Cameron Hanes - Keep Hammering Collective - KHC 107 - Mrs. Hanes

Episode Date: January 6, 2025

Join us for a discussion with Cam’s most requested guest and wife, Mrs. Hanes.  Follow along: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/cameronrhanes Twitter: https://twitter.com/cameronhanes Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/camhanes/ Website: https://www.cameronhanes.com Thank you to our sponsors: GoHunt: https://gohunt.com/ use code CAM when you sign up for $50 towards the gear shop + 10% off the GoHunt store Sig Sauer: https://www.sigsauer.com/ use code CAM10 for 10% off optics Black Rifle Coffee: https://www.blackriflecoffee.com/ Use code KEEPHAMMERING for 20% your first order MTN OPS Supplements: https://mtnops.com/ Use code KEEPHAMMERING for 20% off and Free Shipping Hoyt: http://bit.ly/3Zdamyv use code CAM for 10% off Ketone IQ: https://www.ketone.com/Cam use code CAM for 30% off your first subscription Timestamps: 0:00:00 Intro: Why Tracey Married Cam 0:03:08 What Changes After You Become a Mother 0:06:57 Growing up with 6 Siblings 0:11:44 The Impact of Death & Faith in God 0:24:13 Conversations with Roy Roth 0:29:03 The Hanes’ Boys Support for Tracey 0:35:26 Raising Caring Boys 0:39:45 Do Mothers Make You Weak? 0:41:10 Wins & Failures as Parents 0:46:58 The Key to Supporting Each Others 0:56:11 Best & Worst Part About Being Married to Cam 0:59:52 Cam & Tracey’s Biggest Accomplishment 01:02:06 Cam’s Dad’s Impact on Tracey 01:07:32 Outro: Tracey’s Message to Each of Her Kids

Every step I take, I move my truth. Every time they tell me stop, I use. Every comment hate that makes my feel, gather up my energy, and boom. I hear them talking, saying the way that I move it's so reckless. That is a part of my mind I've been blessed with. Giving my blood so I am relentless. All right, this is a Keep Hammering Collective, and I have one of the most highly requested guests, I think of all time. I'm Miss Tracy Haynes.

How are you? Good. Good. So it goes, Goggins, Goggins and Rogan are one and two, and then you for what people want to see. I don't know. Why is that? I don't know. Well, first of all, let's get this out of the way. Whatever you say can and will be used against you in a court of law. Okay. What I want to know is, I mean, obviously you married me for money. Oh, yes. It was all about the money.

And how does that feel now? I feel really cheap. So why did you marry me? Are you serious? Yeah. Yeah. I don't know. We're just young and stupid. No, I'm sorry.

How young? No, just young and I don't. I don't know. I thought you were really funny and I liked your company. You'd probably love to hear this. Go on. Go on. Go on. There's got to be more. Yeah. Well, we worked at the same place and you were kind of obnoxious at first. You would always ask me what time it was. Not always. Yes, you would. All the time. Go buy me. And you'd go by on that, what was that thing? It was like a tugger. Yeah, you'd go like. So I would pull.

You were so obvious, you'd stop me, go, do you know what time it is? And you'd look at it, I'd be like, I don't. That was not obvious. It was super obvious. Super smooth. So I was on a tugger that used to pull empty bins around that people would throw a cardboard in, and then I would haul them back and crush them and make cardboard bales. Yes.

That was, I was a, I was a cardboard bail technician. That's what I went to school for. That's true. Mm-hmm. And so anyway, that kind of went on for a while. Mm-hmm. And then finally you did end up asking if I wanted to go to have lunch. Taco Bell.

Taco Bell. And so we did. Two crisp tacos, nachos, large moundo. Yes. I would eat that right now. I know. Actually, that would be my favorite dinner if I could have it right now. Um, okay. So I think what people want to know, what's it like? What's it like? What's it like? What changed when you became a mother?

Well. Because I think people know your kids. Yeah. Uh, I just everything changes. I know that sounds kind of cliche, but it really is true. It's like you stop thinking about yourself and you can't believe that, you've brought this child in the world that looks, it's so amazing, you know. I mean, you just, you bring this child in the world, and then everything is the focus on taking care of the baby and just loving the child. And I don't know, it's just, it just changes who you are and all your priorities change. And it's not so much about you and, you know, what you're going to do, but more about like how am I going to raise this kid into being a loving person. And I don't know, I was just thinking like how important it is to, you know, start off right.

I know that everybody gets the right start in a family because you're always dealing with all these people that just come from different back, and it just kind of depends on how your parents raised you and then you get together with another person and then usually those things that you were raised with come out in that relationship. But I would say that I'm super fortunate. My parents were not perfect, but they were so, they were so, both my parents came from actually broken families. And then my dad, alcoholic father, never there had a really good mom that raised him and then my mom's family her side of the family her dad her dad was a alcoholic and uh it was really hard and then her mom was super loving but when my mom and

dad got together uh it wasn't peaches and cream but they they came together and it was just like my dad was so good to my mom like so good to her uh he loved his mom he loved his mom mom so much too, but it was like such a reflection on how he loved his mom. But, um, and I, you know, it's, it's not like it was just perfect the whole time, but I'm just saying like my dad was really, he was, uh, just a loving, he was loving father, but he was also, when you have seven kids, gone working a lot. And, you know, and so mom was home, you know, raising all of us kids, but, uh, so she had seven kids in 10 years. That's busy.

Yeah. So like a lot of people say that, you know, you come from a broken home, then you're more inclined to face those same type of challenges, you know, like it's a reoccurring theme. And but it doesn't like your parents, you said, came from a broken home, but then they were, you know. Yeah. I mean, they just, they didn't really.

They didn't want to, they didn't want to make the same mistakes their parents did, I guess. I guess. I don't know how they, you know, I don't really know how they kind of did that, honestly, because I just, I just, again, I think there was such a, there was at least one solid parent in that relationship on both sides of my mom and dads, you know. Yeah, it was the mom because dads are awful. Not all dads.

That's what I heard. But, yeah, dads can be. So me. On some water? Yeah, I do. Okay. Yeah, so growing up, One of seven kids, you're the youngest.

Yes. What was that like? Thank you. That was really fun growing up in a big family, not all the time, because you'd get teased a lot. Mm-hmm. And picked on. Yes. And, you know, like the, so it was the four older kids.

It was Kelly, Carla, Mark, Christy. So that's the four older kids. And then it was the twins, Annie, and Amy, and then it was me. So the three youngest ones were we were a little bit more at the same age. Yeah, hung out more. Only like two years apart. And then so the older ones were actually really cool. I mean, except, you know, we just, the older ones just were so much older, you know.

Hard to have a connection. Kind of, yeah. Kind of had to wait down the road to feel a little bit more like you were, could understand each other. Kind of like Tanner and Taryn, you know, it took a while. but now they're like kind of like getting to be more friends, you know. So, but more so it was like Truitt and Tanner mostly. And then when Tanner left, it was like Truitt and Taryn. Yeah, they were buddies.

Yeah, and then they were buddies. So I was more like with twins, hung out with the twins more. And yeah, and then down the road as I got older, I got really close to my brother. and he was he was such a nice guy and he just really I don't know we just hit it off

our personalities were kind of the same in a lot of ways but anyway I got to go and move down there to L.A. when I was 20 and I lived there with him for not that long

it was probably six months I don't, it was roughly that long but just coming from a small town and then just going to to LA and I'd visited there, but then moving there's a totally different thing. So it was just, I was kind of wanting to come back home. I didn't like the busy.

Yeah. And he was an actor and trying to make it in Hollywood type thing. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's just, I don't know. I just got kind of sick of the, I mean, it was just like everywhere you'd go was 45 minutes to get somewhere everywhere, you know.

Just can't run down to the store. You'd have to be in the traffic lights for 45 minutes before you get, you know. Yeah. Get there or whatever. So I was just kind of ready to come back home and just kind of have just that easier, you know. Yeah, smaller, slower pace. Yeah, I mean, I don't know, miss my parents, you know, I mean, have a good relationship with mom and dad and everything. So they're still here.

Yeah. Thank God. I know. They're still here. So that's great. It's pretty crazy to think. think they've had seven kids and now they've outlived two of them. Yeah.

You know, and that's such a, for a parent, there's no, nothing harder. I mean, you're not supposed to go, your kids aren't supposed to go before you. Well, that's what it feels like for sure. I mean, my, some work died in 1997 and, and then from cancer. and then my sister Kelly just died. It'll be a year January 15th of 2024. So, yeah, it was pretty rough. It's really hard, especially though when your parents get older

and then they have to deal with that, all that. It's just that grief. Yeah. It's, I mean, it's really hard. We're not the only ones who have gone through these things. I know that everybody, I mean, I don't know where I heard this saying. It was just like people hurt. It's like people who, there's people who hurt and there's people who are going to hurt.

And it's just, it's like you can't get around it. No, you're not avoiding loss and pain. And it's just normally it's you lose your parents, you know, like your mom and dad lost their parents. That's just how it works. But then you don't expect to lose your kids. So it's like, everybody is going to hurt. We understand that. But it's just, it must be different.

I just, you know, being parents ourselves, it's hard to imagine having to go through that. And then even for, you know, for a brother or sister, you know, it's how did, when Mark died, how did that impact you? Well, when he died, so I had had, I had just had Truitt. And so in 1997, we got married in 92. Yeah, so we'd been married and I was on, we were on our second child. And so I just had him. And then we'd known that Mark had cancer because in 1995 he had told us he had cancer. He had lymphoma.

So he'd been fighting it. And then I got pregnant with Truitt and then I had him. But things were really going bad at that point. So, you know, end of 1996. And he was coming home because he couldn't live there in California anymore because he needed to be around us. And he wanted to have family support. So he moved home.

And the impact that had on me was so big. Like most people would say, of course it's big because your brother died. But the impact it had on me spiritually is like I was so, so broken by that, that I feel like my heart was so fertile ground for God to come into my heart at that time. Now, my brother, he, you know, he was open to all that. obviously while he was getting obviously to the end of his life and he had a pastor come named Doug Wooster came over with his sons and they would come and talk to Mark and they would pray with him and then Mark also had the Catholic priest and none come because we were raised Catholic but you know at the end that's what that's what he did and then I didn't really know I mean I wasn't

I wasn't a I wasn't a Christian mom raised as Catholic but I just you know, we stopped going, and I didn't really, it was more religion. It was like religion going and all the stuff that you have to do with that. But when it got down to that really hard thing of life and death, Mark was at, you know, he would talk about Jesus. And I was like, I was listening, but, you know, I wasn't totally sold on all that stuff. But I was, you know, I was never anti-God. I was like, I didn't really quite understand what he was saying.

But, you know, when it came down to it and Mark used to talk to Doug and they'd pray and stuff. And then Mark ended up dying April 9th. And then a few weeks after that, I mean, I was just like, it was just so crushing because he was such a good friend to me too. It wasn't just a brother, but it was somebody who I called and talked to all the time. And he, Doug called me and he said, I'd like to come and talk to you about your brother and tell you the things that he told me and the things that we discussed. And I said, yeah, I would love that. And I was just like, oh, just sick with grief, you know. And so he came over and he just told me that he goes, I just want to tell you that your brother is with the Lord.

And I was so, so, I can't. I don't know. I mean, it was good to hear, but I didn't quite understand still, but I really wanted to make sure that I see him again. And so I was just like inquiring a lot and asking the pastor as like, what do I do so I can see my brother again and how do I do these things, you know? And so he just, he, you know, we sat and talked about it for a while and we prayed about it. And I was sincere about that asking the Lord and in my heart at that time. And, you know, Doug was like, your life is never going to be the same. He said, I, he knew I was sincere, you know, when we were praying about these things. And that's all that God wants is a sincere heart. Yeah. Because you can say a prayer and just repeat it after somebody, but if you don't really know

why you're doing it or. Or believe it necessarily. Believe. It's like having faith in what you're praying for. then it's really just words. And God cares about the heart. And so I just know that when I prayed that prayer, things did change for me. And it was like a seed, it was just a little seed that was planted.

And my heart's soil was so rich and it was just fertile. It was ready for the seed to get planted. And it did and it grew and it's growing. And it's like I just feel like that changed my life. my brother dying, and I would love to see, you know, him again. And I know that I will, but it's like that happened and it was terrible and God brought about something good from that terrible thing. And, you know.

They say that. I mean, people say that all the time. Yeah. And you don't necessarily believe it because you're like, how? How could something good come from losing your brother or your friend or your mom or dad? But it did in your case. It did.

Your faith grew from that loss. It did. And it was, you know, I mean, I know that you remember how it was and how I changed. And I think you were a little bit skeptical and a little bit worried because there was some crazy guy that used to work at our job. That was super. I think he was very like, he was a very religious guy, but he was very judgmental guy. And he would just say things.

And you were like, this guy is nuts. And I think you were a little bit worried, like, is she going to be nuts? You know? And I was right. And you were right. You are. No, but it was, you know, I mean, it just took some getting used to, but I, I'm never done learning. I'm still learning.

It's not like I know all these things. And the problem with me is when I read something, I have to, you know, I'm not good at quoting scripture, you know. I mean, I've read the New Testament, you know, many times, but it's like, it's really hard for me to let's like say, oh, this is in, you know, whatever book it's in. But I don't know. I, yeah, it's just a really, it just makes life so much more. I'm kind of a worrywart because, you know, I drive you crazy with that. And I need to not be so much like that. but I know that God knows how I am.

It's my temperament. Yeah. Yeah. So, I mean, you talked about the impact of losing your brother. Then just recently it was your sister. And how has that? What was that like? Just because I think, as we said, if people haven't endured loss yet, they're going to.

So people can maybe, I don't want to say take comfort, but maybe remember kind of the lessons you've learned. maybe. Yeah. Who knows what. The first one, just, I mean, just like losing, never really having. I mean, I lost my grandpa. That was really, that was really hard to, because I was 12.

My dad was, I'd never seen my dad cry. And that was like really, it was, I mean, it was really sad. It made me, it made me cry. But I was sad because my grandpa died. But like to have, I mean, I was really close to Mark. So as I was older and that happened, I was, it was so devastating. And then, you know, then Kelly dying, it was, it was really hard. I mean, it's still, it's just a nightmare.

I mean, when you think about going back to seeing all that again. I mean, going through the cancer and seeing that, I mean, you see somebody that is, you see somebody that is that you've known your whole life that is that looks totally healthy to just to a they just look so ill and um you know when you go through cancer you're losing your hair you're getting you just shrink down to nothing and it's not healthy you're sickly looking you yeah i mean it's such a terrible way it i mean death in in general just people dying is is is terrible but i'm saying this like to watch someone die slowly in that way it's just such a terrible thing but i knew i had to go back up there in january and you know she lived in washington so yeah and we had that

terrible ice storm here and it was like my mom was like you need to come because it's getting it's she's not well and and i didn't you know so we had to truitt flew in here from utah and then me and tanner and true it drove up there and it was just we had to go 40 miles an hour because the ice was so bad all the way up to Washington. So it took us quite a while before we could get up there. But we made it up there. But it was really close. And I mean, I was able to go up and, you know, it took about three days. But it was our, you know, my almost all the family was there except for Amy decided not to come because it was quite a ways from, you know, Missouri. But And she was just, I think, really just beside herself to, she had to travel alone.

And so, yeah, and it was just, it's such a, I just still can't even believe, you know, that she's not here. But so it's a different, the, the, the, the, we were asking if it, like, the difference is, it's like, you know, I don't even think when I was going there, I was like, I didn't think that I could hardly handle. it because it was just like the met the those memories rushing back into your mind of how terrible the last one was and you just can't even fathom going through it again you know because you're just like how is this happening again but um it was just god giving me god is my life Jesus is my life so that's the only thing i could say he sustained me and got me there and um also just to be able to go. And, you know, I don't like staying up late at night.

I don't know what it is. I just like, I just want to go to bed at normal time. And I was like, it wasn't like that because there's someone who's dying. And, you know, everybody was on shifts of staying up late. And we just didn't know when Kelly was going to pass. And so even that, like, God was sustaining us to do those things too. but it's just so crazy to, you know, be in a situation like that. And you have your, you know, your dad sitting there, you know, just sitting there who's 84

and his daughter's 64 and just sitting there he's like, you know, I mean, it's just crazy. Here he's living and she's dying and this is a second kid, you know. And so it was still super really, really hard. But it just, I guess the difference is, like I said, I didn't have Christ in my life with my brother, but I have Christ in my life on this time. And I'm not saying that even if I did have to go through the death thing again, which probably will at some point,

but that it makes it easy. It just, it's like he just gives you this, he just sustained you. Just get you through. It makes you strong enough. Yeah, just enough. So, you know, I mean, I don't know. I was just thinking too about Roy and all that.

You know, you kind of going through all that like with Roy. And I just remember her conversations I would have with Roy sitting. I mean, like you'd be out of town and sometimes Roy would fly in and he would stay with us. and he would just sleep on the couch. But he would come and we would sit and you were just out of town. And it was like he was just a friend staying, you know. And we would just sit and visit and stuff in the living room together. And it was just so nice to talk to him about God.

And he talked about how much him and Jill, they would always pray for you. And how hard and how difficult it was for their family too to deal with. losing Chris and I mean it you're not just because you're a Christian it does not mean you don't have pain yeah you do yeah so Chris some people might know but Chris was his nephew and died on the river going up to the to the cabins where we bear hunted yeah yeah and he was young when he died it's like 21 or something yeah and then yeah what would you and Roy talk about. Well, we just talked about, you know, just kind of this, what we're talking about and how, you know, Christ sustains you and gets you through those hard times, even though

you're still in pain and grieving. Yeah. And it is a whopper. I mean, you can, you can grieve like, like, like, no other, but it's, it's like, you know, I was thinking about, like, even, like, I don't know. You were, that was such a hard day at Roy's funeral. And I remember telling you, I said, you know, his dad, when we were singing at the funeral at some point, I think there was a hymn or something we were singing, and Ray stood up. And he was just like singing and had his arms up in the air. And I remember telling you that

And it was like That's somebody who loves God And put their faith in God To get them through those hard times And that was so difficult And I'm sure it still is To this day But you know

You just can't imagine somebody doing that But that is where their hope is Their hope is they're going to see their son again Because they have Christ You know I mean, in Christ was in Roy's heart. And I know that, you know, it's hard for you sometimes because I know there's times where you say things like you've said things like, don't pray for me.

Or, I mean, there's times when you said that just sort of like, it's okay, you know. And it's like you want prayers. And I know that it's hard because Roy was such a good example. And, you know, he had a really stable home. And his parents were very stable people. And they raised him in a Christian home. And that's, you know, and I'm not saying, I don't know what went on in their house,

but you can look at Roy and his family and look at, you know, very stable people and stuff. And, but Roy, I just felt like I always would tell you and say to you that, I know that Christ is in Roy's heart, and you just, it's hard for you sometimes to, you know, kind of understand Jesus, but I would always say Jesus is in Roy. And do you remember how much Roy was so not judging you, and he just loved you? Like, Jesus loves you. And that's the example.

You know what I mean? Yep. Yeah. Oh. He was. Yeah. That's kind of the hard part because when will I ever have a friend like that? I mean, Wayne does.

I know Wayne does. But me and Roy were so close. So many, so many experiences. Yeah. That's why I say it's like it'll never be the same. But in a way. I don't know. I just think about God put him in your life.

Yeah. So, yeah, very hard moments. I know just because I know, but so Tanner and Trill were up there with you when Kelly died. Of course, they were way to young babies and little kids when Mark died. Yeah. But to me, it meant a lot that our sons were there to help you and help the family. And same with Kelly's daughter. Yeah.

Same with Tatum. And it's just, you know, you have these kids. And at the time, you're just raising kids and they're, who knows how they're going to turn out. You know, you try to do the best you can. But then to be able to see the, quote, next generation or your kids or whatever, somebody you raised, be there in a time of need and where strength is required. Yeah. How did that make you feel?

Oh, it made me want to cry. because yeah I mean I mean I even having Truit come here and you know fly here uh he was like he was doing it for me you know and Tanner was just like I needed her to be here you know and Tanner was just like so um they are just so loving you know and Taryn you know I needed her to be here I needed her to kind of stay home yeah I need her to stay here I need her to take care of the with the dogs and like keep everything going here so it she did her part too but I just um and I really appreciated that because I I feel like I always have to do that yeah and it was just like you know Tanner weren't you guys gone oh lion hunting Colorado that's right I flew him back Yeah, and he said, mom, if you need me to come, I'll come and we could drive up there. And everything happened so fast. Like, we had to really make things happen fast.

But it was so, like, I mean, I just, there's such good kids, all of them. And I just, I love being around all of them. And they call us all the time. Yeah. And I love it. And I just, they're like, I'm always going to be mom. you're always going to be dad, but they're going to be, they're our friends too.

You know, it's like our own little tribe. Yeah. I just, I love it when we're all together. And it's such a, it's such like harmony. Mm-hmm. And it wasn't always like that. Mm-hmm.

But, I mean, I think, you know, just thinking about how Tanner just kind of really just stepped up and was like, you know, let's, I'm going to drive you up there. And it was, but and the boys were just so kind and you know just it was just so so sweet and um so you know like we got up there and Tanner was I mean part of me I mean it was like we got a hotel room and um that first night we got there it's just so stressful to see your sister laying there, you know, and just kind of like, they had her hooked up to oxygen and stuff,

but it was just taking care of her and trying to get her through to the other side. And I just remember, like, part of me wanted to run away. I just didn't want to even see it. Yeah. And so I remember going back to the hotel room because everyone was staying at the house. And then so I went back with Tanner and Truitt. And then, you know, I called back at the house and was like,

so do you guys, how's everything going? And do you want me to, you know, like, where's everybody sleeping? And I mean, part of me wanted her to say, just stay there at the hotel because I just kind of want to stick my head in the sand. Yeah. That's kind of what I felt like. It's kind of hiding away. Kind of hiding, you know?

And then Tanner. He came up to him and he goes, Mom, I really, I really think you should go back. And he was just talking, man, I was laying on the bed and I was just like, oh, I just kind of don't want to, I just don't want to deal with it, you know? And he was getting my backpack ready and he was putting things in it. And he was like getting my clothes in there. And he was like, and then I remember just talking to, you know, one of my sisters. And I said, okay, well, is there any room there? And I could, she was saying, of course, come back.

And I was like, okay, well, I'm going to come back. And then Tanner had already had that backpack already. And he was like, Mom, that was a right decision. Yeah. And I'm going to take you back there. And even though it was just like, oh, I'm going into the storm. You know, it was just. what am I supposed to do?

I just, and then here, that was my kid. Yeah. You know? To me, that's what, that's what men are supposed to do. You know, you have to be strong help, you know, do what you can. So that's what they've been told or taught that this is when we step up. Yeah. And they did.

Yeah, they're so good. And so, you know, I feel the same way about my whole family. I mean, the most important thing to me is that everybody knows Christ. All of you guys. I mean, I just, I don't know how much more to express that. And, you know, I do. I mean, that's just the most important thing.

I mean, it wasn't always easy trying to get that kind of, you know, into their life. I mean, we were always, we were kind of on different. different pages at times, you know. Yeah. I think that happens with a lot of families. Yeah. So seeing where they are now and, you know, you said all those nice things and how strong they were and helpful and sweet, how'd that happen?

How'd you raise boys to be like that and Taryn to be like that? I think it just, I don't know. I just think it comes with their dad must be amazing. I mean, I don't want to put words in your mouth. You're so amazing. What? I didn't. Well, no.

So, I mean, but I was gone a lot. I've been hunting a lot. Yeah. I mean, you were gone, but it wasn't like you were military gone. No. I mean. But so how did how did that turn out? Because there's times when you probably didn't think you didn't know how they were in turn out.

Yeah. You know how boys are. Well, I'll just say when you did have to go like gone hunting, maybe it was like, I don't know, what's the longest you were gone? Like, would it be 10 days or something at a time? I went to Tanzania for three weeks. Oh, yeah. What year was that?

2014, maybe. Okay. 10 years ago. Okay, so Truitt was like graduating 2015. Yeah. So I do kind of remember them, but they weren't always sweet. Yeah. That's what I'm getting at.

Yeah. No. And it wasn't good because, like, when you'd leave it, they'd just be, you know. I think True was more sneaky. Because he'd always be like, oh, I'm a good, I'm the good one. You know. But then I would just be like, oh, I think, yeah, maybe you kind of are. You're kind of easy, you know.

But then there's so much stuff I didn't know about. Yeah. Yeah. Could you move that water over there? Like cameras this way. Gotcha. Camera 12. So sneaky Truitt. Sneaky Truett.

How is Tanner? Tanner was just kind of like... Honor. Tanner's like you. Yeah. So amazing. Yes, so amazing. And you couldn't tell him what to do.

You know, and I mean, him and he had a nice. kind of would butt heads, you know, but just the way it was. He was always kind of like that, even as a little kid. So, yeah, I mean, I don't know how, I just think spending time with them. And when you invest in your kids and you spend time with them and you don't just shuffle them off somewhere and you kind of do that, I think as they grow up, they realize that your parents really love you. I mean, so it's just like, as I'm just saying, it's like, spend extra time with your kids, do things with your kids. Yeah. Go on the bike rides with your kids.

Do things that, you know, that they- Make them run Pisco. I mean, do things, no. I mean, yeah, it's fine to take them up Pesca. Yeah. It's not, except not for like, you know. Family time. Yeah, family time. Whatever.

It's fine. It wasn't that big of a deal. But like, I mean, I would not, I mean, I wouldn't have made it a negative. But maybe it always kind of is a little bit. Because kids, kids don't necessarily like to do those kind of hills like that. They loved it. It's kind of hard. I don't know.

Maybe sometimes if they were like, if they knew they were going to like race each other or something. No, they never loved it. They hated it. Yeah, they hated it. So what's a funny memory or a good memory you have of each of them, say, of Tanner? Think back of a time. A good memory that we have? Oh, gosh.

No good memories. No, I know. I mean, I know I have good memories. Well, no. But like, like, what time frame? I don't really. Oh, it's fine. We can go to the peanut gallery over here.

They got some questions for us. Oh, great. I don't know if I can answer it, but. Okay. So this is from Gideon and Larry. Great. Am I on? Yeah.

Okay. So some people say that mothers make you soft. Do you agree? Yes. I think I said that, didn't I? Yeah. Yeah. You're some people.

No, I've heard this many times. No, mothers make you weak, I said. Oh, weak, not just soft. Well, I do think you need the balance. because I do think that moms can make you weak they can kind of step in and be like oh he doesn't have to do that if he doesn't want to you know and I would say yeah you're right it's okay yeah I hate to say that but it can happen because moms always want to nurture and that's that can just happen because moms aren't like get out there you big wimp you know it's like you just you just you You want to, it's like, oh, like, I would have been the worst person to be at Truit's pull-up thing. Yeah. Because it would have just been like, he doesn't feel like doing it anymore.

Right. Terrible. Yeah, it's okay, honey. You can stop. I know. Yeah. But I don't know. That's, I do, it's kind of, it is a little bit like that.

Sorry. No. Okay. Okay. Okay. This one is for both of you. Okay. Uh, where do you think you succeeded as a parent?

and where do you think you failed? Do you want me to go? Sure, go ahead. Do you got something? No, no, go. I mean, I'm going to try to think of. Okay. Where I succeeded is they're not weak.

They're very tough. Very tough kids. And I always said they're not like normal kids. they have something more. And I said, but to get it, you got to push. You know, so I said, you guys aren't, you guys aren't normal. And they didn't believe me for a long time. But I don't think they are.

I think they're, you know, special people. And then where I failed was pushing too hard a lot. I just was so focused on life as competition and that if they're going to win, they're going to have to be the toughest, the strongest, the whatever, not no give up. And so that can be hard at times. Yeah. That's my success and failures. Success and failures. What about you?

Well, I think the success part would be that they still call us. Yeah, they don't hate us. Don't hate us. I still wonder why Troutes don't want to live away from us, but... Yeah, it's kind of weird, but... Kind of weird. Makes me wonder, what did I do wrong? But no, I know that he loves us.

But I'm just saying, like, I do believe that they are... The successes, like, they still like to hang out and call us. So that's a good thing. Yeah. I feel like a little bit like, I don't know, like the failure part. Well, the failure part, I guess. I don't know if it's really a failure yet, but I don't think I did that great of a job with like showing Christ-likeness in some instances, you know,

while I was still kind of on my early journey. When you're cussing all the time. I mean, I get so ticked off. Yeah, this is kind of a problem. And when you'd hit me. Yeah, right. But I don't know. I think a lot of that too, like if you think about it,

I just, when I think about believing in Christ and also like this whole performance thing, performance, what was I saying, career? I was like kind of worried about at Truitt with the performance thing. Because it's like, I don't know. It just feels like people get so used to being performers and performance. Like they think that kind of bleeds into Christianity. And that's not really what Christianity's about at all.

Not even about it. Yeah, but couldn't you like in some way say that you're honoring the gifts that God's given you by taking advantage of it and having an impact and doing things to, you know, Roy would say that hunting was his missions field where because he was a great hunt. and he could connect with, and men would listen to him, he could use that as a way to connect and then talk about his faith. So maybe having these physical gifts, maybe that is a way to reach people. You know, you're honoring the gifts you were blessed with. Yeah. Do you think? Yeah. I mean, if that's kind of what your, if that's what your aim is kind of, you know, to do that. But I just, sometimes I just think that people get. kind of like caught up and like I've always been a performing you know and so I have to perform I mean

you have to perform you have to do good in your races you have to do you know you're hunting it's all everything's performance but you have to realize that it's not that way with Jesus because he performed and we have to just accept we have to accept the gift that he is giving us yeah the eternal life gift yeah I I get that I just That if I'm not giving my best, that's not really honoring my ability. My, you know. Well, it's okay to want to give your best, like, like what you're doing and stuff. But I'm just saying, like, sometimes it just kind of bleeds into other, can bleed into things.

Like, you know, like Roy was a really impactful Christian. And sometimes I feel like he was at such a high, it almost felt like he was at a high level. And, I mean, he never cussed. Mm-hmm. And, you know, but he needed Jesus. Yeah. I mean, I don't know what went on in his mind or in his heart, but everyone needs Christ. Yeah.

And so sometimes I feel like you don't think, like, it's like, I don't know if you compare yourself to him ever. Like, I'm not like Roy. Like Roy was more like, I don't know. Yeah, Roy was a better person. See what I'm saying? That's exactly. So you're like, well, I'm not talking about the hundred. hunting part. I'm just talking about the

Christian part of it. And I don't think you should do that. Okay. I just don't. Okay. I can talk about this all day long if you want to. I love talking about Jesus. Please tell me we got another question. Okay. This one is changing gears a little bit. Okay, you guys have been married for 30 plus years.

So there's probably been a lot of highlights and low lights, but what do you think the key is to supporting each other? Well, her realizing how lucky she is is probably the biggest thing. I think she forget sometimes, which is sad. It's really sad. Go ahead. What's the key? The key? To supporting each other.

Loving God more than you love your spouse. Excuse me? Yes, sir. When you love God more, you love your spouse better. Yeah. that's been the key for me i mean i don't know what else i could say except it because i don't have all the answers for marriage answers but jesus christ is the key and when you love god more you will love your spouse better it's just i don't know it just takes the the pressure off

i'm not saying that people shouldn't be uh you know like you have to care obviously but it's it all falls in line when that is the when that is the center, everything else falls in line. I don't, I don't, I don't know. I don't just like in the early days, it was kind of like I put that a little bit more of that pressure. I kind of wanted to change some of the stuff that you were doing. And it wasn't, that never works.

Yeah. But, you know, when you can love somebody and just love them the way Christ loves you, the pressure is off. And I don't know. I just like, that's, that's the kind of the key, I want to say. And there's not really like steps either. It's not like, if you do this, if you do this, if you do this, everything works really good. It's just like, Jesus is the answer.

Yeah. So. Yeah, I mean, from my perspective, you've always supported me and whatever, whatever goals I've had. You've been like, how can I help, you know, whether it's food, making, lunches, things I didn't have to think about, just so I could go to work, do how to do at work, train, do all that. So you were always, like we were a team, it seemed like.

With the kids, it was same. I would like the disciplinary and you were the nurturer type thing. So that worked there. Well, I don't feel like I always thought that, well, if I'm doing good, that means like you didn't have to work like you could stay home with taran because you had to work all the way up through all the other kids i just didn't i wasn't making any money and uh we didn't have shit so it's like uh we had really no choice i think we even when tanner was born didn't what did we get we got milk and cheese

from wick or something yeah because i had to take an extra six weeks off of work be not not paid yeah so we needed help from the government so we got those we had no We had no money. Zero money, one car, a little beat up truck. As shitty duplex or apartment. Yeah. Whatever the hell it was. In the ghetto.

And then it was Tanner just like was so colicky. I could not even get my brain straight to get up in the morning and go to work. Yeah. It was too hard. And so I just thought we need to get him straightened out before I can do anything. And we didn't have the money. So I had needed to do. And that was so, to me, it was just like so embarrassing.

Did you use those little, those little, I think it was like little dollars. Coupon or something. It was like so obvious you'd whip those out and it'd be like, oh gosh, I need to. Welfare. It was welfare. Basically. But then it couldn't wait to get off of those. Yeah.

No. But yeah, when you weren't working and I wasn't making any money and we had a kid and all that and we had to get groceries, it's like no one's bailing us out. I mean, there's nobody else. No. So the point I was making is like, I always measured myself as far as, success goes, you know, you said you've always had to perform or do this to, you know, at this level. Well, that was what work was to me. I'm like, I got to figure out how to make more money.

I got to figure out how to take better care of my family because I hadn't, I wasn't doing a good job of that. And so I needed a better job than working at the warehouse, which is what I was doing at that, you know, at that time. And then I was like, I got to build if you can stay home, you know, we have another, we had, you know, Taryn. So leaving the daughter wasn't going to happen. It seemed a lot harder. So, yeah, I always measured, you know, what I could do is like just providing, you know. And wasn't probably let all the other shit lacks because I'm like, no, I just got to get, you know, a car was dependable for you to drive, get it out of the ghetto somehow. Can we do that?

And, you know, then you go and kind of. grind and sacrifice for years and then you want to, you know, have your kids go to to the best schools if they can to help set themselves up. So I was always focused on just a providing aspect, I guess. Yeah. And you did a good job. It was hard. It was really rough sometimes. Yeah. You know, so no, and I do remember like when I had Taryn and I was like, I'm not going back. I'm not going back to that job because there's no way I'm going to get her ready to give her hand her over to a daycare. Mm-hmm. I just couldn't do it again.

Yeah. You didn't care about the boys, but yeah. Oh, yeah, I didn't care about the boys. Okay. That was a nightmare, actually. Yeah, you would cry all the time. Yeah, I would cry to work, drive. And so Tanner's standing at the window, hands on the window crying.

And I'd be in my car pregnant, crying with Trude, driving to work. Soft. Yeah, soft. That was not fun. But when Taryn came along, it was just like, I think we need to figure something out. But I still did go and clean houses with her on my back. Yeah. And a little backpack.

I know. And that was hard. Yeah. You've always been a hard worker. So she got big enough to her. I was like, I can't clean the house now because now she's like crawling. So I could, you know. So do you like when people say it must be nice to be where we are now?

Yeah. I don't even care. Whatever. Let me say whatever you want. They just don't know the story. Yeah, I know. But yeah, we didn't, we had nothing. And it's fine.

I mean, I've always been like, you know, grew up with family where my dad was just like, my parents said if you, whatever, you want something, you have to work for it. Yeah. You know, always had a job. Even it wasn't like outside. It was just like the babysitting or washing people's cars or doing their walking their dog or whatever. was I was make my own money. And so that, that mentality took us into, you know, getting through all that. Yeah. I mean, and that's all my dad really cared about, really. He was like, you guys just need to work hard to make it in life. Yeah. Because that's what I did. Yeah. So he was gone a lot working. I think you kind of mentioned. And, you know, so your dad wasn't a big part of raising the kids. Your mom was doing, he had to provide for seven. Yeah. But he did set the example of heart.

work, you know, and the expectation of hard work. Yeah, I mean, dad was, I mean, he was a stud. I mean, he was just like doing concrete work and, you know, and he did, he worked for Western beverage and but the concrete came after that. But he, he would when he worked for like Franz Bakery or Western beverage, he still had go work on the weekends up in Auburn and pour concrete up there. Yeah. And so that was that. Seven kids is a lot to provide for. Yeah, and my mom would have to deal with all that by yourself here down, you know, down here. But so, I mean, and that was never a cakewalk either with those guys.

It wasn't like everything was just peaches and cream, but it was stable. Stable home, you know, mom just going to Goodwill or we would get a hand-me-downs. Clothes were always clean. Grandma Marge would always sew any kind of holes in clothes. Yeah. You know what I mean? There was always food on the table and there was always like she'd make tons of good food. Yeah.

And never bought junk food. I mean, it was like, I don't know. I always wanted to go over to my cousin's house and have like deli meat. Chunk food? Yeah, American cheese with white bread. We never got that. Always healthy. Always healthy.

Yeah. So. You said peaches and cream twice so far on this podcast. How come? I don't know. Good description, I guess. Peanut Gallery. Any other questions?

I think this is one that everyone wants to know. What is the best part about being married to Cam and what is the worst part? Oh, yeah. There is no worst part. The best part about being married to Cam is I just, Camp's been my friend for a lot of years.

So we have a friendship built up, you know. And I mean, I can say that. I can say that without doubt. The worst part is I would, he still drives me crazy about pushing so hard. And I am always trying to get you to slow down. Trying to sabotage. Not trying to sabotage.

I just, I cannot, hardly sometimes I cannot take. I'm like, what? I always say overdoer, but it's true. I have said that for you. We said that for 30 years. I have said that for years. But it is actually is true. So that's the worst part.

It's like, you know, I know when you're hurt. I know when you don't feel good. I see all those things. That's never happened. I see the things that people don't see. So that's the worst part of it. I run down the stairs full speed every morning, chipper, cook breakfast for everybody. Usually take coffee up to you in bed.

Make sure the laundry's done and folded. Make sure all the dishes are done before anybody gets up. Kay? Does that sound about right? Yeah. It's really good, Cam. Yeah, we got a couple more. Okay.

Okay, and then I'm getting out of here. Yeah, two more, two more. If you could go back to the day you two met, what would you tell yourselves? I'd say, I could get the hell out of here. We'd go back to the day that we met and what would we tell ourselves? Yeah. I'd say I should get my own watch. So I don't have to ask this girl what time it was all the time.

No, I'd say, I don't know. So she had, I don't want this to be disrespectful, the nicest ass in the warehouse. Don't be gross. So like we'd be on the loading dock loading trucks and then you'd walk by and we'd say a moment of silence. So what would I say now? Probably the same. Well, that's really deep. Thank you.

I don't really know what. Those kind of questions are kind of hard. What would I say? You'd say, are you ever going to get a better job? No. Than working at the warehouse? No. I don't know.

Okay. More? Any of the thing else? Did Cam have the best man ass? I don't. I hate when people say stuff like that. It's so corny. I had the nicest.

You could bounce a quarter of my ass. Okay. Last one. Okay. Are these you guys? Yeah. Oh, okay. No, this is from the general public. Okay, great. We are the general public. This is from ESPN. Okay. I'm sure.

What are you both proud of that you've accomplished together? I think it's the kids. Yeah. Raising the kids. That's the most important thing. I don't know. In our family, it's just like they matter. Yeah, so, but I'm, how come, why are the kids, why is Truitt setting world records and Tanner's The Ranger and Terran's obsessed with school? Why are they all like they are? Well, I don't think that's from me. I think that's from you. I think, I think they've just seen, you know, I think fathers are super,

influential. I do. I just think more, I mean, you're the one who was doing all the crazy stuff. Yeah, but you're athletic.

Oh, gosh. I mean, I do like to, I like to get out and do stuff, but now it's just so much harder. Yeah.

I mean, I don't know. It seems like I always get hurt now, but it's so ridiculous. It's so boring. We don't talk about boring stuff like that. But, no,

I think, You're saying that, it's like, well, what do you think? I think it's because of all the things that you've done. I mean, you're the one who was doing all the crazy running and, you know. Yeah, but it can't just be the dad. The mother has influence, too. Yeah, I mean, I guess I don't really think of myself as being that way with them. For whatever reason, you spent probably more time with them than I did, didn't you?

I know, I have, but it's, I don't know. But yeah, they are definitely our greatest success for sure. I think so. I did want to, before we get off here, you've talked about this before, so I was just kind of curious if you thought more about it. But you, you know, my dad died in 2010. You said now you wish you could go, you wish he was still here or you could talk to them. You know, you could have conversations with them.

What do you say that now? Well, I say that now because, you know, that was, you know, when you think you know everything. I mean, I don't think I knew everything, but I just, we were so different. And, but really, we're not that different. I mean, as I get older, I just see, like, I love, I love books. Yeah, he loved to read. And he loved going to the Goodwill. Yeah.

And St. Vinny's. And I love doing that because it's fun. It's like everything's so cheap. And there's so many books there and it's fun. And I do remember going with your dad too. There was this little bookstore. You asked if I would take him to his appointment for his cancer stuff. So I did.

And then he went to stop by and go to a bookstore and stuff. And I just remember finding a book there. And he was just kind of thrilled that I was thrilled and stuff. And I, you know, it was kind of sad. I do remember like him. and I kind of, we just kind of a little bit butt heads, you know, over certain things. Like, he was more liberal. I was not as liberal as him.

But, you know, I just think that that gap has just kind of, you know, gotten smaller over time. And I always say, I wish I could talk to your dad now. Mm-hmm. He wasn't like a crazy liberal, like a leftist type thing. He's not a loony, pink-haired weirdo. Yeah. I'm just saying he was, he's just. like your old-fashioned guy like that.

South Eugene. Yes. Track, just how he grew up in Eugene his whole life. And it's been liberal. I wish that I could go back and I wish that I could go with him to the bookstores. And I wish I could go over to his house and look at his books and pay attention a little bit more to what he had up on his bookshelf and have a conversation with him and not worry about the other bull crap.

Yeah. And just be like that because I remember the day that I took him to his appointment and I was kind of in a hurry because I had to go pick up Taryn at kindergarten. And I, he was, he got kind of, he got a little melancholy, you know, at times. And so like when I pulled up in the driveway, he, and I kind of had to, I was in a hurry and I had to get a pickup turn, and he just leaned over, and he touched my hand, and he goes, I wish that we could have, I wish I had got to know you better, you know. And it was so, it was such a genuine thing for him to say.

And it was really sweet. And I said, I know. And I just had to get out of there. I wish I had to leave again. But I had to rush all the way back to Springfield and go pick up Taryn, whatever. Or no, it wasn't Springfield, but it was another part of Eugene. I had to get all the way across town. In South Eugene, it was a pain of the butt to get through.

But, yeah, if I could go back, that's what I would do with Bob. I would spend, Taryn would have loved to hang out with him and go, because that's what we'd love to do. Yeah. We'd love to go to the bookstores. Yeah, I just, I remember going over there and him, having music turned up so loud singing. He was, he loved music.

And the kids, and even Tanner loves music too. Not the truth, doesn't. Yeah, they both do. All the kids do. So Bob had all those records.

He had so much music there. He was very knowledgeable about music. And could tell so many stories. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Because he had that music, he also had that music store in Portland, right? He owned that music store there.

record store yeah the record store yeah so if i could you know yeah that that had been it just sucks i mean it's such a bummer did people got to go early yeah you know because he was like 62 i think yeah i mean not even that old not even that old and he was like i'm not ready to go i don't want to go he loved he loved helping the kids down at the school and being a track coach and Oh, man, he was the best. He was. He was really good at it. Yeah.

It's just a, it's tragedy that he's gone, you know. Yeah, he was a big personality and people loved him. Yeah, they did. A lot of people showed up at the memorial for him. Mm-hmm. That was a long memorial too, because people, everyone wanted to say something. So it took quite a while, you know, for people, everyone wanted to get up and say things about Bob.

Yeah. So, yeah. Sad. Any more questions? That's it. You guys are good. Do you have anything you'd like to say? Well, I guess that was kind of it.

Well, I know you didn't want to do this. But I wanted to have this on whatever. So someday when we're gone, these stories, these moments we've talked about, what we've been through will live on, right? So in that regard, what would you want to say? Just say something to Terran,

Truitt and Tanner. Well, if I'm going to say something to Tanner, I would say you are such, you're such a great son. I couldn't be happier in the way that you've turned out.

And, you know, the fact is, even if you didn't turn out, I'd still love you. That's what I would say to Tanner. I love him because he's my son, not because of anything he's done, any great thing he's done. He's a part of me. And I just, I'm just glad he's my kid.

You know, he's a great, he's got a great personality, and he's funny. And he's also super feeling. you know, he's got a, he's got a deep sense of feeling about him and he's a great kid. And he'd do anything for me if I asked him to. And for Truitt, he's always been my little buddy. I mean, from the very beginning, too. He was like, always, I mean, he's such a sweet little kid.

And like that story, I'd always say when I'd work with him. nights and I'd have to take a nap during the day. And I had him at home and I'd say, hey, we got to go take a nap and you can play with your G.I. Jo's. And he would just lay next to me while I was trying to sleep during, you know, a little bit. So I didn't feel like I had sand in my eyes. He would just play with his G.I. Joe's and I could hear him kind of like playing with his little toys, you know, next to me. Like what would you say? I don't know. Just make the sound seed make? I don't know. Like fighting. Yeah. Poo, pooh, pooh. Poo. Poo. Poo. He would just do that all the time.

He was so funny. Yeah. I didn't literally remember that. So it was so sweet. He was just a really good little boy. And, I mean, pretty easy. But, you know, like I said, he was kind of sneaky too as he got older. But it's fine.

Whatever. I love him still. But, and he's a great, he's a great friend, too. Like, I could talk to, when I had Truitt at home, he was working and going to college. We had a lot of time to talk about God and stuff. Tanner moved out and kind of just started doing his own thing, you know. So it was a little bit different. But True, it was around.

So I was able to kind of like pour into him a lot. And so I think he was really, it was good. We really talked a lot about Jesus and the Bible and everything. So True really understands that. And so that was great. And so I really loved all that time that we had. And then Taryn is, she is like my friend. And I'm her mom, but it's like, I could, I can't tell you, I spent so much time with her.

And I love her so much. Like she is such a blessing to have come into this, to our world. Just, I mean, cannot believe that she stepped into this place. It was like, God just said, okay, you need a daughter. So it was pretty amazing because you thought we were having a boy. Like you thought you were so sure that she was a boy. And it was hilarious when she was born. You said you were ready to say it's a boy and you had to say girl.

That was terrible. It was the, even though it was very painful. I would just say that was the best moment ever. Yeah. She's amazing. She's amazing. I was very thankful for her. I didn't know how to raise a girl, but...

I know. You shouldn't be afraid of it. I mean, girls, they need their dads, you know? So, dads, if you have a girl, like we know, Tanner's going to have a girl. Yeah. You just got to be there for your girls. You got to be there for all your kids for your boys and girls, but I'm just saying, don't be afraid of girls.

Dads, don't be afraid of them. You just got to love them, you know. That's what girls need. They need their dads. So I'm really, I just, all I say, all my kids, I love all my kids, they're all my friends. Yeah. And if, you know, people knew how wonderful it is to have kids, it's, yeah, you're giving up some of your freedom in the beginning. But if you have them young enough too, it's like you can still kind of be there down the road and still do things with your kids.

It doesn't mean your life ends. I mean, like a lot of people think that it's like, oh, I'm a kid to cost money. and this is like we don't get to have our free. It's like, do you realize you're going to have somebody that you love more than you love yourself or anything? I mean, it's just, it's like the best thing. I couldn't imagine not having kids. Well, I mean, I know personally I wouldn't be who I am without kids.

You know, I mean, that's given me the reason to work hard, try to do better to. You changed overnight, like when we have. had dinner. It was, it was like, it just like something got in you and you were like, I'm going to, I'm going to apply for, you know, I don't know, like, what was it like at coast to coast? You were, you were just kind of, you know, doing, loading the trucks and then all of a sudden, you went into a management position. I mean, that's just what happens. You want to work hard when you have kids. You want to work harder because you care about your kids. Yeah, and there's more there's more pressure. As a man, you're like, hey, I have to take care of these people.

But the tradeoff is good. Yeah. Oh, it's the best. That's what I say. It's not, it's all hard. It's a positive. Yeah. It's like it makes everything, gives everything a reason. Here's my reason. It is. It's this. And these people are relying on me and I love them and I want to take care of them. And we're not going to stay young forever. You know, it's like, so it's like, enjoy your youth, but have some kids. and your life will be better. That's just all I have to say. Well said. Okay, well, I know you didn't want to do it.

Thank you. Okay, all right. The public demanded it. They're probably going to be bored. The moms will like it. It's fine. I don't care. Either way.

Yeah, all right. Thank you. Okay. Bye. Bye.