Call Her Daddy - Stop Having Average Sex (ft. Laren & John Mayer)

Episode Date: June 7, 2023

Join Alex as she travels to Chicago to attend the John Mayer concert with her BFF Laren. The girls sit down to podcast and Laren spills the tea on her new boyfriend. Things take a wild turn as Alex leads the Daddy Gang on a bar crawl through Chicago, making some questionable choices along the way. Alex and Laren share some hilarious moments like relationship fights in bed and Alex's current sexual fantasy. They also dig into the vault and reveal some hilarious home videos from the past. Alex takes you backstage at the John Mayer concert where she catches up with John for a short interview before he performs. Daddy Gang, get ready for a one of a kind episode that truly has it all. *Be sure to WATCH this episode, not just listen, to follow along and get the entire experience!*Call Her Daddy apparel is here. Shop at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠shop.callherdaddy.com

Hello, Daddy Gang. Before you watch this episode, I need to do a quick little disclaimer. You need to watch this episode. This is not one of the episodes that you should be driving in your car and listening to. This format is a visual experience, so please, please, please make sure you're watching this. Also, reminder, you can watch this on your TV. Download the Spotify app if you have Apple TV or if you haveoku and you can just sit back and watch like it's a full show So enjoy that's how I'm about to watch it Here we go What is up daddy gang it is your founding father Alex Cooper with call her with Call Her Daddy.

Okay, we just got to Chicago and Lauren is one minute away. I want to just shout out the Four Seasons because I did not know they even knew I was coming. I'm not kidding you. I just booked a room, thought it was chill. I got a little bit bigger of a room because I wanted to podcast in the room. I just show up. Also, this is why I i love daddy gang i just showed up to the four seasons

there's three girls that walk outside they're like hi alex like i hi and they work at the four seasons like we upgraded you to the presidential suite and they're like yeah we're daddy gang and i'm like daddy gang i love you so they bring me up here. First of all, look at this. They got me a custom robe with little eye masks. How fucking cute is this? Oh my God, look at this bathroom. What? Oh, I could sleep in here. What the fuck?

Is this bigger than your first New York apartment? Oh, are you kidding me? My first bedroom in my New York apartment was probably smaller than this area right here. I like to call this my closet because that's what people think when they first come in here. So I have the smallest room in this apartment. God bless my fucking soul. Yeah, that's the room. Dude, this is insane. Come over here. This feels like this is like a whole fucking apartment. Oh my God. 1-800-CHD. Dude, I'm dying. Welcome to Chicago. And they photoshopped the Four Seasons Hotel Chicago

as like a Call Her Daddy episode. Lauren's gonna freak out. Lauren is coming with this suitcase. She was like, I'm doing a staycation. This is a fucking staycation. Hello. I'm doing a staycation. This is a fucking staycation. Hello? Hello? What? This is hilarious.

I'm literally dying. Do we have a home in Chicago? Literally, you would think I have an apartment. Yeah, this is great. Oh my gosh, look at the view. Isn't this insane? Wow. Okay, so we can podcast here.

We can podcast here. What, 800 seats? Okay. I got to the front desk and they were like, Hi Lauren, how do you like living in Chicago? I walked in and I was like, I already told my mom I walked in and I was like, I don't wear my best friend's clothes anywhere. They're like, enjoy your staycation.

And they set up a little staycation. This is so cute! You're right. This is one bedroom, which I was dying. Cause I'm like, oh, this is the one issue is we want to sleep in the same room. Yeah. Not only do we like to sleep in the same room,

we want to sleep in the same bed. Oh my do we like to sleep in the same room we want to sleep in the same bed oh my gosh and then look at this oh my god i fuck this there's like a peloton shout out to zoe and elizabeth at the Four Seasons. I love you. Thank you so much. This is going to help so much with this episode. This kicked off the whole weekend on a different level. I was excited, but now this is, oh my God. Someone that works with me, Jordan, shout out. She started as my assistant and now she's climbing her way up the ladder for Call Her daddy because she's been working her ass off we've been working on the new studio we've been

having mental breakdowns i need to find her out and she needs to come with us we're gonna go back get jordan out how do i go about this though what if she had plans so plans. She'll cancel them. Friday, March 31st, 8.15am, get turned at 2.25. Perfect. I know that when I did the John Mayer episode, Jordan couldn't be in the room because John wanted, like, no one in the room while we were recording. So Jordan

was in the house while she's, like, listening to John Mayer play but she's, like, not in the room and afterwards I could tell she was just like, oh my god was like torture but amazing because like i wish i could have been there we have to bring jordan out she's been working her fucking ass off at work like i also just love jordan and i want her to be a part of this she deserves to see this man in concert and to actually meet him so i'm gonna call her and see i have no idea what she's doing she may have like plans on friday but i'm gonna offer to fly her out and let's see if she's

down to come okay let's call her watch i'll be like i don't want to spend my friday night with my boss what is happening it should have been like a two-day move wait it's that crazy i feel like there's like nothing there did you move it it just now? Yeah, we just lowered it up. Okay, they're lowering it a little bit. Okay, wait, go into the other room. I wanna ask you something. I was wanted to know if... What?

Say it. If... If I wanted to come to Chicago? Yes. I knew you were gonna say that. If I got you a flight on? Yes. I knew you were going to say that. If I got you a flight on Friday, would you come to the concert with us? Of course. We want you to come.

I'm like, I literally was sitting here. I'm like, it's not right that you're not here. You didn't get to see him play. I would love to. Thank you so much. Oh my God, yes. That would be so fun. Thank you so much.

Of course. Thank you so, so much. Of course! Thank you so, so much! Of course! I was like, Jordan, it doesn't feel right that you're not here and you're not gonna come. Wait, I'm freaking out, yes? It'll be so fun! No, I thank you so much, Jordan, for like handling all this. Oh, Lauren's here. That made me cry.

I don't know how Jordan is gonna be like, you want me to come to Chicago? It's time to podcast. All right, I'm ready. Big glare. Oh, should we put some pants on? Oh, because we're going to be sitting. Yeah, we don't want everyone to see our labias. Maybe we do.

You wouldn't mind. I would. The reason really I don't want people to see my labia isn't because I'm not so proud. It's more because, like, you don't get that shit for free pants on under the robes, are you tight and secure? I'm tight and secure a nipple may pop but like It's not like you haven't seen it before. I was like looking at Aaron like Aaron's telling you Okay We look like an old married couple in our robes

here we go every time we travel together there has to be robes all right let's podcast oh my god i'm like kind of like nervous excited okay daddy gang welcome to the Chicago episode. I am accompanied by my best, best, best friend, Laren. Laren. Her name is Laren. We call her Laren. Let's cheers. I'm so happy. Cheers. Cold coffee. Nothing better. It's so cold. I wanted to act like it was still warm. Welcome to our episode. I'm so fucking happy to have you here. Lauren is back. I'm back.

Why did I just call you Lauren? I don't know. I don't like it. I don't like it either. Let's actually start with that. I call Lauren, Laren. And that's what kind of everyone in Lauren's life calls her. And so every time I post you on the internet, people are like, is her name fucking Lauren or is it Laren?

So let's debunk the rumors. Your name is Lauren McMullen. Yes. Your friends and family calls you Laren. And I think it stems from your mom having her southern accent. Yeah, my mom was so southern. And when I was in second grade, we moved from Texas to Pennsylvania and she had a wild accent and we'd be on the soccer fields and she'd be like Laren I'd be like Mrs. McMullen just

constantly screaming like Laren and then to me she'd be like Alex like it was a lot of like I everyone loved her accent still to this still she still has it um that actually reminded me how long have we known each other second grade so what you're seven so 21 years oh my god that's probably my one of my longest friendships we've been best friends for 21 years yeah we have this bond I feel like that is so much stronger than just like a friendship that you see because it's like there's so many layers to what we've been through together and it's like one thing to like meet a friend at some point in your life and be like this is my history it's like oh like you've lived my whole history with me and like not even from a distance like

our families were like intertwined in it fast forward forward. Here we are now. And it's so crazy to say like you then were just like at my engagement. Oh, I'm not wearing my ring also just to clarify because it's over. It's over. It's fucking over. Sorry, Matt. I'm moving to Chicago. I love the four seasons. No, I, I am, I'm not wearing it right now because, but when we're recording this, I am still haven't yet released that episode to the world.

And I know there's so many daddy gang in Chicago and I'm so excited to see all of you, but my luck would be like someone releases it before I get to say it. But let's go back to your little news. Um, miss, I'm in a a relationship i'm so happy for you i'm happy for myself too you now have a relationship and it's so my days on the streets are over i'm calm i'm chill you're gonna see a different side of me in this episode i might have a few drinks you know like fast forward lines black out on the floor at the bar, like fully tanked. When you see a diamond, it shines so bright. Please explain how long have you been in this relationship? Tell us all the tea.

We have been together a little bit over a year now. Like I thought I was a pretty happy person. And like I didn't know it was like possible to be like this happy. Oh my God. And your cheeks are like red and rosy you're so okay tell us how you guys met we met um on a new year's eve trip I was going with a girlfriend he was going with one of his guy friends they were siblings and they had a house in Tahoe and the first night I get there and he wears glasses and his room was where like the laundry was. And I had to go in and like, it's like one in the morning and he's like sitting on his bed, like doesn't have glasses on. And I walk in the room to like put laundry in and he's

like, hi, like can't really see me because he doesn't have glasses on. And I was like, hi, I'm Lauren. And he can't see me. So I'm just a blob in his mind. And, but I was like hi I'm Lauren and he can't see me so I'm just a blob in his mind and but I was like oh I'm gonna hook up with that man I remember you texting the group I texted you that first night like there is someone so hot on this trip like and at the time you were like still single you were like I'm just gonna go for it and then you sent a picture because the next day someone took a photo of you guys and you were near each other I'm like he's so fucking tall he's so cute like what the fuck and then it happened well i played the slow game obviously and obviously no not obviously lauren from your track record it's like not slow game yeah you're right so you you did play this slow well because we were there for a full week and i was like

you know like i gotta do some slow build up like I don't want to just like hook up on the first night. And like I got to slowly drop hints. So he says he didn't even know I was into him until like the last night with New Year's Eve. And we were at a bar New Year's Eve. And he went to kiss me at midnight. And I literally swerved him. I was like, I just got nervous. Wait, what?

I love how the first night you're texting me like I'm gonna hook up with this person four days goes by New Year's Eve like I'm working it playing the long game like dropping it laying my moves and then wait and the time came when I froze and so you swerve him and then like what did you say I don't I think I was just like weird and awkward and but then like an hour later I got a little more liquid courage and think I was just like weird and awkward. And, but then like an hour later I got a little more liquid courage. And then I was just like grabbed his head and was like, that is so everyone on the trip was like, yeah,

that's also so you of like being like, I'm going to do it. And then like lightly in the moment being like, should I be doing this? Like overthinking it. And then like on your terms going right back in an hour later. Okay. So then that was in Tahoe. And then you realize you both live in Chicago yeah because

I feel like I had been meeting a lot of people um like they lived in California they lived in New York and I was like well this like can't be anything and I had only been single for a year at that point for my seven-year relationship and like in my mind I like still wanted like I wasn't really done being single yet so like when I met him I was like oh like that was a fun hookup in Tahoe like he's a nice guy and then we realized we live in walking distance to each other so then I was like cool I have someone to have sex with in walking distance and like that was that right I do remember that where you're like it will be nice because I'll have like a hookup buddy that's like close by and like I don't have to Uber. Yeah.

Lauren's thinking so logistically and I'm like, that's great. And I will say Lauren and I, most of our lives in terms of relationships, we've always been on different pages. If you're in a serious relationship, I'm like fucking 12 guys over here and being like, I've got like all these different side pieces and situationships and I'm like going through it and then all of a sudden I get into a serious relationship and a healthy one for the first time basically in my life with Matt when we moved to LA and you become single yeah and then I was like I kind of want to be single with Lauren like it was like it was hard for I think us in the beginning to be like on such different

pages and you and it's like something unsaid of like for friendships you can be on different pages in romantic situations but it's kind of hard especially if like you're living together and like if you're single and you're in a relationship like a fun night out for a single person is probably like how can we like go meet as many guys as possible and for a person who's starting a serious relationship it's like oh like how can we like go meet as many guys as possible and for a person who's starting a serious relationship it's like oh like I want to like go enjoy like a nice dinner with you and then go home to my partner yes and so we were like on such different pages in LA and we made it work for sure but it was I think it was just so we were so aware that like whoa we're in

such different places but now you're in a healthy relationship and you brought your boyfriend to the engagement party and i was nervous though because i like i didn't know if that was like a weird move to like no bring your boyfriend to someone's because you never met him that was the crazy part is she's been dating him for a year we've facetimed yeah we've facetimed and like lightly spoken but like you live in Chicago like and I've every time you come out to LA you've been alone so I've never met your boyfriend and so the best part I think about that whole situation was how well we got along like me and your boyfriend and then how well our boyfriends got along I know after the trip I was asking my boyfriend I was like oh like what was like your favorite moment of the weekend

and he was like I gotta say it was smoking that cigar with Matt and then simultaneously I'm in bed with Matt and I'm like oh my god like what did you think of Lauren's new boyfriend he was like I like him so much like we had such a great conversation and like, he's really someone that you can like get deep with and talk about like everything. Like I felt like I knew him for so long. Like he's a great guy. Like we should totally do couples trips. I was going to say like, that's like the thing that's like, now we're in like different pages, different pages, but now we're finally like synced up. Our cycles are matched up and we can go on couple things now because i remember like almost like a year like a little less than a year ago i had been like maybe

we'll do couples trips but like i was like i don't know like what if matt and your boyfriend don't get along or like not that they don't get along but like it's always like a little nerve-wracking when like we get it's like it almost be like a disappointment like yes man like i guess it's just like some people like just don't vibe totally and like we get along so well and it's so easy that it's just like the anticipation like oh like they're great like i hope it works but i will say like it was a different feeling for me bringing this boyfriend to like a setting where it's like okay like we're going to someone's like engagement like you know like be self-aware yes and be social be social and like

i looked around and he was completely by himself like lauren's boyfriend was like talking to my parents like talking to our friends talking to matt talking to matt's family i was like he can fully hold his own in a room which i think you've needed because prior it was like your partner was nervous because if i would have brought my ex to your engagement my ex would have been the drunkest person at the party. And you were constantly like on alert in social settings. You're the most social. I was like embarrassed and feel like I was like compensating and like to the point where I was like,

you know, I think I might not be being invited to certain things because like. Of your partner at the time. Which I think is also a huge part is like, if anyone's listening, if you have a weird gut feeling every time you bring your partner around people and like you're constantly like being super like oh my god like I can't leave

their side or like overcompensating and like like you have to follow up conversations like oh I'm sorry like he didn't mean that or like I don't know why he said that or like bad yeah like that red flag red flag your partner like that should be like an early test like throw him into your friends and see how he fends and vibes like those are people who have like stood the test of time and like care about you and there's something different to be said of like if your partner is an introvert that's okay well like they were a little awkward or whatever but there's a difference between that and then someone actually genuinely making you uncomfortable with like the actions and like everyone's gonna have a weird night yeah we're like maybe they get too drunk or they say something

stupid but like if it's a consistent thing I feel like that's something that you and I have both experience of a partner that's like embarrassing us or we're feeling so uncomfortable to go out with and I feel like this was the first time where I was so happy like I was like beaming watching your boyfriend like walking around and watching you work one side of the room him be on the other side and I was like fucking finally Lauren has someone that she can now actually be her full self especially around the people that she loves like you don't have to apologize not that you ever had to apologize because it was one of those things we're like we know yeah it's been seven years we know I know I know I know but now it's like it's amazing so lauren is in this healthy great relationship not to say we both don't have like things that we're working on

in relationships which i think we should talk about yeah like that i think that's something to get into because if therapy was like an olympic. I've been fucking training for the Olympics for the past two years. Like I am deep in my individual therapy game. Lauren, no, it's so true. And like, I thought I had my shit figured out. I was like, not in LA. That was part of my journey that a lot of you saw, but that was the beginning stages.

And I have done a lot of work since then, been going to weekly therapy for over two years now. And I entered into this relationship and I was like all like high and mighty. Like I got my shit figured out. Like, welcome to my world. Like, can you like meet my caliber? Can you like meet me in like my wokeness no but actually you were like in your therapy like i've never seen yeah and then i have like i can legitimately say like i have never been in a healthy relationship in a lot of ways yep before this one and like getting into a really serious relationship where like you're not doing the bullshit and like it's real and like you're trying to like make things seriously work you learn a lot about yourself really really fast

and you learn all the flaws and the shit and the baggage that you're bringing to the table that you can probably hide when it's like just you and your own and you're alone but yeah I'm like learning a lot about myself and I'm really happy and in love. And but enough about me. We'll get more into that later. Speaking of love, how's engaged life? It's fucking amazing. I will say.

Is sex better when you're engaged? I will say our sex has been insane. But enough about me and my engagement and you and your relationship. I'm fucking starving. We have a friend in town and we are going to go get some deep dish pizza. Oh, I'm giving you the Chicago experience this weekend. Like you don't even know what we got planned. I don't understand.

Let's go get dressed and let's go get pizza. Oh, Erin. Ah, get out of Nikki. I have been doing my eyebrows for 45 minutes. This one is not matching this one and i know they're supposed to be sisters not twins but they're like distant cousins at this point and it's like not going well we're just like trying to get ready for our lunch i like that jacket this is cool yeah yeah where'd you get that i forget house of what oh

house of sunny we're kind of matching. Oh my God, do we both have white sneakers? Yeah. Blue jeans. We have our brown jackets. What are you wearing, a black shirt? Oh! And a black shirt. Ooh!

Oh my God, and we have tortoiseshell sunglasses on. Which is crazy because we did get ready together, but I will say this was not intentional. We weren't fully staring at each other getting our outfits ready. I have a habit when I get in elevators, I start to tap dance. Wait what? I'm really quite amazed

How much the Four Seasons just like loves you it never gets old even as much as I get to now like do Like luxurious glamorous shit like this now It's I still feel like when we were like young and like it still doesn't like this now, it's, I still feel like when we were like young and like it still doesn't like hit me, that it's like, this is my life. I guess you haven't been like rich like that long. Should we just start drinking now? I've lived here for two years

and I've truly only had deep dish like three times. One of them being with you. It's very filling. I think we both have a soft spot in our hearts years and I've truly only had deep dish like three times one of them being with you. It's very filling. I think we both have a soft spot in our hearts for New York style like the greasier the better. Okay now. We're filming! Stop!

Wait a second. Oh my god! Hi! Love you! Oh my god! Chicago Daddy Gang is like no other Daddy Gang. So this area right in front of us, I'm like 95% sure this is called the Viagra Triangle. The Viagra Triangle?

If I remember correctly, it's because there's a lot of old men in this area who like to get jiggy with it and need a little extra help. Wait, what? Are you making that up? No, I'm dead serious. Turn around, turn around, and then I get a little bit lonely. Turn around, la, la. I don't actually know the words like any songs I'm the boy in your other phone Lighting up inside your drive at home

All alone Pushing 40 in the friend zone We talking and you walk away Every day So what are we doing tonight? So tonight we are doing a two-person bar crawl. I have a car and the car and driver is going to take us to 15 bars that I have planned. 15? 15? We'll see how far we make it. I wanted us to have options. Yes. Oh, you're about

to get me fucking hammered. When Lauren and I get drunk together, how would you describe it? Unhinged. Hello? Hello. Oh my god, look at us all wearing unwell. Hello hello Do you wanna drink Yes, okay, you're gonna stay here. I'm gonna thanks Kate you inspired me I'm gonna go have my confessional moment and play bartender. I'll be back in two drinks. Okay, but we can't fight like me and Kate did. What's the date? I'm too vulnerable. Welcome to my laboratory confessional. My goal for the night is quite simply to get Alex Cooper fucked up.

I wanna bring her back to the days when we were living in New York City before all of this. Now she's such a workout-holic that everything is for the daddy gang. I don't even wanna say for content. I wanna say it's just for the daddy gang and to make Call Her Daddy the best possible brand. She does shit like this,

and I think she forgets to stop and take it in and actually look around and have fun and enjoy herself. So the goal tonight is fun and fun rhymes with fucked up so we're gonna get her fucked up cheers oh she's taking a shot tonight of Malort if you're a Midwestern daddy gang you know what Malort is I have to tell you Lord Malort Malort let's put a little let's drop an image of Malort right here it's a specialty type of like liqueur and I googled it and it tastes like a vine from hell. It's like, I'm ready.

I just have to time it right because she needs to be not sober and where she's gonna be like this is actually disgusting but not drunk enough or I'm gonna like have her throw up and in the night yeah so it's all about timing first drink of the day should we do that thing what's like hi my name is lauren and this is before i have any drinks we should do that as a tiktok hello darling oh my god cheers i don't know if you've got to this point in your relationship yet but back i would say like a couple months no like almost like a year ago I wanted to fucking kill Matt when we would sleep because he's a cuddler right he is Matt is like the cuddliest person he's like I love you I want to like get all up in there and

I'm like back the fuck up get the I'm like the most unloving person can you give me my deodorant yes and I would say that my like I will cuddle right before bed. Like, up until bed, unless I get fucking hot. But most of the time I will cuddle with him. But the minute we're like, okay, time to go to fucking sleep. Get the fuck to the east and I'll go to the west. Okay, what is your sleep routine? Um, I wouldn't say it's a routine.

I would say it's more of a battlefield. Oh, so you're in it. I'm in it. I would say it's more of a battlefield. Oh, so you're in it. I'm in it. I become like defensive of my space because my boyfriend's like tall. He's 6'4". So like his limbs are long and like every night I will get on the bed, because he's usually in bed before me, and I'll get into the bed and I'll pull the blanket back and I'm like, you're crossing the midline. And he's like Like no like my elbows my elbows touching the edge of my bed like yeah But like you can't take up more than the midline and you're over the midline

So I thought he was gaslighting me because I'm like you're over the midline So I was like looking at up and down the internet I was looking on Etsy to find sheets that have a line down the middle. So I can just be like, look. What the fuck? You're over the midline. You're gaslighting me. Yeah.

I get like the ick at bedtime. Lauren just said she gets the ick at bedtime. We might have to end it. That is so good, though it's so relatable. We got two big people in the bed. A queen bed's not enough. I'll chop that up to me. I'll take ownership here because I'm in a healthy relationship.

Dude it's a battle. A few few few trips ago when we were in the Hamptons we woke up and your pants are off And I was like Alex why are your pants off? And then you pulled the blanket down and you were sleeping on a towel and like Alex. Why are you sleeping on a towel? I forgot about this! There was thunder and she got scared and she peed the bed While I was in the bed with her That is not the whole story

What is the whole story? I heard a really fucking scary noise Thunder and like we were in the middle of fucking nowhere And if you've ever been to the Hamptons you fucking know there's no cell service And we had had a really weird experience with this uber driver where I was like, oh we're dead like we're dying tonight So then my mind was that because the uber driver dropped us off at our home He knew where we lived and so every creaking crawl that I heard that night I knew our uber driver was just coming up the deck and barging in to which then I heard the thunder and before I

Registered it as thunder. You peed the bed. I may have accidentally let out a little tinky winky. I like black it out, because I don't see it as peeing the bed, I see it as like, I woke myself up to defend myself Oh HR what are you doing a fit check you go like this hi guys my name is Alex I'm from Pennsylvania I'm 28 and this is what I'm wearing out to the bar tonight. All aboard, Daddy.

Get ready to go to the living room. Watch them. They're all watching. Reality show is back. There is a bar that has a special place in my heart in Chicago. And it's called Old Crow. When Lauren and I last time were here, Lauren and I were doing a bar crawl. We were on a trolley. We were having a shin dig.

And we were with a shin dig because we had shin guards on our legs. And we randomly were like, let's leave the group. Let's just go bar hopping by ourselves. It's our thing. We like to go bar hopping alone. Two people bar crawl. So we show up to this bar and we got so intoxicated and so much fun that we ended up on stage at the end of the night and we got up there with our shin guards on and it was

pouring rain and we had our rain jackets and i don't even know what i said on stage we'll play we'll cue the music cue the footage lauren you're coming on stage. I want to be very clear, you're coming on stage. I am not sober and I'm not supposed to be out here. Please give 10 seconds. This kind of is like where we're going to start tonight. We now are excited to go back. We know the manager because he drove us home last time. That is like a little murky why that ended up happening. The balancer also ended up just like naturally. Shout out Mark G.

Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Holy shit. Come on, let's go take a shot. Yeah. Let's go. Let's go.

Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Don't cry.

I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. Cry! I think that's the best song I've ever done. You were so much fun!

Oh, this is a guy that was singing it on the spot! You're boring all of us, you have a small penis! This is going straight to hell. Thank you. Oh my god! Where do we pee? This is our first bar. Hi it's Alex. Excuse me, get out of my confessional. Oh. What did we hear about, Beth?

Potatoes. We know my mission earlier was... And look to your left. The potatoes in Idaho are... What? We got what we needed. We met Ben two years ago, and we told a little story in the car on the way here about a man who drove us home when we were wearing shin guards. That's this man.

Do you still have the shin guards? I kept those shin guards. They're in a case. You sold them on eBay? No, I did not. Absolutely not. Yes. You covered the stain! No, don't cover the same. It's perfect Good thing fuck me first and then let's talk. Let's go Gee you were episode one, two, three back in 2018.

Please introduce yourself and tell us your name. I'm Lindy, I'm from Chicago, and I am Danica! Let's go. I think you can write 10-1. Yeah. I can't write. I don't know. Left foot.

I'm fucking fucking. I have a list of questions. If you could interview anyone next week, who would it be? Jennifer Coolidge. Done. Oh, I'm going to fucking bite your little cock off And I'm gonna fucking swim in that little wiener hole She is the most legendary actress of all time And like whatever she's doing I'm like I want to be a part of it Go

What's your most memorable daddy gang interaction? I would say the time that a daddy gang member brought me a dildo. And then I used it 30 minutes later. What's something that currently makes you cringe on the internet? Probably whatever the fuck I just did at that last bar. What the fuck did I just say?

What? When's the last time you faked an orgasm? Oh, that's a great question. What's something you have never done in the bedroom that you'd be open to trying? I would say, I would say but I recently just did. What?! Ah! I What?! recently just did. What? Ahhh! I

What? I didn't know about that. I've been so busy with that. Two weeks ago. No, no, no, you're a drink. Do you think you've let anyone down in your life recently? Nana, I know you're dead, but...

Pfft. That bitch always wanted to be famous. Cheers! Lauren, what is this? This is the malorc shot that I got for you. Okay Lauren, go fuck yourself. Wait, I was supposed to give a happy how was it? What was that bad? I will say this. Lauren has it out for me.

What are they singing? You know the song? Give me, give me, give me a man of the midnight. Won't somebody... Oh! What? What? What? What? It's really hard to be cool. What's the final result?

Who's drunker? Who the fuck do you think? I don't think anyone knows the life that you can live in the sky. What? What? When you see a diamond, that you can live in the sky. What? What? What?

When you see a diamond, it shines so bright. Hello. Hey, wait, wait! I'm trying to help that bitch out. Thanks. All right, stop. Where are we? What's going on, Laryn?

What time is it? 12.17. I fucking love that shit. it's live it's live is my hair crazy can i put clothes on oh yeah are you naked yeah i i woke up and it was 80 degrees and i was dying so i'm like i have to get naked i went to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night your ass was out no wait can i tell you something before you get unnaked yeah i woke up at like seven o'clock and i started to get like the scaries because i remember that i went on stage oh my god we facetimed matt for so long last night

i'm like what did we say jesus christ good morning last night no this is so sad i have no water so nice outside i think i should put clothes on dude i feel like you're gonna get hit by a bus oh my god this is how you know i was so fucked up because when i get drunk i get so confident i went on that horse started riding it like i was fucking a penis i literally got up on the horse and everyone was like i don't know if you want to do that alex and i was like i think i want to do that that horse was not for riding like i don't even want to look at my story did you post one i'm pretty sure my entire story is from last night, I don't even want to look at my story. Did you post one? I'm pretty sure my entire story is from last night, and I don't even know what I posted.

Let me see. Oh, my goodness. Oh. You a centipede. I have a full centipede story. Let's delete that now. Oh, my God. We have to talk about this man.

Who was this man? I went on stage and announced to everyone that everyone in that bar was having average sex. And we needed to ramp it up. I feel like we're having like really average sex. What the fuck? That's why I have anxiety. Can we get edibles before that? Oh, you have them.

I have them right here. Can we take them? Of course. Whenever I'm feeling like a little like, oh oh i'm like send pictures of the dogs immediately okay so we walk into this bar and the minute we get there there was daddy gang and they were like please let me buy you a drink and i was like no let me buy you a drink and i go up to the bartender and i'm like i need 20 shots of tequila so we started just immediately taking shots there were no drinks it was just straight shots you went from like you went from

zero to a hundred like we walked into that bar like relatively sober it's because when I see the daddy gang there's we're like both genuinely so excited and all of them are like telling me their stories of like whatever it is that like they want to say and so I'm like and all of them are like telling me their stories of like whatever it is that like they want to say and so I'm like hugging all of them getting like emotional and I love how you and I interact in those situations because I always just go like this you just like reach over and you just grab me I'm like Lauren and Lauren's like I'm over here and you're like talking to daddy gang and we're both just like completely separated and then we swing back to each other who was that man with the long hair that like that became like my personal protector yeah literally looked like jesus

there are now people handing me shots and also i was like i'm so sorry like fuck i'll take it and then you guys were like alex this is your 15th shot like you're like no more shots you're literally gonna be dead and i was like but if daddy gang's giving me a shot i have to take it so finally a girl comes with a glass this large and it's like take this alex and i'm literally like um what's it called a car irish car but it was like this fucking large and i was kind of like oh that doesn't look like that and so these this jesus man that was following me around that we were like who is he he ends up coming over and i was like i don't know if i want to take that and jesus took the cup and literally without a hesitation

was like and chugged the whole thing and i'm like sir who are you and also while all this happening he never spoke a word no never spoke a word he was like that when he kicked me out i'm like sir i know her lauren's literally waving from behind like the like roped off area and lauren's like alex i'm like lauren what are you doing over there she's like i got kicked out originally we were gonna go on stage to sing karaoke thank god we did not sing karaoke what that was a plan and then lauren i remember you looking at me and saying you were like we will ruin everyone's night if we go up on stage and we sing hannah montana because everyone's like oh you can sing miley and lauren's like no we would specifically be singing be singing Hannah Montana and I just don't think anyone would enjoy us singing. I think

you would kill the whole vibe in this bar. We can take it down one notch. So then we left that bar after we got off stage and then we went to another bar and that's where it all took a turn. Oh you got mad at me you're like Lauren you made me take this disgusting shot. Oh, no, I didn't get mad. I reprimanded you. Then we like somehow got home. No, Lauren wakes up this morning and she comes over and she goes, why is like the toilet paper thing broken? And I'm like, I'm pretty sure your fat ass sat on it and broke it.

Was she peeing? She was was peeing and i was just like it looked like you were like waiting to pee lauren when we get drunk and we come home it's like we can't separate we're like oh my god like if i'm gonna go pee you have to come and stand with me while i fucking pee i was having some wild dreams last night i woke up and i had was having a dream that the chain smokers and pedro were in bed with us pedro like the one doing the move i need more water okay i think this is a perfect way to end this morning okay Okay, Daddy Gang, we're going to order some bagels. We're going to get some food.

We're going to eat it. And then we're going to go back to bed for a little bit. But we will see you when we're alive again. And we look a little bit better. Two hours later. Hello? Hello? Jordan! So excited.

We were so hungover, Jordan, so we got so high. That's the cure. When you feel like shit, you have to shut up. I was going to say, and now I like kinda still feel high that I'm like, yeah. You should fill a bowl with ice water and put your face in it. Oh yeah, let's do that.

Although the ice is deep. I knew Jordan would come in with all the solutions. She's my safe space. I'm looking you in the eye. It's snack time. Snack time. I ate one of those little ones last night. What, it broke?

Was it good? I don't remember. Oh my gosh. Calm me, daddy. Oh my gosh. Call me daddy. Ew. Ew, it's hard chocolate. Have you ever been in one of my episodes? No.

Hi guys! Hi guys! My name is Kristen. My name is Kristen. I like to party. Kristen has been best friends with Lauren and I since as long as Lauren and I've been best friends kristen went to saint andrew catholic school with us and then when lauren left us after second grade she was actually catholic and is catholic and we still are we catholics no don't don't group me into this i'm not i don't want to be part of this. We went to Catholic school.

Lauren left us. And then Kristen and I went all to 8th grade together. But we were also playing soccer together. And our parents were all friends. And all of them were friends. So we all have known each other since we concluded. Since 7 years old. 21 years. 21 years we've been friends.

So Kristen's coming to the concert with us. We are very excited. We remade Step Up and Kristen was Channing Tatum and we had her put a wig on her fucking head. You guys, I was always the boy. She was always the boy. To be fair, to be fair, you were taller. I was that friend.

You were taller and Kristen always was willing to throw on the wig and it was like a little bowl cut. No, but the best is my head was always really big so the wig would be like, the hairline would be like up here. It would be coming all over. 5, 6, 7, 8. I Only step up but mean girl. Yeah, we went I was scratching your resume Damien. Who do you think she was? What are you talking about Regina George is not not sweet. She's a scoffing

roadkill. She ruined my life. She's fabulous. She's evil. I don't know. I was wearing pants. Oh my god. Thank you. This is the car I want. This is Damien. He's almost too gay

to function. Oh my god. I love your mom is Damien. He's almost too gay to function. Oh my god, Damien, I love you, I love you, I love you. She's starting to sing about... Damien, coming out! Okay, it's not about hating her, it's just I thought it would be a little fun experiment just to see all the mean things Regina George says. I'm going to give you a guide to North Shore. Now, where you sit in the cafeteria is crucial. You got everybody here.

Always want to sing for the queen. Who cares? I care. Every other scene you stood as part of for the underclassmen, it's called the spring fling. Every other scene you stood as part of for the underclassmen, it's called the spring fling. And like the girls would be like, I'm kinda hungry.

I'm like, sit down, we have to film this scene. We have to film this scene. You guys were always good sports, but like no one ever, except for our parents, sometimes would be like, girls, no one's seeing this. Like you can, you don't have to film this scene. You guys were always good sports, but like no one ever, except for our parents, sometimes we'd be like, girls, no one's seeing this. Like you can, you don't have to film it today. And we're like, yes we do, we have a timeline. Like no one was ever seeing this video.

It was really, like we would get like really like seriously upset. Like guys, we're falling behind on like our filming schedule. We have a lot of new players in this. Jordan, he's never been on episode, look Jordan's been staring out into the, like. On the cruise. This literally looks like like an album cover staring out into the, uh, lake. On the cruise.

This literally looks like an album cover of like, Jordan, the way she's sitting. It's like I'm using video cue. Let the rain fall down on me, but it won't show my tears. Jordan! No, the song I always sing was, three little birds, Shining out of my window, And they told me I don't have to worry Summer came right to me

So sweet Little girl, double dutch on the crossroads Stunning! I ordered everything. Dream of ways to make you understand my pain Clouds of sulfur in the air Farms of water We're gonna put our heads in here because we desperately need to wake the fuck up before this concert. And we don't, they didn't give us a bowl that we can wear.

And I don't want to get my hair wet in the shower. Me neither. Oh my god. Oh! I feel like I'm being water-pointed. Oh, fuck. Oh my god. Oh, I got my hair wet. Oh, fuck.

Holy fuck! Woo! I'm gonna do one more dip. I honestly feel like a new person. Will you hold me one more time? Sure. She couldn't just do it. We're in a hair in a bun. We're ice bath addicts now.

Yeah, we are. Wow. Woo! Let's go. Let's go. Lauren just poured her dry. You literally look like you're going gray. Why is it a plant?

Do you have a blonde thing? Can you just use this? No, I'll use this one. I'm gonna let it soak in and then massage it. You're gonna let your hair bake? And then this is wet from the ice. And then this is wet from the ice bath, but I was too lazy to dry it, so. No one really ever wins in heartbreak warfare. If you want more love, why don't you say so?

If you want more love We are on our way to the John Mayer concert. It's Jenny. We are a little rushed because, you know, when you've got all the girls together, we never shut the fuck up when we're getting ready, so naturally it took us a little bit longer. We're only like 16 minutes away, which is great, and thankfully there's no tornadoes yet.

It's supposed to be, there's, yeah, whatever. I'm about to pop off on the ox. Go pop off. Okay. Pop off. Say it's a... yeah, whatever. I'm about to pop off on the ox. Go pop off. Okay. Pop off. Say a song. Thanks, John. We're going down, and you know that we're doomed.

What? Daddy Gang, we're fucking back back look who's to my left hi john just casually back i figured that episode was so fun i now needed to see you live in concert doing what you do best i feel like it was so fun for the daddy gang to see you going on tour i think they're like freaking the fuck out they're already messaging me being like we're gonna be out there in the stands like we can't wait to see you going on tour. I think they're like freaking the fuck out. They're already messaging me being like, we're going to be out there in the stands. Like, we can't wait to see you.

Like, it's really cool that you did this tour. Uh, thank you. And part of what made this tour happen was the podcast that we did, where I sat across from you and played guitar and went, Oh, there's something here in the kind of intimacy of that performance.

No joke. I did not know I was going to do a solo tour when I did that podcast. And it kind of inspired me to do it. Kind of inspired me to do it. So thank you. That makes my heart warm because the amount of people out there right now waiting for you, like we're getting to celebrate you being on tour again. I'm like fucking fangirling already. Lauren has a story for you. It's so cute. You've met Lauren before, but you don't know it. Go ahead, Lauren. I was a junior in high school, and NYU was, like, my dream school,

and I got in early decision, and I was, like, sick. Like, I'm going to go visit. So I went to visit and stay with someone who was already going there, and we're walking to go out, and we're walking down the sidewalk, and you're eating dinner on, like, an outdoor cafe where, like, the tables are on the street, and there's, like, and I'm walking and I look up I'm just like and like you look up and you look at me and you're like hey and I'm like hi and you're like what are you doing here I'm like I just got into college and I'm visiting the college and you're like education that's the future of America that's what I said yeah so good so good all I hear when I hear that if I reference back what I said so good so good

all I hear when I hear that if I reference back what I must have been thinking was like just like nervousness to relate to people like just being nervous right right being like oh my god you're going to college like I'm going to say something I'm going to say something so I'm going to say that

to know that that like stuck with her for her whole life and yeah she's getting to meet you and it's really fucking cute that's very I mean when people tell me that they met me and they recount the story there's always a part of me was like did you get the nervous part of me that came out really kind of like an asshole no did you get the nervous part of me that came out like sincere no it's the fact that you're inspirational yeah I was like this is NYU this is sick I was like, this is NYU, this is sick! Tell the Daddy Gang how you're feeling about this tour. How's it going so far?

The tour is going great. Every night's a little bit different. I write the set lists that make me happy. I don't feel like I'm caged into playing any songs from any record, and I'm having a blast. I didn't realize that in our episode you were playing some songs that you had not played in like a really, really long time. Yeah, I haven't played Dreaming with a Broken Heart in forever. How did you feel after the episode of like any comments or like did anything stand out to you? It made me feel understood.

I feel understood by my friends and my family and the people in my world. I don't feel insanely understood by people outside of it. And I've learned that that's okay, but good work when you can get it when people you don't know start to understand you a little better. When I know that that's taking place, I feel great. I think I mentioned this to you, like maybe someday if I need to remember how I actually feel, I might listen to it again. No, that was like,

I will say that really stuck with me when you texted me that saying like, if I ever lose my way or I'm just like confused about like, I can always go back to that episode and see that. I was like, don't make me cry, John. Yeah, you really helped me put my thoughts into order. And we all want to put our thoughts into order. I think I finally learned how to answer things really sincerely.

Yeah. Instead of thinking about what I want them to look like after I say them. And weirdly, I think, as you saw, when you answer them sincerely, people can feel that. And they were like, fuck. Like, I connect with him. Okay, go do your thing.

We're so excited to see you out there. We will be screaming. I'm gonna lose my voice even more. And I'm so excited. It's gonna be great. And it's good to see you again. And thank you for your trust and wanting to do that podcast. And I love Daddy Gang. I love Daddy Gang. Woo! They love you. Okay. And they're wet. Let's go. When sky blue gets dark enough To see the colors of the city lights

A trail of ruby red and diamond white Hits her like a sunrise She comes and goes and comes and goes Like no one cares And she's always buzzing just like Neon, neon Neon, neon Who knows how long, how long, how long She can go before she burns away

I can't be her angel now You know it's not my place to hold her down And it's hard for me to take a stand When I wanna take her any way I can She comes And she goes Like no one can She comes And she goes

She's slipping Through my hands She's always buzzing Just like neon, neon Neon, neon Who knows how long, how long, how long She can go before she burns away, away And wave away Me so cool.