Castle Super Beast - CSB 026: You Must Not Let The Pepsi Damage Stack

Episode Date: July 16, 2019

Download for Mobile | Podcast Preview | Full Timestamps The Colonel says: Your fat black Chinese Chocobo awaits behind a glut of suffering and agony, baked with 12 original secret herbs and spices. You can watch us record the podcast live on twitch.tv/castlesuperbeast Doordash: Right now, our listeners can get $5 off their first order of $15 or more when you download the DoorDash app and enter promo code SUPERBEAST. Raycon Wireless Earphones: Go to http://buyraycon.com/SUPERBEAST to get 15% off your order! Stitchfix: Get started today at http://stitchfix.com/superbeast and get an extra 25% off when you keep everything in your box! Outro: MYRONE - Drift Stage Arcade Theme Japanese interview from Famitsu reveals all old models had to be recreated from scratch Nintendo announces Switch Lite: the long rumored portable-only Switch Vampire Hunter D Creator Announces New Anime Chinese FF14 players are eating inhuman piles of KFC to earn Chocobos The Dark Pictures Anthology: Man of Medan multiplayer modes announced The Ninja Warriors: Once Again launches worldwide July 25 Shenmue III backers will not receive retail exclusive content Xbox Germany announces Final Fantasy VII Remake for Xbox One, promptly deletes post Respawn will deal with Apex Legends cheaters by making them fight each other

The Funeral My air conditioning is off because it's not too comfortable today or in this country in general. It's hot so I'm gonna do pretty much everywhere. Gonna do some magic later to make sure that it doesn't affect the quality too much but as far as live goes you're gonna hear it. It's the magic that comes in post-production. See how I did that? I did that in my brain just like that. I don't even know what you're talking about. What can we do? But yeah, I'd like to apologize to everyone. The podcast is slightly late today because I fell back asleep. I woke up at a reasonable hour and then I saw my cat and went all you're cute and then I hugged him and

then fell right the fuck back asleep. Is it safe too? Are we talking about the reasons for a late podcast? Yeah, okay. Yeah, that's me. That's all me. It's like petting a cloud. That sounds nice. Have you ever pet a cloud? Yes, you have. I've seen it. That sounds nice. Yeah, okay. And then Wally stole my energy drink. You did preemptively put one here. Yes. In anticipation. I did. And you had three. Yeah. You left one. I did. And then I did drink. I should have wrote my balls on it. You know, by the way, but you do know what I do to the tops of those cans. Later on, yeah. No, but that was boxed. No, I saw it in box. I took it out of the box. Okay, but because you got two cases. Now

that's technically just one down from the positive. One of those cases was mine. But you got two of them. Did I have two of them? Yeah. So I actually owe you a case minus 95 Red Bulls or whatever the fuck. Oh, in the end, I suppose. I will gladly give you 100 Red Bulls, but you have to drink them all in during one podcast. Will I get a chocobo if I do that? Yes. Okay. Yes, you will. The chocobo that will ascend you to the heavens as you obviously die. What is wrong with them? With who? With KFC? Oh, we're gonna have fun on that story. We'll save it for the story. There's a fun story. There's a fun story. But before story time comes other story time, week time, story of your week. So more like story of your strong. That sucks. You suck. Would you do that? That's yeah. Oh, boy, we need

touring real bad. See this, this is coffee. That's that's for pussy. Get out of here with that. This doesn't do it. It's not it's all it doesn't have enough co branded flavor. Mm hmm. Babe, you know, I love you, right? Cool. Just check it. Yeah, just just checking that you know, she's got a rock on her hand. She knows, dude. Just checking. Yeah, I was I was home all day yesterday. I'm just checking. It's cool. He's just you know, no reason in particular that I'll come back at some point in the possible future of this episode. No, I'm not you know. See, if you make it a bit, then it maybe it'll happen. That's just as somebody who makes a lot of bits of this nature, like that's you can't that's not maybe the the off like maybe the peer pressure. No, no, peer pressure is not the same as on

camera. If you put like a mystery liquid in front of me right now, because I'm on stream, there's like at least 5% more chance that I would drink it as opposed to off stream. Not to mention that the moment everyone is wise to what's actually going on, they would actively root for her to not get any energy drinks. That's correct. To help us out because the worst the podcast gets. I have an actual caffeine addiction. That's stupid. Most everybody does. So whatever. Um, I I I'm definitely at the point where when it's not in my routine, like it takes me way longer to rev up. Yeah, I don't not rev up, but it takes a while. Well, hey, let me ask you a second question. Let me let me ask you a quick. Hey, so you have a caffeine of any kind at least once a day?

Yes. Do you go on like you're on a plane or you go somewhere, you know, whatever, and then you just don't have a caffeine for one day? Well, I take it in the morning to get to the point. No, but what I mean is like, is there ever a day? Oops, I forgot a caffeine today. Yeah. Do you feel bad that day? No. I don't feel bad. Okay. I just it takes me longer to wake up. Okay. That's kind of how I go. Okay. And if I don't have anything that needs me that day, if you feel bad, that's how you know, you got it. No, if I don't have anything pressing that day, then I don't care about waking up. It's not that important. Maybe I should just put caffeine

packets in water. I mean, is that healthier? I told you about the caffeine pills. And he offered me caffeine pills at one point. I know that, like, it just feels weirder because of the format. But it's rubbing it in my cums. But it really is like one pill is one cup. That's, you know, but it just you don't like that because pills are usually not that pills are usually much stronger than one. You don't like that. Why? It takes time to drink a drink. Yes, you could pop a pill in like a second. Yes, that's correct. If it's not working, you can do another one. Yeah, another one. Yeah, another one. But that's also an espresso, right? Yeah, I don't drink espresso. When I've done that a couple of times. I don't drink, I don't

drink espresso for a stupid reason. Because for most of my life, I called them expressos, because express is fast. Yeah, a lot of people thought that and then I got corrected. I felt stupid. Yep. And now I don't like them anymore. The entire beverage. It's a it's a it's a trick beverage. One correction. It's a piece of shit that exists there to mock you. And that's it. That's it written off, banned. Okay. I also don't like them at all. Yeah, they're bitter, like they're very bitter, but it's a shot. It's a it's a it's a purpose built food. It's not a it's not a oh my do this is espresso. Yeah. Like you know how like one beer is like a shot. Yeah. So it's just a faster way of getting it in you. Yeah, it's that basically. Yeah. But um, but of course, it's

still scalding hot. So you can't actually drink it as fast as you have to wait 10 minutes. Yeah. And then you drink it. That's why I like the cold brew. And that's why I actually like energy drinks. It's not even about the taste or the the Tori. I prefer cold drinks to hot drinks. Yeah, I can drink them faster and I can get where I need to be quicker. Yeah, I don't need to wait on the temperature of the coffee. It doesn't scald your your your your your butt. Now, like I have been told that like, well, that's part of the charm and the ritual is by getting a hot cup of coffee. It forces you to slow down your pace to enjoy it. Get fucked old man. Exactly. We're living in the information age. The super highway is waiting. I have a podcast I'm already late for nearly every

week because I'm a lazy piece of shit. When is the last time someone's called it the information super highway? Did I just call it that? You called it the information age. Okay. Okay. I dodged it. I dodged it. You didn't. You didn't. You're old. You're old, old man. Take that. I don't even remember which one of us is older now. You are. It's me, right? Yes. It's always me. Always. What about next year? Well, we got to do the numbers. Okay. Gotta crunch on that. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, even if I were older, like, look at me. Yeah, I'm fine. My hair. I lose your hair has no indication of age. I lost it early. Hey, I'm getting I'm getting grades in the beard. I'm

getting pepper. I'm getting salt and pepper in the beard. I'm also getting pepper. But I like it. Like, I like it. It's fine. I like it as long as it's in the beard and not up top. Yeah. That's that's the only that's that's the thing. I know for a fact that up top, it's going to stay pretty much this shade until I'm like 80. Yeah. It's just going to leave more and more. Yeah. See, like the facial can shave and go away. You can get rid of that easy. So it's all flavoring until you don't want it anymore. But yeah, whatever you got up top, I don't know. I had this for so long that if I get rid of it, people are like fucking. Where's your fucking head go you fucking baby weird egg person. I'm gonna let everyone in on a secret. What's the secret? Oh, no, I should

probably I'm probably going to stick with the blonde dreads in the state that my hair is in for a while. I don't believe you. I'm going to stick this way. I believe I believe that you believe you. Yeah. But I don't believe you. So here's why that's going to happen. It's because every time you you color them up, you got to bleach them back. Yeah. And it does a little bit of damage, not that much. But the last time it got a little bit dicey, right? And like the bleach came off and I washed everything and rinsed it and it felt weaker than it ever has. And I was like, Oh, blood. And I was like, Oh, I don't want. Yeah, the string like literally there's a strength to your dreads. There's literally a power. So what is what is the end result if you overdo it?

Like it's just literally like a dread will just pop off. Right. Look at the length of this one. Yeah. Look at the length of this one. Pop off. Yeah. A couple of these on this side actually shortened up. I wanted the trim look because of the Killmongering style anyway, but ultimately a couple of the short ones were not voluntary. Okay. So I'm like, all right. Time to lighten up on that. That's how that goes. There's a like by stop lightning it up. There's a yeah. Bleach. Yeah. Each dread has a health bar on it. Bleach is the most toxic thing you can put on your body. Each dread has a health bar on it. And I manipulate them accordingly for the style I want to look like. But like there's a couple because the ones in the back are way stronger than the ones up front.

Yeah. Because the ones in the back just kind of sit there and power up. Yeah. They don't get used as much whereas the front lines get used all the time. And when you do like a ponytail, like the ones in the front are getting yanked and the ones in the back or not. Therefore, you know, it's a whole thing. I'll take your word for it. Yeah. Hair. Yeah. It has things going on with it. Yeah. Even when you had yours, you never really let it grow out. No, not really. Let it grow to hobo length at one point and then immediately go because my hair is like not only is did this middle part decide to leave real early, even when you first met me and I was 17, it was already starting to go.

But it's also crazy, crazy curly. So not much to be done other than get rid of it. You also look like disgustingly French when you have full hair. Yeah. And I don't know if you want that, but I'm assuming you don't. Occasionally for a fun, maybe. Like like like horribly French. You look really I'm actually unfamiliar with this new like this new judgment. There is a quality. There's a quality. There's a slider of Frenchness that just gets ticked way the fuck up. You know, my first name isn't Pat. It's actually Jean. Yeah, exactly. Jay starts to get drawn in and the J. J. J. P. Jean Patrick. Oh, no. No, no.

Gross. Yeah. What would you would you play? Oh, the usual, but Warframe is back this week. They did the night waves and a bunch of them are broken. Good job. Good job, guys. You did it. So to clarify, night wave is this thing that Warframe does they replace. They used to have this alert system where like at any random time of the day, it's like, Hey, there's an alert. You can get this item, right? It would be up on your phone. It'd be up for like two hours. And yeah, you cap on you get an app on your phone. And that alert system sucked ass for a number of reasons. One is getting an app getting up hang on your phone when you're out of the house means shit, right? And the other thing is that certain things would

just like not show up for like a full month. It's like, Hey, man, I need to get the head the head part for Valbon. Am I at home when it pot? No. And also it's not on an alternate cycle. It's on a 24 hour cycle and you have two hours, three, five, 30 minutes, like whatever, drop what you're doing and go log in. The other thing is that the rewards for a lot of them were like hilarious. So it's difficult to kick this down the road for somebody who doesn't play the game. But let's take you. So one of the things that you do in the game is you level up mods, like you'll get a mod that is like plus 10% damage. But if you level it up all the way, it's plus 140% damage, right? That takes a currency called Endo takes 40k Endo, an alert would pop up and be like, Holy shit, do these five

waves of defense for 200 Endo. And you'd be like, No, I'm not going to do that. That's like, literally nothing. Or you can get like 500k, like in terms of money, like credits off of like a single mission. And then an alert will pop up and like only available for two hours, you can get 1500 credits for this interception mission, which takes 22 minutes, like, even like, no, no, so it sucked bad deal. So they invented this new thing, which is kind of like a battle pass where it's every week, there's a series of challenges, you do the challenges to get points, you rank up the thing over a series of like 12 weeks. Yep. It's always been fun loading into these because this is their second time around, they've improved it somewhat. But like week two, oh, wow, the shittiest challenge

from the entire last series is back immediately. And now it's twice as valuable. And thank God, somebody helped me do it, because I would not have been able to do it. And one of them is one of the fucking challenges for the week is bugged and doesn't show up on the list. The only reason I knew to do it was that I accidentally did it. But I just did it. And then it popped. I'm like, Oh, that's fucked up. But cool, I got it. Yeah. Awesome. Is the challenge system something where most games that do that kind of well, no, how should I put this? Have you ever had something where like the thing they're asking you to do is really boring compared to the rewards you're supposed to get. Yes, you've tapped out. Hell yeah. Okay. So you're

not willing to do whatever the fuck. There's a Warframe streamer man named DK Diamentes. He's he's a nice man. I'm in his clan. I was like, Hey, give me a spot. He's gave me a spot. If I had not gone into that clan chat and been like somebody fucking helped me do these goddamn silvergrove specter bullshit, I would not have done it because that's that's because it sucks. Yeah. Yeah. I look and I go, I want that reward and then I see the thing, the pathway to it. And if it looks abysmal, I'm not in right now. I'm someone in and then there's a thing is that like in real life when like whenever we're trying to set up a game or something's not working, I'll sit there for hours and tinker until it works. That's right. I'll do that.

There's a difference in turning something on and like just working at and it sucks and versus there exactly versus the reward of it. I like literally just this weekend trying to figure out how to get into the Ghibli Museum was such a nightmarish task that like eventually when an application went through, I basically got to the point of I don't care anymore. Yeah. And I love Ghibli and I would fucking it would be great. But everyone involved, it was just like, nah, this is so dumb and obfuscated that the reward is not worth it. I'm not going to care whether or not I actually end up getting this. It sucks. Now that existing in an MMO on a regular basis, not an MMO, but a Luke shooter, dude, at this point, I don't know what Warframe is. Okay.

But do you point at the thing that you're like that part would help me make so what so what they did is you only go I want the 12 we thing, you only have to complete 60% of all of the things to max it out specifically so that once or twice a week, you can go fuck that one. I do that one. Fuck it. But then what if that frame is going to get archived? No, that no, this is a totally different thing. Okay. Well, what nightwave gets you basically they just get you a part that lets you get a frame. No, okay. What nightwave does is it gives you the ability to get unique weapon mods, not a big deal. Okay. A unique types of whatever a couple unique little nice things that don't matter. Yep. Some cosmetics that are unique to it. And the final the final thing like Rank 30

is always a cosmetic that is pretty much never going to come back. And it's Hey, did you reach rank 30 in this season of Nightwave? Then here is a fancy cosmetic for you to show that you did it. And those cosmetics are spectacular. Okay. They have so far been like some of the best cosmetic things they've ever put in the game. And it's like, I don't care about ranks one to 29. I just want that rank 30 reward. That's it. It's a pretty skin for my space doll. See, every time you guys talk to me about like these these moments and these types of elements that are like crucial to the reward system in these games daily, weekly, whatever, etc. Like it's it's not poisoned. But it's like it is rule. It is a magnet pushing against me that like if I walk forward that pushes me back. I have

so there is a there is a a core of this that does that that you're not seeing because no one's talking about it. And that is I like jumping around and shooting things in Warframe. Yeah. So just slightly directing me towards an interception mission instead of a defense one when I was going to play Warframe anyway. Yeah. And there's like occasionally there'll be one like I wasn't going to do that but like oh yeah, I'll go I'll go get some fish. I could use some fish in Warframe right or whatever. I learned a lot about like how much I'm willing to put up with when I was playing Monster Hunter World. Monster Hunter Worlds is terrible. You know, Monster Hunter Worlds implementation of that shit is awful. It is really, really bad and it is new to world. It did not exist in the old games.

They would give you they every week you'd get event quests and be like here's the new event quests and they would just stay forever, forever, forever. And if you want to do them, you do them. Yeah, none of this weekly festival fucking crap. Yeah, the yeah, it that that taught me my limits, you know, like I'm like I look at one thing and be like do the requirements to get to that thing and that it gives me the next one that's like the better version of that thing. And I'm like, no, I'm good. I'm good. Oh, hey, look, Dante, you're good being bad. You know. Yeah, it is what it is. So like a good example is 14s like way of doing it is okay, growing up all the classes I want to say I'm at the equilibrium. Right. I want to do the new content stuff when it comes out

like I want to do oh there's a new raid that came out or oh there's new boss right by playing that half hour a day and getting the currency to buy the fancy new gear. I go into that later boss fight more prepared to actually complete it as opposed to just not. Mm hmm. Yeah. And basically the times that I fall off like you've noticed that with 14 I play it for like super hard. And then I fall off for six months. That six month period is I don't want to log in every day. I don't want to do these things every day. So then I just stop playing for six months. Right. And that's why of all these genres, if they're smart, they put in catch up mechanics.

So you like in a fighting game in the round, you have a comeback mechanic in the in the in the grindy ones, you have a catch up mechanic. It's like a big round in a fighting game. Cute. If I were to more meter so what I was so that you can you can do the super, which is the encounter like a fighting game. Hey, fuck stick. Listen, in the situations, when I play and get into something that I'm actively playing daily, like there's a point where I was playing Darkest Dungeon daily. Yeah. Or there's a point where I was playing into the breach daily. Yeah. Right. Those are things where it's just like, I'm thinking about that gameplay no matter what. Yeah. So I understand. Let's go play it. Yeah.

So anything else you put in it or throw at it or whatever. Why not? Because I'm going to be here playing it anyway. Yeah. Right. Hey, to run run a fucking dungeon with four antiquarians, I'll give you 10 K monies. Yeah. Well, I don't understand that. And I would and I would say that if there was a loop in one of these games where that was happening where I felt like I'm logging in because I want to feel this play this gameplay today every day for a while. Then yeah, that would totally work for me. But the core needs to hit that point where I give it that much of a shit. That's why that's why it's easier to get people in a warframe than it is to get into Final Fantasy, because way more people enjoy jumpy, shooty run melee swords than MMO buddy

button clickies. Whereas if you were to make that little extra bit, the core of what you're supposed to do slash the core of what's supposed to appeal to you. And then the actual daily gameplay thing is not really much. It's like it's mainly about that reward. You lost me. Yeah. You know, this is why when the Stormblood expansion came out, I I out of the two year expansion time I played that game for maybe six months, because I like to play a certain class and that class stopped being fun to play the visuals with its abilities, the flow of what it didn't like it. Yep. So barely played. Now, I like it. So I'll play more. And that's that. That's how that works. Also, I finished Hat in times Nyaakaza Metro.

Hat in times what? Nyaakaza Metro. Is that a campaign DLC? It is a campaign DLC. It's an extra world they added. Cool. It's called Nyaakaza because the Yakuza are cats. Nya. Yeah, right. Yeah, it is the most overt. We love this other game series thing in a game I have ever seen ever. Okay. Because it's shot like the Yakuza series. There are vendors which sell you foods which combine to give you bonuses like the Yakuza series. And there is a secret boss fight with Meowjima. Wow. Who jumps out of a manhole and yells kawami means extreme. And calls you Hat Kid Chan. Okay. And also apparently that's my fault. Because the Yakuza Zero LP got the Hat in time people into Yakuza. Is that what happened? Yes. Oh, wow. And I made

the joke. Haha. You know, I make the funny, silly joke. Haha. I created Hat in time. And then a guy asked me in chat. Actually, the team got into Yakuza because the Zero LP. What's that, Jeff? What's that? Oh, that I invented Warframe, sports, rap, music, et cetera. I invented these things. You invented Hat in time? I invented Hat in time. How? I wore a hat once. Okay. Therefore, but no, this one's actually for real. Okay. On this one. So you're welcome. But yeah, no, that's a that's a fantastic piece of DLC. I that game is so a plus all the time, except for everything about the way the game runs and functions. See, it fights me every time I stream it. Every time I streamed it, I went at the beginning, the first 10 minutes is the win. I

can't see it. You they can see it, but it's a white screen for me. Now I have to say I'm very curious about like your aversion to the Banjo-Kazooie type games. Oh, because Banjo-Kazooie sucks. I played it once when I was a child and it sucked ass. But what about those types of games? You mean like 3D platformers? Yeah, I love all the Mario games. Okay. Hat in time is great. Okay. Spank goes ban ban co and Crash Bandicoot and Spyro. Crash Bandicoot's awesome, but it sucks. Spyro. Never played. Never played it once. ukulele. I heard that was a worse Banjo-Kazooie, which means it would suck times too. I just think Banjo looks like a stupid idiot. Okay, I thought you had both everything. No, man. Okay, I was playing Mario Odyssey. I was right there playing Mario

Odyssey with you guys. I don't know if I like hat in time better than Mario Odyssey. I think I brought this up the last time like I was playing it a bunch something about the the movement and like the tone and it's also about one tenth as long, but doesn't feel like there's like every every timepiece, which is your fucking star moon, whatever the fuck has a unique level to it. It's not just like, hey, you but you but stopped on this fucking treasure map spot idiot, you get a moon. Yeah. No, I definitely grabbed it and meant to take a look much earlier. Some of the DLC isn't out on all the platforms and it's like, it's a weird, it's weird. And also I encountered this awful bug, which like basically killed the cutscene of the New York is a Metro DLC, like it just didn't

play. Okay. And it was the cool cutscene that sets it up with the cat crime people and the whole thing. And I was sad and then I didn't play it. And then they fixed it the next day with the patch notes going, sorry, Pat. I'm like, Oh, right. Yeah. Yeah. Right. But then I still had to go into the console and force the cutscene to play in the in the cheat console. Yeah, man. No, I remember like, like at some point last year when I was when I was trying to get a one off together for that, but it's fucking good. Yeah, it's a good game. Yeah, it's also adorable. Had kids the best. She looks cool. Use hats. You know what one of the hats is? Time stop. Straight up time stop. Well, duh. Yeah. It's the name of the game. Like people kept saying, like, oh, Pat, you can't do

this. Just wait for time stop. And I'm like, haha, funny meme, guys. Good memes. Oh, it's I was the meme after all. I'm still thinking about Galaxy. Yeah, really liked Galaxy. Yeah, you know why? Because you're right. It's good and you should like it. Yeah. And you were right to like it. And are you talking Galaxy one or two? I didn't play Galaxy two. Guess what? It's really good. Yeah, it's it's more Galaxy. Yeah, they should re-release that. And I like I because I was talking about it on something recently when we were talking about Odyssey and Mario games and someone went someone pointed out someone wrote a big thing about why Galaxy is not as good as Odyssey. And I remember just reading it and going like, no, no, no, I just couldn't disagree more.

I had a really good time with that game. Mario 3D land also very high quality planet to planet gameplay was super fun and refreshing. And I enjoyed it. Do you think it's stupid that you can't just play both Odyssey's and 3D land and 3D world on the switch right now? Both Odyssey's? Yeah. But whatever the galaxy there it is. This is tough. This is tough today. This is a tough podcast. This is a hard work. Difficulties very high. You should be able to play every Mario game of note on every system that comes out. Yeah, sure. A lot of things should be. Yeah. And certain things are not. Yeah. But I am a full full on fan of that which is. Oh, yes. Yeah, I agree. Sure. Mario should be playable. And I

should be able to play Galaxy on my switch. Did you play Teppin? Did you play Teppin? So I saw a bunch of people on my timeline going, oh, yeah, Teppin, I got a Wesker deck. Okay, hold on, hold on, hold on. Did you play Teppin or did you launch the app? Neither. But follow me on this journey. So I'm sitting there going, everybody on my timeline is talking about their Rathalos deck or their Wesker deck and I'm like, what the, what happened? And then I'm like, oh, it's Teppin. So I'm like, hey, is Teppin good or is it just free? It's like, is it a good, what's to happen? And then somebody posted like a gift of like a fucking dog lover like from community going, yeah, it's good. Right. And I'm like, whatever. And then people were like, ah, it's free

card game. It's right. And then I went back and looked and like, oh, that was the at play Teppin account. Yeah. And then started the silence brand. And I was like, yes, brands. But did you play Teppin? Okay, because I played it. Okay, good. Because this is where I want to go. What? What? Teppin? You didn't play Teppin? No. Did you download Teppin? No. But I saw that you could have like somebody's like, I'm enjoying Teppin since I got my Nair Gagante deck. And I'm like, what? Teppin is proof that Capcom versus Capcom could work. No problem. Because there's a shit zillion characters. Easy. There's so many. If you have enough characters to make a fucking collectible card game. Exactly. Exactly. It's proof that it'd be fucking cake to make it. I played enough Teppin to

do what? What did I do? I did the tutorial, which is a couple of fights. The moment you started up, you have to do a re-u tutorial series of like maybe three or four fights with like little cut scenes in between. And then I unlocked Dante. So you play through Dante's story and then you unlock him as a deck. It's a card game. How does it work? But it's like, do I put the... Well, here's the problem now. This is where my complete lack of experience with this genre. This is good. Use that. Use it. Like comes in to bite me in the ass because there's timing attack lines. Oh, that's not normal. So things are happening on an ATB-ish system. That's really not normal. Yeah. So it's not like my turn, your turn. It is put your thing down, put your card down, and you have

three lanes. And as soon as you put a card in that lane, then the damage number coming off of that will create a line of that damage going to your opponent. And if they have three cards in that lane, then you either attack the card. And if they have no card there, you attack the user. Yeah, okay. That's Hearthstone rules. Is that it? Okay. Magic rules. It's like cards are there to protect you from damage. But do these things have timing lines? No. It's almost... It's near universally. Okay, I played my card. Okay, you played your card. Now I'm dead. Yeah. So this has active time play. And there's an element of like, oh, shit, get my defense thing in place before it comes. Oh, no, the line's right there. So there is time involved in it. I understand. Yeah,

I don't understand much either. But you can also do things like... Are you comboing? You can do combo. You can do combo. Because you can drag certain cards from your... So you have five at the bottom of that from your thing, and they all refresh after a certain one gets played. Okay. And then certain some of them you can grab and drop them on your opponent or like in the ring or on their card or whatever. And then it'll do like a... It'll stop the action. It'll stop all the lines. Okay. And then I think they have to answer back with their card. And then you can stack and stack and stack and go back. So I have a question for you. So people are saying, oh, my Wesker deck or my Dante deck, does that mean it's like you have Dante and it's still my cry

characters or it's like rebellion as a card or what? Okay, so I have a Dante deck or rather I have Dante as a character. Okay, you have Dante, right? And he's there and he's like got his sword on his back. I'm Dante, hey. But then in his deck is a bunch of other Capcom characters on cards. And or like Ryu, for example, has Ryu there, but then he has a Sean card. He has a Sakura card. Okay. And then he has a bunch of other characters from just random Capcom characters. And then you play those. Okay. And then when you get Ryu's special moves like his Shinkuhidoken, those are attack cards or whatever that he does as Ryu, but pretty much having Ryu as your avatar is looking at screenshots right now is less of a thing. And it's more like Dante versus weirdly sexy X. Have

you seen that design? Yeah, new X. Yeah. What's up with the thong, man? It's, it's, you know, X. So probably the weirdest part is I look at a screenshot of like what the game looks like. And I'm like, what the fuck is happening? It is very unclear from a glance. After playing a bunch of them, I'm still unclear exactly what's happening. Dynamic animations. Oh, that's to make your stupid brain go. They, they make, they, I have to say this, you know, when you take like a single like CG painting and then Photoshop smudge the shit out of it to make it. Yeah, do the, the vanilla where flat animation thing. Yeah. This is doing the maximum with that. Okay. This is like as much as you can get, but it's still a bouncing painting. Oh, let's see. This

is made by Gungho. This is not a Capcom game. Well, there you go. It's, it's doing big, big painting squash and stretch and slide and smudge. But did you have fun? I didn't really understand what was happening. However, and it made me go, is this the grand blue? Is this how the, that's different. The hearth, that's, that's a much dumber different. Well, in any case, the hearthstone, maybe. Yeah. And it actually, it's funny enough, it reminded me of the auto chess games that I was playing a little bit early. Actually, it's part of the right formula. It feels like that where you just kind of like you pick the thing and then it goes. And then they pick their thing and then they go and then you clash against each other and then you until

I'm going to ask people this later or now or whatever. But like, cause currently being a hearthstone player, part of the gameplay formula is suffering because hearthstone sucks. And the only people that tell me that are people who play hearthstone, people are unhappy, but the white blues are treating that game. And I don't know if this game even is like has been alive long enough for people to know whether or not part of it is suffering. The real question and the honest question, cause you can't, you can't ask me if it was good or not. Cause I don't know what the fuck a good card game is. I'm not, I don't have that. All right. Well, who are you right now? Are you a consumer? Are you the person making the card game? The question is, is what I play this

if it didn't have Capcom characters in it? No. Of course not. Hard pass. Yeah. Woolly. You, like there are fighting games that you probably wouldn't have played if they didn't have Capcom characters in it. Like Capcom fucking evolution. Would you have played a game that looked like Capcom evolution if it didn't have Capcom characters in it? Capcom fighting jam? No, I would not have. So that's not true. I would have because I actually, well, you're a weird, I strive to play all, I try to strive to play. Yeah, but you know what I'm saying, right? Yeah. But, but, um, anyway, having recognizable characters that you like is both cheap and important. Yeah. So, which is weird. I don't know how to feel right. So I'm looking at all my

morrigan art and my Virgil's and my, and my, my X's and my Sean's and my Oro's. And I'm like, Hey, I know that. Hey, that's the endorphins. Yeah. I clapped when I saw it. I remember. Yeah. But did you buy when you saw it? No, I didn't see that's, that's the real, that's the real kicker. Um, I think it's probably like, I don't know if where it stacks up compared to the other games of that type, but like it certainly is a time waster. I have a, it doesn't really feel like if it doesn't, it didn't feel at that level, like there was much to do besides like race the line. Yeah. It's not just somebody and the number one like thumbs up for it compared to other ones is that it's fast. Yeah, it is because the matches are fast. It forces you to, to, to, to play quickly

and drop things before you get attacked because when you take that damage, then, and then you can stack it and shit like that. But yeah, I don't know, man. I mean, it, it, it does seem a little bit simple and, you know, like, I'm not sure how complex matches can get. See, that's because you're an idiot. You don't know anything about cards, man, but there's so much hidden depth. Well, MTG has all kinds of crazy meta to it, right? MTG is the, is, I believe it invented the word meta. Right. So there's all that shit. Oh, I got my green, my green deck so that I'm not even going to try. I'm not even going to try. I'm not even going to tap, tap your card. Yeah, tap it. Yeah. All I know is that this is a, yeah, it's a time waster and it felt pretty similar to the

auto chest type of thing where you're just like, yeah, you can just, but in this case, you're dicking around with time with characters and faces that you know, and there's some sort of cut scene plot with the mysterious roped lady being weird and then same as every other thing ever. Yeah. Yeah. New character talking and shit. It's not maxed to the stream of it. I was like, really? Exactly. And then again, max is like the fucking Capcom is Mark ever. It's also funny because like, like this mysterious new roped like person, like in any OG game or whatever would be walking around finding all these characters and basically saying the thing to get them to go into the portal, go to the shadow realm, go to the Netherlands. Hey, Dante, there's pizza in that portal. So yeah,

well, she goes to Rio and is like, you know, the answer that you search is in there. And it's like, oh, is it? Yeah. Well, then I suppose. Yeah, totally. And then like with Dante, she actually shows him she shows him Mundus. Yeah, like doing some shit. And he's like, oh, fuck that. I'm going in. I'm going to punch that guy. Yeah, I don't like him. You know, so just kind of like, just show you whatever you need to see because you're stupid. And then you'll go in. Hey, Chris, like a bottle of Leon's cum is on the other side of that portal. A whole bottle of it. He's already in there. What? Yeah. Yeah, where'd he go? Where'd Chris go? Anyway, I hope to see the return one day of badass Arthur from Ghouls and Ghosts Ghosts and Goblins would be

shocked that he's not in it already because Marvel three had him and that was cool and he got the gold armor and that was cool. And I'm like, yeah, that's fun. That's a really fun Arthur. But does no one remember Cannon Spike? No. In Cannon Spike, he was in a giant Mecha version of that armor and it was sick. Nobody knows about Cannon Spike. It was really, really cool. Well, the only reason I know about Cannon Spike is you telling me about Cannon Spike had some fun designs in it. It had some really fun designs. I believe you. And it had it saved Lynn Kurosawa from the AVP games. That's true. Turning her into a Capcom exclusive character. And then she went on to star in many crossover properties such as Nothing. Yep.

I don't know, man. Get tepid and see what you think. I don't know. I'll probably try tepid. It has characters you care about in it. You're forced to. There's the fact that there's like Monster Hunter, like like Rathalos is a main. It's there's something weird about treating Monster Hunter monsters as characters as characters. Yes. There's the Rathalos. Yeah, there it is. The Monster Hunter. Yeah, there it is. That's weird. Yeah. What else are you going to do? It's like there's no fucking character in it. I mean, they could have picked like, I don't know, one of the NPCs that helps you out because that's a person that's probably in there. There's there's one guy and you know, the dumbass idiot with like the half shaved head is the red

head. The other hunter that's got the cool, the cool handler that meets you on the boat, the guy that's related to the general. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That dude's the young kid, like and you you fucking he that dude know that he's from four. Okay, that's a character. Okay. Oh, and he used to be called the ace cadet and now he's just wait, no, no, no, you're talking about the guy with the big sword that sits there. That's cool. No, no, no, I'm talking about the redheaded kid. Okay, okay, that has the serious handler. Yeah, okay. The first person talks to you on the boat. Yeah, that guy. Yeah. Yeah. Wasn't there but didn't you also tell me that the guy who sits with the big like other long sword? Yeah, that's dude from Monster Hunter too.

Yeah. Yeah. He's a carry. It's a dude from an old game. Yeah. No, I don't mean he's not a character. He's a hunter from Monster Hunter two. Okay. Like he is like, look, hey guys, hey, hey nerds, you guys like Monster Hunter two. You mean the second expedition? Yeah. Alternatively, he could be from Monster Hunter one, depending because the Wrathian armor that he's wearing Wrathian was like the athletic chip added to Monster Hunter freedom, you know, or whatever. It was like Wrathian was the first like new flagship after Rathalos. There's no real like set way to turn a create a character game and hunt generic monster game into a thing where you have a recognize the characters are totally the monsters like that's all you can do. Like people

talk about the hunter. People talk about like funnel fan enough on a fucking Capcom roster like oh, it's got all in it. Yeah, you talk about Monster Hunter game is this fucking is is is Gormagala in it? Pass. Oh, fucking. Oh, man. But yeah, so but but they definitely by seeing that and by what else did I see? I saw another character on the list of shadowy faces that you'll get to control and you think that like they're not just going for like all the flagship poster people, but they're also picking like one or two like weirdos in there. Yeah. So that's cool because that's the main thing as well is like, you know, we talked about how Capcom has such an awesome roster. It's like to capitalize on that fully. You got to go for some of the interesting picks

the predator from aliens. No, not allowed. Okay. Yeah, you don't know that. What I don't get. Well, I don't know why it's called teppen though. Like why is it why is it actually called teppen? Okay, it probably means a word. It probably mean a word. The king of iron foot tournament. Okay, I'm gonna look what's isn't there that MMA and a thing called teppu teppu. Okay, what's teppu? I don't know what teppu. What's teppu? I don't know what it is. I have no idea. Teppen meaning apex. I bet it first. I bet it means something. I bet I bet it's a word. What does it mean? Oh, what is it straight up? What does it mean? Japanese needs top summon summit apex. Okay. And your scalp. So it's a scalp fighter.

Teppen means top. All right, that's all right. Yeah, nothing wrong with that. Nailed it. I did it. I brought meaning to your life. So yeah, I'm looking through the the like playable decks here. And from what I can see, yeah, you got like, Chun Lee, X, Rathalos Ryu, uh, Dante, morrigan, um, Wesker. Yeah. And then Nurgigante. Yeah, Nurgigante is a playable character. Yeah. So yeah, I don't know, man. I saw a lot of people talking like, Oh, I really like his deck because you can shoot the spikes. And am I okay? That appeals to me because I know that monster. But I also saw people that I know, like for a long time posting replays of like them playing

the dragon ball card game. And it just looks like the least interesting. Oh yeah. All these look terrible when you don't know. It just look like the worst. Like it just looks like not the same thing with them. Okay. Oh, I'm drawing. What did I draw? I drew a Broly. Go look at a fucking like somebody's POV raid video. Oh, first world ninja clear on some bullshit. This looks like fucking crap. This is awful. Anyway, so that's tap in, I suppose. Same thing with fighting games. You don't know what's happening. Oh, look at this stupid crap. No, man. This is dumb. Two people punching and kicking. No, man. Same thing with RTS. You don't know what's happening. Oh, look at these dumb units everywhere. That's crappy. Depends

which one. Nah, it's poop. See, see, here's the thing. You're right. But to most people, you're wrong. What game is the hardest to understand just by watching its gameplay? Dwarf Fortress. Yeah, there's no graphics. Oh yeah. Okay. Fortress doesn't have fucking graphics. Remember Homeworld? I think it was called Homeworld. It was like 3D a strat RPG. It was like and the camera would be rotating around a 3D ship battle. I don't know what you're talking about. And I remember just always being like, how do you game? Like I'd be I just always be every time I looked at it, I'm just like, I don't understand where you click. What? What? How? What game? What game do people enjoy that's the shittiest to

watch? Is the real question? Hearthstone? I don't think Hearthstone is fun to watch. The answer is soccer. Take that 95% of the planet. I don't know. You ever watch a game of cricket? They have a flat bat. That's what I know about cricket. Yeah. Then you got to hit the wicket. Yeah, hit the wicket when you play cricket. Cricket's like a joke game made that if cricket wasn't real and somebody told me about cricket, I would think that it is a joke game made to make fun of the English because it's so fucking stupid sounding. You know, you don't pitch the ball. I yeah, it's like it's on like a T or something bowl. You bowl the ball bowl. That's what you got to do. It's got to hit the got to hit the ground first.

I don't know, man. Cricket's dumb. Soccer stupid rugby's cool. Rugby is very cool. I've discovered that when I talk about sports, the more violence is in your sport, the more I enjoy it. The interesting thing about rugby is that people get hurt less because the lack of armor means you're not trying. You're you're you're not trying to push past the armor. You are subconscious. Exactly. You're subconsciously like pulling your hits a little bit to not destroy yourself. But since there's armor there, you like you go all the way. You possibly can. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Rugby's nuts, but it's it's it's interesting. Like you get fucked up in rugby. Yeah, but not as bad in the in the impact. You don't get nearly as much of the brain damage

as you get in the football. You don't get the cat because you don't got that nice armor to bounce your brain around in. Yeah. Also, they do Haka. Yeah, that's awesome. Yeah, they do. What'd you play, man? Let's start from Teppin or do your life. Okay. Well, so aside from from Teppin, did you enjoy any memes this week? I enjoyed. I enjoyed a meme, which we'll come back a little bit later. All right. We'll talk about it. Hey, there was broadcast. It was an enjoyable meme. I did play Blazing Chrome. Okay. I don't know if you heard about that, but I saw a trailer for it and then I like scrolled one scroll and saw you playing it. Yo, do you like Contra? I do. Do you like Super Contra?

Newcastle Super Beast logo. This gang likes Contra. Do you like Hardcore? Yeah. Ah, no. I know. That's the 3D one, right? No. Okay. It's the 2D one with the not main characters in it. That's fine. It's the Contra with the other guys. Shattered Soldier. Yeah, we're not talking about Shattered Soldier. We're not talking about Neo Contra. Talking about the dog. We're not running on the blades. They're running so fast. We're not doing it. We're talking about the 2D run and hold up and shoot. Hold that button and then you shoot it in a circle and jump and flip and pick up the weapon. Yeah, you like that? Is this one of those games? It's like it's not Contra big wink. It is the biggest possible wink. Yeah. Like everything,

every sprite in the game is pretty much like a Contra sprite. It's kind of crazy, but it's original and beautiful and the cutscenes are done amazingly well and they're definitely doing the like the cheating thing where it's like, yeah, this is, that cutscene looked way too good for a Super Nintendo, but it looks amazing. It looks really cool. The characters are all designed really sick. Super Nintendo in your mind. And the fun part about it is that you have two characters, main girl and robot dude, and they do the Contra, and then you unlock Ninja and Punch Girl. Good. And Ninja and Punch Girl, when you use them, it's fucking Strider. Oh, so same stages. But now it's Strider. But now you're Stridering through. And that's awesome. Yeah. And they don't

get different weapon pickups. They get just a slash, a charged slash and like an air dash. That's great. It's really cool. Really, really smart. That seems like it would be really hard to make stages to accommodate both of those. You can and they did. Also they have the ability to flip the stage from right to left and just have you running, running to the left. And that's all. It's really weird to do that. But it's an interesting enough remake. You don't do that. So it has ride armor in it. So it's, you know, like Super C and like Mega Man X and like Metal Slug. There's a bunch of Metal Slug in it as well. You jump in the robot and you walk and do the Mecha thing until it blows up. You jump out. When you up close, you press the shot button, the gun button

to do a melee. Right. You know, so Metal Slug knifing is a thing. Down and jump. Crouching jump is roll. No iframes on it, but it's very fast. Yeah. And yeah, man, just fun bosses, nice like selective use of instead of like the flying weapons that like you pick your, your, you know, your contra gun, instead here you get the option to pick between four different weapon types that are pretty good. They're almost like riding style weapons like the Schmup or a defense shield, speed and double jump or an option that shoots double fire. You got a ton. Okay. You know, really, really fun stuff like that. And yeah, pretty short all in all, but just a clean solid throwback feels really brutal at times. But yeah, everything can be memorized. And thus

the challenge is limited to your ability to pick up the pattern. But I'm bad now. Well, you die and then you get good. Okay. Um, yeah. So beat it. Actually, in that, in that sitting, you know, I played it with Min. It's not main platinum did by now, probably. No, yeah. I mean, he posted on Twitter yesterday. It's like platinum. Oh yeah. That makes it. Yeah. He fucking loves Contra. Yeah. Like, I mean, shit, but that's his jam. Back when we were testing Contra for, like he was the best one in the office at it. You know, so like that makes perfect sense. Uh, not harder than Contra for Contra for still. I never fucking actually beat Contra. Yes. Contra for still the fucking I beat it on easy. And then it told me to get fucked

and to come back and beat the real final. You don't even get to the final level. Yeah. I know I got there. Okay. And that was that. Yeah. No, yeah. Contra is Super Contra for is in fact the tepen to use the word. It's fucked, man. It's kind of nuts. That's such a good game, though. It's very good. The challenges let you unlock the promo tectors. It's good shit. Um, so yeah, I feel like maybe I'd have, I'd have to go back and see, but like playing through the first stage with the striders type characters, like with the punch girl, I feel like it might be more my style. I like getting up close and like not having to think about or get used to like just the bullet nonsense of like friendly fire. Yeah. Oh, there's no friendly fire. But I just mean like in that

initial stage of like what is safe and what is not your brain is not parsing between enemy bullets and your own bullets right away, you know, and sometimes the screen gets full of shit. Yeah. All kinds of nonsense and explosives are happening and you don't know what'll kill you and what won't sometimes, you know, but yeah, it is super worth it. If you have any love in your heart for a contra type game, a blazing chrome is awesome. Great name to very good name. Amazing 80s music and like classic music, 80s theme over the credits as well. Really good. Unfortunately, fucking copyright struck in by a by a YouTube. So they're making that a pain in the ass. Awesome. As is judgment. You see, YouTube's actually got new stuff coming down the pipe. They do

where they just let you cut it out. The coffee and also they had the you have to actually if you do a strike, you actually have to tag the part that's a strike. Yeah, I appreciate that. And I appreciate the ability to cut it. It's going to make for like shittier videos for people to watch at the end of the day. Yeah. But like, but it'll be videos you can make money on. So good fuck. Yeah. And like recently, like almost every week, we've had problems. It's kind of crazy. So between the Jojo video between yeah, um, Mortal Kombat, blazing chrome judgment, like fucking everything I've put up recently has had some shit getting flagged on it and it sucks. So yeah, there's going to be I don't even pay attention anymore. Yeah. I like I get my email

just gets fucking full of like, because I'm putting up like unedited four or five, six hour things. Yeah, I get an email almost every single day. It's like, Hey, we've inappropriate content of whatever. I'm like, Oh, yeah, sure. Fine. Fuck it. Yeah. Fuck it. Fuck you. So that's really annoying. But anyway, blah. So that that was that's blazing chrome. They're also I also had a brief little stint playing some of them racing games that I did those cart racing games that I didn't talk about CTR CTR and TSR TSR CTR trash super racing. So CTR crash team racing. Yeah. That's a fun cart game. Yes. I've heard good things. That's a fun cart game. We're playing the demo with ancient. Same. Same. That's what I

that's the only thing I played. Yeah. And I remember me like this is better than it should be. So I played I played that demo way back and I was like, Oh yeah, that feels like a normal cart ass game. This time around with the newer one, like played that three players in battle mode and racing and whatnot. I'm like, Yeah, this is this is fun. This is fun. The drifting system is takes a minute to get used to because it's different from Mario Kart. In Mario Kart, you know, you just drift and you counter steer the other way and then you go and whatnot. Get you looking for those blue sparks. Yeah. Well, it depends. Right. They changed it all over the time. Okay. Well, you're generally looking for those blue sparks. Then you let it go in your

rocket. Yeah. In this case, you hold one trigger button to jump and start drifting while you counter steer and then a meter fills up. And when that meter fills up, you press the other trigger button to boost. Okay. Yeah, that makes sense. And if you wait too long, you can't boost anymore. Okay. But if you boost properly, you can do it a second time and then a third time. Okay. So it's a different skill, but it's ultimately still a fun thing to do. Lots of bullshit items. Yes. Right. Which is what you're looking for. Yes. And bullshit application of items and whatnot. Yeah, man. Just wacky stupid shit. You know, I had a good time with that. And all in all, like, I feel like I get it. I get what people really like.

This gives her fun about team racing. Blur. No. So blur was really good, but it super got killed by the fact that it wasn't Mario Kart. It was a like driving real ass cars. Yeah. Kartracer. Yeah. And it was really, really fun because it had like need for speed style, like driving physics with kartracer shit. And it was totally, it was a blast. And it came out right next to split second. Yeah. If you remember that one. So split second is the one that I remember and split second is the one that I know. Split seconds. Fucking awesome. Right up until you get about halfway through the campaign. And then it turns to shit. How far did you get in that game? Not that far. Guess what? It has

because you're able to. So racing games have the problem with the fact that you can get out in front of the pack. And then the game stops being fun because there's no racing anymore. You're just rolling around the track. And in split second, you could drop buildings on people. And so is it are you saying that split slash second? Don't forget that's the title. Yeah, split slash second. So the what the end of the computer gets better and then they drop buildings on you and then you can't beat it. No, it's way worse than that. What? Okay, so I dropped 10 buildings on the guy in second. He is over a lap behind. Okay, final lap rubber banding. The I am at top speed with the fastest car in the game. I turn to my rear view and see number two driving more than twice

as fast as the game allows to rocket past me rubber banding sucks. It has the most aggressive rubber banding of any racing game I've ever played on offense and defense. Yeah. And the problem is why the game is easy enough that you never see it on defense. But like the the issue is is that when you hit the final lap, you have to intentionally stay in second or else you can't win. You have to stay in second and then pull ahead in the last like 40% of the track. Yeah, or else the AI will pass you. I never felt I never felt it sucked ass. And that game was so much fun. It's so dumb and so cool. That's a dumb mistake. Yeah, so rubber banding like like I think it was it was for a time when people when we weren't paying attention to that sort of

thing. Yeah, it was easier to deal with when you're dumb, you know, and then it just became more and more obvious. But at the same time, it's like, I don't like Top Gear never did that. Did it? No, I don't think it did. No, Top Gear didn't do it. The realistic racing games didn't do it. Yeah. But here's the thing. And I remember watching like a GDC talk about it. And it basically described the problem that it's like racing games have a very unique problem in that if you do well enough, you essentially stop playing the game. There's no other racers on the track. And you're just doing time trials. Yeah, like you want to you want to have a race. Yeah, but if you're good, yeah, you stop having a race and you start playing a time trial and that sucks. Like

and you have to design around that's why Mario Kart is so popular. Because it's so wacky zany bullshit. Yeah, the blue shell exists to stop that problem. But couldn't the hardest difficulty simply not just be an AI that drives the perfect line? Well, the way Forza did it is the difficulty levels were just they took because Forza was one of those ones like GT where it was like hyper realistic driving model. And so on normal, they just removed certain types of friction from the game. And they removed the way anti lock brakes started your car, you know, stuff like that. And at the high difficulty, the highest difficulty, the drivers, the other drivers still just driving the line and doing well. But now driving itself is really,

really hard. Because driving a car fast is hard. And that was their way around it. Okay. Well, um, yeah, CTR was a ton of fun. Now, when you get into the whole cars that are realistic driving like their kart racing. Team Sonic Racing, TSR. Oh, yeah. That came out. Super Sonic Racing. Heard a lot of good things about all star Sega racing. I heard amazing things about all star. Yeah, like like game changing better than Mario Kart, etc. etc. This is not that it's not that this is not that once you get over the questions as to why Sonic is not on foot. Why Sonic? They answered that. They answered that question. Why is that? So it'd be fair. Yeah. Yeah, that's probably still really boring. It's really stupid for Sonic.

Yeah. Yeah. See, men's explanation was it's because it's driving is like an art and it's the art of the craft of the drive that. Well, we live in a world in which Mario and Sonic at the Olympic Games had a part of its trailer going, you'll finally find out who's Sonic or Mario. Yeah, yeah, exactly. And you're like, go fuck yourselves. Anyway, it should have been Sonic's the fastest that Mario crushes the high jump done. So we get this game where Sonic's driving a car and it just feels bad. Like the moment the car starts moving, I thought it was just my character and then play this immediately. Immediately afterwards. Oh, that's a great. And I thought at first, I thought it was just my character. And then it's like, no, it wasn't just my character.

All of the cars just feel like they're kind of sliding around driving model just sucks. Yeah. Yeah. And it feel and here's the thing is it's the kind of slip and sliding you would want out of a wipeout and or F zero game. I know, but really that much. But in this case, it's just bad because you're on a car with wheels and it's really that much slide. You're you're fucking you're you're what do you want to call it? Like you're it's like you're doing laps on an ice hockey table. That sounds like shit. It really was not really bad driving model. Then you take the part where like they throw in these items that you're supposed to use to fuck with everyone while you're racing and whatever. But there's really only like four of them. There is the boost.

There's a shot. Yeah. And then there's like a leave a thing behind you. And then some mushroom red shell is a mushroom green shell banana. And I don't even remember what the four very memorable. Like they're like you just there was just nothing going on with it. Plus they were so far apart that you had to mostly win by doing the slidey shitty fucking at which point. What's the point of having to be a car racer? You know, and it just it was really not good. Um, I don't know, man. Another one of the sonic pile. It didn't know whether it wanted to be a car racer or like a not a driving simulator, but a proper driving game. And so it just did this kind of both thing. But then it also has stunts

while you're jumping. And it just it just feels like a mistake. Hey, I have a stupid question because something that's almost never come up on the entire history of us working in this business is that I used to love racing games. But racing games have been shit for so long. Like the last racing game that I loved was Burnout Paradise. Yeah. Is there a good racing game that exists now? Probably a few. But uh, I used to like racing games as long as I was playing them locally with somebody. Yeah. And that was not fun online. I've never had fun playing in a race game online once. I remember having a lot of fun testing. Um, not what not you said not blur, but it's a name like blur dirt. One word dirt.

You dirt is responsible for my all time favorite description you ever gave me about the optimal experience. Do you remember it? What was it? It was you tried to play dirt and it didn't it didn't grab you. But it was it was at work and they gave you like a air conditioned separate room to play dirt and you were feeling good and you walked in with like a morning coffee. Yeah. And no one was going to bother you all day. You sat in this perfect room to play dirt by yourself in the ideal scenario. And it did literally nothing for you at all. I still enjoyed the experience. No, we didn't know. So there it wasn't exactly that. It was a it was 100 player test. I wasn't alone. I was with a bunch of people. It was at the crack of dawn. It was

early and I had my coffee. My memory of this story clearly sucks. Yeah. And like the best guy in the office brought his steering wheel and fucking went in on it and he just drove the perfect line the whole time. And I remember being like, man, this game is really cool. I'm not good at these. Yeah. But it tapped into because here's what here's my problem with racing games. I would say I like racing games, but the truth is I like top gear. And the more something reminds me of top gear, that's all I'm looking for. I used to say that I really loved Need for Speed. Yeah. And I know I'm going to date myself as really old, but Need for Speed three and four are incredible racing games. Yeah. But those are PS one games. There's there's games that are basically like

they represent the extreme version of a type like and I like those. So me saying I like a racing game in general, it's more like, nah, it's a little disingenuous. I like top gear and top gear type games. I like Wipeout and F zero GX. And what I played a lot of Mario Kart, you know, reminds me of it reminds me of burnout three and me and Liam did a fucking one off to just fucking fill time on the whole channel of Drive Club. And we're like, ah, fuck it, little drive club. Why not? Yeah. And it has like the least enjoyable driving model of any game I've ever played in which it's it's like it wants you to go really fast and it's like realistic looking, but it's all it doesn't control realistically, but they added like you have to drive in a way

like, oh, make sure to cut your corners. Like it's a realistic game, but it doesn't fit. And it's like it is splitting the difference of all of the different driving types in the worst possible way. That game fuck that all the bruja about that game was always followed up with like, oh, by the way, that game sucks. Also, it's bad to play. I had to test Burnout Paradise for a little bit. Oh, that's good. And good for you. It was wait, was it? No, it wasn't Burnout Paradise. No, no, no, no, no, it wasn't Burnout Paradise. It was another game with a franchise that made its first open world driving debut. Need for Speed? What was it called though? Need for Speed? There's a bunch of them now. Okay, there was the first open world. It might have been either the

first open world Need for Speed or something. But like, I remember, I remember just like playing it and going like yikes, I don't like this. I just want tracks. I played one of those people were saying Need for Speed, whatever, whatever was really good. And I played it. I'm like, this doesn't fit. This is really stupid because I'm like a decade behind like this doesn't feel like a Need for Speed game. The funny thing is back in the day, I remember playing Most Wanted, I think two on PC and being like, oh man, playing as a cop is super cool. That game's the ship. Right? It's the last good Need for Speed game. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Where I'm like, you like, yeah, the whole chasing down dudes and whatever and pulling them over. That was that was like a fun

new mechanic. Yeah, kind of thing. And then it's hard. And then at some point, they just started naming them Most Wanted again. I think there's a there's a there's a modern ish one for the 360 PS3 called Most Wanted. That one is good because it's a burnout game. Okay, it is made by a ghost games ghost something. It's made by like 60% burnout people. It's literally just burnout. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That one's good. And then criterion died. And I think ghost games died. And now they put out a Need for Speed. Hot Pursuit. That's it. Hot Pursuit. Hot Pursuit. Yeah. Yeah. Yep. Yep. Yep. Yep. I remember now. Is there a good racing game that exists now? Oh, surely. For sure. They're going to they'll find it. Someone tell me because I suddenly

I want to drive a cargo fast. Yeah. I mean, there was what what did I like? I mean, it got rip rest and rip drift stage. Yeah, what's going on with that? It's canceled. Is it? Yeah. Is it? Yeah. When did that indefinitely on hold? Why is that? I'm not sure. But um, artists said that like, programmer put it on hold. Can I get my $500 back, please? I'm not the person who can answer that question. Can you direct me to the person who can answer that question? I think I can. Thank you. I'd appreciate that. I like that sweater. And I have a shirt. That record right there. That vinyl right there is a pretty cool vinyl. It's cool that that came out. That's sad. All these drift stage clones now coming in and just like taking and coming out,

coming out. Yeah. Coming along and filling the void. So here's the thing. Even if there are some projects that fail, not due to anyone's malice, but just because the shit falls apart, this feels this fills my heart with like darkness when I think about crowdfunding. It fills my heart with especially like, I was really looking forward to that game. Ghost songs apparently still under active development. Yeah, I heard there was an update like a couple of months ago. I feel like my success rate for Kickstarter is 50 50. I feel not just going back like I would see a bunch of drift stage like games coming out and launching and whatnot. And I'd always just be like, Oh man, wait, that's cool. Still waiting for

drift. They're going to crush you guys. These guys don't stand a chance every time, every time it happened like four times, you know, anyway, anyway, yeah, there's I played that. There's that one cool racing game that I played at packs earlier. What was it called? Was it grip? Was it grip? No, I don't remember. It might have been grip. It was cool. Yeah, it was cool. I mean, grit. No, it wasn't grit. Gurt, I think it was I think it was grip. And, you know, there's also what was there? Grid. Grid, that's a racing game. You're probably thinking of grid. Probably grid. Yeah, could be. And then I want to say there was something else that caught my eye recently, but I don't remember what it was. Anyway, that's cool. I don't

like Trackmania, but I will give Trackmania thumbs up for pushing VR to the fucking limit. Distance was sick, even though that's not a racing game. It's not a racing game. You race a car in it. Yeah, it's not a racing game. Distance is super cool, but it's not a racing game. Definitely. Yeah. Oh, well, maybe one day we'll get Captain Falcon again. Can I buy Ford's Horizon 2 on Steam yet? There's the VR game, the PSVR one. Whatever. Remember when everyone was like, man, VR is really taking off this time. And then all the companies making VR are like, oh, wait, no, not this time, actually. And had its moment. Yeah. There was a bigger moment than it ever had before. Yeah. And it will, I feel convinced that it's

like until it's a pair of glasses. Yeah. But even then, people don't always want to deal with the stress on their eyes. It'll be an occasional thing. My issue with, I mean, I've said before, but with PSVR is I never got it. Like I played it at the office and it was a blast, right? Yeah. And then I could never get it properly set up in my own house once. And even though you remember my old apartment, it had like, I had a big square to use for it. It would always drift to one direction. So I never even bothered setting it up in my current place. Oh yeah, fast racing, you know, fast RMX. Man, you want to talk racing games, sit down and talk to men about initial D and more specifically, Wang in midnight someday. Hey, you know what? I don't want to do

that. He has. I really don't. That seems like an awful time. He has things to say. That's not interesting, though. And I will say that I do like the very versus style arcade system of like the one on one racing games that like you get your card and then challenge people and shit. That stuff was pretty, pretty sick. I like the the directness of that. Anyway, let's take a quick word from our sponsors. Let's do that, please. This week, Castle Super Beast is sponsored by DoorDash. Hey, DoorDash, what's up? I'm actually starving right now. Well, well, I too am hungry. I'm going to have to wait because I'm currently podcasting, but you listener do not have to wait. You don't have to wait because DoorDash

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a shout outs to Stitch Fix. Stitch Fix. Stitch Fix. I like this kind of service. Okay. This sounds like my kind of service. Is this what I think it is? If you could describe your look in one word, what would you, what would it be? Tired. Yeah. That's fine. You know, casual, sophisticated, playful. I don't know. Um, guy with gamer shirt. That works too. But you know, the job got the girl don't need to try as hard. There is that possibility. That's my look. But she gotta sometimes, you know, I like, I like to switch it up. Sometimes I feel afro punk. Yeah. Sometimes I feel blipster. Most of the time I feel like guy with gamer shirt. And yeah, I like to have fun with the outfits. So Stitch Fix is basically coming along to help you with a personal

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All right. Noose. All right. I don't know what you got and what list, but I know exactly what news that I want to talk about first, which is a phrase from you all directly quote, woolly, what the fuck is wrong with KFC? You must have caught wind at some point. As to what? Oh, totally. But before that was the fucking, did you see the key the KFC Cheetos commercials? No, I didn't have to look at it. It's filled with co branded flavor. Oh, watch it. No, it's got actual Cheetos dust in a fucking KFC sandwich. Right now, we're going to go around the world to the far, far distant lands of China. Hey, China, what's up over in China? Chinese FF 14 players are eating inhuman piles of KFC to earn fat chocobos. Yes,

byline winner winner chicken dinner. So the fat black chocobo mount. So okay, there's a black, there's a fat chocobo mount. Can you do me a favor? What's that? Can you see that ball with the string attached to it? Just grab the bottom one, the bottom one and just lift it up. There you go. You almost got it worked. There you go. All right. All right. So the fat chocobo was like a pre order bonus or collector's edition shit or whatever. And then the white fat chocobo you could get from some ancient Amazon promotion here, but it was a 7 11 promotion in Japan. And then the black fat chocobo was another Amazon promotion. I'll pretty much everywhere, except Canada, which is why I had to buy something off Amazon.us to get them out. But in China,

they have decided to have a way more fun approach to it. Fun. Yes. So fun. So every country gets to determine how to give people their black chocobo. It appears to be that black chocobo. That's correct. Have you seen it? It's really fat. It's a chunk. Yeah, that's a that's a chunk. Do you know how it flies? You hold a cake in front of its face. Oh, yeah. And it flies very, very big chungus. Well, as it turns out, okay, I'll just, I'll just give it, I'll just read this directly as it's explained here. But the way this works is you have to buy a family deal for four, then eat the whole family deal for four. It's only available if you dine in. And apparently they do enforce the rule that you have to finish the best part. That's absolutely the best before they hand you

the code. Here's what's in the meal. One double chicken burger, one vegan mushroom burger, one five piece chicken nuggets already to probably original recipe chicken, one two piece New Orleans chicken wings, one old Beijing spicy duck roll, two large pepsis and two peach oolong teas large. Okay, so I so I've been reading up on this. Wait, there's more. I'm not done. There's more. That's a lot, right? But here's the thing with that list. That's per person. So you actually get four times what I just read out. That's so much more. That's really person gets two burgers, one double chicken and one vegan mushroom and four drinks, two large pepsis and two large peach oolong teas and the chicken pieces,

duck roll and the nuggets. So that's four times that amount of chicken burgers or whatever the fun like that's a lot. The picture is stupid. Yeah, I've seen it. I've seen it. It is a stupid picture. By the way, you know what that image is? That's the fucking raid font. Oh, really? That's a that's a goofy image somebody made that is essentially that probably says KFC chicken extreme on it. I mean, this is the single dumbest promotion. Let's break down the dumbest part. Drink eight pepsis in a sitting at like alone and we're gonna and we're gonna sit and watch you do it to verify that you've done it before we even think about handing the code over. Um, yeah. So so this then, of course, leads to some dedicated people. Yeah,

that want their fat fucking chocobos. Yeah. And God bless they've attempted it. Some people actually got it solo. Yeah. And everyone has been writing in MMO speak about how to approach it. So it's tough to tank those those vegan burgers, man. WHM was wiped following was wiped first followed by the tank. RDM resurrected WHM, but he denied now only BLM is still alive. We're about to be wiped. By the way, RDM says that I'm the toughest in my party. So now all the food is on my plate. I cheated and I said I would solo, but after I wiped after eating a roll, a chicken and two wings, I'm done. What about you? Uh, our team was wiped, failed to pull the roll and burger apart during the party during part two empty pulled two burgers. Just leave the coke alone, focus on the

chicken. Uh, bad. Anyone at Cooming want to team up for a raid already found three wiped at 5% solo. You must distribute the damage from the Pepsi. Don't let it stack. Can't just drink eight Pepsi's in one go. You got it. You got to break it down. And then the last was a three part message from somebody who said I went to the toilet. They took away my meal and gave me a new one. There's something about they will not let you go. There's something about a promotion being so lucrative to bring people in that you'll throw like $40 of food in the trash and make a new batch just to fuck with people like literally, literally. Oh, you thought the

bathroom would help you. You thought you could sneak away. They emptied his fucking table and brought him a new set, dude. They're throwing chicken at you. That's what's known as resetting the aggro table. Is that when you leave the instance and no, it's occasionally when a boss like moves away into a phase change, they'll come back and they'll come back with a clean aggro table. So you have to reestablish hate. Oh my God. Yeah. I don't know what China is thinking. Like I don't get it. How this is legal because like we've had. I just called you Paige. Well, everything is legal in China and nothing is legal in China. Don't worry about it. But like the absolute hatred and disdain for everyone that wants to show you fucking freaks. They

fucking hate you. They hate your existence and they sit and watch you hate yourself to get the fat chocobo. And of course, it's a fat chocobo, you know, like, there's yeah, that's it's it's I've never heard of anything like it. I mean, ever since like fucking to rock tattoo and shadow man babies, like blood vertizing, this is a new this is absolutely right up there because this is lethal amounts of food. It's it's you got to get fucking Kobayashi to come help you out on this shit. Like it's like stupid heart attack grill shit, but they're throwing it at Chinese people. It's not like Americans where there's like a culture of like feed yourself until you're dead, right? Like take your chicken burger, dip it in water so that it

goes down easier. Work on the next I would think that that would the water would build up over a time and fill up stomach space probably. But in terms of swallowing, you don't want to swallow it, you just want to get it right down the gullet sleeve. And that makes it not get trapped inside because the moment you have to stop and feel it going down. That's a problem. You need it to just grease all the way through. This description is not good to hear. How much do you want that fat chocobo? I bought a time card off Amazon dot us. If you're in that's how much I want if you're in a different region, like it'll still work. The American code works for my Canadian account. But the Chinese version of that game is completely separate from everybody else's. So sorry, guys.

So in other words, if you see somebody on a Chinese server with a fat black chocobo, you know, they're cool slash they might be. They know they're cool. They might be dying. They might have taken the code off their dead friend's body. They might need help. Yeah. Report it immediately. Yeah. If you see anyone with one. Yeah, that's that's our fucking gem. That's our just good. All right. Co branded flavor, Willie. Well, anyway, speaking of starting from scratch when you go to the bathroom, oh boy. Why'd you go to the bathroom is because you keep shitting yourself in public in front of everyone. Famitsu recently did a interview with Game Freak to talk about what happened.

Oh, so the update this week to the Pokemon Sword and Shield story didn't think we'd be doing a reset the clock series on fucking Pokemon. But here we are. It's so stupid. It's a very simple update this time around. And I do I actually am seeing online that there is a like it's becoming the discussion of like don't tell developers that like don't call developers lazy because making a game is fucking hard. I don't call any developers lazy. I prefer to call them incompetent. I'm not even that's not even where I'm going. I'm just saying the main thing is to me, the main thing is just just take more time. Just I it's understandable that it was not ideal, but take the time you need to make it better. They are they are

100% allowed not to take more time. Well, I couldn't have said that in a worse way. Can I try that again? You they're absolutely not allowed to take more time by who them? No, they're they're corporate masters that then they should give them more time. They're like whatever the product needs, whoever you want to point it at, whether it's developer or corporate master, people in charge of making the game happen. Who cares if it's good? It'll sell. So anyway, Pokemon. Here's what we got. We got someone who translated a Famitsu interview and basically posted it on Reddit. And the update to the story is that it's a little bit more complicated than it seemed because the assumption that we were taking already we're taking assets from 3ds and porting them over

and just using them as is why they made those 3ds 3ds assets the way they did is not exactly what happened. When they switched over from 3ds to Nintendo switch, the frame rates and quality were both different. In this article, they revealed that they went to transfer the models and move animations into SS sword and shield. But they didn't transfer overwrite forcing them to rebuild from scratch, keeping keeping in mind that Game Freak only has 143 employees, only half of which are working on Pokemon, the other half on town. So basically, while the same animations of the Pokemon themselves are copied and pasted, most if not all the Pokemon models had to be redone. On top of that issue, Dynamaxing forces Game Freak to produce extra models for each and every

Pokemon because you know it doesn't because you cannot just take the same model and increase its size by 10 and expect it to look half decent. So this is where a lot of the so I'm feeling some of the animosity that I'm sure longtime Pokemon fans are feeling because okay, we get to do two things here. We need to choose. Alright, so hold on a second. That's being called a mistranslation. So the there's an update to update the update the update on the post. The person is who translated this or people are saying was mistranslated. What are they saying here? Didn't think this would reach so many people. The best way to explain all the questions is with full explanation. Everything stated in the articles from my own words. So let's focus on the intro paragraph of my own.

The whole reason I researched the topic in the first place was listening to an episode of comic book or comms Pokemon on podcast. But most of the information from my paragraph was lifted from that, including the mention of frame rates and quality, the line about starting from scratch and about Dynamax models. Also, Game Freak has gone on record saying that they have two development teams team a is town team these Pokemon. Obviously, no one really knows that if this is true until we have the game in our hands and search the game files. So that's the update that the first thing that I read out, we get to have two feelings here either. Did they really fuck up the transfer process? The whole reason they made those things

the whole reason that you got shitty frame rates on the 3ds so they could have high quality models that would work for the future didn't work. So that was all for nothing. And now you're remaking the models to look like a 3ds game with all the anime like the stupid animations like if you're going to remake every fucking Pokemon and keep it to a list of what 250 whatever the fuck. Why are you remaking it in the style of the limited looking bad ones that you made so that like like that part just blow like so I'm looking at a different article here over on Nintendo everything calm and again if people if you guys are saying that there's a more accurate translation of this

article then send it my way I'm only following what I was what I read here but this has a bullet point list of some of the points from the article and yeah it's it's it seems to pretty much summarize the same thing with the shift to switch the amount of time needed to make the graphics more beautiful animations was increased series series reached over a thousand Pokemon because of this apart from the graphics balancing new Pokemon with abilities became very hard the reason behind the decision was time they judged it will be hard for all the Pokemon to appear even in titles going forward this was a decision that had to be made sooner or later sun and moon bringing in every Pokemon was something barely manageable sword and shield needs needed to redo the models they had

to make a decision the wild areas in the story have quite a bit of content to make up for it whether or not they'll be adding new Pokemon in future releases is currently uncertain and then there's a couple of other points that go down this list but the point the part that I get stuck on is that the either the this development team is profoundly incompetent or some of those things are lies you did not need to remake every single asset there are other Pokemon games on the third there's another Pokemon game on the on the switch that people have been able to determine has the models ported over they're the same models also I don't if you remember but when Pokemon Sun and Moon came out people threw that shit into Citra and kicked it the the

fucking resolution up those models look great there's no need to like it's it's so stupid this is so fucking stupid also no one asked for Dynamax so saying like well you know we have to redo it for Dynamax we got to make a new model for every single Dynamax Pokemon because like you know you can't just then take that out do you really think anyone in the world is saying oh yeah I would much rather have Dynamax than 400 extra Pokemon um I'm gonna I'm gonna stand by what I was saying in that I think the solution to almost any possible issue here is just time also like literally like whatever the problem is or could be that's okay just take the time to do it right also the other thing I don't know what to deal with the their team size is

like Pokemon should have like like I'm not I'm not advocating for like factory farm game making but like Pokemon's a way fucking bigger deal than Assassin's Creed Assassin's Creed gets 1200 developers from 95 different countries and nobody wants crunch right but how come Pokemon has to have 80 people and that's like a development team of like 10 years ago so this brings me to the image that I got sent that I thought was pretty pretty funny and you know someone out there who's much more informed can probably correct if there's any mistakes on this thing but I'm gonna pull it up anyway because if this is true this is kind of insane and it's Pokemon versus Digimon right oh yeah no I've seen have you seen this yeah okay so this one in particular

is wild because it just goes on a point by point basis and it shows you examples of characters in game models so they're comparing it's an image macro here and it's not macro it's an image and it's comparing Pokemon Sword and Shield with the second most recent Digimon game Cyber Sleuth in order to give Pokemon I played that game for a bit it's impressive this is to give Pokemon a handicap since this is their first console title right um I guess not counting the fucking stadium yeah whatever and so on and Coliseum but Cyber Sleuth was originally on Vita and then poured it to PS4 yeah so they have side-by-side examples it looks great yeah in-game characters monsters environments battle UI looks overall way way way better in Digimon way better a whole generation

ahead right um Pokemon has 800 individual models all of which are already completed and animated since gen 6 game freak was unable to port these over as they did in the previous game and they cut Pokemon from the game completely and they intend to continue this for all future games whereas Sleuth has 249 individual Pokemon all sorry Digimon all the models and animations were made from scratch the sequel increased it to 341 the director wants to add more and include and much more obscure ones then in terms of notable differences on the other side of the screen here you got Pokemon don't follow you in the overworld whereas in Digimon all three of your part Pokemon in your party follow you you've got um uh gen 8 badges beat the evil team catch the legendary

beat the champion whereas in Cyber Sleuth there's a story that involves many mature themes that doesn't hold your hand is i'm gonna take that yeah images word for it i don't fucking know uh all attack animations in our universal z moves have been removed versus in Digimon have their own fully animated signature moves in each one has at least one and then your rival starts the game with a starter weaker than yours and your rival starts the game with a giant fucking mech thing in so in conclusion it says at the bottom i actually think the better uh comparison is one that you made i think uh two weeks ago was to monster hunter sure sure monster hunter got up to so an individual monster and monster hunter is a million times more work than an individual

pokemon right they have huge animation sets they have skeletons etc right but we hit world and we went from 110 plus down to 35 right but you could see why Rathalos looks fucking sick and he has all of his shitty animations got cleaned up you got a batch of new particle effects it looks good you know all that stuff right yep iceborn's gonna come out it looks like they're gonna kick it up to 50 55 right monster hunter world two or whatever the fuck it's called is probably gonna kick it up to 77 and then monster hunter world two frontier gx is probably gonna kick it up to 95 because capcom is throwing the resources that it demands behind it and they're hauling ass to get these things out they never ever in that whole series ever said something so stupid as you're probably

never gonna get that high of a roster again with gu generation's ultimate they said this is going to be the largest roster for a while because we're literally just grab there they were just drag dropping shit over from other games right yeah but the first thing they said when world came out is we know the monster list is small we are busting our asses to get as many of your favorite monsters in as fast as possible they didn't go out and say well it's hard so you'll probably never see a big roster again so the the in conclusion on this image says in conclusion gamefreak can't manage to port over assets they've been using for six years despite having enough funding to buy new york while the franchise that makes nearly 200 times less money managed to outperform the

in every aspect on evita it's it's it's it's laugh it's a joke like they the the development team and when i say development i'm going to point at the technical team at gamefreak have got to sit on their asses for decades making ds games and not learn how to develop big boy big budget games and now that they're being asked to make one they are making a handheld game and if this was a handheld game they would still be fucking it up that's the thing like they would not even a console release yeah that's that is that is the truth um yeah again i'm not even that i'm not even gonna come at them that hard about the development like hurdles yeah because the model animation shit like when i look at it and i see the little dog wag wagging you're like how did you put that

yeah that looks really that's embarrassing that looks really bad i would be i would feel bad to put that out but even even at that level i'm like i would much rather stay safe and just go like no look i i all i'm gonna say is whatever the fuck got you to this point this is the point where you go it's not done put it back in and you make that you make that call whether it's the starcraft ghost call yeah or the metroid dread call yeah right uh the tetra's trackers call whatever the fuck you want it to be you make that call where you just go you know what no no no no no no no this is the first proper like well it's not it's still a half handheld half console whatever the first big new i i can i can some console release dilemma up in like one sentence just give it more time what are

you actually getting from this other than some extra lines of resolution i believe it is the new type of map right like the way you the way the camera works outside of fights pretty much right i believe that also new waifus whatever they would have had new waifus if it was a fucking gameboy game you seen those abs yeah i seen them but like i believe that is the only significant technical feature being added and it as a result seven more like 70 percent of a roster's of a roster games roster is being junked so that you can move like oh it's so it's so stupid it's so stupid so now best case scenario uh they because it's too they're not gonna like it's it's happening right how many characters did marvel infinite launch with yeah i know i know but seriously how many

they launched with like 40 uh no no way less than that it was it was two rows uh on each side and each row had maybe like one two three four five six seven uh 14 maybe 28 you know what i'm saying 30 28 i was 28 30 yeah yeah that's that was dumb it what it didn't even launch with as many characters as like the earlier first batch and it was fucking stupid this is twice as stupid as that yeah so this is too late to pull back well it's never to me it's never too late to pull it back and fix it but i'm not but you're not the person i'm not the producer i'm not i'm not right but now what you have is at worst a sorry at best a no man sky scenario where it launches and the people that like it get it and

play it and it's fine but everyone who's upset by it sits by idly and waits and then hopefully big updates come to fix it later on that address what people want to see but the amount of work going into that it's almost like you already launched this this all comes back like all the anger comes back that's gonna fucking hurt you one sentence which i feel like sums it all up which is which they need to roll back they need to come back and then they have doubled down on it and they go you're probably never gonna see another pokemon game with all the pokemon again that's the part if they said listen we're running behind we're putting in these 350 we're gonna add like a hundred and six months and then the next batch will have to you know whatever right

we'd still be mocking them like ruthlessly because the animations are fucking dumb but people go well they fucked up they're gonna put them in whatever right but the phrase of like well no we'll never be able to work hard enough or smart enough to get them all in there so my friend my friends that have been uh super into pokemon in the past whenever there's been stuff that they're bothered by it always seemed really granular yeah it always and it was always like a change this mini game with the bike and it was and it was yeah and i've always definitely been like okay you know whatever poke nerd if you're in there you're in there i suppose right this is the first time that it's actually like a very broad and clear botch um and it's weird because i'm so i'm so used to pokemon

being like it's fucking pokemon it's fine like you know do you know why you felt that way because deep in the seat of your mind you're like ah it's fucking pokemon you do all the all your favorites are here i remember pokemon i remember i like i like chancey or whatever the fuck anyway and and and uh you know they got them all in oh there's there's some new ones that'll be worth it right yeah there's nothing time can't fix man nothing time can't fix death what uh well hey maybe by the time things are good um this will be be a game that you can play on your new screen yes big why the fuck isn't it working what are you trying to do here you're trying to load an

article the article just doesn't work it's like all the switchlight they pulled it uh they pulled the article why they do that i don't know that that product still exists yeah okay well the switch light got announced yeah i'm trying to find i i want to i want to say that everybody knew this was going to happen ever this is the most obvious thing ever yeah it's a smaller one it's about half a small so it's easier to put in your pocket or your jacket pocket really um the cool there we go um the switch light is a smaller switch with no joy cons yep it has a real d-pad real d-pad it's kind of infuriating actually well what are you gonna do because but without joy cons with

real d-pads well without without joy cons that there's no reason for the button d-pad because you're never going to play with a second person and that that then needs the same control layout as you actually you will so if you want to play those games you have to bring out multiple extra bonus joy cons to sync up to this the switch light sure which is fucking stupid but that's why they can they put the d-pad here it's because they don't have to make those joy cons yeah put out a fucking joy con with the d-pad guys yeah well um don't like the fact that it's an unofficial one it's like it's it's there but you can't use it as a joy con now that they fix it uh but yeah it is a smaller version that has that and uh no doc no doc for uh 199 us i was talking a page about this

and she pointed out something that i didn't quite realize that the title of the console is now a lie yeah it is because you can't switch yes it's not a switch light it's a it's a it's a it's a big three yes it is a not switch it's not a switch no switching that whole click thing yeah that entire click mechanic is they use that sound effect constantly in that promo that's not a rid the joy cons don't do it the fucking thing that yeah and so yes it's a 40s thank you somebody said that in chat nintendo 40s nintendo vita yeah there's no yes that's actually totally one of it no hdmi the unswitchable um this seems like a bad one to get i don't know i bought a dude i bought a 2ds for stuff and it was handy but the 2ds is better than 3ds i mean it was it was handy and it was

cheaper you know in this case this is you it's $50 cheaper but you lose like a bunch i'll like a ton of but if you didn't need those or want those things it's not a big deal like i don't i don't see this is that bad i see this is fine like i see is a bad value if you but if you still want the original value with the dock do you just get the normal switch like this is quite this is quite simply do you have a kid that wants a portable system just a portable system and doesn't need or want any of that other shit yeah you give me your old phone well you give me to give them a switch like you fuck you fuck you fuck you you don't do that you don't you don't lose them you don't lose them we got to keep those we need them we need those kids yeah you need those kids

like console games yeah so um so you trick them with a real switch and i'm sure this still you know you still can exactly like we'll get a pro controller and fucking use it if you need to or whatever this will not support that i'm wireless connection wireless controller connections peripherals this is stupid then then just get the regular switch again can this thing even stand up on its own it probably has the little backstand i wouldn't be surprised but dude it's again it's not for you then but it's but its existence makes sense here's the thing if this was if this was the portable no dock all right so it doesn't stand that this was the portable we you i'd agree with you but the switch is already for everyone this is for people that want to spend less money

that don't want to hook it up to an hdmi or have detachable joy cons yeah and if you're someone that doesn't care about those features and is willing to spend less on it okay so then you get a d-pad out of the i would like to point out to you woolly that if those people who buy it's a handheld if you want to buy the switch light and play one of the games that needs detachable joy well that's not wait let me finish if you need to if you want to buy the switch light and buy a goddamn game that has detachable joy con support and actually use that because joy cons cost like a hundred dollars and you don't get them in the thing it actually costs fifty dollars more than the switch if you happen to be one of those people yeah if you want to

actually be able to play every game on the library find yourself in that circumstance that's true it's a fucking rip not if you don't care about those games no i mean it's literally a rip like you're getting less and for more okay take okay woolly think about it this way take the joy cons off a switch right now the switch costs a hundred and seventy dollars right there are no joy cons on the switch light but it costs two hundred that means it's a rip off but what's the part where you're ignoring the detail that you don't that not everyone has to play is cares about playing those games the games that support it it doesn't work for you it might work for people that don't care about those games they're they're putting out a cheap light this is cheaper to

make them the switch for sure right mm-hmm they're probably making more money off of it than they are off the switch we don't know i probably yes that's a rip off well i don't see how it's a rip off because it's a worse product for comparatively more money okay you're doing it is it is worse than the difference in price if this was a hundred so you're saying it should be cheaper yeah it should be a 150 or whatever price point sure okay i'm not gonna argue that like if you whatever the price point should be or could be to make it easier for people to buy it in places where they can afford a normal switch sure woolly there is no scenario ever in which someone can't afford a normal switch but can afford this and ever a game or or would want to get like i i definitely could a kid picture

like someone wanting to buy this for a kid as opposed to a normal switch but uh the regular switch is 300 bucks not 250 i thought was 250 well so this is the type of thing that like with the person in mind if the person in mind is going to play a limited selection of games slash a specific certain selection of games that are not the ones where they'd be affected by owning this and they're never going to be plugging it into the hdmi because it's a child yeah this is more than fine this is totally a plausible situation that you a plausible option for them and they get a d-pad out of it makes perfect sense to me i want to point out that when people say i bought four of them one was a present for a nephew so that he would have a good call i would never have bought this

for that's cool and two where i just bought them for i physically bought them for people but they paid me back uh let's see so the switchlight will not have a kickstand um it has a normal d-pad no way to no tv out um is it but it's still a touchpad right and it's yeah it would have to be it would still have a bunch of shit would work if it did yeah um better battery life i wish they would have put of like a it next to a regular switch in the video they put out uh so better better battery life uh three to seven instead of the uh 2.5 to 6.5 um i would and i'm not sure if the i'd have to see it in my palm to see like how exactly how much bigger yeah so i mean i wish they had like literally had them like a person hold up them next to each other because it would be but if this was like if

the difference in size made this just enough to be like pocketable that'd be cool yeah you know the the other problem is like a lot of games run really badly in on dock mode a bunch of run well but a bunch are like and and that's going to be this thing's default state yeah yeah i don't know man i could i could i could definitely consider uh depending on how good that d-pad is i could see situations where i'm like yeah fuck it i want to put my cartridge in this and play it on that cartridge if i if i were to buy a physical or far well i'm sorry my memory memory um the memory stick that has your games on it because you can put it on the memory on the game on the actual thing or you can put on the memory stick put your games on a memory stick

okay your digital games that you purchased from the e-shop sure yes so you can then bring them from one to the other i think i put one of those in there once okay and to make that problem go away okay well i have an sd card in my console and that's what they're called yes yeah i put one of those in there yeah so to make the problem go away yeah and so this would be a really easy way to just bring the bring the games that you want onto i bet if you transfer that sd card none of that should work if you log into your nintendo account and it's and prove that you're the same person i hope it would but nintendo yeah but now there's an account remember remember we use save games yeah i do i this is now there's an account system

there's no reason for that to be a problem yeah we'll find out won't we though i have a reason nintendo yeah remember hook your phone up to your microphone up to your bullshit i imagine at worst you'll put bring the games over and then when you're logged into your account you'll have to redownload your uploaded saves from from um the cloud manually if you can't bring them over on the sd card it's just not gonna work at all i'm telling you right now you know what no someone can answer this with two switches with two switches yeah right now so if you if i pull my sd card out and put it into a new brand new switch and log into that does that work or does it not work i'm it might just have the games without the saves but the saves are cloud backed up and when you log into

your account you can download your saves so in theory i imagine it would work that way if it doesn't that sucks but yeah yes it works it works yeah your cloud let's say no it doesn't work your cloud lets you your cloud let's let's you access your saves i don't see why switching consoles wouldn't let you access your cloud anyway um we're saying it doesn't work okay i can't well you can't let's let go yes no yes yes no fuck that guy he's an asshole shut up totally works i did it right now yeah anyway so that's that switch light cheaper shittier but not problem but not so shitty that you know it might not be worth it for you depending on whether you want that i don't know i don't think it's that big a deal it's kind of bums me out

because like the two ds and the two ds xl were improvements on the three ds so i hate it i hated the uh the ds light i hated it what because uh no sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry not the ds light um what was the uh the greatest handheld ever exists sorry sp gba sp gba sp i hated the gba sp that's because of the lack the headphone jack no it was outrageous no that was stupid but that was not my problem with it yeah my problem was that i couldn't hold it yeah because you have big hands and it's it's super tiny yes it was awful that was that sucked the dsi came along and that was great because it smoothed the s out that whole thing dsi is a completely different a dead ds later then the camera with all that weird shit but dsi was also not it was in the

style of a ds light yeah it wasn't it was dsi was an alternate ds light that had camera stuff i'm looking at it yeah it's right there um you're looking at that well my weird hybrid black and white one that's a ds light yeah and then that's a ds light xl at the bottom there's no dsi there uh above my green game boy above your green game boy that is a ds light that is a ds light yes yeah it's not a dsi no it's not but the ds but yeah but the dsi kept that yeah it's so yeah you know there was also a version that had like a max finish the fucking the apple years yeah right the nintendo apple years and those were clean and nice and i really really like those those are good those are good i was kind of disappointed with the original batch of 3ds because they were not nearly as clean and nice as

the ds lights they didn't keep the apple years i agree um but i uh yeah but but but but i fucking forgot my point so it sucks that's what that was your point my so no that was your point because the size and the holding and uh anyway well there's an obvious solution to this is just never play your switch outside of the dock mode well you see but i i take it on the plane when i go places yeah so do i and i have never taken it out of its box ever which pisses me off every time out of its box i've taken it well i i have a case for it yeah i've taken it on every trip i have made since its existence i have never once turned it on the product is allowed to not be for you that is okay

that is okay mm-hmm that's accurate uh what else that does not mean that i don't get to criticize it oh you can but if it falls within my realm of comfort okay that's fine you know what you know it doesn't fall within my realm of comfort okay now i'm excited i am getting really really peeved i'm getting miffed uh-huh at the continuing nonsense that is shenmu three and the reason why i'm getting peeved and pissed i am fully done now by the way i backed it the reason why i'm i'm getting unchuffed is because oh there's a feeling in my chest right now that

i can't quite identify that's new and i don't like it it's not anger it's like tired disappointment i don't even care about the part where like shenmu three is fucking up and all these bad things are happening the fact that um yusuzuki's name and all of this is ruining the good shit that like was otherwise a flawless track record all the ys games yusuzuki is pretty great right in my brain if there was a mistake this is how good it was an invented virtual fighter this is how good it was right in my brain like his name and the am2 shit like that in my brain it's a flawless track record two makes my dick hard even though even though there's probably some clunkers in there i probably i've i've rolled past them to and you're like that i'm gonna have

fun that palm tree means good shit yeah that signature means good shit right this is dragging that shit so what are you talking about exactly what what possible thing about shenmu three could upset you and and and fucking and just no i'm serious you have to say what it is we haven't talked about what i know i know but the thought i'm gonna ask the last priest the last setup line i was gonna say is on this clock reset is that epic with their new found form of post production i'll call it yeah because it's producing the game after it's already produced been made and produced yeah is you get to skate because you're like here's some money buy right and then you start out your problems whatever people expected of you whatever you set up whatever you promise

bye here's money buy right use don't know shenmu three backers will not receive retail exclusive content uh ys net can't seem to catch a break with shenmu three after a massive backlash about refusing refunds for players dissatisfied with the sudden epic game store exclusivity kickstarter backers will now not be receiving any retail exclusive content with their keys as discovered by vg247 a backers basically pointed out that they will need to pay backers will need to pay for any additional content because here's what it says standard and deluxe editions released through the retail sale will not be affiliated with the crowdfunding campaign because that's a thing that exists apparently that seems new and thus will not

be included with backer pledges they will be available for sale separately uh this creates a scenario where backers are now not getting a complete version of the game they helped bring to life uh also doubly confusing as both the kickstarter and slacker backer editions have exclusive content of their own thrown a season pass that has undefined content and is also not being given to backers and this has become a really crappy situation according to the destructoid article the reason why you make retailer exclusive dlc is because the retailers hey will you want us to stock your game a bunch whatever let's see make retailer exclusive dlc that's the thing that's been excited for a while the deal is is that as a kickstarter

your primary consumer base and priority should be the people who paid you money to make the game exist but oh you mean epic no i mean you mean epic no i mean the publisher that picked no you mean epic no i mean the no i'm saying the what is the publisher behind shenmu three yeah it's yeast games or some shit you spent yeast net they're the people who actually paid for most of shenmu three they went out and made a bunch of deals with retailers because the kickstarter has nothing to do with you or even kick starting at all it was a fucking focus test deep silver now okay fucking whatever right and deep silver doesn't give a shit and epic just give the money make it all go away

i hey woolly i have a i have a nice circle we can paint here i don't understand it's such an obvious fuck up to not make pokemon right famous big famous right everybody love it digimon actually put in the work right shenmu right how was judgment you played that this week pretty good was that a good time i would say work was put in would you say that that thing is exploding with care and attention to detail felt pretty good yeah did you feel ripped the fuck off not when i went through virtual fighter no you mean the game that should be in shenmu because it's made by the same man shenmu is also it's literally like it's the worst because not the worst but it's like it's

oh it's getting pretty bad it's get it's an extra bad situation because like even with what like we don't even know what the game is or how it's going to be and and shenmu three existing in a world that has yak is a and judgment out in it is already tough that's already a battle that is tricky because once upon a time like well god there's fucking there's like nine yak is a games nine or is it ten ten come on one zero zero through six right whammy one and two uh-huh black panther one two and three ishin and kenzon okay wow yeah i got nothing i got no idea willy yakuza is an annual franchise okay and they hit that annual okay dead souls dead souls as well i forgot that souls so it's

closer to 15 now jesus christ right if you include judgment like it was already a like really rough situation but hey we want to know what happened with rio landi yeah and that girl so let's find out you know those things where they go like in the period between this game and this game coming like this one sequel coming out this entire like in between dmc four and five i think the entire assassin's creed series has existed that kind of shit right yeah in the span of shenmu two to three yeah we will have had kiryu's entire storyline miimoto musashi's kiryu storyline the black panther storyline an online spin off and the new spin off like yakuza series for all intents and purposes are is over until yakuza shin comes out or shin yakuza whatever but like

that whole thing that i know it drove matt crazy to me for me to say like you don't need another shenmu game because yakuza straight up replaced it but the more that i dug into it and saw hey guess what a lot of people who worked on shenmu worked on yakuza one and yakuza two and it's a sega game it's made by those people the big deal was negoshi wanted to do a fucking shenmu game that had to do with crime and it had a really small he wanted to make the the fucking one city block rpg and he did he totally did 15 times in a row to to change speeds entirely uh i would say on a just a purely kickstarter discussion level the worst thing you can do to someone who's a kickstarter backer on your project is not make the thing that you took their money for that's the

worst that son told me not to make yes that is the number that's the number one that's the one we go to every time you can't you can't beat that right but number two is probably um just having no respect for the the the backer in terms of like everything around the project right so you know um mighty number nine in the 3ds version right yeah right well that's that's that didn't come out that's not yeah you're right so that's a non-release yeah okay but but like the second worst thing you do then is things like this where you go well we're thank you for helping us out with the pledge but turns out that pledge was not a pledge it was just a vote it was a popularity vote and we didn't actually need that money we just needed to prove that people were interested

and so we're going to treat that popularity as a pre-order or whatever but not really because you're in a you're in a pre-order in a different place for a different version while we incentivize every other thing because say we need to incentivize them so you didn't need any incentive because you bought it because you're an idiot these people they need an incentive so we need to give them a better deal well it's more along the lines of after that Kickstarter campaign happened and then everything was successful and it went through uh the game then began like development became normal game development yeah and now it is going through normal game development um with no with the with the backer campaign being a footnote exactly exactly so you're getting all the you're getting the

exclusive the special editions you're getting dlc you're getting a season pass you're getting all the things that are normally associated with a regular game except you have these people that you're indebted to that you asked money for that you were actually indebted to and that like where there are not you told them how much of their money was being was actually necessary in the grand scheme of things which is zero actually it was zero right but that's not how those people are going to feel about it when they gave you their money the so now you have a bunch of people that you're treating like shit because you're just going about business as usual as if they their backing didn't matter which it turns out it didn't because it wasn't actually the total

amount you were backing for anyway whether or not you need it like if this is the second worst thing you can do to a Kickstarter group whether or not you need it when you beg for money you should make sure that the deal you're offering those whom you are begging for money will be the best deal right so this has created a situation where say you snap or whoever want to send me for and they go to Kickstarter why no that's never gonna happen but but let's imagine right why would you ever ever back it when you know you'll actually get a much better deal at like monetarily but also content wise by sticking around and waiting just wait and also hey why not take it a step further and just buy it deeply discounted on sale oh were the people that backed shenmu three the

people that care the most about shenmu yes the people who should get the best stuff who in fact aren't going to be get shat on the most when that's the opposite of how that should go just like imagine it's so nuts so you know that they are letting this happen so you know the term slacker back or everybody it's the people who back after the Kickstarter campaign they usually have to back like five dollars extra to get the same rewards whatever the fuck because it's an extra hassle and they couldn't guarantee the money when they were planning blah blah blah blah blah blah this is a situation in which hey woolly you backed day one of the Kickstarter okay Kickstarter's over okay we don't have enough money slacker backers you can get a full upgrade tier higher for the same

amount no original backers you may not refund your thing and get a slacker backer thing no no slacker backers are a new hotness okay still don't have enough money slacker or backers you will now get a coke with your with your pledge everything the other guys got and a coke and it's like take your Kickstarter pledge down to game stop and hand them the money and then tell them you want to kickstart Shenmue 3 and they'll take it and go okay yeah honestly get your refund and if you still want the game go and pre-order it at a retail location you'll get a better version of the fucking game or better yet refund your money and then don't it's not even about a better version of the game because we don't even know what the content is going to be at any it will

flat be a better version but the problem the problem is not even that it's not even that it's that you you it's stupid it's stupid there's no complete version of the game right the stuff that you get for being a slacker backer is different from being a Kickstarter it's a Kickstarter different from being a pre-order person with the regular retail you know those charts people mock Ubisoft for making you shouldn't need one for a fucking Kickstarter game hey mean you kickstarted Shovel Knight a lot of people kickstarted Shovel Knight right right that game's still not done still waiting for the battle mode guess what the three versions of the game they put out awesome i'm still gonna get that fucking battle mode when that drops

awesome i feel really really good about helping yacht club make that game yeah it made me feel really smart yeah and then i did a good thing yeah uh the final thing that i just i think about now is just that like so all that bad all that bad press in the past a couple weeks a lot of that falls on epic because people are a lot of it because people are just like fuck we hate your store epic that's the but ultimately everyone goes we understand the games buying into a deal they can't refuse that's right right they could have refused this deal in a second this is not this an epic stepping into payback the the refunds and whatnot is like okay yep epic does what they want to do and they continue to take that heat because they're still putting the game in a place

where people don't want it how do i fucking even get a refund i actually do want to get a refund but i don't know where to send the email the fact that this stupid shit is happening due to modern nickel and diming season pass exclusive content bullshit that's just like completely and utterly unnecessary it should be removed from crowdfunded game like you shouldn't need it because hey guess what you got paid for right just the most optional fuck up i have seen all year this is an optional fuck up you didn't meet this is dlc fuck up you you purchased the five season pass and now you're getting optional like optional anger from everybody that you didn't need to do you could have completely avoided this by just making

the game just make the game it's so weird when it gets this convoluted in an attempt to make a little bit extra and in the process just garner so much frustration from everyone that already gave you money it's not just angry internet voices mobbing in the wind it's people that paid you man plan to offer refunds this was july 2nd so i don't think they've even started it yet but for the fucking am to man is not am to use Suzuki this is not am to ease there will not be a fucking sega am to fucking logo at the beginning of this game fuck that that yeast RPG game that everyone cares about the only yeast that mattered was that no that's not sure but nonetheless this is the east that i think of more than the other i highly suggest taking all of your weird frustrations

with shen mu and going and checking out judgment i am i am actively checking out judge that is that is not just to you that's obviously i was talking to christ susie got into it a ton of people are like holy shit this game like hey guess what that series is awesome and does everything that you wanted shen mu to do way better other than finish the shen mu storyline yeah we are fortunately in a world where you have a choice to not care about what's happening here also as as a person who i've never played the shen mu series ever um i have only seen other people play it and to this day i don't get it i backed it because i thought it would be cool but like that game looks terrible and the voice acting is embarrassing in a really awkward horrible way

i don't get it i really don't get it you spend the whole game training and learning moves for two fights so you get two chances to actually when did shen mu two come out 2001 four years later yakuza one came out and made it look like a joke i cared about shen mu at the time didn't care about shen mu two enough to beat it strung me along too long dropped off shen mu was already coming back with weights on this is unnecessary and like if it came out no problems and just had the content the content on its own had issues to address yeah now it's just all around everything about it

and that fucking sucks so yeah yay for judge eyes i still wish they called it judge eyes out here yeah but i i addressed that in the video uh i put out which you can check out on willy versus where i take a look at the game we forgot to do our little thing but uh i think it might have check out angriest pad on twitch i do twitch stuff uh i think it might have to do with the fact that the eye of judgment exists problem therefore you could necessarily go that way on it but i like the first one you've really properly dived in on yes minus testing three do you like like super long camera angles of hyper detailed japanese old man's faces yes yeah it is the only game that does that and it's obsessed with it it's crazy just stare at the pores every pore

i wouldn't be surprised if he lifts his hand into the frame and it's just a single block polygon because it's like all of the work is done in the face and there's just no body there yeah but uh yeah i i i've said it already but i like i know i can tell those games the are like they're they're full of like fucking me juice i just it's just the time me juice it's just the time they're rpg's they are 40 to 50 hour long rpg's yeah so uh like plan it accordingly yeah i like everything i've ever seen and associated with it's just it's just it's just the time like i saw some people kind of going oh no woolly tested three that's the worst one therefore he hates it i'm like no no no no no no no no no that's not true no plus i liked what i saw when i tested it yeah

because i'm like holy shit this game is huge that's a big it also a big crazy japan with people walking around doing shit it was amazing at the time it also has like one of my favorite of your testing stories which is you seeing the physical oh what was it it's the book that was the text the localization uh uh uh fucking uh chart list yeah like just the impossible an actual impossible task that was like one of the first games i've ever seen where everyone walking around has their little thought bubbles and you just go no no you can't no that is not how you do it and they're like how long will it take us to translate this game and like i had to have meetings upon meetings to have a real to just sit people down and go do you understand like what we're

talking about here like every few steps every every random person's speech is translated yes and i planned the translation fucking uh testing plan for scribble knots dude yeah okay i put a scribble knots plan into action for figs d e figs d all the languages whatever and master plan this entire thing the word game i i and it worked and i looked at this and had a fucking aneurysm no way no how so i remember when i was i was on the screaming for yakuza 5 train right it was like come on guys and they're and the it always came back so like these games don't sell and it's expensive to translate them it's the only time that excuse ever came up that people went yeah we know but we'll buy it we promise yeah it was not like no that's

ridiculous no it can't cost that much it was like no we the fans of that series no oh my god it's so much text and the fact that they dubbed it this time around with judgment too and they have a second subtitle track for the dub for the correct closed pathway that's crazy there is so much money put into this localization i mean i i assume that like if they get you in they realize that we got you yes people who get in on this get it for for for fucking life you got 15 games to go back through while two of them never came out if five of them never came out here well but that's still 12 that's a lot of them uh let's see minor story minor story minor story um yeah let me just cut some of these small small

stories out no big deal here fan fire hunter d creator announces a new anime oh cool that's cool that partner he's a cool guy it yeah he hates vampires welcome multiplayer modes in dark pictures men of medium are interesting because they're multiplayer versions of uh until dawn gameplay saying on that is they're like we want to have an anthology of eight that is that is dark shit yeah um ninja warriors again comes out july 25th give them your energy ninja warriors again is hot oh did we make fun of g2a this week uh gto g2a no i didn't catch anything hey guys okay we promise we'll stop buying stolen keys um so hey here's how we're gonna promise you not send us all of your keys for your game and then we'll make sure that nobody tries to sell them to us oh yeah right and

it's like yeah i promise i won't rob your house just give me your valuables oh yeah i won't go in your house i promise just put all your shit out on the porch uh that fuck they're so crooked so funny one is xbox germany making a big oopsie oh no big what ohs uh what oh big what oh i've never heard that one before i like it so xbox germany accidentally posted on facebook and twitter that final fantasy seven remake would be coming to xbone on march 2020 that's not real that's super not real and uh they literally like they've got the fucking the ad and the date and everything and that's a mistake but it got posted and then deleted and dubbed an internal mistake from the crew uh and that's the same month as ps4 yeah which

gets everybody going what ha now obviously then square came out and said no that's not real obviously everyone remembers or if you don't uh you should remember that when f of seven was announced the first thing it said was first on playstation it did didn't say only on and they they made some hesitant hand washing when talking about the pc that will happen eventually right but that could be a year or two year whatever when they get around to it like ff15 was um but it's probably gonna come to other consoles eventually but it'd be silly to think it was not the same month yeah that's that's actually more work than i think they have available like to to they seem to be putting a lot of money into that game it'd be stupid to not put it elsewhere right but also the same month but like

a couple weeks apart that's no one does that that's insane that's not what that means no one pays no one pays that money no one does that that's not worth it this will probably get ported not to the xbox one but to the xbox scarlet xbox two scarlet yeah probably called the xbox two and all that name stuff is forgiven because that means we'll go the xbox original the xbox 360 the xbox one and the xbox one s one s uh digital uh uh xbone sad yeah xbone sad i hate the name xbox now i really don't like it and they're stuck with they screwed it up they're stuck with it super hard but like it says a lot that no one ever called the 360 that i just called it the 360 yeah i was trying to make a point yeah and instead of saying the xbox 360 i said

360 no one ever called it their xbox yeah and ps is a ps is a ps and you add the number so that's done and then they can't they're basically not allowed to change it nintendo's the only one that gets their name used the way it should because it has been in the word nintendo in front of me and and then a thing and your mom calls it the nintendo the nintendo and she's accurate when she's right she's not wrong the nintendo is a sliding scale do you like your new nintendo yes mother i do like my new nintendo yeah yeah so you call it the switch call it the we call it the we you guess what those are the names of the thing you know this this this like weird mic microsoft situation is one where no one uses the name it's it's the ultimate because every time

they tried to get for maximum brand efficiency by changing it to whatever they thought was hot right now right they called it the xbox because hey remember most people probably don't remember the story the reason why it's called the microsoft xbox is because they were never able to think up a name better than the games than the system's fucking prototype name which was based on direct xbox the direct xbox no one at the company was able to come up with a better name than xbox so they put out what we now know to be a stupid fucking name called xbox and then when they did 360 they didn't want us to look like the two was less powerful than the ps3 so they went with some in the hail corporate jerk off shit about the odds that whoa you turn around whatever i keep going

back on that one and wondering like is there a chance it was so dumb but is there a chance that they were right that you could find a test group of people that are so stupid yeah that they go well i don't know that that number is smaller that's a playstation 3 i absolutely believe that that was very real data that fucking terrifies me because that like the ps3 is better than the xbox too because it's bigger because it's the newer version that is so like that's the part that like at first i was like microsoft is stupid what are you doing and then i was like no the fact that that's actually a thought that they were trying to avoid because they were scared of that is we live in a world that has the worst console slash handheld name ever in the form of the new 3ds yeah

we use terrible new 3ds excel xbox is terrible but the new 3ds line excel is the worst naming convention ever for anything because then you had to ask people for the new new 3ds the excel uh i feel like we would probably all be happier in a world where the project name was just the console name i'm still disappointed except what xbox being the exception to the rule i'm still disappointed we didn't get the god damn sega katana katana dolphin dolphin's dolphin's so good as a as a console name i'd be super happy remember what the 3ds is one no no sorry the ds ds was nitro nitro yes yeah nrt always always the yeah all the the dev kit stuff yeah was it yep no it was all it was all nrt stuff um god what was the we won the we won had a had a

we was dolphin we you is something that i can't remember um we we games have dlp on them revolution no you're wrong dolphin is way older than that dolphin yeah revolution that's what it was revolution yes and and revolution was like it was stuck in everyone's hands like oh my god the console is going to be called the nintendo revolution sick of getting cool names for things yep only to have the name that comes down the like scarlet you know what that's fine i would totally i would take it xbox scarlet i was called at scarlet that's where i was going that's fine that's where that's 100 percent where i was going but it's not going to be called yeah the ultra 64 you know what actually

scorpio is called scorpio so maybe project cafe durango yeah yeah just use the project names except for project xbox yeah except for that one that one stupid you fucked up that one scorpio and scarlet are fine yeah they are and they did use scorpio so maybe they will actually keep scarlet if they just called it the microsoft scarlet that'd be fine yeah that'd be fine that'd be fine it's like okay cool you're done we're moving on and we're using sony's locked in they can't call it anything other than ps5 yeah you know remember when um uh apple the the os's were like panther i do and fucking like yeah big cat and that's why that's why the uh browser is called safari eh you never put that together no no kidding yeah big cats on the safari yeah

huh wow i didn't know that that's really fun interesting vita means life apple can go fuck themselves by the way by the way apple on safari with your big cats what um project names it's the better way did you guys really not get that no one got that that's that's yeah it's obvious i didn't know it came out at the same time um and then the last thing we were gonna bring up was that respawn is now talking about how they're gonna deal with apex cheaters it's a good plan and the plan so far is looks like they're looking for uh cheater jail aka cheaters will have to fight each other i this is cool in concept but not an execution and here's why it makes a but it's better when it's one on one because then you can assure that it's all cheaters the problem is that cheaters

probably wouldn't be that upset about fighting a bunch of other cheaters with their big cheats on yeah they'd probably just have a big old cheaty time yeah right the jail system works for people that do things like um rage quit for example where it's not about cheating so much as it is like fuck you you didn't win bullshit like bad bad bad bad manners bad manners people should be forced to fight other people with bad manners yeah cheaters should just be banned yeah see overwatch his new anti-cheat system no it's controversial and i don't know how i feel about it because it seems really stupid when cheating is detected the match will end the idea is that they don't here's the thing instead of kicking the player competitive

overwatch if you just kick the player that team is still down five six until someone new joins no someone new is not gonna join in competitive there's rain uh yeah right and if five on six means you're fucked and you can't quit because then you'll get locked out of your shit so you're fucked and right so the idea player match people join and drop yeah oh yeah who cares right in competitive competitive you would you're just fucked when the cheat system kicks somebody you're the game is lost yeah no end the game i agree the current the current solution to that that i saw people talking about is it's this is stupid and it sucks but it's better than the current thing which is the people on the cheaters team have to agree to throw the match

like they want the cheater to stay but then the rest of the team will throw the match to even it out say like sorry is that a in-game prompt no that's just like that's the best you could hope for is that people have good just good hearts and yeah no um yeah end the match the idea that makes sense the game is tainted and yeah people who cheat will get really sick of just not being able to play the game at all yeah exactly yeah that that that's the thought process but also in anything competitive like yeah the game is tainted there's nothing you can do with that i have a new system it's called if they detect cheats on your system a man comes to your house and throws rocks through your windows how about everybody gets the cheats and everybody gets well i mean that's a different

thing altogether if one man if one person cheats everybody oh shit oh no whoops if one person cheats everybody cheats they just saw that embarrassing thing in your home it's nothing yeah i know but there's nothing that's all fine that was a kitchen you knocked you you knocked chat down everyone's okay it's it's it's okay you guys oh god don't don't do it it's not a big two cameras that's it's not a big deal let's don't do that that's odd it's all good it's it's cool what are you doing i don't care i'm making a point here i got nothing to hide that thing doesn't seem really stable man no i just i loosened it to do that and now we're tighten it again visuals i really knocked the camera think that everyone in

the game should get cheats except the person who's cheating then their game oh the instant cheating is detected everyone gets cheats and you don't and you don't that's super fun yeah and then it doesn't tell you it doesn't tell you but you just end up sucking and everyone fucking crushes you and you don't know why you know you know what we were talking about this the other day after the reasonable two stream you know how like a battle royale games will put you in a game with bots that are easy to beat yeah they should do the opposite you get caught you get caught you get thrown into a bot match oh nintendo with like god bots nintendo replaces everyone in like like with when you switch disconnect on on the old smash yeah replaces it with cpu level 99 cpu yeah yeah yeah

just head shot it out of the gate oh yeah how's it feel yeah it feels bad huh and everyone's still talking normally yeah so you still hear them yeah but it just doesn't make sense yeah you've just been ghosted into a phantom game and you're like guys where are you going guys what's happening yeah absolutely anyway so apex cheat in your video games close but not throw up no cigar you know you can't that's not it's not who you're like the people who were talking to that are like how to remember those forums where people would cheat and then like complain oh i do yeah so those are like joyful rich fulfilling like some warm makes it all worth it it's it makes it all worth it it's a warm broth of just soup that you just when are you gonna start selling those you know it gets

right inside it's it's beautiful however that does not represent the average cheater i think the average cheater is just a fuckboy that just doesn't care i think blasting whatever shitty fucking i think the most respectable uh response to hey stop cheating in your video games is yeah i don't care i just want to have fun and have fun unless i win yeah and i'm like you're an asshole but at least i can understand the a to b to c yeah like that's that's i i know that person i've known many of those people where like like they're doing a bunch of other shit in life in general they don't care it is also bad and then exactly and then then they go and like oh let me play some games for a bit and then they just do that and they cheat and they go like

yeah whatever yeah that was fun i had fun winning and if they get banned from the game they're like oh whatever that game sucks and then go play another like that's it it doesn't matter so i had a i had a friend of a friend uh so basically my friend was talking to me and he was getting really sick because an old pal of his from college would get into a game uh with him and be like hey man come come play this game with me right and my friend would start enjoying it's a league or something like that and then this person would get inevitably banned for being super de duper toxic and then 180 on it and be like that game suck i never liked that game that games crap come play this new game with me and and the process would repeat like four times a year just over and over and over

and every time the word came down from anyone like hey why don't you just stop typing and chat not man i can do whatever i want and fuck these games they can't tell me what it's like every time every time okay can't go to bagel boss anymore can't you can't do it have you ever thought of just shutting your fucking mouth when you got outside gotta go to that ever been a thought that popped in your head gotta go somewhere else uh all these restaurants are out to get me let's take some emails hey you want to send an email in you can send it to castle super beast mail at gmail.com that's castle super beast mail at gmail.com have you ever thought about just shutting your fucking mouth you catch the follow-up there's a fucking follow-up to that there's a part two

then there's the web okay so bagel boss aka short man walks into a bagel store loses his mind because he's yelling at his past while everyone else is in the present and like he's doing that thing where you're crazy yelling and it looks like you could just go nuts at any time like he's getting angry at the fact that women on dating sites that laugh at him for being short shorter than me for fuck's sake he's a tiny man and everyone in reality is like we're we're in the real world and he's just screaming at his past and um and then uh you know they've then like further further things found further digging found that his youtube channel where he uploads himself yelling at people on a regular basis it's a thing um those all got deleted very quickly i don't know if you saw i didn't

but then there was the news interview where he where he uh calmly describes that you know uh he he got a little scuffed up but not not but not a big deal he got took a bigger scuff later that day from when he went into the woods with a bat to take out his anger on the trees yeah but no big deal ultimately he's the martin luther king of bullying uh no of short people well he said of bullying but he also said he laid again later short people as a short person i do not acknowledge this is man's ascendancy to a position of power like i said he's an admiral in napoleon's army god bless it's it is a cartoonish depiction of something that people it is it is when people like talk about like short man complex or whatever yeah like this is more ridiculous than the joke

in those people's minds exactly that that's like this is the purest most like is this real is this really happening if this is a bit you're doing a good bit and the accent and oh anyway yeah the accent really kicks it home doesn't it holy shit anyway um god bless don't be trash people come on i know you want to be trash but just don't be trash aron says hey guys what's the weirdest billboard sign you've ever seen mine was one that read what would jesus think porn destroys love followed immediately by five signs in a row for the adult superstore at the next exit it's good it's good i think the weirdest billboard or advertisement uh i don't think it was a billboard but it was a big ad and it was

walking out of the theater downtown after the theater was filled with a shit ton of anti-vap advertisements don't vape vape's bad for you and there were signs pointing the way to the weed store less than 100 feet away and it was like don't vape buy weed from the government yeah yeah don't vape vaping could cause you to crash your car this way but that's a that's a canadian exclusive currently in terms of bizarreness what was that movie three billboards outside of something Missouri yeah it was it was a movie i wanted to see didn't bother um yeah i don't know i don't i don't i

haven't committed any to brain but i've certainly seen a bunch of hilarious ones but none none of that like burnt in yeah definitely not never seen a religious billboard i i'm i always get a good sensible chuckle out of the aggressiveness of the american ones that i come across every time i'm down there and i see some lawyer going hard like like are you hurt like it's it's weird because it's like it's always a question just like are you entitled to money before you see the doctor call me and it's like the dude and it's like you and like well like it'll be like a some dude in a suit with like a crazy fucking like standing on a cliffside with god rays on him or just some nuts thing and teach you to trick your doctor into giving you money call

this fucking number yeah you don't know what you are owed until you call me i can tell you how hurt you are i don't know what it is but every time i go down to the states i'm always befuddled at the amount of car parks and storage facilities always with the storage facilities i don't get it what are you people storing why so much i mean i had a need for storage facilities recently when like we had to put someone's stuff in a storage place you don't need to advertise it if you need it you need it i guess so i guess a lot of people are getting kicked out of houses and need somewhere to put their shit dude oh drugs yeah okay the drugs oh drugs big crime okay crime crime and drugs crime got it okay yeah that makes sense hey why is that lawyer's

number one eight hundred free money call this number we're not saying we're not promising you anything but if you call one eight hundred free money we'll take your case american tv is so nice i love it uh love it america you're weird hey guys local lost tonight here who oh my god damn it hold on i need where's my what the i'm gonna excuse me what was that for time i'm just gonna get all right so who wants to pick what item i put my balls on in woolly's house as he moves himself from view okay here we go what is this oh yeah all done

all done got a good got a good smear on that totally not recorded on camera there seinfeld all right my wife's sign fell toothbrush that's why i didn't actually swab your your thing don't worry i never do it on camera that's how you go to jail now wait swabbing your balls on people's items isn't jail worthy is it don't do it it's a joke have you experienced the modern true horror that is reddit clips of people licking things in stores or spitting into jugs of iced tea and putting it back on the on the rack how do you spin the jug of iced tea and then put it back on the rack you open it you spit in it you close

it back and you put it back on the rack who's stupid enough to fucking people filming themselves on instagram no no not that no that that answer i know is people dumb enough to ha ha so girl licks ice cream yeah because because um what's her name did it yeah but but um who is stupid enough to get a liquid food that is opened oh yeah that like yeah that seals broken leave the store what seal yeah exactly you know when you know when you get a snapple you know the thing on the top can you do that right now before you buy it throw that thing into the sky away from you as far as it can go well the one that gets me a lot of the time is i don't know how often you drink like a sports drink of some kind but sometimes they have a seal under the the quick sip lid sometimes

there's nothing yeah those are the ones you buy the ones that have a seal but how do you yeah and this thing is i never know which brand has it and which does it and i've had ones where like i go to open it and like oh it's already poured out on but i'm thirsty and it already i already walked away from the store yeah so woolly i don't know if you remember this but about two years on the podcast i actually put this fear forth and you laughed and laughed and laughed because we were describing a situation in which a server at a restaurant brought a meal you don't want people messing with compliments of the chef or whatever right and i described that that terrified me and that i would leave yeah because of this okay but that is still irrational and specific this is everyone getting

super super fucking pissed at the idea of like someone out there in the world at a nearby store that you might walk into fucking with your shit yeah for instagram walls yeah and it's uh i believe on depending on where you are it could be classified as first degree assault yeah poisoning well what everyone wants to see the maximum hurt put on the person because it's like it's so light in general like criminal context but it's so it's like littering right but it's so fucking disgusting and disturbing but to think that it just looks like yeah hey let's let's take an example right it just brings out the rage it brings out the rage no let's because it goes against the rules of society being sane and just trusting that other people are going to live

in let live let's let's let's play a game into why it's actually for real though it's let's say you have a bit of a cold and you do it yeah and let's say the person picking it up has a compromise immune system for whatever reason that could be a bullet yeah right like it's not fun let's say i don't know you had a peanut butter sandwich that day guess what guess what dead kid yeah right like now people with those allergies should obviously be very careful because everything in the air can kill them but like yeah i mean i remember back a while ago there was um something called the Tylenol murders do you ever hear about this oh yeah which is why people put rat poison in Tylenol which is why we have cotton inside of them yeah yeah i mean people with the severe peanut

allergies are also going they're doomed they're playing through a different version of the game yeah quite frankly um an unpatched insanely brutal version of the game why did you speck this way with possible buff did you get as a result very unfortunate you know what i mean i'm certainly maybe at one point when like the peanut cleansing occurs then like the sensitivity to it being in your area might be something that'll i don't know i'm trying to imagine a series of events where a peanut allergy or the big peanut comes down from the sky like cleanses all the non-peanuts where it's like a world where someone being sensitive to peanuts being nearby will save their life because people who can't detect peanuts being nearby get fucking killed by them you ever

see something that's like really funny but it's like so awful somebody in our chat just all caps speedrun strats that's that's why yeah that's why you get the peanut allergy yeah get that oak created time run down 17 minutes whoever said that that's awful to quote this very same so to quote us yeah start a new save start a new start a new start a new one um yeah don't tamper with people's fucking food fuck those people fuck those people that's that's where that's where we take that let that apex punishment and put it here where it's like for the next year you can only eat food the other people spit on yes i like that that makes me so anxious i'm having a fucking panic attack right now at the concept oh my god you are not allowed to consume anything oh shit unless someone

has fucked it up first in their choice of manner oh that's so bad for a year monitored oh you have no choice what are you gonna do not eat and just like the guy if you attempt to cleanse the food will bring out a new one for you a new one will be prepared you what are you gonna do just die you can't die you'll have to eat eventually fuck you it's one year that's the exact level that's the punishments it's the and it's not too much it's not too little it's just the same level of i bet most people would crack in like a day man like i mean look some people have like then like if you build up a like a i don't want to say a tolerance yeah a resistance if you're someone who eats food off the floor or garbage cans yeah then or just actual garbage then you're not

gonna really give a shit about that yeah but the people filming these videos for instagram are not those people i did so here's the thing right and i'm gonna be really really clear with my language as we are known people i'm in i'm legitimately in no way advocating that anyone do something immoral and in fact i'm advocating that you don't do things that are immoral what i am saying however is that if you're an instagram person and you are a known person and you you videotape yourself tampering with people's food you are essentially broadcasting to the world that it is fair game for people at restaurants to fuck with you if you if your face is out yeah like you are broadcasting to every waiter or cook that sees you yep that and all you're an

asshole and all they really have to do is when they bring you the bill just give you a little wink yeah you know and if you're done eating it's already done right like what are you thinking why broadcast such a specific thing that people can use to justify to themselves to fuck with you later it seems short-sighted total fair game like it's it's the equivalent of like hey check me out i'm fucking triple parked in a handicap space enjoy people feeling nothing as they double park you in the future right and you're gonna wish that you're getting spit in your food because that's that's the that's you know that's level one yeah let's be real it gets so much worse a lot of things coming out of this body people become desperate for attention without thinking

about what attention entails you're aware that if this video blows up really well that somebody who views it might i don't know work in law enforcement okay how many people sub to uh i'm a total piece of shit on reddit a lot millions oh yeah okay cool oh one of them's your boss oops sick you know my favorite is though of all this oh man called in sick to work fucking hype all my boss on my facebook yeah it's all so good it's so good you're so stupid why are you so stupid it it just like it's the best man and then they always feel the sharpest regret and it's just like where was this 10 seconds ago where was it where it didn't exist anyway local austinite here wants to say missed you guys at rtx last weekend based on your

comment your comments uh you might be interested to know the origin of the phrase keep austin weird i am i am interested what is way tamer than people think the phrase originated with the slogan of the austin independent business alliance as a means of promoting local small businesses over large chains the idea was to support small local shops and restaurants instead of wall martin mcdonald's supporting locally owned businesses meant giving money to your fellow austinites rather than corporate bob in an office across the country so the money would stay in the community the phrase came to be shorthand for deliberately choosing against the mainstream choice which over time evolved to be associated with all the general weirdness of the city dating back to the hippie days nowadays it's

just a tourist phrase that almost no one remembers what it originally meant that makes perfect sense yeah absolutely keep it local from ali essentially thanks ali ps bonus dumb bullshit don't mess with texas is actually from the texas department of transportation and they're as their anti littering slogan you thought that's where that's from you thought it was a cool phrase but it's actually about calling out pat littering live on stream i would never live litter in another place that i don't live that's immoral especially one where a bullet might meet you no that's not why it might come say listen i pay my taxes therefore i'm paying for people to pick up the garbage off the street therefore it's fine if i go somewhere else i'm

not paying them their taxes therefore i'm littering essentially for free which is immoral so as much as i enjoy or not really enjoy but as much as i watch and scroll through i'm a total piece of shit yeah there's also you know instant karma and justice served to where you could watch the dude instant karma is like it's delicious it's so good but it's fast too yeah and there's there's a and i mean there's all there's three of them there's instant karma there's uh uh justice served and then there's a convenient cop in some cases right but in particular a recent instant karma was like car window rolls down bottle flies out the window bottle goes right back in uh well not even okay so there's two there's the one where the can goes out the window and a girl picks up the can and throws it

and it boomerangs into the car and it's pretty sick before it drives off but no i'm not talking about that one i'm talking about the one where uh it's a taxi the bottle comes out the window taxi stops driver gets out like just kind of puts the hand up to the person who's recording and just kind of goes like hey sorry just give me a second opens up taxi door throws dude out and drives the fuck off and the dude's like why don't throw things out of a taxi window that's rude yeah yeah good times apparently that was a fake commercial was it yeah god damn it i got jubated ambiguity in fiction from ben he says there are deer watt and poolie i was a dude i do this thing where i

and poolie that sounds like shit i do this thing where i simultaneously appreciate writers leaving things ambiguous while also having strong feelings about the correct interpretation calling everyone who disagrees with me an idiot for example in the killing joke spoilers for a 30 year old batman story the ending is left clearly open to interpretation i believe batman killed the joker and that any other interpretation misses the point and undermines the quality of the work you you just said it was intentionally left open of interpretation in my mind not all ambiguity is meant to be to let the readers draw their own conclusions but uh that there's often an intended meaning that the author believes if we're smart enough to figure it out what are your

thoughts and are they and are there any ambiguous stories in which you feel strongly about a particular interpretation that depends on the author and often the author will literally say i left it open so that you could draw your own conclusions the most uh fucking apt of the time uh uh uh striking while the iron hot iron is hot version of this is ava where the oh man is to this like i as someone this weekend was talking about their interpretation of things yeah and then saying they watched another video which changed their mind on a few things and started going down a list of things where i was like what what are you talking about no what no we watched the same thing and then and then like uh someone else sent a video to me like yesterday that was

like hey there's a really good breakdown of what end of ava probably means and you know the best part about that is don't go to the author don't even talk to him about it because he'll just tell you to get fucked basically um and guess what that's what i that's my interpretation of evangillian yeah it's get fucked losers i don't care about your anime shit i'm depressed there are some things that are obvious about ava there are some things that are less obvious and there are things that you just guess because you like it that way you know it's hard to it's left open if it's too open don't like enjoy its openness yeah exactly that's where i was gonna where i was gonna say uh i one of the stories that uh i talked about on woolly will figure it out was one where uh i left the

story open ended because it doesn't matter what happens after that point yeah and that's good enough reason to stop where you stop there are endings in which the the some actual total let end of the plot doesn't matter because it's pointless yeah if the answer to what happens next is who cares you probably picked a good and more importantly if you then look at that and go no but who though the answer should be you're not supposed to care yeah the point is that it doesn't matter yeah yeah i that is my favorite version of an open ending when you clearly can see that like oh story stops right there doesn't matter it doesn't matter yeah like i i forget what it was but there was something that was like like but who was right after all and it's like it doesn't matter

because they wrecked everything yeah and their whole lives are ruined now because of the argument the biggest one of all time is probably the sopranos and i originally hated it and then liked it later um the the cut to black the cut to black i think it yeah uh but i and i like it based on what i feel that probably could mean but ultimately i it's one of those it's one of those discussions that it's like in interviews like 10 years later uh fucking dude was like accidentally letting he actually he phrased something in such a way that it gave more that it yeah that it basically referred to tony is no longer alive okay and therefore betrayed his intentions yeah you know now i saw people reminiscing about like there's the ending to um the thing uh the very end is

McCready the thing is child's the thing or neither of them thing or are both of them the thing it doesn't matter it's not you're not supposed the the the question that you feel at the end of that movie is the ending not like theory crafting oh maybe McCree McCready drank from the thing that it's it's not who cares why do you choke her out though who why did you choke her out she's a bitch is it this that simple is it not about like one person who ultimately is needy doing the thing that is against them and going to the furthest extreme of their character which he did at the beginning and then she who is also a kind of an opposite version of the same problem i mean you could look at that that is not a wrong reversal on a real core basis it's the

world is end is over and he fucked up and the first person he sees is the biggest bitch in the universe you know or fuck that bit someone else said or like you like he like he can't exist coexist properly with other people and that's why the first thing he does is reject the first person that exists outside of himself in this new you know there's a lot there's just i mean i could get in with it if you like because i find it interesting no i'm good i've done it way too many times yeah see that's probably the difference yeah and hey what is the footage from 4.0 mean it means go fuck yourself movie watcher i hope you don't enjoy good movie that's what the director said to you he said that 20 years

uh sure dare willow and pig night pat is obsessed with immortality but what kind of immortality i'd love to hear your answer to woolly would you like the kind that is mutant healing like wolverine no full burst full cybernization like the major yep unkillable like vandal savage hell no live as long as you care to like the elves from lord of the rings that's a good one nanomachines from transcendence that's all right age so slowly that you witness the heat death of the universe like superman that one's really bad small plaques thick hard drive that's transformable between bodies like altered carbon yeah that's fine backup clones like the sixth day no sixth day is a nightmare immortality download your consciousness into a machine like

soma no it doesn't count disintegration and painfully reassembling yourself bad and by adam like dr manhattan that's obviously quite bad yeah you'd go for the major i go for you'd go for a ghost without a shelf the the yeah i'll take the robot because i want to be a robot but um the the important distinction between immortality and nobody actually wants immortality everyone wants eternal youth yes yeah exactly the ability to live forever is great right up until the earth dies or your body is worthless or it becomes trapped in a glacier or yeah right yeah you need you need to be able to pull the plug yeah at you need to be like okay well i'm in space and i'm hurtling towards the sun it's going to take me about a thousand years

to hit the sun and then when they do hit the sun it's going to be infinite agony for four million years time to stop thinking yeah time to learn how to stop thinking yeah yeah that's pretty straightforward could you imagine if he hadn't learned how to stop thinking how bad that would be it'd be the worst anyone ever got it well it'd be like a ninja scroll guy he gets it so bad he gets it really bad he gets it so bad because he doesn't have he's down there he's not even that far he's he's really not even that far it's basically deode except he's not gonna know or can't move uh and lastly dear beast cast uh lackluster uh i recently beat persona q2 yeah i thought it was a little fun send off to the 3ds but the final

attack the hero's due to finish the final boss was lame really uh partly because it's an rpg you joker minato and femc do their big final attack and when the damage number shows up it only did 920 damage when you can easily do over a thousand not even power charged which just made me laugh instead of get super hyped that's really dumb are there any supposed big final attacks that you can think of that are super lame in games uh i was thinking about f of seven the other day because uh everybody's final limit does like the damage cap but a lot of people's final limits hit like 10 times and other people's hit everyone in the party once so like tifa and and cids like do like hundreds and hundreds of thousands of hits of damage and like red 13s does

like 20k 30k omnislash does fucking 150 000 damage to one target like it sucks it's why it's why i like um you played f of 10 yeah you play of course you did in f of 10 once you get certain upgrades you break the damage cap which i always find really satisfying hmm uh yeah gino world yeah that that was fucking what yeah there's you can't do that many numbers what are you talking about uh i mean going back to it like final form daunte and dmc one is pretty fucking lame because he just turns into sparta for some reason yeah and then he summons a dragon named puff i will say there is the opposite version of this which i'm starting to enjoy even more

which is the you know instead of the ultimate attack big number it's negating the big attack go on so in uh pretty much all my big number games let's take 14 the boss is going to do the gigantic raid wide that can almost wipe everybody but you stacked enough defense that the number that pops up after the hit is zero and instead of missing it says the name of the attack and then zero yeah yeah yeah it's like okay yes delicious sure you numbered it up um yeah i'm having a hard time scraping for any but surely there is something out there that is like really anti-climactic but yeah uh nope nope those are all cool like just writing down the list of yep that's all super cool

beautiful joe did it really cool wonderful 101 did it really cool big cool final cool oh well oh well sorry dude that's the example you used kind of set the bar too high yeah like 9 20 damage holy shit when a normal guy when you when one character can do a thousand on it shouldn't have had a damage number associated at all actually i mean super robot wars does that where they just fucking add an extra digit yeah you know like yeah fuck you that thing's dead i remember one of the things the borderlands does and what World of Warcraft does is that when your damage number gets high enough it becomes number number number k so instead of doing you know 800 damage you're doing thousand point two k damage per hit yeah cool cool cool cool okay all right shit's done

shit's over go home or stay at home you don't have to go home you don't have to go home you can't stay here that's that's the podcast will be over in like just a second so so so so so so

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