Call Her Daddy - 1 - Sext Me So I Know It's Real

Episode Date: October 3, 2018

Follow along vlogger Alexandra Cooper and best friend Sofia Franklyn as the duo dives into the explicit details of their life in NYC. In their 20s, the two exploit the f*ck out of their lives, making you feel a hell of alot better about yours. Relationships, sex, the NY social scene, embarassing moments, and weiner holes are all addressed here on CALL HER DADDY.

do you call him daddy do i call her daddy call her daddy ho ho ho merry christmas bitches it is call her daddy episode one um first of all i just want to go ahead and say you probably have no idea who we are and that is okay because we are nobodies that's probably why i bet everyone listening either you your mother your neighbor's dog you've all got a podcast at this point honestly we were just feeling really fucking left out and we were like let's get on this podcast train yeah it's kind of hot i like it so i think we should first introduce ourselves like we said no one has any idea who we are so sophia bring who you are to the table right now oh god this is gonna be a short intro

because who the fuck am i um my name is soph Franklin. To be honest, I'm probably here just to ride Alex's coattails. I work a 9-to-5 job at a finance firm in the city. And, you know, I think a lot of this is going to be us just talking about our day-to-day lives and the shit show that's happening when you're in your 20s. This is going to definitely be a shit show.'s happening when you're in your 20s this is gonna definitely be a shit show my name my i can't even get over how i sound on this mic you guys it's all new to me my name is alexandra cooper i am a stay-at-home try hard vlogger by day and an insta hoe by night can i get around to a flosser myself you know that's what every girl wants in their life. I'm an insta-ho. Okay, so for Call Her Daddy, Sophia and I have only known each other for, what, six months?

Yeah, I think exactly six months. We met each other because we needed roommates, and we met each other. The day that we met each other, we signed a lease, and we went out and got hammered that night together. It's a beautiful thing called love. And it's just been a wild ride. It has. These past six months have been more of a shit show than my college experience.

Living with you has been an actual trip. So get right into it, Alex. No, I already know. I can tell you want me to go right into what happened last night. Exactly. I'm cringing. If you're alluding to it, just go for it. Let me just first say that we are in a studio right now with guys staring at me and i'm like men hold your

horses and get ready for what we just did last night all right so i'll get right into it so i'm talking to this guy and we've been talking for like a little bit last night sophia and i just decided to get drunk there was nothing there was no reason. Sophia has her job today. Again, I get to sit on my couch and do jack shit. But Sophia had to go to work today. So last night, we're getting hammered off whiskey. Classy, baby. So we're getting hammered.

And, you know, when you're drunk as a girl, you need to be texting a guy. There's got to be one guy in your phone, one specific guy that you're texting at the time and so sophia and i start texting this guy and you know when the liquor starts flowing baby things got a little hot and heavy a little sexy oh dear god if my parents are also watching this turn the thing off now dad because this is where you're gonna lose all respect for your daughter okay so um you know that thing millennials do it's called you know texting or or sexting if you will when you're drunk let's just get right into it so we start you know sending some unwarranted texts like this guy's not even trying to be creepy he was being nice no no the conversation started off just like hey how have you been and you're like do you want to fuck me or what we're like not exactly like that but

basically and i just want to let guys know on a little secret if you're texting a girl and you're like, do you want to fuck me or what? We're like, not exactly like that. But basically, and I just want to let guys know on a little secret, if you're texting a girl and you guys start sexting, just know most of the time girls are texting you with a pack. No girl is sending you a text and being like, I'm alone in my bed and I'm thinking about you right now, baby boy. No, no, no. We've got the crew. It's like, girls, read this before I send that shit.

It's like you send out a questionnaire and you're like, check yes, this is brilliant. Check no if it's not. Let's fucking go. The five of us, we're all brilliant. What's going to turn him on? You pass that shit around. So last night, I'm tight, oh my God, like talking about his dick and this and that. And I throw in, you know, the classic, like, I wish you were here right now.

Fucking my tight little pussy. Yeah, baby, let's just break the ice. I feel like that's a classic. Yeah, it's a classic. But then I also know my whole friend over here, Sophia, is a goddamn well-good sexer. Oh, wow. So I'm like, girl, take take a look how does this look and sofia out of there is no hesitation sofia takes my phone and it's like i can't even believe you would you

would dare almost send that text without adding that one adjective i love the most and i'm like what the fuck is the adjective sofia go ahead the adjective was warm and i thought that warm was gonna take this fucking sext up 10 notches don't ask me why to the next level so what do you end up writing so like i wish you were here fucking my warm tight little pussy and so if you're like my god i couldn't even imagine if you sent that without warm i know and at that point i like, what other fucking adjective should we like? I'm my tight, little, flirty, cute, fun, ambitious pussy. I'm like, why did we need to throw every adjective in and give him what he needs? So at that point, I'm like, OK, this guy is in love. I got a boyfriend and he lives across the country.

So I'm like, you got to keep that shit entertaining for him. And that's not even the worst part of the story. That's not the reason I woke up this morning saying, well, you know, this is why I'll probably never hear from this guy again. I wake up this morning and I'm looking at you because you I have never seen Sophia Franklin leave faster in the morning than she did for work this morning. You've never been happier because you knew I had some beef with you. Oh, my God. I want to cry. So I wake up in the morning and I will admit I and you can kind of back me up here I'm that girl that I will black out anything if I don't want to remember something happened I'm like

no I never dated you if I dated a guy for a year I'm like no I was I was comatose that entire year I wasn't there I was black out so I can usually just black things out but this guy I'm still talking to and so I had to reread the text I I'm like, what the fuck did I say? So I start reading our texts and I'm reading the whole warm and the tight. I'm like, God, he loved that shit. No, no, no. Oh, I'm going to call you the fuck out right now because we haven't even talked about it. So, guys, I look at my phone in the morning and aside from the hot sex thing that went on, I remember I left Sophia my phone and she decided somewhere in her blackout state that this statement that she wrote him. And I swear to God, guys, I've read so many sex in my life.

I have never heard a girl. No guy. No. Turn this off. Now. Go ahead. Yeah. Tell them what you wrote to him.

I know you remember. I need to preface this with. Yeah, I'm a psycho but i came from a good family a good home normal you know you're trying to give your little backup i haven't been exposed to you know crazy stuff um something happened in that blackout where i thought it would be the sexiest thing in the world to say, these are my exact words, I want you to degrade me. Not hot. That is not sexy. No guy thinks that that's fucking.

I'm looking at the guys in the room. They're like, dude, what the fuck? What is wrong? What kind of porn are you watching? Like, baby, I want you to degrade me. Pause. Oh, my God. Pause.

Oh, my God. Yeah, thanks. Well, that was on my phone. No, of course? Like, baby, I want you to degrade me. Pause. Oh, my God. Pause. Oh, my God. Yeah, thanks. Well, that was on my phone. No, it's yours. I know. Thanks, baby girl. I feel so bad for you. Why would you give me your phone?

So the worst part is I'm reading this and I'm like, hi, I want you to degrade me. Like, where do we go from there? But the saddest thing is, like, he kind of went with it. And that's where I know I'm never texting him again. And this is the thing. I want to know from guys. Yeah. Would that turn you on?

Because I'm going to guess one out of 99 million guys would be into that. And I'm praying to God. Now I'm thinking about it. I'm praying to God that guy was drunk because as I kept reading guys, he said some weird shit about like spitting in my mouth after that. And I was like, yo, all right, dude, maybe you're a little crazier than I thought you're welcome you're welcome yeah now he thinks I'm this kinky little minx and I'm like so by the way and I know he watches my vlog so he's probably gonna listen to our first podcast and be like so you're basically sexting Sophia you're not sexting

Alex Cooper you're literally sexting Sophia so that went down last night and I realized from then on moving forward if you guys any guys that actually follow me that went down last night and i realized from then on moving forward if you guys any guys that actually follow me want to dm me and let me know what your response would be if i texted you and i said i want you to degrade me actually now i'm thinking about my bad guys you're like oh yes alex actually probably don't put that on your fucking insta story we're gonna get all the creepers of the night coming in hot no and you know what i wanted to yell at you this morning but i think karma kind of ate you in the ass because on our way here in our uber sophia realized something that's the most embarrassing this this story is we've all heard stories about getting blocked blocking people no you know i have to say though

before you go forward i haven't heard that many stories about people getting blocked when i moved in with you six months ago i have never seen a girl block dudes like she's just going p like you're like oop blocked he sent me like a hey what's up but i wasn't in the mood so blocked like you block people like it's your job it's crazy so go ahead i have i just get trigger finger happy okay so tell them the story sophia yeah so i've been talking to this guy um we were like really into each other so a few nights ago again there's like a few cocktails involved and we got in a little tiff i didn't think anything of it people get in fights and i was trying to play the whole like you know i'm not gonna like answer

him if he tries to reach out blah blah blah he doesn't try to reach out so you know i give him a little uh phone call like two hours later he doesn't answer the liquor keeps flowing 10 phone calls later 10 phone calls no you know no answer. 10 texts. And I have to say, though, you know how girls are in the morning like, I cannot believe I called him 10 times. Sophia's like, no shame. And then I called him 10 times. Yeah. No, wait.

Sophia, that's not normal. No. And then the next day I was like, oh, my God, I'll just call him like 29 more times on my lunch break because nothing shows how in love you are than fucking blowing up someone's phone it's true you have an interesting affection he's he's really not giving me the time of day and i started to genuinely feel like shit about myself and i'm like we had this great thing going i don't know what the fuck happened and this was for this was almost for two days. And then that's why, that's also why this was into the day of her sexting for me. I think that's why you took such a personal interest in my sexting life.

Because God knows you weren't getting shit on your phone. No, no, no. I'm like, whoa, I'm not sexting anyone. So we will be sexting someone. So we're about to ask to get degraded. Baby, let's go. Fuck me. Yeah, absolutely.

And I am not shitting you on our way here i randomly decide to just look at his contact info i don't know why the fuck i decided to do it probably because i'm psycho and i have the option to unblock him to unblock him guys she has been sending green texts to me like, this motherfucker turned his phone off. In my drunken state, I had blocked him, pissed off in the middle of our fight, had no recollection, and thought I was getting ghosted. You ghosted yourself. I ghosted my fucking self. Is that a thing?

That's, I guess, we made it a thing how does that even happen dude your face i swear to god guys we're talking we're trying to talk you know the podcast on the way here and sophia's like guys they can't get old like yeah how is a guy ghosting me like come on i'm hot like i don't deserve that shit i wasn't that crazy i'm like sophia you called him like 20 000 times meanwhile little do we know he did not get one text one call nothing god only knows what he's been trying to tell you he he may have been calling and texting he probably was honestly and there i am sitting in my room being like wow you're a disgusting piece of shit i think that is though what you get for the amount of people that you block it's the first person i ever blocked was my most recent

ex and i've never even like had to fraternize with the whole idea of blocking until i met you you're the one that actually told me to throw up the block and you know what though i have to say because this generation is hilarious the way that we interact via social media and texting etc because i think to myself i'm like normally you have to talk to your ex about whatever i blocked my ex i'm at work one day and i get an email from my ex so you throw that shit like i'm like blocked bitch and like no no no i blocked you on my cell phone you think that'd be enough i have an email and the subject line is hypocrite and i'm i shit you not within the next three days i love a great subject line subject line hypocrite and i have a

i have an email 101 emails later i decided all right let's fucking unblock this bitch because dear god i don't want to go into gmail anymore dear god that and that is like and i know people have like talked about this quite a bit trying to reach people on different platforms i was gonna say hold on let's give sophia franklin a moment to talk about so again you're the queen of blocking i want you to take our listeners through because you know what girls and guys if you're worried you know oh my god he blocked me or if you want to block them but you still want to talk to them. Let's turn it over to Sophia to take it up the crazy notch and tell us when you block them via texting and calling. How can you then move forward?

And how have you talked to the guys that you're talking to? Not through that way. That's the great thing about 2018 is there are a fucking million ways to talk to people i thought venmo was a crazy way to try and get my ex to notice what the fuck was up then i realized that this guy is obsessed with fitness and eating healthy and you best believe my fitness pal app became my new go-to i was like what's up you've had 28 carbs today and i'm sliding the fucking call me now unblock me like glad you ate that yogurt hit me up when you're done baby boy because i'm here and i'm ready dude i remember we're walking back from eating our fat ass is eating some 99 cent delicious New York City pizza.

And Sophia goes, I don't know. He's just been a little distant lately. It's like one of the guys she's talking to. I'm like, all right, you're crazy. By the way, he's been blocked for like a week. Like this is a normal thing. Like Sophia just blocks and unblocks. Yeah.

And she goes, I'm not going to lie to you, Alex. Let me just tell you, I stalked his Venmo. And I'm like, dude, what let me just tell you i stalked his venmo and i'm like dude what what do you mean he stalked his venmo and you're like and i saw that last month he paid this girl and i have to say i'm a little concerned yeah and so i'm staring at her i'm like no no i don't like i don't understand and it wasn't the subject so no it literally i think it was like a pizza emoji but this is the thing and this is where you're really gonna think i'm crazy is that's where you have to catch them because they're fucking off guard and they don't think that you're paying attention to their venmo and you're like hi babe i'm in and around the venmo

let's hang out whatever you thought you okay yeah this is this is why i love living with you because you teach me the tricks of the trade last night and i think honestly this is where you catch some guys we're talking and sophia just rattles off you're talking to a guy you're talking to and you go babe like in the cutest voice too because sophia has her little valley girl voice and she goes babe like can you give me your apple id and password and i'm like oh i'm like okay i was like 80 joking 20 i just want to see what i can make him do you're like i just wanted to check in like see what he's doing so moral of the story was we are we are absolutely crazy i don't think we're we're

sitting here happy about it no no and that's what i'm afraid of is coming off like we're wearing it as a badge of honor i'm i want to fix it i want to work on it i want it i want to re-listen to this shit and be like this is there's some changes that need to be made i mean i think when you admit that you're going onto your fitness pal app and you're checking after his yogurt, that's when I'm going to slide in. You know what? We're staying accountable. We are. We're being honest.

But can I just say, and this is where, all right, like you said, we're not wearing it as a badge of honor, but we admit girls are out of their mind. Girls are crazy. Can we just admit that guys can be crazy too? Just a little bit. Just in their moment of weakness. And let me say this. This is what makes, well, okay, maybe it isn't crazy. It's just you're obsessed with yourselves.

You're annoying. Okay, so what was it? A couple days ago, you know, I don't have the biggest data plan at my father. If you're still listening to your God, turn it off. But can you get me a bigger data plan? Thanks, Dad. So I've got to delete shit on my phone.

I'm like, okay, I've got 10,000 000 pics it's time to reel it in alex okay guys when i tell you that i have on my phone more dick pics from my most recent ex than i do selfies of myself on my phone I am not kidding you the amount of times that guy thought here's a Christmas present baby girl wake up and smell the morning dick like I got that shit on my phone so much that it was almost like and I know it's so and it sounds like I'm exaggerating I'm not yeah I could go out in New york city and give everyone their own individual unique album of my ex's dick it's like one for you one for you which is so crazy because how can you get that creative with a goddamn dick right girls have very very like we have options you can hit the back shot the v shot the tit shot you can even take a selfie with just your face if you're, you know, feeling it.

Meanwhile, guys, it's either like you take a pic of your abs and your dick or it's just your dick. And if you want to throw in a soft dick, which he actually sometimes did. Okay. Honestly, that's art at that point. That is. That is art. It is. It is.

He's being artistic. And the funny thing about that is my ex was the same fucking way like dick pics up the asshole okay that sounds okay that sounded backtrack backtrack no but i think guys think okay and this is actually if i can give any advice to anyone listening because i know sometimes on my instagram people have reached out to me and they want advice my first line of advice to a guy is if you are in the beginning stages of talking to a girl and I mean you can correct me if I'm wrong I think it's so gross when a guy just ran like out of nowhere you're not sexing nothing just randomly throws in a dick pic hi baby girl I mean a dick isn't the cutest thing well that's interesting you say that because I feel for the most part girls talk about a dick pic like it's disgusting every single time.

It's never appropriate. Honestly, if a guy sends me a great one and we've been dating for a while, I think it can be hot. No, listen. It really can. You can love a good dick pic once in a while. In a blue moon, absolutely. Throw me a nice dick pic so I'm like, wow, that thing's thinking about me this morning. Thanks.

Thanks. I love that. Love that. The weiner hole. His weiner hole. Dude, Sophia and I have this weird. Up and alert. Sophia and I have this like weird obsession with, guys are like, okay, like his dick,

blah, blah, blah. Sophia and I love the word weiener we're like it makes people feel uncomfortable i never thought anything of it until you're like you say wiener very weird okay i'm totally calling you out here i think it's because didn't you tell me that this stems from okay i can't even say it just fucking say we're just getting exposed one of your exes used to send go ahead tell you i know it's that's how we thought i'm literally gonna like pull up a video right now he would use permanent marker and put two little dots above his wiener hole so he so he

writes two two dots as in their eyes and yes And the wiener hole is the mouth. Maybe that's why I started talking about wiener holes, because I didn't know you could turn a wiener and a wiener hole into a fucking talking character that says howdy ho in the morning. Honestly, I just have to ask, why are you guys not married yet? Right? And that's what I say, and I know I just said it, but I'm like, doesn't that kind of make you feel like he loves you? He is obsessed with me. He had to get up. He found the perfect Sharpie.

He made the eyes so cute. And he said that knowing, like, baby girl's going to love my little wiener hole. I think there may have been eyelashes on the eyes at one point. Yeah, I actually loved that one. I do like him a lot. And shout out to you because I bet you're going to listen to this. little wiener hole i think there may have been eyelashes on the eyes at one point yeah i actually loved that one i do like him a lot and shout out to you because i bet you're gonna listen to this but that is unique as fuck and that's something that i'm like hey guys like my ex would never think about that and i think that's something that you well well well i think that's something that you and i have actually talked about a lot is the difference between your ex versus my ex and i think it's almost one of those

things where i think a lot of girls talk about like my ex back in the day like our most recent exes are so polar opposites we could do an entire podcast about each of them i mean that's just a perfect example he wants to send me a video of his wiener hole talking to me oh my god you know my ex you're so insecure and that's just like the little like okay you know what how about this is how they're different my ex thought it was the sexiest fucking thing if i would fuck another guy in front of him let's just hold on he thought that was the hottest shit that i could do i see the eyes i see the eyes in the room i think i think we need to we need to pause on that for a minute because i'll admit so when i was growing up i was always i felt socially like a

little bit ahead of the curve i always was like doing something and i'm not saying mom mom i'm not saying i was doing you need to leave your parents out of it oh my god please i'm not saying mom mom i'm not saying i was doing you need to leave your parents out of it oh my god please i'm not saying that i was doing crazy shit i just always felt like my friends came to me for advice because they thought i was like i knew what i was doing when i met you sophia and the shit that you brought to me i'm like oh wait hold on me and my ex were just just doing like having sex you're like my ex really was telling me, so he wants me to fuck this guy. I'm like, hold the phone. So your ex genuinely,

and I need you to clarify again one more time because I still, your ex wanted you to fuck another guy in front of him. Yes. Well, and that's the other component to it is he was like, honestly, if you were ever to hook up with a guy behind my back, I'd want you to be honest about it.

But if you do, please bring it the fuck up while I'm having sex with you. Because, like, if you give me details about fucking him while we're fucking. That's the hottest thing. The hottest thing you can do. And I'm like, you are. You're out of your fucking mind. Like, can you please imagine my ex? Your ex-boyfriend would fall to the ground sobbing.

Die, die. And be like, Alex. I thought we. No. And that's what I'm saying. Guys are so different. When you brought that up to me, and I know now that I have to think about our listeners, guys, when Sophia told me this, I legit was like, dude, hold on, hold on, hold on.

One, he's like, oh my my god my dream is to watch you fuck someone in front of me and then two if not it would be so dope if you did fuck a guy that when you come full circle back around to your homeboy when we're fucking hi babe talk about that shit like that to me that take but you know what that takes a specific kind of man because he is so confident in himself yeah and i think he's probably the best you've ever had let's be honest he's the best ex i've ever had hands down not even a question and i think that's crazy because i've always told you it's like if a guy looked at me the wrong way in the club my ex was like we're leaving oh my god get in the car i love you so much i'm gonna cry

like yeah and i'm not trying to shit on him i'm'm just saying, like, my ex versus yours, very different type of people. He's a child. Okay. I love him. Let's just, you know. Threesomes. Yes. Threesomes. I'm going to say nine out of ten guys wants to do a goddamn threesome.

That's every guy's dream, I feel like. Two girls, you, whatever. The two girls hooking up with each other is so hot. So hot. No, no, no, no, no. No, no, no. Not enough. Was I dating a normal man no a threesome was not enough i couldn't just be like babe like look at this super hot girl and

of course he would think it's hot but he told me dead serious he's like there is one thing that i want to accomplish in my life before i die and it it's an F, F, F, M. Now, please explain that to our listeners. You know, in the kinky world, Alex, come on, get with the program. It's three girls and one guy. And I'm like, you know, what the fuck? Do I just start cold calling bitches and be like, you know, I just have an unlimited amount of girls.

I can just come fuck us like let's go let's just get the line going god damn legit you got like two two extra girls yeah i'm like let alone one holy shit babe let's do a threesome it's like no of course and i remember you asked me and you're like yeah and the girls have to be like super hot I'm like we could grab two homeless people off the side of the road and he'd be like wow let's have a time that's actually you know what I don't even know if I'm allowed to say this because I mean I guess I can I'm not using any names so when I was dating my ex we were obsessed with this show and it's called impractical jokers and it's these guys and they do crazy shit around New York we were obsessed with the and it's these guys and they do crazy shit around new york

we were obsessed with the show we thought these guys are great then one of our girlfriends told us that she knew one of the girls that is dating one of the guys and i'm here learning about your life you know and i'm taking it all in and then here and behold i find out that this is kind of a normal thing some couples do this crazy shit. A lot. What they told me was he was so into her fucking other guys, which, again, to me is so foreign. But so let me give you an example of what they told me. So they would order pizza.

They would have no idea. They would just know if it was going to be a man or not. And if it was going to be a guy, he would say, you know what the mission is. She would answer the door. No. No. And her job was to lure him into the apartment, get him to like, you know, start talking to her. And the end goal is, I want you to fuck him the pizza delivery man

in front of me once you're done he leaves then we will get into a giant fight about how you're a whore and you're a slut and you're this and that and then we're gonna have fucking nasty makeup sex okay so they do like a pretend fight about it

it's basically role playing except the poor pizza guy Alex you're gonna tell me you haven't thought about fucking the pizza guy that kind of delivers us the deli man that we always go to that hates us oh no we're gangbanging him eventually we've already talked about our landlord no i'm i'm just saying i'm just saying it's so crazy to me because to involve other people like that pizza guy is probably like oh my god i just had the bottom and he's walking out god damn if i could get that number meanwhile this is just all part of their little little get together they're trying to do and so he and again oh my god it is kind of

degrading to a woman but i guess if that is something i understand role playing so if that's the most extreme role playing like you said you're having four your your boy wants four sums baby we're taking it all the way pizza man let's bring the cheese and the breadsticks and oh by the way did you bring a condom because let's fuck hi i think this shit is way more common i mean people don't openly talk about it you know until now what's up call her daddy episode one baby let's go no you know what it's true people don't talk about it but there's definitely every so I've never had a threesome in my life I'm putting it out there hello everyone in New

York City and anywhere else I've never had a threesome Alex Cooper um but I've definitely talked about it with my exes multiple exes sounds a little funny oh wow um so I've definitely talked about it but I knew that my most recent ex we talked about it and it was like there was so much jealousy in that relationship like if like i said a guy looked at me the wrong way there was no way he was gonna be okay with watching you with a guy or even another girl i think because he was like oh my god you're my angel you're my princess i think like we're in our 20s so we don't feel the need if i've been married to someone for 15 plus years i might kind of be like fuck the fucking

let's get out man let's just do it no and i think i we've we've even talked about that week and i know we're not even at that age so it's not even kind of that relatable but there is a there is this point in your life where you go uh babe how do we spice this shit up but i want to just say that that kind of reminds me that like we're talking about how we're doing crazy shit and like it is kind of crazy but guys love the crazy they we're sitting here saying i am on record right now men love the crazy don't try and tell me you don't because you fucking do you can pretend that you don't you love it you love it it is and you know what if if you're dating a guy that's a little bit old like in like 40s 50s maybe they don't love the crazy anymore because you know

that they're trying to tie shit down and they're trying to no no okay never mind no no no never mind i don't care if you're 90 on your deathbed. You like the crazy. It's just, it is what it is. It's definitely. And it's not good. It's not cool. I'm not being like, oh my God, it's so fun. It's fucking.

No, it's fucked up. So like I said, Sophia and I live together. We live in New York City, but we have, we have a third roommate and she's doing great things with her life. She's getting her PhD and she's going to things with her life she's getting um her phd and something we know nothing about she's becoming a doctor and saving lives and we're over here talking about dick and whatever assholes but so she's getting uh her phd and so she's had a boyfriend through college and now until now sofia and i sometimes have to spend time alone because she's always working but when she's home

I think it's kind of a reality check for us how freaking crazy we are yeah and again I want to I want to reiterate we are not proud of the crazy no um and I think sometimes her name is Lauren Lauren almost brings us down to earth sometimes because there's always that one friend that's like I'm not calling her the mom of the group. Hi, Lauren. I love you so much. But you always, she calls herself the mom sometimes because she's like, guys, you are threatening to hack into this guy's iCloud, ruin his life, and expose him to TMZ in five minutes. And we're like, oh, yeah, we exactly know how to do that. What are you talking about?

She's like, no. No, no, no. Guys, it's, because we sit there and we come to conclusions. Let's talk about that. I think half the reason that we act crazy is because we have a little too much fucking time on our hands. Let's be honest. That is when girls start to act crazy. It's true.

It's not even insecurity. It's not even like whatever. I'm so bored. Let's talk the shit out of him. It's like I just want to start some crazy shit because I'm so bored. Half the time I'm a little like, Sophia, why'd you do that? Why'd you start that fight? And she's like, I don i don't know i was bored let's go get food yes and and this type of crazy is i feel like but then there's another level of crazy which alex and i know this guy

super hot super successful like multi-millionaire guy could have you know any girl any girl super hot um and he's been dating this girl and she likes to dabble with you know ambien and xanax and alcohol you know just your just your nightly nightcap like whatever cute so cool she's a great time let's be real and uh she went on Facebook and I saw this firsthand and started posting about how his company that he, you know, his joy and pride and love in his life is taking over people's brains and hijacking their brains to buy the company's product. And this is not in a vindictive way this is in a she genuinely was on some ambient trip and is like oh my god she thought there were little video cameras and little speakers and like recording shit in her apartment so now my natural reaction as a man would be like okay so this girl has gone onto a social platform and she is posting that my company is ruining people's lives and i'm hijacking you i don't i don't know i actually haven't even asked you the end of the story, but let me guess.

Because there's two options. Either he's never talked to this girl again or something great's happening. Go ahead. Tell me. What are they doing? They are on a yacht in Cuba and I can't make this shit up. They literally posted a picture the other day and they're frolicking

in love and she genuinely thinks his company is taking over her brain and that's how I know. Facebook he's going to ruin your life and he's like oh my god baby. He's like you know what if that's your marriage material then I don't know what the fuck is. Let's go and he pays for everything. Let's get on this

fat yacht baby girl and let's sail away together. Yes they love the crazy. So how can a guy expect us to expect anything other than we want to be crazy i want to be on the fucking yacht yeah all right so you know i didn't think it was crazy enough let's get on facebook for my own well-being i feel like i want to tone it down i think i actually do too i think we can both sit here and agree that call her daddy episode one we've talked about how we're crazy but we're getting there it's almost like a therapy session guys i love that you're hanging out with us you're listening i hope you guys can relate to a little

bit of what's going on um next week we're gonna come back and we're gonna hit you with episode two i hope you guys enjoyed episode i think you enjoyed episode one i mean i'm sure there were probably like eight or nine people that listened to this and i love that but you know what guys it's not about the numbers it's about the time you had and what you felt downstairs while you were listening yeah so next week all three of you next week listen we're running out of time which is beautiful i didn't know if we'd had enough content but i want to just say next week i'm calling sophia out because on the way here we actually started talking about her little cheating scandal so if you have some great uh cheating stories and we're gonna get into that next week so i hope you guys come back and listen and but for now and for the record no i'm not

proud of cheating and i genuinely will never cheat again but the way that i got caught cheating will blow your fucking mind because i've never heard something like this in my life so please bear with us it is pretty fucking crazy and so you guys well you'll have to come back and listen for next week but until then thank you guys so much for hanging out with us listening to call her daddy episode one i hope you guys hang out with us next week and call her daddy call her motherfucking dad you