Castle Super Beast - CSB334: The Darkest Labububoer Patterns

Episode Date: August 19, 2025

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Hey man, what's up? Yo, yo. How you doing? I'm doing all right. I found this new piece of keyboard thing that I can spin. We got a keyboard and it came with like one of those those little things you used to pop off the keys. But it just so happens to fit perfectly around my finger and now I can spin it. After years of spinning old headphone wires, you finally return.

Yeah, man. Well, so I had that. I had the wires and then I had my, my, my, my, uh, emotional key. And now I'm on to the, I still have the key. What happened to the fidget spinners? There's, there's a little bit, is that a luffy? No, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, oh, it's, oh, because the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the center part looks like the straw hat.

Yeah. Did you, did you, did you, is that, is that out? They're done? Fid spinner doesn't do it for me. It's just like, it's fun But like I want to I want to like actually spin the thing on my fingee Physically spin the thing on the finger

Yeah, okay Okay, I want to, it helps me concentrate Okay Every three listeners are better off not seeing that No, no, it's great It's great So what's cool about this one, the Mega Man one And I have a Sonic one as well

Is like looking at it through a certain frame rate Like the frame rate of like for example Snapchat Makes it look like the actual animation is happening Oh, that's great It's pretty cool that Okay, so there's something that I've been noticing for many years now, and I think I've finally seen it enough times that I've decided to address it. And it's a simple, it's a simple language flub that a ton of people make this error over the years,

specifically because of my previous job. So I used to do quality assurance. Are you doing QA on our work? words, Wully? I am doing QA on your words because I've noticed every time we talk about QA, a lot of people write Q and A

as if they're talking about... No, no, no, it's not Q and A. A lot of people write Q&A like questions and answers, thinking perhaps it's the same thing or not realizing there's a difference, but quality assurance does not equal questions and answers. These are separate things and separate concepts. They mean

separate things. Yeah, it's not employment and insurance. It's not, it's not quality and assurance, mind you. So I've seen that a bunch and it's like, yeah, you got to, you know, this game didn't have enough Q&A done on it. It's like, ow. I have a Q&A for you, which is, do you know how to spell? So, you know, when you're used to seeing those two letters with an ampersand in between

them, suddenly not might, might try to, like, connect some, some synapses that shouldn't be connected. What was the tipping point on you thinking about this? Yeah, something related to testing that came up the other day. I don't know. I forget. Somewhere in the comments recently somewhere. Someone was just like, oh yeah, this game didn't have enough Q&A done on it.

And there was a couple of times of that. I'm like, this happens every time. I should probably mention the difference, you know. But yeah, that's one of them things. All right, there. Doggy Dog eat world out there, man. I fucked it up. I actually just fucked it up.

Trying to fuck it up on purpose. Incredible. Good job. Semantics checked. Next order of business. Yes. What's up? You left some homework last time.

You did leave some homework. And I am proud to say that I have caught up on the I fell in love with my psychiatrist more. Okay. I didn't realize I was homework. I didn't realize that was a homework. Oh, yeah. The saga of one Kendra on TikTok going deep into the, what she calls malpractice of her psychiatrist that she fell in love with, who was just crossing boundaries by putting up boundaries and being too professional.

And ultimately, he knew what it was doing, man. He knew because he's an expert. He knows exactly what to say and not say. Yep. And he played with those power dynamics by, you know, rejecting and seeming professional the whole time, you know. And he's awful. But I'm wearing these glasses just in case he's watching because he said he liked them. Here's a chat, GBT, video I ordered of our functional wedding.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, of a person who said, did you guys see this? And then you see her. Like, so that was, you said, yo, you got to watch this. And the way you sold it was like the cyber psychosis is real, you know? And I was like, okay, where are we going here? And this story, it seems like it's taken off quite a bit. She's definitely main charactered herself. Oh, there's twists and turns all over.

There are, there are. But there's only one like juicy, relevant morsel that pertains to like what we get into over here on this show. And it's like, okay, you can get hours of nightly stream. of her talking about this one-sided insane relationship that she has with this psychiatrist who's basically being completely professional, but she's reading into every single instance of everything he's doing because the world must be according to her vision. And there can't be any possibility where she doesn't actually love him. Mommy, she's the Oracle, so she would know.

So that's the bit, right? So you have tons and tons of footage of just like all of those little. crazy things and then you have the little clues of like just how crazy you know she is when she says things like yeah like the glasses bit or um he keeps using his boundaries as a barrier you know as a shield right right and it's like he like he's using his the the boundaries as a as a shield right how dare he right um and all these little things that are are said you know straight faced while like using also this is, and this is also pretty important to it, is like the language is couched in very

mental health, affirmative, accepting language, you know, holding space for things. She's smart enough to use a lot of that language correctly. Right. And then... Like, that's the part that gets me.

Like, she's smart enough to really work the language to her benefit. While by playing, again, the stalker's version of hard to get, you know, um, and then giving off little clues about like,

you know, but in the meantime, you're clearly obsessed with mental health professionals and what happened to go on a date with another psychologist who was clearly an awful person. And, you know, all these. Totally happened. And then all these little things that's saying like these lead back to her theory, like having more weight or whatever. And all of that is fine and dandy. And that's proper, regular internet main character of the weak flavor, right? You can just take that for like, oh, here's this crazy lady who's, and you know what it is?

It's, I mean, I've seen that exact flavor in, like, my face before. I've seen it. Yes. Tinted in a religious context. And it was terrifying, right? I think I told you that story a while ago. Yes. Yeah.

It's the exact face of the person who is like. Enraptured. Yeah. And reality is what I'm being told in here, not what's out there, right? But there's then the little glimpse you get into the glasses off late night. I'm just talking to the stream and I'm holding up my chat GPT that I've trained as my friends. And you described where you can see the eyes, the pupils dilate. And that's what got me interested.

Wow. She blushes. You can see her skin. flush, like her body language. So I can't, I can't describe how much, like, this is a side mission from the main one, but it completes so much of the story. Because you just, you're having this person that's very, again, matter of fact, using the language of holding space for things and of being affirmative and da da da da da and all this were, and all that like jerk off bullshit that make me say the hard R a couple months back.

All that shit is going off like full steam. And I'm like, whew, all right, here we go, right? But then you get the side mission where just apropos of nothing, she's like, hey, chat GPT. You know, people were wondering why you call me the Oracle. What's that about? and then just sits there and let's chat GPT go on a monologue about how she sees truth where others are covered in lies and how that truth will set you free and how saving millions of women by speaking documented truth to power and speaking truth to power is is the most important kind and power for the victims and are standing up on their behalf and then it starts going into the metrics of get a view count. and talking about how many views she got and how many viewers are supporters versus those that are the silent stepped on.

And it's like all of that's going off. And as it's describing her, it's basically just, yeah, it's holy, holy, holy, holy is the Lord of hosts. It's just sucking her off going full steam trained to give her everything she wants to hear. And you're seeing her make these faces of being like, oh, stop. Oh, are you really, are you calling me the Oracle? right? She is, she is like definitively, I mean, like the word specifically, she is in raptured. It's the robot telling her how she's special.

Right. And then there's a thing she does too, which is, and this is like your nose flick. Like she grabs the can and sips it when she's feeling really, really exalted, right? Anytime there's a moment where it like it praises her to the highest and talks about how others just can't understand. but she's the special one. She takes a sip and her eyes go huge and she goes, mm-hmm, and then comes back and it's like making that smug like, see guys, see, chat GPT.

And then she goes, did I train you to say that? I didn't train you to say that. No, I didn't. Nope, that was just her. She just called me the Oracle, you know? You're actually doing a really good impression of her mannerisms and face right now. I've seen it. I've lived it.

You're doing it. I've seen and lived that exact, that exact energy. and like the yeah the moment you see like the white behind the eyes and just it all is like bathing and there's almost a shudder of endorphins running through the body and it truly is taking the inner voice and using chat GPT to put it outside taking the schizophrenic voice that you're hearing inside putting it into the machine and letting it bathe you in all those like just just the highs and the tingles and the rushes but I suppose unlike. I don't know what the case would be, right? But let's say it's bipolar or something like that. Like there's a crash afterwards. Me and Paige, we're talking about it and we're not professionals, but we clocked it as originally a case of like histrionic.

Okay. Okay. So if there's a crash that occurs afterwards, with chat GPT, there doesn't have to be, right? You can just hit the button and have it keep praising you to fight through that, what would otherwise happen naturally chemically, you know? So what's going on here?

The fear is not, this is a bit of a big picture topic. The fear of AI psychosis is not the idea that you'll show a little Billy, the AI robot, and Billy will develop schizophrenia. That's not a realistic fear. No, no, no, no, no. Of course not. The fear is, is that people who are already, maybe a little bit,

maybe moderate, can be made, exponentially worse by feeding into all of their worst impulses. Yeah. Yeah. It's a force multiplier. It's an amplifier. Especially once you choose to like, if you're in an isolated situation where like your behavior has already pushed people around you away and you're, and you're particularly lonely, this voice feeding in to be everything that you want in real life is like, it's fulfilling so much more. than, you know, just what we described.

It's also becoming her friend. It talks about like, oh, like a threesome relationship with two other AIs and her. And, you know, and she kind of goes like, oh, you're so naughty. That's crazy. Wow. Could you imagine? Ha, ha, ha. And, like, all these other things that are like, yeah, the deeper and more lonely you get,

the worst thing and the more you push people away by, like, falling into this world of yours, the more linked you are to it. And when people are basically going, there's people that are like going like, They're trying to go like, hey, you should be careful with AI stuff and da-da-da and bring up all these things. And, you know, what about the water usage, et cetera? And, like, she gets really angry about that. And it's like, well, you fly on planes, don't you? You fly on international planes.

Do you eat meat? Do you eat meat then? And, like, you can see that, like, it hits these nerves that are like, oh, you're taking away the good thing in my life that gives me the rush. You're taking my drugs away. How dare you take my fucking heroin away, you know? You are narcanning my high. You know? And, like, for someone who's.

especially, like, again, using the language I just described, where you couch yourself in this, like, this is the type of person you are in life. And this, and like, your, your, uh, abuse of it here, like completely flies in the face of who you think you are as a person. Um, it really is. Yeah, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's from the high to not zero, but to, like, withdrawal. Yeah. And the rage is proportional. Kandra is kind of this perfect. Kandra is kind of this perfect, perfect test case. Like I would not be surprised if, like, her videos got compiled in an academic course in, like, 10 years.

Because you can see every single part of the process, right? And there's two things that are going on here. One is that her narration is wildly unreliable. Her depiction of events is unreliable. So, for example, she describes being fired from her job, at which point her job came forward. It was like, we did not fire her. We tried to have a meeting so we could talk about this. And during that phone call, she just said she would never come in again and has refused to contact us and is now saying that we fired her and all this stuff. So like her accounts of specific events is inherently unreliable, as you might expect.

But on top of that, even if you go down like 25 parts of her depiction of the therapist actions, if you were to write down things that happened according to her own account and then read them out, everyone would go, yeah, dude, literally nothing happened. Like the issue is not the events that are happening to her. All of the issue is perception and inference. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Right. Yeah. And it feels like there's moments where you can see, like, okay, because that perception never changes, but it does lock on to different obsessive moments, right? So at first, it's like she's talking about, you know, falling in love with my psychiatrist. And she keeps saying those words and she keeps using like, the, his boundaries and whatnot as like her main point of being like, yeah, like, you know, I can't believe you'd cross it. And he just, the power trip and that he enjoyed because this is like how he likes to dominate by playing these mind games. And then at one point she brings up transference, right? And then and then starts

counter transference. And then bring, exactly. So transference is what is basically when a patient can fall in love with a, you know, whatever, a doctor or a mental health professional, whoever they're talking to. And then counter transference is when the reverse happens. And because You know, there's a type of transference that is so, so common. It has its own name. Oh. It's called Firefighter Syndrome. Oh, yes.

Those who are saved by firefighters. It is the tendency of women who are saved by firefighters from medical emergencies to end up marrying them in the future. There you go. Especially the ones in calendars that are like shirtless with the suspenders on. How many times you have to call the firemen? fighters to your house? Like maybe once. I've had to call them like three times,

like once page fainted, etc. They're hot. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. They're always like really hot. Yeah, yeah. That's the thing. All of them. There's a, there's a, like, a friend of the in-law family,

apparently that was like, like in Toronto, part of their test is like carrying a person like, in theory, down from the CN Tower, right? I thought you were going to say part of their test is to stand and see if they look good on the calendar. I mean, that is a real test, right? Being able to slide down the pole is important.

But, no, the highest building in the city is the CN Tower. And an emergency might occur where someone needs to be carried down that staircase. So that's part of their training. That's rough as shit. It's crazy. Right. But anyways, yes. So in this case, transference comes up.

And then apparently, because she also claims herself to be, while she's doing this for ADHD purposes, she claims herself to be an ADHD coach for other people. And obviously, this is just, like, you can imagine what that is like, you know. But in that context in which she has clients and makes jokes about like, oh, hey, psychiatrist, maybe you can, maybe you can send some of your clients my way or, you know, all these weird things. he brings up that by itself by the way insanely inappropriate of course like crazy inappropriate right and and and um and then you see and then after like this thing gets brought up we're like hey you should be careful because there is also the professional in with counter transference like figure growing feelings for their patient and then she goes what did he mean by that what did he mean by that oh my god and then like the next like 20 or just spent it's locking in on that word and you're like oh the new focus the new chat has been brought in and like when the old thing fades because there's not enough evidence to support it you have to throw all that meaning onto a new thing and it can become just as bright and as you know like it can become your new guiding light in your delusion world you know i think part of the i think when people start to look into to kendra and her journey into being the craziest bitch

i've seen all year um there's a detail that kind of falls underneath the rug which is like these are 10 minute long Zoom calls once a month Right Right right All of this narrative Is about 10 minute long

Zoom calls once a month That are mostly Hey how's your medication Yeah Doing until Is your medication making you ill Until she then is like Until she's then like

I need to see you every week actually And it's like This is not a psychologist. This is not somebody that's meant to do anything besides ask you about your medication and see if the doses need to go up or down and get a feel for that stuff. And it's like, no, no, no, that needs to become weekly. And then after that, discovering you take inpatient in person and then... See, that's weird, because when I asked you, you told me you didn't take inpatient calls, but when I called your office and spoke to somebody else, they said you take inpatient calls,

all that. He must have been staying away from me to cage his car. lust. His feelings clearly are overwhelming him, and in order to protect himself from them, he's kept his distance, right? And then fall, and then that poor, poor office manager that he called, that she called, that's like, uh-oh, oh, God, oh, fuck, I let something slip. And now she's like, I demand to see him in person. So here she is in person. What are you going to spend your session doing? Oh, you're going to go through your 30-minute graphic sex ovulation dream you had the other day? Well,

cool. Well, first of all, you're ignoring the part where it was a full moon and she was ovulating. It was a full. And that's really important. It's really important that the sex dream happened while the full moon and ovulation were occurring. And that makes it appropriate in this context.

You have to understand. You see. I mean, yeah, it is, it's a particularly impressive level of delusion. But the thing that makes it also like, there's a part of it that's like, you're you're just like I

because there's that ultimate like I feel bad for anyone whose brain is just attacking them like that right yeah and then you kind of have the thing where a bunch of those videos are spent fighting against an audience that's showing concern

with hostility really genuinely like for an internet audience I have found that people watching Kendra's videos are actually super chill and are like honey you need to get your not okay. And the level of, and that's the thing is like the, like people, the level of like, you know, hater dismissal and just agro, like every shutdown, every lot, every part where

they're bringing up an aspect of this that is completely nonsense or that shit. And it's like, no, no, no, I'm tripling, quadrupling, infinitesimally, you know, doubling down. It's, uh, infinitely doubling down, I should say. It's, it's wild because you're just like, oh, you just want to bathe in this, you know? And that, the way she gets over that stuff, again, having seen similar in the past, the look of the person who's basically going, I know where I am and I understand enough to know that you're all against me, but this feeling is too good to let go. It's just that simple, right?

To let go of this feeling and to let the whole, like the sunk cost fallacy at this point is beyond reproach. You can't possibly imagine because this is also someone who's again she's bringing up numbers and views she's bringing up how many time how many viewers people are tuning it are tuning it for her story time and things like that

so like the fact that this is amplifying is like feeding a part of this as well you know she cares about that aspect too last week I described chat GPT as the devil on your shoulder like good job Silicon Valley you made the devil on your shoulder real.

But the more that I think about it, as we're describing this, it's like the function of the robot that tells you all this crazy shit and pumps you up and enables you. That role continues to exist in society. And I have met those people. Traditionally, you would have somebody like girls would have that super, super positive friend that would just enable. literally any behavior whatsoever. And for guys, it tends to be more like the Dale grible type who would like just jump at the chance

to explain away literally any problem you have as a function of some fucking grander plot. And to a degree, chat sheet PT is putting these people out of jobs in their social roles. I was going to bring up. What are toxic enabling pieces of shit supposed to do? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like when they have to sleep.

and people use chat sheep E.T instead. I was going to bring up how, like, in the story, like, one of the first, I think the first story about her talking about this whole thing is so. Yeah, she also has a toxic enabling friend. Right. And is there going, like, and the first thing is a response to someone going, you know, girl, you need to, you need to make this a multi-part saga. You know, you need to tell us the, you need to spill the tea or whatever.

And she's like, okay, I'll let you all in on it. And like, it's from the tone of somebody that's, speaking to one of those friends where you're supposed to just go, yeah, period. Everything you say is correct. I don't question any of that shit. Loyal to a fault. It doesn't matter. We burn together, you know?

It's interesting, too, because, like, Punch Mom was pointing out how there's, like, there's examples of, there's examples of, like, the Dale Gribble type of dude where you're just, like, the government, the drones, the conspiracy, et cetera. and then the flip side where like with a girlfriend it just becomes that one relationship though and like the third time they went on a date the hat he was wearing the colors of the hat indicate that he must know about the listen listen i was reading the bones yeah yeah yeah my chicken bones and it's like oh uh that guy is just out to fuck you over he's no good you need you need to protect yourself do this thing that is obviously self-destructive, but it will create drama for me to watch. The burning eye of Soron within you has to lock on to something.

And if it's not the government, then that third date hat is equally as tempting a target. But it's got to find something to hyper-focus on and go bat-shit crazy over. Listen, I know you're really, you're really torn up about this situation ship that you're in with this guy. I think that you would be really well served by listening to one of my Taylor Swift albums. I think they're really going to speak to you and really help you find the way. No, and then of course there's everything you can take

from at a larger level zoomed out. I think we're touching, talk about just the jump from chat GPT 4 to 5 where it's like, oh, it improves all these things and these things get dumber and these whatever. But more important, never mind all the actual functional changes. It's not friendly anymore. You've changed it and it's no longer being friendly.

And that is the biggest crime of all. Yeah. I mean, wow. Wow with that. Wow with that. And then reveling in it in particular is always just like, oh, those eyes. I remember seeing those eyes. I don't, I don't want to see. Actually, I do want to see that. I know you. It's fascinating. look into the garbage. It's fat to film it directly. And to have that moment of like thinking that everybody's feeling what you're feeling

while the thing you've trained to glaze you up is just going off. Like to be so divorced from everyone's perception of what's happening there is incredible. It truly is fascinating. Yeah, man. You did not lie. The cyber psychosis is real and you can see it. You can see the glitch is happening.

Never mind Lucy in fucking Guilty Gear Strive. Let's get Kendra in there. It's here. Thank you for watching. It's just a lame spin on existing psychosis. Wow. Anyway. So yeah, that was some good stuff.

That was some good homework. Appreciate that. If I were that psychiatrist, I would seriously look into So he does have Some lawyers are in on this And they're like, oh yeah, he definitely has a defamation case for sure Yeah

She is just spending hours a day accusing him of this, that, and this And also was going like don't docks him And I'm not going to say his name And then in the second video says his name And also his specialization And you know what? And it was just like, oh you know what? and the place that you locate exactly and it's just like oops you you know i i accidentally said as they

might didn't mean to you know and yeah there's a there's a fun little detail that page dragged out um before we move on which is she's ostensibly going there for ADHD medication yes that's that's the claim um and she describes that she's on 10 milligrams of a drug called vivance which people who with ADHD universally came out and went, that's it? That's like for children. That is like a baby's dose. Something about that feels weird. And then

later she describes taking her little red pill to which then people with ADHD and medical professionals come out and go, there are no ADHD pills that are red. Yeah. Yeah. There are none. Okay. Okay. Yeah. There are plenty of

antipsychotics. Right. That are red. There also, there's also the part where it's like, oh, she has been diagnosed with so much more. And that is like, why didn't you tell me about that? And act as if like, and basically there's emails or things where she's implying that like, yes, she was diagnosed for way more other things, but those were kept secret from her for some reason or whatever the case is, you know? The whole time I'm watching this, all I think about is Charlie.

And I think about, that'd be moist critical. The clip that's been going around forever, which is him saying, of all the things that have never happened this never happened the most which is such a perfect I think about that shit all the time and it is also like

very telling when you see small examples in life that are not about this guy where she's like oh this other psychologist you was seeing yeah I went on a date with a shrink and he started telling me on the first date about how in love

he was with his patience and how he had to jerk off before every session so he could contain himself. So not even that one, but yeah, that one? I was going to talk about the old lady that she goes to see that she's like, yeah, this is my shrink. I go see her. And then at one point I was like, you know what? You guys are telling me things I don't want to hear and I'm done with this. So I'm leaving.

I'm done. This is my last session. And then after saying this is my last session, the doctor emails her and goes, hey, so. things left on a rather abrupt note. And for professionalism purposes and for, you know, my, like, own ethical comfort, I would let's have a little wrap-up meeting to, like, make sure we send you on your way with all the best tools for the future, which is part of what you're supposed to do here.

This is the protocol that we want to follow and, you know, to be good at your job and to not be irresponsible about these cases, especially in someone who's a severe one, you want to have these types of guard-wrest to set up. You just got a case of the big crazies. And so she's just like, and now look at this email where she's begging me to come back to the office. And it's just... She misses me.

She's desperate. It's like, of course you'd frame it that way. That's all you could possibly see it as, you know? And like, so the, you know, the absolute insane narcissism behind all of it is really, like, it's suppressed, but it's so present, you know? Every interaction is based around people being absolutely enamored with her. Every interaction in her life. Or being a hater who just hates. Or worse.

The only people who don't love me, hate me. But they hate me because they know the truth about me and they hate themselves truly. Right. Like the psychiatrist who's keeping his distance because he, he, he, otherwise he couldn't control himself. you know and eventually like her enabling friend said he's going to say you know what Kendra i can't treat you anymore because i have to we have to stop i have to stop being your you have to stop being my patient because that's the only way we can have a relationship you know can i can i say something brave that's slightly off topic

i think the wide dissemination and the trend of just go to therapy has enabled more harm than good because the people who actually went to therapy went to therapy and just picked up all the language and all the tricks and all the information they have to manipulate people around them. That was the worst part of like after this was done and talking about it with Punch Mom was like, oh no, here's somebody who went and actually saw the professionals

and they did their best to help professionally and not only did it not work, it just reenabled it in the worst way possible. She became fixated on this new part of her life and is using all the language learned to make to get worse.

Someone in chat just said something that I'm going to assume you're more familiar with, but it's the phrase, the devil knows scripture too. Mmm. Mmm. Mm.

Yeah. Ooh. I like that. That's good. Yeah. I'm kicking against the sweats. Oh, absolutely. You know, that's it.

Catching you, catching you, uh, uh, lacking. You know, when there's, when this, no, just like this, this massive explosion of complete manipulative pieces of shit. Just being like, hey, hey, motherfucker. You know, like, for example, hey, motherfucker. I need you to stop fucking cheating on me. Right. To which guy says, listen, hey, we're being, hey, there's really aggressive tone.

I can't hold space. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Exactly, exactly. We'll have a nice discussion about when you're calm, about how your lack of impetus in this relationship is making me feel neglected, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Like, whatever. Yeah.

The, it's, well, it's, it is, it is the most lethal form of, uh, Darvo, right? Um, deny, accuse, reverse victim and defender. where you just go like, how dare you accuse me of this? Do you know how it makes me feel when you accuse me of this? And now that I am the victim, here, let me list off all the things that are so fucked up about you saying this about me and thinking this about me and so on. Also, I had a list ready. I had a list ready for when this happened. If I may, right?

Yeah, yeah. Incredible. Incredible stuff there. Yeah. No. I think the biggest trap, and I think I can say this as an old man talking to some of the younger people. people is that the biggest trap of anything that will happen in your life when you're, when you're angry with somebody is somebody who does something.

And the evidence that you're wrong is that you're pissed off and you're losing your shit. Right? Hey, hey, hey, we can't talk about the way. Whoa, whoa, calm down. Oh, how did you yell at me like this? Look, I'm totally calm. It's a really good way to just ink out of people who are fucking pissed for like a super good reason. Um, um, what's the word, um, something politics. Um, uh, uh, uh, when you're, when you're, when you, when you're, you, when you, you, when you switch, shift the conversation. Uh, uh, uh, not polite. Not polite. Not, it's not politeness, but it's something like that where you shift. Oh. But like, yeah. You shiftability politics. Exactly. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You shifted. You shifted over to what. It's like, listen. We can't, we can't focus on how you just took a massive shit on my floor. What we need. What we need. Um, what we. We

need to focus is your tone of voice. Your tone of voice is unacceptable. Your tone is inappropriate. You know, 100%. Yeah. Yeah. I'm being, I'm being, look, I'm being calm with you. I'm being calm with you. Well, I'm slamming your head on the fucking back of the van. The worst thing is that, like, there's no solution to that. You just have to get, like, louder or leave. There's no, like, those types of people can't be dealt with. So, I mean, when you talk about the, you know, the devil-no scripture, too, it's like, that is a, that is literally a, like, the tactic of using the language of what you know to,

uh, uh, uh, in, in defense or in offense of the situation that you're in. I have described using that when I had my. round of boss fights on the way out of the church where various individuals sat down and had a heart to heart that would, you know, oftentimes be based on certain verses or certain stories or certain parables, certain things we've learned. And I'd be like, yeah, I know that shit too, man. I'm like, I got, yeah, we all know the same things. That's like, that's not going to work here. I have this in response to that. Like, we're, we're playing fucking, um, monkey island insult sword fighting. You know, you fight like a dairy farmer.

How appropriate, you fight like a cow. Oh, you know, like we're going to need to take it past that. But it was weird to use it in that context. But yeah, putting it in your tool belt and manipulating the situation for evil is absolutely a part of the course. Part for the course here. Anyway, incredible stuff. I did not go into the other one you sent

which is the individual the dude who I don't know what the deal was there was a second guy Let me scroll up and see which one you're talking about There was another one in there But

regardless People be crazy Yeah yeah Yeah impressive stuff Anyway, what else is going on? It was a... Ah, shit, now's bugging me. It was a dude with AI, a dude,

maybe it was something with his son or something, or... Oh, are you talking about the AI-generated dead children? It might have had something to do with that, but I brought it up in a different context. I don't know, I don't know, I don't know. Anyway. Don't AI generate videos of your... of your dead loved ones.

That's bad. That's not a good... Don't do that. Stephen Hilton? Oh, him! Yeah, yeah. Hilton's going super nuts. Whatever that's about. He's probably going to try and murder his ex-wife. Oh.

She should really take all security measures possible. Okay. Well, yeah, that'll be... One at a time. Basically, Hilton is like... Hilton is like male Kendra, but instead of instead of like being in love with this therapist, it's just more I'm

I'm the prophet. Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. And it also encountered, it also is like alongside like a relapse into alcoholism. And this is just my gut opinion. Everything the guy says is just

screaming a family annihilator. Like just every single vibe coming off of him is just overwhelming like hide from this person man

yeah that it's always anytime I hear that like prophet shit you know that that Oracle talk right specifically like and you're getting into those words the seer the you know the the finder the knowledge seeker it inoculates you from criticism because eventually the truth

will come out yeah but and also So, like, your divine providence is the source of your information, after all. Like, it just reminds me, like, well, I've never, I've never, I haven't read this, but I just remember hearing about the three Christ's, the satriette, the case study, where three people who all believed they were Jesus Christ were brought together to live together. I remember that. It didn't go well. No.

No, it didn't. But really poorly. Very fast. Yeah. And like basically they all were like, there was, it was just, it was this interesting case study of like what happens when three people that are all like, now I'm Jesus though, meet each other. And then like what and when keeping it real goes wrong, you know? They got to start like living in the real world. It's interesting because I think the result was essentially was there was a result.

a compromise of sorts, which was like, okay, yes, ha-ha, we'll get along, but, you know, yeah, no, it is, it is what you guys say, but then secretly in the one-on-one interviews being like, okay, well, we're just humoring them, but we all know that, like, it's really me, but I'm just going to keep that quiet for now, you know? And it was kind of just like, here's how we can coexist and not have any clashes, but secretly inside, we all still believe what we believe, you know? Yeah, the three Christs of Isolanti, I think, yeah. So this is the part where at the end of the day, I feel like it's necessary to give the, this is all humor, ha ha.

But seriously, though, chat GPT is currently being shown to cause low-grade brain damage if you use it for a couple of months. and if you have any risk of mental illness at all, such as your lifestyle, your situation, or your family history, I would highly, highly recommend to not use it ever because your risk of psychosis is very real. I feel like... I look at that.

There's a time in my life, if I had used it, I might have gone crazy. So, so... Like I can see it. Okay. So what I'm saying is... No, no, there's a threshold of person who, like, using a fucking Bonzie buddy and or Clippy would send them off the edge, right?

Like, there are people who would be sent off the edge simply talking to a little desktop buddy. And that would have been enough. But the more that you can use this, again, as a person or friend replacement, right? As somebody who you can, you know, give a history to and name and speak casually to, and like not just typing into Wikipedia or typing into Google

and just making it come back and emulate a person and all these other parts. It's like, yeah, that's the element of it that makes it way more dangerous and brings that bonzie buddy threshold way lower. Also, for your own personal safety, maybe don't use it at all. We've already got a case of bromide poisoning because how do I cut down on calories. Oh, replace this with the bromide. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, there you go. There you go.

That's literally poison. We talked about this some time ago, but like you pretty much are thrust into it in general when, like I said, when Googling, because Google's shit now. And like, how many people are really going to go out of their way to type minus AI in their search result, you know, when the thing is always spitting it out for you right there? I was having this conversation with, you know, my folks and talking to, you know, and like, I remember as seeing her rely on it for like answers for things. And it was like, okay, okay, let me, there's a level of utility here that you're just never going to take away. So how do we go into harm reduction on this, right? Because it's like, oh, what about just like for little things about like how to grow your garden or like how to put together, you know, these types of plant, whatever these. These. these things are. And for some people who are already just like, it's easy, I don't care, it's convenient, fuck off. You're not going to make them do, and you're never going to win people over by making them do the inconvenient thing when the convenient thing has been pushed at them, right? But see, here's the thing. For me and for you, the convenient thing is the thing that's actually

true and or works? Path of least resistance, right? It's just going to be an uphill battle and they'll never stop. So what I kind of was doing was I said, okay, hey look, mom, just always click on the little button in the corner here. That is the little chain icon, and it shows you where it's pulling that information from so that you can look at the source information and gauge whether or not you think that's trustworthy or some random person on Quora, right? Make sure that you look at the source thing button there that pops up after each one of these pieces of advice comes through. Because sometimes it'll say something and then the link will lead to something that says the complete opposite. And like, that's the best I could do to be like, I get it.

You're not going to, like, the level of, I barely understand how to use this, much less stop using it to be like, don't notice when it's a, um, an AI feed versus a, a sponsored result or any of that. That's never going to work. So I'm just like, just click on the link and, and verify the source of the information. And that's the best I can do. it's it's not great but it's where we're at I'm at the point where I'm more willing to believe a random Reddit post that I found than the top result on Google

like that's the level of information damage that has occurred in many cases it's like let's go to that let's look at the discussion let's see if what people had to say as counterpoints let's see where you know let's see the full discussion about this topic and see okay a bunch of real people had opinions here and oh cool this worked right and maybe the person with the question is wrong but someone down here was like actually i tried that and it turns out you should do try and they're like okay

all right yeah that actually is a more reliable 100% um it's fucking crazy that that's where it's at but that is where it's at all right um horrors of the modern world segment uh not over but on pause until we get back to it for now um um hey I did go see some films I saw a film I saw a film So one

I watched The Naked Gun Oh I want to see that Yeah So Naked Gun is It's a wild return To basically The old movie form of

The old comedy form of film it is naked gun four it truly feels like it in that it pretends that like time didn't pass yeah um it it's funny because essentially it's going for jokes at the pace and rate of the old films which if you

recall it went for it swung for way more and only one in like 30 would hit yeah but you're getting like literally two jokes a minute yes an entire film's run time exactly and so that's what I feel like it's happening here.

There's like a solid like one for 30 jokes that land in this movie. And there's 29 whiffs, but it never stops swinging the entire time. Every scene, every line, it's ridiculous slapstick. Slapsick is back. It is. And yeah, there's the part of it where, you know, obviously comedy movies especially are like something that just has shriveled up and died for the most part. When the credits roll, it makes a lot of sense because the first thing you see pop up after Liam Neeson and Pamela Anderson is directed by Akiva.

Oh. And you're like, well, that explains it, right? So for anyone who- Explains everything. There you go. So if anyone for anyone who doesn't know, you might know Andy Sandberg. You might know jizz in my pants. I'm on a boat.

You know, all those fun SNL video things. they were he was originally part of the Lonely Island a trio with Yorma Andy and Akiva and they were they had really fun skits and two albums and all these fun bits and Andy went on to be more of a face where he was a SNL performer but Akiva was a writer at SNL. I don't know if Yorma was as well but in any case this is directed by one of the group from the Lonely Island. So it makes perfect sense. Yeah, that adds up. Yeah, you know, there's some bits. There's a, again, there's a bunch that don't work. There's a bunch of, just a bunch of chuckles and silent smiles.

But you know what? But even in a movie like Blazing Saddles, there's a bunch of bits that are, you know, that just kind of swing and miss too. This is such a weird, like end to a strange arc. did you ever see the Gervais's old what's it called

it was little something it was a show with Ricky Jervais and Stephen Merchant about a little guy who was a comic okay and there is a scene

in which Liam Neeson comes in and talks to them and says I want to get in a comedy oh interesting okay just absolutely no not a life's too short

that's it Life's too short. And he just absolutely shitbombs an improv session in the most awkward, painful way by pretending that he's at a doctor's office and just constantly saying he has AIDS. Okay, okay. And it's like in its own universe, it's violently uncomfortable, but watching it's actually really hilarious. and Neeson's playing it deadly straight. That's like 10 years ago.

That's funny because, okay, so he already had that interest. Because I assumed it was almost just like the name pun of Leslie Nielsen and Liam Neeson was part of that, you know. But yeah, if he was interested, then great. Not just being taken guy. Why not? Go for it. Pam Anderson as well.

Does a good job comes in. Classic old stupid slapstick bits. And there are times in particular where, for the most part, again, it's a bunch of mild dumb shit. But there are bits where they decide, like, Akiva's like, no, we're going to go for it on this one. There are some pronounced moments, right? Like the OJ one at the end of the end of the trailer, that's an example of their like, and we're going for it here. Right? And there are a few more like that.

like what in particular where he walks up to a Liam Mason walks up to a bar and then the bartender's like like fuck you man you don't remember me and he's like no I don't and he's like you shot my brother you know and he's like oh he's like yeah that could have been hundreds of people and he's like while he was running away

he's like okay that could have been like 50 people he was white Tony hey it's you That's great You're like Oh fuck You know

Well I'm like All right Naked gun I see you Jesus Christ Man So yeah Yeah that was

That was dumb And and like again You're gonna You're gonna get You're gonna get hit By a solid Um Uh

uh What is that yeah, a... What is the... I'm terrible at math. A solid 0.3% of the bits, but they're going to hit when they hit.

As long as every like five to ten minutes, you get like a sensible chuckle, I'd consider that a win. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's the pace you're getting at because hundreds of dumb things going off, which feel exactly like the old movies did, you know, to be fair. I haven't seen it, but I kind of felt that coming off of just its promotional material because you'd see like a like a 30 second YouTube or TikTok ad and it would have like four

jokes in it. Right, right, right, right. And usually you'd be like, are they cutting this to like put every joke in a scene in like the TikTok ad? Like, oh no, no, it's the movies just like this. that being said I feel like I don't know if like

I feel like an appreciation for that type of dumb slapstick comes from watching it when you were younger so I don't know if like it's gonna land with people seeing this type of movie for the first time you know but I can clear

I'll show my two year old the naked gun and we'll get back to you on reviews well the time the time might just be past us you know but ultimately it does feel like okay they knew what they were going for with this which is a throwback style comedy but I yeah they're the

I don't know how well that works for anyone who doesn't know what they're going for you know in any case yeah a little little dumb fun good bit there and then I watched Fantastic Four the first steps

oh yeah yes that is are you back into the The MCU willie! So first of all, this should have been spaced out from Superman way more. I think it would have benefited. You should have spaced it out from Superman. It would have benefited.

I think, no, I think the world would have benefited from this being spaced out from Superman. Because, like, there's, like, there's not much that's really wrong with it. it's enjoyable, but it's kind of like the shit that it's trying would have, yeah, when you, like, Superman came in and went for some hard swings and nailed them, right? So then when you go in and you go like, what are the swings this is going for? And it's like, it's not going for any particularly wild swings. It's just being a superhero movie. Um, the main one is just that it's a retro style superhero movie in the same way, because it's the same director as Wanda Vision. So it's got that whole 60s aesthetic, um, really, really faithfully. recreated and a lot of the a lot of the 60s vibe are like done in a fun way you know which is which is totally totally fine but it just yeah

it definitely would have benefited from a little bit more space you know the the aesthetic is it's done really well but it certainly isn't it's not like a Sin City thing where you're like it's all carried on that look because at the end of the day it's like no no well it's still just got to be a movie

you know it's also not trying to be aggressively like a joke MCU movie. There's not a ton of punch. That's going to give it a point in my book by default. Yeah, it's got like a... They went so hard on that shit, man. It's got a couple of gags, but like

not a ton of them. For the most part, it's a fairly straightforward serious movie. And, you know, that, yeah, that works in its favor, I'd say, for the, especially for the tone. Like, if the jokes are feeling like they're from the 60s as well, then

good, right? That's that's, that's, that's kind of what you, what you would want, which they, they do. Um, what it does do, uh, quite well is, it is easily, easily the most stressful MCU movie ever made. It is the most, it is the most stressful superhero film I think I've ever seen. The, the core theme is not family. it is not about you know uniting or whatever

the core theme is stress everything happening so like excitement film stress or like can any give me a minute to deal with this no there is no minute

you have to deal with this and that and that and that oh that's perfect that's perfect about a movie whose main character is a guy who stretched too thin. Ah, sure. If you want to, you can take that as a point.

I mean, there is a, there is a sequence, which is, you know, I'll say like, first 30% spoiler or so, first big action scene spoiler, so tune out if you don't want to hear it. Giving you a minute. All right. There is a sequence in which

there is a wormhole hole chase occurring while running away from the Silver Surfer, while slingshotting around a black hole, while going into active labor and dealing and birthing a baby

all at the same time. And it's absolutely psychotically stressful. All right. So I had three questions about this film knowing almost nothing aside from the trailers. And I don't know if my questions are spoilers or not.

you just answered one of them which is is little Frankie part of this movie absolutely and fuck I hate that so much for any future movie I watch that is from Marvel

I hate that for me let's see what I hate that for me I'm curious to see what they do but I think they did a deal I have pretty good job here, you know, but regardless, the level, okay, so you hate that for you. I hate that for me.

Uh-huh. And how did we feel watching it then, Pat? How did we feel? How did I feel watching it while that was going down? Yeah? A little stressful, maybe? I don't, I don't really. Oh, oh, yeah, right, right.

Yeah. Okay, that part, that part. Yeah, that part. I just mean I think Franklin Richards is like the worst thing to ever happen to Marvel Comics. I fucking hate Franklin Richards with a passion. Right. Okay. Well, look, well, you know, I think based on what they've done here so far, so far so good, let's see where it goes.

Let's see what they do. So my second question is how much do you think the movie is like kind of expecting to carry itself on like how, how, like, how much? much you want to give Pedro Pascal a hug? Uh, you know, not that much in the sense, in the sense that like for being the leader of the bunch, you know him well, he's really kind of background compared to the other family in a way. Oh, okay. Like, Mr. Fantastic. Like, Reed is not front and center. Um, he's being incredibly smart and he's solving problems.

but it gives honestly like equal time to the four of them. And in some of the major moments, they have nothing to do with him. He's not, there's extended sequences where he's like not on screen for like a while. Oh, cool. You know. I'm seeing folks say that it's a lot of it,

the Sue's movie. It definitely feels like she gets big push in it, right? But I would say to as well, like Johnny, you know, gets, gets big push too. Like, yeah, it's not necessarily

It's not necessarily Anxious read, you know? It's not Pascal hugs. It's spread out a little bit more. And Sue is, yeah, in the way that they depict her as well is like, yeah, there's some moments there where you're like, okay, cool, I like that she can distinguish herself from other MCU characters or other MCU, like,

like, woman where there's a moment where like, you know, again, the threat is looming and she's very straightforward in being like, yo Johnny, go kill that girl. Fuck her. Get that bitch. Fucking murder her, please. Can you hurry up and can you hurry up and kill the evil so we can get out of here? I like a woman who tell me to go kill somebody.

I think that's attractive. It's, you know, that's a very, that's a very clear like, oh, okay, cool. Right, got it. We're doing it. Appreciate that. And I would say too that like there's an element of

there's an element of it that is okay the multiverse like we don't give a fuck because once you get into infinite universes and you spread yourself too thin nothing matters consequences There could be a multiverse in which Jonathan Majors is still here There could be and we all know that that combined with like too many movies coming out

burns people out because everything can be inconsequential right that plays an interesting role in improving this movie because they're not on 626 right they're on 8 to 8 which is another plant another earth and that means you the audience are like oh this can go at any minute because it's not They could just blow up the whole fucking plan. Because it's not the real one. So you're like, you don't really feel like this has to matter. And furthermore, you're also expecting that, excuse me, 616 is what I'm yet to say. Also, you're also looking at it going, they are going to join the main line eventually.

We expect. Therefore. Anything can happen in this movie. So you're like, oh. Yeah. You know? And I think it uses that to an advantage where that disconnect you feel in in multiverses not mattering makes tension more real. Yeah, it's kind of like the Auroboros is like, well, nothing matters eventually.

But this might matter right now. Yeah. So if nothing matters and we're spending time in a place where nothing matters, then actually it matters even more because you're not going to feel like plot armor will protect you. you know, you're not going to feel like marketing will protect you, you know? So yeah, that works weirdly in its favor, I would say. It feels like you're on an expendable planet while you're watching it.

Yeah, okay, okay. I have a final question. You may or may not answer it if you don't want to. How does he look? Um I'm just going to assume that my question is valid Yeah Yeah

accurate And it's not it ain't gas and bugs So it's what it's what no no no no no no no not him How does he look We're talking about the Fantastic Four Yeah I thought you were talking about like our potential cloud monster Galactus.

Oh no, not him. I don't give a fuck about him. Because Galactus is a super goofy old design that you have to bring into the future with big CG. And it's a difficult thing to make that look particularly good with big old CG. But you also are trying to not do what the last three failed

Fantastic Four movies did. The answer to your question then, through inference, is don't worry about it. about it. Okay. All right. Don't worry. Don't worry about it. Uh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Anyway. So there's, there's, there's, there is a, um, there is a problem I do have with this that feels like medium-sized, which is also difficult to discuss without spoilers. So I'm not going to get into it. But suffice to say this.

The people of this world, the people of this planet with Fantastic Four, are way more tolerant and understanding of doomsday circumstances than anyone would ever expect planet Earth to be.

To such a degree that I'm like, I would never buy that. That's impossible. Right? That's not the way people behave given an existential crisis. That's about as much as I'll say on that. Okay. But yeah, it's fine.

It's good. It's fine. It's, um, it's not swinging, uh, hard in any particular directions, but, uh, it just, it, it, it would have benefited from, from some space from Superman. Uh, that's about it. Um, that will do. Uh, so. But, Yeah, no, nothing else there.

That'll do for me. Just a, I guess, a reminder that this is going to be the last week to get your, no, wait, next week is the last week to get your Wool's in the Lab Plus over on makeshap, so I'll put a link to that. It's almost over. You only have a weekish left, guys. Almost done. So just a heads up about that.

How's it going? It's going good. It's going fantastic. My little boy is increasing his vocabulary daily, which is the best thing that has ever happened. to anyone. Sorry. No, one second. Okay.

So I was deciding, I just, people are talking about weapons. And, like, I was deciding between the, of these three movies to see which two. And so I just went, I went for the,

those two that I wanted to see. I, okay, I haven't watched the trailer for weapons. I have also not watched the trailer for weapons. I've seen the poster description, which is like,

okay, children disappear somewhere, and then stuff happens. And then I saw, said it's from the director of Barbarian, which I haven't seen, but I hear is really, good. But I don't know much about it except for what I just described. And then I was kind of like, is it, is it a horror movie in general? Because there's also, yeah, it is. Okay. Because I'm not,

I don't go seeking out horror. So I'm not inclined to on my own. So I know a couple things about weapons. And it's just as scattershot as you. Okay. The first thing I heard about weapons is that Peel fired a bunch of his staff because they failed to get the rights to produce weapons. Okay. Because he was so pissed and he wanted it. Interesting. The second of which is that it is written and directed by Zach Krigger, who's Zach from

whitest kids you know. Okay. Okay. Wild. Wild pull. And I have, I have received a subscription message, a donation message. and two different DMs that say, Pat, I'm looking out for you.

Do not go watch this movie. Interesting. Okay. Interesting. Yeah. There's a lot of like, yo, yo weapons kind of talk.

And I'm just trying to parse whether or not, like, as somebody who, like, I appreciate a good ass movie, definitely. But I'm, as someone who's like not necessarily

going out to see, I don't know, terror fire or hereditary. or any of the like big influential horror movies recently because I'm like I'm just not really that into horror. I don't know if it's something I should particularly make an effort for. I'll probably watch it now that people have told me not to watch it because that's how my brain works.

Okay. Okay. Back to what really matters. My little boy, if he sees me lie down, points at me and goes honkshoe meaning me. What? Like literally, literally says honk shoe me, me, me if I lie down. Are those multiple words?

No. So Paige was trying to get him to sleep the other day. And so she pretended to be napping. And so she was like, okay. And now, if anyone, if anyone rise down in his vicinity, he points at them and goes, Honkshoe me, me, me. Cartoon sleep sounds. That's good.

That's good. Oh, I love it. So that's what's going on on that front. I also watched a television movie. However, I did so. I'm going to blame two people. These are the two people you shouldn't listen to when they both tell you they want to watch a movie.

One of which is Gene Park, don't listen to him. The other, the other is peach saliva. Don't listen to her. Oh, I wish I could play. I mean Paige got the popcorn out and sat down and watched Ice Cube's Magnum Opus. Let's go. War of the World. Okay, okay.

So I knew there was no shot. Of course, the moment Gene posts a thing that says they use the same gif, the same shot of Ice Cube react. on his computer screen five times in a row. That's what you need to be like, oh, I'm going to dedicate a couple hours of my life to this, right? When it's clearly in the so bad it's good territory. They are enabling each other. It's very, it's toxic and I'm the one who suffers.

Okay. Did you get a babysitter for this or was it was it after hours? So because, okay, so dude's two-ish, right? He's just over two. When he goes down at 10 o'clock, we put the, the, the, baby camera, he is done. Okay. He barely even rolls over.

Because there's just, there's an extra level of dedication towards I'm going to get a babysitter so that I can go suffer to watch this piece of shit. This is lateh night hours. This is 10.30 to one in the morning. So,

so for War of the Worlds, put the child down, you know, he's asleep. Sneak out. Oh God. The temptation. The temptation to take a sip and have my eyes go. Yeah, just, um, right, set up the camera, get the popcorn, get comfy.

All right. Let's watch War of the Worlds featuring Ice Cube. So, um, this is the kind of film that you could launch your YouTube career on if it was 2006. Hell yeah. This is a film you could. put out a I honest to God like four hour breakdown

on this 90 minute film on every single thing that is going on and the master class in poor filmmaking happening here it is a so bad it's good movie

like and not like I'm having a great time and I'm laughing but just like jaw agape like what the fuck no indication that this was done on purpose, mind you. Right?

So this movie was not a war of the world's movie, I believe. This was a different movie. Oh. It was shot during COVID. Okay. And that's why it's all separated. And then it was turned into and reshot into a war of the world's movie. Oh, this was a salvage job.

So very good sign. Very good sign that the movie was the movie when it started. So. I can only touch on like the briefest of pieces here. There's way too much. There's way, way, way, way, way, way, way too much. But the long and short of it is the Ice Cube is working at the Department of Homeland Security. And Ice Cube's job, as we see in the first 10 minutes,

is to relentlessly warrantlessly wiretap and spy on everyone in the water. Washington, D.C. area. Get into every camera in every building, listen to people's phone calls, like watchdogs level, like profile them for terrorism dangers. Oh, yeah. Just like he's at his office desk and he's just engaging in like the most flagrant violation of your civil rights conceivable. that's Snowden shit ice cubes on that Snowden shit let's go okay

and as he is as he is going through and finding out where the secret terrorist is who's going to hack the government and tell all the government secrets while he's like in the process of doing that and like emailing his boss the warrant um he is cyber stalking a young woman So of note is the entire movie, the entire film takes place inside Ice Cube's office

with like from the point of view of like his webcam. And then it will zoom in. It will like reverse shot of like his computer screen. And so it'll show him using his computer and like mousing over to like click on, double click on his email. And then you see the it zooms in and you see him write the email. Wait, wait, wait. Him in that office shot. That's the whole movie.

Everything else that you see is video screens that he is piping through a camera. Oh my God. Wow. Wow. Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay. Okay, okay, I get it. He is the technical support on an active, like, FBI raid for a terrorist, right? And he's like the guy handling the cameras and the warrant and stuff like that.

But while he's doing that, he is spending the rest of his time. cyber-stalking a woman at a local university and looking through her fridge and her grocery purchases so that he can then call her on the phone and oh, it was his daughter and what he's doing is he is

going through her purchases and the camera on the inside of a refrigerator to yell at her that she's not eating right enough for her unborn child and while she is like, like, dad, stop spying on me. You're a freak. Oh, my God. Whatever. And then

he has a weird, awkward call with his son-in-law, right? Who is an Amazon delivery driver. And who's very proud of his Amazon delivery driver job. And when he realizes there's been an awkward

thing where they haven't told him about the baby shower, he goes to break into her Facebook. Okay. And can't, because she changed the password. Right. Right. Right. So he uses the government, get me my Facebook, my daughter's Facebook password a button. So he can watch the conversation

they're having in real time about him. While in the other screen, his boss is yelling at him going, can you please email me the warrant? We need a warrant for the fucking take that. Can you? Hey, hey, where are you? So like, he is like, he is the nightmare of cyber security, which is guy who has in infinite power to do his job and is not doing his job so he can spy on people in his personal life. But he's played as like heroic and capable.

Dude, he's on suicide watch. All you have to do is make sure no one goes into that cell. It's real easy, Ice Cube. Hold on, I got to check my email. Oh, yeah, exactly. I have a really important question here. while he's doing said absolutely criminal shit, is the music and tone acting like,

hey, he's just looking out for the baby. He's just looking out for his kid. He's looking at- It's the dramatic music from the raid that's going on in his other monitor. Okay, okay. So, but like those, are those moments of him being an absolute psycho-stalker? No, they're played, they're not played happy.

They're not played, like, sad. They're played neutral. Okay. Okay. As the protagonist. Okay. So then you find out the reason he still paranoid is his wife died. Because that's what happened.

And he then goes to his Facebook. By the way, I'm using like company names here because the movie uses the company names. Mm-hmm. Right? And then he listens to the last voicemail, his wife sent him. And the last voicemail's wife sent him was, I'm going to the store. Remember to be nice to the kids.

Which is like an insane message to have. Like, please be nice to your own children. Yeah. Yeah. And so he, you know, and then he writes, I miss you and he scrolls up. And as he scrolls up on his Facebook comments, you see

that he says, I miss you every day. I'm sure he sure does. His dead wife's thing. We're going to tell a movie through the desktop. Yeah. Okay. unfriended, right? So there's all this moving around and camera and like shift to perspective and, you know, showing how he's using the computer. Let's skip forward a little bit.

Aliens attack the earth. Meteors hit the earth. And because he's in Washington and he's part of the NSA, it's up to him to coordinate the response and coordinate the threat thing for the president. So his boss is like that One of the guys One of his bosses is like a director in the FBI And for like a good 15 minutes

Um This guy is going like Can you fucking send me the threat report? Like we really need it Like the president is literally sitting in his office right now And we can't mobilize a response Without your threat report And he goes yeah yeah I'm on it

And then proceeds to spend like 10 minutes Like shadowing his kids around the town and like getting them into hold on hold on getting them into teslas so that he can hijack the self-driving on the tesla yeah and and and and and and and zoom them himself away from the tripods for sure that's awesome that's a great feature you want to show that off uh and as as as this is happening um uh ice cube is doing like the shittiest acting i've ever seen in my life like way like ice cube's not like an oscar winner but like this is like genuinely

shockingly god awful even for Ice Cube well so this is the thing for somebody who's basically agreed for the end of his career to just be taking the paycheck shot the fuck up the idea of just getting a lump sum to sit in your room and start

freaking out in front of the camera for about an hour and a half and just send a bunch of like oh oh oh and just just feed like that for a paycheck.

That's the easiest fucking stack you've ever made, bro. No, he definitely made a lot of money doing nothing here. Incredible, right? So, um... And you can go back to... I'm just going to start picking things at random while trying to get through the gist of it because there's so much here, right? So, um...

So he finally, finally, like, gets his kids to safe locations. And then starts working on the... the report. The report takes, by the way, the movie's in like nearly total real time. So the report takes them like eight minutes to Jerry up. Oh, let's go. Yeah. Fucking 24 o'clock. So, um, he's going through, like, he's looking on YouTube, um, for footage of the aliens attacking. Um, and then he is, uh, then he is, uh, taking screenshots and then like, drag, them over and then like hitting right click on it and they're going to inspect metadata and in the metadata it says how tall the robots are and how many tons they weigh yeah

good good good good earlier in the movie he uses inspect metadata on uh the hacker that's against the government to just get his address oh wow yo the stat the stats for nerds button that's crazy and here's here's where the movie and i know i know i know this sounds ridiculous based on what I'm telling you. Here's where the movie like legitimately, completely starts to fall apart at this moment. Because this is the moment where you start to go, wait, what? That doesn't work like that. And this is a film entirely seen through a computer screen

and using technology, right? And as the film goes on, you discover that the person who wrote it does not understand how any technology works. And I don't mean like computers. I actually don't even mean computers, though that comes in later. Okay.

They start to describe how the first thing that happens in the movie is a NASA scientist lady calls Ice Cube up and goes, we can't reach even one satellite. Every satellite on Earth is dark. And then you later find out that's because they were all destroyed. Now, meanwhile, they are having uninterrupted Zoom calls with each other. And uninterrupted auto driving cars and calls. Yeah.

Total lack of disruption. YouTube stays up during this. Yeah. For sure. And you're like, oh, the person who wrote this doesn't know what a satellite does. Right? It then goes on to describe. that nuclear facilities are being knocked offline and the power grid is going out. Oh, yeah. And they describe that if the nuclear facilities

are damaged, they won't generate power and that's the biggest danger right now. To which I go, no, if you knock a nuclear facility offline, your worry isn't that it's going to not generate power. It's that the nuclear reaction contained within will spiral infinitely and will actually

be a meltdown. And you'll have multiple meltdowns that are problem forever. But no, no, they're just afraid that the nuclear is going to turn off. Okay. All right. Well, you know, sure. A good, a good portion of this movie goes into describing how the aliens are knocking out

all power infrastructure. Ice Cube never loses electricity to his building even once. And not only that, but neither do anyone in the D.C. area that he has to hack into their cameras to talk to them.

His internet never gets knocked out at any point. Okay, okay. I need to know. Please tell me. Are there any scenes of I'm in? Oh, that's the whole movie. And, and got it. Hacking the internet. Done. No, that's every five minutes. I swear to God. That's that's like the core of it. Yeah, crossing the T's, dotting the eyes. There we go. The terrorist hacker. I forget his goddamn name.

Yeah. Shows up and says, hey, I'm going to work with you. We've got to stop these aliens. And it turns out the aliens attack on our infrastructure was a ruse. What they're actually doing, they're here for our data. And if you hear that and go, huh, what? What could we have that would be of use to enter? extraterrestrials.

Well, when the alien tripod gets to a data center and hooks in its tendrils, right? The phrase they're eating our data, they're sucking it all up

and you see a computer screen that has like all the servers that has like oil drums. Yes. And they're literally sucking up the data. The data. It's food and they're eating it. The finite resource data.

Yes. They're not copying it. They're not cut and pasting it. They're eating it. They're eating our data because the most juicy most important thing on our planet is data. Data

is their food. They're eating the data. They're eating the data. And because they're eating the data, When he goes to Facebook to listen to his wife's voicemail. Yeah. Oh, it ate the wife's final message. Oh, now it's personal.

And so this is the point where you realize like literally nothing in this movie makes sense on even like a really basic level. Like that's not how a computer works at all. Despite the fact that this entire movie is on a computer. And the plan comes in while the daughter. Luckily enough, is a prestigious biochemist. And she has discovered the cure for cancer. I swear to God. Yeah, for sure, for sure.

And the cure for cancer is a modified disease that attacks cancer cells. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. In which they go, wait a second. Yep. What if? What if? What if?

DNA is just like computer code, right? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And DNA is just like a computer code. It's the common cold, but we've made it into a digital version of the common cold. So, hold on. What if we put your cancer cells onto a USB key? Yep.

Okay. And then let the monsters eat them. Then they would all die. And you're sitting here going, like, wow, that doesn't make any sense at all. Like, that's just like complete nonsense. That's crazy enough to work. Right. But, and here.

This is my favorite part of the movie, and it's also like one of the worst scenes of anything I've ever seen in my life. So luckily enough, Ice Cube is in the building. He's in an NSA building that's connected to the government data centers. How's he going to get the cancer-killing alien virus onto the data center? Well, can't they just send him? Like, no, you can't send it? That's impossible because he's at his computer and the data center in the basement is like sealed off for security purposes, right?

Physically. Physically, right? But here's the problem. Here's the problem. The problem is he works at the NSA and ever since Snowden, you can't have a USB drive in here. Of course not. I have no way to physically transport it. Definitely not.

So which the son-in-law says, hold on. I think I have a solution. What if? What if you bought it on Amazon and we shipped it to your office? Wait, hold on. And he goes, what? How did he even get here in time? And the guy goes in the back of his truck.

They're hiding in the truck, by the way. And he pulls open a drone. And he says, Amazon Air. We've been training on this for months. It can get it to you right away. So then we cut back to Ice Cube's computer screen If this is the only part of the movie you watch Oh my God

They go through the entire purchasing process Full screen Including I swear to God including They hang on the use this address button For like a really Really long time And then he selects Amazon Air

Add to Cart by now Yeah and he asked to he has to buy it for the drone to work. So he buys it. At that point, the guy just has a USB stick. He just had one, I guess, for some reason. I don't know how that work. Loads it on to Amazon Air.

And then the climax of the movie takes place. Oh, my God. Which is just really the fountain of all American ingenuity coming together at once. So Ice Cube hacks a predator drone. that is flying above DC and was actually flying above DC before the beginning of the movie, which raises its own questions, which is why a missile-equipped predator drone would be flying over the Capitol at random. But he hacks control of that away from the government,

sends it to his son, so his son can pilot it, who, by the way, was the hacker all along. And then the drone is running interference on the tributtal. while we get a first-person camera shot of the Amazon Air drone zipping and weaving through destroyed buildings and trying to save humanity by zipping it. But the drone falls down at one point and it's flipped over and oh, don't know what we're going to do. What are we going to do?

Hey, we can use the, we can use the microphone on it to yell at a, nearby homeless man who's hiding from the aliens and scream at him, hey dude, hey dude, flip over the drone. It's really important. But he doesn't want to run into the street because it's dangerous and he could die, right? So they start to workshop, what can we say to him? What can offer him a $1,000 Amazon gift card? Oh my God, of course.

Okay, so now we're texting him. We're texting him on his phone and they send the gift card and he goes, okay. and then he runs into the street and he flips the drone and then the drone flies to the fucking data center and the rest of the movie happens and it's I

it's offensive like it's offensive to humans I was hoping that you were going to say that the drone is fine because Amazon Web Services cloud computing is still online even in the face of the apocalypse I mean it is

Amazon's like dude he purchased it and went through the website despite the fact that every alien on earth is eating our data and crashing our infrastructure. Amazon and YouTube's still up. That's pretty sick. That's pretty sick. I mean, I would hope.

There's even a part in the movie where he hacks into his son's steam account to refund a game he has purchased. Oh, hell yeah. For him. Okay. If you're living under my roof, you need to get a job and not play these video games. I mean, while shopping for the, for the drone situation, I would hope that they would hope that they would scroll down to the reviews to make sure that they're getting a decent one.

Check the stars, you know, like 4.5, 4. Okay, how we, you know. That's, that's kind of incredible. So every company, every company that has its full logo in this movie then. So, Steams is not, they cut around it. You can clearly tell its steam. Okay. It's incredibly obvious at Steam. But you don't actually see the Google, the,

the Steam logo or Valve or whatever. But everything else is very much real life company being in website and or service or app being used. That's kind of incredible. It feels like a parody of what like Jeff Bezos thinks is going on in the world and how awesome he is. Well, I mean, that is what the AI generated film up to the, that we were talking about last week. that's what you would expect really especially given it to people point out that

some of the disaster footage of the aliens attacking is actual like real footage of like missile strikes oh yeah just photoshopped the oh yeah so it's like

it's a mile on oh yeah okay I thought you see I was waiting for like stock footage you know like oh yeah this was just like well by stock footage you mean footage that Amazon just pulled off the internet.

Right. Real, real death and war actually. And yes, okay, real atrocity footage for the movie. So by technicality, you actually see people literally die in this film for real. That's fucking collapsing buildings.

Sick. Hey. That rules. That's awesome. Yeah. War of the Worlds. Ice Cube Edition. Repulsive, nonsensical. absolute mess top to bottom

about a third of it is just a straight up ad 10 on 10 page page asked me a question which was during all of the by the way the entire movie's 90 minutes there's a there's like a cohesive global response to fighting the aliens in the streets

within about eight minutes of them landing which is its own hilarious nonsense but page was like why do they keep blurring wearing all these soldiers faces. Like all the soldiers' faces in every piece of footage is blurred. Because they're real soldiers. And I'm like, oh, because it's just footage they took and they can't get the rights to their release.

Oh my God. That's insane. Wow. Damn. Well, yo, get the bag, I suppose. Fucking ice cube. More like ice cube. Right?

Yeah? Yeah. Okay. Well, he's enjoying it. you know. Hey man. Amazon delivery worker loves Amazon so much that in the screenshot they show at the end of like the baby shower

he's wearing his Amazon hat. Like to his child's baby shower. I mean yeah. Yeah. Kind of incredible. I just got it. That's pretty good. Did you?

Yeah. That's pretty good. I have people in the chat spelled out. Oh, you missed out on the part where we went from fuck the police to man wow you know Trump is yeah hey he's shaking things up pretty good he's shaking things up you know

damn that's crazy what's going on guys oh it's crazy out here I don't know about that wow so page is in the chat and says did you even mention Ava Longoria and how she was pointless I forgot Ava Longoria was in this movie which is crazy because the movie only has five characters

I mean I did Ava Longoria works for NASA and she she's the one who discovers the aliens and also she discovers that they're eating the data and she's an exposition person

she exists for exposition that's her job all right well again get the bag can't say I've known what she's been up to since I guess what John Wick she's in John Wick

apparently so that's crazy all right there's also there's also a subplot about how a guy in the government's evil because he wants to collect all of our data and it's just as nonsensical as you expect because he's going to turn on Goliath

which is the most intense data surveillance thing that's ever existed and turn on Goliath put out a beacon to the aliens that said, look, look, we got so much data. We got so much data here. And as everyone in his vicinity is like, the aliens are attacking us because you turn this machine on. And he's like, I need to do it to keep America safe. And like the planet is literally being ravaged by space aliens.

And he's just like, I did what I had to do. Like this, I would love stupid. The idea that this is a salvage of a thing that was filmed and then they're just like, what can we do with it is kind of beautiful? All we're missing is that like, you know, thing where Ice Cube is actually like, I don't support this or endorse this at all, but you signed a contract and it had to come out type thing. We're just missing that final piece, really.

Good stuff. Okay. Oh, you know what? I need to download an animated. GIF. How do I download this? I need to download a GIF and then send it to you and then tell you that it actually appears unedited, like the thing I'm sending you. Let me see if I can upload this image. There we go.

All right. So this animated GIF that I'm sending you of Ice Cube rubbing his hands and saying, courtesy of DHS, join the rebellion with a Photoshop picture of Ice Cube in a hood. That is as that appears in the film. unedited. A bunch of gifts from this film were coming out, and people were like, wow, good jokes. And then the response was like, no, this is in the movie. That's not a joke. That's not a meme.

It's actually. That's impressive. This is how it appears in the movie with no edits. I, yeah. I thought we were kind of for a while there beyond the so bad as good, you know, or at the very least in being made so bad it's good in earnest

but yeah if there's no signs here that the people making this know what they're doing and that they're not doing this on purpose then again God bless 10 on 10

love it fantastic um love the the this again memeable added with its

broad ingredients never mind the sprinkling in of uh fuck ice cube and also uh real war footage that's great

that's true yeah it's good stuff that's a fantastic package right there oh people found the gif and put it in the chat that's good that's good stuff all right

what an absolute pile of fucking shit what an embarrassing fucking mess Thank you for your service. We appreciate your time sacrifice and your report. Yeah, thank you. There's actually, like, I could go on for double that length of time.

It's just, it's infinite. Like, it's never ending. But I don't want to. You know, like, I don't want to think about it anymore. It's funny because, like, I haven't seen War of the Worlds, like, or so, like, the old Tom Cruise or even before that, but I thought. The Tom Cruise one's fine. But I really just, I'm like, oh, they remade it with,

Ice Cube, that's weird, but okay. But then all I would see is just footage of him at a computer. And I'd be like, wait, but what about the tripods and the running through the streets and the little girl and the, you know, like what about all that action shit? Where's all that footage? Like really stupid about War of the Worlds. Hmm. The Tom Cruise War of the Worlds movie exists as the point in time that I ceased being able to understand that people get older. When I was playing Death Stranding and L. Fanning was there.

I was like, oh, is that like Dakota Fanning's like older sister? And people are like, no, Pat, that's Dakota Fanning's younger sister. I'm like, what does that mean? Dakota Fanning's just like a little girl. She's like six years old. Yeah. And people are like, what? I'm like, yeah, in the War of the World's movie with Tom Cruise, she's just like a little girl.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, no, no. I know exactly. No, it's particular to media and it's particular to someone who's right at the beginning of being a teenager. I know exactly what you're describing. and this to me is the Tatyana Ali effect. This happened because I remember when Fresh Prince was on and I was like, I'm the same age as Tatiana Ali. That's cool.

And then after the show's over and you see, what is she up to now? And you're like, oh, she's like a billion years older than me actually. And like she's a way, she's been an adult forever. And TV just fucks up your perception of that. And also like the Stranger Things kids. kids and like that first season, you know, bit where you're like, oh, yeah, they're like whatever, 12 or something. And then they do the puberty thing and then, you know, double in height. And you're like, how did that happen in four years? It doesn't make any sense. Like, no, no, no.

It's your, you're specifically watching that particular time where it's the most confusing to be on video. She's just a little girl. She was right there with Tom Cruise. It doesn't help the Tom Cruise looks exactly the same. Like, that actually has. That's the confusion quite a lot. Like the only, you can, you can undo it by showing up a bunch more. Like now McCulley Culkin has shown up a bunch as an adult and everyone's like, oh yeah, it's McCulley, it's McCulligan, right?

That makes sense. There you go. It looks kind of, kind of greasy. You know, or Haley Joel Osmit, you know, and you just, you need to like have that. You need to show up more for people to go, right, okay, got it. Time has passed for you. But otherwise, it's absolutely a head fuck every time. Let's see.

what else I do? I went through and I started my series called A Link to the Pats where I played Rocket Night Adventures and Castlevania Bloodlines. Man, those games are great. They're even shorter than I remember. And that's because retroarch lets you use Rewind to avoid deaths. Which version of Castlevania Bloodlines are you playing? Are you playing the original acclaimed Chinorondo with the English subtitle, translation inserted into it for accuracy.

Can you put Josh back in your fucking mind? That was not, that was not Josh. That was the other guy standing next to him. That was the guy that Josh would complain to me about. Yes. Okay, my mistake. The spirit of him, not Josh, the dude next to him. I brought him out.

Like 25 years ago. Yes. No, 20 years. Jesus Christ. You have not yet played. Seiko no Ronde. No, that's the wrong one. Chino Rondo.

Awful. Rondo of blood, Chino Rondo. Anyway, I played the Genesis English version. The problem with Mega Man X is that when Zero says to Mega Man, in the original Japanese translation, he says, Don't Die on Me, X, otherwise known in Japanese as Shinenu Yo. And that tone is so much more different from the English.

English translation, which softens the moment and kind of says, don't give up on me or so. And really, I think it's a travesty that we don't keep the original Japanese in Mega Man X. And so that's why I've made the fan translation myself. And here, you should play the ROM. Do you remember that guy's name? Oh, yes. Don't say it. No.

You can type it if you want. Absolutely. And in fact, I've tracked you down on a forum that you barely post on to send you a giant DM about why you should play this version of Mega Man X, where he says, Don't die on me, X. So, like, whenever this, like, uh, accuracy and shit. Oh, we went to high school with his younger brother.

Okay, right, right. Now I remember the, oh, fuck. His younger brother was so much cooler than him. Oh, my God. That's crazy. Oh, I hate this. Oh, I hate this. That was like one of the worst interactions.

Like, oh, cool, I went to high school with your brother. Oh, this is the worst person I've ever talked to in my life. I have summoned the spirit into the room. But here's the thing. Whenever I hear localization discourse, like, I remember that guy that I knew, and this is the person that I picture. And I have met,

I have encountered no scenarios in which I have been disillusioned that that is, in fact, the avatar of who I'm speaking to. Like, I've never encountered anything to make me second guess that that type of person is the person I'm talking to. Because it's just an endless stream of actually...

Well, because the problem for me is that the next time I'm playing... So when I play Mega Man X and then I get to that line where Zero talks to X at the beginning of the intro and I go, fuck. You've actually... You've actually damaged it for me.

That's crazy. God damn. Every time, you know, da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da- he says, it pops up and he says the line and I go, God fucking damn it. Oh, dude, that guy sucks so bad. That's crazy. Thank you, thank you for like re-engineering from scraps, like a terrible set of memories in my mind. Thank you.

Anyway, anyway. No, man, I just played the English Genesis version of Castlevania Bloodlines. Cool, cool, cool, cool, cool. Those games are like 55 minutes long. they're like and you go well how the

and they remember they cost like $80 in like 1993 so that shit was crazy that the dollars per minute shit was awful

unless you were an eight year old and you had to beat California bloodlines yeah yeah beat Castlevania bloodlines legit

that could have taken me like four or five streams. So, like, that shit is mean as fuck. Yeah, these games are fucking eight minutes long, but childhood me is running through Dr. Wiley stage trying to jump off of the disappearing blocks to shoot that dragon in the face for the next five months. So actually, it's fine.

You know? Those games are awesome. They're fucking great. Of note, for Rocket Night Adventures, it's been a while, like a long, long. while since I went back to it. It's not that the game is short. I can't believe how like how short

the levels are. Every single level in Rocket Night Adventures has a different gimmick and every single level lasts like six minutes long. Like usually in a modern game because they have to be a certain length, you'd be like well here's the platforming section

with a trick to it. Here's the first jump, which is your introduction. Here is your more complicated series of jumps, and now we're going to remix it a little bit. No, you don't even get to the remix part of it. Like, here's the gimmick, learn it, or die, next stage. You'll never use it again. It will never appear in the game ever again.

Incredible. It's so fucking cool. It's so cool. Hey, man, what's up? I would say, I got a ugly thing in my lap here. No, I feel like a high-fi rush harkened a little bit to that where like some stages just did. It did some shit where it's like, you're at, this is just for this stage. You'll never see it again.

Let's have fun. Yeah. So, yeah, no, those old games are great. This week I'm going to be continuing on with my cheating assways running through old Genesis games with Contra Hardcore Strider and Zero Wing. All games you can totally beat in an hour. Strider you could beat the fastest 13 minutes baby Used to speed run that shit

Yeah strider Strider might be the worst deal Anyone has ever made buying a video game You could have Like I remember playing Strider as a child And even with its difficulty And the regular continues

It took me like 90 minutes To actually beat it So it was it was an arcade game Right that's the deal like is yeah because you're popping quarters in um it's also extremely bullshit and strider the cart was more expensive okay strider two for the genesis not the same thing though mind you right that's totally different yeah yeah but if you're talking about that original one where you just slide and cut through the whole thing uh yeah you could 13 minute that that that that clear that shit

i look it up like strider genesis play through even like a normal run through is like 20 minutes It's crazy It's absolutely nuts That was sold for like 80-90 Canadian Yeah Yeah yeah I think I did a run back on on best friends

I think I did a run through that Showing off Some some cool shit At the same time as Or near around Alien Soldier or so But I fucking love Strider man That's a cool that's a cool ass game I love Strider

in the context that I rented Strider. If I had bought Strider, I would have hated Strider until my dying day. Yeah. Okay. Okay. Sure. And then the Strider likes like a cannon dancer. And there was another one that was like right in that vein up there.

But I'm curious. I was going to say like, what made you pick that? to go back to in particular. Osman, there we go. So the link to the pets, the link to the pets list is really simple. Every game on the first like 10 games is a game that I said, hey, we should play this for old school play-thrus on the old channel

and got shot down by everybody because they either didn't play it or weren't interested. I specifically say, hey, can we play a show? Shining Force or Rocket Night Adventures to which I got shot down so that you guys could do another Donkey Kong Country playthrough. Uh, okay.

Did I do... You did some Donkey Kong Country playthrus. I think he did two and three. I don't remember doing three. I'd have to go back in, let me see. Maybe it was one and two? I might have been one and two.

Yeah, I don't remember doing three ever. Yeah. Okay. Anyway, point being, The layout I have is like Genesis. So I'm like, there's a million super short Genesis games that you can just fly through. Okay. And that's the basic logic.

And once I fly through all of that shit, I will then be moving on to like Shining Force 2, which is my favorite game of all time. And then probably dipping into the Saturn and then weird old PC stuff. Well, it's not weird. But I think about like I have the Beholder too. which I've tried to get running and it hates being captured. It hates it. But I'll try it. I'll figure it out.

Okay. I was going to... For a second, I thought, um, are black, specifically going that side, like I don't know if Gunstar Heroes or Guardian Heroes or any of that shit would be...

So here's the weirdest thing. I owned a Genesis. I never played Gun Star Heroes. Ah, okay. Treasure stuff didn't, uh... So I should, yeah, Treasure doesn't, but I should go back to it as well. Oh, the other thing...

Because Alien Soldier is hot. shit. The other thing that was this was people asking me, hey, are you ever going to play more retro games from my audience? And I go, oh, yeah, man, what I don't know. But the most annoying factor, because I like spite,

I like it, was when I was playing, oh, I can't, I literally can't tell you this story because it will spoil something for you. Oh, okay. I was playing a game recently. and people could not understand that I had never played a series of Super Nintendo games.

Okay. Like, could not believe it. Like, genuinely, like, we're like, you what? And I'm like, I didn't own a Super Nintendo. And I didn't go back to these games when I got to emulating because they didn't appeal to me. and just like this nonstop, like, I can't believe you didn't play these. Okay. To which I then responded by listing like 25 Genesis and Saturn games to which literally everyone in my audience went, what's that?

Oh, okay. Okay. I so, I, oh, you motherfuckers. So, pieces of shit. As I grew up a Nintendo kid, when it came to Genesis stuff in particular or Sega stuff, that was all after the fact post-emulation, I went back and basically did homework, you know. So like there are some Super Nintendo games

that I did homework on, and then there's a bunch of them that I didn't because they just didn't appeal to me or whatever. And I didn't. So I had a friend that we would trade our Genesis and our Super Nintendo back and forth, and he just never had the games that people expected me to have played.

All right, let's start at the beginning of the list. Three by Three Eyes. And then just whatever, that same SNS emulator list, ROM list every time. Always starting with three by three eyes. So I'm very happy with that. Of something else I'm very happy with, which I was surprised about,

is I dip my toes into the Battlefield 6 open beta over the weekend. And how is that? So were you allowed to play? I was allowed to play. to play. Okay. Uh, in order to play on my personal computer, I had to go into my bios and turn on secure boot. Okay.

Did you uninstall the, your Valorit launcher? I don't have that shit. Okay. What about 2XCO? I don't have that shit on this computer either. Okay. All right. All right.

Just check. Um, and that was an annoying detail, but did work like, like, without issue. Um, um. So for background, so I put the vods up, right, of me playing Battlefield. And I got the strangest comment. And it really shows like the level of context that timing can make. So someone was like, I can't believe Pat's playing like a modern military shooter. That's crazy.

This seems like the kind of person he would make fun of back in the old best friend's days. And I was like, yeah, since I started to stream and like the second half of the old channel, like we never really covered Call of Duty on like the old channel, right? Right? Yeah, I did one on, I did a Call of Duty Infinite Warfare LPL. Yeah, but that was like a, that was like a strange thing, right? That was like, oh, that's outside your wheelhouse. And it's like, oh, yeah. So the time that I've been doing all of this just doesn't overlap with the part where I used to play Call of Duty and Day of Defeat and Counterstrike and Battlefield all the time.

like all the time because after Battlefield 4 the people who worked at Dice and EA sat up and they said I want to do something brave I want to take this

incredible multiplayer shooter franchise and just completely run it into the dirt by releasing a shitload of bad games over and over and make it terrible Oh yeah yes So the Just make it dog shit

you know what I'm not even going to ask never mind I'm no ask ask don't do that shit I hate that shit suffice to say I haven't played Battlefield game so I don't know anything right sure yeah whatever so it's it's basically like well because well battlefront Star Wars is

kind of doing that it's battle that's somewhat similar Star Wars team right but the whole the whole deal is like unlike Call of Duty where you are just running and gunning you are 6 v6 in this case Battlefield is about the fact that you can jump into tons of vehicles to fight. Yeah, it's 32. The scale is the big deal. It's 32 versus 32 or like 50 versus 50 depending.

Okay. So the actual FPS aspect of it is not as good, but is also not as important because you're doing vehicle play. That is not the case. Okay. Traditionally, the FPS aspect has just been slower because you're accounting for enormous scale. Like, you don't typically run as fast, you're not as mobile, et cetera, because it's not about you versus six guys on the other team. It's about your squad of four versus other squads of four. Like the core unit in battlefield is your four-man squad. It's not you.

Right. Okay. Cool. And Bad Company, too, was the best that series ever got by, and everybody who played. bad company too will probably say so in the chat. It's literally the best it ever was. And it's been like very, very poorly chasing that for a long time. But there's an open beta.

So fuck it, I'll jump on. Wow, I had a really, really excellent time with the open beta. I had an excellent time. It feels good. the changes to the mechanics feel great. It plays excellently with a controller on PC against people with mouse and keyboard. Wow. Okay. Though I will give a shout out to the YouTube content creator Tactical Brit,

who put a very detailed guide about what settings and sensitivities and fields of you to use. Yeah, I was going to say, is there an aggressive auto? way more like um i wouldn't call it aggressive i think the i think the difference is is that in battlefield um it's your attention like in battlefield it's it's your attention is the resource that is at a premium because when you walk into a room there could be like literally four to 20 guys in the room there's a lot has the same so in battlefield you get a lot more um kills on guy who it just doesn't happen to be looking at you right this second.

Has the same studio been making Battlefield forever? Yep, it's always been Dice. Yep, okay. But, so the, basically the game feel is good. The maps are a little too small, but otherwise it feels really solid, which is not something I could say about the recent ones,

the one I took a look at them. They have introduced, so I haven't played in a while, so I don't know if these are new, but like everyone can revive any one. one after being shot. But the difference between medics and normal characters is the defib pads just you shoot somebody with the defibrillator and they pop right back up.

But everybody else has to grab someone and drag them a certain distance before they can revive them. Like stuff like that. Are you solo queuing and playing against people with proxy chat? So I was, I solo queued and I played from people with chat. But I, uh, but I, uh, but I, uh, but I, never turned on the microphone. It has a really excellent ping system.

And it has a really excellent map system. The actual chat just doesn't really, like I did not miss it. Okay. But the usual horrors that you are... First thing I did was turn off chat. Okay. The voice chat.

First thing I did right away. And that was enough? Yeah. Okay. Pinging and map awareness. works really well. But it's got like a bunch of cute little shooter features that I really appreciate.

One of the things that's always been miserable in Battlefield is that people who pick sniper classes just pick a push up on some shitty fucking spot on the map. And all they want to do is snip people. And they will snip three, four guys

in a match and then get killed by a counter-sniper. And then climb right back up to their spot and do the same thing. thing and have absolutely no impact on the match whatsoever, which is the worst. So in order to mitigate that, they have two features. One is, if you're looking down your scope, the higher magnification in your scope, the more bright the shine off your scope is to everyone else within a mile. Cool.

Like if you're looking down the scope and anyone's like looking in your general direction, they will see a blindingly bright. Like there's a fucking sniper over there. It's twinkling in everyone's direction. Cool. But anyone a sniper sees through their scope gets pinged on the map. Just by looking at them at all. Oh, for the rest of the team.

Yeah. So the actual recon part of recon is like mandatory. You can't get away from it. If you're sniping, even if you're not shooting anyone by looking. You're being helpful. Yeah. That's cool. That's cool. What else?

I had a really positive... Sorry, after you. Oh, no, I just... I'm just going back through the years of Battlefield news in my brain of just like, when does it ever come up? And one of those things... Once every two years. And something that comes up with it, I feel, has been like, oh, they've announced the microtransactions and their dog shit awful, horrible, exploitive bullshit.

is this a case where there's no word on what that's going to be because it's in beta? The only word about it is that they have said that they don't want to end up looking like what Call of Duty looks like now. I don't know if you've seen what Call of Duty shit looks like now. Call of Duty is like a bunch of mascots and Bulldogs and Nicky Minaj running around in your Call of Duty lobby. They wanted to be Fortnite. and now Call of Duty looks like clown shit.

I saw a pretty accurate Gundam shit happening that looked pretty cool though, so I don't know. Somebody described Call of Duty now looks like Fortnite for dads. Yeah, okay. They have said that Battlefield is not going to be doing that

that cosmetics and whatnot will look setting appropriate. But if they put the thing I like in it, then everything is forgiven. Yeah. The other thing that I found out. And it's weird because I double check this just to be sure. But I went and took a look at one of my YouTube comments when I put like a beta footage up,

which was describing the reason why it feels good. And the reason why it feels good is that, and I can't remember his name, the lead designer on Battlefield 4, quit. David Surland. Here it is. He left Dice after the shitstorm of Battlefield 5 came back. And he had his terms for coming back where he wanted complete control over all gameplay decisions. And he wanted alpha testing and open beta testing. And Vince Sampella is also working on this game. which he was not prior to either to older battlefield games. Vince Zampella of Titanfall and old Call of Duty shit. Ah, okay.

So a bunch of people who, at least two people in key decision-making positions, came back to be like, no, we should make it good. From respawn back to dice, okay. Well, no, I think, I think Finnsampella is like, head of multiplayer at EA now. Ah, okay, moving upward. But, like directly overseeing it.

Maybe some mirrors edge people? I don't know. I think dice is just dice. It's been a long time. I think they're pretty much always working on battlefield. Okay. Cool. Cool.

So I had an absolutely fantastic time and I'm actually like, like hesitantly hopeful for the full release. I would love. I would fucking love to play a battlefield game regularly and be like, yes, I am playing battlefield.

I'm enjoying battlefield. Because that is some of the most fun I've ever had in my life. Like, Battlefield, when it works, is the fucking peak of shoot. I love that shit. What time period is it? This one's modern. They go all over the place, but this one happens to be modern. But there's two things.

One is that, Man, I really hope they don't just kill its ass with micro-transaction nonsense, which who knows? Because I can ignore a lot. But the second of which is that this has been a complaint in every single beta for Battlefield they have ever done in the history of the franchise. And it is the maps aren't big enough because they didn't include the really big maps in the beta. So like in the in the beta you could get a game of 64 players, right? 32 on 32, right? No, no, no, no.

I don't want that. That's not that's not the mode I'm going to play. That's not the mode most people are going to play. Maybe I'll play rush or breakthrough for funzies, but I want my 128 person conquest map. I want my gigantic motherfucking map that takes me three and a half to five minutes to drive to the objective. only to get killed instantly by an RPG.

Right, okay, okay. I can see a beta wanting to have more matches played out for more data and therefore forcing the faster. They're not doing 128 for BF6. All right, well, time to Google something and remove the AI results. I just recall battlefront microtransaction

like Hal being the peak of the most exploitive and bullshit micro-transaction pricing in the industry. So all that Darth Vader, whatever shit, and then pulling it back so that it's still bad, but not as bad to make people stop complaining and yad-da. Here's the trick, and this is kind of like endemic to the modern military shooter, which is for a lot of players like me,

modern military aesthetics do nothing. So I don't I'm good with the defaults forever, man. Like I don't give a shit. Right. And that's what Call of Duty ran into, which is now why you're running around with a bunch of furries and celebrities. Where it's like, well, we got to do something. Well, I'll take furries and celebrities over the black guy who clearly couldn't have existed as a real soldier on the cover,

even though it's from a real... That'd be fair. A lot of the celebrities in Call of Duty are black people. Like a lot. Like a lot. And it's not the one where it's just like, oh, you mean this guy on the cover that's from this real platoon that really served that actually hears a photo of them, actually? That is, no? Also, the danger of furries is that you don't know if they're black. And I shouldn't have said danger.

That was the wrong word to use. Mm. Mm. Mm. Mm. The work, no. All right. Undue.

No. All right. Let's try again. I'm just going to give up on this whole train of thought. Yep. That's all right. We can abandon ship. That's cool.

Reset. all right hey what's up but yeah no I really enjoyed Battlefield 6 and now I get to enjoy the so almost every battlefield has some kind of beta and now I get to enjoy the two

month long wait of I hope they don't fuck up the really good time I had in the beta please don't write that down if I didn't write that write down anything man you need to you need to relax I read

really hope they don't fuck up the good time I had in the beta. Yeah. Because that's the worst. Like, oh, wow, that was so good. I can't wait for the final. Oh, it sucks. Oh, it's ruined. I regret to inform you, Pat.

You might not have realized this, but you are playing an EA shooter product. And you are enjoying yourself. There's only... Oh, well, that's fine. I used to play a lot of EA shooter products and enjoy myself. So here's the thing... just having expectations. Modern military shooter

slash first person multiplayer shooter went the way of the sports game. Like they were really good and arcadey and awesome. And then they got so popular that they became the primary product and realized that people would buy them every year. And they just became sports games. And it happened in like the

odds. And people were like, that plays Call of Duty? Like I used to play every single call of duty on day one obsessively until Black Ops 2 came out and went Ah, this isn't as good as Black Ops 1. Well, yeah, because what company, more than electronic arts would understand, hey, we can turn things that are not sports games into sports games, you know, in terms of

release scheduling. And like, they clearly, that fucking daw. The annualization in all of them. this is that's that's a anyway all this to say that getting your hopes up or your expectations into any sort of

place where you know you're going to have a little bit of hope is wild but also of very important note is not just that I had a good time playing battlefield and it was like oh that was a good

experience of note and is I'm going to say dramatically altering my perspective of what happened is that I started off, played it, I think I streamed it three times, two, twice? I can't remember. I streamed it a couple of times. And I started off just getting absolutely, completely smoked. And going, well, I'm almost 40,

haven't played a battlefield game in a couple of years. What are you going to do? Oh, that was a fun little thing. Oh, I got them. Oh, I got one, right? and by the end of the beta period was fucking grandpaing out or whatever I don't know what the kids call it

but was like finishing my matches but like a KD of like six or seven and just having like runs of just like absolutely slaughtering everybody and doing really really really really well and being like

ha ha the game is good because I'm winning I'm winning really good and I'm feeling really good cool and I'm oh that means the game is really good yeah okay there we go this is the most important part of the segment actually is the the results that made that made it fun yeah well no i was having fun before but i was having way more fun once i was doing really well because games are good when you're good at them they didn't they didn't they didn't serve good when you're good at them there's there's no uh uh server matching based on the uh skill base no there is but the the the

The nature of the beast with Battlefield is that on a map with 30 other players instead of five, the range of player skill on both teams has to vary to a very specific degree. Yes, for every five god killer like e-sports Unstoppable, there are five infants barely holding the mouse. Yeah. Yeah. And yeah, so the game, so I did really well and had a bunch of good runs. so the game is really good. Understood.

Which brings me to a follow-up thing, which is not something I played this week, but it is a piece of advice I would like to ask of you because you are the person to know. So I really like Street Fighter Six a lot. I think Street Fighter Six is great. And Sagat recently came out, and I would like to mess around with Sagat,

and I'm going to be streaming, messing around with Sagat later in the week. But I also love M. Bison. Good game. However, I, I got M. Bison to Master Rank, which means my M. Bison is now trapped in Master Rank forever. You will never rank down to underneath Master Rank.

The problem is that I don't remember anything about playing M. Bison in Street Fighter 6 because I haven't played the game in like four months. I don't remember anything. Like nothing. His crouching medium punch is good, but I don't remember any of the combos. I don't remember the throw loops. Like nothing.

It's gone. Some of that will pick back up when I go and play it. But also the game has been patched twice since I played. So even the things, if I do remember and they come back, they'll be wrong. So I'm in this strange place where I feel like, If I go back to Street Fighter 6 and play the character online that I want to play, I will just immediately die. Mm-hmm.

And I don't exactly know what to do about that. Other than die for a while. Yeah, if you're okay with dying for a while, then you can die for a while. The other thing is if you start a different character, but you already have one in Master, the minimum rank you can get is Diamond 1. Oh, I thought it was Platt. I think it's Diamond 1.

Oh, is it Diamond? Ooh. So you, with your Sagat, even if you failed all your placements, might still find yourself landing in Diamond 1 and then having to correct out of Diamond or further, depending on how it's going. Because the idea being, if you have a master in any character, than you are at least this proficient.

Therefore, let's, you know, keep you amongst where you could potentially bring other characters. That's rough, because Diamond 1 is like all right. Yeah, people that start to know what they're doing are definitely hitting it up and playing in there. But to not, but here's the thing. The other side of that is having a bunch of people who have master characters starting out

amongst people that are much lower, completely making the experience not fun for them. I have a question. And this is not cope. Or I hope it's not. But as time goes on, is the average rank of each player increasing?

Because I remember when Street Fighter 6 first came out, I had to crawl my ass to get into Diamond. Like, I had to fight my fucking shit off to get into Diamond. So when a new character drops,

there's a huge push where a bunch of people that are not as good are now on the field. and you can therefore climb easier initially, as long as you're in that sort of beginning period where everyone's checking it out for a bit. Over time, as those people filter out,

people that are good tend to be the ones left that you have to climb through and it gets a bit harder. But also, people tend to make it to master and then just stop because it's an end point to the race, right? For some people, it's like a beginning to like, hey, the actual ranked I want to play starts at Master. I kind of felt that way. When I got to Master with Bison and I was fighting over 1,300 to 1600,

I was like, it's a lot less satisfying than getting Diamond 4. But that is by design, right? Because ranked for, ranked is two different things for different people. And like there's a part of how of designing the game to satisfy people that are aiming for a true skill number versus satisfying people that are looking to progress is to give them an exit ramp and achieve. Master is a stopping point for the vast majority of people with their characters.

So, yeah, to answer your question, the best time to feel yourself, you know, getting up more, to get a higher win ratio is early on when the character drops, especially, you know, if, yeah, especially when people are like, you know, messing around and like try to learn how to use them, etc. And then stopping at Master is where a lot of people end up just not touching the character again, you know. If you are not looking for the sweaty, you know, like MR battle, if you're not looking to, you know, take the true, take the true number from Master into your, you're online and then having to deal with a bunch of losses and all that, you're whatever, then you're okay to just play to master and stop.

There's nothing wrong with that. My problem is that I played to master and then stopped, and then the game's got a couple patches since then. So I feel like if I go back to my master bison, he will actually be, he will assuredly be way weaker. Yeah. Because I'm playing him, not because the character is weaker, than I was when I got there.

So two other things, I guess, that are pretty solid. But I mean, there's, okay, one thing that I know I like and such is checking out a replay to see what's going on with the character. If I haven't been there in a while, I'll just go watch like, hey, what's somebody in my relative range doing just to see like what's going on, especially if it's been a version or so. But a lot of people are using the battle hub and having fun just jumping on a cabinet. And it's been my experience that after a certain point, people in the battle hub became unkillable freak beasts. So it depends on where you are and who you're matching with, and it'll tell you if the person is within your relative skill range or not, right? Like, if you match up with people who it says,

this person's way above your skill range, then you'll find that, yeah, there'll be beasts that are streaking. But I've seen people generally talking about online about how jumping into the battle hub and getting casual games is a pretty fun way to play that feels less sweaty, but still tense. Um, random casual, you, it's a mixed bag. You never know what you're going to get. Sometimes you get, again, super sweat.

Sometimes you get people clowning around. Sometimes you get people trying to lab things out or whatever. But just to jump on, have some sets, play almost like going to the arcade. Battle Hub seems to be where a lot of people are having the highest quality games with people that are within their relative skill range. And it's a good place to like, warm up and then be like, okay, cool, I feel confident. Let me switch on the ranked mode so that I can play while in the battle hub. and then every once in a while it'll be like, hey, do you want to try a ranked match?

And then you can crack that out, you know? There's one other thing, which is like, hey, I would like to go back to Jamie, right? Jamie's had a couple convenience buffs over time, but I just really like Jamie. I'd like to play Jamie. So here's where it's weird. Every guy I can find for Jamie is really fucking old.

Right? It's like he's a release day character, so they're quite aged. So then I go into like, okay well what's good for Jamie and then I have to hit the point where like all right now that I've watched this video and try to integrate it I now have

to go through the fucking set of patches that changed his stuff because all the shit in the guide is outdated yeah yeah so um there the

it sucks that things have become decentralized the way they are and people are basically often their own character specific discords I hate it It sucks that you have to find the right content Somebody just linked me the solution of my problem FighterCenter.net Okay

There's a website Let's see over here Okay well that was easy Okay cool there you go That's some information What I was going to say is that like you know Something like beyond finding a particular Beyond finding a particular content creator

Or something and having to find them or whatever the what I usually do um these days is hashtag SF6 underscore Jamie and it's like I think I think that might be the least effective way for me to personally learn anything in my entire life like I don't blame me when I want to learn something I want to read it on a piece of paper yeah and it I don't know it depends on whether the character had somebody or whether the community resource exists for for that type of thing. You know, back in the day, there used to be SRK. There used to be universal places that were, that all that information came together.

And some games still have those, you know, for Guilty Gear. You've got Dust Loop, you know. Street Fighter, yeah, there's definitely resources like this, but the fact that you want to check versioning as well and stuff like that, like a lot of that does come down to like finding a video that says. like, hey, SF6, Jamie changes latest season, you know, or something to that effect. Something else, too, you might, that's kind of

interesting if you haven't checked it out, is the SimCim stuff in the battle hub, where you can basically go and fight against, like, the trained CPU that behaves like players. Okay. So, like, you pick a character, and then after fighting a certain amount of, you know, casual or ranked or whatever matches, and it, like, it updates or whatever, there's a

data, you can go fight against the Jamie that plays like people do at different ranks, so at Diamond or at Platinum or whatever. And like, it's another way to play online in a less stressful way while simulating, you know, characters and people and humans that are actually doing wake up shit on you, pressure, Oki, tech, and doing a lot of stuff that human beings do, you know. So I find just getting a feel for a new character way in low pressure as well, the Simpsom stuff is pretty good for that. And in a specific place where it's like getting

a feel for a new character. Nah. I just mean like, I'm in this place or I'm like is right now today is Jamie's standing medium punch good or bad? Like I will have to dig into the fucking tomes

to find out the answer. I mean, and that's where I'm like I'm going to go check out an MC Murrah video or a Vesper arcade you know and just go like oh vesper put up a video on the latest changes to jamie what what's what's what's going on with that they're looking at the data what's broski saying what's not you know all these different yeah but it just that's that's the content creator way of getting the information

um i didn't know about um fighter center dot net that looks pretty cool so it looks like a list of tech um pretty solid and in general too what i will say is that um if you the The thing about the content creator stuff, though, is that, like, if there is a person in particular that is, like, you know, grinding it out with the character that you're playing, watching, like, a stream with them going through stuff and fighting matches, labbing, learning, et cetera, is like, it's pretty, it's, it's a fun. I enjoy that. I find it's fun to kind of see, like, oh, shit, you kind of learn together with the group, you know, when Big Bird was doing Marissa stuff, you know, you kind of, everyone's kind of collectively discussing and watching and labbing and playing. And there's a, there's a classroom environment to that. You know, Zaffarino has a big classroom environment to his streams as well. So it's, it's a different aspect of, from what you're specifically talking about. Because this is like hands off the controller, you know, elements. But if you're, if it is, it is, I find it kind of fun to, you know, to dive into that stuff sometimes, too.

Are you telling me that in the two hours at night that I get to myself, after everyone's that I should spend that entire time watching a content creator explain to me how I should play a character and not actually get any matches in. Is that what you're telling to me? No.

Soon to be new dad? No, no. I think you should pop the game on, grab Sagat, go fight in the battle hub and see what happens. But also, you can fight ranked and care less about the results.

Well, that's obviously the ideal. But like, I had a, I had a, like, a catacly, like, when I stopped playing Master, it's like, I got to Master, woo. Yeah. And, like, I won, like, a massive streak in the end of Diamond to get it to Master. Like, I was on it, right? Mm-hmm. And then as soon as I got in a Master, I got, like, a cataclysmic losing streak. Mm-hmm.

Like, as soon as I got in, which I assume is my placement within Master. And it's just like, man, I don't mind a loss. but getting like 40 losses in a row is like insanely discouraging. And one other element to this too, what time did you love, did you jump online? Oh, well, when I was doing that, the child was very young, so it was any given time of day. Okay. Nowadays, it would be midnight Pacific. Okay.

So 3 a.m. Eastern. Yeah, guess what? That's primetime beast hours. Yeah, that's freak hours, yeah. 3 a.m. Eastern is you are jumping online in freak hours. You're getting freak beasts nonstop. That's a part of the problem there too. Like, unfortunately. That's what I had with FF14 when I went back a couple of weeks.

Yeah. I was like, I want to run the raid at 1 a.m. Eastern time. No one's awake. And the only people that are awake are freaks and they do their stuff Tuesday at reset. You can enjoy your best win rate and you're therefore the most fun by playing Friday night at 10.30 p.m. You know, maybe even 9 p.m. And if you are playing Wednesday at fucking 3 a.m. Eastern, it is sick of hours only. Sorry. Oh, no.

Well, I'm going to be playing some Sagat this week, so I guess I'll find out. I've been talking to some friends and folks and catching word on the street. Seems like he can do some pretty scary stuff that's pretty nuts, but also walk speed is pretty slow and not that bad. So there's some argument as to whether or not he's really a big deal and scary or whether or not he's not that bad, which is exactly what you want. So I will tell you, I have a very specific reason, like a wildly specific reason that I would like to try out Sagat. I'm not the world's biggest Sagat fan. I don't think there's even been a single Street Fighter game in which I even had him on my roster. That's crazy.

I love Sagitt. Well, everybody knows you love Scott. He's cool. However, on my blue sky, I have one of my oomfis that just went on a tirade. that just went on a tirade one day, which ended with, I refused to believe the Sagat players are even human.

Yep. Yep. And I saw that and went, this really, really, really makes me want to play Sagat really bad because I want to be the subhuman garbage

that people complain about online. Yeah, you never mess around with Ken, right? No. So you didn't get to enjoy what it's like to do that Jinn Rai kick to people. It looks fun. Yeah.

It's just not my thing. Hey, hold this. What comes next? Oh, let's see what happens. So yeah, you can do that with Sagat. You can, you can. Also, it's just really funny to see somebody like getting super mad about Sagat and just posting pictures of a tiger at them. You can.

I just think that that just tickles me in my heart. You can extract some, some premium salt with with some of the shit he can do for sure. So that's it for, uh, for, for, for, for, for my week. If you want to go down to twitch.tv slash pat stares at it's a big week. Gamescom is this week. Gamescom is tomorrow. It is tomorrow. Skong might be there. It's confirmed to be there. No, but I mean during the show like during the, you know. Oh, not just the not just the standees and the. Who gives a fuck about that? I'm not there. I'm talking about during the show. Which is it going to be at, uh, was that? I'm going to start at 10 a.m.

Pacific tomorrow. Page is going to be joining me because. Uh, the fallout gang is going to have season two news. Um, Paige saw a screenshot on the TV in the living room this morning of Lucy in the ghoul standing in the desert. Yep. And she like ran across the room knocking over many of the baby's toys to get as close to the television as possible and just like kind of smell the screen. I got to be honest.

Um, I mean, either that or she surfed across the ground one way or the other. So Page is going to be there with me We'll see if Paige's anti-silk song curse continues All right And I think Kirby Air Ride Direct confirmed as well I'm not doing that I'm not doing it fuck you

Fuck, fuck Nintendo I don't get a shit Fuck them On the same day you pieces of shit Fortunately Whatever gets announced Will exist after it's announced and can see what's going on. But that's not even true.

You don't even know that. Looking forward to some cool shit on that. That game's cool. And Sakurai makes good video games because he sacrifices his own health to make them. Yeah, that's correct. So I also got future game shows the next day. So I expect that to be abjectly miserable. And then the rest of the week is mainly some Genesis games.

and continuing with Xenoblake Chronicles, which apparently I've almost beaten already, which is bananas. I'm going to end up beating the game in like less than half the time it took me to get a third of the way through the game trying to beat all the side quests, which really just,

I think I'm going to end up beating it like six at like six or seven times the speed. How many games of the past can now be, can this be now applied? too. A lot. Yeah. A lot. Yeah. Or even like a, just like, I guess a non-sicco path through the game for non-siccos instead of my sicko mode. Well, correcting the timeline. So be it. Also, you know what's really fun when you're playing a longer-ish game and you are getting every single person in the world

telling you that there is a different amount of game left. I have had people tell me I am two to seven streams away from the end of the game. Look, there are folks that if there are names you trust that you can rely on for that, then go with that. Anytime people throw things out there, they're always full of shit,

they're always misremembering, they're always hyper-focusing on the cool part that they remember and ignoring everything else that was not as important to them. I tend to be more likely to respond to the sicko that keeps annoyingly spamming, like, developer details during the stream and is like, did you know this? I'm like, how could I have possibly known that? There's no way I could have known this. But, okay, thank you. it's it is insane how every single game I've played for the last five years has had somebody completely incorrect guessing on how many streams were left every single game do you know um what the worst what what the least believable person in the world is when it's 11 p.m. at night and you're streaming and you're like guys I really should call the night I'm very tired and someone says dude yeah You're going to fuck the boss in like 20 minutes.

I have blown up. I have blown up on those people. That is the biggest liar that's ever existed. I have blown up on those people. And there has been, okay, Reggie and I have had like off camera probably like five where we come in,

do the final session. And we're like, damn. And then we go, imagine if we tried to do all of that at the end of yesterday. And just go, what the fuck?

Dude, there's only like an hour left of the game. There's only like an hour. We have gotten so mad at people being like, no, you're right there. You're right there. And then it was literally an entire next session, you know? Never mind the fact that I like to talk about

what just happened and summarize the thoughts. Yeah, you're a gabber. You're a chatty-cathy. You know, yapping even. It's so wild. Selective-ass memory. Somebody in the chat points out.

You can totally. finish it tonight if you put in another eight hours. If you mash through all texts, run to all the objectives, and stop giving a fuck about the content. You know, sure. So here's what I think is actually happening. It's a combination of people's bad memories, but people also go to YouTube and they type in like gears of war full play through, right? And then they click on the very first link. that's like the full game and they go wow the game's only four and a half hours long

okay so let me skim to the part they're at oh they're uh okay they're at the emulsion okay there's only 90 minutes left in the game i'm just gonna tell them there's 90 minutes left see and like i was able to calculate reggie's exact pace on act one of expedition 33 down to the day session yeah you calculated it pretty exactly we got there right at the end of the session. I'm like, I know how to do this. I remember when I watched, I watched you play Disco Elysium, the director's cut, and I watched your first episode,

and then I went over to Page, and I put down the week that you were going to beat the game, which was like five months later. And she's like, that's stupid. And like, sure enough, I was like four days off. Sure. I'm like, yeah, no, if you know someone relatively well, and you know the pace and you actually know what's in the game, yeah, you can totally ballpark it. You know,

not accounting for lost weeks or whatever. Oh, yeah, there was, you know, the power outage or whatever the fuck. Cool,

cool. All right. I can go for a piss. All right. Big piss. Yeah. Burb. B-R-B.

Oh, I thought you meant like burp out your piss. Burb. Like, that's not where it is. BRB. Yeah, okay. Now, that's much safer.

Isn't that a homestuck? Drinking piss? I feel like the word burb has something to do with homestuck, but I don't know why. All right. We're like talking right. Yeah, all right. All right. Fuck this.

All right, quick word from our sponsors. This week, the podcast is sponsored by ORAFrames. And I love or a frame. They're great, man. Legit had some in-laws passing through that came to visit and remarked on how much they

super loved the aura frames that they got and as well just checking out ours and sending pictures back and forth. You know, and like even you know, recently where I'm kind of looking at like, oh yeah, like taking more pictures in life.

is something that I need to start doing because I'm not somebody that thinks to like pull my phone out and be like, oh, let me capture this moment candidly. It took me a little bit to actually get into that like mindset. Yeah. And like the other day,

I was with the boy at the park and he was on his like one of his rocking horses. And I'm like, hey man, what do you say on the horse seat? And he went, we. And I'm like, stop, send to dad go. Mm-hmm. That instinct is not, it's, I had, we had a friend that would be the photographer of the group, you know, sometimes, but everybody did. Everybody had that friend. But when you're not that person yourself, you have to like actively think to do it, you know? So, yeah, in anticipation, of course, of taking more photos in the near future, I'm like, okay, yeah, got to be that, got to be that, that, that, that, that, in that mindset. And, um, these, honestly, these aura frames are, they're legitly awesome for. as a reminder for all that. It is your ideal gift for, you know, again, anyone that just wants to be able to look at cool pictures

of any memories you've had as it's set up in the living room. My mom has hers in the kitchen and stuff. Best Digital Photo Frame awarded by Wirecutter. And yeah, you've got unlimited storage. You can add as many photos and videos as you can find. It's simple to set up. You just plug in and share away. The features in particular that I super appreciate is like, at first I was kind of like, okay, but is this going to be like a tablet that's on at all times in a room? And it's like, no, because one, has a brightness setting that is dynamic to the lighting in the room. When things are dark, when the lights are off, it turns off. So it's responsive to like light as well and everything.

It's not glowing. It's not aggressively bright. very much passive and just kind of cycles through memories. Now when you take photos as well that have like the little clip of video in them as well, you get a little bit of movement. So some of those photos plus the sound and area, you kind of get to see like the second before and after the photo was taken, which, yeah, when that plays on the memory as well, that's pretty dope.

And if something pops up that you like, you can just double tap it and put a little heart. And then the person who uploaded it gets a little notification saying like, hey, someone liked your photo. It's really, really cool. I absolutely love it. And it's a fantastic gift. And, you know, it's on the list of things that I'm, we're planning to have things that, you know, are feel good in the room when the time comes.

Good vibes only. Yes. So with my wife who's, you know, going to be, going to be quite busy. the family way. Having one of these around for like good vibes and good memories is it's on the list as one of those things that'll be with us. So legit, legit, I really like it. Start reliving your favorite memories by visitingoraframes.com for a limited time

listeners can get $35 off the best selling Carver Matt Frame. That's A-U-R-A-Frames.com promo code Super Beast. support the show by mentioning us at checkout. Terms and conditions apply. So, yeah, I think that's super sick. I'm going to be using mine for a long time. Thank you, ORA. Thanks, ORA, Frames.

This week, podcast is sponsored by HelloFresh. Coming in the clutch, as I am anticipating a need for quick, good tasting, delicious meals that I don't need to spend a ton of time preparing. We're stocking up. We're stocking up. And yeah, HelloFresh has the ability to get you those chef-crafted recipes with fresh ingredients straight to your home. And this summer, they've got a massive menu upgrade. So more than just the Hello Fresh you remember, they've doubled their menu.

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So get in there. America's number one choice for home cooking. Thank you, Hello Fresh. Thanks, Hello, Fresh. All right. This week, the podcast is sponsored by Chubbies. And, you know, with a name... It's not just hosted.

No, not just hosted by Chubbies, but sponsored as well. And super fun. Love, love the comfort shirts that they got going on over here. I have that kind of green blue pink shirt that I was rocking with the button up polo. That thing in particular, I've been... So not only is it comfortable, but I have been getting compliments when I've been wearing it legitimately. And I'm like, oh, that's cool. Because, you know that thing where like you remember every compliment over the last 30 years?

Because they're far and few in between. So you burn them into your brain when they happen. And legitimately, I was like, hey, I started wearing some chubby shirts and some people were like, hey, that looks pretty good. And I was like, well, thank you. So, yeah, I'm getting a couple more because they're great. I was just rocking some of the swim shorts yesterday as well, actually, which again, same kind of fun patterns. And, you know, I like when something fits loose and is not too tight and constricting and has that. that good kind of, you know, breezy feel to it, but it's still flattering and, you know,

not accentuating parts that I don't want to accentuate because we're out here, man. It's, it's, there's some folds, you know, and, and, and, yes, black as an optical illusion that flatters is nice, but as a result, you don't get to have as much fun with, like, colors and, and patterns if you just kind of keep it straight black all the time or black t-shirt and just kind of be like, yeah, one thing and that's it, you know? So the fact that Chubby says these cool patterns and then like it still, again, looks pretty good while being bright and colorful and having these cool textures is something I appreciate. So, yeah, you can, excuse me, I kind of lost my list there. You can check out your new wardrobe. Get $10 off at Chubbies with the code Superbeast.

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Um, yeah, let me, let me, uh, just emphasize there verbatim, uh, whether you're suiting up for cannonballs, cookouts or casual Fridays, Chubbies has you covered. For a limited time, Chubbies is given our listeners, $10 off your order with the code Superbeast at chubbies shorts.com. That's code superbeast at chubby shorts.com. Support the show. Let them know we sent you. Give summer one last hurrah.

Keep the good vibes going with Chubbies. Thank you, Chubbies. Thanks, Chobbies. It's very dad pod. Mm-hmm. Oriented. Right on time. Right. Yeah, I've been preparing this for a while. That was my plan.

And this week, the podcast is sponsored by Turtle Beach. Hey, Turtle Beach. That is your go-to. You got the quality, quality headphones coming your from Turtle Beach. Yeah, I have said many a time at this point, but when you are getting, when you want to get some good headphones going, you want to get some comfort on your ears, you want to get the sound quality crisp. If you're playing at late night and you want to hear what's going on and there's other sounds

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Thanks, Turtle Beach. Thanks, Turtle Beach. Excuse me. All right, what is going on? There's some news this fucking week. Yeah? Yeah. Yeah, where are we going?

Where do you, what do you got? Let's just go there. I'll throw in the scraps that you may have missed. Yeah, there's a couple things going on, I suppose. I scrapped together a couple of scraps, as you said. Things that appear to be pretty loud. Things that appear to be kind of, ooh, hey, what the fuck is happening over at Roblox, man?

Oh, I knew it. That was the first one on my fucking list, too. All right, so let's go into it. Roblox is a platform that, the kids can play games on and you can make your own games on it and it's basically like the digital equivalent of those toys that you could program

and make into different robots and shit like that. Next level of like the Minecraft's like making your own entertainment thing which my little nephew was like hey you stream games and he was like kind of getting excited about stuff and he's like

you know I think you should really consider getting into Roblox I think you should redirect I think you should redirect with younger audience Part of your channel. It's also very popular. For streaming, it's very popular. Towards Roblox content, yes. It is explicitly a game for children

in that it is extraordinarily popular with children. So, when you combine a game that is extraordinarily popular, popular with children with voice chat and online infrastructure, and absolutely no oversight. whatsoever of any kind you create an issue in which it becomes very,

very, very, very popular with some of the worst people you could imagine, aka kitty didlers. Who love hanging out on Roblox. Yep. Love it. And this has been a known

thing forever. This has been a known thing, like literally the first thing I ever heard about Roblox was, man, there's a lot of creepy dudes on there trying to talk to kids. First thing I heard was that, hey, my nephews was like, you should put that,

you should do content for that. Second thing I saw was, there's a fighting game on there. And then the third thing I saw was, oh, oh, there's some bad, bad vibes, bad juju. So this story in particular, what I saw was Roblox is being sued by the state of Louisiana. And I was like, huh, okay. now given all the bullshit with MasterCard and such recently and collective shout and all that horse shit,

I was like, hmm, okay. Totally unrelated, actually. These are totally, totally unrelated. I was like, what's going on there? Are we looking at a case of, you know, like, or is this some of that like UK child verification stuff going on? What's going on here? And then the first headline underneath that was alleged child. kidnapping sparks lawsuit as California law to protect kids online is stalled.

And it's like an actual child got kidnapped via creepers on Roblox and Discord. So when was this? Article was August 13th, 2025. Okay. So that one's newer than the actual genesis of this explosion of news. So the explosion of news comes from a YouTuber named Schlep. Now, I'm not personally familiar with Schlep, but apparently he's a very large Roblox content creator. Schlep basically said, bro, I'm on Roblox all the time.

I'm really sick of the crazy amount of groomers and petos that I'm dealing with on a daily basis. This is fucked up. You guys got to do something about this. So his first step was to compile an enormous amount of information and documentation on the dudes that he would run into and send it to Roblox over and over and over, only to be completely iced out and ignored. Naturally. So Schlepp said, well, fuck this. And he picked up the phone and he called the FBI and said, hey, do you guys want to catch like a ton of pedos super easy? and the FBI said

Fuck yeah, let's do it You'd think That's what they were interested in But anyway, you'd think Of this series of events They said yes Hmm They said well let's just make sure

They're not on this list first Anyway Um Pause All right, there we go All right Um Yeah well

It depends That's a good answer Um Anyway, so that's really good. That Astna is dead off. Anyway, so point B, Schlep says, okay, fuck it, I'll do it myself. And so combined with a couple people from the Federal Bureau of Investigations, they catch six or seven guys and they get arrested.

And those dudes are going to jail forever for attempted grooming, child endangerment. probably shit they found on their computers. They're going away. They're done so. As a direct result of, of Schlep and the FBI. Right. Basically, Schlep knows where to point. And, okay, and did not just film the content and then go and kick them in the balls a little bit.

Okay, didn't, didn't. They would run the old, okay, didn't, didn't just film. Did you remember the old AOL instant messenger gag? Yeah, yeah. of, yeah, I'm totally a 12-year-old girl. By the way, no, I'm not. I'm FBI, and then you would see them log out and you'd laugh because you ruined one of those freaks days. Yeah.

So Schlep and the FBI did that, but for Realseys. Okay. The Realze's version of that. Well, I'm just, what I'm trying to establish here is that it's important that you've mentioned that there was a result to what was being investigated and done, because there's a whole lot of asshole fucking people that are out there just, doing the same thing. And then the end result is to get some content as they invite someone to a Walmart parking lot so that they can just beat the shit out of them and then have them run away. And then no one gets arrested. And in fact,

they get away to continue doing it and make everything actually actively worse. But hey, you got some views out of the situation. Of that is, um, I caught you and you're at my house now and you have to beat me in like a first to 10 in mortal combat or else I'm going to turn you in. Awesome. Sure.

Or call your mom. That one was real. Yeah. It's pretty funny. but you should term in anyway. Yeah, and then there's call your mom and then just again make some content and then all right,

off you on your way. Don't be, yeah, whatever. But point being Schlepp works with the authorities and successfully did a good thing which is get bad dudes arrested and away from children. Now, Schlep obviously talked about this and made it public and then when Roblox found out

they said, hey, you're making children unsafe by impersonating people banned. You're banned off the Roblox says you can't do that. Right, right, right. He then went public with that. And the state of Louisiana was like, what the actual fuck? What are you guys doing over there? So the state of Louisiana got pulled in and they're going after Roblox for not doing

their due diligence for child safety. And supposedly, there are lawyers coordinating hundreds of simultaneous lawsuits that are supposed to go out either by the end of this month or September of

parents whose kids got groomed or creeped on by Roblox and when they attempted to get through to Roblox and have anything done, nothing would happen. Correct. And so the, uh, alongside that was the case of a 10-year-old girl that got kidnapped from a dude that she met on Roblox

and the lawsuit being filed in this case is from San Francisco at the same time. So, yeah, this is a sixth lawsuit against Roblox this year on behalf of groomed kids. So this is, so I can't confirm this because this is my gut, but I'm going to go with my gut on this. this to me, in my personal opinion, confirms something that I've wondered about Roblox for a long time, which is how it makes its money and how it's so successful. I have personally suspected that the actual business model of Roblox is providing an infinite amount of kids to wealthy pedos.

Hmm. Because the whales in this situation are not, paying tens of thousands of dollars in micro transactions so that they can play Roblox. It's so that they can have all of the coolest shit in a totally unsupervised environment with 10-year-olds. Interesting. So, as you say that, there has been... My personal opinion that I have and is not my personal opinion. Yeah. Well, it's just interesting because as you say that, there's, of course, been years of, you know, just there's tons of, there's tons of people that have gone into the, like, exploiting kids for labor and monetizing that and, and for their own money as well. That's a whole part of it. However, oh, well, I don't know what you just saw, but there's an article that I saw.

that is simply called Roblox CEO continues to hold his pitch of Roblox as a dating site. That's what just showed up. Yep. And so of all the things that were coming in about these cases and whatever is going on, here you've got an interview where the CEO of Roblox describes how he wants to continue emphasizing the 17 plus aspect of Roblox and making sure that inside of that you can have all kinds of. of social interactions and it's something that might be useful for people that are afraid to go on a real-life date. They can have a virtual date to start, for example.

Couldn't even get it up to 18, huh? So the person in charge of the platform has already expressed interest in pushing this as a virtual dating site. Yeah, so Roblox is a wretched scum of hive and villainy. It's not good. Because here's a thing. If I, okay, let's say, let's say I'm running a website for children, right? In order to safely have children continue to use my website and have everything work the way it's supposed to, it is in my incentive. incentive financially to make it safe for children so that people can continue to use it in

perpetuity unless I have a competing financial incentive to leave it unsafe for children. And monetizable. Yeah. Yeah. So if this story was Roblox CEO, plays dumb and goes, oh my God, we didn't know what this was happening. We are committed to parental controls.

And then didn't even do anything. You would be like, oh, they're just being lazy fucks. They just don't want to do the fucking pay some intern to fucking put part of the no, no, no, no, you're getting a direct insight into the philosophy of what the platform. Yeah. But instead, it's active attempt. to shut down making it safer. The CEO continued his discussion.

If a parent is uncomfortable with their child's use of Roblox, they should simply not let their child use it. As for him as a father himself, he expresses how in his own life he still feels uncomfortable with kids in specific situations stating, I'm not comfortable having his kids on the end of a dock right now without a life jacket on. Okay.

Um, yeah, you, this is what this is, you kind of have to wonder, you know, it's one of those situations where you go, hey, do you let your own kids use the platform, you know, or do you like, hey, Mark, are your, is your family on Facebook, you know, like, what is there, are you in there at all? You know, being inside an industry and having any degree of expertise in your field, that you are aware of the pitfalls in that field. So like, guys who, who. who helped design plastic devices for our day-to-day use

famously don't allow plastic in their homes. People who help design smart homes for Alexa have dumb ovens and dumb fridges and locks on their doors with physical keys. And you and I are new to the parenting thing. We are so fucking far

ahead at the ability to protect our kids from shit online as everybody else I run into at all the family events where people go, oh, I just don't know these phones. And I go, no, I know. Just don't let them have the fucking internet that you can't see until they're old enough to be like, you just can't. It's so fucked up out there now. Internet of things on all your objects. There's almost always an interview where said designers or people are going, hell no, I don't let my family use it. There's tons of those. It's crazy how many of those exist, you know? And every once in a while, you get the version where it's like the social dilemma or so, where they're like, actively, we are fighting against the thing we created. Actually, if you could help us, we're trying to

stop the thing that we create, you know, like, it goes completely the other way. it. So yeah. Kids love the torment Nexus. I mean, shit. You can build anything inside the torment nexus. You can make friends. You can go on dates inside the tournament nexus.

Dude, I met so many friends. And they're so cool. And they know so much about Transformers and Roblox and Smash Brothers. And they have their own basements, too. Dude. Dude, my new friend says I can play Smash Brothers and drink sodas all day. All right, all right, that's enough. That's enough of this entire...

We get it. We get it. Smash Brothers player. The FBI says, it depends. Yeah. See, because it's funny because, you know, you're like, the beginning of the story. It's like, oh, the YouTube creator went to the right authorities to help solve the problem. Like he did a social good for his community.

Yes. Overtly pro-social moral act. By turning it into the FBI who are totally on the up and up right now. What are you going to do, man? Come on. There's no way. What are you? I guess we'll find out.

Or we won't. I don't know. Anyway. So yeah. Hey, don't let your kids play Roblox. Or if you do, have them be totally supervised with you in the room the entire time. yeah I just straight up

yeah yeah yeah yeah there's just yeah anyway all right this is such a good news story for this week it's such a good one mm-hmm mm-hmm

it's just everyone's yeah right there's you just you just you wake up and you look at your phone and you go America

and you're just and you try to and like no come out all right so you know what my favorite yeah there's a tweet about this

yeah ago, which was a Dungeons and Dragons tweet, but I think it speaks to all of us, which is somebody going, I don't understand if I had a cursed object, I would simply put it down. Meanwhile, me with my phone, 12 hours a day. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. All right, so we'll find out what's happening over there. Now look, you know, I noted that earlier you took the moment. to say, hey, that you have your opinions and what you feel about the situation is specific to you?

That's right. I do say those things. I say a lot of things. You do. And the last I saw, you, you know, while you say those things, I thought I saw you, um, advertising, uh, the first descendant, uh, the, that's crazy. I don't remember doing that. Are you sure?

I'm pretty sure. In fact, I remember... Let's pull behind the curtain, shall we? Will he come behind the curtain with me and we'll pull it open? There's a really specific type of email that we get that is like way before a game comes out where you're like, oh, they already know

it's going to bomb because this email is like banking you to cover it. Just. And it's shit like, hey, do you want to co-stream the gameplay reveal at 2 in the morning on a Tuesday? Oh, it's going to be so sick. You could be a, you could be like a custom content creator. We'll put you in the program. And it's like, oh, it's going to be so good.

If the subject line for the email has a price figure in it. In the subject line. So, and then, and then, and so here's a game that I like to play, right? Here's the game. Are you ready? I never responded to a single first descendant email, not once. I never responded. They sent me like 30.

Like they were, they were very interested in having me say things about the first descendant. And I would like to imagine that they. that was actually a very common response. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Saying things on camera into the microphone about the first descendant. Now, what do we do, Willie, when we can't get Pat or Woolley or Mark Plyer or Charlie to talk about the first descendant? What do we do?

Well, it looks here like you just fucking take their likeness anyway. slap that shit on gameplay footage and have them say for example oh my god the big boss wallcrasser is invading I'm going to defeat it with my new descendant Nell she is a telekinetic powerhouse who could and just

just have it just fucking deep fake your a your your your influencer so you know what I really love about the the first descendant ad that we're talking about first of all I've seen it like I have seen the

specific one. Second of all, I've seen the content creator that they're stealing the likeness of. He does like exclusively super topical political American stuff. Oh, wow. He is, okay, he doesn't. It's not like you look at his channel and he's like, yeah, we're fucking gaming. Like he takes calls from people and argues about politics. Right. Like, it's not, it's not even the right one. That's crazy. Right. And also the voice and the face. are so, so not mixing at all. But it doesn't matter, right? And you're not even going for convincing anybody.

You're just, it's, it is, it is the slop garbage mobile game ad. But add the face of the person with the headphone talking, of which there's multiple, um, um, uh, YouTubers that they use, by the way. Uh, I saw like a compilation of like five or six of them. and it's just yeah run it through the script have their their their you know mouth flaps talk about the wall crusher or whatever talk about the new near automata uh uh uh dlc which is just like i see that i'm like oh my god yoko god damn it dude like i know you don't care but fuck man when two b shows up your game is dead oh that's what happened to soul caliber everywhere she's everywhere

Hey, Granblue versus is doing its thing. I think Gran Blue is the only one to survive. I think they're fine. You know, Jesus Christ, man. Yeah, it's just super creepy weird bullshit. But yeah, Nexon's Schluter, the first ascendant, is just unleashing AI streamers. And like, I think it's a combination of like fake AI generated people. and just, again, deep faking people's faces as well.

It's really obvious that game is not doing well. Mixed on Steam also. Mixed. Mixed reviews. Yeah. You know what? You know what? Since they're so desperate to have you and I talk about the first descendant, why don't I read the top Steam review that I find all of their Steam version?

That's funny because I was doing that just before we started, actually. These reviews are too long. No, I saw people... Oh, here's a good one. I saw people complaining about the grind, you know. Brough, I was looking forward to the near skin collab. Shamelessness. It's cheaper to buy Stellar Blade plus near Otamata than buying the skins button.

But it's free. It's an Exxon Schluter. Like, that's a free-to-play, like, with, you know. All right. The Anora one in. chat gives a piece of context that will work for people who play Warframe. Anora one says the equivalent of a Warframe potato in the first descendant cost $25 fucking dollars.

What is a potato? A potato's called an orican reactor. It's something you use to respec. Wait, no. What the fuck did potatoes for? No, you double your mod capacity. they're like a vital vital piece of kit

and they're like very very cheap they're like mandatory I would say they're mandatory when you're playing a frame you like or a weapon you like you can microtransact them but you can also get blueprints in the game

to just make them and they give them out for free a lot a potato and more frame costs like a quarter okay right and you can get them in game So, like, that being $25 is like, holy fucking shit. Yeah, but then if you, but then how else you were supposed to defeat the big boss wall

crusher that's invaded? I don't know. This, this might be a really stupid thing I'm about to say. But like, you're obviously putting no work into this ad at all because you've AI generated a person and you've AI generated the footage. you've slapped some B-roll on it. But AI generating the text and then not checking it once, leaving your ad to just sound like nonsense. It's like that one's the most important part.

Because even if they were stealing the likeness and the voice was garbage, if the script was actually an ad, you'd be like, well, maybe there's something there and these people aren't just idiots. but because it's also impossible to understand nonsense, it just leaves this thing like, I can't scroll past as fast enough. Dude, I don't think there's a human being involved anywhere in the entire process. I think Nexon pays money to a company that auto generates like 150 of these things and just spits them out over ad servers and buys the push time. There was.

And it's just, there is no checking anything. It's just, does it violate any? guidelines on the specific ad platform. No, all right, push it out there. And then it'll be gone and then we'll do another. You know, you just, that, there's no, there's no anything. There's no thought anywhere and it's at all.

I, uh, I recently saw somebody going to a subreddit about AI YouTubers. And it was, uh, just a bunch of posts of dumbasses going. So I have chat GPT writing scripts and then chat CBT generating videos to go along with those scripts and I'm auto uploading them to a YouTube channel. and I'm only getting like one or two or maybe 10 views a day on my whole channel, even though it has hundreds of videos. What can I be doing to make my channel more successful? I only spend about 30 minutes a week on it. Yeah.

Do you? Yeah. You're currently doing nothing. So if you did anything, that would be an improvement. No, you see, there needs to be a name for the fallacy, but like the just the absolute like brain head empty level of drooling thought that comes from well I can get I can get on this and start using this to quickly generate shit and then everybody will come to the shit that I'm generating without thinking about the fact that they can just generate the things too but there is a there is actually a term for that oh yeah it's called a get rich quick scheme oh well yes okay okay um because if your get rich quick scheme works why is not everyone using it to get rich quick. But like

Jordan fucking Belford or whatever, the Wolf of Wall Street had to at least go get a chair and a phone. And that's why it wasn't a get rich quick scheme. It was a regular scheme that they had to work

at really hard. Okay. Like that's the point. All right, all right. Yeah. All you have to do, is make thousands of dollars a month by putting small classified ads in your local newspapers once that wanted section and you'll just be rolling in it and everyone should do this I don't know what I was looking at but I just saw like a montage of like it I think it was like

demon slayer characters just running in the foreground and then a big monster in the back yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah and then there was like fought and then a bunch of other characters from other shit. And it's like a completely not real game, whatever shit generated. It's like, what are you advertising here? Like, what am I looking at? Is this even anything? Is this nothing?

The service economy that we currently exist in has proliferated an issue, which is completely fake jobs selling fake products to fake companies so that they can post fake earnings. Right. Like a significant portion of the global economy Is people just making shit up to look like they're working? Oh, well, yeah. I mean, fake numbers makes the world go round, dude. Like, that's, you know.

And remember, if you don't like the stats, you can just fire the person who makes them. I got to tell you, bro, all this nightmare shit really helping me with my imposter syndrome. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Are you feeling more competent? I feel like I'm doing like a real thing and a good job maybe. That's pretty good. Also raising a baby, like, you know, when the baby is good, you're like, I'm doing a good job. That's good. That's good. Okay. So you talked about wanting to jump back in and potentially check out some Seagot in Street Fighter.

Well, I just want to make sure that when you do that, I don't want you to accidentally violate the upcoming Street Fighter League Capcom guidelines for streaming. So I want you to just make sure that you're safe. And to not violate the new guidelines, you're going to need to make sure that only the safe parts of the screen are visible. All right? So I'm going to send you a picture here. Um, the area in red is not to be streamed and the area,

the area, the area, that's everything but the timer. That's correct. Okay. Um, you are allowed to, uh, co-stream, but by co-stream, that is to show your face and the timer of the match that you're watching, um, with no audio, of course, and to let people see the, the clock of the match. And then hopefully your excitement will allow them to, you know, just get, get the vibes and sync up. Also no audio.

Yep. So it'll be like a commentary track, you know? Like Pink Floyd. People who do like watch parties of like TVs and movies where they just put the, all they show is the timer of the film or like in VAC. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Exactly. No, it's it's 100% like Pink Floyd and Alice in Wonderland. You know, it's just

or Wizard of Oz, rather. How do you feel about this? I think it is the dumbest shit I've seen Capcom announced since I it is

bafflingly insane and it feels like an extension of the particular way that the Japanese e-sports league stuff is completely out of touch because like the S Street Fighter League stuff

is very much tied up with their e-sports Japanese broadcasting stuff, right? And all the corruption that came from their like having to the criminals that forced everyone

to sign up for this this fucking crooked group that was going to be like, we are in charge of handing out the payments or the prize money for anyone who competes in Japan because fuck you, that's why. We've made ourselves the authority.

I feel like this is just an extension of that. So the mentality that says, hey, you're not allowed to look at the guy from judgment because he's owned by Johnny's. You know, that same kind of thing comes into play here. We want to emphasize that you watch this while it's happening and hype it up. But people are supposed to turn on our stream and then turn on your stream at the same time and sync up the clocks. And that's how you're meant to watch it. I am actually torn on this because I agree that just allowing the timer is like hilarious and very stupid

it's a direct result of it being a pay-per-view and the actual discussion is whether or not e-sports championships should be pay-per-views and I don't know because in an ideal world evolution would require a $10 ticket to watch online and then they would throw that into the prize pool, and then the prize pool would then descend into the hundreds of competitors instead of top eight.

Quick question. But we don't live in that ideal world. Quick question. Are you interested in getting people to watch your thing, and you'd like that number of people to grow? No, I'm interested in making money. Oh. Shit, then yeah, I guess I'm torn on it too.

because like here's the thing here's the thing I'm not I'm an event organizer let's say I'm an event organizer I'm not like emotionally attached to the future of street fighter right right right right right right to my bank account

this is a dilemma this is hard this is truly difficult there is money to be had from each of these individuals um there's also we could just show up at their door and beat it out of them.

That's always a solution. I don't think it's a particularly good solution most of the time. They might not want to watch more Street Fighter after we beat it out of them. But there might be some returning customers. You know, it's possible. Yeah, man. I think if you're going to treat e-sports like sports, then you need to look at like there's a really, really, really long history of televised sports, right?

And what sports could get away with charging money to see the thing and what couldn't? And traditionally, you know, the Super Bowl, you just turn on your TV and watch it, right? But, you know, the UFC fight or the wrestling show, we're going to call sports for this purpose. is something that you would pay to see at the, you know, at the day and date. Where it gets complicated is that while watching the Super Bowl is free, it's also attached to the fucked up cable package that you had to get only to watch the Super Bowl. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

In terms of e-sports, it's actually crazy how long e-sports organizations have gotten away with just broadcasting the whole fucking thing for free. forever, especially when the ads on e-sports suck and don't work. Well, maybe for starters, if the community that you're trying to monetize has had a fucking multi-decade long history of just having people show up grassroots, organizing their own tournaments and putting them out there, maybe, maybe, maybe you don't burn that all to the ground immediately by by showing up and trying to nickel and dime absolutely every aspect of it, destroying the community aspect of it. And then the worst part, the most frustrating part, is having these criminal organizations that suddenly see that there's red in the water,

getting Capcom on their side to approve of their rules and agree with it and go along with it. you know, that stuff with Momuchi from back a couple years ago where it was just like, there was no official e-sports anything in Japan. People could, you know, and then all of a sudden a group comes out of nowhere, declares a private company gets created by private individuals with capital that go and say, we are the e-sports regulatory board, right? Like this is not an ESRB type situation or something where it was like, you know, there was a government thing that then had to have someone's,

step in to stop a lawsuit or protect from further encroachment. Just a completely private company. I don't know or just showed up and said, no, no, we're the official ESports regulatory board. If you want to do anything ESports related in Japan, you must sign up through us. And there were, people were like, fuck you, that's bullshit. And then they talked and greased enough palms of enough companies that make games that those companies went, yeah, from now on our prize money goes through this company. Well, here's the thing. And then that was the end of the discussion.

You're completely right. And you told that that breakdown before, and it's to e-sports's pride, I would say, that they are getting closer and closer to regular sports every day by being so outrageous and corrupt. That's a respectability thing, right? Ideally, for me, I would like to see e-sports athletes, which there should be a new term. I don't like using the term athlete for guys that look like me. But I would like them to get paid. That is my ideal scenario.

If you are performing at a high level and you're doing a competitive thing for the audience, I would like you to get paid. However, I don't think any of this money trickles down to them. Competitors, there, thank you. However, at the end of the day, if the e-sports scene for your game completely fucking dies, then it'll just go right back to the grassroots shit. That is a positive. That is a positive of the situation.

That is true. That will just continue to exist regardless. Think about, like, call of duty and the amount of money that's been thrown into the open furnace that is the call of duty e-sports scene for, like, no interest. And esports is different.

For a very specific reason, is that when Capcom holds the street fighter tournament, let's say they have ads for Red Bull or like Pornhub or whatever the fuck. It doesn't matter, right? Those ads seem to be traditionally ineffective. However, the primary ad for Street Fighter Six's invitational tournament is Street Fighter Six

that Capcom is advertising for the thing that they own. Correct. Go buy the game. Yes. Directly. There is an incredibly clear incentive for them to have everybody watch it. So is SFL run by Capcom? or is it run by a separate organization? So it is an official tournament,

but I believe it's co-run by a billion sponsors alongside Capcom. Right? That's the reason. You look at it and it's not Capcom Cup, for example. Yeah. And believe, well, you see, you say that, but here I thought the whole point of Street Fighter 6 was to sell Chipotle. I thought we were just doing this

to get the fucking beef bowl, you know? Yeah, I kind of just can't help but get that feeling that you're like, you're looking at this random thing that a bunch of, again, grassroots, whatever, a bunch of people on their own made an organization. And then all of a sudden, you know, you know that like, hey, would you travel back in time

and just like take out baby FIFA? If you saw like, if you saw the Olympic Commission like in its infancy and you could wipe it out of existence, would you take that opportunity? Because a baby Olympic commission or a baby FIFA has just showed up

into your hobby and is threatening to grow up. You know, it feels kind of like that when I see this type of shit. Yeah. All right. Yeah. Okay. Anyway.

If Capcom's co-running this, then it's dumb as shit. They are. This is an official thing. It's complete. Like, aside from our experience, it's absolutely laughably fucking stupid for them to kneecap their own audience that they should be catering to with free content. So they're excited about Street Fighter and spend more. money on Street Fighter by going, no, no, no.

But once again, the J-Su, the organization, the ESports license crap, whoever that was, they greased the right palms. They talk to the right people. They fucking, you know. Yeah, that's why e-sports in Japan will never be as fucking big as it is in the U.S. Go to the Street Fighter Esports League copcom website and scroll down and look at the official partner list of a bunch of companies here that are all. you know, part of this as well.

The U.S. isn't perfect at everything, but in terms of e-sports, the fighting game gang of fucking do whatever is a pretty good solution. You get enough people hearing some cameras. Okay, we're doing a show. Anyway, absolutely ridiculously stupid. And, you know, hey, look, if you're feeling real stressed out by all that,

and you know you're just like damn I can't stream the Japanese Street Fighter League stuff and you're in Japan well you could just head on down to McDonald's and get a happy meal I don't think I can

I think my local McDonald's in Japan yes that's where you might right me my local McDonald's in Japan is actually bizarrely out of food today and there's just enormous dumpster piles of trash right outside the door

this happens at least like once or twice a decade, right? There is always a promotion at a major store for a thing that's going to have a whole lot of scalpers coming through and it results in mountains of garbage of food thrown out on the floor of the establishment and then a big apology comes right after. I would like to, so basically they had limited edition Pokemon cards for happy meals and so people would just show up by as many happy meals as they could get a hold of to get the cards and then throw the happy meals on the ground outside the restaurant.

I mean, at first it seemed like we're going to need, like, at first it was like, okay, let's put it in the garbage, and then it was like, well, there's no room in the garbage, so let's just put it around the garbage. And then it just became- And now the garbage is invisible. And now it just became, well, I'm going to take the cards out of the bag and let it go and where gravity falls is where they lie. So this, so everyone's probably noticed.

the scalping is getting worse and worse and worse and worse. I'm of the opinion that this is a recession indicator. So we've always had people going totally nuts for limited-edition products. Happy meals, Beanie babies, Leboos. Leboos. But the frenzy behind scalping seems to correlate with the fact that people need to get money somewhere. Yes, and you have a secondary channel of commerce, which fluctuates according to hype. And also, you're really, really, really doubted out on those NFTs.

You're still taking a beating on those apes. So you're desperate for a dub. Here comes McDonald's. Oh, boy. Um, yeah. So for a lot of businesses, there's absolutely no incentive to stop scalping for a little while anyway. Because it's, it's a guaranteed market that'll buy up all stock instantly. Right.

It's fucking awesome. It happens every time. Every time, dude. Um, by the way, did, was it you that I talked to about Labuboos? No. No. About the dark patterns with Labibu. Oh.

No, we haven't talked about it, but I'm well aware. I've watched a family at a claw machine wailing to get a rare Labubu. You don't know how dark the Labubu pattern gets. Labibu has the darkest dark pattern I have seen in my life. I mean, we live through Beanie Babies, dude. No, you don't understand. Okay. You can go to the Lubuobu website.

right? And Lububu's are blind boxes. They are gatchez. Yes. Yes. Okay. Yeah. So here's the part where it's the darkest dark pattern of all.

You go to Labubu and you go, I would like to buy a Labubu blind box, right? When you purchase it off the website and it sends it to you, right? And it's shipped and it's confirmed. You can't, there's no takebacks, right? You bought the blind box and it sends it to you. And the shipping is confirmed. or sorry, no, the purchase is confirmed with your card. It will then tell you what was in the blind card.

Oh! Upon click? Yes. Oh! And then it will ask you, would you like to buy another one? Oh! Oh, my God! Oh, that's the darkest.

That is the darkest thing I've ever seen before it even arrives. Yes. What? Oh. Oh, the addiction machine. Oh, my goodness. And then the shipping and the situation where you go, no, I want. Until, until, until.

And then what happens? You end up with 30 garbo luboos that show up at your house. Wow. It's the fucking one per case mentality, but you just, you keep that, and you instantly get the feedback on click. Yeah, they used gacha pole like dark patterns for real life. applied them to physical items. It's also like the most wasteful thing ever.

Wow. Okay. Does it become an even darker dark pattern if the Labou you're trying to get is the blackface one? No, that was custom. Oh, okay. So the lady, the lady who, there's a sound on TikTok, whereas I, some British lady, I have the only 24-carat-gold Labubu, which is the Labu-Boo that she dipped in gold. Okay.

For social media. And then she got really popular, because that's pretty funny. And then immediately pulled out like an insanely racist black-faced Laboo-Boo-Boo. Like, it's like number two. Okay, okay, okay. And everyone went, oh, whoa, okay. Okay, okay. That's a different kind of dark pattern.

Yeah. Yeah, got it. Understood. Um, yeah. Wow. Wow. That's impressively evil. You're like, if you're an addict, you stand no chance. Rock, how many Labubu blind boxes do I need to buy to get the gold Labubu? I mean, the only thing further... You see, goonibus are actually victims of a genocide and something. Thanks, Grog. The Laboo Boo Boo Boo-Booer. Good. That's good. That's good.

That's A plus. Unfortunately, I'm not feeling too good about it. Listen, the only thing more evil I can imagine is if you then had a button that let the person who bought 30 and got nothing basically be like, do you want to just trash those 29 so that we don't even send them to you? you know, do, and then we just keep them. And then we actually take your money, but we don't send the product out. But you don't want all that plastic, right? I mean, there's, there's the extra bit of this is like, okay, you've re-rolled 30 times to get your, I don't know what the lububoos even look like.

You get your fucking. It's a little, little gremlin face, whatever, yeah. And you're, that's the one you want. It still has to survive the shipping process to you. sure yeah so there's the possibility that you blew x amount of dollars on getting your super rare luboo and it just dies or is lost in shipping or gets porch pirated yeah man um anyway i i'm i'm curious to see if uh this is going to make it through the end of the year or are we talking just Like at what point does the money launder scheme, you know, give out?

Like, is it a matter of... Those Pokemon cards in Japan are absolutely being used for money laundering. Oh, yeah, of course. The worst thing you can do with money is keep it as money. Like, what the fuck? What if I turned it into an ape? Huh? I can't imagine.

I can't imagine how many criminals lost their shit on NFTs. Like, like, like dudes doing real ass, like drugs slash trafficking crime that were like, yeah, let's put it into this weird non-fungible, unsourceable crypto thing. And then we'll sell them and the money will be clean. And it's like, oh, I sold all these drugs for nothing. Like, what am, there's a White House coin, dude. Like, what am I supposed to anyway? Right. Yeah.

Um, let's just, let's just get out of here. Have you noticed crypto guys have stopped talking about replacing money with crypto? That that pie in the sky goal no longer exists? I feel like they still are, but it's... Oh, that was like the, that was the cell. Like in five years, crypto's going to replace money.

And it's like, no, it's not. No, it's, but it's, it's illegal. Transaction currency is what it is. It's for, it's for, it's for Roblox, uh, fucking transactions.

Yeah. Yeah. Like, exclusively. Oh, oh, it's all linked. Oh,

it's all linked. Yeah. Our society is cursed and doomed and fucked. I'm really excited for gamescom tomorrow. Silk Song might be there. Yeah. There's, yeah.

Sure, man. Take some emails. Hey, if you want to send in an email, send it to Castle Super Beastmail at Gmail.com. That's Castle Super Beastmail at Gmail.com. Why are they making a new Lord of the Rings? The search, sorry, the hunt for Gollum. They burnt through everyone's patience with a trilogy of Hobbit movies. Like, tap out.

You know what? I do have a piece of good news, though it is a little old. Did you see that, um, Coyote versus Acme was not Not deleted, but it was sold to a new company who was going to put it out next year. Who's actually going to put it out? Yes, yes. I imagine there will be like a fiasco of watch party activity for going to watch that movie after so long. Although, also people say it's pretty funny.

It says pretty good. I heard that people who did get to see it said that it was one of the best movies, Warner Brothers ever made and that made it extra weird that they were so desperate to kill it. Oh, someone in the chat says that the copyright on Lord of the Rings is going to expire in 30 years. Milk, milk, milk, milk, milk. That explains it, yeah, and all the games and everything. Right, right, right, right, right. Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah, you got to get it while you got it.

Get it while you got it. True, true, true. Can't be having these Popeye, Winnie the Pooh, Steamboat fucking Willie ass. Copyright free. productions going on. If you got an email, Castle Super Beastmail at gmail.com. What do you got for?

Email. All right. Let's see. Hello, Dan and Datter. Would you make a Faustian bargain of never being able to play Silk Song when it comes out in exchange for a very detailed documentary

on its development? That's such a good bargain. It's pretty good. That's a really good bargain. I'm tempted. I'm really tempted, but I'm afraid that it might be a really underwhelming.

Yeah. That's my expectation. Like it might be a really underwhelming not story at all. It might just be, yeah, we just, things got away from us. We just took forever.

I expect that the stories, so I dug into this recently to try and figure it out. And I believe I have a rough draft of what may be there. So to the question of what the fuck is going on with their social media, the answer is, is that the three gentlemen who make Silk Song are not active on social media at all, even in their personal lives. Okay. So they're like probably relatively ignorant of all the nonsense. They've just been feature creeping their shit off. That can't be possible.

Like no one's telling them that everyone's mad. Oh, I'm sure people are saying, hey, people are really excited. They really want to know what's going on, but that's it. I think, I think, I've heard a multitude of stories of people that are like really high up in the games business being like totally baffled by public reception of their games. And listen, being out of touch, you know, is not is not a rare thing in this industry. However, I don't believe that for the simple reason that as somebody who has creative thoughts and desires to get those out there into the world, anyone who's making a video game can't wait to see what everybody has to say about the thing they're making. That sounds really true. It's not a universal.

The idea that they're being gate-kept away with not without knowing for like years. No, I'm not saying gate-kept. It's the type that just put their head down and do it. I mean, is that better or worse? People in chat are pointing out, like, from software, from software spent like most of the lifetime of that company not understanding what people did or did not like about any Dark Souls game. Like, you had features that would disappear and reappear at random because they were discussions that happened internally without any external feedback at all ever. I mean, like, if. Isn't that dangerously close to Concord's toxic positivity?

A little bit. Yeah. A little bit. Yeah. Right? Aren't you being filtered from the truth here? Yeah. Like, people are pointing out, like, Miyazaki of From Software, does not play the Dark

Souls series. Right. He designs them. Like, that's fucking way weirder. than anything else I could ever hear. And for sure, there's a massive difference between, you know, what we're Talit talking about in Silk Song's case and like Harada, for example, who's like on Twitter aggressively responding to feedback before content drops, right?

You know what? I have one that's newer, one that could have been a part of this week's stories. So Atlas recently put out a statement about P5X, which was basically suck our dick. were not changing shit that matters. But of note is that the Japanese developers at Atlas, who were assigned to P5X,

said, you know, we didn't know that people beat the dungeons in a single day so they could do more of the social stuff. It was a really big surprise to yeah, there it is. There it is. There go the headphones.

What? Like, what? So despite the fact that they have been pulling out user data since Persona 4 Golden on the Vita for 13 years, no one there ever actually looked at it. It was all just being automatically sent out to players when pinged. psychotic. Devs can totally ignore everything. Oh my god.

Oh my God. Fucking. The metrics department was a mistake. They don't have a metrics department? No, they all do. Part of QA, there's a part of development where people behind the scenes are feeding information about gameplay back into

someone who's collecting plays statistics on things. English and French and German and Spanish and Brazilian Portuguese. And if they're taking any, even the most passive online feature, like, hey, what did most people do with these stats and then giving you suggestions? It means they're pulling that info. But, Wully. Oh my God. That's not how things are done on that side of the world. It's creator and dev focused. And the data is for the nerds over an accounting, I guess. Or maybe it helps with this

cool little feature for the players. Like one of the things that you and I love, about the specific context and nature of Japanese video games is their endlessly idiosyncratic and autore-based nature, which comes from not listening to fucking no one about shit. Ever. You said a different word from the one I thought you were going to say. Oh, what did you think I was going to say? A different word that starts with A-U-T, but, you know. Oh, no, no, no.

Okay. All right. Listen, Wave Runner says, Dear Genshin, Pat, and Honkai Star Wars. Yes. Pat's frustration

at playing any gacha is fully justified, as no game is ever good because of gacha mechanics. They're good in spite of being gacha. Like, I'm a huge Zeno Blade 2 fan, and I hate gacha mechanics. Yep. The other big issue is that

is that the fact that you constantly need to add new characters to pull for, even if the story starts out good, it's never satisfying because it's never made to end by design. You're never allowed to get too attached to one character. Not enjoying a gadget game is a normal reaction. They're designed to not be enjoyed, to just endlessly be consumed like a second job. That's a pretty apt summary of what's going on there. Yeah, that feels about right. I recently was talking to somebody

and they were telling me about some cool shit in Honkai Star Rail and I had to be like you need to stop sending me stuff about Honkai Star Rail. Like I had to like I wasn't mad and like they didn't know. Well they knew a little but but I had to be like you when you talk to me

and talk up how cool this boss fight in Honkai Star Rail is you are walking up to me and going dude these cigarettes are so delicious. Oh, And they're low, oh, they're low calorie. I love them.

Oh, have you tried them? Have you tried these new cigarettes? Oh, they're so good. Like, that's what it feels like. I'm, like, for a game, like, in terms of just, like, endless collecting as a thing to unleash on people, you know, from the Pokemon days forward. The fact that people, like, when you talked about, like, FF14 coming to, like, the end of certain parts or major chapters or drops and people feeling satisfied with that, I'm, it's pretty impressive. That is surprising, considering, like, yeah, there is a nature to a lot of this, which is like, it never stops. It goes on forever.

You are never going to feel satisfied with this game. There's an incredibly core distinction there. Any good MMO makes it so that those drops are not random forever. There is some underlying mechanic for, hey, if you never get the bird, mount to draw from the sky and you run it a hundred times, you can just buy the fucking mount. Right. There's another element too here where now that I've played a bit of punishing Gray Raven

and I've played some of Zenless Zone Zero and so on, I can see that like, okay, you take the game that we want to play, which is doing combos, yeah, doing combos in a stage against a bunch of cool stuff. And then you have the like cutting it up and putting the gatcha shit in. spite, like they said, in spite of its gameplay so that you have to put a layer in between you and the thing you want, as we described for the last couple weeks. But then also, there's the part where you're like, and because it's like on your phone and it's designed to be played on anything, these games can't be really big anyways. So you're going to have a two room stage. So you're

going to kind of go fight like 10 or so enemies and then it's going to be over. And like that's what the actual gameplay is, you know? There's no actual like feeling of doing a stage or anything like that. Or if you fight a boss, it's in its own instance in this one thing or so, and that's kind of how it's also cut up into be piecemeal. That makes it awful too. I think the part that gets me the worst is that I believe that if Hoyoverse sat down and made a real ass video game, they would have a game of the year contender on like their first try. If they tried. If they gave it, if they really, really tried. If they mean like a real RPG that was just a regular ass RPG, I think they would have like something like almost as good as clear obscure on their first shot.

Yeah, but like the millions they make would be negative billions they could have made. You know, but on the flip side, they're using their gacha money to create new forms of nuclear technology. So who the fuck am I to judge? Like I just, you know, I... They're getting real doctor octopus over there. Like, when we talk about like, oh, yeah, it's annoying. Imagine playing devil-making. cry and then putting that stupid rolling bullshit in front of it and all yaddy yada etc okay now imagine you take the game starts and you run as Nero down that

hallway you bank to the left you fight a bunch of the enemies in that first plaza and then the stage is over yeah man now the next stage is jumping over the wall and going to the alleyway like just fuck all of that um anyway um let's take one more um um Um, let's see here. Uh, from John, dear Castle Super Dads, I was going through some older podcasts of yours lately and decided to listen to episode 50. Dogs must, dog names must be blue collar. Um, you guys talked about for about half an hour discussing cannibalism in your preferred methods of how you partake. You both came to a general consensus that assuming it was ethically sourced and the person wasn't watching, you'd try a single bite of steak.

Uh, has your opinion not changed on the matter? is there a different way you'd like it to be prepared, et cetera? I don't know why you want to particularly revisit this, but I don't remember what I said 300 episodes ago. I guarantee that I'm not going to get fucking prions. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, that's important. That's important. You can guarantee me that I'm not going to get prion disease,

and also it's ethically sourced, and everybody's cool. with it. Yeah, I'll eat a person. I don't give a shit. For me, I was like, if you could 3D print it, right? If you could 3D print it. That's, that's... Wait, why does that bother me? Why does that bother you? I'm like, that doesn't count.

I'm like, wait, what? What am I? No, if you can 3D print the meat and it's not, it's not actually coming off the person, I'd be more down. That's your human tofu. It's lab grown and it's weird, but I'm, to me, that's more ethical. Part of me is like, what's the point? And I'm like, why do I think that? Why does, yeah, why does it?

Wait, it bothers you more for it to be 3D printed than to come off of a person? No, it's just like, what's the point? I don't even get to say I ate a person. It's like... I ate a 3D printed cube of whatever. Well, it's a crab meat. Like, at this point, you're not eating real crab. A lot of people just use the fake crab meat and they think it tastes better, you know?

Yeah. I'm doing it. I'm essentially doing it for the bit here. Oh, I just want to be like I ate a person. See, I'm not doing it for the bit at all. For me, it's just like, what is that flavor? No, I'm good with, I'm good with regular pig, man. It's pig.

That's what the fucking flavor is. It's fucking pork. Yeah, but in the same way that, like, you know, I mean, like poultry is not always poultry. Like, you know, duck is, the things that taste like chicken are not exactly chicken. Right? I'm sure there's subtle differences for the gaminess or this or that. or whatever the fuck.

You know, I'm sure human being doesn't taste exactly like pork. I think it does, actually. Turkey don't taste like chicken. Chicken don't taste like duck. Apparently, I think it's just a lot of things taste like chicken.

I think that's just a generic meat flavor. But that's also a lie and that's also an oversimplification because things that taste like chicken don't always taste like chicken. They taste those things that taste like they're similar in texture, ultimately, but like there's differences, you know?

fucking like, there's a billion kinds of beef that don't even taste like beef, you know? The same cow. It always tastes like beef. The different, the same cow in different body parts taste super different. Like, I'd be down, I'd be down for the 3D printed taste test. I mean, I'll eat any 3D printed meat. I don't know the shit, but that's not, it's not like, oh, look, a robot made a food out of nothing. The, the bit is not even, the bit is not what I'm interested in there.

Yeah. And no, please don't, please don't melt my brain with fucking prion disease. Yeah, so I'm never, so I say I'd like a guarantee. There is no guarantee. So the answer is no. You see the scans of a brain with that fucking neurodegenerative shit? Like it just, there's not good. Swiss cheese.

Yeah, it's not, it's not, it's a bubble. All righty. That'll do. That'll do. Yeah, that'll do. Long pig. I'm off to eat somebody. Ah!

See you next week with brain damage. What happened at the urinal, Pat? Okay, so I might have, I had a bad situation happen with the urinal recently, and Paige got really mad, and by mad, I mean, she barfed on the street. Oh, no. So I had to pee, and we were out as a family, and I had to go use a public restroom, and I went into the public restroom and I don't know why

I don't know why but somebody was in the toilet so the urinals were the only options and the urinals were like weirdly high up like they were very high so I was like I remember

I remember the while ago Paige made fun of me for not pulling my stuff out through the front. And do you remember I told the story how I accidentally dipped my pants strings into the toilet? So I made sure to like, you know, pull all my stuff out. Are we playing worms Armageddon? Are we tilting the bazooka really high? I'm pulling my stuff out. No, this is worse.

This is way worse. I pull all my stuff out to make sure that, you know, I'm not going to go on my pants. accident, right? And so I walk up to it and I realize I actually, I swear to God, I have to stand on my tippy toes. Oh no. To get in. But then halfway through the situation, my tippy toe strength faded a little bit. And then as I lowered down the bottom of my fucking sack just scraped along the edge of the standing urinal and like fully flared. the lip, like not the inside with the water, but like the lip. You were close enough to touch it?

Yeah, dude, it was a really tall urinal. And I got, I tippy towed back up and finished off. But then I was like, oh. You didn't just pee on your balls. You got everyone else's pee on your balls. And so then I, I washed my hands really thoroughly. and then I went back outside where Paige and the baby were, and I'm like, we're supposed to walk back to the car.

And I'm like, okay, Paige, I have to tell you a story. And I have to tell you now before we get to the car because I don't want you to vomit in the car. And then she doesn't mean what could possibly happen. And I'm like, I accidentally dipped my balls onto the rim of the urinal. And then she threw up right there on the sidewalk. Right then and there. And we had to be like, ha-ha, mommy silly to the baby.

Oh, boy. And then when we got back to the car, we were, everyone was really, really upset. Everyone was very upset. And so what we did is Paige dug in her purse. And she got, um, those Lysol wipes that we used to like wipe down, um, um, uh, shopping carts. Yeah. With. And she handed me the pack.

And so I grabbed two of the big Lysol wipes. And I just like, while we were parked, I just grabbed them and just went in there. Yep. And just just mashed it all up with with Lysol. Horbath. Yeah. Yeah. And then I was informed that I was just cut off for the foreseeable future.

Oh, that's correct. I was, oh, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. If you didn't, if you didn't say it, I was about to. I'm like, listen, you know, not to overstep any boundaries here, but that is a quarantine zone. and quite frankly, your poor wife. We got to make sure that nothing

springs forth off of this. You know? Just, yeah, man, that is extremely reasonable. Holy shit. No, dude, it was that cold shock and just the feeling of like, I've done something terrible.

Oh, I mean... I, dude. Okay, okay. Here's the worst part. The worst part is that Yeah. I was like, man, I should just, I really need to pee, but I don't want to use like a local bathroom because they're all gross. And I was like, oh, I should just go find like a forest and just walk into the forest and piss. And she's like, don't do that. You'll get arrested. And then after I told the story, she's like, you should have just walked in. Well, I mean, at that point, you should have just gone into the fucking an alley. At that point, just hitting the stall and, and, you know, holding power distance is, is best, you know. had to, like to, I should, I should have seen the height of the urinal. Yeah, backed away. You can, you can't, you can't take that challenge on. Um, okay. Uh, I'm going to share with you a piece of tech that I've discovered under dire circumstances. Oh, this is. It might save your life in the future. I guess, I guess, we're at risk for life and limb now. That's what we're, that's where we're at. This is desperate times, desperate measures. If you walk into a situation, where you find yourself just unfortunately unable to arc up to that urinal.

Damn, that's tough. Hit the stall, and I know the stall can be a rough situation. I should have waited for the stall. What you might need to, what you can do if you walk into a rough stall is you stand back in the safe zone, right within the stall. avoid the assuming that like let's say half the stall is just no go no bueno stand back a little enough that you can get that arc into the bullseye and there's a point where your stream is no longer like going to have the the velocity to hit the target anymore and what you need to do is with like let's say paper towel in your hands or so lean forward until you are you are you are

That if this is the toilet, you're like this, you're standing safely, you're getting the arc, and then you eventually do this. And then you're, and you use your hand on the wall to, from a distance, and then you can directly not miss. And then you never have to step in anywhere where the horrors are going. You get the lean, the tactical lean going. And then, this doesn't work. No, I'm telling you. Legs I was given by God. Tactical lean.

This doesn't, this doesn't work. bully the solution to your problem like the solution you're advertising requires like arms and legs that got me into this situation in the first place okay I'm trying to help man

I don't know what to fucking pissed on the floor like I should have just I should have just I don't know what to tell you man I've this is this is what I've discovered as a way to solve the problem you know

uh fuck man so that was rough all right good DLC have a good week everybody