Call Her Daddy - You are the Fuck Buddy, nothing more.

Episode Date: May 11, 2022

This week, your father gifts you with a day in her life. This bitch is Vlog Podcasting again. Your father is a grown up… Alex has summer plans and she’s willing to share them. But first Alex reminisces on all the toxic men who gave her PTSD by planning trips, then ditching her ass seconds before flights were boarding. Your father recognizes she used to be a child. Alex exposes herself for ruining a college boy’s life, when she abandoned him at the club for a World Series Champion, a mere 13 feet away. Alex hasn’t had sex in months- and birth control is to blame. Is it advice you’re looking for? We’ve got it! You are a FUCK BUDDY nothing more. Advice given. Also, two men close to Big Al divulge the issues men are having in the dating scene. Ladies listen up. Lots to learn here. And stick around till the end for a surprise worth waiting for… Daddy Gang, you won’t want to miss this.

What is up, Daddy Gang? It is your founding father, Alex Cooper, with Call Her Daddy. Hello, everyone. Welcome back to another episode of Call Her Daddy. I am your host, Alexandra Cooper, coming to you live from bed. I have been on my third hour of binging television and it's 10 in the morning and I figured I'd stop binging and I would just start podcasting because yeah it's May but I'm already feeling like that like summer Tuesday vibe where like you're checking out on Tuesday let me tell you what I did this morning my eyes opened I grabbed my telephone telephone first why am I calling a telephone I sound like eyes opened. I grabbed my telephone. Telephone first. Why am I calling it a telephone? I sound like I'm 80. I grabbed my iPhone and I started online shopping. I didn't

even look at Instagram. I just went right to the online shopping. And I don't know if you guys can relate to this, but like when you start online shopping, you keep all those tabs open, right? And you put a bunch of shit in your cart and then you can either marinate on it for a couple days you're like am i gonna buy this am i gonna get this one am i gonna find something better and then naturally all of a sudden you find yourself on shein or like i like to call it shein you buy a bathing suit from shein and you are guaranteed a yeast infection. So I've been online shopping for summer because I have plans this summer and I usually have no plans. We like accountability culture here on Call Her Daddy. I want to take accountability that I have a history of never making plans in my life. And that's my own doing. And really more

so with regard to like my relationships, not as much with my friends, but like when I'm dating someone or when I'm seeing someone, when I'm talking to someone in the past, between the ages of 15 and 25 years old, I engaged in toxic relationships. And I'm also self-aware enough to know I was 50% of that toxic relationship. We don't place blame here, okay? But I would never have plans because I would be dating these toxic guys. The bar would be so low. And so my entire life, I've been used to either getting a text right before and be like, I guess I have New Year's plans or just not. And I think in a way I actually thought that was how life went.

You just never know what's going to happen and you'd never have plans. My life changed about two years ago when I met this man called. And that's my boyfriend. And he had plans. my god I feel like I'm in the Grey's Anatomy episode where Meredith Grey is like talking about the vet that she's dating and she's like and Finn has plans and I like plans if you don't watch Grey's Anatomy you go watch it it's the best show in the world but anyway so it was two years ago about and August is my birthday month oh god I don't want to be one of those girls it's is my birthday month. Oh God, I don't want to be one of those girls. It's like my birthday month. That's not what I mean. That's not what I mean.

I more so just mean like that's the month in which I was born. So my boyfriend and I kind of met in like June. And I remember we started hitting it off and I went back to New York City and he texted me from LA saying, I would love to come out and take you to the Hamptons for your birthday. To which I was like, yeah, sure. Sure. See you there, buddy. Sure. I would love to see you. Bring your bathing suit. Bring your trunks. The week before he was supposed to come out, he texted me and he was like hey I am looking at flights does this flight work for you if I come in at this time like will you be at your apartment I replied to that text message and I said what to which he then picked up the phone like an adult and called me

and says why did you just what what are you doing like what are you doing and I was like what do you mean he's like I asked you if you would want to go to the Hamptons with me for your birthday I'm taking you to the Hamptons why are you acting like you don't know that we made this plan and I said I just didn't think you actually like meant it like I and then I started to spiral because we started to get close and I was in a lot of therapy at the time and I was like listen I'm gonna be real with you I never expect people to make plans and actually stick to them and then as that came out of my mouth, I got so insecure because I realized how like much of a skeptic I sounded like. Like when people make plans with me, I don't think they're going to follow through. To which then this was like the hottest early moment. My boyfriend then goes to say,

Alex, I promise you that when I make plans with people, I never flake. I may be late, but I will never flake or cancel on you last minute. That's just not how I run my life. And that's not the type of person I am. He is a grown ass man. I am a child. Oh, okay. Like amazing. Yeah. Like can't wait. See you then. Right when we hang up the phone, I open my notes on my phone. I write his name, the date at the top, and I verbatim write exactly what he said to me. So every time I had doubt between the week of waiting till he got here, I kept opening the notes pad to remind myself. He said he doesn't cancel on people. He will not flake. He will be here. He's taking me to the Hamptons. And I'm not proud of how many times I had to look at that notes throughout the week when I was waiting for him to come. And turns out he showed up. Guys, he literally showed up and we went to the Hamptons

for my birthday. Like I had plans. And so that was the beginning of when I realized like I don't have to live in a way that is so tumultuous and rocky and on edge and not knowing what's going to happen like I was choosing that life because I was choosing certain men that I knew were not going to commit in any possible way and I was also doing the toxic dance myself back to them and what a refreshing moment when he got off the elevator from Los Angeles and said we're going to the fucking Hamptons baby baby. Now, let me tell you what I was used to and why I was so damaged. I was supposed to go visit this guy that I was talking to, very toxic. And I was going to go visit him in his hometown. We had been talking for months.

We had hung out before we had hooked up before the whole thing. And I could tell something was like a little off, though, that week. I wasn't sure if it was because I posted cocaine on my Snapchat story and that was a bad look for him because he's an athlete. But I wasn't sure like what the vibe was, but he kept saying like, I can't wait for you to come. I can't wait for you to come. He texts me two days before I'm supposed to get on a flight and this is going to be my 4th of July also. I was spending 4th of July with him. Hey, I'm so sorry. I just found out there's a leak in my house in XYZ, like a different state. And I have to go there and I have to like attend to the leak in my house. And so you can't come here. This guy is very rich and famous and successful and all things.

I said, don't you have literally a house manager that watches that house? Yeah, but it's my house and I need to take responsibility. So I'm flying there and I need to attend to the leak and I can't see you. Can you imagine someone giving you the excuse they can't see you because there's a leak in their house? I can. Now, I mentioned earlier, this is a 50-50 situation, right? And so I remember back in Boston Boston I was dating my hockey player um at BU and that's when I had met the Red Sox guy and it was it was I think it was New Year's we I went with him to this bar or this club for New Year's my hockey player boyfriend and the Red Sox guy ended up showing up there with a different group and so I just like backed my ass up I'm not feeling too good I just went to the other side of

the club I literally acted like I was leaving I told him I'm not feeling too good I think I'm gonna go he's like it's New Year's Eve I went to the other side of the club hey and the kid was like texting me he's like at the end of the night he's like you realize that you moved about like 17 feet to the left of me and I know that he didn't leave the club it wasn't great it made me realize you should be a better person than that but at the time all I cared about was where's the best party and where's the best dick and that's what it's like in college and you know what I think back and like even though I'm like you can't maybe see me but I'm blushing a little because I'm like oh I'm embarrassed like why was I an asshole or like by the other side of someone ditching me I really don't regret the toxic

cancellations in those moments yeah they may have hurt them or me but I look back and I'm like you know what I'm so happy I did all that what is it what does my mom always say you got it out of your system that's not what my mom says that's what everyone says right you got it out of your system but I do actually feel that way and so if you're watching this and you're in college sweetie ditch him fucking ditch him you get out there which one's got the bigger schlong which one's got the bigger dick game and which one has better plans and don't have any shame in canceling on someone if they have bad fucking plans that night okay the point is is go all the way back to the story I told in the beginning of my boyfriend in the Hamptons I quite literally when he made plans with me and he was confirming them

like triple checking before he gets on the plane I was like what like that's how trained I was to engage in the toxic and it almost I had to like reshift my brain as to like wow this person is being healthy and this is a complete different side of things that I haven't experienced. But I wouldn't have recognized how healthy it was had I not gone through the toxic and the bad. We're here now. That's the point. We're here now. My boyfriend and I have plans. And I'm excited to tell you guys about my summer plans because I have never gone to a different country with a man. That's a lie. That's a lie. Anyways, my boyfriend and I are going to Europe this summer, which I'm very excited about. And I have plans. Speaking of plans, I have plans to use the bathroom, get dressed for the day. So should we go?

You know, in talking about all these plans, it made me think about my plan last year to go to Hawaii. If you guys don't remember, I had an episode where I told you guys, I'm going to Hawaii with my boyfriend. I'm so excited. And then randomly the next episode, quite literally, I'm pretty sure it was that quick of a turnaround. I said, oh guys, like, yeah, I'm not going to Hawaii. You're not going to see the bikini photos. I just have a lot of things going on with the work and I had to cancel that was a lie I don't lie to you um but I lied because my boyfriend and I were in like a huge fight and I have told you guys that when my boyfriend and I get in fights we've now created like this new boundary system what a concept and we basically need to resolve the fight on our own

before I go and podcast about it to the world. And so that was like one of the first moments where I was respectful towards our relationship and I didn't exploit our fight right away. And so I just told you guys, Hey, I'm actually not going to go because of work, which I know a lot of you guys were like, wait, what? We were excited for the Hawaii content the asshole pictures trust me so was I but the truth is is we actually didn't go to Hawaii because we got in a huge fucking fight my boyfriend had planned this whole Hawaii trip for us and we were in like a really stressful point in our relationship and we were going through something very specific that we just like could not resolve together and so it was like a few days before the Hawaii trip I sat him down I love how I say I sat him down it wasn't as calm as that sounds I sat him down I told him sweetie

nope I was like I'm not going to Hawaii with you I refuse to go to Hawaii with you right now we're not in a good place and I don't want to sit on a fucking beach with you and drink a goddamn pina colada and pretend like everything's okay and it was a blowout fucking fight because we could not get any of our money back it had surpassed the time where you could get anything reimbursed but I was like I understand that, this is a huge decision, but like you should go. If anything, that's still so toxic. You should go. Yeah, you should go, but I'm not going to go. But I decided to cancel the trip and it was a huge fucking issue. His family knew my family knew like our therapist knew it was like, Jesus Christ, she's canceling the trip. What turned out happening though, was I got kudos for canceling that trip because it was like,

we were not in a place to go and like romantically be in this like luxurious place and just like fucking and on the beach and like lubing each other up with sunscreen like no we were in a really bad rough patch of our relationship early on everyone I'm sure everyone's been on it we're like you're on a trip with a partner and you're miserable and there's nothing worse than that because you're in an environment that's so saturated that you're supposed to be having fun. You're supposed to be having sex. You're supposed to be romantic and loving life. The juxtaposition of like the environment versus like how you're actually feeling is almost amplified in those moments. And it makes you even more depressed and more upset about your relationship. So the reason I canceled those plans was a little bit of old Alex being like, I don't, I don't want to go. But I think a part of me

holstered that like positive therapy energy and was like, this is not a good thing to do if we're not in a good place. And old me, little gold digger me would have been like free vacation. Let me get my Shein bikinis. Like, let's go.'s go not this time girls I canceled a very luxurious trip because I knew in my heart we were not going to enjoy ourselves and it was not what was best for our relationship and my boyfriend hated me for it but as time went on it was a very sensitive subject and I can now finally talk about it because we then did go to Hawaii together once we resolved all those issues we quite literally had the best vacation I've ever had with a partner. So see, sometimes waiting brings something even better than going

in the immediate moment. Okay. Okay. Hey guys, welcome to the car series. We are going now to get a coffee because I can't function without a coffee at this point in my life. And I need some egg bites or something to eat. Okay, we need to open the gate. Oh, it's not opening. Hold on. I want it to be a smooth like open the gate. Oh, here we go. We'll try to just pretend that didn't happen i do know oh seat belt first uh i'm directionally challenged okay so oh my god the gate closed oh my god it took me to um wait am i like okay oh my god the gate is closing usually it gives me like the little backup view so I can like fucking see what I'm doing. But like, apparently not today. I'm just going to like run over. Hello? Okay. No one died in the process of this exit. Jesus Christ. That was really scary. Okay. So we're driving down Los Angeles. Uh, I love how I

say Los Angeles guys. I've lived here for now two years and I have no fucking idea ever where I'm going. Oh my God, guys, I'm coming up on my, um, hair salon. I'll show you guys my hair salon. Should we go say hi to Jacob? Okay. So we are on our way i'm gonna go to starbucks and i'm really hungry i haven't eaten anything today and it's 11 o'clock so we're gonna go to the drive-thru it shall be a good time guys i think birth control makes me not want to fuck anymore i went to my gyno and i quite literally said to her what has happened to my sex drive I am celibate like I don't need to have sex and I think my boyfriend for a little bit was like what is going on and I'm like I don't like to have sex anymore like I I'm just not a sexual being and it's not true

because I love to have sex I would like to have sex often and all of a sudden so to give you guys context I switched my birth controls I went on birth control for my acne and when I was in New York my gyno in New York gave me this birth control and my skin was so clear on this birth control then I got to Los Angeles and I got a new gyno and like the first day I showed up she was like sweetie this birth control gives you blood clots she was like so would you rather no pimples but blood clots or like maybe just like no blood clots and I was like honestly no pimples we'll risk it with the blood clots oh fuck okay so she put me on this new birth control and I went on this like two months ago my sex drive is non-existent zilch zero no moisture no fantasies not even masturbating alone because you know sometimes you're like oh I

could like get off on my vibrator but like sex right now is too crazy no what I realized through the past couple weeks and because listen I understand that there are some people that are like well I have to stay on birth control like I cannot go off of it when I've been going through this period of like, why am I not literally not horny at all? I feel like the least sexual being. I found that women, you're going to fucking relate to this. Ready? You are getting close to nighttime and you're literally thinking, oh my God, like we should

be having sex. We haven't had sex in like four days. Like we should be having sex we haven't had sex in like four days like we should be having sex and so you literally start to like get anxiety about like wait I don't want to have sex but we should be having sex and he's gonna look at me and what do I do this is what I found number one if you have a partner that you can be like babe I'm sorry I'm not in the mood like I don't know what's going on with me that is the first option but the truth is like in my soul I know I want to have sex but this drug is making me feel like I don't want to have sex but I've never had like a less amount

of sex in the like than I am right now so I knew something was wrong so this is what I did the act of initiating is so hard sometimes you need to like push yourself through that moment of like oh i don't want to have sex like i'm not turned on give it a second because what i found is a lot of times once i'm having sex i'm enjoying it i'm having the best fucking time it's just getting into it is what i'm like i don't want to have i don't want to have it oh that actually kind of okay that that's actually okay even though this birth control is still fucking me up like i'm still kind of enjoying it i've definitely been using my vibrator more during sex and like relying on that but like overall it's the act of initiating that feels so daunting and like like it feels like a chore which i used to always tell people like it shouldn't

feel like a chore and i'm now experiencing what i've always said it shouldn't feel like and so I would say if you can get yourself past that first initial fuck I'm not in the mood I found that once I have sex trying to keep that consistency going because when you go without sex for a while baby we can go a long time without sex right you kind of get comfortable you're used to it you're like I don't even need sex so I would say is if you can allow yourself to try to consistently let yourself have sex and like go there for me it became more enjoyable because my body was like used to it I'm like oh I want to have sex even though the drug is making me feel like I don't it's almost like the routine of like oh I want to have sex I don't know it's like it's hard because I don't want to get pregnant but I also want to have my sex drive back and so I'm going to talk to my doctor about it I like I you almost

feel like something's wrong with you like you're like why like what what what is happening and especially because my boyfriend has like a high sex drive and we had such a great sex life for a while I think he at first was like is something wrong and I was like babe I switched birth controls and so he's like okay I get it like like do you want me to come like let me know what you need me to do I'm here for you so I'm like you jerk off and I'll just go read a book and take a nap and take a weed gummy and go to bed we're at Starbucks yeah I hope that birth control thing didn't make you guys depressed it should be hopeful though because I truly I will tell you guys about my experience and like what my doctor says. And I've never been through anything like this before.

And I've had friends tell me the minute they went off the birth control, they quite literally were like, whoa, I want to fuck all the time. And when you hear that, you're like, I want it. I want in on that, too. Count me in, coach. Like, I want to be a part of that club too i don't even know what i want all righty thank you so much for your patience this should be appreciated what can i get for you today hello um could i get an iced coffee with oat milk let me have a check to see if i have oat milk unfortunately Whoa. Okay. Okay. We can do almond. We can get through almond. Um, no, thank you. And then may i have the bacon egg bites

should i get a cake pop oh my god can i have a cake pop which one the pink one no that's it thank you so much i had no intention to get a cake pop, and then I just saw the picture of the cake pop, and I was like... Let me find your iced coffee real quick. Thank you. Here's your card. I'll be right back. Thank you very much. Ma'am, could you sign a release to be on my podcast?

Yeah, you're on the call. Her daddy podcast. Thank you so much. Have a good one. it's so good i used to drink almond milk oat milk all the way baby it's so much better and i haven't had almond milk in a minute let me try this it doesn't even touch oat milk there's an almond shortage and apparently now there's an oat shortage okay so i'm going back to the dad pad if you guys don't know what the dad pad is that's what i call basically the caller daddy headquarters that's where i film all my episodes that's where i edit my episodes

that's where my team comes in every day our studios in West Hollywood come find us please don't goodbye has the person that you are hooking up with ever asked you on a date? If the answer is no, that means that this person is not your boyfriend. It means that that is the person that you're hooking up with. And that's great. But you need to recognize that. And when I say you need to recognize that, I mean you need to recognize this is not your boyfriend.

This is not your girlfriend. And they only want to hook up with you do not avoid the signs do not pretend you can't see and you're just like I going in blindly like why aren't they they're not taking you on dates they're not treating you like their girlfriend they haven't asked you to be their girlfriend you're not their girlfriend you are the vagina that they put their penis inside of and then send home and they probably don't even call you an uber unless they're a nice fuck buddy then that's good to know but why am I bringing this up two instances so one of my boyfriend's friends we were hanging out with and then also my brother he's gonna kill me I don't know if he wants me to say this but sorry I'm calling you out

but my brother and both of these men were talking about how they were having so much fun great girls that they were hooking up with good vibes but both of them had a girl that wanted to take it and progress it farther and they were so clear with that person that's not what I'm looking for and both of those women proceeded to send text messages longer than the length I'm showing you my fingers are holding up asking basically why what's wrong I don't okay so let me take it a step back one of the guys not my brother we were on a walk with our dogs and he was talking about how he's talking to this girl they have been hooking up for three months, but like three months, it's like we see each other once a week. Right. And she always goes to his house. He's like a rich dude. He's got a nice

house. He's like a little older. She's a little younger. She always goes over. She's always the one that texts him. What are you doing tonight? Can I come over? Do you want to hang out? Totally fine. Love someone that's aggressive with it, wants what she wants and gets it right. After three months of doing this, he's been talking to other people. She knew that she asked him, Hey, can I see you more? Like it's been three months. I would like to start to like see each other more regularly. Love maybe in the past I would be like, why did you say that? Nope. I disagree with that version of what I used to think like if you want something out of a relationship and when I say relationship I mean two people involved in something together no matter how casual or intense if you want something out of a relationship you should ask

for it because why the fuck would you waste your time you want to know does the other person want to reciprocate that so she asks if they can see each other he calls her and he's like hey I just want to be so real with you I'm not really looking for anything serious I have so much fun with you I love what we're doing but like I'm not looking to progress it any farther than like what we're doing which is just like hanging chilling hooking up he hangs up she was like oh okay kind of taken off guard proceeds to send him a 15 paragraph outline thesis of how she's so hurt that he wrote off their three months in like a five minute phone conversation and she doesn't understand why and she feels a little blindsided and she just wants the opportunity to spend a little bit more time and like they already get along so like we should hang out more right like that's the natural progress and he's showing me

this on the walk genuinely being like I'm so confused because and here is what I want to talk about today this man has been so so careful about the signs and the gestures that he's made towards this woman to make it very clear he has never brought her on a date in his life. They met through a dating app. This woman has never hung out with this man outside of the four walls that they hang out, which is his bedroom. She has never met any of his friends. He has never taken her to a work event. He has never asked her to like hang out aside from the occasional like hey what are you up to tonight and it's like a Wednesday and it's at nine o'clock and so I think when I heard this I felt really number one not annoyed with him which usually I

immediately want to blame the guy because I'm like well are you leading her on are you taking her to dates when I heard this I felt bad because I was like, oh my God, I wish I could tell this girl. Like if you're ever going to send a paragraph to a hookup, stop, stop yourself and give yourself the 24 hour rule. Would you send that in 24 hours later? Probably not. You're probably having a glass of wine. You're emotional. You want to like act like he's your boyfriend. He's not. I think what I wanted to just remind everyone is, because I know when I was single, I needed this reminder. It's like, you cannot be blind to the cues

that someone is giving you in the dating game. If someone is showing you all of the signs that this is just a hookup, you have every right to ask for more. But the minute that they shut it down and say, no, oh wait, I'm really cozy and comfortable with what we're doing. That's it. And now you can make a choice. How empowering does that feel? They gave you the answer and now it's on you. Are you okay to continue what you're

doing? Or do you want to move on and find someone that wants something more serious? Totally amazing. But think about this, begging someone. She's begging this man to like see what she sees to hang out more. That's technically rejection of him saying, no, I don't want that. So let's also normalize. It's totally okay to be upset off of something a hookup says to you. Well, he's not my boyfriend. Like some people may feel ashamed. Like, I don't want to be upset. And I know he's not my boy. No, it's okay. That's a human being rejecting you. That's like a normal feeling. But I would say before you go send a long drawn out text message, maybe take a hot minute for yourself to decompress and think about, is it really about him that I'm upset about? Or am I projecting

something? Maybe you really want a boyfriend. So we need to stop feeling like embarrassed when we're rejected. You made a really ballsy, great play play I want to hang out with you he said no he doesn't want to keep hanging out with you more than what you're doing take the fucking hint so let me now talk about the side with my brother so I'm just trying to give you like the male intel here daddy gang so my brother came to visit LA and he is like recently single he had like a semi-long relationship like a little over a year broke it off and now he's single and he's back on the dating apps and he came to LA and we were just talking about how he's been like going on a lot of dates when you're on the dating apps the minute you go on a date and you find someone like kind of normal that you're like vibing with

you want to just stop there and my brother was like I want to stop there just in terms of this is some cool chick that I want to hook up with and hang out with on weekends and stuff like I found a cool chick that's the goal right to find someone that's a good hookup but he doesn't want a relationship with this person he just wants to hook up with them and so my brother has found like a couple chicks that are like so cool so fun but when my brother was I'm he's gonna I don't know if I'm allowed to say this when he was coming out to LA the girl he had quite literally gone on like to hang out with at that point was like you're going to LA so I'm not gonna see you for a really long time and my brother was like we've known each other for three weeks and we've hung out three times at night inebriated like so I think immediately my brother was like whoa like

is this girl gonna be clingy and should I just end it now so one I would just like to say we can also take from that like hey maybe sometimes you're trying to be cute like oh I'm not gonna see you don't do that that early on because it can freak people out especially when they just got out of a relationship and are not looking for anything serious the other thing my brother was saying was like he's having a hard time he's such a great guy my brother is such a nice guy and he's so respectful of women and I can tell he's like I like to like have a little bit of an emotional connection which can we not all? Having sex with someone that you are emotionally connected to is 10 times better than just like a random fuck. So he's hanging out with them. He's inviting them if he's at the bar to like come meet up.

But he's like, I can feel some of them getting ready to ask that question of like, so should we hang out more? You can feel it. You can feel when it's coming because that person keeps kind of like so should we hang out more you can feel it you can feel when it's coming because that person keeps kind of like lightly poking at the topic and my brother was like i need advice because i i'm not an asshole and i don't want to lead these girls on and this is what i told him never take this woman on a proper date do not dare to even be like do you want to grab a bite before we go to the bar nope you are never ingesting food with this woman unless you're at the bar and there's a bunch of peanuts on the bar and you're eating the fucking peanuts or it's like late late night right before you go back to your place to fuck and you're like let's get a hot dog from this bodega that's it you're never fucking taking this

woman on a date part two of this advice that I gave him was make a very conscious effort to not make plans in advance with these people. And what I mean by that is if you know your friend's birthday party is next Saturday and you're like, I want a chick to be there. Like I want to like have her there and then like we'll have sex later that night. Nope. You can know that in your head, but you're asking her the day of because that's a date. If you plan something with her and in your head but you're asking her the day of because that's a date if you plan something with her and in your mind you're like oh we're just going to be boozing and hanging and drinking there is a way that someone's going to take that the wrong way and go shopping for an outfit maybe get their makeup done like every time you schedule something it's the minute of

it's annoying for him because he's like well I want her to come no but if you want to play by you don't want to lead her on then you need need to act that way. And then I think also being very inconsistent at times, even if you're bored on that Monday and you just saw each other on Sunday and like you want to have sex and hang out, maybe you're going to jerk it instead of having a woman come over because the consistency of like night after night no because that then gets in her head of like then what is this okay so now I want to talk about early in maybe even on the first hangout when someone says I just want to be really up front I'm not looking for anything serious I know people who have said that to the core that mean it and I know people who have said that to the core that mean it. And I know people who have said that, me back in college, and I didn't mean a single fucking

second of it. And it was a full game I was playing. I think we need to kind of break that down because I'll talk about myself for a minute. When I would do that in college, it was specific to the man I was speaking to. I always did it to a man that was like more successful than me and older than me because naturally they would look at me and be like, oh, she's this young college girl. She just wants a relationship. And so I would usually not on the first time, but I would usually say stuff of like when

they were being super mushy towards me or something like after sex I'd be like okay don't go falling in love relax like I want to be clear I'm not looking for anything I love what we're doing right now and this is like great and then the guy would be like what like and they would take it as an ego hit but as I got older I realized that was working in the immediate moment but why would I want to play a game and trick someone? Because at the end of the day, then when some of these people then started to like me, I didn't even know if it was because

I played a mind game on them to make them want something that they knew they couldn't have or do they genuinely fucking like me? So I would say if you guys are using that as a way to like play the game and like get in his mind, stop, stop. Because it's just not gonna help you in the long run to

actually differentiate like does he even like you or is he just attracted to like the chase and like wanting to get something that he can't get on the other side of actually being genuine and being like hey I just got about a relationship like I'm not looking for anything serious to give you guys an example I told my brother not to say that this time around. Last time he was single, he used to say it. And I was like, that's totally fine. This time around, I told him, why don't you not say that? And why don't instead you insinuate where you stand in the hookup by your actions, i.e. what I just said. you never take them on a date only hang out with them when you're having them come over to hook up or you're meeting up randomly like at a bar and it's

like mid you're at the bar and you text them to come meet up so then you guys can hang out and then go back and have sex and you are never introducing them like formally to your friends to your family etc etc through those little things you can do that is showing to someone I'm not looking for anything serious I don't see you in the daylight I don't even know what you look like with no makeup on sweetie like you know what I mean listen everyone listening is going to be on one side or the other you're single and you're in the dating game right now and you have a fuck buddy or a hookup buddy right and maybe you're the person that's wanting to send the paragraph text and you're the person that's like, I want to be more. I always go to his house.

I do want to kind of take things. At least I'd love to like get a dinner paid for. Like, I don't want to be even his girlfriend. Like, could he at least take me to dinner? If you want those things and he's been clear he doesn't, then you again need to reevaluate. Maybe this isn't the hookup buddy for you. It's really not on them. Sending a big

paragraph to someone after they quite literally deny you, you're just never going to end up happy. I always have said, why would you want to be with someone that doesn't want to be with you? You are going to be way better off finding someone that's in simpatico with you in terms of where they're at in their dating game and their wants. Ladies and gentlemen, if you feel like you're that person, I promise you they're not gonna wake up in two years and wanna be your boyfriend. I've had so many friends that go through that and then they end it.

And the person that was saying, I don't want anything serious, two weeks later starts dating someone. And what happens is you leave being like, wait, they're in a serious relationship. It's because they kindly were saying like, I don't see this other than like great sex great vibes but then they met someone they actually wanted to be in a relationship with and you shouldn't take that the wrong way you should take that as

thank god I didn't waste another minute trying to force something that wasn't there also I would want to leave you guys with this like summer is coming and if you're someone right now you're like I've been in a pandemic. I want a fucking boyfriend. I'm done with hot girl summer. We need to like retire hot girl summer also. But like people are like hot girl summer. No, I just want to be in a relationship and I want to have plans every weekend and every week.

And like, I just want a partner. I'm so sick of being single. Like I'm done with it. I hear you. The goal is to always find a partner, right? That is what we all want in life. But I would say, well, maybe chill. Try if you can to channel a little bit of the other side I was talking about of the person that's like content being in that hookup zone and content with like

not moving forward. Because I think when you try to like rewire that side of your brain a little bit to be like, no pressure. This person that I'm seeing does not need to be my husband. I'm going to learn something from this experience. And then maybe I'll take something from that and then find someone after this relationship. Be easy on yourself and have lower stakes, not low expectations, but just lower stakes and just be easy on yourself. Because what ends up happening, I find is when I got to that place, when I was single. Literally my energy then attracted more people that I was like into because I wasn't so high strung and I wasn't so like on the dates, like freaking out, like, oh, this person isn't for me.

And it's like, chill, they will come. Everyone, you're going to find that person. It just takes time. And the more stressed you are about it, I truly believe you like repel good energy. Chill, have a fucking margarita this summer, be open to experiences and eventually the good experience will come. But first you got to go through the bad. Okay. So I was just working. I was prepping for, I don't

know. I bet that will be uploaded right now, but I'm, I'm prepping for two interviews. I'm prepping for my Kiki Palmer interview and I'm also prepping for my interview. So anyways, I was prepping for my Kiki Palmer interview and I'm also prepping for my interview. So anyways, I was prepping for those, writing questions, trying to figure out what I want to ask them. And now I just got a really exciting call. I've always said I have never pictured getting married, not a wedding, nothing. But I've always like pictured having a home one day. I didn't anticipate I would be 27 and buying my first home. It's so fucking exciting. But anyway, so I did not understand anything about real estate. So my boyfriend and I like closed on the house last month and the process is so fucking long and daunting. We're on the phone with business

managers and real estate people and the banks and you're getting fucking inspections on like the fireplace and the fucking floor and the doors and every crevice of every fucking thing. And I thought, I don't know about you guys, but I know what it's like to just sign a lease for an apartment. You sign your name and you're in, right? Well, not with a house. And so this thing takes forever. And so I've been waiting to be able to like officially say like we have the keys to our home and today I can officially say we just officially closed escrow all the inspections everything and we got the keys to the home and so I just got like my little garage clicker and my keys and I've been up there a

couple times like my family was just in town I showed them the house but every time we've gone to the house we have to have the real estate agents come with us because we don't own the house yet. We're not allowed to have keys, whatever. So finally I could go to the house and be alone. Let's go. Let's go to the house today. And I want to bring you guys with me because I'm so excited. I know some people are going to be there. I think my boyfriend's there with these like contractors. Really the only reason I'm going is to look at my closet again because I'm I officially got my dream closet. So, daddy gang, do you want to come to my new house with me? Let's go. And now we're fucking

here. This is my new closet. It definitely feels very surreal to give you guys context. So I just came upstairs. A bunch of people are downstairs, friends, some family, my boyfriend's downstairs, Henry is here with me, and they are like popping champagne and partying. But I wanted to kind of step away from everyone being downstairs and come up here and just kind of have like a moment with you guys. And I brought some champagne because if you know me you know that I'm so excited to fill this motherfucking place with hoodies everyone's like Alex that's literally painting my heart like no bitch get a wardrobe that is my wardrobe fuck you so a couple things one I want to pop fucking champagne with you guys and celebrate this year in general for call her daddy has been monumental and you guys are a huge fucking part of that I cannot thank you guys enough for supporting everything all the

different directions the show has gone in and so I thought I have nothing in this closet and I want to document it with you guys that the first fucking thing that will be hung up in this goddamn closet is a call her daddy hoodie how fucking great so I brought a call her daddy hoodie I am unwell and I'm going to hang it up and we're going to leave it here until I officially move in to the new house and I fill this shit with all call her daddy merch. But for now, let's christen this bitch with some champagne and a goddamn hoodie. I'm gonna get like emotional right now. What the fuck? Yes, this is fucking crazy.

But the fact that I get to do this and it's such a tangible moment because it's so connected to Call Her Daddy. Like Call Her Daddy got me this closet and Call Her daddy is you guys so the fact that the first fucking apparel that's going into my dream closet is a goddamn motherfucking call her daddy hoodie yeah this is this is pretty fucking sweet shout out to all of the daddy gang my haters are screaming right now okay here, here we go. Let's hang this baby up.

There she goes. Daddy gang, it's time to pop some fucking champagne. Cheers to many more years of Call Her Daddy. Cheers to a lot of fucking memories being made in this closet I wish you guys could like be here but I hope you guys feel like you are kind of here in spirit because cheers daddy gang I love you I will see you fuckers next Wednesday I love you guys goodbye