Call Her Daddy - Madelaine Petsch: PSA: You Can’t Fix Him

Episode Date: September 17, 2025

Join Alex in the studio for an interview with Madelaine Petsch. For the first time ever, Madelaine opens up about her childhood trauma, her complicated dynamic with her father, changing her mind on having children, and why she’s done being the fixer in relationships. Enjoy! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

What is up, Daddy, gang? It is your founding father, Alex Cooper, with Call Her Daddy. Madeline Petch, welcome to Call Her Daddy. Hi. You look so gorge. Thank you. So do you. How did you pick this outfit today?

Well, I thought, if I'm going on Call Her Daddy, I want Alex to call me, Daddy. So I'm going to have my titties out. No, no, no. It's perfection. I feel like you have had literally the. craziest year. You've been on an insane filming schedule. Do you have any time off or are you getting back into something? This is like the worst time to ask me this question. I had one day off for the next two months and they just put something on it. So I'm feeling a little overwhelmed currently.

I'm somebody who like, this is the thing about my job that I was not made for me is I don't do well with change in my schedule. And it changes constantly. You literally being an actress and you're like, I don't like change. I'm like literally every five fucking months. You're like new project, new project. I'm fine with. But I was just shooting a movie. in Tulsa, which I adored. And they kept changing and adding days. And I was like, my brain can't function like this. Oh, my God. You need a full set schedule. I read in an interview you did that you said you basically have like a very, very hard time ever relaxing. Like you're not someone that can relax. Have you gotten better? I have actually. The pandemic, honestly, like weirdly forced me to

find stillness and be okay with it. Because I couldn't work. I was stuck in my house. And I was like, I have to find a way to manage this. I did actually, by the way, get my brain scanned during the pandemic because I was so anxious all the time that I was like there's something genuinely wrong with me. That's how bad I am with stillness. And then I was like, okay, no, this is actually, I'm actually just a crazy person because I'm fine. You mean, well, he's like, it looks gorgeous. You're like, everything looks great. I'm like, there's a gremlin living in my head. You don't see it. Okay, but to be fair, I feel like so many of us during the pandemic were like that where you were like, there is something wrong with me. Yeah. Okay, October is coming up.

Oh. I feel like you, Cammy and Lily have been known in the past to do these really, really good Halloween costumes, are you going to do anything this year? I don't think we are. I'm so sorry. I try every year. I want to let you know. I am the one who rallies everybody. I'm the one in the group chat who's like, okay, it's August. What are we doing? What's the plan? And this year, I think we are all filming in different places. And there's just no, I even said, what if we just do a photo shoot? But we're all so busy. Like, it's not even possible. How do you feel, though, about so many celebrities doing that? Where half the time they don't even go to the party in the costume, they just do the photo shoot and put it on Instagram. How do we feel? I don't even care,

honestly because I don't even like the party. I like the dressing up and I don't even want to go. It's actually true. Like being a girl is like loving the getting ready process. And then you get to the party and you're like, can we go home and eat pizza and like hang out? Even like press days. I'm like, I'm so excited for press days. And then after glam's over, I'm like, wait, I still have to go do stuff. Right. You just want to like look cute. And then you're like, wait, I now actually just want to like sit here, take some selfies and then wash it all off and get in bed and watch a movie. Actually fair. Okay. So no Halloween this year. But will you do something for a costume? I can't. I can't not do something for a Halloween. But also I am so excited, Alex. Six Flags is. doing a stranger's maze and they have little me's running around in there. And when I tell you top 10 most important things to my entire life existence is having a haunted house with me running around in it that I can go and attend, life is made. Wait, wait, wait. I can die happy. Wait, wait, wait. Little you. Little me's, like me's. People with little wigs on running around as if they're me. Maya and the strangers. A dream. Are you going to go? Absolutely. I go on the 11th.

I am like such a scaredy cat. So like I would probably be like, I want to go and then I'd be so fucking scared. I feel like you're going to thrive. You don't go to Universal Horn Nights or anything. I just get really scared. I'm such a bitch. You're so fun. Are you crazy? I'm such a bitch. I thrive. September 1st. I'm like, I have my fireplace on. No, Madeline. I was like, 75 degrees in my house. Okay. Yes, to that. But me, I literally was like, I was getting scared of Halloween town. Like, I would get scared of like the guy. What, Calabar? You were scared of Calabar running around. Like. Actually, yes. When he was like, yeah. No, honestly, he was a little scary. But that also came out when we were young. Let's be on. Okay, fair. We're going to play a little quick game. Okay. It's called firsts and worsts. I'm going to give you a scenario and you're going to tell me the story behind it. Sure. Okay. What was the worst fashion phase that you ever went through in your life? Oh. Oh my God. I had like a full scene kid phase. Okay. Talk to me. I actually have gauge holes in my ears that I have to like wear stickers in the back of my ears to wear earrings. I had double zero gauges. Wait, what are double zero gauges. I don't even know what the sizing is, but my brother was gauging his ears.

and he didn't want to go too big. And so he did it on me first. I'm the younger sister to see what the size would look like. Now he has massive ear holes. I love how he's like, hold on, come over here. Boom. He was like, you have to put Vaseline in and you have to like stretch it.

It's such a crazy process. I did it when I was in like seventh grade. That would be the worst, I think. Yeah. I like thought I was like in my like senior email phase. I never had gauges, but I did have the like the colored skinny jeans. Oh. Oh.

That was a right of passage though. I honestly think. I look back in pictures though and you're like. Thank God. I deleted my MySpace, all of that stuff, like long before I became an adult. Oh, no, you have to. I don't even have those photos. And I want them to be dead forever.

It's blackmail of yourself that you put out there willingly. Why did I do this to my? The side bang. No. The way that I bought like thinning shears and thinned my own hair, so I had like very thin hair. Why do that? And now we all want thick hair. Yeah, I know.

Horrible. Okay. What is the story of your first kiss? My first kiss. Oh, honestly, I have a really weirdly. terrible memory when it comes to my personal life. Maybe that's childhood trauma. But the one that I think of is my brother specifically said, like, there's this one guy who goes to the school that I hate more than anybody. And you cannot talk to him at this game. And I was like, you got it. Love you so much.

And then I saw him. And I was like, ah, he's kind of hot. What do I do? And then I'm pretty sure he became my boy, my first boyfriend for like six months. And my mom would like drive us around in our minivan. I think I kissed him in the back of the minivan when my mom was driving. this is so telling of like who you are like I needed this information I'm like wait a second I was my brother's like villain as a child you know what we would have been best fucking friends hell yeah because I am a natural redhead what yes wait wait oh my god what yes why are you I know I know it was like oh what I know I know I need pictures after this is over but you look way but you look way actually I think you look so cute with red hair no no maybe now that

I've like grown into my face but not back then but I was always like wanting to hook up with my brother's friends and like they didn't really want to hook up with me what about enemies brother's enemies that see that's what I'm getting to I did hook up with one of his enemies loved that for you and he became my first boyfriend he were the same person shout out you know who you are like it was and I loved it I wonder where that guy is I know well I think I know where he is but okay um that doesn't matter the problem was though that like my brother got so upset with me but it only made me want to love this kid more my brother didn't get mad at all he's the best he was like I mean, if you like him, like, all good.

Oh, my God, wait. You had such a better experience with your brother. My brother came in and would, like, throw shit in my room and be like, you have to stop seeing him. And I was like, honestly, the day that you get bored of me seeing him, I'll probably dump him. But the fact that you're in rage. Honestly, it was a CW show. Okay. It was like one tree hill.

Okay, next. What was the most random job that you worked before your big break as an actress? I know you had a couple jobs. I had a lot. I was a window salesman. Talk to me about that. So I was on Craigslist, and I was like, what's the highest paying job I can find? And by the way, I was getting jobs on Craigslist.

I absolutely could have been murdered. I was such an idiot when I moved here. No, Madeline. And it was in Redondo Beach. And they were like, you go door to door and you sell windows to people. And I was like, bet. So I went and it wasn't working. And so I started waiting outside the houses until the wives would leave.

And then I'd go to the door and make myself cry and get the husbands to buy windows. And then I had a really high return rate was the problem. because they didn't actually want the windows. They was trying to get the girl who's crying on the doorstep to leave. What if fascinating sales tactic? It was interesting. I don't think it was beneficial to anybody. Selling windows, picturing you coming up with a reason these people need to buy fucking windows.

And crying. Okay, but you were savvy. I was doing my best with what I had to do. You were doing your best. Yeah. Okay, what was your first, like, big, big purchase once you got your paycheck from Riverdale? You know, I actually, every season that we got picked up, I bought myself on you, Cartier Ring. So I have, like, I have seven Cartier rings for the seven seasons of the show that I literally never wear.

Yeah, wait, I was like, I don't wear them. But I have them and I like looking at them. They're somewhere. They're somewhere. Wait, do you ever wear them? Yeah, sometimes. I actually think I may have lost one, which was a real, it was a real bummer in a move. Okay, what was the worst Riverdale plot line you ever had to act out? Where do I begin? Okay. Give me a strong one. Okay. Okay. So it's like, there's so many going through my head, I can't decide. I had to act with my brother's dead corpse in a wheelchair for an entire season. Mind you,

he died four years prior. His corpse should have absolutely rotted. But I was like basically losing my mind and speaking to a corpse for an entire season. I would wake up and be like, JJ, do you want your tea? See, I like definitely like watched the first couple of seasons and then when it was getting really crazy. Probably around that time. Yeah, yeah. That's probably actually, yeah. Actually, can I change the answer? My actual answer is this is my, this is my Roman Empire. okay when I became a witch on that show Roberto is this my camera

Roberto when I think he was watching that show there was one thing I told you I said I never want to see lasers coming out of my hands okay what did he do in the season finale of season six I'm like scarlet witching up in the air singing and crying with with lasers shooting out of my hands at a comet at a comet that ends up wiping out Oliverdale

which is why we're in the 50s in season seven hey what that'll do it and because you had the visual of like I really don't want this to be me. No, and I actually think I might have given him the idea is the problem. I think I said, like, just please, no lasers. Like, I'll do anything witchy. It's fun. But no lasers. And then he was like, finale. I think she said she wanted lasers out of her hands. And you're like, God damn it. This will literally follow me for the rest of my life. Oh, my, I see it every day.

The meme of me like crying and screaming and like, I just, okay, but people loved it. It's, look, it was fun. It was always, it was always a good time for me on set. I know today, you kind of talk about some things that you've never publicly spoken about. Yeah. Why do you think you are finally ready to open up about your childhood? I think for a long time I struggled with the idea of, is it? Is it my story to share? I mean, it involved a lot of other people, my whole family. And I think I got to a place through therapy and talking to my friends.

And also just I think about when I was a kid, if there was somebody that I loved, just like one person saw this. If somebody that I loved was talking about what they went through and it was even remotely similar to what I was going through, it would encourage me to continue. So I think it's just kind of an amalgamation of that and then finding the right platform and feeling comfortable with you to do that. okay let's do it okay let's do it girl here we go um okay let's go back growing up just like very beginning days what was your family like honestly they're the strangest people on the planet

but i adore them um my parents are south african so they don't really they're not they don't understand american culture very well and they were raising two american children in a small town i have a wonderful older brother and um a mom who is like do you know people who are destined to be mothers. Like, that's my mom's entire purpose on this planet. And a dad who tried his very best. And you know that he was trying his best, but as a kid, I didn't really understand, like, the way he was behaving and treating me wasn't because of me, if that makes sense. When you say that you guys were different because your parents were South African, where were you raised also? Washington State. Washington. Okay. Were you, were people

outwardly like commenting on you guys? Like did you stick out like a sort of thumb or was it just like in your head you felt different? I think also being a redhead and South African and being raised plant based and without Christianity in my life, it felt like everything that were the core values of being a child, which is like looking normal, having a normal C in religion and food eating, we didn't have. And so it felt more like maybe it was all in my head, but I definitely felt like I didn't belong growing up. So talk to me growing up about your relationship with your mom and your relationship with your dad and like your early memories of those relationships forming. Yeah, my mom is like the protector. My mom always was trying to keep the peace. Her words

were peace and tranquility. And so she did, she did her absolute best to not let me see the trickling effects of my father's behavior. My relationship with my father was really complicated because he has behavioral issues. And he would have extreme highs and extreme lows. And in the extreme highs, as a child, it's like you have the most fun dad in the world. It's like you can't, you can't live and breathe about that person being around. And then that person is ripped away from you and being cold to you and not responding when you tell them that you love them and and getting angry at you and lashing out for no reason, and you think it's your fault as a child.

Do you remember, like, an early core memory of, like, the first time you realized, like, maybe your dad was struggling with mental illness? When I was eight, my brother and my mother went South Africa, and my dad, and I had some sort of falling out over something, I don't even know what it was. And I told him, I loved him. I was, like, crying telling him I loved him.

I wanted him to tell me he loved him. back and he told me he didn't love me and he left and so you were alone in the house for a couple hours not for very long and I was just crying in bed the whole time but I remember sitting there and being like my father doesn't love me like I did something very wrong and I was calling my mom and they're on a different time zone and that was the first time she was like this has nothing to do with you this is fully your dad and that's when I really first understood that I think it took a long time and a lot of therapy because we don't use diagnoses in the household either. So it took a lot of therapy for me to figure out all was actually going on.

How was that explained to you that like we don't use? It wasn't. In fact, most of the time it was like it's PTSD because my dad was in the apartheid war or it's it's trauma or it's just he's having a bad mood. And it's like that's actually not what's happening. He has a chemical imbalance in his brain. brain that makes him incredibly high and incredibly low. And it took a lot of therapy for me to feel the validation of a diagnosis, even if he has now gotten one, but even if he never got one

to understand what was actually going on. And it was frustrating because you're like, why do you not want to know? It will help understand and educate us on what's happening so it's not his fault either. Do you know what I mean? He's not trying to be like that. Right. I also think like our parents' generation just doesn't really understand mental health, and I think it wasn't a priority. Whereas now, as we become parents, like, of course it's a priority. But back then, it really just felt like that wasn't even an option. So when you were dealing with difficult moments with your father, like how would your family talk about it? There's a lot of triangulation, which is something I learned in therapy with my mom and my brother and I kind of having little kikis in my brother's room while one of us is crying because he's done something to them. Always verbal, never anything physical, thankfully. And usually the issue was I became this, like, key to unlocking his good mood. So when there was bad things going on in the house, I would be called to come and fix the problem. So no matter what the issue was, if he was upset with my mother or my brother, I would be sent in to essentially disarm him emotionally.

Why do you think that was? He kind of has all, he just has this, like, I think a lot of men, like their little girls, the apple of their eye and I think I think I was the apple of his eye so I think it allowed him to like I'd walk in and most of the time it would work and I'd be like daddy can we can we just have a nice night can we just figure it out and it would take him a couple of hours but sometimes it would work so I think they kept doing that which is at first I'm sure before you were like able to process what was happening everyone's like anything to get him to like come down and be in a better mood but then as you started to get a little bit older into like high school, were you, how much was that

affecting you kind of being the person that had to be almost like the parental figure in your household? Yeah, I remember one night I was out and I won't detail what was happening at my house because it's incredibly personal, but I was out at a ballet and I got a call saying you have to come home immediately. I had like 16 missed calls and I had to come home and deal with a situation that was so incredibly unsafe and so disrespectful as a child to put me in. that I have a lot of, I had a lot of resentment towards everyone in my family for putting me in that position when they could have just gone to professionals and dealt with it properly. How did you process any of this? I didn't. In fact, it became almost like this

compartmentalization where a lot of the time now we'll talk about things that happened, the three of us, my brother and my mom and I, and we'll be like, wait, that's not what happened or that didn't happen because it was just push it out of your head. Don't think about it. This is just the reality. You don't know anything different. So when you look back on that time of your life, do you now have emotions that come up? Or is it still kind of like it's more survival mode? I've worked through it so much in therapy. Like my first six years of therapy were all about my relationship with my father and my parents and my childhood to the point where now, like, I don't necessarily feel emotional about it. I've worked through all of that. But there are still

moments where I have to put that hat on and show up in that way. Being in a situation as a child where you feel like you have to become the parent has so many repercussions, obviously, when you get older. But what was going on when you were kind of handling things with your father? Like, what was going on with your mother in those moments? God, Alex, I don't even remember. I really don't remember. I think, like, honestly, I don't think she ever asked me to do that.

I think I immediately saw a place that I could. try to help, and I just tried to help every time I could. In, like, high school or anything, did you ever confront your parents? I didn't confront my parents until I moved out, but I moved out the day I could when I was 18. And I also, like, immersed myself in after-school activities. Like, I was, that's probably why I am successful, honestly, is because I did not want to be at home. So I did dance from, I went to an arts high school that was 45 minutes away. I did dance from three to nine every single night. Afterwards, when home, did homework, went to bed. And then on weekends, I did plays in my local theater.

Like, I just, I never wanted to be home. So I immersed myself in the arts and escapism. And now I'm here. So it's like, would I still be in this position if I didn't have that? I don't know. That's what I was wondering, because I'm like all these inconsistencies at home, like, how did it affect your life socially? Like, did your friends know what was going on?

Yeah, for sure. Did you have any issues growing up with, like, could you have friends over your house? My mom was so, such a little soldier on. honestly, because she always fought for me to have the most normal childhood she possibly could give me. So I had friends over often, but the friends I was comfortable having over were friends that already knew what was going on. But it also affected their childhood. Like, my childhood best friend is still one of my closest friends now. And she has horror stories about being at my parents' house. Would you and your brother lean on each other a lot?

Or was it tough to kind of? Well, it became really awkward because it's like I'm the one that's going in to fix a situation. What is, I can't even imagine. We've never spoken about. this, but I can't even imagine what it must have made him feel like to know that I could go in and make my dad feel better. That created a really weird, unhealthy dynamic between him and I, where when I moved out, like, we weren't super close. We've become close in our adult years now, and we've worked really hard to get there. But it didn't, we didn't have each other to lean on, really. Talk to me a little bit more about the resentment aspect, because you go through this in your childhood, your home is going through these, like, instability moments. You are

parentified at a young age, you're throwing yourself into the arts, trying to get away. In the moment, were you resentful? Or did it take you leaving to become resentful? Honestly, the only resent that I feel is seeing now how it seemingly seems so easy for him to be normal. That's the hardest part. Because now he's actually pretty wonderful, dad. Do you think there's a chance that's because you now can have distance and, like, leave and remove yourself from it? Absolutely. Like, if you were living in a house. else with him maybe. Potentially. I mean, my mom still loves with him. They're still together. And so it does seem like he's found things that work for him in that regard. But to see how

easy it was for him to do that was a tough pill for me to swallow. But I'm incredibly honest with him now. I've not told him I'm going on this and I'm very curious to see how that goes. But I'm very honest with him about his behavior now and about how it affected me as a child. And he takes it on the chin very well. Okay, let's talk about therapy. You've been in therapy for a couple years now. I remember the same therapist for nine years. I'm obsessed with her. Wait, nine years is like... It's my longest relationship. Oh my God. We, and you are like stronger than ever.

Because I can't figure out if like you need to switch therapists at a certain point after like how many years. You feel good. I'm locked in. It's for life. Oh, I love that for you so much. I'm a lifer. What was it that made you want to initially get into therapy nine years ago? My relationship that I was in, my romantic relationship, was echoing very similar things that was happening with my father.

It's so interesting because so many of my friends and I always talk about this, like, when you become an adult, you're like, oh my God, I have to get in because of this guy that I'm seeing. And little do we know. And it unlocks everything. And meanwhile, I have nothing to do with fucking Brad or Brad or. Ben or whoever the fuck we're talking about. It's fully childhood shit. But it ignites something in you and it brings up so much past trauma that you're like, wait, what is this? Why am I acting this way? And then you sit down in a therapist's room and they're like, sweetie, I'm going to hold your hand when I say this. Let's put him over here. This is nothing to do with him. This is all you.

And you're like, so you get into therapy. Yeah. How did you start to initially feel when you started to work through? I remember I had a 15 minute. I was on set for Riverdale. in my trailer, season one, and I had a 15, or season two, and I had a 15 minute call with her. And I was sobbing. In 15 minutes, I was like broken down, all my makeup was off. And I was like, this is obviously what I need to be doing. And so, Rfordale was so wonderful. They would, like, help me find time in my schedule to do therapy.

And they were really supportive. But it was just through talking about it. I mean, my relationship was obviously not great if it was echoing that. So the kind of impetus was dealing with that at first for a long time. Yes. breaking yourself out of that and then getting into the weeds with your childhood stuff. When you went back to the childhood stuff, like what did you find was the hardest stuff to start to unpack with a therapist?

Because therapists ask pretty like pointed questions or they like ask you to go places that you sometimes don't want, not you don't want to go, but you're like, oh God, this memory just came up. Like I can't believe this. I think it was struggling with understanding that he didn't not love me. I think there was still this like idea in your head when you're a kid that it's like so deeply ingrained with you that this person can't possibly care about me and love me if they're treating me this way. And I thought I'd worked through that. I thought as an adult I understood that. But there was still that like little Madeline inside that was like my daddy doesn't love me. You know. And so like working through that it still comes up occasionally at 31, nine years later. But I think that was the hardest. The hardest thing was to really truly at a cellular level believe and understand that this has nothing to do with love or how much he cares about me. It has to do with. fully him in a chemical imbalance. What was it like when you started to have such success?

Like, were your parents... It was honestly kind of annoying. Yeah. Because it's like with my dad because he was so proud of me. And I'm like, ah, like, I just want to choke you. What's wrong with you? No, and he's so proud of me. And he's so excited.

And so then it was complicated because I'm also like... I financially support a lot of my family as well. so it became like no one asked me to I wanted to help but it started feeling weird you know like it's it's weird to have a childhood dynamic like that and then to be successful like this and then have the ability to monetarily help and it just becomes really messy in my head and so I had to like again compartmentalize and just figure it out well and because madeline it's like you used to be this parental figure in your house that's it you ran away because you didn't want to do it anymore, then you get success and you go back to that role. And even

though they didn't ask you, you know. It's just natural to me. Right. It's just natural to me. I just stepped back into it. I bought a house in Washington that I moved my brother into so he could get out of the house. He's still there. He loves it. And he's so happy in it. And it makes me so happy. But that's the kind of stuff I was doing when I got to, I bought that before. I bought my own house. So there's like this caretaker role that you're constantly in. Yeah. But then eventually as in therapy, you're like, we, I also have to take care of myself, not everyone around me. Can you talk to me about like one of the biggest breakthroughs that you ever had in therapy, if any? Yeah.

Not dating carbon copies of my father over and over and over again. And even if I tell, I'm like, this is not that. This is not that. This is so not that. This is why it always was that. It was always that. So I have to say I feel at the place of my life now, like I could not be further from that, which is like the biggest, the biggest success of my life, honestly. That's so fucking real where you're like convincing everyone. You're like, no, no, no, guys, this is so different.

No, I promise you it's different. And also here's why. And I know I told you last week he did this thing that's exactly like the other thing I told you about, but it's not that. It's not that. You're not talking to you that I'm standing on business. Okay. And your friends are literally like, okay, calls tomorrow. And then literally you're crying. I'm crying again. I'm like, mother fucking shit. Yeah. I feel like a lot of what you're talking about is like the steps that it took to get to this place. But like getting under it a little bit more emotionally.

Jump in. When you look back, how did the responsibility of managing your dad's emotions your entire life ultimately impact you and your fundamental core and who you became? as a human being. I remember in therapy once I said I'm happiest when I'm somebody else. I'm an actor. And I think that's how. I think like I had to really, I spent a lot of my life not loving myself because I was like if the person who made me doesn't love me, how the fuck am I supposed to love myself?

And there are still moments where that, it's not even like a conscious thought, but it's this almost like deep rooted, layered, sewn into the fabric of who I am, like insecurity of like, so it really is like to your point of what we were talking about earlier, taking a break and finding stillness is so important to me because it's moments where I can be like, I love myself and I love who I am, even though right now I'm telling you, I'm a fucking badass. I love myself more than anyone could possibly love me in the planet. I still have moments where I'm that little Madeline who's like sitting in her bad crying because she thinks her dad doesn't of her. I think for so many people that experienced extreme dysfunction in their childhood,

there is this like want to just keep going and like keep, whether it's succeeding or whatever it be, like keep moving so you don't have to really be still and be like, hey, so like how are we feeling about the past like 20 something years of our life? What do we feel about that? And when you do, sometimes it's really fucking difficult to get into therapy because I've had friends where they were like, I have to put a pause. Like this is literally like, I can't go to work. Like, I am like a mess right now because I'm remembering things. Like I have some friends that forgot about certain memories. Like it is a journey. But once you get over that hump, it really does bring you to a better place. Yeah. But it's not fucking easy. You talking about the men in your

life. Talk to me about how your relationship with your father, like actually give me some examples of how it affected the type of men that you were going for. Oh, well, here's one. After me and one of my exes broke up, he came out with the same diagnosis as my father. Okay. Right. So let's all take a break for a second on that one. And you in the moment didn't feel like... Did I feel like that?

It was my first love and it was so like all-encompassing. And I was like, this is my person. And that's the thing is I think watching my mom be with my dad and just decide to be with him forever, made me believe that love is actually just staying no matter what. Okay, let's pause and talk about that. Yeah. How many times have you and give me like some like things that have happened where you're like, I know I should leave, but I'm in love?

There was a moment in a relationship where I knew in my heart it was over. I stayed for a year and a half longer. I called all my friends. I was like, I know this is it. I know it's over. I called them. I told them what happened. They were like, yeah, obviously.

over. I save for another year and a half. Because I watched my mom stay forever. And it's funny because I have friends now who are like in relationships with their, they're parenting a child together and they're not happy. And I'm like, trust me, take it from somebody who grew up in a household where the parents were dysfunctional. It's actually better for your child to see real love. Go out and find your real love. Give them an example of what a proper relationship is meant to look like so that they don't seek that out when they're adults. It's a good point. It's almost like sometimes people understandably think like keeping the family together is really going to be better for everyone in the long run. And then you see people be like, please get a fucking divorce.

Like it actually will be better for all of us. And the parents are like, what? Wait. At the same time, though, I don't know if that would have been better. My parents also own a business together. So, like, I don't think it would have been the right thing. I think they did the right thing. But it did create a really unhealthy idea of what love was for me. I thought love was staying. How did you find yourself showing up in these dynamics? Like, I know these men were acting a specific way, but what were you like in your relationships in the past? Same shit I did with my dad.

There was conflict I was immediately fixing it to my detriment. I didn't really allow, like, I still have a hard time allowing conflict to stew. I think when there's unease or conflict, I get really uncomfortable for obvious reasons. And what do you do in those moments? Now? In the past. In the past, I would just scramble to fix it. Even if, like, they were the ones that fucked up.

You know, I'm really lucky. I haven't had many situations where someone's actually fucked up in a relationship. It's usually just like an argument or a disagreement that's gone south. But yeah, I would always scramble to fix it. Now I stand on business. Now she's quiet. Now she just sits. And everything in you is like, I'm rageful inside because I'm like, I have to fix it. I have to fix it. I'm like, it's okay. I'm just going to move my ankle and sit here and listen to you talk. And then I'm going to walk away, even though I don't want to walk away. I want to stay and fix it. And we'll talk about it tomorrow. that's okay but when you get in that cycle it's harder to break than to just keep doing it yeah okay so now talk to me about where you're at now through therapy of in the past you are going through these moments where you're like I'm becoming this fixer I'm doing the same thing that I did with my dad what are you like now you know I think I still have a bit of that in me but I also think that's just part of my personality so I'm trying to find the like navigate the what is me and what is like learned behavior and that's helpful through therapy. I think choosing partners was always tough for me. And I think now I'm really like I'm really locked into

what I want and who I am and what I deserve. In the past, what was something that would have attracted you to someone that now you would not? Loving me. Hey, you love me? Oh my God, so cool. I love me too. Let's do this. Like could be that simple sometimes. Hey, are you hot and you love me, like, let's go. And you're kind of funny. I'm in. You know what I mean? Like, it was like, I just didn't know what to look for because I didn't have something to look at. But I think, like, again, because there's so many women that listen to this, like, that is so unfortunately normal of like so many young women have this feeling of they're not loved in their childhood. And then they have this feeling of like taking anything that feels like

genuine love, but not actually. If it feels like security. Yeah. Consistency. Stability. Even though none of those things were usually true in the relationships, if it felt like security, I was in. Because if he's saying he loves you so much, but he also is like doing these things that are inconsistent. But he's saying he loves me. So you're going to hold on to that. Sometimes I used to, yeah. What is your relationship like now with your father? It's complicated. I love that man with every fiber of my being. He is one of the smartest people on the planet. He's also. like he loves gardening and he's like he makes little salads from his garden and he loves

his little greenhouse and he's I mean he's just like this sweet sweet man and when I'm able to step away from what happened and just look at the person in front of me I'm like you're an egg you're just this wonderful little creature but it's still complicated because I still hear what's happening at home and there are occasional issues and so I draw really firm boundaries there are times where I don't talk to him for six months or so and I'm very comfortable with that he wishes we spoke more. I'm doing what I can. But I love him a lot and I'm very thankful for him doing the work. What is your relationship like with your mom? Best friend. Best friend in the whole world. When I say like woman who was meant to be a mom,

I mean woman who was meant to be a mom. I think if anything, I feel sadness for her sometimes because I, she's so magnificent and so wonderful and so lovable. And I would just give anything. I would give my whole right foot for my mom to feel as loved as she deserves to feel. That would be my dream. I think, like, it obviously can be so difficult when you become an adult to kind of replay what happened in your childhood and look at your parents and realize they're not perfect. They hurt me. I, you know, I didn't have the best situation in moments. Can you talk to me about the types of conversations that you have had to have with your parents in order?

to move forward to where you're at now. Yeah. I had a lot. It was a lot of needing validation. It was a lot of needing. Like, this actually happened, right? And this is how it went down. And I did this and you said this or what happened.

Because my brother said this is what happened. So which one actually happened? And it was a lot of like actually trying to piece together my childhood and also saying these things to my father and having him acknowledge that's exactly what happened. That was the most important. piece to me to have a relationship now. What boundaries have you had to set in order to kind of have a healthier relationship with your father? You know, with actually both of my parents, they don't call me. I call them. That was really important to me. I was like, I'm tired of being

the one who gets the phone calls. I will call you when I have time to talk. Oh, that's a good boundary. And I ended up, I call my mom almost every day. And my dad, I call, I think we spoke on the phone like a week ago. I faced him like a week ago to say hi. Do you have any advice for people? Because I can imagine there's a lot of people watching being like, okay, wait, like this is so similar to things that I've gone through. Do you have any advice for people of how to approach difficult conversations with a parent? I don't know if I'm qualified to give advice, but I will say, depending on if you're still at home, if you're still at home, I think that you should probably manage those conversations very carefully to manage your environment so you're not continuously walking on eggshells.

But as an adult, honesty, and saying your truth. And if you need validation, go seek it out. And if they don't give it to you, cut them off. That's how I feel. If my dad wouldn't have given me validation of those moments, he wouldn't be in my life anymore. Overall, in your situation, when you look back on your childhood, like, is there anything you wished your family could have really done differently?

I wish I would have felt like a kid. Yeah. I think like now, like I do so much spiritual work. I'm incredibly spiritual. And when I do healing sessions with my healer, I go to Denver for like three days and we get really in the weeds. Every time what comes up is like, you just need to go play, go be a kid. And the coolest thing, Alex, is that my job is playing all day long. Like what a cool thing. I'm literally a big kid all day. Like I'm sitting here on a couch with jelly beans, like talking about my life, like doing whatever I want. I'm just like a little sim now. So I am like I think I am finding a way to hear. heal that inner Madeline through my work, which is the most beautiful thing I could do. Before we started recording, you had said that you had mentioned there was a time in your life

where you didn't think you wanted to have kids. And now you think you do. And no I do. Talk to me about that shift. All my axes are going to, if they hear of this, are going to be so fucking pissed off.

Because every man I've ever did is like, are we going to have kids or what? like, no, I don't want children. A lot of it was, there's like two sides to it. One was the societal pressure of being a woman of like, you are here to bear children. I'm like, go fuck yourself. No, I'm not. And also being a woman in Hollywood, and it's like, you only have so many years before your

prime is over. And if you use them on it. It's like, it's so much pressure that I was like, I'm just taking this off of the table for now. That was one side. The other side was much more deep rooted in I refuse to raise a child in a dysfunctional home. I refuse to raise a child where they believe that they are not loved. I never felt like that was possible because of what I saw as a child.

And then as an adult, something clicked, I want to say, eight months ago. This was like really recent. I was talking to my therapist. And I was like, I mean, if I could just have consistency, like, if I could have a kid with my best friend, I would love that. And she goes, hey, you can't. that's literally you can pick your partner you can have a kid with your best friend and it like mic drop you're like i was like wait what i can she goes yeah you can and then it's like i started thinking about it was like how fun would it be to be able to like i saw this ticot that made me almost just lose

my mind i wish i could show it to you of this adult mom showing a video of her daughter saying it's crazy to see how easily i could have been loved how easy it was to love a little me and it's like, knifes with heart, but also how cool would it be to like be able to give all the love I didn't feel and get to something little and to like all the things that I feel

all the other youth that I feel now like to see that through a child's eyes like it just feels so beautiful and so it was at one point the thing I wanted the least. I was like I don't want to carry on this bloodline. Let it end here. And now I'm like, no, I can change my narrative.

I can rewrite history and I can decide what this looks like and I have the power to do that. I think that's so beautiful and I also think it should be more normalized to go through that thought process of like it's okay that you changed your mind. Oh my God, now it's so annoying.

Everyone's like, are you sure you want them? You've been saying for years you don't. And it's like, hey, what if you were in my situation? Would you want them? Also, guess what? My ovaries, I can do whatever the fuck I want. I want them now. So shut the fuck up.

Do it is crazy. is crazy. Why is it that I don't get why people feel so much autonomy over women's bodies. Don't even get me started about politics. I'm not going to go there. No, no, no. But in general, why is it your right to tell me that my time is running out? Or even just to judge you of like, I think it's so important to acknowledge that women can change their mind and it is okay and it is none of our business. Do you have any advice for women who have felt a little bit of just like shame that they have gone back and forth of if they've wanted kids, because I think people want you to feel shame. If you haven't known your whole life, then you're not meant to be a mom.

Right. And it's like, actually, I have so much maternal instinct. It's absolutely insane. And I can't wait to put it on something and like just love something so much. No, I don't have any advice. Because I just, I just experienced that. I don't know. Just love your truth. And it was a fuck what anybody says to you. And it's okay if you change your mind. You don't have to explain yourself to anyone. I don't know why women are so, we have to explain ourselves so much. Like, stop explaining yourself is actually my advice. You don't have to. You want them? Say it. You don't want them. That's cool, too. You had said all of your ex-boyfriends were going to be like, what the fuck? Talk to me about how, at the time, not wanting kids and being vocal about that, did, if anything, impact your relationships.

I think it's so much easier for men to say they want kids. Yeah. Like, sure you do. Come inside of a woman. Get them pregnant. You can leave if you want. Like, it doesn't, of course you want a kid. Right. It's fun for you. Like, call me nine months. Literally. Let me know. I better grow that thing. I've got to brew it in here. So every guy I've dated has been like, yeah, I want kids one day. And I had such a harsh policy of like, I will not be the mother to your children. I was that crazy about it. I think also because I was like, you don't tell me what I do with my body back then.

And now I've like, I think I spent so much of my time as a child in like living really heavily in my masculine energy to like kind of bother myself that now I feel comfortable sitting more in my feminine and like really sitting and being like, no, I want to be a mom. And I want to not have to protect myself. and have that support and, like, feel beautiful in motherhood. And so that was the juxtaposition for me. They're going to be pissed. But, like, that's not the reason we broke up for literally any of them. Okay, you said all of your ex-boyfriends. What's up?

Are you single? You know, I'm 31. And I had a sound bite for you on this. And I am in a place of my life where I've been in a public figure for 10 years. And I've tried to navigate my private and my public lives for a very long time, not very well. And the reality is I know I'm on a show where I should be talking about my relationships, but like I'm not going to. You're not going to.

You know what? I respect you for that. You're like, I finally figured out. I need to take it behind closed doors and figure out if we're actually good together. and then maybe one day you're all figure out. Okay, so we don't know if you're in a relationship. I do, but you don't. Okay.

Oh, thanks. Okay, in this phase of life, what do you want out of a relationship? Okay, that's a great question. That's fair. Consistency. I think that's one thing that I learned is really important consistency in a partner. Kindness, love. It's like honestly not that hard, I think, to be in a good relationship.

And I'm, you know, it's communication. support for my career. I think the hardest part is that I'm an actor and I naturally will have to go have sex scenes and do things like that. And so trust is really important. I'm a very trustworthy person, but it's hard to trust an actor and I understand that. Just understanding communication. What would you say is your best quality in a relationship? How much time do you have? Go. I'm a fucking amazing girlfriend. Now I am like the shit that I've done to get here. Like I'm Brilliant. You're like, put me in. You want me. You want me. I listen and I care and I'm understanding and I'm an incredibly good emotional communicator because of nine years of weekly

or two times a week therapy. That'll do it. I have a good group of friends. I have a good job. I think I think that I'm kind of the whole package. Okay. We're going to play a game. Okay. We're going to describe a guy and you're going to say if you're in or out. Okay. He took you on the best first date of your life, but he's fresh out of a messy breakup. Out. Yeah. I don't care. I don't care. I don't. It's a great date. I don't care. Right. You're like, call me in six months. Also, but like, no, don't, please. No? I'm 31. Okay. How soon is too soon for someone after a breakup to be approaching you and like really pursuing you?

It just depends on, it could be the next day if it doesn't feel messy. Yes. Okay, he's super fun and social with his friends, but he's shy and reserved around yours. It's fine. I'm in. I think it's kind of charming. Okay. How important is it for you to have your friends be friends with the person that you're dating?

I think it's important that they get along. And that, like, my, there's a couple people in my life that are my North Stars. Yeah. If they love my partner, I'm in. If they hate them, I'm literally out. Like, actually out. Have been there. I have been out.

Love. Oh, that's the best. She's in the other room, one of them. Perfect. Yeah. Okay. He's super communicative, but won't share his location with you. Oh, that's fine.

Would you ever share a location with a partner? I have if they ask. Okay. That's like whatever. Okay. What is the biggest lie that you have ever caught a man in? I was dating this guy I was at work on location

and he called me He just got home Went to bed I love you good night It's great I love you good night Got a call from the guy I was dating before him

Hey I met your boyfriend last night At like 4 a.m. I'm like hey no He was in bed Were you in bed with him? And I really trusted this guy I was like

When I'm telling you like Blind trust on only this partner Because he was just such Like he was that guy And I was like You're lying You're being crazy no I call him the next morning

And I'm like hey is so weird, but he said that he saw you. He goes, no, no, I was at home. Okay. Call him back, I go, you're a fucking liar. He didn't see you. He goes, no. And he starts describing this specific present that I had gotten from that he was wearing.

That, like, no one had posted. It was like, there's no. And I was like, wait a second, hold on. Where were you? And he goes, oh, he was with this very famous 80s pop star and they were like all over each other at this bar. And then I call my boyfriend and he goes, oh. Um, yeah, maybe I was there for like a second. I don't really remember. And then photos came out of them. And I was like, hey, what? Like, hello? Hello? Do you think I'm stupid? Do you think I'm dumb? Do you think I'm dumb? No, not the photos. I don't even know if he did any. I'm sure he didn't cheat on me, but the lie was enough for me to be like, I'm done. Well, no, no, no. The lie is like, crazy. Who cares if you go to an event? Just let me know, like, not, don't say you're going to bed. Hey, but like, why is she all over you? Why are her arms all over you? And why are her arms all over you? you like are you okay and how are you saying you forgot you forgot and you also met my ex you think

he's not going to call me and tell me that you were with some other woman and you also took multiple pictures that night like what like yeah that was crazy it's actually the only time ever caught anybody in a lie no the worst is when photo evidence and he's like he's gaslighting you and then you literally like so what's this i didn't have to get there it was basically like the next like probably i want to say like 4 p.m the next day he was like okay yeah i cut For a second. I'm like, for a second, my ass. For a second. For a second. Wait, so did you say it with him? No. Fuck no. You broke up with him over that? Yeah, absolutely. Love that for you. Um, okay, there were rumors earlier this year. Look at us having a stare off.

Which I leave. I know. What were the rumors about? We literally just locked eyes. I was like, there were rumors. All the lights dim. There were rumors that you were dating a certain rapper. Oh, that's interesting. I haven't heard those. What was going on there? I don't know what you're talking about. You don't know. No. I don't know either.

Who about that? I don't Google myself, so I don't know what you're talking about. You don't even know. Okay. What are you talking about? Madeline, I'm going to. I literally don't know what you're talking about. We're pivoting. Pivot.

Obviously, your friendships on Riverdale were so iconic and everyone was obsessed with you guys. What was your first impression of those women in general? And like, did you even have any idea that you would. May I set the record straight about something on Riverdale, actually? Yeah. I would love to do this on air. Please. Okay.

Recently, an article came out saying that we all fucked each other on the show. I did not touch a single person on that show with a 10-foot pole. May I just repeat that one more time. I did not fuck a single person on Riverdale. I never touched them. That's what happened. Thank you for coming to my TED talk. Wait, did people think you fucked the girls or people on set?

It was just like this article that came out that was like, we all fucked each other all the time. And I was like, hey, no, I did not fuck any of you. I don't claim that shit at all. You weren't into anyone on set. No. I don't mix business and pleasure like that. I've never hooked up with a co-star.

Do you know why, though? You know what's really ironic about all this? Is Cole sat me down during the pilot and was like, if I can give you one piece of advice mats. Do you have a cigarette? Can I borrow? He was like, thanks guys. You can keep that in. He was like, don't, hey, don't hook up with any of your co-stars, okay?

And so I was like, okay, got it. I want. As he is, he's like, Cole. Right. But you know what? Honestly, best advice I've ever been given was from Cole Spress. Right. He's like, I'm going to give you advice that I'm not going to take myself. For sure. But, but no, I never, I never have. That's smart. I think that's really smart. Yeah, thank you. Anyways, back to the girls. Oh yeah. Back to the girls. My first impression was that I actually had known Lily because we, I don't know Vanessa too. I'd known Lily because we did our chem reads together. And she was lovely. And, like, we also were, like, in this thing together where we both had and booked it.

So we had this, like, kind of hive mind. So we flew there together. We lived together season one. Like, we were so close. And we never met Camie. She might have done maybe a Camry with her, but I didn't matter. And then the camie walks in and we all, this is so funny. The way we all met, we were on a group chain.

We're all at the Sutton Place in Vancouver. And we're like, hey, let's all meet in the jacuzzi in an hour. Like, what? Like, why are we meeting the jacuzzi? See, this is why the ruminers got out that you're all like fucking orgies in the hot time at the sudden place. do not clip that we are not having more just a sudden place um no we all met in the hot tub and cammy walks in and she's got like we're we're like 20 21 and she's got this like little black

beating suit on and she got this like tat under her boom and she looks all hot and i was like you're the coolest person ever like bye you're never gonna like me um but no we all became best friends like immediately the three of us were so close it was interesting because the boys and the girls kind of got clicky like the boys all love each other the girls all love each other um but no it was It was like a match made in heaven really fast, almost scarily fast. You're like, this isn't, this is going to burn out quickly and then it just never did. I feel like obviously society tries to pit women against each other and make everyone jealous of each other because it's their favorite thing to do. How did you guys avoid jealousy over like roles and screen time and who is getting more attention and the producers and all the things?

We never had a problem with that. Ever. I think because we all started at the exact same place, we were able to just. support. That was all it was. It was just supporting each other through the hard times, the lows. I mean, being in your early 20s and booking a show like that, that skyrockets to success, thank God we had each other. So it became this thing where instead of pitting each other against each other, we were leaning on each other in every second of the day. Do you think you'll ever rewatch it? No. What about when you have a daughter or a son? I'm not letting her watch

that or him. Wait, why? You were so good. Come on. actually no I will I'm just kidding I wasn't really good you're right no I love Cheryl to be honest I love her I think it's it was eight years of my life there's so many when I watched the episodes I'm thinking about what was happening behind the scenes

like honestly maybe I will rewatch it one day I watched the pilot the other day and started sobbing because I was like alone the show could have been so good like I've watched the pilot and I was like this is what I could have been you're like so close but I'm also so thankful for it like it's exactly it's why I'm where I am right now I met the

friends I have. I love Cheryl Blossom more than anyone could ever love a character in my life. She was the most fun, psychotic, crazy woman of the planet Earth. Um, and always a wild ride and always a challenge. So I can't complain. I think watching it would be, there's still like a bit of sadness about ending. So I think it would be kind of like heartbreaking to watch because I still miss. I was going to work and see my friends every day. Wait, why did you watch the pilot randomly? Um, it was like six, where was I? I was in Tulsa, Oklahoma shooting this movie. And it was like recommended for you, Riverdale, and I was like, ha-ha, okay, what's wrong with me? And I was on, like, night shoot, so I was really over-exhausted. I was like, I'll turn it on to go to bed. I watch the

thing I'm sobbing in bed by myself. Like, hey, what's wrong with you? Are you okay? Honestly, really cute. That was really cute. I do. Look, I really love the show, and I think it was, it was before its time. And I think that's really great. Let's talk about your new movie, The Strangers Chapter 2. Tell me everything. So movie one is kind of like your typical home invasion film. They try to kill us. They succeed. with one, you know. And then the second movie is just me really fighting for my life more from them in the woods. And this time, in crazy circumstances, doing things I never thought I would do.

It's honestly, when I tell you, I'm like, how the fuck did I do this stuff when I watch it? It's like I black out. I don't know what's happening. What was the hardest scene to shoot? There's a scene that it's all my fucking, of course, on my DNRs, which I can't talk about it specifically, but there's a scene where I work with a creature actor. And we had to be if accident to something else. And I get into a full fight with this thing.

And it's like, it's really brutal. And it's really insane. And it was incredibly tough to shoot. And we had half a day to shoot it. It's supposed to be two days. We didn't have enough time in the schedule. But it's so cool. It's so cool.

You have another movie coming out. Maintenance required. This is the complete opposite side of the spectrum. And we're talking about a romantic comedy, which I love. The girl has range. Okay. She's got an axe next to her head. She's running.

Oh, we're so scared. She's a campus on distress. And then we're funny falling in love. Funny falling in love. Okay. What do you think the daddy gang will love most about this movie? Okay. So Charlie, the lead character, me, is a mechanic.

And she's like a hot mechanic. And like I went to mechanic school and like everything I'm doing is real. So it's just really cool. Dude, it's so refreshing to actually hear like you learned how to pull dance from your other movie. You're learning to be a mechanic. Dude, I get paid to learn new skills. Why would I not want to do it? They're like, we can get you a handle.

I'm like, no. Put me in, coach. Like, that sounds so much, like, why would I not want to do that? That's so fun. And it's like, it's like an ode to, I'm sure you've got males probably before most of Daddy Gang's time. There was a Daddy Gang out loud before. It's okay. Sounds good. I like it. But it's like an ode to those 90s, early Oaths, rom-coms that we all love. And I feel like we're trying to get back. It's the haters to trope. It's really fun. Jacob is brilliant in it, my co-star. And it's really fun. And the love is earned.

You were a producer on both of these movies. What made you want to step into that role? I just, if you can't tell by our conversation, I have like a naturally producerial brain, I feel like. So I can, especially being on Riverdale where the kids kind of ran the show. Like we were there for so long that we learned everything we could possibly learn, especially the girls. Like we really soaked that up. We all have production companies now. So I think it just comes naturally to me to produce. I just get it.

I get scheduling. I understand how development works. I have a good brain for creative writing. And like it's just kind of, it was a natural evolution. The strangers I got offered two weeks before we started shooting and was like, hey, I love the concept script's got to be redone. Let's work on that. I go to Slovakia like three days later. I start working on the script with the writers and the producer. I'm like writing in Slovakia. And then it just kind of naturally evolved to me producing it. Same with maintenance required. It was a very similar process. That's really cool. Because even just hearing like all the way back to the beginning of this interview, you talking about how you like loved the arts, you threw yourself into it now to be continuing to like build on what you love. It's so cool to. see you now also like in these movies like it's just we love seeing you on our screens um madeline thank you so much for coming on that was such a journey that was we literally was we literally

started we go high we go low we go high we go low we went all over the place but i feel like the fun thing about sitting down with you is like we see this version of you that we see on our screens in movies television shows we see you online but to hear you actually talk more about who you are, where you came from, why you are the way you are. I think it's going to let your fans and mine just like fall more in love with you and really appreciate watching you grow. And I'm excited to see what the next decade holds for you, my girl. Thanks for making this such a safe space, my girl. Love you. That was really good. Bye. You know,