Call Her Daddy - 66- Why We Can't Cum

Episode Date: December 18, 2019

This week's episode kicks off with a mental breakdown from Alex who went snooping at a guys house and saw something she shouldn't have. Risky business! Also, the girls discuss why they (and women everywhere) can't cum during sex and a revolutionary way to take an a** pic. Ladies, this will be the only nude you will want to take from now on, GUARANTEED. Plus, the girls debate if it's ever okay to send a dirty video.…that includes you having sex with someone else. Hot? Or not? 

do you call him daddy do i call her daddy call her daddy what's up assholes it is alex and sophia back at it again for another episode of call her daddy my life is in fucking shambles wow wow wow guys this is not a joke alex is like kind of freaking the fuck out i'm like tweaking out over here we just sat down in the studio we had a complete different intro planned and we're in the car ride i can't stop bitching about something and sophia's like why don't you just fucking talk about in the intro so i'm about to tell you what's happening yes please put the blame on me per usual so it feels like for the show.

Alex would not shut the fuck up about this. And I'm like, why don't you just air it out, honey? Let it out, honey. And I'm like, you're using me, but it's fine. Okay. Something happened to our friend Alex, guys. So I'm hooking up with an ex. I mean, that right there.

That's already an issue. That's already like oof. And it started, you know, we started saying we're just going to fuck. We're just going to be. Oh. As it always is. I know. I could have told you.

No one's shocked. No. So we started out. We're like, let's just fuck. Let's just have fun. Fuck and fuck freely. And of course, when there's history, the emotions,

it just starts to pile up and it can't be simple. At least for one person. I agree. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sometimes for one. So his big fat head won't shut up about like,

you know, the past is the past, the future is ours. Like, let's grasp it and run together. And I'm like, sounds all great. However,

I was laying in his bed the other day and I was just feeling adventurous I was feeling curious and he was not home he had just left and he left me in his bed what an idiot and I'm interested to start peeking around I love how you call it adventurous and curious. That's literally a violation of privacy. I'm like, I start looking through his home. Just fit. I start snooping, which is actually very frowned upon. It is.

So I start snooping. Classic. I start snooping through this man's room and there's really nothing in the room other than two nightstands on each side of the bed. He's asking for it. He's asking for it. He sleeps on on each side of the bed. He's asking for it. He's asking for it. He sleeps on the left side of the bed, so I fucking lunge for the left nightstand like it's my goddamn job.

And I sit there, and I open it up, and it's just like a little box of goodies. You got the condom in a box to the left. No. Oh! Okay, stop. I'm so sorry. So, obviously, we've got our classic condoms that he's never even tried to use on me so i'm like what are those for there's always a condom yeah and you're like

why aren't those used on me right even like when you've been dating a guy seriously for a year like there's condoms in there and you're like okay right but that's not what i found there is a black book naturally i'm like what's in the book his journal his financial goals what's in there so i open the book and his initials are on the front and when i open it i see a nice slideshow portfolio that this girl made for him and it's a full-blown lingerie shoot it is a full I think there's like 10 pages each side has like huge ass pictures of her doing a full-blown lingerie shirt huge ass tits huge ass no focus yes oh yeah they're gonna say who said something sophia stop saying the focus is of her body yes okay so i'm swiping through i'm looking through all of it and at the end of the book it's like love you like all this shit and i'm reading it and i am like hold on first of all is this man

a fucking idiot that this is sitting in his nightstand why the fuck did he leave this here and me here that is time that is kind of extremely dumb it literally is it right that you did that i'm not gonna comment on that you know it's your thing his own but just like for a psa there's men listening women are going through your stuff specifically your fucking nightstand especially if you don't hide your shit exactly i think that just exemplifies like just men in general are so fucking stupid right so that's the first step second step is obviously i'm like hold on yeah i need proof that this is here because this could be gone tomorrow did you like run to fedex and make copies of it no no I just quickly took out my phone no big deal and I just took a picture of every single one of the

photos so it's on my phone right now I have front to back cover every single picture of this girl sorry girl but like I need it for proof yes so I come home to Sophia and I'm like look at this photo shoot where I'm freaking out over it. Not even freaking out like insecure, just more so like this is so fun. Oh, it hurts. That's the thing. It hurts so good. When you find something on a man. When you stalk or snoop and you find something,

it like hurts. But it feels amazing. It's so fucked up and so good. Satisfactory. Yes. That's a great word. So naturally women women anyone listening is like oh wow like alex is upset no i'm upset in the best way because because this is a perfect

opportunity for me to hold on to this information and if we get in a fight if i do something wrong if you bring something up have this in your back pocket just waiting waiting because it's literally like he could say anything whenever he like he'd be like you have just been treating me like shit and like what are you doing you say nightstand photo shoot lingerie in love love you cheers oh and it said love you love you so pretty much they were like married married so if he has any issues of anything i've been doing it's like you're married oh yeah yeah so this book is a perfect outlet for me to keep in my back pocket ammunition 101 and that's just a little tip of the day from caller daddy Daddy. Most girls would run and be like, you're disgusting.

Like you say, like you're in love with me. To be completely honest, I think most girls would be like, oh, since this is an ex and we were broken up, like he kind of is like a load. I'm like, what? I can't relate. No, anything that you can take, you make into something of the present. I don't care if you've been broken up for 10 years. Anything that happened in that span can can be brought up the plan is now okay let's break it down the plan is is this is beautiful i have all the pictures on my phone of this girl poor girl and um i'm ready to use this at any moment the issue is sophia and i always talk about things

in a timely manner on this podcast, but usually something like this, I would talk to him before I would try. I would try to use this ammo. And if I use it, then I would talk about it on the podcast, but I'm really fucking exposing myself. And hopefully he doesn't listen to this podcast because I'm literally outing myself.

The thing is guys, and this is where it gets really interesting. Here we go. Is this guy that Alex is dating again says he doesn't listen. Yep. Yep. So now if he brings this up. Yep.

He's exposing himself. He is. So he's going to have to keep his mouth shut. It's going to be so beautiful. I'm so excited to see what happens. It's like an experiment. Because it's either I get to use it on him or he's going to expose himself that he listens to the podcast. And just stay tuned, folks.

We have an anal update. Gotta love that asshole. That asshole. That asshole. Asshole. Asshole. A-S-S-M-R. Asshole.

Asshole. Asshole. Asshole. Okay, guys. So last week we did pretty revolutionary. Sophia brought us an asshole and an anal tip which really I think changed the game for anal basically Sophia quickly explained like what they do you bear down a doctor wrote in a doctor a doctor okay or student doctor he said you do this

thing called bear down it's what they tell their patients to do when they need to stick something up the asshole. And you basically push. And you push as if you're pushing out a piece of... A pulley. Yes.

A pulley. So we had someone write in and the daddy gang works so fast. We released the episode and hours later... Hours later, we had a girl write in

being like, I just tried it. I'm like, wow. I'm like, wow. Whoa. So she wrote in and she was like, I took the medical students advice on how to do anal. And it was the most painless method ever. I withheld it from my husband for almost two years now. And he is stoked.

We tried it. It was amazing. Saving marriages everywhere. Girls, he's going to get me daddy merch for Christmas. Woohoo. Anal for daddy merch okay oh wow i fucking love this bitch yeah anal saved her marriage that's amazing that's what you know guys tell your fucking couples therapist call her daddy so i just thought that was really dope um we just wanted to point that out if you guys are trying anal and you missed last week's episode which you should never that's a sin that's like an actual

cardinal sin to miss an episode um but that's the new anal tip for the day here we go okay let's get into it into it why women don't come from sex that's a that was that was a loaded statement not one woman ever has ever come in her entire life okay that's it that's to call her daddy and that's it for today um no let me rephrase why women have a hard time having an orgasm during sex oh baby that's fucking fair to say it is so fair it is so fucking fair let me break it down break it because the male mind the male versus female mind the male mind is like oh my god this feels so good how do i not come wait when is the last time you did that voice wait that voice you did so long ago and i miss it and then the female mind when she is about to be fucked or she's fucking is like yesterday jason told me that his ex

girlfriend rebecca was a scorpio meaning that she's amazing in bed because scorpios are great in bed so she was way better than me so i'm not even going to compare but i could like throw it out and i could, like, try. But she also has really big tits, and my tits aren't really that big right now, because it's not my time of the month, and I know that my tits get bigger on my time of the month, but it's not my time of the month, so what am I supposed to do, because my tits don't look big, and what am I going to do, and do I contour, with a little bit of, like, contour, and, like, I'm like, I don't know what to do, but, like, I know he's staring

at my tits, so do I hit him with an ass shot? Also, he told me that she's a squirter, and I'm like, am I laying in her squirt right now? Like, did they hook up in the set? Because I don't know how to squirt do i smell okay does my vagina look okay am i okay that is what's going through a girl's head when we're going to have sex there's so many fucking things going through your head when you're going to have sex and a man is just like no masterpiece hit him in the back piece i don't know and men all they think about is oh i i can't

come hold on for dear life don't come and every woman's like i hope to god maybe i'll come this time right maybe that made no sense probably not to anyone but what we're saying is like when girls are having sex like there is so much going on yes like that's literally the thought process that a lot of women have it's true it's like we have so much going on in our minds in order for us to come we need to be fully focused vacuum seal on coming so any other distraction is not going to allow us to come but then we don't want to be too focused on coming because then there's pressure and then we won't come and then we won't come so it's got to be a nice salad. It's just like. It's so true.

I mean, if you just think about it, men and women, men have three thoughts a day. Sex, food, poop. Poop. I was going to say sports. Oh. But then like. Poop and sports. Yes.

Beer, sports, poop. Beer. Sex. Poop. I, the other day, was having sex. And I'm going to be very open with the daddy gang here. I was actually talking to Sophia about this the other day. I was having great sex with this guy and I didn't have I didn't come. I didn't have an orgasm which was totally fine because the sex was super good. Can I just cut you off and applaud you for even saying that? Oh. Because so many girls lie about this thing.

I have been at dinners where the girls are like, I come every single time I have sex. Every single time. It's like, no you don't. And I'm like, maybe there's a few people, but like all five of you, no you don't. No you don't. No you don't. Not every single girl at this table comes. No. They're all yeah me too totally right every single time it's the best sex ever i come every single time i'm a slut i love it i love it i'm coming right now in fact and it's

like no you don't no you don't and that's the thing it's like so either you may come but you don't come every time and if you do quote unquote come every time you're probably faking it at least a couple times i i agree there's probably gonna be some girls on here they're like no i do come every single time let's just clarify there are some women that can it's very few far between and there's a lot of women that don't fake it but there are a lot of women that yes so the reason we want to bring this up is because Sophia and I, when I brought this up to her, we started to talk about, well, why didn't I come that night? And I'm not going to lie. I would never lie to the daddy gang. The guy that I'm hooking up with is.

Here's his name. No, Sophia's face is like, no, the guy that I'm hooking up with gets a lot of women. But I know having sex with this guy, he has seven STDs. But I know goddamn well that I'm contracting chlamydia as we speak. And that in itself makes it hard to come. And I know that that'll make it hard. But I'm already in it, so I might as well. Fuck you.

No. The reason I did not come, I was comparing myself to the hundreds of girls that he has fucked, some fucking Victoria's Secret models. And so I was not focusing on coming. I was focusing on impressing him. You were fucking to impress him. Not to come. And the thing is, people are, I already know people are listening.

They're like, that is so not call her daddy. Like you girls should be going in there and like getting your orgasm and like, you know, moving on. We've even said that sometimes. And sometimes we do do that. Sometimes we do. But like depending on the situation, sometimes we are using the sex as a manipulation tactic to get what we want. You know what I mean? That feels right.

We're using him and using the sex to get what we want in the long run. We always say it. Throw the pussy at him. Yes. I know it sounds crazy. The voodoo clam. The voodoo clam. we're using him and using the sex to get what we want in the long run we always say it throw the pussy at him yeah i know it sounds crazy and i do clam the voodoo clam i know it sounds crazy but i am fucking him he's not fucking me i am fucking him okay i am fucking him and it's it's all part of the plan yeah i do the exact same fucking thing when i first start hooking up with a guy i have to ensure i see like devil in your eyes i have to ensure that when i leave his house the next morning i have to make sure this guy is calling his friends the next day being like i think i was like just assaulted but like in the best way oh yeah like i need this i literally want

to leave his apartment. I want him to get open up his laptop, get online and be like ring shopping and be like, I don't even know what just fucking happened. Like literally like voodoo clam. Voodoo clam. I'm under a voodoo spell that I cannot escape. Dude. And it's fucked up.

I'm looking at you and I'm nodding my head. Yes. Yes. Absolutely. Of course. And then I'm like, does anyone understand what the fuck we're saying? We are so unwell in the head.

Sophia, I think you need to give them an example. Me? Why? Because I've already exposed myself enough today. You need to give them an example of what, what do you mean? What are you doing to ensure you're making them obsessed?

Like you're focused on making them obsessed and not focusing on coming here you go i understand come on come on you really want me to like go there and go there like i start out by calling him daddy and like i end by like calling him like my dad oh okay yeah yes oh like hair and pigtails like saying like mommy's gonna walk in this has to be our little secret like this isn't fair like you're stretching my little pussy out like a little all of a sudden it's like a little daddy daughter and you're like whoa he's in oh i'm kidding but not but not but not but, I'm a woman of many talents. Of course. And I can't be giving an Oscar level performance and also coming.

Right. Like when you're full blown committed to daddy daughter, you can't also be like, I'm five years old right now, but also come. Yeah. If I did that stuff. Of course. Of course. It's kind of similar whenever I think about it.

When I'm getting fucked and I'm like really committing to the porn star thing and i'm like oh my god like come in me like fill me up with your cum and you're really committed to the language fill me up with your cum i have been there when you're so desperate for like the best sex ever trophy that you're like just fucking fill me up and you know goddamn well that it is like sketchy territory. And like, you should not be doing that. And then he fills you up and you're laying there. And it's like instant regret. But you got the trophy.

You got the trophy. And it's just going to cost you 40 bucks. Plan B. There we go. That's true, Sophia. So as you guys can hear, we're committing to a type of sex. And we're really trying to rock their world and we're not focusing on our own vagina.

Yes. And I know, again, it doesn't sound call her daddy because it's like, wait, you're supposed to get off. But that's the whole point. Yes. We're using sex as a manipulation tactic. And then once we manipulate the men. Long term goals.

Long term goals. Five year plan. Ten year plan. If I don't have a ten year plan with with this guy then yes i'm gonna hop on the dig have an orgasm and go yes queen but sometimes but sometimes you actually think you like the guy and you want to lock him down and you want to manipulate you want to take over the brain and then later you can come over the brain take over the brain hijack his brain hijack the plane of his brain and then you're gonna manipulate and then once you've manipulated and you've got him

where you want him and he loves the voodoo clam that's that's when you're like all right i'm tired i don't feel like yeah you're like i actually just feel like laying on my back and have you out for two hours exactly so then you do that i and then he's like okay so like in the beginning you were down to like suck my cum out of my dick with like a straw gargle it spit it back up like a seal at fucking sea world slurp it back up slurpy style 7-eleven and now you're just like uh i guess can we actually like do doggy but like i'm laying on my tummy and like i just took nyquil and like my sleeping it's a beautiful it's a beautiful combination but But yes, I also do want to just address quickly that when we say we're going in here and we're acting crazy and like being manipulative and focusing on making them be obsessed with our

sex. Also, it's all to a degree. Like, I don't want people to think we're going in there and we're doing headstands and swinging from the ceilings night one. We're not being like try hard. Thank you. It's a very specific process of manipulating via sex that we're doing yes so you're going to be a freak yes but you're going to be believable yes he's going because

okay for example loud does not equal hotter no you just screaming bloody murder right does not make the sex hotter like you need to be crazy but he needs to genuinely believe that it is something you are enjoying or it's not gonna work and i agree and i think i'm listening to us and we could go on about how great all this is but like the point of this is while we're being psycho manipulative call her daddy psychopaths we're so focused on this and that's why we're not coming and i'm realizing as i'm saying this that we really could have given a more simple reason as to a reason why a girl doesn't come there are hundreds of reasons why girls have a hard time coming during sex and we

maybe picked like the most least relatable least the least relatable like we could have been like you may be feeling a little insecure about your body we're like manipulate the mind get in there you can't focus on coming when you're trying to do daddy daughter and you're on his dick and it's a lot so if you so if you guys are still with us at this point yes if you're still with us guys there's so many fucking reason women don't come you may be insecure about your body at the time you may have just had your period and you're feeling bloated you may just be like stressed out and you just like can't get yourself there. You may realize halfway through you don't really like the guy. You may be thinking about your ex and then you can't come. Like there's all these reasons. But today I'm hoping maybe one or two people could really

connect the dots with the manipulation reason as to why we're not coming. I will say here's some health. All right. I'm going to throw some some health your way i'm ready for some fruit i will say i think with age things start to change yes just your overall comfortability with sex so as women get older they kind of stop faking it but they also have an easier time coming you just like understand your body better and understand what you want okay thanks for coming to call her daddy today i have no idea what we were just talking about, but moving on. Moving on. So at our company,

we have to share studio space. Yes. You guys see like, you get the episode each week, but it's interesting because you guys obviously don't see the behind the scenes of us actually coming to an office and sitting.

I mean, there are some people in the office that like have their own. Yeah. So some people in the office have their own studios. But like we share with like Yes Quite a few other podcasts

Yes We're bottom of the Yeah great Yes Totally fine I'm like we're bottom of the barrel Bottom of the food chain Yes

Totally fine Lions, tigers, amoebas And then us Us That is not the fucking food chain But you get the idea Absolutely So

Part of the reason Is because Other podcasts have guests And if you guys haven't noticed It's just Alex and I. Every week. Every week. We know you want guests.

Two amigos. We're forcing it down your throat. It's like, it's just the two of us. We'll have guests eventually. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They'll come. Hopefully. I don't think anyone wanted to come on here.

They're like, you're literally going to ruin my life and my career. But since it's just the two of us, we kind of get the last pick of studio time. Oh, that's a good. Last kids in gym class. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yes. We get the last pick because people that have guests on their show have priority. They need to schedule times to have the guests come in to get the studio time.

And then they're kind of look at Sophia and I and they're like, you guys can be flexible. Right. And we don't want to be flexible. And we don't want to be flexible anymore. We don't want to be flexible. We want to be flexible in the bedroom, not in the fucking studio. And so this week we kind of had it. Had it.

Pretty much we told the guy that like puts the times together. We were like, oh, we have a guest this week. Yeah, we're like, we've got one. And he was like, you've never had a guest before and now you have one. We're like, oh, we have a guest. We're like, line it up. Get a third mic in there. We got a guest.

Go ahead, Tom. Hey, guys. It's me. Baby Alessi. Everyone's favorite baby.essi everyone's favorite baby i fucking hate us tom is gonna be like that was the guest everyone outside is waiting for the studio and we're like no we've got a really hard pressing guest it's baby alessi motherfuckers of course guys i thought that i was kind of a little tiny bit maybe talented not talented but like maybe kind of entertaining kind

of funny just on my own just like as Sophia Franklin and the amount of DMs I get that are like you're not funny and like where's baby Alessi it's literally like your alter ego now I will just go fuck myself wait I'm realizing also like if you're new to this podcast you have no

idea what we're talking about people are like Sophia is a baby and she pretends to be and we just myself i'm realizing also like if you're new to this podcast you have no idea oh my god oh my people are like sofia is a baby and she pretends and we just talked about daddy okay we're fine there is a bachelor couple and they are completely exploiting their baby and they set up an instagram page for their child that's like not even one year old they're the worst couple in bachelor nation yeah and they like write captions pretending to be the baby and lauren um loyandick and then ari loyan is his name lauren dick i don't know and then it's baby alessi yeah and sophia is here with baby alessi yes i am the baby so i'm just gonna read a few captions and we're gonna cruise through this i'm gonna end up being like gypsy rose and kill my mom

for doing this to me no one would be upset no one would blame you watch that's gonna happen oh fuck all right baby leslie we need an update how's your life like what's popping how have you been guys it's everybody's favorite slut okay we're gonna. We're going to get in trouble. Seriously. No, I like it. Keep going. Happy Halloween, friends. In some big news, my auntie and uncle Donnie got married this weekend, and I heard they

might be working on a cousin for me. If you know what I mean. Wait, wait. I made up. Stop it. I made up. If you know what I mean. No.

You know what I'm not making up? So many firsts this week. I guess I have to start with seeing Santa. He is such a nice guy. That was a big moment for me. I gave him a cute smile. so hopefully I get some good gifts. I guess the biggest moment was that fact that I'm sitting up now. That fact.

That fact. The grammar in here isn't even correct. Oh, I thought that was you doing a little. No. No, Lauren. I mean, I don't think it's that big of a deal. But let me tell you, mom and dad's faces light up when I sit here and hang out. Who would have thought?

Okay, I like need to stop. Last sentence. Anyway, we are in L.A. for a little photo shoot. I'm doing with mom and dad. They decided to come watch. Here's a few pics dad took of me sitting up and practicing modeling for tomorrow's shoot. First of all, she's on a bed in L in the valley is she in the valley casting couch she's in a bed minimal clothing she's about to shoot a fucking porno

lauren and ari this is a psa guys it's a dp i'm getting paid ten thousand dollars extra mom said i didn't even have to do a swipe up for this one because it's going on a different site supposedly what the fuck dude this family i don't know i just feel bad every week i see her i kind of like go on my fake account she's like when will it stop it's actually so funny now that I randomly forgot this happened a little bit ago. I got a DM from someone from the daddy gang. They were in Paris and Ari and Lauren were in Paris with baby Alessi and the daddy gang took a picture. They spotted the whole family and they took a picture and they dm'd it to us and there was like they were like oh my fucking god spotted baby motherfucking alessi

and she's like strapped into her carriage there's like a whole like holding a fucking i like bang energy right like the baby energy i was gonna say baguette because they're in paris she's wearing a beret she has this scarf wrapped around her neck. She's holding a baguette. They like fucking set her up by the cathedral and they're like, say something in French. Oui, oui.

Alessi, hurry. Oui, oui, oui. Double, double, double. They're like, Alessi. Alessi, hurry. And then you see the dad like throwing her up in the air and he's like,

Lauren, get the shot. Right in front of the Eiffel Tower, baby Alessi's flying through the air. Alessi's like bawling her eyes out. I will say to this day, in every single picture, she looks like she is being held captive. I don't really want to comment much about the baby's looks. We're going to move on.

I've got to cut her off, but I just feel bad. Can you imagine? We're going to run into them one day can you we they probably have a restraining order on us and we don't even know and we're like yeah literally i'm like waiting for us to get a letter in the mail that's like this is no because you know she really defamation defamation of character of baby um you do know though that like as much as we do this like, we think it probably pisses them off, like, they do really enjoy it. You know that they're enjoying the publicity.

And sometimes it starts to pay me where I think about it. Because you know. Yeah. They're like, oh, my God, they talked about her again. And the followers are up. Oh, that we do that. Yes. Uh-huh.

They like the publicity. They're, like, jacking off. Can you guys also put Alessi's handle and, like, have people go follow her? Even, like, a little tag. Like, we could pay you for it. And, by the way, like have people go follow her? Even like a little tag. Like we could pay you for it. And by the way, if you're the people commenting, just get a life. We just wanted to update you guys. Yeah, we just need to like to get that off our chest.

Get it off our chest. It's been a while. Yeah, we're good. Are we good now? We're good. Okay, I'm sweating. This has to do with nudes. Noodle pics, nudies, nudies, nudies, nudies.

Someone wrote in something fascinating to me that i really wanted to share because we always want to help the daddy gang with like how they're twerking out their nude game like all the daddies want to know how to make that ass specifically look so fucking fire because i'm going to say it it is all about the ass yep the ass matters way more than the tits these days which is how it is which well i mean it always matters more than the tits these days. Which is how it is. Well, I mean, it always matters more than the face. The body is always more than the face. The body more than the face. I'm sorry, sweetheart.

It's easier to put a paper bag over your face than your body when they're fucking you. I thought you were going to say makeup. Yes, or paper bag. Either works. Okay, great. So she wrote in and she said, I have been slaving over ass pics for years, arching my back, trying to keep my balance to get that perfect angle but not anymore ladies take them while you're kneeling put one knee on the ground and

one foot like you're doing a lunge or just put both knees on the ground or on your bed and it's so much easier then to take that fire close up perfectly angled ass pick it's a breeze you can reach your arm around so it's so much easier to get that flattering up angle that perfectly frames your butt from below and when do you ever include your legs in a close-up no one will ever. No more sore lower backs from trying to get that perfect iPhone angle. Okay. Okay. Okay, bitch. Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay.

So, pretty fucking brilliant. Here we go. Usually when you're taking an ass shot, you're standing and you're like arching your back and you're like putting your bending your arm all the way behind your back so it can be under your ass and we've told the daddy gang because that is really such a perfect fire news when you put the camera under your ass cheeks essentially and angle it up towards the sky it's so hard to do it's so fucking hard Oh my god I have stood there For hours Yes And hours

And had to take breaks Had to charge my phone Get a snack Go back Try again Different lighting And you're The one side of your body

That you're leaning down And trying to get it on You are in pain There is an Instagram account That literally puts Photos Like serious photos Of Alex and I next to quotes that we've said in black and white and they're like so dramatized these pictures and there's this picture of me

in black and white like standing on a new york street and next to it they um quoted me and it says taking a nude is no joke it's a form of art it takes a village the tit shot is so easy the ass shot takes stability creativity stamina and concentration it is it takes a village and that absolutely relates to this fucking girl. It does. Stability, creativity. It's so creative. It is. You got to have stability. Yeah.

Stamina. The only thing that's missing is agility. Agility. Because that's what it also needs. Ooh, the agility. People would think we're like running a triathlon. No, we're literally just taking a picture of our assholes. Dude, that is so funny.

And I guess the only thing I can think of that would be like a little defect in this is like, make sure you're not kneeling on the ground and there's like a fucking trash can in the background. And he's like, why are you as tall as a trash can? Yeah, I'm trying to think of like the logistics of this. Yeah. Is there a way that you're going to seem like you're a twerp or a midget? You're a midget.

No, you're not. No, that's not politically correct anymore. No, no, no, that's not. I'm pretty sure it's a small person. Okay, a little person. But just make sure that you, I would almost do it like make sure there's just a blank background, like a wall. Yeah.

Or you're like a bad or something like your dresser is literally like 12 feet tall. Why is it towering over you? OK, and then I also want to point out that she because I was imagining just doing it when you're on both of your knees. But she's saying to have one knee up. So it's like you're like in a lunge all right i don't know that's interesting how do you feel about that i kind of think that could look really really hot i want to run home and try this yeah i could try it right now yeah you could actually you could die yeah actually why not right so sofia's on the ground right now she's trying oh I'm watching wait now lunge up bitch put your left leg up in a line oh oh but you would kind of get like a nice

vagina shot in and around that too that's Sophia does not know how to take a nude it's like i'm bending down to take a shit i'm literally gonna post this guys guys sophia just tried to quickly do it no no no me too i need a minute no and sure. And someone that isn't technologically challenged can absolutely get this one down easy. So I think this is pretty great. I think that throughout time, as humans have evolved, our bones have yet to bend with us in the way to allow us to get our perfect news. Right.

And so therefore we have aches and pains. We'll take a news, which men, i'm sure men don't have that i'm sure like future generations like they will be more like that one arm will be longer yes because it's like your right arm is for the ass yeah so a while back i talked about finding an ex cheating on me and one of the things i found was a sext between him and this girl and it was a video she sent him it was a video of herself sucking another man's dick and she sent it to the guy i was dating at the time savage savage but like hate but like disgusting but also like god damn it and she was like i wish like this was your cock like i'm gonna do this to you next time i see you blah blah blah blah so this sparked a very interesting conversation between sophia and

i at brunch the other day we were talking about sending a guy that you're hooking up with a video of you sucking another guy's dick or getting fucked by another guy because men want nudes yes and videos of a girl every day all day any fucking circumstance on his deathbed he wants a nude there's really nothing that would make a guy be like please don't send me a picture of your tits we remember we did have that one girl right in be like my boyfriend will not let me send him nudes we're like there's something wrong a guy that is not well in the head who knows he's not a man he grew up Amish like I don't even know but so it does bring up an interesting point because is that maybe the one thing that a guy would be like

wait i don't really want to receive a video of you getting fucked by another guy is it taking it too far and we want to talk about it because we've had some girls write in and we've obviously i've seen it in real time and i remember that one of my exes like his response was actually like not as positive as i thought it would be which made me happy but oh that's funny because my ex would have been like I think that my respect for you would go through the roof and I think that would really just be the best thing you could do for our relationship please go get fucked and send me a video God you live to tell the tale for a reason for a reason. Just kidding. That's fine.

Okay. So I asked a few guys and what they basically said is like, if I was hooking up with the girl and I did not have feelings with her whatsoever, I would be kind of down because maybe I'm horny and like it's hot at the time. But if I had any feelings for this girl, absolutely not. I would lose all respect for her right so i think if you have feelings for the girl it can get complicated unless you're dating a real kinky fuck absolutely yeah um i agree with you i think honestly it's like kind of a trade-off

it's like girls what do you want to get out of this with this guy? Because like the sex savagery level will go up, you know? Yes. But like his respect for you will go down. And like he won't have any. And it's fucked up. Like I don't make the rules. Right. But that's just like what it is.

No, it's true. And I think that is a really great point. I know a lot of times on this podcast we, you we talk about girls being fuck girls if you are in a situation ladies and you feel like this guy is getting way too in his fucking feels and he's just being like trying to tie you down and you just want to be friends with benefits send him a fucking video of you sucking another guy's dick or like getting fucked and be like like i want to do this next week with you blah blah blah that is a fucking extreme if i've ever heard one he's gonna be like oh and that's basically basically letting him know that like

i do have sex with other people and i'm happy to have sex with you next week but this week not so much yeah i'm getting fucked by someone else instead of just um letting him know and having open and honest conversation saying like i want to take a step back right right just send him a sex tape of you getting fucked. Absolutely. And a DP even better, even better. And rotisserie chicken.

Let him see all angles and really let him know that you, you take this seriously and you really want to let him visually understand where you're at in the relationship. Also, this guy, we always listen back and we're like, why didn't we laugh and let them know that we thought that was i'm a silent laugher we're like haha that was funny yeah get dp'd cool

anyways um but yeah no i think that's good um also this guy is probably going to assume that if you ever bring up like oh like let's record ourselves he's probably gonna be like let's not let's not because it's gonna be yeah it's gonna show up on porn hub yeah when you you send your shit around absolutely so just be careful but the thing is is like girls i would refrain from doing it unless you're just in it for the sex and you don't ever if you never want a future with this guy unless he's similar to sophia's ex-boyfriend um then don't send it because he's gonna lose all respect yeah it's like a little sociopathic it's a little like ooh like why what is what is she why is she doing that yes I totally agree sociopathic

it's a good way to put it this is very random but I was just thinking about it do you like when a guy sends you a video of himself like jacking off to fruition i do not even a pause you have to you're like i'm so glad you asked that i'm gonna ask for one right now i kind of do too i i almost i like that better than a dick pic groundbreaking isn't that kind of interesting i was just thinking about that because I had that in a visual of a guy that just sent me one of those. And I was like, I actually think I like that better. Me too.

Than a dick pic. Me too. And it's kind of hot because he's clearly videotaping it. And I mean, obviously, trust issues. He could be sending it to other people. But in my mind, he's sending it to me jacking off thinking about me right because he's videotaping but i mean but you could argue that like he's sending a dick pic he has a boner thinking about you absolutely absolutely but

there's something about him like jack i mean okay the flip side i'm sure a guy would rather does he want a picture of my pussy or a picture of me fingering my pussy that's true yeah that's true but guys but you know what no it's really smart you brought it up because a lot of girls do not enjoy dick pics right and maybe this is like what you should be doing instead like i know some girls have said like oh my god it was so scary like he sent me a video on snapchat of like his wiener and he was touching it but it's like unwarranted but like if i have had guys like send them talking to yeah in a texting conversation like an actual video from the iphone that he said and like he's coming on to his fucking stomach and like he's thinking about

me and i'm like babe like that's so cute like romance like look at our little kids on your tummy like yeah that's actually really interesting i'm glad i brought that up i think men if you are in a relationship or if you are like kind of hooking up and talking to a girl i would say this is a good way to show your love or show that you're thinking about the girl and it's like a little sprinkle of like that was really nice there's something hot when a guy comes yeah about it it's just like when a girl yeah that's good for the holidays merry christmas babe like i know we're not together on christmas but like i just jacked off in my home my home bed thinking about you i think if i received that as a christmas present i would fucking if that was my christmas present for my boyfriend i'd be like fuck off i wish i got the lighting

ready like everything mistletoe babe open up cream pie yeah um i don't know i think it's like a good little point videos are better than dick pics sometimes um hello this is questions of the week what who said that let me get it pop in here questions of the week questions of the week okay here we go someone said what's a british accent questions of the week questions of the week questions questions of the week question oh what questions okay anyways guys i think i'll be okay if you don't get done the british accent Questions of the week, guys. Let's get into it. Okay.

Okay. Here we go. Here we go. Hey, fathers. So I listen to every episode and many of the episodes twice. My question for you is about porn. My boyfriend and I watch porn together all the time. I'm totally okay with it and I'm totally fine with him watching it alone but before i broke up with him also must be your ex-boyfriend i found out he was watching it while

laying in bed next to me helping himself out while i was sleeping i want to know what you guys think of this like why did he just wake me up i'm right there. I want to know what the fathers think of this. Thanks, daddies. Hashtag die for that dick. Die for that dick, bitch. Yes, queen. Very, very, very good question. Very good question. Very interesting.

Very interesting. Because my first thought was, I think I would kind of be like, what the fuck? A, wake me up. Wake me up, bitch. But actually, what what am i talking about i'm like a bear hibernate if someone woke you up you'd be like shut the fuck up fuck off no but i agree if i'm laying next to you like if i'm there i would get kind of be like babe wake me up if you're that horny like what the fuck or you know go in the other room yes you know what i mean a little respect oh yeah like i don't know if i want to like wake up with cum i wasn't planning on like on right you know what i mean oh my god imagine if when he's going to finish he like finishes on her back or he like comes on her

face he's like facial and she has no idea once again this is not okay this is not okay facial and she like wakes up like nightmare you wake up with that above you okay disturbing really sure no but i don't know i don't really like that he's doing it next to her while she's asleep maybe if it was a one-off but if this is constantly happening also how about uh we just address the double standard because have i touched myself next to a guy in bed while he's sleeping? Absolutely. Absolutely. And it's not creepy when I do it.

I have gone to, I've watched him go to sleep. And we had sex. And I didn't really get mine. And you know what? I want mine. And I will lay there. And I will start masturbating. And do I feel shamed?

Maybe for.5 seconds. and then I go to town and I'm enjoying myself and honestly, it's nice with him being quiet for a minute and him just being to the left and I'm to the right doing my own thing. Also, I guess it kind of like ups the stakes a little bit. Like you're kind of like, ooh, like he could wake up at any moment.

It is kind of like. And it kind of like makes it like fun. It is kind of fun. I don't know anyone else touch themselves while their partners asleep. But for men, fuck off. Absolutely not. Gross, disgusting. Wake her up or go in the other room.

Yes. That's the knock it off. Knock it off. Knock it the fuck off. That's more of the story. All right. So I met this guy at a party and we drunkenly hung out one more time. And then he sent flowers to be delivered to my house.

Is that really sweet or really weird? I just can't tell if I'm too used to guys being assholes. Okay. This is so sad to me because this girl hung out with a guy twice and he sent her flowers. That should just be like, oh, that's really, really cute. Right. But because of our generation and the amount of fuck boys out there, girls are so not used to guys being sweet.

They're like, what's going on? Is he a fucking creepazoid? They're like, is he an actual serial killer? What's going on? Why are there flowers on my fucking... Why is he being nice to me? What's happening? What's wrong with him?

Dude, it is so sad. Is he an actual serial killer? What's going on? Why are there flowers on my fucking. Why is he being nice to me? What's happening? What's wrong with him? Dude. It is so sad. The thing is, is like, it's so sad because, and if I can tell guys anything, it's like, if you are seeing a girl and you just randomly send her flowers. She's gonna. We've both had it happen. And it's like just a little thing that like makes your day better. And it's so cute.

It's like, cause you know that they had your day better and it's so cute it's like because you know that they had to go online purchase them ship them to you like they're thinking about you they're making that extra step yeah i think it's kind of cute that he did that i think it's so cute and it's like gentlemen fuck boys have like ruined our generation they have but now girls think receiving flowers is creepy yeah they, they are like, oh, I'm used to him giving me plan B. Like, I don't know. I don't know how to receive flowers. All they ever give me is plan B.

I'm used to them giving me the cum rag. The cum rag. The cum rag is the flowers of our generation. What are you talking about? Why are the flowers in front of my face? And guys, it doesn't have to be flowers. No. I remember one time you, oh, I had a guy send me cupcakes. I thought it was so cute. I remember you oh i had a guy send me cupcakes i was so

remember and you had a guy send you oh yours were a little mini cupcakes too made by melissa and we like sat there and we said so cute little things that will keep me like talking to a guy me too even if i don't i felt bad even if i don't like him i'll like still talk totally totally there you go more gifts more the merrier yes we're so okay i have a really fucked up story okay and i want everyone to sit back and relax because i was when i was reading it it was very interesting to me and i i want to try to make sure i get all the details okay okay this is a sugar daddy horror story and i want to read this one because it's very interesting but to anyone that is flirting with the idea of getting sugar daddy they can be great and they can really be fun and

you can have great experiences from them but you can also not and so I just want to like kind of share the less glamorous side of it okay oh god sorry okay terrified hey daddies i want to tell you guys about my sugar daddy experience that i tried within a day of making a profile on seeking arrangements i got over 50 messages from men wanting to meet me so i could be their sugar baby congratulations congrats girl as i, many of them were looking for sex, but I'm not willing to let old wrinkly dicks come near me at this point in my life. So I sifted through the messages and found a guy that seemed respectful, wasn't old as dirt, and best of all, was not looking for sex. We agreed to meet up the next day at a restaurant and my only stipulation was that he

had to give me $500 at the beginning of the date. He agreed, so we met up. Things got weird very fast. When I walked in, he greeted me. He not only weighed 100 more pounds than he did in the picture on his profile, but I think he used a picture that had been from 10 to 15 years ago this guy tried telling me that he was 53 he had to be no younger than 70 at this point I probably should have turned my ass around and got out of there but I just drove an hour to get there and I wasn't leaving without that $500 god damn. We sat down and after ordering drinks, I reminded him that he needed to give me $500 at the beginning of the date. Like we agreed on. He seemed reluctant, which was annoying, but eventually he had the cash and he handed it under the table.

As I went to grab it though, he grabbed my leg, leaned over and whispered if i give you this i expect you to come to my house after i buy you this dinner like what the fuck he told me he wasn't looking for sex i was pissed but he was dead serious so i got really scared and for some reason i just said okay i will for the next hour i listened to him talk about his stupid life until he finally said you ready to get out of here to which i said yes as. As we were walking to our cars, he tells me to ride in his car to his place and then he'd take me back to my car later. Uh, no fucking thank you. I said that I would follow him and after trying to convince me to get in his car for five minutes, he finally gave up. I followed his car for a couple of blocks

and then I turned down a random street quickly and just booked it. I got on the highway and started heading home. A couple minutes later, I look in my rearview mirror and I could not believe what I was seeing. There he was, the creepy fucking guy. He had somehow found me and was following my car so close that our bumpers were touching. He kept this up for 10 fucking miles all while constantly calling me

and texting me threats i was weaving in between cars trying to lose him but he constantly stayed within five feet behind me i was absolutely terrified mortified and thought he was going to try to run me off the fucking road and kill me it was becoming slowly a horror story so i called 911 and the officer instructed me to pull off on the next exit and have him follow me to a police station, which he did. I pulled into the police station and he followed right behind and even parked right next to me and was getting out of the car. The cops ended up swarming his car and I'm not sure if he got in trouble or not, but the officers pulled me quickly into the station and I was safe and then they got me home safely. I just wanted to share this story so hopefully to prevent anything else from happening to anyone else it was truly traumatizing and terrifying but at least i got to keep the 500 dollars okay i wanted to bring this up because like

i was just trying to put myself in that position i feel like i'm that girl right now i'm like scared can you fucking imagine first and foremost kudos to this fucking girl for not getting in his fucking car i was about to say like she played that card so fucking great so i totally understand in the heat of the moment she was nervous and she said okay i will go back to your place the fact that don't ever get in someone's fucking car especially because no one knew where the fuck she was also just to back up thank God she met him at a restaurant in a public setting. Thank God. Guys.

The fact that this man was going to drive you for 10 miles behind you over 500 bucks, first of all, means he probably does not have that much fucking money. Right. And second of all, you, yes, meeting in a public place is so important for your first time, guys. And I think it's so scary. Don't ever get in a fucking car with so important for your first time guys and i think it's so scary don't ever get in a fucking car with someone that you don't know and a lot of times in these sugar daddy situations i know it may be something that girls are embarrassed and you don't have to tell

your families or anything make sure you're always telling one fucking person where you're at yeah i swear to you girls like having just one friend that you can confide in and be like listen like i'm gonna eat you don't even have to fully tell them who you're meeting or something but just be like i'm going here on a date right and i want to let you know because if you're going somewhere alone it's just not safe but like can you fucking imagine driving and you see this guy behind you like literally bumper to bumper when you said that that was so terrifying and that's so smart if you're ever if someone's ever following you pull into the nearest police station i think it was so yeah smart for her to call the police and they

instructed her where to go like it's just i started thinking like oh my god like is she gonna run out of gas right right and then be on the side of the freeway and then she's gonna pull over like no never get out of your fucking car and like go to a public spot so i just wanted to i know it's like a little dark and whatever but i do think it's important to like bring it up because safety um for the call her daddy gang it's important wow what a story yeah okay i went on a date with this guy from my gym we went out to eat and then i came back to his place we were both drinking for a while and then began hooking up on the couch he took off my pants as we were making out then stopped and said he had to pee so i'm

sitting on his couch well first of all the pee thing okay can we quickly address that it's so interesting you're bringing this up yes because i was talking about this to sofia the other day and i was like i swear to fucking god every girl you need to be ready. Men, when they are about to hook up with you, it's basically an indicator they're going to try to fuck you or get their dick sucked when they go pee. It's almost rude. It is. It's almost rude because if I'm making out with a guy

and things are getting sexual and he's like, I got to go pee. I'm like, oh, so you think you're just going to fuck me? Right. It's literally so- They have to go pee. They have to go pee before they have sex or before they get their dick sucked because like when they're coming i know milf hunter always talks about it like he's so scarred his one friend

ended up like kind of peeing in a girl's mouth with his cum like it was fucked up and so men always pee and the worst is because they always do it and you are laying there naked with your fucking belly out and your fucking flaps out titties in the armpits and you're like i now i'm not in the mood because you left me here and there's breeze in my pussy yeah it's like laying there as a starfish on his bed for however long you're like hey how's it going and it's like and then when he comes back you're like did you wash your hands did you wash your pee pee i don't want to you right you're like hey i guess i should go Anyways, right great. Okay So I'm sitting on his couch Pantless waiting for him

To come back and 10 minutes go by Then 15 he's still in the bathroom 20 minutes go by at this Point I got so frustrated put my pants back On walked up the stairs to where the bathroom was I'm not even I'm not even Halfway up the stairs when I hear Snoring coming from the

Bathroom I thought she was going to say the bedroom. He's like, went to bed. Little just went to bed. Peace out. She's not that hot. This guy fell asleep in the bathroom and left my horny ass waiting on the couch for him downstairs. I knocked on the door a few times and said his name. No response. I was not about to even try to open the door. So I just left. A few hours later, he texted me and said he felt dizzy while he was peeing so he had laid down on the bathroom floor for a minute and must have passed out what do you fathers think should i give this guy another chance or call it a day okay i think they she said

she prefaced it by saying they were both intoxicated so i think if it was just like a one-time thing i would let it slide but i would absolutely fuck with him oh if listen it's sad it's sad that you know maybe he felt a little dizzy dizzy but if he and again yes give him another chance if this is a one-time thing yeah absolutely fuck with him fuck grab the sharpie fucking draw a mustache on him take a picture bring it upstairs put it over his body draw a little fuck you with it and you go home i i would be pissed i would be pissed too so girlfriend i would give him another chance it's again it's one thing if this happens all the fucking time how do you respond to someone when they ask what's your talent in bed oh do i say writing you help what a great question first of all i think that's kind of a juvenile question to ask i hate that

question i think but i'm pretty sure when i was younger guys would ask me that like when you're younger you're like oh like what's your specialty? We know what Alex was saying. Alex was like, your dick, my mouth, tonight, let's go. That's the thing. Like in college, I may have said that, but you're right. It's so juvenile. I would never say that anymore.

Because I think it's way better to not play up something you're good at and then surprise them. You say, why don't you find out? Why don't you find out for yourself? Why don't you find out? Because anything you say you say why don't you find out yeah why don't you find out why don't you find out because anything you say is gonna sound dumb and also reverse cowgirl laying on my back i really know how to throw it back i'm really good at getting you now i'm so good at getting my pussy that's actually so actually that would be such a funny comeback yeah i'm really good at getting my pussy yeah haha i fucking do it like a pro but i do think also keep in mind girls whenever a guy asks you something you're good at pro tip i don't answer don't answer and don't give him something that you are good at so that you can shot like it's so much better when they

don't expect it and if you're even also it puts pressure if you specify one thing i'm really good at writing and then imagine when you're getting up there you're like holy fuck he thinks i'm about to really turn out and it's like okay that reminds me when this is so dumb but when lauren conrad was in an interview and they asked her what her favorite position was and she said CEO, but they were like literally asking her her favorite position in bed because it's kind of degrading to ask questions. It is. Oh my God. I forgot.

So fucking respond and be like either respond and be like find out or like I'm really good at getting getting, you know, thank you. Boom. That's such a good one. That's a good one to end on. Yes. Daddy. Motherf such a good one. Boom. That's a good one to end on. Yes. Daddy motherfucking gang. We are shadow band.

We are shadow band. From Instagram and the world. Yeah. And the world. Yeah. A lot of Spotify. People couldn't find us on Spotify, Apple. It's happening everywhere.

It's an epidemic. Yeah. So go follow our personals. It's Sophia with an F, Franklin with a Y. And then Alex Cooper. Alexandra Cooper. You're trying to fuck me. Oh, wow. follow our personals it's sofia then f franklin with y and then alex cooper alexandra you're trying to you're trying to fuck me oh wow it's alexandra cooper thank you fuck you sofia yeah guys go follow us on instagram you know it's it's just sad being a shadow ban i feel yeah alone and

if there's anything from this episode that people need to know like how to take a fucking nude fucking send the link to this episode yes send the link you guys let them know what's up we love you guys rate us five stars because we're the five stars in your life and you're the five stars in ours bye daddy bye daddy gang we love you