Busy, Yet Pretty - Mom & Daughter Point Of Views: Maintaining A Close Relationship, Eating Disorder Recovery, Sex & Boyfriends

Episode Date: March 14, 2023

Mom and Daughter relationships look different on everyone. Which is why your host, Jadyn Hailey brought her mom onto today's episode to disucss various topics such as maintaining a close relationship, eating disorder recovery & boyfriends. Tune into this epsiode as you drink your matcha latte with almond milk, finding this episode to be a safe space to hear potential answers, to your questions.   Sponsors: Allow your hair to glow and compliment you your OUAI, using Code: PRETTY (for 15% off your entire purchase): OUAI Give therapy a try with BetterHelp (Use link for 10% off your first month): BetterHelp   Jadyn's Social Media platforms:   - Instagram: Jadyn's Instagram & Busy, Yet Pretty Instagram   - Youtube: Jadyn's Youtube   - Tiktok: Jadyn's Tiktok   - Shop my Closet on Motom: Jadyn's Closet Favs   - My Amazon Storefront: https://www.amazon.com/shop/jadynhaileyy   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hello, my dolls. Welcome back to the Busy Yet Pretty Podcast. I'm your host, Jaden Haley. If you are new today, I am Jaden Haley here to help you achieve your dream life and become the best version of yourself. In this podcast, I talk about self-care, self-love, relationships, bullying, eating disorders, everything. So guys, I am so excited about today's episode. We have a special guest, which is my lovely mom. And I'm trying to figure out if I want to, continue doing the weekly review when I have a guest on or not. So let me know your thoughts. But as of now, I'm going to continue doing the weekly review when I have guests on. But I have so many exciting guests coming up. And I would really appreciate if you guys share the podcast over your Instagram story and tag both my Jaden Haley and Busy at Pretty account. So we can build more of a community and get excited about all the new guests coming up.

But let's get straight into our weekly review, which I'm going to make it a little more brief so we can get into this episode, which I'm so excited for. But let's get into today's weekly review. So this week, I've been really trying to prioritize recharging. I have found it so necessary to recharge. And I always say this, but you really, really actually recharge. I mean, if you need extra hours of sleep, sleep in. Like those are the things that have been really helping me lately because I wake up about

5 to 5.30 every day. It was 5.30 a.m. But now it's 5. And I found it to be so nice when I just sleep in a little extra on the weekends, even though I like can't help it and I want to get up. But just making myself really go slow and take time has been such a priority, which I hope you guys have been doing as well. Because the minute you begin to recharge, that will help you be so much more productive.

throughout the week. Another thing this week is it was National Eating Disorder Awareness Week, which I shared a post over Instagram if you saw acknowledging my past and those who are struggling. I hope anyone who is struggling can find and locate the self-love for themselves and really try to seek help because it is such a miracle. And I promise you guys, I will touch more on this topic soon. That's something that I know has helped you guys so much is my past eating disorder episodes. so I definitely want to start touching on it more.

And another thing this week is I have just been putting out a lot of content. And I love to see when you guys are reposting the content because I can see that you like it then. And I know what you guys like. So it's been really nice to just focus on filming and I've had so much fun with it. Moving on to my current obsession. My current obsession is cottage cheese salads. I know you guys are probably like, what the heck is a cottage cheese salad? but it's just adding cottage cheese.

So like any bowl or salad that you make, I swear, it makes it like perfect, like extra like salad dressing type of like that. So if you have some like dressing, lemon and then cottage cheese, I promise you it will take it to the next level. I literally am obsessed. Another current obsession is putting on acoustic music right when I wake up. I found it so relaxing just to wake up really slowly. And I don't know.

It just makes my soul really. happy when I have acoustic music on. So I have been loving that. Another current obsession is my 10 to 15 minute power naps. I found it so helpful when I've had 10 to 15 minute power naps throughout the day if I'm feeling a little low energy and don't try to fight it. Like if you have the time, take a little nap and I promise you that will refuel you so much to continue the day off strong. And my last current obsession is just taking a lot of time for self-care. I found it so nice to just do my hour to two hour long skincare routine every night before bed. It just is so relaxing and I just love it.

Moving on to a goal of the week. So my goal of the week right now is to continue trying to figure out what my birthday plans are. It will be a few days before my birthday, which is the 17th. So I'm very excited turning 20. I don't feel 20. I feel like I'm still a teen, although I feel like I'm very much in my late 20. sometimes. Now onto a self-love question to ask yourself. What have I overcome that shaped me to be a strong woman? I love that question so much because it really allows us to reflect and see what

has shaped us and find our hardships and turn them into success. So I love that so, so much. Now moving on to our affirmation of the week, which is, I complete me. I love that so much. It's very simple, but I just love it because it says so much in only such little words. And I really want you guys to affirm, I complete me. Hello, dolls. I'm here with my mom today, and she's right beside me. We're actually recording this from my bed, and we are so excited to record. So without further ado, mom, introduce yourself.

Hi, everyone. I'm Cammy. I live in San Diego. I have three kids. Including me, yes. Including you. I have two older boys, so Jaden has two older brothers. The other day we went to a Rare Beauty event, which was so cute.

Rare Beauty invited me to celebrate International Women's Day. And I thought the concept was so cute. They had us invite our mom or someone who was really special in our lives. So of course, I invited my mom. And it was literally such a fun time. Oh, it was such an honor. It was so fun. What was one of your favorite parts of the event?

Oh, my gosh. I love when we were all lined up playing with makeup. I thought that was so cute. I love that too. I love that. What's your favorite product from our beauty? I love the skin tint. Yes, yes, that's what it was.

The skin tint is so nice. I also love their blush. Yes, I love it too. Oh, yeah, that's what I love. I love the blush. And then the cute little donuts. It was at the Bel Air Hotel, and it was just seriously such a nice girl's day. I loved it.

Anyways, I asked you guys what you would like to hear from us and what topics you'd like is to cover. So I put a question poll over my story. And you guys asked some amazing questions. I told you guys there is no questions that are off topic. You guys can ask whatever personal questions you guys have or if you guys need advice. So we are here to talk to you guys. And I'm so excited about today's episode.

I know. It's going to be fun. And let's honestly just get straight into it. Yep. Okay. So the first question is, how do you stay close to your mom? I try so hard with mine and all I feel is for pushing me away. Everyone always says to me it's obvious that I'm not her favorite.

It's my older sister. So what do you have to say about that mom? First of all, I want to say that that must be really hard to have to be feeling that way. But what I would suggest is what we do is we just keep talking. And I would think that the more open you are and just sharing parts of your life, it's going to make her realize how much you want her involved in your life. Definitely. And I think that it's really good to know that you've tried.

you're all to have a close relationship. People may not realize what you're feeling. So if you bring it to her attention, she may have not at all thought in that way, that that's how you were feeling, and may not ever want you to feel that way. So if you bring it to your attention, that can also really change something and improve stuff.

Yeah, I definitely, as hard as it is, you do have to tell her that that's how you're feeling because she may not realize that that's what she's even doing to you. Exactly. Love needs to be reciprocated. and if it's not, it's really important to realize that you should be content knowing that you've tried your all to have a close relationship. And if it's a one-way street, then that's how it is. And I think it's really good to just know the comfort of knowing that you've done all you could.

Moving on to the next question, what are the values your mom taught you? I think she's taught me so many values that I'm so grateful that she has taught me. I feel like I've carried on so much that she's taught me and they've now become my own values. I think one of my favorites is it's okay to not follow the crowd and meaning that in the way of if other people are drinking and smoking and I don't want to drink and smoke, that is okay. I don't need to fit in to feel validated. I don't need to get validation from anyone else but myself. I always felt the comfort of knowing that as long as I was happy with what I was doing, then that's all that matters.

I love that. It's really typical for people to want to drink and smoke, which I think there's nothing wrong with it. If you want to do that, then that is totally okay. Every one has their own preferences and what works for them. And it just is something that doesn't align with who I am as a person. And there's nothing that I'm against it for. It's all about preference. And I know a lot of people my age, of course, do drink and smoke and party.

And I've always thought, you know what, it's okay that I don't want to. So that's something that I have always continued keeping my. mind that she's taught me. Okay, moving on to another question. Was she ever strict when it came to dating guys? I feel like it has to do with personalities. I'm someone who never was someone who flaunted over guys. It was just naturally who I am. I was never the girl who always had a crush, right? I literally never was the type of girl who never had a girl. And when you did, I was like, oh, yay, I'm excited. She, I remember the first time I had a crush. you literally were like who's the person you actually were the happiest person on earth i can remember

the day so i think it was kind of easy for you honestly because i wasn't flaunting over guys where you had to be like okay hold your breaks you know found the breaks right now what do you think i didn't have to be strict with you because of that but also because of the fact that i was trusting your judgment i just know that you were the type of person to do the right thing but i also was lucky that you were open enough it with me that I could teach you the right thing. That's so true. I really did from the start of liking a guy to dating them and everything. I would literally tell you everything and I still do.

Like every single thing. Even in a relationship, I would say everything because I'd want her opinion on things. And I think it just is nice to be open and honest. We've always had an honest relationship. Yeah. In your relationship, your first relationship, I wanted to implement certain things, even if you felt they were okay that you were too young for. Yeah, that's true.

I mean, my first boyfriend was at 17, which I know a lot of people, they have already maybe experienced more things like dating or sexual activities at that time. But I really was a very child of God. I really didn't do anything, honestly, by 17. And I think you kind of just guided the way for me. I kind of tried to tell me, I trust you and everything. there wasn't a point or reason to put strict roles. Exactly.

I do remember something you were strict on me with, which was sleeping in the same bed. So when I had a boyfriend, again, this was like it was a first time for everything. So I remember being like, I don't see what's wrong with sleeping in the bed together if we're not doing things. I was living at my mom's house at the time. So I was living with my parents. I was not understanding why I couldn't sleep in the same bed as my boyfriend if we weren't doing anything. sexual. And I remember she would literally text me while I was in the other room, literally with the lights on, she would say, have the lights on and do not fall asleep together. And the minute you

fall asleep together, I will be so mad. Door open. Door open. And you guys better part ways before your eyes shut. And I remember being like so frustrated about it because I'm like, why? Yeah. But then again, that's me wanting to implement the rules. It just not something that's easily and casually starts happening at that young age. I mean, looking back, you feel like you're old when you're young until you actually are older. Now that I'm 20, almost 20, more reasonable at my age than at 17, but still at 17. I followed your rules.

I think as you go with your parents, they do loosen up to trust you in the person you're with. Right. Right. And as you grow in your age, you start realizing what you should and shouldn't do for yourself definitely and I think you also get to know the person you're with so and then of course as time went things changed and he was very respectful of that too yes yes and I think it's important to realize that when parents need time to learn about the person you're with so the more you're open talking about

the person you're with even though maybe uncomfortable talking about who you're dating or who you like having them around more it will allow your parents to feel more comfortable and trusting of them yeah definitely so that's something that I think. And one more thing is I think you were trying to be more strict to be able to loosen up over time than to be completely loose because you can't really backtrack and get stricter over time. You kind of just want to go ahead and first being kind of strict and then loosening up. But still again, you weren't that strict. Yeah. You couldn't have trusted me. I did. Next question is, is she the person you ask for for dating me advice?

100%. Again, it doesn't really revolve a lot of my life, like looking for. guys. Like I really, I never look for guys. I just have the right person coming to my life at the right time. That's what I believe. But if I have any dating questions or when I was dating someone, I would always ask her for advice over any friends actually. Well, she's my best friend. So I would ask her for all advice. I definitely would go for her for anything. Well, it was basic relationships stuff, like literally anything. Yeah. And it's not like you're not trying to fill your time with a guy. So it's not like a constant question asking for advice to me. True. It was literally only when I was in a relationship.

She's actually the best sounding board. Yeah, I just listen. No, you listen, but you also give such good advice. Also work as a great sounding board too because sometimes I'm just like ranting. Ranting about men. My career is my one true love. Okay, guys. That's how you have to trust the most. You're not trying to find someone. Yeah. Or if I talk about things I'm hurt about from like past relationships, I definitely talk to my mom about it. That's where I'm the sounding board. Exactly.

And I think she's taught me a lot where I would tell her things that have hurt me for my past relationship where my mom is like, you know, not every guy is going to do this or not every guy will have this happen. Not every relationship is going to turn out like that. So I think she's taught me a lot where, you know, even if one guy has done something, there's many more you can trust. Definitely. The next question is, why?

What is your favorite activity you guys do together? There is not like one specific one. I just, it's actually just being each other's presence. I agree. Literally just being with you. It makes me so happy. I mean, just that. And like, we kind of just like go with the flow of everything we do.

True. And it just kind of. Like me begging you take me certain places. And then you wanting to go to Starbucks. I'm like, I'm not a Starbucks girl. So we're running to two different places. Yeah, I'm like, let me get match out from an actual cafe that is good. Sorry, mom.

But my mom literally gets the same thing. Shout out the Starbucks order. All right, ready? I'm a Starbucks hater. Unless they want to work with me. If Starbucks, if you'd like to partner with me, I'm more than happy to. But you know what? Until then, I'm a hater.

Okay, so my order is Grande Vanilla Sweet Cream Cold Brew, In a Vente with Extra Ice, no vanilla, two pumps of caramel, two packs of salt on the side, but I only put one. And a large straw. Amazing. Yeah. She's getting those minerals. Oh.

No, it gives it a salted caramel taste. It does. It's actually so smart. Actually, I would have to say. is one of the best drinks I've tried from Starbucks. It's not too sweet. It's got a tiny bit of salty. It's perfect.

I'm a Starbucks hater. For multiple reasons. Anyways, something that I love to do with my mom is just try new food spots. I feel like 80% of our time. We're always trying to find some fun little new dessert place or food spot, which is so fun. I love doing that. We do get stuck on certain ones we continuously love. Yeah, what are we stuck on right now?

Airwant. Airwane. And then go Greek. Go Greek. Yeah, that's our one. We were stuck on the carrot cake at Air One for a little bit. We were. We were so good.

And just also having our little rituals are so fun. I love our little rituals. Whether that's like our little night routine or whatever when you're here. Yes. So just little things like that. Okay, the next question. So what's your favorite dish I cook? My favorite dish that you would cook for me.

When I lived at home was definitely the salmon bowls you'd make me. You made me, I remember, brown rice with salmon and broccoli and I remember devouring it every single time but now I feel like I make the same thing but I like enhanced it or I do like quinoa and like turmeric cauliflower. It's something that I will forever love that you made. What is one piece of advice every early 20s girl should get? It's kind of the same thing that's always said but it's so true that you actually just have to live for what you want and not what someone else wants because at the end of the day you have to be happy with how you lived your day. Yeah, exactly. Like you have to go to bed

at the end of the day, happy with yourself because if you're living for someone else or living to please others, you're not going to be happy in life. That's just the truth. And just being true to yourself. And you just have to be conscious of that because it's easy to say that's what everyone just says, be yourself, be yourself. But you really have to stop and think, wait, is this what I want to do right now? Or am I doing this because someone's wanting me to do it? Do I want to go here right now or is someone wanting me to go? So I'm doing it for them. Exactly.

It's like college. Thankfully, my parents were never forceful about college to me. They kind of believed if I knew what I wanted to do and let me go achieve that dream life. And honestly, it's working out pretty good. I'd have to say. But for instance, they were never forceful on me. Of course, they recommended things to me. But I think that has to do with like college because I know a lot of parents are strict about college.

What do you have to say about that? Yeah, definitely. I think a lot of kids try it and realize. they actually found something else that didn't involve college. And especially I'm meeting with their parents forcing them. That's honestly what they don't want to do. Then it's like, not saying don't listen to your parents,

but like try to have them listen to how you feel and you have to do what you want because if you're not happy at the end of the day, then what's the point of living? Yeah. Another thing is, is that I would say is use your single time wisely. Love how I'm giving advice to people in their 20s when I'm not even 20 yet. I mean, in a few days, I'm 20.

I would say use your single time wisely because you are going to most likely be married and have kids one day. You're going to wish that you had time to go back and use your time wisely to really have time for yourself. So I think it's really important to use that time wisely to care for yourself. Yeah, definitely. I agree with that. And for your career. As you know, I am so excited about spring. And I always say this, but the best thing to do is a spring reset. It's time to let go of whatever's not serving you.

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It's so nice. I always do it right after the shower. and don't get me started with their body scrubs, they smell divine. I always want healthy glowing hair and after using waste products, my hair is always glowing and looks so healthy. After I do a slick back bun, I feel like the perfect way to just remove all those oils and just really get a good cleanse is with their detox shampoo. It's literally the one product that I tell everyone about because I truly recommend it.

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I love that so much. I didn't know that. Yeah. Yeah, that's like really what I see every day. And you're living out what you said you were going to do. I love that because it's true. I do. I speak things into existence and I kind of make it a goal for myself, but I'm so happy.

Yeah. And I'm seeing you do what you want, not what other people are telling you or suggesting. So that's the most rewarding. Thank you. That came from you though. Listening to always be yourself and to do what you want at the end of the day. She also said, also she's done an exceptional job raising such an amazing young woman. That is so sweet of you. Really a true compliment.

Oh, so sweet. How have you guys overcome the teen years when things are on edge all the time? I would say we really never had that on edge teen experience of having a hard time with like our relationship. I do think, of course, we had the typical ups and downs of me being a typical teenager sometimes or whatever, like little comments and things. But I think we really never had that stage. No. It wasn't like we had a lot of problems that came up.

It was just little things. And again, we talked about it a lot. Any little problems that ever came up, we always just opened about it and worked through it. And I always think that it brought us closer whenever we had little things. And I think the teen years can be hard for all moms. moms and daughters. I feel like it's very typical. Like I said, thankfully, we didn't have that experience. But again, we still had our little times. And I do think whatever we had has brought us closer, knowing how to resolve problems and conflicts. Yeah. And I do think that with that,

teenagers feel one way, the mom feels another way or the parents feel another way. So they actually both need to try to open up to each other's feelings. Yeah, and listen to be mindful to each other. What was some of her favorite memories of you growing up and what was she doing at your age? Should I answer this? Yes. Definitely the memories that come up about you was you always were wanting to, you made little shops. You set them up, you set up tables, you had everyone over.

We shopped. Everyone meaning family. And I was like, babe, there's no family discount. I'm an entrepreneur. Give me the money. Yes. You collected the money. Everyone was buying things.

Yeah. And with that money, you actually donated to St. Jude's. And then probably when you were like, I don't know, like, I don't know. like 12 or 13, you made a dog bow. A little online dog bow business. And you sold quite a bit. And with that money, you donated it to an animal shelter. I did. It's all about giving back. I just love the hustle culture so young. It shows now. And, um, but yeah, those are some of the cutest memories. Oh, thank you. And what were you doing at my age? They asked. I was holding my son. Oh, my gosh. My oldest son, yeah.

Oh my goodness. Wait, I totally forgot. Yeah. She got married at 17. Sorry to expose you, but I mean, that was about 18. That's fine. That's fine. And I, time for a different girl.

So she got married at 17. You're pregnant at 18. Birth down 19. Girl. Mm-hmm. Baby in your hands at 20. Yes. Oh my gosh.

I'm like, I want to hold my bank account on my ass. My baby. But yeah, that's what I was doing. Wow. Oh, my gosh. Isn't it crazy? Yeah, I was being a wife. Cannot relate.

Okay. I think it's cool how you lived a totally different life than I did. I love seeing what I didn't do. Not that I'm saying what I did was wrong. It was just different. I love seeing you take a different route. And I love the fact that you took my advice and I wanted you to be an independent woman before you had a family. How do you keep a close relationship with your mother?

I honestly think that. It is just very natural for us. But I would have to say that it's very important to talk about uncomfortable topics. If you are trying to become close with your mom or are wanting to keep a close relationship, like get over the humps of feeling uncomfortable about talking about certain topics. Yeah. And there's a lot of times moms won't mention something, especially if you're like a young adult. They're not going to come to you and be like, well, tell me this, tell me this.

Tell me about your sex life. Yeah. But if you feel like maybe if I talk to my mom about this, she'll be. comfortable talking to me then. Definitely, definitely. Like, I think it's really important to also voluntarily share things that your mom didn't ask you about. Like, you can just start sharing details because that can also allow her to think, okay, it's okay to ask about those topics. And also, you can ask her about things in her life because it's really easy to act like where the main character. I mean, I feel like we all are in her own mind. I sometimes forget,

like, my mom has her own life too. Like, oh my gosh, it sometimes shocks me. I'm not, her main priority in life. Well, I actually am. Our moms are living their own life too. So it's nice to just ask them how they're feeling and what their day is. Yeah, definitely love that. The next question is, also I want to know her self-care routine. I definitely take my skin care routine the same thing all the time. Other times throughout the day, everything's kind of a little different. I always stop midday after certain things I'm doing to stop and relax and have coffee that I like to get. And other things just kind of build throughout the day that I do enjoy when I have time for. Definitely, definitely.

I love that. Another question is, how did having an eating disorder change your relationship? I think that it changed our relationship to become much closer, of course, because it was very hard. One of the hardest times I think we experienced together. Nothing changed. The funny thing is you just said nothing changed. I was going to say, it didn't.

It's not that it changed it. Look, I even wrote it didn't change it. Oh, I love that. It just made it, it just made us go through that challenge. With it, it also showed our unconditional love for each other. Yeah, it just brought us closer because it was definitely one of the hardest things we went through together. It was just a really hard time for me and, of course, for my mom to see me going through it. So I think it just brought us closer by the end of the day.

How has raising Jaden impacted your perspective on life? What I love that now as she's an adult, I am always reminded by her to always find the best in things. she'll remind me of that a lot. To be positive. Very positive about that. Positive attracts positive things. And there's a lot of times where I might say something negative and she'll stop me. And then she'll be like, wait, let's say something positive about this right now.

It does change the whole situation. It does. How do you solve arguments in general? I would say I always try to see from the other person's point of view and their perspective because it's really easy to be close-minded and only think you're right. And I think it's really good to be open-minded to hearing what the other person's feeling. So you can also show your side on how you're feeling as well. I feel like that allows you both to talk things out.

I kind of feel like our biggest thing is we don't let them last. Yeah. We don't let them last. So never going to bed, Matt. Right. You can get upset. You act annoyed or all act annoyed. Sits for a little while.

and then we apologize. We don't let it sit for days and days. Within the same afternoon, we discuss it. Same thing I did when I was in a relationship where I always made a priority to never go to bed mad whenever we had an argument because the minute you start going to bed mad whenever you're arguing, it can become such a down feeling. So I feel like that just is something that I think everyone should prioritize in all relationships. I think the longer you go on to something, it just starts affecting you so much worse than to

just deal with it the same day. Yes, I agree. This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. I remember the time I've learned something new about myself and it just is so rewarding getting to know more about what you like and what you dislike. And I just love learning new things about myself. Getting to know yourself can be a long life process, especially because we're always growing and changing. Therapy is all about deepening your self-awareness and understanding because sometimes we don't know what we want or why we react the way we do until we talk things through. Better help connects you with a licensed therapist who can take you on that journey to self-discovery from wherever you are. Something that I think is so beneficial when it comes to therapy is it's so helpful for learning positive coping skills

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Best friends. Any advice? Since it sounds like you guys are best friends, very similar to how my mom and I are, I feel she would probably be wanting you to be happy. And obviously, that means probably moving and, you know, starting your life. And I think it's really important to realize that a lot of times moms want the best for you. Because I totally know what feels to not want to move because of leaving your mom. like I remember sobbing, sobbing the week I was moving because I'm like, this is just so unfair to leave my mom like this. Like, we are best friends, like just not going to be the same. And obviously nothing changed.

I don't see her every single day in person. But like our relationship is just as strong. So what do you have to say on a mom perspective? Yeah, definitely. And I actually think this is such a good question because I literally at the time couldn't imagine you not living with me. and us being together daily like we always were. But once it happened, it was like it actually didn't even happen

because I feel like we literally are just as close. We talk just as much. We always pick up from where we left off. We FaceTime literally every single day. Exactly. And we're texting a million times out of the day. And we make it a priority to always be in contact. It's not even like we're putting out effort to make it feel like we still talk.

It's just like, it's just a natural thing to do. It doesn't even feel like you aren't with me. Exactly. And I think that's going to be the same thing about you moving with your mom. That I just make it a priority to continue talking to each other and FaceTiming and texting, which I think is just so important. Next one says, hey, Jaden's lovely mom. What's the most important value that you taught to our beloved hosts?

This one's super important to me because I've put a lot of time into this in you. And what I feel is I have taught you had. value yourself along with that, I have made you feel valued. I love that. Definitely like self-worth and self-value. You've taught me so much on. What has been the biggest challenge you have been through together? Love you, Jaden. Love you too. And I would say the biggest challenge would have to be either my sixth grade bullying experience or my eating disorder. They're both equally as hard, but in totally different shapes and forms. That's exactly what I was thinking.

Yeah. Those two times are the hardest. Yeah, those were each very hard. Each of those hard experiences, though, still brought us closer. And we learned so much about each other and so much about situations in life just going through that. So I would have to say those two. Yeah, and those, I feel like those two have really shaped you who you are today. How do I have a better communication with my mom?

since I couldn't tell her things about me. It's really good to voluntarily share, like I said before, voluntarily share details about your life because, again, she may not know what is okay to ask. Same with asking her things. And I feel like that can start conversation and communication. They can get over the uncomfortable stages of not knowing what to say, not to ask. Also probably doesn't feel like she wants to overstep and ask you.

So if you voluntarily start telling her, I think that she'll realize it's something that you're comfortable wanting to do along with her. And I'm sure that she would be interested in then asking you questions. The next question is, how did your mom help you with recovery? She definitely helped me in many aspects of my recovery. I think that it's so important to realize that nobody knows what you're going through when you've had an eating disorder unless you've been through it. and that was something that I think that she learned over time when helping me recover is she'll truly never know how I feel or how I felt. Same with I had to realize that since she has never had an eating disorder.

So I think once you get that and both parties understand that, so you can kind of take everything with a grain of salt because her comments, even though they were helpful in her opinion, could have been damaging to me. And seeing her wanting to help me recover was making me just so mad. and me hating what she was doing because all I wanted to do was not recover. It's kind of like you were forced into it, basically. Although, like, you didn't always want to accept that help. It was something that you were kind of forced into because it was a matter of life or death,

pretty much. So you had no choice. Definitely. And after. And I think it was also a plus that I was underage at the time, since I kind of, not that being underage changes. much but like I think like it scared me more of thinking while you are have more authority over me so you kind of have to tell me what to do so I think that made me really be like oh my gosh I have to

actually do this then so like I have to go to my doctor appointments I have to listen to you regarding what food I was eating I had to listen to you also you really supported me by truly asking how I felt not just necessarily making it all about okay let's see progress but more how am I feeling right now at this moment? Because I just felt so alone. And even though you couldn't really fulfill the void I was feeling, you were really helping me with just asking me how I was. And that really filled the void almost of how I felt alone.

And just encouraging step by step. Definitely, definitely. Just encouraging is a big one. And I remember you would do little things where we could go to this fun concert if you make this progress. So almost doing little like incentives. Incentives. Yeah. Another thing is when you do start recovering and getting that right nutrition, you actually start thinking more logically. Oh, definitely, because I saw my mom as the devil wanting to help me recover. When now I look back, I'm like so thankful that she was encouraging recovery for me because I wouldn't be here today, if not.

Next question, what are things you guys don't talk about? Literally nothing. Let's see. I don't think there is anything. There's not much of a filter. No, I'm like, I will just start. Yeah. I actually have no filter with my mom. Like, I will be saying the most out-of-pocket stuff, just, you know. Yeah. You definitely tell me.

I feel like nothing is too touchy or sensitive on both of our ends. We really say anything. Right. Which I love. Yes. And I think that's become over time, we've just become so comfortable. We've always been so comfortable. So if you're kind of like hesitant about talking to your mom about things like that, once you do it and get over the hump of just talking about it, it's easy from there.

Yeah, because you actually weren't as freely open as you are now until after you had a boyfriend. Then you like so freely open. I'm like, oh my gosh. Definitely. I remember being like so weirded out. Like, oh my gosh. Like, okay, this is getting off topic. But like I remember being so weirded out when I actually realized like, okay, I.

actually now have a boyfriend and like I had my first kiss and everything and I remember like how am I getting to frame this to my mom that I like I was excited to tell her but I also was like not almost like a slightly nervous not like what she would say but like because I knew she'd be so excited but I also was just like how do I frame this in words once you get over those small little topics it becomes so easy to talk about everything yep definitely so that's something I would say we don't really have anything off topic. Yeah. Okay. And our last question to wrap this up because this has been such a fun episode. I'm so happy that my mom came on the episode. Thank you so much for having me. Of course. But this is the last question. Mom, do you want to take it away?

What are your favorite traits you've inherited from your mom and how have you influenced her life? I would say my favorite traits that I've inherited from my mom is just her kindness and generosity to ask about others. She has so much care to know what's going on in my life. And sometimes, you know, it's easy just to answer. But I realize I've learned so much from her because I take the time to ask others how they're doing, what they've been up to, all because of how she has asked me. So I think her generosity and showing interest into my life has led me to showing interest in other people's lives.

But in return, I feel like you've gone over and above, even what I've taught you. I see you like genuinely ask people how they're doing. Honestly, like carrying your knowledge that you taught me running with it. So I think that's kind of cool. I love that. I also feel like I've influenced their life by the world and looking at food in a different way and looking at wellness in a different light. Do you agree? Absolutely.

Because I feel like I've actually taught you something. You have. You definitely have taught me things. Being a wellness girl, I feel like I've learned so much the past year and a half about wellness, gathered such a great interest about food and health after recovering from my eating disorder because I'm so fortunate for my health. I've shared a lot with her, and I feel like you've really enjoyed learning about it. I have learned a lot from you.

And yeah, I just feel like she's seen, like, wellness. in a different light. I do, and I'm still learning. Exciting to learn stuff that I didn't know. This was so fun. This was such a fun episode. I hope you guys enjoyed this episode. I had such a fun time with my mom.

Thank you for having me, honey. Of course. If you guys want to see more content of the Busy at Pretty Podcast in my lifestyle, go check out my Instagram, all linked in my show notes, as well as please leave a podcast review

over Apple Podcasts to be featured on next week's episode. I love you, guys so much. Thank you, Mom, for being on the podcast. Thank you so much for having me. And don't forget to stay. Busy yet pretty.