Call Her Daddy - Let’s Get High: 4/20 Edition (REVISIT)

Episode Date: September 14, 2022

Daddy Gang, while CHD is on a quick break, check out this revisit of a past favorite episode. New episodes of CHD will return on 9/28. (VIDEO PODCAST) Listen and watch your father as she gets stoned out of her mind in celebration of 4/20. Before getting completely baked, Big Al reminisces on the first time she got high- it was her, three men, in a car, with a water bottle. Do you like to fuck while you’re high? Al does! Your dad shares the first time she got stoned, with the ultimate pothead, Slim Shady (and trust me he’s no Angel). It resulted in a sexual nightmare. And, with baseball season upon us, Alex found a way to throw two other MLB teams under the bus by sharing the shopping list of drugs they demanded she buy them. But hey, it’s their money!! As the weed sets in, Alex get’s deep, answering the philosophical questions you all want to know the answers to. The munchies hit - so join your Papa in the kitchen while she makes her favorite high snack. She didn’t burn the house down… that’s a win. Watch Alex like you’ve never seen her before…taking a gravity bong to the face. Come get stoned with your dad and let’s celebrate this holiday.

Hello, Daddy Gang. We need to talk, okay? We're going on a break. Sad. Well, not really. We're going on a break because we are taking two weeks off to reset for season two of Call Her Daddy on Spotify. I've seen you guys in my DMs. Hey, Big Al, what the fuck is a season? You've been doing this podcast for about four plus years. Why is it just season two? The beauty of being your own boss is you get to just make shit up. So season one of Call Her Daddy with Spotify was my first year with Spotify. I have a three year deal.

Now we're entering the second year, a.k.a. season two. Things are coming your way. September 28th is the kickoff to season two of Call Her Daddy. But until then, I'm going to re-release an episode because not putting something out just feels icky and wrong. Like I'm cheating on you. Never unfaithful, disloyal. It doesn't matter. I'm always going to be loyal to you guys. I can't cheat on you guys if I'm on a break. Today, I'm re-releasing my 420 episode this bitch got high as a goddamn kite we eat we talk shit on my exes on my life on myself on the

world and it's a really honestly great lesson and I sometimes when I'm high like to re-watch it so daddy gang maybe get high oh I don't encourage that unless you live in a state where it's legal get fucking high have a drink do whatever the fuck you need to do enjoy yourself and enjoy this 420 episode and i will be back september 28th goodbye go eat a fucking quesadilla what is up daddy gang it is your founding father, Alex Cooper, with Call Her Daddy. The first time I got high was in high school. I never had any interest in smoking, and then I met this boy. And he lived in the neighborhood across from me, and we started hooking up,

and I remember he was a big pothead and so naturally I wanted to smoke with him I will never forget it was a Friday I get home from school he texts me he's like hey do you want to hang out me my friends are going to go smoke I was so nervous but I was just happy he was texting me. So I was like, yeah, he picks me up. It's three of him and his friends. And then me, we drive to like a random neighborhood nearby. We park the car and I'm thinking like, I've seen this in movies. Like it's going to look like a cigarette and I'm going to take a little hit and things will be all right. And then his friend pulls out a water bottle and and I'm, like, thinking in my head, like, what, what is going on, and it's sideways, and there's a hole in the water bottle, and I remember wanting to die, because everyone in the car knew how to do it, I had no idea what I was going to do,

but I, like, liked him so much, I didn't want to feel like a fucking prude, which now, in hindsight, it's like, why didn't you just be like, how do I do this, but I didn't want to say I didn't know how to do it, so the water bottle's getting passed around and I'm like trying to peek, like see how they're doing it because I'm like, I don't know what I'm doing. They're doing something with the cap and taking the cap off, but I could not get a hint of how to do it. Finally, his friend in the backseat with me passes me the water bottle and I have no idea what to do.

And so I kind of like, I'm like awkwardly stalling because in my mind, I'm like, let me wait for them all to be like talking and not paying attention so they don't see me if I fuck this up and be embarrassing. I finally catch a moment where they're all talking about something. I go and light it. I burn the fuck out of my finger. I don't know to take the top off and I'm sucking and nothing's happening. And his friend turns and looks at me

and he's like, wait, let me help you. And I'm like, RIP to me. I take the biggest hit and I just start hacking. I am coughing my head off. I'm so embarrassed and I get fucking high as shit. Ryan and I drive back to my house. We show up. My dad is sitting in the living room watching some sports game.

I walk in. I'm like high as balls. Hey, dad. Hey, Alex. I've never been allowed to go in the basement with a guy alone. I just saunter down there with Ryan and just closed the door. Don't even ask my parents if I'm allowed. I'm so fucking high.

And we go downstairs. And my dad to this day now tells me he was like texted my mom and was like, is this okay? Like she just went downstairs with the boy. Meanwhile, I can now tell him, dad, nothing happened. I remember staring at the ceiling and I felt like the ceiling was the floor and the floor was rotating up to the ceiling and everything just kept like moving. And I felt like fucking shit. And I was so scared, but I was trying to play it off after that though. Like I did smoke a couple more times with him. I got my tolerance up. My next boyfriend smoked.

And then all of high school, I just kind of like started smoking it's interesting because my parents never really talked to me about weed it was more like my coaches were like I know you guys are going to be on campus and there's going to be people that are doing shit, but like, you guys can't do that as athletes. When someone tells me you can't do something, I do it. So I naturally was like, oh, I want to do it. Um, but no, my parents were like pretty, like they were really strict, but I don't remember them having a conversation with me about drugs ever. It was overall drugs. Yes. Like do not do drugs. Like you will fucking die. But when it came to weed, they never talked about weed in a negative way or ever brought it up. So I was like, let's go, let's fucking go. So it was weird

because I went from smoking a pretty good amount in high school because then I went on to date this guy that was an even bigger stoner and so I was like smoking a lot and then I went to college and I played soccer in college and when you're playing d1 they are going to drug test you randomly and my coach fucking hated me and so I somehow I was always the one that got the random drug testing I'm like you fucking bitch like because I knew she thought I was a partier anyway so getting to college it really wasn't hard for me to not like just stop smoking I think because like when I got to college I was like holy fuck I have like a full-time fucking job being an

athlete I didn't even want to smoke. But then towards like, I would say summer and shit, someone could still get called in for a random drug testing in summer and summer. I was a full degenerate partying my ass off all the time in Boston. And so I definitely wanted to smoke during summer. But I will say in my three years of college, I never smoked. And it wasn't that hard for me. I just hit the bottle pretty hard and just drank my life away. And I didn't need the weed. I didn't play my senior year, which I've always said, like one day I'll tell that story. But so my senior year, I think I was like in a very, like I was in a heavy, deep depression because I wasn't playing soccer. So my natural reaction

wasn't to be fully self-destructive and be like, I'm going to start now smoking and drinking. But then I met this boy and his name is Slim Shady and he is the biggest fucking pothead I know. And so all of a sudden I started to fly to see him at spring training and I would fly to see him in New York and he smokes like 10 times a fucking day. And I then was like, you know what? Let's pop that cherry again. Let's fucking go. And so I will never forget the first time I smoked after years, he's playing the Phillies in Philadelphia. I go and meet him because I was back home for some reason. So I like drive into

the city. I'm staying in the hotel with him and he's like, do you want to smoke? And I'm like, let's go. So we smoke a joint. I still in my mind had the mentality that I was at high school or that like my tolerance is up, baby. Like let's take multiple hits. Let's finish this fucking joint. I am so high. I am at the point too with Slim Shady where I wasn't like fully, fully comfortable with him. We weren't officially dating yet. So we're like, I'm in the talking stage with this dude that's like this professional athlete. I'm trying to be suave.

I'm trying to be cool. We go to start hooking up and I will never forget it. It's the most embarrassing fucking thing. I am high out of my fucking mind. And I remember him taking my pants off. And I quite literally did not realize how high I was that, you know, if you're really high, you can either get super relaxed if you're relaxed when you're high, or if you are paranoid because you haven't smoked in a while, your body gets so tense. All of a sudden I hear Slim Shady go, babe, you need to relax your legs. I was doing a glute

bridge like this. And he's like, can you put your fucking legs down? I was literally clenching and clenching. And he was like, babe, you need, can you relax? And so I'm like, in that moment, I wanted to fucking die. I'm doing a glute bridge pre-sex. And I realized in that moment, like, oh my God, I'm so high. Like I didn't even feel him touching my body. I'm like in the clouds, like I'm in a different universe. And so that was my introduction back to smoking weed. And I was like, Jesus Christ, I'm such a fucking little bitch right now. I have no tolerance. Who did I think I was to be able to fucking take basically down a joint with this dude that smokes every day? So that was embarrassing.

But I don't know if anyone in the Daddy Gang can relate to this. But a part of, you know, having experiences with men is you look back sometimes and you're like, why was I so fucking obsessed with his opinion of me? Oh, I don't have as much of a tolerance as you and your six foot six teammates. Ooh, that makes me what? Like awkward? No. Anything with drugs, if you're trying to impress someone, don't do that. Don't do that. That's really stupid. But young Alex was naive. She wanted to fit in and she wanted to rip that bowl like the best of them my relationship to high sex was not wanting to have high sex until I finally got my tolerance that I was like oh there's nothing better than high sex and that's like a fucking fact you literally feel like every

motion every like sensory like your clit is 10 times. I feel like more sensitive. I'm personally more in the moment of like the sensations and the feelings rather than like going through the motions. Like if someone starts eating me out when I'm high, I'm so relaxed. And like, also time is not of the essence in your head when you're fucking sober. I'm sorry. But if a guy's been down there for 20 minutes, you're like, I gotta pull him up or I gotta fake it. I feel bad. When you're high, I'm like, an hour has gone by.

Kumbaya, motherfucker, stay down there. This feels great. Like you're more relaxed. You're more in tune with the feeling. And then sex is 10 times fucking better. I also feel like I'm like nastier when I'm having sex high. In the early stages of Call Her Daddy, I realized a lot of the sex moves that I was coming up with and sharing with my listeners was from high sex because I was so in tune with

like quite literally each detail. And then I wrapped my leg. And then I went like back and forth, up and down on the day. Like there were like, I could so clearly envision what was working and what felt good. So I don't know. High sex is just like, it basically just amplifies your experience. And that's just like science. Guys, welcome to science class on Call Her Daddy.

So my high routine has really I think been the same most of my life I don't like to be high during the day I mean at least Monday through Friday I'm a businesswoman the only time I would get high during the day is if creatively I'm like I need to go to a different place, get some inspiration, find my shit. Then yes, I will take a little edible during the day, maybe go smoke a blunt, do something chill and kind of sit down with my laptop and just like relax and chill. But most of the time throughout the week during the day, I would never smoke. I'm more of a nighttime smoker. I also will say I love smoking alone. I love my alone time. I love being alone with my thoughts. And so I love to just like get high as fuck, have a lot of food around me and

just sit and like, whether it's type on my computer, my thoughts, watch TV, zone out, come up with ideas. So my idea of smoking for me is nighttime. I do, I will do it with my partner. I don't love smoking in big groups unless they're like my straight, like homies, best friends. Like it's Lauren sitting next to me. Like I cannot be with some like random bitches that I barely know, unless as of recent, my tolerance was super high. Then I like I can I can smoke with anyone but because I don't like smoke every single day like I used to I'm just kind of like I like to be alone I like to relax dude it's so crazy because there's people watching this right now and it's like this is legal everything you're seeing here is legal you cannot arrest me I live in California but which

is so fucking dope and it should be legalized everywhere but I will say now it's been dope because like you almost like feel more comfortable talking about it more and it's more almost like socially acceptable because it's been legalized I feel like some people used to look at people that smoked all the time like oh you're a pothead you're a degenerate. There's such a beautiful aspect to it being legalized because I think it now is less judged by other people that maybe don't smoke. And I would say going to a dispensary. The first time I went to a dispensary, I was in Seattle and it was like a couple of years ago. I was visiting door number three. He was playing, who is the Seattle team?

The Mariners? Yeah. So he was going to the field and he was like who is the Seattle team the Mariners yeah so he was going to the field and he was like all my teammates and I we need you to do a run for us and I was like and I'll do one for myself I had a full list that the entire either the Braves or the Tigers basically gave me to go get weed for all of them I have like a shopping list and I'm like on my way to the dispensary in Seattle. And I went and it was so cool. Everyone was so happy. I remember feeling so connected to everyone and I bought so much fucking weed, went back, got high. And it was like, damn, I just went like shopping for groceries. And I just came back with a fucking shit ton of blunts and e-pens and all this shit. And I was like, damn, this is dope.

Okay, should I get high? So I think my first plan of action is this is one of the first baby bongs I ever bought myself. It was after a breakup and I no longer had my weed plug anymore because, you know, not only was I dating him for his money, but I was dating him for his weed connect. lost all of that and so I was like you know what I'm going through a breakup this is hard I'm gonna go buy myself a baby bong so I can get high as fuck and just make myself feel better and get through this depression with my little friend so I have my baby bong. I filmed up, filled it up with water and I have this fume. Okay. So I'm going to put this in my grinder for anyone that has never smoked weed, put it in your grinder. We're going to grind it up. Oh man. I used to have this like baby little grinder that I would

keep in my purse everywhere. And I remember when I went to my first therapy session in New York at the time, fully, so illegal. And I dropped my purse and my little baby bowl, like this size, literally tiny baby bowl. And my grinder fell out. It was my, literally my first session with my therapist. And she was like, all right, let's get into this I'm like fuck okay okay so we have weed I'm gonna pack this bong guys I don't really usually smoke out of bowls or bongs I prefer right now in my life, edibles and joints. Okay, look at these cute little lighters I got. It says 420 on it.

Very cute, very festive. Also, while I'm doing this, can you guys also make sure that you're lighting up with me and I don't care what you're smoking out of, let's go. Okay, Okay. Let's go, baby. 420. Oh, fuck. Dude, I have not hit a bong New York in my last apartment with Lauren and we would sit outside of the window and smoke it together and that was when Lauren was going through her breakup I was going through my divorce for the show and we would just get high every fucking night and just be like come on let's just hit it together that's the best when you fucking smoke with a girlfriend and you're both just going through it you're like let's just

fucking drown our sorrows in this fucking shit you just get high as fuck okay i forgot guys this little piece fucking slaps i had nothing to eat today so i'm gonna get high as fuck and that was probably the point and i got a lot of um food for myself, but okay, let's, let's pace ourselves, Alex. Okay. You've lasted for so long with me. You've gotten me through so much. Isn't it so crazy? I'm sure anyone that not even talking to my microphone.

Isn't it crazy? Anyone that smokes you have like your pieces that you're so invested in like this is a new bowl that I like don't give a fuck about this little baby has gotten me through everything I can already feel myself entering my my happy place I'm relaxed and I'm just happy it's 420. Now let's do a little ASMR. Sometimes when I'm high watching the, it's not even animal planet. It's like going on YouTube and finding the underwater world. That's called the ocean. That is called the ocean just so you know, but watching like the whales

and the creatures in the ocean. I love watching those kinds of videos not that anyone asked I just wanted to let you guys know that that's something I personally enjoy indulging in when I'm high all right let's keep it going oh man this is so cute guys this be loved? I feel like it's easier to be loved, right? Well, you know what? I guess maybe people that like don't feel worthy of love, it may be impossible. Actually, I take take that back that's actually just a question of like where you're at with yourself I personally am in a place in my life where I feel very comfortable and easy being loved because I love myself but I think that maybe in the past at points in my life I didn't feel worthy of love because I felt like a piece of

shit with shit in my life. So I think that makes sense, right? Like it's easy to be loved when you love yourself. People maybe that don't feel worthy could potentially see, like be paranoid, like, oh, they have ulterior motives. Why would they love I'm not worthy but if you love yourself you're like yeah I'm fucking dope as shit of course I fucking am worthy of love and I think it's easier to give love so I would say but I do think it's easier so maybe it's is the world more in a place where we all feel not great about ourselves, I feel like that's a majority of a lot of people in the world, like not feeling happy with who they are. And so maybe if I actually get deeper with it, maybe it is easier to love because you're in control of that decision.

Where to be loved takes vulnerability, more vulnerability, because it also is contingent truly upon someone else. Whoa, was that profound or was that the dumbest thing I ever said? I don't know. But I think I said that right. Maybe when I listen back, I won't. But I think that was clear. Does that make sense? Okay. Is there one soulmate for every person in the world? no, absolutely not. The amount that you change in your life, like you quite literally can't say there's only one soulmate because if I met someone at 16, the man that I was in love with at six, let's call him a boy, the boy that I was in love with at 16 at the time was my soulmate. Like I'm obsessed now, love you Dylan, but not so much. So I think it's

like now my version of what would make in my mind a soulmate is so different than five years ago, 10 years ago, 20 years ago. So no, every different version of yourself can find a soulmate how about that but I don't think there's just one soulmate for everyone now is fame ultimately good or bad I'm not even gonna I think I think it's both depending on how you view it and use it I think fame is good if the person with the fame works to use that power in order to like enact change in the world. I think fame is bad, especially with social media. Like there are people that we see with fame that are acting in a way that could negatively affect like a young kid's perception of how they should be and what they aspire to be and what they look up to.

I personally would not consider myself famous, but if you have, there's a different now new level in the past few years of like, but do you have you have some influence sure I definitely feel like I have some influence I feel like in the past two years I've tried to really do what I just said I think is good which is like try to inspire try to enact like positive change try to be a good influence I hope people feel I've I think you can almost like see the change even in my career. The turning point for me was when I feel like I had just a lot of differing opinions than what I was putting out on the internet. Cause like as someone that's just like putting out a show, the beginning of the show felt so good. So I think in that moment, I would have said I thought I was doing good.

I thought I truly was like empowering women. Then I think because, like I said, you can change and you find a difference. Things fucking change. Then my perspective of what I was doing changed. I was like, I kind of don't agree with younger Alex, which I'm sure a lot of us look back at our younger selves and you're like I was an idiot so then I think that was a turning point where I started to keep saying shit that I used to say and I was like I don't even agree with myself anymore and then when I

started to be like well what do I think and what do I agree with then for myself and that's when I think just I started to say my own shit also just taking over a show and being solo you don't have someone to like have opinions with that then we formed one opinion together and would do the show for me having the show alone I'm kind of like it's my name on it so I better fucking agree with it yeah so I think as I've gained confidence, I now feel like I'm able to make more definitive decisions because I know more who I am now. So I think, yeah, I don't even fucking remember what the question was and I'm feeling great. I hope I'm speaking words of wisdom but that felt right I feel like I said something right there and like I just came out of the woodwork and I was like you know what

let me tell you the meaning of life and all of a sudden it hit let's go make a quesadilla Hello. I feel like I'm on a spelling bee. Hello. Welcome to Cooking High with Alex Cooper. Q-U-E-S-A-D-I-L-L-A. Quesadilla. Before I make my quesadilla, I want to give you a little update on where I'm mentally at. And I hope you also are mentally where I'm at. I'm pretty up there. So I'm going to take another bong rip before, but I'm definitely entering munchy territory. And oh, that's why I spelled quesadilla, because I want to have a quesadilla. But first, let's get a little even more high holy fuck okay

i'm gonna take you guys through one of my favorite, favorite high treats, a quesadilla. And I would never order a quesadilla off of Postmates, Uber Eats, Caviar, DoorDash, Seamless, none of the above. When you order a quesadilla from somewhere, it's disgusting. It's not hot anymore. It's thick as thieves. I don't need to explain to you why I want to eat a quesadilla. Okay. I'm like justifying. I'm like, I promise you the quesadilla is going to be great. So let me show you what I use. Step one, I'm going to kill my assistant because these are too small. I would prefer larger quesadillas. This is for a child, but we're going to then make two. These are our essentials. Ready? We we need a pan we need a little

butter or olive oil we need the four mexican cheese lusciousness we need this and we need i said a pan oh and ranch dressing and salsa because i don't know if i'm gonna be in the mood for ranch or salsa it's a game game time decision. Whatever calls out to me. So I need to find a pan. Also, disclaimer, this is my work office. So I'm hoping I have a pan. I've also never cooked on this stove. And so this is going to be a lot of firsts for us.

Let's play a game. Where do we, let me get two guesses where I think the pan would be. I'm going to try here first. Oh my God. This is not rigged. This is not rigged. I promise you there is a fucking pan in here. And I did not check this prior. Okay. A pan. So I'm going to pull out two tortillas and see if they perfectly match. Let me go get some cheese. I'll be right back. Located olive oil, ranch, salsa, cheese. We're going to lather this shit up.

It's important that you stack that shit thick. So I'm trying to like edge it out here. I don't know if you guys can see. Okay, I need to get a spatula. And now we're going to begin. We'll try another one. Is that the same one? Hold on. hold on dude this thing is something is happening with this one ready watch this okay i'm holding the button we are not it's cooking it's not easy what if i try to switch

my fingers because i'm to need to flip it. Okay. If I take my hand off this button, we all die. No. If I take my hand off this button, it's going to stop. So I could technically Google how to do this, but guys, this is more fun. Working for something is 10 times better than getting it easy in life. Okay. I'm having a hard time right now.

I'm having a hard time. I would really love to be able to see the bottom of my quesadilla. Okay. So what's going to happen is in a couple seconds, I'm going to let go with my left hand. Unless I could do this. I think I need two hands to flip this baby. The cheese is melting. Why did I just have an accent? The cheese is melting. I'm having to be really mindful right now. I think it's time to flip. I think it's time to flip and I'm going to have to do this again. Fuck. Oh my god. Oh. Oh fuck. Now here we go. Now I have to hold it down again. Motherfucking shit.

So how are you guys? Like what's going on? How do people do these cooking shows? I quite literally would be like, I like barely can keep in mind that I'm supposed to be podcasting. I remember I used to watch Emerald growing up with my dad. Emerald, Emerald. There's definitely no D. Emerald, Emerald, Emerald. Five, four, three, two, one. Bam! Looks great.

Now I'm going to cut it. I like to cut it into squares or triangles I'm waiting for it to cool I'm getting a little insecure Because when you start eating I feel like in a podcast it sounds bad So i'm getting a little insecure. So i'm gonna take my popcorn and slide to the right a little bit Okay This will be good

Look how good this cheese like melt is ow okay so now we're going to put a little ranch a little salsa so let's try this oh salsa. So let's try this. Oh, oh, that's good. That's really good. Brings me back to home, you know? Um, okay. So I just finished that entire quesadilla. I found myself really veering more towards the salsa today. What other treats we got over here? My assistant got me powdered donuts. I can feel myself on that part of my high where, like, I'm, like, really relaxed. I am, like, wanting to, like like sink into the couch after I just ate so I think we should go back on the couch I'm gonna bring a snack let's talk a little bit more

I'm not gonna clean any of this up let's just let's just go so I chose to bring over the powder donuts and I didn't even see these I can't believe I didn't geek over them the Spongebob Squarepants gummies why is everything Spongebob Squarepants better the Spongebob Squarepants mac and cheese is better than just like normal shaped mac and cheese like see Spongebob's face going into my mouth is that a gross sexual joke so I have now taken many bong rips smoked a little baby jay and as you probably have been seeing come in and off this table because it keeps getting in my camera angle is this water bong looking situation I have no idea what this is called. I don't even know where it came from on, to be honest. I think this goes with it.

Now I have no idea how to make it work. So let's try. Okay. So I'm going to grind up more weed into my little baby grinder guys this is fun you guys realize I have never gotten high on an episode of call her daddy although contrary to people thinking my eyes always look like I'm high I have never done an episode of call her daddy high although I have been drinking a lot lately. I think this is gonna go in here. It looks like a sippy cup. Okay, let's try this. Mom, dad, daddy gang, I love you. I'm like literally gonna blow my face off like what?

Fuck. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. oh my god that is incredible but I was not ready for that experience holy fuck I'm gonna be high out of my fucking mind should I take another hit I mean we're in this, right? Okay. Okay. Dude, this is insane. This is, this is, any water?

Oh my God. Okay. Okay. any water oh my god okay this is my feeling about this this contraption is fucking incredible that is exactly you want six of your best friends if you have that many the idea would be to sit with your friends and it would be so incredible to be able to pass that thing around. That's definitely for like multi-purpose use, like, or multi-people, multi-people. Should I say it again? Multi-people. It's for multi-people use. Is that even a fucking word? For multiple people to use. It's for multiple people to use. Would I be a little like, okay, Alex, get your shit together if I did this by myself every night? I would be a little

concerned. But that was, that's like a different hit of high like I felt that way more than that baby bong okay wait I'm gonna sit on this couch I think I just sent myself into the paranoid zone so I'm gonna not think about that okay guys my favorite show to watch right now I don't really like like cowboy shit like I am not like a frequent Texas goer or anything of that nature I don't like like I mean I'm sure I'd wear cowboy boots if it went with like my outfit but like I'm not really like the southern thing I'm from the northeast like the whole thing I just went in so many different directions you could potentially politicize that but Yellowstone guys I am a fucking zest this woman in this show you guys should go watch it because it's basically succession but in Wyoming and the main like uh woman character is such a fucking boss and she's

like Bob like you think I'm gonna fuck you that easily I'm not gonna just fuck you I'm gonna fuck generations of your family I'm gonna fuck up your family so bad that when I fuck you I'll have fucked your grandkids and your grand and I was like like sorry I don't know if that made any sense but this woman talks so fucking nasty to men and I want to be here it's a really good show I was not paid to say any of this I just really like the show also I'm watching the ultimatum on Netflix new reality show go watch it because it's so fucking good I remember when I watched Nick Lachey and Jessica Simpson in newlyweds that may have been like the

first reality television show I like was obsessed with. But now that I think he and Vanessa seem really cute and I know they're hosting all of these Netflix shows and I would love for them to come on. That would be fun. Also, Nick Lachey is just like, it's funny that we're all still talking somehow about Nick Lachey. Good for him. I'm going to be really honest. I always forget who was on which team team um Nick Lachey what no NSYNC or Backstreet Boys I can never remember who was on which one wait let me guess Justin Timberlake was in NSYNC yes who the fuck was in the Backstreet Boys wait wasn't that the whole thing no one was really got famous the Backstreet Boys? Wait, wasn't that the whole thing? No one was really got famous. The Backstreet Boys name is huge, but like, was anyone in the Backstreet

Boys that is famous? It's like, but they, I'm pretty sure were so iconic. Like I think their music was more iconic, but then the people in NSYNC were cooler. Okay. Listen to me. I loved the Spice Girls because I feel like the Spice Girls just like, oh, they were so good. If you want to be my lover, you got to get with my friends. Okay. Please auto-tune that. Power to the world. Spice up your life, every boy and every girl. Spice up your life. If you're feeling sad and low. Okay, the point is, is I know the Spice Girls, guys, and I love them. If you want my future, forget my past. If you want to get with me, better make it last. don't go waste down my precious time get your act together and we'll be just fine hi i'm baby i'm scary raw i'm ginger god spice girls were great there's no one like that anymore it makes me feel sad music has changed so much like I feel like there used to be such iconic iconic girl

groups and like pop fun and now it's like pop like sad depressing emo and like of course I love listening to a sad song here and there but like I miss the like fun like we just want to have a good ass time I think that's why people are gravitating right now to Dua Lipa just because she's such like a, like fun. If anyone's out there wanting to make music, we need you to make happier music for me. Dua Lipa sings like that levitating song. Like, we're levitating or, oh, no, I know her songs. I just don't know. Like, know like um yeah the levitating fuck how does it go all I know is we're levitating um do do do no uh oh oh she has that one with Elton John that goes like um I cannot I cannot I will know one in a second um no shit Alex you're googling it levitating Dua Lipa I just need to hear it quickly and then I'll be able to sing it

you want me I want your baby my sugar, we're renegading, my milk away, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I got you, moonlight, starlight, my shine, I got you, all night, let's dance, come we'll levitate in what the fuck i can't believe i swear i love Dua Lipa and i just in this moment like please you are a queen you are a goddess i just blanked i think i may have gotten every other word wrong like i would if someone asked me would you bet your life that you got most of the lyrics right? No, you know, but I definitely was on, like I had the, the right idea of the word that went there. Maybe it wasn't that exact word, but it's not like I was that far off. Oh my God. Oh my God. Yes. You know, what's really sad about this is when you think a song lyric is something for so long you're sitting next to someone you're in the car you're on your way to a happy hour someone's bumping the tunes they all start singing this song you're singing it with them you go to sing

the word your friends say a different word than you and you hear it and you hear it different because it's, they're singing it right next to you, you know? And you're like, what did you just say? And they say, I'm singing, fuck off. And you say, no, wait, what, what was the word you said? If we got to go to, what did you say it is? And then they say the word that you for the past eight years of your life have been singing as something completely different. And you feel really embarrassed. It's almost like a really sad feeling because the song will never be the same.

Hold on. I feel really smart right now because I'm reading top 40 most misheard song lyrics. And number eight is Dancing Queen, Feel the Beat from the Tangerine. Who the fuck thought it was Tangerine? Dancing Queen, Feel the Beat. And okay, The real one is tambourine. I actually don't remember any of those lyrics. Dancing queen, feel the beat. Oh my God. Do you know what I thought it was? Wait, I think I'm having the moment where I'm realizing what I thought it was. I thought it was 17. Oh, feel the beat only 17. Okay. Wait, no, I'm not fully wrong. Hold me closer. Tiny dance that they they said people think it's hold me closer

Tony Danza it's gonna be me oh my god and in sync it's gonna be me I'm right I'm smart and other people that are dumb think it's it's gonna be me as in the season oh my god I feel so fucking smart right now. Give me another one. Month, what did I say? As I'm like bragging, I'm smart. Tweety, it's a month. It's hard and it's upsetting, frustrating.

I hope you guys had fun getting high with me. I will say this didn't feel like work. This felt like fun. And so I hope you guys also got fucking high or you were drinking if you aren't a smoker or you're masturbating whatever gets you off I hope you did it I had a great time spending a nice hour with you guys thank you daddy gang you know the drill I will see you fuckers next Wednesday Fuckers. Next Wednesday.