Castle Super Beast - CSB 117: Negative Edging

Episode Date: April 27, 2021

Download for Mobile | Podcast Preview | Full Timestamps Mortal Kombat Movie Talk (light spoilers), Phantom Brigade: Mecha Timeline Editor RPG, The Worst Kind of Demo, IGN's Egotistical Bundle, The Start of the Internet. You can watch us record the podcast live on twitch.tv/castlesuperbeast Outro: Go to http://expressvpn.com/superbeast to get an extra 3 months of ExpressVPN for free! -- Go to http://brooklinen.com and enter promo code superbeast to get $20 off any purchase of $100 or more! -- Go to http://freshly.com/superbeast to get $40 off your first two orders! IGN Entertainment's acquisition of Humble Bundle Apple Must Face Lawsuit for Telling Consumers They Can "Buy" Movies, TV Shows PlayStation-to-PC cross-play for Guilty Gear Strive to be explored after launch but Arc System Works notes difficulties in implementing the feature  Guilty Gear Strive location test, new build, rebalance The Seven Deadly Sins: Grand Cross X STRANGER THINGS RE4 VR  Virtua Fighter 5: Final Showdown Unlocker is now out! Turns the in-game arcades into a full console version of VF5, compatible with Yakuza 6 and Yakuza: Like a Dragon New Apex Character tied to Titanfall 2

Music . . . Hello, I feel like shit. How are you? Hey, I feel better than shit. I'm a little sleepy and the dog keeps throwing his toys at me. But aside from that, it's pretty good.

Hey, Woolly, let me ask you a question. If you die tragically, can I take a $50 3D model of your head and scam people for millions of dollars with it? Only if you steal that $50 model from the original person who made it. If the person who gives you the $50 model stole it from the original person who made it, then maybe we could talk about it. Well, I mean, we're not going to have a very productive discussion because you're dead in this hypothetical.

This is true. But if the first comment under the 3D model of my head is the original artist saying that this asset was stolen and the person who commissioned it never paid for it, then you can go a little bit further down the rabbit hole. I didn't know about that part. Yeah. Well, hey, there you go. That's X. Oh, oh, that's what I call a society.

Can I, you know, Woolly, you're playing it takes two. We're done now, actually. But yeah, how was it? Good. I said, yeah, it was good. So that means Yosef is three for three. Yeah, I'd say so. And fuck the Oscars for real. Well, there's that.

They're trash. Let's get rid of that, please. The the the the the fact that respawn got recognized for one of their documentaries is pretty cool. Oh, that is nice. Um, yeah, yeah, indeed, that that's that's a game that's a game that's a little bit weird to because they have reference to that moment.

They like lean in like Yosef leans in hard on everything that like people who played his previous games would enjoy in terms of fan service. Um, you know, there's there's references to brothers and to a way out. And it's good. It's it's good shit. Um, but yeah, yeah, that's that's some wild internet last night. Anyway, you know, a Pinocchio movie came out.

Like came out released. Yeah, it was it was it was nominated for two Oscars last night. No, I I like if they're I did not. Yeah, I was to fucking sham. I wasn't paying attention to that shit because I was too busy watching the real cinematic masterpieces. Mortal Kombat, I didn't see that. I should. Ah, that's a shame.

Don't worry, though. I don't care about spoilers for the fucking Mortal Kombat movie. OK, well, I can talk around it anyways, just in case the viewers care. So I won't be, you know, going all in on on specifics. Not again, not as Mortal Kombat as is a guy. Not that it should not that it should matter for the for the the stakes. So I went in and lowered my expectations to the floor and then stomped a bit to get it, you know, under the baseboards.

See, before you continue, you did that. Is that because you saw or did not see the Scorpion clip they put out? I didn't see the Scorpion clip. I just saw that. I saw that that thing. And it looked really good, actually. He murders those people very stabbed. So I didn't I didn't see that all I watched was the initial trailer and found out like, oh, they're doing another one.

OK, sure. And then, you know, they're going to reference some of the techno and stuff from the the originals, and they're probably going to dodge Armageddon with a long ass fucking side step. And then that'll be that. And yeah, I just I went in going like, all right, turn your fucking brain off, idiot, like don't even even think about potentially having a brain for a half second. And I did. And here's what I can say. There is some cool ideas, but there's a lot of problems.

And for me, the biggest one is the fact that if you turn your brain off, the reason why you're showing up is for the choreography and the choreography sucks dick. Oh, no, it's terrible. No, you would hope that at bare minimum, the punchy kikis and occasional supermoves would be cool. And sometimes they do some stuff that's like fun. But on the overall, the choreography is not great.

And that's what bothered me the most, I would say. And like, here's the thing, there are like some cool moments, for sure. All of which you can find in the trailer. Oh, and like, you got to be real. Like, like when the cool part from the trailer wasn't happening, there was a lot of like slow, not quite crisp spin moves and useless cannon drills and just not quite snappy combat, you know? And I was like, oh, man, I feel as if every short film by a stunt team

to make a fighting game like thing for Street Fighter or Mortal Kombat has done a better job, you know? It kind of sucks that like, yeah, like, I guess I don't know whether it was a matter of the the fight director or the talent themselves. But there was a lot of really like underwhelming hand to hand combat, you know, and so that kind of bummed. I just want to see a bunch of kung fu wizards fight for like one hour and have a paper thin plot with no good reasons.

Exactly, right? And then have all the things that make that so that cousin you have that never, ever, ever looked back at any of these things that went, oh, my God, I remember Mortal Kombat have the moments to make them go, whoa, he said, get over here. You know, like, have all of that. Like, yes, totally. Do the thing.

And then 20 years from now, when like that never happened, just grab the even older cousin who never looked at this either and then sees the other version and goes, wow, you know. But yeah, like that's and the thing is, is that there's some like things below the choreography where it's like, OK, here's an example like there's a lot of like nothing going on for most of the cast. But. Mm hmm.

But then there's characters like Kano, who pretty much are the entire movie because Kano makes up people love on Kano all weekend. Kano's charisma makes up for the lack of charisma from everyone else around him, essentially. And it ends up being he ends up saying the most interesting things in the scenes he's in. He ends up doing the most interesting things like because he has an antagonistic personality,

that shines to, you know, his moments on the on the on the stage. But everyone else around him is just reacting to Kano, you know. So there's that. But then there's some like like in the in the bad fights, though, but there's some cool moves that they do sometimes. You know, there's a couple of cool kicks and a couple of funny like little reference to the game there. Like, you know, there's a little gag with like

it's a small moment, but it's essentially like the equivalent of someone just like spamming a button. Scrub quotes, put it up the sweep scene. Yeah, exactly. Right. So it's just a little moment that's like, huh, look at that. That's that's that's a funny little thing they did. You know. And then, yeah, you have that intro that you there is that intro

where they show you the the past with, you know, Hanzo and Bihang and everything. The rest of the movie is not like that. It definitely feels like that intro scene plays out a bit differently. But even in that intro scene, like it's it's like it was it was pretty it was pretty cool, although like I assume to take how far does that intro scene go the one they put out?

It ends. It ends when Hanzo goes up to Bihang and they do their little pose and then they go check out the rest of the movie. OK, OK, right. Yeah, so, you know, and there there's definitely more than a couple of moments of just like. How do I I guess I'll just say that like Sub Zero is he's made to be a very intimidating and strong character

and he is and he moves throughout the movie as on a power level way above everyone and everything else. You know, but he also suffers from a kuma syndrome. In that like there's a lot of moments where it's like, hey, like you could have really just went for the kill there, but you didn't do it. You know, or like you could have made that much more decisive, but you didn't, you know, there's a couple of like moments where you're like, oh, fatality.

And it's like, not quite, not quite, didn't didn't go for the fatality there. You know, I'm like, OK, I I feel like. Let me ask a plot reasons, I suppose. Let me ask you a question and it's a spoiler, I guess. But I mean, it's the Mortal Kombat movie. And it's the question I'm asking is going to be dead on for the rest of the series. Um. Ed Boone has made it his life's mission

to make sure that Sub Zero is literally banned from getting wins over Scorpion. Yeah, I have read a bunch of comics and I have played through every Mortal Kombat and Sub Zero is just literally not allowed to get a single one, not even around on Scorpion. Does that shit continue in this movie? I mean, not quite. But progress.

But at the same game, but at the same time, if you think this is a Ken and Ryu situation, like you're sorely mistaken, Sub Zero is definitely like not just in this, but in the Mortal Kombat universe. He's nowhere near as much of a favorite of Scorpion is, you know, like I remember. He's just the other ninja that was around from way back in the day. But and he gets a lot of cool shit. But Scorpion is the fucking logo of the company.

Yeah, I remember back in in fucking MK two days, like EGM writing out that like arcade operators were talking about that, like 50 percent of all players were picking Sub Zero. Like I was always under the impression that Ed Boone loves Scorpion the most, but like Sub Zero was always the more popular one. I feel maybe it was that way at a point. But I feel as if Ed Boone's push has worked and over time, everyone that I know, like like the there was a

I know a lot of people actually, like I know about like three people that are massive Mortal Kombat fans while still being like casual in terms of gameplay, you know, like not not super like they really like the the world and the fatalities and they don't really play the the the, you know, the game that much per se. And for them, they're all huge Scorpion fans, you know. So I feel as if between that and like and like the way people talk about it on social media and stuff, I feel as if Scorpion has taken the popularity lead. I don't know. I'd like to see a poll to get a definitive.

Yeah, I'm making one right now. It's it's not scientific. No, but that's also your, you know, followers. And I mean, I want I want to know why it's not scientific. Yeah. If you should, stats would be helpful for like any of the recent games, certainly. I just want to see if it's like 90 10, right? Yeah, like if it's anything approaching like 60, 40, you go, ah, yeah, OK, whatever. But like, but like, let's say you're choosing between Ken and Ryu though, right?

Like you're still going to have more popular. But but but no matter what like the the the the public choices are, like the story is still going to have like, you know, they're meant to be rivals. They're going to have their tough fights. And then Ryu kind of is walking down his warrior's path and he's going to edge it out for the plot. And yeah, like the fact that there's more than one sub zero and, you know, the fact that like a scorpion is is like the focal point of the past and the future. I think it's like it's always going to have him with the plot armor

and the plot, you know, wins going when when it comes down to it. I have an interesting addendum to this. I just I was looking up for polls and I found a Nintendo poll prior to the release of MK 11 that had like 50,000 votes in it ish, right? With it being 51.6 percent to 48.4 percent in favor of scorpion, which is hilariously enough. The same ratio that my own Twitter poll has right now. Which is 52 to 48.

Interesting. So yes, someone just mentioned Jin has never beaten Ragnar. I've told you earlier about how ever Kai demolishes soul. And it's like when it comes to these like, you know, marquee matchups when the poster boys are doing it, like how many times does the main character eat shit compared to the rival? I mean, the number one that I can think of is Ken. Ken is like so much more popular than Ryu. I was going to go with Gary because Gary crushes Ash every single time.

Gary crushes Ash's mom. So like that's not like you can't even call it unless the that's why Ash has no father because he lives next door. Unless later seasons like even out the score, I feel as if that is the most one sided trouncing over the course of years. Vegeta doesn't really get that edge out, right? Like I love you so much. He always wants to, but he can never quite get that fair win.

So yeah, I don't know. Get one I can't, I can't, I can't speak for, I can't speak for super. Yeah, me either. But yeah, um, in any case, Mortal Kombat, it's all conversations of bummer. I was excited to watch it. There's still some stuff. It's still, here's the thing.

It's still worth watching as a fan of the franchise to see the fun things they do. Right. This is, this is, I'm going to say that. Um, as a, as a collection of little, you know, fan service moments and, you know, there are going to be fatalities in there. There is going to be some, you know, like, like, oh, shit, moments and whatnot. But like for the most part, even with your brain off, like you're still going to just be like, oh man, how's reptile? Yeah, he's reptiles there.

You know, actually something unlocked in my brain when they first say his name, they call him like they go, they call him out as like the reptilian and then his name. And I'm remembering that my cousin, who I think first told me about the secret ninja in the, in the game as the third one, called him the reptilian. And then I just remembered that early rumors in at least my area were about a character called the reptilian, not the reptile. I don't know if that happened anywhere else, but like specifically that's what I

was introduced to the character as before later on, get seeing the correct thing. That's weird. I don't know. Did anyone like, like, did he, um, I got it. It's been so long, but did he not have his name displayed, um, initially original? Yeah, it would know it was reptile. So yeah, I don't know what it was then. It was, yeah, like kind of like that peekaboo energy exactly where, um,

the name was just wrong and from the get go. And, and it could just be the fact that like maybe, you know, my cousin was, was peeking over some shoulders at the arcade and saw the native saw the thing and then came home and said it wrong, you know, but, uh, there's always the possibility that your cousin is a liar and this isn't a personal slide against your cousin. It's more along lines of, of people that told me a thing. Cousins are the biggest liars ranked only below uncles.

Mayhaps in this case, I'm going to chalk it up to misremembering because he's also the guy that says Madukin and all you can to, to, to, to your cousin. But we were cousins and ass. We were kids. What the fuck do you, how are you supposed to know what it was? You know, like that was just what it was. Like you say the sound you hear and, but that, and that, and you know, like we, we had all that like kind of initial mis, misshit until I got it.

When it became a huge door written on the side of the cab. I don't think move translation names were, uh, uh, I'm, I'm, I don't think they were on the initial cab as that. I think there was like fireball and like dragon punch and things like that until eventually they, they came along later. I don't think that was the case. Either way, I will find this. Okay.

But here's the thing though, like if they were, I promise you he wasn't reading that he was just saying the thing that he heard them say, you know, and then like you hear like, and then you later on, you'll find out it's Tatsumaki, Senpu, Kyaku, but you got to become a huge fucking dork to find that out. Totally written on the side of the cab. Yeah. He would, that's not, that's, that's, I'm saying that he's saying what he, what he, what the noises are, are coming out of the machine as, you know, look,

I don't know. Like I, it's, he's not going to just anyway, you're describing a different person. That's not what I'm describing here. You're trying to set something up. That's not to fight your cousin. Yeah, that's fine. You know, we'll go back in time and fight the version of your cousin that told you that shit.

And then the other, and then my other, uh, cousin came home and he was the one that told us about the new challengers, you know, and he, he was like, they put a Jamaican in street fighter. And I was like, and he was a liar too, but he didn't know it. Cause man, DJ is fucking weird. Yeah, he's still Jamaican. And they go to, they go to, they go to like Cuba, Cuba, Jamaica in pixel form, but you know, anyway, what you could fight my cousins.

It's fine. Anyway, um, just there's a difference between being a malicious liar and just being a dumb kid is all, but when it comes to, uh, what was I saying? The more it comes to, to fighting when it comes to the dumb mortal combat movie stuff, uh, new character is there and like, I don't hate his existence. Cole could be inserted into the game cannon if they wanted to. Um, but he doesn't do enough or say enough interesting things to be more than just a really bland poster boy, you know, just straight up replace Johnny Cage.

Uh, I don't, I wouldn't, let me ask you this, does Johnny Cage in the movie? No. All right. I have a good idea. We could, we take Cole and Johnny Cage and we combine them into a new character called Johnny Cage. Yeah. Finnet, go watch the movie.

Um, but like the, the, um, he's not our Johnny Cage replacement. He's just a, a tofu milk toast, just nothing to, you know, put on him except for his like chosen oneness. Um, and like, I think, like again, it's the type of character that, that could be inserted into the games, but Takeda does a better job at being that character. I saw, uh, like a quote from somebody who was like, well, we put Cole in the movie because, you know, that gives the audience like an in to the Mortal Kombat universe.

I'm like, the Mortal Kombat universe is so stupid. Nobody needs an in on it. It's so, it's, it's Earthrealm, DeFend, Kung Fu, the magic. Done. Ninjas. Yeah. That guy's got ice. And again, like the people who are going to like go sit there and be like, wow, I

don't know who all these people are that they added over the years. It's like, yeah, they didn't go that hard in the paint with the references and the deep pull characters. They really kind of just, you know, they kept it to mostly recognizable from one and two. Like the Mortal Kombat cast are a bunch of fucking video game ass fighting game characters. They have no depth and that's great.

They shouldn't like scorpions, a skeleton who's kind of half on fire with the spear and he's mad at the ice man. Um, yeah, they did. They did definitely bring in some characters that were from later on. And, uh, when you see them and you go, why would you pull from four or Armageddon? For example, I saw that Natara is in the mood and it's like, yeah. So the answer to the question is evident. When it's like, we have a list of fucking characters walking up here.

Here's Cabal. Here's, uh, Molina. Here's fucking, you know, uh, just a Shang Tsung and a whole lot of recognizables and then it's Natara and it's like, right. Okay. So you exist for a fatality. This is why you are here. You have been summoned to be meat, you know, um, and I got a lot of

losers to meet up. Yeah, that's the, that's the thing is everyone who they need to just have be a disposable fatality meat, um, can just be a reference from one of the future things, you know, um, I got a question for you as a, as a fighting game aficionado and experts, particularly your, I would call you like a roster expert, right? Does mortal combat have like the biggest, like golf and bad ratio between winners and losers?

Yes. Like MK has unquestionably fucking winners, like Scorpion and sub zero and Shao Khan and Raiden are like a noob. They're fucking great, but they have like dozens and dozens of words. Here's how extreme it is, right? The fact that we all collectively went, ooh, can she, that's a cool one. And they went really, and they're like, yeah. And they're like, okay, we'll keep them and through everyone else out.

Everything else could go, but they're like, oh, yeah, catchy is cool. Keep catchy. And we all like, yeah, okay, put them in the lore, work them in there. All right. And they just tossed the fucking rest collectively. I'm trying to grab a fucking list. Okay. Of the cast, they, because I think deadly alliance is like the worst one on

in terms of like new roster, because we had Bo right show sucks. Drawman sucks. Frost sucks. Su Hao super sucks. Can she rules? Like he may sucks and got turned into a different character later. Mavado is the shittier Kapal. Mo cap sucks.

Molok sucks. Natara sucks. And Onaga is just a shittier reptile. But Armageddon brings out not just losers, but I don't even remember what you look like, like, like the, like deadly alliance. You go, oh my God, Su Hao, Bo right show. What the fuck are these characters? What are they like, right?

But they're losers. But in Armageddon, you get the forgettables. Right. Like that one who's like just a generic MK girl. And I don't even remember her name. You're thinking of Lee May. That's from deadly alliance. Is it?

Is that the one? Yeah, yeah, you're thinking of Lee May. Oh, I'll grab a photo. Because she started off as a character and then she got like mind controlled by a different character. I need to hear her here. Just just look at this Google search. Because that's the thing is like she's just like Milena with nothing going on.

Yeah, OK, OK, yeah, she's got the nothing. But then there was Tanya, who was also like for, you know, like it got like for onward, you started getting the losers in Raco existing. Like that's the thing is like Raco is like, who the fuck is this loser? But Raco is how Khan Raco is intended to be a loser that thinks he's kind of like Shao Khan, but he's not type of guy, right? So like in that role, as as as the not as the like fake shitty Shao Khan, he can he can be that there's there's room for that.

Um, but like M.K. Armageddon. I mean, I like it, I don't know how to even describe this in terms of like creating characters, but like, do you you remember people being like when like Irmak and rain showed up, people being like just another different colored ninja. It's like the same guy, right? Like it's their literal their clones and they're the same as right. And like, but like as we've gone on over time, the ninja and ninja girl

palette swaps alone, make up a whole fighting game cast by themselves. And ended up in the long term being like the most successful batch of the whole roster. Like if they had just made just ninjas and ninja women, the roster would have had a way better success rate. They they saved Scarlet, you know, going forward. Like they there are the picks among that list, but New Ermax great, but they also yeah, but they could have had their own fighting ex layer of losers of people that were just alongside the recognizable cast pushed off in their own direction.

A million percent. It's it's kind of wild how many stabs they took at it and then like just didn't nail it, but coming back around, though, like I said, you had the the new generation and like we all kind of went like, yeah, look, that's a couple of badasses, like what should we call it? Takeda, Takeda, all the combat kids, right, are cool. Ferre Tor and and and, you know, Devata and not Devata, what am I saying? Ferre Tor was so good, she got to never air in black again.

Yeah, Kotal, etc. Like the MKX new cast were like, oh, shit, these are pretty solid new additions. Devorah, excuse me. Fuck looking at this fucking roster for M.K. Sorry, Armageddon. And there are characters I don't know on this list. That's my point. That's my point.

I I don't know. Legit who Serena is like my that my hope. That's that's what I'm trying to say is that like Su Hao is a loser, but who is that? Isn't she the princess of a quanchin servant, playable, made her debut in Mortal Kombat, like literally whatever, whatever, who cares? Like, but this is my point. Like Armageddon, it's not even about losers. They bring in completely forgettable nobodies, you know?

So anyway, oh, yeah, yeah, Takeda is basically a better functioning version of Cole and and and beyond that, like there's some like there's some expected extreme jobbing that takes place. But whatever, go see it for the for the the gags and the and the and the fan service and just go like, oh, yeah, there's the thing. And then, you know, that's it. How's the brutal murder? Yeah, there's some there's some there's some some good ones.

OK, good. Because, man, I want some fucking R rated shit. But also, like they're good ones, but a lot of the time they're good ones because their references to existing fatalities. Yeah, they've kind of they've kind of gotten themselves in a place where it's like there have been so many goddamn fatalities. Yeah, the best ones, the best wipeouts are indeed the ones that are referencing existing existing fatalities.

You've already seen is fine, you know, indirectly, not quite. But anyway, don't worry about the specifics. The reason why I'm saying I'm saying, go see it because I know that you are a fan of Mortal Kombat and you'll have things to enjoy there. And if you are, that's it. If you if you're not slash, if you actively are like, I know what MK is, but I don't care, then fucking don't bother. They're like, don't bother.

Don't waste your time. But if you do know and care about Mortal Kombat, like you'll have you'll see some things in there that you'll be like, oh, yeah, OK, you know, and that's kind of where it lands. And it's better than Armageddon, you know, I'll give it. Wait, hold on, hold on, hold on. We say Armageddon. Do you mean Mortal Kombat Armageddon, the crossover game?

Or do you mean? Oh, Jesus Christ. Yeah, excuse me. Annihilation, rather annihilation. I've been talking when you say Armageddon, I've been talking about, like, sorry, game the whole time. No, no, the last 10 minutes of talk about characters was all game. But when I said it just now and at the beginning in reference to movies, I meant annihilation. Yeah, I don't know, man.

Annihilation has its own. It has its charms. I fucking just can't. Like, I think I like to me, original MK has its charms. And that's wait, whatever. Right. What about the part?

Original MK has its dumb, fun charms. Annihilation. I just can't. Is like punching the CG monster. No, no, no. Just decides to pull the robot parts of his arms off. And his regular arms are just touching me. So bad.

The money they wasted getting and like Shiva in costume and made up and like fully, you know, ready to shoot to have her fucking pose and run into a cage. I just why even bother? You know, like, are you just going for the the fan? Oh, yes, actually, we were. We had no other reason but to have people go, wow, what's the thing? I clapped when I saw it.

And then I got sad when she got crushed by the cage. Anyway, don't doesn't like rain. Just like it kicked into a pit in a second. So yeah, you know, it doesn't it doesn't it doesn't it doesn't surpass the majesty of perfect campiness and fun. That is MK original. That original is still great. And I don't care what Jay Balman says.

I'm not pretending to like it, Jay. That movie is great. And I would also even go as far as to say that the MK TV show comes underneath that as being better than than what we have here, you know. And then you have, yeah, a number of the cartoon. Or do you mean like the? Oh, no, there was that live action.

What was it? Was it called like was not legacy? What was it called? God, it was so long ago. Oh, the Internet one. No, the one with the one with the relic hunter in it. Tia Carrera. I think Tia Carrera was in it.

Conquest, I might be thinking of conquest. I don't know if I ever saw that. Yeah, I want to say conquest. Yeah, there's some like there's some absolute fucking just gems of low budget storytelling in that because the whole story, like they had like three sets to use for every episode. There was like the outworld with the like the flashing purple lights and smoke.

And then there was a dusty field. And then there was like, I think a temple or the interior of a temple. And they only had those three locations. And that was fucking it never seen this. Oh, man, I should watch this crap. Yeah, it was it was on Space Channel. Oh, she's in it. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

So so MK Conquest can get it. But yeah, no, this this this movie comes in above above that stuff now above the annihilation. I don't know if you follow this this Twitter account before we we get off off this topic, but I got to let you know that you should follow at daily MK four because the daily pictures of Quan chief and MK four arcade cabinet. Nice, nice. Yeah, OK. It is every single day.

This dude finds a new shot. Like in various situations and locations and the backgrounds of shots. I love that Twitter. I didn't know, but I found that like right after, too. Apparently that last year there was an animated movie that came out. I think it was like a Scorpion's Revenge, I think it was called. And there was a trailer for that. And I was like, oh, that looks like a pretty interesting

like that seems like pretty cool, you know, I don't know if it was any good or not. But it seems it seems it seemed all right. It seemed like it was doing I I seem like I'm falling apart over this. It's just like you're naming it like it's called Scorpion's Revenge. And it's like the guy's been getting successful revenge against the same dude for 30 years. Yeah, it's just like I said earlier, like that doesn't need to have any depth. Like it's just literally the same story like a hundred times.

I mean, again, it's it's it's if you've, you know, if you're if you're thinking about Mortal Kombat from like the absolute outside audience point of view, it's like that's that's the only thing that you kind of are thinking about that, you know, is going to be like, yeah, like he's got to fight some zero, of course, that's what these guys do. I don't know if he ever actually gets it. I don't stick around long enough to find out, but fuck it, you know. But that's also why I legitimately like I super dug that that fucking T

scene from X, you know, like that was a really cool take on things. Anyway, my favorite moment in that whole saga was like, don't kill Sub-Zero in MK9. Like, don't suck Scorpion. Don't kill Sub-Zero. You can kill him later. Just don't kill him in this fight.

Then he loses his shit and kills him and he comes back and pulls his head up. And he's like, he looks down the floor and he's like embarrassed. He's like a fucking, he's like a scolded dog. And he's like, I couldn't help it, I got to kill him. In extreme gore fashion, too, mind you. Yeah. Yeah. OK, so yeah, that's that's that's that's the first thing there.

Actually, I really got to use the bathroom suddenly. Oh, that's fine. OK, be right back. I'll have plenty of time to think about my thoughts on the Winter Soldier Falcon thing. Did you finish it? Yeah. Is it done? It's done. OK, all right. B.R.B. OK, so I was actually about to jump over to something else I did this week, though.

Oh, yeah, let's do it. So Mortal Kombat movie. And then I played a game called Phantom Brigade. Now, OK, I heard that name. This is not the first time I've brought it up. It was the time shenanigans robot game. Exactly. It's from the people that may it's from Hello. Brace yourself games, rather.

It's from Crypt of the Necrodancer, Cadence of Hyrule. And it is currently not out, but it is in early access on Epic Games Store. So in a similar situation to Hades, I assume that like I'm going to put some time in on this. And then at some point, it's going to come out on steam and it's going to hit. And everyone's going to be like, wow, it's out. And I'll be like, yeah.

Like I've been I've been trying to push it. Yes, exactly. The the early access is currently out and they're currently going through, like, you know, iterations and changing things and taking bugs and rebalancing. But what this is is a mecha game where you are playing turn based. But on your turns, you have a timeline and it's free control over the next five seconds of what you want to do, where you want to go, where you want to shoot.

And it's awesome, super cool and stylish. I love it. It reminds me of. Like almost if you were to take segments of combat in like FF7 remake, for example, imagine if you were to split it up into like five second chunks, you know, of queuing up your actions and then playing them out in a way. And then the whole thing slows down and then you pick your next set of movements. The game was the one that I talked about when I went to Pax, I believe, like maybe a year or two ago, the last time I went and

was discussing like my potential game of the show because of how fucking cool this whole timeline ability was. I love this idea of like just, you know, looking at again, like what's what your enemies are about to do, planning around it, you know. But in this case, you like it is completely free form, no grid or whatever. And you control like their like attacks and defense and movement abilities and like dashing and things like that on what looks like a editor timeline. Like if you're editing video, you know, you have different.

This has the coolest interface for this kind of thing. I have ever seen. Oh, yeah. So you click on your unit and underneath them, you see a five second timeline with the first row is like, you know, like your left hand action. And then there'll be like, let's say your right hand action on like a set on or like your guns, your actions or whatever underneath that will be your movement. And occasionally there will be things that block off both. So doing a like a melee attack or a boost

uses both your physical and your uses both your movement and your attack at the same time. So both blocks of the timeline are taken up. So I'm watching I'm watching a video right now. It's from Co's channel. And it's I think it's like a perfect example of like just how this timeline works. And it's fucking incredible. Like he's got one of his mechs running away and like a little tank following it.

And as he's choosing where to put the second mech and like moving it around the, you know, choosing the movement location, it shows where the other two will be at that location. Exactly. And then chooses where to shoot to intersect. Exactly. At what time it is so cool. You are not shooting where the enemy is. You're shooting where it will be based on your ability to predict the next five seconds. And you can use that to do all kinds of fucking super sick plays.

One of my favorites, like, for example, being the timeline shows you that like this enemy mech is going to circle around you and shoot you in the back, which is more vulnerable, right? That's no good. So what I do is I have one of my one of my mechs like trained his gun on him to shoot where he's going to be. But then I have a second one that tackles and pushes the enemy off of his projected timeline. So even though it predicts he's going to curve around me,

he ends up getting hit off base of that and ends up somewhere else completely. He ends up like on the ground by this overpass, you know, because it's also in a super urban environment where you're like or like a suburban rather. So there's like houses and streets and, you know, like normal looking like places where people live in addition to like big buildings and cover. And like, yeah, he ends up knocking him over there to which my original unit is now training his gun on that location where he ended up instead

and taking the shots, you know, like really, really cool a sense of cover as well, that that's a major part of the game. So the mechs are about. I would say maybe three stories. Hi, they stand to hide. They stand head above a basic house. They look to be 17 feet tall. OK, they look they look they look like mobile suits.

But with vonzer components. So it's not like footstep crushes your home type of, you know, giant sized. They've got that nice midframe, you know, a size to them. And yeah, a lot of fun with the the ability to move the camera through the environment fully and highlight everything and just anticipate the battlefield. And again, this is one of those situations where, unfortunately, it's not in the game yet, but the ability to watch the whole fight play out

after the fact in real time would be fucking glorious. You know, it's literally going to be my question as to whether or not that's not yet at the very least. I don't know if it's coming, but it's not it's not in the game right now because it is still like I want I. I want like YouTube videos like here's here's how to S rank this mission. And it's just the play. Yeah, so I mean, again, this is years ago.

So, you know, it's understandably like a forgotten moment. But I came back screaming about how cool this game was. It was my favorite. Oh, you did. I remember. It was my favorite thing I saw, and I couldn't wait to play more. And now you can, even though it's early and I'm still fucking in love with how rad this is the fact that like a big part of the game, too, is not just like, you know, the perfect timeline and planning. But you overheat when you do too much, when you shoot too much,

when you act too much. So you have to balance your overheat moments on the timeline by like you can play that you can place a couple of like rounds of like, let's let's say, shotgun fire and then you'll be like, oh, like if I use these shots right here on my timeline, I'm still cooling down from my last action. That boost like shot me up into like 50 percent heat. So now I need to drag the shoot like layer forward until I'm like, oh, and there we go. Now I'm perfectly cooled down so that I can operate

at an efficient level of like the shot brings me right up to 99 percent without overheating. And it's the soonest I can get that shot off, you know. And then after that, I need to make sure that like I immediately upon firing will move into cover because cover is a huge part of this, too. And like having buildings around or things to interrupt where the enemy fire is coming at you is like a major part of like how you you like, you know, stop damage as well. And you can lose limbs. You can lose guns. You can become a walking like a sitting duck, you know,

very easily at which point you have to eject or fucking abandon ship and lose the mission. So yeah, this is Phantom Brigade. Once again, is the name of the game and it's fucking incredible. It looks like the fantasy of commanding a set of troops as a new type. OK, yeah, like, yeah, I can see that. I can see that like the perfect information aspect of it. It feels like, oh, what if Amaro was in the chair instead of behind the wheel? Now, it's now again, it's very it's because it's very early.

There's like issues I had where like like hot elements were like not scaling properly with the size of my monitor. Yeah, things like, you know, I ran into some of those issues. But like what happens is outside of these battles, you are on a world map with a real like with a timer that like moves day, night cycle, according to like how your platoon moves across this map and stuff. Almost like, you know, when you're moving around from area to area

in Bionic Commando. You pick a destination and then you start moving and then other things start happening around the rest of the map, like a little bit like that, you know. And then you can go into a garage, customize your mechs heavily, top to bottom, find details, apply paint apps to them, you know, go all in on the aesthetics if you want to. So like that parts all in there for for the fun design elements and things like that, which these days you got to do, you know,

like nothing wrong with how cool everything looked in fucking front mission that but like, you know, these like now that we can get down to the nitty gritty of like, I want to change the whole body to this, but I want just my right arm to be read, you know, or like just my fist or whatever the fuck, like you can do that, you know. So this game is the hottest shit. And I expect, yeah, once it's ready, which is going to take them a while, this to be like a pretty big thing for at least mecha fans, you know,

um, go check it out though. And, um, yeah, again, it's just like, you're kind of stuck with the epic game store is the only way to interface with it for now, you know, until it releases, um, and cool little things to as well. We're like, you know, uh, there's like, you have a list of pilots. If someone dies, they're dead. That's a permadeath. You lose that pilot forever.

If you lose a suit, you lose that suit forever. And the only, and the way to get, you know, new suits is to go wreck enemies and salvage their parts. If you blow the fuck up out of everything, you get minimum salvage. But if you get them down to the point where they're crippled and they can't do anything, they eject and you get to keep the suit parts. You know, yeah, so there is a actual game of like, where'd they get that from? My wonder, yeah, yeah, you absolutely have your front mission.

Or even if you want to go further before that, you got your cyborg justice. Give me that arm. Yeah, you know, I want that arm. Yeah. So there is a overkill and a sweet spot for like, oh fuck, he's got no weapons. He's going to give up. And what's cool is like when you click on the enemy units, you can see the timeline of like, he's going to run around and like unload like his

missiles or whatever. And then like, you play your next turnout, you blow up that missile launcher, you blow up that left leg, it trips and falls and each shit. And it's not dead yet. And then all of a sudden the enemy's timeline goes from that into he's going to fall on the ground for five seconds. And then a little green thing says, and then he's going to eject, you know. So like, yeah, you have that great little like, I just got to piss his pants.

He's he's gone. He's out. Exactly. You know, so like, yeah, it's all of those little, you know, mechanics you want to see coming back from like, yeah, things like front mission and even like Hawken with your ability to customize and stuff. Fucking, yeah, robot people, you know, like go, go take a look at this one. It's it's quite sick.

Like the I'm so excited that this is turning out like, like I remember seeing it originally in a little kind of kind of rough, but the original idea was so cool. And now like second look like, oh, it's still a little rough, but it's a lot less rough, like my main, my main hope is like, I hope they build like a, a great game around this incredible combat system. So this is where we're at, right? Because, um, yeah. So again, Phantom Brigade, it's, it's got this, um, this amazing combat system.

And you do a tutorial where you do a one view one and you go, okay, cool. And then it's like, cool. Now you have two units to control and you have two enemies deal with that. And your brain, like I just want to see the dream of a battlefield full of all of these units and like seeing how insane that is. And then you spend like 15 minutes organizing a play. Oh, right. You have a good processor.

Well, yeah. Um, and so I, I got to a point where the last battle I fought was I have four pilots and mechs out on the field and I had, uh, seven enemies, right? That seems about as high as a game like that would actually go. And more enemies would file in. Yeah. And that's, and that you blow them up and then you can, if you don't escape in time, there will be drops for more and stuff like that, you know?

Um, and so like you use, or you look at every car, every, everyone's like timelines and then you set up the perfect one for each of your four and that'll take use like setting that up is like maybe 10 minutes for one play of five seconds to make it perfect. You know, like maybe not 10 minutes. That's exaggerating. Maybe like five, but it takes you a while, you know, to really be like, no, that's not the right line.

I want him to move out and then cut a 90 degree like football pattern. You know, straight from here, because he dodges and then at this 90 degree turn, he manages to hide right behind the wall while having just enough to get a shot off on this other thing. And you just, you do all of that and then you play it and it's fucking great, man. Um, weird, there's, there's, there's, again, there's, there's, uh, uh, some stuff that needs working out. Like there's a fatigue system that's not communicated, uh, as efficiently as it

should be the heat system as well. Like a lot of stuff that is in the HUD, even though the HUD looks very pretty, it's not communicating really important information. And if you just kind of go in guns, blazing and overheating all the time, like you're dead in seconds, like you're fucking not long for this world. But, um, if you learn the rules and like how to balance and everything going forward, like it's, it's a lot of fun. So yeah, check it out.

Phantom Brigade, uh, early access on, uh, Epic Games store now. Um, real, real places later. Mm hmm. Uh, also just, uh, we had a fun, uh, episode of get into fighting games this week, managed to successfully do another episode of the newcomers. Um, my friend Julian was, uh, able to call in and we did a remote, uh, you know, session we played punch planet and yeah, he's a beginner at fighting games as well. You know, kind of he's, he's played a little bit of Street Fighter two back

in the day and a little bit of soul caliber over the years. But overall, just, uh, uh, you know, um, pretty green. So he wanted to come on and like learn some more about, uh, you know, how to get in and stuff. So we did an episode. It was a lot of fun. Um, you know, spoiler alert, like he learned pretty quickly and was able to, you know, get his bearings in a, in a surprisingly, uh, a quick amount of time.

So yeah, that's going to be coming out. We did the stream on Saturday. That should be coming out this week as well, uh, get into fighting games, the newcomers, uh, punch planet. If you liked the persona video, uh, where with punch mom, and, uh, you'll probably like this one as well. It's, it's, uh, you know, a different person and we're going to ideally try to, yeah, kind of go through grabbing new people that are interested in learning

and, uh, and walking them through it. You know, who knows, we might even grab you audience. Actually, you know, we need a vetting system for like how to make that work. Can't just grab. Yeah, you can't, you can't be like, Hey, I don't know how to play SNK games. And then they're busting out pretzels. So I had an idea, uh, and I think I'm going to go with it. I need to, to like, further figure it out.

But I'm thinking of having it be like, if you're someone who's been subbed to me for a long time or you have been subbed for a while and I know you and you're kind of like, Hey, you're a name. I recognize you're a, you're pseudo vetted in this way. You're cool. Then you can get, you can come on in, you know? Um, yeah, that, that actually makes a lot of sense because I don't know if you, you've, you've like happened upon this knowledge really, but people

who subscribe to either of our personal channels or like this particular channel, like the Twitch version of the podcast, they're actually better than regular people. There you go. Right. Like they're just better. Yeah. So if you're, yeah, those are the people you'd want to pick.

So if you're someone who's been, uh, you know, around on, and you, you, you're a sub on Willy versus and you want to learn how to play a fighting game and you don't know how to play them and you want to remain ready to kind of walk you through it, we might just do that. We might just do that. You might be eligible to learn a fighting game. So it's possible. We will see.

But yeah, we're having fun with that for now. So check it out over on the channel. Willy versus on YouTube, uh, as well as disco Elysium continues. And, um, this week as well, um, yeah. So I was, I was mentioning, uh, it, uh, some time ago, but, uh, we are all set up. Min is going to come over on Wednesday and he's going to take his second character and we're going to do those near raids and, uh, we're going to see what's going on so I can figure out this, this, this, this lore.

So yeah, about the weekly shit. I asked about that. Seems like it'll be fine. I streamed it, I sat down to stream the weekly quest this Tuesday and it took 15 minutes and I'm like, thanks for making me label the stream this 15 minute quest. Hmm. Like it is, it is antagonistic to streaming.

I see. Well, it sounds like, it sounds like Min's confident that this is, uh, you know, this will be fine. So I trust him that. And, uh, I didn't realize that like you couldn't just kind of go back in and do whatever you want, whenever you wanted. So like he has a second character that hasn't specifically done these quests. Can they added a new game plus feature a little while ago, but, uh, it takes a

couple of patches for stuff to get added to it. I see. Okay. So since the near stuff is, is so new, it's not, it hasn't been rolled into the new game plus feature yet. So maybe in a year, you'd be able to do that, but not currently. Cool. Uh, yeah.

So that's coming up on woolly versus on YouTube. That's what we're doing. Now then, something, I want to start with what I was talking about before. Do I want to segue off of near? Let's segue off of near. So near, uh, near replicant 1.22474487139 dot, dot, dot came out. Mm hmm. Um, and how far did you get?

Not very. Okay. Uh, I'm trying to do, I'm, I'm, I'm to get all the shit. You need to do all the shit. Yep. So I'm doing all the shit. Turn on your spoiler filter and then crank it up even a little bit further. Cause I do intend to go in.

Oh, I have no spoilers to discuss at all other than, uh, brother near looks like a dweeb as a child and he's supposed to cause he looks cool as an adult. Um, the game is so much more faithful than I expected. Like it feels like it feels. Oh God, how do I describe this near replicant 1.22474487139 dot, dot, dot feels like what would have happened to the game if it had been delayed for a year and came out on the next gen. Uh, okay.

Okay. Like it doesn't feel like, Hey, we went, we went back and completely redid all of it. Star Fox adventures. It feels like it feels like a, a full six months to a year, another pass on it. And like it feels so, so similar, except for when you touch the controls, you don't go, E like when you, when you swing the sword, you're like, yeah, yeah. Now, clearly it looks quite a bit better than what things would have looked like six months to a year later from the, that era.

Um, you know what the, the feel, the feeling of a, of a generational upgrade. Yes. Uh, I know what you mean. Yeah. Um, and it really only steals a single thing from automata, which is the way that like the dodge and like run works. Like you have a little dodge and then you, you take off into a sprint afterwards that feels very automata, but, uh, it feels extremely, extremely super, super

faithful, um, including it's still a little janky, but, but now that's charming. Instead of like, uh, did they add the like massive like dodge mechanic? Like, uh, and it's no, instead you get, oh, uh, instead it has something, it has a parry that has like a, like a counter attack on it. Um, and it has a, I don't know what to call it. Like, I think Jean called it like an anime dash. It's like a nothing personnel kid dodge, or if you hit forward and dodge towards an enemy with the right timing, you just do a zip around their back.

Okay. And you can start combing their back. Um, but yeah, other than that, like, uh, game, game feels the same, but good. And I haven't gotten there yet, but I happen to know that, uh, the game will no longer allow you to fish in the wrong location. Okay. That's good. That's good.

If you, if you try, it will say, no, let's go to the beach. Wow. And it will make you go to the beach. That's big. That's huge. It's, it is big. And as for, um, talking about spoilers, I have nothing to say other than the game does in fact feature significant amounts of brand new content that you

will have to work to get at. I see. Um, because it's all at the end. Good. Good. That's, that's, that's what I like to hear. Voice acting was re-recorded. Uh, music is also redone.

Yeah. So the music, I have not played original near since five years ago, six years ago, whenever the LP was, and the music has been re-recorded and it's got stuff where people are saying like, you know, the demon souls kind of thing of it doesn't sound as good or that I don't, I don't care for the new instrumentation. In my personal experience, the music's stellar. There may be some slight changes, but it's still fantastic. Um, everybody's voice performance is still a plus.

Absolutely. Like you can listen to, to Kine's rant in one of the, uh, attract modes. And it's still great. And that was like the proof of like, Oh no, they're keeping it tight. They're not losing any fidelity here. Brother near sounds good. Um, on the voice acting front, honestly, the only thing that, that really matters is a significant value ad is that every single line of dialogue from

everyone is now voice acted. Beautiful. Nice. Nice. Like when you go talk to generic ass NPC about like some bore meat or whatever the fuck, they'll be like, Oh, I want some bore meat. And, and the weirdest thing is that some of those characters are voiced by Papineer.

Hmm. He's not doing Papineer voice. He's doing like, uh, chill man, Seth, I guess you would call it, but, uh, it is kind of weird. I have other, well, I have other. Ask me your questions. I will either not answer them or no, no, no, no, like in regards to like voice acting, but I don't think you, yeah, you can't answer them.

You're not, you're not far enough along too, but I, I, I'm literally, I did like the factory. Yeah, I haven't even done the fishing part yet. Okay. Uh, yeah. Um, that's, that's fucking, that's great to hear. I, I feel as if like, yeah, the original is also like, it's been a while, it's been long enough that like, if I'm, if, if I'm going through it and like

something new happens right away somewhere, I might not even pick up that it's new, you know, cause I feel all the, all the new shits, like last 10% okay. Like it's, it's way back there. What about puzzles and pushing boxes? Pretty much exactly the same. Okay. Like it, it, it feels, it feels like a halo anniversary situation.

Like I might be able to hit a button and like take the, the code of paint off like level of accuracy aside from like movement and jumping and, and hitting the buttons. Fad fucking tastic. Uh, this is exactly what it needed to be in like super cool. That, you know, like this, like now it feels as if it's the most, it's the only move you can make after automata becomes a success is go to the last one and make it not shit.

Oh, and there is a very, very minor spoiler that I do feel like I need to actually talk about because it's a big thumbs up in the original game in Japan. There was some dialogue that, uh, hinted about one of the characters being gay that was removed for the English release. And it was significantly removed. It was like completely egg size. Yes, it was. Um, and they put it right the fuck back in.

Yeah. Okay. Okay. All right. So that's hard confirmed. Yeah. Nice. Yeah, absolutely.

Uh, uh, also, uh, the PC version is kind of fucky. It's pretty fucky. So be, beware of that. Uh, if you run it at higher than 60 frames a second, the game speed starts to get weird and, uh, the game is injecting corrupted texture code into itself in some kind of anti mod thing, or it's like badly programmed. It's, it's weird. So be aware of that.

I bought it on the console. I didn't even know there was a PC version. Yeah, there's a PC version. Huh. I'm not saying don't get it on PC. I'm saying do your research. Um, have they done that before? Have they done a simultaneous?

Yeah, near automata was that was it PC right away as well? Yeah. Yeah. Okay. And the PC version was fucky. Huh. Okay. It was fucky, walkie indeed.

Hey, you and else was fucky walkie. PC came later. Yeah, no, no, no. No, it was the same day. Once later, what? Quick check fact check podcast. I thought I played it right when it came out. Uh, PlayStation four, March 7th, 2017.

Windows, March 17th, 2017. Hmm. So it's here. There's a couple weeks. So it was pretty same time. Am I having? Oh yeah, it was, it was two weeks. No, wait, PlayStation four, Windows, March 17th.

Oh, it was 10 days. It was 10 days. Yeah, no, that's not what I mean. I mean, I, I, I, yeah, that to me, that's, that's the same time. I thought it was like, okay. Everyone's like, it came out months later. It's like, no, it's 10 days. Come on.

Give me a break. And how was PC version of that actually? Was that all right? Fucky. Yeah. All right. Well, all right. Had had, uh, there's, there's a reason why people suggest getting

special K for it. Cool. Okay. Uh, sounds good. What about, um, what about this, this Bucky Falcon now? Should name it. Fucky, Wucky Falcon. Cause the ending is bad.

Oh. So as in the sequel hooks are bad or it just, it's just, no, I mean, I mean, you remember two weeks ago, I think it was when I was like, I feel like they rewrote a bunch of this because of COVID. I really strongly feel that they rewrote a bunch of this due to COVID. Because the, the primary antagonist doesn't make any sense at all. Like the primary antagonist is a very typical, like I don't like the thing that's going on in the world right now.

And I'm willing to take drastic steps to change it, right? But they do that thing where they go, Oh no, everyone in the audience is going to agree with the villain. So they make them shoot a baby. Oh yeah. Show everyone that they're serious. Kid test. Absolutely.

Got to do it. Um, but then later they, like their whole goal is like this pretty magnanimous, like humanitarian goal. And then like at the last second, they just pivot to, we'll kill everyone then. And like, it, it, it, it makes zero sense. Like, like it legitimately makes no sense. Uh, the problem of a villain that is too sympathetic, right? And like, it, it would have made more, cause it would have made more sense.

Like one of the big themes of, of Falcon and the Winter Soldier is about the forced relocation of displaced groups post the blip in the Marvel universe. And it's, it's like a refugee crisis thing. But the way they are talking about it is like it's life and death. And in the very first episode, there's this thing that gets dropped where they're stealing a bunch of medicine for something that never comes up again. And it really, really felt like the story was actually about rich countries hoarding like medical wealth over displaced populations, but that doesn't show up.

So like, if, if it was about medical treatment for a plague on refugee people, the plot would have made sense because it would be about like life and death and the death of millions or whatever. But as it currently is, it's like, it feels like Bioshock Infinite, where the villains jump to 11. Didn't, didn't you say something about like stolen syringes? Yeah, the first episode, they're talking about stealing vaccines and it never comes up again.

Yeah. And the show was literally filming when the Czech Republic got shut down for COVID. So like, it feels like there was a pivot. It's kind of a bummer then, because like every part that's like Sam and Bucky hanging out and being, you know, the personal issues or, you know, them hanging out with Zemo or them hanging out with whoever, you're like, yeah, this is a fun watch. This, but every time it comes down to the, the, the major plot, the, the,

the capital P plot, you're like, I, this, this does, it's just doesn't track. And like the whole, the whole final confrontation is stupid. I don't know how to explain it otherwise. Like the, like the global crisis feels like kind of pointless. Hmm. Okay. It's, it's so, so they, they watch it. So they pick up threads from civil war then.

Yeah. Okay. And like, I'm not, I'm not one to talk on it. It's because like bluntly there's a lot, there's a lot of stuff in this show about the fact that Sam is a black guy and about Captain America. And like they go to Baltimore and all sorts of shit. And I'm not even going to pretend to speak on it, but some of it seems fucking weak and forced, you know, and like, great.

You should, you should pretend to speak on it. I should pretend to speak. No, yeah, speak up. Let us know what you thinking. It doesn't, it doesn't, I don't know. Doesn't, doesn't. How you feeling? Like, I'll, I'll leave that to the more qualified people.

But it doesn't feel okay. Hmm. We're right. I don't know. The whole resolution of the, of the, of the primary plot is just fucking weak. And I don't know. Elaine is there. That's cool.

Julia Louis Dreyfus shows up and I'm happy to see the Julia Louis Dreyfus is going to be part of Marvel going forward. Are you, are you saying that there are elements that are about blackness that are poorly written? Is that what you're saying? It feels like it is. Okay. That can happen.

Like, like, so in the first episode, they have a long sequence with a war machine and Sam hanging out. And being like very friendly and like commiserating over the stuff with Cap and I'm like, I was under, didn't these two try and shoot each other in the face the last time when they saw each other? Are they only hanging out because they're the only two black characters the screen writers could grab? Well, they had their beef, but then the, then the blip, right?

Yeah. I'll wait to hear your opinion on it. I'm probably wrong. I guess. It all depends on what happens when Netflix, Luke Cage walks in. That would, that would finalize. Yeah. Then you would know for sure, you know?

Yeah. Cool. Also, there's some costume changes in this show that suck ass. Oh. That are way worse than what they were at the start of the show. Well, that's lame. Yeah, it is. Uh, so yeah, that's, that's Falcon and Winter Soldier.

It's, it's, it's fine. It really should have come out before Wanda vision like it was supposed to. But then MCTV would have started off with a flop. You know, I would call it a flop. It's just, it's just kind of like, no, not, not, not, I was going to say with a flaccid like reveal, you know, yeah, not flop, but just like a flaccid reveal that, you know, like Wanda vision was likes a good flaccid reveal. Hey, check this out.

Flop Wanda vision is was good enough that like everyone went, oh, shit, okay. You know, so you want to keep that energy and then Loki looks good. So yeah, if they, if they opened up with that, then like a lot of people would have possibly not even tuned in for Wanda vision. I wonder, I'm seeing a lot of people being very upset with me right now. Sounds like it's a divisive show. And I would love to see a fucking point of national origin map on those opinions.

I would love to see if like put a little flags next to everyone's name and see how many people don't like my opinion and if see if there's a America flag right next. Well, I can tell you for a fact that most of them are, yes. Um, does it need to be more, more, does it need to be state by state? I don't know what states are what. Because, uh, I mean, I can, where did the, oh shit, damn it.

I had a percent, I had a percentage. It's not loading. It's fucking, it's like 80%, 85% US. So it was, it was, I remember at the high, at highest, it was 85. And then it started changing. And then we started seeing Australia picking up. And I was like, yo, let's go Australia. They were getting in there.

But yeah, Australia is still in there. It's pretty sick. And then we got 19 badasses in Angola holding us down. I don't, I don't where Angola is. Angola is right above Nambia in Africa. It's a little, uh, it's northeast of Botswana. We got five people in Botswana holding us down. Hell yeah.

There's something wild to me about when you get demographics and it's like 10. It's good shit. I like that. What's going on up here? Greenland two. We got two homies in Greenland. It was good. How you doing?

Wait, I didn't think people lived in Greenland. Oh, they're there. It's just like an ice sheet. They're there. Just two of them. Just two of them. And they got good taste. What's going on over here?

Oh, Russia's doing it. Russia's holding us down. What's up Russia? Kazakhstan. I see you. 41. How you doing? Yeah.

Yeah, they're in there. All right. Well, regardless, if you have one takeaway from my opinion on Winter Soldier and then Captain Falcon, it's Captain, God, I keep doing it. I wish I wish is that man, the writing on the villain needed way more work to just be completely different, which is which sucks because the sub villain rules like the secondary antagonist is fucking awesome. But the primary antagonist fucking sucks.

Yeah. I'll just hit the bench. I'll hit the bench. Yeah, I just do it. You do it in like in like five hours. Yeah. Japan's in there. Indonesia's in there.

Now they're in there. What's up? Oh, also I played the REA demo and it's like 12 minutes long. Does it does it kick you out at a certain point in time or does it let you finish and then say bye no more? No, you get 30 minutes to play it. And if you finish it, they go, hey, you have 18 minutes left to do more. Okay.

Do it again. Okay. But you can only do that within an eight hour period on Saturday. They tell you when. Oh, yeah, I was I like it might be the the most negative experience I've ever had with a demo because I did all my streams for the week and I'm like, oh, I have to do the REA demo tomorrow night starting at 8 p.m. Eastern. I literally it's literally the only time I can do it.

That is 8 p.m. Eastern to like four in the morning. I couldn't have I wouldn't have imagined there was a way to make it even worse than time limited anytime you want. And yeah, that that that would be it. Wow. And then that's that's the single worst demo for half hour. And the first demo was a little longer.

So you took your time on the first demo and then you ran out of time. So then you rushed through this demo and finish it super fast because it's like half as long. And then they play the same trailer at the end of both. And then the online locks you out after the 30 minutes and go wait till May 1st till you get the 60 minute demo, which is the same two demos together in one demo. See, here's what probably annoys me the most about that is that means that there's enough time to in a lot of cases that's basically enough time to just do the intended route as laid out for you. It's almost as if you're like waiting in line at PAX and then you get your chance at the booth,

you know, yeah. And like at that point, if you're going to do the exact same thing that the person in front of you and behind you did, just watch a video. What's the point? Yeah, I don't get it. Like there's if you're just like, here you are, go along the fucking roller coaster ride that is locked in for you. It's like, just show me a video then of the first 15 minutes.

Like I want to like a scam sidetrack, explore, see what's up. Go weird, do weird things. Or if you just wanted to just study Lady D's movements and see what she was. No, don't do it. You know, like, how is her AI? How does she chase you? What's her behavior? Well, she doesn't.

She's not in it. Oh, really? Oh, well, okay. All right, fine. It's like, I don't know. It feels like a scam run by their marketing department to fucking get like engagement numbers up. Like it's absolutely suck shit. Like the demos themselves.

Yeah, they're pretty cool. But everything about how to actually access them and play them, complete garbage. Now this is the third time they've done it, right? No, the second. They like they've done every, can't come. It's a fucking frustrating. They've done every version of fucking demo shit. They've had demos that had an amount of plays on them like Monster Hunter,

where you could only play it 30 times, but 30 times is like 10 hours, right? They've had the 30 minute, so they had the one shot demo for Resident Evil 2, where you had like a, you only had one death in the demo that you could, that's what I remember. And then I had demos that were timed. They, and now they have demos and they've had like free weekend demos, where you could play it between such and such a day. Like I think Lost Planet 2 had something like that.

But now they have, it's a timed, limited time. Fuck it. It's a mess. It sucks. Yeah, someone just called it a streamer trap. And it's like, oh yeah, I can see that. Like people filing in for that half hour. Yeah.

And that's all you get. Oh, it pissed me off, dude. I try not to stream on Saturdays. I'd like to have the idea that I have Saturday and Sunday to myself. But it's like, well, the RE8 demos get huge numbers, so I'd have to be stupid to not stream it. When can I stream it? Oh, the earliest I can stream it is 8pm.

Great. All right, let's do this. Oh, I did it in 17 minutes and there's not even a new trailer. Okay, great. Like I feel like, I feel manipulated. Why even bother wiping the crust off your face for that? You know? Kind of.

Yeah, that's that's that's why even bother wiping my ass. Like it just, and it sucks because it's giving me this, this like negative feeling about RE8, which like, just put the demo out like a regular fucking thing. Like, or don't how so like I would legit have been happier with like a fucking 10 minute like little walkthrough video thing. Um, so we got an OG who, who's like, it's a free demo. How is that a scam?

And it's like, well, in the, in the exaggerated sense of the term, it's not, but it's just rather annoying that an established thing, which is here's what a demo is. Let's you try out a game that you're going to spend $60 on in a couple of weeks. It's like, at the very least, give the bare minimum, instead of starting to do this weird stripped down thing that creates a, that creates a like frustration with the limitations as opposed to excitement for what you're about to buy.

Also, I should, I don't know how many people are familiar with the phrase. I don't know if it's popular anymore, but there's no such thing as a free lunch. Free demo isn't free for everyone. It's free for you and I, but it's not free for Capcom. And when I say it's a scam, I don't mean that we're being scammed. It feels like management of Capcom is being scammed by their advertising department. So that their advertising department can take this demo money,

put a demo out and manipulate it so that they can go, look at all these plays on such and such. Look at these views by like limiting it to very, very specific time periods and situations. Yeah. Just at that point, just put out a video, like make it, you know, put out the first 15, put out the first 20, whatever you want it to be, give everyone the experience that is crafted and tailor made for the stage. And then, and then fucking just drop the game itself when the time comes.

Like don't even bother, you know, putting it out. This, this feels like, this, this feels, this is completely invented by my own mind. This has no basis at all other than my own personal feelings. But this feels like Joe Marketman is laughing his ass off because he paid a YouTuber to sponsor a video about Lady D stepping on you. And that did big numbers for the games marketing. And Paul marketing sitting there looking at his demo

that him and the guys have been working on. And they're like, we're never going to beat the, the, the Lady D steppy shit. Fuck. How do we? Also, I feel as if it's, it's, it's worth pointing out too that, you know, when just hearing about this and, and, and thinking about if I were to even bother like what annoys me, like sure you can look at it and go like, oh, you're just like, your opinion is based entirely on the fact that you would not be able to have a successful stream of this. Cause it doesn't last long enough for that to work.

And thus you're unable to monetize the thing and do the thing. But it's like, no, no, no, just as a regular player in my own time, that's a shitty thing. I want to be able to walk around corners and take my time checking out other shit and do things. And when I get my hands on any game at any place like that. How about, how about this? If I wasn't doing this, I might be working a regular job where, I don't know, I might have to work Saturday night. Perhaps, you know, I wouldn't be allowed to play it.

I have no interest in, in streaming this at all in any way, but I think that sounds like a shitty thing to, to hand out to people as far as getting a taste of this game goes. It's like, yeah, especially the, the, the, the demo ran from, uh, uh, eight PM Eastern to three AM Eastern. Which means that if you were, say, I don't know, a Pip Pip Cheerio boy, the demo ran from one AM to nine in the morning. That's bullshit. That fucking sucks. Well, yeah.

I remember, um, oh, it had different times for different countries. Oh, okay. Well, thank goodness. People in the UK have enough to worry about without getting screwed on the demo. They got to live in the UK. When the, um, DMC five demo came out, that was like only on Xbox one. When I blew off the dust and whatever, it's like you crack that bitch on and go as hard as you can. You know, Resident Evil seven demo was like supported for months and had shit added to it and it was a massive success. See that the RE five demo, like a hundred times seven needed to convince you guys

and like the entire existing fan base that this was a good idea. Right. They had to upsell you on the idea of switching to a first person game. I will, I will give the demo one prop and that prop is that about halfway through the demo, you're crawling through a hole in the wall and you hear Lady D moving around and she's like grabbing like some groceries and like she grabs her shit and then like, no matter how fast you go, you can't reach her before she leaves through a door. And I'm like, oh, they know what they're doing. Okay.

Because you're, you're, you're, you're, you're crawling as fast as you can to get to Big Steppy. But out she goes, never to be seen in the demo again. Until the data miners get a crack at it. Well, anyway, uh, cool. Lame. But beyond that, was it a cool half hour? You know, like, yeah, it was all right. Well, that's good.

That's good. That's good. There you go. PS five adaptive trigger thing is terrible. Turn it off. Um, it's bad. It does that thing where they're like, we're using the adaptive triggers to make it feel like you're really pulling the trigger of a gun.

And what that means is that it makes it like it's required 10 times the amount of trigger pull to shoot the gun, which sucks. So I generally enjoy how it can increase tension on things like things like a bull pole, for example, in, in Demon's Souls, right? But there is a weird thing that happens when, uh, in Demon's Souls specifically that adaptive trigger function was set to on release, you fire and then, um, you go to pull it again, but there's a lock on it. Like it's, you can't go back to full, um, depression right away.

You have to like let the lock release and then there's a little, you know, and I'm like, no, I want to just hold it so that I get the fastest possible, uh, time between this press and the next one. And that was annoying. Do you know what I'm talking about? Yeah. That specific thing was annoying. So that's a feature of the adaptive triggers.

I don't want to see in any other games ever. I don't want to try to tap twice, twice quickly. And then the second time get stopped halfway going down. That feels bad. Like, so this is going to be one of those things where, you know what? I'm going to sidetrack myself. I just saw some of the chat like, but that's how guns work. Like, I don't care.

I'm playing a fucking video game. I want the controls to be responsive, not realistic. Like, uh, everyone's personal mileage is going to, uh, obviously very dramatically here because we're talking about like literal physical tactile feedback. Uh, but my personal experience is that it just literally gets in the way. Like I go to pull the trigger and the resistance is such that it, it delays the shot by, you know, a couple of frames or whatever. Um, because you have to hold, you have to pull it way harder than the almost nothing

you would have to. Okay. I switched to the PS four of the PS four and PS five controllers on FF 14 for quite a long time before switching back to the elite controller because I was having some hand issues. I was getting some RSI and the trigger pole on the PS five is actually really light, uh, which I appreciate. And then making it so that it is like game cube ish level of push the trigger down.

You know, that last bit on the game cube for RE four, like, no, I don't want that. I want the controls to disappear in my hands and maybe provide some tactile feedback. Not to mention that anytime you feel like you have to put force into something, like you don't want to feel like you can break it, you know, it, there is, there is enough resistance on the RE eight trigger pole that I go to pull it and the regular force that I use on my hands, it makes it so that the controls stop. And then I go, oh, I have to pull it for further to shoot. And you can turn it off, which I recommend doing that.

I assume the people who don't have an issue with this are the people who pull their triggers much more strongly in general. So it doesn't make that big of a difference. But like, no, no, thanks. Like when you get around to it or the next demo comes out that you can play on, like for, for my purposes, or for comparison sake, load it up and like fire the pistol once. And, and like, I'd love to get your opinion on it. Because I like the, I like the idea that guns can feel different on the controller.

Yeah, that sounds cool. But yeah, it's like when it comes down to the most important thing, which is just how fast you can pull the trigger and whatnot. It's like, don't, don't, don't put physical resistance there. That, that, that shouldn't be the case. Yeah. Like one of the things that I forgot what I was going to say is the thing I was just going to say. Okay.

I forgot. Well, I was going to say that the switch has a good, nice, nice. You, you, you saved it by not saving it. That's right. The switch and it's, and the 3d rumble or whatever the fuck they were coining that term as like, that's something that is like, yeah, let's go in that direction. Let's go in the direction where, you know, you, you cast a spell and you feel it rumble and, and shoot out through the top of the controller and you feel this kind of like intelligent feedback

that's more like localized to specific, you know, types of shakes and vibrations and whatnot. But, but don't get into this, this like game of we've, we've changed the button sensitivity for this moment or for this thing or like I, you know, I don't want to get into that. Or, or into like, we've changed the tightness of this thumbstick. Could you imagine, you know, it's like, oh, you're in the mud now. Your thumbstick is really stiff. Like, so fuck off. Yeah.

I actually had two more things say that I remembered. One is that Fortnite has the adaptive trigger thing and I had to turn them off immediately because they made me worse at shooting. Like they made the controls less responsive because it took longer to pull the trigger. And the other is that it's like, one of the things that I guess like I'm, I'm tacitly disagreeing with a bunch of people. It's like how they personally handle the controller. Um, Page, uh, played Bayonetta and she played, uh, Bloodborne and fighting Ludwig and also

after doing a session of Bayonetta, she had the situation where she was just fucking white knuckling the controller so bad that she couldn't play anything for like a week afterwards. Uh, and after seeing that shit, I've been like more cognizant of like, don't grip your shit, you know, like try and do everything as softly as possible because I'm, I'm playing games all the time. Like I don't want to fuck my hands up. Right. Um, and so this adaptive trigger shit just like the demon souls one is great

because it doesn't stop you. It just gives you a feeling. The, but the, the bow does put a blocker up for a second though. If you try to quick fire the bow, it does actually restrict you. It, but it's not like, I don't know what this, it's, it, it feels like it's the minimum you could get away with to cause that feeling. Right. The RE eight one, what like, I really would like other people to chime in and for you to

test it yourself. It feels like they're using the feature to the absolute maximum. Okay. And it feels bad. So I, I talked about it a bit before, but like, uh, when I was like realizing how many movements were required to, to get in there with Nagoriyuki and when Shrive was out, I got my glove going, right? Like I legitimately got a glove where I've isolated the thumb to be able to, you know,

like, yeah, it just, it's like, cause I was playing, I was playing it super nonstop that weekend and my, my thumb was hitting that point where I'm like, Oh, I don't like that feeling. God, let's get that. And let's make that go away. But also there's only one day left. So then the fucking glove comes out to, to protect against long-term pain. And let me ask you a question. Did you, you played double my cry five on the X box, right?

Yeah. The SC, I mean. Yeah. I switched over to the PS five eventually. Yeah, I played both. Yeah. Do you use the adaptive trigger for X seed? I only played virtual.

I didn't even pick, you don't, you don't need the resident evil eight demo demo. Go, go load up Nero and X seed with the adaptive trigger thing on and tell me how that feels. Gotcha. I, I'm not going to say anything. I don't even want to, you know, praise it or hate on it. I'm just genuinely curious as to how you feel about it. Okay. I mean, I can psychically project myself into the future and come back right now and tell you I hate it.

Okay. Guess it sucks. Like it, it sucks ass. The timing on that feature is frame perfect. I need. No, it's not. But like, Because it stops you.

No, but I mean like in, there needs to be absolutely zero hindrance between my brain thinking exceed right now and it happening. No, it's the, it feels like a motorcycle. It's hard. It's a frame. Perfect feature. Please, please, please. You know what?

I have to, you know what? I have to use the restroom. I'll be back in a few minutes. It would be great if you could come back with the opinion on that. It would take too long. It would take too long. Ah, darn. Okay.

Well, next week then. I appreciate it. But I really have to use the washroom. I'm going to piss myself. BRB. Yo, that sucks. Yo, that feels really bad. I hate it.

I'm so glad that that is the, uh, that you could weigh in on this, this fucking hot topic because it's, it blows. I don't want to feel anything. I don't want to feel anything when I exceed. Don't do that. And it's so strong too. Like it's, it's really heavy. Now, yes, you can turn it off.

It's in the options called trigger effect and thank God. You should. But boo, boo with that. It's not the restriction. It's just the vibration of the trigger as it's rumbling to like be like a motorcycle revving. Yeah. Like, no, no, please. It's, it's there.

It's there because like if you're, if you're doing the hold revs, you know, then it's like, again, it's emulating the motorcycle like, like, like Turner or whatever. But if you're trying to max act, you're just getting of the, of like a shit feeling when you do it. So I, I tried it for a bit and it's like all of my like ability to max act just went right out the window. Just couldn't do it anymore. Again, like we, the fact that my fingers and hands are even involved in the input process is already a problem.

Yeah, I agree. Let's just hit the ethernet port in the back of the skull. You can reduce all the lag that way. Let's just get right to it. Inputs, inputs. Oh, well, I have one last thing to talk about this week. And that is, uh, I want to thank something. I'm very thankful this day for orb because orb has done me fine this week

because orb has convinced the Quebec government that I get to hop the line for a vaccine next week. Woo. I too am scheduled because of orb. Oh, yeah? Really? Oh, yeah. I didn't think you were orping it up. Oh, no, my, my, uh, my BMI is, is, it ain't good.

All right. Woo. It ain't good. Yeah. Yeah. It was master plan. It was totally worth it. Take, just take the L.

Take, just take the L. Not take the W, man. Gonna walk past all those skinny people. Gonna get my jab. Take that. Healthies. It's like the worst possible reason to be able to go do this. And it's just like, no, the worst, the worst possible reason is that you're like suffering

from like renal failure or chemotherapy. Well, that, no, but that, but that makes it the best reason. Oh, oh, okay. I understand what you mean. Yes. Oh, I had it backwards. Yeah. Yeah.

Being, being horribly ill. It's terrible. Yeah. But yeah, uh, Canada is finally rolling out. So that's nice. Um, now, now that, now that you're scheduled and now that, uh, my buddy already got his jab and I, I'm scheduled, I do want to point out what might be the funniest thing about this whole process is that Quebec opened it up to people that have like, oh God, it's so many health conditions.

Right. Like you saw the list. I assume it's huge and they've decided that we're going to go on the honor system. That once you, when you sign up, you go, I totally have one of these. And when you show up, they go, do you have one of these? And you go, yeah. And then they get you with it. Seems to be the way they're doing it.

Yep. And I'll be very real with y'all. If I was a skinny, skinny tall man who was in perfect health, I would suddenly dramatically come down with the diabetes for sure. Wink. There's a, there's a, there's a, a, a train of thought on it though, where it's almost like, um, anyone who's really excited to get it should certainly because the concerns are for those who should be going, but aren't right.

I spoke to one of my neighbors a few weeks ago in which I was like, man, I open up, they open up that vaccine shit soon. I can't wait to get nine. How about you? And they were like, I don't know. Yeah. And I'm like, you don't know you. What do you mean?

You don't know like about the AstraZeneca or the Pfizer or whatever. They're like, nah, I don't know. I heard some things and I'm like, and I'm like, okay. And then earlier, like a week earlier, I remember hearing them going like, oh, this lockdown is so shit. I can't wait to get back to traveling. And I'm like, you're fucking kidding yourself, bro. You are like, hey, hey, you are crazy.

Yo, how did, um, how did your conversation with your parents go? My mom and dad? Yeah. Mom and dad are already vaccinated. Well, half vaccinated. That's good. They couldn't get on that shit fast stuff. My dad has had five, six heart attacks.

He's got a pacemaker and he's a busted pile of shit. And my mom has got diabetes. So like, I'm glad to hear it. They were like in line as fast as they could. That's awesome. That's really cool. And they, they also miss me and Paige. Like we can't really hang out.

That's dope. Do we even need to continue this conversation? I'd rather not. You asking me the, okay. How about some sponsors? Yeah. Yeah, let's get some sponsors. Before that, if you want to check out my crap,

you can go to twitch.tv slash Pat stairs at, we're doing near replicant and disco Elysium this week with some return on Friday. This week. The podcast is sponsored by this week. The podcast is sponsored by who is it? It's, it's express VPN.

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Now, you know, I hear that once you do get your 5G, there's going to be a couple moments you're going to have where you're going to feel it as your body gets stronger. When Paige got her shot, she couldn't lift her arm for like a day and a half. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The big old dead arm and stuff, right?

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The MRNA is going to give you that 5G, but that's going to suck. So you're going to really, really want to be comfy. Yeah. Unless you went with a non-MRNA, but, you know. Yeah, I don't know what is that, like a retro virus? Antigens, um, antigen based. Essentially. I'm not, I'm not a doctor.

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I certainly, now if I had, if I had been eaten freshly and, and, and, uh, you know, been a little, a little more in control, uh, I perhaps would have not been eligible for the, uh, for the services that we are, we are discussing on the podcast at the moment, but nonetheless, uh, freshly, you know what you could have done, right? What you could have gotten all nice and healthy and slim with freshly and then they, they're like, oh, we're going to do the rollout for, you know, the fatties and you just fucking bulk up like, you'd be like, set your appointment for two weeks and be like, I can do it. Well, I'll tell you what, like as soon as I'm, I'm, I'm done getting my vaccine, then I'm

going to be ready to, you know, get back down to slim back down, right? It's totally going to happen. Yeah. That's a hundred percent going to happen. Absolutely. Committed for real, real. Me too. Did it before.

Totally. Can do it again. Yeah. I bought a rowing machine. Oh, that's so funny. What? I think it's just tone of voice. Anyway, dinner time can be chaotic, but with freshly it's easy.

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And now I'm working on it for years. I saw this coming. And now that we're in the clear, we can go back with the facade is off. The jig is up. We can go back to what it's supposed to be, you know? I don't know. We're getting those boosters next year probably. I might I might keep mine on just in case.

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I want to respond to some some bullshit I saw earlier this week where somebody asked like why is why are the ads so long? And man, I want to fight you in the street. I am like fucking so stoked to do the ads every week. Shut up. It's my favorite part of the fucking show. I'm always losing it. So are we.

But that's besides the point. Speaking of always losing it, boy. Yeah, what do you got? A bunch of new sponsors every time. No, anyway. Listen, they don't always come back, folks. And you can you can it's all good. Hey, that's not.

Listen, there's only so much hair out there, dude. Yeah. And it's fine. And it's fine, you know, they know, you know, we know, it's all good. Keep on keep on keep on pushing for me to talk about forcing your balls to be shaved. Maybe one day it'll happen, but not anytime soon. I can tell you that. You got them all.

Got them all. Let me just scroll a little bit here. Yeah. Yeah, no, that's that's that's fucking that's over and done with, buddy. They're out. But what's what's what's not out? If I were to go back over here is. That are you for VR thing?

So that exists on that. Well, on one hand, that's a that's a cool game and a new version is cool. And on the other hand, that shit looks terrible. So Resident Evil 4 VR exists and there's details of a merch as well as some gameplay. And from what I can tell, this is not a new version of Resident Evil 4. It's a different game. Because you legitimately are able to your you can dual wield weapons like you can do shit and teleporting and and move in ways that are just not at all.

Are you for like, yeah, this is a different game. I guess it's an example of like trying to convert the the trying to convert the the RE7 work into previous games and see if that's a that's a thing. I don't know. It looks completely different because RE7 didn't have like the hand movement shit. It was just purely visual. But it's like it's like retrofitting that style of gameplay into the the maps that, you know, the original game had.

No, no, no, because RE7 controlled the same like if you're using VR. RE4 VR is going to be like the pivot and then teleport to a spot and then shoot kind of VR thing. No, there's walking around. There's walking around. Of course there is. Yeah, here, I'll send you a footage of it. Well, not not of I mean, not of course, a lot of VR games don't do that. I don't know if Half-Life, Alex inspired people.

But dual wield move by a stick or teleport. Okay, that's that's what I was thinking of. Yeah, teleporting is is definitely a comfort option for those who get motion sickness because walking speed in VR games can absolutely make you feel queasy. If it's not handled very, very carefully. But yeah, you can walk around. There's the the footage here shows that you also and it says what does it say? Textures updated overhaul geometry, enemy behavior, high frame rate, spatial audio out later this year.

So yeah, this is coming out at some point in the next couple of months. Is the PS5 VR thing going to exist? No, it hasn't even been like yeah, I think it's even been shown. So they're just this is going to be yeah. So this is just going to be like, I guess, PC and PS4 VR then. Well, um, sure. I wonder what dual wielding will mean. And I also wonder what like boss fights are going to turn into.

They're probably just going to be shooting galleries. Yeah, you can't have a boss fight that's movement heavy. Oh, you'd fucking throw up. Yeah, I'm just I'm thinking about like, you know, any of those like almost all of them really. Where like you're not just moving and shooting and moving through a shooting gallery, but like you have a big ass fucking, you know, thing chasing you or whatever. Or you got to move or move throughout a room. Hold on a second.

Wait a minute. What is this? Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. Did I miss a detail that's really important here? Oculus VR, Facebook exclusive to, yeah, well, fuck me. Okay.

Never mind then. Yeah, probably turn some of those boss fights into their like umbrella chronicles versions of themselves. Yeah, probably. I assume that's what the whole game is going to be. It's going to be like you're in the village center and then you're going to like go to the next set piece. I can seriously doubt it's going to retain the kind of structure that the original did

where you're actually like getting keys and shit like that. Speaking of not retaining the structure of the original, it would appear that IGN entertainment has acquired humble bundle. Oh, man, this story fucking blows and that acquisition is one thing. But alongside that comes some changes that have been announced about humble bundle, which to be fair, I have not kept an eye on in a long time. I remember when I first heard about it. I acquired humble a couple of years ago.

Okay. Well, they just announced hadn't hadn't done anything to it yet. They just announced what they'd be changing then if that's an old story about the acquisition, then the updates are that the default charity donation will be five percent. And you can update from 15, I think, and you can up that to maximum 15 percent. Oh. Before you could go a way above that. A hundred percent.

Yeah. In this case, you are now capped at maximum 15 percent. And it automatically puts it down to five. Primary focus shifted from supporting charity to profit margins. Oh, wow. Yep, they've updated. That's like sales tax. That's like the exact amount that you could use to write off on taxes.

So, you know, this is the type of thing where you hear about what humble bundle is. And, you know, it sounds fantastic because it's like usually indie games. Well, at least how it started indie games and indie developers putting up games for, you know, sale to this that can support the developer support charity. You can choose how you want to handle that. And it's just win-win all around. Eventually, it grew and got larger publishers involved. And there would be, you know, like, I'm pretty sure there was a EA humble bundle

at some point, you know, or a Ubisoft humble bundle and things like that. So, but the point remains that, like, if you're setting your donation amounts to whatever you're comfortable with at whatever rate, then you could increase the amount and it would unlock extra games. But again, it's meant to be a sort of a win-win situation. Well, that acquisition from whenever is you don't acquire a company unless you plan to make a profit on that acquisition at some point, don't you? So, yeah, they might have stayed silent for a while, but they just, you know,

recently came out and went like, no, we're going to cap it at 15. No money now. Money, money. No longer humble. Oh, like a money, please. Somewhat braggadocious bundle. Yeah, this thing is, like, just completely pointless now. Sir, can you, can you not? Now, again, I feel as if I have not heard of or kept an eye on humble releases.

In a very long time, there was a point in which I would check out everyone and go in and, and, and, you know, I was supporting it heavily when it first came out. But that has just kind of not been the case after a certain amount of time. So I don't know what was going on with it recently anyway, per se. But this is not paying attention once IGN bought it. It seemed to immediately shit itself up. Well, this is anyway, is a pretty clear cut example of like nice things and why you can't have them. So yeah, that's right.

IGN not content to give god hand bad scores is out there straight up murdering children. You heard it here first. But hey, itch.io can be got acquired on on what is on Epic Games Store now. And what it's its own fucking launcher. What the hell? Yeah, but there's it had. There's an app and as an April Fool's joke, they were put on. They put it on steam green light years ago and then it got shut down.

Um, as it like as an app within the it was I'm so confused by the story like I have. I'm not going to lie because what I read is a tweet describing how itch.io is now available on the Epic Games Store so you can buy a launcher for games within a launcher. And then underneath that the itch.io founder saying that years ago as an April Fool's joke, we were on steam green light, but then it got shut down and steam basically refused to allow it to exist on the platform. So now it here it is again on Epic Games. So I'm it's so weird.

It's such a weird thing, but yes, it's this is a thing. Do people call it itch.io? I don't know. What do they call it? Do they call it itch.io? Well, I call it itch.io. Am I wrong? I say itch.io because if you just type itch.io that

I don't know. I don't know. I've never, I'm making a tactical decision because I haven't heard people say it in real life. I say it because that's the URL you have to type in, right? Crossknotes. Anyway, it's crossknot. Oh, fuck. God damn.

Man, you need to get in the Kingdom Hearts and get into the Keyblade. That's right. The fucking Creek X Keyblade. Uh, speaking of Cross, we got some updates about Guilty Gear Strive and Crossplay. Oh, yeah? So the location test has been going on and some new, some interviews and some new information has been coming out. So right now as it stands, Guilty Gear Strive has Crossplay between PS5 and PS4.

They did get heavy feedback on their last survey about people demanding PlayStation to PC Crossplay. It would be nice. Yes, and according to the translations of an interview that was recently held, they're working on it, but it's very difficult. Oh, cool. There are many problems that need to be overcome, so it can be added to the game. At this time, we've decided not to implement Crossplay on release.

We are, however, looking at implementing it in the future. So hope you can support the game as we're working towards Crossplay implementation. So they're working on it. Well, that's nice. Yeah. Everyone needs to get on the level of Power Rangers Battle for the Grid. Crossplay across all platforms. Yeah.

Also alongside that were some footage, drops back like just like you back in the day. We got some over the shoulder camera footage of matches and we're seeing changes. Naga Ryuki got touched. Oh no, Leo's ruined. Leo got touched. Potemkin got touched a little bit. Oh, what they changed on Pot?

Pot's 2P is now slower to like mash and the hitbox on it has been, or the hurt box on it, or no, the hitbox has been reduced. So basically it stops around his knuckles as opposed to the tips of his fingers. His 2P? His 2P? Isn't it his, I think his crouching like punch. You mean the one where he does like a prayer? No, the swipe.

The swipe? Oh, you mean his 2S? Is that 5P? 2S. Okay, excuse me. Sorry. Yeah. Okay, that's fair.

That's fair. Sorry. That thing went really far. Yeah, 2S. 2S comes out slower now if you're mashing it and then that has been reduced. I haven't seen any other changes on him. I'm not too sure what else there is with that, but that's the only one I saw a tweet with.

You could nerf Potemkin five, six times and he'd still be great. Yeah, he could take a couple, certainly. What else happened? Leo, the big one with him is now he used to be able to do the crossover, a like Wrecker attack into a hit confirm into a super. He can no longer do that and he could never do that in the past actually. That was new to this game and it was really strong. But that's no reason to say that like he's dead or worthless now because even though

that really good thing was taken out, what he does get instead of that is a like soft knockdown when he crosses over and then he has a five-way mix up. Not like a five-way mix up. No, it's a pretty strong thing to have. Exactly. Sorry if the language is getting a little lost in the weeds here folks, but the point is that there's some guilty gear strive changes and we're just talking about the specifics with each character.

So yeah, that Leo change is not going to cripple him because he gets something pretty good out of it still and Nagoriyuki, the bite has more damage and it reduces the blood gauge way faster. So like it does comparable damage to his regular throw now. So it's actually like pretty, pretty good when you land. It's not just a little bit and then the blood gauge just like almost instantly drops. You know, that's nice. It's nice. It's nice.

He also before he used to be a suicide by accident. No, it'll happen still. Excuse me. It's still going to happen, but now like you basically have the out's your fault. Yeah, but it's also like it's interesting because it's like it's not command grab as a like a reward for working and conditioning the person. It's if I don't command grab you, I'm dead. Ah, you know, like I'm not it's like I have to I have to land this grab or I die.

You know, and I would I would like it. It would be interesting if they if they gave him an anti air option on that so that he'd have to read your mind a bit at the very least because it's like, okay, he's going to suffer for this. So give him the ability to do a grounded version or an air version if he calls a jump out or something like that, you know, Spencer had that in Marvel, for example, where he has a ground throw or an air throw variant if you if you happen to hop up. And then they also made it so that his his little his awesome 5k the little the boot

the business boot, it kicks you further and further away now so he can only do it to you about twice instead of like a bunch of jungle reps. It probably drops some really strong combos away from his repertoire now. He can't do any of they really should like they should have nerfed Nago. They they he was way too strong. Yeah, yeah, lots of nerfs. He needed to be brought down to our level. Way down.

Indeed. So yeah, it's it's where there's some changes happening and it were still day minus 48. Right. So we will see what the final ends up looking like. But yeah, it's coming. Unless they delay it again. If they get out PC to PlayStation cross play in like the first couple months or like around the same time as like their their their, you know, first rollout of content, like, yeah, that'd be fucking incredible.

That'd be great. So that's cool. Um, before we switch over to the next story, I am going to have to take a small break as somebody needs to go outside very badly. I need to pee on my neighbor's lawn if you'll excuse me. BRB. All right. So I have I have emptied the dog.

Um, I forgot what I was saying, but anyway, next story is a pretty fucking big one actually. So someone is taking Apple to task because of the implication that they can buy movies or TV shows digitally lawsuit rules without actually fucking owning them. So and it's such an obvious one for all digital property that you can purchase. Like it's it's such a basic, but fucking important thing. Essentially, if you buy something through Apple services and it is downloaded, then yay, you have it. It's on your account.

That's good. You can watch it whenever. But if you buy something and then you don't download it and then that thing is removed from the services, you can never get it even though you bought it. And the idea that the licensing deals can effectively take away something that you've purchased means that telling someone they bought something, even though they didn't, is a lie and that it doesn't meet the definition of the word buy. So this lawsuit is basically potentially going to set a precedent for what it might mean

at the very minimum to have services like this, where you purchase your digital content, lead to one where they have to host it for anyone who has bought it going forward, even if you can no longer purchase it new. Sue Konami to get PT back. Or if Sony kills their their PSN at any point in the future, if you have a PSP go when you've bought games on it, you should still be able to go and redownload those games. Yeah, in theory. I want Apple to lose every lawsuit.

Even lawsuits there in the right end, I just wish they would lose those. At bare minimum, I don't necessarily think that this applying to them is something that comes back to every other company that doesn't do this, but it would be nice if like this type of thing were to start becoming more widespread, because yeah, like a purchase of something digitally, you know, it shouldn't be like like the idea that you download it and preserve it is nice, but they shouldn't be able to take to delist it and then remove or revoke effectively the purchase that you made says says buy on it.

Now they read now they can in their eulahs and and, you know, agreements define it to be whatever they want, but if I'm not mistaken, in court, they've already also had cases where they're like, yeah, but no one actually reads those. Therefore, it's not fair to actually eulahs are not legally binding. They're not legally binding because that exactly like it. They're just a single step to get in your way on the way to lawsuit. Yeah, or are not and have never been found to be legally binding. Right. And so the alternative is for them to change the word buy to lease. Oh, yeah, I'm sure that would really help sales, wouldn't it?

That would tank every digital market. Yeah, because Johnny, whoever is going to go, what the fuck? I used to buy these. What do you mean you lease it? It's it's a closer step towards actually owning the digital thing you bought. Now, if they go out of fucking business and shut down, then, oh, man, I suppose, yeah, those servers would no longer host what you've purchased. Well, there's no one to sue. That's, you know what I mean?

You're to want to go over to Tim Cook's house and start beating on his knees. But that aside, yeah, when you buy something, you should fucking be able to come back and get it when you want it. Oh, I want to clarify something. When I said, I hope Apple loses all their lawsuits. People were like, even the epic one. No, I want them both to lose that lawsuit. I want the judge to be like, you're both dumb and have Tim Cook and Tim Sweeney.

Are they really both Tim's? Jesus Christ. Tim and Tim have to like take turns spanking each other with a paddle and full view of the court. Ass out. And they can only stop once one of them cries. Full red cheeks. Yeah. And also beforehand, they have to be shot up with drugs to make them super strong. Okay, okay.

But this would require a pretty elaborate setup, because at this point, you need a carousel of sorts that allows them to spank and rotate so that ass being blasted can be seen in full view of the court. It is not fair to the spanky to be exposed at that point. You need a rotating carousel that shows both asses being spanked. Yeah. And these guys are idiots. You could call them cocks.

Is that what you're saying? No, no, I wasn't going for that kind. But yeah, yeah, you're going for it. Yeah. No, I was really thinking more of like a lazy Susan. The lazy Susan of fate. No, just the one that you stand on when you're getting your ass spanked for your corporate misdeeds. New idea.

New idea. All right. You take Tim Cook and you take Tim Sweeney and you go to my old playground that had that like merry-go-round that had like just, you know, the bars and you strap each of them so that their ass is pointed outwards. Then you put it next to a big paddle. Then you get a motorcycle and you wrap a chain from the motorcycles back to the underneath and you wrap it right around.

And then you rev that motherfucker and you fucking drive off so they get into a death spin. So they don't get to to do the actual spank on each other. They just have to receive. No, gravity's doing it. Well, inertia is doing it. Right, right. Okay. So it's a baked in spank punishment carousel that automatically-

You're saying videos of people hooking up fucking motorcycles to those fucking things? No, but I believe it. Hey, do you think you'd be able to hold on with your own power? You're wrong. Yeah, no. I used to, in Grenada, there was a playground near our house and it had a, not a merry-go-round. It had a, well, it's not a carousel. What did we fucking call it?

I forgot what we called it. I called it like a merry-go-round. Yeah, no, it was a merry-go-round. Yeah, I don't know. That was what it was. And like we would do the stupid thing of holding on for dear life. I got that clip super fast. And then like-

Oh yeah, I just typed in motorcycle merry-go-round and got the exact thing I was thinking of. So we did the thing where like five friends would spin it over and over and over until it's like impossibly dangerously fast and you're holding on for dear life. Yeah, I've done that. Yeah. Oh man, I'm glad there's a video of that so that I don't have to do it. You know, for some reason, like the battle between the Josh's is wholesome, but the battle between the Tim's is, is toxic.

Bloodsport. Josh's are better than Tim's. It's been confirmed by, by the recent events. Good on those Josh's. They raised a bunch of money for that hospital. And they let that little kid win. And they let that little kid win. The Josh that won is the best.

This fucking crown didn't even fit. Well, he got, he got treatment at the hospital they were raising money for. Are you serious? Yeah. That's fucking awesome. Like it's, it's a fucking win all the way around. Holy shit. That didn't even know about that vector.

That's another angle of win. Holy, yeah. Fucking damn. Wow. Yeah. That's, that's, that's some good, that's some good wholesome weekend right there. That's, that's great. Honestly, like, do you see those are the kind of vids videos where you're just like,

yeah, okay, I can, I can, I can fucking get me one of those, you know. A Josh? Yeah. One of them, one of them kid things. I got one right here. You got one right there. You got one right there. Yeah.

He stinks. Yeah. You know, every once in a while you see, you see something nice and wholesome and you just go like, oh man, having a kid there would be fun. That would be, that would be cool. Yeah. Like to have, to having a kid so that you can train him or her for battle to then go out and, and vanquish enemies with their pool noodle and then crown and have getting the

crown that's fucking badass and a wrestling belt that doesn't even fit. It's the rat of shit. I want one of those. Anyway. Um, yeah. Yeah. So your kid going to be named Josh. No.

How many rounds on the, on the carousel until the, the, the spanks are now doing so much damage that their ability to hold their bowels is no longer a guarantee. Long as it takes. Because at certain points that does happen. You know that, right? Long as it takes. You know that, right? You know what?

Yeah. You know what? Fuck it. Let's just flip it, flip it script. Whoever can go the longest without shitting wins the lawsuit. Uh, man, that was some old internet. I saw that picture. That fucking, that one burnt in.

That was, that was the, the formative years. I don't even know what you're talking about. Frat party. Someone grabbed the spanking plank and wailed in so hard that the, the flattening of the ass that's being spanked, like the dude's butt is just like pancaking because the, because the camera took the exact perfect frame and whatever like, it wasn't so much that the spank made him poop as much as it forced his butt out of the area where the poop was a second ago.

That's cringe, man. Do you understand? Yeah, I got it. He was standing there and it was inside of him. And then the skin was forced away from that area. No, I didn't like, like, like the poop didn't move. It's just everything else moved around away from it. Correct.

It's like, if you, if you put like a, like a, like a rope around my feet and like yanked me super hard and I vomited, but it's actually my food didn't move. Yeah. This is just my body moved away from the food. That was an internet image at the dawn of the, at the dawn of the, the horrors from a long time ago. Yeah, you're right. That's not cringe. That's a different.

No, no, definitely not cringe. What is it? Well, is it based? Is that what you're going to say? It's neither based nor cringe. What? No, it's somewhere on the scale. It's not, not everything is based or cringe.

That scale fits all everything. No, no. I don't want to go back to that period of my life. I don't want to go there. I don't either, but sometimes like there are moments where you have to explain it or you have to break it down. Cause I was having, I was talking to a punch mom the other day and like, like we were having this crazy ass discussion, right?

And like, and I was, and like about how, um, oh yeah, just about like, um, um, fucking like, like eight koon and eight Chan and shit like that, right? Yeah. And like, and, and I was just, and just like to go through the timeline of branching paths of how each thing came from a thing and from a thing came another thing and you fork it all the way back. And I remember like, like, yeah, I was just going back all the way to like how so much shit that came from like, um, uh, something awful, you know, and, and like how

that was, and I was explaining how like, uh, even the concept of a let's play coming back from something awful. You know what I mean? Like there's so many internet forks that like you, you were either there for it or like you used something that like is directly inspired by that or like someone that made a site that was, you know, whatever. And I'm realizing as I'm describing this, because she's like, you sound like grandpa talking about the war and I'm like, oh my God, that's exactly what it was.

Yeah. Right. And then I just had a flash forward of, I'm like, I'm actually going to be at some point that old guy telling the kids like, nah, you don't understand. I was here for the start of the internet. Yeah. No, we're the last generation. There are members of pre-internet world.

I was old enough to have a non-internet upbringing and then it came and I saw how it all unfolded and I'm going to be talking about that projects with a library card. I'm going to be talking about the old days. Like it's going to be that literally the start of it all, you know. Do you remember when something awful like got that huge scam running where they printed all that fake money, but it had Sonic on it instead? Oh, hope you got 10 bucks, B-U-X. No, no, no, no, no.

Where you had to subscribe using that one 10 bucks? No, no, no. It was, it was just like instead of presidents, it was like, it was, it was like Sonic on it and it screwed up the value of the dollar for like a year or so. It was called the Sonic inflation. If you Google it, you can just go check that out and it'll tell you all about it. Oh, man. Wow.

Yeah, that was some shit, dude. Fucking. To this day. That was crazy. Yeah, like, yeah. Anyway, just I'm like, I'm like, I remember I was like, it branched out to the point where I'm like, Hey, remember like ebombs world and she's like, Oh yeah, I remember ebombs world. I'm like, fuck ebombs world.

Fuck Eric Bowman. Yeah, low tax kicked his ass. Fuck. Like, I'm not like, I'm not going to sit here and go, yeah, low tax forever. But man, low tax did in fact come along, punch him in the face and bang his mom. You know, that's that's how the story goes. That's that's right, Grandpa. Okay, let's head to bed that soon.

No, no, you don't understand. What's upon a time in the internet? There was a guy. Yeah, you didn't like him. Yeah, yeah. It's it's absolutely going to happen. And you know, I feel that way even every time I when I when I'm explaining like pre IGN, you had IGN 64 before IGN 64, you just had n64.com.

And then the Imagine Games Network bought it. But that was just that specifically an N64 website that had some of the first screenshots of Zelda that had been scanned directly from that early ass game pro. You know, or or like, yeah, Rooster Teeth is cool. But once upon a time, that was drunkgamers.com. You know, like that's true. These weird things of just like, who the fuck are you talking to old man? Like what?

Pre red versus blue, huh? Yeah, I remember like, man, you don't want to use Netscape. You want to use the Ask Jeeves search engine. That's always going to get you the good shit. Alta Vista dog pile. The fuck you doing, man? Dog pile compiles all the search engines together into one. That's crazy.

Yeah. Anyway. Um. So that's that that that picture with the with the ass paddling. That's that's history. Um. Anyway, I just disassociated for a second and like genuinely could not remember what you meant by that and thought you had gone insane.

Okay. Yeah. No, the all right. Speaking of disassociation. Uh, I think this might be this might take the cake as the single dumbest crossover. I think I've ever seen seven deadly sins cross stranger things. Collaboration. Oh, I saw it.

Yeah, it's not good. It's no good. The anime cast of stranger things joins seven deadly sins grand cross. I don't. Like sometimes you get these wacky moments where snake is talking to a palico and you go, that's crazy, but okay. Ha ha. You know.

And then there's just the most why. Why would you why? Who's this for? Anyway, you can check it out and there's a bunch of anime adaptation versions of the stranger things cast hanging out in this game alongside anime people. It's for the marketing man who thought of it. And then it just reminded me that like, oh yeah, stranger things was a thing. They kept going.

Did anyone finish season three? I don't know. That's a mystery. No. All they had to do was don't think. It's it's like all they had to do is the thing that was the most obvious thing in the whole world. But then you have a whole lot of actors that are like, no, but give us more though.

You didn't even need to do that. You could have just used all the same actors and cast them as different characters and have it be super weird. True. True. American Horror Story, American Horror Story. Yep. Same people recast a different setting.

Totally. That's totally fine. Yep. Um, oh well. It's equals for no reason. Anyway, that's a non thing. And then yes, last two bits of things here. I know that Virtua Fighter has been announced in Japan as something that is coming to the

PSN store. Virtua Fighter Esports. Esports is coming. But you just in case you wanted to, you could get Virtua Fighter PC right now. The Virtua Fighter V Final Showdown Unlocker is out and this modifies your PC installed copies of Yakuza 7 or like a dragon. Excuse me, uh, Zakuza 6 or like a dragon into just booting directly the 360 version of Final Showdown.

The weirdest thing, one of those games has the Japanese version and the other has the English version. It literally has the words Xbox live on the main menu because the whole game is there. All it does is when you boot up the arcade machine, it gates you into the versus mode. But, uh, you can just get the full thing, including the training mode, the tutorial system, like all of that shit is all in there. It's missing, uh, I think DLC, um, but like everything and online play, but everything else is pretty feature complete, although there's some bugs with like pause mode.

But, uh, yeah, it's in the docket here, but there's a link to a mod that you can, you can get going if you want to turn your copy of Yakuza into Final, uh, showdown. Please have the good netcode Sega for the eSports, please, please, please, I beg you, please, God. At, you know, um, you could probably get this thing going alongside, uh, Parsec, and you can get something decent out of that. Yeah, maybe. Um, and last, they announced a new character for Apex Legends named Valkyrie. And, uh, I don't know if you saw her backstory, but yeah, I did.

There's an eight minute short that introduces her as the daughter of Viper from Titanfall 2. Cool animation, except for holy shit, the child looks hideous. Like holy shit, I thought it was whatever, you know, um, so two things come to mind immediately. Uh, it's cool that they're tying in that stuff. I like that, and they know that that's the cool guy from the thing that we like. So yay, um, one, I'm going to assume that like one of her most expensive and final and final unlocks is her saying the line. You know, I'm guessing there's a fucking, did you put your hours in?

You can finally afford her saying speed is life. Yeah, that'd be great. Um, they also put out, uh, they're going to put out a 3v3 arena mode. That's not battle royale, uh, in the apex. Cool. Um, I mean, honestly, like there should be just, well, I, did they add, uh, uh, team-based, did they add team training, um, as a thing at some point at some time ago? Do I, am I, am I, am I remiss remembering an update where they added you the ability

to go into the training room with your teammates? I have no idea. Okay. They didn't. Okay. Uh, well, they should. Um, and then the other thing I was going to say about it is that, um, her whole backstory involves her like jumping in the, the Titan and, and like kind of like, you know,

Trashing it. Yeah. Fucking up Viper's chip. Um, and then, and then of course, you can't play as a Titan. And well, that's the thing is like, so she has this whole connection with like the, the suit and, you know, the pilots and all that. But, uh, when it comes to her entering apex legends, you're not, she's not going to get into a Titan.

So instead she's wearing a body jet pack Viper like, uh, thing, which is, I guess the best you can do, but God damn it. Like you want her in a Titan, you know, like, I saw that they were putting us in a three V three counter strike basically mode and I got really excited because I'm an idiot and thought that they might actually do something cool. Like put Titans in it. No, they're making her. It's actually, it's actually just, it's actually just the regular game, but counter

strike now. Yeah. So, um, she's got, yeah, she's wearing a North Star backpack. Exactly. It's, it's, uh, that's all there. I mean, look at, if they, if they introduce someone that holds a sword and does all the sword core stuff, that'll look cool, but that's not, that's not the point. You know, I don't know, man.

Like I saw it, like I was scrolling down Twitter and I saw the fucking phrase apex legends trailer North Star and I went, oh, and I can't help but think that like also this is a world right where, um, one generation ago, you had the craziest giant robot battles ever. Um, and now we're tuning into these human gun battles. And like it's like, but, but literally the people watching this saw rather shit happening outside their fucking front lawn, you know, like just like 10 years ago almost like some pilots are basically Jedi and they're so cool and we're stuck playing as stormtroopers. But like the fantasy of this apex legends, like in world challenge thing is like, no, but,

but people saw cool Titan battles. They'd be way more into that. You know, it happened barely a couple of years ago. The longer this goes on, the more I'm confused as to why they even bothered to say it was in the Titanfall universe at all. Like you could just, you could just literally have just not said that and changed nothing. And people would be like, oh, cool, the Titanfall gun is here. Unless they come up with like, and after the war, Titans were banned forever.

That's literally what it is. The war is over. So. Meanwhile, steam is having like its best Titanfall two week ever. Um, anyway, speaking of robots, if you want to see a cool one, I retweeted the hottest Megatron I've ever fucking seen. It's a cool toy. I'm going to look at that.

Look at the toy. I'll look at the toy. It's the flame toys, Kurokira, Transformer, Megatron. It's Megatron, but he's also like got Gundam bits on him. It's fucking sick. Oh, that's a cool Megatron. Yeah. Um, yeah.

All right. Well, Ace Attorney, great and great Ace Attorney was announced. That looks good. Herlock Shomes coming at you. Yay. Also, people thought that like we invented that name when it's like, no, that's what knighthood used and that's what our Saint Lupe uses. How to say long standing real thing.

Yes. Anyone who doesn't want to deal with Arthur Conan Doyle stuff just uses Herlock Shomes. Hey, I have a statement to make. Hey, the, the, the estate of Arthur Conan Doyle can go to hell. That's Sir Arthur Conan Doyle. That's my statement. Okay. Hey, by the way, heads up.

If you want to play the great Ace Attorney right now, you can buy the Japanese version on Amazon and it's in English. Oh, wow, really? You just switch it to English. Wait, dubbed to? No, it's not dubbed. Because the new version is dubbed. Oh, the whole thing is dubbed?

Yes. Go check the trailer out. I didn't. I thought that was only little bits and pieces. Is it not? The trailer was in English. They had multiple lines of talking, including that part where they also had the parts where they were talking and they were going.

Like the, the, the Edgeworth dude goes, you Niponese truly are a fascinating breed. And I was like, whoa, Jesus, dude, game is dubbed. Wait, no, I'm literally watching the trailer and they have no dialogue. And like the, like as the, as the text goes on the screen. Is it a full dub or is it like a, like a, I watched a trailer for the great Ace Attorney Chronicles in which the characters were talking the whole time. I have no more information besides this. It's the one that came out on April 21st.

I don't know. I clicked play on a video. I wasn't looking at the date. Cut scenes will have dub. There it is. Cool. Yeah. People are, people are insane.

This is not a full dub. Cut scenes will have voice acting. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Like, okay. All right. You're, you're all fucking crazy.

It's not a full dub. You fucking psychopaths. So then it, their sound bites are dubbed. Okay. So the trailer just prominently featured those, those moments. Got it. Okay. Then it's a dub, Pat.

It's not a full dub. If it has no voice acting, you fucking moron. All right. Anyway. You got any emails? Yeah. Let's grab them real quick. Yeah.

No, Ryu and Chunli have been available as Power Rangers in that mobile game when we reported on it last year. And now it's available in a battle for the grid, but we did, we did talk about this more than once. Yes. What do we got over here? Hey, if you want to send an email, send it to castlesuperbeastmail.com.

That's castlesuperbeastmail.com. Okay. Okay. What do we got over here? Salutations to Willie and Pat. This one's coming in from Duff and says, correct me if I'm wrong, but game studios live and die by their reputations, except when they're owned by EA or Activision.

Bioware used to be a golden standard for RPGs in the early 2000s, as did Bethesda and Blizzard. Now these companies are generally universally reviled. With each new game announcement being met with great doubt regarding the quality of the end product due to severe lack of trust from consumers, what are some good examples of game studios and franchise that have gone downhill hard? And is there a period of time you can point to where the decline noticeably began? Okay. Well, first of all, you're too tapped in.

The average consumer doesn't even know that those game companies have become shit. As for noticeable decline, I think the easiest one is look at every studio that's ever been bought by EA. Up until death. Look at Activision buying Blizzard. Activision buying Blizzard is the most extreme. It went from like better than Nintendo to subpar. Let me take a look here. I feel as if

you can draw a direct line between Rare and its acquisition by Microsoft. Because at bare minimum, it went from games I cared about to a lot of things I don't. But Rare had tons of shit going back to the fucking early 90s. And then they got bought by Microsoft. And then it kind of just became a bunch of connect shit at a point in time. Okay. I want to... October 11, 2007 is when Bioware got bought by. So here we go. Yeah. Mid 90s, KI, Donkey Kong Country, Donkey Kong, etc.

007, Diddy Kong Racing, Banjo, Jet Force Gemini, all that stuff. Perfect Dark, Star Fox Adventures. You move forward further. And then we get into the Microsoft era. Viva Pinata, Nuts and Bolts, Connect Sports, Connect Seasons 2, Sports Rivals. Dude. Oh, the Mass Effect, sorry, the fucking Bioware one is like, it defies belief. Killer Instinct, what the fuck, why are they, that's not...

Okay, Bioware releases like Baldur's Gate, MDK 2, and then Baldur's Gate 2. And then Neverwinter Nights, and then Kotor, Jade Empire. And then Mass Effect comes out like a one month after they get bought by EA. So it was obviously done, right? Their next release is Sonic Chronicles, The Dark Brotherhood, a year later. Which we all know is a real banger. And then Dragon Age Origins finishes development in 2009. And that was halfway done when they got bought.

And then you go to Mass Effect 2, Dragon Age 2. Dragon Age of Legends, The Old Republic, ME3, that Warhammer game that never went anywhere. Like just instant. Would you say that reversing the trend takes, I would say it takes like two bangers, right? Has it ever happened? Capcom started cleaning up nice when they had Monster Hunter World, DMC5. So when you say the trend, I thought what you meant is like a bigger company buys them and they turn to shit. No, no, no, I mean, I mean, I mean, crawling back up.

You know, getting off, getting off your feet. Yeah, Capcom's done it like four times. Yeah, and then eventually into RE7 and then the rest of what's going on now. But like with each, like basically like Capcom with each of its major franchises, like just going heavy on them. Yeah, the Nenafune era was like just the absolute worst possible. I mean, look, man, I still really liked the, you know, the last Strider game. I thought that was really cool.

Yeah, I liked it. But there was a whole lot of nothing happening around then. And I would say that, yeah, they fucking, they crawled their way out, you know? I mean, Street Fighter V right now, rollback aside is in a pretty, the best place it's ever been. You know, real talk. Rollback aside, it's in the best place it's ever been. So I took a look at Activision buying Blizzard. And 2002 and 2004 were Warcraft 3 and World of Warcraft.

And then the next game they released after being bought by Activision was Starcraft 2, then Diablo 3. So like, there you go. Instant, like not not like Starcraft 2 was fine. But it was like not. And then Diablo 3 was. The Hearthstone Heroes of the Storm Overwatch. And then all the shitty WoW expansions.

Cool. And let's take one more here. York asked, dear Mr. Super and Mr. Beast, now you're playing the game. Which one do you want to be? Mr. Beast. Okay, I'll tell, yeah, I'll live with that. One particular type of game that I adore is when I believed you reached the ending, but it turns out you're only at the halfway point.

But the game still keeps its momentum and engagement. Obvious examples, Nir, Automata, Dragon's Dogma, Chrono Trigger, and Cross, Okami, Monster Hunter. Is there a particular- Okami does it twice! So here's the, but there's a note to that. So is there a particular one that you think pulled it off the best or the worst? York, here's the thing. I'm going to say that I feel like probably my favorite is the way Nir does it.

But also 999. Which one? Original Nir, Gestalt. Wait, you played 999? Yeah. If it's fucking great. Never talked about that. 999's the fucking best!

Yeah. 999 is probably my second favorite example of doing that completion system. The thing is, and we're going to find this happening now very clearly, there are times when the credits rolling should probably just say end of chapter one. End of act A. Yeah. Or something. Because just to catch those who put the controller down and walk away and go,

well my job here is done, you just change that terminology ever so slightly to imply that, hey, new game plus is not new game plus, it's just chapter two. And you save those people. I don't know, I'm a big proponent of the way that Automata did it. Automata might be the bluntest I've ever seen. It gives you the message, right? You get ending A and a message literally comes up from the staff that says, hey guys, there's way more here, please keep playing through to get more endings.

We would really appreciate it as the developers. And it's like, if you don't take that seriously, you're an idiot. Yes, but you could also just write end of act one. And it would communicate the same thing effectively. Right? Instead of even reading the paragraph, you just go end of act one. Credits roll, cool. The get act two.

Monster Hunter gets away with it because when you hit the credits, like you literally like load into the area, like the hub. And there are characters with exclamation points above their heads. And you talk to them and they go, now you've unlocked four star. And you're like, oh, okay, right. Mm hmm. The all time greatest, I would say is Final Fantasy six. Final Fantasy six definitely gears up like it's going to be the end of the game.

And it sure isn't. And I never, I don't, God, I like when something is compelling in that way, but I've talked about, I guess the persona four and five issue of making you fucking, just like making you think you're on the cusp of ending for hours and hours and hours and how that doesn't feel good. Right? It doesn't. If you feel like you're going to conclude once and then, oh my God,

shit blows the fuck open. That's one thing. It's it's good, maybe once or twice, but eventually you got a nut. And P four and P five, like it got to a point of like, I love this game, but come the fuck on, guys, you know, just like. Come on. Or or like, just be super outright honest and be like, this calendar is not real. You know, just just one of the two.

Yeah. Yeah. This isn't what I meant when I said this game was edgy. Yeah. Yeah. Big edge. Cool. Thank you.

That's why some people, when they walk away with their balls all blue, they have a really negative view of the game. Negative edge. Because they end up and no, because they end it. What is that? You really? It's when you kegel so hard and you keep it in, but the negative edge is the release. What is that?

Like a retrograde? Because don't do that. You can get your dick sick doing. Oh yeah, for sure. It's, but it's the button release. It's the release check. Don't retro. Don't negative edge your ejaculation kids.

It'll fuck your dick up. Right. Now, do you feel it on button press or on button release? That's the question. See you next week. I don't want. Yeah, see you next week.