Castle Super Beast - CSB 214: Babby Is Formed

Episode Date: April 11, 2023

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Are. Did you fucking die? Are you ascending to heaven? I am once again ascending to heaven. This is like when I had the light coming through me and hitting me in the fucking face. Yeah, you're ascending. There's lots of light in in my studio. Oh, it's Easter.

It is Easter. Did you die over the weekend? There's there's there's there's lots of light coming from the front and from behind me. So it kind of like has there's two walls that are just like blasted with light. That's fantastic. Yeah, I can see you clearly. There you go. So how's how's your week been going? Newly homed wooly.

It's going. So there's definitely once again, there's tons of renovations going on. Construction is happening like on top of me in every direction. So hopefully you're no one's going to hear it because I'm attempting to noise cancel. And that's why your voice sounds slightly different. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So if you if it sounds a little bit off, it's because I'm trying to noise cancel because like there was some proximity between the the construction noises

in the last location. But here it's like really, really close because they're doing shit for this place. So you put in a you put in a toilet into your streaming couch. That's already good to go. Oh, yeah. Yeah. No, that's that's more than that's good to go. But the other stuff is being taken care of. So all this to say, I figure the trade off for voice quality to noise canceling was is worth it for jackhammering and yadda yadda.

So that's going on right now and no one's hearing it. So, hey, that's good. I don't hear shit, man. Perfect. I'll hear nothing. And yeah, I mean, to be honest, like I haven't had much of a week of things because as I said, I would get around to streaming if possible, but I was not able to because setting up and getting everything in place has taken up the entire week.

There was definitely a couple points where there's been like I talked about outlook changing, now I'm like cutting holes into drywall and like peaking at the the the stubs to the studs to see if there's like wires running on through the wood, you know, making sure it's safe to drill. It's it's it's yeah, it's going on. So there's just the last thing you need to do is go, I bet it's fine. And then power drill directly into the main and die trying not to die. And that overabundance of caution, it's been pretty funny because

my father-in-law has been like like he's a construction guy and he's been. He's just kind of like, yeah, yeah, it's fine. Just stick your hand in. You'll see the insulation. Move it aside. Try to feel for some wires and my fucking dad's the same way, dude. It's it's the worst. There's just a level of casualness where I'm like when I was, I mean, one, the little I know is that there's a lot of things that can go wrong

if you just start sticking your hand into wires and two, like insulation. And that's the thing is like in back in school, I know fiberglass splinters were a thing. We would work with fiberglass materials sometime. And when you get a fiberglass looks like cotton candy and it looks delicious. It fucking sucks. It's like a wooden splinter, except it's glass.

It's invisible and it's not coming out anytime soon. So I'm trying to not get any of this. We'll need to accommodate the new part of you. But like, yeah, so I'm just like, OK, I have a glove, but like ultimately is there a way to like avoid it for the rest of my. And they're like, yeah, it'll be fine. And it's like, OK, all right, I'll trust at that point. So I'm sticking my hand into walls and, you know, doing the whole thing.

But no, it's it's it took it took pretty much the entire week worth of setup. So I'm finally, I think, in an adequate starting position. I also bought I'm just like before we go too far, like there's something about the blue collar working man that like they're telling you it's fine and you're looking at their hands and their hands are like burnt and like missing little chunks here and there. Like my dad told me that I shouldn't be so nervous around the fuse box. Yeah, right.

Because I don't like to mess with my fuse box. I know that's not the most dangerous thing. It's like, dad, I watched you electrocute yourself taking the VCR apart because you were too lazy to unplug it. That and like we are using copious amounts of electricity to do these setups that are way more intense than the average little household with a little printer and a three eighty six. Right.

So did you I don't know if you know this, but back back before we were born, right, in Montreal, when when my dad was in his like 20s, the fire department once a year would come to your house and they would look your house over and determine fire hazards. And they would go, that's too close to that. There's no good exit here. And they would give you advice on how to do that. And with the advent of modern technology,

that process became totally pointless. Every I am sitting in a semi circle of fire right now. Yeah, I watched. I remember that process of like the fire code inspection slowly just became smoke alarm testing. Is the smoke alarm. Yeah. And they're just and they just kind of knock it. It goes your smoke alarm on. Yeah. OK, cool.

Check and move on. Like they don't they just don't even bother with that anymore. But yeah, absolutely. Like there is there's besides like all the power bars and shit that are set up and yadda yadda. I look at my setup. There are five computers up set up and running here. When I when we when we got the house, one of the things I was like,

I need you to check that the outlets in these spaces can pull what I'm going to need to pull because I'm going to pull a lot. Yeah. All at once. And still still when I turn that computer on, these lights are on, they dim. Yeah, no, it's it's a real concern with the power draw. And I'm not even done like as I'm going to install AC central at some point when the summer hits.

And I'm going to be there's going to be all kinds of power draw situations to figure out here. So yeah, we I just need to make sure, like at no point does like a computer explode. And then like everything else just goes up in flames. Well, so I have a piece of advice. So what you're going to want to do. I have these paper towels in case I eat food here and I get messy, right?

Or whatever. But what you want to do is you want to really wrap all your outlets in the paper towels, because that way, if there's a little spark or a fire, the paper towels will slow the fire down. Long enough for you to, you know, to get away. Perfect. Yeah. Yeah, that's good. I am now realizing that that is so hazardous. I actually have to stop and tell the audience.

Don't do that. That is a humorous anecdote joke that is not real. Do not wrap anything around your outlets with paper towels. It will burn your house down. Don't do that. Yeah. I also in the last place had the podcast area and the LP area, somewhat separate, but now everything is happening on pretty much the same breaker. You know, oh, yeah.

So we're pushing it. We're pushing it. And I'm still figuring out my my hot tub logistics. Yeah. So so we're going to, you know, it's good. It's going to it's going to be a bit risky. But either way, are you do you think you're going to have time to be streamed this week? Yes. I in fact, I'm going to have to because I agreed to some contractual stuff well in advance of this.

So I am going to be doing some streaming because I better fucking get to it because you signed a piece of paper. I did sign a contract. Yeah. So the so there's going to be obviously the the picking back up of LPs. But besides Mass Effect and FF nine, I'm going to be doing a Mega Man legacy collection stream. You are. Yeah.

So that sounds like a great stream. You're doing that on Friday, April 14th. That's correct. That's a great day to do that because I will also be doing a Mega Man battle network legacy collection stream on April 14th. That I also signed a piece of paper for that I'm going to be doing. Yeah. So I'm going to go jump in on the battle network collection, figure out what's going on. I don't know anything about Mega Man Battle Network at all gave it.

I gave it a quick once over back in the day as a kid. And I was like, oh, they're doing Pokemon plus Mega Man. That's cool. And the designs are always pretty sick. But yeah, nothing really. The cartoon came on the air like as I was on the way out. So we'll fucking see. But the only thing I know is what zero and Mega Man play like in Onamusha Blade Warriors.

Yeah, that's it. No, I always I always thought it was a cool excuse to like redesign a lot of the old Mega Man characters and fucking here we go. We'll jump into this. OK, Pokemon or not, the point. There's a kid and he has a little buddy that's Mega Man. That on its own. Digi, man. It's sure, but it's it's it's not Mega Man himself running around

doing the Mega Man things. It's getting close to the remarketed for children thing. You know, you get the deal. I get it. I played one step from Eden, which is like a like a spiritual successor to those. Yeah, yeah, game play wise, game play wise. One step from Eden is fucking. Yeah, but I did that without knowing what Battle Network

was, so like I'm going back in time. It's going to be very strange. Yeah, like. God, OK, game play. No, no, stop, stop. Just move, just move on. It's like, you know, exactly what I mean. What I say that you fucker, what you mean, you know, 100 percent.

Don't be a fucking together. There's no one else here. There's no one else here. Complete just anyways. So that's going to be happy. And then the kid and Mega Man, they they kiss. And it's a whole thing and zeros there. And then they murdered Sonic the Hedgehog.

Yeah, right. There you go. So anyways, there's there's that going on. And then on Saturday, it'll be the indie fighting game festival. So. Oh, right. Yeah, you mentioned that last week. Yeah, that's happening as well, promoting a bunch of different indies. Tons and tons of them. Some stuff that's not out yet. So we're just going to just do a variety of them.

Jump on, just stick stuff in and see how it fucking plays. And yeah, games. Overall, a good, a good weekend for jumping on some indie fighting games. So come check that out as well. I'm going to post a schedule up once I get a shot. Yeah, fantastic fighting game news this week, actually, like really good. I'm very excited. But we'll talk about that later, obviously.

Yeah, but but not a ton else. Just going to just going to try to resume where we where we left off and give this new setup a swing, see if anything falls apart. And that's pretty much it. So, I mean, something's going to break. Something's. Oh, yeah, no question. But like, let's let's hopefully it's small and I can fix it live. And then the big the big problems will come deep after four or five sessions.

You know, that's that's how it goes. So yeah, like there was a there was a really fascinating. I don't know if you saw it on the subreddit. It's like, hey, why do old videos have so much audio desync? Oh, I just want to die. I just want to die. You see, sometimes you'd think that clicking record at the same time on two devices and then stop at the same time would create the same length file.

But that's not what happens. And sometimes that file is off by multiple minutes. And sometimes you go, well, I know what I'll do. I'll do claps or I'll move the the controller in the game with my voice. And then that'll sync up. And then you do one at the beginning and one of the end. And they're 10 minutes apart. You're like, that's weird.

It doesn't seem like there's a 10 minute gap. Oh, right. That's because there's a one third of one second gap. Four hundred times at random. Sometimes when you go through doors or the screen goes black. I'm rates, time gets erased. So, yeah, that's just that. That's why you get those problems and we compensate for them.

I do it. It's one of my favorite things about streaming live because the nature of streaming live is like, no, it is. It is synced up because it's live. Yeah, I have to slow. I have to slow your voice down by 0.0997 every week, practically to match our six up. Yeah. Are you are you fucking our sinks are not in sync.

I have to I have to actually adjust it constantly. Oh, my God, I hate it. Two wave files. Same thing. My computer is running at one one millionth of a different speed than your computer. Well, the yeah, there's the sample rate. And then there's the fact that like just the the the file that gets anyway, whatever, there's a whole thing to it.

But once you once it exports, especially when we used to do like when you're doing anything at 60, like, yeah, you might just get that little little bit trimmed off, you know, it makes me it makes me like. Ball up my little tiny man fists and shake when I look at, you know, an editor, video editor, I mean, not like a person. And I see like, hey, you ready to do it? Sixty or do you want to export at fifty nine point nine seven because some dipshit twenty five years ago decided that

this shit shouldn't be a bunch of whole numbers. It should actually be a bunch of bullshit. Oh, wonderful. Yeah. Yeah. Always fun that that's going to be the legacy forever anyway. So yeah, not much of a week to really describe besides just how shit and and so on. But making my way through the last of us, you know, shout outs, Nick Offerman for that incredible episode.

That episode is so good. It doesn't need to be part of the last of us, though. That's of that's a proper San Junipero in the middle of the the the season. Episode three, that is the one that everyone's talking about. And I was like, oh, yeah, everyone's been talking about this. Let's go see it. And it's like, oh, yeah, they've completely and utterly changed everything about Bill, but it's all for the better.

And it like instead of like creating yeah, instead of creating a change of gameplay pace, you create a change of story pace of tone tone. Yeah, I thought I thought the the the real that it was really fascinating because like Bill isn't just different. Bill is totally inverted from his game counterpart, like complete opposite. The the message he gives and leaves is the exact opposite message compared to last time.

Yeah. And like that seems like a really weird choice because it's it's so thematically inconsistent. But then as I thought about it more, I'm like, well, Bill in the original was like, be good to the people around you and care about them. Because if not, you'll they'll leave you and you'll be left with fucking nothing and you'll be a miserable bitter, bitter fuck. Yeah. Right. And in this one, it's appreciate the people that you love

so that you are happy. And it's like it's the same message, but it's all carrot and no stick. Like Bill in the game is a warning. And Bill in the show is like an aspiration. There's a thing to it as well where spoilers, I suppose, if you haven't seen the show. So just we're going to spoil the third episode. But yeah, the the the end of it, too. I was kind of curious because I was like, are they going to set things up

so that he goes with Frank, right? And when they did, I was like, huh, but he's such a survivalist. He's such a I'm going to go through all the lengths I can to always make it. You know, like to do that on your own is such a crazy, intense thing that so many people can't do that. It's like, oh, like, is he actually going to? And it's like, yeah, he does. And that just makes it even more of a powerful statement, right?

Like surviving to Bill is way more important than it is for most people because most people couldn't bother, wouldn't bother to do all the shit he does to make it. And then it means that much more when he gives it up, you know? It's a it's a fairly consistent scene that you see in a lot of post apocalyptic stuff, and it's like survival isn't enough. Like, like just making it, having just having food shelter is it's not enough. Like humans are social creatures, isolation screws us up. And we have this darn desire for some kind of higher meaning or purpose

or what have you that is just always getting in our way. Darn. Yeah. And I kind of I really do appreciate the the the casting as well, because it feels as if like Nick Offerman could have walked right off of Parks and Rec into that basement. He really feels like that a lot, right? Like he really has like like that. There's the moment where like the government is all Nazis and just like fuck you.

You it's like, well, yeah, they weren't there. Government fucks, you know, now, like absolutely. Like he just he just walked straight off of the set of Parks and Rec into that basement and became Bill, you know? So that was that feels like a very deliberate cast. Anyway, fucking excellent on that. Also, as well, the the I guess like not just the expansion of how his backstory is really great, but like the like the twist in the letter,

you know, is it's interesting in how it's complicated by mentioning tests there as opposed to just if I'm not mistaken, it's just like you just kind of have Frank hung and then the letter from him, right? Yeah. And the and the letter is, Bill, fuck you, you piece of shit. Right. Yeah. It's so much more. I'd rather risk my life and die than spend another day in your bullshit. Mm hmm. Mm hmm. Yeah.

It also admittedly, though, like the world of Bill, Biltown in Last of Us the Game is so much more neurotic and insane. It's a fucking it's an overrun trap filled shit. With just, yeah, with the fucking, you know, zombers everywhere, locked in cages and pens. And yeah, you're like tripling. It's madness. It's kind of insanity, to be honest. And here you're being pictured.

You're being given a more like a slice of Americana, apple pie, survivalist community. That's not a community. It is a libertarian fantasy. Yes, yes, yes, yeah. With the flag of don't try. I'm going to have the whole town myself and this and that. And I'm going to I have my generator like that.

That is that is like outpost survivalist pornography. The first like 15 minutes like him in the basement, setting up the generator, putting up the fucking fence, the pure homestead and then the outside barrier. Whereas like in the game, it's just like crawling through nonstop landmines. Yeah, yeah, yeah, still though. Yeah. And like he's he's living in like a like you you find him in the church,

which where he spends most of his time. But like when you leave the church to go to the rest of the level, there are clickers like less than 100 feet from the door. Like it is it is not a safe location. It is a safe plot of land and four walls. And and it also feels like I get like the idea in the game is that like only he can really make it through, you know, if because he knows where everything is and how everything is set up.

But like to anyone else just passing through, it just looks like lost land, you know? Yeah, no, but still really, really good episode, really well done and a very nice way to establish, hey, we're going to change shit sometimes. And when we do, it's it'll hopefully be for the for the best, right? Previous conversations, not withstanding. Yeah, so making my way through through through that slowly. Anyways, this is a complete non sequitur, complete idiot question for you, Wally. But when somebody says they're making their way through something,

does your brain just autoplay like making your way downtown? No, or is that just me? No, my brain goes making your way in the world. Today takes everything you got. Oh, yeah, OK, yeah, all right. So OK, I'm seeing it. But but like I'm not crazy, right? Certain phrases just like autoplay music

because it's just a phrase that's you associate with it. Yeah, OK, I go I go in that direction instead. Anyways, yeah, not much else really. So tune in this week, hopefully, yes, actually back to schedule. So check my Twitter, Wally versus you guys will see what's going on. I hear that Mega Man Battle Network Legacy Collection is the best game ever. I hear good things about. I heard a great thing one to six.

Yeah, it's actually. So here's the one thing. It's actually more than one to six because there's multiple versions of like three, four and five. I think you're right. So there's actually like 12 games in red and blue. Yeah, like the Pokemon, like the Pokemon. All right, well, you had a short week.

Well, no, you have the same length week as everybody else did, but whatever in terms of in terms of time. Luckily enough for the podcast listener, I actually had a huge week in terms of content to describe. First of all, beat dredge dredge is incredible, a plus. Yeah, nothing, nothing to add from anything I said last week other than I crawled over the finish line. Both endings fantastic.

I think I prefer the bad ending. OK, because it feels like more appropriate to have it all go to shit. Are the conditions based on decisions throughout the entire run or last? The the the decisions are, did you? Fit, did you beat the game normal style or did you go talk to one guy and be like, maybe I should go beat the game a different way and then go do it? OK, and when you start either of those processes,

the game goes, hey, we're disabling auto saves. The game will not save after this point. You are free to continue playing the game as normal after you get the ending and see the credits. So I went and I just bang bang boom, knocked out the two endings in 15 minutes and then went and finished up, you know, getting this fish here and that fish there and calling it a calling it a day on it.

Excellent super game, excellent, good, good, fantastic dredge. OK, a plus thumbs up, like, definitely up there for like indie game of the year kind of thing, like it's fantastic. Can't say it have nothing bad to say about it at all. Like kind of like high five rush where it's like if you were using like the perfect system of like until complaints happen. Nothing. Yeah, absolutely nothing. No, I bought that right away after after last week's description

and then the trailer looked phenomenal. Let's see, what else? Mercenaries came out for RE4. Hooray, it's a free download. And it also came alongside like a wildly absurd amount of disgusting, fucked up DLC that is like weapon upgrades for cash, for real human cash that is extremely analogous to

the Red Orb packs in Devil May Cry. OK. Right. And so Mercenaries comes out and Mercenaries is fantastic. It's a modern version with the new system of the old Mercenaries. There's currently three levels, four characters. There's going to be four more characters and another level. Um, it is the line between Devil May Cry and Resident Evil has never been so thin. So Krauser, I don't know if you've ever played the old Mercenaries,

but Krauser had like the knife, the Uzi and the bow and arrow and he could do like a plug, a smooth. You could do like a blade arm move. I've seen and heard about the the crazy level of action, like looseness that that it gets. So Krauser has like a five hit knife combo with dashes from side to side and backflips and his knife combo has super armor on it and does way more damage

and you can fight the Mercenaries mode with just his knife. Oh, and then when you fill up your super gauge, you transform into boss Krauser and start like doing a three hit combo with his blade arm, which looks exactly like Sparta. And then on the bottom of the screen, it literally says like hold aim and fire to Stinger. It is called Stinger. Nice.

And he does a Stinger. He does the full dash and it's the right distance to and it kills everything. OK. The other characters are all like a ton of fun, but he's definitely like the most interesting because it feels like you're halfway to a Devil May Cry game. But here's the funny thing about Mercenaries and they put out that DLC, you know, the the cheat DLC that you'd pay like eight bucks to upgrade a weapon.

So the hand cannon is the the traditional super weapon of RE4. And the way that you would get hand cannon in RE4 Remake is that you have to start a new game, no carrying over old weapons or bonuses, and you have to beat professional, which is a fucked up super hard difficulty mode. And you have to beat it in under five and a half hours, which is proper, proper difficult.

Like people were were like banging their heads at this and just struggling to get through it like all for past two weeks. Right. Mercenaries comes out and, hey, did you know that if you just S rank each stage once, it just unlocks the hand cannon. And S ranking those stages is trivial. It's it's it took me half an hour, non sequentially.

Yeah, non sequentially. You just do it. Well, that's more reasonable. Nice. And it's just like that. OK, piss easy, super easy, hilarious. So alongside all this mega gross DLC comes along like here's like the easiest way it's ever been to get the strongest weapon in the game for free.

They're going to be, I mean, the proposition of selling consumables like Capcom is going to just keep going in on that wherever they can, especially for the for the really good games. Like I just see it being something that doesn't go away. Oh, my mistake. I had one of the details wrong, which is the the the criteria I described are for getting the infinite ammo Leon Catboy ears. Oh, that the hand cannon is beat professional without bonus weapons,

which is still a significant endeavor. But yeah, no, Capcom is going to put out weird scam DLC. Two weeks after every game they put out now, apparently. But like, you don't need it. You really don't. Fucking first time I ever saw it was Fable to buy coins. Oh, my God, that's a long time ago. Or was it? No, wait, which came first? Was it Fable to or?

Not at Trianotasy, the Chopin one. Oh, my eternal sonata, what one of those two was the first time I ever saw that DLC. That was eternal sonata. Yeah, just just buy coins. And that was that was that was to Koei Tecmo, I think, Namco. I can't remember. Regardless, Marx is great.

Gets you the hand cannon. Super easy. The only thing I actually have to say is that mercenaries is too easy. Like it's it's it's like way, way too easy. Like not just getting the S rank to get the hand cannon on lock, but like it maxes out at like S plus plus. And like I I did that in in one stream. Like, bam, though, apparently,

the there's going to be a second batch of mercenaries content alongside the separate ways DLC, which apparently is going to be more difficult. So do these modes eliminate the need for a mercenary standalone game? We'll see when the second batch of DLC comes out that has a harder mercenaries mode. The gold standard is still like five and six because they had co-op as well. And they had tons of stages, but. The the the mercenaries in RE four,

not only to all the characters have different weapon layouts, but they all have like special abilities that are all completely different. So it's definitely the most interesting and like broadest of them all. OK. Like I would say that when RE five, if RE five comes out and includes like all this types of shit with co-op, then you don't need a standalone mercs game. But until they add the co-op to it,

now people people would still go for it. So the time to do that is in between now and five. Right. But then they would just reuse the assets for five. So they'd probably do it after five. And it's and it's also like it's a proposition at a proposition. It's a it's a it's a value add value proposition. Yeah.

So it's a huge value. It's a massive, massive, huge value add, particularly with five. So they said that that well, they didn't say actually people data mined that Wesker and to Ada Wong skins and a third Leon. Sorry, second Leon are going to be coming on the next batch. But who the fuck knows when that's going to be? Could be any time. OK.

So Mercenaries is fantastic. I have a huge list of shit here. Mercenaries is fantastic. OK. I played ever space, too. Do you know what that is? No. Do you know what free space is?

I've heard the name. OK. So there are very few games in which they give you a spaceship and then they go, why don't you fly around solar system and do little missions and explore space and then get into dogfights and trade items from one outpost to the next and have like a little space RPG. OK. And there are almost none of those and ever space, too, is one of those.

And it just came out last week and it's fucking great. Huh. This camera behind the ship, the way it rolls in pitches is very reminiscent of aces of the galaxy. Yeah. And it has to have the all it has all four camera options. That's third third person near third person far, no HUD at all and HUD from within the ship in the cockpit.

It's great. Cool. Like I spent time dogfighting and getting like Diablo style gear with, you know, the numbers and the colors. And then I went and did some of the story and then I went and did some space trucking. Is that just an X wing? Like, no, maybe it is. Well, like, maybe it is.

I mean, like X wing versus fucking tie fighter is a goddamn classic as his wing commander. So like anything that can give off those dogfighting vibes is welcome. Oh, let's see. Let me go to. All right. So have you ever? I mean, you've been you've been in this in this line of work for a long time. Wally, have you ever seen a game that everybody wants you to play and they're

everybody's really excited for you to play it and then you play it and you're like. A couple of times. It's happened a couple of times. It's a lot of people or get pretty disappointed when you're not into the thing that they pegged that you for sure are going to love. And then you're sitting there and you're like, I'm going to give this a fair chance. Yeah, I hate every single second of this. Yeah, I need to I need to see what's here.

So I bought pizza tower. Oh, no, pizza tower. Oh, no. Oh, man, there's so much excitement about pizza tower. There's so much excitement about pizza. Oh, and pizza towers wild because it's one of those things where I'm looking at it. And I'm like, what is this? This is like a throwback to something, but I don't know what the throwback is.

And so I go, what is the throwback? And then people in the chat start saying, well, it's a throwback to these cartoons from the 90s. And I go, I have never seen one of those cartoons. Yeah. And then they say, well, it's a throwback to Wario Land. And I go, I have never played a Wario Land game. The tackle running is very, very Wario Land as well as running through the pipes in the green world. The animation style is definitely got a little bit of Rocco's modern life to it.

Say I have seen Rocco. I have. It's got some of that. It's got like some of the crazier John K stuff, ripping friends and shit. I'm sitting there and like, well, I don't have any of the background. So I'm going to have to just go on it raw, like raw first impression. My first impression was this is the first game I have ever played on a computer in which it was so bright in terms of color. I had to do most of that stream with my sunglasses on.

There's like nothing is shaded. Everything is flat color, bright to the extremes, which is also an art style. I mean, if you think about how like Commander Keen used to look back in the day, right? It's it's it's it's also like that that style of sprite. Like I get what they're going for and they're nailing it, but it is unironically. I searing. I miss paint bucket. And and then I start to play it and I'm like, OK, this is from the Sonic school.

I've got to go fast jumps and and roles and wall runs are going to be perfectly timed to get the the good, you know, the good feeling. And I start to run into problems because the game that it wants to be is not the game that I want to play. So I'm like consistently slowing down to pick up all the items instead of screaming past everything to try and get a top time. I'm like hugging all of the walls to try and find where the secret rooms are, like you would in the Sonic or like a Donkey Kong game. And more than anything, by far more than anything, that game is the kind of game that has like a run button like has a button that turns you in a run state. And that run state has a lot of speed. It makes you mostly invincible, but it also has a huge amount of inertia and momentum. Hey, right.

So it's like you hit the button, you start running and if you hit like the other direction, your character will like slow down, turn and then speed. Up in the other direction, that kind of thing. And it feels really heavy. And I hate that. Like it is it is it is one of those games. Like it is it is one of the best examples of the of something that I describe where I pick up a game and I move five feet and jump once. And I that's going to decide whether or not I like it or not. Can you and in this case, I'm like, oh, it feels so heavy.

Can you blast through the levels like like just as quickly as possible and then immediately replay it to collect? Yes. OK. And collecting items is only for score. And it does do something really cool, which is when you get to the end of the level, it wants you to run the level backwards as fast as you possibly can because a big pizza monster is going to eat you. OK. But on your second playthrough of the level, you can run it so fast that when you get back to the entrance, there's a teleport which brings you back to the end of the level for a second lap to do it again. Whoa.

So that like to get extra points. So it's like, are you are you confident enough enough to not only sprint this level, but sprint it twice within the timer? Um, so that's really cool. And like all the all the like all the mechanics to it and all the way that it works. I'm like, that's really cool. I bet you could get really good at this and you could just do really well and get great times and feel great. And the art style and the boss design and the crazy good music like like you remember how you felt playing Meat Boy and you're like, I could play this fucking level forever because the Meat Boy soundtrack is so good. Nice.

Definitely that is happening. Like the soundtrack is incredible. But I hate touching the game. Interesting. Every every act of movement and control was me going like, no, just like just not for me. Every every like shot of like a stretch of wall being destroyed into a like little like shine spark corner and then you go up a wall and then down a thing looks fucking awesome to me. Like that looks proper like, you know, Sonic momentum and then you kill a couple of things and then you blast off again. That looks pretty dope.

It's like I play Sonic games like a weirdo. I actually play through Sonic games and I like Sonic 3's platforming. I like the way Sonic feels when you move them and you like when you jump on a when you fall off something high and then you jump off of like you you pop like a box and then it launches you to fucking space. Like that's that's what I like that like if I had to pick one thing about the way I like Sonic's controls, it would be that. But yeah, no, it's like I feel bummed out because like everybody in everybody excited and in love for pizza tower and I'm just like. It happens everything about this game except the way it looks and the way it plays. Well, so I was going to say like the aesthetic of it definitely like you have to you. You don't have to have a connection to that, but it is reminiscent of a lot of that like old shit.

We mentioned that it's pretty cool if you if you do recognize that like I like I'm. I feel like there's an exact cartoon that probably comes super like close to what this looks like that I can't think of, you know. But the eyeballs bulging, the madness of the animation, the weirdness of the of the the different like ingredients. Cow and chicken, cow and chicken is really close in terms of character design, not in terms of and then you just you take that. But you combine it with yeah, Ms. Pate flat filled commander keen ass lighting and sprite work. Yeah, I'm going to. Yeah, let's go with cow and chicken on that.

It's and it's and I had I had like the incredibly, incredibly wild feeling of like, all right. I gave it my shot. I am I am absolutely done with pizza tower and then you close the steam window, right? And you exit out and you're like, and I only played it for an hour and 34 minutes. So back it goes. Interesting. I hope everybody like I hope everybody enjoyed the stream and thought about maybe buying pizza tower if they like what they saw. But I am definitely not going to keep it because I am never going to play pizza tower ever again.

Wow, ever. Wow. The full the full refund for me. OK, I think I think the funniest version of that is a million years ago when Matt and I bought and played umbrella core. Resident Evil umbrella core, the shittiest Resident Evil game that existed to do like a video for it. And we're like, we had a stopwatch like going to see if it's going to make sure we didn't go over two hours. Jesus, yeah, because fuck that. What I am surprised by is how when I heard about this game slash saw like fan art of it and stuff, it was being compared with Celeste and this is OK.

I can see that Celeste has a lot of collectible stuff. But Celeste has the Celeste physics feel good to me. I really like the way Celeste feels this like Celeste. You stop on a dime, right? Like Celeste is like you have hyper control and a double jump. But you're also not like this. You're not really doing combat. You know, no.

And whereas in in pizza, pizza warrior land tower, like you are supposed to be hitting that sprint and just never ever slowing down for any reason. And I'm like, I don't like that. I like to slowly explore the level and get the items in my 2D platformer. Yeah, OK. I mean, this is I'm sad about pizza tower. You may love pizza tower. I've it looks like it looks like a game.

I'd like it looks like a game I'd really enjoy. I'm also getting vibes of drill dozer from it as well. Like there's shit like that I'm super into. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I do feel like what you're describing kind of reminds me of like the start, the parts of how like high five rush progression bugged me, you know, like it's like just little, little, little things that like you're like, I wish I didn't, you know. But anyways, yeah, I'll have to I'll have to see what's up with it.

I really I will say that like out of everything, the music is is like. Like it's it's incredible. It's it has a fucking incredible soundtrack. This let's see. What else we got? Almost last but not least. OK, so I've talked a lot about Neo and Neo to and a fucking. Well, long on this podcast over time and way back in the day, Square Enix offered me

a sponsored code for Stranger of Paradise, which had like completely absurd conditions all over it and it like made me aware that the game starts with Frank Sinatra singing over it. Yep, I remember that. That was during the height of like the DMCA apocalypse and also I'm not going to get into it. I don't particularly care for Frank Sinatra's music. So it was it was just like this this slam dunk of things to to keep me away, which is unfortunate because the Kill Chaos shit is actually as as funny as it as you

thought it was and is contiguous. But I've been playing Stranger of Paradise because the Steam version came out and first of all, the Steam version ran like shit on my computer. Oh, and I'm like, this is bullshit. I have a fancy computer with new computer parts and why does why does video game run bad and then you get the really frustrating one where you look and people are saying like that's really weird, dude, I have a I have a significantly worse computer than you do and the game is running great for me and not like works fine on my machine.

Like you see that over and over and over like that's weird. I have a bad computer and the thing runs great. So I did some digging and discovered there is a reason why every now and then I run into games that run like shit on my personal computer, which is brand new, but really good on other people's older computers. And that is because of a phenomenon called an e-core. Are you familiar with an e-core? No.

So in 12th and 13th generation processors from Intel, very similar to hyper threading. I know you remember that from way back. They have put in a 32 core CPU that has eight performance cores, which are the really, really, really fast parts of the CPU and then 24 e-cores, which are basically cut down versions of the cores that are there to offload miscellaneous tasks so that the performance cores could go very fast, right? Well, games that are coded badly and haven't been updated since the release of 12th and 13th generation Intel CPUs go, oh, we'll just spread the CPU load across every core for whatever.

And then they dump the game onto the shittiest, slowest parts of your CPU, which lead to it stuttering like a fucking mess. And it's the same problem that used to happen when you would get a hyper threading CPU and all of a sudden games would just like fall to fucking pieces and you're like, why is it what? And you turn off hyper threading and all of a sudden like, oh my God, it works great now. So literally all I did was I downloaded a program called Process Lasso and said, hey, stranger

of paradise, I want you to be high priority for the CPU at all times. And all of a sudden it puts it on the right parts of the CPU. You had to get third party software to do that. Well I could have gone into my BIOS and turn off the e-cores and do that every time I wanted to boot stranger of paradise, but I didn't want to do that and then switch it back for everything else. Yeah. Okay.

I also discovered lots of other games have such a weird problem like Civ six does not like e-cores, for example, but regardless, have the game running very, very nice, pretty smooth. And what I've discovered is that it is by far the best of the four Neo games. Interesting. By far. Okay. Far and away, easy, the best one.

Now what right off the bat makes you say that? So you know how it's an infuriating fucking mess that the gear problem as it is? Stranger paradise has gear. It has tons and tons and tons of gear, right? And when you get to the end game, you are going to be doing like the Diablo, I'm going to run this boss 10 times so I can get all purples and make a build kind of thing, right? But what stranger of paradise doesn't have is equipped weight or stamina. So when you're in your inventory and you want to use the better gear, you hit the select

button and it just equips all the shit with the highest numbers because it doesn't have to factor in equip load or stamina. So in Neo, I would go, oh, I want to, you know, just equip the stuff with the higher number. Yeah. Well, equipping the stuff with the higher number in Neo also includes making sure that, oh, I have the right role. I have the right stamina requirements.

I can't go too high. So it's not actually just equip everything with the high. It's after every stage, go to the weapon, the highest number, then go to each different piece, the head, the armor, blah, blah, blah, and go through that process, right? At the end of the mission in Stranger Paradise, I hit the touchpad and everybody get the highest gear, fastest, good, go up. Excellent. Okay.

Good. So builds are not really a concern per se. It's just you get better equipment and that's it. So much like Neo and well, like builds aren't a, builds aren't like, uh, builds are absolutely a thing in all four of these games. But in Neo, like it's this thing of like, well, I'm still having to micromanage my inventory all the time, even though I can't make any builds because I'm not far enough into the game.

Right. With Stranger of Paradise, yeah, I can't make any builds because I'm not far enough into the game. So I'm going to hit the button that will just auto-equip the highest gear possible. And when I do get far enough into the game where builds are mattering, I'm going to stop auto-equipping and I'm going to make a complicated auto-dismantle system, which is also provided. And then I can work from there, but I don't have to spend every single mission micromanaging like my equip load.

It's, it's like, it had, it had me in this moment where I'm sitting there and I, I made a joke of it, but like, was stamina a mistake? And no, of course not. But for these types of games, yeah, actually, it totally is. Well, what you're describing is also way more in line with Final Fantasy than it is with, yeah, you know, like the other Neo like games. So if they're going to do something in the universe, I saw somebody sum it up perfectly, which is in Stranger of Paradise, the shallow end of the pool exists.

Like it, it is there. And so I can actually go through these levels, enjoy them, appreciate how every level is a Final Fantasy one nonsensical style tribute level to a different game. So you, you, you waltz into any particular level. And it's, it has some story justification like, Oh, this is a lot like dimension 14. This is a lot like dimension two. This is a lot like dimension 13. And it will happen to be a Final Fantasy one location that has been styled in the

version of a later Final Fantasy location. Like, I don't, the, the, the Neo stuff is like, it doesn't bother me. You, it doesn't bother me as much as it bothers you, but it is still something that when you think of, Oh, there's a particular skill I want to get. Let me go back through my copies of this armor to see if it has it on that one. Yeah. And I'm reminded of like how annoying that got in Transformers devastation, I guess, the platinum one with the copies of the guns and stuff like that,

with the minor, minor adjustments to the, to the its ability. And yeah, I, I, I imagine there are still people that love that kind of micro and are able to do incredible things with it. If everything you're wearing amps up something that you've already built your stats towards Stranger Paradise totally has all that. Okay. Right. Like you're, you know, you're making builds that have 8 million percent

crit damage. Yeah, exactly. Exactly. Yeah. If you do damage, it heals you. And if you do enough damage, you can't die, stuff like that. But you get there. You don't have to deal with the microcosm of the constant inventory management

on every level of every part of the game until you get there. Okay. Um, and also on top of that, in its just general system, like it feels, it feels like snappier and more impactful than the other three games in this, in this franchise series. I don't know what to call it. Are you leveling up individual stats in this as well? No, you're not.

There's only one thing you are leveling up in this game and that's your jobs because it's a fun, fancy game. FF. Yeah. So, uh, you're leveling up. Hey, I started with swordsman or marauder or, uh, Lancer and oh, I, I unlocked, uh, the end of pugilist and Lancer. So now I get to unlock Dragoon or sage or red mage or what have you.

And you're going down. What is essentially a spear grid? And at the, at the bottom of each of the spear grid is the, the node you need to unlock the next class. Uh, or the next job. And as you go down the list, you will unlock, oh, here's a new move that you can equip to an R one combo. Here's a new move that you can equip to whatever and switching jobs and

switching weapons is separated, which is strange. So if you say like the X, like crazy, right, there's actually like 10 different classes that can use the X, like Dragoons can use the X. You'll still keep jump. Jump will still be your job ability and you'll still get all the passives from Dragoon, but your actual like melee attacks will be the X moves. So you can mix and match it as you would expect from a final fancy job system. Okay.

Interesting. Yeah. Like when I was playing a black mage, I could play black mage with a mace and a shield. I could play back mage with a flail that lacks like a extending staff and a gun and you just get to keep the full weapon system for all those things. But R two, when you're neutral, we'll do black magic instead of whatever the class you would normally associate with.

It's great. Interesting. Yeah. It's, it's, uh, I guess another one of these cases where like they're like what they build is for a particular style of, of, of action game fan on their own. But when they get to cross over with another franchise, you can incorporate stuff from that franchise to like streamline the process or experiment in weird ways that you otherwise wouldn't, you know, like, like when you throw

Metal Gear into character action, you get the things that Revengeance does that the others don't, you know, interesting. So, uh, overall, yeah, super kind of like amazed with it. It's, it's stellar. I wish, I wish the world hadn't conspired to push me away from it earlier because I ran into this situation where I go, man, I'd really like to play Stranger of Paradise, but you know, the Neo Gear thing really, um, you know, is pushing me away.

And then I got the weirdest feedback ever, which was first response. Oh yeah, you don't have to worry about that. Just hit auto equip, whatever. Second response. It's the game that has the most gear and the gearing up is the most important. Like, what does that mean? And what it means is, is that those are both true, but unlike the others, it's actually a fairly clean sliding scale from when you start to when you end.

So, um, I have a friend who went through it and beat it on like hardest difficulty with the DLC and all the extra shit and like the final challenges. Yadda yadda. And he was basically telling me that the end DLC, uh, on the hardest difficulties, like requires you to master the build system in a way that is like, you have to have a broken character and you have to tweak it to be broken in the right ways. Yeah.

So, uh, the way the DLC in that game works is fairly straight. It works like Diablo, whereas like in Diablo, you beat normal, then hard, then, uh, inferno, then inferno two, then inferno three, then inferno four, et cetera, and the scales and the gear scales alongside it. Uh, and stranger of paradise, all the DLCs mandate that you beat them on the new difficulties that the DLC itself introduced, um, which includes breaking the level cap, uh, and doing all sorts of stuff. And it's like, okay, once you hit the DLC or post game, yeah, then you're,

then you're breaking it open. Then you are like, no, I need to make a busted, busted character, which is how the Neo DLCs were. But because of the way the auto equip works, I, I feeling this like nice, smooth gradient there, instead of just constantly being annoyed of that, I have to go through the goddamn equipment over and over and over. Like if you can make it as busted at the end as you want, I have played loot games in which I've had to make fucked up characters that are, are cheating the

game, but like the micromanaging of, of like trash equipment is infuriating. Like that, that's kind of what I want to get to. Like, yeah, Neo always had the same thing. Neo, you also want to make broken characters for the, the end of, for your DLC in the end of the game, but you start to micromanage gear that sucked and didn't have any cool on it. It was just constantly annoying. There is a cool thing when you take like a bunch of shitty gear and then you

fuse the, you fuse it down into your one that you like so that you keep these really good skills, right? There's something about that that is like, oh yeah, I'm making my thing better. And it has like a bunch of slots that I can improve. Yeah. There's, there's also, um, there's two other things. One is like, man, getting to one, to a Koei Tecmo game after the end of its life is so fucking wild compared to playing it at the beginning.

Like, I'm, I'm starting Stranger of Paradise up and people are telling me like, oh, it sucks. This game doesn't have, uh, you know, the ability to change your parents permanently. No, it does now. And then followed by that is like, hey, make sure you don't sell or dismantle the starting gear, you know, like Jack and Jed and Ash with their, their normal ass clothes. Well, because if you dismantle those, you won't be able to get them back

till the end of the game. Well, actually, no, at some point they made it so you can't dismantle them. So you can always make them look like that. And just little things here and there of like, oh, this is a substantially much, much better game than it was when it came out. Great bark of team ninja. It's, it's, it's great. The other thing, and this is for me, this is for me and, and, and people

like me, the game had a lot of, it had to, to action game, a lot of final fantasy abilities that have never been in an action game. Right. It has like 30 jobs. Like it has damn near everything I've ever heard of, and it needs to have move sets for all the different weapons. And so they went, okay, where are we going to steal animations from to get these action moves?

And the answer is final fantasy 14. So naturally what, when I picked up an axe in Stranger of Paradise and the axe three hit combo, I'm like, oh my God, that is butcher's block, a move that no longer exists in FF 14, but it did for six years and it was my favorite animation that warriors had. And then the, you know, tap forward and hit attack button. Oh, with the axe, it's a, it's a poke with the axe head. Like, oh, that's fracture.

Another move that no longer exists in FF 14, but here it is. Look, there it is. And this is across like move sets. This is across like job abilities. Like, and of course 14 took those from old final fantasy games, but then this one also took them from there. It's like, I feel like somebody took the thing that I really like, and then they took a big piece of it and made it into an action game.

Makes me excited. I imagine that like Team Ninja was just given access to a ridiculously massive library of animations to pick from for everything. Well, it's not, it's not the same animation. It's a, it's a completely new bespoke animation for Stranger of Paradise. Sremenis is. So they actually like, they looked at everything you could do in, in what have you, and then they just took the cool shit.

Um, and as a result, I'm constantly just like, Oh yay, it's that because it's, it's a tribute game. So I'm going to, you know, Palomitia Castle from FF2 and I'm doing a little clap because I, Oh, I know that thing and I fight Garland or the Black Knight or whatever. I'm like, Oh yay, I know that thing. And then I'm using abilities on classes that I currently play in 14, but done in a fancy big action game.

I'm like, Oh yay, I love that. And like, that's not the appeal, but it's nice to have everything's going to be referencing 14 for, for a long time because not only is it a giant is going to be, it's a giant repository of FF related content. It's also immensely popular and it had like the most effort put into it. And, and like it, it just, it would make sense for things to pull from that as much as they can. Like I just, I see that being a fucking template to pull from for a long time.

So that's more or less it for me this week. I played, like I played so many sequels, like pizza towers in a sequel and like Stranger of Paradise, technically isn't a sequel, right? But, uh, RE4 sure is. And RE4 is a remake of a sequel and it's a sequel in its own right. Oh, so like, I can't just, I can't stop thinking about sequels, particularly we talk about games a lot and how, and how like sequel seem derivative in most mediums, but like here they're fantastic in general.

And I started thinking a lot about like how I feel about sequels and like what my personal favorite sequel has been or what it could be. And I think I know what it is. I think my favorite sequel to anything would be me, a sequel to me. Where, uh, you know what, here, so you're setting up the bit. Go ahead. What I'm trying to say, Willie, is that I am going to be a father. And graduations, that is wild.

Holy shit. I'll admit, I'm a little shaky right now. Um, yeah, so we're going to have a baby and it's, wow, we are going to have Pat to the sequel that is a, not the final name. Okay. Don't junior it. We have a, we have a list, but we haven't fully decided on, but for now, we'll just go with the sequel to me.

Uh, hey, congratulations. That's, uh, that's one hell of a way to, uh, one up the, the move from yesterday, from last week, rather. So you want it? You want, so I, so now I'll be, I have a lot more to talk about this week. Holy shit. I was going to talk about it last week. I was sitting here, just kind of getting myself psyched up and then I

noticed you're in a different location and I'm like, and you're like, I moved. I'm like, well, I'm not going to do it now. I don't want to be that guy who wants to be that guy. Holy shit. Okay. What's going on? So this has been a long time coming. This has been, uh, the plan for many years.

Um, you probably remember, I used to be a guy who was like having babies as stupid. And people who have kids are dumb. I don't know what it is, but at some point I was in a grocery store and I saw some kid in a, in a little, in, you know, in the, in the basket going like, you know, doing the baby flail and like laughing and I went, oh, that kid's cute. And I went, oh, oh, there, oh, oh, there it is. Oh, and that was a while ago.

So let's see, moved out of Quebec to BC, lost a bunch of weight, started eating real healthy, uh, got this separate office so that you guys can't hear anything if there's anything in the house. Right. So that like, basically all of these things have been, uh, like prep for, for a long time, like this has been, uh, and, uh, so we, we made the decision. We're going to, we're going to start, right? Where everything's ready.

We're going to start the process of having the baby and, uh, wouldn't you know it first shot, first try immediately, immediately. Congrats, congrats. That's crazy. We're, we're, we're, it's the, it's the month that we started trying. And Paige is sitting there and she's stealing food off my plate. She is just grabbing it. She is just, just taking it from me and eating it.

I go, that's weird. And then she went to mop the floor and then looked at the dirty water and had to run to the bathroom and barf. And I, and this is, this is like 10 days into the, into the decision of the start of the process. And I'm like, are you pregnant? She's like, no, that's ridiculous. Sure enough, many pregnancy tests later, she absolutely is pregnant.

Holy shit. That's crazy. And, um, like there's a lot of parts of this story. I actually wrote down a little list of things that I wanted to talk about. First of all, everything is great. All the scans are perfect. Everything is normal. Paige's health is fantastic.

There is only one detail that came out on the ultrasound of note. And that is, unfortunately, my boy will be inheriting my tiny legs. It's, it's even visible on the ultrasound. Oh, okay. And you have a boy confirmed. Boy confirmed by a blood test and by ultrasound. Um, this, this is back in time to like when me and Paige took our 23 and me tests, right?

Got to make sure there's, there's nothing waiting in the wings on that. Right. And there wasn't, right, right, right. Um, and I went through the, and I was like, you know what, this isn't, you know, all, I want to make sure do this right. And I want to make sure that everything's fine. So we went through the process of getting everything checked out. Uh, a couple of years ago, let me tell you, Willie, getting your boys checked

out at the doctor for this purpose is deeply awkward. Really? It is, it is, it is so, so awkward because it's always a young woman working the desk who hands you the cup and says, well, you can go in that room and, um, do the phone or whatever she got to do. And you, uh, just bring it back and hand it to me. And when you're doled on, you know, and it's just, it's, it's so weird. It's that science.

You do got to do it for science, man. But the only way to know when you get your nice little sheet that says, Hey, yeah, right? Cause I, I'm a little fat, right? I'm like, that can affect it. So I'll, I'll check it out. Like, no, no problem. Turns out Willie, uh, I really am secretly a Frenchman because there's

nothing stopping these swimmers at all. Okay. So good for me. Haha. God damn. Okay. Well, uh, all that's left is the, the mental game. Oh, yeah.

Right. Getting in. Yeah. So getting into that. Inter, intermittent, um, excitement, uh, and like a new kind of excitement. Like a, like a weird pride excitement and terror. You know, I'm just thinking this goes, this, this even goes all the way back to like when we got Zengie, like, why'd you get a bulldog?

Well, we wanted a dog that was excellent with children. Right. A lazy, friendly dog that would be really good around a baby. Um, um, I do have, I do have, uh, I forgot to mention it. So Paige is eating everything and everything makes her throw up. And then she had to go to the dentist. Uh, so I don't know if you know this, but when you are newly pregnant, your gums are a like explosion of blood.

Oh, so she's getting her teeth cleaned and she is like, blood is like shooting out of her mouth. Whoa. Like just like a wash with blood. Well, he goes, haha, that's crazy. You're not pregnant. Are you sure enough? Wow.

Okay. Okay. So there's signs. Yeah. Yeah. I was just actually like, uh, just literally today, um, I find out that like apparently your hair pauses growing. I don't know about that.

There's like a thing where your hair pauses growing as well when that happens. Like there's a couple of things that are just like, like not often mentioned little details that are like, Oh yeah, when you get pregnant, like all kinds of shit starts to change. Huh. Well, I can tell you what, oh, uh, Paige just messaged me that her hair is actually in fact growing like crazy. Oh, wow.

Okay. Um, well, and I can tell you that, um, you get to find out all sorts of things. Got the miracle of pregnancy, including Paige has like three times as much blood per volume as usual. Wow. Just carry lots and lots of blood. Okay. And, um, this is the, like, I guess what timeframe are you looking at here?

Uh, so it will come as a surprise to many, but, uh, Paige is actually five and a half months along. Okay. Um, imminent. Okay. Um, and, uh, baggy clothes are powerful weapons in terms of hiding. Damn, okay. There is a bump.

Okay. Um, and, but we're, we're hitting the, we're hitting the realistic limits of how much a baggy hoodie can do. Yeah. Yeah. That's, that's about as magic as you can fucking get. Uh, wow. So for those of you who follow Paige's streams, uh, Paige has been pregnant

since all the way back in disco, Elysium. That's crazy. Holy shit. Um, camera angles, clothing, like figuring that shit out. That's wild. Okay. Wow. So, um, oh, I'm, it's, so the, the trip to Tefino was not explicitly a honey moon.

It was also a baby moon. Uh, you know, the last, the, you know, one of the last big hurrah on a nice place before we're going to be locked down a little bit more, taking care of our infant child, um, uh, poor page. So, you know, pregnancy symptoms vary wildly. Yeah. This woman had the morning sickness for like four months. Like just cheese.

Hey, did any food that gets you at all? Is it in the house? Uh, like just, just, just, just constant, constant gagging. Um, so Paige has always had a great sense of smell. Um, she can smell food that's not in the house. She can smell things from like 200 feet away. Like it's so powerful. And then it makes her gag.

Well, that, that time has passed. Okay. Thankfully. Jeez. Wow. But again, to reiterate, because I know that people would be worried, Paige is in the peak of health actually never been better. Hmm.

Uh, and we have our doctors monitoring her as they would just absolutely A plus across the board, other than the fact that she's having to deal with the fact that, you know how the Grinch's heart grew three sizes one day? That will happen to your wife's chest. Right. Yes. This is, this is one of the known. It is, I'm looking at my wife and I don't know how she walks around

without tipping over. It is out of control. Yeah. That, that is one of the symptoms that we hear about pretty often. There's, there's a lot you don't. Well, yeah, cause you're like, yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. Okay.

Um, Oh, shit. Yeah. Well, so I mean, that's the thing though, like, like in terms of like timelines and such, like it just, that's, that it makes sense because, um, like, I think, like there's similar ideas in that, like, okay, you have where you were before and then you want to, and they're like, step one is you figure out like a vehicle and step two is you figure out a house and step three is

you figure out the plan, you know, yeah. And, and that's, that's exactly it. And I feel like, um, yeah, like that it just, it lines up one, two, three. So, um, the part of the plan, um, was, you know, we want to move to a bigger space because the space that we were at was great for being single or, you know, young couple. Uh, and we're going through the process. I'm like, and I put my foot down and I'm like, not in Quebec, not doing it.

Not, not just because of, you know, the, the bad experiences that we had where we used to live, uh, Paige was more than willing to find some place like on the West Island or something like that, right? And then like, as we're discussing the plan, I'm like reading the news and like, Oh, cool. More language laws coming down the pipe. More of them, including like, uh, uh, quotas on say ships and where you could go to school and I'm just like, I'm not, I'm not doing this with a kid.

And then I talked to my dad who is obviously very sad to see us go and he's like, if I was your age, then, and I could do, yeah, I would have done it. I'm like, good. Thanks, dad. Appreciate it. That, that meant a lot. Um, as, so got to get somewhere with the, you know, room for the baby, good schools, all that stuff.

So, I mean, that's something that like, uh, I did see, I did see a lot of that stuff and I mean, full disclosure, like, you know, getting a place like, like this is also part of that timeline, right? Yeah, it is. That's, that's exactly what we're lining up and you can't, the last place had no closed doors, so it's insane. You know, you need closed doors to make this work. I'll be blunt.

The conversation did happen where we're sitting around and going, what the fuck is that guy going to do with no closed doors? Yeah, no, the answer is, exactly. So then this is the step to get that. And then now we have the closed doors so we can figure out the rest. The thing with like, um, the Quebec and everything, like I have been talking to, um, some of my family members that have been growing up and the way they've been going to school here and, um, it's, it's pretty interesting because before there

used to be like French immersion, English immersion, and then different levels of like integration, they now have programs that are right down the middle, 50-50 bilingual, um, and, uh, overall, like, I was, I was, I had worries about how that was going to go down for like, you know, kids in the language stuff and I got really encouraging work, news about that from the kids in my family currently. You know, okay. And it was, it was overall pretty like, it wasn't as bad as I thought. And then there was a level of that too, where, um, uh, since, uh, not just here,

but like with, with, uh, um, Punchmoms, Acadian roots, there's a level of French that we do want to exist. You know, of course, um, like I'll be, I'll be very blunt. This kid's going to know a second language. Yeah, it's, it's just useful. It's just, it's just, don't know what that's, that second language is no longer assigned by default. Right.

Right. Okay. Yeah. It's just useful to have that, you know? Um, but again, we've, we've, we've talked about this type of stuff. And to me, I fucking, I just love the city like so much. And I, I don't see myself over you living it, leaving it. Like we've talked about that, um, years ago, too.

I remember a while, a while back, you know, but like, um, yeah, it's just, it's something that I just, the, the, the things that, that matter to me when I, when it comes down to it are, are, uh, things I hold dear about, right. This, you know, the places I love in the, and, and, and, and, I mean, what's going to work differently for anybody is, is, is not my place to judge or even comment on. Right. I think this is going to be the best for, for the baby, uh, in the long term.

And I, you know, I have to be a responsible man. Yeah. I have to, I have, I can't just think about, about me and the wife, I got to, I got to think about, about little, little Pat Jr. and what's best for him. Lamaze classes and whatever the fuck. Yeah. Okay.

Okay. Yeah. So, so a lot of this new found, new era of, uh, plaid wearing and responsibility falls into, into place a little bit. You've been prepping for what's to come. Yeah. And you've been becoming. Well, I gotta get the, I'm in BC.

I got to wear the plaid so that I can, I can hang out with the other dads. Of course. But you've also got to become somebody who's like taking on this responsibility. Well, I have to tell you, there's part of this, there's a part of this that only you will ever understand. You know how you saw your parents say or do stupid shit, but it's like a childhood memory and you're like, ah, that was funny. But you never actually got to see your parent embarrass themselves constantly.

Uh-huh. Well, there's so much footage of me saying the stupidest things in the world and being cringe, a lifetime, committed time of cringe to video and audio to my son to see and, and it will not be left behind in a different era. It's right there and it's going to, it's going to continue to be. Yes. I've had this thought. I've had this thought deeply long and I've really sat and just went, there's

infinite footage of nonsense. Whatever the fuck you think you're going to pretend to be is that, that's like facade will come down the moment they get online. Well, I have been on this show and on my show and on your show for years being like, Hey kids, you know, don't use condoms. Just don't terrible. They feel awful. Just don't use them.

And now when I'm going to be raising a son, I'm going to have to explain to him that was a joke, that jokes, funny jokes. Also don't do crack cocaine. Yeah. Yeah. Don't do it. I mean, like, you don't even have to worry about, like, even if access is, like, even if they don't get to hear or see it, the titles of the content, just

the, this, this podcast has become an albatross. It is, it is a liability of my future reputation. It is, it is, it is, it is absolutely a liability. Yeah. No, I've, I've thought long and deep and hard about exactly this and the day that it would come that it'd be like, okay, well, chicken's coming home to roost. Now what? You know, I feel, I feel, I feel kind of bad because like, you know, we went and

got the ultrasound and we got like a, a private ultrasound that has like a, yeah, has like a better, like 4D views. You can really see. And we're looking at, we're looking at little baby Pat Jr. And we're like, okay, well, there's the short legs. And that just looks like my baby photos. That, that is like, so my wife who is doing all of the hard work is just cloning me and now I'm sitting here going, oh no, there's going to be a clone of me.

You have around, you have, you have, there's two choices you have when it comes to, uh, reconciling all of this, right? And one is the deep, deep warranted shame of what you've, what you've created over these years and have put out there onto the internet archive forever. And the second option is to quadruple down and yell that these, that colostomy bag joke paid for your fucking tuition. Oh yeah.

Yeah. No. Hey, listen, you don't judge how I provide for you. If I'm going to, if I'm going to put on the clown makeup and dance and have the pies thrown at me, then that's, that's what we're going to do. So you can, I could put food on your table, Mr. That fucking, that sore orifice joke paid for dinner and will continue to do so.

So you accept that. Yeah. I'm, I'm, I'm doomed. I was such a smart ass when I was a kid. And you're like, well, okay, maybe the kid won't take after me. Guess who else was a smart ass as a child? My wife. There's no hope, man.

That kid's going to run circles around me. They're going to call me cringe. I'm booming out here, man. Oh God, you'll never be based again. Was I ever based, dude? Like one can have based takes without ever actually being based themselves. I think, I think, I think that's a, that's a required understanding. Um, God damn, God damn, I've been, I've been like, I've been like this whole

stream, I gotta admit, I've been, I've been twitching. This is, this is the biggest thing that will ever happen. Um, and it's so exciting, but it's also very scary because I'm an idiot. I'm a dumb ass. I mean, bigger, dumber people have also had kids. Yeah, like our parents. So, you know, you know what? I'm just thinking, I just told a story today about my dad going, you know, you

don't need to be careful around or electricity and then watching him like electrocute himself nearly to death to fix a VCR. I'm like, you know what? I can just, why don't I just stay away from that? Yeah. I'll just, I'll just not do that. Yep. Yep.

You can start applying extra levels of that's unnecessary. You have no reason for that. Um, I was listening, I was listening to a podcast and they were talking about like, you know, the whole, you know, parenthood and all that thing and the worries and the frets and the thoughts and the stresses and all the things that run through your mind. And, um, it was pretty cool because there was like a takeaway that someone had. Everyone has these little bits.

But a simple one though, it was like, don't worry too much about all that stuff because all they really need is you. Yeah. Right? And I'm cool and likable. That's not what I'm saying. Just be present and, you know, be there. And, and as long as you're there and they're like fully able to get that from you,

it'll, it'll work itself out. It'll be okay. So, so, I mean, obviously eagle-eyed and eagle-eared viewers will have seen little bits and pieces of this, uh, uh, in the past, you know, year or so. Um, but like, I'm starting to change. Like my, my head, my, my, I'm, I am, I am starting to morb. And there's one specific moment that stands out really clearly and like, oh, I'm already like very significantly starting to change.

I was playing RE4 remake on stream and I shot some dude with a shotgun and he flew the fuck apart into a million pieces. And I went, you know, when I was 11, I played the Resident Evil games and those were really violent, but like that's different. This is really crazy violent. I can't believe people would let their 10 year olds play this. Now I'm like, oh my God, it's, it's, it's already starting. It's already starting.

The shift. Oh boy. Oh boy. And people have noticed that my jokes are getting worse. Of course they're getting worse. They're dad jokes now. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Oh boy. Like this, this, this, uh, does Pat Starratt enter the, the PG era? There's no hope.

After the Attitude Era comes the PG. No, there's no hope of that because like I'm sitting there in the, in the, in the, you know, in the, the, the natal appointments, right? And you're like, don't, don't swear at the doctor. Don't, I know you're nervous. So don't, don't, don't call something a motherfucker in the, in the doctor's office when you're looking at the ultrasound. Come on.

Don't be, be cool. Be like a, be like a presentable human adult. Okay. Did it? It's just, there's like, it's always going to fall apart the moment they go, okay. And so what do you do? What's your, what's your, your profession? Like there's just a moment where you're just like, yeah, YouTube.

It's just, you can't, you can't, you can't, you can't hold that, that, that fucking facade up, but oh man, congratulations. That's fucking wild. That's, so we're announcing now at, at, at, at five and a half months, uh, we want, so usually you wait at least a couple of months and then, uh, we wanted to, we wanted to, you know, kind of enjoy this, this, this, it's very special. It's very strange and, you know, in, in our privacy, right? Um, but also I'm also like simultaneously at like bursting at the seams to like tell

everybody, right? Because yeah, yeah, I did it. Right. Um, so you mentioned, nice headshot. You mentioned what's our nice headshot. Oh, that reminds me, I'll send something to you, Wolves. Um, let me go and find it for you. Uh, there it is.

Just take a copy past of this and there you go. That's for you. Um, uh, ultrasounds have come a long way. Uh, I remember, I remember when I was a kid, my dad looking at an ultrasound going, I don't know where his baby's at and it's like, now, no, you can tell. There's the head. Yeah, that's the thing. Yeah.

Yeah. There's little arms getting ready to talk shit. It's going to talk so much shit, so much shit, dude. Me and, me and Paige were, we were like, we were, we were eating lunch, uh, earlier before this and we're talking to like, I don't know what I'm going to do because like, you see kids say outrageous shit to their parents, right? And they'll like, they'll like talk shit. And it's like, here's the problem.

It's hilarious. It's hilarious. But don't, don't laugh. Don't, don't laugh. You're going to, you're going to encourage it. So like, I'm going to be dealing with like a three year old says he doesn't have to listen to me because I'm fat and I'm going to have to sit and stand there and just go, like, no.

That's not nice to say. No, you, you will get roasted and the dynamic where, uh, mom and kid double down on you as, as the target point is just another, it's just another flex. It's just another new angle to it, right? What's better than dunking on you and assist into the double fucking hang time. Air, you know, slam, windmill from the kid. Um, now you can't, you can't abuse the superpower that comes with like whispering sick burns to the kid to go relay to dunk.

I'm not going to, I'm not going to do that. I'm, I'm, I'm afraid of my wife. I won't do that. She'll get me. That's, that's dangerous. But, oh man. So, oh, and the little, and the little legs right, right? Down there and everything that the tiny little legs that have followed my

family for their entire existence, hopefully he'll have a long torso like his mama and be like a normal height, but who, I'm not, I'm not holding my breath. Not going to hold my breath on that one. Uh, that is, you know, no, the, the, the health news as well is super awesome. Like that's the type of thing that like, you know, all kidding aside, like, yeah, like with page health is a concern, you know, and, but it is, had it's not been a concern at all. Fuck yeah.

Okay. Eating well, uh, cutting out caffeine, uh, uh, uh, you know, uh, you know, moving out to this fresh air, exercising more, taking all the, taking all the XP boosters and yeah, uh, dude, we, we have been taking and we super fucking rare candies prenatal vitamins for like 18 months. Okay. Okay. Yeah.

Right. Not, I'm not taking prenatals. I've been taking like, you know, men's health vitamins, right? Uh, because like, I'm probably missing something, right? So let's just make sure that everything is in perfect working order. And like, sure enough, perfect working order. Like it has this moment of like, you're planning the process and you're like, okay, well, we'll see.

It'll be a couple of months, maybe. And like, no, okay. Now, okay. Now, okay. It's starting now. You think you have a lead up? No, it's now. Because sometimes right after you, again, after all the XP boosters, then you go down

to like, you have to, you take a step over and eventually you're like, I'm using the Guatemalan pepper spice that only grows here at this time of year. And they say that if you do this on a full moon, then this is going to, you know, and it starts getting a little bit more dicey. Apparently I just need to be somewhere in the vicinity of my wife. Like family matters. Like you, Erkel just kisses Lara and then it's like, yeah, it's magic. There you go.

Um, damn six or approaching six. Yeah. So you want to hear the, the, the, the day to day funniest thing. I lost a lot of weight, but I still got a nice healthy, uh, dad pouch. I'm going to call it orb. Um, affection, much affection in the home has moved to Christian side hugs. Yeah. Because it, I can't, I can't.

If I'm looking right at my wife and I go to, it's nothing's happening. We can't, I can't reach her. There's, there's too much orb mine for show hers for purpose. You're already getting blocked. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Like this, this has been my sympathy pregnancy orb that I've been working on for 10 years.

Um, I, I think, I think it works. So there's all kinds of cool tricks you hear about. One of the ones I heard about was like when the, when the stress in the back pain gets real heavy because it's like about to pop. If you just kind of go and from behind, just kind of lift up the weight. That is like a ridiculous release of stress off the board, off the back. It's funny cause like, you know, there's your physical symptoms and then there's your mental symptoms of pregnancy, right?

So, uh, some, some women, uh, get, uh, emotional or ornery. Or whatever, not page exactly the same, exactly the same. In fact, she's a little more chill. Okay. The only thing is that, um, every now and then we'll be sitting somewhere and she'll look at her phone and then she will just burst right into tears. Okay. And, and I'll be like, what's wrong?

And then she's like, the old people, there's a story on Reddit about an old couple and they died and it's just like, they're wool. There, there it goes. Yeah, yeah. Just out, just out of nowhere, just out of nowhere. I mean, that's, there's, yeah, at what we, last of us, episode three is a fucking like that's a, that's a real test of, of whether you, anyone could hold it together. So, so we watched that episode when she, when she was a couple months along and we had,

it took like two and a half hours to watch that episode because my wife was a beloved man. Absolutely. Could like just, oh my goodness. Absolutely. Damn, pregnant. How I'm not doing that. Absolutely.

Massively pregnant, pregnant. My wife is in the family way. She is with child. How, how is baby formed? That's, you know, Wally, I, I, I was firm like months now, I have been like imagining your reaction and I'm like, I was like, I had like a coin flipping in the back of my mind going like, please be so shocked that you go, how did that happen? So I can like look at you like you're a dumb ass because I have seen people do that.

I have seen that reaction. Yeah, who answers out loud in real life. Yeah. But. But unfortunately you're a mature adult now. Damn, damn. Well, like I said, you know, like I think last week and before it's like never made it this far into the game before, right?

Never made it this far. This is a whole new level of it. It's very new. And it's very new. Oh, yeah. And, and, and at some point two people leave the house and then three people come home and that's it. Yeah.

That's it. And that's it. Well, yeah, fucking another holy shit. Congrats again to everybody. That is. Thank you. Yeah, I appreciate it. Yeah.

Oh, well, there you go. Bombshells off my chest. Off the chest. Oh man. That is so like we like we didn't even like when we kept it private like my mom and dad did not find out until relatively recently. Like just just really wanted. Yeah.

And like, and like for my mom, there's always the worry like, you know, it's her, it's her grandbaby, which was, which I always said our babies are stupid. So she like kind of like gave up and then I'm like, Hey, mom, guess what? Yo, that's a great feeling. Getting to tell your mom that she's going to be a grandma. Oh man. Especially if there's that little like little background pressure like, Oh, you know, whenever you can, whenever you get out to it.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And that is the right move too. Because well, you know, I mean, I like, I know a couple that had to try many times, you know, yeah, and it took a while. And so it's best off to like give it a shot to be like, how's it going? The norm to, to wait a little bit. Yeah. Yeah.

You want to make sure everything's okay. And then once you do, you're like, all right, looks like we're, we're all systems go. And again, can't stress this enough. Not only is everything okay, everything is perfect. Perfect. Okay. Like within a baby is right now on size at 50th percentile, 50th percentile. That was the number I wanted to hear.

And then they're like, except for his legs, they're 20th percentile for legs. And I'm like, Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, God. Oh, no, the saga continues. All right. Oh, pay. I had forgotten page pages.

Pages is letting me know. And also his belly right now is at 90th percentile. Okay. So he looks like me even now. Okay. Did you, did you have any thoughts on the like, boy, girl reveal? Like, I don't care. No, but like, no, not that part of it.

I mean, more so like waiting versus not waiting versus finding out right away. Oh, no way. No way. Like they're like, do you want it to be sealed in an envelope? Some people are like, no. Yeah. Now. Okay.

Info. Gimme. Data. All right. Yeah. There was, there was frame data, frame data that baby right now. There was, there was the idea that was floated by me for a few minutes about getting it sealed and then mailing it to you, obfuscated as to what it was.

That's wild. And then, and then telling you to open it live and then having you have a meltdown. But I was like, that's too much. That's crazy. That's, that's a lot. I would have. Can't do that. That's way too much.

I would have, I would have said to you, that's too much. I would have. Absolutely. You would have been told that is, that is way too much. But yeah, no, get all the data immediately. Data mind the baby fucking stats, line it up. I want to know everything. I don't believe in surprises.

Okay. Okay. All right. All right. I would like to take the bathroom break if that's cool with you and go calm my nerves. That's about. I'm, I'm twitching here. That's right on point.

Let's do that. Bathroom break, BRB. Okay. I'm now being attacked by the sudden. Oh, that's a lot. You don't have curtains up to you. I have their, so they're, they're, they're missing where the sun is. The curtains are up here and then they stop right there.

And God, yeah. Yeah. That is so silly. I didn't, this placement was not foreseen. This is, I'm blind. If you're listening to the audio version of this podcast, you gotta get a screenshot of what this looks like. Holy hell.

I can't, it's too much. You are bleached. I can't like blowing out your camera. It's insane. It's completely insane. Like I don't know what, like, oh my God. Put some sunglasses on and roll with it. Yeah.

They're packed somewhere. I don't have any around. Oh my sunglasses. Fuck. What do I got? Uh. Uh. This will hide me from the sun.

But I, I'm not the, it's, it's the doka gay hat, but I'm not the doka gay. So I feel like a fraud. This is fine, dude. Feel like fraud. It's, it's all good. Okay. Um, yeah.

No, this is wild. It is right in my eyeballs. Like actually, um, okay. This is legitimately saving me. Uh, fuck. Well, anyway. Um, uh, uh, uh, what are we doing? Jesus.

I don't know. I thought we were going to do ads. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. There we go. Money. Here. Money for baby. Hey, yeah.

I don't just have a mortgage. I got a kid on the way. So these ads are important money for baby. All right. Listen up this week. The podcast is sponsored by bombis and just shut the fuck up. And you get spend the money on bombis because there's babies now. There's babies now.

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Thanks, Raycon. Food to baby. Not the headphones. No, not the, no, though they, they're small, that is not. I'm an idiot, but even I know that. No, don't do it. Okay. Hey, before we continue.

So you mentioned, you mentioned like feeding your pregnant wife during the green chef. So man, you, there's all sorts of shit I didn't know. So you know, you take your prenatal vitamins, it's good for you, good for baby, right? Right? Do you know what prenatal vitamins are actually for? What they're really for? Is there another purpose? No, but like specifically.

So, you know, you're talking to the doctor and you're like, what kind of foods should we eat? And you know, you want to have the perfect nutrients, you know, yada, yada. And like, oh, they say, oh, make sure to get this vitamin or that vitamin. But all in all, it'll be fine. Why? Because prenatals are not for baby because baby is going to take what it needs. Baby steal minerals off of mom's bones.

Okay. To get what it needs. It will take whatever it wants. It's to replenish or for mom. It's to replenish mom. Okay. Damn. It's because otherwise baby will take your teeth.

Symbiote. Okay. That makes sense. Oh, yeah. Okay. So, um, video games, I guess. Yeah. Video games.

That's important. Um, you know, who loves video games? Babies, that's right. They sure do. They sure do. Uh, I mean, fighting games even. Wow. Tech and eight cross play.

Well, how about this? How about this? Somebody leaked some footage they weren't supposed to leak. And we saw a clip of what looks like a persona three remake and jet set radio. Yeah. That's pretty fucking sick. P three had been rumored for a long time with no evidence of it. And this seemed to be like a really highly detailed shot of yukari doing a big old bow

and arrow shot. And, uh, then there was a little jet set radio clip at the end with like a new version of beat kind of dancing and it would set for internal use only. So it seems like it was an investor's meeting for Sega. So that specific clip may not be real or final, but it's supposed to show off to businessman. Hey, look, this would be a cool thing that we're doing. I kind of wonder, that's the thing is like, is it, is it like, yes, this is a real internal

thing, but no, this does not represent actual projects that are happening. You know, it's just kind of like a idea of what we want, a green light or, you know, stuff in the pipeline, but it's not really reflective of what they've made. I don't know. But the, the details on the P three stuff look really high quality. Like that looks like it absolutely could be real assets. And the gamatsu came out and said, well, we can't vouch for the footage. We have heard from many people that they are in fact working on a P three game.

There's also, it's also couched in between some sonic frontiers footage of, you know, sonic popping and super Saiyan. So, um, yeah, I don't know. I like the, the, the, the jet set radius stuff is interesting because like we've been in the state of like, what's going on with it? Why no port of future to PC? Why no love for anything related to this? And then eventually, well, fuck it, bomb rush cyber funk, you know,

team reptiles is going to do it. A lot of fan made jet set radios, spiritual successors over the years. The idea that they're going to eventually actually do something is like, man, I'll still have to wait to believe it when I see it. But, um, they rendered something, you know, there, there was something that we looked at there. At the very least, somebody somewhere said, this would be cool. It makes me though, like, like the part where if this was in the works for any amount of time, um, that was not that long ago.

Hideki Naginuma would have been on Twitter, probably not saying where the fuck is jet set radio, bring it back. Sega, you cowards, right? The fact that the guy behind the music is, is going, bring it back. Sega, what the fuck, along with everybody else kind of makes you think, oh, maybe he's not secretly working on something or, I mean, it's possible that that game didn't make it. Right. The persona and, uh, son of frontiers were like, yeah, but then the jet set was like,

yeah, they're also saying the footage is not that recent either. That's true too. Yeah. Anyway, 2021. Yeah. So a little, little weird, weird clip. But P3 remake is, it makes a lot of sense. I mean, that's obviously, um, one of the best ones that's like locked

and, and, and P3P being an update to that, that like has like femC and stuff that we never really got in any other format. Uh, that deserves it. I mean, they recently, um, they recently put out, uh, the re-release of P3P, uh, a game that I was sponsored to play and that means it's great. But there were a few, uh, uh, lasting issues with the port, in particular, the AI upscaling they used for a lot of the backgrounds could have used another pass. Oh yeah.

No mode remod. Okay. Um, so yeah, that was, that was a little interesting thing. Um, and then also P1 and P2 fucking thrown deeper into their dirt grave. I mean, like honestly, like those games have to just be like complete reconstructions from scratch if they ever wanted to, right? Yeah. Like they could skip like a P6 for a while and just go full on.

Like we're doing one and two, uh, for reels this time and, and, and give it the full royal treatment if they wanted to. And it would, it would be a pretty new experience for most people. Seeing as persona starts at three. I, listen, you've, you've said, you've said some shit like that. And I, there's, there's a couple that have been like violently outrageous. Persona starting at three is actually fairly weak. Uh, I still think the most insane version of that you've ever said was like Castlevania

starts at Symphony of the Night, like I spat blood onto the ground. I was so outraged. Resident Evil starts at four. That, like now, like when you said that, that was insane. It's actually less crazy now, right? Cause it's been so long since then. Uh, for anyone new to the bit, it is a bit. Relax, put your pitchforks down.

Um, but that photo shop that someone excellently made of like three P three, P four and P five, just edited with the numbers to be one, two and three remains the greatest troll I've ever seen. Like that is the best troll I've ever seen. Oh, it's good. Unbelievable. Um, anyways, uh, but, uh, uh, uh, speaking of Resident Evil, that aside, what the fuck is Death Island?

I don't, oh, you know, hold on, let me put my phone on silent. I had it on, I had it on not silent for a reason because there's a poster for Resident Evil, Death Island and everybody appears to be here. All the warriors, everyone is there, including, uh, it's a, it's a shitty CG movie, much like damnation or the other crappy fuck ones. Um, and, uh, Jill is there and Jill is not aging because, uh, because viruses and what a nuptial will just never age. Um, she won't.

So do these movies take place canonically, like, after all the games? Yeah. No, in between certain ones. Okay. Pre-seventh. They are canon and their canonicity is nonsensical because characters don't act like themselves, uh, and, uh, many of them don't make any sense, but yeah, no, they do. When did Jill unblonde is all I want to know?

Uh, this is before she blonde it. Oh, okay. So, um, yeah. Yes. So July 7th in Japan comes, uh, R.E. Dead Island. And yeah, it, there's another pro. It's after, that's even before.

There's another promo shot of as well, and it seems to just be like, besides the main poster, like the, the one screenshot as well is also just like, here is everyone with their guns. Look at all the warriors though. We're gonna shoot them like a Power Ranger team. Yeah. It is, it is like violently strange that Jill looks as she does an R.E. 3 remake despite it taking place like 10 and a half, like 10 years later. She's wearing the same outfit, dude.

Well, Chris looks like his older version, but yeah, Leon looks pretty young too. Like he's actually like 45. Yeah. They're honestly like, I feel like he's the only one that's aged up and everyone else is kind of like stuck in time. Yeah. Yeah. Well, anyway.

We got that. And then yeah, there's a couple of things going on in fighting games. Sure. For starters. Harada is done with your shit. You know, like, yeah, let anyone who repeats these questions that I've answered, may their name be written in the death note. Um, Harada very saltily confirmed that cross play is confirmed for Tekken 8 and that the launch

roster will also include more characters than Street Fighter 6. And they'll be rolled back. And there will be rollback. And he kind of basically was saying like there's no point in announcing this stuff as like actual features because it's just going to lead to like salty online discourse or whatever. So all of you just shut up. But yes, they're they're they're doing it. And I mean, I think that was kind of implied with Areka taking up the mantle for them as well.

It's really funny that like Harada is like announcing all these things that people like, but he's like so mad about it. Like it feels like he's just like super pissed. He's because he's lost the rollback conversation. Because I'm sure he's sick of hearing about it, but also doesn't necessarily quite understand why everyone was so like upset to begin with. Like there's a part of it that sounds like he's like, I don't get it, but fine. Here it is.

It's the same thing that's always been there. You know, are you happy? Like Tekken 8 is going to come out and there's going to be reviews going, wow, the rollback is incredible. And he's like, shut up. It was always no. Yeah. Yeah, exactly.

But anyways, three anyways, that's all good news. Of course, the only thing with the whole roster size bit, which is like it being a bigger launch than launch cast in six. I don't care as much about the numbers. I want to know who's there and how interesting those choices are. Of course, the roster is going to be bigger than Street Fighter 6. That's how that works. Yeah, I like looking at six, there's a lot of exciting choices beyond the world warriors that

all return that I'm like, yo, look at all these new awesome characters coming back and rather all these new awesome characters being dropped and stuff. And I want to finish seeing this roster and seeing like, is T6, T8 going to have like more characters, but they're all returning, you know, with like one or two new because yeah, it's always more exciting to see like more new stuff. Tekken has always been like willing to just like bring as much forward as possible, though. It's going to be like five seasons of like getting the full roster in there in some way, Tekken suffers in a way that Street Fighter kind of doesn't.

Street Fighter has like, you know, you get to four and five and you're like, when so and so going to come in because there's a million Street Fighter characters, right? But Tekken has that problem worse because there's also a million Tekken characters, but like most of them always get in. So like, like Street Fighter has a history of like, do I expect Hakon or 12 or G to show up? No, no, I don't. Do I expect some weirdo idiot like Geiges to show up? Yeah, where is he?

Yeah. Where is he? I'm never like, I know also to not expect ancient ogre, but like if they do come back around maybe tag three, right? Whenever they do a tag dream match, then everything's on the table. Yeah, so good stuff for them. I'm very, I'm very excited to see the first of the original characters, so like I want to know what what what you're doing with that.

What else is going on in terms of fighting games? Okay, so there's a Kickstarter and they actually reached out to me. There is a documentary being made called Ghost Lord and the Quest for Dark Presence. And that's a hell of a name. And the reason why this is interesting is because it's following the story of, are you familiar with Galloping Ghost, the giant legendary arcade? Yeah, I'm somewhat familiar. So basically it's like one of the best remaining,

it's the best arcade like remaining on like on the planet type of thing. Run by Doc Mac and it's a giant warehouse that took over a block as they just added another warehouse to the other side. And they just have every arcade machine I've ever like I've ever heard of, everything I've ever seen listed, that entire main list you scroll down, they've got it physically set up and running for reels. And you kind of just you walk in and you pay to enter and then all games are on free play, right? The perfect setup, perfect way to kill time.

It's beyond legit. It's insane. It's awesome. And before the creation of Galloping Ghost, apparently, Doc Mac was working on a fighting game that involved like taking pictures of actors and live action outfits full on combat style, tattoo assassin style, right? The Dong Dong Never Die style and those sprites so trashy. And those exists and they have for like 20 plus years now, but the project never got off the ground. But 28 years later, it's still being worked on and he's still trying to put this out.

And everyone is wearing the most cosplay ass fucking outfits, but the weapons are real. And shit is just people on chairs doing flying. It's all of it. All of it is there. And essentially they're just chronicling the story of this 28 year project. That is being worked on right now. And yeah, it seems like we might get ourselves some proper 2023 poverty, right? I'm like this is exciting because like assets that were like shot and made like 15 years ago look weird. And I want to see it 28 years ago. So like I want to see I want to see the 28 year old assets right next to the assets from six months ago. I mean, there's the trailer for the documentary is basically like

they talk about like going over into like gyms and just seeing like fit people and being like, hey, do you want to be in a video game and then them showing up at a warehouse and just picking up weapons and putting on random shit and just becoming a fighting game character video game character now. Yeah, just put on some shit. You're in it. You're ready to go, you know. And yeah, they're still trying to do it. This footage just looks like trash. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So the good kind of Kusouge hopefully coming soon. And this is going to be talking about the story of this project and how it's how it's coming along. What is it? There's yeah, there's dark presence and then and then the sequel to that will be

conquering light. It's awesome. There's a whole plan. There's a whole plan and they're working on it. And look, man, you know, in a world where Jackie Chan fists the fire can fucking thrive as a Jackie Chan in it, man. And like five other people who nobody knows. Well, it has Jackie Chan and then has Jackie Chan has Jackie Chan and a couple more other characters. Yeah. Yeah. So no, I'm looking forward to seeing this poverty get created. And this is this is a documentary talking about it at the very least. And it's about halfway to its goal. So just putting that out there, Ghost Lord and the Quest for Dark Presence. What a ridiculous name. Yeah, for a ridiculous concept. And I'm down for the walk into that closet, pick up some shit and walk back out here. You're a

character now. Like, I'm down for this this this school of design. Just thinking of like, what moves do I do? Whatever. Just swing it. Do just do a pun. I don't care. But not too hard because these are real weapons, though. Yeah. So there's that. Another fighting game that was just dropped was or in teaser, a teaser for it was dropped. Checkmate showdown. So this is fucking interesting because a TikTok popped up and then they just then they ended up on on Twitter a couple days ago being made in Montreal. I was about to look it up and you sent it to me. Thank you. Chess. But when the character when you attack another the opponent, a fight, a fighting game round starts. I hope those rounds are as fast as

fuck. Yeah. And pawns are a little weak, you know, characters. The rook is a grappler grappler. Of course it is. There's a bishop that's probably a zoner. There's a knight that's like a speed character of it, you know, and a queen who's probably super OP. Yeah, it's it's called those characters can't be fair. They have to be wildly unfair. Absolutely. Because the idea of like, OK, my knight takes your your pawn, but your pawn fought back and won the fight. That's crazy. Like that adds a level of like, wait, but I'm supposed to win so I can set up this position, though. Yeah, just because you're gonna this isn't your dad's chess. Conceptually sounds pretty interesting. Because yeah, I like I like me some chess. I haven't

played in a while, but it's fun. And then you just throw this on it. And I hope yeah, hopefully, again, the like the queen should absolutely annihilate anyone who's playing as a pawn and so on. The description is for chess players that want to outsmart precision through patience and fighting game players that want to outclass intelligence through execution. Interesting. It seems like I'm really interested to see more than anything how it would what advantages and disadvantages every piece gets at what point in the game. Yeah, or is it just your life bar? What's the deal? Yeah. And if a pawn makes it to the end, do you get to level up and switch your class and whatever? It would be cool to see how they balance it.

But yeah, there's obviously there's been chess combat and chess to and cyber chess and all that. This is a cool idea. It seems like it was born from a game jam or something to that effect, but it's turning into a real thing. Give it a peep. There is also. And while we're talking about these kick starters and things like that, another one of this popped up some time ago, Gino kids. So I saw this not too long ago, but it is a colorful thank you character action style hack and slash as the description, but it's a character action game. Quick tag. Tons of just colorful, stylish things going on. It's high fire rush is going on aesthetically.

Like you're getting a lot of high fire rush energy from this, which we can aptly say now. And cel shaded, just cool looking, fun flow, air combos, Marvel style tagging into the next character. Yeah, it just looks like a really cool action game. So this thing's up on Kickstarter as well. And again, you know, look into it if it seems up your alley and by all means, but it's currently two thirds of its way to its goal, I'd say. So take a look. Oh, Kira Buckland is the VA. Kira Buckland is VA for the blue girl. That's cool. Interesting. Nice. Good job. And also for some reason, the trailer ends with a giant Emile head in the, in the background. Oh boy. Okay. Yeah. And then there's a style meter during

the combo. So like, you know, we can see their fans of the stuff. I also see a, uh, what does it say? Okay. Quadruple S is a ranking. Come on. Yeah. Yeah. Can't do that. Six skills. It's too many. Four S's. Three is two months already. Come on. Uh, so yeah, Gino kids, uh, looks, looks cool. Yeah. Um, so I saw that they updated, uh, God of War Ragnarok with a new game plus mode and that makes me go, there was not already a new game plus in that game. Yeah. Same thing with the first one where the new game plus got added later. Um, yeah. No, it, it now has a new game plus mode. And this, this was like, this was, um, needed way more than the first game. Okay. So, um,

because you get to the end of God of War Ragnarok and, uh, I, I talked about it at length, uh, about the, I think it was when Susie was here first, about the third weapon that you get. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Um, and, um, I was like, I will never play this game again unless I can start with that weapon. Right. Um, and they put out in the, the thing like, okay, step one, the cool cloak that Kratos has in the intro to the game that is now armor you can wear in new game plus. Cool. Uh, and you will be starting the game with that weapon in new game plus. It just can't unlock any of the puzzle solutions until you get to that point in the game, but you can totally fight your shit off with it. I'm like, Oh, thank God. Cause holy hell, I didn't want to ever even

look at that game ever again without that weapon. It's so much more fun than the other two. I guess the, they just kind of put it out as soon as they hit that finishing line and then they kind of go, all right, for a new game plus, how do we balance this? Let's figure it out post launch. Yeah. And the answer is take away because the, because the weapon also lets you solve puzzles and it also has like Metroidvania style applications. And the solution is like, just, just don't let it do any of that shit. Just, just have it not work until you actually unlock the weapon as part of the story. Okay. All right. That makes sense. Um, yeah. So that, that just dropped as well. Um,

the Mario Brothers movie is getting a real interesting reception because critics only, it hit 55% on Rotten Tomatoes and then it's breaking records and smashing, you know, numbers and then audience rating is like 95%. So this is one of the most divisive things recently where it's not critically acclaimed, but fans seem to love it. And everyone seems to be saying, like, it's pretty good. It's not as good as Sonic, but it's still a whole lot of fun is the impression I'm getting. You know what, you know what, you know, it isn't. You know what needs no qualification for everybody loving that goddamn peaches song. Oh, have you not heard it? No, I haven't. Okay. So it's part of the, it's part of the movie. Okay. Then Jack Black did a live

video of him singing the song peaches from the Super Mario Bros movie. Oh, and it is incredible. And it's, it's a, it's a tenacious D song. Okay. Awesome. Awesome. Awesome. Very cool. Yeah, it is fucking awesome. Um, yeah, no, uh, that is, that is a, a, if you're going to get Jack, Jack Black on your thing, on your movie or whatever, you should take advantage of, of the, the him going into D mode, you know, yeah, um, uh, fucking, what was it? Oh yeah. So there was a, a, a, a, a couple months ago, they did a cover of Wicked Game. And if you want to hear like tenacious D doing like a serious song for some reason and like annihilating it, doing it super duper good. Go check that out.

Like that's, that's exciting. Um, yeah, no, but, but, uh, I, I, it's interesting because like, it's Sonic is the direct comparison point. Um, and it seems like it's like, okay, this is not necessarily going to be that, but it still is like quite fine, which I think I was pretty much saying, I think we're like, we're at a point where they're like, yeah, I don't know if we're ever going to get, not we're not, not never. When, when the IP is so big, it, it won't ever be a colossal failure like that. Like it used to be ever again, like not ever again. Like it feels ugly. Sonic was, was the end of that. I, the, the level of money in place now is going to catch it from disaster. You know, it'll come out being mid at worst when certain levels of IP are, are involved.

I think this is kind of where we're at right now. Um, yeah. Yeah. Some people are here saying, oh, you liked it more than Sonic. Interesting. Okay. Um, that means you just didn't have enough Sonic in your heart, brother. I mean, there's something to it though with like, it's not Mario running around hanging out with a real human, right? Well, Mario is ostensibly a real human. Yes, exactly. Um, like, but when I think of, ostensibly a person and like Sonic stories sometimes involve Sonic hanging out with humans and sometimes they're like up to their own. Sometimes they involve him getting it with a human. Exactly. So, you know, that's a little more, um, uh, to be expected, but, uh, yeah, okay.

I'm just, I'm just, I'm curious as to whenever there's something like this and it's like, oh, critically panned, but, but, uh, fan beloved. I'm like, why? Well, we'll have to see it and, and then say, huh, I liked the thing. Like there was a, I read some old man's review and he was saying, he was explaining who Bowser was. It's like, Bowser is a giant evil turtle. Like, and then mentioned like two puppets from the seventies. Okay. I don't, like Jesus Christ, old man. Get, get back in your fucking, in your, in your, in your old pod. I mean, on the one hand, they could see, I could see it being like, Oh, this is fan service. So if you're a Mario fan or video game fan, you're going to be into it. But if you're an old critic, then you're not going to be.

But I also, I'm like, but everyone knows Mario like no, wooly. It's there. I mean, the olds are starting to melt away, but there are many olds who do not know about Mario. Okay. The sun is moving. Fuck you. Well, I just want to take a second as you readjust your Dokoge hat as the sun attacks you. You look like a massive asshole. Like, like real, like real bad. I mean, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's rough. I don't know. Again, most things are in boxes. I don't have a lot of choices out here. Like that'll do it. That'll do it. Well, he totally don't look like an asshole anymore. You did it.

He doesn't even work. It does not fit. Dreads plus headphones do not work. You should, you should turn this into a new look. I can't possibly, it's just now cowboy hat woolly. It doesn't like I have to hit my head up with the sun. Actually, it's not helping at all. All right. I'm going to need to figure out this fucking curtain situation. Like, is this the first time you sat in that spot during this time of day at this time of day? Yes. That's dude. That's always the most fun. That's the most fun. You're organizing your house and you're like, yeah, this is where it should go. And then the, that time of day rolls around and you're like, wow, it's the sun is beaming directly into my fucking eyes. If I sit here,

ow, ow. I was, I was not here during the golden hour. I didn't realize. Okay. Um, well, anyway, one other thing, apropos of nothing. Do you remember slash have you ever heard of slam ball? I have actually, this seems like some UPN trash, fake ass sports shit. Well, yes, but also hype as fuck basketball with trampolines where you're allowed to super jump and do all the shit that you could in NBA hang time. Yeah, that's right. Well, uh, someone with money said, fuck it, bring it back after more than 20 years, slam ball. But woolly, that's stupid is officially returning this summer with a six week regular season and then a one week playoff six week season. It's happening. Uh, yeah. So slam ball is basically like what if

basketball, but trampolines and contact and crazy ass like XFL style, um, uh, uh, uh, condi hits allowed. And also, but here's the thing though, right? I know you, but you always what if blood sport, right? What if, what if? Okay. So not only is like their crazy contact and hits and shit like that. Um, there's the whole game is take takes place in a half hour so that you can air one entire match in a block of TV. You know, if you just forced all the players to take drugs, okay, it wouldn't need the trampolines. They could just, they could just, they could just jump that high normal like anyway, you know what, you know what, you know what the worst thing is about my blood sport

thing is, is that like I blame space jam because I saw a space jam and I'm like, basketball should be like this. I mean, yes, but we also, again, we've gotten hype ass. We got an NBA jam for years. We've gotten arch rivals. We've gotten mutant league and blood bowl and shit like that. Um, you know, it ain't the first time, but, um, regardless, uh, uh, uh, slam ball, I just want the idea of, of ridiculous midair stepping off of somebody to do a, like a dunk that looks like a Titanfall replay. You know what I mean? Like that's kind of what we're hoping for. And there's a lot of that where the defender will jump at the same time as like the, the, the, the scorer. There's positions here. Um, yeah. So what were these words? Okay. So, uh, well, I think it's like

a three point shot and a dunk are also three or three points. I think it's like, it's something like that where it's like, there's a regular shot, but then like dunking is the same as a three point. So you want, you got to go for it. They encourage you to go for it. Pick up one of the other players and put them through the whole basket. Is that worth more points? I don't think that's more worth more points. Uh, however, that is a higher potential decapitation score, uh, seeing as if you hit the bottom of that rim. Actually, they probably have to have a rim that breaks away really easily because if you hit the

bottom of your chin on that, it's over. Like put your leg through there. Think about how like falling and just getting one leg caught in there, you snap like a twig. Yeah. Um, so there's a whole, there's a whole rule set and you can go read about it or whatever. But the point is, is fucking trampoline basketball with contact, contact trampoline basketball is, is, is coming back. And, uh, quite frankly, I think it's, it's, it's time for we, for this and, and indoor soccer and, and all that shit to just like, we need to start pushing sports to the next phase. You know, we need to get Shaolin soccer going somehow and we're not going to get there if we stick to the same old FIFA bullshit. We need to get our XFLs going. We need our

alt leagues happening. I don't think we need to get the XFL going, but he hate me. He hate me everyone. Nobody ever forgot about, he hate me in one second. Everyone was like, God damn, that's the best thing ever. You could have your, your Jersey say whatever you want. And of course he hate you. They all hate you. They hate you forever. They hate you because you win. He hate me, baby. Like, come on. Yeah, you're right. You're right. Yeah. No, they, they, we need that. Um, all right. Well, anyways, let's just take some letters and Hey, if you send in a letter to this podcast, you can send it to castle super pieced mail at gmail.com. That's castle super pieced mail at

gmail.com. Emails next week are going to be wild. Yeah. Okay. Uh, here we go. We got one coming in from Sebastian who says, Hello, Tyrant, Willie and Mr. Pat. A while ago, uh, Willie made a joke about plugging in a Wiimote to play RE4. We make like we addition gave me the idea to use the steam input to set up a pair of joy cons to play the remake with motion controls. What started as a bit to see how bad it would be ended up being something that I loved. I drank the Kool-Aid and I don't want to play games without it anymore. Joy cons mostly for the dual, the dual sense.

Which sucks because very few games support it natively and it's kind of a pain to set it up manually by via steam. That's crazy. Yeah, you can do all sorts of stupid shit with steam input, man. You can do all sorts of stupid shit. Have unofficial controllers, mods or other unsupported features ruins your ability to enjoy certain games without it. Um, I don't think I've ever switched over to a way where like, I mean, like my, like my whole hybrid controller setup thing was like a preference for a while, um, bit aside. I don't know that I've had something where I'm like, I could never go back to the default, but I have never played with weird controls. I do think, um, no, fight sticks is not, is not a real answer because I

switch over to controllers for certain fighting games all the time. Fight sticks are not a, once you've played with them, you can never go back. You can absolutely go back to controller, no problem. Um, what I want to exist, and this has never been a thing is I want there to be, it sucks that there's no fan games that use the steel battalion controller setup. I feel like that, I feel like that should have been a community of crazy people that developed other uses for that plastic so that you can play insane simulators and shit and find a way to plug them into a PC. That's, that's my, my biggest controller tragedy. Like there's no, like we need to find a way to convert lost your fucking mind. Xbox to USB and then have all those switches and just make a nice

fan button, fan game, mecha game that uses 44 switches to fucking do other things besides steel battalion. That's the real tragedy of controls. All right. Well, anyway, I don't, I play with regular controls. I think the most adventurous thing that I've ever done is like reman is the stuff I did with Delveme Cry, uh, five. And that's just like teach steam input to hold a button for me. Right. Let's take one over here from Azure says, uh, dare will dine Zidane and Pat Bert Steiner.

Now that you're going through f of nine, I wanted to let you know about this, hidden quest. That's not a spoiler. It's just showing that the very nature of the LP, you're not going to get this. Um, I'm sure Pat knows Excalibur two is something that I can confirm. It's, it's, it's not accessible content. The strongest weapon you can get for Steiner is Excalibur two strongest weapon period. But to get it, you have to reach, you have to reach one of the last rooms in the game within 12 hours of starting. Once that amount of time has passed, the item is gone, not technically gone for good because you can actually reset the internal game clock by letting the game stay on for two years. So it's not practical, but anyways, um,

uh, yeah, you can, there are some quirky details like the fact that since different versions of the game have different frame rates, the actual time difference changes depending on the version can be as short as 10 hours, but I'll spare you the ins and outs. It's an interesting hidden reward for speedrunning, but it forces you to skip a ton of content, especially considering the timer never really stops even in cutscenes. Um, yeah, are there any weird hidden pot and impractical rewards like this in games that you can remember? Uh, yeah, I can think of one. I brought up the Dark Souls fucking, uh, two stupid truffle pig, uh, uh, whatever, um, pickaxe. Yeah. The pickaxe completely insane. No, that. Hey, you want the fucking slam dunk ultimate

shittiest version of this ever? All you have to do is go three games into the future with Final Fantasy 12 and let's talk about the motherfucking Zodiac spear. This fucking piece of shit is the best weapon in the game. This original FF 12, not international version. Hey, guess what? How do you get the fucking Zodiac spear? Oh, I don't know. Don't open four random chests throughout the game. Oh, like FF six has that. Yeah. Wait till later and it cooks over time. And when you open it at the end, it gets good. And at the end, the chest will show up and then it will be fucking, it'll open and it'll be a goddamn Zodiac spear. Which chests? Oh, I don't know. Completely fuck random chests in the early game. Why would it? Why? Why? Why the fuck? See, like in Chrono Trigger,

it made so much more sense because you were jumping back and forward in time and like it, like it had a mechanic that was tied to the plot. So it made more sense, you know, in FF six, it was just arbitrarily like however many times you walk through this fucking cave, just ignore it. Just don't look at it for no reason. That was that shit. So both of these, I am convinced are a result of a deal with Prima Guides to sell Prima Game. Well, FF six was like a million years ago. I mean, like 12 and fucking and nine. Wait, oh God, the nine guide was like one of the worst guides ever because it would just say go to this website and the website sucked ass. But like how like the game, like getting to the end of the game

in 12 hours, only to use it for the last little bit like awful. How is that fun? Like that doesn't it sucks ass. It's trash. I would never let my child try and beat FF nine in 12 hours. That is a terrible way to play that game. I see them speed running, slap that controller right out of their hand. You stop and smell the roses. No, don't don't play tetramaster. Don't don't don't smell those roses, but the rest of it. Yeah, you're going to have some decisions to make. Am I I saw I was I was I was I saw scroll by. Hey, Pat, are you going to have your kid play like Nintendo NES games and then SN? No, that's weird. They can start on whatever the new

Xbox is if they even like video games. I so I don't fully agree there in the sense that like I don't know that you need to fucking like time gate anything to create the perfect like that's stupid. But having access to old games and being like, yo, you can check these out too. There's a library of past and present to look at. I think it would be is a good move. And that's something that I would like to do. Yeah, of course. So that it's not always access to everything. But not but not just like being like always not just going like, oh, yeah, it's there. But also like, hey, look, there's some cool stuff from the past that is fun. You know, I mean, it when I would I would walk in and my dad would be watching a bridge too far or bridge

on the River Kwai or any other World War Two bridge movies that came out like 60 years ago. And I'd be like, what's that? And he would say, oh, it's this movie. And then I would watch the movie and go, oh, cool, that old movie was cool. And thus I really like a lot of those old things. Yeah, the idea of my dad sitting me down and be like, hey, you got to start watching movies from Citizen Kane on. Yeah, no, that's insane. Oh, shit. But it just like when it comes to like, hey, check this out, it's cool. You know, same thing for movies, too. Like, I mean, there's some like, as much as you can go watch, you know, frozen and tangled, the Lion King is a fucking awesome movie. Like, yeah, I'm going to pop that in.

You know, just thinking, did you ever see back to the future too? You know, when he goes into the arcade and he's like, where's the arcade machine with buttons? And they're like, use your hands to play it like a baby's game. And I'm just like, oh, no, I can see myself talking to Pat Jr. And we're like, no, you used a controller for these. You didn't, you didn't jack the plug into your brain yet. That was before that. You had to use your hands on a controller and maybe a keyboard. What's a keyboard? No, I yeah, I think I think the move is like, you know, they're going to go with the times, of course, they're going to be interested in whatever is like current and happening. But you're also going to be showing

stuff. And, you know, if you show cool stuff, then in the same way that like old music can garner interest or old films, and yeah, old games can do it too. But you just don't, but don't like, don't like not show anything. And then, you know, just not even bring the possibility up. All right. Here's one with no tabs. Weird square icon that shows up when the game saves. Or the or no, no, no, no, the Oh, wow, you have a physical save icon. That's crazy. Yeah. All right. It's going to be rough. It's going to be rough, dude. Dear insert joke name here. Why War Thunder actually has so many leaks? A lot of people have been leaking classified documents on War Thunder forums, but it's

really discussed beyond why beyond they wanted their favorite tank buffed. The developer and I feel the divide developers, Gaijin, get away easy here. War Thunder has a bug report section where players can and are encouraged to submit historical inaccuracies and vehicles. The game markets itself on accuracy and vehicle performance. So this is kind of a big deal when and this is where the problem comes in. Gaijin will frequently deny bug reports, citing five or so credible sources saying that they're not specific enough. The specifics for vehicles are often classified or they're declassified, but the various armed forces still don't want them to be released to the public. So you have a bunch of military history nerds who read tank

specs for fun that Gaijin have asked to make the game accurate, who all know something's objectively wrong, have shown evidence it's wrong and who are told that it is in fact correct and it will not be changed unless they provide documentation that can only be obtained illegally, but don't actually provide illegal documents. We're just saying that's what we'd need from you. Of course, you'd be crazy to do it. They're just kind of setting it up. I get it. Okay. But it's an F2P game built around selling 50 to $120 tanks to crazies. So I figured you'd do the math. Yeah. Okay. That's 100% it. That makes so much more sense now. No, it's not. Okay. Hey, man, this tank actually moves at this speed. No, it doesn't. Well, here's

all the information I could get from non illegal sources. Not good enough. You'll just have to find something more concrete. Oh no, they broke the law. It makes me think the whole game is like a Psyop for like some kind of foreign military. It could be. Is Gaijin here? Gaijin game or Gaijin entertainment? Yeah. Found it in Russia. Yeah. Okay. I don't know. Is it not impossible? Is that I don't know. I don't know anything. Who could know? I don't know. Yeah. Okay. Great. Great. Who could know even? Well, that'll do it. That'll do it. That'll do it. I once again encourage everyone to not betray your nation for sick stat increases on your favorite tanks. I should also say to not do that, but I think it's cool. So who knows? Who knows?

Hey, once again, I'm going to be streaming over twitch.tv slash Pat stairs at this week. You should come to those streams. It's your it's your responsibility now to come to those streams. You have to do it. There is a lot of responsibilities that are that are new found. Also, anyone who doesn't can now be guilted because they're taking the food out of your kid's mouth. So, you know, the ultimate bit here is to have the baby in my arms and be like, this is what happens when you don't subscribe and then like the bottle out of the baby. Like, see a little animation. You did this. A little animation every time a resub and it's like, oh, bottle goes back in. There you go. Look at you. Look, you've directly you're affecting. That's it.

Oh, god damn it. All right. Well, you know, once again, congratulations. That's fucking insanity. And yeah, I let's like you said, like, let's see what the fucking letters look like next week. Oh, boy, I bet they're going to be fascinating. Take care, everybody. Bye. Have a good week. Bye.