Call Her Daddy - 45- Post Sex Tape Regret

Episode Date: July 24, 2019

In this weeks episode, Alex and Sofia recap their staycation experience at an old NY hotel and it is TERRIFYING. They also discuss nonconsensual sex tapes, when to know and accept you're just a fuck, and groupies taking pics of the men they just had sex with….while they are asleep. Last but not least, introducing the PSTR-Post Sex Tape Regret. It's a wild ride :) Also, they surprise the daddy gang with an added iPhone recording. 

do you call him daddy do i call her daddy call her daddy what's up everybody it's call her daddy back at it again for another episode it's hump day it's alex and sophia it's charlamagne and Charlene. Back at it again. Again. To just cause some fucking ruckus. Hi, everyone. Currently recording this part of the intro on my iPhone. It is 3.30 in the morning.

But this listener question was too good to not have kick off the episode bringing you some international flavor take it away alex hiya girls it's big daddy g all the way from sunny england love the show i've been listening for a few weeks and gotta say you girls are great my question for you both is is eating ass classified as cheating i have a long-term girlfriend and she will not let me eat her ass she just says the thought of it makes her gag and feel six but me i love it it's been three years since i last ate ass and lately since listening to your podcast every female female I see, and I mean every female, young, old, chunky, skinny, beautiful, not so beautiful, any race, any color, all I think about doing is eating their ass. Would it be classified as cheating if I ate some ass?

No pussy, no sex, just my tongue going down to brown town. Many thanks, Big Daddy G. Big Daddy G! Big Daddy G! town many thanks big daddy g big daddy jay big daddy jay well well well i well well well big daddy g you see maybe he can set up like a glory hole situation okay uh-huh and like he'll go up to a wall and there will just be an asshole and he gonna stick his finger in there and like get it over with i think he wants his face in there sweetheart he wants to oh he wants to see the whole thing he wants his face he wants tongue inside of the ass literally nose in the ass crowd cheek to cheek cheek to cheek okay some brown town on his face when he leaves there yeah he's into it

and he wants it is that cheating i don't know i'm gonna say it is cheating but i'm also gonna say like your girlfriend kind of sounds like a prude and a stuck-up bitch and you should be like listen up sweetheart listen i will be putting my face in that you're gonna like it and that's final yeah listen it's not horny if you're cheating so like do whatever you want to do right right but the truth is is that i think a lot of times girls get freaked out by it because they're so self-conscious that the boyfriend is going to be so grossed out has this guy done all the things he can do like let's take a shower and then do it like has he tried i mean can this girl is this girl really gonna be self-conscious if she's one scrubbed and dubbed? Exactly. It's one thing if he's asking her to eat his ass and she's not into it.

But baby girl, all you got to do is lay there. Yeah. Fucking turn on a Netflix show, put in some headphones and let him go to town on that asshole. Pretend it's your pussy. And honestly, if he's bothering you this much with it, don't fucking clean it. Right. Show him.

Show him what he's in for. Fucking show him. Don't shower for three days. And be like, you asked for it. Take a massive dump and be like, you want, this is what you wanted? Then let's go. Come on down to Browntown, you little bitch. That's what I would do.

Big Daddy G. Let us know. Give us updates. Thank you so much for that one. I'm excited. Let's recap. Okay. For the daddies.

I'm wearing a dress right now and my vagina is on the seat. Clit on the seat. The next man that comes into the studio is going to give a... Her clit and vagina, it looks like a masterpiece.

Don't get pregnant. You never know. We're in Barstool. You never know what sperm is laying on these chairs. Okay. So let's tell them about this past weekend.

Oh my God. Let's tell them about this past weekend. Oh my God. Let's tell them. Let's take them back. Let me fucking tell them. Okay. Alex and I went and stayed at a hotel. Yep. This hotel was in Midtown, New York.

Extremely outdated. It looked like it was built in the 1800s. Which is funny because we actually stole the company card to get this hotel. So you'd think we'd stay at like the Four Seasons. We were mistaken. We thought it was going to be nice. It wasn't fucking nice. No, it was so old.

And you know, I'm not a history buff, but I want to say the 1800s. Love that vibe. We were making jokes all day about how it was haunted. Just little creaks and cracks were happening. Noises. The vibe was a little off. But we weren't taking it seriously. We were joking.

Right. Well, knowing Alex, she was probably kind of dying inside. I have this horrible fear that someone's always trying to kill me. Alex suffers from severe paranoia when it comes to that. Okay. Okay. So, we fall asleep. And I have my headphones in and I wake up to Alex on top of me not in a

sexual way not in a hot way literally backing up kicking her legs out in front of her with a blood curdling scream and I know Alex and I are drama all the time and we like dramatize everything and exaggerate this is not an exaggeration like backed up on top of me woke me up screaming bloody murder and she puts her hand out in front of her and points across the hotel room and is like there is a man in here like there's a man in here at which point you can imagine that I actually almost passed out by being so terrified I look into the hotel room I'm like holy shit there's someone in here like we're dead oh my god I don't see anything so I'm like Alex Alex and Alex is like there's a man right there and I'm like screaming like I'm surprised that

like no one came upstairs to check if we were okay yeah so then I like finally see it there's a man right there and i'm like screaming like i'm surprised that like no one came upstairs to check if we were okay yeah so then i like finally see it there's no man finally i still swear to god that there was a man in that room i don't know what i saw you're like alex but there was no i'm like i i have never seen you and you were just like i'm so sorry sophia like Like, I'm so sorry. So at that point, I was like, I will not be sleeping for the rest of the fucking night. So any normal person would be like, Alex is having a night terror, sleep paralysis. I get on my phone and I spend the next two hours looking at every single review of the hotel on trip advisor looking for

keywords haunted ghost man haunted ghost man there's nothing i type in haunted new york hotels like i went down a hole of research i love that you're that good of a friend that you're not like all right this bitch has had a very bad nightmare you're like she's got to be onto something right it has to be haunted that's how much i believe i'm like she saw a man she saw a man whether he was alive or a ghost it was it was so bad that we had all these plans to get room service in the morning ended up packing up all of our shit and fleeing the hotel guys we both were like trying to pretend that we were gonna get sleep at this point it was like 5 a.m and then finally we both rolled over and i'm like i'm not a sleeper you asleep and she's like fuck no we're like let's get out

of here i called down to the front desk oh god ask the guy if he had ever heard of a haunting in the hotel he was like um excuse me no i uh just started working here two weeks ago two weeks ago so you i have fucked up his job he's gonna have to like be closing something at like 1 a.m. and be like, I am terrified. I remember that woman called out. Guys, it was one of those things. Actually, we actually ended up vlogging our whole time in the hotel because it was supposed to be a great experience when we stole the company card. We were bawling out.

So that will come out in like two weeks. You guys can watch it. We're not fucking making this shit up. No. It happened. Sophia was terrified. I was terrified. Terrified. I thought it was over for us I just love that like a normal person would chalk it up to a nightmare and we're like full blown exorcism of Emily Rose happened in this very room yeah yeah guys not I mean the hotel Le Meridian fuck the hotel i'm saying their name because i am so annoyed lay

meridian can i i'm gonna say the quesadilla thing oh here she goes i there was okay we ordered room service there was a late night menu and we ordered at 11 p.m the late night menu went to an went into effect at 12 yep i ask if they can make me a quesadilla you guys don't know what a quesadilla it's fucking it's a tortilla tortilla cheese cheese a lot of people can make it oh a lot it's very simple it's not that hard it's not i called down and i asked if they can make it you know 30 minutes early for me okay the lady says, oh my gosh, let me check with the chef. Comes back, says, I am so sorry, but we cannot make you the quesadilla until 12. Sophia's face on the phone looked at me like.

Aren't hotels like they're supposed to try to like accommodate the guests? No, Sophia is like shaking. Sophia was so rattled about this fucking quesadilla i want to be like can i speak to the chef and i'll tell him how to make it literally i'll go down there anyways so our arcs uh yeah it was very interesting we're alive we're fine there was no man there was no fucking quesadilla we don't know there wasn't a man there was a a man. Shout out Le Meridian. Yeah. Fucking. Anyone that wants to have us for another hotel that can actually make a quesadilla.

Hit me up. Hit me up. We'll come for a staycation with you. Woo. All right. When to know and accept you are just a fuck. We have talked about how to not catch feelings. Yep. The episode was called You're Just a Hole.

Yep. I'm proud of that one. I'm really fucking proud. And then we've also talked about finessing a fuck boy. But now we're going to talk about how to know and accept that he is using you for your vagina. Absolutely. Jesus. It's a tough, it's a tough topic to hear.

Yeah. It's a tough pill to swallow. It's a tough pill to swallow, but it needs to be fucking said. A huge amount of the questions we get are from girls being like, I can't figure this guy out. Please help. Like, I think he likes me. And it's like, sweetheart, he likes your vagina. And that's about it. Not you. You could wear a plastic bag over your head. He's not going to fucking front. He doesn't give a fuck. Yeah. I think the sad thing is girls are so fucking good at ignoring the sign yeah and the thing is it happens to all of us none of us are immune absolutely not i will never forget i was a freshman in college and i started

messaging with this senior he was the captain of the hockey team at Boston University. So like, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,

oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, Every Tuesday, every Wednesday, it was like T's pub. T's? T's. It was called T's. T's. Like a T. So I go to T's. I show up and I see him. We hadn't been texting long. So I show up. He starts treating me like we're actually engaged.

Royalty. The queen of England. I am fucking Kate Middleton up in this bitch. Okay? Oh, oh, oh, oh. So, and he's doing the whole thing. I'm standing in between his legs as he's sitting at the bar. He's getting me drinks.

You're like, oh, I like that. He's giving me drinks, shots. I'm meeting his friends. And I'm like, this is so fucking cool. Fast forward to that night. We go back to his place. I'm like, I am in in this bitch. I don't have sex with him, but we do everything.

But, oh, lame. But love a classy bitch. And so we hang out. It was amazing. And he's telling me all the right things. Oh my God, hang out again this was amazing you're so hot oh my god blah blah fast forward to that weekend comes up do do do do i show up to tease pop i see him i beeline for him i'm like round two let's go i'm so excited he's standing with another alex 2.0 oh and um i kind of like swerve little it's because it's because you didn't fucking it's because you didn't put out no everyone else putting out

is to keep his attention fuck off i'm kidding so no so i go up to him he's like oh hey literally as if i'm just like a homie a bro and he's like oh yeah like we're gonna go get beers like are you gonna get one too, won't pay for my drink. Did he ask you to get drinks for him and his girl? Yeah, he's like, hey, you want to go get a picture? I'm like, not really, but okay. And the whole night revolved around me. Yeah.

Realizing that every girl has that one night. Yeah. And then after the hype goes away and you're no longer that new fun bitch, it's miserable. Yeah. I literally felt as though I was a fucking clinging ass bitch. And I was watching all these girls that were, it was me on Tuesday. And now there are 12 other girls that were now going to go home with him. And I was so mortified and terrified.

Right. For the next few months, you're like, no, that one night we had like that couldn't have been nothing. No, it was a connection. There was there was a connection chemistry sparks flying and it's like sweetheart that was four shots of tequila that was for such a tequila and like literally he was just trying to fuck you fucking ghb he put in your drink okay so sad sad pathetic yes girls start clinging to anything yeah anything cute he does dude i'm sure that someone listening has fucking caught feelings for a guy this guy has her sucking his dick in his car yeah you're in his fucking 2011 honda accord you're sucking his dick you're like

this is the moment this is what i'm gonna hold on to and then he never calls you next week because the new bianca is sucking his dick a little bit better right she puts the seat back for him so he can really recline and feel it you didn't since when is a dick in your mouth the equivalent to like chivalry i used to think it i don't know i used to always give head and be like this is it yeah not anymore i'm educated all right so if you exploit yourself okay you gotta embarrass yourself but this the really sad thing is yours was when you were in college mine was like a couple years ago oh i like a few years maybe like three years ago okay tell us tell us i was just saying that girls cling on to anything cute he does yes okay so let me give you a fucking example did you cling she clung i was i i almost just said

dating oh like i'm still in fucking i still haven't gotten over it okay we were never dating he's literally like please stop please he's like sophia it's been five years why are you still saying well we didn't have sex you You're like, so we were dating. I was going to, no. Okay. We were fucking. Okay. I'm glad.

We were just fooling around. Okay. And there was a night and he was like, hey, Sophia, what if we just like stay in tonight and watch Netflix and order food and just have like a chill night at home? Ooh. In my mind, I was like, oh my God. Oh my God. We are taking this to the next level.

This guy really, really likes me. We are doing the most couple-y, cute shit. He wants to spend the night in with me oh my god like it must be getting like are we boyfriend and girlfriend he just wants to spend the night in do you know what a night in means it means i don't have to pay for dinner for this stupid bitch it means oh my god this is amazing i don't have to put forth effort and sofia will still come over here and meanwhile you're like literally we are so close we are closer than close I'm like he wants to lounge with any girl he wants to lounge and get takeout living that's that is how delusional and I like to think of myself as you know somewhat

that is the thing girls you have to pay attention to the stuff that he says he's going to do and repeatedly doesn't i think actions speak louder than words if he's telling you three different times yeah we'll go to this sushi spot sushi spot and he has rescheduled this date night three times sweetie you are never getting that california roll you're gonna be eating taco bell every night in his bed. And that reservation is shrimp tempura. And it's showing up with the postmate. You are not.

And just that thing. There will never be a waiter in your presence, you dumb bitch. Fuck, that's so sad. I'm talking to my past self, you dumb bitch. You dumb bitch. Another example. Oh, here we go. With this same guy.

Oh, Jesus Christ. My friend was coming to visit me in new york and it was going to be her birthday and i let the guy know who i was hooking up with and my friend comes into town we go and meet up with him and it was really cute and really sweet he had a birth him and his friends all got a birthday cake for my friend who they had never met before okay and like saying her happy birthday okay a normal person would be like okay like he's a really nice guy like that's super sweet i was like looking at rings on pinterest and i was like there he might propose he's like hold on he might fucking propose like he did this for my best friend what is is he going to do for me next?

The ring is coming. Meanwhile, he's like, bitch, no. I took that and I genuinely was like, oh my God, we are like official together. And then I'm pretty sure later that night he went home with another girl and I was like, whatever. You're like, but the cake. Okay, so moral of the story is it happens to the best of us and we need to talk about this sign yes if he is only wanting to hang out late night so after his night has wrapped up

and he couldn't fucking find another girl right exactly wrap it up and fuck you or raw who knows who knows how much he cares raw dog fucking raw dogger that's a good one and also if he only wants to hang out during the week so like so like monday through wednesday let's yeah he's like come over and then when the weekend rolls around it's as if you're like jared where did you go buried you're done you're done you're like jared he doesn't even know you exist exactly also i think a huge one is if it's always on his time huge so if he isn't answering you that much sometimes and ghosting you but then all of a sudden he shows back up and he's like hey sorry you've been super busy like you want

to come over tonight and it's like it's not planning for even tomorrow or the next day it is always the immediate on his time oh the last minute plan is so true so true and then if you ever ask him like hey oh my god if you ever ask him to join you at like some type of work event or family thing and he avoids it like the plague you're just a whole whole you're just a whole let's talk about after you fuck he promised you that you guys were gonna spend the night and watch a movie and a lot of times after you fuck he gets up and he comes up with some excuse yeah you know i think the boys are gonna come over i think they're out in the living room i'm gonna go like drink with them you can obviously like stay here if you want but like i'm gonna be out there and you literally

are laying there with like cum on your stomach and you're like yeah yeah i'll catch up with you hold on and you're like fuck yeah fuck if he asks you to leave in a roundabout way yeah you are 150 a vagina for him to fuck absolutely okay my ex boyfriend told me what he would do i think I've talked about this on another episode. After he was done fucking a girl. Yes. He would get in his car, drive out of his neighborhood, park across the street. Shut the fuck up. And wait.

Stop. For the girl to leave and watch. And once her car left, he would go back home. Another one that's a little bit specific is if it's your birthday and he knows it's your birthday and he doesn't get you even a fucking rose petal, even a card. Yeah. Anything. Yeah. You're just a fuck. Because if a guy likes a girl and it's her birthday, he's going to make sure.

Or if like you're expecting like, hey, like we're going out tonight for my B-day and he's like oh happy b-day like that's fun like what are you gonna do and he's not trying to be included yes because he's not trying to be there with monumental moments for you because he's like absolutely not yes you're not my fucking girlfriend and you're nowhere even close to it and he's like and your vagina does not have a birthday so yeah wait i love that he's like pretty sure last time i checked the giant is on birthday so don't care fuck that congrats congrats see you next week when i'm horny at 2 a.m yep girls let's rattle some off oh he never pays for shit ever he's like yo let's split this let's split this like quick can you get this he kind of like avoids if you're trying to snapchat he like literally throws himself over a balcony before he's in

because like one of the bitches he's also fucking like follows you or some shit and he's like he's like he's like i know i'm not really a celebrity but there's this rule where you have to lock up the phone when you enter my house you're like what if you're over at his place and either his parents or his friends call you by the wrong name they're like stacy and you're like it's rebecca and then you're just a hoe dude that sucks anytime a guy says like i'm going through a lot right now just so busy with work like can't sorry i can't commit right now anytime a guy says he's not a fuck boy oh fuck boy this is the rule of thumb yeah i want all girls to hear this if you are questioning it yeah he probably is using you for sex i agree i genuinely like if there's anything off yeah because you will know you will

fucking know if he likes you should i read the quote read the quote okay people are gonna get upset this is a quote from oprah winfrey shut is it really i didn't know that okay but does it matter okay it doesn't matter if a man wants you nothing can keep him away if he doesn't want you nothing can make him stay i'm gonna cry if a man wants you nothing can keep him away if he fucking likes you you have no question about it because this is the thing men don't play games really with girls that they like and let me explain that because we tell you girls play games play games play games but men play games when they're trying to finesse and get your pussy so they're gonna do things to get in when they like you usually guys aren't like okay i'm not gonna text

her back too soon and then i'm gonna like blow her off tonight no no no that's girls girls are crazy guys that like you are not fucking playing crazy games with you yeah so you will know if he wants to fucking wife you up. So when you feel like he's playing games, it's because he doesn't want you to find out that he's using you for your fucking voodoo clam. It's fucking true. That voodoo clam pussy. Instagram.

One of my favorite topics. Same. It never gets old. It doesn't. At least for me. Nope. Never. Because every day there's a new

annoying as shit thing happening specifically this week folks and i probably do it too but no you don't you don't do this mushy instagram couples horny couples stop it stop some conversations should remain private some things some pictures some words yeah some thoughts some feelings yeah should remain private stories we don't all need to really know certain things the other day okay i was scrolling Instagram and I was looking at this girl's Instagram page. She has like seven, maybe 600,000 followers. Decent following. Love that. Drop dead gorgeous.

Drop dead. That's why I look at her profile. Yep. So I can fucking. Feel like shit. Cry at night. Okay. And she posts a story and it's of her boyfriend and of her son okay that she had

with a different man not that it matters okay the story is of the boyfriend and the son and they're playing a game at the fair okay she writes on the story and i quote i am so turned on right now watching this and tags her boyfriend and throws it up onto her page you know let me go off okay let me go off here let me go off go off queen i don't think that someone should should ever post their sexual arousal. Ever. And let me just point out, the kid is old enough to read and understand what's going on. So this child is going to have to see that his hoe-ass mother is getting a little fucking wet downstairs because her boyfriend is playing a fair game with her son.

Cool, mom, cool. That is so inappropriate. And why? downstairs because her boyfriend is playing a fair game with her son it was cool mom cool that is so inappropriate and why why if you should be private dude the world doesn't need to know how horny you are it really doesn't no i i just so when she writes that what i think is oh i'm so turned on right now so she's standing at the fair with her fingers up her fucking skirt masturbating watching her fucking boyfriend if she's saying she's so turned on that means that her vagina is getting wet and swelling and the clit is getting bigger and she's ready for a penis to go inside and i don't want to think about her anatomy no well the vagina while she's at the fair with her son you're supposed to be thinking about

the care bears and the ferris wheel and everything but your fucking vagina lips yes i don't know i think we could really do without you can say this is so cute you do not need to announce that you're turned on nope yeah nope nope yeah yeah reel it in or knock it the fuck off there's another girl i follow oh and she will post a story with her head placed on her husband's shoulder okay cute i'm gonna i'm gonna you know what i'm gonna be like that's so cute they're in love right she adds oh this this is my safe place no This is my nook. That's so fucking stupid. Why is that your safe place? My nook.

My little nookie nookie. Cookie bookie. My little nook. Oh my God. Okay. When people act like this on Instagram stories, it's the equivalent of when you're in public with someone and they're doing flat out PDA. Can you imagine if you were at a dinner with me and if I had a boyfriend and my head was resting on him. I'm like, he's my

nook, Sophia. If you looked at me and said he's my nook, I would be like, hey, by the way, Alex cheated on me last night and sabotaged your relationship and cracked a bottle of wine over his head. No. I don't even get mad at you.

I ruin his life this dude no my nookie no my little no my safe place your safe place is his armpit like the equivalent of a safe room like concrete walls an alarm system like if someone if someone went to rob her like my safe she's like quick armpit no i go quick there's a murder she's there's an intruder give me that armpit give me that armpit baby let's go i'm safe bulletproof vest up in this bitch my little nookie wookie i don't want to see it i don't my fucking god that is hilarious yeah you don't we don't need to see that fucking either people lose sight of what should be posted publicly even the instagram bios it's like when they're talking to their their partner and it's like do you guys want to just like write this in your diaries or

like write a letter to each other and give each other because like when they're like this past year we've seen ups and down trials tribulations things have gone wrong we fell in love we've seen the world we've tried and i'm like this seems a bit personal for you know becky that follows you but she met you in high school and you haven't talked since becky doesn't want to know that and then and then the boyfriend texts her and is like yo what do you mean we've had a lot of ups and downs like what are you talking about what she communicates with him more on instagram than she does in real life oh my god it's so sad the instagram bios we talked about it last week oh don't even fucking get me started the girls that write wife of mother okay the mother of i'm gonna let slide okay i've never had kids right i'm sure maybe

once i have them i I'll like them. But you know what? I have to say, though, the only way I disagree is when they say mother of and then they tag their baby or they tag their dog because they have a dog. Yeah. Or a baby, a dog mom. But when you say wife of. Can I go off for a minute? Please.

Please. Wife of. We all know Alex has had her days of, can I go off for a minute? Please, please. Wife of. We all know Alex has had her days of, you know, dating professional athletes. Clean chaser. Here we go. Okay. So, and listen, I'm not trying to throw shade, but I get it. It's okay.

Fucking shade. Every time. Put your sunglasses on, sweetheart. We're not talking shit. We're like. Here we fucking go. I'm about to take a massive dump on these a lot a lot of professional athletes wives yeah will literally say in their instagram bio wife too and then they tag their husband who's the famous one and a lot of times the husband

doesn't even have the wife in his bio so she's like this is my husband or this is my boyfriend like i swear and it's like sweetie sweetie sweetie a part of you i also thinks is putting it in there so that like maybe people will not try to fuck your husband or your boyfriend it's just like a ring has never stopped absolutely if anything it's more attractive but i think that that in itself is so embarrassing because these girls, I'm like, can I ask you a question? Of course. Go for it.

When your boyfriend was playing. A sport. A sport. Yes. And you were sitting with all the wives. Yes. And you went up to them and you were like, hey, my name is Alex. Oh my God.

Would they put their hand down and be like, hey, I'm Jason Marazzi's wife. I need to stop coming up with these names jason marazzi guys he's a huge nba player go check him out no but is that what they do hey i'm so-and-so's wife sit back relax and enjoy this okay here we go i will never forget oh my god i was at beauty in essex um it's a place in new york guys go check it out they have good food and i was there with a group of people i'd been recently starting dating this guy so i was kind of new to the group you know okay and one of the wives i was awkwardly like kind of subjected to sitting next to her so i'm like all right i'm gonna introduce myself who the fuck put you in that situation i'm gonna beat them up fuck him that's why we're fucking exes okay don't ever

fucking put me next to a fucking hoe so so so so okay so i turned to her and i'm like hi i'm alex like nice to meet you and she looks at me and i guess we'll use the name jason since you're getting off on that name today sweetheart she goes hi i'm jason's wife no and and i'm sitting there i'm like okay so i said i'm alex no what the fuck is your name oh my god she's like hi i'm jason's wife and then i just looked at her and i was like do you have a name i literally i go so does your birth certificate say jason's wife she changed it legally so I looked at her and I was like oh right um and your and your name I just said that I was so awkward and she was like oh it's Kelly and I was like oh nice to meet you Kelly and she goes what do you do and at the time I was working at the magazine so I was

like oh like I work at this magazine like what do you do and she goes oh my try not to fall off your chair. She literally just goes, I'm a baseball wife. She's a baseball wife? And her name is Jason. Is she married to a baseball? I don't understand. She's a baseball wife. And her name is Jason's wife. Jason's wife?

Baseball wife. Woo! Her name is Jason's wife. Okay, so when she walks around with like a name tag, it says Jason's wife. baseball wife. Woo! Her name is Jason's wife. Okay, so when she walks around with like a name tag, it says Jason's wife, occupation baseball wife. Boom! Dude, it's sad. Can I ask you a question?

Of course. So what happens when they break up? What does she do? Jason's ex-wife. Jason's ex-wife, ex-baseball wife. And they're like, so now what? She's like, retired baseball wife. Things didn't work out so well.

Dude, that's what I'm saying. It's like, I understand that they're like so now what she's like retired baseball wife things didn't work out so well dude that's what i'm saying it's like i understand that they're listen everyone's like don't shit i get it there are some people that are gonna be proud that they're married let the photo speak for themselves post with your husband but he's not a part of your actual anatomy i'm surprised when you asked her like she was like was like, I'm Jason's wife. And then you were like, okay, what's your name? I'm sorry. She wasn't like, does it matter? Does it matter? Does it matter? Does it matter?

Just know Jason. Just know wife. And that's it. Big, small, wife, Jason, me, no name. That doesn't matter. Jason's the main one. Look at my bio. I've got him in there.

That's literally. Dude. It's sad. It is sad because you need to have your own fucking identity you do and listen like we said i get that if you're proud or you just got married or some shit i don't fucking know but you do not need to have your significant other in your fucking bio if you're going to if i like click on his name because you tagged him in your bio. And I go to his profile. And you are nowhere to be found. Sweetie.

Sweetie. Sweetie. Sweetie. I reevaluate. Reevaluate. Also, if your boyfriend is a professional athlete and goes and he has his thing on private. Oh. And because you've been asking him to post pictures with you.

Because this actually recently happened to a couple that I knew. And they just got back together. And the posting him again and all of a sudden he went private because i know she was like you need to post me and he's like okay i'll post you meanwhile private the witness protection program she's like okay sweetheart i'll post the program to protect him so he can still fuck girls he can pork them oh keep it accountable girls try to stay strong you don't need to actually have the name of your boyfriend as your name as you introduce yourself and you don't need to have it in your fucking bio obviously do whatever the fuck you want we're just here trying to give you advice of how not to look fucking stupid yeah that's it that's all we're

trying to do yeah trying to make the world better fucking place okay guys so we had a very interesting story that our friend recently told us um he's a public figure he's pretty famous and we were we want to tell you guys this story because we've actually i don't think we've ever talked about this kind of topic on call her dad yes so go ahead so if you so the story is he was traveling abroad and he hooked up with a broad oh oh oh oh oh okay i need to stop i'm sorry that was pretty clever though he was traveling and he hooked up with this girl yeah and he woke up in the middle of the night to a flash coming from her iphone camera meaning she was taking a fucking picture of him sleeping after they had sex yeah so he like freaked out he was like yo what the fuck are you doing and she tried

to play it off which like kind of props to her because i guess it's like in that moment what the fuck else do you do but she was like oh no i was trying to take a selfie and that sorry sorry sorry like first of all bitch what do you mean you're trying to take a fucking selfie in the middle of the fucking night like crouched over him i would have been like i'm using my flashlight to look for something i lost something i fucking lost i'm making sure the condom still like what the fuck bitch yes and so she tried to play it off and he was just like it was the weirdest fucking thing i like took her phone and i made her delete the picture and went and of course obviously guys might remember whenever you go and you ask someone to delete a picture and then you have to go into the deleted pictures okay do not forget to do that i think it's the

craziest thing because um people know may know who i'm talking about but that similar thing also happened to someone when i was in um boston university this professional athlete in Boston had just won the Super Bowl um it's a pretty famous story and he slept with this girl and she in the middle of the night when he fell asleep she took a selfie with him in it her awake smiling him behind her sleeping oh my god tweeted that's like so creepy that's so creepy right and she tweeted the picture. That's like so creepy. That's so creepy, right? And she tweeted the picture and the craziest thing was like. Oh, she tweeted it. She fucking tweeted it. Okay.

I did not know that. Yeah. So this story, you take it to the next level where she put it on social media. And what ended up happening is Boston is like such a strong sports city. And all these people rallied behind this guy and they were like yo that's so fucked up and what ended up happening is this girl literally was banned from every single bar in the city almost every restaurant like this girl literally couldn't get in anywhere totally black completely so when she thought it was like oh my god i'm fucking like this really famous athlete she

fucked up she posted it and now her she had to like move her life was like holy shit yeah so it's like it's crazy that i feel like that's kind of fucking okay so what are these girls trying to get what kind of clout are they're trying to say i let this guy famous guy put his wiener penis inside of my vagina pickerty-pockerty humble brag front door brag right right why are you bragging and then every other girl on the internet is like oh yeah i fucked him last week too but i didn't take the picture the girl took a picture it was a selfie with him in the background yeah what face is she making is she smiling is she doing a duck face is she holding up the peace sign wait i like literally you know look it up right now i don't think there's any face you can make that doesn't make you look like a fucking creep oh my god look at this she's half of her face is in it and she looks like she's

investigating also he is fucking dead he literally he's kind of like is he dead or is he like alive kind of vibe like did this just kill him she looks creepy as shit right she should have at least had her whole face right or like put her tits in it or some shit that is an not a good look that's embarrassing oh my god and and she put a fucking caption on it just fucked bleep no lie no no lie guys look he's in my bed it's actually really really funny oh now that i'm seeing it it's kind of fucked up but like really kind of fucking also amazing okay it's hard it's hard because it's like she's kind of like my conquest like trophy throw it up like here we go look at this bitch who i took down last night oh he also took down a super bowl i

just took down his dick and it's like oh bitch but then at the same time it's also like but you kind of look fucking creepy okay girls we're sitting here saying we're so creepy for doing this guys don't necessarily take pictures of girls while they're sleeping maybe they do they'll fucking take pictures of them when they're sucking their dick oh my god or when they're having sex without the girl knowing you just gave me a post-dick appointment flashback i'm gonna start crying can i tell this story dick appointment flash no it's not a good one it's not a good one somber sophia we're sad look at me i have tears in my eyes tell me fucking have some respect a little twinkle not a good one a loner tear okay tell me so this is what happened okay secure your seat belt oh my god get your popcorn and your tissues for me oh wow okay okay so i was um

talking to this guy it was like a few that was terrifying does anyone hear that guys did you hear that did you guys just hear that thunder oh that was thunder oh my god okay jesus christ sorry guys we're getting off track okay so so i was talking to this guy um this was about two years ago and we were getting pretty serious he came to new york to visit me we were in the hotel room. We were hooking up. We had been drunk. And I was giving him that Cooper special. Like only the men I love deserve. You know, I don't give it to everyone. But if you're lucky and he was lucky.

So I am going down on him. I'm giving him like great head, sloppy head. And I think I was so fucked up. Usually I make eye contact when I'm giving guy head. But I just. You were too drunk. I was so fucked up. I had eye contact when I'm giving guy head but I just you're too drunk I was so fucked up I had to focus on one thing at a time it's like the dick or if I look up I'm throwing up yes so I was focused on the dick and then he finishes and he's laying there and we had ordered food so he was falling asleep and he was like babe I'm gonna fall asleep so he

gave me his phone and he was like I knew he wasn't talking to other girls like I could go through his text messages there were none so he was so open about his phone and he was like, I knew he wasn't talking to other girls. Like I could go through his text messages. There were none. So he was so open about his phone. But you peed. Of course. Because. Because I'm a fucking daddy.

For fun. I was bored. What was I going to do? So he's falling asleep. I have his phone. I'm waiting for the Uber Eats to call and I'm bored. I start scrolling. Yep.

And then I decide to go into the camera roll. Oh, sweetie, sweetie, Alex. He has not only a nude of you. It is a full blown video of me literally 30 minutes ago sucking his dick. Yeah. Oh, and I was so fucking pissed off because listen, I'm always down for a good fucking little like tape. You know what I'm saying?

Give it what he wants. You guys can watch it when you're not together. It's hot. But the fact that I was so close to this guy and he didn't he did not tell which I also I have to say I was also really upset with myself that I can't get over the fact that I didn't look up once okay okay you don't need to be mad at yourself the blowjob eye contact was not where was the head game like who was I back then anyways so what happened is i being the psycho i am walked into the fucking room fucking flung the phone right at his fucking head it hit

above on the headboard he woke up i'm like what the fuck is wrong with you i freaked out at him and he ended up actually crying this this is taking as he should i'm like you're fucking disgusting like what the fuck like why didn't you tell me and he chalked it up to which i like kind of understood he was like i never get to see you we're long distance i'm so sorry i'm fucked up and i just wanted it for later like i love you blah blah blah and i was like well i don't fucking love you he needed to tell me he needed to tell you so you could have given him the fucking eye contact and backed it up and said some dirty shit i would have been sloppier yeah i would and said some dirty shit. I would have been sloppier. Yes.

I would have done some nastier shit. You would have been on your A-game. Oh, my God. Okay. So anyways, so I deleted the video and it was just like a weird moment for me. But I think in that moment, aside from us always being savages, I think like I just wanted to say to the Call Her Daddy girls, like that was a pretty violating experience because I was just so caught off guard.

And I just can't explain opening a phone and seeing basically a sex video of me like a verbal agreement between the two of you being like yes yes because it really fucked me when i looked at that i'm like what the fuck like this was just gonna be out there though what if it's fucking iCloud right hacked yeah then i'm on porn hub i wonder how much i'll get paid for that oh my god okay you know what the fucked up thing is that i do okay i have to record them i yes i know i have like the the regret that sets in after it's like the post sex tape regret there's the post dick appointment flashback there's the post sex tape regret tell me you've never had this wait i am so i can't but first of all what god bless your soul

for calling it that i fucking love that second of all i cannot believe we've never fucking talked about it pstr dude you are hooking up with a guy and he's like this is so hot i want to film this and you're like and you guys are in the middle of it shit is so hot it's so you want to keep it going it ramps it up a notch it makes it hotter yep you look at him and you're like yeah yeah let's film this film away yes fucking let's go you film the whole thing goddamn gopro on my head you act like a crazy crazy porn star but not too much but enough it looks authentic authentic a little classy with a little sassy a little okay a little edgy so you let him film it i feel like we take the same sex i know why don't we have exactly what we're doing we're both okay and then it's over you guys both have your orgasm whatever

and he's like babe that was so hot and you're like hand the phone over hand the fucking phone over do you know what i'm talking about and you're like delete that right now and he's like what he's like what that was the best day of my life and you're like hand the fucking phone delete it now and he's like i don't understand he's like i haven't even gotten to watch it yet what he's like i literally haven't even enjoyed it yet you're like give me the fucking phone before i it's like dr jekyll mr heidi's like where was this girl two minutes ago literally the thing with a post sex tape regret is when you're in the middle of having sex. Tell me more.

Outline it for me. You. Step by step. So this is like what I do. So I take off my panties. Okay. When you're having sex with this guy. Yeah.

You're not worried about if you look hot. No. A true daddy gang girl. No. You don't give a shit. No. You fucking throw it all in there. You're in there to feel

good yeah okay yeah so when you get a hold of the sex tape you made sometimes you look at that and you're like you are a fucking animal disgusting like you're like my hair is slicked back. I'm like twitching. Okay, no. Hold on. You should save your hair. Hold on. Hold on. This is not what I look like during. That's not what I meant.

But you get what I'm saying. Every guy just got a boner because you're just saying, we take our panties off. Okay. My hair is slicked. I'm like, my hair is matted to my face. I'm salivating. Foaming at the mouth. My Invisalign.

Yeah. Falling out of my mouth. Making grunting noise. People are like, are you, do you have rabies? Like, what's happening? No, but seriously. Sometimes you'll look at the sex tape and be like, God, I look hot. Or sometimes you're like, no.

Dude, I have had positions sometimes that I look back and I am girlfriend. That is for you and your eyes to see only. You don't even want the guy to have it. I know he was in the moment with me in it. But if he watches the video from a different angle, he's going to see the fucking pooch. And it's not going to look as hot as when he was in the moment with me in it but if he watches the video from a different angle he's gonna see the fucking pooch and it's not gonna look as hot as when he was fucking me from behind i let the belly hang when i was getting fucked from mine so now that he's watching this video i'm like oh my god he sees the truth yeah i let it hang you're like no no no let him just use his memory yeah yeah i don't need him having it oh my god i'm sweating i don't need him having access to something that he can pause rewind screenshot like you know what i mean

oh i fucking feel that's the other part of it oh my god i'm like shaking right now thinking about the videos of me out there oh my god same fuck me Same. Fuck me. Questions of Zevik. Questions of Zevik. I said that so wrong. Questions of the week. Questions of the week. Here we fucking go. Let's get into it.

Okay, this is a really interesting little hack that this girl wrote in. And I think it's like kind of psycho genius. genius okay that her boyfriend is doing to cheat on her we have a real genius we've got a real genius listen up folks okay so this girl goes oh my god dude i just caught my boyfriend taking screen recordings of other girls nudes except he started screen recording on a different post so it looked like a video i would never care to watch it was like a video game or a sports game and then he scrolls or goes to either a picture or a video of these bitches my relationship is over but you're welcome for the tip so basically i love it isn't that amazing so basically guys and girls if you're trying to save nudes but you're scared people

are gonna find them don't save them as pictures yeah and then that's such a good point you have like all these like nfl highlight reels you're not gonna fucking click on that in your boyfriend's phone and because we always play both sides fucking check every single video this person has every single video every photo album even check their fucking family's phones their friends phones it's got to be somewhere no video is no video is safe oh daddy gang member rodan should i delete my instagram photos of my recent ex she broke up with me so i don't want to seem butthurt by doing it but on the other hand i also don't want new girls i meet to be weirded out by all the photos i have of her and us. Okay.

Well, first of all, if they. She broke up with you, bitch. You don't come off as butthurt. You got your ass dumped. Get rid of her and move on and get another bitch. I always think. I mean, listen, you can do whatever you want. But I personally think if you're trying to get new pussy, if you're trying to get a new dick, get the fuck rid of your ex.

They're your ex for a fucking reason. gotta weigh out the pros and cons what are the pros of having it up there so that this so that you don't seem butthurt no fuck that archive that shit screenshot that shit and save it for like if you're like on a rainy day you want to cry your eyes out and look at your pictures have them in your camera roll but no one wants to fuck someone that's still hung up over their ex no i actually fun fact went on a date this past weekend that was for another day for a story it was oh but um anyway so we actually were um on the date and I was like talking about how it was annoying that I couldn't stalk him before the date because his profile's on private and he was like oh well you can look at my profile

and he was showing me his Instagram and we scrolled down far enough and he had multiple pictures with his ex. Oh my God. And I just looked at him and I was like, I can't believe you still have pictures with your ex. Like, dude, it's going to be hard for you to pick up girls once they follow you. And he was like, wait, what? And I told him all about, I was like, you got to get rid of it.

And he actually ended up deleting all of them in front of me. I was like, wait, no, you can archive them. He deleted all of them. And now I've ghosted him and i haven't talked to him since so this poor guy just got rid of all of his pictures with his ex honestly though community service there you go charity charity you're helping him yeah it bust of a date but at least i helped him with his fucking profile yeah can i and then you ghosted him poor guy poor guy r.i.p r.i.p can i also add that if you do not delete the pictures the new girl you start dating is going to find them is going to stalk whoever it is yeah and i think that nine times out of ten that's not a good thing no because then she's gonna start comparing herself to her

like keep it a fucking secret absolutely if you can okay just quickly i just want to throw this in there because i'm always we always want to help people out with their dating profiles we had a daddy write in and just be like hey guys just wanted to update the daddy gang um i've had call her daddy in my bio for a while and i just recently added free hashtag free sofia so a lot of girls that don't know what call her daddy is but they see free sophia they'll message me first and they'll be and they'll be like either what is that or if they are really daddy gang they'll know exactly what that means i think that's really fucking hi i'm loving this yes i think it's so fucking smart guys just like you don't know what to dm them or like message them

it's like there you go put something in your fucking bio that's worth them messaging you yeah because i would totally be like what the hell yeah i would slide into a guy's first if i saw something like that i love that it said free sofia if you guys want to really help me out do hashtag expunge sofia's record oh so it gets off the internet you're like also please any lawyers that listen could you please get me up i'm dead serious like i'm up so that i can get it taken off my record but i need to get it expunged so i'm so i'm so sorry sweetie please help me i threw up on a guy's dick that i'm really into what do i do now that'll do it that'll do it becky extra lube sweetheart sweetheart that's you just swallow that shit up i it up oatmeal oh alex clam chowder okay i guess i'm not gonna be eating for the next two hours no no girlfriend listen

listen listen if it okay if it was just a little bit in her mouth no big deal and he doesn't even know no you just swallow you slurp it back up really swallow it back down like it was your breakfast absolutely if it was an explosion projectile vomit all over like it made it what his it way it wet can i whoa something's in the air oh my god i was going to say i was going to say if it made its way all the way up to his belly button like that's how bad it is like it's stuck in the crevice throw up barometer that's that's when you know yeah um i this is what i think if i was sucking a guy's dick and i threw up all over it i would immediately be be like, oh my God, don't move. I would run to the bathroom.

I would get a wet towel and a dry towel and I would come back and I would like clean him the fuck up. And then be like, let's keep going. And then I would be like, I'm so fucking sorry. I was trying so hard to deep throw you. Like your cock is so big. Boom. Oh my God.

Boom. And then I'm like, let me try again, babe. I can't throw up twice. I'll go for it round two. And he's like, Jesus Christ, this girl's a fucking savage. I want her to suck on my fucking cock no matter what comes out of her goddamn fucking mouth let's go oh oh great answer Alex I knew you were gonna I was gonna add but I think you took care of it I can tell okay okay next Daddy Gang wrote in Sophia would it be lame to caption one of my vacation pics with my outlook away message?

Is that to try hard? Oh, so like they were going to put like out of office? Yeah, like something like that. I think that's okay. I think that's, I think anytime you're being funny, it's fine. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Although I will say when someone is being funny in every fucking caption, sometimes it's overboard. I agree.

But I actually was just thinking about this the other day because we were helping a daddy gang member for everyone on instagram that is like struggling really hard with trying to figure out like when to post their thirst drops or even just when to post like that hot picture that you've been sitting on because i know a lot of times especially if you don't have as big of a following and it's just like your friends some girls get super insecure to like post a hot pic because they're like, my friends are going to judge me. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I want to give the daddy gang the excuse for every time you have a fucking hot ass

picture, throw it up on Wednesday and tag Sophia and I and write some caption about like Wednesdays. Yeah. Yeah. Call her daddy Wednesdays or whatever. Blame us and like fucking say something about you know what I mean dude even I sometimes when I'm about to post a thirst trap I'm like yeah I don't know and then I'm like call her daddy I don't know the default or use a fucking quote that's such a boom daddy gang okay guys is that it I think

that's it we love you so much I think we had a lot of fun this week. We did. Oh, God. We love you guys so much. We love you guys. If you guys could leave us a rating and a review on iTunes, we can't tell you how much that helps us. And like Sophia and I say, we know it's our theory. I don't know if it works. But if you press unsubscribe and then subscribe again to the podcast. You guys, I do it like multiple times a day.

Me too. I'm like peeing and I'm like unsubscribing and resubscribing. It helps so much. Thank you. All right, guys. Every Wednesday, baby, we will be back next week. See you guys. Bye.

Bye.