Castle Super Beast - CSB 059: Absolute Drug Baby Loves to Get Wet

Episode Date: March 10, 2020

Download for Mobile | Podcast Preview | Full Timestamps Castle Prepper Beast begins. World of Horror, Sonic Robo Blast 2, Final Fantasy 7 Remake Demo. You can watch us record the podcast live on twitch.tv/castlesuperbeast Outro: Project Justice - Rooftops Get 20% off and free shipping with the code SUPERBEAST at http://manscaped.com Start your risk-free, 100 day trial and shop the entire Away lineup of travel essentials at http://awaytravel.com/beast. Ghost of Tsushima launches June 26, story trailer Prinny 1•2: Exploded and Reloaded announced for Switch Puzzle adventure game Shovel Knight Pocket Dungeon announced Mortal Kombat 11’s Spawn Debuts on March 24, 2020 Mortal Kombat 11 tournament plans altered last-minute due to coronavirus concerns Sega pivots Sonic reveal event after SXSW cancellation Dead or Alive 6 now charging players to change character hair color, re-charges for each change After 15 years of hard work, Black Mesa is finally out Final Fantasy 7 Remake Producer Thinks It'd Be a 'Waste' to Not Return to Parasite Eve

— Hello. Hello. Hey. I offered you this before, but mayhaps you could have it again. Would you like a carrot? — Sure, I'd like a carrot. — Okay, I will eat it for you. Mmm, delicious. — What are you doing? — Right now? I'm eating a carrot. It's a... — You're eating a... Why are you eating a carrot on the podcast?

— Because I am hungry and carrots are good for you. — Please don't eat into the microphone. — Okay. Is this better? — See, the problem is that before, I was just taking the complaints of people that were upset, but now I have to hear it. — Oh, that's right. — And that's not okay. — Mm-hmm. So, you addressed the elephant in the room. — Are you a prepper now?

— I am not a prepper. However, do you hate the UCA and the goddamn bridges? — I mean, yeah. But that's not why I'm at home today. So for those of you who cannot see me right now, hello, I'm currently in my home, sitting on my couch with a carrot. And the reason for that is because I am jealous of Woolly getting to do the podcast in his pajamas, but I cannot appropriately leave the house wearing my pajamas. — So, fuck it. — Sounds like everyone bought it. — Okay. So, no, the for real answer is that, unfortunately, we seem to be going through

a trying time in the world today, what with Corona. And as there are some cases in Montreal, Paige and I are trying to limit our exposure to everything and everyone, because if anybody sneezes on that woman, she will just instantly die, as she is a compromised lupus-based immune system. So, I'm doing my part, which is not going over to your house and touching your things. — Right. So... — Which I do. Prep, when you're not looking. — So, prepper, then.

— Well, I've gotten to eat some really delicious breakfasts out of it, because Paige is actually a really good cook. — Are there... What's the last human being you've seen? Is it just Uber Eats? — What's the last human being you've seen? Is it just Uber Eats? — No, this is like people at the grocery store. — Okay. — Because you've got to get food from the grocery store. — Okay. I'm trying to figure out what degree of... Because there's the, you know, there's

the clear-stated concern, and then there's the goblins, and the goblins are going to take whatever the reasonable level of concern is and crank that bitch up just a little bit. — So, the funny thing? — So, if you tell me that you got your hazmat suit in the mail coming in an Amazon box, this is where I'm not too surprised, but I'm not trying to... — No, no, that'd be ridiculous. — Excuse me. — Would it? Would it?

— No. — Tell me what wouldn't be ridiculous. — What wouldn't be ridiculous? — I don't know, man. Like, before the grocery store, I think the last human person we saw was at a local restaurant we'd go to, but Uber Eats, in particular, because those are just regular Uber drivers who are going back into and from the airport, Uber Eats had to go right away. Like, that was, like, the single most, like, mmm, mmm, nah, nah. — Okay, well, here we are.

— Hey, man, when I get sick and die, you'll be thankful that I didn't get you, too. — That's how it's gonna go. — Yeah, maybe. Fuck it. I hope that you are able to make the best of this new world of Street Fighter III that you find yourself trapped in. — It honestly changes precious little about my life, and that has me somewhat concerned. — Mmm. — I had this moment of, like, hmm, what if I were to— — You're on quarantine lockdown, they say. What changes?

— Yeah. — This, and almost nothing else. — This. — That's about it. — It's one of those things, you know, when people say, I'm gonna boycott all of EA's games, and you're like, well, that's really easy, because all they put out is dog shit now. There's nothing that I actually want to get from the EA now. — You know, it turns out you've been living in quarantine for a while now, so.

— I think the funniest thing is I was thinking about this the other day. Do you remember back in the day, like, around the first time when we first knew each other, I used to get chronic bronchitis every single year? — I don't. — Okay, well, I did. I get horrible bronchitis every year around flu season. And then I stopped getting chronic bronchitis every year. And I was like, huh, that's weird.

Oh, lucky me. And I never put it together that that was because I stopped getting it once I stopped working at the grocery store. — Oh, yeah, sure. — Once I stopped being face-to-face person-to-person with 10,000 people a day for every day of the week. — Yeah, that makes sense. This is a little bit not that, but sure. — I think the news said yesterday that we are at two. Number two was discovered yesterday.

— In our local area. — And the city, known as Monterey. Actually, they said Quebec. They said number two in Quebec, so that is a 100% increase from one. — One's up at the Jewish General in the isolation room or whatever. And the other is in the Monterey region, which is where I used to live. They got back from a cruise. — So, yeah, that's where we're at.

— Hey, man, I'll be real. I'm honestly not too worried about it. And if I got it, I'd totally be fine because I'm fucking young and strong and obviously the peak of physical fitness. But the people in my close proximity would die instantly, so I can't have that. — Fair enough. — Man, eating these carrots on the podcast was a great idea. Oh, yeah, go for it. These are such delicious carrots.

All of you guys should have some carrots at home. — Did you just OK someone to turn on a blender? — Yeah, pretty much. — OK. — Well, you don't know what's happening here. Anything could be happening. — You know, that's kind of the problem, actually. That's kind of the problem, but that's fine.

That's fine. — My dick could be out just below camera. You can't stop that. Yeah, below camera. — Twitch can stop that very quickly. — Very, very quickly. All right, listen. This is an audio podcast, after all.

— Ostensibly. — So why don't you talk to me about your week? — Yo, dude, did you play World of Horror? — Not yet. — Dude, it's fucking incredible. It's absolutely fucking awesome. — I hear a lot of good things about it, and I've gotten it recommended enough that I do intend to take a look at it, but I just have not done so yet.

— It is a one-person game made by some chap or possibly lady. I'm not sure their name is kind of unisex and Polish out in Poland. And it is a old-timey, 1980s adventure game roguelike based on Lovecraft and Junji Ito. The art style looks pretty sick. It looks like... I assume the whole thing is black and white and hand-drawn, right? — So, the whole game is black and white. You have graphics options to choose between one bit or two bit.

Do you want to have shading at all of any kind? If so... Oh, wow, look at the graphics. You actually have... It feels like 50 different palettes. It feels like you can have everything from red, bright, shocking reds to blue or all these different weird palettes. — The current one that I'm the options. — Oh, yeah, you just go on the options and go to the palette button and just hit left or right,

or it asks you when you start a game. I'm currently using one called Mondo, which is like a newspaper kind of yellowy with like red background. — It's almost freaking out. — Oh, yeah, totally. That's our special guest. — Okay. — Oh, don't apologize, Elmo. It's fine. I knew he was going to do this.

That's a value. That's a value add. What a good cat. It sounds like a human baby crying, but I'm not Xbox Live Man drowning my baby in the background. — No, it sounds like a cat. — This baby is overweight and not drowning. But anyway, World of Horror... — World of Horror. — It's so fucking fantastic.

The UI is a mess. It's an actual nightmare. 100% mouse-driven. I don't think there's a single keyboard command in the entire game. — That's nice because I like the ability to lean back and kind of like one-arm it. — The only problem with that is that there are a lot of things where you're going to be like attacking, and you go click, click, I want to prep the attack, then attack, then prep the attack, then attack, then launch, and it's just, there's a lot of downtime. It's in early access, but even in its early access state,

it is so high-quality and so polished. — It's early access. — It's at 0.92, 0.11, and it's getting updated every couple of days. The next patch to come out will be the one that enables mod support, and mod support in that game is basically there are event packs. So you'll, say, turn on the World of Horror base game, and the World of Horror base game contains 100 event cards that can play in various locations, and the next patch will come out, and you'll be able to make card packs, essentially, or event packs,

so that you could just add more to the World of Horror. You could do your own, like, different type of thing. — And think of it as adding event cards to, like, a board game. — But they add content to the actual video game. — Yeah, and you would go and customize. — Which is what genre? — It is a roguelike. It is a roguelike, a roguelake, excuse me, a roguelike adventure game.

— Do five mysteries, of which there, I want to say, 15, randomized, get to the lighthouse, stop the Elder God from rising again. — And cards add... — Well, I'm calling them cards. They're just event packs. There's currently, I think, 140 events in the game, but considering you can make events that are just text, they don't need any art. Like, once the mod support comes out, people will be able to make, like, giant content packs that have, like, 100 different things.

Like, hey, do you want to recreate the entirety of Uzumaki in a, like, adventure game, choose your own adventure style? Like, go for it. — Yeah, interesting. Okay, that sounds a lot like a board game I picked up for Table Lords. I haven't played it yet, but yeah, the trail on House on Haunted Hill. — It is very cool. — The trail at the House on the Hill is, like,

it was kind of described in a similar manner to what you're saying. — It's really, really clearly modeled after those games. — Okay. — It's fucking, it's incredible. It's what I've been blowing most of my week on. I've beaten it with almost every character. I've beaten it on almost every background, which are stuff like, you know, you're either haunted by the cult or your frail

or you have a curse that kills all your allies if they join your party but you start with extra money, et cetera. — What's the closest thing it resembles as a platformer? — Darkest Dungeon, if it was a adventure game. — I mean, does it feel blasphemous? Does it feel like Dead Cells? — No, it's an adventure game. — Rogue Galaxy?

— Woolly, it's— — Sorry, sorry. Okay, wait. It is not— sorry, I thought you said action. All right. — No, Woolly, it's an adventure game. You're clicking on text boxes and— — Point-and-click adventure.

— Yeah, point-and-click adventure. Combat is like old school, like Shin Megami Tensei, where there's a giant person's head on the screen. — Oh, okay, okay, okay, okay. All right, never mind. Okay. Oh, by the way, I had a joke ready for the beginning of the podcast and I forgot to say it.

— Hey, everyone, welcome to iTunes, number two video game podcast in the U.S. Hey, we're going to be celebrating that by literally phoning it in from now on. Ha, ha, ha, ha. No, just for timing. — We've— yeah, that's super cool. — We've been— we've been one before.

— All right, now that we're on top, just give up. — We've been— we've been higher. But that's pretty good. — Well, you sound exhausted. Did Spring Forward kick your ass? — No, I'm okay. — I don't like Spring Forward, I don't care for it. — Yeah, you lose the hour.

— I don't like it. — Everything— everything gets darker faster, which, you know, like, I get it, you lose precious daytime, but also, like, I've learned to, like, be productive at night, so I kind of don't mind that much. I feel like, you know, like, the quicker we get over— we get this day over with,

the faster we can start nighttime, and the more we can have that nighttime working feeling. — I'm not a big fan of being hour-closer to the Europeans. The increased temporal proximity to the Europeans makes me uncomfortable. — Because as we know, Europeans smell. — But it's like, if the daytime is going to be shitty and gray and wintery, then, like, who cares about that hour?

It's a— it's a shitty hour anyway. — Yeah, I just don't like how it works. — It's not an— if it was an hour of summer, if it was an hour of nice, you know, cool wind and breeze and, like, lounging outside, then cool, but it's not. It's a shitty, slushy, frozen gray hour that we're losing, so fuck that hour.

— That hour of each hit. — I think the worst part about swing forward is the— like, because we're meanier up super late, right? — What are you playing? — I'm playing Final Fantasy. — What are you playing? — Are you playing— you're playing Final Fantasy XIV right now. — Yeah, I'm sorry. Does that offend you? — You know what? You know what? No.

No, it doesn't. Have at it. How's your— how's your fucking raid going? — Raid. I'm doing daily shit. I'm not even looking at the screen. — Daily's. Okay. That's great. — Yeah. I'm flowing it in, man. Go whole hog. What?

Showed on screen. You people are assholes. This is an audio podcast. — All right. Well, um, while you do that, forgive me while I get my tepid on, because— — Oh, this is good. I like this. — I got— I got— I'm back in championship rank, and— — Dude, you keep flying right the fuck back up there every time. — Yeah, I just— I can't get— I see—

So my ranking, I got to— I got to 985 world. So 985 in ranking in total is not that bad, but I can't— I can't get higher than that. It's pretty fucking hard to crack that top 500, so— — Well, I mean, you could just, like— — Let's see what we can do. — You could just say, hey, man, hey, top 1,000 teppin' players, let's all have a big party,

and then you go and smash their kneecaps with little hammers. — See, and then the problem— the problem is that, like, you log back in, and then that number changes, because as people, like, start to move and shift around in the rankings, you're in that top 1,000, but then you get pushed back down again. And now zero came out, and zero is a motherfucker, so, you know, it's tricky.

— Does that mean that every single time you log in, you're gonna log in, and it's gonna be like, hey, congrats, you lost 15 ranks? — Yeah, well, because the numbers are shifting, so whatever you get to is that, you know, you're still, like, ranked in the entire fucking thing, so it is what it is, you know. They changed the meta, now Chun-Li has a Yan—

her Yan is better, and it does a lot of Yan meta decks that are fucking annoying to fight, so it is what it is, it's fine. — I can't, like, listening to the phrase, Yan meta deck come out of your mouth is the most acid-trip fucking nightmare that— so I have a question about Tevin. — Yeah, go for it.

— And you might or may not be able to answer this, because you said they changed the meta. — They changed the meta every season. Generally, when a new character comes out, it'll end up re-balancing things because they introduced a new mechanic or something like that, like Akuma came out and he introduced Ascended,

Ascending to the meta, so it gets a little bit harder to do shit. — So I guess my question is mainly about the phrasing. Is it the kind of thing, because games either come out and they either change the meta on purpose, or the meta happens to change? — It's deliberate. They're paying attention to it.

They're definitely paying attention to it, because people are complaining about, you know, certain things being too hard to fight, and they kind of, like, introduce a new mechanic that will oftentimes, like, make it easier to deal with the currently too strong thing, but then also add an aspect to it where it's like— let's imagine if you played a version of—

if you used any analogy for, like, any genre that has PVP in it, imagine if an entirely new mechanic started to exist that didn't exist before. — Yeah. — You'd have to now put that into consideration into whatever strategy you planned for. — Oh, man, that's an off-medic deck, but—

— If there was a meter that didn't exist— — It wins every time. Oh, my God. — Yeah. — If there was a meter that didn't exist before, then it wouldn't— you know, whatever you were planning on with your meta originally,

whatever your game plan was, it's not going to work. So Akuma comes out, right? — Mm-hmm. — And he adds a mechanic where when someone puts a card down, they can put a card down on top of there. I just want to just beat Akuma. Fuck you. — Congratulations.

— Go back. — Is that a human being, I assume? — And then he— basically, there's things in the game where you can fuck someone over by having them stick a character in a slot, and then, like, you can use Fly to attack past that slot and directly hurt the hero.

— Mm-hmm. — And all kinds of shit. And then Akuma can, like, overwrite and kill any of his units by dropping a unit on top of it. And that allows a lot of people's strategies and setups for whatever they're fighting to change and fucks up a lot of shit. So, you know, that's what's up.

That's what's up. It does change, and it's intended, I think. I think everything's intended at this point. — I think it's fascinating. — Especially when they post on Twitter, like, hey, are you annoyed by this? You should use this to counter it. — Okay, that's not just—

because that actually segues into what I was thinking of, which is there's a difference between them changing the meta and the meta changing, and then there's the third option, which is prescribing a new meta. — Okay. — Which is, like, hey, hey, that thing was really strong last season.

What if you did this instead, and just literally telling people what the new hotness is? — Ah. — It's funny because I play 14 in Destiny, right? — You mind if I do my draws right now? You mind if I do my draws? — Yeah, do your draws. — I'll do my draws.

— I don't know what that means. — I got a bunch of spare tickets so I can see if I'm getting any— I'm like, I like my decks, so I don't mind, you know? — What is that? What does that mean? — So I'm gonna do my draws right here. — Okay, so you're gonna be drawing? — I'm drawing cards.

— Oh, you're drawing cards? — Yeah, yeah. — Like with a pencil? — No, I'm pulling out new cards to add to my shit. — Oh, I see. — Because, you know, I've kind of like— — Who'd you get? — Well, from the looks of it,

I'm seeing Pyron, I'm seeing Mr. X, Rebecca Chambers. — These are good cards. I'm seeing a Monster Hunter thing, I don't know what it is. — There's a lot there. — Oh, there's a Charlie. There's a bunch of new cards that are— how about that? Mr. X probably looks like he's a good card.

Hmm. Oh, there's a zero. — Oh, good. You got zero. You just talking about zero coming out? — Yeah, yeah, there's some decent stuff in here. Ooh, I have a shiny colon. — There's shinies in that game? — There's shinies in this game.

I got a colon, and she's shining. She's super shiny. Yeah, look at her go. How about that? We're going gacha. — Yeah, man. Gambling, hey. Hey, guess— hey.

Gambling. I got Ed. Ed from Street Fighter. So there's that. It's pretty— yeah. The only thing is that, of course, you know, if— hey, if we're doing this, then we're doing this. If we're doing this, then we're doing this, motherfucker.

All right, so yeah, so, so, so— — Tell me about your SSRs, man. — Well, I don't know what that is, but I'll tell you what. I have a deck that I'm happy with, and because I'm happy with that deck, I don't really care about buying new cards ever, so I've got tons of, like, stored free tickets to buy new cards. — Can you burn them down to create, like, dust to create cards you want?

— Yes, exactly, exactly. You can totally— you burn duplicates. — You burn duplicates to create dust for cards. — Well, holy shit, there you go, man. — You know. But, like, the current deck I have gets me all the way to champ every time, and, like, if I get a good look at the draw, I can— I can— I can crush it,

so, like, why would I fuck with that? I think I've achieved pretty solid balance with my current deck. Um, so, the two legendaries I got. One, I got Beautiful Romance, which is Zero and Iris going out onto the date, having a nice time. — Are you serious? — Yeah, that's— that's Zero and Iris hanging out.

— Do you— do you flip that card, and he goes, what am I fighting for? — Well, it gives a random green unit in your hand, or EX pocket, plus 2 HP, and minus 1 MP. So you can spend— you can call them out faster, and they get more life for it. That's a pretty good card. And here's Sherry Birkin.

— Oh my god, which version? — She's wearing a— a— a furry white coat. — Oh, that's a very sick Sherry Birkin. — Fuzzy white coat. She's holding a gun out. — Yeah, that's— — She's— she's an 8-point card, which is way too much. That takes so much time to summon that shit. — That's a— that's—

— That's— that's— — that's— — that's— — that's— — Birkin, by the way. — That's ridiculous. — What'd she do? — Well, she places one mercenary by blood on the field.

— Oh, that's funny. That's really funny. — And when she— when played on the field, she gains one HP for every five seconds. — Yeah, that is— — What is right and what is wrong? Know yourself and know the answers. She no longer had any hesitation about pulling the trigger.

— That's absolutely 100% dead on. — So Sherry becomes some sort of mercenary? — No, she becomes a mutant. — Oh, yeah. — She has— she has straight-up, like, reinstall healing factor in RE6. — Oh, so that's why she gains one HP every five seconds. — Yeah, and the mercenary by blood is the—

is a reference to the fact that she teams up with Jake for her co-op campaign. — Right, right. — Who is Wesker's baby? — What about— — I'm still convinced that was, like, a turkey-based or situation. There's no way someone in Resident Evil would have sex.

That's disgusting. I got Marvin Brenna, and I know who that is. It's Marvin. — I love Marvin. He's great. — So he's a— he's pretty— he's not that special. He's a pretty normal-ass character. But his ability is when he dies, you send two cards from your deck to the graveyard

and deal three damage to a random enemy unit. So right before he dies, he fucking— he does some shit. So there you go. That's the— that's what I'm getting. And a whole lot of other cards in there, you know? — And I wish Hearthstone was Hearthstone, but instead of Hearthstone, it was Teppin'. — You wish Hearthstone had Capcom IPs in it?

— I with— I with the Hoth— what the fuck? I wish that Hearthstone was just a Capcom game, and it was identical, except it was Capcom characters. — Is it— is it that much more fun? — I— I prefer the turn-based thing than the— than the, you know, the— it's kind of like ATB in Teppin', I guess. — Yeah, so it's— it's so weird. It's so, so weird, right?

Because I feel that, like— You got— you know what? You know what? You know what, Pat? You got me. You got me. — How so? How'd I get you? — I was— I was giving you the shit, and I was saying, fine, fuck it, and I pulled out my Teppin', and now I'm actually talking about Teppin'. I was like, if you want to phone it in,

if you want to do the big phone-ins, then we phone in, and whatever, eventually intending to swerve back. But now you got me talking about Teppin'. — This is great. See, the— the fun thing is— — So, fuck you. All right. — I actually have practice playing games during a podcast. Every Clems podcast, shy stream,

fuckin' level-clear podcast, every single one of those ever. — Mm-hmm. — I'm playing a game in the background. — Are you? — Absolutely. — How are you listening and engaging and giving, like, decent—

Oh, what? Oh, what? Ah. — What's that? — Nothing much. I thought I just saw a cat fuckin' knock over some water. — Don't worry about it. — Okay. Well... — This is our special guest appearance by Elmo the Cat. He is a wonderful boy, and—

— I hope it— I hope it fucks up your abilities on cooldown. — Dude, I'm just sitting here in a field waiting for a cutipop. — So you actively— you actively do not listen to the podcasts that you guest on. — Oh, of course I do. — And you just chime in at the end of whatever you're saying. — I just— I just play worse.

— You devote bandwidth to— — Well, we do LPs. There should be second nature to you by now, shouldn't it? — You just play worse. — Yeah, just play shit. That's why I'm playing 14. I don't need to play good. — Fair enough. I have a ranking to worry about over here. — Yeah, see, you're playing a real game,

and that's why your brain started to think about the game you were playing. — See, the other— — I can't even see FF14 right now. I'm looking right at the camera. — So what I was— what I was going to say is that the one thing about Teppin that ends up being the, like, that part that I'm like,

I wish they can fix this, is that it is a turn-based card game, but because there are ATB attack lines that give you a couple seconds before every attack goes off, people have a very— a very key part of this game is waiting until the frame before you can— you're about to hit, and making your attack hurt more. — Yeah. — Right? — You mentioned this the last time you brought it up.

— Exactly. And then what'll happen there is by doing it at that moment, whatever the person was supposed to do, they can't. If they had a card ready to defend you, you've removed that ability from them because they can't possibly squeeze it in. You know, so there's times when an ability is starting up, and I'm literally got my phone sliding my finger

from the deck to the board, just rubbing it as hard as possible to get my defensive card played in the space between the attack about to hit and the actual contact point. — So would you say that you're a— you're monster-mon-peacing your cards in? — Literally, literally. And that is like— that should not be part of a turn-based card game,

where you're out playing with forethought and strategy. — Yeah, that's 100%. Like, they're a hundred— to specifically differentiate themselves from Hearthstone. — Yeah. — Because if you took that away, it would just be Hearthstone. — Okay. Where there's just— like, as soon as you play it, it does the effect, and that's it.

— Yeah. — And then— — You have a minute to play your card, and you play your card, and it's a static turn. One, one, one, one. — And then at the end of the turn, an attack occurs. — Pretty much, yeah. — Okay.

Because, yeah, the thing with this is that, like, there's animations, like, when you do a super, where it doesn't cost you any mana to do it, but it costs you, like, your super meter or whatever, but it still interrupts the game, and it means if you had a card floating ready to place, it drops back into your deck. So there's little things where people are basically exploiting.

— Oh, that's— ooh! — Yeah, so you can grab a card, and you can float it over the slot you want to put it in and wait for it— wait for the cooldown to— as soon as it finishes, then you just let go, right? But if that— if someone does a big super, so, like, Morrigan does her, like, you know, a Shadowblade or whatever,

then it plays a cutscene, and then the card that was floating drops back to the bottom of the screen, and you're like, well, that takes an extra second, which means I can't play it, which means I got fucked. And everyone at top level, everyone in that top thousand, is doing that all the time. A key part of winning at this game is fucking the person

into not being able to play the card that they were going to play. — I think the funniest thing about that is that at that point, it might as well be turn-based. — At that point. — Yeah. — But, like, it's like, unless they deliberately wanted this strategy to be a part of it, you know? — Mm-hmm.

— And what it also— — I'm sure they did. — Yeah. — And what that also does is it makes it so that, like, you can have characters that have things like haste, where they attack faster, and like, like, Heavenly kicks Chun-Li, can attack, like, twice in the span of time that the normal character can attack, so.

— Of course you can. — Yeah. Anyway. So, fine. Tepin on the podcast it is, then. — Why did you, uh... Why were you so enamored with Tepin once more? — Anyway, play War of the Horror, for real.

— Yeah, I will. — It's fucking incredible. It's just super, super good. — It's a roguelike, but... Does that mean that there's a true end? — Uh, the true end is you, uh... is you make it all the way up to the top of the lighthouse. And there are a couple alternate endings.

The main way that they do it is that... So, the structure or flow of the game is you get given five random mysteries to solve, and they're all literations, so they'll be, like, vicious verses of a... of a vigil, or a rotten report of Rancid Raman. And each of those little mini-stories will have their own separate endings.

So, the Raman one is, like, there's a suspicious Raman joint that might be cursed, so ending one is you just get a vial of the broth, and ending two is you get a vial of the broth, but you also went and dumpster-dived in order to get some meat that they threw out to the lab so it could test it.

So, there's about... there's only, like, two that only have one ending, but most of them have two or three, and there's even, I think, three or four. There's no super ending. There is, but it's bordering on impossible to get. It's a Silent Hill, like, UFO dog ending kind of thing. Okay, okay.

Because, like, I've been playing more Bumbo, and that's a game where, like, every character has their own ending, and then you beat it twice with everybody to unlock stuff, and then, like, I think there's, like, a final, like, sort of ending, and then there's, like, little bits of, like, Isaac Lore and shit like that. So, yeah, you need an incentive to, like, to bother doing the full replay. Yeah, this one is mainly focused on, like,

the big meta story is get to the lighthouse and climb the lighthouse, and the actual variability is primarily in the investigations, which are the cases. So, there's a bunch of those. There's a macabre memoir of mermaids. There's... I'm noticing a naming convention here.

Yeah, they're all alliterative. They, the, so, or an abnormal account of arms, stuff like that, and 99% of the game is within those adventures. Petred Pud of Pat. You did it. You did it. Like, don't talk about my pud.

I don't like that. Or pud. I gave it a descriptor. No. Okay, well, that's fine. I also didn't watch Castlevania. Yes, I should note that I too did not watch Castlevania. I saw two different people say the exact same thing about it,

and it killed my interest completely. Oh, I didn't have any interest killed. I just simply didn't get around to it yet. It was two different people going, I really wish we could move on to Simon for season four, but it doesn't look like we're going to. And I was like... Great.

Well, I'm okay with that, because as a Castlevania secondary, I really like what's happening in the show, but I definitely would like to see time move forward. Like, Trevor, Seafa, and Alucard's story is over. It's cool that we learn more about what Alucard likes to get inside him, but... Come on, guys.

On to Dracula again. I wonder why... I wonder why they'd be resistant to moving on. Or rather, maybe it's just a matter of like, hey, we got a cast of people, and they're all... You know, we haven't watched it yet, so I don't fucking know. I think the main deal is... If it seems like they're sticking around,

then it's like, hey, we have a thing here, we have the characters and the voice actors, and everything's good, so let's just re-up it, you know? I think it's because Castlevania III has a big ensemble cast, and Castlevania I has Simon and Dracula. It's also like a phenomenal show, you know? But yeah, I definitely imagine Castlevania fans are going to want to see the jump, and I want to see the jump as we discussed last time,

but I definitely just need to get around to this. I don't see this as killing the desire to watch the show. I think that's crazy, especially if it's still a really good season, which a lot of people seem to be implying that it ends on a crazy good note. Where's Dracula at? Whenever Dracula's not resurrected or being killed, I want to know where is Dracula. He's asleep.

I want to get to the Dark Priest Shaft. I want to hear who they cast us, Soma. Oh, well, I mean, shit, I don't think that's ever going to happen. Yeah. No, it's a bit like waiting to see what Joe 2K will sound like, you know? What is that? Is that how we call him? It's become a bit of a moniker.

That's weird, man. How do you voice act the weird, ditzy, gappy? Well, huh? What do you mean? Yes. Oh, it's hard to fit all of my balls in my pants. It's it's the writing in part eight is like, there's a lot of weird, ditzy sounding talking where everyone is like stretching

their words out and being really just like, yeah. Is it because they're stupid or what? I think I don't know. I don't think it's because they're stupid, but I think it's because they in my brain translated it into Valley Girl. Oh, it translates it into Valley Girl. So like, oh, that's just terrible. There's like, you know, there's gappy there.

And then there's like two other girls that like kind of have that constantly. Not everyone, but there's a but there's definitely one character. That's very, very stupid. Like absolutely decidedly low. I said that guy was mostly bald, but with like a patch of hair. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

The guy who wants to show us on it. Joe shoe, Joe shoe. Yeah. He got Scott. Yeah. The one that eats his own vomit. He's he's a fucking. I mean, we've all been there.

What are you going to do? But it's it's, you know, even his name is. Really like. Joe shoe. Huh? What? It's it's weird. It's weird.

Oh my God. I actually have a vomit story for you, Willie. I'm okay. All right. So I had the most unpleasant throat based experience of my life. Just a few days past. Where I was eating a delicious bowl of chili. I was going to say who was responsible.

I was eating a delicious bowl of chili. I was eating a delicious bowl of chili. Wonderful lady. Peach saliva made for me. It was good as chili. And I took a bite of that chili. And I took a swallow and a cursed bay leaf. A flavor enhancer.

Managed to lodge itself behind my tonsil and jam itself into the back of my palette. Like a Pokemon. Like a Pokemon. Yes. Which caused me to unfortunately start like retching and coughing to near death and vomiting like within seconds of the poor woman starting her stream. It was literally the first thing you could hear was me retching and coughing to death in the background.

Wretched bay leaf, cursed bay leaf. These are terrible, terrible leafs. Now that's similar has happened to me before, but I solved it by gargling. Did you attempt to gargle? Unfortunately, because I have giant, giant tonsils. It was able to jam itself like in one of my tonsiler grooves or some shit in the back and got proper stuck. See what I think happened is I tried to swallow it and then coughed and then the coughing jammed

it into the back of the big ass tonsil. So gargling would only hit the front of the tonsil. And so the end result was you barfed up the lovingly made food. Yes. It was truly a shame, shame. Shame, fuck it. I feel like that's the part where the studio audience is supposed to laugh. You barf up the bento box with the heart on it.

And it's still got the little heart. And you're like, and you, yeah. Like, is it more or less romantic to barf onto the girl who made you the bento box? Onto, onto the person? Yeah. Wow. Because you're giving up of yourself to them. Okay, so anyway, that's not 30 minutes of barf talk.

That's a solid five. Yeah, just five. See guys, we're scaling it down. Is that, is World of Horror the majority of what you did? Geez, I want to say it was. I've been just banging away at that game over and over and over. The game's fucking great. Like, I've been playing, you know, my, my memorcabirs,

or however the fuck you're supposed to pronounce it in addition, but there's nothing new with that shit. It's literally just like, hey, destiny still exists, I guess. I'm looking at my steam list right now. Oh, aha, thank you for asking. I also took a quick gander at AI or I, the Somnium files. Have you seen this? I have totally seen this.

I just didn't, didn't take a look at it like on camera yet, but yes, I've put it, I've bookmarked that shit. It's one of them spike Chunsoft visual novels with the ending flow charts. And more than anything, all I could think of, I played it for about two hours. Like, I didn't, I didn't get very far at all. Like, I just got to the kid's mom's restaurant like super early. And it's just like tons of money for a visual novel, just like lavishly detailed environments and everything is voice acted.

Spike Chunsoft doing the thing. It's the only big budget visual novel game in town. Though, though I will say the localization seems like particularly incredible because the name of the game is a triple pun. It's I love. Yeah. And the name of the person. So it's, it's the AI.

The AI's name is Aiba, which is like a single letter away from partner, I think. Aiba. Yeah. And then there's, it's a story about murders involving eyes. And like, it's, it's a dude. It's, it's like a fucking, it's so bad. And when you talk to your boss in her office, one of the dialogue prompts is, hey, what about it's, it's a, it's a fucking dialogue wheel

where it asks about I, which is you or I, which is the character or I or AI, which is the fucking AI. And they're all pronounced the same. And one of the options is, hey, what about I and she goes, what? I don't get it. Oh, are you trying to make a pun because the word for I and love are the same in Japanese? You're such a dork. And like, I seriously doubt that was actually the dialogue for the Japanese version because

they wouldn't need to have done it. They wouldn't need to call out the fact that it was a different language. I mean, look, it's, it's, it's that same. I'm going to, I'm going to be real and say that like that Death Stranding has lowered my tolerance for Japanese double entendres significantly. What about triple entendres? It has, it has, um, what is, you know what, whatever, uh, when you lose your humanity and then your life bar is just shortened, you just have lower tolerance.

Like you're hollowed out. Yeah. I just, that's it. It's like, I'm not, I'm not able to deal, you know, and, and here's the funny thing. Like that same double entendre, I, I, AI, it's AI, I, it's also eyeball and it's also me, myself and I. Yeah, absolutely. Right.

There's a million sounds you can get there. Um, is used in like, okay. My favorite jam project song is, is called Olympia and there's a part in it where, uh, they go where the, where the lyrics are basically going, uh, I know Olympia, you may know Olympia. Right. And it's saying like, I know it. You may know it, but it's also saying, uh, I like loves Olympia and then dreams Olympia because I know and you may.

So it's awesome. Oh my God. Right. I was doing the Japanese to English double entendre, which was like, oh, that was clever. That was a thing I liked. And, uh, you know, and I feel like that was so long ago and so many strand beaches ago that now when we're hitting it on this thing with the thing, it's like, it's, you know what, it's me.

It's on me. There's nothing wrong with a well-placed one when it's in a good point of conversation. But if you overdo it, right, it's the overdoing it. That is going to fucking make magic wear off. Somnium files a pass on this one because the characters in the, I almost said show the characters in the story are actually going, uh, eyes. Yes. We get it.

I like it's so, it's so fucking bizarre. The, the, the game is like, it almost feels like a fucking, uh, persona light spin off of like dark dreams don't die. Oh, okay. Like it just, it just, it just throws some anime bullshit at you so fast. Like within the first 10 minutes, he's like, I have a robot that lives in my left eye. I lost my memory six years ago. Jesus.

And then, and then that, and then, and then Aiba who is the robot starts talking to him and it's like a little chibi character. But when they dive into the dreamscape, which is Somnium, she turns into a, like a cute anime girl. Of course she does. And it's, and like, and, and like, there's some weird, there's some weird shit where he's like, oh, I can make you do whatever. And the character grins and you can tell from the grin, he's like, I could make this robot

suck my dick. And it's, it's fucking, it's goofballs. It's a fucking weird, weird fucking game. It makes me wonder if like you have these moments as if you're writing whoever's writing this where the premise of the eye that lives in your eye is basically a shower thought that goes, we have a script. Let's write it. Yeah.

I came up with a pun. We have a story. That's all I needed. All I needed was a robot that lived in my left eye and also, hey, guess what? The main character is missing his left eye, but all the murders, they're all missing their left eyes. You know, if you read it properly, the name Josuke Higashikata was waiting for this. There's another Joe in there somewhere.

Apparently the the kanji for Higashikata can be read as Joe, which seems where somewhere in that name. There's another Joe. That seems laughable or some shit. It does. It doesn't. Joe. It doesn't play.

It just doesn't play in our language, but it wasn't made for our language. So this is where we live. This is where we're at. Yeah, but here's the thing. You just got to take that. A lot of these puns are made in our language. A lot of them are. Yeah.

Every in fact, every single one of them is and it got it. And here's the thing. It gets cute when you stretch it into Italian, you know, and you get your your Giorno Giovanna, which, you know, you then have to switch back into his original Japanese name of Haruno Tachi Obana, which is getting lost in the weeds again. But there's a Joe in there. There's a Gio in there. I saw a Gio.

I saw it. Also. Yes. As somebody in the chat pointed out, Diavolo means the devil. Is it? Wow. Yeah. Yeah.

Um, if it's good, I plan to, I want to take a look at eye. I was summarily impressed with the first couple of hours. It is, I guess, I guess the closest I would compare it to is light in basic structure is ace attorney, but instead of courtroom scenes, you have super in depth investigation scenes where you walk around in a dreamscape to unlock people's mind prisons. It's actually really similar to the cell with Jennifer Lopez. It's actually very similar to the cell with Jennifer Lopez. Very similar.

It's the first of these types of games that I can remember ever having direct control of a character. Um, when you're playing as Dante, which is the main character, you get, you're just in, in adventure game text land. But when you're playing as Iba, you can actually walk around like a 3D environment and look at stuff and interact with things. Okay. So when you say adventure, you mean, you mean point and click?

Well, yeah, adventure, not necessarily point and click. Cause I feel like, I feel like adventure on its own is not enough of a genre descriptor for me. So that's why I was a bit confused earlier. Adventure to me is nearly always in reference to like point and click adventure, but not necessarily point and click. Yeah. So a visual novel game where you can control a character and there's more to do than just

pick branches would be an adventure game. Yeah. Yeah. I, I, I feel like it needs more usually narrowing down usually. Cause, uh, I think the worst ever is games that have been labeled action adventure. I like Zelda was back in my old fucking magazines. I think that's the problem. Zelda is labeled as an RPG in half of my magazines, which is outrageous.

That's outrageous. I hate it. So, you know, I would, I would, uh, I would just like specify that a little more and say like point and click adventure, text adventure, whatever. I mean, it's a fucking visual novel. It's a visual novel through and through the end. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Right. You know, it might just be all me. It might just be all me. I feel like, uh, you know, that's just a thing that has been a confusion point for me possibly. Um, but anyway. Yeah. I definitely want to take a look.

Yeah. That's pretty much it for me. Um, though, uh, that was a pretty like, I wouldn't say lackluster, but pretty like slow ass week for Pat, uh, though this week and ongoing is the start. So I thought we had another week before, you know, the, the, the release nightmare. Uh, but Neo two is out this week. Neo two does come out this week. You can create a character.

Uh, so if you guys want to check out more of, of, of me playing, playing video games, you can go to twitch.tv slash Pat stairs at we're going to have, uh, we're going to have fucking resident evil. We're going to have some Neo. What else? What else the fuck am I doing? There's going to be some destiny stuff. I'm going to take a look at black Mesa, which just hit 1.0.

Like, and then next week is the, oh my God. Next week is doom and animal crossing. Holy Jesus. Same day. Oh, too much. Too many video games. Can you imagine if like FF seven remake was coming out like right now? Yeah.

Yeah. Um, absolutely. Fuck that. That like, come on, man. Don't do me like this. FF seven, which I guess we should segue because we both played that demo. Yes, we did. It's really good.

It's very good. It, it was excellent. Um, I really like, I said it before on the podcast when we first saw it, but the changes to the tone of the intro cut scene. So much darling. Appreciate it. Wow. Okay.

Listen, listen, listen. So a lap board with breakfast was just handed over and you're going to need to not, not feast on the microphone. You're going to need to not feast on the microphone. Please. You're going to need to not tell me what to do. I'm an adult. We cannot muckbang the situation.

You can't, you can't stop me. I can actually stop you. Oh, you can't stop. I have the button to stop you. Just keep that distance. Keep the distance while you do your thing. I'll just yell louder. Okay.

Um, I can't. Thank you darling. This is where we are. Your quarantine's awesome. This is where we are. Self quarantining is great because the lady makes you a nice breakfast. It's a nice, it looks like a nice breakfast. It's just, you're also working right now.

Yeah, I'm working it. Okay. Listen, what I was trying to say, what I was trying to say is that, um, my, my impressions of like the changes to that intro cut scene were fantastic. I really like the slight things they, they modify over what was originally like Eris just picking up the flower and then there's a little bit of livestream for you and we zoom out and we see the city. Here's Sephiroth's theme.

A little tiny bitch, tiny. Here's a little bit of urgency. What was that? Right. And then a little, I'm going to get out of this hallway. I'm going to get out of this alleyway. Okay. And then, um, the step, then the flower gets stepped on and like just a

little like, okay. All right. It's the same scene, but just a little bit here and there. And then yes, the little leitmotif moment, um, with the music playing. Right. I'm like, great. Love that touch. Um, when it comes to Barrett, the conversion from Mr. T into Mr. T, Peter

Popoff. Mr. T, the terrorism preacher, Mr. T, televangelist. It's perfect. I love that. It makes absolute perfect sense because it is the most defining moment of Barrett's character, uh, in the original was like him complaining about that fucking pizza keeping us down, man. Right.

And now they just like, Hey, what if he just rants and raves like a crazy person? Well, that's the thing is now, right? You originally had, you had a tough guy, big old, you know, a jet black type. Right. The, but now, um, and, and he was like, he was a party member and he, and he's an eco terrorist and we're doing the thing this time around. It's very easy to see him on a street corner with a bunch of cardboard

hanging off of him, yelling about the Shinra's. It's very easy to see him screaming in people's faces as they go about their work day on a megaphone talking about the fucking corpse. You know, and like, I like that you can feel that energy as he's just basically practicing his street sermon at cloud in the elevator. And it's just like, this dude is like, he's got that black Israel light energy. Oh my God.

That's so specific. He's got that black Israel light energy that specific type. You know, ranting, right? It's like the planet greeds, uh, the planet bleeds green. Like we bleed red, right? Yeah. Yeah. And it's all building up.

And I'm like, what is this building up to? And it's building up to tell me you can't, uh, tell me you can't hear the planet crying out in pain. I know you can. Yeah. And it's like, oh man, that's it. That's the crescendo of the fucking bit of like, like I tell me this, fuck it, I don't need to listen to you.

I'm going to tell you. I hear it. I know what I can tell, you know, and, and, and it's like you, you know, you're trying to just walk out of that subway and get to work. And dear God, don't you dare make eye contact with Barrett. Cause if you make eye contact, he's locking in and he's going, Oh, I see you, ginger buns. You know the planet's crying out.

You know, and he's getting all up in your face. You're like, what do you want? Do you want money? Do you want? What do you want? And he's any, you know, like the planet God damn it. And just, you know, and he's got two or three others with him. He's got fucking bigs and wedge and Jesse standing around just going, yeah,

yeah, tell him. Yeah. So, you know, I think just as important as Barrett's characterization, the total full cell of Barrett's personality is not complete until he starts, you walk out of the elevator and he starts going nuts again and Jesse walks up to cloud and goes, yeah, okay, just, just, just bear with it. Okay. He's, he's cool.

And just like, okay, even other members of the terrorist organization are like, oh, he's, he's on his shit again. He's on. Yeah. Yeah. He's talking about the fucking planet. He's on the soapbox. He's doing it.

You'll let him, you'll let him get started immediately followed by. Hey, cloud, can I smell your dick? Can I get a whiff? Just a, just a, just a hint. Can I just like a sommelier? I'll just, I'll, you know what I mean? Give it to you sideways. It'll be like sideways.

I'll just. Hey, listen, I, I need to talk to Sid to get a rocket to the stratosphere so I can get on top of a cloud. Like it is astonishing how much that girl wants that cloud peen. Yeah. You know, when clouds get full, you know what happens, right? They cry. No precipitation.

You can cloud. God damn it. When the cloud gets full, just, you can just just rain all over. You got a right here. I'm ready for it. Ready for the rain cloud. I have. So it's been a very long time since I've seen a woman so parched.

I have never seen a throat that dry in anything for a long time. They talked in a recent interview about how they're going to do more side quests and like dramatically expand on what happened in Midgar. Yeah. And one of those is you'll go have dinner with Jesse and meet her parents. Oh my God. And I want to come up with a term for this and it's the preemptive twisting of the knife.

Yes. Absolutely. It's like 100% the knife twist practice. We got to practice. And it's, it's like, if you do this, if you go as far as you can down this path, knowing what awaits you at the other side, right? And then you have your like almost like, damn, what a tragedy. Oh, well, at least the real girl showed up now.

Right. Now, like, as soon as it goes down and everybody sees what happens because you know how it goes and then you get the real moment because it's like, OK, but all that preamble aside, here comes Eris and then you cue why do birds suddenly appear? And it's like, OK, well, she got crazy eyes like me, man. Yeah. So it's pretty fucked that you're going to, you're going to do the preemptive

knife twist on a situation that ends in a significant enough knife twist that you got to, and then you got to double down on it, you know. But to be fair, to be fair to Jesse, have you seen Cloud? Yeah, Cloud's hot, dude. Have you seen this perfect, not even like, like the pores of his skin were modeled and we were like laughing about how ridiculous that is. And now it's like, no, I get it. You need to get in there and see his exfoliation.

Cloud's got like a meth queen look going on where he's like all all like gangly, but toned, but pretty still. It is drop whatever you're doing, distractingly hot in a world where people look more realistic. And it's kind of like, yeah, if everyone is not immediately just kind of like swooning and fawning over this fuck, then it would be weird if they didn't. Right. Everybody that's supposed to be attractive in FF seven eventually became that

like Tifa and Aris are like, are your, your, your brunette and brunette alternate. Yeah. Right. High Digger was made handsome. Like High Digger was made handsome. That's true. Right.

So everyone who was meant to just be like a random villain is now on the scale of attractiveness. So those who were already high on that scale due to anime simplification now are meant to become 11s. Anyway, combat feels really good. I really like the, I really like the change, you know, the genre switch. I dig it. Um, you know, making it, making it like similar to 15, but of course like full,

like action, you know, you have a swing button. We talked about that. I think it's hilarious that like the thing that everyone said to do for 15, they did with this. And hey, guess what? It's a massive success. Yeah. Now admit, now let's be real.

You are mindlessly pressing the slash button and occasionally holding it depending on if you're surrounded or not. That's not true at all. Really? There's also a punisher mode. Oh yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

No, definitely. Yeah. I was going to get into that too. Um, I like the idea that, uh, there will be more to that with every character. I like the idea that there will be like a, a, an evolution of like what that basic attacking system is going to look like. And it won't. Um, I don't imagine it's going to get too complex because the core of,

uh, the combat complexity is still going to rely around your ATB actions and casting and managing all that shit. Right. That's the core of the combat. But, um, yes, it would be nice if they continued to add layers like, um, punisher mode and such to everybody. That'd be fun. I think the biggest thing that I noticed with the gameplay is that

switching into punisher mode, uh, acts as a parry. Yes. And the, like you can continue to, well, you have a counter, right? As you, as you, as you're in punisher mode, you, when you block, you get a free counter out of that only for melee attacks. Um, yep. And, um, yeah, as everyone who saw the videos, they saw me fuck up, uh, not casting lightning on the boss properly.

Um, you know, I did the same thing the first time, but all that, but all that aside, I, I definitely, um, I liked what they did with that. I liked, uh, how you kind of, I'm like, okay, I'm thinking about how this is going to work in other bosses context and like in the grand scheme of this game. And I'm seeing those fights getting complex by like new target points popping up and positioning, getting tricky, you know, like there's a lot to do to make those bots fights feel really like four dimensional.

They also like, like substantially expanded on like what just guard scorpion is, right? Cause guard scorpion was attacking us up, right? And then like this, it's like, it's jumping around. Uh, you're going to hit the shield generator. You gotta stagger it, which is the best thing that was in 13 that they brought over the one good thing about the way 13 played was the stagger system. Hmm.

Yeah. Um, no, and I do say, I do say 4d because besides actually positioning and opening up and getting out of the range of attacks before they, they get summoned and, uh, um, you know, uh, uh, hitting weak spots and targeting right things. You're also switching party members actively for situations where it's like time for Barrett to take care of this. You know, like time for him to do the ranged, uh, uh, ranged attack

or time for him to do cure or whatever the case is. Like your, um, your battlefield management is going to get like pretty complex with, um, God, I can only imagine what they're going to do for like the weapon fights, you know? Yeah. So like, well, there were a lot of little itty-bitty things that I noticed, which was like, uh, I was playing mostly as cloud cause God is just his square buttons more fun to hit.

Yeah. And when you're playing as cloud, um, Barrett's like charge attacks aren't nearly as good. Like you can see him doing them in the background, but they aren't like the, the multi-hit bam, bam, bam, bam. It's a much weaker, like blue burst. And it appears to be that whoever you're controlling is going to be responsible for a much greater percentage of the damage.

Also standing still with Barrett and like recharging his shot, you know, it feels like you're like, dammit, you can stand there and do that, or you can switch back to cloud and get some heads in and then come back when Chloe and Ryn Barrett's ready for it again. You know? So there's going to be some back and forth of like, play with cloud until you get braver, switch off to Tifa, build up her meter, yada, yada. And get the staggers, right?

You're targeting staggers. Um, once you get those staggers in, you switch over to, and you do your, your, your limit breaks, you know, um, line of sight matters, right? A lot of things, uh, those, those little turrets in the, in the factory, like they can't hit you unless you're in their line of sight and vice versa. So, um, I didn't notice that. Yeah.

Yeah. So you actually do have to be able to hit it. Um, the geometry of the, of the, of the area you're fighting in makes a difference, you know, especially when you're, if you were with Barrett, you can see like bullets will hit a wall. They'll not hit, you know, they'll hit the back of the thing. They won't hit the actual, uh, part. Um, it also happens to look incredible.

Yeah. Here's another thing. You're going to be hearing those, those familiar themes for much longer now. I feel like you're going to, uh, you're going to be hearing the repetition because like it's just going like the game is a stretched out version of what we had, you know, so like a lot of these things are going to have way more play. Um, I, I fucking love the remixes we've heard so far.

Uh, it would be super awesome. If like, let's say the second game had a different remix of like those bad themes or the boss theme, it would be really cool. I think that so originally I was a little disappointed in the remixes because, um, they don't have, they're not as loud like, uh, in the original like 95% of the, uh, 95% of the, the music as of the mix in general was just the music. And so they were a lot more like a melody base like they came through.

And in this, they're kind of like this background symphonic ambiance. Yeah. There's, it's a score, right? It's a score that is meant to, to lay underneath dialogue and combat sound effects, which is like, yeah, cause now people talk. And they talk shit while they fight, which is great. By the way, when you switch to characters and it's just like, man, you take care of this, you know, it's like, all right, your turn.

You know, it's like fine, I'll do it myself and all that. I'm pretty thrilled with the new, uh, what do you call it? The new, uh, de facto way to include your diagetic final fantasy victory theme. Which is have characters sing it and having Barrett be the one that sings it. Barrett is Prompto is like, oh man. Barrett loves terrorism so much. He loves it. It'd be really cool if when Barrett is not in the party or anyone is,

or there's no one present that would take on that role. Cloud can kind of hum it to himself. Yeah, maybe. That would be funny. There is one thing that I was initially disappointed at. It's like, you know how they, uh, the new twist is that Shinra blows up most of the reactor themselves and causes enormous amounts of damage. You're right.

Um, whereas the original bomb they had just blew it, but you just bent some pipes so that would disable the reactor. So I'd be like, is that, I thought it was like them just going like, oh, we have to tone down the rampant terrorism. It's weird because this is a discussion I'm seeing people have and I've seen two things about it and you played it recently. So you'd have a fresher memory on this than I do. But, um, the idea that like some people are saying, I don't like the change where

Shinra makes it look worse to frame, um, the avalanche. Uh, some people are saying that like, though that that's bad because originally the original meant that like, hey, you did things that you have to say you're questionable and like people did get hurt, but like Barrett is kind of fanatic and thinking it's for the cause. But then I've seen other people saying, no, that's objectively wrong. Um, because the original did have Shinra, uh, uh, framing avalanche and so there's a line of dialogue that Jesse says after you blow it up when you get

back to base, which is, uh, where she goes, I don't understand what happened. It wasn't supposed to blow. I put it in just like, I like the computer told me to the X, but the explosion was way too big. Um, so it was always kind of implied that Shinra might have juiced it a little bit, but, uh, and then later they destroy the sector plate in order to say that, uh, what do you call it? Yeah.

So that was that. Right. That was so it's just, it's just more obvious now. Yeah. That's the thing, right? Is like, it was what I always recalled is that like the second time around is when it becomes the holy fuck. But I guess here they're just setting it up with the first time.

Um, seems like. It's like, listen, guys, terrorism is really bad unless you're responsible in your terrorism. Okay. So, um, oh, excuse me. Is it, excuse me, avalanche, avalanche, avalanche. Right. So when did you say I said avalanche?

What the fuck is that? Um, that's not a word. An avalanche. I don't know. Whatever. Um, uh, so the, the, um, what was I saying? I was saying the, uh, uh, the framing right ends up being interesting because it's like, well, now, even if you did not actually cause this, this, this, uh, you know, this many

innocent people to die with your fucking PETA style animal defense league, whatever, crazy shit, um, your justification and or how you deal with it is going to matter. Right. Like you don't know that it, or like you, you're confused as to what you saw, but like if they think they did it, you know, and if they think that it's like, oh fuck, it wasn't supposed to be like this, but ah, we got to do it. We're doing the right thing. Then that's going to be a different thing versus like, Hey, what the shit that's not

us at all. You know, there's a, there's a line in one of the trailers, uh, that Barrett says, uh, that when they're looking at like, uh, like, uh, what's essentially a child's crib with a steel beam thrown through it. Uh, and they're like, Oh my God. I can't fuck. Oh my God. I can't fucking believe we killed all those babies with the thing.

And Barrett just goes, yeah, we didn't mean for that to happen, but nothing ever worth doing was ever got without sacrifice. So we're going to have to blow up the next one too. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's, see, that's the thing. Right.

Crib on a, on a, on a, on a fucking spike. Yeah. And you're like, Hey man, shit happens, bro. Listen, I love terrorism more than I love kids, said Barrett. Yeah. Which is ironic because he's a terrorist for the children. Um, how do you feel about them saying that, Hey, cloud and advent children is cool, but this cloud is not cool yet, but he's going to try to be.

Uh, I saw, I saw that interview. Um, and I don't believe a word of it. I don't believe a word of it. I think that is a run back on them making advent children and going like, I think cloud should be depressed and cool because cloud is depressed and cool. And then like decades of people going, no, cloud is weird. Everybody loves weird cloud and the little snippets of cloud being actually kind of cool in this demo are great.

And people go, wow, that was cool. In fact, Jesse even goes, wow, that was pretty cool. Um, followed by moments where Barrett asks him how old he is and he says he's one years old because he doesn't understand the question and looks like a fucking stupid dork. Yeah. Um, no, him attempting to be cool and like consciously doing it is of course way more interesting than him just actually being cool. I'm excited for people who are actually going to be playing this like brand new, like totally

nothing because cloud for the first 15 to 25 minutes is cool. He's almost stereotypically anime sword boy cool. And then you get to the point where he screws up that question and you're like, oh, he's not cool. He's a try hard. You know, he's actually a horrible try hard. He flipped off that debris. Oh man.

He flipped it off. He didn't need to. None of the other ones did that. I'll just just kind of jump down. Also like that entire like Sefi Bishi fight in the in in AC is like on falling debris. Yeah. So they're flexing hard, you know, I'm glad that we established that cloud is good at jumping off of falling objects.

Which he is. Good demo. Very good demo makes me excited. Did you try classic mode? I did not even bother once I saw that it was actually just baby easy mode, but with with like turn based. Yeah. So I was telling me like I didn't try it out, but he started like I was wondering it's

like did excuse me. It's like, oh, it's wondering. Did they actually like make this just play like the old game? And it's like, no, it just auto attacks for you. And then it's for babies. And then there's just like decision making. Yeah. I mean, I think, I think that existing is like, it's like that's that's fine because

it's a good decision because it's like, if you know, there's going, Final Fantasy 7 is a very, I don't know if you know this pad, but there's a lot of a lot of people like that game. It's very popular. I am aware that a few people has sung its praises. A couple of people out there have talked about how much they like it. So amongst those people will be those who don't want to play the action game. And so, you know, if they get to to run the the easy automatic, then yeah, go stylish.

Do what you got to do. Do what you got to do. That will be stylish for you. He will. And of course, I eagerly await their ability to build a character that will somehow it will always upset everyone's internal image of the cloud in their head because that cloud is only in your head. And the collective cloud is something that has been debated for the last 23 years.

So 23 years. That's right. Yeah. So so it's going to be very hard to nail it. But if they approximate something that we all just kind of go, I this is not the cloud that I had in my head when I played the game, but I like this guy. God damn it. My cloud is the kind of guy who would walk into a horror house and be too shy to walk

out of a muscle dude gang bang. God damn it. Mm hmm. Mm hmm. That's my cloud. If you end up not getting that cloud, but you get one that you're like this guy's pretty I like him. He's pretty pretty good.

That worked out. Then I'd call it a success. I would say that it's a job was well done, especially because it's a very difficult task to to add to a what was the term he used. I guess it's like self insert character. Mm hmm. Right. It's a difficult task.

So I feel excited to see what they're going to do with this because so far everything else, I feel like they've nailed it. I did not come away from that that demo with any complaints at all, which is kind of shocking because like everyone's laser eye is on this shit. Mm hmm. It couldn't. It like no one's going to be criticized more harshly than whoever fucks up the poster on this one.

See, you know, it's just great. I think the I think the only thing I want to point out is that there is a poster in the metro station about about dumb apples from Crisis Corps. The Benora white apples. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes.

That Angelo and them loved. Mm hmm. Mm hmm. I I would argue that because some folks are saying cloud was never that was never that is in a self insert character. And you know what? Here we go. I'll take the blow up if everyone disagrees with me on this.

I think a lot of people saw cloud as a I want to insert myself character into cloud. Yeah. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. I would I would argue that what I'm what I'm saying is that like while cloud definitely has a lot more individual personality than many actual blank slate protagonists.

Uh huh. I think that every protagonist will be a sort of will every protagonist will have a certain amount of themselves in like in games like that in these old RPGs that we know where they don't get in the way as much. Like there's a lot of games where you can full on take control of let's say, you know, if you take control of a character like Phelps from from a fucking L.A. Noir L.A. Noir, you're like that is a person that is not at all your your your your ability to influence Phelps only lie in the upper and lower limits of his personality.

Yes. Right. And in these in a lot of and a lot of RPGs, especially JRPGs, I feel like there's the cast will have very loud, clear personalities that the main character doesn't the main character is not going to be as loud and as out there as a personality. There will always be room for the avatar element. I always think about Snake and Big Boss and how like they're gravelly soldier mans. They're going up against motherfuckers that like are made out of plants and shoot bees

at their ass. Mm hmm. And it's like it metal gear would be a really different game if you played as the pain. Yeah, it would. But here's the thing about Snake that's actually interesting that I fucking like one of the things that I fell in love with was how while most of the game, especially up front, he's like, OK, infiltrate the base, got it. What's going on over here?

What's that metal gear, right? All that shit. But like as you start getting close further into the game and more towards the end in those Kodak conversations, he starts telling you about like his advice, you know, and he starts giving advice to Merrill and he's talking to Hal and he's, you know, he starts he's giving stuff that's like, oh, that's not just a soldier man. There's there's a person there, you know, he's not just a dumbass question machine, right? You know, and and so I feel that like there's always going to be room for some self insert,

but some characters will have more room than others. You know, whether you want to say Minato, you and Akira, so which whatever. Yeah, whatever you want to go with, you know, like those characters, right, you can always go like, OK, what percentage of them is exists individually and what percentage is just blanks slate for you to they're like 80 20 blank slate, like existing character. I'll take that I would I would also take 85 I would, you know what I mean? I would take 70 I would I would mostly like overwhelmingly blank slate, overwhelmingly blank slate.

What percentage would you give Krono 100 percent, right? I don't think Krono is allowed. I mean, Krono's not allowed to speak. It's not allowed to speak. He's in that in that animated cut scene. He's he's slashing and training and he wipes the sweat off his brow. I would say, you know, I would say the winner of this is like Gordon Freeman, who's like 110 percent blank slate.

Right. He's so blank that it becomes like an in the universe joke. And if you ever go against that, it's going to be a huge moment of impact, right? So so that's that's all it is, right? So, you know, I just want everyone who, you know, disagrees with with the cloud blank slate statement to just understand that I just mean that there's always going to be a an amount of blank slate inserted, and then there will be an amount that is not. And the main character tends to leave room in their personality where other

cast members don't, you know, I would say that the most interesting thing about cloud is how much room he leaves in his personality for other characters. A. And that he's actually much more defined than he appears to be within the mid garb section of the game. Well, yeah, cloud cloud has a certain percentage blank slate. But he has a certain percentage. He sure does. And then he has a certain percent and some something else.

There's a third divider in there. That pie is cut up a little bit more than just twice. Hey, do you remember when Sephiroth threw a materia at you and then a poses away in the in the Nibble High mansion? Fuck, yeah, dude. Dude, there's going to be so much stupid shit. Oh, I love that you can see the materia. Yeah, on the sword.

Can't wait. It's like, are we only going to get two slots then for that buster sword? No. I bet we are because there are you are going to be changing weapons. Yeah, but you're going to see the slots. You're going to see the you know, it's going to be represented. Fucking rad. No complaints.

I agree. I agree. And you know, I'm excited for that video game, man. You know what, like, let's be real, like. You're not allowed to fuck this up, you know, like there's two. It's just too long. It's too much. It's been the remake.

It's been the thing. Here we are looking at it. For years, everyone, the game only took, let's say, three years to develop, right? Which is a totally normal amount of time, right? But it's been in development for over five because the cyber connect version. They got shown off at some point and they went, this is trash. They threw the whole thing out. So I'm way over most highly anticipated remake of all time.

I'd say so. Yeah, I'd say so. Yeah. Yeah, I'd say so. Um, okay. Well, so yeah, I took, I did take a look at that and, uh, that was a part of my week. What else you got going on, man? Well, uh, I'll write off the bat since I, since I brought it up.

I want to heap, I want to heap praises on one Eli Plague of Grypes. I want to why is that? What's a friend of the podcast Eli Plague of Grypes do? Plague of Grypes made a fucking amazing video essay, in my opinion. I was the one about the mass of Gohan. He made a video and it's, it's another plague dragon ball video. And I just love it, man. I really love what he did.

It's, it's, I don't get it though, cause Gohan sucks. It's a, did you watch it? No. Okay. So, so what's going on is basically it's a, it's a, it's just an analysis of, it's an analysis of Gohan, right? And then he also gets into himself a little bit, which is kind of fun. Um, but he really like flexes that like, he knows what the fuck he's talking about

when it comes to storytelling muscle, right? And he talks a bit about how, you know, he's known as the guy that complains about shit and whatever. And there's all that to it. But you know, there's an understanding to be had, which is when you drop the characters, when you drop the Flandrisms, that like it's, there's a, a, an understanding that like you analyze things because you like them. You want to crack open the nut and see what's going on, you know?

And so he breaks down that like, when you look through the timeline of Gohan as a character in Dragon Ball Z, that like he's won the age of a kid watching Dragon Ball on Toonami at the time, it just happens to line up that he'd be the fucking teenage power fantasy character, right? He just, it's not, it wasn't written, um, um, that way. Like in the manga, it was, it was, it was what it was. Goku was the main character, but it just happened that this landed in such a way where it would hit Toonami in that, in that era, right?

And, um, you're watching the, the, the, the, the character, which is like, I don't, he's like, he's like a pacifist. He's like, I don't want to fight this all sucks. Right. And he does a couple of things where you just, uh, you never really quite take, you never really appreciate what his full perspective is on certain things. Right. So one of the really awesome, really, uh, big points that he brings up when

he's breaking it down in the first half of the video is he, he talks about how, uh, Goku is someone who, uh, came to love fighting through a loving bond with Grandpa Gohan as a kid, right? He learned brain damage. Yes. Brain damage, of course. He, he fucking, you know, he took the brain damage, but he came to love it through learning it with a loving grandfather who trained him and taught him.

And then from there, he goes on out on his adventures and all of his friends are made through martial arts. He fights them at a point and then converts them into friends and then they become like, they train together like Krillin and then they train together and then they move on and then they fight the next guy and then they get friends and everything is in that context. That's the language he uses to interact with the world and makes friends with. So it's his favorite thing in the world.

Right. And by the time you fast forward to see how absolutely psychotic it love, he is with fighting to the point where he's willing to risk everything. It's like, he loves it that much and it makes perfect sense. Right. But it's responsible for every positive experience he's ever had in his life. All of them, all of them. You, let's say, now let's run through the Gohan timeline and it's like step one.

It's the reason why he gets kidnapped. It's the reason why some fucking he, he does, he is whatever he is, whatever he wants to be, doesn't matter because his lineage says you're a good fighter. You're good at killing people. That's what you do. Right. And I'm not going to do the full rundown, but he does an amazing job of just breaking down like, like it's the reason why all the bad shit that happens to

you as a kid happens. It's the reason why you have no friends. The only friends you do have is your dad's best friend and he gets fucking killed. And then that other friend is the little Namek kid, Dende, and then he gets fucking killed, right? And then like everything and then like aliens show up and they start killing people and fighting is like, they're like, it's all about them fighting things and killing things and you're a good at this and you're, you don't, whatever you want

in life doesn't matter because you're an alien like them too. And then in the wilderness, he's abandoned and then like the father figure replacement he gets, that guy gets fucking killed and then resurrected and killed again and it goes all the way through the timeline to the point where his own father, when he's staring Frieza in the face, has the big pop off moment when his fucking again, Krillin gets fucking killed and his dad has a moment where he looks at him and says, get out of here, Gohan, or I might kill you too. Right.

Like he's out of control with the rage and it's like, oh my God, Gohan, Gohan, fucking, he hates this shit. It's the worst experience. It's responsible for everything that sucks in his life. I just want to man, I just want to hang out with my girlfriend and be a part time superhero and do sentai poses, man. And it's a really like, it's a really awesome like breakdown of that timeline of just going like, here's the perspective, right?

But this is all in, this is all in like, it's a shodan manga. So it's happening procedurally. It's happening week to week. And, you know, Gohan serves a role, which is just like the kid to the main character that's ultimately just an object that is for ransom. You know, and then eventually like he starts being like kind of just this scared kid that's around, but the potential's in him though. And, you know, and then it goes into some of the stuff about the writing and

the thought process Toriyama has as to like, maybe we can make him a main character, maybe not, whatever. And, you know, and it breaks it all down really, really wonderfully, right? Um, and, you know, I can't recommend it enough, but what Gohan learned a lot of lessons and that enabled him to have the moral fortitude to stand there and watch his girlfriend get beat half to death and go, no, I won't help her. She wanted this. It would be disrespectful of me to, oh, wow, he's really kicking her ass.

Huh? Yeah. And, you know, some folks are saying you're taking like, this is, this is taking Dragon Ball way too seriously. And it's like, no, no, no, like the tone it's delivered in, like you can really understand that like no one is reading extra far into what you're seeing because we know what this is. It's Dragon Ball Z.

It's a fucking fight man manga, you know, but that's not the part that I even bring this video up for because the analysis and the breakdown of Gohan is something that, you know, like a lot of people can do if you can analyze a story and break it down in this way. And I was like, oh, yeah, that's a really interesting thing, right? Like you really get, it's like, when you line it all up, there's a ton of things that are like everything that happens to Gohan as a MacGuffin make him an awful like make him make it awful that like he's forced to keep doing this thing

that he hates, right? What's really good about it is that there's a point where it goes. So let's look at the Sal Saga and then you go into it, it goes into like, you know, that awesome moment we all love that some people like are like, that's the hypest moment in the entire show where you get the one armed Kamehameha with dad behind him, right? Super sick moment visually just like, oh, yeah, there it is, right? And it's like, let's piece together why this whole moment, like when you look at

everything surrounding it, doesn't make sense. And let's break down why it's kind of silly. And he does and like the whole arc has a lot of flaws and problems with it where you break it down and go like, man, there really was a lot of things in this that just they had to switch the villains up more than a couple of times because it was like, no, I can't be that old man in the fat ass. Yeah, I can't be a couple of editors just keeps going like, man, these people suck. This piece sucks.

Make a monster. Make like a goo monster with the tail. You know, and it's like, no, no, can't be a couple of brats. Make it this thing. And then like, OK, that thing's there. But now that's ugly, right? And it's like, make it better. And it's like, no, that, you know, and it just like, that's ugly again.

Yeah, it's like it's going to charge its laser. Make it a safe, make it a safe, like handsome design that is an improved Frieza in some ways. And in in the whole course of events, like the timeline of what what happens to Gohan and what he's doing, where he's just like stuck in a fucking room and he's just standing there going, ah, and then they pull him out. And then Goha, Goku doesn't tell anybody, just throws him in the ring. And then it's a non fight.

It's just a fucking wash the whole time. But then he takes one severe battle damage hit at the last second. Say trying to save Vegeta and then gets ready for the moment. But the 16 had rolls into the frame, right? And then he has that conversation with him about nature and it and it being OK to it being OK to have righteous anger. And there's some people that you can't reason with, right? So the Super Saiyan pop off comes from 16's head having this moment

with Gohan and then getting crushed. And then he fucking points out. He's like, you know, that's the first time that 16 and Gohan have met and that line has no significance to the kid whatsoever, because he might as well have been saying, who are you? Because we, the viewer, have spent time with 16. But Gohan has it and it's like, oh, no, that pop off is based on viewer feelings for 16, not the person in the story.

You know, I just think it's crazy now that I think of it. It's like, hey, Gohan, we're going to have to pull you out of school. Why? We're going to have to throw a life of your a year of your life away so that we can go train for a year so that you can fight this bug man. So can you do it? No, it has to be you. So what? You know, yeah, yeah.

So that so it's like, this is all very flawed, right? And I was like, God damn, now here's the thing, right? Everyone is going, you're spoiling the video, Willie. What's the point now? I don't have to watch it. Well, you can listen to Eli's sexy ass Kentucky voice wrong. I'm still not at the reason why you should watch this fucking video. The reason why you should watch it, in my opinion, is because after

what I just explained is put out there, he proposes a rewrite of that arc. And fucking hell. And I don't I hate being hyperbolic about things, but fucking hell. Is his rewrite so much better than what we got? And it's like, that's why this dude gets to talk about this stuff, right? I thought he got to talk about that stuff because he has a YouTube channel and a microphone in front of his face. Well, like, yeah, he totally.

Yeah, that's all it takes. He proposes a rewrite that, like. It actually like while just walking through it and going anyway. So let's imagine this happens and then that happens and then this. And that's how it is, right? It's like, and then we cut to some footage and he just breaking it down and like going through it. I'm like, yeah, OK, I follow. OK.

And it actually like got me like it really had an impact that I felt in just talking about a hypothetical version of the story. And I loved it. I really loved it. And I feel like like that version that he proposed in his the little rewritten bit would have made Gohan my favorite character in the entire series. If things float out that way, you know, see, this is how fanfiction happens. It is. It is. This is somebody goes.

It sure would help this character if this happens. So will he spoiling the video? No, fuck off. Listen to me. Go watch that. That. Well, I don't need to now. Now I know that the whole video is about a rewrite. Yeah. No, I don't need to watch that. But half the video, half the video is an analysis describing what I in better detail, what I just talked about with why it doesn't work.

And then the last half is here's what would have worked. And here's what would have worked is fucking choice. It's super good. I have an idea for Gohan rewrite. And so I'll leave it there because I don't want to go into the details of what he proposes, because then, yeah, enjoy that in the video. And then maybe next week or something, I'll talk about, like, the actual things that that like the actual propositions and why they're better and what works

and what doesn't. But it's like that arc really could have been something. So I really want to give a huge shout out. Like, go fucking watch the masks of go the masks of Gohan, I believe it's called on Plague of Grypes's YouTube channel, 50 minutes. So, you know, I, I think that Gohan's many masks. Gohan's many, I think that during the cell games, Gohan should have turned to his dad and been like, this is stupid. And then him and sell should have kissed.

Well, yeah, if you disagree, if you think I overblown it, if you don't think it's as good as I said, that's cool. That's all right. Some, you know, some people will will not find that. Some people will. I'm just talking about what I think. And I think I really like it. And I think you might really like it.

So if in case you haven't seen it yet, go check out Gohan's many masks on Plague of Grypes's channel. Okay, hold on. I'm going to look at a Gohan mask. You can get a, where can you get, oh, it's a mask of like a Fox thing. Yeah. In Dragon Ball Xenoverse 2. I'm a god, I feel like a beaten dog.

I feel like anytime I, anytime I say something I like, I have to qualify it with, but you might not like it and that's okay. Because I'll just, I know, I just don't do that. I know, I know, but it's just conditioning of years of, nah, that sucks. And you're like, all right, it, you know, everything that you like does sucks and everything that I like is not sucks. Well, then I'm sorry that we don't share the same opinions. And I hope that we can agree on other things.

I think that the fact that we don't share the same opinions is sucks. Um, it's, it's, uh, it's a really good video. So that's, that's one thing I did with the week. Um, something else that I did was, uh, I watched Toy Story 4. Oh, okay. How's that? Have you seen Toy Story 3? I have, I have seen Toy Story 3.

Have you seen Toy Story 4? I have not. Okay. I was in the camp going, why would you go back? Why would you need a Toy Story 4? I don't think you need to do this. Then I watched and I went, oh, this is very good. It makes sense.

I'm glad you did this. I would like, you know, it's, it's like you, you're questioning why this exists until you see it. And then you go, no, okay, that's, that's, yeah, they, it was good. It was good. I'm really, uh, I really hope this, it's done for reals this time. Um, I would say this, right? At first glance, you're going to walk out of there going, oh man, like,

it's going to make you feel, you're going to have feels, right? As the Toy Story makes you have feels. That's what it does. Yes. Yes. But you're going to walk out of there probably going like, you know, like it was good, like it didn't hit me as hard as three, but it was good. And I don't think much is going to beat that moment in three where they're

all holding hands and like now we can all die. Both are fine movies, but there's one scene in three. No, you don't forget the rest of three. The rest of three is fine. There's one moment that's so dark and horrifying, that is so brutal to any child balling in that theater. The fucking incinerator scene in three, it broke all of us. Don't worry, buddy.

I'll be here with you when you burn to death horribly. What do we do? Uh, and you just have a look. All you have is a look. I rewatch that scene, right? That fucking right now, that fucking scene. All you have is a look of just, yep. Well, here it is.

It's been a pleasure, you know, and it's so fucking brutal and over the top. And like it is the most like it's like, it's like borderline manipulative evil shit to do to kids. I remember kids crying about Optimus Prime dying in Transformers, the fucking movie causing them to edit G.I. Joe so that Duke lives and man in a world where that was too much for kids. You do the fucking Toy Story three incinerator scene to them. Are you mad?

We're all scarred by that. And that's why we're going to always think of that as like, yeah, no, that thing though. And it's like, yeah, man, you're not going to top that. That was brutal. The rest of the movies, the rest of the movie, very comparable to four and and great, really fun, entertaining, you know, and lots of little lots of heartfelt moments.

They fucking get super ready to die. It's bad. It's traumatizing. So all that to say, if you remove what is trauma from the equation, both movies, comparably good to each other. But then you insert that bullshit and you go, yeah, fucking nothing. Nothing's going to line up with that. Oh, God, Toy Story three.

Could you imagine? Could you imagine, like, you know, the, you know, the loud, angry, like, you know, the Russian guy salute crying. Yeah. That like that. It's not children like holding their it's not tears with mouth closed. It is mouth open and the edges of the frame are fucking blurred. Speed blurred vignette.

Oh, the Yammer around the edge of the screen as you. Because it's so rough. Oh, what's that guy from from is a Kira? Is a Kira from the seed Kira? That's that's really on point. I it's it's in my outro every day. Oh, it is Yammer. Oh, yeah, it's the duck.

It's it's the dog being spread by water. It's Jesse Pinkman. He can't keep getting away with the speed blurs around the edge of your frame, guys. All right. Um, it means the thing you're looking at is intense. Turn it red. Put a glowing effect on it. It's all in the red eyes.

Toy Story 4 is very good. And the the. Of course, it, you know, you saw the trailer, I'm sure, right? Of the oh, yeah, I did. Yeah. So it's like the fucking the stick, the stick. The sport, the fucking is sport comes alive. It's like you put a fucking put a face on it and you wrap.

You wrap a pipe cleaner around it and now it's alive. It's just like, yeah, there's a there's a there's a background thought. Yeah, yeah, it is just it's a foreground thought. It's not a background thought. It's a foreground thought. Why am I alive? It's great. Oh, God, I live the nightmare.

It's great. Um, OK, so. So that's what I watched. And then like, yeah, it's a quick shout out to some games I played. So I played something that I was I was teasing a little bit earlier. Went through it. We've been playing Sonic Robo Blast 2. What the fuck is that?

Sonic Robo Blast 2 is the best 3D Sonic game. All right, let's it is a fan made game from already fucking. Decade ago. And here's the important part. It is a sprite that is running on a 3D background. It's a doom mod. But the world picture a world that is a Mega Man legends like world. Very blocky textures that are vibrant and life lively that are very much

resembling Sonic 2, Sonic 3, Sonic 1, all the old games on the Genesis has all that life. It has all that life to it. But then the character running around the map in 3D is 2D sprite. And that 2D sprite, you can rotate all around and see. There's a lot of different accesses for this fucking sprite magic. You can fully run through that world. And here's why.

Here's the thing about it, right? It's a work in progress. It took them I took them years to get it looking that good. But that to me represents an alternate timeline for early 3D platforming that we didn't get. You're watching a boss fight and I'm like incredibly impressed at the air control you have, which negates the need for like the light speed dash homing attack that every 3D Sonic game has to have.

So in this case, the homing attack is it's not a homing attack. It's just a dash forward, but it only dashes in the direction the camera is facing. It never dashes away. Line it up and then you dash. Yes, right. Way better. And then knuckles flies in the direction the camera is facing.

Everything is kind of like that like that, right? This game represents an alternate pathway in 3D platforming that never happened. We could have seen the earliest 3D platformers as from the N64 and the Dreamcast days. We could have seen games that had sprites on a vibrant 3D world instead of going all the way into adventure or like early bad 3D that ages poorly, you know, like, like thank God

that Super Mario 64 is such a good game on its fundamentals. Yeah. Because, you know, that game's like a miracle. It fundamentally has such strong design principles that it outshines the era of 3D it comes from, right? And I would say Ocarina of Time also has that magic about it. I'd say so. I would absolutely say so. Where it's like you come from an era of awful, horribly dated garbage 3D.

Yeah, you could get a fucking Legend of Zelda Ocarina of Time or you could occasionally get something like a fucking Castlevania 64. Sure, exactly, right? Like fucking God, damn it. Ocarina and, you know, 60 and Mario, like with the quality of their game design outshining the era they come from. But if we went this route, it would have been a much clearer link to the 16 bit era,

but also embracing like 3D possibilities. It's more of a half step, but it looks so good. Well, considering a full step got us garbage like Sonic Adventure. That's fine. If we went in this direction instead of Sonic Adventure, it would have been great because eventually when we would go to Sonic Adventure, we wouldn't like, you know what I mean? It wouldn't have been so creepy and weird with some of their like

the way their mouth moves and the like some of the technical, like weird shit about it, despite the fact that like some parts, some parts still are still very cool. We love that soundtrack. We love some of the goofy. You love that you love to hate it in some cases. But there's some shit that's so fucking turbo jank that you're like, man, if we don't think we instead.

I don't think we necessarily need to get to Sonic Adventure. No, I think it's I think I think 3D Sonic has been a total wash. I disagree, but I do think that Sonic Robo Blast represents an alternate timeline. A Sonic Robo Blast 2, excuse me. And it is, to me, the best Sonic 3D game just because it very likely hits you. It hits you like those Genesis games.

And the music, guess what? Fucking incredible soundtrack. The amount of love put into this over that decade I've been describing. Tons of characters you can play as tons of secrets. Huge maps, right? So the maps are massive. And this is my only like flaw. I've been watching I've been watching like a video the whole time.

And it's this like Canyon map and it's fucking gigantic. So the biggest flaw with the game is actually the fact that like so here's the thing, you can play it with mouse and keyboard, right? It's kind of how the default controls are set up. If you play with two with a stick, then you have like twin sticks. And then as a result, you're getting you're constantly moving the camera because you're moving that fast and you have to turn the camera a lot. So jump and and attack are on your bumpers, of course.

So that it ends up being a bumper controlled game, right? So you get used to the speed you're moving at. And you get you eventually get good at fine tuning some of your cornering and shit. However, the maps are so big because they're meant to be traversable by every type of character. So Sonic on his own, who's can only run and jump, tails who can fly and knuckles who can climb and glide.

And then and then other unlockables that cannot do either of those things. All have to be able to make it through. So every map has tons of pathways leading to the final goal. And they're so big that it's insanely easy to get lost. Very easy, right? Playing through a map at the for the first time, you will hit a checkpoint. And what's nice about it is every time you make your way to a checkpoint, let's say you hit checkpoint three.

If all the characters had checkpoints to in different areas of the map, but we get to that third one, those are all lit up. So you never if you fantastic, you encounter a checkpoint that is already lit up. It means you didn't you weren't you didn't go here, but you don't have to. This is backwards, right? But there's still secrets back there. There's still things to uncover. There's still walls that you can break in powerups to get and collectibles.

So there's still if you're trying to actually scrape every area of a level, you fucking will have a hard time doing so. So that is that is a bit of the issue. And then the second thing, which is a bit more minor is the way that it's set up is you run into rings, you collect rings in the same way as you do in old Sonic games. But in this case, because they're in 3D space, the formations are very tricky to perfectly very specific.

I the the the best analogy I can come up for it is remember in Star Fox when Peppy told you to stay in formation. Yeah, remember how fucking hard that was because the outline is like perfectly lined up with the other group with the rest of the group and you're just doing your best. It's such a ridiculous like ask of the player to stay in formation that like you just eventually are like, OK, look, man, the best I can do is not be in formation, but turn and roll when you guys turn and roll.

So there will be cases where you see a bunch of rings lined up in a perfect curve and you're like, I can't fucking run a perfect curve. We'll get good, man. And there's no lightspeed dash. So just go back, stop and collect them all because you missed four of them, you know. But anyway, the rest of the game is is phenomenal. And it goes places. The levels are just they evolve in a really nice way.

It's a very complete package. You unlock more after you beat it. It's just incredible. It's incredible. And it's fucking free and it's out there. And like it shows you that like, yeah, the Sega fan games have been a thing for a while. Sega encourages their fan games. A lot of them are really good.

Yeah, it's it's a it's a it's the result of, I think, the company officially sanctioning them, you know, and as a result, now you have this. So everyone knows about the cart game because I think that's a more recent thing. This is older and that cart game there's a that was based on this is is is what everyone's like. Yeah, check that out. I'm like, yeah, definitely plan to. But just that adventure game that was from 10 years ago is now

like the best 3D Sonic game period. And one of the most interesting things about this conversation, Willie, is that we've been pretty harsh on the Sonic adventure games because I'm looking at this and just from the footage, I'm like, man, I would way rather play this than either of the Sonic adventure games. You would. And there are some people. Possibly right now.

They're like, why they got a hate on Sonic adventure? They so wrong, right? And the funniest thing about that is that I look at that and I smile because let's take Mothman, for example, friend of the show, art man, Mr. Moth. Yeah, he he loves Sonic adventure, too. He did. But see, now I know that Mothman is an idiot because that game is trash.

And I feel smart as a result. So I love it when people tell me that my opinion is stupid because it allows me to see he was actually the stupid. Listen, you don't have to go. You don't have to delete the whole thing because there's some endearing jank soundtracks. OK, there's some endearing janking and memories with Sonic adventure one and two. However, you don't even have to go into Big The Cat

or the Chow Garden or any of that shit. It's just a game where however you feel about it, you put it next to Sonic Robo Blast, too. And it kind of melts in the sunlight. Yeah, it kind of does the it's kind of a zombie in the sunlight in the face of a game that fucking crushes it like this, that keeps all the 2D charm, all the amazing feelings of like what you love about the sprite art, but now in an open 3D world

where you still feel the speed of 3D like traversal. It just it keeps it all in there, you know, and it also has a cutscene at the beginning and it has a little end and then it has some zones and some boss fights. And then when you collect collectibles instead of the bonus, you know how the bonus game in Sonic where you're running down the fucking on the sphere or down the the the sphere one or the half pipe one, both of them. You know how those mini games are basically just the game you're looking

at? Yeah. So those wouldn't be very special at all, would they? No, because those ready, those those 3D like half like like games are just the whole game this time. So what do you do? You got to do something extra special for that. Well, in in fucking Sonic Robo Blast, too, the bonus levels are you flying as supersonic knuckles or our tails.

And you're playing nights into dreams. Ah, they're awesome bonus levels. You're flying nights. You're flying, collecting the rings, doing loop-de-loops, spinning, going into the foreground, coming out the background. It's it's it's a it's a it's a flight on rails. But it's such a fun bonus level to throw in there. And then you just go back to the regular game.

Super great, super, super great. You know, it's funny, back in the day, I didn't get a Dreamcast. I wanted one, but I couldn't afford it. My buddy got a Dreamcast and he had Sonic Adventure and he lent it to me out of a week. It's called say Wuhan. Yeah, hey, dude, hey, smart. I'm at home away from your coughing.

The new bless you. Yeah, it's the new bless you. Yeah, but I played Sonic Adventure and I played I rented Reserval Code Veronica. And I beat those games. I 100 percent at Sonic Adventure and I beat Code Veronica. And I was left with this feeling of like, fool, thank God I didn't buy a fucking Dreamcast.

If this is the fucking shit that they're going to be putting out on this thing because, holy shit. Oh, Pat, you know, you how wrong you are because that was a hot console. And you know, not not from the two games I wanted to play on it. Well, from all the rest of the games, which all the rest of the games like Seaman and Bluestinger, which Shenmue, which brings me to my next bit, my next get out.

Get out right here. See this? This is a piece of magic. This I'm holding up is a Hello Kitty Dreamcast. This Hello Kitty Dreamcast, I want to give a huge shout out to Shy City Justin. I want to confirm that is, in fact, correct because he hooked me up when I went to. Shy Town Justin, excuse me.

Shy Town Justin, one of the guys organizing the mystery tournament at Frosty Fostings in Chicago hooked up this Dreamcast. This is a Hello Kitty Dreamcast, but but it's not just a Dreamcast that I, you know, I have a bunch of these lying around the house. Nothing special about that. Here's the deal. When I press this open button, what you will see here, if I hold this forward, I'm just going to describe it for y'all is not a disc tray,

but in fact an SD card. So that combined with an HDMI converter in the back here equals a fucking dream come true cast because now you don't have to fucking worry about anything. So what was the part that would fail on a Dreamcast over time? Is the drive the potential meter, the potential meter, which was right underneath the lens would constantly fail and you would have to crack it open and clean and then readjust it constantly.

And when I had to repair Dreamcasts, it was just it was the first thing to go every single time. The lens was weak and after a couple of years of use, it was just not meant for the long run. It was built in such a way. Bypass that problem. Yes, there's no laser. There's no there's no laser to worry about.

So it took you 15 years, but you finally got 20 years really. Well, my solution has finally got a working Dreamcast. I have a working. I always have a working Dreamcast, you know, I just have a stack of those motherfuckers and that's my solution to the problem. Well, the solution has been found like permanently, which is a yeah, this is modded to fit a nice fucking SD card in and solve all the disc problems that you could possibly have.

The video game consoles should not be limited item consumables. Well, come on, I agree, but the release list of this console is so goddamn strong that I will always need to have one because it's just one of my favorite lists ever and a bunch of those games never got released elsewhere, they never came off of it or they came off of it and even more obscure formats. For example, here's a list of Dreamcast games that suck. Sonic Adventure, Sonic Adventure 2, Shenmue, Seaman, Resident Evil

Code Veronica, Marvel vs. Capcom 2, Starstove, Crazy Taxi. Go on. Jet Set Radio. Ooh, what a stinky Resident Evil 3. JoJo's Bizarre Adventure. Wow, what a bunch of garbage. Trash. Seriously, though, why did CVX and Sonic Adventure have to be the first

games that played for that fucking thing? Doesn't matter. After that came Third Strike, Project Justice, fucking, uh, uh, Tech Romance are dropped after that. You don't get to say Project Justice came. Project Justice never came as far as we're concerned. Project Justice is there, as is Powerstone 1 and 2. And, uh, if you even, if you want to go back and like, check out the fucking

new generation and second impact for shit's end, the giggles, you can go do that and have some fun loading up your double impact. Okay. I need a Dreamcast at all times because it was the Capcom arcade port board. It was the Capcom from the machines to your home board. And, uh, it's where I played Skies of Arcadia. It's, it's, it's where a bunch of these games that like, you know, took a fucking forever to port were for years.

Third Strike was locked on the Dreamcast for years, you know? Anyway, um, I'm happy I got this. This is a, this is a nice problem solver. And, uh, there's some shit on it that I didn't fucking even, like, some shit there I didn't even know about. But, um, you know, and this is not to get into, you know, uh, uh, uh, for the longest while, guess what? Rez was a Dreamcast thing, right?

A cosmic smash was a Dreamcast thing. Icaruga, Dreamcast thing. These is, these are the places you have to go for. What a terrible console. Yeah. Yeah. Listen, I'll admit, it's all because of the controller. It's because of the controller.

All right. Well, the squishy buttons. Plug in a converter. The play virtual on with a PlayStation controller. I wasn't going to plug in a converter back in 1999. Anyway, um, so that's a fucking breather that I really appreciate. And shout outs to Shytown Justin for, for the hookup on that. Apparently, does he make those?

Or did he just acquire one? I, uh, there's a dude who makes them that he, he knows that also, oh, like, does only does a few of them per year, very limited type of thing. Um, all in all, like, yeah, not very easy to acquire type of situation. But, you know, kind of like those, like we like the modded N64 with the HDMI and stuff like that. There's people working on this stuff out there and God bless them because, you know, um, there'd be shit that would be lost forever.

You know, there'd be shit that would be lost forever. Like the fact that like not like, look how, look how, like not even long ago, the, the e shop for the Wii was like, all right, that's gone. There goes, there goes games that are just gone forever. You know, well, unless archivists got in and archived. Oh, oh, that's, hey, you're right. Archivists. But for those, everybody loves archivists, but for those who didn't, goodbye forever

to a bunch of games. Goodbye, muscle March. Goodbye. Oh yeah. What is muscle March? It's a series of YouTube trailers. It's, uh, it's a thing that I tested and it's a Wikipedia article. It's not a video game anymore.

It's gone. Oh, you probably get it from the archive. But that's the point, you know, it's an, it's an official fuckery. Um, so yeah, that's, that's the, the shitty, terrifying side of the digital, the digital realm, the digiverse. Well, I don't know if it's a news article, but there's more shitty, terrifying digital shit that's just hilarious. Doc Lewis's punch out.

Oh my God. That was a thing too. Yeah. Yeah. Anyway, no, well, um, what about which one now? Uh, I was going to make fun of the Stadia later. Oh, uh, no, that wasn't on the docket. So we can, we can.

Okay. So long story short, uh, Jim put out a video talking about like developers, uh, and the deals that Stadia is offering for them. And the deal to cut, to put your game on the Stadia is nothing. We're not going to give you any money or exclusive or marketing. Just do it. Just, just do it. It's a good system though.

Did you see the tweet where they said spell out the, spell out your name using Stadia titles? All right. Yeah. And then it got to the eye and they just had to, and it went shrug emoji. There isn't a single game on the platform that has a eye. Also, there's, uh, I saw people talking about, um, uh, there was a guy named in our subreddit, uh, named Christopher that couldn't start with an O.

There's not a single game with an O either. And I think they might not have a Y either. So they're missing like multiple vowels. So, what the fuck are they thinking? Cue the reply. Like it's the, it's the promo tweet that has the shrug. It's like, the thing itself. Cue the replies with people like, yo, shrug looks like a banger.

Can't wait for that to drop. Like the guy running that Twitter account is like, I'm just going to get paid until they shut this thing down. I came in and did my job. Yeah. Again, I will, I will, I will take my final take on Stadia and maybe I'll bring it back every time it comes up, but it should have just been another project on the Google labs tab.

You click on the Google lab projects and you see all these crazy things they're working on and one of them is some video games that, that fucking stream to your thing and it's, and, and, and that's it. It's a work in progress and maybe one day it'll be a thing, but it's, but that's all it was. You know how they've bought some developers to make exclusive games for the Stadia? They did.

Will those games ever come out at all? Oh, those. Or will the system be canceled before they release? Oh, that's fucking horrible. That's garbage, man. Yeah. What? You know, so before iron galaxy took over K I double fine got bought by

Amazon to do Amazon fire games. Yeah. I don't know what happened there. I, I also don't know what happened. That sucks, man, because there's some developers that, you know, under condition of anonymity, you know, the usual and they were pretty frank. It's like, we don't know if this thing's going to exist in even a year. Not double fine, double helix rather.

Yeah. Yeah, same thing. That's, uh, it's the, um, imagine if the, the, uh, epic game store exclusive deal, which is like, you can't say no, but it's like, you know, it's like, uh, uh, epic game store exclusive deal, which is like, you can't say no, you can't refuse, but then also it kills you. Yeah. And also the whole deal is just, uh, Sweeney coming to your house and going,

come on, it's a fucking death note deal. Come on. It's a death note deal. It's Pandora. It's Pandora. It's, it's street fighter cross-tech in Pandora mode. You're a developer that gets a super charge full of cash and you get bought and then you're like, yeah, infinite super, infinite meter, but if you don't win in

the next 10 seconds, you will die. That's what, that's what it is. It's the fucking Pandora activation, man. Oh God. That sucks, dude. That's a bad fucking deal for folks that got bought out by the stadia situation. Um, anyway, well, so that was, uh, that was, that was the dreamcast. Uh, and, uh, yeah, last little quick bit was we had to get into fighting

games for glory. We had an expert in to come and teach us the fucking ins and outs of Poken. That game got ported to the switch, as you might recall, and, uh, got a couple new characters, they put the Blastoise in it. They put, um, oh God, they put, uh, Aegislash in it. They put, uh, a bunch of new Pokemon and, uh, Poken, yeah, it, uh, you know, just as fun as I remembered, more, more tech than expected. Definitely, definitely like got to see him like, okay, so the tournament

players, this is what they do in this game. Um, it, uh, yeah, I appreciate the idea behind like phase shift modes. Right. That was such an interesting thing where if you remember you would do combos in like the 3d arena mode and then you do enough damage and then it shifts the camera to a 2d fighter mode. That's the weirdest fucking mechanic ever. It is.

And then you do, you do some damage again and then it shifts back to the field, field phase and dual phase, right? And, uh, the way that was kind of set up is it was very weird. And like when you kind of like get to the explanation of it and you kind of see it in action, it's like, okay, it's basically like a way of challenging, um, zoners and like it's a way of kind of like converting the situation into one where zoning is stronger versus one where obviously rush down is stronger. You know, so depending on the goal of your character, it gives you a chance

to excel in the, in the phase that your character works best at and try to keep the game there, you know, so it's a little bit of, um, it's a little bit of a teeter totter in a way, almost like a nidhog, you know, getting my back against the wall, your back against the wall kind of situation where, uh, if you're, if you're, you know, if you're using a fucking rush down character, you're, you want to be in that 2D phase because you have really good setups and moves from there versus if you're using like a fucking, uh, um, uh, Brykson or whatever, then you want to zone and keep them out.

And, uh, yeah, it just like, it adds another layer to the already like pretty simple rock, paper, scissors that the game has going on. That game doesn't have enough characters. It has a lot now, but there's like 650 characters. Yeah. Well, that's the thing. It has a, it has a character select screen. If that's a whole bunch of boxes on it, but the problem is that the IP is Pokemon.

So you can, that can go forever. It's like, I'm not familiar with a grand blue fantasy, right? A grand blue fantasy versus has the same problem. And it's like, there are like 3,500 characters and their bikini versions. Um, you know, the, the, the, the original slot thing we talked about of like, will they all be fighting types? And it's like, well, no, but I'm, there better be a healthy number of fighting types at the very least.

I, uh, I think you got a roster that's pretty, pretty healthy for what the game is. Um, if it were any other IP, it would probably have had less in this case. I don't see them making a poke into, I don't see this really, you know, going anywhere else from where it is at. But the fact that it got freed off of the Wii U, right? And, and treated to some new characters and extra shit is very pleasant. It's nice. It's no law.

It's not a memory of a distant forgotten thing. It is now available and around. And, uh, so there's a really great new gimmick Twitter account that you just reminded me of, it's called poorly aged things. Yes. And one of the ones that I retweeted recently was that guy who can't hold all those lines. Yep.

Um, and he is holding a bunch of Wii U games. And he says, why can't I hold all these amazing exclusives? And it's got Smash, Captain Toad, Wind Waker, Pikmin, Hyrule Warriors, Mario Kart, wonderful 101, Tropical Freeze, Monster Hunter, et cetera, Bayo two on it. And you just look at that. Oh, zombie use on there. And all I can think of is the phrase you just used is that poking was freed from the tyranny of the Wii U, like it was saved because no one wants to even go

through the trouble of plugging that piece of shit in. Yeah, fucking thing sucks. Yeah, it's not, uh, it's not a fun, it's not a fun, it's not a fun plugin. The shackles are broken, ported to a thing that we currently have. And, and I like that, you know, slowly, but surely everything we care about has been making its way over because Nintendo knows. And also, it's a nice way to fucking pepper up that switch library. Yep.

You know, like grab all the other shit that a bunch of you guys missed because you didn't have a Wii U. Hey, try it again. It was good. It's like, it's like a brand new game. It's new to you. Just put a little Nintendo. If you haven't seen it, it's new to you.

Must see TV sticker on it. It's not a rerun. Oh, anyway, so that's, that's what that fucking thing is burned into my mind decades later. Yeah. I haven't seen it is new to me. So yeah, right. Co-Washi, Co-Washi tie.

Yep, that was saved. Xenoblade, all these games are, uh, you got to, you got to unshackle, you got to break the shackles, you know. Anyway, um, so that's pretty much what I did. And, uh, if you would like to see, uh, those adventures as described, I did, uh, I did a full LP of Sonic, uh, Roboblast two. So that'll be woolly versus how long is that game? The first time through, you're going to, it's going to take you a while.

After that, you can do it in a couple of hours. You can do it in like four, three typical Sonic game. But if you're treating it like you should any 3D game, the first time you play it, which is you want to scrape the level for stuff, you can easily spend 45 minutes in each, in each zone. You move very fast. There's a lot of places to go. Um, in some cases, like underwater levels, guess what?

Find that fucking bubble in with a Z axis. Find that bubble spot with a Z axis, motherfucker. Good luck. Yeah. No, I don't want to. Um, or you can just high tail it straight to the goal. If you can fly float or just zip line. So you can, you can speed run that shit easy or take really long.

Um, there is a ginormous castle like level that just fucking goes and goes and goes and, uh, you're like, I had to, I was trying to explore it all and I had to just give up. I had to just give up and move to the move forward. Really? Yeah. You know, and this is like a Sonic. Uh, I was playing as knuckles and this was off camera.

Right. On camera, I just ran through it and did the red, did the run off camera. I was trying to cover this whole area and I'm like, this is like, I don't, it felt like fucking Hyrule field. You know what I mean? Like it was just like, oh my God. But, um, yeah, Sonic Robo Blast, you know, and, uh, yeah, Poken, all that good shit all available coming up on woolly versus on Twitch, a woolly

versus on Twitter on, uh, YouTube. And of course, um, you can follow updates on woolly wolves on Twitter. How about a quick word from a sponsor? Let's do that. Okay. Who do we got sponsoring the podcast? This fine week, woolly. This week, Castle Superbeast is sponsored by.

Manscaped. Yep. So as you may already know, Hey, maybe you're familiar with the sound of, Ow, fuck, shit, bitch, piss balls, cut motherfucker. A nick, my nuts. Damn it. Maybe, maybe you cut yourself shaving. This will surely hurt more when I dip them into the yogurt later.

Don't dip them in the yogurt and don't try to fucking cut yourself. Don't try to shave without something, uh, uh, that can save you from that. Such as manscaped, manscaped. You don't, you got, you got, you got, you don't got to fucking scream and cut yourself all up and then all over the place anymore. You don't got to bleed everywhere. And now you got blood, blood in your underwear. Is that what you want?

You're trying to make an impressive night. You're trying to make a fun, you're trying to have a good time. And, and you didn't even know that when you were shaving, you fucking, you caused a spump. Yeah. And you, you're, you're trying to play it off like, nah, man. It's my sympathy period. You know, and then, and then they're like, is this for you?

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I didn't know that was a parfait. This week, Castle super beast is also sponsored by a way. So, uh, you've, you've probably, you've probably heard me talk about a way in the past, but for those who have not away is quite simply, it's the best goddamn suitcase I've ever used and traveled with. It is a little like it is a, it is a perfect container that has all this tech that I didn't even know I needed in a suitcase. Um, they've got durable exteriors that last a lifetime.

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So let's let's see what's going on now. Well, before we get into the news, could I ask for a small 10 minute recess? Normally, if I had to use the restroom and I was at your home, I would instead be miserable and hold it because I can't use someone else's bathroom. Whoever, since I'm recording this podcast remotely, I am free to take a shit in my own house and would appreciate a quick reprieve. Will you take all the clothes off?

Yes. Will you hold the toilet roll in your hand? Not the whole time. No. Will you forget that you're taking a dump and then be reminded halfway through that it's okay to release? You never, you never know, Willie. You never know.

I can't stop you. You can't stop me. All right. So I'll be back in just a few moments. All right. We are taking. How do I mute this? We are taking a brief recess and we will be back once Pat has moved his

bowels. How do I turn off the video? And we're back. Hey, welcome back me. How was it? Hmm. I feel great. Good.

Feel empty. Me. I don't like all the poison came out of my butt. Just, you know, um, that commercial for Activia with Ripley in it, where she makes the hand gesture. She's like, ooh, you know, just, ooh. Yeah. Okay.

Uh, all right. Well, news. Oh, it's a good podcast. Full relaxation, right? Yeah, man. Safe in the bubble. I all day so far. I'm like, man, don't shit yourself on camera.

That'd be bad. Well, how about this then? So we talked about Final Fantasy seven and we talked about how much we are impressed with it. So why don't we talk about, uh, something that we got out of Kitase in a recent interview saying that, uh, it would be a waste to not return to parasite Eve director of FF seven, producer of the remake straight up set in an interview with Kenny Omega, no less, that, uh, it would be a waste to not

return to the parasite franchise. I don't know of any plans right now, but it would be a waste to not use those characters. They're very, I don't know, man, rich, especially a Brea, especially Brea Kowski actually is what I, the bad is so bad. The milk's gone bad, as they say, it's gone bad. The milk's gone bad. Milk was a bad choice.

Um, you can't not save that franchise unless you delete the last game and here, right? Let's be real. You can, you can do it franchises have done this. It's very possible to just pretend it never happened. You can totally do that. We've seen it with franchises. We love do it twice.

You just go, eh, and you're just like, don't, don't look, don't look over there. Don't look at it. Don't look over there. You can. Um, and I would argue that the milk has gone bad, but it's been so long that it's evaporated. A lot of people don't even know that milk exists. That's what I'm saying.

There was spoiled milk here, but now it's just a stain. So it's a container to pour more milk in and feed your mitochondria. Oh. I think I don't know about that, but it's cheese now it's become fine cheese. See, people made fun of me. I thought milk was just old cheese and then people were like, no, you got to put like an enzyme in it. Yeah, you got to fuck with it.

You got to fuck with it. Well, then the whole pasteurization process. But if you want to get your Gouda and your Brie and your Camembert, you must, uh, you got to fuck with it. You got to fuck with it. You got to fuck with it. You can't just wait with milk in a cup and have it turn into cheese. It'd be really cool.

Wait a long time. It'd be really cool. If it vent, if milk after a time just turned into yogurt and then yogurt just turned into cheese, that'd be cool, but that's not how it works. You got it. You got to fuck with it. Dairy is, uh, Dairy is a thing. It's a fickle mistress.

It's a fickle mistress, but that's the only way to get a nice old, old. Far, far cheese. You know, nobody told you the cheese was this good. How can you even tell me the cheese was this good? Cheese is good, man. Cheese is super good. What's your favorite kind of cheese? Uh, probably blue cheese.

Blue cheese is really good in small quantities, especially as a sauce. As a real thing, you can't just take a big bite out of a blue cheese. But you, you like the blue cheese dip though, right? Not the, not the real thing. No, I'll eat it. I'll eat a piece of blue cheese. I'll just eat it. Oh shit.

Okay. I dig it, but you need really skinny slices, really skinny slices. Nah, man. Like as long as it's sub full mouthful, I can do it. I fuck with, I fuck with marble. Uh, I fuck with a nice smoky Gouda. Provolone's all right. Um, Swiss is a little too bland.

I find Swiss doesn't have as much flavor as some other flavors do. I need more kick than Swiss provides, man. Um, Pepper Jack fucking rules. Um, yeah, it's okay. God tier, God tier though. Not going to lie. Goat. Yeah, goat's useful.

Goat, goat is goat. Eh, goat is goat. Boo. It's creamy. It's, it's, it's a perfect consistency for a spread and a dip and also a slice. You know, you put goat on anything that has cheese on it and you get that nice. I like it with my eggs, but that's pretty much it. You can throw them on.

You can throw it on a pizza, dude. You can throw it on a sandwich. You can throw the fuck out. You can throw it on a burger. You can get, you can get little hint of goat on a couple of different. So you can put a goat on a cracker and just eat that cracker. No, I'm good, man. Goat's goat.

Goat's goat. Um, you know, but yeah, I've moved on. Standard cheddar, standard mozzarella. Fuck that. We do marble in this house. We marble up. Yeah, I'm not, no, like you need at least a sharp cheddar. And the very least, if I find marble replaces my needs for mozzarella and

cheddar, I also don't care for mozzarella at all. Mozzarella is pretty. It's just too bland. It's pretty bland. Um, unless you're going for the real deal, the real shit, the moots at L floating in the fucking water, the ball. Yeah, that's a weird, yeah, that's weird. How do you feel about a good parmesian?

I love parmesian. Parmesian, parmesian. So it's pretty good. And I like when the guy comes over and he's like, you want parmesan? And I'm like, you fucking keep it going. You keep it going. You spread it up. You spread it up.

Did I tell you to stop? Good parm. All right. I saw a dumb Twitter post recently about this person at a restaurant having spaghetti asking the waiter, Hey, can you dust my wets? And I go, you can just ask for parmesan, dude. And they hold, they hold up their noodles in their, in their hands and just go, my wets and something about that is just so like threatening and upsetting.

What's the most unexpected place you've put cheese and it's tasted good? I feel like this is trapped to say someone's butthole. I'm surprised you went that way and not for the obvious under the foreskin. I don't know what that is. It's Richard cheese, man. Okay. It's nasty. No, it's not my problem.

I would say that cheese was offered as a topping at a ramen place. And I was like, what? Why would you do that? Why would you fucking do that? That seems odd. And then I was like, let's try it. Guess what? It was all right.

What? It was all right. Yeah, it was okay. Yeah, it was okay. It was actually all right. Didn't, didn't expect it. Still seems bad idea to me. Yeah, it does.

It does, but it worked out. It's a decent ramen topping. You know, kind of cheese was it? It was just sliced up as graded, graded mozzarella. It's really nice and mild. I guess that makes really finely graded mozzarella. You know, nothing, nothing big on that. Oh yeah, American cheese.

I remember they had blocks of that in my school and it was just like fucking. I'm really glad that the Americans, when they made their cheese correctly labeled it in such a way so that you knew to get the fuck away from it. I remember having a bite and I was not impressed. I was not. I was also not impressed. No. It's fucking plastic.

Yeah, it's not real food. It's not real food. Well, anyway, um. Parasite. Nice, nice. Now I don't have to smell that. That's fucking rad. That's super awesome.

Yeah, see, see, there's benefits here. What, uh, what's up? Yeah, that's Parasite Eve, Parasite Eve is, uh, you know, a thought, but I feel like these are all questions that are a bit like, you know, the problem is the Parasite Eve did become a thought, but it was it Eve, though? Yeah. Are you sure? Yeah.

No, no, what's what's the answer I'm supposed to give? There's a twist because it was, you thought it was aia, but then it anyway, whatever. Anyway, whatever. I legit don't even know what the answer I'm supposed to give is the fucking ending of that goddamn fucking thing is just all right. Anyway, so, so, so, um, um, you know, I would like to imagine a world where they would bother, but it's hard to imagine a world where there's enough groundswell for it and, um, maybe like, you know, maybe there will be some sort

of like thing where someone says, Hey, someone internally says like, Hey, this is a thing I'd love to do if they get the green light and then the internet goes bring back hashtag, like Parasite Eve and then maybe there'll be some, I don't know. I don't know how this happens, but at the moment it's like, it's too old. There's too many people that don't know or care and you'd have to jump over a speed bump that turns out to be a sinkhole that is third birthday. I cannot imagine any amount of groundswell for Parasite Eve, even like even

being on the same playing field as the FF seven or the reasonable games. Yep. Like I love Parasite Eve one, but that game does not rate compared to the fucking media outcry for those other two. Consider for a minute, if you will, would you be happier with a spiritual successor made by a passionate fan of the game that has a similar combat style to Parasite Eve one and it's just a completely different franchise? Yeah, sure.

Fuck it. Right. Wouldn't you take that? I'd rather see vagrant story be taken on with the way that, uh, what do you call it, um, fucking user words, Pat, uh, the FF seven combat system. I want vagrant story to use that. And I want vagrant story to come back. Sure.

I think you'll find a lot of vagrant story kicks ass. Yeah. I think, I think your name dropping something. A lot of people would love to see come back there, but as far as Eve goes, it's kind of like the pathway to success is, is a very cloudy, it's murky. It is, it is filled with, um, miasma. And I would say that the pathway to a spiritual successor from a passionate fan is much clearer.

And, uh, if someone did that, I think everyone would just be like, fuck it. We're happy. We got this, you know, um, I like that. That's an actual possible route to take in the world these days. Um, try to think of a dead franchise that's been spiritually replaced that we're like, yeah, that'll, that'll do for now. That's more than, well, Mega Man got replaced by mighty number nine. That's why I said I'm trying to think of a franchise that got fully

replaced. Well, it, it totally, what are you talking about? It got super replaced. Well, yeah, you know, Bloodstained is the game now. Castlevania is a Netflix show. Yeah. How about that? It sure is.

How about that? Sure is. Um, oh, Earthbound got replaced by Undertale. Somebody pointed out. Oh, that's completely accurate. Oh, you mean Eastward? I don't know what that is. Wait, what's Eastward?

No, not Eastward. Eastward is a really hot looking game that's, that's coming out. But no, not Eastward. Um, what the fuck was it called? That's the other cool game. Um, oh, wow, you're really killing it. The mother, the mother for, uh, uh, oddity, oddity, oddity, oddity. Excuse me.

See, there you go. Oddity. I'm not even paying attention to the podcast. How am I getting this shit? God damn, man. My memory is poor. Damn it. You know what you need?

No, I don't. Meth. Methamphetamine. Will that improve my memory? It, it'll, it might. I have hard confirmation that it won't. Also, I'll start. Wait, Rick, hot, wait, hard confirmation.

Also, I'll start picking at my skin because of invisible bugs and then my teeth will fall out. Well, then you'll definitely get rid of those invisible bugs. But I don't have any right now. You don't know that. This week, the podcast is sponsored by meth. Would you like some? Yeah, fine.

Go, go see your, go see the guy. Go see the guy. He's waiting, you know, with some. There's actually a police got some. There was a police. Um, there was a police thing that was like, they put out a tweet that was like, Hey, if you want to make sure your meth isn't contaminated with coronavirus, bring it in.

We'll check it out for you. Free testing. Every time, every time, free testing down at the precinct. Every single time. Yeah. Every single fucking time they do that for all sorts of shit. And the trick is that meth heads are like high on meth. They're for easy to trick.

See, the fucked up part is that there is actual, like a safe injection site style knowledge being put out there, which is, look, if you're going to do your coke lines, please clean the surface of the table. Um, before you snort, make sure that you are not using a communal straw. You know, and all the little bits and pieces to be like, Hey, this is how you can save yourself from catching the COVID catching the, uh, the Rona.

Um, I don't want to catch meth either. Okay. You're, the colors are flashing very fast on your face. So you're clearly no longer playing the same game. What are you talking about? Are you playing 14 still? No, I haven't been playing 14 for hours. What are you playing?

Nothing. Final fantasy. No, I'm playing Destiny. Okay. I'm like, yeah. How could you tell? Because the action colors, those are not MMO colors. There's, am I being hit with action flavors?

Action colors are hitting your face. All right. Oh my God. I can see them. Just like I always wanted. You wanted action on your face. Yeah. Speaking of action.

On my face. You see that fucking ghost of Tsushima trailer. I did. I don't know how I feel about that game. Why? Like the, the presentation, not the one that was recreated in dreams. The real thing. No, no, no, not that one.

The real thing. Yeah, I know. Uh, I don't know how you feel about that game because they seem to be just showing off nothing but the, uh, story stuff. And I know they had that gameplay reveal a little while ago where they showed off exactly like, Hey, here's how it works. But I would have expected a, you know, how most game companies will do like a deep dive and they'll have the character be like, Hey, can you?

Hey, this is how you'll be exploring the world of ghosts of Tsushima. This is how combat works. You know, like the way Rockstar did their shit. Yeah. The, the one hour walkthrough. I kind of expected that to have happened by now. When's that game coming out? Is that June?

Um, it's actually going to be June 26th. Okay. So yes. Okay. The Mongols are bad. We got to get them. That's cool. But as somebody who played the infamous games and liked them, uh, those

games are about shooting. Right. So I would like a little bit more. I need some, I need a little extra. So this is going to be about combat and set pieces. Um, the combat will certainly not be on the level of Sekiro, but, um, there's that sort of repost system. Um, and I would say that like the strength is going to be in the

cinematography, you know, I can definitely get that vibe from it. I think it looks cool, man. I'm, I'm, I'm can, it does look cool. I'm just a little like reticent. I'm content. It's, it's, I'm like, like, like looking at it. The one thing I will say is when they did those, those cutscenes, some of those cutscene faces looked wonky.

Um, especially I remember going back to the other trailer, the older trailer. The other day I was like, Ooh, that looks a little raw than I remember. But I'm the, the way I'm looking at this is it's being made by a team that is like their strengths are not in like doing what from soft does, for example. No, no, no. Hell no, God, their strengths are in the, the fucking like directing a moment of gameplay and making it feel majestic and awesome and, you know, high stakes and all that.

And, uh, I don't, I feel like, I don't know. I felt there, it was mainly the open world traversal stuff that they had going on the infamous series. Like the story in those games is pretty terrible. All things considered. I guess going off of everything we've seen so far, I'm seeing tons of, uh, moments of like, you know, check out the Kurosawa moment right here, you know. And yeah, huge big weeaboos for sure.

And if they deliver on that, then, um, I'm excited for it. I would very much like that game to be good. It's the opposite of Neo in my mind where Neo's story is essentially nothing and is total trash, but it's gameplay complexity is pure and deep. And it's also really clear. Like you, hey, what's Neo? It's souls, but it's more complicated movement and stamina mechanics. Yeah.

Got it. Right. Yeah. Whereas, uh, but well, what's the story? And somebody was go, who cares, whatever. Yeah, right here. It's like the story is, is what matters. And the combat is, is so far, we haven't seen the full breakdown of it, but

it seems like it's going to be much more surface. I would like it to just like, I don't know. There's this weird, just good enough that I'm, I'm, I'm hoping for, if that makes any sense, I agree. I agree. That's, that's, but that's, that's what has be like, you know, looking forward to it is that like, I'm like, if the combat is not trash, if it's just simple, but fine, you know, um, you know what, you know, that's simple and clean.

Okay. So I have a clear definition in my head for like simple, but fine combat. Mm hmm. I would say, um, Hellblade. Yeah, I'd say so. Hellblade to me is simple, but fine. There is a single layer to it. You introduce new enemies that can do things, but for the most part, you've got

your full move set there and you can simply do, uh, you can do combo, you can dodge, you can block, you can roll and parry and you just, it's a basic, like if you see this coming, do that, you know, little bit, um, like, I think Batman is like a, just as good as an example, like the Batman combat isn't like deep, but it does feel good to do, even though it's essentially hit button and then hit different button. It is bad. Is Arkham not like an evolved, like, uh, assassin's creed combat system?

Yeah, pretty much. Okay. So you're an assassin's creed combat system that just feels good instead of not shit. So just lead, tilt, stick towards crowd and press the beat up and then wait for counter opportunity. Beat you up, right? That's right.

Yeah. So, you know, um, I'd say Hellblade is more than that. Hellblade requires you to actually pay attention to the group and not get surrounded and, you know, but when we did the quick look at Hellblade, you were the one playing it, right? Maybe I don't remember because I can't remember how it plays. Okay. Well, I've been, and that would explain that I played it recently and I can, I

can say that, like, to me, like that's, that's exactly what I would hope for and expect of like a game that's going for a cinematic thing and they're like, looks combat is not our strength, but we just want this to be functional. If you fucking fire on all cylinders and you manage to come up with an amazing combat system, then God bless, you know, I'll, I'll support that shit for, for sure. But that'd be appreciated for sure. But, um, you know, it's Hellblade being a game that is also pretty much all about the story, all about the narrative and all about the, you know, the, uh, the

character momentum, um, when it does come down to the moments of combat, you're like, yeah, there's nothing wrong with this. It's fine. It just doesn't get much more complex than, you know, the first three types of enemies you see, and then eventually bosses with twists here and there. You know? Yeah, like we've obviously been spoiled by character action, uh, particularly like DMC five that came out, uh, one year and one day ago today, I think.

Um, and there's a, there's a nice medium state for games to have combat depth. I just, I just haven't seen any from that game yet. I want, I very much would like that game to be good because it looks incredible. We saw some like, we saw some basic crowd play, block, block slash. We saw the, um, I don't even know what you want to want to call it. Isen, maybe I'll call it an Isen, you know, where like the guy goes to swing at you and he just fucking like he unsheaths and kills in one, you know, was that I jutsu?

Uh, you can't win. Oh, I mean, I, I, it's, if you're holding the sword, you're in the I had a stance, but, uh, either way, it's the, it's the, listen, this weeaboo shit for, we're hitting. He's, he does, he does a fucking lightning blade, you know, um, or whatever you want to call it in, uh, and, um, Onimusha. In Onimusha, it's called an Isen. He said, okay.

So there you go. And Samurai showdown, it's called an Isen as well. Oh, is it? They literally have the, it's the same thing. It's like you slash move forward because I, very quickly, I was confused that you were using that term and then asked me what it was called in Onimusha. Cause like, did, did woolly play Onimusha and then forget in that, in that 10 seconds. I, I, I played, I played, uh, uh, Soki and, uh, in Tatsunoko.

God damn it. But then God damn it. And also, uh, the system is in there and the system is in Samurai showdown as well. But yes, um, it's an Isen. So that is, uh, that is what you kind of see. And I'm like, that's cool. But yeah, I'll wait for more. You know, plus there's some, like, Stelfin and some boss fighting and whatever.

But anyway, go to Sushi, go to Sushi. Dude, you can't, you can't kill people in the back. That's not honorable. I don't care about honor, man. Hey, that's, that's, that's what I got out of that trailer. I don't know if you know a lot about Japanese culture. Yeah, I do. I've been, I've been studying it for years.

Yeah. Shame and honor are huge parts of it. Uh-huh. Who shot themselves in the foot. The whole joke's going to revolve around whether or not you can come up with somebody good to shoot themselves in the foot. The ghost of the ghost shot himself in the foot. The ghost of Sushi must shot himself in the foot.

Now, was it, was it a final fantasy? It was Final Fantasy 13. It was FF 13, right? Yeah, there we go. All right. Square Enix is done. They need to take it, FF 13 off the Xbox 360 and apologize. Little did that person know they should have been apologizing to Xbox 360 owners.

Um, yeah, little did they know. So that's going to drop pretty soon. Things dropping. You already hinted at it a little bit earlier, but Black Mesa is fucking out. It's finally fucking done. Fifteen. Fine. God damn it.

Fifteen. So correct me if I'm wrong, but didn't they get, I remember when I first heard about this and I was like, oh, that's a cool idea. I like that. Then isn't this like a sanctioned fan remake? It is absolutely an officially sanctioned. Yeah, because they're selling it for money. As far as most people are concerned, it might as well replace, uh, Half Life One.

Sick. Especially since the new Zen levels are not complete garbage, um, which the originals were. What's his own level fucking sick? Oh, the final four levels of the game took place on an alien planet called Zen. Okay. And they're fucking terrible. Oh, they're absolute garbage.

Okay. Um, it's why, uh, Black Mesa made a big deal out of, uh, the last update they put out, the last big update was before 1.0, uh, but they said the game's basically done and it was the game up until you went through the portal to Zen. Okay. Uh, and because so many people, when they replay the game would get to Zen and then just quit and go, good, I beat it. That's, that was this big push of like, Hey, look, you gotta fix it.

It's, it might as well be done. But then they, cause that shit sucks. I like a good fix. That's good. That's good. Also looks great. I loaded up to fuck around with it and it, and it, man, that source engine is fucking goofballs, man.

Like there's so much weird stupid shit about it. Like when you change your resolution, the game crashes for about 10 seconds. And they, and you hear the sound just loop and go, it's like, okay, fine. Just okay there. Did it crash or did the resolution? Oh, it took good. Yay. Great.

Fantastic. It'll be, it'll be interesting to live in a world where all the long term forever projects eventually are out because FF seven remake, we just got hands on with it. And black Mesa just, yeah. And there's, there's an element of, I remember there's an element of like for RE two and RE three and FF seven where you're like, I don't believe this thing is real until it's out. I'm playing it and I don't believe it's real.

Right. And now, like how many of those are left? Oh, half life three. Okay. Well, we're never going to get that. Yeah. Um, go song sick. Star Citizen.

Oh Christ. Okay. Well, Star Citizen's not going to come out either. Yeah. Um, go song still hasn't come out. Uh, uh, what should we call it? Um, Metroid Prime four. Yeah.

For sure. Bayonetta. They are three, they are three. Yeah. Do you see that? I don't know if it counts as big enough for a new story, but that fucking quote of like, we understand people are very excited for Bayo three and there has been little news, um, but we promise development is completely fine and nothing is wrong.

Sure. And all I can think of is like, oh man, everything is burning down and something is fucked up. Yeah. Like, anyway, stuff, stuff, there's two ways to take that game is in development. If it was a good, if it was in a good place, they'd probably have some to show. That game must be on fire. Kingdom Hearts three came out.

That game was on fire for years. No more heroes three is happening. That's true. That's true. It's, it's, we're getting around to all of the cleanup, like the back loggery that is the entire industry is being green backlog. It's being flushed out. And I feel like, uh, there's, there's fewer, there's fewer forever games on

the shelf, still are on the back burners still cooking than there ever were. You know, Hmm. The last Guardian came out. It's super did. Yeah, man. I didn't even beat it. I just, I, did you beat it?

No, we spent our formative years, you know, getting attached to a bunch of games and then we spent our teen years and then twenties sort of falling in love with and waiting for other games to come back and stuff. And then there was just a period of like, I feel like my entire twenties was just remake the thing, you know, and then they did. They did it, it took a decade, but they did do it. So I went through a much dumber version of that, which was, oh my God. Uh, I went through a much stupider version of that, which was, uh, remake the

thing, but the thing was risen evil. Yeah. And then they did, and then they did it again. And then the answer then became now do the other one, do the other one. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Cause it was like, well, we did one. We might do two.

I don't know. Yeah. And it's like, do two. I quoted it already, but it's just like Warren Ellis, you know, it's been 84 years. When's Castlevania three? It's here now. When's four though? When is it?

Yeah. Yeah. I don't see it. Where'd it go? I think there's only been one time that, that has ever been delivered on and I will pat my own back in, in having mecha week two immediately following mecha week one where it's like, that was a good week next day fucking back in. Let's go.

That was a hype drop. That was a hype drop. When is now it's now don't ask. It's now it just happened. I think, I think the best one of that was Twin Peaks where it was like 25 years later, oh my God, we're going to have it and then you watch it and you're like, I don't think I needed a Twin Peaks season four because I don't think, I don't know how I feel about what happened.

Yeah. Lynch, you've changed. No, he hasn't. How about that version of it then the remake comes out and or the sequel comes out and then it kills your desire for more. Is that not a, does not kill my desire for more. I was just like sated and exhausted by Twin Peaks season three. Like, that is an exhausting watch.

Speaking of, you watch that, you watch that indie movie that was him arguing with a monkey. I did not. There's a Netflix movie. Hold on, let me pull it up that David Lynch put out. Let's see, David Lynch, monkey, Netflix. What did Jack do? It's called, what did Jack do?

So like 20 minutes long. When did that come out? It's a movie. What year is that? Recently, like a couple of months ago. It's fresh. All right. It's called, what did Jack do?

And it's a movie where David Lynch sits across from a monkey that's been animated to have a human mouth. And David Lynch asks him a series of random questions for 14 minutes. And I believe the actor who would then be dubbed over the monkey tries to make the story fit with the nonsense that David Lynch is sending at him. And it's in a fake room and it's in black and white. I've seen enough Lynch. I'm good.

I'm kind of sated, as you said. Exactly. I saw some mold of some of his old movies and I saw the PlayStation commercial. I went, thank you. I'm good. That place is commercials of trip. So does make me want to play video games though. Um, so speaking of exhausting that our life six is back in the news.

Oh man, this one's sick back in the news for good reasons. You know, when, when DOA does something and everyone gets mad and then goes, guys, what the fuck are you doing? And they go, we're sorry. Right. We're sorry. And then you wait a while and then you forget about everything and then they do it again and then they do it again.

We're sorry. Are you? We're sorry that you found out that we see you as whales and these weebs. They're just so easy and we tried to fetch the blubber. While you are still alive. We're trying to trim the blubber off of you and send you back into the ocean so that you will regrow more blubber for us to trim and tell the other, tell the other blubbers that there's a good blubber shaving service over here.

They're trying to, to feast on the blubber without killing the whale. Okay. DOA six has implemented a system where you can change the character's hair colors, but in order to do so, that's cool. A lot of care, a lot of video games have that you much purchase real with real money, hair, money, oh, okay. And when you die, the hair is that like 10 cents when you die, the hair. How much does it fucking cost?

It's cost a dollar. There you go. And when you die the hair, um, it is a, it is a die job that is now not an option for you to switch between, but a perm. No, you died that character's hair. Locked it in. And if you want to change it back, you must spend another dollar. Every time you want to change the option of the care color, you

must spend money on hair dye. It is like, like fuck you. You're not looking at human beings. You're looking at meat. You're scraping the blubber. You're just so. Oh, so what I imagine is they have their, their annual DLC fuck them all meeting. And then Shinji stood up and went, what if we charge him a dollar to

permanently change the girl's hares? And, you know, Yosuke said, I don't know, man, that seems too crazy. You're crazy. That'll never work. Every single other person's ideas and they all worked and they went, all right, Shinji, it's time for your hair job idea. Oh boy. I think we should, I don't know what voice is it.

I think we should have it cost a dollar. Oh man, that seems crazy, dude. But you know what? We're going to give you your shot. Oh, yeah, big promotions. Here's the thing I'm doing on a Mickey Mouse voice. That's you are doing the Mickey Mouse voice. Here's the thing.

And I can go to hell. It's in its just it's just such a fucking annoying thing for every time this comes up, we talked about like the DLC costs being like the most insane and the most expensive of any fucking video game. And, you know, it just keeps coming back in this way. And it's like now that the gameplay has been improved to be good, now you are in the realm of the games that people are like, I like playing this game. It is a fun fighter.

But can you not be a piece of shit for five seconds? No. So the I said no. So here's a fucking here's the detail, right? Here's a fun little bit. When you save options and other whatever you make purchases in the DOA fucking whatever in DOA six, they're all they're all server side with your saved with your account, right?

So whatever you buy or whatever, it's like if you fucking, you know, delete your save data, wipe your console, whatever. It's it's it's on your account. It's fine. You regain those purchases. Hair dye is not associated with any server side updates or saves. There is no way to regain it once you purchase it. It is a single serving item, which does not give you your custom hair back if

you delete your save so that all that consumable was done and done was. Was very consumable. It was consumed in. So if you purchase the hair dye and you dyed the hair color and then you you've lost your save and you restarted it, that hair purchase is gone. Well, don't lose your save. Then pay a piggy. Don't do it.

So when presented with that, um, Team Ninja was like, no, that's not a bug. It's working as designed. We we meant it. We meant for people to lose it so that they had to buy more girl hair. How weird and frustrating is it that we can literally praise Neo and Neo to for being the most generous customer friendly? Oh yeah, it's laughable quality of life experience in video games right now. Like it is Neo is such a feedback driven game.

It's unbelievable how much they care and how much they give. But the team working on DOA. From the same fucking it's it's just it's it's because it's not the same development team. It's crazy. It's crazy that they're both. They might be in the same building, but I'm sure it's not. Yeah, clearly, you know, I'm sure they spit on each other as they pass.

The other problem is that DOA has built up a an audience and a market expectation of all these microtransactions being maximum scum every time because they're like, you know, we want to give me the scum. We want to fucking we want to bilk the the the waifu collectors. You know, they'll bulk the weebs. Um, those weebs were born to be built. Yes, they were. And and and it's it's and it's just like you literally have people

in the same building, maybe on a floor beneath you that are like being praised for how much they're doing with the game and how you really scummed them out, man. Oh, I can taste the pond scum off your desk. Oh, dude, so good. Yeah, it's weird. It's it's just fucking weird in the same breath, you know. Anyway, they apologized.

They said, but big anime titties said somebody in the chat. You're right. You're right. But big anime titties. What are you going to do? They can't be stopped. Willie, every time you try and argue against the big anime titties, somebody goes, but big anime titties, though.

And that and that's that. Maybe we need to find that that producer and and and and rub some softening gel on them so that they will soften their hearts. Is that bad for your heart? If you soften the heart, then maybe they won't be as greedy and maybe they'll or maybe they'll live longer and can bulk people harder. Maybe. If you say if you use the softening gel, then the core values will be exposed.

Don't expose my core values. Don't do it, man. OK, well, anyway, that's what's happening over there. Well, you didn't. Well, you didn't like my core values voice. Shit, sex dog. Am I not allowed to go to Evo now? Damn it.

Well, you're not allowed to go to Combat League. Because MK 11 tournament plans were altered at the last second so that the audience could not spectate, even though they had live tickets. But the players were allowed in to just play because of coronavirus fears. So did they get refunds? There were refunds for the audience, people that bought tickets. Did they refund people's travel expenses? Pretty sure they did not.

Yeah, see, that's always the thing. It's like the ticket is always, you know, bullshit. Yeah, shit sucks. So I believe one Kenny unruly got got stuck out there for that. I think I want to say I think I saw Ultra David as well, getting off the plane right as the news hit. So and being like, it is a fucking bummer. But that's what's going E3 is E3 part of the story.

Well, look, so shoutouts to is it canceled yet dot com, which is just a list of things happening and whether or not they're canceled. And if they're not, then they sure are on their way to being canceled. So there's the status of yes, no and oh. So I think this is a great topic to bring up on our first remote podcast. Yeah, I think it's fairly appropriate. It is, which is why I'm also going to bring up the fact that, you know, how we were talking about Sonic not having any thing to reveal

in the year that the movie came out. Whoa, hey, that's right. Whoops. Well, it turns out that apparently they did have something planned for South by Southwest. Oh, but South by Southwest is fucking canceled. You can't let so now they have to plan an impromptu event for April to announce something. And that's what they said on Twitter.

So dude, this sucks. Expect a new Sonic game next month and expect. Listen, it was all fun and games when this, you know, global pandemic was, you know, killing people in countries that I've never visited. But my video games, God damn it. He says as he plays video games on the podcast. That's correct. It's a it's a it's a form of satire, I think.

You can see that. Is that what the kids call it now? You can see that you really, really do hate the current state of affairs. It's terrible. What a what a shame. Oh, I got an exotic. Anyway, yeah, so shit's getting canceled. E3 is basically going to be dead this year.

Nobody likes E3 anymore. E3 smells and also it's going to get canceled for sure. You know how when someone, you know how, you know how. You said, like, just be worse in the video game. I can tell where your hard drive functions are distributing their power and I can hear the absolute absent mindedness. And I feel like a wife at the end of the day describing her day. And I can. Oh, yeah.

That's nice. Yeah, I can. I can add. That's really nice to hear the surface level engagement you're having. And I don't like. Oh, jokes on you, Willie. This is always the level of engagement I have with any activity. I don't like it.

You know that you're on that podcast where I had an early copy of Monster Hunter and I played it during the podcast and you were super mad. I don't remember that. OK, I do. It was really funny to me. It was extremely humorous. Well, I was playing it on my 3DS. Even though things got canceled,

what they did manage to do is announce spawn. See that shit? Yeah, I did. I don't know. I know I don't have any emotional attachment to spawn. Finally has a cape. You finally have one of soul caliber. No, it was always it was always a huge missing fucking element element

that, you know, we were always like, Motherfucker, it's a defining character trait. It's such an important part. It's one of his weapons and it's the reason why we draw him. But it's also super hard to animate only intention intensive. So the cape's there and it's actually a part of the thing because yeah, right? So it's in there. He's got the chains.

He's got the weapons. You know what else he's got? What's that fucking David? Yeah, I was shocked because I love Keith David. But I was like, I'll never get Keith fucking David, bro. Scorpion, I love Keith. Together we can claim we can cleanse the tent. That's incredible.

Keith David, I'm so glad that my surface level attention span was able to pick up your incredibly incredible Keith David impression. Truly, I'm the one phoning it in today. He he does all the stuff and it was it was like, yay, spawn. I know you said you don't have an attachment to spawn. I don't. I mean, I saw him occasionally on comic books around and I saw half of the movie.

Which reintroduced me again to how much I hate John Leguizamo. But that's pretty much it. Well. Yay for cool character being done, cool and all that jazz. I didn't see the four numbers, so I know that's been years, but it's like it's still I'm still it's one of my favorite things, even though it's like only the beginning of the fucking character from years ago. I like the idea of the power level limit on the guy.

I think that's rad, but oh, well, he's definitely a perfect fit for Mortal Kombat. But what what what are the four numbers? He has so when when spawn first came out, he the first thing you saw was like the spread with the character and the page. And then the title and then the top corner of the panel had nine, nine, nine, nine. And that was literally the amount of hell magic he had. And every time he uses his abilities, a little bit goes down. Oh, no. So it was actually a power number.

You would see how much he had left, how much juice, how much MP he had in every comic. Now, was this like was this like an ongoing thing? Like he was running down. Yes, it was. Oh, man. So. And if you do something big and crazy, it ticks over a big digit and not a small one. It was such a cool fucking concept from a comic character hit zero. I'm pretty eventually the series lasted long enough that they found a way in the story to make it go away, you know, and he had unlimited power.

But the call out last stop. Yeah, it was successful, right? But the call out, the balls on Todd McFarland in that original setup to go, this character has meter and you're going to trace the number across the series and it starts at nine, nine, nine, nine and slowly goes down. That was super cool. Isn't it? I like that. Yeah. That's what I'm saying.

So I'm like, it went away really, you know, it went away early on, right? It went away years ago, but I really just wish to see that. I could see that come back in gameplay form. You know, that reminds me of it reminds me of God. It was a manga that you were talking about. And it was the guy had a gun that he would die. Blame, blame, blame, blame. Yeah. Yeah.

It's just like I'm going to dial this gun up to two. Yep. Oh, shit. Oh, my God. Walker went to five. There goes his arm. Just running around the Dyson sphere. Yeah. Yeah. It was it was blame.

Blame is hot with that. Don't make the number go up. Never. Don't make it go up. Number go up bad in blame, blame, blame, blame. It's supposed to be blame, but it blame. He couldn't spell it. He didn't know. Oh, those goddamn Japanese puns.

No, it was just a complete misspelling. Oh, her name is Earth. Are you talking about Tara, Tina or Arith? There's multiple characters that that could apply to. So I think that's a hot mechanic that would make Spawn really unique and fun. And it's it's I wish more people remembered it. So that's a yay, right? So boo with the fucking Lerona.

Boo to the ongoing plague of our time. Boo to the Rona. Yay, I don't think those quite even each other out, but all right. Mortal Kombat being the line of thought. Oh, OK, with more. OK, I see. I see how you're getting there. But now you were just saying I thought you were saying like, well, coronavirus is bad, but hey, at least we have spawn and walk on that.

And I was like, that seems a little. No, the event. Shedding. Right. But now we swerve it back. Right. Now we jump back on to the other side of the map. Right now, we jump back on to the other rail because we got to talk about the moment where Mick Gordon revealed that he offered to make the music

in Mortal Kombat 11 and the guy in charge said, eh, not really a fan. Not really. Not really a fan. One of the gods of current video game OSTs was like, hey, that's got my attention. Would you like me to? Eh. No, man. Un. I don't really care. Believable.

And this is the type of story. This is. I can't believe it. This is Michael Jordan at the Hall of Fame induction, calling out his high school coach for not letting him. Oh, yeah. You know what I mean? This is one of those like, oh, the botch. Oh, the gigabotch. Oh, the turbo fail. Twenty one savage music and Mortal Kombat school.

Can I Mortal Kombat with you? No. Omega fumbles. Turbo flubs on the just I just it is. I feel really bad for the person who does do the music for Mortal Kombat because he's kind of getting low key shit. Yeah, that's what happens. That's what happens when it comes out that someone incredible wanted to make the music in your game and you told him, no.

I can't. I'm I'm so I'm like, fuck, do you know the fucking how many companies would bend backwards for Mick to be like, hey, I like this concept. Do you know what this game needs? A choir of metal singers. Let me invent a new genre of music for your game that's never been done before. Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, I don't feel like it. So anyway, oh, that was that was a fucking wild ride of a story for him to just be like, yeah, I don't know. They just didn't, you know, they just didn't seem all that interested. Oh, well, Michael Jordan at the All-Star induction, man. I'll never forget when the coach cut me from the team. It's like, Michael, you're the greatest.

You're you're standing. Oh, he got cut from the team like he's like, you didn't pick me and he rejected whatever he did. Right. That's why the guy was in the audience. He was there. He call he invited the people he was mad at from back in the day so that he could fucking call them out at his own Hall of Fame induction as the goat. And he's like, like the drive that makes you the greatest

is also that also turns you into a sufferable completely, completely unreasonable. Like years later from the fucking throne, you subbed up this high school coach from the depths and hand him a seat and put him on the chair and put the spotlight on him as you decide it is now time to air the grievances that I have held with me for my entire career and let you know how badly you fucked up. Unbelievable. Only Mike. It's crazy. It's. I don't.

Do you think it's that coach's fault that Mike turned out to be such a piece of shit? It's a part of the thing that made him the greatest. But here's what I'm saying. You thought you were a spiteful son of a bitch. I don't know. You do. I'm mainly spiteful in my mind palace. You do not contain an ounce of the amount of spite it takes. To become the greatest and go back to your fucking high school coach

and be like, fuck you, bro, in front of the war. I don't know, man. You don't have the best revenge is living well. Say it again. Isn't that what everybody always said? The best revenge is living well. Actually, what I say is success is the best revenge. Living well is that's what you say. Yeah. That's not what I say. Success is the best revenge.

Living well is is par. You're hitting par. No. No, it's living well, not success. Success is par because you can be successful but not live well. And that makes you just as much of a piece of shit as them. To me, it's you don't have to define as living well. Being a good person, all that stuff. OK. Doing your best by your fellow person.

OK. To me, those words sound like if you were bullied, for example, as a kid, you don't bully others. No bully. Yeah, OK. To me, this to me, the words living well, it sounded like you were simply describing just like doing OK. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. You can totally get one over on your tormentors.

Like it's I took that phrasing to mean, yeah, I'm doing OK. I derive enormous pleasure from being like objectively a better person than people that I hated in the past. It's a form of like smug revenge where you don't have to do anything. You just have to be smug. Smugness is great. The thought process here being that. That.

Well, it's it's it's it's interesting that I am the best person in the world. Yes, you nailed it. Congrats. It's interesting because it's all the. It's all of the the. All of the morals of the story without any of the humility. Oh, absolutely. So in fact, it's it's like anti humility. Yeah, it is.

Like I ran into a guy who was a dick to me in high school and he was like high on meth or something and he was begging for money. And I was like. And I was like, yeah, now I have to question whether that is what was actually high on meth and begging for money or whether you just saw him and he was just crossing the street normally and your brain. Oh, he came up to me and talked to me and was like, hey, man, I knew you in high school, can I have some money?

And I was like, no, OK, get away from me, Urchin. You didn't filter that that happened. Hell, no, no, that was that was real. That was a real thing that happened. OK. Did he get the rona? No, this is like a lot. This is a very long time ago.

OK, this is like six, seven years ago. OK, see, but what happens if you see the asshole and they are living well? Well, then they've changed their ways and they've become a better person. I guess it all worked out in the end. They must have changed their ways in order to get there. Is the assumption? No, it's not. Wally, your your conf you keep success has nothing to do with it.

If I ran into like an old being good, being good, being good. Yeah, it's about being good. Sorry. Living good. Yeah, it's about being good. Sorry. This smugness can't come from success. That's the specific word of living well sounds like not.

It doesn't. Sorry. It just it doesn't nail it in the in the way. So I keep thinking of the wrong thing. Yeah, right. So if I ran into like an old school bully and he was like, yeah, I spend four days a week feeding the homeless and I'm a social worker, right? You'd be like. OK, time to let that grudge die because.

I'm not doing that. So good for them, right? Unless you are Michael Jordan, in which case you would spend the rest of your life donating so much to the homeless that you crush that asshole in donations and in time and service. And listen, you know what? The homeless don't care about why you're helping. And then you do so much that when you are inducted into the homeless

helping Hall of Fame, you bring out that asshole and go, you only helped like four people this week. You're a piece of shit. Fuck you. Remember when you cut me from the team of the helping the homeless people? And then you and then and then you make him feel. Oh, I saved them all because fuck. And then you make him feel bad.

That's the only reason why you save them. You did some good. You did it. You you took your revenge out in the most constructive way possible. Right. Philanthropy, revengeance, I'm going to plant a 10 million trees and help save the environment because a teacher once got mad at me for eating a hamburger and fuck that bitch.

OK, well, thanks for the trees. The hero of the homeless. OK, well, thanks for the trees. The hero of spite. So it's yeah, it's a strong. It is a strong motivator. So anyway. That was happening with.

That apparently breaking news is that Reggie fills I may or however you pronounce it. Fees, a man, come on, Reggie. Fees and May is now a game stop, man. Oh, really? Really stop. He's going to save it. He's going to save it.

If he does, that'd be kind of crazy. He's going to he's going to he's going to push the Funko pops from the front row to outside the front door so that you see it on the way in. He's going to take the games from the back shelf and put them in the back door and under the counter so that you will only be able to purchase games if you ask for them. I don't know what can be done to save game stop. The answer is nothing.

I like Reggie. I do not have faith in Reggie's ability to save game stop. I do have faith that his paycheck is fucking hot. Hey, listen, I turned Nintendo around or some shit, right? Yeah, OK. Is that true? Yeah, it's totally true, bro. They were going to change the logo like and then I told them not to change.

I was like and that paved the way in dollars. That paved the way right there. It's like the first part of this sentence is perfectly reasonable. The second part. Oh, no. Reggie says I saw somebody ask is Reggie scamming GameStop. Yeah. Totally. Squeeze money out of that brick and mortar before it gets knocked down. 100 percent.

The gaming industry needs probably some blood in those vibrant GameStop. I look forward to being a part of GameStop Corp. Board and helping to make this happen. Reginald Feeza may joins GameStop. Along the board of directors. You know, that shit is going to end in Hans's corporate governance to drive ongoing business transformation. Oh, I love these.

I love the hate the way that's hated. That fake government language shit. Yeah. Three new board members appointed will be effective on April 20th and also announced a number of corporate governance enhancements implementing new guidelines for board tenure. Committee refreshment effective immediately. Yeah, man. Reggie's getting in. He's getting he's getting the cash.

He's going to kick ass. He's going to take names. He's going to cash checks. He's going to get that golden parachute. And he's going to bounce. Yeah, I'll be I'll be really real. When I saw people in the chat going, oh, my God, Reggie at GameStop. I thought they were talking about.

Reggie. Doing something in a GameStop. Like you're. Oh, God. The fuck. And I'm like, what the hell could Reggie be doing in a GameStop that would be so dramatic? Yeah. The people in the chat would be talking about it.

Nothing that you would need to be worried about. I'm certain he's a he's a lawful, good boy. Yeah, I know, but like Reggie is maybe he's giving out spite stakes to the homeless. Maybe he's stakes worthless to a homeless. Maybe he's kicking over Funko pops. Who knows? You know. Could you imagine like some good natured person?

Like going somewhere and like, here's your here's your steak. Homeless man. Go ahead and cook it at home. You can cook it on a buck in on a dumpster fire. I guess you can cook it with a lighter and a lot of time. You get that dumpster flavor. You know, you can cook it on an oil drum. Motherfuckers acting like you can't find fire.

Yeah, you're all you would know. Mr. Amateur Pyro. Anyway, a couple of announcements. Speaking of freeing things off of their previous shackled consoles, pretty one and two are coming out reloaded on for the switch. So those are those games are good. Did you play that? Yeah, they're PSP.

I played the first PSP exclusives, right? Yeah. Yeah, they're good. This guy spent off pretty games or PSP exclusives. They're better than some of the disguise games. If I remember really. But they're they don't. But they're like fucking aren't they like platformers? Yeah, this guy is like an RPG.

OK, and boy, is it OK? It's like an RPG for people who hate being able to play games. Do you think those pretty, pretty dude memes are dated? No, I think they they're they're just fine. Because they were lame when they came out like Ninja Turtles. Yeah, the Ninja. Wait, what? The Ninja Turtles saying tubular and cowabunga years later. Oh, yeah, that was also lame when it came back.

It was like, I mean, that shit's you got to you got to stop that. No, I don't want to stop that, said an Ninja Turtle. Pretty one and two exploded and reloaded announced for the switch. Exploded and reloaded. OK, that's pretty funny. Because pennies explode when you throw better than the than this guy, you said better than this guy, too. Wow. Wait, how did you feel about the item world?

Indifferent. OK. You don't care about there being a world of infinite grinding. I do not. That shit feels pointless. It feels there just to have it feels there for people like men. If you need, if you need to min max everything and you've got a lot of time. And then I believe that's upsetting. I believe the way it was described to me was on the way through the item world

as you level up the item, you will find a better item. Yeah, that's right. That's when my brain shattered was like, I got a really cool sword. I can max it out if I enter it and clear its dungeons out. And then halfway through the dungeons, you find a better sword. Better start over. It's like, come on, man, you. That's no one's got time for this.

That's so insane. I just doesn't that make you excited to go back into the dungeon? There could be an even better item. An even better, better item. That description just exhausted me upon hearing it. But yes, if you are, if you are like addicted to number going up, then that's it right to your veins. Like some people are, I wouldn't know them, though.

Then right to your veins. Surprised you're not all about it. Is it because of the time wasted? It's the amount. So for me, grinding is a barrier to completion. Uh, so take destiny, for example, right? My favorite thing in destiny is to get all of the items. So get all of the exotics, for example, right?

They'll bring out a new season. Oh, they'll add a couple of exotics. Oh, cool. A few more checks to, to, to a few more boxes to check, right? With the sky, everything's infinite and goes infinitely. So there's no way to sit back and go, I completed it unless you want to ruin your life. And the thing you need, which is the day one optimized

Excel sheet doesn't exist. It's just grind it until it's the best until it's good enough. Because you could steamroll if you stopped now. But if you kept going, you would steamroll even easier. And that just scales more or less infinitely. Yeah. So if you hit level, flirt, then. Oh, no.

You one hit, kill every enemy in the game. But if you hit level, blur, not only will you can kill multiple any nice one hit, no, you will still kill. I won't one hit, kill everything, but it'll be a bigger number. Bigger, bigger. Nothing has enough life to withstand it, but now the number is even bigger. Yeah, I like completion. I don't like num, like it's number go up as a factor of completion.

Right. Honestly, right. So like the number go up and like an MMO is like, Hey, my gear score is the maximum it can be for this expansion. Yeah, but also an MMO is you're playing alongside other people. So there's always going to be like a nature of like, yeah, which is why when you go totally hollow for Skia, yeah, you can go bananas. Like it automatically changes the degree of like how worth it it is to do

once there's another human being in the game space with you. That is also willing to go that hard and high. And you can be like, Hey, I'll fucking get you. You spiteful bitch. I'll fight. I'll you're the spiteful one because your number is higher than mine. How dare you? One last thing going down is pretty fucking.

Uh, I don't know where the announcement for puzzle, a puzzle adventure game from Yacht Club, Shovel Knight Pocket Dungeon. Yeah. And it's basically like Shovel Knight cross your puzzle fighter type situation. Um, fuck it. Why not? Shovel Knight has been doing them great. Uh, not a bad game in the franchise.

Everyone's loving it. Wait, it is a franchise. It's a franchise. Shovel Knight, that's shovel night like Shovel of Hope is what we played. It's the first thing. But like each of those expansions is a whole other thing altogether. They come, they come together with the treasure trove, including the smash like showdown, you know, and now they're going into a pocket dungeon.

Meanwhile, Shovel Knight is also in every fucking video game. Well, that's cause he's a likable guy slash fish. Is he a fish? Is that under the helmet? There's a triple head. But, but is it maybe that's just a mask? That's the problem is I don't know, but it's there and it's always, always there. Like they always have it as a thing that is you're never going to not see it.

Whenever he pulls it off, you see the triple head and I'm like, but is he actually a fish band or is it? Dude, I don't know about that. I don't like fish people, but it's also like it's there. But it's there's a, there's a macabre memoir of mermaids in a fucking what do you call it? The world of horror where a guy's trying to turn high school girls into mermaids. And I'm not down with that.

Don't turn don't turn people into a mermaid or man or man. It's it does in fact feature a reverse mermaid. That sucks. It's also an inferior thing. Like you'd want to turn it. The whole point of the little mermaid was to turn a mermaid into a human. Yeah, you're right. Why the fuck would you want to go the other way with it?

It's fish. I mean, I'm not the person doing this, man. I don't have answers for you. Go play world of horror to get your, your, your answers to this, this question that divides us or shovel night pocket dungeon. Or you can do that. That's also is that Pax East, but, but then, I mean, you're, you're playing right into the mermaid agenda.

Supporting shovel night is supporting the mermen. Yeah, that's right. Granted, they do hate the lizard people. So, hey, that's something. Um, let's take some letters and I'll leave you to your destiny. Oh, I'm going to stop playing destiny. The instant this podcast is over. I see.

I see. Well, he is hurting your feelings that I'm doing something else while this I'm doing this podcast. Not if I didn't hear the, the, the, uh-huh. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Not if I couldn't hear it.

I'll listen. I can hear it. I'm going to listen back to this podcast later and I'm going to go check to see how much of that is actually different. I bet it's not nearly as much as you think. I don't know. Do you know, do you know what it's like when it's there? Do I know what it's like when it's there?

I mean, yeah, if you do it on purpose. Drives page crazy. She'll be talking about some bullshit that I'm like, uh, whatever. Well, you can take a look at the chat and see what you have to say about it. It's pretty strong. It's pretty bad. It's pretty bad. Oh, no.

Oh, it's totally there, Pat. Fair enough. You can totally hear it. It's actually terrible. You don't need to listen back. I can give you live confirmation, motherfucker. Oh, no. Take some emails.

Oh, no, bitch. I've been foiled in my plan. Instantly, thoroughly and completely. If you have an email, you could send it in to CastleSuperBeastMail at gmail.com. And if it's, uh, if it's good, I'll read it out on the air and I'll attempt to answer it and, you know, Pat will decide how he feels about what he wants to do. That's, that's right.

Ha, da, da, da, da. Welcome to. Age two. Age two. The, the prepper years. Oh, yes. Welcome to the prepper saga. Castle prepper beasts.

I don't think it's that crazy to like get some canned food in the house of which prior to this, we had none. But now you have some, we have some, I had a go bag. I still have a go bag. I don't think you mean a bug out back. I said, I have to call it that too. Yeah. It's not the worst idea in the world.

I don't think, uh, you know, I'm not going to lean into the bit. You can, you can do that. Sure. But, um, you know, it's just as we cut back each week, when we start to see a progressive hunkering and bunkering, um, you know, when you're no longer actually there, but there's just a hologram talking. I mean, that'd be radical if I could get that working and the hologram like, well, occasionally have like a v-sync.

Yeah, exactly. It'll have a little, and you'll have the little scan lines going. I would love to be a hologram. All right. So we got mail. This one comes in from Citrus Drink and he says, apologies for being a little late on this, but a few podcasts ago during the weed discussion, you asked how high can babies get?

Well, I'm not a doctor or anything. I did spend a few years working at a solicitors that dealt in medical negligence and one case came in where a baby was given some morphine. Problem was measuring out how much to give it. They got the decimal point in the wrong place and gave it 10 times more than they'd planned to because they didn't notice right away and the baby couldn't communicate. It was high as fuck and they didn't give it any nax, naloxine, which is apparently

what you're supposed to do when someone has too much morphine. So the baby just got to be super high for a while. Don't worry. It sounded like it all worked out though. The doctor, they got to be an expert witness for both the prosecution and the defendant said the baby was fine and there wouldn't be any lasting damage. So it just took it all the morphine like a champ. Sounds like a pretty cool baby.

Not saying it's a good idea to give the baby a ton of morphine or anything, but I thought you'd like to know that babies can in fact get pretty fucking high. Big fan. I like that. I like the little hidden story in there. That's like the prosecution was very interested in how high that baby was. So I have a really possibly insensitive question about this. Who's wasting their morphine on their baby?

Well, the baby was prescribed a small amount of morphine and instead got a whole lot of it and then that baby, oh, got to be super cool for a short minute. Oh, I see. What the fuck is a baby getting prescribed morphine for? Didn't say, but it must have been bad. Cause morphine, that shit feels real good. Yeah, that I've, I've yet to partake in morphine. The old, I'd say knowing that the baby's okay.

The real downside now is knowing that that baby's life has peaked and it's all downhill from here because when it cries, it's not cause it's hungry. It's not cause it's got to pee or poo. It's not cause you got to change the diaper or nurse it or cuddle it. Cause it wants to get high on that baby needs to get fucking lit. It's morphine chasing the dragon. It is all downhill from here. You're hearing withdrawal cries.

That's what's happening. That's not good. That's not good at all. That baby needs to get wet. There's a story to tell once you, when you grow up. Yeah, you think that's tough. I took more morphine than that as a baby and they're like, no, you didn't. And they're like, yes, I did.

Look, my parents got arrested. Damn, baby, I didn't know you liked to get wet. Baby's like, PCP, angel dust. He was like, man, training day sucks as a movie. I fucking hate training day. The story is garbage and I just kind of, there are a lot of scenes that don't go anywhere, but every scene where he's saying crazy shit like that, you're like, yeah. Alonzo, baby, weird.

It's a weird Alonzo. He is the police. King Kong ain't got nothing on him. And not only is that fucking you're crazy. I love that movie. Not only was that great. Not only was it terrifying when Ethan Hawke got left in the house. And oh, that, that was very scary.

And they discussed the nature of getting one's shit pushed in. Yeah, you're like, it was a fucking good movie. And then it not only gave us that and it not only gave us then Denzel and his breakout villain role, but it gave us one of the best YouTube rabbit holes you can go down, which is amateur actors taping themselves on their phones. Doing the scene at the end, trying to be Denzel Washington. Doing the whole will have you up in Rikers with a fucking thing up your ass, whatever the fuck it was, you know, and that whole and fucking sequel to you

talking to me that whole speech of that, you know, like where he's where he like he starts out looking around and he's like, ah, all right, Jake, Jake, you mother fucker, Jake, that whole fucking scene is so cringe to watch bad actors filming themselves do it. And like he keeps turning, you get to see everybody doing their fucking turn around to call for Jake off screen while talking to everybody and ramping up to the King Kong ain't got nothing on me moment. And it's so fucking bad.

It's the best training day ending monologue. The new you talking to me totally, totally. And people are filming themselves doing what they think is an Oscar worthy performance is the greatest legacy that movie could have given us. Is bad acting cringier than bad comedy? Yes, if it's like a dramatic yes, because bad comedy can still bad comedy attempting to make you laugh is still just silly. It just doesn't land.

And someone with a really dumb sense of humor will still laugh at that. But bad acting is attempting to get you to feel. A very specific emotion. And it's attempting to get you in. It's trying to try to immerse you and it's just the worst. I'm going to I feel like I feel like it's it's more cringe personally. I don't know. I don't know.

I feel like bad comedy can hurt your soul. Or is that acting? You're like, I mean, I get it depends on how bad really, you know, but. But again, I feel like a joke not landing in many cases, it feels almost like, well, it's going to land with a bunch of people that are dumb, I guess. Versus like, doesn't that apply to acting? Yeah, I can't. Yeah, I don't know.

Hard, hard question, hard question. And bad, bad. Because then you get the fucking, then you get the room where you can play it off as if you were doing it intentionally the whole time. Oh, it was so on purpose. Yeah, that all that ADR, all that green screen on the roof. Oh, yeah, it was it was part of our vision. I would. Yeah.

So here's here's the deal. Here's the deal. OK, thank you. I'm going to go ahead and say that bad serious acting also gives you moments like, what am I fighting for? And oh, it does. It does. Dark soul with light. Yeah, you're right. But and jokes don't do that.

You don't those jokes don't you don't remember those moments in that way. Those moments are fucking legendary staples on the wall forever. Right. You're completely right. No. Oh, man. Oh, that's the worst one. Oh, it's so. Oh, God, damn it. So much more important. That shit latches on to you and never let's go.

So, yeah. Let's take one here. We got one coming in from Steven. He says, hey, South Castle, Super Beastars, should de-ranking in games exist? I usually picked up five, three, five or five, and I went back to ranked, not touching it since season one. Granted, I was low rank bronze, went on a big old losing streak and got demoted back down to rookie, which frustrated me because I came

to the realization that shit happens like this. But I should still ask, does de-ranking happen across the or should should de-ranking happen across the board or should lower ranks not be affected by de-ranking since it can lead to players dropping the game because they feel they're not good enough. Yeah. De-ranking should absolutely exist because if it didn't, then over time, you would have to add new ranks to the top as over time,

eventually people would get enough points to clear into a new rank. I think this problem has been solved and we're and it was solved with Rising Thunder and it is solved in Teppin. And I don't know who started it first. I'm going to guess possibly like CS go or a very large, you know, system game that I haven't played. But the ranking system where you start at the beginning, you start at the bottom and you make it up a couple of tiers of ranking

that you can be demoted from until you hit a threshold. And then you go to the next point where you cannot be de-ranked. So you make it all the way from F up to E, but there's F five, four, three, two, one. You can you can be de-ranked between those numbers. When you get a letter upgrade, you're stuck in that grade. You will never go below the letter, right? See, that's all right, as long as per season, everybody gets de-ranked to zero.

Right. Right. Right. So you but here's the thing, it's not. But so you make it all the way through the letters all the way up to A, right? And then you get to A one from A five. And then once you hit A one, you go to champion and in champion, the ranking goes the letter goes away and the number shows up and tells you what number you are. I like that. That's the best way to do this.

And it's like, if you're in the top player list, you know exactly where you are on the board. If you're at the bottom, I think my favorite thing about SF five. Now, I think of it is that they would just give you a fucking fat number on the screen that just said you're one hundred and eighty seven thousand. I. Yeah, I kind of find that like I get that. But that information is kind of pointless to people at a certain point. When they're like your eight hundred thousandth, it's kind of like

it would probably be more useful if it was like your one to ten thousand in silver B or, you know, it's you got to have that information displayed. But I think they put bronze on the matchup title screen when you're getting into the fight and then they put the number in game. And I think it should be the other way around, right? It should be like bronze in game. And then, like, if you want to see the exact ranking on the world ranking, the world numbers, then you get that exact digit, you know?

But I think you rising sun, there's thunder, same thing. You you start at like bronze, you make your way up to diamond or platinum or whatever, right? Through gold all the way through the rocks. And then once you hit the top of those grading systems where you cannot be deranged from like the highest version of it, you go into numbers and that's that's, you know, that's it. It's like, OK, now you're playing with people that you know where they're at, you're higher, you're playing this games meta.

You know, you're one of the best at it. That's that way to handle it. De-ranking until a certain point for lower players so that they don't feel like they're like losing progress and get that discouragement. But then at a high level, it's all it's all just pure leaderboard. Yeah, I agree. I think that's a really good way to handle it. I can't think of any immediate improvement that I would add other than I do

like how Dead by Daylight and some other games do it where it's like beginning of the season, everybody de-ranks a certain amount to like mitigate it or to reset the shit. Yeah. And you know, the people getting locked in at whatever they've earned at lower rankings is not a big deal because you're still not because you're not like you're not high enough to like, I guess, matter to the grand scale of, you know, it's just there's a threshold where it's like, OK, you're not really like it doesn't matter that much.

This is this is your personal experience of your growth and how you feel about where you're at, you know. But like when you enter the big dog leagues, now you're got it. Now you got to pay attention to that shit. And I kind of feel like that's a fair way to divide it. We got one coming in from Ryan. He says, dear cold brew and orange mocha frappuccino. Not only am I excited for Nintendo Land to open its gates, but I'm excited to

see if Nintendo's planning on following Disney's footsteps and have already themed dishes after the food stands. If you were tasked with developing a menu for Nintendo Land's hungry and thirsty customers, what are some of the things you'd want on there? Regards from Ryan. Hmm. Off the jump. I'd want I would want a mushroom burger right off the top.

First things first, I say. I say Goomba muffins. Oh, I get that. And cupcakes that are like a one up and you call them one up cakes. One up cakes, Goomba mushrooms, Goomba muffins. Yeah, I want a mushroom burger that is somehow like I mean, because the buns make it look like a Goomba already. Yep. Right.

Let's just throw a bunch of mushrooms on there. That's probably the easiest to go. And then you can make some kind of fire, flour, chili or some shit. Yeah, that makes sense. Yeah. Apologize to the home viewers or home listeners, rather, who will be hearing a stupid cat screaming considerably more than the live viewers. How about one here from Joe saying, dear castelans of Castle Super Beast,

how do you feel about words? Meanings being changed or removed in the languages and fiction. A few examples in Joe, in Joe Joe, the word stand or in Kingdom Hearts, key heart, light and darkness. Oh, my God. In the city of Insomnia in FF 15. Are these words removed from their other meanings entirely? Is there a capitalization system when written to stop any confusion?

How would you ask Sora to turn on the light without having him do some anime bullshit? I mean, yeah, like in Kingdom Hearts out of control, those words are totally divorced from their original meaning. They're overused to the point and they're used in every conceivable context. But I think in Joe Joe, stand is fine. Like people say stand up. How would you ask Solid Snake to come see a Patriots game

without him gearing up some sneaky shenanigans? Have you ever been confused by double meanings that might not exist in a few fictional universe? Yeah, that I can imagine that getting really stupid. But I also think that human beings are really good at parsing context and conversation. I think that Solid Snake would love to go to a Patriots game because he would go, hey, do you want to go to the Patriots game? And somebody would look at him and goes, oh, yeah, I love the Lollay Lulay Low.

And he'd be like, ah. You're one of them. If you were to say the New England Patriots, I'm sure that would help narrow it down. And I suppose, yeah, I can't I can't speak for Kingdom Hearts because that shit seems kind of fucking that's gone, you know, like the darkness. Yeah, come up with new words with this key door with new words. Hey, is there some double entendre with door and key and hearts?

And no, they just say too often. Just way too often. It's like, you remember that old, that old audio skit about like, I'm attacking the darkness. Remember that shit, the D&D skit? No. Oh, OK, well, it's ancient. Kingdom Hearts is basically literally just the thing that you don't that don't remember or know about.

So that that really hit really strongly. I'm very proud. Also, stand in the world of JoJo only applies to people who are stand users to which, you know, yeah, I don't know what that shit is. That shit doesn't mean anything. So yeah. OK. Also, real quick one coming in here. Dear Woolly versus Needles and Pat Stairs at Syringes, original paperboy here.

I don't like that. Added super right to be afraid of syringes. A junkie tried to rob me the other day after defending myself. He pulled something out of his jacket. I saw it was a needle and I grabbed his arm to take him down. Eventually he got free and ran away. I was left shook because all those fears started racing through my head. You have every reason to be afraid of syringe attacks.

Just wanted to spread awareness of the danger. Oh, sick. Great. Thanks, buddy. Glad you're all right. You can put an extra lock on that door now. I'm thinking about it. Well, there's that. Wow, that's a big nightmare. Holy shit. Cool. Cool.

So begins the prepper chapter. Yes, something like that. All right, you have a good one. I will. And all of you have a good one. Take it easy, folks.