Cancelled with Tana Mongeau & Brooke Schofield - Episode 16: Tana's Stalker is Stalking Brooke

Episode Date: December 1, 2021

In this episode Tana and Brooke discuss Brooke's encounter with Tana's Stalker, the Reality House controversy, and more Lilah sugar baby stories. This episode is sponsored by Pill Club (http://www.thepillclub.com/cancelled), Cerebral (http://www.cerebral.com/tana) and Country Heat Weekly Podcast (https://music.amazon.com/podcasts/8b0cf1f8-ea72-4ee7-ad89-39ec6474ee87/country-heat-weekly). Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Booster Juice is the dragon's lair, where dragon fruit lives for a limited time. The Pink Dragon Booster Mixer, Dragon Slay a Smoothie, and Dragon Booster Ball of Weight. Order now on the Booster Rewards app. Canceled. Don't remember doing this at all. I can only hold myself accountable. Canceled. I am jacked!

Look how good my life is. So what else? Canceled. Tanamoja is cancelled. I'm so drunk. Look how good my life is. So what else? Cancel. Time to murder is canceled. I'm so drunk. I know. And you really didn't come in like I thought you were. I thought she was going to go, hello and welcome back to the canceled podcast.

No. And I am hammered and Brooke is sober. No, literally, I am very drunk and Brooke is very sober. I'm not sober now. Now. Here's the thing. She just made me chug two white. What are these? Truly, I don't know.

But I just need you to chug like nine more. Like I'm not. I have, I have a burping phobia and they're very carbonated and cold. Wait, you even, so Brooke, honestly, I don't know if you guys know this, but Brooke has the, I'm not kidding. Someone burps and you like try to kill yourself. Is that bad to say? Yeah.

Yes, it is. Like you, it's, I think not. Like you like like you're leaving if someone burps it's like a thing it's because i this is how i feel okay and i don't feel i i don't feel this way about everything like it like i don't care about like someone farting or like something like that but i swear burping for some reason i have this like image in my head i picture it i picture like the burp the cloud like the gas cloud i picture that happening and then i picture it settling into everything in the room so if i have an open

glass of water can't drink it anymore my white claw done for because your burp is in it i actually like when i'm around you i will hold the burp in for so long to the point that i have like indigestion because i don't want you to i don't want you to feel that way but burping is a choice and I really truly believe that it's a bodily function no no it's not because it's like I burping you can always control that keep it in your mouth hold it in your mouth keep your mouth closed well it's like the chewing phobia I understand there's certain things that you just like do not like and like there's you don't always have to have a reason for it it's just like like you have phobia of it you don't like it i get it well because it feels it feels like intentional disrespect it's like close your mouth but i never knew until right now that your burping phobia was so far that you wouldn't burp

no well i don't i mean it's it's like i how am i going to be insensitive in that way like what if what if the what what if the viewers have a burping phobia? But you know, I don't care. And we can't like what trigger warning. Trigger warning burps. Stop. That's what I want. TikTok is the gun.

I'm in, I'm in on, on Facebook. I'm in a misophonia support group. I am. But it's because. I'm not laughing at misophonia. I'm laughing at a Facebook support group. It's huge. It's a huge community.

I'm so sorry. It's a huge community. I'm so sorry. It's a huge community. Misophonia is the sound of things or the little circles? It's like. No, it's trip. It can be a lot of different things. And people like, obviously, there's like, there's levels to this shit. Okay.

I don't have like, a lot of people have it way worse. I had a really good friend in high school who hers was so bad. It was like debilitating. Like she would have to be like removed from class if someone was like chewing gum kind of thing but at that but what's crazy is at that time i was like you're ridiculous like get over it like whatever and until you like really start to feel that way no i have you don't understand and then and then as soon as i like really like i i was like i developed it i swear i haven't always been that way and it was like over time all of a sudden it would like,

I understand. And I actually genuinely refrain from burping around you at all times. So I do have a level of understanding. All I need to know is that somebody is cognizant of it and like, and tries because I have friends who will belch in my face and like literally hands behind their back. There's no effort. Why is that Ari?

Ari loves to burp so much. But everyone knows now and everyone's eyes will widen like literally hands behind their back there's no effort why is that ari ari it is but ever everyone knows now and everyone's eyes will widen the second they do it and they're like oh no no no i'll hit an in-mouth it'll ruin my day this is me with you i'm like like i hit like an in-mouth it's more about yeah it's it's like as long as you're trying no and honest to god i have i think i don't know if arachnophobia is only the fear of spiders or the fear of bugs, but I have a crippling fear of bugs. Yeah, I don't know what the bug fear is, but arachnophobia I think is. I have severe fear of bugs. And it's like a fly will be in the room and I'm like screaming at the top of everyone's lungs.

I remember, I made like a funny video in Hawaii. I picked up like a little like caterpillar looking. It was like foam. It was like, it was the end like it was like it was it was the end of a pillow it was like a tassel from a pillow and i freaked out i picked it up and she almost beat my ass no and i freaked the fuck out and it's like but i under but i do understand it because there's certain things that like that actually upset me that much maybe not burping but like well there can just be a fly in the room and i'm like acting like ted bundy's in the room

like i like freak out like someone's gonna fucking kill me like i can't deal because i think i won't gaslight you everyone will always be like it's just a fly it's just a fly and i'm like okay but flies regurgitate every time they land so knowing that when they land on you they're vomiting on you there are that's cute like you know i see i don't know not cute no it's not cute i I thought about something cute. I'm sorry. No, I thought about something cute. I was with... I was with Joe. I was with Joe at breakfast.

It was Joe. Do you remember we named him? Did we name him Joe? Yeah, we named him Joe. It's really funny because the show You. I know. He serves me. That was a whole context.

Is that why we did that? I don't remember that. I hate that. Also, the trauma gave me crippling memory loss I'm really hitting All the victim cards today I have arachnophobia I have memory loss

From trauma Sorry Anywho I was at breakfast With Joe The other morning And a fly landed On my raspberry

And he picked the raspberry off And just put it And I thought about it And I was like Who cares? Do you know that Just made me gag? You know what I'm joking?

See I have no In the depth of my throat I just gagged that's why like a lot of food off the floor oh like i don't it's not dirt like i just have a cripple you're not afraid of dirt yeah no shit bitch like i literally just have a crippling fear of bugs that is really strange i don't know i don't have anything like that like i was i was playing hide and seek yesterday. I texted Brooke, and we were texting about something really important, and she texted me back hours later and goes, sorry, I was playing hide and seek.

I was. Like, excuse me, what? It was the best. I had the best day ever yesterday. I was hanging out with like six of us or seven of us, and we were all at Kaysan's house. So Kaysan has like the crazy. Kaysan's so daddy.

Let's talk about that. He's so hot. No one ever told us that. Let's talk about Kaysan for eight seconds before we get into the story. So Kaysan's always been like an L.A. Like I believe his family comes from money, no? I have no idea. He has the most beautiful home here in L.A.

He's always been like a very rich friend of like everyone in LA and FaZe Clan just signed him yeah now he's FaZe Kaysan yeah and he he just did a music video

with FaZe Clan where like Charli D'Amelio was in it Addison Rae was in it it was like the most clouded video of all time of all time

he said check this one out he brought in all his little friends like Justin Bieber and shit no yeah not really no literally I think or it was like the Migos or like Future it was just like the craziest video and it's like how did you line up check this one out. He brought in all his little friends, like Justin Bieber and shit. No, not really. No, literally, I think,

or it was like the Migos, or like Future. It was just like the craziest video, and it's like, how did you line up all those people's schedules? And he was always our like, rich, low-key, well-kept secret friend,

and now he's just killing it. Yeah, he's out there. I love K-Son. Yeah, but like, I wasn't really like, we've never been close.

I don't really like know him that well, but yesterday, we all went, it was like six or seven of us. We all went to K-Son's house, and like, the entire day was yesterday we all went it was like six or seven of us we all went to case on's house and like the entire day was just so perfect it was like everybody no the whole time it was phones in the middle phones in the middle a pile of phones and you live on put seven phones in the middle he's like of course and nobody touched their phone the entire time we like we sat we went to el pisteo we had like a nice dinner or whatever and we went home and everyone played hide and seek for literally like five hours

and it was just so like in the dark and it was like i don't know i thought it was like the coolest thing because it's like a bunch of kids who are like killing it and like playing yeah i mean it was just like i mean i don't have very many friends who can go more than 30 seconds without looking at their phone so i felt like that was an in-life subtweet. I'm not going to lie. It is. I'm bad at that. Baby, I looked her up and down.

I was talking about her. No, I'm bad at that. But I also think it's my ADHD. I just like, I see a text and I get mad distracted. Not to, I'm not trying to Gabbie Hanna.

I get it. Like, don't blame your ADHD on everything. I'm not always, I'm not going to take an Adderall to go to dinner though. I'm prescribed Adderall. That's not a drug

use joke. It's like I have crippling ADHD. So I take Adderall to like focus when I work and like live life. But I hate, like Adderall also makes you a drone. Like, you know what I mean? It makes you so like, hello guys. I am on Adderall. I am focused now. No, and our last

podcast, everyone kept saying, it was like our best podcast ever because we were being so funny and chill and it's one of the few ones that i've done without being on aeg medication because it's like normally i take it i wake up i work all day see i always ask you i i said that initially because i was like how do you do that and like still have a personality because i don't though as soon as i got maybe i was like my dosage was off or something but I I my personality just completely like disappears with no like I can't make a joke I don't think anything's funny and then I'm probably gonna cry and probably send you and you hate everyone and you want to die I'm so mean it's it's so tragic because it's like my options

in life are like have crippling ADHD like you're unmotivated to do anything you can't focus on anything you're so depressive you've 10 seconds before you're unmotivated to do anything you can't focus on anything you're so depressive you've 10 seconds before you're like squirrel like literally like i have the most crippling adhd you could ever ask for in this life or you take the adderall to fix your adhd and you're mad focused but you're like hello my name is tana and this is the cancel that was like me in college i like i feel like my personal i had like two years of no personality but now i have like a very convenient lifestyle for having ADHD. Because it's, like, no one's going to suffer if I sit on the couch all day.

I just feel like mine is so crippling that even though my lifestyle is, like, quote, unquote, convenient for it, like, I can do whatever I want. No, but you have to wake up every day and, like, get things done and, like, actually work. And ADHD cripples, like, your body. It's, like, I can't even stand. I can't even go get my phone from, like, the other side of the room. Like, you can't do anything. I can't even go get my phone from like the other side of the room. Like you can't do anything. You're just like stuck. I can't get ready unless.

Dude, I just learned about this thing with ADHD called mirroring. That it's like if you have ADHD, you can do anything you want if someone else is doing it. It's called mirroring. It's like as in like if I'm editing and Hunter's editing next to me, I can edit fire. Because I keep being mentally reminded that I'm supposed to edit. That can't be true because I watch my roommate clean all day and I don't do shit. No, but for me, it's like I can't get ready unless someone's getting ready next to me. Unless obviously I take my medication.

That I believe. No, it's just like it's the weirdest thing. Like it's like I can work all day if Kyla's there working with me. But if I'm alone, like I'm just like the ceiling is so dope. Yeah. Like and it's so fucking annoying. It makes me want death. I hate having ADHD.

I don't know. I'll shut up. I don't know. Sometimes I feel like it makes us spunky. I know for sure. Because it's like sometimes you're so motivated and like so funny. Yeah. But then other times it's like I this couch is so sick and I hate it.

But speaking, we were just talking about me being dirty. You're not, I don't think you're dirty. I'm not dirty. I'm not dirty now, especially because I'm single. When you're, when I'm taken, I'm like so stuck in it and I'm like, oh my God, like I'm, like I'll just be gross. Who cares? Yeah, like Dorito dust in my hair.

No, exactly. Unless I'm with someone who's like mad motivated, then I'll mirror them, literally that. You are a mirror. No, 100%. I'm a mirror. Like if I'm like dating a guy who like showers every second, I'll be like, let's shower. But if I'm dating someone who's like depressive slightly,

I'm like, I love the ceiling. That's crazy because you gaslight the fuck out of me about showering too much. No, you shouldn't. But you're an over showerer. I can't even begin to explain brooke thinks like four showers a day is no one takes four not that i think not that i think four showers a week is normal i'm saying like even that like two i don't know i don't know

um but point being i need to tell you what happened to me today okay so you know that i've been having a lot of conversations with you about either A, my stalker is fucking with me or B, my house is haunted. Do you know that your stalker came for me? William. I don't know if he did or not, but keep going. What happened? No, tell me. No, you have to talk first.

Yeah. Okay. So basically, I just went to Vegas. And before I left for Vegas, I was at my house and I showered. Long story, actually. Can I tell you a long story? It's like it's two stories in one. How long?

I'm like. You're like fucking bitch. I'm like ADHD. First comes to first. First comes first is right before I left, we shot the commercial for my upcoming wine. So I'm shooting Dizzy Wines coming out soon. I will promote it. Grocery stores, online.

I got really drunk. Really easily. It's actually my favorite thing in the world. My favorite project I've worked on in years. We were shooting the commercial and the billboards for Dizzy Wine. And I had everyone come. And right before it, the night before, I was supposed to self-tan and I didn't. And I woke up and I was so pale.

And like just iron deficiency, as you know. Why do I have so many problems with the adhd the iron deficiency everything um i had so many bruises all over me i looked horrible and my makeup artist was like do not let me glam you until you tan like it was that bad like i literally was the wall damn alexis no no but she's just honest i'm just kidding it's it's a it's a billboard and a commercial and it's one thing you can face in the billboard, but like you can't fucking edit the commercial. Like I needed to look like a decent level of good. Right.

And so Kyla, my assistant, was like, let's get you a spray tan. And so we order a spray tan for my girl who does mine. And she's like, I'm busy. So she sends her like cousin or something who also does spray tan. Not the cousin. And I see her and i'm like can i please have a light to medium and she's like of course i don't believe i don't believe you would ever those words would ever come out of your mouth no i i genuinely promise you because it was like

it was in like three hours so it was like i'm not trying to look like crazy yeah i'm not obviously you want it to be dark and then rinse it off but like if you're doing it in three hours i'd like an instant and i'd like it to be light to medium. And so I ordered this spray tan. She's like light to medium. She sprays me. I look fine. It looks great. I sit down in the makeup chair in the three hours of development.

I'm talking world. I've logged it. It's coming out on YouTube. That's what happened to Selena Gomez at the Met. World. Did it? Yeah. Bryce just got canceled for lying and saying he fucked her on his youtube channel

oh man idiot but point being um i sit in the makeup chair it's fine three hours go by she does my glam to like match the original color uh-huh i look in the mirror worldwide scandal so i have to like wash this tan off like and it's and then now my body's lighter than my face makeup it's horrible thing body makeup with the whole set that day um right before i leave to vegas that day i have to shower off the entire tan i'm furious i want to say this bitch's name i kept saying in my vlog i was ready to kill her like because it was it was like a twenty thousand dollar shoot the dizzy shoot so it was like being late to it like genuinely affected money and a lot of people and it was like i

couldn't show up like that because it was just like a worldwide scandal so i had to like shower it off whatever so i turned my shower on i take a shower i rinse the tan off whole shoot i have to have kkw body makeup from literally my neck to my toes because like my body was now paler than my makeup whatever yeah point being i showered it off in my house in my shower and so you know i hate my house and i don't want to bitch about it too much but my shower makes me miss my shower my old house so much because it's tragic it's freezing cold there's an air vent over it it sucks and you know i already hate showering she said it was freezing cold you know that she keeps her thermostat on 56 degrees well that's a different thing i want it to be like that in the room but why would there

be a fucking air vent over the shower degrees you guys why would there be a fucking air vent over the shower i don't even know whatever anyway and water pressure sucks goes cold in 20 seconds i can't talk about it anyways my shower oh never mind no wait tell me no keep going um so my shower has like options in the shower there's like three knobs like you can turn it on and then it's like there's a rain vibe there's a regular shower vibe and there's like a handle nozzle vibe oh yeah that's tough i know i'm well aware at how i'm sorry i'm sorry no no but also most showers you can like even with the nozzle vibe even in any shower you can take your regular shower and have the nozzle on you know what i mean oh but is it like it's like one or the other so what would i ever use this nozzle for like washing a dog like i'm not like to wash myself with just a nozzle.

I used to shower only with my little nozzle. I was like this. But aren't you freezing doing that? Probably. Terrifying to me. So basically, I always shower with the regular shower. And so I take the shower. I wash my tan off.

I shoot the commercial. Next day, I leave to Vegas, right? No one comes in the house. Everyone on my team is gone on their Christmas vacations. Normally we have housekeepers, but they came and cleaned like a couple of days prior. They're not coming to him back. No one. Hunter's gone. Ari and Mari and I go to Vegas like no one's there. I took the last shower in my shower. Right. Right. So this morning, Brooke brooke i'm like i need to shower i'm still washing off the tan i'm still washing off the tan i'm talking i've showered a good like three times since that

shoot still exfoliating it off i know right unbelievable but it's because i looked insane i look like insane like patches of dark tan and then white tan everywhere. You want to know a key? A magic eraser. Like for the walls? Yes. Yes. Do you know one time I literally graffitied Hunter's walls with lipstick and had to use a magic eraser for everything? Magic eraser solves every problem in the entire world. Every problem.

A magic eraser takes off spray tan. Magic eraser. You're actually telling me a magic eraser takes off spray tan? I'll be like, I swear to fucking God, I'm Amazon priming 100,000 after this. But listen, so today I'm like,

I need to still wash off the rest of this tan before I podcast. Hence why I'm literally, look at my, you've never seen me this pale on the podcast. I'm the color of my shirt. I look insane. Today, I know I'm the last person to use my shower and i know what setting like

like nobody else would have been there no one else i turn i'm on the phone i'm listening to a voice memo i'm holding the clothes i was going to wear on the podcast today in my hand and i go to turn the shower on and the nozzle is facing me and just sprays freezing cold water all over me all over the floor all over the shower all over the room absolutely everywhere

I'm talking I literally go like I scream at the top of my fucking lungs you know I hate unwarranted water that's my biggest maybe the way burping is for you unwarranted water not the unwarranted water.

I'm down for water. Like, I'll get in the ocean, I'll take a shower. Yeah, but like water with no warning. Water that I'm not asking for. Water that I'm not asking for. Sprays me all over the face, wets my entire head of hair. Aw, man. Sprays my clothes, sopping wet.

Aw, man. I start crying. Wait, what? I had a mental breakdown. Why were you in the shower with your clothes on no I was holding my clothes turning on the shower

oh sprayed me I'm like I'm washing me and my clothes oh okay like that was the vibe I've done that but also

who switched the shower nozzle yeah that is really confusing from shower you don't think there's nobody who could have taken a shower in your shower

no no yeah your stalker's back confusing but you don't think there's nobody who could have taken a shower in your shower no no yeah your stalker's back like who switched my shower nozzle i know it's such a random thing but i know for a fact i was the last person to take a regular shower and i never switched it there was no one there camera wise i've seen on the cameras no one was there and then hunter last night was asleep in his bed, and he wakes up to his phone being thrown off the bed and shattered. Oh, man. Can we just, like, explain that?

That's really weird. But then it's like, that gives me ghost vibes. That doesn't give me... No, I agree. I agree. I don't think... No, no, Hunter was laying in bed, and he woke up to his phone being thrown off the bed and shattered.

I'm talking shattered. Like, it's shattered now. Do you think he had a, night terror and he was like? He said he woke up and he saw it like fly off the bed and he doesn't understand. And then I was- Yeah, you have a ghost for sure. Can't, you need to have some, like a paranormal person.

You can even do it for like a YouTube video. You need to have someone who like specializes in paranormal activity come to your house and like literally like- I agree, but it just freaks me out so hard. Yeah, it's one of those things that's like, i want to know as you guys may or may not know like a lady did die in my house before i moved in and they didn't tell me that happily happy lady and she didn't we don't know that she died in the house no no we know she died in the house

like the neighbors know they were there oh they were this whole thing but she was 102 it wasn't like someone killed her or something but it's weird like she had a long she doesn't girl she doesn't regret anything she moved on

she does not want to stay around she was 102 she was already she did enough also I was like right before I left for Vegas I was laying in bed

with a boy we don't need to name the boy but him and I you know you know and I was laying in the boy in the bed I. And I was laying in the bed with the boy. And Ari brought a mattress in my room. And we put it up against the wall.

And it was, like, fully, like, up against the wall. Like, an earthquake would have to move this mattress from the wall. It wasn't, like, a propped up, like, going to fall over. It was, like, a leaning against the wall. Like, nothing. And we're laying in the bed. And the mattress flies at my bed and we both make no noise we look at each other and we're like that was weird yeah you have a ghost and then ari calls me and he goes why did you just scream at the top of your lungs i was dead silent when that happened i didn't make one noise like the

mattress flew at the bed and i was like like silent and he was like i just heard you scream at the top of your lungs i never did i would have screamed no but it's like so jarring it's weird like doors will shut here like a weird like that's what happened to me that's what i was kind of trying to say in the beginning i just had a situation i live on the first floor in my apartment yeah i told you this i know but i forgot about this yeah you please sell the podcast i live in the first floor in my apartment. Yeah, I told you this. I know, but I forgot about this. Can you please tell the podcast? Yeah, I live on the first floor, and I have in my room, like, a sliding glass door, like, a back door, but it's to the side of my building. I don't even, like, I feel like that's bad to say.

It's like, is someone going to come kill me? No. But anyway, I got a ring. But in the middle of the night, I've never, I've never, I've always lived either alone or like my roommates are always gone. I never have felt like fear being alone. I've been sleeping at home alone since I was four years old. Huh? Independent queen camera lady.

Well, no, I'm just like, I don't know why I'm not like really that afraid of things, but. No, I'm the only child with abandonment issues. I can't be alone. I was going to Disneyland the next day and I was so excited. So I took NyQuil so that I would be able to go to sleep early and like wake up early and have a day the next day. Yeah. So I went to bed at like maybe like 10 o'clock and at like 1130, I hear and I knew the sound because I can't get out of that door. I can't use it.

It's not functional to me because the screen is like stuck. So I can't open the screen to it. It's a screen to a bedroom door. And then the actual door, obviously, like it opens. But like if if the screen can't move then i can't get outside of it but i could hear the screen moving and there's like the the side of my building is lit like well lit so it like i can see through the door like straight out because it was dark in my room and light outside so i could see straight out and i i knew i literally knew it in the moment and i just roll over and i see a guy just yanking the door open like he's trying so hard to get the door

he finally gets the door open i jump out of bed so fast obviously but i'm dead silent because i'm for a second i'm just like there's no fucking way like right it's william there's literally no way why do i kind of think it is my soccer because he stalks my best friends i never even that again like maybe i'm just naive but it never came to my mind so i stupidly turned on my light really quick because i was like oh that'll scare him like maybe he'll like stop trying yeah but but then i was like what the fuck are you doing like he's gonna shoot me or something so i ran in my roommate's room he doesn't serve me he doesn't give me shooter either but it gives me like i don't know who this guy is so i'm like why would like i don't know why i would do that like make it known that i'm in the room but he i called the police the police like it was like five police officers

came and they were like oh sorry i can't find him i'm like oh great no i'll sleep i'll sleep fine in here from now on that's a tragic thing about like someone just showing up and leaving is it's like the police like obviously they're like there for you but like if no one's there like when they yeah they just like they told me it's like they were like probably it was probably just like a drunk guy like trying to get in somewhere but it's like right it's not and and then i didn't think i never like it never crossed my mind about like a stalker or anything but i tweeted about it and and then all all the tana fans were like oh william's coming and that fucking all all the Tana fans were like oh William's coming and that fucking all of a sudden now I'm like I can't sleep in my room without being like oh my

god it's because I again I don't mean to like talk about my soccer too much because I hate talking about it because I feel like it fires them it makes me really uncomfortable to talk about it but it's like I've always talked about it so I guess like whatever and at this point I'm at the point where I feel like he's fucking with us so much that talking about it almost makes you feel safer because it's like if i die at least everyone will know i like knew that like what the fuck was up with that yeah but like he's always fucked with me and my like girl best friends so like there's not a part of me that doesn't think it was him that's perfect sorry like sorry i also want to move too there's so many robberies around my house right now well it's just a scary place right now literally like in the like depths of Beverly Hills it's like people are just getting

robbed left and right it's like I don't know daylight like people there's no such thing as like bad LA good LA anymore it's just like everyone's everyone's scared Amari needs to take his Rolex off no entirely and I'm like actually like everyone keeps telling him that because it's like people keep robbing people on Melrose jewelry. Speaking of bad LA, I'm mad at Bryce Hall. Why? And it's annoying because we're touring. Aw, man. Like, no.

That's my new bit. Aw, man. Aw, man. Like, no, Bryce, obviously he's my bestie, but I'm mad at him right now because he said one sentence on the internet that really upset me. And I want to hear your opinion on it. What did he say? Bryce, I love you.

We're touring. You're my best friend. You say some obviously you said some dumb shit and obviously Bryce Bryce is honestly Bryce is one of my favorite friends because it's like I say some dumb shit but he makes me feel like everything I say is like Einstein level like the level of things Bryce it is like the level of like stupidity and the things where I say sometimes and the level of stupidity that Bryce says sometimes her glitching saying that sentence because I'm drunk makes me feel like I'm Einstein compared to Bryce. reacting to reality house the show we just shot which i'm about to talk about with you as well um but he was reacting to it and he verbatim said that he feels like i am more hated on the internet than him and you disagreed yes oh do you think bryce is less hated than me yes oh absolutely i don't and i don't even think it's it's like negotiable i actually genuinely think that that's like really very true see and i hate that but i

don't i don't like i don't think that that's warranted that's not to say that i think that that like should be the case but i think that like women just generally are more hated like like by default and yes but i feel like bryce is so hated like that's our bit like he's got that he's got that like like like cult tiktok following that like of course you have tiktok followers but those people are tana fans like he's got just like tiktok on like on lock yeah oh yeah i'm like are you kidding we're all like addison ray like i think bryce is equally as hated as me not necessarily more but i do think he's equally as hated and i'm sick yeah well we all have we're all wrong

sometimes no i i'm honestly more mad at bryce for just saying it like just like don't say that no yeah he shouldn't have said that maybe and i would be like offended by it for sure because he i mean of course he's he's pretty problematic on the internet. We know that. But he's very deliberate about it. Like you don't think, I feel like Bryce is as hated as me. I feel like our cult followings are, obviously they're different, but I feel like they're really cool. You definitely have like a really loyal following too.

And I think that's true. Stay gorgeous. But his are like, the younger the audience, the harder they go. That's the fact. I'm just sick about it. I'm fucking sick. And the less involved they are in actual like problematic, like you know what I mean?

I feel like you have the older people looking at you heavy. I will never ever say this. I'm serious. I think I'm one of the more hated people on the internet, but I do somehow think I'm less hated than Bryce Hall. Maybe I'm completely delusional. Yeah, it's okay to be delusional. Humble me in the comments. I'm less hated than Bryce Hall. Maybe I'm completely delusional. Yeah, it's okay to be delusional. Humble me in the comments.

I'm just sincerely furious at that. No, I think they're wrong. I think you guys are both like probably equally problematic, but I think any, but what's, I feel like he's more clearly deliberate and you, it almost seems accidental.

That's true. Like I just exist and people want me dead. And Bryce is like, hate me. I hate me. I hate you all. You know what I mean? Yeah. Bryce is like, this is hysterical.

Let's keep it going. Yeah. And yours feels accidental. Yeah, mine's really like, don't hate me. Every time you stumble into something, everyone's like, oh, that, she fucked up. But it's really. You're like, that bitch. She's smarter than you think, y'all.

I don't know. I don't know. I honestly, I'm not even saying it in a way that i'm like very sure of it i'm more like sound off like i like i'm not sure let us know that i believe i could be wrong too i also i feel like i might have a warped understanding because you're like i hate you no but i like i mean i see like day to day like what you get and i don't feel like you i feel like you're way more supporters than you have haters but like

I don't fucking know but the haters that you do have I'm like they are committed I know 100% people want me dead but I'm just saying I don't know I just

I don't know if I agree with Bryce Hall but anyways buy our tour tickets coming soon Brooke's coming eh? that's okay

so do I wait but I want to talk about one more thing what is it? speaking of being hated on the internet me oh she looked at me like no no no no um here's the thing reality house oh no so reality house not big not a big climber herself k Kian and JC have been shooting the show for three seasons. And I desperately wanted to go on the first and second, but things came up.

So it was kind of like a running joke for me to, for a fact, be on the third. And they text me and they're like, please be on the third season. And I'm like, I know because I'm just furious. No, I'm kidding. I'm actually not furious. It was a joke. I'm just furious. No, I'm kidding. I'm actually not furious. That was a joke. I'm just drunk. But they were like, come on third season.

And I was like, okay, listen, I know there's a lot of athletic challenges. I'm not going to be able to do them. I'm not an athletic girl. You're aware of that. I can't walk down the street. I've seen you bust it down at the club. And that's fine. I'll shake some some ass i'll throw some ass easily especially for like some men or some money or some yeah we need we need a real incentive 100k not gonna cut it

well let's we'll talk about that as well but i'm saying point being even no even when it comes to money like like i said on tiktok in high, in middle school, there'd be a field day. There was a field day in middle school where I punched myself in the face and made my nose bleed so that I would be able to go home, so that I wouldn't do it. You didn't feel like there were any other alternatives? No, they were like, you have to do it. And I was like, check this one out. I'm going to gush blood. Before the nose job, that was my big thing.

I could make my nose bleed in four seconds, so I get out of anything like actually my party trick like genuinely and then even in high school there'd be like a mile and i would lay on the ground i walked the mile too i was like shouldn't explain no but even before walking it i would lay on the ground and pretend like i fucking passed out so that i wouldn't have to run the mile it wasn't or walk the mile or whatever it like i'm I'm not agile. Like the most agile thing I can do is like maybe ride a deck. Like I'm not. I mean.

I'm not here. The talent in this one. And even. And even when I work out, it's like walking on a treadmill until I feel like I burn the calories. I've seen she run before. She can run if she puts her mind to it. But like at the same time, it has she puts her mind to it but but like

at the same time it has to be very controlled when it comes to like severe agility it's not in my no yeah i get it you don't give me yeah you don't give me and i told right like thank you like thank you and i told keen and jc i would love to shoot reality house but i will not be able to complete any of the physical challenges and they told me that's fine we want you there to stir up drama be a you know that is her true talent that's her calling they've seen like i've shot reality shows like my thing on a reality show is to come in and just cause chaos and that's just that on that and so we get there and the first challenge is to rock climb a like 20 foot wall like okay spider-man and i said hey i'm not gonna do that also secondarily people are coming for me like i was in it to win it

and it's like it's awesome that i'm doing this and i'm so grateful for the opportunity started watching the show with the with the mindset like oh i think tana's gonna really take this one home that's my point and then i'm there on the show and there's so many people that are that are deserving of the winnings you know what i mean like there's a single mom who's like barely doing internet stuff and like up and coming there's people who just like deserve it want it to win it like the way i'm gonna make a hundred thousand dollars is with the foot pick and that's just that on that okay onlyfans.com shannon mojo yeah i'm gonna fucking i'm gonna post a foot pick i'm gonna post i'm gonna post a butt pick like i'm not going to win a hundred thousand dollars by rock climbing especially if i'm rock climbing competing with agile buff ass men it's not going

to happen yeah you can't snap those nails baby i know you just sat in bed for three hours for those and i was getting paid to like have that look have those nails like have the swarovski crystal moment and i was like listen i i'm not going to rock climb and i never thought in the moment like obviously kian and jc acted very frustrated with the fact that i wasn't going to rock climb but afterwards we had several conversations where they were like we weren't frustrated it was for the drama that night we talked about to rock climb. But afterwards, we had several conversations where they were like, we weren't frustrated. It was for the drama. That night, we talked about it. Right, but then it's shitty

because it paints you in a way that's like, oh, you're just not down to participate with the show. It kind of looked like you were like the delinquent. And it's like, I love the show. I support them. I'll fucking fund it. I love them. I'm so proud of them.

But everybody knew going into it that Tana was not going to climb no rock wall. Like, it just like that. And it like broke my heart because the entire internet is like, why would you agree to the show that you weren't going to do physical challenges? I told them I wasn't going to do it. They still begged me to be on it. I said, OK, to, you know, come in for drama, chaos, fun shit, stir up shit with Bryce, whatever. And secondarily, anyone acts like if I were to win and take home that prize, that anyone would be happy.

Yeah, I know. I feel like at that point, everyone would have been like, there were so many people more deserving. The cancellation would have been 10,000 times worse. Yeah, and then it's like, I climbed that rock wall for nothing if I'm going to still lose the game. So you might as well just get ahead of it and not climb. I can't fucking climb. I can't climb either. imagine me either imagine me like i'm like whoo whoo like grab it like i'm not doing that i can barely fucking walk on a fucking treadmill like hello and the entire internet is so mad at

me for not doing the physical challenges i'm just like that's babe like i said i punched myself in the face to get out of field day in middle school i've been like this since birth and i was i made every single person in the production of that show well fucking aware of that and everyone wants me dead because i didn't fucking rock i'm like baby clear your name she was never gonna climb also even if i did climb i would have placed last yeah that would see i watched the episode baby me and my roommate sat there we watched it we were so entertained After I saw good news is they saw they had that literal spider-man climb the wall It's like after that, why would anyone climb? It's like baby. I know i'm not gonna be faster than that. So it's like Please listen to this. It's my favorite thing i've ever heard in my entire life

So you guys saw that on the podcast before right and you know how she does her sugar daddy thing, right? We're sitting at brunch. And I'm like, I already have to leave within 10 minutes. I went there to take a couple shots and be tipsy for the podcast. I ended up getting really drunk. But that's why I went there. And I'm sitting there with Lila. And she's on the phone with this daddy.

She answers the phone. And she goes, hi, I'm so sorry. I was just in school. I've been doing three years at ucla school is the most important that's admirable school is the the best thing in the world to me it's the only thing that matters like you can have fun but education is the number one point that is so true lila lila's never never set foot in a school in her fucking life she's sitting there telling this man how much she loves going to ucla for 30 fucking minutes at this brunch she's never no like a businesswoman listen to her she now now she's

more respectable in his eyes now he's gonna think of her differently she's brilliant no it's but it's just absolutely and she's right she's just like lying she just maxed out a different sugar daddy's card too on 10 000 can we talk about this for eight seconds ten thousand dollars in postmates oh no are we gonna get her sent to prison she's setting herself to prison i i took one look at her fucking 16 foot christmas tree and i was like what are you postmating to spend ten thousand,000 on postmates? She'll postmates like a couch. She'll postmates things I didn't even know you could postmates. She went to my makeup artist's house like last week,

and my makeup artist had like a LED fireplace that she got on Amazon installed. Super cute. Lila orders it, gets there the next day, realizes she can't set it up, and throws it away. Throws it in the trash can lila come on i'm like no come on i've been with you since the jump no lila she's just she's just insane i want her on the podcast soon like honestly she's got some stories right now she does just every time i talk to her she's like the most entertaining person we had her at my little birthday thing the other night and she literally every single person there was like why don't you bring Lila around more she's perfect

it's funny because I have certain friends though who are like scared of Lila like she's very very abrasive like if you're not down for the crazy friend like like Josie for example Josie will not step she's terrified it's it's it's funny like it's it's very different i'm going to miami with lila this week you are can we talk about that i'm not going i canceled but that's what i want to talk about sorry here's the thing so you guys know um a couple podcasts ago the one that made hunter want to die the tau podcast We talked about that billionaire. Right. That we were kind of on the finesse vibe of.

I love him. I think he has a great personality. Do you? I do. I do. I actually do. He does. It's just different when he's in love with you.

Yeah, I do get that. I get the ick from anyone who gives me, like, don't talk to me. Basically this billionaire. And I love him. And if you're watching this, I fucking love you. I'm going to Miami with him on Wednesday. Right. And I think he wants to marry me.

And it makes life a little hard for me. It does. You actually accepted his marriage proposal in the group chat. He did propose to me, and I said yes. But also, like, it's just very hard for me it's a lot of banter i think and it's like funny and it's like haha but then when it comes down to it it's like oh until it's not um but point being is wednesday at 8 a.m i am going on his plane to miami yes and brooke canceled was canceled love the plug i was on the plane and i'm actually disappointed because we were in a group chat it's like five of us in the group chat

and i had four of the numbers the fifth one i was unsure of so i texted hunter and i was like hey who's this fifth person in the group chat and he goes jordan belfort no i'm sick i'm like not the wolf no i'm fully about to be on a plane with the wolf of Wall Street, Snoop Dogg's son, influencers, and these billionaires. Cordell and Snoop Dogg's son. I went to high school, like grew up with him though, so I've known him forever, so it's not that weird, but I'm saying like

we're all supposed to go on this plane to Miami. It was me, Brooke, Hunter, these two billionaires, Snoop Dogg's son, Tessa Brooks, Bryce, which I just found out is going on this plane. Well, if I knew Bryce was coming, I'm pretty sure Bryce took's son, Tessa Brooks, Bryce, which I just found out is going on this plane. Well, if I knew Bryce was coming, I'm pretty sure Bryce took my spot, right? No, no, no.

Who took my spot? Ari. Ari. Because once you canceled, I put Ari on the plane. But point being is we were all supposed to go on this jet to Miami. Brooke just canceled. Sorry. And I understand you hate Miami.

I hate Miami. That's like a whole thing. Like Miami is my favorite place in the world and it's your least favorite place correct why is it your least favorite place before i've only ever had terrible experiences i believe it um i think it's i like miami so much because i'm from vegas i'll tell you my truth is that i don't i don't enjoy drinking when it's around people I don't know I like I love I love drinking get one thing straight love drinking in environments where I have like a bunch of my friends and like whatever I've made me of course like you guys are going to be there but it's like I don't I don't have control over what everyone's doing and like if I'm just like in a club and

99.9% of the people there I don't know them so you're just like fuck it like why am I doing I've also made so much of a life in Miami for myself that, like, I go there and I see so many of my friends. And I'm sure if I gave it a fair chance and, like, I just, I kind of go into it every time assuming that I'm going to hate it. And then, of course, I do. Well, Miami's also very chaotic and I think you're more, like, planned and LA is, like, a more chill vibe.

Yeah, I want to be, like, in a confined environment of, like, seven people and, like, blacked out. And Miami's such a vibe of, like, everyone's on, like, Molly and, like, no one, like, you know what I mean? I hate, I don't, like, I loved it when I moved here to LA, but, like, now clubbing, it's, like, I can't hear you. I can't see you. I can't, like, why, what's the fun in this? I'm, like, da-da-da-da-da. And I'm, like, clubbing, I'll die on the table and be happy. And it's also, like, I grew up in Vegas. And Miami, in my opinion, I'll die on the table and be happy. And it's also like I grew up in Vegas.

And Miami, in my opinion, is entirely Vegas with the beach. So it like serves me very much like hometown vibes. Like let's be crazy, like whatever. So I love Miami, but I get it. You hate it. I do love like a boat vibe. I would love to just like be on a yacht. Well, hi.

You can still come, please. I can't still come. They gave my spot away. I don't care. I'll literally take it away from someone else. Like Bryce, suddenly you're flying jet blue. Like I don't care. I'll literally take it away from someone else. Like Bryce, suddenly you're flying jet blue. Like I don't care. I want Bryce on the flight.

True. Someone else. I don't even know. But I mean, point being is Brooke bailed on the Miami trip. So did Hunter. I'm not like I'm not hating. I'm just like a primary. Now I'm going.

Yeah, true. You're not going to go without Hunter. But I'm saying point being is now I'm on this jet with these fucking billionaires and all these random people and whatever and like i love miami but i was just in vegas for five days i really don't want to go yeah it's gonna be really like overwhelming i think i really don't want to go i really really really do not want to go and but the the billionaire the guy that we've talked about who's paying for it still all of us are still unsure about whether or not he's a bill right he could be he could be like a fat multi-millionaire i don't even know but i'm saying let's call that's like that's just where

we said that's just his nickname at this point but point being is he has verbatim told me like i will cry myself to sleep if you do not go and like i would love to not go but i feel like i'm yeah you can't bail and honestly i'm proud of you for acknowledging that but you know i really want to i know but now it actually is too late it's too late and it's whatever and worst you poor thing no literally i'm like so i'm stuck on this jet with jordan belfort bryce hall and like a billionaire but i know i get it though like i i mean i didn't want to go, and I'm not going. But I had the good sense to know that I was going to cancel last minute, and I would rather do it earlier where they had time to fill my spot.

100%. But he told me from the jump, like, if you don't go, like, this is a miserable trip for me. And he's, like, paying for everything I'm doing. So I'm like, I should just go. And obviously there's – Well, it's going to be – you're going to have a great time, and you're going to, like, be glad that you went.

But it's just like the getting there that is of course like it's I just want to puke at the thought of Miami right now because I just did Vegas and I'm so sad that you better take a week off I'm like I hope you rest this week I post all these TikToks alleging what I

thought would happen with Bryant Laundrie and a lot of the things I said came true. And I'm weirded out about it. Like, I'm making a worldwide press where I need to read you this. Let me read you this article. Tana Mongeau's TikTok just solved the missing murderer Bryant Laundrie case, and it makes complete sense.

Who wrote that? Right, like someone who does not have accurate brain cells. I'm just saying. Not that I do. Wait, I want to write for the Daily Mail. What do you think? Tana Mongejo isn't just a social media superstar she can now add professional private investigator she wrote this like right like i look right she's like not only is she gorgeous and beautiful like literally professional and private investigator to her resume this sentence i should

have wrote it is there anything she can't do yes like a lot like drive ride a bike okay for months the brian laundry gabby patito murder cases captured headlines that ended in the finding of laundry's remains mosher just cracked open the case on her tiktok by providing a more than logical and plausible explanation of what happened to brian laundry and his family's alleged involvement in the case hello like that's the point oh that's saying that like what I it's just I don't get it like I just said that I felt like there was a chance that he might have attempted his own life even though they were saying that he had passed away for random reasons okay I believe that I would tell myself if somebody was looking for me

and I murdered my girlfriend. Yeah, like, what? I would. I'm just mad at the family, though, for not, like, helping. If you had a kid and your kid committed murder on someone and you were, like, kind of aware of that, would you not, like... I don't know.

It's hard to say. It really is hard to say because it's like you don't know. I don't know what it's like to have a kid and like love them that much but it's true but i'm also very like i i i already you know you're guilty like you know i'm the guilt guy got the guilt complex like that would kill me like knowing and not doing anything about it like it would i wouldn't be able to especially it's like if you love your son and your son has a girlfriend you love her too especially if she's been with him for years and one day why would you do that why would you fucking do that and it's like almost like it's funny amari's mom was just saying to me like if you ever went to

jail i'd fucking like leave you there so that you learned like why the fuck you went to jail and you wouldn't do it again and it's kind of like i was like damn like love you mom wish you'd bail me out but like like fair because it's like if i fucking yeah that i mean yeah for sure i feel like a lot of like people are like that or like people who have to like see their kids go to prison and stuff they're like okay well like if you're innocent okay but if my kid killed someone i kind of would be like maybe go there maybe go to jail did you know what i just did what exactly do you know do you guys know what i burped and i was like see but where does it go like literally just like it just like that's what

it comes it like it's fine you can go like this and then you like swallow it no it doesn't it like it's just you don't have to go no i don't mean i agree i don't really make the noise i'm like a type like i get that but we you and i had a conversation once where i verbatim asked you would you rather someone burp next to you or fart in your mouth and you verbatim answered me that you would rather have someone fart in your mouth farting is farting isn't usually optional like farting is usually like no i had to do that no i almost feel like my asshole's on lock. Like, I could hold a fart for years. Okay, asshole Kegels.

Like, I believe you. I'm just saying, I could like really hold my farts and let it like out. Like a little... Yeah, like not even that. Like a... Okay.

Like it could just come out. Like without anyone knowing about burping, I'm almost like... Like I have to like do something. Okay, well I guess everyone's different, but me personally,

I think that burping is a choice and I think farting is involuntary. But don't you feel like butthole hair... Not hair, sorry. Don't you feel like butthole air is way grosser or more gross? I'm sure it is, and I'm sure if we actually, like, we crunched the numbers, it would, like, I mean, it would probably be, like, a little more. Like, right now, you'd rather me fart on you than burp on you? I mean, I prefer that you don't do, it like it would be none of the above for me that's not the question like if i sat on your lap right now would you have me fart on you or burp on you fart i would i don't know why i don't like i think

that's insane i'd rather someone burp on me 10 times over so when brooke says that it blows my rational and i know that no but that's okay agree. I'd rather someone punch me in the face on some crazy shit than put a bug on me. We know that from that story. Did you ever put out that story time? Which one? When your literal tooth fell out.

No, I was just going through it the other day. Basically when I was dating Chris Miles, we were fucking. And she literally said, beat my ass. And he was like, no. obviously everything was consensual i just want to start it off by saying that but we were fucking and i was like hit me hit me hit me and he was like okay and he kept hitting me harder and harder but i kept saying hit me harder and eventually this was the whole room looked like a murder scene no it was horrible like eventually he like slapped me in the face and then one of my veneers okay yeah exactly it's not like he like broke her nose or something like she has faulty veneers no 100 and so he slaps me my veneer comes

loose and then i started gushing blood and it was completely in pitch black dark and so i was like sucking his dick and in my head i hated the i hated the hand motion listeners that are visual viewers i am so sorry i'm. So I'm sucking his dick. And in my head, I'm like, damn. Like, I try to keep head, like, spitty. Like, I always say, like, it should be very spitty. You don't want any, like, friction. Should be the wettest you can make it.

Give them that toothless, gagless, throat fuck wet 5,000. With that being said, in my head, I was like, this is a little too lubricated. And shit went by, whatever. And then eventually the light comes on and we look at the bed. Could you not tell? No, I promise. Especially with that iron deficiency. I feel like if you tasted blood, you didn't even know.

I never tasted it. I promise you. But I wasn't hitting like a taste vibe either. I was hitting like a ah. Oh, right. Just mindless, toothless, gagless throat fuck. Got it. And so basically we were fucking for like a really long time and then eventually

the light comes on after we're done fucking and there's a pool of blood on the bed that's like I kid you not I wish we could flash up the photos I have them I have them but it looks like someone got killed and I don't know if I want to show it we've done enough to Chris Miles like we do not need to put that on the carpet I'm just talking from like probably the width

of my arms like like, fully extended. Looked like this couch, y'all, on the bed. At least from, like, my wrist to my wrist. Like, this big, like, huge pool of blood looks like someone died. And so I get up and I'm like, did I, like, and I just had my period and ended it. So I was like, there's no way. And then I walked to the bathroom in the room. And my tooth is spewing blood.

I'm not talking, like, bleeding, like, down, like, it's falling down. i'm not talking like bleeding like down like it's falling down i'm talking like like waterfall like like out like fully out like spewing spewing blood and it's all over my body i look like the movie carrie like i'm or like like fucking like what's it jennifer's body like down my entire mouth and down my entire body it's's all over him. So I'm in the shower compressing my mouth like because it's gushing blood. Washing our entire body. I call my dentist. I'm like scream crying

because I'm bleeding everywhere and I'm like dizzy from the amount of blood I'm losing and that's not Dizzy wines out now. That's not a dizzy wine fun. Like I'm actually like seeing stars. Like I'm losing so much blood.

Like I'm spewing blood. Like no lie. Like I'm talking waterfall like completely. And so then my dentist and a doctor shows up they like pack it but then for the next like five days i'm just gushing blood like i'm clotting it every single second like i'm holding gauze to it every i have so many videos of it i filmed a story time about it but it is like it's kind of like a tough situation but when i got done with the story i just felt like i sounded like someone beat the fuck out of me yeah that's true and i know he never did like i

like i was genuinely saying it was consensual and like a mishap happened with my tooth it could have happened like with her like like nudging herself the wrong way but it was just well okay it took a little hit but i asked for it i I said, hit me. Like, I wasn't, like, I wasn't saying, like, don't hit me. I was saying, hit me. Okay. Well, I hope you're not having to say, don't hit me. I'm just saying, I bled for days and days and days. And then I had to get my gums sutured.

I had to get my gums. Not the sutures. I had to get my gums sewn back together. And a new tooth put in. And that did happen during sex i'm gonna stop with that is that you're probably like would you like note that is like your worst worst sex story no oh god people kept asking us on twitter or sex stories do you have one oh absolutely and it's not even a sex story i didn't even have sex with him i told you this. Oh, baby, don't worry.

So you knew about this. This was like at the beginning of mine and your friendship. Like very beginning you were doing, you were still filming like Tana turns 21, MTV, whatever. Trauma. And I remember one night you were like, hey, can you come film this? Like we're going to do like a girl's night out, like whatever. I was like, yeah, of course. And so I went and I was like, you know what? This is going to be like a good pregame to hang out with this guy and the whole night i'm drinking i'm all

excited hang out this guy because he's like he's so he's a musician and he's someone that i like at the time i was a fan of and you were a fan of him too so i told you about it and you were like like but we kept in touch and he was talking to me all day long like just being so sweet like like he'd call me like darling whatever he makes one of my favorite songs of all time he does and he's amazing he's from another country and so he has like a perfect like beautiful accent and he makes these like amazing love songs that are like so romantic whatever so you're like this guy's like a romantic like he's gonna be like such a sweetheart whatever yeah calls me one day in the middle of the day like 11 a.m and he's like middle of the day let's crack a dog to be that's bedtime for tana

and he's like like hey babe like like would you want to hang out today like we could just like have a drink whatever like just like just like a casual day and i was like you know what yeah i go over there i've never met this man i go over there in my pajamas we'd only ever talked on like Instagram and text now but like but like we've never like met we've never facetimed to nothing and I go over to his house and he's so sweet at first like whatever for the first like maybe 10 minutes tops yeah 10 minutes in this man jumps me like he's like not like he doesn't beat my ass but he's like all of a sudden just so aggressively like making out with me and that was like not my bad like babe it's noon yeah like i wanted to have like a cup of tea like sweet kiss like maybe a shot and he's like trying to hook up with me and i

was like kind of trying to like like and it's not like like i wasn't like non-consensual i don't want to make it like a scary story like that it wasn't that way but he goes he's just a little too aggressive in your head he goes he goes call me master i go what he said that yes and it's crazy too because i don't want to talk too much about his music but it's very simp like i love women just sweet like very wholesome like i've oh his music's so wholesome i don't it was his image is like master or like something and in in every time i would say something he'd be like or like he'd be a good girl good girl and i'm like don't don't do that at all i love a good good girl after you've like bought me a gift i just met this man this is our first encounter like that's weird like we haven't he

doesn't know where i'm from yet like yeah so maybe say you're like a weird masochist if that's what you want yeah but like no yeah you're brave as fuck if you're gonna do that the first like the first 10 minutes of meeting someone like baby all i have to do is tweet it and i think you're a weird fucking narcissist like and it wasn't even just like limited to like sexual activity at all it was literally like can i have a water master yes that was that is an actual thing that happened i'd be like uh do you have like a glass of water and he'd be like i think master stop i want to and that's that's so out of character for me too i'm not even like a dirty talker at all i am very like like unless it's like like somebody that like can't relate i'm a whore but i mean no but also in that moment i would have been like can i have a fucking water you weird yeah and i'm just like and and then like to top things off we're just like

we're hanging out like like kind of hooking up a little he's playing his own pandora station like his own music is coming on i also don't care i don't care if you're literally justin bieber if i don't care if you're just you're Justin Bieber do not play me your own music ever. That is the one thing that I will say. I like my the man I'm in love with is a musician and I don't play me

your own music ever. I could not agree with you more. Send it to me and I'll listen to it by myself but if I'm gonna have to you're gonna have to watch me listen to it and I'm gonna have to think

about how I'm responding if I'm doing the right thing making the right faces. Don't do that to me. And it's fine if we're like friends or if it's like over time you're like I made this song can i please show you it okay like but first day

you're like check this one out and it's like nine songs and you know my type is entirely musicians so i've dealt with this so much it makes me want to jump off the empire state like when you sit down with a guy and he's such a fucking narcissist he's like it's like it's my it has nothing to do with them it's like 90 of the time it's like okay i'm gonna love the song and i'm gonna like you know what i mean it's not it's just awkward trying to react i feel nervous like am i like am i am i bobbing my head enough like like what am i what do i do and then like god forbid too when it's terrible and you're just like i love it and i can't That's the problem. I can lie and I love lying. But in those situations, in those situations, like I don't want to lie. Like I want you to suffer for what you just did to me.

One hundred percent. It's trauma. I've done that with like 30 people. Unfortunately, because I just attract narcissists who make either good music or horrible music. It's really tricky. And like I feel bad because I don't want any of my friends to ever think like oh you think i can't show you anything but it's like it's just like like especially if i'm talking to you or whatever and it right like you said it's how you do it if you're like okay i need your critiques that's one thing but if you're like check out

this song i just mean no exactly it's like one thing that if i know you and you're like i heard this music but when you sit down with a guy on a first date and he's a musician he's like I just made this shit it's fire and then shows you nine songs after that you're like I get it shot I get it but like chill the fuck out like it's just such a thing with musicians because like a lot of times well it's the same but like not that I'm like I'm not much of an artist myself but imagine if I sat down with a guy and was like oh my god look how funny is this tiktok i just made like it's just like it's exactly like i just think that narcissism is not it it's so funny like no that's embarrassing and you can laugh at it on your own time but like i don't want you to have

to laugh at it in front of me should we go should we go on a throuple date i just sent you flowers and said that um i'd love to have a threesome with you soon she sent me flowers the card said at least i could do something on time. And it was a day late. Dude, but I'm not going to lie. I paid an exponential amount of money for it to be on time. So I blame the flower company. You door dashed them. They were from door dash.

Oh, then that's on Kyla. I paid. Well, I knew it. I paid $150 extra for it to be there on your birthday. I got the door dash notification. She door dashed them. And she. That's on your birthday. I got the door dash notification. She door dashed them. That's on Kyla. Second sentence, though.

Second sentence, though. I sent you flowers. I asked you to have a threesome with me. That was very sweet. I love this Brooke and Tana cast. And I will eat your butthole later. And I would die for Brooke. And we're killing it at the canceled shit.

So now I'm going to fuck off because I'm drunk. But I love you. Love you too. Can't wait for our next threesome. I would die for you. Thanks for tuning in to this week's episode of Canceled. Tana Moia is cancelled