Call Her Daddy - Demi Lovato (FBF)

Episode Date: June 28, 2024

Father Cooper sits down with Demi Lovato. Demi exposes the reality of what it was like to be one of the biggest stars on the Disney Channel. How much of Demi’s personal life did Disney have control over and what the fuck was up with the purity rings? Demi outlines how extreme management evolved into manipulation and brainwashing which led to drugs and alcohol. Now free of the control, Demi reflects back on problematic relationships and opens up about which relationship inspired the song "29." Holy Fuck…Demi shares all about sex and dating and discusses a new relationship. This episode discusses adult subject matter, including descriptions of emotional and physical abuse, eating disorders, and substance abuse and is intended for adult consumption only. Listener discretion is advised. Resources: If you have been affected by domestic abuse, free, confidential support is available 24/7 through the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 800.799.7233 and online at www.thehotline.org. Text or call the NEDA helpline for support, resources, and treatment options for yourself or a loved one who is struggling with an eating disorder at 800.931.2237 and online at www.nationaleatingdisorders.org The National Drug Helpline is open to any individual dealing with addiction issues, including family members and other loved ones. Resources are available for those struggling with any addictive substance, including alcohol, and professionals are available to help 24/7/365 at 1-844-289-0879

it's a bop thing like it's giving me old demi vibes like yes oh i love that you know old demi oh my god are you kidding me did you forget oh do you know how many times i've cried over that in my bedroom like oh my god like in a good way like yes and i'd be like demi's with me i are you kidding if we repeat some of this just pretend like it didn't happen before because this is all great yeah we need to stop. Are we ready guys? Let's get started. What is up, daddy gang? It is your founding father, Alex Cooper with Call Her Daddy.

Demi Lovato, welcome to Call Her Daddy. Thank you. It is such an honor to have you here and I want to say it's a big deal you're here for many reasons oh my god thank you of course but I've had sometimes people like come on if they're like a fan of the show but you are the first person I have ever had on call her daddy whose mom is a fan of call her daddy shout out Demi's mom yes my mom loves this podcast. And she was like, you have to say hi. I was like, of course. We are recording this just before your 30th birthday. Yes. Leo season. What does turning 30 mean to you? Turning 30, what it means to me is like, to be honest, I've had a little anxiety.

My 20s were like such a mess. Like I was trying trying to figure myself out I didn't know who I was a lot of shit happened and then I kind of like over the past couple years have eased into who I am and then this year I'm like oh I know who I am so turning 30 to me has been like I'm excited for my 30s and what that holds I love that and I really want to normalize that because I feel like there's such pressure in society of like when you hit 30 like figure it out and it's like what the fuck no 20s are meant to do all the fuck ups and then 30s is when it's like let me come into my own and really figure yes exactly I love that thank you Thank you. You were one of the voices of our generation.

I started listening to your music in middle school, crying up against the window. Did you forget forget like fully singing all my heartbreaks I'm like curled up with Demi I feel like I already know you like truly it's been a roller coaster I feel like I've literally known you for so long and I still love your fucking music oh thank you were you always a natural performer? I think that performer, no, I wasn't always a natural performer. I had some like adjusting that I had to do over time. I started performing on tour with the Jonas Brothers when I was 15. And so and I went from my first show in June of like 2008. It had like 100 people to July, my first show with the Jonas Brothers was 18,000

people. So I had to like, learn how to perform on these massive stages. And it was super intimidating. I was so nervous. But like, I figured it out. And I found my groove. But I have always been a vocalist. Like, you know, singing has always come natural to me. My first time singing on stage was when I was like five and at my talent show in kindergarten. What did you sing? Celine Dion's My Heart Will Go On. Which is like one of the hardest songs to sing. But I was like, yeah, I'm going to tackle that.

I was just about to say Demi. I'm like thinking like, ooh, like maybe like a pop song she's like Celine Dion like what's that I'm like Demi you just go right for the most iconic singer hardest song to sing like classic um okay so someone had a little confidence back then there you go I love that yeah and my mom like also I was raised with like Aretha Franklin and vocalists like that and then when I started learning vocalists that were in the era of when I was growing up it was Christina Aguilera and Kelly Clarkson and those were the singers that I gravitated to because they did things with their voices that I couldn't and I wanted to learn how so I made it my mission and was like, whoever is really, really talented,

I want to do what they do. And so I just sang and sang and sang my little heart out until I could hit the same notes as them. And then you eventually absolutely got there. So for someone watching this, kind of going back to your childhood a little bit, to kind of paint the picture, you're growing up and your parents split when you were really young. Did your biological dad have any input when you began

working as a kid? No. So my biological dad, he was mentally ill and had a lot of addiction problems. And so he wasn't really in my life at all. I mean, I was the one that would reach out and call him, but like he was really sick mentally. And so over the years, I slowly stopped reaching out and calling him because he was so sick. It was hard to have conversations with him. He was schizophrenic and he had delusions. And so our conversations went from, how are you? I miss you, to I'm doing a movie with Steven Spielberg and Jodie Foster's my girlfriend. And I'm like, OK, we like can't talk anymore. And so I guarded myself from that relationship.

And he didn't have a say, but he was proud. He was really proud. When I would talk to was proud he was really proud when I would talk to him he was really proud and there was a lot to be proud for technically your start in the business was you started in pageants right yes I started in beauty pageants when I was seven and my first like big win was mini miss Texas yeah that was my introduction and then from there I got an acting coach and I started doing acting in your documentary simply complicated your mom who was a former Dallas Cowboys cheerleader she acknowledges her emphasis on being skinny and being perfect affected you yeah how did your mom's opinion about herself affect your opinion about yourself?

Well, look, my mom had an eating disorder. And so naturally, someone that's in their eating disorder who isn't aware of it can pass on things to their child. And so I put a lot of pressure on myself and the beauty pageants to look a certain way. I mean, I'm going to go on the record here and say like beauty pageants are awful for children's self-esteem. And like they teach you to ignore your emotions until you go to your hotel room and that's when you can cry it out. And it was this toxic environment of like who's more beautiful and things like that. And at such a young age it confuses you and so over the years I developed my own eating disorder and that bled

into my career as well when you're performing you have to be okay you got to go up there you got to put a smile on your face got to make everyone else feel. But that's not how you felt on the inside. What do you remember depression feeling like as a seven-year-old? As a seven-year-old, when my depression started to kick in, it was more of like this fascination of death. And for some reason, I had this like understanding that life was only going to get more difficult and so I had suicidal ideations from age of seven so much so that like my school called my parents and they had me sign like this contract saying that I wouldn't do anything to myself. And so I entered therapy and guidance counseling at the school at seven years old. And, you know, it's something that I still deal with occasionally.

And I just think it's a part of, it's just something that I've learned to accept and manage. Yeah. When your parents got that call and you got into therapy was there like regular check-ins and because you were working also at the time at a young age like was there a regimen of like checking in on Demi and making sure she was okay I was so young that I don't really remember and I remember the the person that actually saw the contract was my great grandmother because I was I went to her house afterwards and she was like well please don't do that like are you okay and um and so yeah there's probably check-ins but I don't really remember them because I was so young what was your peer dynamic when you were in school my peer dynamic when I was in school was difficult. You know, I was thrown from being on Barney where I homeschooled for like a year. Then I went back to school and I'd actually learned more when I was homeschooling to where

like when I went back to school, I was like helping her show the class like this is what I've learned and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. But when I went back to school, you know, there was a lot of drama. There was a lot of, it was the, the sixth grade, seventh grade drama. That's the worst. It's the absolute worst with preteen girls. They're just mean. That age is when like, I personally know like bullying started for me. Like that is the worst fucking age. That's when it all goes down what were you bullied for so there was this whole incident where the main week that I was bullied um I had actually gotten the opportunity I was already performing at like you know USO bases and like little um car dealerships here and there that

would have like festivals and whatever I had the opportunity to open for Jojo the singer and this was when get out leave was like on top of the charts and and as a pre-teen we're all like go Jojo because she's our age right so anyways she I had the opportunity to open for and I invited one of the girls that was in my clique of friends and I got the opportunity to open for her and I invited one of the girls that was in my clique of friends. And I got the opportunity to go backstage and meet her after I opened for her. And the other girl didn't. And I used her camera. It was like this disposable camera.

And when I got back to school, she gave me all the pictures from the show. But the one of me and JoJo was missing. And I was like, where did that one go? And she was like, oh, it just didn't develop. And I was like, bitch, like I know that it developed and you're just salty about it. So that week turned into like hell for me. And all of a sudden it turned. Well, there was drama around that, the picture not showing up.

But then people took sides and I remember it was like mean girls like walking into the cafeteria where like the popular girls hated me anybody that wanted to be popular hated me the popular guys hated me and they have all the power in school and at one point I was like hiding in a bathroom and I called my mom and I was like, I need to get out of here. They signed a suicide petition. They passed it around and got people to sign it saying if you we want Demi to kill herself. And. It was just it was awful and so um and they said some other mean stuff in there that like

was just really hurtful and so I ended up leaving and homeschooling and it was a blessing in disguise because it gave me motivation to keep going and it also gave me all this free time after I did my school work to practice music for three four hours day. And I did that for years. You were kind of getting bullied, I think, because you were having success, right? Like, you were kind of starting to make it. People were jealous. At that age, they're super insecure. We all know how that goes. But do you think you then leaned into your craft because it was kind of like your escape from what you'd been going through? I leaned into my craft, but I also leaned into my eating disorder because the reasons that they gave me for bullying where they were like, you're a slut, you're a whore. Meanwhile, I'm 12 and I've only had my first kiss.

And they were like, and you're fat. And they started calling the house saying they were from Jenny Craig and they wanted Demi. And so I was like, well, I guess that's their reason for me being hated so much. I guess it's because I'm fat. And I developed an eating disorder at 12. And it was really hard. But yes, at the same time, I used it as motivation. Like, I'm going to make my name so in your face that you can never escape me again. And it felt really good when that finally came true so you make it to Disney Channel yes which I was saying is basically and winning an

Oscar as a child like at that age are you kidding let's watch a Disney Channel movie I'm like okay like I can you tell I've literally watched all of it I did too I did everything to paint the picture like who was also acting on Disney around that same time as you? It was the golden era of Disney. I mean, there was one golden era where it was like Raven and Hilary Duff. And then it like moved into this other golden era where it was like Hannah Montana had just started like a year or so before. High School Musical had just happened. Selena was on wizards and I auditioned for

the Jonas Brothers TV show. And I was up for the role of their like female best friend or whatever. And I remember I didn't get it and I was crushed. I was heartbroken, but Disney was like, but we want to see you for these other two projects. And I was like, OK, like I had taken the hardest no in my life. And I was just like, I don't know if I want to go audition again, but I will. So I did. I went and audition movie and my own tv show are you kidding like on Disney channel and I knew my life was about to change was there competition amongst the big actors on Disney even though I'm a competitive person I really like quieted that voice because I was like it's not worth it we all have our own talents and that's why I'm not jealous of any artists today is because like we all have our own lanes and someone has to fill my lane. You know, as like a young girl watching those shows, I was always like Demi seems like she would like I could be friends with her. Oh, thank you.

Eating my hair in my room. Like I could be eating my hair. The most perfect hair, by the way. We've already had this conversation. But it is funny because you really gave that vibe of like relatable and like someone that you could be friends with. It was the bangs. The camp rock bangs. It was the bangs.

It was the bangs and you brought the bangs back today. Today. Okay. What pieces of your personal life did Disney have a say on once you started working with them? So there were expectations on you to be a role model because all of a sudden you're thrust into that position whether you want to be or not. Like you're on shows that kids are watching. You can't be seen at a party with a red cup in your hand because it looks

like it could be alcohol. And people online, like there was this website called Ocean Up, and Ocean Up would just like take all scandalous things that were happening to Disney actors and put it on there. And so we lived in fear of that website it wasn't really ever Disney saying you can't do this you can't do that but if something happened there would be conversations and I will say that like that pressure of your replaceable was always there not necessarily ever said by Disney but they didn't have to because it was like Disney is the hottest thing for teenagers to be on and there are millions of kids that want to be in your place and so you have to be on your best behavior or else you know there's the next girl in line that could book the movie that you're supposed to be in what people

don't know is that the amount of work we had to do. Every year I filmed a season of a TV show. I went on tour. I made an album and I shot a movie. And I did that for like three or four years. I think it was three. But if I had a hiatus from my show, I would have the tour bus pull up to the studio and take me on tour for one week.

Or I would fly to London to do promo. And I remember one day I woke up, I was so tired and like just drained from how much work I was doing. As a 16 year old, I woke up and I just started crying. And my mom was like, what's wrong? And I was like, I'm so tired. And then she started crying too. She was like, me too. And it was like this sad kind of hilarious moment. And we were like, okay, put, you know, put ourselves together. We got to do this. And so there was this extreme workload that I think put a lot of pressure on us. And that's why some of us turned to,

I personally turned to, if you're going to work me like an adult, I'm going to party like an adult. And that at 16, 17, wasn't healthy healthy at all when you had that moment with your mom do you wonder if she ever thought to be like hey like you don't have to you know I think my parents were also under the you know impression that someone will take your place if you don't commit to this stuff and so I'd sit down with my management and my dad and we'd go over the schedule and the thing was is I was also bipolar and so and I was unmedicated so there would be times where I'd have this like all this energy and I'd look at my schedule and be like I can do that that that that plus this is the cover of Cosmo like I want to do that it's cover of 17 like I want to do that I didn't want to miss anything I had like

major FOMO if I did so I just kept kept on pushing but then by the time it would get there I'd fall into like a depression and it'd be really hard to work at that age technically at 16 you are the thing that's making all the money for all the people around you. And if you stop, it all ends. And also at a certain point, I was paying for the roof over my whole family's head. And my dad had quit his job to become my manager. So it was his income was coming from me. My mom was a stay at home mom.

Didn't, you know, wasn't reliant on, well, I mean, kind of was, but it was just that pressure of, like, I'm paying for everything and, like, I need to keep going because if things start to disappear, so does the finances. So you reference, if I'm going to be treated like an adult, I'm going to party like an adult. Yes. At what point in your Disney career did you begin experimenting with drugs? so you reference if i'm going to be treated like an adult i'm going to party like an adult yes at what point in your disney career did you begin experimenting with drugs so i started experimenting for the first time when i was 12 i got into 13, I got into a car accident and they prescribed me opiates.

And my mom didn't think that she'd have to like lock up the opiates from her 13 year old daughter, but like I was already drinking at that point. I was, you know, had been bullied, was looking for an escape. And when my mom saw how many of the pills had disappeared and how fast they did, she took them away, locked them up. But yeah, I drank a lot in my teenage years. And then it wasn't until I was about 17 that I started. Well, that's not even true. Like there were times where I'd get certain kinds of pills throughout like 15, 16. I'd steal my mom's Xanax.

She had a Xanax addiction. And like, so it was off and on. And then at 17 is when it kind of was the first time like I tried Coke and like loved it too much. And then that kind of bled into me going to treatment like right when right after I turned 18. When you were drinking, were you drinking alone or were you going out places? My first time drinking, I was alone. And that was like should have been a major red flag.

I like stole beer from my dad in the fridge, my stepdad, and like took it to my room and drank like four beers just to see what it was like to feel drunk and like I was like a little 90 pound you know girl so that was a lot and then it started being with like friends and it was not it wasn't ever alone after that but that was my first time when you're kind of at this age where you start to kind of experiment your drinking and everything, did not only your parents, but like management and publicists, did people know you were drinking and doing drugs? When it came to management's attention that I had been doing pills, they definitely were like, this can't happen. And like,

what's going on? And do we need to get you help? And I was really good at definitely were like, this can't happen. And like, what's going on? And do we need to get you help? And I was really good at convincing people like, no, it was just like, you know, I had hard time sleeping and blah, blah, blah, or I'd make up excuses. And finally, when it got to a point where it was clear that I needed help and I needed to go away, everyone was really supportive of it because it had been like kind of a long time coming so thinking about the whole Disney era I there was a major wave of purity ring wearing I can't even I can't say it with a straight face okay he's like holy fuck oh no pun intended no pun intended there was a huge wave of purity ring wearing amongst Disney stars oh yeah what the

fuck was that about so I think it was just my purity I had a purity ring that came from my church like way before Disney Channel even happened, I was like 11 or 12. And like obviously that's not, that shouldn't have even been implemented on 11 or 12 year olds. But I was like, okay, like I'll do this, whatever. That quickly went out the window at a certain point. And then I left the others to have their purity

adventures on their own but I mean to each their own I don't know it was uh an interesting thing to come out publicly and say it really was because I remember being that age and like I should have been apparently wearing one because I was a catholic at the time god I'm getting like burned but I'm like why are people wearing these things? And it was so such an interesting it almost at the time when I look back on it really felt like the Disney kids like we're getting older and it felt like a way to like really cement like, no, we're really good kids and we don't do anything bad. And it's like, look at my look at my finger like, oh, they wear a purity ring.

Right. I don't I don't do anything bad and it's like look at my look at my finger like oh they wear a purity right I don't I don't know like I had one and I think I talked about it like once but like and it caught a little bit of fire but I definitely not as much as the other people wearing them and I quickly hushed about that when I started having sex because I was like I lost it I don't know where it went it broke I think I'd like I think it actually literally broke because it was so cheap and then I was like well this is that's my sign here we go have you ever sat down and discussed the challenges of being inside this Disney machine with people like Selena Gomez, Miley Cyrus, the Jonas Brothers. I think over the years like we talked about it for sure but I do have a project in the works where I want to talk to some of those people about their

experiences and other child stars as well kind of like we were talking about earlier there were all these systems in place in your life everyone you know they're taking care of your career with you and then well into adulthood your personal life was also being controlled by people that were managing your career demi in what ways was your team controlling your life? There was someone that came into the picture and when they came into the picture, everything in my life was controlled. I started having a sober companion, which was helpful for me, but it should not have lasted

three years. And then it became controlling around my food. And for someone in recovery from an eating disorder, that's so dangerous. It actually exasperated my eating disorder to the point where I became bulimic again. From 2016 to 2018, I was dealing with that. And we're talking like, I've never talked about this before, but there was one time where I had binged and purged one night, and I came clean to my team and said, hey, this happened. You know, I snuck out of my hotel room because they didn't let me have phones in my hotel rooms because they didn't want me to call room service.

I didn't have food in my hotel room like snacks in the mini bar because they didn't want me to eat the snacks. Ellen talked about this on her show where they cleared the dressing room of like all sugar before I would get in there. She was like, I remember that. And they, after I told them what had happened, my security guard walked by my room or was made aware that they had built, they like barricaded me into my hotel room. They put furniture outside of my door so that I couldn't get out and sneak out and eat if I wanted to. And so it was that level of controlling when it came to my food, which just made my eating disorder worse. One time I said, I'm throwing up blood. I need to go to treatment.

I need to get help. And this was in like 2017. And this person looked at me and said you're not sick enough and I think that was his way of saying like no you're not going back to treatment because if you do this will look bad on me and so I didn't I didn't go back into treatment and I you know less than a year later I ended uposing. And so I think it was just like, I felt trapped. I felt like I couldn't get out of the situation. And my way of like, blowing everything up was relapsing on drugs and alcohol, because they always said if you use we're out. And I was like, all right, time to get out. Bye. I've learned a lot from that experience. Like no one can control me anymore. And I was under the control from 18 to 25.

And those are years where you're trying to figure out your adulthood. You know, you're no longer a teenager, but for some reason I had people controlling everything I ate you know my business decisions were always being made for me and now I found my voice no one can ever do that to me again and I feel empowered by what I went through because I had to grow and I had to learn to accept that I'm my own boss. When you, just to clarify, when you're referencing this person is basically trying to keep you from eating, it's for the image to make sure you look thin. Yeah. Which helps their career and their income. Can you talk a little bit about mentally why it's so hard to push away from people that get their claws in you in that position. Yeah, absolutely. I would even go so far as to say like there was a brainwashing element to it where you were totally under the impression that if I don't listen to this person who knows so much

about recovery, I'm going to lose everything. And so you put all of your trust and your faith into one person. And then from that, everyone around me listens to that one person and they go with it. You know, if, if this person says this is what it is and this is how it should be, then we listen to them. And then it became, um, it got to the point where like, if they didn't like a chef that I had, they would sit me down and say like, we don't like the chef that you have. We think that you should try someone else. And so I would say, okay, like I wouldn't, I just put all of my trust and faith into, you know, into people around me that I think didn't like that chef that I had was because the chef told me they said they read your bank statements to see what you order at Starbucks to make sure you're not getting like cookies or pastries or things like that um and when I found that out I told them and then they were like we don't like your chef and I was like oh you you realize that um that she's the one that told me. Hearing you talk about this, it does sound like a version of what Britney Spears went through.

Right. Like the controlling and the, yeah, the micromanaging to the point where you don't even have control over your own life. Right. I can't imagine how alone you felt when you said like they had said if I use then they were gone and then I use and in a way it was almost like your cry for help of like get the fuck away. Right. A lot of people don't understand this side of the world and I think that's why I love having you on right now because people we get headlines e-news says something about and it's like we don't understand what you as a human being

are going through and people are so ruthless to quickly make a judgment of like oh well she's got all the money in the world so her right well and it's like listen to what you're saying right now like this is a nightmare right and I couldn't talk about it I felt trapped and you know I don't know how many people have gone through that situation but it is it is really sad in a bustle article you asked the question what do I want my relationship with my manager to look like without enmeshing my own father issues onto him what did you mean by that how were your father issues affecting your relationship with your manager? I had such interesting relationships with my dads and the abandonment issue from my birth father was so

deeply rooted inside of me that when it came to management, like I put, I placed that fatherly figure role onto him and onto this other person that I have mentioned. And so when looking for a new manager, I wanted to find someone that I don't place that fatherly figure role onto and that it's just business. In your documentary, Dancing with the Devil, yes, you reveal your virginity was taken from you yeah you were raped is it possible to heal from an experience like that i think in a way time can heal wounds maybe not all of them. The more time that has gone by, the easier it has gotten. But there's still a sadness, a deep sadness inside of me that someone took that from me

at such a young age. And it was hard because this person was also around, like they were also on Disney and so um seeing them around was was difficult and it really messed up my um my teenage years and finally I went and got help for that and it's been something that I've worked on but you know I've had other traumas happen and um it kind of pushes those to the side a little bit but there are moments where I like I definitely will cry and just feel the sadness inside of me because you know that's healthy to do rather than bottle it up I just will allow myself to have those moments of like, that was really sad what happened to you. And you're a fighter, like you can get through it. I mean, I can't imagine at that young of an age having to still have someone be on Disney and having to see someone that did that to you. I mean,

you are a survivor. Thank you. And to be clear, like it wasn't anyone in the immediate Disney circle you know like it I've had people ask you know questions of like was it this person or was it that person and it was like I don't think it'd be anybody that anyone would guess but they were friends with someone on set and they'd come around and yeah so many people especially young women listen to my podcast that have been sexually assaulted and it's a really it's complicated if you've never been through it how do you give someone advice on that right and so where have you generated the strength to keep going through trauma I think that I've just had a lot of trauma in my life and there's a persistence a determination inside of me and I think I learned that from like the bullying experience of like you can turn this

around and make it into something great and I'm not saying that I've turned sexual assault into anything great but um you know I've I've written about it in music I've healed from it and um it's just made me stronger you are so fucking strong and it is written all over your new album thank you I was listening to it in my car I feel like that's also the best place to listen to new music when you're like it's the best the best yeah the best you're like by yourself you're listening and you're just like so first of all I just want to say I'm a huge fan of your new album thank you holy fuck holy fuck is the album also holy fuck it's so fucking good thank you Demi I need to know how does this album reflect where you are in your life right now this album um it reflects this album, like actually there's a

journey to it. So like in the beginning of the album, you can hear my anger. You can hear like I left treatment in December this last year, getting help again. And I'm sober again. And I feel great. But like there was all these emotions that I left treatment with and I wanted to convey them in my music. And so the first few songs are like really angry and it's like, this is who I am. Take it or leave it. I know what you're saying about me online. Like Demi leaves rehab again. Like I see you, I hear you. And then as I started to heal, I was like, you know what? I'm actually like getting getting happier and I was owning my sexuality in a lot of the songs and then my album became like so it was like angry then like sex and then like

love songs your songs are incredibly personal and you always give insight into your life and I feel like that's why your fans are obsessed with you it's because you're like you put it all out there and that's why we love Demi Lovato it's like we and and I appreciate that because you know sometimes we don't get a lot from people and you're like this is me this is me this is me but oh my god everyone's like stop Alex but I I appreciate that and in the tone of one of the songs, like you are fucking fighting and you're like, I have something to say and I'm going to address it as I always address my journey.

And I always talk about what the fuck I'm going through. And so why would this be any fucking different on this album? The song 29. Yes. What inspired you to write this song? I went to treatment after turning 29. I did a lot of work on myself. And I had this realization when I turned 29

that I came out of treatment with anger. I came out of treatment with understanding and growth. And so it was like a reflective song for me. And even though there's undertones of anger, it was like, I really learned a lot about that experience. And I decided to write about it. To anyone that hasn't listened to the song, you need to go listen to it. Just a couple of the lines to give them a too young to drink wine just five years a bleeder student and a teacher far from innocent what the fuck is consent numbers told you not to but that didn't stop you now i'm finally 29 funny just like you were at the time what do you hope people take away from these lyrics. If you're a young girl and you think that it's

sexy or fun to date older men, it's not okay unless you're of age. It's portrayed as like, oh, you scored someone older. That's cool. And it's like, actually, that's cool and it's like actually that's weird so it's just like a reflective moment of like if you are in that situation just listen to this song and like kind of think about it how did you decide to release it as a single well um it was hard it was really hard for me to release this as a single because it's so emotional for me and so personal. But I think sometimes the public needs the truth. And that's why I decided to release it as a single because I think the message is so important. what is your favorite song on the album to have sex to you're saying favorite first of all i don't have sex to my own music Demi come on I'll have sex to your music go for it go for it um I just I feel I would feel weird about it if you had to

if I had to people listening which song should they fuck to uh well it depends if you're trying to be like like sensual and sensual listen to come together if you're trying to like bang it out bang it out you know what if you're trying to bang it out listen to bones bones is like it's like i want to jump your bones that's the that's the hook we are not in disneyland anymore guys dis Disney Channel is dead Demi fucking Lovato You are fucking back with a vengeance I'm obsessed Speaking of sex Demi Are you dating anyone

I Yeah I'm dating somebody Look at that grip Okay we don't need like too many deets But like how's it going Like what's the vibe It's going really yeah can I say that it's your life okay yeah it's my life no more looking at your team yeah it's your fucking life it's my life yeah um it's going

really well yeah okay when you're dating someone what is the most important thing you look for in a partner I have to laugh like someone I've been you know I've dated people that were beautiful or you know sexy and it's like um I still am like that the person I'm dating is so hot and so sexy and I am obsessed but like I the most important thing is like eventually over time, you know, we grow old and looks fade and things like that. Like you have to find someone that completely understands you. But most importantly to me makes me laugh.

I'm like so happy for you because I can tell it's like fresh and it's great because you are fully, fully blushing. You're like, stop. Demi knew you. We don't fucking ask for permission. What do you want to say? That's true. What do you want to say?

That's true. We're not saying names here unless you want to say his name. Okay. You're going to go on tour, right? Yes. So excited. Is it hard to date while you're on tour? I found that it's actually kind of easy if you make sure that you see each other like

once every two three weeks okay fun um it's important to like to and it's also facetime like facetime is really helpful um and i'm sure like it's like i think what's gonna suck is being away from the person that you're dating but like ultimately it kind of builds anticipation too for when you do see them and it's like so exciting you know so exciting and I think it's also the test of like if you can make it through that yes like that's a great strength building core exercise what the fuck um okay when you go on tour what are you looking looking most forward to when you're going on this upcoming tour? Rocking out because I did the pop music and kind of R&B pop, which was fun.

But also at the same time, I felt like it wasn't me. Like I was trying too hard to be sexy. And I was in the little leotards and the stiletto heels. And I wasn't comfortable. And so I want to be comfortable on the stage. And I was in the little leotards and the, you know, stiletto heels and I wasn't comfortable. And so I want to be comfortable on the stage and I will be. And I can just completely be myself, which is going to be so exciting. Will we be seeing like a little old Demi music vibe also on tour? Old music, yes.

You will definitely, because it matches the sound and I've also which is the most exciting I've also turned like my hits into the style of music that I'm doing today so like you know cool for the summer sounds totally different heart attack sounds totally different confidence sounds totally different and it's like it's so exciting sorry not sorry like all of those songs sound totally different and I'm like so excited for everyone to hear it you know I started out with really great instincts on how to be myself and I strayed away from it because I wanted I wanted hits I wanted what people wanted to hear and so I lost myself for a long period of time when it came to me musically and I've never had an experience in the studio

like I've had making this album where it's just so fulfilling, so myself. And it's just so fun to sing and I can't wait to perform it. Demi Lovato, thank you so much for coming on Call Her Daddy. Thank you. Thank you so much.