Busy, Yet Pretty - I Don’t Drink Or Smoke… & Here’s Why

Episode Date: April 1, 2024

Life isn’t about following societal norms, that don’t call to you. In this episode you host, Jadyn Hailey shares why she chooses not to drink or smoke. Whether you’re looking for directions on how to navigate social settings without alcohol or are interested in learning why some choose to not partake, Jadyn shares her raw and transparent experience + advice on life without drinking or smoking. Tune into this episode with a matcha latte with almond milk, as you learn that sometimes it’s not about the cup in your hand that matters but the CONFIDENCE in hand.    Current Obsessions: reading!!! my fav books -  self improvement books mat pilates For my gals with businesses!! love shopify   Become your own dream girl with me!! : - Instagram: Jadyn's Instagram & Busy, Yet Pretty Instagram - Busy, Yet Pretty Groupchat  - Productive Day In My Life: WATCH - Tiktok: @Fairyjadyn - My Amazon Storefront: Jadyn's Storefront - Outfit Details: My Closet Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hello, my dolls. Welcome back to the Busy Yet Pretty Podcast. I'm your host, Jaden Haley. It's been a while since we last talked and I'm very excited for today's episode. But without further ado, let's get into today's weekly review. So last week was my birthday. I truly had such a lovely birthday. I spent it with my mom. We had a really nice spa day and had a really nice like coconut milk tea foot soak and had a really nice breakfast. Then I took a pottery class with her, which was so fun. I'm definitely an experienced type of girl. I will always pick experiences over physical gifts any day. So it just truly made my day to go adventure and go out with her. It was my 21st birthday, so it just felt so special spending it with my best friend in the entire world. And also this week, I have been really

just trying to transition into spring. I am just so excited for all the spring weather. and activities and the style. Everything about spring is truly just so exciting because it makes me ready for summer. Now on to the current obsession. My current obsession right now is flowers. I truly love having fresh flowers. Always in my home.

It just makes it so lively and so beautiful. Without doubt, a flower girl. Another current obsession right now is having minerals in water. So I will either add some sort of liquid, minerals or Celtic sea salt into my water and it's really good for electrolytes and really healthy for you. So I have been loving doing that lately. Another current obsession right now is salic acid. I find it so helpful to put it on my face and any little treated spots for any little blemishes.

Salisilic acid has really been one of my favorite skincare products as of lately. And lastly, my current obsession right now is laying in the sun. I will pick a day to go bask in the sun any day. And I'm not going to lie, I like sun tanning, not tanning, just laying in the sun during the spring, way more than laying in the sun during the summer because I get heat headaches and I feel like a lot of us do. So I just love basking in the sun in the spring. Now on to the goal of the week. My goal of the week right now is to incorporate more running into my workouts.

I love running, but I definitely prefer walking more than running. but I think it's really good for your health, so just incorporating maybe running once a week into my workouts. Another goal of the week right now is to decrease my scrolling time. I really want to drastically decrease how much I'm on my phone mindlessly scrolling. I am guilty of it. I feel like we all are, and it's something always to be mindful of and check in with yourself once in a while to really remember how, you know what, maybe we're scrolling too much on social media or on our phone. Another goal of the week right now is to try new different teas out. I am a tea girl. Tea over coffee. If you are a tea over coffee girl, please let me know in a DM, a comment section, anything, because same here. I love a good tea, whether that's matcha, or even just a loose leaf tea. Right now I've been loving spearmint, peppermint, dandelion root. Chef's kiss so good. And my last gold week right now is this.

stay to schedule. I find it so rewarding to actually stay on track and on schedule, which is a no-brainer. But when you actually take that time and effort to stay on schedule, you would just become so much more productive. Moving on to an affirmation. I am about to have the best spring yet. I love that affirmation so much because it is spring. It is time to have the best spring yet, seriously. And I just love that affirmation. And now on to the self-love question. How am I going? to improve my routines this spring. I love that question. It's really good to be mindful of how we can improve our routines, ourselves, and ultimately become the best version of you. Now on to the challenge. The challenge for you is plan a solo spring date with yourself. I love this challenge so much because,

as you know, I am someone who constantly preaches to go on solo dates and it is so good for your self-love journey and your mental health, and I really, really encourage you to do this. And if you do, tag me in your story on your little solo date. Now moving on to the podcast review. This review is from Foxy, and Foxy said, Jaden, your podcast has brought the spark back into my life, big time. I discovered busy yet pretty when I was at such a low point, and I had no motivation, no faith in myself, or my life.

I lost a lot of my friend group and felt pretty ice. Through listening to your inspiration and guidance, I started rethinking how I felt about being alone and learned to be grateful for myself and being my own best friend. I'm truly living my best golden class girl life now, and I am so grateful to you for helping me get here. Foxy, that is the sweetest review ever. Thank you so unbelievably much for your love and support, but you realizing how being your own best friend is so sacred and beautiful is just amazing, and I am just so proud of you because

that is the biggest and best thing you will ever learn in your life. That being your own best friend is truly stunning and you will always be the one person there for you forever. I'm so proud of you and if you want to be featured on next week's episode, please feel free to leave a podcast review over Apple Podcasts. Without further ado, let's get into today's episode, which I am extremely excited for because this has been something that I've gotten many, many questions on as I've mentioned it a few times over my socials and thought, why not talk about this, especially since I just turned 21, the year that I am finally able to legally drink. So let's get into this episode.

But first, I want to preference and say that this is not an episode to persuade or change anyone's actions or opinions on drinking, smoking, or drugs, but to solely share why I choose not to partake on those things. And that goes to say, I truly sympathize for those who have or current. still are struggling with an addiction, specifically with drugs, alcohol, or smoking. But I most definitely have seen and experienced it with close personal relationships on how it affects people and not only affects that person, but affects the people around them. And I have definitely witnessed the transparent pain, those who suffer and have suffered

with addiction, and how absolutely heartbreaking that can be. I also feel like have witnessed that before. I have even more of a drive not to partake in these things as well. Like those experiences played a role and an influence on why I choose not to. So with have seen the negative effects of not being sober or clean as someone who has made a self-promise to not fall into that tunnel. I've been able to create an outlook on drinking, smoking, and drugs to be something that I don't have any desire to and will not have any plans in partaking in. Now let's get into why I don't drink.

As I said, I just turned 21, and of course the most asked question to anyone who turns 21 is, what bar did you go do? Do you remember last night? What was your first illegal drink? I, in fact, did not consume even a sip of alcohol on my birthday, and this is not an attempt for me to have that as a bragging right or to think I'm better than someone else

that I didn't drink on my 21st birthday. but rather to explain and show you how you do not have to follow social stereotypes if that's not what you want to do. You shouldn't feel pressured by having to do something that is a societal norm to feel like you're fitting in or that you're doing the right thing. My personality and interest were never drawn to any sorts of drugs, drinking or smoking to begin with. That being said, I'd never welcome those activities into my life as I quite literally have not one bit of, of time for distractions because where I aspire to be in life and who I aspire to be, my wants and interests of what I want in life and as being who I am just doesn't align with those things as well as my health. I don't want to jeopardize my health with substances that are just

completely unneeded. My view on things are if something doesn't add a positivity to your life, then you simply don't need it, let alone if it takes away positivity from you, I would avoid it at all cost. I've had quite a bit of you message me and ask me, as some of you know, I don't drink, asking me what I do in social situations when it comes to me not drinking. Mind you, I live in LA where substance abuse is extremely common, along with partying, clubbing, and blocking out is the absolute norm on the weekday. But a lot of you guys wondering how I navigate the city and social situations without partaking and still being quote involved. And the answer is, to be honest, I have not one care what someone's opinion is on me and what I choose to do in my life.

Who has time to care what someone else does with their time in their own life? If someone has an opinion on what I do, so what? Who cares? That's their opinion? They're entitled to their own opinion. That opinion does not mean it's right or true and I have nothing to prove to them. It is very important that I had developed this mindset and nurtured this carefree mindset, where I've become resilient to even attempting to care what one person thinks. I care what one person thinks actually. I was wrong.

I actually care what one person thinks. And that's myself. When I'm at a gathering or a social setting where everyone is drinking, I often don't even get a mocktail and I will just opt for water. When you don't drink, it's really common that you want to have something in your hand to feel like you fit in and that you're not standing out, clearly showing that you're not drinking. but I simply do not have the desire to prove myself to anybody to portray myself that I am drinking.

So I quote, blend in. I don't need a cup in my hand when I have confidence in hand. And without doubt, someone always comes up to me and will be asking me, why are you not drinking? And I swear, that is the moment where it becomes a 20 question interrogation of them just trying to understand why am I not drinking and them trying to attempt to convince me to go get a drink or to drink with them. Failing to peer pressure to do what someone else wants just to impress them, or it's too hard for you to say no,

is the absolute definition of disrespecting yourself. Whether you have experienced this or other similar situations, you may believe that you're looked at as boring or possibly feeling out of the loop because what someone else said about you. But you need to remember that people don't like, quote, different people because they know those who are different have an unmatched form of confidence and strength to be okay being different. And I promise you without doubt your dedications and boundaries to yourself will be acknowledged and appreciated by the right people. You will meet the right

people who appreciate who you truly are and you'll meet the people who you don't feel like you have to prove yourself to them. Where it's so important that you actually stick to your beliefs and what you choose to do for the actions of your lifestyle because you will meet the right people who value your decisions and may have similar decisions as you. That goes to say, I am not anti-drinking whatsoever. It is all about listening to your needs and what works best for you and, of course, living a balanced lifestyle. So if I decide to go have a little drink on occasions, then I 100% would. But personally, I choose not to have alcohol to be familiar to my lifestyle, as I truly have no desire, and it just doesn't align to my lifestyle for my goals, who I am, and what I want to become. But again,

like I said, it's all about respecting what you want, regardless of outside influence, so if I do want to have a drink, I would. Although smoking and any sorts of drugs is an absolute non-negotiable know for me personally because I just choose not to align myself with that. Again, this is not to shame anybody who chooses to have that in their life. Personally, just not my thing. And I believe that each person has the right to stand by their decision and I stand by mine with confidence and truly respect anybody else's decisions, even if I don't necessarily agree with them. But I just have respect for the people who know what they want and have respect in their own decisions. If you choose to steer clear from these substances, you should not feel embarrassed, but instead feel proud.

Not proud that you feel better than others since that you don't partake in those things, but proud you value your needs and don't stoop to social stereotypes that don't align to you. Another big question I get asked is, how do I have fun without drinking? When it comes to alcohol being the quote liquid courage to many people, I feel like it becomes a crutch to gain confidence and to loosen up, where I've actually put the time and effort into my self-love journey to naturally develop long-term confidence, where I never needed to turn to a crutch for confidence, which I feel is a very important thing if you are trying to have fun and go out and feel comfortable at social settings without

drinking. It's very important to start with your confidence. You need to start your self-love journey and truly find that confidence and security within yourself, and truly that will bring you so, so far. But as I already have the confidence, the question is, how do I have fun without drinking? I don't think people realize that you can have the same amount of fun or even more, not drinking, as you would as if you were drinking. The only difference not drinking is, is I actually get to remember the fun night that I had since I wasn't just blackout drunk. That being said, being I don't have the common interest, which most people share, that is drinking, I don't have the interest to go out clubbing or since that is the majority what clubbing is centered around, as well as

what going out late is center around. And the same goes for getting invited. Sometimes I'm just not invited as much as I would be to things once people realize that I don't drink. If you've been in this position where people have stopped inviting you to go out or to do things because you don't drink, I want you to never take this personally. If your friends aren't able to maintain a friendship or want to continue a friendship with you because you don't drink, says so much about that person. That is someone that you wouldn't want in your life anyways because you can still be friends with those who choose a different lifestyle or choices than you. And maybe you were that friend that would go out all the time, going clubbing, getting drunk, and you suddenly just

decided to stop and choose maybe a different lifestyle, you may tend to find yourself losing interest in those people that you'd go out with. If those friends were just dedicated to drinking and were actually your friends and vice versa to them, they may lose interest to you because you're not doing their same common interest anymore. I know I have so many business listeners in here. And I've seen some of your guys' work. You guys are insane with your own little shop. And since I started my podcast, I know the feeling of putting so much time to something and wanting the recognition that you deserve. So when it comes to your own shop and selling, of course you want the recognition. Which is why I love Shopify.

Shopify is a global commerce platform that helps sell at every stage of your business. From the launch your online shop stage to the first real-life store stage, all the way to the we did it, we hit a million order stage. Shopify's here to help you grow. This platform I truly trust and, what? I love is you can sell anything, whether it's Macha or Pilates equipment, Shopify is there to help you grow your business and reach your target audience. I also love how it can allow you to put less effort into selling and allow you to be more creative with your shop because now you can sell with less effort thanks to Shopify magic, your AI-powered All-Star. Shopify helps you turn

browsers into buyers with the internet's best converting checkout, 36% better on average compared to other leading commerce platforms. I know you guys have so much potential and if you have a business, it's time to take it to the next level. Sign up for $1 per month trial at Shopify.com slash busy yet pretty all lowercase. Go to Shopify.com slash busy yet pretty now to grow your business no matter what stage you're in. Shopify.com slash busy yet pretty. I promise you guys will not regret using Shopify. Those who don't respect your personal decisions and choose to discontinue your friendship because you decide to stop drinking or smoking, they are then doing you a favor because you don't want what doesn't want you back. Them leaving the friendship opens a complete opportunity

for the right people to come into your life who actually respect your decisions and who may actually choose the same similar lifestyle as you as well. As my lifestyle doesn't include drinking or smoking, I'm not trying to persuade people to not drink and smoke. I'm not anti-drinking and smoking. I will not not be friends with somebody because they drink or smoke. It's a personal choice. And with this choice that I choose and many other people choose to do, which is not drinking or smoking, is often looked as as different or even an outcast. So with this choice comes times of being practically interrogated and having to constantly

re-explain why you're not drinking. And you may even run into times where you see friendships drift about. part, but this is all a part of your own choices and boundaries to further you to become the person that you want to become. Life is a choice. Every single choice that you make in life is for you and you only, and I want you to stand by your decisions and your choices, regardless of what anybody thinks and be proud of it. I love you guys so much and I hope you guys enjoyed this episode as much as I did recording it. I feel like this topic was very sensitive topic to to talk about, especially in this day and age where substance abuse becomes a norm.

And sometimes people who choose to make their own decisions struggle with losing friendships or feeling like an outcast. And I feel like it's just a topic that really needs to be talked about more. But I really enjoy talking about it. And I hope you guys love this episode as well. If you want to be featured on next week's episode, please feel free to leave a podcast review over Apple Podcasts. And please, please share this episode over your stuff.

story to help motivate other people to become the best version of themselves and consistently grow the busy yet pretty community. I love you guys with all my heart, stand proud of your decisions, and do not forget to stay busy yet pretty. M'a.