Cancelled with Tana Mongeau & Brooke Schofield - 25: Episode 25: Mike Majlak on Addiction, Fame and Anxiety

Episode Date: April 6, 2022

In this episode Tana and Brooke are joined by Mike Majlak. They discuss Mike's book, addiction, anxiety, Anthony Bourdain and more. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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BetMGM operates pursuant to an operating agreement with iGaming Ontario. Cancer. Don't remember doing this at all i can only hold myself accountable look how good my life is so what else cancel me tanimotia is canceled hello and welcome back to another episode of impulsive me too today we have a guest. We couldn't get Logan Paul, guys. We tried. I'm serious. We tried so hard. He's my dream guest. One of my favorite people. Icon,

pussy slayer. Adam Sandler lookalike. Sober king, impulsive host, Mike Malak himself. Hello, Mike Malak. It's funny because everyone in impulsive claps with you guys when you clap. Yeah. Well, two people clapping is enough.

I got to say this right off the bat. Your set is probably like, as far as YouTube based podcasts are concerned, this is the best set. Hands down. Thank you. Like dude, like these little cutouts. Tana Mongeau loves playing B. Mike Madflack.

Tana Mongeau goes to catch. Yeah. If you really read them, they're very funny. Brooke wrote them all. Isn't that like- Just so you know, they're like super, super funny. And you also have a really good, she also has a really good green room.

It's like a back deck, almost like a college where beer pong would be played. Yeah. She'd get a beer pong table for the back deck. That would be iconic. It was nice. I sat out there and watched the episode before this one and uh me and david were just sitting there and the only thing you guys do the whole time is look at that screen and so i want to so just for people watching this so you guys know there's a monitor that shows all

the different angles i already talked to page tana's assistant about this. And she said, Tana will not, will not turn that television off under any circumstance. And Tana, I come here today to ask you, will you turn that monitor off? Fuck no. Listen to me. Listen to me.

It's a, it's a distraction for you. I promise you, if you, if you look here and at the guest, it'll produce a much better product than you giving a fuck what... You look beautiful, Tana.

Thank you. Always. Always. Look at Mr. Impulsive coming on. He's got 300 episodes under his belt. He's like, listen, bitch, this is what you're gonna do. To be fair, Mike, I blew up for being a narcissist. I have stared at the viewfinder from video one to video 500.

I think if you are watching the canceled podcast and you want someone to look in the fucking camera, go watch Impulsive. And I'm just so cute and gorgeous. I can't help it. Hi, guys. I'll look in the camera. I'll try to look in the camera this episode.

Is that a good middle ground? No, it's fine. Do whatever you want. I just wanted to fuck with you. I also want to apologize to your audience because I really, I know I always look like a slob. Well, that too.

But I always. That wasn't even the apology. I always look like a slob, but especially today I was hiking. Like literally right before this show. I love hiking. It was great. Is there a story there? No, I just love lying for no reason.

And just the idea of like how you guys used to kind of you guys almost had like a little beef a little podcast to podcast beef so the idea of you just being like i need water and her being like i love water water's my favorite trying to like get along with you so hard hey you know like beefs happen especially i think that that beef was like a microcosm of most beefs in the world because because it was meaningless it was based on miscommunication it was like a microcosm of most beefs in the world because because it was meaningless it was based on miscommunication it was and a lot of people i was gonna say that a lot of people think i like just like blatantly lied in the situation and we like cleared it up and it was like wide brook lie but it's like i i wholeheartedly believed what i was saying and then as soon as i got my

as soon as i got my facts straight i was like like, fuck. I try very hard, diligently, whatever you want to say, to make sure that the stuff that I say is accurate. Oh, so you're not here. Not here at all. Because I want to break that. And by the way, you guys crush it. And I love that style. You guys weave a storyline.

You get people enthralled in it. Tana's, what's Tana doing today? Who's she fucking? Is she back with her ex? Like all that stuff. It's just a different vibe from what, you know,

what I do. Logan definitely like with his different, you know, pursuits with, with the wrestling now and the boxing, there is a storyline there.

Logan Paul can't lie for fun. We can. We get less viewers though. Yeah, I'm fine with that. I'm fine with that statement. Yeah, I feel like it's more important.

Honesty is more important for you guys. I do. Not that we're just like dishonest out here we're just exaggerative and like we don't fact check like we're dramatic as fuck but that's kind of it's like watch two dramatic bitches discuss la like that's kind of the premise of the whole podcast you know and i love that by the way we've gone in and out of our our um times like exposing ourselves and exploiting our sex lives for content yeah and it used to be a ton of fun but like recently like i he he always told me he always thought it was logan always thought it was funny that i would just like talk about anything yeah and lately i found myself kind of like pulling

back a little bit because i have stories that that like involve people with your crew even yeah i just don't even oh i want one here can you give one here i feel like it's gonna there's gonna come a time where both of us just regret this so heavily. That's what he always told me. What can you do? Take it back? No. I understand for you. I've been doing this since the womb. I would have to regret my whole life. You know what I mean?

Which you might at some point. I noticed that with you recently, though, because I've been watching The Night Shift for like two years now. I watch your every episode. You've been on it. You're on it. I was on The Night Shift very early, but I've been watching it since the jump,

and I tune in weekly. I'm not kidding. And I noticed lately you've been trying to have more like long form, meaningful content in your vlogs. And I love that for you. I seriously can't relate at all, but I love it for you. I think we all have. I think like whether it's me, whether it's George, obviously Logan has really just continued to move towards the mainstream with the boxing, with the wrestling and with, you know, all of his, and Prime, of course, Drink Prime, and all of his business pursuits.

But I think, like, at the very least, George and I in our content have wanted to start to really infuse more of that value, obviously. Well, George has always been meaningful. He does. You were awful. I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding.

Your growth is incredible, though. I think that you take criticism very well as well. Like, I feel like in the early days of Impulsive like comments would be like a little less team mike and now they i was telling brooke today like we were talking about this like just to not let the comments like define you but you know use them as constructive criticism but not let it define your self-worth and i think you're really good at that i was even just thinking about that with you guys is like little scandal i like someone who can kind of fake beef and fuck around for the internet and play, but it's not too serious to them.

And I'm like, I felt like that was like kind of real. No, it was a hundred percent real. I would never, I wouldn't have a fake beef. The thing about it was like, I would never, I would never even exaggerate it. I, I, I'm a person that steers clear of conflict always. And because I want to be a person that others, well, I tried to, but I want to be a person that other people look at and say, okay, if, if we are going to look at this guy, like make no mistake, no matter what we do in our lives or how we try to make believe we're not

role models, we have by way of our platforms elevated to a place where we have influence over people. And like, we have to accept that, that responsibility. Right. And so I have tried to personally steer away from a conflict because I think it's a good example to other people that conflict is not how it is not, it does not, it's not productive and does not lead to great. That's what I meant to say to her yesterday. She's like asking me like, we have to talk about this. And I'm like, I don't want to talk about that anymore.

It's just problematic for no reason. And she's like, Brooke, you have to like, and it's like, I find myself to like and it's like i find myself like one for josh richards one time my god come on um no i think that's bad i i have always kind of lived and thrived in chaos so for me being the most authentic to my brand is being chaotic i agree with you beginning of my career to now i definitely hold a higher standard to myself of okay regardless of if you say you want to be a role model or not you are yeah thanks um it's what you have to accept so i try to be better you know but i i definitely am a very chaotic individual and it's hard for me to steer well it's also like it's also low-hanging fruit and it's and especially

as it pertains to the internet and i'm like yeah and i get and i get hungry i get that it's very easy to grab that stuff and like i've been you know invited into many beefs in my career and had a lot of different choose your own adventures as to how I could navigate each one of those. And generally speaking, I've always tried to like take the higher road. I don't relate to you. But I'm also old. Like you think, can you imagine if I was ever your age on the internet? I would be in prison.

100%, like absolutely no questions asked. 37, I'm an old man. You're 37? Yeah, I'm an old man. Don't say it like that. No, you can. I'm a transparent. I'm 30, guys.

37, you have so many years left. I'm 37. My hair is thinning rapidly. Not that rapidly. I supplement my testosterone with testosterone treatment. Fair. I, you know, I'm not very good at maintaining a relationship with one woman. I don't spend it.

Is that an old person thing? No, but I'm just giving him everything. I used to smoke crack. He's like, I fuck bitches. He like adds one. He's just laying it out on the table. Because that's the thing about me. Like, I don't want to hide anything.

I have absolutely nothing to hide. And I think that the new direction of creator, I would love it to be transparency and authenticity across the board. We'll put a smile on your face. Bet on the sports you love with BetRiver Sportsbook. Take a chance. Must be 19 plus. Available in Ontario only. Please play responsibly. If you have questions or concerns about your gambling or someone close to you, please contact ConnexOntario at 1-866-531-2600 to speak to an advisor free of charge. I do that. I think that's what I will say.

As much as you want to be down on yourself, I feel like you are very, like, lay it all out. This is who I am. Sorry if you hate it. Sometimes it's a little much but i mean definitely transparent i know that's the problem with that is that like like we said we you can't really pull that back so it's like you say too much now and you might not want people to like know that later and it's like what do you do about that that was a big concern i'm just digging a hole so deep i'll never get out let's be real well you may but you'll here's here's what you'll learn to do tana you'll you'll learn how to uh take it and provide it as a lesson to the viewer. Do you know what I'm saying? And give them a takeaway from it.

So like, so like when I wrote the fifth vital, I had to come to terms with the idea of putting shit out there that I like the stuff we're talking about today is one thing. And I'm okay saying, oh, my hair is thinning. I'm okay saying like I I am not good at holding a relationship it's a whole different thing to talk about like your grandfather struggling for help downstairs while you're smoking crack and like you can't help him you know what I'm saying like like not to get super deep but like I love that shit tore me apart like that tore my fucking heart apart but I was able to say yo this is what I went through this is the

takeaway because because it's a very vulnerable thing to do exactly exactly I so there's a it's but I was able to say, yo, this is what I went through. This is the takeaway. It's a very vulnerable thing to do, Mike. Exactly. So it's a balance. Yeah. I was actually going to say with you, you were like, you need to make a lesson. I'm about, like I just signed my first book deal. Congrats.

And so that's my first, my goal with the book for sure is definitely to actually like create some lessons from the things I've gone through versus just being a transparent asshole. But with that being said, one of my biggest inspirations with writing a book was your book. I, you know, I don't read a lot. Big shock to the cancel viewers.

She read it. I read your book and I loved your book. I would read it again. And we talked about this. We were at Tao like a couple, like a month ago at dinner, you and me. And literally we were at a table and this is rare for you. We were at a table full of bad bitches and people with more clout than me.

And Mike spent the entire dinner sitting with me talking about his book and talking about like, you know what, giving me advice for like what I'm about to embark upon. You also gave me kind of the, I don't know what you call it, but the spark notes of your second book, a bunch of highlights of things you're writing about.

And your second book is crazy. I got it too. I got a little bit of a- A little taste, right writing about. And your second book is crazy. I got it too. I got a little bit of a... A little taste, right? Yeah. And it's incredible. I think it's one thing that I think I've never seen from an influencer or a celebrity.

I've seen influencers and celebrities talk about addiction, but not a lot of people talk about it transgressing into other addictive traits, such as in the Hollywood world being like sex addicted. And your second book, in my opinion, you start to kind of delve into that, the sex life of LA and what that did to you and where you're at now. And what was it again? It was a toxic world, devoid of morals,

ripe with adultery, you know, like, you know, that's where I'm going with the second book. I think, I think there's, you know, in part of the chapter that I read to you talk about entourage and everybody always looked at entourage as this really good rep representation of what goes on in Hollywood. And while it was, it was 10%. Hollywood is, is it, is it a dark, dark place? And the shit that happens with the crossover of obviously crossover that I'm extremely familiar with, but the crossover of, you know, entertainment, porn, rampant drug use.

And by the way, more than anything, more than anything, the generation of wealth, the generation of wealth in Los Angeles is wild. Right. And so it's when you combine all those things uh it produces stories that that are unbelievable unbelievable and and and the goal of the second book is to tell those stories um in a way that i'm that i'm able to also provide some sort of tangible uh takeaway for the for the reader what do you hope to apply to their life i mean i mean from the second book i mean for me just all i could let's just talk about that chapter for a second. I mean, there's a chapter where I talk about a really kind of fucked up sexual experience I had with a couple big porn stars. And it's great.

And I read it and it's great. I was in town like, oh my, it's great. I love your stories. Continue. With some underwater head and a Mac Miller line about, I keep a freak bitch even when she underwater, she could deep throw. And that happened. So insightful, truly. Yeah, it was a great mac line obviously two mac lovers we'll talk about that later but uh they're bawling on the podcast but like but like you know you present

these stories and like people i'm sure know me as as this guy who does spend a ton of time with beautiful women and with porn stars and with girls of all different kinds. I wouldn't call it that because it's always on a sick one ends at some point. No, you're just on a sick one. It's just a consistent. You are always just a sick one. But the, but the, the takeaway from that is, um, I say it like this, or at least my plan is around the structure, uh, growing up every man in the world, uh,

has this idea that it would be the best thing ever to be able to fuck every girl in the world like like and Lil Wayne has songs about it like if I wish I could fuck every girl whatever right and guys grow up with this with this thing they're like oh I wish I could be a player I wish I could I could do this and I could do that and a lot of my fans a lot of the kids that watch my stuff are like or young adults a lot yeah and they're like wow that shit's great yeah like that shit makes me miserable like that's the story I'm trying to deliver. Like there's no love there. There's no, there's no affection there. There's no long lasting, uh, goal, family, passion. It's all devoid. It's, it's, it's not exactly, it's an unfulfilling exercise.

And so like, when you look at these people, um, when you look at Bill Zarian or when you look at like, I'm sure even Hugh Hefner, and I don't want to speak for dan and dan dan you know is a friend of mine and is a great guy but like generally speaking uh you know as a general note people that live a life that that is ripe with different women every night are living unfulfilled from from a point of and it does it becomes another addiction and so where do you feel like you i mean because obviously with that being said it becomes kind of a disassociative act and you know what i mean just like another thing that you're doing that you're addicted to and we actually i started to try to touch on this with you at jeff fm but it just wasn't the time and the place

um what are your current thoughts now on after living a life like that? Like, cause I always think about this. I always think about the fact that like, I always say like, Oh, I'm 23. My life's so crazy. One day I'm going to wake up and I'm going to have a family and I'm going to get married and whatever. But as time goes, you just laughing at that blatantly. Um, but as time goes on, it's like you, you do become so accustomed and addicted and used to this lifestyle that you almost don't know how to live in the other one do you like how do you feel about your future and that sense of monogamy and

what do you feel like is in your cards after living you know six to seven years in LA filled with this lifestyle when it started way before that I mean I've been I've been having this type of relationship with, uh, women and, and casual sex since I was probably 16 years old, you know? So it wasn't, you know, there was, I said, another thing I say in the book or will is like a blue check just added more silicone. You know what I'm saying? Like the girls before the blue check just weren't, you know, they didn't have Botox and fake tits, but they were all, you know, like that was just my thing. Should have tuned into the last podcast. Trying to get more silicone seriously i really am but it's it's you know it's

it's um i i guess i guess how i'll put it is like this i think over the past couple years or over the past year obviously i was in a relationship and a dedicated relationship i didn't have any you know major troubles with with the monogamy beyond the beginning which you know you're laughing about but like but like i think i think that's also the trouble with this is getting serious with you because you are one of my like favorite people and besties and i'll talk about that too but like but like basically where i'm going with it is if you're if if you want okay so as an east coast person i i have always had trouble with manifestation because that's just not how we're bred. We're bred to like fucking, yo, work, work, work.

If you want something, go get it. I feel the same way. And so like right now what I'm trying to do and the way I'm trying to look at it is if you want monogamy, start to think monogamously. So start to like, yo, like I've told myself for years now, like, yo, you're never going to be married. You're never going to have that kind of relationship because it's just not, you're not built for it. You know what I'm saying? No, no. I was telling myself that.

Now, recently, I've been trying to, like, love myself into a position again where I'm like, yo, you are a good mother. Like, you are. You're a caring friend. You're a caring person. You were very in love with Lana. I saw a side of you that I didn't think existed. Absolutely. And shit.

And I do think you're capable of it. But it's all about retraining your brain, I guess. That's what I'm getting at. And people don't really talk about that in LA, like the way, or even just like in this type of lifestyle, like retraining your brain, I guess. Well, the first thing you need to do is admit that the relationship that you're currently having with romantic situations and intimacy is a problematic. Yeah. I mean, if the way media has trained men is that if you live the life that I'm currently living, that you have won some sort of award. And it's far the opposite. It's completely the opposite. And it's it's it's, you know, like I said, a very lonely and unfulfilling life, you know.

And so and so the the way I present stories in the book is by countering what could seem as brags as lessons. Because a lot of the stuff seems, the life we live seems very attractive and a lot of it isn't. A lot of it's not. When you want to bet on sports, play it on a field or ice or course. BetRivers is the place.

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please contact ConnexOntario at 1-866-531-2600 to speak to an advisor free of charge. It's hard to explain to somebody outside of it, too, because you'll say things in a way that, it does sound like you're bragging and you're like like it's it's hard to speak especially like i don't know like where you're from if you go home and you're like telling people stories that seem very normal and it like it just feels like very like like i'm just ragged boasting boasting 100 i know exactly i know exactly but it's like like you're trying to explain it in a way that's like oh this like kind of like oh it kind of sucks like kind of like yeah but it's

there's no and that's that's another thing too i think that's it's a very big dichotomy in hollywood is it's like you you can never really complain about this life because if you are everyone is going to tell you you are so awful for complaining yeah we wouldn't trade it that's the thing it's like i wouldn't i wouldn't live a normal life if we could but like it's not what it seems like you said it's so unfulfilling you get here and you're like okay like i'm not excited by this like i thought i would be when i got here yeah 100 a lot of parts of it too it's not just it's not just intimacy and romanticism you know it's like especially it's especially an important story too because when you look at the desires professional desires of kids and young adults

out there, like it's something like 75 percent of them want to be a creator. They want to be a YouTuber. They want to be an influencer. So crazy because that was not even like us growing up. It was never even like, I mean, for you, I guess. Yeah, but I was like the anomaly. Like it was a remote thing to want to be that until this generation. But now there's a thing.

There's like a, I forget what the percentage was, but like you ask like high schoolers or middle schoolers now and they all want to be YouTubers. A YouTuber, a gamer, a Twitch streamer. It's crazy. And by the way, like once again, like it's incredible. We're so blessed to be able to do it,

but it's... The rewards counteract the cons, you know, but I mean, the cons are definitely there. I mean, to touch on that, like that's what it was just making me think about. Not only does the sexual aspect of it become unfulfilling, but I just remember being in a time of life where it's like, no one should be 21

and feel like I've seen everything and nothing excites me and nothing makes me happy and I could see anything in the world happen in front of me right now. And I'd be like, oh dope, I've seen that. Like, you know what I mean? Like you have to be out here. And like you said, learn to love yourself

to find security and happiness, like in the normalcy. Well, you see it manifest in every person who has ever like had it all like the britney spears the lindsey lohan's like all the people who are young and like and achieve that where everybody is looking at what you're doing and like they seem to have like all the money all the fame and it's like no like all of those people are unhappy most people turn to like crazy shit i think that's do you feel like you got like turning to crazy shit out of your system? Yeah. I mean, that's definitely one of the reasons why I'm able to navigate this city and this

life with a little bit more ease than the normal person, because I have extremely high guardrails and protections for myself that I can't fall into certain things. And also like, look at, look at like the core downsides of this city and of this industry i'm kind of protected against most of them so like generally speaking if you're a creator influencer celebrity that comes in the city uh first and foremost you have the potential to fall into drugs and partying with drugs right hi so right but but by the way and also everyone else right yeah luckily for me like i have can't do that i don't have the i don't have the ability to do that it's not an option for me right um or they or a lot of

them get taken advantage of from a business standpoint i was doing business influencer business before i even made a fucking before instagram existed you know what i'm saying so like it's crazy i came into the city i've never had a manager I've never had an agent every to this day every half million million multi-million dollar deal I've ever negotiated

has been negotiated by myself if I need a legal team brought up I'll pay them by hand and they'll that is so shocking congratulations

well I don't recommend that to anyone no I do but it's just because I have a background I've been so fucked on by people that is so

that is like the best that's crazy. Because that's one thing in the world to take advantage of somebody like one of you. That's 1% of the city though. Congratulations. Like, honestly, that's fucking insane. I mean, it gives me a really interesting angle

and really cool understanding of the business standpoint because I was writing the contracts that I now read for myself. You know what I'm saying? And so like that made it very easy for me. I'm actually right now just getting into my first agency contract. I won't say which of the big three it is today, but it's – The big three.

It's, yeah. Well, CAA, WME, and – UTA. UTA, sorry. Well, I'm going to guess it's not UTA because we forgot that one. She's smart. She's smart. I don't want any beef with her ever.

Ever again. So do you feel like you guys' beef was genuine like were you both a little mad at each other I did Mike Malek hit you here's the thing

Mike Malek punched me in the face I did that part's not untrue I did so we were at a party at the old

Clybourne house at the Bieber house and I think I was talking to Tana and I like spun quick or something like that you guys were doing a handshake and you both you punched me in the face too oh it was both of us deck me together and we like pulled back and all of a sudden she's like

bleeding and she and fat lip bleeding okay and it was fun like it really wasn't that big of a deal but I needed I just you have to understand I needed attention in that moment it's broke I did okay my lip is bleeding. Like pay attention to the fact that you guys just punched me in the face. That was like, that was my mindset. We got off to a very bad start. And then this, this other. Yeah, that was, I think probably my first time ever having met you.

This other influencer girl comes up and I won't say when you guys are good friends now, but she comes up to the situation and you would just clearly like, but it's not. Dismissed. But it wasn't like a purposeful dismissing. It's kind of like me. You're adhd to party a million things going on like it just something was distracting you and you tried but you failed because you guys were already like really engaged in a conversation so he was like okay we'll worry about that after it's done awful um but anyways this other really big influencer girl comes up to brooke and brooke's like oh my god my lip is bleeding no she comes up

to tana you're awful i'm sorry everyone's just my lip is bleeding. No, she comes up to Tana. You're awful at talking. I'm sorry. Everyone's like, you interrupted Tana. Anyway, she comes up to Tana. She's trying to talk to her. And Tana's like, hold on one second. Like, her lip is like bleeding. She goes, I don't fucking care. And keeps talking.

And for months, I was like, that's it. They all heard that, too. I'll bleep it. I'll bleep it. I love her now. I love her now. It could be both of us. But yeah, we started off on a poor foot but then like i think we we hung out a couple times after that and then um you guys were you guys were getting into the podcast together and you had

a lot of questions for me one night about how business works between partners i did i well that's funny because i was going to logan asking the same questions you're going to mike and i was asking well because we were the co-hosts that were brought in so we have this revelry together i'm like logan do i pay her yeah i felt like i had like a bond with mike because i was like i can ask him these things because i felt like like in the beginning you had to have been in like a similar position so i was like asking him all these questions i was like mike's my boy okay and then of course like the whole situation happened and i like i really came on here and when like i said i really believed what i was saying like i love even if i didn't see it's important it's important to note that even had it like had i had she told me like listen i need you to lie for me i would have done that too

i don't care because listen if she tells me i need i need you to say I did this, I will say it. Are you guys friends now? Us? No, no, no. I love her. I love that girl so much. She did so much for me. That whole situation was really sad because I really do really care about and respect that girl. She's a sweetheart.

I prefer not even to talk about it today because I did meet with her after and she was very upset about the situation you know and I talked to her for a while see that's why I felt so affected by it that's why I felt like I had to come on here and defend her because I like she I don't know like you said it's not good to talk about it but just know that she is a good person in general

did that one hurt you to say? no she really is speaking of hurting to talk about someone being a good person i wanted to revisit this earlier when we were discussing your love life situation i'm just dying to know we've had some conversations about this but i and i think it's a fun podcast topic and i just want to know and i and i want to have a little fun today and just say it all right i just want a little lead up guys get excited um miss Amara. Miss Lana Rhodes. Great girl. Where do things stand now?

You are not the father, yes? No, yeah. Not the dad, for sure. I think that's already been confirmed just by the overall look and style of the child. Not the style of the child. He doesn't wear the same kind of clothes as me. He has more style than me. He definitely has better hair.

Would you ever get back together? You know, I never say never about anything. But at this current moment, like, it's off the table. We, you know, we did this little dance post relationship where we were going to be friends. Well, even beyond that, because, of course, we had that whole dance where it's like the toxic, like, you know, we're going to make this work and then the fighting and all that stuff.

But then even after that, where we were like, okay, let's like do this kind of for content a little bit or just like see if we could just be friends. You know what I'm saying? And like, let's just see how this works out. It's so hard to be friends with someone you love. You know, I figured out,

I tried to tell all the people in my audience that it's possible and it really is kind of hard. It really is. I was just going to ask you, I don't know if it is. I mean, for me personally, I don't think it is possible. I'm learning that.

But that's the thing you have to, for me, I would have to remove myself from the situation and no longer feel like I love this person or like am in love with this person for me to be able to be your friend. No, a hundred percent. I'm learning that. Cause I've asked this from, you know, olden days where like you talk to him now and it's like dude so good cats yeah and you are genuinely so like interested to know but

it's like it takes time for sure yeah 100 but we but we um you know I'll still always check in I do think it's very admirable how supportive you've been like even like when she was pregnant anyone I dated would be like oh fuck you and that thing and i and i feel like to me like like where i am right now i if like one of my guys like went off and had a baby i would not you know i you know we'd already been out of the relationship for such a long period of time i think like you know even even when it came to the breakup video or like the stuff when we really started to talk about we had already so so so full transparency she really hadn't and and she she had the right thought and was holding on and and saw a future and saw like a lot of positive things and i just we we we had

disagreements and we had reasons why it just wasn't going to be a good fit. And I think I was a little bit quicker on the decision making process to get out of it. And so and so like, you know, it was it was easier for me to disconnect after the relationship ended. And so then when she got pregnant. You'd already kind of been in the mood. I mean, I was in shock obviously like I was I was just like what the fuck how did this happen but also at the same time like you know

she the girl has had already accomplished so much had already put so much money in the bank had already traveled to every fucking country in the world she's very motherly she wanted a kid it was like she was telling me every I want to have a kid I want to telling me every I want to have a kid. I want to have a kid.

I want to have a kid. I want to. So when she gets her, that's fantastic. When she has a kid, I'm happy for you. What can I do to help you? And that's big. You know what I'm saying? That's kind of where I was.

So I moved her out to Chicago and now she's like in New York or something. I think that's a good story arc for you and your maturity, too. That was really a point where you really showed the world your maturity. I think it's funny because you're saying all this and it's so valid and I couldn't agree more. But it's funny because like I sit here as like at one point

I really was a stan of you guys as a couple. And I think that we don't talk about enough like how affecting it is on you when you're in a major massively publicized couple that everyone is in love with

trying to date again after that. Trying to like even just chase that feeling of being like on top of the world with someone else well this situation is made dramatically more difficult when the last person you dated is considered to be one of the most desirable people on the planet you know what i'm saying and so it's it's it's become slightly problematic for me because it's like shit shit, I, you know, I hate to say it like this, but it kind of like sets you up for, like, you kind of have to like hit a certain. Caliber. I completely. Do you feel that way though?

In an immature way, yes. In an immature. Like an ego way. Ego, social media owned way, yes. And when that's your business and your life too, it's like, I completely understand. That's hard too though. Cause like from the other side of it, anybody who's going to come in to date you is going to be so just by default insecure.

In my opinion. That is, now I've already dealt with that. I've already dealt with that a ton of times. And I've had girls that I've started like these kind of slight relationships with or like, you know, when you get into a situation where you've, you know, you've had sex with the person a few times. Now you're like, yo, let's go get. Yeah. Well, technically you should.

You're supposed to start with dinner. But yeah. I really. You're trying. You're trying, Mike. You're trying. But like, but like, yes, that is definitely a situation like, dude, like the whole world knows who your ex is. Like generally speaking, like you're able to navigate through the beginning of a relationship with kind of an unknown situation about who the person's prior lovers are.

Like, no, it's hard. It is very hard. It just adds another dynamic. Because there's always going to be some subconscious, like part of you that is going to compare. I mean,

maybe, maybe not a hundred percent. Like, I don't know, but I've learned, but I've learned that, that, that is,

that is so childish. It's the devil. And, and you know, I've, I don't know. But I've learned, but I've learned that, that, that is, that is so childish. It's the devil. And, and, you know, I've, I've, the relationship has taught me so much. You know what I'm saying? It really has taught me so much. And like the, the, it kind of was, you know, not to sound like, like kind of like a male douchebag or a dick or whatever, but for me, it was kind of like the cap on my desire to want to be with people for looks.

Because I was like, okay, now where do I go? Like, where do you go from there? That's a real thing. I think people like try to get that out of their system. I've had that, like this same, like a similar conversation with a lot of like my guy friends. It's like at a certain point, you're going to settle down with someone probably

that like superficially isn't someone even that you like would have wanted to go for, you know, five years. Because you learn it's more because yeah, none of that fucking matters. And like, I mean, but literally none. That's the thing. Like, of course you have to have like a sexual attraction to your partner and that's not a question. Right. But like the, the, the actual like value of, of looks in a relationship is so meaningless because they fade or they – and that's not even the reason why.

The things that you're looking for in a partner are enduring factors and ability to cheer you up on a day, a trustworthiness. I understand you. Now the thing is, is like the reason why I was in that relationship was because she also exhibited many of those factors like she's like i feel like she's very like she's an example of someone who's beautiful but like very smart very like smart and then the biggest thing with her which which is like i think the only way i probably find this again would be either outside of the city or just like someone that's not on the scene is her loyalty was on was there wasn't a single person in the world that could have got her to look away from me if she was staring into

my eyes yeah you know what i'm saying like this girl this girl was don't just break my heart in half right now for the love of god call her back my but no it's not but that's not but once again that's one vertical yeah that's one vertical so So, so like, let me throw this out there. If you find someone who's fiercely loyal, but is also semi-jealous or like not saying that she was, but like, you know, semi-jealous or, or, or, you know, has the occasional desire to watch it all burn, like who knows, right. Or, or, or so one thing I've been looking for in a, in a mate lately is someone that I can bring to events or someone that I can bring out with me. I'll be transparent with this one and say Amara, uh, Amara, whatever you want to call

her, like however you want to say it was very focused on, uh, that home life that she was trying to curate for herself and that family life. And you weren't, I charge up off going out and meeting people and networking and being in a room and shaking hands and meeting this person and you know how can we work together how can we get money together blah blah so on and so forth and there has to be a i kind of wanted someone that could do that with me to be honest with you and that could come out and like say i go on like a group vacation with you know your two lovely boyfriends and we're skiing and i say girls like you got we're gonna go do some like gnarly shit like where we jump off a cliff guys go shopping i'd want them to be able to like have like a cool relationship together and so yeah yeah i don't know no i mean that's a realistic

thing though because it does have to fit into your life like as much as it's like okay i could find just like a normal person who does normal things and like that'll be like that's how i'm gonna settle down it's like you you still live this life you're like obviously very successful person and in like the creator that's definitely my like biggest thing is yeah you have to understand my life amazing like you can go find out like find a financial advisor or something but it's like it realistically I hate everything I do yeah Bet on sports, play it on a field or ice or course. BetRivers is the place. Over, under, money, line. Same game, Paul A's, it's all fine.

We'll put a smile on your face. Bet on the sports you love with BetRivers Sportsbook. Take a chance. Must be 19 plus. Available in Ontario only. Please play responsibly. If you have questions or concerns about your gambling or someone close to you, please contact ConnexOntario at 1-866-531-2600 to speak to an advisor free of charge. It just wasn't the right fit. Like, simply put, it just wasn't the right fit.

It wasn't the right fit at that time. It wasn't the right fit for us to go on. So now what are you doing? Well. Who are you fucking? Well. What you doing? Shit.

I mean. I want to get impulsive here. I want like some. Well, you know, I've never been one to like go out and just start dropping like names and shit like that. But I mean, it's, you know. We're trying to do less of that as well. Seriously.

I've never been like that. I mean, I, you know, I've been. Have you been seeing anybody? No, not really. You know, I have. Do you have a crush on anyone? Someone's heart just got broken. Someone's watching this.

Nah. And yeah, for sure. Like that. That's. Someone's watching this. Yeah, for sure. That's the thing. But I'm very upfront and straightforward with the girls that I have. I wish I got that. I'll have guys be like. I don't fuck with that.

Me neither. I think it's disgusting to break people, to fuck with people's hearts. It's funny because my mom is honestly my biggest role model. And know? And honestly, like there's no one that's even close. Like she is like the leader of the majority of decision making I have. And that includes, you know, kindness towards people, empathy, compassion. And she taught me a number of things. She told me when I was very young, no tattoos, no motorcycles, and no cigarettes. She missed a few ones.

She didn't tell me about heroin. She should have said heroin probably. She didn't say crack. Mom, where were you on those ones? My mom said heroin and crack. Yeah, smart. But she also- No, my mom.

Oh, never mind. But she also like very early on told me not to play with people's hearts. Oh. Because, you know, my parents divorced and she probably dealt with a fair amount of that type of activity. And so, um, it's something that stuck with me. I'm, I'm just super upfront with girls. I'm like, yo, listen, like, even if like we go on a trip together, like any of that kind of stuff, I'm like, yo, just like, you know, you go with these guys. Like I have, I've had guys just like play house. You know what I mean? It's like, you're acting like you act like a boyfriend you talk like a boyfriend

we like you know and then we go to Miami together and you're like fucking a bitch and I'm like what that's not based on true events no no I'm like still pissed but I think but I think to the point that we made earlier on with like manifesting and direct and like your direction

lately I've been making a really trying to make a better effort to not even do that kind of casual stuff because it kind of sets up like a, well, not only that, but it puts you into that behavior stream. And so if, if your behavior is okay. Cause by the way, like there was a while where I had it down to a science, like, yo, we're going to this bar we're getting you know tacos you're getting we're having margarita like whatever right like yeah and then and then you

know what I'm saying this happens xyz happens and it it's just like it's this unfulfilling cycle of just like and by the way there's a lot of men that can relate to the story that I'm telling you now like you fall into this fucking cycle of just like these meaningless relationships and it's convenience yeah 100 you know so lately i've been trying to not even do that and just and just be like okay very transparent before before i hang out with a girl do i like this girl enough to have a conversation with her with absolutely no potential for sexual intercourse yeah do i have the do i have uh enough you know like though i feel like this girl is knowledgeable enough to hold a conversation.

Would I want her to meet my mom? Like I'm starting to have those conversations with myself before I hang out with her. Congratulations. Or like. A little precursor. Just a. Congratulations. Avoids conflict.

Honest to God. I mean, I do think after all of this, I would love to see you be a father though. I do. I think you'd be a good dad. Oh, I feel like you'd be the best dad. Yeah. Cause you're very, you know, you like you do your little like, I think you'd give good lessons. You've lived a life. You give me

very TED talk. Yeah. And like, you know, that's what I'm trying to go like outdoors. You could do a TED talk. No problem. I got invited to do TEDx, but I didn't do it because I have a supreme problem with mental illness called anxiety. Have you guys heard of it? Oh, I've heard of it. Yes, you it's we were talking about on Jeff

FM. I think it's perplexing that you do as much as you do like live shows and shit without like with anxiety and still doing it. Imagine though how much we could do like in life if, if anxiety like just didn't exist, like how much, how, like how many limitations. I've been trying. That's another thing I've been like, honestly, the, this year and even like every year is, but this year especially has felt like a a developmental year and a year of growth for me where like even on that tip i'm i'm finally starting to work on it

and um and and this will go on to the next how do you do any of that stuff obviously good for you the only thing i could do is i've had my ons and offs with um ssris and snr or ss snris um you know SSRIs and SNRIs. You know, I've tried all that stuff and nothing ever really worked. So now I'm not on any kind of medications like that lately, but I've been trying to like find a bunch of different coping tactics for it. Because honestly, like for me, it's not something that,

it's not something that like pops up and is like on and off where it's like, okay, this is going to happen. This is something I deal with pretty much all day long. You know, from the second I wake up into the second I go to bed, it's a cycle of, you know, negative thoughts or a cycle of, you know, you're not good enough. You're not going to do this. You're not going to do that. Like you're, you're here because of this, because of that. And it's,

there's nothing that is more dangerous of a habit than conditioning your mind into that type of thought pattern. Yeah. And it's like and it's just constant. All day. And so, like, yes, it really starts to, like, manifest into physical symptoms prior to big shows, live audiences, speaking gigs, stuff like that.

And it sucks because it's to an extent, you know, handcuffed me on a lot of that stuff because I have had a lot of really big speaking opportunities because of the book, especially. You just have to turn down just lot of that stuff because I have had a lot of really big speaking opportunities because of the book especially um but you just have to turn down just because of that yeah kind of yeah do you feel hard I'm sorry I was gonna say like like because I've done like the whole antidepressant thing like and stuff like that and it's it's hard I feel like now I don't know like when what your time period was with that but like now thinking about it I'm like how to if at this point i felt like i really needed to do that it's like now we have these jobs that are dependent on us having a

personality and like i mean you've never taken anything like that but i like my experience with like i i did lexapro too um i did well buterin well buterin was my like like i landed on that one for you oh so well it's a shit show of a drug it's so you so then you definitely have underlying depression yeah so mine was for depression i never had anxiety until oh got it because well butren's the i i they tried it on me one time sorry sorry go no you're fine they tried on me one time but it made me flip out because it it's for depression so it elevates whatever is going on in your mind yeah see mine was very much like the at the time that i was taking it was depression only i had no anxiety at all which is i didn't like have any understanding of that at all

i like whatever but it it worked for what i needed it for at the time like at the time it was like i like i i it was non-negotiable i needed to have that however no personality like i was i wasn't making jokes i was i was i was yeah and it was the trade-off and it was worth it to me to not feel the way that I did. But if I had that now, like I could, I couldn't have a podcast. I couldn't do what I do because it's like no sense of humor. No. Like, and so I'm thinking like now, if, if, if I were to come there now, it's like, what, like, what would we do? I relate to you so much on, on a lot of stuff, Brooke, like honestly,

like that specifically um because i have have always had that option as well i've always had the option to go back to effects or to go back to lexapro and it would allow me to live uh a little bit of a happier life and be a little bit more peaceful with myself but it would also deteriorate my ability to, uh, go from topic to topic, be snappy, be witty, make jokes, talk about like having a train of thought. That's very, um, you know, you know, uh, always on and aware and it's, it's, it's fucked up because at the end of the day, what it comes down to is us and our desire to trade our peace of mind and our happiness for the audience and for success and for the industry.

I always say that. It's kind of fucked. If I was heavily medicated, I would be far more mentally stable, but I would forsake so much of what I have. I've always, always said that. It is to a certain extent, we benefit a little from the little quirks we have.

No, for sure. If I wasn't manic, I'd have nothing. Like, you know what I mean? If I took away that mania with medication, I really do think I wouldn't. Because, like, that's where everything I do comes from. Yeah, and there's something to be said. Obviously, like, you need to be able to identify and acknowledge when it's, like, it's too far. And, like, I need to fix this.

But, like, at a certain point, as long as you have, some kind of balance like i feel like i do benefit like the adhd like all of that part i like i'm like oh i like that it like it helps me it's like it's fun it's funky like i'm because i don't have a sit-down job where i like i where i'm required to like sit and do something all day long like that's not yeah i'm like great i think the message from it too for like people because one thing i've noticed obviously having written the book and talked about this on every podcast and people know, you know, that this is something that I suffer from. I think like the takeaway from it is like kind of what you just said. And both of you guys just said, which is that your quirks are what make you, your quirks

are what make you who you are. Like me, me not being this like random, like fired up, like psycho, like that, then my personality is gone. And now I don't have that thing that makes me who I am. This like kind of over the top, like energetic, high energy, positive person that makes people feel good about, you know, when I walk in a room, like my goal is to elevate the situation and make people feel happy and make people smile. Right. So like, that's not to, that's not to say that I have anything wrong with, uh, that there's anything wrong with meds. And I think some people,

like you said earlier, at that time, it was important to you. And I think there, I think for certain people, they're important, but lately I've been looking for coping tactics and for anybody watching this out there that,

and I'm sure there's a lot of you guys that suffer from any kind of anxious condition. Yeah. You're suffering in general. Stop. I'm kidding. I'm sorry. I got bad jokes.

No, that was funny. And I appreciate your motivational. I need to be doing that more. That was funny. No, but just these quick tips. I'll just say. When you want to bet on sports, play it on a field or ice or course.

The Rivers is the place. Over, under, money, line. Same game, Paul A's, it's all fine. You put a smile on your face. Over, under, money, lines, same game, parlays, it's all fine. You put a smile on your face. Bet on the sports you love with BetRiver Sportsbook. Take a chance. Must be 19 plus, available in Ontario only. Please play responsibly. If you have questions or concerns about your gambling or someone close to you, please contact Connex Ontario at 1-866-531-2600 to speak to an advisor free of charge. Just these quick tips. I would just say exercise. Cardio for me it doesn't work for everybody but cardio has always been

I have to work out every day. If I don't work out in the morning I won't survive. Literally. I love hiking. Yeah, that works, right? And water.

But everybody doesn't need it. Maybe you guys don't need it. No, no, no. There was a point in life where I was doing cardio every day and I was far a happier person. Looked way better too. Seriously figured it out. out yeah um you're not wrong there are so many like little things you can do yeah there's a lot of steps before medication like for sure especially

like routine and like shit like that really does help and i find myself i find myself down on myself for that a lot because i'm like fuck you should just like literally be working out every day or taking these supplements or drinking a lot of what like a lot of those things really do help a lot so i i do validate that no you're right but but routine in general boundary setting boundaries for yourself if you have you ever noticed that when you do something if you if you suffer from anxiety or even depression if you do something far outside of your comfort zone or outside of your boundaries have sex with a random person have sex with an ex that you didn't want to have sex with over drink over eat over do overuse drugs have you ever

noticed that i say your anxiety is 800 sex with over drink, over eat, overdo, overuse drugs. Have you ever noticed that your anxiety is 800 times higher because you're walking over boundaries that you've set for your personal self and that you, when you, when you over walk those, it's true. The fulfillment, like, like just the thought of like, like not wanting to do something and actually not doing it, it makes you like, brings you back down. Yeah. Some level of discipline. Um, but then the last thing I'll say is just the one that I've really been working on for this year. And, and the one that every leader, every business, uh,

you know, uh, enthusiasts or entrepreneur or any successful person does is constantly talks positively to themselves. And, and that is so important in the management of those negative thoughts and that cycle and that pattern is to tell yourself the things that, and to view yourself the way that you want to be viewed by others. And so, um, at some point you're, you're how you think about yourself will eventually align with how other people think you. So that's just where I've been. You're not wrong. Tana laughs at me. I like, cause you know, there's people who do their like affirmations or whatever. They get up in the morning and they're like, I am beautiful. I am strong, whatever in the mirror. And it works for a lot of people. But for me, I'm like,'m like i could never but like we'll be getting ready and

tan that will make fun of me because the whole time i'm like holy shit she's gorgeous like oh my god and that's like the only the whole time no but it's good it's good to build yourself delivery of it it's very comedic i can't even lie i'm like have you ever seen someone so beautiful so fucking gorgeous i just want to girls girls are awesome for that like they hyping each other up nobody no guys like really do that enough but logan's the king of the the manifestation he he he's better than anyone at that he's got notes to himself yeah he's got notes to himself on the mirror he's got you know like he's just he just is always talking that way to himself i feel like like I want to get, like I'm still at a point right now where I take my, or I like, I don't want to say take myself too seriously, but I still like, journaling to me still feels very like, ugh.

I would love to journal. Honestly, I struggle with that. My biggest form of motivation, and this is so dark, is negativity. Like if I read a hate comment, like that would motivate me 10 times more to be better. And I need to talk about this in therapy sincerely than like a positive thought. If I tell myself like you're a failure, I'm 10 times better of a person. That's how a lot of people work like that. A lot of people feed off of negativity.

What do they say? My haters are my motivators. But even just to myself, like if I wake up. I think like Gandhi said that. If I literally wake up and I'm like. Or like Ross Perot or Obama. You're not wrong. I could sincerely wake up and tell myself like you're a winner you're so rich you kill it

like and all day I'd be like I'm a winner I'm so rich I don't have to do shit but like if I'm in the mirror like you're a fucking failure like whatever then all day I'm like I need it like I don't know what it is about that no I get that you were earlier I wanted to touch on this again but you were talking about how you suffer with depression until LA and then that's kind of what manifested your anxiety more was being in this city and being here. Do you feel did you feel a significant change being in Puerto Rico and potentially moving there compared to L.A.? How much of your issues do you feel like are directly hand in hand with L.A.? I've always had it.

If anything, like to be honest with you, like it's been an underlying problem my whole life and was actually a massive uh precursor and reason for me to use drugs you know what i'm saying the drugs quieted my mind they made me feel uh balance i'm sure you guys know this that like who can relate i was a huge fan of euphoria yeah so like i was a massive euphoria fan and it was for various reasons but there were some lines in that uh in that show that that really really really resonated with me to a point where i was like i loved what you were doing i'm sorry to cut you off but like what you were doing explaining how realistic that was because like i know that was for sure your experience was like from you more as like the point of rue i i experienced that as more of like her little

sister because like i grew up with it like my parents were both addicts that's what's crazy about euphoria though yeah but that's the thing. I felt Rue. If you have never experienced it yourself, I don't think you can appreciate the show for what it was because it is so realistic. That was a really tough, I mean, to that point. I mean, it was a really tough watch for myself.

And it was also a very tough watch for my mother and my little sister. Yeah. Who resonated dramatically with the characters that you're talking about, Rue's mom and R and rue's sister because they were i mean i mean some of that stuff was exact i mean some of that stuff was where she was where she was ruining the house looking for the trash and shit the whole scene is like it's like they called me and it was i think it was episode four season two and they called me they, yo, we don't think that's a good idea that you watched tonight. And I watched it and like,

I mean, that episode really fucked me up. You know what I'm saying? Like really fucked me up because, you know, the pain that an addict produces for their family members is kind of the last thing that you ever get over. And it's something that I still struggle

with quite a bit. It's like a guilt. Yeah. And I've kind of forgiven myself. But you're not you. It's driving's dry in the boat but yeah but people i mean they understand that bad time for me at least for me no i'm just kidding no but but but that that show like um they did a great job on it and and so like there was one line uh sam levin's incredible you know writer producer just incredible and um there was a there was a part of it where she said

um she was talking about the first time she ever got high after her dad died and she said maybe it was before but it was at some point around there and she said it was the only time i had ever felt safe in my own mind that was how she described it and for someone like me to hear that, it was probably one of the most meaningful pieces of cultural work that I've ever seen because there was nothing I really related with more than that. That was why I started doing drugs. It was to quiet the thoughts. It was to make the thoughts stop. It was to make that feeling of worthlessness or insecurity or whatever kind of quiet down. And so, you know, that show is incredible. That

show is incredible. And so a lot of that's so, so to your question, that stuff is always there, you know, has LA, LA actually, to be honest with you, has for me has been a little bit better, has made things a little bit better for me. And I'll tell you why. If you suffer from insecurity, if you suffer from feelings of worthlessness, if you feel if you suffer from self-confidence issues or any kind of those anxieties or negative self-thought or OCD. The greatest thing that could ever happen to you is to be validated. The greatest thing that could ever happen to you is to have people say holy fucking shit this kid is special wow this kid is special this book is has saved thousands of lives and it's five star rate is the highest rate one of the highest rated books on amazon and audible this kid has fucking done this do you know what i'm saying like and so when it took you're right i agree putting out works that i was fucking proud of yeah and that

other people were proud of for me to be like holy shit maybe there is a reason for me to be confident i agree with you 100 my first sense of validation was definitely being in atlanta like i never felt that growing up ever and you're actually very in just like a sense of like no like i don't know if you felt this way like in vegas or whatever but like in arizona i always knew that i wasn't supposed to be there and so coming here that helped with imposter syndrome yeah where i just like i knew that i wasn't supposed to be in this place and like i wasn't doing what i was supposed to be doing so even coming here but long before i ever was doing anything that i thought that i should be doing i just felt like more at peace because i'm like okay like i did something wait

you're right that's i guess my first sense of like peace with my life and its purpose was seeing the physical manifestation of people telling me like oh you changed my life oh your shit is your shit resonated with me that was like the first time where i was like oh maybe i shouldn't kill myself like you know what i mean so i completely agree with that that there is something about la that validates your your purpose and it doesn't have if you're doing this it doesn't have to be la i mean it was la for me but it was like i like i said you know to to the to the point of it it's like especially when it was related to uh value based praise like the podcast the podcast is so like when people tell me they watch the night shift i i love creating content for the night shift the burger reviews anything that makes you forget about your day and and and laugh for a little bit youtube i feel that great right you want to make

one person the podcast a level up from that where people say yo we watched your interview with dana white we watched an interview with arnold schwarzenegger we watched it or we watched your boys on the episode you guys hit some really tough fucking topics you talked about a lot of really good stuff you put out an episode about about george floyd that made people really fucking gravitate towards the show i'm like okay wow i'm having a fucking an actual impact here but it wasn't until the book came out and i was and people started saying to me yo like my life was marked markedly changed and i could i could show you exactly like here's my arms from six weeks before I read your book, track marks,

cutting myself. Here's, here's my report card. Cause I didn't go to fucking school because I was, I had such a bad fucking condition of anxiety or depression that I couldn't go to class. Here's my shit. Now this is me now. And it happened as a result of something you fucking produced. That was the final straw for me. That was where like, that was where like, anytime there was a fucking Twitter, somebody said L plus ratio. Somebody said, somebody said anything.

You're Logan Paul's friend. You're just a, I am bulletproof now. Invincible. It does, none of this fucking matters anymore because, you know what I'm saying?

Because you produce something that stands the test of time. You have a a work you have a body of work that represents you as a exactly yeah i agree with that i really do i love that for you i i definitely i agree i saw such a change in who you are after the book came out and i think that it's incredible it's it's a motivator within itself to show people to really like use your pain to hopefully try to help other people and you never know what it will do you know what i mean and that's that is that's my life's entire purpose maybe what i do isn't as meaningful as it could be maybe i'm not sitting here teaching a lesson with everything i'm doing but knowing i've ever potentially saved a life from any of my suffering or lessons is like why

i do what i do and wake up every day at the end of the day so i do feel that it's it's definitely a motivator to have people go out there and you know do something with what you've been through or lived and that's fire i love that when you want to bet on sports played on a field or iso course bet rivers is the place over under money lines same game paul a's it's all fine you'll put a smile on your face bet on the sports you love with BetRiver Sportsbook. Take a chance. Must be 19 plus. Available in Ontario only. Please play responsibly.

If you have questions or concerns about your gambling or someone close to you, please contact ConnexOntario at 1-866-531-2600 to speak to an advisor free of charge. Bro, it's funny because I knew today was going to be, we would go like deep. I told her I knew it was going to be like that. It's kind of my new tip. I mean, I'll definitely switch it up. Y'all want to talk about some fucked up shit no no i i knew you would like go in and i that's what i wanted i really wanted to come in today and just let you talk your shit about life and it'd be deep but you really you really hit that and i'm happy i'm really happy

with today's episode it's fun we were just shooting an episode before this talking about sugar daddy literally like the least meaningful episode of all time i'm sitting here and there's like seven of us on this couch and we're just talking about like lila sugar daddying in vegas and awful and i'm sitting there thinking mike malek's on the couch watching outside this is so embarrassing i was laughing at all of i thought it was great i was just so he had his time he was our age of course the one day meaningful mike comes in though we're having the most awful episode of Cancelled ever. History.

No, I like to remind people that like, like we had, we can, we can like maybe talk about like human topics. Yeah. I love the Ethan episode. Cause it was like, like kind of similar where he talked about like very like, sometimes it's just me and Tana being like shit or like, yeah. But also your fans love you for that too.

I mean, I mean. It's important to teach these lessons. No, for sure. Like you said, influence. Like no matter what we're going down this platform, what like there, we can throw in a meaningful episode. It's not the teach these lessons. No, for sure. Like you said, influence. No matter what, we're going down this platform. We can throw in a meaningful episode. It's not the end of the world. I hope so.

I hope somebody watching it felt something. Who knows? What's next for you? I feel like, can I make a prediction? What I think is next for you? Finding an intellectual property and or item in the food world. Yeah, I mean, it's definitely on the i mean if i there's no one in our in the camp that i reside within that could ever say what and if you ask

what's next for you they would ever give you one answer you know what i'm saying we're extremely diversified across multiple platforms verticals and and i guess what's exciting and next or like what are you passionate i mean obviously the second book is is unfortunately you know taking a look is going to take a little while because i'm juggling a lot it also is very scary to me to go back to a place where i have to write about stuff that makes me feel the way that writing makes me feel because it that's how you get to that place it's it's fiery it hurts a lot that's what i'm doing i'm getting like trauma like therapy like that makes you relive your trauma in order to write my book because i don't remember my life at all yeah like at all i don't remember any of my life at all so i get that like having to go dark like that is hard right so so book two is one thing just kind

of working through that with the agency um and then also any any potential for docu-series or or stuff around book one so we've had talks about movies we've had talks about docu-series or stuff around book one. So we've had talks about movies. We've had talks about docu-series. My movie would hit. I would watch it. And then obviously Impulse is going on the road. I think people probably already know that. Well, yeah, you toured, but is that going to be like a big, long tour?

Yeah, yeah. We're going to do a full tour. We'll be in your city 100%. The agency's putting it together with a big touring company. That's so exciting. Canceled on the road. I want that. That's a goal.

But I mean, you guys are also 300 episodes deep. Yeah, you guys are various seasons. And we've been forced to step our game up lately by a competitor, which has been great. And shout out to the Full Sim podcast, and they've been crushing it. And Kyle and Bob are doing a great job over there. Y'all gonna have Obama

on or what? It basically just told us, hey, listen, maybe I'm biased, but I think that we probably are on or what yeah you know it's it's it basically just told us hey listen like um you know maybe i'm biased but i think that we probably are we let's just put it like this we've been doing it longer and and you know we never want to get comfortable no of course not but but but i guess what i'm getting at is you know we we feel good about where the content is but we just need to step it up with the guests a little and and i you know really do i just watched that it was a great episode great episode so impulsive on the road book two and then to the food point uh yeah I think I want a restaurant from you I want like

a mystery yeah within the next six to twelve months I think we'll have brick and mortar burger restaurant I love burgers I love this bit for the podcast Mike's like yeah I was just breathing you're like I love breathing do you you know how serious I take the burger shit? Like, it's not like, like, by the way, like. I just recently, like, tapped in. You tweeted, like, a list of a bunch of burger restaurants that you love. And I was like, oh, he's really excited to eat now. Well, people think, well, people think that.

I didn't know that night I was inspired. People think that, like, this is, it's all, you know, Portnoy-esque, which in a way it is. You know, I mean, his ratings. He's not obviously the first person to rate food, but like. been doing it long yeah and he you know he's been crushing the pizza stuff but listen i was i was doing i had a food blog in 2013 i've been taking pictures of food and talking about food to people it is my passion is my literally ingrained in my soul and burgers were always the biggest topic and the and the burger stuff started with shake shack five guys in and out the the age-old debate around what is the best one.

Can you tell me your choice out of those three before you continue? I'm sure there's a little Fentana being a West Coaster. But I've always been Shake Shack first, Five Guys, then In-N-Out. And I can tell you why if you want. Tell me why. Five Guys wins. And that's the only right answer. No, I'm fine with that.

So I've always put Shake Shack and Five Guys in kind of a very whoever you pick one i just personally don't believe that in and out is that the same i don't think so i think it's underwhelming but i'll still eat it i'll tell you what so so so i i really like what shake shack does with uh the consistency of their entire package the potato bun is extremely soft the the burger semi-decent quality and the cheese is great the shack sauce is great on the shack burger and the fry the crinkle cut fries with the cheese sauce great. The shack sauce is great and the shack burger and the crinkle cut fries with the cheese sauce are incredible. So I put that kind of at the top. If I'm really hungry,

I'll put Five Guys at the top. Very big burger, a lot of meat. You have the choice to downsize the meat, but the original by itself is two burgers. The cheese is always really good. The sesame seed bun is good. And the fries at Five Guys are the best of the three.

So the Cajun fries at Five Guys are incredible. Now, the deal with In-N-Out is this. It's a regional great. It's extremely affordable, at five guys are the best of the three so the cajun fries at five guys are incredible now the deal with in and out is this it's a regional great it's extremely affordable which is amazing i think a burger there's like four dollars or something like that right um i just i i i think the fries i think the fries should not even be put out i i don't believe the fries should even be released to the public i think they should be put back into whatever cauldron of hell that they came from. Right back up in that potato cutter.

And leave them. No, because they're not. Do you know what they're made of? What? They're not potatoes. I assure you, I'm telling you from the bottom of my heart, they collect Barbie playhouse boxes

that the Barbie playhouse has put inside. I should think I read that somewhere. And they shred them up and they use the shredded Barbie Playhouse cardboard to create what is the shake, the In-N-Out French fry. Now, the way they make it acceptable to eat it is by topping it with so much shit. Cheese, diced onions, the special sauce. And it's delicious. It works for me. And it's delicious.

It's great. Don't get me wrong. But the fry itself you think needs prison who's the guy who does no he needs to go back to hell he needs to die dude you know who I'm talking about the like heavier set guy

Action Bronson yes Action Bronson fuck that's delicious that is my dream job that is amazing have you ever seen it it's like a show him and all his friends

go basically they travel and they like do like a video series and it's just like it's a bunch of funny people basically eating food eating like amazing food you're a cultured little son of a gun aren video series and it's just like it's a bunch of funny people basically eating food

eating like amazing food you're a cultured little son of a gun aren't you oh it's my favorite favorite thing ever and it's that to me I can't imagine a better job in the world

we just started a food review show I'm trying to chop in I caught the impulsive anyway but the thing is they'll eat anything like there's no there's no cap but they go and they talk to the people

about like the culture like everything behind it like what they're doing in the kitchen like it's actually giving diners drive-ins and no no so what it is it's your Ashley Bronson's show is incredible the culture, like everything behind it, like what they're doing in the kitchen. It's giving diners drive-ins. No, no. So what it is,

Ashley Bronson's show is incredible. Basically what it is, is somebody I see a lot of myself in, but I don't even like saying that because I'm so insanely humbled by his even living, but Anthony Bourdain was one of the greatest humans on the fuck ever. I mean, this guy was fucking incredible. He was, he was extremely sharp,

extremely ahead of his time, uh, romantic with the way that he talked about food, romantic with the way that he talked about traveling culture. This guy was a monster. And for me, you know, East coaster ex heroin addict, uh, someone that has continued to play then not play with alcohol, someone who's had their problems with, you know, East Coaster, ex-heroin addict, someone that has continued to play, then not play with alcohol, someone who's had their problems with, you know, relationships. I mean, this guy, the amount of mirrors to myself I see in just his shortcomings in life is incredible to me. But the fact that he also loved food, loved travel, loved culture.

So the hole that Anthony leaves behind, has left behind, has always been something that I dramatically would love to fill. And that's such a, I could never do that. Like he's a god. But it's someone good to look up to. Correct. 100%.

Correct. So that's where I hope I go. I could see you doing that. I feel like that's, I don't know. You're so well spoken the way that you explain things and describe. I think they're overshooting.

Honestly, no. You're selling yourself short. I think a food showhooting. Honestly, no. You're selling yourself short. I think a food show would hit. I do. Don't we all. Don't we all. Seriously. Five guys, In-N-Out, or Shake Shack.

Five guys. Five guys first? Five guys. In-N-Out's first for me. Really? You're a West Coaster. You've been bred into that belief. It's familiarity.

It's a regional great. You know there's people down south who would tell you hey now. I'm not doing accents. Hi now. You almost killed it. You completely have forgotten about the actual greatest of the burger chains and they'll say Whataburger. I love Whataburger. I fuck so hard with Whataburger.

I don't know what you're about to say. If you're about to slander Whataburger just shut the fuck up. It is so good to me. But it's comparable to McDonald's. Thank you. Thank you. Oh, it's giving Burger King Jack in the Box.

Yes. So I will skip the slander today. But to your point, yes, it should not. If anyone who ever mentions it in the same sequence as those three is. You're right. I should have let you speak. It definitely is more on the wave of like the McDonald'sdonald's but anyone from the south would just be it's crazy i fuck so hard with the whataburger i swear so do i the mustard on it could just fucking absolutely deck me in the

face wind it up and hit me wow i'm starving with all that being said we're all about to go out yeah are we hide tonight wherever you want to go i'm gonna go find my wife there you're not finding your wife at Hyde. I'm finding my wife at probably Air One. Air One. Or by the way, ladies. And I'm West Coastified. You're finding your wife at Air One.

I'm not a fucking liberal. Stop saying that. Are you not a fucking liberal? I'm not, dude. He's unimpulsive. What do you mean he's not a... No, people think it's a very liberal program. No.

No one thinks that. No one thinks the polls are liberal we've we've had our moments but i'm i'm very we're not doing politics today forget it leave me out of the polls and the politics and the politics sincerely please thank you for having me on your show i love you we love to have you i think you're my favorite guest we've ever had is that rude to say to the other one my favorite person we've ever had for sure i will it's just an honor to be here and i know you guys have a fiercely loyal audience and i appreciate y'all watching the episode today and i hope that you could pull something that could help you guys in your own lives read his book read i'm gonna watch the night shift it's on amazon the fifth idol i'm sending it to my mom i have known you for for forever and i love our friendship i think we really started with an off-camera friendship which is rare out here

and we bonded a lot you were giving me heaping praises on jeff fm and i just wanted to do the same thing for you here like you were a great friend and a great person and i love you to death and i appreciate you coming in and getting deep with us on canceled and giving the viewers something they don't get often which is you know no slander some wholesome life lesson sorry like for like centering you you know seriously yeah the beef is over and now we're all going to the club negating everything we just said have an amazing night canceled listeners bye tanimotia is canceled a dwe talent production is canceled. A DWE Talent Production. Over, under, money, line Same game, Paul A. gets all fine You'll put a smile on your face

Bet on the sports you love with BetRiver Sportsbook Take a chance! Must be 19 plus. Available in Ontario only. Please play responsibly. If you have questions or concerns about your gambling or someone close to you, please contact ConnexOntario at 1-866-531-2600 to speak to an advisor free of charge.