Cancelled with Tana Mongeau & Brooke Schofield - 62: Meghan Trainor Opens Up: Kris Jenner, Jimmy Fallon, and the Cancellation Saga - Ep.62

Episode Date: November 24, 2023

On this episode of the Cancelled podcast it's all about that bass, we are joined by the lovely Meghan Trainor and Chris Olsen. We cover a range of topics from motherhood, to love lives, to meeting Kris Jenner and releasing her upcoming song with Jimmy Fallon. Download the DraftKings Casino app NOW and use code CANCELLED. New players can deposit FIVE DOLLARS or more and get a match of UP TO FIVE HUNDRED DOLLARS IN CASINO CREDITS. That’s code CANCELLED, only on DraftKings Casino Get 20% Off and Free Shipping with the code TANA at https://Manscaped.com Tana Mongeau Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/tanamongeau/ Tana Mongeau Twitter: https://twitter.com/tanamongeau Tana Mongeau TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@tanamongeaulol Brooke Schofield Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/brookeschofield/ Brooke Schofield Twitter: https://twitter.com/BroookeAmber Brooke Schofield TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@brookeschofield1 Brooke Schofield YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCzCVovj7tfqnV2lIkaVk35A To listen to the podcast on YouTube: https://bit.ly/CancelledYouTube Don’t forget to subscribe to the podcast for free wherever you're listening or by using this link: https://bit.ly/CancelledWithTanaMongeau If you like the show, telling a friend about it would be amazing! You can text, email, Tweet, or send this link to a friend: https://bit.ly/CancelledWithTanaMongeau Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Everyone's got a pro. Need tires? I've got a pro. Car making a weird sound? I've got a pro. So who's that pro? The pros at Tread Experts. From tires to auto repair, Tread Experts is always there, helping you with Michelin tires you can trust. Until May 30th, receive up to $70 by prepaid MasterCard with purchase of four new Michelin passenger or light truck tires. Find your pro at your local Tread Experts. From tires to auto repair, we're always there. TreadExperts.ca Discover the exciting action of BetMGM Casino. Check out a wide variety of table games with a live dealer or enjoy over 3,000 games to choose from like Cash Eruption, UFC Gold Blitz, make instant deposits or same-day withdrawals.

Download the BetMGM Ontario app today. Visit BetMGM.com for terms and conditions. 19 plus to wager Ontario only. Please gamble responsibly. If you have questions or concerns about gambling or someone close to you, please contact Connex Ontario at 1-866-531-2600 to speak to an advisor free of charge. BetMGM operates pursuant to an operating agreement with iGaming Ontario. It's my favorite time of year, holiday shopping season.

And if you didn't come to the Cancelled Podcast tour and get your merchandise there, you can get it online right now on sale. Hurry up and get yours before it's all gone. Link in the description. Are you in love? Can we please just open the episode like that? Hello and welcome back to the Cancelled Podcast. Sorry, I just took over like this is my show.

Are you in love? Don't move to Hawaii. I'm going to miss you. I took over like, this is my show. Are you in love? I, And don't move to Hawaii. I'm going to miss you. He's here right now, actually, in my room. He's downstairs. God, you're in love. She brought him back with her.

No, I came home. I said, I miss you. Please come. Very different. She doesn't even know his name. Is he a football player? No, he's not. No, he's not.

He's everything and more, actually, the sweetest human. You know how I know it's like bad? Because like, I normally want to be like a disrespectful piece of shit to a man. And I'm like,

no, I have to like, you know. How long has it been? Well, how long is it good he like makes you finish then all the time because i heard i heard you on another podcast like say that you were you would tell them like that's it i'm such i'm such a weird about that like if i have sex with someone and it's bad like afterwards i'm like so many of all of them yeah I did it for a long time and then I woke up one day and I was like you have to know and I'm helping you yeah teach them laughing at someone when they're not funny it's like positive reinforcement that they don't deserve I always give a laugh oh I can't I know because then they keep they keep saying I have to give a laugh she does I give a laugh I've sometimes I've sometimes witnessed her like give a really

nice compliment not that you're like So fake But give a nice compliment Laugh And then Regina Jones It's the Regina Jones She's like God

I hated that entire time While they were off We'll like grip each other's legs Under a table While they were off I can't fake it If someone Like I just won't

I will Even if I do a glam trial Like where someone's Like auditioning To do my hair for a show I'll be like You nailed it Me too And then they leave And you cry Never ever fucking again And you're like auditioning to do my hair for a show i'll be like you nailed it never ever again that was horrible my team was like we don't know how you feel yeah at all i

but i'm the same way i like can't stomach them thinking it's bad you know what i mean at all i like freak out i'm so happy you guys are here Thanks for saying yes I didn't know I was gonna be on this Until five minutes ago I'm so happy to be here Also I figured as much I was like Does he know that?

She's like yeah No And it was just us He wanted to Of course I did What are you wearing? Why do you look so fancy? I'm wearing Tarjay

I don't know Come on What are these shoes? Some I feel like they're Bodega They are Oh my god The shoes are actually So fancy I can't say for the next minute But they're kind of like They are Oh my god

I can't say for the next minute But they're so You don't know about this? You don't know about Daga? You can't say it You don't know about this? Come on Get with it

I'm so happy to be here I gotta remember that This is crucial No I Just wanna say thank you both Like How we met Miss Megan We were at the Tate McRae show

And I like Turned to the right And I just see like A lady waving at me Like a sexy sexy lady Over there being like Hi and I just think it's like You thought I was sexy?

Of course you're sexy I can throw up and cry I'm so happy Thank you Are you confused? She's so confused I'm serious She doesn't know All the Are you confused? She's so confused. I'm serious. She doesn't know.

All the time. All the time. She's like, I look like trash. We're consistently. She's like, I have no extensions. My hair.

I'm like, I look like Mr. Clean without a tape in it. You know, like that's hair. Wait, also, you were blonde

and I loved it. Yes. She didn't know it was a wig until right now she walks up and she goes, where's the blonde? I go, I don't know, in a wig until right now. She walks up and she goes, where's the bra?

And I go, I don't know, in a drawer somewhere. No, it looks so good. Really? I'm trying to convince her. I have been forever. It's the problem that I look like Michael Jackson without makeup on when I have brown hair. No, she doesn't. It's a delusion.

Says you in the mirror? Yeah, probably. No. Probably. I don't. I've seen you without makeup on every single TikTok and I love it. You're so sweet. I think it's in high school I had dark brown hair And this was before I had a nose job

And I was super pale So it was like I love you So I really looked like Michael Jackson And I think that's ingrained in my brain forever I'll always feel like I think that's probably the only person saying that You look like Michael Jackson I had a big crush on Michael Jackson

okay period I just get this I like own it fully that's why I'm the millennial that can't do the middle part

because that was me at like 12 very chubby and insecure with the middle part and I'm like everyone's like stop parting it

you old lady I'm about to switch back to a side part too I think it's like when you're wholesome you have a side part No I can't see myself You're not in a wholesome era

You rock it you rock it you look great I'm like thinking of a wholesome thing I'm like really trying to lean into it You do look like mother thanksgiving right now Mother thanksgiving is incredible It's adorable All you need is like the Selena Gomez blanket And a cup of coffee Trisha cosplayed it The sweater. All you need is like the Selena Gomez blanket. And to look out the window.

And a cup of coffee. Trisha cosplayed it. She got the exact blanket. What hasn't Trisha cosplayed? I think everything. A meme could drop tomorrow and she'll be on it today. There was this random photo, this random paparazzi photo of Addison Rae just like walking down the street reading Britney Spears' book. You can't do. You cannot walk and read. Nobody can walk and read. You can't do that.

Also, wasn't she halfway through the book and she had just bought it? Came out that way. And Trisha dressed up as that photo for Halloween. And it was like, how niche, how smart.

Like, it's so Trisha Coden. Smart. It's incredible. What did you do for Halloween? We dressed up as Monsters, Inc. Perfect. And we went to two houses with my babies.

I have children. Which one were you? You were so fucking wholesome and cute. I was Mike Wazowski's girlfriend, Cecilia. I didn't know you had a girlfriend. With the snakes. With the snakes in my hair. And it wasn't cute.

And we got barely a picture. You have the cutest babies. They're really long, too. The cutest kids I've ever seen. I was praying that they would come out of the car. Are you going to pop another one? I was like, no. You're going to put the car Seriously Yeah you said Bring them I was like Nar

You're not at all to my house They'd be running right now One of them And there's We just had a Friendsgiving here And I was like She walks in

I'm like There's a hair extension On the counter There's a bikini In the fireplace It's November There's sangria Out on the floor

Of the roof But this is what I would Like this is I walked in And I was like Yeah this is where Tina lives This is what everyone

Expects Yeah No this is a very in and I was like, yeah, this is where Tana lives. This is what everyone expects. No, this is a very tame version. I was impressed. 100%. I was just so scared. I thought it was cleaner than I thought. I called everyone today. I was like, kids, I'm gonna please come and clean right now. My good trainer's coming over. I was spiraling. It's like a version of the original Hype House. Oh my god.

That's an insult. I had a dream last night that I went to the Hype House and someone stabbed me I'm sorry That was a trauma dump Like Charlie D'Amelio Right Like it's Vinnie Hacker

With a knife I don't know You know that's where It wasn't the original But the second one Where you were neighbors with them That's where The first time I ever saw you

We didn't speak But I obviously knew who you were And I was so scared You went to the Hype House? I had like mutual friends It was when I was in A past relationship On the internet So I had like mutual friends. It was when I was in a past relationship on the internet. So we had some mutual friends who were there.

No, you were in a past relationship on the internet? I wasn't, I wasn't. But we had mutual friends there. So we were just, it wasn't, like the friends who were bringing us weren't, didn't live there, but we ended up at the Hype House. You were there and I saw you walk past. I almost said hello, but then i was like i can't i

can't right now um and then what was it what was i doing you were making videos like in that top little yard up there lopez brothers and like olivia ponton everyone's doing cartwheels i actually remember this day 100 and you were just wearing a large t-shirt white sunglasses I remember that so well the worst thing I've actually ever heard the problem was I was neighbors with them so everyone would come over like ready and I would just roll out of my pajamas

and be like stop who wants to keep me relevant like you know and it worked it worked and look where we are now you're like king of that Staying relevant online You so beyond Are I want to

We were asking about this earlier Can you explain the situation of how you guys Got together Childhood friends From Nantucket, Massachusetts So you live for fun So we live for fun He did visit Nantucket A lot Massachusetts So you lied for fun So we lied for fun No but he does

He did visit Nantucket A lot And I was like No no no In his childhood Okay here's So Okay the actual story

Megan and I Megan asked me to do her podcast And So I came over And we did We did that And then she was like

Let's make some Come with TikTok ideas And I was like I will And one of them was like let's make some come with tiktok ideas and i was like i will and one of them was like oh why don't we pretend we're childhood friends because i had grown up my family and i grew up going to nantucket every summer and i knew she grew up on nantucket so i was like we have that weird connection so why not like make it a thing so we photoshopped a photo of us. As children. We did it. We have multiple of us. We have multiple. We have a three-thousand.

I believed it. Really? Yes. The way you guys interact, too, is so loving and cute. We have the same birthday. Do you guys actually? When's your birthday? December 22nd.

Oh my gosh, it's coming up. She's turning 30. I'm not there yet. You're only turning 30? Yeah. What? Dirty. She already has two. She's turning 35. She'm turning 30 this year. You're only turning 30. What? Dirty and shorty. She's only got 35.

No, no. It's like you have two kids. I know. I'm old enough. No, no. You look like a baby child. It's just that like you popped them out already.

I'm trying, bro. I'm exhausted. And you're just like so successful. Because if I was older, I'm going to be so tired. No, that's so. I need two more

and I don't know how I'm going to get them in and out. I feel like this isn't going to make it into the podcast actually the more that I say it out loud you were just telling me um the brutal aftermath of you having a child but not so brutal oh my pussies oh she's she's talked about that all the time this would get me in the podcast yeah I texted my doctor on the way and was like what is it called uh she didn't answer um but there's a lot going on my pelvic floor so like all the muscles in your poompa and your butthole are like i clench all day like i'm anxious i'm like and that can be why killing though i yeah but i've had it my whole

life because my whole sex career right it was always like painful like yeah i'm 30 years old i have two children and a husband and i'm now waking up realizing oh when the penis goes in it's not supposed to hurt yeah it's like a lot of people don't even know he's hurt at all i said heads up i'm gonna talk about pussy today and he was like yeah as you do on canceled podcast no more people need to talk about it because i've seen like eight doctors and they like, this is very common. But because of society and because, like, you're a woman. Like, you just, like, don't speak about your pain and just, like, go through it. And I was like.

Yeah, that's why so many people don't even know. They think that's how it's supposed to be. Yeah, they think that's how it's supposed to be. And I thought. I was like, yeah, it's always hurtful. Can't they, like, go in and, like, fix it? Stretch me? I wish.

So, I have to do, like, a year of PT of some woman going in in and like like stretch me i wish so i have to do like a year of pt of some woman going in there and like dilating me yeah our best friend has to do that her name is jill and she's very gentle but she can't even go yeah she can't even go in there yet because my outside my lips have another problem that i didn't know what was going on. Oh shit. But they are like really. So when I would have sex it felt like glass. And I was like alright babe I gotta be real with you. I'd be a better person.

I'd be like such a better person if my life wasn't revolving around getting dick. Sure. Wait my life isn't revolving around getting dick. That's what I'm saying. That's why you're a better person than me. Do you know what I mean? I love him yes um

yeah so it felt like glass and I was like no scientifically something's probably fucked up and it was my chemicals are so mixed up

my hormones I have like no T no testosterone so so how do they fix that is there like a solution I went to multiple doctors

I got lasered the other day and I had to do it like two more times and then I have to do a lip filler like all the treatments I have to do eventually i can get botox up there to tell the muscles literally stop and then and then i have to do cream i haven't started but i'm going to take six months i'm like pussy anywhere i can't get botox i will i have to do cream for six months

um morning and night and a suppository is that what it's called where you put it in you and it leaks out on you and I was like six months? How do we make it four? And she's like

well you could do this laser treatment and I was like I'll do it. I don't have time for this. What is this? Star Wars is my puss right now. But I also

as sad as it is and how traumatic I was like oh 30 years I thought like ouchy and that's right. Like no but it's exciting cause I'm gonna finally

have like really awesome not painful symptoms it felt good sometimes but there is always pain you know but I was just like that's normal it's not so if you're having pain out there check with a doctor and you're not alone I swear to god I

known her for one minute though And we started having this conversation I was like That's how it is Because I was like I love you I love you Let me tell you all my plus

And we just bonded immediately Isn't it your job too? Yeah absolutely All the pluses So like if you're having pain I'll just worry about you No and I just knew in that moment I was like

I immediately love this woman Because obviously I've seen you my whole life And you're such an icon And a musical icon But you don't necessarily Always know what someone's personality is going to be like and you're just actually so funny and awesome and so is Chris. Chris has always had my back when you don't have to. It like hurts your brand I think how much you defend me. Never, never, never. I don't care. Did you put sunscreen on? I know I'm not getting blast blasted I'm so sorry, we are so not accommodating

I'm just kidding, I'm getting a nice little tan Do you have a boyfriend? Not yet, but maybe I thought you were going to be my sister, bitch They say I love you to each other No we don't I said that to my boy, I said that to my man I want to say it so bad though

Say it bitch, just say it I said it to my man, well I made him man I want to say it so bad Say it bitch Just say it Don't say it I said it to my man Well I made him say it first He said I'm enamored by you And I was like Enamored He's enamored

I wouldn't shut up myself I was like Because he wouldn't say it And I was like Just say it And he's like I think I'm falling in love with you How did you guys meet?

Through Chloe Grace Moretz The actress That's a really iconic way to meet I know dude i have times i'm like she's so cool um and she was dating brooklyn beckham at the time wait no i had no idea who he was and i was such a loser i had no idea who he was and i remember she was telling me like um yeah brooklyn's mom gave me this shirt because she has like a really famous clothing line and i was like that's so cool you guys like fit you're like the same size like i thought it was like her

own personal shirt and then i was like what is like victoria beckham clothing line yeah yes yeah and then i always remember too like the paparazzi would hound all of us and he would like chase after them and be very protective and i was like god he cares so much and it was like they were all probably after him you know and he probably recognized them yeah it's crazy how famous we are i'm so like that like do you ever like get like get a paparazzi shot but it's not because of you but you're like i'm so famous in the background have you guys seen brooklyn beckham's cooking videos of course they're my favorite i haven't watched too many of them he like blow torches his grilled cheese he like goes so above

on his hands you know i have a hobby i would sell my soul right now for a blow torch grilled cheese yeah i just don't feel like there's ever a situation where you have to do that i don't think there is i don't think there is but again when you have time on your hands like that, that's what you're going to do. I also have IBS. Who has a blowtorch in their kitchen? Do you? Yeah, I've just found out. Yeah, she's kind of got it all.

What do you mean you just found out? Hot girls have IBS, though. Hot girls, I heard. Yeah, that's a real fact. I know, it's like a real fact. How do you not have it? I probably do. Yeah.

Do you have consistent gorgeous poops? Yes. She does. Really? She does. But you don not have it? I probably do. Yeah. Do you have consistent gorgeous poops? Yes. She does. Really? She does. But you don't have it. I was like a constipated gal my entire life. No, yeah.

I'm definitely not constipated. What? But I'm irritable for sure. I take a lot of Colace and a lot of Miralax. Food. Oh. Oh, yay. Oh, no.

Boyfriend. Boyfriend because it's my BLT Are you here? Are you in the room with us? We can also cut this out Because I don't know if this is right Were you ever dating Jeff? No

Not at all I knew that Never You did it You did it I know what the smile is Okay I didn't know that Never Never No And you've never even No Nothing You didn't They made out You didn't No no no I know with a smile I just told him

I just told him the other day That I don't want to have sex with him Because I know exactly What it would be like And there's no need for that It would be too much Like what would it be like It would be like

Hooking up with your best friend Obviously the weird shit The weird demeanor Like would just weird me out I feel like it would be like Me riding him for like five minutes Like I'm weird me out I feel like it would be like Me riding him For like five minutes Like I'm not gonna come

And then like We're gonna watch Sports highlights after And like I love him too much To allow that to happen Okay And then he would fall

Extra hard I don't think so I don't know It's very like Brotherly sisterly We just kind of played up For the camera Because we just said

You would ride him Totally yes Understand Do you go right to the writing? No oh my god no That's like I think it would just be the set up there Is that for show?

No oh my god Are you ever like If you are writing dick like let's just say sometimes There's like something on the TV and you're like low key Just watching the show I watched all of Bridgerton like that. I'm not kidding. You wait, what?

I don't even want to repeat myself at all. She watched all of Bridgerton while riding Dick. Oh, that makes sense. Definitely not riding Dick. That makes sense. I thought I was just laying there. Oh, okay. Oh, you did it to yourself. Perfect.

I was going to say, that's like, no. It's like she's beaten it to. No. To Bridg That's like No I was like she was beating it No No Perfect Anyway Tell us about Kris Jenner What does she smell like?

Kris Jenner What does she smell like? Yeah She smells successful She smells Kind So how did you guys meet? Like when I saw that music video

For I Am Your Mother I did not Know you guys knew each other And I was just like so gagged. She's my president. Yeah, mine too. She's my queen, my everything. We got to work with her.

That was crazy. Yeah, a day with Chris. We have a mutual friend through my management. Yeah. And so my dream, I was like three months pregnant. I was exhausted. And I was like,

I just did Made You Look, like full dance video. I was like, I don't know if I have it in me To do that all over again What if we just had Like some other queen Do it

And like They're like Legendary mom Like Kris Jenner Yeah There is nobody else Really She is mother

And my team was like Not no And I was like Alright And then On my birthday I got the call That she said yes

And I was sobbing. Oh, my God. That was insane. What a crazy birthday. I'm 25. You're 25? Yeah. Hey, 98.

I know a lot of people think I'm 30. A lot of people think I'm 30. Because you just told me you were 30. I'll take it. I'll take that. Your energy gives 30, though. Like, very sensible very like it was the rehab at 19 oh my god

yeah yeah yeah it's chaos there are some fun points to it but yeah but then you just then you try to seek pleasure in like watching craziness go down you know she's not drinking she'll like force me to drink twice as much yeah i got more into post rehab i think because i was like i gotta live through someone now oh my god that's crazy that's a crazy clip yeah that's a take right there right when i got out of rehab your mtv show was a thing yeah Megan Trainor just looked at me and goes do you remember

when like you left Omari like at the hospital like after his surgery like that came out she goes I watched that in real time that came out five years ago on MTV and you were like you were fighting with your manager yeah it was such a toxic he was trying to be famous he got his septum done like deviated septum

but i didn't miss it i was just like late i wasn't picking him up i don't know you chose sleep over him oh no that is not shocking i'll miss you there's like there's so much obviously to like reality they were like drama drama drama and you were like i have so much going on i have a perfume that's coming out Are you ready for it Why did you know that It was You watched all of this I love her

Oh I love it I just It's so Shit like this is so mind blowing to me Like I I love YouTube And I love Yeah

Who did you like What first got you into YouTube Like what YouTubers did you watch Or love Or Are we going right now I loved watching Trisha cry In her kitchen floor

like i'm a chicken nugget i'll never forget that i was there every phase of trisha every single one it was just i also it was just so remarkable seeing everyone try to take her down over and over again and that i made a video a while ago i think like years ago where i was like trisha paytas has taught us that like you decide when you're canceled yeah no one can cancel you if you've decided you're not canceled because every time something would happen to her she just kept posting and just kept pushing through and now she has become like uncancellable and that's why she's so much yeah yeah that's literally i feel like you're there that's we were that's what we were going for with the name of this podcast swinging

and missing right because we were so scared like everything my mom is terrified right now she goes and so so this it's called canceled are they gonna try to cancel you a lot of people do think that it's like come on and get gotten canceled really yeah no one's come on here when was the last time you apologized online? Whoa, great question Christopher I remember one YouTube video of you But that was a long time ago

I think it just used to be a different time Apologize for the brawn Great crew neck, but Who's counting? It was the worst day of my life or anything What were you apologizing for in that video no no no no no no no i'll tell obviously but um i just think it's different now like you just have to sit down and make a whole apology video and that was the only way the internet would take it seriously now we come on here every week and i'm like hey sorry about that one thing i said last week at 40 like people just i think are more accepting to growth like they're

almost like the canceled narrative is kind of changing. Well, because everyone, I think learned that it just went in circles. Cause no matter what you, you say whatever and people are going to stay mad. The only thing that will actually get you back on your feet is like taking time off or just continuing on. Yeah. Showing growth. Yeah.

And like showing that you've changed or like i think every because you could say the one thing that so many people are asking you to do and then everyone's gonna say well that's a lie or you're just saying that because people told you to say it it's like right i'm listening i'm trying to hold myself accountable like everyone else is asking you yeah and you'll just you realize you're never gonna please anyone and that's just like a whole thing that i think comes with like fame or whatever yeah you taught me that you, oh, nothing on here is real. So it's all good. And I was like, oh, that's great.

What's real is like my beautiful kids. Yeah. Oh, stop. I need to get knocked up tomorrow. I want to be pregnant at the same time as you. Trisha and I keep saying that. Do it with your Hawaiian boy. I'll do it with you.

Oh my gosh. I'm trying. Please don't do it. I'll do it. You don't do it. Who are you going to do it with? For a second. Anyone.

Oh. Chris. I'm so tired. I'm going to have a little like artificial ensemble. Oh, and it would be so, like, I feel like you'd be so good at like the exploiting your kids thing. Wait. Don't do it.

No, no, no, no, no. No, you're giving birth and he exploiting them to the point of making them feel like they can't make their own decisions terrifying because we don't know what it's like for kids who have well not yet we know some, but who've since birth have been on YouTube. I guess some of them are 13 now and they're talking about it. I just think there's a difference in sharing your family because you enjoy it

versus sharing your family because you need to make money off of it. Right, right. Because it's been a thing ever since social media became a thing that people, they have a kid and they're like oh my god here's my kid Like I love my kid I'm gonna post something about him

See like that's what I say too If I wasn't famous I'd still post him Because he's so damn cute So long as your content is still centered around you I feel like it's fine It's when your kids are like the Family channels have always kind of given me the ick a little And then they're having their like toddler Do a get ready with me and it's like okay what if the toddler actually wants play-doh right you know like that like

let's just maybe implore that idea yeah yeah you and you can kind of tell i feel like at this point when it's been put on and parents are like having their children work yeah in a way and that's like that will always scare the shit out of me that's that's gonna be that's gonna be tough also if there's like if you're doing it and you're getting paid like make sure your kid gets paid too like give that start their bank account and give that if they're in that they're working give them money like don't just and i've seen kids who were famous like as famous actors and then their parents took all their money and now they're like adults and they're lost

in the world. Which is so crazy. Crazy. Like especially the like now there's so many great regulations on child acting but like years

and years ago. It's better. Yeah. It's crazy. It's fucking nuts. How was your tour? What's the craziest part of tour?

Oh craziest part? I hate tour. Don't reel it in come on sorry i love tour and i'm gonna tour this year in 2024 and i'm gonna drag your asses on stage and make you dance absolutely can't wait i will be there again in a heartbeat imagine the canceled podcast opens for megan, God. Why do you guys know everything? Oh, God. You have to, right? Yes, but no. Yes, do that one.

I'm like, yes, no. Yes, yes. Yes, we could bring it back. But you love Dora? I love so many aspects of it. I think it, for, I'm sure what you're kind of saying is it's not like you don't love the highs of tour. It's just very dreamy.

There's a lot of things that, you know. I've never done it with children. So that'll be different. Oh, yeah. Are you going to bring your kids? I can't be like two months without them. Yeah. So they're coming on that bus.

They're going to come on that bus. And they're seeing the world. Oh, but that'll be fun. That'll be fun, I bet. That is so fun. Are you kidding? We like, I feel like we like it. It'll be easier.

We're going to do a bus tour now. What did you do last time? What were you doing before? We were doing just planes and hotels. That's like the Jingle Ball tour. It was just a lot of like. Totally just like that. Getting from place to place.

That is hard to do. That's exactly it. So you've never been on the bus? You've never been on the bus? I've done a bus tour, but Brooke hasn't yet. And I think you just get way more sleep. Oh, on the bus You know

Because you're not having To airport and TSA And check in And do it every single day Are you flying private Most of the time But not on tour Because then it's just

You're flying private The profitability I'm not flying private anywhere Only if it's like a A banger deal A banger deal There's no such thing As a banger deal

Even if it's the cheapest Private jet ever It's always going to be Way too much money A banger deal. A banger deal? There's no such thing as a banger deal. Even if it's the cheapest private jet ever, it's always going to be way too much money to spend on a flight. I know, I'm kidding. It's never financial. It never makes financial sense. But you can find them empty legs where it's like, essentially someone owns a jet and they have to get it from here to here anyways.

How are you doing? Is there like a website you're going on? People do that for a living. Fully just like our jet charterers. Wow yeah don't you have like a billionaire friends or just the one that wants to be famous but i'm starting to realize that that's not my journey anymore billionaires yeah good for you right oh let's people so it wasn't fun out there it was fun um but you want to be the rich man I think that I'm at that point that I would rather just like Be around people who make me really happy

And not financially compromise Yeah I always used to have Did you get your joy? Right on my ass Megan looks at me before this podcast and she goes You have to stop vaping You're gonna have a poop sack Something bad's gonna happen

Is that like real? I feel like that's how We get cancelled Is talking about poop sacks It's killing them Faster than cigarettes Have you not seen The documentaries?

I have I guess But I just pretend They're not real You see the new one The jewel one? No I can't watch that one Cause I know it would like I'd be sitting there

Vaping hand watching it Do you quit when you do Your 75 hard? No Okay There's nothing hard do your 75 hard No Okay There's nothing hard About her 75 hard You're 75 soft You just don't drink

I just don't drink I try to like Do more during that time period Okay Like work out And like Try to read Listen to an audio book

Listen to me You don't have children Get up What Get up and Get up and do something Before I had kids What the

Was I doing What do you mean I wasted so much time Sleeping Oh no what what get up and get up and do something before i had kids what the what was i doing what do you mean i wasted so much time sleeping oh no i was just i'm doing that right now yeah when you have kids and you're up at six every day you're like what did i do before you don't what did i not accomplish before do you have no nannies i have one that um is there monday through friday from nine from eight to five. Okay. It's very helpful. It's not enough.

You know, like there's another one. So now that there's two, there's like no breaks. Yeah. So you wake up at 6 a.m. I mean, that's fair. That is really fair. Like on the weekends, Daddy Daryl's home right now with my mom.

I think I just love sleep more than anything else and not even in a depressive way. Like it's just the best thing ever. It's the best. Do you still have insomnia? So bad. you still do i how do you know that because i remember you used to like tweet out at like 4 a.m and stuff like that i would be in college and i would occasionally get up early to go to the gym and you would still be tweeting during your night out i went to bed last night at like midnight and i was like, oh my God, this is perfect.

I'm going to be so rested. That was a good time. Woke up at three. Oh, perfect. Didn't go back to bed till like 6.30. Just laid there and twiddled my little thumbs. Okay, okay. Eyes closed.

Wait, are you on your phone? No, this like, last night I was just laying there like actually just like eyes closed. Like, no, but I'm awake. I hate that. Oh, that's the worst. I've had that. That's what insomnia is?

And then your thoughts are just like, that can't be a form of insomnia. Yeah, what are you thinking about? What are you thinking about? Your love? Your guy's the worst. I've had that. That's what insomnia is? And then your thoughts are just like, that can't be a form of insomnia. What are you thinking about? Your love. Your guy's next to you. Wake him up. I was gonna,

but he was so peaceful. I can't have someone sleeping next to me. It's like, if I'm suffering, you will too. Wake up. You can't do that.

I swear to God. You can't wake someone up. Well, that's not fair. I say that to my husband. He puts something on though and he's so tired because of the kids,

but we put something on and we're in bed at nine It's gorgeous It's a beautiful life We're showered in bed Kids are asleep We're like And then we sit in bed

And we put on a show And he's snoring in five seconds It's always the snoring And I'm like Do all straight men just snore? Yeah I don't think so I hope not

Yeah No it's a thing I get weird too Like I'll just like Start hurting you a little In your sleep Like if you keep snoring Like I'll pinch you a little Yeah Like it's a thing I get weird too Like I'll just like Start hurting you a little In your sleep Like if you keep snoring Like I'll pinch you a little

Yeah Like it's like Oh I smell Yeah I'll just tell them Like you're joking And then You're dying right now

Next to me It works And they don't remember it At all And it's like Yeah no I can't Yeah Megan She's out of commission

At like 6.30pm Oh that's Well that's bath time I know not to contact anymore. That's bath time from 6.30 to 7.30. And if I get a FaceTime from her, I'm like, what? It's late night with Meghan Trainor and it's like 7.30. My managers, it took them like a half a year to figure out like from 6.30 to 7.30, you

do not FaceTime me because I am putting the kids to bed. Yeah. And they'll get too excited. Like, Rhylo will be like, phone? Phone? Who's on the phone? And I'm like, no one's on the phone and i'm like no no that's that's completely i've never suggested that we do something past like 4 p.m even because i know it's not and when i see her at night it's it's like a rare form i love a boundary though

you know like those are boundaries and that's and that's on period and that's why she's you know that that's why she that's also paris will never's why she's, you know, that bitch. That's why she, that's why. That's also, Paris Hilton will never give up and never surrender. And I love that about her. And that's why I love her forever. She always invites, vibrates? Invites me to her miraculous parties, like a day before.

And they're always starting at 10 p.m. You were like casually like, yo, by the way, I'm having the biggest Halloween party ever. If you want to come tomorrow, it's like whatever. And I was like, no. I don't have a costume

or a babysitter. And it started at 10 p.m. And you were like, if you're panicking, that's fine too. And I was like, I'm panicking. I'm not going to make it.

But she does want to be invited. I want to be invited and Paris always invites me. She just invites me to another. I've never gone once. I live and I go, yes, I'm still on the list.

But I've never gone and I'm just so grateful. I've always had to say no to Paris as well. Really? Why? Because I've never been in town. I've never had to say no to Paris. What the fuck?

I've done some of the craziest things. I actually, if I look at my whole 25 years of life and I think about crazy, like at her parties, like the things that go down there. See, I'm asleep. I even went to her wedding and I like, I kind of. You went to her wedding? Yeah.

I love that. That is so amazing. The most beautiful thing ever except I left early because I was sleepy. I was you. I was like, I'm getting up at six.

We gotta get out of here. Did you have a wedding? Did I have a wedding? Yes, and I'm redoing it too. Are you? Yeah, for my 30th birthday. Did you go to the first one? No, we didn't know each other.

Except for Ann Nantucket. I did know her. Except for in Nantucket. But I just did it in my backyard with a bunch of Christmas lights. You guys' friendship is so interesting to me and I really want to know. The wink was crazy.

Do you come up with all of her social media ideas? Not all of them so she goes rogue i said i know this is cheeky but i mean this is myself sometimes she goes rogue and you can probably go on her page and know which one she did herself i did the christmas one today for the most part yes i would say i'm here to promote my song with jimmy fallon wrap me up there's no way jim Jimmy Fallon's so good. He's so like talented. Singing?

And he's the nicest guy in the whole world. And he plays guitar. I'm trying to like go everywhere and promote the song. And it's a Christmas song. Yeah, it's really cute. And it's going to be on the radio everywhere we go. It is already. And so I called Chris like yesterday and I was like,

hey, I'm going to be in Glam tomorrow. Do you have any good ideas that I could promote for him? And then I create a little notes app of all of my ideas for her megan oh no megan november 19th oh my god and then it's just a little actually so awesome what do you know you're really hard tricks this is what we do i know um what like made you so good at this like what did you just always grow up on socials and kind of? Yeah, I guess just like general obsession with social media already. Plus I was like, when I was doing it just by myself, I would see like singers or famous

people get on TikTok and try to do it. And for the most part, a lot of them do not know what they're doing. Like unless you're like a Kim and North and you have a North, like you're not like they it's a hard interface to just like learn it's really totally tough yeah so i was like if i if i just had like access to that to like any of these celebrity social media and our videos like popped off our first ones we ever did and i was like we should do this more yeah i think like the first one we ever posted together got a million views in like 20 minutes and we were like okay i guess we should keep going do you do it for other people at all i do i do we encourage him to yes some of them yeah like yeah i would get so i feel like do not work for anybody else oh no no i see people's page and i go chris

you need to help them yeah you need to help them. Yeah. You need to help them. You know, there's like a, like people are looking for specifically, you know, I remember someone was like hiring for,

everyone goes, how'd you get Chris? I think like Normani or something. And they were like, they specifically used you as an example. Like we need somebody exactly like this for that. I've heard in big meetings, people are putting my shit up and being like,

this is the formula we need to follow. She has a Chris Olsen. All we need to get to get no matter how many thing you're talking about it was actually crazy it was like seeking like gay social media obsessed like chris olsen it was like actually like insane and we were so good insane i mean because like the requirement was gay too it had like he had to be gay it's an important point it's important i don't think i don't think i wouldn't put myself out there as like well i am like clearly just the best person to do this i think i'm just someone who like scrolls a lot so i know what someone should post yeah but there's like tons of people who would be able to do that as well we just linked at a perfect time it's also

a crazy gig too because you have to get to know the person so that's why being besties really helps i love you yes he's like you know when you talk about your anal fissures and stuff like or he's like what are you willing to talk about i was like my anal fissure and he's like this will be hilarious let's do a video about this or he's like you're so funny in this category why don't you show that more so it's really intimate job too yeah it like wouldn't have worked out if we weren't friends yeah because there are other people who if they're promoting a project i'll get called on to like do a little thing with them and i can work it out for a few videos but i can tell that it's like not gonna be a long this is not gonna be forced yeah nothing ever feels like forced yeah have you ever met a celebrity

that you just absolutely hated like i want another even if you bleep it can i just know could we bleep it um we can bleep it okay oh my god i i promise we can bleep it okay i did not love delivering coffee to you i'm sorry and i know i had a good experience i know and a lot of people have had good experiences with her but a lot of people have also had not great experiences with her she picks and chooses and um i did it i as soon as i walked in the room the energy was not good i know if it's not there i'll never be there and i'm never then just gonna be like okay well sorry i was being so nice and so sweet the whole time and her team very clearly was like also trying to get her excited about this but she was just like okay what am i what I? What? And I was like,

Oh no, I'm just going to deliver this. Like I, I've brought it from across the country. It's this little bit I've done. And then I like showed her a few of them. She's like, okay.

I've noticed it's really hard to explain to really, really famous people. Like what this world is. No, it is just like, I've always said that one of the things that kind of comes with this job is you meet so many of your idols and your heroes and not all of them are going to live up to the idea of who they are like in your head or just in general you know yes and i was like and i had i

i was like it's going to be really easy this is all i have to do and she's like okay sounds like you need me to direct this um and i was like and of course i'm i'm not gonna be like well no i don't and this is my i was like yes whatever we need to do for you in the moment but then it also did not perform well because i was and and i kind of knew it wasn't because i was like it this isn't this isn't that's happened to me a lot like with like working with the different like celebrities or tiktokers and they I kind of knew it wasn't because I was like, this isn't, this isn't the way. That's happened to me a lot. Like with like, working with different like celebrities

or TikTokers and they'll kind of hit me with that. Like, it sounds like you need me to like, let's do it like this. And then every time it like, I was like, if we just went with my vision.

Yes. And like, you know your page. Yeah. And you know how people react to your stuff. There's a lot of moments where he makes me do a video and I'm like,

this is garbage. I don't want to post this. Like, I don't think this will do well. And it's 10 million views. And you're like, do a video and I'm like, this is garbage. I don't want to post this. Like, I don't think this will do well. And it's 10 million views. And you're like, I'm like, come on.

I'm like, remember the last time you said that? Yeah. Now he gets me. I'm like, fuck. It was the one, one of the first times that happened was the one thing about me trend.

And she told the story about how she got paparazzi walking out of a sex shop with like bags of items. And she was like, I cannot post this. She was like, this is so bad. I cannot do this. I was so worried about how she got paparazzi walking out of a sex shop with like bags of items. Did you? And she was like, I cannot post this. She was like, this is so bad. I cannot do this. I was like, can you please just keep it up for me and see what happens. He's on the side like my cheerleader. Like, what?

Bingo, baby. Always behind the camera. I'm like mirroring what she. But that's awesome. Everyone needs that. I also told him like after 10 of them I'm exhausted so I'm like

yo I need 10 is crazy I know I was like I need you to be my fucking hype guy like I would change outfits and do what we would work all day

like I need you to be my fucking hype guy and lie to me and go you're doing great so now after everyone he's like you are gorgeous

you are beautiful you are talented and no one is you that's like the best thing ever can we just quickly revisit the sex shop? We should.

We should always. Sorry. You've never really told the story long form. Because there's a truth and nobody believes me. I will believe you. It's fine. I promise I'll believe you. So I'm going to just tell the real story

because she's old enough now. You don't have to name names Okay so My Whatever A family member Okay My cousin

I have many cousins You don't know who it is So I Like experienced Like sex was painful forever Yeah And my cousins

I was trying to Like I was trying to help Her with a sex talk And was like Yo sex doesn't even feel good Till like you're in your 20s Because I figured out

Like you can use toys as well Yeah And she's younger than me So she was like Trying to figure it out And I was like Just buy a vibrator And she was like

I can't just buy a vibrator I live on this island and like my dad will get the mail and i was like i'll get you one and for some reason i fucking went to the store while i was there i was like way too long to find out see the kids need to talk well not the children my cousins needed she was going to college i was like let's prep I was like everyone you need to wear a condom don't suffer for these next three years yeah I was like do not suffer and

you're very special I never got any sex talk so I really like was trying to help them out which I did and I don't know why I chose to go to a store

in person when I could have ordered them online like two day prime baby but yeah she was coming she was visiting I was like I'll be right back

I'm gonna go get something and then I got a bunch of stuff so my bag was big so it was a big black bag and we were just post-workout so we looked horrific it was me and my husband he was wearing toe shoes

so everyone flagged that immediately and I can't let this day down I remember seeing someone staring at me and I was like that's weird and I was like

I guess that was the paparazzi guy that is my favorite story ever didn't another another celebrity got pop coming out but there was like a huge it was a see-through bag and there was a huge strap on in it and her husband was with her I know Vanessa Hudgens got caught back in the day during like high school musical but I don't know who you're talking about I don't know but it was someone who was about to get pegged and it was like just I'm not my bags are nice and big black you know the last time I went shopping I was about to get pegged and it was like just see my bags are nice and big and black you know the last time I went

sex toy shopping I was buying a strap on and like a bunch of fans noticed me and I was just like standing there have you used a strap on on a dude

what do you think she sure has she sure has how was it my life was so boring no it's not you don't want what's up here Megan

you don't want you don't want to be happy when I'm happy how was it I don't want to do it so fun you enjoyed it yeah like you loved it and did he love it you shit all over your lips You don't want What's up here Megan You don't want You don't want You don't want to be happy When I'm happy I don't want to do it So fun You enjoyed it Yeah

Like you loved it And did he love it You shit all over your lips No one's gonna tell you I'll tell you Lick your lips I thought she meant You had shit all over your lips

Like in the moment She means no There's marinara sauce on you No it's like white powder Like fix it It's the bread Lick a lick a There you go

Just like the movies Okay Was it Was it your suggestion or his? Mine. Like I was just like, I really want to do this. He was down. Who was it?

No, it took a lot of convincing. Oh. Oh my lord. There is no amount of convincing that should work in my opinion in that sense. Well, no, it's not shameful. It's not shameful. Stop shaming us, bro. Listen, come on.

I'm not shaming anyone. What do you and God do every time? Yeah. He stretched it. You know what? Good point. I just happened to know it was bright pink. Oh, you were there.

Yeah, I was there. I was directing the scene. Perfect. Oh, man. Anyways, the weather. Wait, was it a boyfriend or was it a fling? I don't want to make it to where the people could find this person, you know, because I don't think that's their journey.

Oh, my God. You know. I know exactly what it is. Are they a public person? Sure. It's so sick. Oh, Bryce. You guys. Oh, my God.

It's okay. Oh, we love Bryce for that. Oh, my God. No. Bryce panicking. She's like, oh, no. No, i love it i yeah i mean we went to touch on that but then we were on the sun so we moved on from conversation but i will just say you like having my back so hard during that little of course silly rice itch was so sweet to me i was

like wow chris olson yeah i don't really in my head i don't i i understand that like you do have a different vibe on social media than everyone who's who maybe watches my videos but like i don't think i'm like exiting my brand to defend you you deserve to be defended in that way that's actually just so sweet um the recap the recap i mean you want to tell you want to tell her what's the recap well there was a guy on the internet who I had, Bryce, who had seen. I just can't be clip saying it again. I had seen them. I had just seen them.

You guys have been friends and he just made a video being like. Oh, I did see this. Fuck that guy. Sorry. We were never friends. He was always around too. It was not like he was just like a stranger and i feel like i feel like i've just i can not that i've been through that exact situation but

i was just like it it feels like someone who's trying to embarrass you and even though we had to get views we hadn't become like close at that point i was like as as i've referenced like 20 times in this podcast i've known you for years in the back of my head I'm like no one's doing my girl like that And also because I know I like you know My The people behind me Will stand behind you as well

We'll all come together And ride hard for our girl I feel like all of the public was on your team In that situation Because the way that he said it was so slimy. It was so slimy. It was like, I'm about to get so many views for this shit. She's always rubbing up on me in public.

No, she wasn't. Also, I feel like you've been honest about times in your past when you were like, I'm clout farming. I'm doing all of that stuff. Yeah. I feel like we're in a completely different era of you. And that's just not what that's not what the vibe is anymore and so for him to try to drag you back to that kind

of position was what was he doing that was actually what how I felt and I really appreciate you noticing that because I was like you know what this hype house me was clout farming everyone everyone was my bestie you know but I was honest about it. Yes. And that's what you did there. I've met him a few times. He's only ever been nice to me, so I don't have a personal vendetta against him. But if I see him in public, I'm not going to be like... You choose Tana.

Yeah, of course. You people. Always. You amazing people. Tell me more Meghan Trainor things. So is this Christmas song a part of an album? Is there going to be more? Jimmy was trying to do an album,

but I don't know if they got all the songs done. But he just wanted to do something with me, and we wrote it over Zoom together. It was really cute. What's the chorus go like? Give me a little. You don't have to sing it to me if you don't want to. It's called Wrap It Up, and I was like,

I'm thinking of other things And I don't like that Let's do Wrap Me Up Cause I'm your present So all the verses are him being like Is it a tie? Is it a sweater? And I'm like nope keep guessing And then I'm like you're looking at it Wrap me up

You guys weren't in the studio together though? No he lives in New York So I was on Zoom like She hates New York I don't in New York. So I was on Zoom like shitting my hand. Do you? I don't hate New York. NYC for life. But I don't love going there.

I prefer here. Really? I like from Nantucket. Tall buildings scare me. I don't know. That makes sense. Does it? Every time I walk the streets, I'm like, stink, you know?

You don't give it a chance to you'll be there and there will be you always leave early every single time there's like the last trip not the last trip you were there but the last trip we were there together you were we were like finishing up a thing you were supposed to leave in the morning we're like i'm leaving now and i'll get home at 2 a.m but i'm leaving now i don't give a fuck i need to get the fuck home it's also the children being here yeah so far away i hate it yeah very different that's really fair very different yeah and then touring starts when oh it's not locked in yet oh man same for us honestly but like after summer because i don't want to be a hot sweaty gal when's the last time you toured seven years ago no really oh my god so this is

gonna be like i'm really scared yeah and then what's what's the vibe on stage like you dance duh and you try it's gotta be so hard you're like it's so hard dude i need to learn how to lip sync immediately i cannot sing all these words and dance but thank god the vocals are like coming through you know what i mean we love to see it but you love to see are you naturally are you naturally a dancer or did that kind of come with like oh my mommy never put me in lessons i learned like while doing all this stuff so that's also what i'm terrified of like seven years ago when i toured there wasn't really tiktok like I think it was musically and so now I'm like oh my god I'm gonna be Justin Timberlake

doing a weird dance move and it's gonna go viral that is terrifying you know your moves you know your moves what's going on have you guys seen what's going on with Enrique Inglis right now no wait I think so yeah it was off And it was like It was like Paolo Or in the Lizzie McGuire movie Don't

Don't This one This one He's singing And it's just off It was off for sure Off key Or he's lip syncing

And it's off But then like As a person Who's been on the stage Like that Your in ears are crazy And if they're off Then you don't know

What's going on What sounded Like have you seen Taylor Swift video when her in-ear broke and she like watched her guitar player that was crazy though

her like signifying the one tap I could never I would have thrown my hands up it's a nightmare I'm done y'all thank you

I know I was like give up and ask for help but she like performer for life she was like I will figure it out you know touring does seem hard

so but i do believe after seven years you'll know you'll get up there riding a bike also rehearsal you have rehearsal do i i have like a week of rehearsal it's great i think you're gonna kill it and i actually can't wait to come to a show and i'm you know who's the nicest sweetest boy in the whole wide world no beck when we met him that night he was like well you gotta do a show and we all gotta go right he is i always compare him to like a golden retriever puppy he is a golden retriever so do you why were you at tate mccray that night like my managers um signed her recently so i was like i'm a fan for a long time too but so. So I got good seats because it was my management. I was like, yo, give me a nerve.

Absolutely. She's so amazing. Did you see her on SNL? She crushed it. Oh my God. In her new video, we keep talking about it, but it's like,

so good. I sent her a video of Riley going, don't forget how special you are. Stop. Yeah, I'll play your favorite song. I'm not kidding. If Riley's making any more cameos

for the next month, I would like one, please and thank you. No, I just said that my birthday's a week from today. Okay the next month, I would like one, please and thank you. No, I just said that my birthday's a week from today. Okay, Brooke. A week from today?

Absolutely. Perfect. Absolutely. I love Daryl Simon. What was I going to say? I'm just kidding. It's been so weird for me ever since meeting you now, going places and hearing you on the radio

and being like, I know that person. She's everywhere. Don't you realize now that she is everywhere? Sometimes I forget something is your song too and I'm like, you cannot go anywhere without hearing her. that she's everywhere don't you realize now that she is everywhere everywhere sometimes i'll forget something is your song too and i'm like and you cannot go anywhere without no wagon trainer nowhere does that just happen to you all the time where you're somewhere and you're like that's me uh i get played a lot in cbs and tarjay and those are my spots the best places to get played but i was all over vegas these past few days and you were playing you were playing yes in the aria

wow that's gotta be so funny you like clock out of like work and like you love her obviously you guys are best friends but you're like in vegas trying to get drunk i am your mother always always no no but even when we started like working together she was still my top artist on spotify last year because i genuinely stream all the time sorry for anyone who's ever dated you yeah imagine like their heart broken over you and i was like you don't have any mean songs that's like the first thing i would do if i had any talent mean songs that are well like lips are moving grow up is essentially about your brothers no one knows grow up it's like an extra song in the album i write songs a lot about my brothers like like i'm gonna lose you do you know that one

but john legend they're like oh yes yes yeah that one i wrote about my i had a nightmare that my little brother died and i like woke up and checked on him and i was like imagine like losing a family member i just can't oh you talking about death is me I have an insane fear that I'm about to see an extra, an extra, like a side therapist to help me specialize in my fear of death. It's so real. I've gotten better at it like over time. Mushrooms?

Probably. I can't do it. I'm such a big. Have you ever done a mushroom? I have some in my bag right now. I've never done a mushroom. I need to see you did. I brought him here today.

You did? I'm too scared i'm afraid i'll i'll afraid i'll trip and i'll never come back no but you don't have to like trip and fall you can just like trip and fall just like yeah i know i've never done like enough for it to be like i don't know it's not true the last time i did mushrooms i had about sometimes i just lie on here for fun so i am a little scared i was in europe and we're like walking around paris and it's like so beautiful and i take these mushrooms and i i all of a sudden i'm just under the impression that every single person i've ever known ever and around me ever hates me and wants me to literally

die yeah see i can't do that that's terrifying yeah that was scary i was a tie in page two and i like they were being so nice to me and i'd be like stop like what's so funny like what's like i was being like such a bitch because i thought they were like coming at me one of my one of my friends cousins like studies mushrooms though and says there's no such thing as like a fully bad trip because you still like learned something in that moment or went through that situation and like became terrifying i don't want to go that doesn't tell like something you want to go through but but like, I don't know, maybe. Yeah, I guess,

no, I guess I definitely like did. You went through it without it. You went through it without it actually happening. So like, yeah, I guess that's true. You were able to mentally process. And I love how much you guys love ghosts.

And I really want to see a ghost so that I know that I, if I die, I can like stick around and haunt everyone. I want a ghost hunt so bad. I try, dude. I didn't see a ghost. You didn't?

No. Oh my God. That's like going whale watching and not seeing a thing That's exactly what it is Have you guys seen one of Debbie Lovato's Skyscraper to the ghost I watch ghost videos all the time And I'm like don't see one Should we go ghost hunting?

I'll literally do it I don't know if I can Those are the one things I'm most terrified of They can just scare you I mean no i went to mushrooms and go-go's who are ryan who do we go with overnight overnight we went with those boys who are we don't want to go with them if they can't find any ghosts i don't know but i went to the basement at three in the morning of this like haunted ass house no and i yelled come and get me big boy no that's terrifying demon come and get me and ryan's like no megan don't say it he was so scared

yeah it's it's uh it rumbled bro it was like it mumbled it was like crazy that's a little scratch me i would never do a ouija board because i feel like that Megan will die It's crazy That's a little I was like Trickle me Scratch me I would never do a Ouija board Because I feel like that Come on Have you done it? No let's do it

Oh my god I think this would be A really fun journey for us Bro I will do it Yeah it would be so hilarious Wait did you say drinking? Journey No drinking

I was like I can't drink with you guys I want to throw up No I can't I can't either I'm on your train Are you not drinking right now? Yeah for like a whole

Day 12 hours Yeah for most of the afternoon I've stopped can't either i'm on your you're not drinking right now uh yeah for like a whole day i'm a good like drinker in moderation it's my flex that's what i'm working on right now is my moderation see i've just never like even being sober the idea of moderation doesn't even sound fun for me right because all I think about is either being sober or getting absolutely hammered. And obviously getting absolutely hammered did not work for me. So I'm like, okay,

I guess we'll just do nothing. When I met you at Take Two, you said I'm sober. I think I was. She was. You were doing it, you were in 75 soft at that point. Yeah, and then I broke it

on day like 60 something. So close. Where was I? Why did I break it? Oh, I had a Halloween party And I was like I have to drink through being the host Hosting a party I said that after a party at Tate's

Being sober here is tough It is just so hard The socializing of it all Socializing with drunk people as well That is the one thing That I absolutely hate That's why I don't go out as much anymore. Yeah, I was going to ask, do you enjoy going out?

It depends on what it is. I do find myself home early most nights because I just don't want to be at the after thing or once everyone starts getting fucked up. It's fun to be around everyone while everything's beginning and everyone's just

excited and has that kind of energy. But then when people start getting messy, I'm just like it's not to be around everyone while everything's beginning and everyone's just like excited and has that kind of energy. But then when people start getting messy, I'm just like, I, yeah, it's like frustrated. That's the problem is I don't really want to drink that much, but it's like,

I can't sadly, like I cannot enjoy being around certain people if I'm, but then it's like, why am I around them? It's a scam y'all. Haven't you seen? Exactly. You're right.

I'm like, it is a scam. It's like, same with this fucking bitch. There's also so many, in my opinion, there's so many fun things to do during the day. Yeah. I'm a like wine with dinner type of drinker, not really like a like seven shots party drinker.

Yeah. And I think that, I mean, that's like a lovely moment to have. Do you have a Riley video? Show now. Put it up to the mic. Come here, come watch. You have to come see this. You know what I like about you

is you're ADHD coded like me. Like we'll have seven conversations at once. Sorry. And then here's the Riley video. That's how my brain works. Okay, good. Like, so I obsess.

Hi, Tana. Hi, Brooke. Love you. I love you. Miss you. Miss you. Don't get canceled. there's no way there's it's like my magic trade dude i just give people cameos i need you to text this to me i'm getting knocked up tonight immediately no one can stop me riley is perfect the little glasses i love when kids have to wear glasses or helmets people you know when the babies have to wear their heads

on helmet people think i put those on for looks i was like the boy can't see how would you find out he couldn't see he's so cute um but uh well what did i just miss a pediatrician like had this amazing binocular thing and He couldn't see. He's so cute. When you take them all, he's squeaky. But, uh. Whoa, what did I just miss? A pediatrician, like, had this amazing binocular thing. And, like, they take a picture and one eye was a little off. And they were like, he has astigmatism. And they were like, you should go check this out.

And then it's really sad. He was, like, one years old. And this amazing doctor, she has, like, the TV playing. And you have to hold him far away. And she goes, look, look, look, look goes look look look look look look and then she puts like huh lenses in his face oh to like see when

yeah and once he stops freaking out because he couldn't talk then she was like oh that's his that's what he needs that's crazy how they're able to do that yeah that was definitely not a thing like back in the day no at all my brother was so bad at pulling I would tell her I would lie i'd be like i can't see do you ever do like do you ever wear fake glasses all the time i can't i like i can't have it i can't wear

sunglasses even oh i can't why you've never seen me with sunglasses i know i'm just not realizing i don't wear them either i can't i just i don't want to see in the dark i don't want to see color nobody gets that i mean it's a beautiful day i want to see it ruins dark like i don't want to see color nobody gets that i mean it's a beautiful day i want to see it ruins it ruins my experience and i think it's my love for the dark like i'm like i'm asleep now no because i love it oh my god your energy is dark it's sad i'm like i can't see squinting so much i want to be able to just keep my eyes. I won't have those wrinkles. I won't do it. No, I know. I'm going to have like the Botox. I can't help it. I know. I'm so frozen right now.

I'm fully emoting. I'm so frozen. Are you? I'm just trying not to. Oh my God, wait. I just got some. When did you get Botox for the first time? 28, I think.

Wow, good for you. I should have done it pre. I should have had. No, you look good. At 25, your skin stops. Oh, yeah. I haven't. I haven't. Facialist girl just told me that. She's like, well, if you're At 25 your skin stops Oh yeah I haven't I haven't Facialist girl just told me that

She's like Well you're 25 Your skin's not I feel like you're not You're not even I was If you saw What my forehead was doing before

Like right now Give me a full eyebrow raise No Oh Do it Mine are Aging is beautiful Oh there's nothing going on there

Wow you can't even see anything Yeah She's like I'm gonna pop a blood vessel i had a wrinkle at 16 not kidding like a full-blown wrinkle and i got botox a party animal no i think i was just way too stressed by that age like i my first botox round was for my wrinkle yeah also like regardless of who you are every time i go to vegas i think about what it how insane it must be for people who live there like i can't not real granted like obviously most people who are going to vegas are

going to like the crazy strip and all of that stuff but like growing up there it's no a few good people that like grew up there i don't know how again this whore next um i remember being like 14 And like actually thinking To my parents Like why did you pick here Right Why did they pick there

Do you know The cost of living I guess I don't really know Did they have like jobs That brought them there No Kind of No I don't

Like I feel like it's very Just like regular Like suburban neighborhood Outside of the strip But I think I've never really Ventured out But like when you're 16 And drinking on the strip but i think i've never really ventured out

but like when you're 16 and drinking on the strip that's terrifying like you didn't get caught right outside of dc i got in a lot of trouble i have a friend from potomac yeah no potomac is right where like right around where we grew up love it love group in a place called chevy chase maryland chevy chevy chase maryland yes yes right outside of dc but that's Group in a place called Chevy Chase, Maryland. Chevy Chase. I thought the Chevy Chase, Maryland. Yes, yes, right outside of DC. But that's awesome. Like, I wish, I feel like I want to raise my kids somewhere more wholesome than Vegas. It's very suburban. She got pregnant in Hawaii.

What if you did? She's pregnant. How would you know? We'll know. I can smell it. I would know. I can smell it. It's crazy.

Like it's a cavity. This chicken parm over here I think is what you're getting a whiff of. Your first you had at what? You said 28? 26. I was knocked up. Fuck. That's so crazy.

I've got three days. I've got three days. She is on a different track than most people i found love at 22 which is so successful already too by that time i think i have a little more to do i was like did it love it now what yeah there are so many people i feel like in like the the circle of people we are frequently in who are extremely successful and are like having kids. Like, I mean, she's not in our circle, but I've obviously followed Kylie Jenner my whole life. And she had a baby when she was 20.

And I'm just like, that's great. And so we have these like warped perceptions. It fucks me up all the time. I'll be like, but Kylie has a baby. And everyone's like, you're not Kylie.

Go back to work. Yeah. Yeah. It's just like very different. Like my mom had me when she was 35. Yeah, I guess that's it. Well, my mom had us when she was 24, but it's only because my dad was 44.

I was the third kid and she was 22 when she had me. I was her third kid. What the F? I know. My 22? It didn't work out really well. I was going to say, how's that? That's chaos.

That's crazy. Okay. Wow. Yeah. All right. right well are you like me like i was walking the aisles of um like target with my boyfriend at the time who's my husband now and i was like crying when i passed the diapers because i was like oh you were like craving yeah i feel like i've always thought i was gonna be an older mom though like i thought like i just you look so young you're gonna look like this at 35. So true. So true.

You could pull that off. I have to like get going. That's just not true. I also wish in so many ways that Daryl could be the one that was getting pregnant while I'm like dancing on stage. Would you do a surrogate?

I am tired. You should do the simulator, the birth simulator. On him? Yeah. Yeah, I've told him I was gonna do that and he's like please don't do that to me we should try that we should do like a video or something actually i don't think i want to try that i actually i'm kind of down to try because i really need to know what i'm working section like me i want to surrogate though bad you want to

surrogate no that's the whole fun of having my kid like a coffee it's not fun at all i have i wrote a book about it it's called The Future Mama really link is right there yes it is yes it is yeah I just wrote about my experience

but everyone's experience is so different but I was like nobody warned me about this nobody warned me about this you had to be the type of person where like then when the people

were like it was a beautiful easy experience you were like fuck yeah it's like some people love it

and then they become surrogates and some people are like i don't know if i could do that ever again my baby's both laid to me sideways so i always had to do a c-section and i was like i want four and i don't know if i can get cut open two more times you know oh my god do they go in the same little spot uh-huh and i'm gonna have you drop off my baby like a coffee. Yeah. I don't know. Could you imagine?

That should be your new series. Tag me. That's it. Bringing babies to people. Yeah. I love that. It's so good. You should do it.

I think I'm going to have to. I'm not kidding. But I should stop. We need every week. And it's like, no one's not. Let's start with you got a boyfriend a baby is such a commitment to you i just can't think of committing to something yeah no i can't right now i think i just like to live in la la land of course you know for at least like

two more years i'm it's definitely i'm just joking unless something happens that i'm really excited about but who knows i think you're gonna have a little hawaiian baby surprise hawaiian baby and i'm so it's gonna be on a surfboard he was just showing me his baby pictures yesterday and he was on a surfboard when he was like three i was like it's gonna be on a surfboard and it's gonna come out on a surfboard i fucking hope you're pregnant so hard right now i know i just like actually the more we talk about it though getting chest pains yeah like don't need that feeling it yeah at all do you want kids one day i don't think i want kids mostly from what i was saying before about just like the commitment i can't think of raising also

i know how much what hell it was to raise me yeah and i'm like imagine if i had if my child was anything like me or worse they'll be like the other. But you're also Gunkle of the century. The other guy? Yeah, when you marry someone, you guys gotta pick a sperm.

Sure, sure. Pick his for the first one. I don't know, so many of my friends are having children. He comes over the first time

he saw me with Barry, my second baby. We're outside by our playground and he was like, ah, look at all this. And I just felt, I was like, here's my our playground and he was like, ah, look at all this. And I just felt,

I was like, here's my child. And he was like, ah. I just, I don't have the parental instinct in me either. You know?

But she's just holding like, I'm like, oh my God. That's like a really small person. Then I put Barry in his arms and then I see it and I like film that moment because I see him go,

I've had moments with riley riley and i have had some bonding moments and when he says my name i'm like that i we're we're close but a lot of that but but then i go home and i it's not like i'm like and now i need one for myself i'm like that was a nice moment in its isolation gungle of the century yeah that's what i hate it. I want my brother to have babies immediately. If anyone is looking, my brother. You're such a handsome boy.

Come here. Come audition yourself. I'm going to fix myself first. No, Tana, stop it. It's a brother. Some brothers don't know what to do with my hands. My brother's straight No no I was pointing at Brooke

That's Megan's subconscious always Trying to set me up with him Yeah Megan's dream forever Is at the end of the day I said Dana no don't She's gonna die Isn't there like a whole thing on the internet though? You guys had like a little pretend.

Yeah. Yeah. That's a B. Yeah. Listen, I make people kiss people. Kiss. No,

on the lips. Sort of. I just kissed Meghan Trainor on campus. Yes. I love a kiss. Oh, I feel so good and sweaty. Um,

I love a kiss. So I, I'm going to have SI have sebo issues um we were um all in australia celebrating and we walked the bridge the amazing bridge in sydney and they had us you had to go in pairs so ryan was paired with chris and listen i don't love each other we really do but me and daryl me and daryl kissed in our moment so then we went first and then i yelled at them and i said kiss and then they kissed yeah yeah i but i wasn't initially gonna do it but ryan like digged me ready for a moment we love a secure

in your masculinity straight man and we love just we love a kiss and so when I was creating my Australia dump on Instagram I was like I want a moment to be the first photo and that was

the best moment of the trip for me I said Ryan are you sure you're straight and he was like honestly in that kiss I felt like

he was my friend you know and I was like and he was like I'm excited well that's really how you find out you don't really know

until you dabble a little I've been with two girls have you? yeah plus whole nine twice And he was like I'm excited Well that's really how you find out You don't really know Until you dabble a little You don't know until you try I've hooked up with two girls Have you? Yeah Plus whole nine Twice Oh my god really?

Oh my god two separate girls Oh wait Love Not in one evening That's exhausting I have hooked up with a girl I've never like fully had sex with a girl Okay

Got it But I feel like I think you're gonna though one day I think you're gonna Yeah I feel like you have to Like you have to You Like, you have to. You gotta just check. Yeah.

Yeah, just in case. Fully. You're gonna say love, of course. But Ryan and Brooke. That's what I was trying to do. Don't come here. You guys are gonna embarrass me. Wow. Oh, wow.

Stop. He won't come over here if he's his. I actually completely understand why you don't want to come over here. Like, however. It's like the reason the boyfriend isn't upstairs yet, I guess. You know, he's not my boyfriend. He is your boyfriend. He flew from Hawaii to see you.

You're so right. Okay. Yes, he's my boyfriend. No, he's not. No, but it's too soon to technically like really heavily use the B word. But I'm really excited. What's his name again? Makoa is his

name oh believe that maybe you really seriously just walked right into that i just thought she was asking a nice friendly question and i just make it it's never that I'm gonna I'm gonna answer her you know oh my god I said god what's his name again oh my god

no no no Makoa is his name no you gotta see him he looks like he just looks like big Hawaiian he looks

yeah he's stunning I just saw all of his muscles okay you've had some I'm usually a dad bug girl so this is a new journey it looks good for you though

it's fun you know yeah you looked very happy in that last post very interesting taste of men there because there's no um i just like personality it is a very wide range but sometimes you miss your heels yeah sometimes i do miss there but i'm i'm going this one she said she goes for personality but i go sometimes i'm like how to explain that one i like and i like what I like when I like it. And I don't know what to say.

Write that down. I'm like, what did I say? Someone write that down. That was cool. That was like a t-shirt. That was amazing. Mitch. Yeah.

I like it. I like it. I like it. Do you have any relationships where you are like, that was the one that got away? Makawa? What? No. What? I thought I heard a man. Babe!

Oh my God, no, and that kind of sounds like me. She's like really hitting the rasp. Babe! Babe! Thank you for coming on this episode. No, I'm kidding, I'm just kidding. I don't know. I guess you never really know that.

Well, sometimes you do. You're gonna get married in Hawaii. There we go. Thank God. Oh, I can't know. I guess you never really know that. Well, sometimes you do. You're going to get married in Hawaii. There we go. Thank God. Oh, I can't make it. So far away. It could be down the street you're not making it, but you want the invite.

Yes, I want the invite. If it's down the street, I'll make it. I went to Bears. I just left early. I was tired. That is fair. That is actually really fair. So what are you guys doing for the rest of your beautiful Sunday?

I got to go home And do bath time With the boys Yeah she's like going to bath It's literally It's close to her bedtime What does bath time entail We like Do you get in

Toddlers need No no I mean I could But no Toddlers need a structure So at 630 Right before 620 We play

Twinkle twinkle little Little Star on YouTube. And we all sing. Then we go upstairs. And then we start the bath. And he loves these. They have little tiny bath bombs that change color. So he's like, let's do the blue one. And then we throw in blue.

And last night, we did yellow and blue and made green. And he loves it. And we practice learning how to swim. And he's like, I go, do your kick, kick, kicks. And he does it. we practice learning how to swim and he's like i go do your kick kick kicks and he does it and he's so and you don't want all that i don't because i could that was just your purgatory i mean i could go over and experience that if i wanted to but i like i love i love i get it i'm just kidding yeah being alone Yeah I'm just animal Guys It's crazy What's your death row meal? Oh shit Zah

Pizza You don't already know Well it has to be more than just pizza Oh yeah you can have multiple Okay With ranch Yeah you should go on that one They'll have you for sure

The What's it called like last supper or something And like you They actually get all your death row meals for you But I need to like guarantee not have the tummy ache. Therefore I will have. Oh, IBS pills will be starting that.

No, IBS aside. Well, what are yours first? What's Ikea meatball sundae? Oh, what? Ikea meatball sundae with like the cranberry sauce and mashed potatoes.

Yep. Ryan gets you. Yeah. That's weird. A plate of hot Cheetos and then a separate paper plate of warm queso. But like until I'm full. Yep. Ryan gets you. Yeah. That's weird. A plate of hot Cheetos and then a separate paper plate of warm queso. But like until I'm full. Period.

You're so trash. I love it. A plate of hot Cheetos and warm queso. Why even put them on a plate? Dip the Cheetos in. Okay.

She's dripping. Okay. In sweat and also from that. She says she has IBS I'm like no It's just the foods You're eating Yeah that's tough

Yeah I guess mine's Mine would be basic Like it would just be Like canes Or something like that Whoa that's good That's how you coded

Yeah Like canes Classy Just a chicken nugget Yeah Love that A chicken nugget Just a

A simple chicken nugget With some sauce What would mine be? Pizza Pizza I live for my brother What's your favorite pizza? Plain old cheese I just took a simple chicken nugget with some sauce. What would mine be? Pizza. Pizza. I look for my brother. What's your favorite pizza? Plain old cheese.

No, like, wait, from where? And then I dump Parmesan on top because I'm naughty. Wow, that's real. And then I dip it in the ranch. That sounds so good right now. I don't know what's wrong with me today. I'm just, like, a bottomless pit. Pregnant.

She's manifesting it for you now And she is quite the manifester I didn't pregnant you myself When she's the godmother I'm so pissed about it In like nine months Then like then we'll talk about it She started this

Honored Next question That leads me to my next question Would you rather have a gay son Or a thought daughter What's a thought daughter Both Me I have a thought daughter

Gay son Thought daughter Yeah you Both Or wait both I love a thought Yeah we love a thought You think you're a thought Sometimes I act wait, both. I love a thought. Yeah, we love a thought.

You think you're a thought? Sometimes I act like one. I think you're a dream and a vision. And you're an idea. I don't know. I love you so much it hurts. Gay son or thought daughter? Both.

All of the above. My mom goes, I think I missed out on my chance of having a gay son. And I was like, you sure did. You got these two straight boys over here. She would have been the best gay mom ever yeah that's why i'm there as often as i can those are my kids yeah a hundred percent i mean i guess but honestly i think as a gay dad my my gay son wouldn't think i was like that he would he would probably we would butt heads you know what i mean i feel like i could i would with a thought daughter we would butt heads. You know what I mean? I feel like I could, I would, with a thought daughter, we would have the best time. It's kind of like us.

Yeah, I would treat her so well. I would defend her to the masses. You know what I mean? A man goes up against her. No, absolutely not. I would also love my gay son, but a thought daughter probably. Monica? No. Where's the boyfriend? Where's Makoa? Makoa! Absolutely not Yeah I would also love my gay son But a thought daughter probably What's his name Monica No Where's the boyfriend

Where's Makoa Makoa Makoa I'm not subject to all this Well on the way out I will introduce you guys Okay Tell him I need him so bad

No on the way out I'll introduce you guys I don't want to subject him Tell him she needs him so bad No don't do it No no no He's not a fun toy We need to show him

Since when are men not toys that's so true no it's megan screaming no we'll see him on the way we said it on the last episode you did oh my god guys it's so oh my god she loves him i'm so stressed she loves him i've never seen her get so like no you're in love oh my god megan you know like five minutes ago i almost was gonna be like so can i have a fucking date back no and then i was like i was like ah look how good you're doing without it good good i'm so proud of you you took a break a 20 minute break that actually is awesome have you ever quit vaping I'm not kidding

that actually is awesome that's huge for me um no I've never quit this is my butt you won't get it like I didn't do it for so long and I was weirdly

the judgmental like oh my god I can't believe you'd do that I'll send you a video a day of Riley if you don't do it maybe four videos a day

that's a win that is kind of a win I'll force my child she's like you have to be alive for your children one day Tana yeah thank you right yeah and the voice does just keep getting lower I'm gonna send you a video of him saying That is kind of a win. I'll force my child. She's like, you have to be alive for your children one day, Tana. Yeah. Thank you.

Right. Yeah, and the voice does just keep getting lower. I'm going to send you a video of him saying, stop smoking your vape. No, stop, stop, stop. Right now. Stop. There's my phone. Got it for her butt.

I love how much fun you have. I just actually ripped my vape out of Meghan Trainor's ass hole. And now I'm hitting her. Oh, my God. I just now noticed how Christmas, like, her christmas rings her christmas um yeah for my jimmy fowl song wrap me up okay oh my god actually wrap me up and guys honest to god thank you for coming on i think we actually just we kind of we're in an hour this was oh yeah and we're gonna cut it down you know cut out all the things that will get miss megan trainer uh

canceled and we don't want any of that. Not that she said anything. It was the things I was saying next to her. Right. It's okay. I just can't believe I get to call either one of you a friend. And I'm so happy to have you on the podcast. This is insane.

I smell your stank joint. If you give me eye. Don't get her contact eye. I'm actually so for real. I have children. Oh, my God. Thank you for having us. Everyone's giving me a panic Thank you so much

I am in sheer panic This is my dreams Please come back A hundred times Seriously this is like I've always wanted to be On these leathery couches And thank you so much

And we're ghost hunting soon The four of us I'm not kidding I'm dead ass Can it be in LA though Because the last time we went to It was like in San Francisco And what a trip

No I feel like there's Probably more ghosts here anyway Vegas Yeah there are The ghost hunting there Is actually wild I feel like there's probably more ghosts here anyway the ghost hunting there is actually wild I feel like someone smoked a joint in my face me too I hate it too and I've just like adapted to it why are you sorry he's fine

he's just 22 he doesn't know he knows he just oh my god it's so nice that's really nice I can't believe I had to watch you just eat my sandwich like that He knows. He just... Oh, my God. It's so nice. That's nice. That's really nice. Oh, God. That's good. I can't believe I had to watch you just eat my sandwich like that.

Oh, is that one? Oh, shit. Stupid whore. Stupid whore. Bye. Love you. Thank you, guys. Thank you, brother. Bye.

Yeah. you