Busy, Yet Pretty - Stop. Being. Desperate.

Episode Date: May 22, 2023

Stop being desperate. Yes, you heard me right. In this episode your host, Jadyn Hailey shares how you're able to impove your mindset to avoid desperation in all situautions that occur in life. Whether you're desperate for a text back from your crush, desperate for your dream job or even desperate for compliments, this episode will teach you how to fulfill your own personal lack / void you may be experiencing. Tune into this episode with a matcha latte with cashew milk and a cucumber salad as you improve your BYP life.  My favorite drink at the moment Chocolate Electrolytes LMNT Make finding a doctor easy with Zocdoc My go-to clean beauty products Thrive Causemetics Jadyn's Social Media platforms: - Busy, Yet Pretty Groupchat    - Instagram: Jadyn's Instagram & Busy, Yet Pretty Instagram   - Youtube: Jadyn's Youtube   - Tiktok: Jadyn's Tiktok   - My Amazon Storefront: Jadyn's Amazon   - Shop my Closet on Motom: Jadyn's Closet Favs   - Lemon8: Lemon8 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hello, my dolls. Welcome back to the busy yet pretty podcast. I'm your host, Jaden Haley. If you are new here, this podcast is about all things wellness, self-care, self-love, and ultimately becoming the best version of you. Let's get into today's weekly review. So this week, my mom has been in town, which has been so nice. As you guys know, she's my best friend. And I've been really just trying to embrace the child in me because I just love it. I feel like since I moved. I really do feel like an adult and I always feel I've been more mature for my age. Although I feel like since moving, I've been like full adulting because, you know, you're on your own. You have to do your own things. And when I have the chance to feel like a child again, when my mom is here, I embrace it. We went to Universal Studios. I just lived out my little child in me of going on all the rides and everything and it was just

so fun and needed. Another thing this week is I had a rare beauty event that I went to, which was so fun. We did a floral arranging class and I honestly felt in love with my little floral bouquet. It was so fun. I feel like I just love little crafts. Since I was little, I've always been just such a DIY girl. I was such a Bethany Moda Stan. She was my YouTuber that I watched from day to night every single day.

And let me tell you, I just was love. loving the little craftingness and it was so fun. Another thing this week is I've been really off schedule and something that's really good to acknowledge, especially if you have been off schedule, is that it's okay. We are not going to always be perfectly on schedule our entire life and we don't want to be. We need to have time to be flexible and have sporadic moments to occur in our life for those experiences and we're not supposed to have a picture perfect schedule. Yes, it's great to have the majority of the time, have a very planned out schedule so we can stick to routine. But of course,

the 80-20 rule is to have flexibility in that 20% of your life should be sporadic moments and times that are not planned. I have just been off schedule and embracing it and not trying to fight against it. And I know I will be back on schedule soon. Moving on to my current obsession. My current obsession is the St. James green ice tea. I am just such a tea girl. I love tea. It's so good for you. And it just tastes divine, whether it's matcha, green tea, peppermint tea, ginger tea, lemon, everything.

I love iced tea. And this one is so specifically good that I get from Airwan. It's literally the best. Another current obsession is pretty bags. I love me a pretty bag. my goal is to have a brickin or a Kelly bag or you know what why not both and I just feel like the bags are so beautiful it is perfect so I've been trying to get bags that are kind of similar not duplicates or anything or replicas but just similar styled bags and I am just obsessed with them another current

obsession is my Skylar perfume I absolutely love clean beauty products as you guys know their perfume is clean beauty and I just love it because this scent in particular, the boardwalk delight, smells like cotton candy. I don't know how they do it, but it literally smells like someone dissolved cotton candy and put it in a bottle. And that's the perfume because it smells like so sweet and sugary. It smells divine. Lastly, my current obsession is fresh fruit. I have been loving fresh fruit. It just tastes so good. And it feels like summer whenever I eat fresh fruit. So I have just been loving watermelon. strawberries, bananas, everything.

I love fruit. Moving on to my goal of the week. So this week, I have been trying to do this, but I really want to make it a goal to do it from now on, but is to tape my mouth. And I know that sounds so weird, but to add mouth tape every night before I go to bed is so important and it has so many health benefits. And I am so gross, but I am a mouth breather at night. So I need to start taping my mouth.

There's so many benefits. It's really good for you. So I have been using band-aids to tape my mouth. I'm going to buy some facial tape tab at night that I can do every single night. And when my mom has been over this past week, she's been laughing at me so much because she says I look like a mummy with my mouth clothes. And sometimes the band-aids will become like undone. And then all of a sudden, there'll just be a band-aid flying around my face in the middle.

the night. And I just find that so funny. Another goal of the week is to be consistent with my daily steps. I find it so good for my mental and physical health to have my daily steps in. I've just have been making a priority to have my daily steps in and really try to continue that. Another goal of the week is to begin doing an at-home lymphatic drainage again. I haven't done it for a while. And when I was, my body felt so good and felt so light. So I really want to start doing a lymphatic drainage again at home. If you want to start doing it yourself, you can literally just buy a, I think it was a $6 $1,000 lymphatic drainage paddle off of Amazon, which is so inexpensive and can make you feel so good.

I've been looking for a really nice makeup brand that has both clean ingredients and it's cruelty-free. That's where I found Thrive Cosmetics and let me tell you guys, I am obsessed with their mascara. I use the mascara every single day, whether I'm doing a full makeup look or just a really natural look, their mascara lasts all day long, which I love. I love how it's easy removal and just slides right off with warm water in a washcloth that requires no soap and lasts all day long without any clumping, smudging, or flaking.

I absolutely love Thrive Cosmetics because I think clean ingredient products are so important, especially if you're using them every day. They're certified 100% vegan and cruelty-free beauty products that are made clean with skin-loving ingredients. No parabens, sulfates, or fallates, all without compromising performance. Also, I love how their name is ThriveCausmetics, cause meaning a purpose. As a part of their mission, every purchase supports organization in one such as homelessness, which is very important to me. You have to try Thrive Cosmetics to see for yourself. Right now you can get an exclusive 20% off your first order when you visit ThriveCosmetics.com slash pretty. That's Thrive Cosmetics, C-A-U-S-M-T-I-C-S dot com slash pretty for 20% off your first order. Another goal of the week is to enjoy nature. I'm going home for the week and I'm so excited because I love nature and it just is so nice to

lay outside, hear the birds, not hearing horns every 10 seconds. Don't get me wrong. I love the city, but it is really nice to just embrace nature. So I'm really excited for that. Moving on to an affirmation. I am glowing from the inside out. I love that affirmation so much because it is so true to affirm that we are glowing from the inside out and I really encourage you to journal that affirmation.

Now moving on to a self-love question to ask yourself, how do I care for the inner child in me? I love that question so much and I really encourage you journal that question because it is so important to really acknowledge how do we care for the inner child in us? Moving on to a challenge. I challenge you to make a press juice this week, whether that's celery juice, ginger, lemon juice, juice, juice something at home and you'll be. so proud of yourself. Lastly, is a podcast review. This review is from Joanna and Joanna said,

When I started listening to Busy at Pretty, I was a 16-year-old ghetto girl who felt like she had to fight through every day. My brother had a drug problem and I was frequently skipping school to take care of him. Since I found Jeanne's podcast, I've improved my life so much. I'm studying nursing, I prioritize my own happiness and education and I truly feel like I'm loving life. I cannot think her enough. Joanna, that review meant so much to me. And I love how you reflected that you were fighting through every day and now you're able to just love life. That makes me so happy and I'm so beyond proud of you.

I just love to hear your guys as busy yet pretty lives and how the podcast has helped you. So if you want to be featured on next week's episode, feel free to leave a podcast review over Apple Podcast. Without further ado, let's get into today's episode, which is Stop Being Desperate. Yes, you heard me stopping desperate. This episode applies to anyone. Whatever your situations are, this can be your overall life, jobs, relationships, friendships, co-dependence, or whatever personal situation that you can think of. Desperation comes from extreme lack and it is so important to realize that.

When you lack something, you can become desperate. Let's say you're not getting attention at home or not giving yourself enough attention so you may desperately seek attention from others. let's say you make no money right now and there's a job that you really want you may be desperate for the job so bad that you'll start begging to be hired for the job whether you're desperate in your head

or take action in your desperation you will receive based off of that belief which is lack you will not begin to attract what you're desiring and what you actually want you have to realize that nobody and nothing likes a beggar when you expect you deserve something

both in your mindset and how you portray yourself to others you will receive it. Many people have imposter syndrome, which is when you don't feel you deserve what you're receiving or you don't feel worthy of something that you're wanting. And a lot of us can experience imposter syndrome when we're lacking self-value and self-worth. And that all ties into desperation. If I have to be honest, I've never actually struggled with imposter syndrome

because I've been always super confident that I deserve all that I've received, receive, and will receive in my life. And with that mindset, you're going to avoid ever being desperate. Self-worth, self-value, and confidence all tie into desperation. You have to stop signaling to your brain and to others that you are in such desperate need of something so bad. What you're doing is you're putting your desire on a pedestal. Let's say it's a job opportunity or maybe you have a crush on someone. Whoever has the power to fulfill your desire, you're giving them too much power and putting them on a pedestal.

That makes it easy for an opportunity or for someone to think that you're tied around their finger and they have the ultimate decision of your feelings. Example, if you have a crush on someone and you're just begging them to like you, they know, well, she likes me regardless, so I don't have to like her back right now or give her any attention. But if you show your interest and then take a step back and let it go from there, that shows, wow, she has boundaries and she has respect for herself. when you are on your hands and knees begging for something, that is not attractive, whether this is for an opportunity, for someone to like you, or for anything in general. People like what aligns with them.

People like stuff that has power. Why would you choose something that is powerless? If you were giving someone the power of your emotions, showing how desperate you are for something, that allows them to know that they have control of your emotions. Think of the boy that you may like right now. Think of him for a second. If you're messaging him multiple times a day and waiting for a response and continuing on messaging him,

that gives him the power and the upper arm in this situation. He knows that regardless of whatever action that he takes to show you attention or to like you or to not like you, you will like him regardless. But if you message him with confidence and leave it at that and not portraying lack of attention from him or showing so much consistency where it looks like you're desperate, that will attract him to like you back. You may not realize, but desperation all begins from how you think. When you know you're the best and you deserve the best, both in your mindset and how you

portray to others, you will attract all the opportunities that you're desiring. Yes, it begins with the way that we think. But where does it actually stem from? It all stems from how you view yourself. From confidence. This comes from self-worth. This comes from the value that you have for yourself. You have to work on yourself image and how you value yourself.

As I'm recording, I'm currently drinking my little drink of the day, which is my chocolate element electrolyte drink mix. I found myself getting such bad headaches the past few months and I eat very clean. I would like to say and I realize I am lacking sodium and since incorporating element into my routine, it has helped so much with my brain fog, fatigue, energy, and so much more. Element is a tasty electrolyte drink mix with everything you need and nothing you don't. What I love is that element does not contain any sugar, artificial ingredients, coloring, anything that is unhealthy and unnecessary.

I use it. Moms can use it, exercise enthusiasts, big sweaters after you go to the sauna. Everyone can use some element. All you have to do is mix the flavorful electrolyte drink mix into your water bottle and you're good to go. I want you guys to try out Element yourself and if you don't like it, element always gives your money back. So I have a special link for you guys to get a free element sample pack with any order that you order through the custom link. The link is in the show notes. Again, a free element sample pack with any order using the link in the show notes.

Another thing is boundaries. Boundaries are all tied to desperation. If you are showing lack of boundaries, you were giving off energy of being desperate. When you display to someone that you would do anything for something or someone, you are in desperate. mode. Let's say there's a job opportunity that's paying $20,000. But that job entails you have to fully clean someone's house and donate all your clothes to them. I assume you do not want to donate all your clothes. So for boundaries, what you would do is negotiate those deliverables in that task. If you ask them, I'm more than happy to clean their house, but I can't donate all my clothes. That is showing self-value and self-respect. Yes, you may want that $20,000.

but you do not want it enough to donate all your clothes. And let's say they're not willing to remove that deliverable of you giving away all your clothes, then you would politely decline. But a lot of us tend to have the fight or flight mode of thinking if there's one opportunity, that's the only one that exists. You have to have your mindset believe that you will receive that exact opportunity at a different time and a different form. You can't constantly be in yes mode.

Yes, that $20,000 opportunity sounded. great. But guess what? You set those boundaries. You politely declined. In another job opportunity walked into your life that is $50,000. You will receive what you believe you're worth. If you view the boy you like as the only perfect boy that exists, if he's not liking you back and you're continuing to like him, you are in desperate mode because you have to realize there are more boys that are perfect. I'm sure he was not that perfect if he doesn't like you back because you are perfect. Think of the job opportunity that you're wanting. Let's say it's going against your boundaries a bit, but it pays really well. You have to realize you're going to find the

same job opportunities just with a different company. Stop viewing something as the only thing and the best thing. That will stop allowing you to have a desperate mindset. Desperation is not only in your head, but it projects outward on how you portray yourself to others. Desperation portrays to others when you put them on a pedestal or give them more power rather than you displaying self-worth for yourself and your value. Let's be honest, we've all been there where we're worried about our health problems that we have, and we almost resort to texting our group chat to get advice from, which is a reality check that our friends are not doctors. But thank gosh, there are better ways to get answers that you want and the care you deserve from trusted professionals and not just random people on the internet.

Zoc Doc helps you find expert doctors and medical professionals. that specialize in the care that you need and deliver the type of experience that you want. Zoc Doc is the only free app that allows you to find and book doctors where patient reviewed, take your insurance, are available when you need them and treat almost every condition under the sun. And when I'm not feeling my best,

especially living away from my parents, I'm just trying to hold it together and finding great care shouldn't take up all my energy. That's where Zoc Doc comes in. Using their free app that millions of users rely on, You can find the right doctor that meets your needs and fits your schedule. Finding a doctor that actually cares about your needs is definitely difficult. And when you find that right person, nothing feels better.

Luckily with Zoc Doc, you'll find a doctor that truly cares about what you need and how you feel. Book an appointment with a few taps in their app and start feeling better faster with Zoc Doc. You can find the right doctor that meets your needs and fits your schedule. Go to Zocdoc.com slash busy and download the Zocdoc app for free. then find a book a top-readed doctor today. Many are available within 24 hours. That's Z-O-C-D-C dot com slash busy. Zoc-D-O-C-com slash busy.

If you had self-worth and valued yourself, you would not be chasing a person or opportunity, so in need of. You would know your worth that that person or that opportunity or that thing is not any better than you and you deserve it. that will allow opportunities and good people to flow to your life. Desperation is all because of how you view yourself. When you're viewing yourself with confidence

and you're reflecting on yourself and seeing all my hard work deserves this job, you will get that job. If you are constantly unsure of yourself and constantly viewing something above you and putting things on a pedestal, you will never receive your desire because what you receive is what you believe you deserve. So I hope this episode left you with a clear way to think of things, items, people, opportunities, and a full, abundant mindset that you're deserving of every single thing that you want,

rather than viewing everything as in need of and a lack of. It's very normal for us to have a lack of mindset and desperately want something. But when that happens, the further away that opportunity or thing is from us. In order for you to bring in the life that you want and the opportunities and the people that you're wanting, realize you deserve it. Take credit for your hard work in life. Take credit for who you are as a person. Start loving yourself. Love your reflection.

I hope you guys love today's episode and I had such a fun time talking about this topic. I adore you guys so much. If you guys want to be a part of the Busy Yet Pretty community, feel free to join the Geneva group chat where you guys can discuss all topics. that we discuss in the podcast. Feel free to follow my socials, Jaden Haley and Busy at Pretty if you want to see more updates on the Busy at Pretty Lifestyle. And please don't forget to rate over Spotify and Apple Podcasts to help boost the show and

bring in more of a community. I love you guys so much. And I hope you guys have a lovely day. Remember your worth and that you deserve everything. And lastly, do not forget to stay busy yet pretty. Maw.