin getting things in order. No, I do not mean shut off your emotions and don't think about the past. I'm talking about accept your heartbreak, accept your feelings.

But what is crying in your room all day, all month, all year going to change for you? It's going to change nothing because you're surrounding yourself in negative energy. Start getting things in order. Clean your room. clean your house, journal, work out. I understand when you hit rock bottom and you're heartbroken, the thought of committing and taking action on those steps feel like the biggest step ever and the biggest leap ever.

And it may sound so exhausting, but I promise you, it will be worth it. Feeling healed is the most rewarding thing in the world. Don't let heartbreak break you. You are not broken unless you choose to be. your past experiences and their actions, your ex, your ex best friend, a death, your past does not define you unless you let it. Choose you, choose to heal, choose to move on. It's simple as that. I understand how hard it is to move on. I understand how hard it is because you're addicted to the past. I understand how sad it is. But you have to understand nothing will change your situation and your state of reality.

unless you decide to take action. If you want to be sad for the rest of your life, then you go do that. I'm not going to stop you. But if you want to heal, if you want to start living your dream life, if you want to allow good opportunities and good people come into your life,

then you have to start to take action to heal yourself. Okay? Start taking the steps. You know what you need to heal. If that's signing up for therapy, babe, I got a therapy link in the show notes for you. If that means moving to a new city, babe, make the steps to moving to a new city. If that means getting a new group of friends, start finding new friends.

Stop letting your past define you, okay? Again, choose you, choose to heal, and choose to move on. I love you guys so much and I really hope you guys enjoyed this episode. I get so riled up when talking about topics I'm truly so passionate about and heartbreak is something that I truly am just so passionate about and seeing how much you guys requested this episode made me really be excited and wanted to talk about this and how I could possibly help you guys get a better feeling about heartbreak and how you guys can heal. So I love you guys so, so much. Please remember that the past does not define you. You are your own person and you can choose to live the life

you want to live. I love you guys so much and do not forget to stay busy yet pretty. Maw.