Castle Super Beast - Csb353 Boo Boo

Episode Date: January 11, 2026

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Yo. Happy holidays, Willie. How are you? Hey, did you know that this week was the only week that the date was 25, 25, 25, 25? I did actually know that. It can never happen again. It's the only time it'll ever happen. That's special. Do you know what my favorite time of day is? Mm-hmm. 1234, because it goes one, two, three, four. Wow. Wow. Wow. Wow.

the 25th day of the 25th month of the 25th after 2000 wow wow why do I have a feeling that someone brought this up to you like it was a fucking mind-blowing revelation no I just I read it and I thought it was the sickest factoid it rules I love I love little little tidbits like that what's up man how is your days. Going all right. Not too bad. You know. I guess they're not technically over. They're still ongoing. They're still ongoing. But, you know, we

had a good time. Baby experienced her first family Christmas. So I got to, you know, she came over. She got to see all the different faces, get stimulated, get overstimulated, you know? Oh, yeah.

But overall, just like all smiles and good vibes, you know, on her part. A lot of people. A lot of new paces to be met, and she was very chill about that. Got to experience her first screaming match in front of her. So that's the classic, the classic holidays, you know? That's what's going like, hey, welcome to the family.

Shit's popping off. This is how it goes. So, and it's like, of course, it's Christmas. It's the family getting together. People are going to be fucking losing going off. up there they go and is there any stop nope there's no stopping it all right all right so i have i have i have a couple of follow-up questions without getting too deep in it where did the family holidays take place over there you have no ability to stop this no no no no no no it was your house oh no no no

no no like quit it i don't care it's my house my rules no no no no the tradition for my entire life has been over there, you know, and we go visit and we, we go meet up and everybody gets together for a nice big old family dinner and it's great. You have no ability to stop this. But then shit starts popping off because it can't not. It can't not. And you're just, you're like, wow, there's just no tools in this tool belt to solve this, you know? That's so interesting because I never witnessed even, even like a raising of the voice at any

Christmases I've ever been to, but my family's a bunch of wasps. So instead, instead, it was polite, fake smiles and silent judgment, followed by crying on the 26th through the 28th. Wow. Okay. Okay. Okay. So I've gotten, so I've gotten to experience that now by proxy. Yeah.

Because through the, through the in-law connection, I'm starting to, I can catch some of that. It sucks. There's what you're describing. the screaming match, I think, honestly. I don't know. I don't know. It's faster. It is master.

Yeah, but that passive aggressive poison for years on end is wild, you know, and the flippant cutoffs are crazy. But all smiles up front, you know, I'm seeing, I'm seeing absolutely the difference between

insidious dots, damage over time, versus direct crits, you know, and, um, over the way I've gotten used to it every time, every single holiday season, we get together, we go, the family comes together, and there's going to be crits going down. Because there's just for whatever nonsense reason, two people are not going to be getting along.

So here's my follow-up question. Was the argument over some trivial-ass nonsense or an old thing? Because those are the two that show up at Christmas. It always starts this trivial-ass nonsense. Oh, okay, okay. And transitions into old thing, right? You can't not, because at a certain point, the trivialness and the energy going into it is, it's disproportional. It's like, hold on a minute.

You can't actually... Why are you so mad at me for the doily, man? You can't actually be that mad about the doily, right? Something else, where's the weight of this actually coming from? And then, oh, it's the old shit. We get the plumbing out, you know? I swear, it's, it's kind of... amazing to have that moment where I'm like, I'm sitting here. I'm in the same place where I first got my

Super Nintendo when I was a wee little fucking, and I'm in the same, I'm in the same spot and looking around going, I screamed and went, oh my God, my Super Nintendo. Me and my brother ran downstairs. We plugged it in for the first time and we were crawling around and having a good time. And I'm like, here I am with my kid and she's looking around in the same place. And wow. And there's the same yelling. And there's the same popping off and, you know, John. are flapping and yapping and people are going and you get to sit there with all the pressure of like cool it's up to me to break the generational drama oh boy oh boy you know and it's like hey let me see can i go and can i deescalate nope there's no deescalating here all right you motherfucker how dare

you try to deescalate yeah yeah i know escalate me yeah elder and the superior it's crazy It's ridiculous. You know, what... I told my dad to calm down once in his entire life. And that was that didn't... I saw that that was a mistake. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Yeah, no, you know, when there's kids getting scared in the room and I'm like, hey, maybe we can relax a little bit that you'd think that would do it, but not quite. So this is tradition. This is where we are, you know? Boy, boy, oh, boy. I was like, yep, some things we're going to learn and some things are going to come from outside the household. And it'll just, you know, because I mean, at first there's a couple years of just, wow, that's what's going on. That's kind of, it's getting loud and scary that eventually at some point it's like, I guess that's just how it goes.

Oh, they're on that shit again. Mm-hmm. And then then comes, I guess, layer three, which is like, okay, and so this is what we don't do. You see that? Okay. Now let's have the talk about what that was and why we don't do that. If you want to get real, if you want to get real in there, you want to get real, like, real uppity, you want to get real assholeish. You can start gentle parenting your older relatives.

Wow, Unk. It seems like you're having a lot of big feelings. It's not our inside place, is it? Oh, fuck. Damn. I should have tried that shit. that would be yeah wow okay big big feelings yep now we talked about this this isn't the way we talked now okay now let's try again let's try again damn that would have been good fuck okay i got to bring

that tech next time around you know i mean i yeah or or and even just walking up with the kid just being like okay so so you know like here let's try that Again, let's take it from the top. You know, I just tried, I just tried dropping some of our, uh, our grandmother's quotes in the name of peace and none of that worked, you know, because she would always be, because my back in the day, there'd always be the chaos and the nonsense. And then my grandma back then when she was around would just come over the top and just start saying some shit that ended it, whatever it was, you know?

It doesn't matter what you're screaming about. You'd come in and just be like, No me, know you. No me, no you. Oh, you're chilling. You know, I'd just be going off about it. I was like, who was talking about? And she's just like, I, she just wants everyone to know that you exist because she does.

And that's it. So whatever you're talking about, it doesn't matter. My voice is louder now. Time for you listen to me, you know. It's my experience that the type of person, be it a work thing or a family thing or even a group setting, that loses their damn mind over some trivial nonsense in a calm, friendly setting is not going to listen to any attempt to de-escalate, no matter how ridiculous they look. Yeah, well, because then ego gets on the line and, you know. Because then they have to shrink.

Yes. They have to, they have to. You can't back down. They capitulate. You can't back down. Not here in front of everybody. It's impossible, you know. So, but, but again, of a voice of authority from the matriarch.

from my grandmother at the time can do that for everybody but she ain't around anymore so there's no de-escalation there's a power vacuum you know because that's it like if you're fucking in your 50s and an old lady calls you a little picnic

you're gonna be like yeah yeah I am a little picnic you know that's I mean it's old or not you still have people above you if they're still around that's what it is so there's no hierarchy to defer to there in any case So lessons were learned, but other fun stuff is being learned too, you know. She is currently popping off at the concept of clapping.

Oh, dude, that's a great one. Clapping is tech, man. I love that. Because it's like, wait, wait, why are there noises coming out of your hands? Are you happy? And do you know it? Right? Uh, uh, and it's like,

you're getting this like I have so much energy and I don't know what to you know and I'm like putting them again let's put our hands together and she's like there's a really specific moment that you may or may not see I don't think I saw it where much like a like a four year old gaining awareness of their own existence like is a a one year old or less understanding that effects happen due to causes yeah yeah yeah yeah absolutely Oh, I mean, there's already these moments of like, hold on, I can't put this in my mouth if there's already a sys in my mouth. It's impossible. What now, you know? And then, and then. Real like square peg, round hole thinking. Yeah, yeah, you know, it's like I, you can't relax. You can't, you can't do two things at once.

And, uh, and the other bit is like, okay, you get the little, um, shaking kind of like Maraca toys, you know? Yeah, yeah. Um, and again. take it and a noise happens. Right. And like her seeing that is she's like, yo, right? And we start shaking onto rhythm and she's like, good, g, right?

And then it's like she puts it in her hands and she's starting to do it and click it, you know? And she's getting really excited, really excited about the shaking and the clicking. And then like every time there's an attempt to shake and a click, it's like, okay, but hold on it because I got to put it in my mouth too. I got to put it in my mouth. But then I want to shake it, but I also, at the same time. It's really vital.

It's vital that I taste. It's like you can't, you can't shake and taste at the same time, girl. I may have mentioned it to you before. Maybe I mentioned it on my stream. But you're like constantly trying to like grab like things that your kid's not supposed to eat out of their mouth. Because, you know, it's not food. But at the same time, I look around. I look at like the desk.

And I'm like, I could ballpark what all this shit tastes like, even though I never put it in my mouth. Huh? Why is that? Oh, because when I was a baby, put tons of shit in my mouth. Yeah. I was supposed to. No. And there's a texture thing, of course.

And like, this is all important. You know, they talk about how these are good things, let them learn with the mouth. And, but it's a, you're putting together all the bits. It's kind of like when you're squishing around solids and so on. Yeah. One bit, though, is like, we have a toather that came from, um, my awesome brother-in-law. And it's a super Nintendo controller that's a T-thing that's for toothing, teething. Oh, cool.

It's very cool. And it's like, oh, that's cute. She's holding the controller and she's, like, chomping on it. And it's comforting. And that's nice. And she's learned. that we show on controllers. Great. Good, good, good.

This bodes well for the immediate future. Hey, hey, I'd like to tell you, whatever, whatever cause and effect you're going to try and teach your child, it will fail the first time. And I'm at two and a half, still failing it every time. 100% of the time,

the wrong lesson goes through on attempt one. Awesome. Awesome. Love that. That's exciting. Um, because you forget that there's like a hundred preceding causes for your own like boundaries of any particular thing. And, and again, like, just like last time I was talking about how it's like, you can't stay up and also be asleep at the same time. But I want to though. And like, yeah, the, the, the idea of there being limitations in general to what is possible is currently taking its toll, you know, it's increasing the stress.

so um but that's you know that's that's that's that's that's all fine and dandy i i don't know um well again i know that like learning to clap is something that can happen early if you can it's awesome if you can get it going but right now it's just like every song getting enhanced with the claps the idea of because i mean we had the songs and then we had the clapping then oh my god did you just put them did you just put them together that's crazy Oh, I'm going to see if I can eat my whole hand. Oh, I'm barfing. Oh, I'm choking.

Oh, I can't. I can eat the whole thing. I can't believe. And then the feet are bite like luke hanging. You know, and it's just like, I can't believe you put together the clapping with the music. That's wild. I can't do it. That's the hype as shit I've ever seen.

Good times. Oh, that was good stuff. Oh, that was so long ago. It was like six months ago. Yes, yes. No. So that was nice. And beyond that,

had a lot of stuff going on, had a week. You mind about talking about my Christmas first? Absolutely. So this was the first Christmas that Santa came to visit. Hmm. Hmm. Because we have a thinking, talking little man now. now. So we, we, we, we, we, we hyped him up like Santa's going to come down, bring you presents.

Uh, we saw as, as I described last week, uh, on the 23rd, we went and saw Santa. Um, that was hilarious. Because as we walked into the, the little mall where Santa was at, all of a sudden, my little guy who was so excited to talk to Santa, didn't want to see Santa anymore. wait, wait. Quite afraid of Santa. Why? Because Santa was a big, big man. So he talked to Santa from,

from maybe 30 feet away in a whisper. And the mom and dad translated him from afar. Okay, because he's a big stranger. Yeah. He didn't know what to ask for. And then we're like, okay. And so you build him up, build them up. I mean, you're meeting a celebrity. It's, it is

kind of intimidating. And then I was like, can you say bye bye to Santa and he went no okay all right and then we went home and we got everything ready right and then we put him to bed and as we're going to bed it is

945 p.m. on the 24th of Christmas and he turns to page and goes mommy can can Santa bring me a new ball it's 10 o'clock kid 10 o'clock kid

at 10 p.m. on Christmas Eve, we have to start explaining that, oh, no, Santa's already on his way. But mommy and daddy can get you a ball later. And he was like, okay. O'Sleep, right? So then we do the morning. Oh, my God, the presents are here. And he runs right past the tree and right past the presents to pet the cat and pet the dog and wish the cat and dog good morning.

And we're like, oh. Okay. And we're like, hey, man, look, the presents under the tree. And he goes, yeah. And it was at this moment that after talking to him about getting presents and how Santa was going to come and get him stuff, we discovered we had actually completely failed to explain what a present. It was. Yeah. It's just a box with some colors on it.

It's just a fucking box. And he would go, yeah, presents. It's just a box with some colors on it. What is this? Yeah. Because for his birthday and for last Christmas. Christmas, we just, we just handed him things. Oh, man.

Yeah. Okay. Okay. Yeah. Big steps. And so we got to, we had to, you know, we put up the phone on the little video camera. We're like, all right.

We had to teach him to, to tear the thing off, which he was like very ginger about. Mm-hmm. Right. Great Christmas otherwise. Very, very, very swell. Kids and angel. Though, he's two point something now. Pretty sure.

he got that two to three year old blast of testosterone because just the other day he looked at his mom when she said oh no you can't do that and he said the phrase you don't get to tell me no

oh no ah shit the shades come down thug life we're shaven now and page's mouth just hit the fuck Oh my God. Combined with too bad. Yo.

Well, so here's where we're at, right? Just the bullets in the gun are you don't get to tell me? No, and too bad right now. There are three bullets. Get ready for this. We're also in the phase. His speech is very, very good enough to ask for anything that he wants. So he walks up to me and he says,

Dada, can I please watch Henry ride the horse seat? He is talking about Henry of Scalots of Kingdom Come Deliverance too. Oh. Because I will play maybe half an hour of it with him a day and I will narrate what Henry is doing like riding a horsey or helping the man fall asleep or buying things at the store, etc. And he will every single day be like, oh, I want to see Henry ride the horsey. horsey. However, however, we are now in the phase of

nah man, you already saw Henry ride the horsey, but I want to. That is the phrase that comes out of his mouth. But I want to. And then I go, no, and he throws himself to the ground and goes, ah!

Okay. So a memory is specifically unlocking of my mom and my brother laughing and or and or like mocking because whenever I got mad as a kid I would go but I need it but I need it and I'm like oh shit that's that's unlocking right now I used to get teased on that when he does it it's like so I can see how like a emotionally immature

like agro shithead parent would see this and go oh they're disrespecting me right but like it's instead we have the opposite problem where me and page have to like put our hands over our mouths and like because i'm i'm like trying not to like burst out scream laughing because when a tiny little person just goes throws themselves to the ground and then they're like their faces in the carpet yeah yeah and then they look at you and they see that you're looking at them they stop for a second they freeze Like back to it It's so funny That's real anguish

That's real anguish Damn KCD of all games Also There's a million little things That are like Oh I really wish you Would stop doing this

Because it's really funny So I buckle him into his car seat Right And then I get into the car And you know what he yells to Mommy Mommy my seatbelt is not good My seatbelt is not good And I'm like

No, it is. And he goes, no, it's not. You can't. Come on. It's bad enough holding the paranoia down as you recheck the straps and retitened the things and check the levels on all three sides and go, it's in place. You're secure. Only to have him yapping going, nah, fix it, though. Oh, man, it's, it's so funny.

Don't eat that. You got to be strong. You have to be stronger than a small child's will. Don't need that. Which is pretty easy. But still, yeah, I know it's the best. It's the best. No is just a shot to the heart and you collapse on the ground.

And then like, hey, are you mad at Deda? Yeah. I'm mad at Dada. Crazy. Can I get a hug? No. Okay. Okay.

So question. Because right now, Right now, whenever there's been a tough day, whenever she's having a big, big scream cry, like, it's still the kind of day where with like a little bit of time later, maybe next nap cycle, we're getting smiles again, right? Oh, he can't, he can't keep it together for more than 20 minutes. So that's the thing. Or it's like at what, at what point does, yeah, when does, when does, like, when do things start staying with you? because you can also like just distract him out of it with like enough tickling or like like a like a odie chump or like a glass of milk or you just knock him right out of it um but he's got to learn how to deal with

his big feelings so he doesn't grow up emotionally stunted i will say that um going going over to the the christmas family meet dinner i also did learn some tech because some parents who'd been around longer were able to just grab kid punch girl and just like do some moves that she was like yeah and I was like how did you she loved that immediately she went super straight to like yeah and I'm like I need all this tech so we got some

airplane moves and we got some like mirror liens and some some new shit and I just had to watch other people like because I'm being stupid we're all being stupid but we're being like stupid in your own way you know and I'm like okay but some stupid's are more successful than others. So you can be stupid in the way that's like, and like that might get a reaction sometimes. But like this one with the, wow, seems to get a more consistent one. So do that. So like by the time, my guy was out of the infant phase was when I realized exactly how durable he was at every step of the process.

So if you've already got, gone through it, you can be like six months old. Yeah, we can do flips. Yeah. Or whatever, you know. Yeah. As long as you got there. Neck supported. No, I do remember, you sent me a photo that looked like you were mid-Hara-Korana. He was just wrangling around. I'm like, damn, he's moving. So, yeah, there's, there's, there's, there's, there's, there's, there's, there's, big excitement when gravity comes into play.

We also had a Christmas foible. So one of the presents we got the little man was dollhouse. Comes with three little dolls and like a pool and like, you know, whatever, right? And he was like, oh, man. my god, a dollhouse. You didn't say, oh my God. But wow, a dollhouse, right? And we did not realize it.

But the dollhouse had buttons on the inside that you would press them and would make a bunch of flashing lights and music come up. Okay. And so at first he played with the dolls. And then he discovered that. Yep, yep, yep, yep. And he sat there and pressed the fucking button for like 35 fucking straight minutes. And we're sitting there watching him and going, oh, fuck. this. And on top of that, here's my favorite part. On top of that, there was a button in the fake

little kitchen. I didn't know what it was. It was a tablet. And he clicked on it and said, let's look up recipes on the tablet. And I'm like, whoa, fuck that. Like a fake tablet? Yeah, like a little button, like a size of your thumb that was like in the shape of a computer. And you click on it. Here's fun things we can do with the tablet. And I'm like, oh my fucking God. Oh, my. Oh, my my god boy okay so as soon as he went to bed i crawled back downstairs got my screwdriver just taking all the fucking batteries out of this fucking thing oh oh the following day i had the he was like oh what what i'm like oh the bad the dollhouse must be tired wait it had sounds and a screen like an actual screen no no it was it was a fake screen it was like a but it was just a button okay

okay okay okay okay okay okay okay kitchen table at dollhouse so something we learned i i remember i remember hearing this years ago for the listeners is just if you hate parents that are in your life give them a gift that makes noise lots of noise that give a child's gift that makes noise to people that you hate yeah um so like i saw his like dopamine activity start to change within like five minutes of oh fucking with this thing man yeah yeah hey man do you want to play rainbow ball not even a response just click. Mm-hmm. Like, okay, fuck that.

We got one. We got, we got, we got a noise making a toy for, for the baby as well. And there's definitely that thought of like, did someone else give you a thing that makes a lot of noise and you're just kind of like, you're just kind of sliding it over this way in a way? Is that a, is this a convenient repack, you know? But yeah, at least the volume on it is pretty low, admittedly. but you need to, I imagine, be careful with those because we have a couple noise making Fisher Price little things going on, but we're in control of those.

Yeah. You know, and you can limit that. We disabled the dollhouse's extraneous features, and so I had to explain to him that the dollhouse was tired. And I'm like, why don't you talk to your dolls? And so I got to see him pick up one of the little dolls and start explaining to the little doll that the dollhouse is tired and doesn't make any noise anymore.

And I'm like, yes, this. This is better. This is what the thing is for. This shit, this tech, you've, like, the whole thing you've been describing with inanimate objects being tired is fucking genius. This is brilliant shit. Because literally all inanimate objects, when it's time to put them away, it's because they're tired. The TV is tired. Whatever is tired.

Anything is tired. And he needs to charge. Just give it to them at 4%. Oh my God. Great. What else? We also got him something called a Yoto, which is a tiny little baby radio

that they put little cards in and can select their songs. And like he loves that thing and he will like set it to the song he wants and sit there and listen to music. And he's like bob in his head and stuff like that. And it's like, okay, this is a good interaction with technology. This is not, I'm going to hit. the rat drug button for 40 minutes. Yeah, it's weird to look back on our shit and be like, oh, well, this was better or whatever. But there is something that is less threatening about passive tech versus hit the button dopamine response.

Gotta use your brain. Swipe, exactly, da, da, da, da, da. Like the idea of this was on in the background or the radio was on in the background, whatever's going on. is like, yeah, it's a passive thing as opposed to, you know, input. Yeah, so the biggest problem is like with your iPad is that the actual use of an iPad is inherently stimulating. Like literally moving icons or hitting icons is inherently stimulating. Interesting. Okay. Because I'm thinking about like a Kindle or something, you know, like early on in.

A Kindle? Because it's fucking, it's a book. I mean, they need to be able to read. Yeah, no, this is what I say, obviously this is. into the future. But like, I feel like, you know, you start there as a slow-ass fucking screen that doesn't animate at any kind. And you have a little e-reader and you go through books and shit and that would be fine. But in any case, yeah, the battery's coming out because shit is tired.

Right out. Right out. And like, as I'm watching him, he's like two and a half. And I'm like, there are children that I have seen this age. at a restaurant. Full size iPad. And I'm like, that's fucking crazy.

Do you not notice that the kid just deactivates the first time you give them the iPad? Like, that your child's soul just leaves their body immediately? It is, it is heroin. It is heroin. You got to, yeah, save that for situations where heroin is needed.

There's no other, there's no way out. Yeah, the only time is, hey, a plane. You can't leave. You can't get away. You're surrounded by people. And then they learn, well, the only time I get this shit is on a plane. And a plane is a weird scenario that never comes up. You can't be soothed in transit.

You can't be, you know, whatever. There's literally nothing to be done. There's literally nothing to be done. Yep, yep, yep, yep. So many of the chat just says, they're 13 cousins are all iPad kids. bro i want to see a picture of your christmas that's wild shit

but yeah i i holidays okay i did see like there is a a definite i saw a video of like hey look santa left some footprints behind from the presence there's like or it's like i think they're leading this way and it's like there's some snow in the house and then the kid walks over leans down this is baking powder and you're just like

that's a weird confluence of intelligence and whimsy and like yeah no the kneel down the analysis and the immediate no uh and it's like that that kids go in places

that kids go in places you know and they're just like ah ah you know good I love that solid aside from the holidays what do you've been up to man Okay, so we're learning about clapping.

What else? Got to watch. I've been meaning to get around to it, but one battle after another. I heard good things about that movie. I have no idea what it's about. It's good. I have no idea what it's about. So the trailer is very deceptive for what it actually is.

Because what you see in the trailer is Leonardo DiCaprio being this goofy, like, revolutionary dude and he's trying and then he going and he meets up with Benicio del Toro and you're like, what, what is going on? And he's trying to, he's trying to, you know, be like a, again, like a, um, he's trying to be a fighter and a political power in a move, but can't remember things. And he's just kind of a comedy, like, it's kind of a goofy bit. And then they just list all the actors in the movie and then the name of the movie and they're out. Um, the actual film is a super goofy version of taken

that you're watching it is a it is a it is a Paul Thomas Anderson ass version of taken and it is also

about awful parenting and it is not at all what you think those trailers are about it's very good it's very very good it's full of you know

wacky characters you know the good Paul Anderson doesn't doesn't show up often, but when he does, he makes some good films. Not that other Paul Anderson. Not the other Paul Anderson.

No, no, no. It's all about the T. We're not pushing Jovovich for SummerSlam in any of these movies. Miela Joevich's husband. Anderson, no. We're pushing, instead of Mila, we're pushing Tiana Taylor, who is ridiculously hot, super, super solid in this. She's the pregnant.

the woman in the in the trailer shooting the AK off fucking just she's great also just yeah being being like

the 10 on 10 version of what her type of character is supposed to be like what you're aiming for you're nailing it extremely well and she's someone that initially I was like wait who is that for a second I was like oh that's the person

who you might recognize from, can we get much higher, so high. Oh, oh, oh. She sings the second part of that. Oh, okay. Yeah, yeah. But she is a solid actor and does a great job in this crazy role alongside Leo. And, yeah, I mean, I don't want to, you know,

there's not much else to say besides, like, jump on that and go see it. It's really goofy, but great. And has a lot of like, has a lot of, uh, it's, the, the parenting aspect of the film is, uh, timely for us right now, I'd say. Yeah. Yeah. It's quite timely to be, to be watching that. So it's, you know, I'm really glad that I didn't have a child during the era in which everyone in video games had a child and discovered that having children is

oh like that that air that fucking zone of everything around last of us around 2009 was so fucking embarrassing are you oh my god are you saying children are people

oh okay okay okay okay I thought you were saying the best reason to have kids is as a because they're a media enhancer for a second no it was like this weird fucking moment where we like we like

whiplash from you need to protect Lara to oh my god if you had a daughter you protect her it was so fucking obnoxious and embarrassed remember the sad dad years but that's also I mean we just touched on this

but that's the thing I liked about buddy where it was just like fuck off me man just back up with that shit you know you know it's it's it was a full-on era dad slop

I don't I don't think that's going to take off I think that has way too many well it's coming it was the word of the year it was the word of the year and the year is over so you know I don't know if we can squeeze one

it at midnight not even not over yet pop slop has has more legs to it though I will say it just because it rhymes that automatically travels. That moves a little bit better. Rolls off the tongue.

Slops off the tongue. No. No. Hey. On the rip cord on this. What do you do with your week? Hey, again,

it's a, it's a good word. It's a good word. Um, we, uh, yeah. So yesterday,

I started up, Arkham City. I saw. Mm-hmm. I saw. And I was like, really, first of all, great choice of them, of, not thumbnail, of, of, of, of box art. Yeah. Yes. Yep. That's one of the, the, ugliest fucking box art. One of the, one of the only things I knew about this game for years is I can't believe that's real. That box art is the worst one ever. And it wasn't a good box art before all that shit either. And no, I, but I, but I, just remember the white, high contrast, you know, thing beforehand. But like also when you're looking up that particular game of the year, 10 on 10 Arkham City Box Art, you're getting different versions, including one with the fucking Harley Quinn

Extra Stide Story little thing, Dante from the DMC series. Like it's so obnoxious. Which one of these is real? I can't even tell. Fucking crazy. That game really represents like so much of the industry at that time. It was the seventh genus video game of all. Of all, right? 2011. It's excellent. 2011 deep in, for a lot of people, it's the beginning of their, for a bunch of people listening to this, it's their first game that they played to completion, I'm sure. You know, there's a number of people that are like, they got their Xbox 360s and then jumped on that, not

not even on our asylum, mind you. A lot of people's first experience with Chivo's. Yes. Going hard on Chivos. And Derriddler. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. I can see that. I can feel that going into it. And yeah, and I definitely, you know, lots of, lots of fun speculation on why now, is this a spite through or is this a pick based on me checking absolute Batman? And the answer is this has been on the slate for a while. I've been meaning to come back to this pretty much right around now. I was waiting for. for an excuse after the next thing. Night is like not mandatory, but like city kind of is. So what everyone seems to talk about is like you start the series so that you can play city and then Origins is what I ever get from everybody. Orisons has issues and the issues are is that it's like kind of buggy. Hmm. Okay. I mean, I know that I'm traveling back in time when I'm playing these games. And Knight is there if you're like, need some more. Don't care if it's not quite as good as the

others need more of it. Gotcha. Gotcha. Okay. Um, yeah. So, I mean, all in all, um, just, you know, one session in going in. I can definitely see that, uh, even though, so one thing that's, I remember this game in the office and all I remember is Batman flying through, through the city, right? Just zip and lining around and doing his thing. Which is an optional thing, which is crazy. Oh, the fact that you don't, you don't have to get those upgrades. Yeah, the upgrades for Like to go from like flying pretty good to like flying? Yeah. Side mission.

You don't need that. Interesting. So I just remember seeing a bunch of that when people were testing it in the office. And it was like always like, oh yeah, this is a cool thing where your answer to cool Spider-Man two swinging is to have fun traversal through the city of Gotham as well, whereas Arkham Asylum was a smaller environment and more linear. This is an open thing. It's just funny because it's like it's fun to move around and fly and do all that stuff. It's not what Batman does. Like he...

It is when... Okay, you know, you see him grapple away and you never see him do any. That's what he's doing. Yeah, but then he gets in the car or the jet or some other vehicle and books it, you know? Like, he doesn't actually spend... Like, Spider-Man is swinging throughout the city. You're completely right. And that's why they added the car to Arkham Knight.

And the overwhelming response to that was like, fuck, go back. Yeah. No, so it's cool. It's fun to do. But it's definitely like, he's not... going halfway across the city just doing flying gliding and grappling like he is getting in vehicles you know but it's cool though um it is cool though i really man arkham city starts off really well i like that like the very first like real thing is like you want to fight like 50 guys

like they drive me to that courthouse like no you're going to learn right the fuck now you're going to fight like 50 guys yeah and it and it is interesting because um you know this is um um you know this is, uh, so all, I, what I can say is with the, with the combat here is like, yeah, I think I'd definitely getting it, you know, a bit more. Um, there's still like, there's still some, some, uh, a proper full on super comboing to learn and stuff. But with the basic kitten and everything going on, uh, I have a better understanding of it now. Oh, I'm so sorry for hitting that microphone, everybody. Um, sorry about that. I'm, I'm, I'm moving this dog around in my, in my bosom. Mm-hmm. And, um, um, I can see that the, yeah, the whole, like, it's got the whole snappiness thing to it, which is the exact opposite of, like, free-form, loose combat in, and, like, full control systems are in different games and stuff. But I can see that, like, what they're going for is, and I, and I, towards the end of asylum, I think I started to understand a little bit more, but, like, what I can fully get now is that what they're going for is Batman is not panicking in a room full of enemies. he's calm and collected. And so you're not mashing and going crazy. You're actually calmly dealing with the situations and perfectly timing things to be one after the other threat annihilated in almost like concentration meter kind of way.

You know, it's like be calm in the middle of this overwhelming situation, which is the Batman thing to do. I want to say something about so the family actually watched a little bit of your LPD the other day when you're in the, church. Oh. With, with, with, with, uh, with, uh, first of all, I did, this is like the most woolly thing ever did not know the dog, the, those guards had that much dialogue. Yeah, they kept yapping. It was crazy. Like, it really shows off like the difference between me and you because the inst, like the frame that Y button appears on the screen. Blah! And, oh, yeah. They have like, multiple minutes of dialogue. And I saw people going question mark, witty, are you there? What are you doing? Hello? And I'm like, there, there's content here. This is

great. There's lots of talking all over the place with the bat, the boss, you know. The second of which is that you got, during that sequence, you got a high Uncle Woolley. Hey. And then he also went, hi Batman, which, okay, cool. Cool. But then I want to say, I'm very proud of you, Willie, because you, you fought off the temptation that I'm sure was very strong. because those games have an arcade mode

that you can just go in and just like just play fucking 15 hours of the combat with fucking no sake. So I skimmed back to the courthouse fight and I'm like, I wonder if he's going to be super good at this combat. No, he's normal good. He did not take the coward's way out

and walk in just like, yeah, I'm just super good at this. I'm just so excellent. A plus at the Arkham City combat. Oh, by like super labbing for the last two years? Yeah. Oh. I was really good at it.

I was really good at it. Like, yeah, yeah, no, it's like, it just like, you could do that fight with like an 80-second combo multifier. Yeah, yeah, yeah, okay, I guess I really just fell into it. Right. And that temptation would be high. Yeah. No, what I wanted to know was what I didn't get the first time around, which was just like, is it, um, is it, is like, there's the whole like, it's a rhythm game comment or whatever and stuff and all that.

But that part aside, what, um, the, the idea of just kind of like, you, there's, the comparison initially, whatever, we don't have to go fully into it, but like, um, when it gets compared to like, Susima, Spider-Man or Assassin's Creed and stuff, is that, like, in those games, like, I- There's no timing element at all. No, there isn't. And it doesn't also lock your skills behind your high combo count. You know? So like it does let you kind of just mash to your heart's content until the next thing you want to do is possible, you know, like a dude's coming at you when you're doing one thing and you're like, oh, just mash the counter and then you're fine. No, you want to be chill. Exactly. You know. And I would say so what I would say is that like this is the first time I've encountered this type of combat in anything I've played. You know. And so it's weird is that you have, but since it's the first one, you actually played all the like spin off variations. that we're like, no, let's get rid of the timed presses or this or that or there's a particular like enemy counter in Arkham City that is never been repeated in any game. And it's, it's because it's weird. Interesting.

Because like I'm also thinking because Dead as Disco has come up as like, you know, I played the demo for that the other day and that's like full on musical rhythm to it. And you're not actually doing music note hitting in Arkham. Yeah. But also in Dead as Disco, maybe, so yeah, there's the no-trot element of it. There's a couple of elements of mashing to it. But I would still say that like this one where it's like it's not actually rhythm. There's just a timing to things that you have to kind of internalize. Yeah, because like Batman will travel different distances depending on who you're aiming at. And it's actually just like throw down your next punch as soon as your current punch connects. So the timing is going to vary between every single attack. Exactly. And furthermore, you can mash in Dead as Disco. And any game where you can mash is automatically not like this. You know, this is the first-

I think ironically enough, the game that's like the most similar to like Batman combat in style is like High Fire Rush. Yeah. Huh. Okay. Because High Fire Rush actually does have like the timing thing and the way that the dodges work on the beat. And when the combo gets dropped, you can't do as much.

100%. There is a more similar thing to that. But yeah, any game that's like a, you know, superhero type of game where you're, or like you're one versus a crowd and your snap. mapping to your enemies. That's a surface level comparison, but it's not getting into the ins and outs of like what I was expecting versus what I got, you know, looking at it now. What I can't say, and I mean, that's the same mistake, of course, that like initial, like after playing Spider-Man, for example, like going into the first asylum trying to do stuff like that. Like I was like, oh, it doesn't work that way.

What I still need to, you know, get a better grapple on, is the detective mode. detective mode stuff because like... I fucking... It's so funny. The detective mode shit in those games is so funny because they wildly

overdid it in the first game by making it like the best thing to keep on it all the time and every single game is their attempt to like okay let's figure out to get them to turn it the fuck off sometimes. Oh, I don't mean the vision, sorry.

I mean the encounters, the stealth encounters, right? Oh yeah, yeah. Detective vision. Way harder than the than just fucking fighting a bunch of dudes. Yeah. So detective.

vision, in my heart, I want to leave it on a lot to see the threats and make sure I can avoid them as much as possible. It's better. But I remember how much people hated the fact that I kept it on that much. So I'm like trying to remember to turn it off more. If you're not playing, it looks like visual garbage. I can imagine. It was and it was something where like, whenever there's a like, yeah, highlight the threats better mode. I'm like, great. This helps me not get caught as much and do a better job of a lot of things. But yes, it is something that I remember getting complaints about. So I'm keeping that in mind.

It's a problem that you saw like, I saw like 50. I played almost every game that had fucking detective mode in that era. And like every single one tried a different thing of like, hey, this makes the game look like shit. But you're stronger. Like you're objectively stronger. So like you ended up getting things like Witcher 3, which like zooms the camera in and slows Garald's to like a walk speed and you have to hold the button. Like,

like just anything to make sure people don't spend. You don't use it the whole time. Yeah. Okay. So yeah, the predator missions or predator encounters. Those are the ones where it's like, okay,

so yeah, you go up, you jump over to the first person and then you string them up, you know, almost like a Spider-Man type of thing, you know, when you're undetected. But then after that,

the temptation to be like, and now I'm going to take that guy down and then beat the guy next. someone. It's like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. You can't do that. Like, you drop on, you drop on one dude. That guy's going to start shooting you because they all have guns. And also, one drop is not enough to take a dude down permanently. So all you do is set your alert off, you know? And so that's where I'm still trying to figure out, like, I know that sometimes you have setups where you can drop under the cage or go behind the wood, for example. After that first tutorial, I haven't seen any other, like, pull the dude through the wall things. Basically, every time you get, like, a new gadget, they'll have a moment of, like, check. out what you can do with this new gadget. And then every now and then you'll have like a boss white that's like essentially a test of the new ways you can use your new thing. And so I'm not.

And so like the other thing to do is experiment with like, will they, can I throw batarangs for noise and then they'll walk over to it or something? Like because they group up around the first dude that's hanging. And then you kind of are like, oh, do I just have to wait for your natural pattern to get some more vulnerable? You know, um, so I'm still, I'm still, you know, feeling out the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, fastest ways and most efficient ways to take on those encounters. But yeah, no, and I guess the other thing too is it does feel like, you know,

some of those initial combat upgrades, like you want, like, it doesn't feel like you... Should have been part of your fucking kit. Your default kit. Like, there's stuff there that, like, you can't really get going until you have it. I can see that now, you know, the bonuses and the free flow stuff. So it does that a little bit. in the first game, I think you had to unlock the takedown. Oh, okay.

I can't remember, but I feel like you did. And then you start here. And I like when you have a series like that, like you think about Kiryu in like Yakuza 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6. Where like more and every game more and more moves become part of the default kit. Like, yeah, he lost, you know. Yeah. Tiger Blow.

You can't start the fucking game with that. But, you know. And there's less explanation, you know, going in. into the sequel, of course, too. Like, like, nowhere, like, you get tutorials for individual moves that you just bought, for example, but at no point in this starting sequence, do they actually go, okay, so here's how the combo system works, for example. You just, you're thrown into it, you know?

It says hit wide a counter and you know. Yeah. So the whole thing about getting closer to, like, high combo count and then seeing, like, oh, now you're free flowing, you're moving faster. And, like, you're starting, I'm starting to see those like red trails on the attacks that are just like going boom, boom, boom. for just a second, you know, and choosing when to cash out on your, your takedown and stuff is just like part of the, the experience that you're supposed to, you're meant to just

figure out, you know? Starting to see that, though. That's, that's, that's cool. I, for, like, overall, I will say that, like, for that whole, you're Batman in the middle of a room full of enemies, you're supposed to be calm thing. That's why that works, like lore-wise for the gameplay. in most of the cases I prefer like a completely open

free form action scenario but I but like because it's Batman you know I get I get like why this works yeah that combat system was built around like the fantasy of being Batman Mm-hmm mm-hmm And seeing it picked up for a bunch of games

that don't feature Batman is really funny Well again like Spider-Man can just flail and web and go nuts on people Spider-Man's like a really good example because you have to do that but you also have to make him like three times as fast because he's fucking Spider-Man. Yes. Yeah, yeah.

So that's cool. We'll continue there. Fucking sucks that every single element of those Arkham games as a whole music-wise is poison for L-Ping. The first time around that whole thing, like Min had to try to work on how to get the music out. This time around it's just like, all right, we'll just, it is what it is.

I looked into it and then I was like, wow, I'm going to have to spend as much time doing this as recording the fucking thing. I might as well just blow through it and just move on. Trying out, there's a feature that is remove audio, but remove, not mute, but

remove music that's on YouTube. Testing it out, I'll see what the results are there. I'm sure it works really well. The preview seemed like it was working, so I'm going to commit those changes and see what happens. But yeah, otherwise you basically get these like instant demonetized for the whole Arkham series. Fucking sucks. Goody. Um, okay. So some guy, I'm sure. Some guy owns this track.

Courtesy of some bullshit. Every time. Yeah. Prior to that, uh, going through Expedition 33, getting to, uh, the end of act two. And, uh, Just a note as we go through this that it's really interesting going along and watching how. So with, yeah, with Reggie, he's going through it. He's just on the ride, right? He doesn't really like go for like the guesses or the plot gun shit or all that overthinking stuff that, you know, I go for in things. And you just let it take you there when the time comes. But I do kind of realize that I'm like, oh, like, the part of me that does that, it also makes me enjoy a media more when it works out.

It doesn't always. But sometimes what it does, I'm like, oh, like doing that, for example, with Eldon Ring, right? Yeah. That happened to work out. And so paying attention to like, what is Destin Death? What is Maliketh? What's the, you know, and then when- There's a big difference to get to the Eldon Ring and going, who the fuck is?

is this guy. Oh! Yeah. Like there's a huge difference in feel of that, which is something that happens in a lot of those Souls games. Like, are you surprised by who's at the end? Or are you like, ah, okay, I was expecting you. Well, so when Huaralu walks out and you're like, oh!

Because you've been following the breadcrumbs to that. It's a pop, but it's a pop if you ate breadcrumbs, you know? Yeah. Even looking at the intro going, wait. So far we've checked everything off this list except this one, you know. So those are moments that I'm like, that makes me enjoy whatever the media is a whole lot more. But sometimes it's just like, okay, you just got to let it take you there, you know. But in this case, so like we're walking through the monolith, you know, and those black and white scenes are happening.

And I remember for me, I was like, oh shit, context. Oh, shit. You know, and I was looking at each of them and trying to piece it together into what I knew. And Reggie's like, wow, cool robot. Let's move. You know? And picking up the little, the voice thing where, like, you know, you get the one for Aline, for example, and it describes parts of the relationships. And I'm like, I'm trying to piece together who was in that scene of the black and white and how that fits into the thing she just said and who she could be talking about to go, oh, maybe this is this.

And like, this is like, yeah, no, we're just riding. They're like, okay, we'll get there when we get there, you know. And it's like, it depends. because like some games Exposition 33 is a game that will tell you Yes It'll tell you it'll get there and it'll be obvious Yeah for sure

And but some games is just fucking don't And we've played a lot of games that just fucking don't tell you shit Like I still remember beating Dark Souls 1 And linking the flame and being like what? Why? Okay Did I win? But there's stuff that like

I say things like walking into Siren and seeing what everybody sees. Like that hits nice and strong when you're catching up on those conversations with everybody on the team. You know, you're like, oh, fuck, there they are. You know, that's a big moment.

It is interesting, though. So, anyway, yeah, we're working our way through that. So I've been thinking a lot about how, like, you know, French folks, like, how do they get through the game without getting spoiled with the lyrics, right? only to like very recently find out that like one of the first songs in the game is in English and I didn't fucking look at that at all yeah I didn't even tag it as English yeah um are you thinking of the man who uh I forgot the lyrics but no I'm thinking of linen and

cotton okay the the the song that that plays when you enter into of the spring meadows and you can see the indigo tree like right okay okay yeah so it's in english I'm like listening to it and I'm like I can catch like one word because alice du paul's uh percée's fucking

the accent is so thick and like she's operating operating it and like I'm wait and the thing is this too is like there's a couple of them that are like holy shit it's right in your face that I'm waiting that I can't wait to tell them about.

But currently... I doubt he'll hear it. At all. And I only caught it after the fact, too, right? So right now, there's some really good ones that are like, it's right in your face. There's the biggest one of all. And it's like, there's the biggest one of all. And I'm just like, we got to wait the whole game till this one comes out.

But, yeah, it's just, it's not even a thing. It's not, it's background, you know? And they do it in a really, they do it in a really good way because, like, It helps when you're intermixing French, English, gibberish, Latin, all of it, you know? I think there's a really genuinely genius thing going on with the game's lyrics in that the first vocal song you hear in the game, Lumiere, is like almost entirely gibberish. And your brain gets trained. And it teaches you that like the lyrics are either a language you don't understand or. It's all dim, dim, dim da, da.

It's the language I don't understand. Parisian. Exactly. So stop. So tune the fuck out, a hundred percent. You know, until like, yeah, then I'm just, my eyes are bugging out at each one of these, you know? I mean, I went to, I went over to, um, uh, uh, uh, uh, Poem d'Amou, like, like, right after because I was like, blown away by that whole sequence. But, uh, yeah, the whole, it's right in plain sight thing is, is.

fucking sick. I love that. And then there's the dispatch. So shall we put up the spoiler cast on this one? Do me a favor. Let me take a quick, quick piss. Okay. So we can spoiler cast this with empty bladders. All right. BRB.

All right. Let me just put a little text up there. All right. So now you can't even, now you can't even be, mad when you come in here and you're like, oh, I can't believe it. It's right there. You can just look up and says Dispatch Spoilercast. Spice Spoilercast at the top of the screen. Yeah.

All right. So, Dispatch Spoilercast. What a fucking excellent game. What a great game. What a great game. What a great TV show that has little video game bits in it. A little bit of a gaming video, yeah. So I'm, so here's what I'm going to say is like, I feel like, um, tales from the

Borderlands reminded me of what I loved about the Walking Dead Season 1, you know? And Wolf Among Us was really great too. You know, Batman, Batman was fun. Like, as time went on, I feel

like, I love specific parts of that more than like the overall journey compared to the others. But, you know, you kind of then have the shit that you completely forget about, like, Game of Thrones.

I don't think a single person remembered that there was a Game of Thrones telltale game that existed. I didn't remember until you just told me. There you go. Right. This is crazy because you would think that that would fucking crush it. So this is a strong hearkening back to Telltale season one and to Walking Dead season one. And it was fucking excellent.

So that those, that first. Um, solid bits, you know, I, I, I think, uh, I saw someone, I saw someone, uh, thinking that, because I was calling Blazer a sciop. I was calling Blazer a sci op. I was calling Blazer. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I would like to say, yeah, that I've been following little bits and pieces. Okay. Okay. What you said last week and also the side. The giggle, the growing in my chest. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. As I heard you just wax poetic about what a sci-op and how the secret agent, whatever. No, okay.

Blazer is, as you just like totally fell for what I would call an anti-twist. That is villainous piece of shit is actually human garbage all along. Right. Just the, he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-h in my chest, dude. So the, the reason why I bring it up is because, I think it's worth clarifying that when I'm going, she's a sciop. I'm not saying I think she's a traitor to the team that's secretly a villain. That's not what I was getting at.

I was getting at the, this is a like attractive, like hot girl that immediately is like showing up and like leaning in for the kiss right off the bat in a telltale style game. There will be humongous consequences right away for going with this. So she's the first thing you get in the episode one is like it's too, it's too much like it's too perfect, you know? There's no way that you're going to, you're going to lean into that and not have something blow up some way somehow in your face. That's, that's pretty much that. That's what I meant. It's bait. Because these games are meant to fucking come back on you in these moments.

But yes. I think the, um, in the end after seeing, did you play with QTEs on or off? I had to play with them on and was completely pointless. Yeah, okay. Because I saw the preview for what those were and it definitely felt like it would be detracting. I don't know. Completely pointless.

Nice that they were an optional thing that you could turn off. So that made for a better experience. In terms of control-wise, I did find, and this is just, I think it's a problem with like, again, it's another sort of setup thing. But like, I liked hacking with the controller and I needed the mouse to click on dispatch things quicker, you know? So, like, I wanted to use the mouse to get right, right as I'm waiting for that timer to just run out.

I want the mouse for those moments. And then I want a controller to go through the grid. But I think having a keyboard would help you go through the grid just fine as well. But I'm on the couch. So we're in that situation again, you know. I controllered my way through it and didn't. I think I had like two misclicks. Okay.

Throughout the eight episodes. But I was pretty fucking mad when I got those misclicks. Yeah. I was really like there was a couple of them where I was like on trying to get a just frame answer the call. You know? Come on, man. Because somebody else is about to come off of. Well, that's real life.

You're trying to spread yourself too thin. Right. And it worked out. I did manage to with the mouse get a couple of clutch calls at the last possible second, you know? Um. So, yeah. Overall, I think I think the worst

one I had was like two botched calls and like one miss or so. So overall they went more or less okay. So if you did quite well on it, that means you also had the experience that I did where you just completely missed out on like a very cool experience during the final dispatch.

Oh, if you fuck up? No, if you do too well. What happens? so on the very first on the final dispatch oh so you got on the final dispatch if you're crushing it blonde blazer never shows up oh okay no i wasn't crushing it that hard then oh god damn it what the fuck i stop that's so that was what i was describing to you a couple weeks ago where i'm like cool i skipped part of the final boss again oh dude i i was like mud mud muddling through the dispatch calls and the only one i I truly crushed was the last one. It turns out that's the only one in the whole game that has a cool event. It's so hype. It's so hype when it happens.

Yeah. And especially because she's coming off of that amazing scene in the bar. Oh, it's the best scene in the whole game. She's so good in the bar like, damn. Like you have that moment of shroud being like, okay, now that's a fucking superhero. Like, you got to give it up. Um, yeah, that was that was fucking great. Um, and, uh, uh, uh, uh, what was I gonna say? Yeah. So there was, uh, the, the overall. So this is one of those things to were, again, replacing walking around the office with like this little like management time thing or whatever. It's so much better decision. So much fun. Yeah. Um, I would actually prefer like, uh, like an endless mode or some, some shit with this. Mm-hmm. something arcade mode i definitely yeah i definitely thought about like i was like i wouldn't mind

going back in right now and just getting a couple more for sure that was that was cool um so i'm yeah i'm curious about some of the places where we we departed on our choices because i'm sure you know there besides the obvious i'm sure there were some that like played out fully differently but i'm wondering if any of the choices were so different that we got entirely new scenes You know, is it the type of telltale situation where, like, because I was, for example, wondering, I was like, oh, if you choose to go to the date with Phenama Man and Blazer, do, does a location change occur that you otherwise don't get to? No. And then I found out no, because. That was my first question.

Yeah. That was my first question after I beat that episode. Yeah. And it turns out, no, because in the comics, you learn about what happened there. So I go, oh, they wouldn't have illustrated this if you would have access to that scene, you know? So you get the branches that ultimately still steer you back towards variants of the same scenes, it seems like. Yeah, no, because of the way that it's built, I really got the feeling that there wasn't going to be a massive amount of, like, actual divergence. Like, the diamond was at, the choice diamond was actually, like, much smaller.

And that what you would essentially get was, like, bits of scenes that were snipped or extended or have, you know, have. you know have coupe or there instead of Charlie I can remember his name I just called him Charlie the whole fucking sonar I called him Charlie too I call him Charlie too but sonar so so who did you go with on that one

Charlie oh you cut Charlie no no no no no no you catch Charlie you cut Coop okay okay you see turns into a bat and you do both that's crazy so for me it was strictly like I just put him through flight school

I just I just wasted a level up on him There's no reason for this to fucking Like for me And the way I was building my guys Like Coupe like I don't need another fast Attack hero I already have Flambay

Hmm Like that is like the exact same Yeah And I was like man fuck Flambay I don't want to use this asshole You know and it's like oh no He's super good He's actually like

Maybe the second best character in the game And he's high up on that list you know Hey, I mean, it managed to work until it was like, nah, you got to use him now. And the game was like, who's your MVP? My MVP was Golem. Yes, he was! Unstoppable.

He's so strong. Oh, my God. He's so strong. It's ridiculous. You pick the skill where he just fills the whole team. Fill the gap. Fill the gap. I didn't fail one mission in the entire game that I did that on.

It's unbelievable. It's so busted. It's so, so busted. Who did you go with for the new member? Oh, I went Phenoma Man. Oh, okay. I went Waterboy. I needed space alien Harry Dubois on the gang, man.

I needed it. I needed Project Giridos. That was we initiated Project Giridoz. You're right. That's exactly what he is. Yeah. He's another healer. You know, I built out his int,

because I didn't want Charlie to be the only one. He's straight up better. By the end of the game. You got to build them right, though. Yeah, I really liked Waterboy, you know, the whole time. But I think Joel Haver does a great job as Waterboy. Very happy to see Joel get like a proper video game acting credit. And I think the, not, I'm curious because I'm like cutting coop.

I'm like, how the fuck does the obvious payback then work out where you, have a goofy Batman, man bat, being intimidated. I assume man bats most of the time. I'm assuming he's got to be monster mode. Because, yeah, there's no way he can be intimidating in stupid, you know, fucking crypto mode, you know. But that was one of those moments, too, where, you know, when the time comes and it's like, okay, are we going to fire Vizzy? Right? No.

So that is like, they bring up a point. in that moment where it's like the you've cut people for less which is the classic telltale No, you did blonde You did bitch Exactly

The game puts it on you And you're like Oh fuck right Now it's got to come back on you And you got to eat that shit And everyone is like right For being like I didn't do that shit

So then you have to look at this moment And go oh shit Am I gonna be a hypocrite Because also the whole team Is against at this point and is well willing to make the cut happen. And you got to go, wait, hold on a minute, right? Yes, this is a ridiculous thing to, you're super a hypocrite if you don't fire her here,

but then you stand on what you did before. But that just means you fucked up before. And that was super, that was uncalled for, right? And so knowing that and calling that out right, right there, it's like a good preparation so that when it comes back on you towards the end, you're like, yeah, you should not have been fired actually. That was fucked up. We shouldn't have done that.

That was absolutely the wrong call given... I did not do that. I was like, guess I made the right decision, you fucking psycho. Nah, no, I looked at that as like, we were wrong for that. And this is crazy to then put this as the new standard, you know? Yeah. Um, so the, uh, uh, the bits in the, in the, in the second session, um, on the actual gameplay. I, I, yeah, so I started going really slow because I think the, um, the first time around,

I was trying to interpret those words correctly. And I made some initial wrong guesses. So I was like, okay, no, wait, hold on. What does this word actually mean? And in that, those dispatch sections took longer than they needed to. Um, yeah, and, you know, I ultimately am looking at them going like, okay, I can understand where some of this annoyance is coming from. Um, there's that. What? Hold on. Hold on. Let me make a threat about it. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. There you go. Did you make it. Um.

I did. Yeah. And then the, uh, then the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the one where I'm like, I'm looking at that situation going. I thought Flambay would like I thought the fighting with Flombe at this point would like fuck up the synergy I just misread what that actual decision was so how did it play out for you I told them and they all showed up at the next test

and they all took bets on whether or not it would blow up okay and then the scene at Robert's apartment made way more sense than it would have otherwise yeah because then Malavala is like she's standing there hearing the secret

and then going wait what afterwards. And like, you were right there. They didn't plan for this to be a part of the game. They clearly didn't expect that. Listen, Willie, all, all that needs to be said about telling people whether or not you are or are not hot Mecca Man is that sometimes it's not time to just talk. Sometimes it's time to just be quiet and lie. Again, I didn't, I looked at that as like this is probably not the, I looked at that in Like, not yet, because this could fuck up the synergy with the team

is all I thought, and misread on that. I definitely... I think you, like, overestimated what that game was, like, capable of. But I'm also... So, this is one of those bits where, like, again, you could jump into my brain for a second here, but, like, everyone going, like,

that's a lie where I'm like, is it? It's a lie of omission. Because I didn't... My definition. Because I was so surprised by everyone calling that a lie at all, because I'm like, that's not what that read as to me in the sense that like when I was looking at it my initial

when I was looking at it I was like oh yeah I don't want to fuck up the synergy right now like is what I thought and then the games play on that ends up being actually more sound in a way where it goes hey when you go I'm Robert you're you're trying to it makes a point to go hey don't dwell on the past it's about who we are now to a team of villains so it actually makes a better reasoning version of than what I was initially thinking. So it's complicated right. So the I'm Robert's speech is solid.

And in that exact moment, he is telling the truth. However, that truth is then reversed into a lie of omission in the first scene of episode 5 where he's back in the fucking suit trying to get it to work. And the thought, like,

it's this really weird thing where it's not a lie of omission when you make it. But the Next scene determines it to be a lie of omission because it means that Robert didn't actually mean any of that shit. And so, uh, and the, um, and then the other bit too is, yeah, again, like I heard what Vizzi said right before, but again, I just didn't, I just, I don't know. I wasn't piecing it. But I think like what I was going on, I was like, well, I know we're working on the suit in the background. So clearly this game is leading us to a place where he's not going to show up in the suit out of nowhere, but I'm definitely going to get back in the suit because there's enough breadcrumbs showing us that that's going to happen.

Because if this game doesn't end with me getting back in the suit. What the fuck am I playing for? It's a zero out of ten for being a piece of shit. So I know that's coming. So I'm just like, oh, should I blow up and have a fight with Flambay right now? No, let's, that's, that's, that's all that, that's, that I read that decision as right now. That, that's, I saw what I saw as. We had our bar fight.

Do I blow up and have a fight with Flambe? Could you fucking imagine? You know? Could you, I would imagine if you didn't get into the fucking scene. That would be psychotic. Um, so yeah, so there's that bit. Um, and, uh, there was the other bit where, um, the, yeah, so with Chase, like, that's a... I'm so glad that they realized how far in advance you could call that shot. He was explaining his powers in episode one. and why he was old.

And I'm like, this is going to happen. And then this is going to happen. And then this is going to happen. And then this is going to happen. And then all that shit happened. And then he survived. And I was like, oh, you actually got me. You actually, actually got me by just not following through on the most obvious possible thing.

You've got one run left. How are you going to use it? Yeah. And the timing on that, too, where, like, Because he, like, while he's making his point, you know, as a hero of sacrifice, right? You know, as you learn. Oh, yeah. I even called out what episode it would occur in.

Wow. Damn. Okay. Okay. Because it's, it's set up so obviously. Yeah. So he's somebody. And he has to have, you have to have the episode where everyone's sad about him.

Right. So he's, as somebody who's everything he did was sacrifice, like with those powers in his life. you get where he's coming from when he's like yelling at Vizzy, but like he's going way over the top. He's getting drunk and going out of pocket on it, you know? And that's where it's just like, dude, like not like that. So it makes sense though, because like he's a guy who was a proper real-ass hero. Yes.

For real. Yes. And he had his heroism ability taken from him due to like a fucking act of God level of circumstance. Yep. Meanwhile, he's dealing with people who are legit-ass career criminals who are given a second chance just to do it. Just to do it, right?

Exactly. So the weight he's carrying, where he's coming from, it makes perfect sense why he would feel that way and why he'd be like, nah, fuck these villains, though, right? And like that anger is coming from exactly where you described. Plus, when I, you go read the comics, which I only did afterwards, and you see. the death of Mecha Man, right? You're looking at a scene where because the original Mecha Man

looked at Shroud and was like, you don't pass the vibe check on being a hero. I just don't, you can tell, can't you? And then at the time, Chase was like, hey, man, lighten up. It's fine. And then it wasn't fine, right? So he's going to be like, oh shit,

the last Mechaman looked at Trowd and went, yeah, I don't feel it from him. He's still a villain. And he shouldn't be here. And then it backfired in his face and he lost his friend because of it. So he's carrying that, looking at Vizzi and anyone else that's a villain going, fuck you, you know, I don't trust you. He's still holding that.

So you know where that's, you know where that part's coming from based on reading the comics as well. You know, so I get where the dominoes fall into place and how they fall into place. But I'm still just like, I, just because I understand where you're coming from doesn't make the way you went about this. You know, getting loaded up and fucking going all in. But I understand how we got here. It doesn't make it okay, but I get it, you know? I think that final comic, the death of mecca man, does such a great job of re-contextualizing about the story.

What a bitch. So you mean what a bitch, dude. And Trout is like 10 out of 10 cool. Confidence. Robot fucking evil. Making calculations. Floak. Forge.

Calm, collected, knows what's going on, has all the moves. everybody's working from he's incredible and then you run into him in the bar and he's just some old guy and like it brings him down your level like he's just some fucking guy but then he puts all that shit on

and he tells the scary story about how he shot your dad and all this shit and then the end of the game and then you find out oh he's actually a bitch and he's a liar like every like that whole story about he shoots his dad

no dude You just came to a doorway and Yeah Takes the shot and then it fucking fumbles There's a there's a You know like Chase like fucking grabs him But it's not fast enough And then he can't out race the bullet

Complete bullshit And then you've got to tell that After the fact is how much of a badass You are your origin story is a villain You know And then it's and then also It means that hard ass mechacha man Was completely right

You did fail the vibe check You were a huge bitch and you fucking choked on one step one after not getting what you thought you wanted immediately like grab the gun you know it's amazing how the comic recontextualizes that shit um i love the the uh also the bit where um you know if phenomenon is your superman uh blazer is also not a superman therefore she's a shazam right she's a captain marvel uh or um yeah uh uh uh just i um yeah uh uh you juggernaut. Sure, whatever the case. But yeah. I got a magic rock.

Good bit there. The, yeah, there was that. There was a moment where the text messaging popping up on screen or things like that where I'm like, I'm just not reading fast enough. And I couldn't keep up and then like the wrong choice went through and I, you know, redid that. But that whole buildup. Yeah, even again, even for something where you're like stuff of this.

stuff in this is predictable and stuff in it is not. I just like, as far as the team of misfits go, it's just fun hearing their banter back and forth. And then when shit gets real, the obvious like, you know, bitch you're blind forever. Like the, like, like, it's so horrifying. It's so fucked up. Oh, she blind to me temporarily.

No. Bitch what the fuck you mean temporary? That's so horrifying. And that energy character. through on all those characters is phenomenal. Like, yeah, you want, um, you want a team of just like absolutely hilarious, goofy people like that, you know, to just spend time hanging out with. And, and you want to spend more time with them.

Like, that's why I'm like, I'd love a season two. You know, I'd love more of this and, uh, uh, to see where this goes. Because as a show, this would have been a fun show, but like, absolutely. But as a game, it's like standing out in the space, large louder than, an animated superhero show would have. I think it would have fallen back, you know, with other superhero shows and gotten compared to Invincible more so.

But it would have been a, you know, pit or miss, some people tune in, some people don't. Whereas as a game, it's like much more like, yo, go fucking play this, you know? I have one complaint and it's about Robert. Mm-hmm. Robert feels a little bit too much like guy with the drive jacket in his closet

like audience member like guy playing the game who imagines himself to be the new main character of Blade Runner or Drive or whatever Oh you mean the Western equivalent of a visual novel with a high school student? Yeah, he serves like a fucking Like a Western Isakai protagonist.

Oh, the most insert. Oh, you are Robert. We are Robert. Insert yourself into that. You're a normal guy that can pilot the mecca real cool. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

I feel it. I saw people saying this and I have difficulty fighting it. But it like Twilight for guys. It kind of hits. I like, I'm just a normal guy and all the girls. at the superhero agency, want my penis, and tell me about their sex dreams with me.

So we know... What? We know why these stories are told in this way and why this is a thing. I just wish, definitely, that more stories set up your cast the same way, but then just put the camera inside of someone else,

right? You're making archetypes, and then you're making them in relation to the main character, but then just make the main character someone else. That's a wild but fun choice to do. I love when things do that.

It doesn't happen often enough, you know? Let them, and he's, he is his own person with his own, you know, like bits. But yeah, I know exactly what you're describing as he walks in and everything just happens to him. There was, uh, uh, um, I fucking love me some double text. So the entirety of that last fight was was super dope. yeah. Everybody's working together. Good. Synergized. Perfect. And, yeah, then there was that, there was that last, that last choice with the, with the do-hicky. And I looked at it. So did you, did you give him both? Yes, it did. Okay, okay. I looked at it and was like, and I think I just auto-completed, like, give him and don't give him. And then there was the both up top.

And I went, we can't fucking risk beef. You can't risk any version of this playthrough where beef dies. That's insane. My mentality was unacceptable. My mentality was basically, I'm not going to risk beef. He's an adorable little guy. And I'm going to give him what he wants by the letter of the law. By the letter of the law.

Right, right, right. Yeah, it was a, it was, I, it was a, it was a, like, yes left right no type sitch there's a real nice thematic core to that where Mr. I know all the odds is forced to deal with the fucking pure coin flip and just

loses his shit right I know because yeah I heard about when you do that that like essentially the odds uh oh you got to you got to deal with 50 50 and what can you do about that um and uh yeah you create a new thread

exactly I mean look I'm going to yeah listen listen all I'm going to say there is they popped up and I saw and I got about as far as hey remember when Woolley told that story about the car accident where someone was driving and then they suddenly were going I told them they went past the wrong stop so they drove off and then they got into the car accident is it possible Is it possible that Woolley was lying and that he was the driver and that he was being indecisive and that's what actually happened there? The story of when you were like five years old? I was not five.

I was a teenager. But like, were you driving? No. No. So I just that like I saw I got about as far as that comment as did I lie about being the driver in the car accident story I told. And that specific level of insanity. I'm like, okay, that's a good time to just ignore that and go play with my daughter.

And I did. Wully, are you crashing cars and then making up stories to deflect from your bad video game choices? It is like that is the wild. It is, you know, as far as your straw man goes, that is the wildest most extreme insane. But I saw that and was like, good time, good time to go play with the kid. Yeah, I actually, I actually did see that. Oh, you did. Okay.

I did see that. And I started the stream that I was doing that day about like, hey, I have, I started off like this. like, hey guys. Can I add something to the woolly dispatch discourse? I have some complaints to make. And then I said, Uno reverse, stop it. You're all mentally ill. Stop being so mentally ill. Okay. Just, I'm mentally ill, but I'm not being this mentally ill. Because for, for every discussion, complete, whatever the feelings were, you know, from the range of valid to invalid, that was the most insane thing. I fucking ever. I was like, wow, we're at this level. Okay. Um, we're on the armchair.

We're fucking sitting behind me and we're, we're going into the childhood. But, um, anyways, that is, uh, a fucking amazing return to telltale style games after I skipped out on the final chapter of the last one. And, you know, telltale exhaustion was something that, yeah, I don't think we said, but I felt. And it kept me, I didn't, I just, I didn't play the last Clementine story. I don't know how it ends, you know? I also did not because that third season was terrible. It bums me out. I cared so much.

And I loved those characters. And Clementine is a really competent child character in these things. Was like great when she was great. But yeah, I just, I was so over it, you know, by the time we got here. So this kind of coming out and being a real fun return to form was was excellent. I fucking like that. I hope they are able to put out anything, anything more faster than this. because this game's been cooking for a long time.

Speed of rendering, I guess. I mean, you know, but also it's nice too that like, okay, because it's a critical role joint, like heavy emphasis on voice acting, on delivery, on subtitle colors, you know? Yeah. And I, and yeah, from what they said, essentially, they're going to be making the, a critical role project next, and they're currently discussing ideas for season two. so it would be a slam dunk i mean i just want to give a shout out to whoever the fuck wrote down uh in the same scene cardy c and nicky mirage that's fucking a plus yeah yeah that's great um again now to go back and see the uncensored fucking dongers and and cheeks out they're all over they're all over um you see they were like oh i wish we wouldn't have cut the sex

scenes. I'm like, what the fuck did you cut? This is the stuff that's in there. I definitely feel like, okay, for something that was going to be a show, it does, I guess it's not as practical to want different scenes or different massive variations on outcomes. It would have been nice, all kidding aside with the whole like, you get visie or blazer, pick one.

Like, it all, like, malevolia aside, it would have been nice if like that was a more open thing, you know, in general with the cast. You can also pick nothing. Yeah. There's that. There's that. And, yeah, again, I don't know if this is one of those cases where the more you look into it, the more you can see your choices don't fucking matter.

But I get the feeling probably, you know. There was somebody, I forget their name. I'm sorry, guy, but they were going through, I was Nita Furin. It was Nita forin. I remember. they were going through dispatch and line. Let's see what the fuck happens if you just fail every call. Mm-hmm.

Nothing. Wow. Silent Robert is not a weirdo. The only thing that happens is if you fail the hacking stuff with Vizzi, because that means you're not supporting her. Okay. And that points to the invisible, ha-ha, invisible girl fucking turns evil threshold.

Okay. Yeah. So once people explained to me that like, actually it's point thresholds and you do you do good and do bad and once you cross that threshold, you're going to be okay. I do say that that is, I like that better than you crushed it and then you made the wrong coin flip or you made the wrong binary decision or so. Of course, you know, following the themes mean you should be able to follow along and make the correct canon decisions, of course. But regardless, I do think that the threshold thing does work better for these types of games. But yeah, I guess a little more variation, you know, where possible on some of those things would be welcome. I had another complaint, but I forgot right now. They can only do like lots of variation when they're like, this is the last season. Right? Because then you have to stick with it afterwards and uh-oh. You have to have some push towards a cohesive hole. Then you get Mass Effect.

Yeah. Then you get the, uh-oh, the beginning of my part three is nothing like the beginning. of your part three. Yeah, so that was great. That was great. Fuck, I had one other thing that bugged me, but unfortunately I just don't remember right now, so that'll be it.

I will say the QTEs are terrible, except for one very specific QT in the bar fight. When they snap that dude's chicken lay, a chicken arm. Oh, yeah. Push in both sticks. Nice. To the center, and it's really good.

Solid, solid bit. Also shout out to, chair Golem and Glass the bartender Glass him Redux for Real Reels was wonderful

And the chair bit tells me I'm like They have This is so self-aware Right There's no way to look at that And be like

Nah That's just a coincidence Those two being Deliverately Like fucking Like joke misleading Is great Um

And glass them in particular Immediately into Oh it's not so funny anymore You know, like I was in the middle of laughing at Glassham showing up for real. And then, oh, no. Oh, uh, your shroud. Your final bit.

What do you mean my final bit? How did you finish him off and or what was your... Oh, I killed his ass. I strangled his shit. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And everyone was like really disappointed. And I'm like, nah, fuck that. No.

The ending slides are like, man, nobody killed shroud. even if they said they were going to. I'm like, y'all are Pussy. No, no, no, no, no, no. Had to go. Had to go. I didn't feel good about it, but he had to go. That's just, yeah, you don't. That, you know, the, the, you can, you can set up for your Batman rule. My tiny ugly dog. You can set up for your Batman rule here, but I'm just like, that does, this does not work. Nuh. And, um, also, what is the, what is the hypocritical? Because like a bunch of those people in that bar fight fucking died. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. And these villains on the, the Z-Z-t team has body counts, like for real, real.

Like, there are, there, it's quite clear, you know. You're seeing the bat fucking just munching on people. But yeah, no, like, you fucking, John Wick rules apply. John Wick rules apply. Did you get over here or,

or, um, spirit bomb? Oh, fuck. I did, I did the, the, the, the, get over here. What was it? I, uh, I, I fucking can't remember. Okay. The action scenes don't, don't, don't.

Don't register. Okay. I did the spirit bomb because I'm just like fucking get get Kameyamede, you know. But yeah, to get over here. Someone decided like it's a big punch or something to that effect. I was really, really, really bummed out that like Stroud's fucking master plan was I'm going to attack you with a big robot. After at the end of all things. Yeah.

Yeah. He's a genius. He's got everything figured out. You know what he's going to do? He's going to attack you with a bigger robot. Oh, fuck. Apparently, if you spare him, he, like, shits and pisses and vomits all over the place and slips in it. And it's just a huge, super embarrassing, the worst possible thing without dying happened to him type of fail.

So it's like, if you want a really, really dog, you spare him and you get to feel superior about that too. Or something to that? No, for me, it's not even about, like, being superior. it's a it's a oh oh you're you're talking about when you give him the 50 50 oh he chooses it wrong which is what happened okay okay okay and then each every single person attached to him starts vomiting all over themselves i see i see okay okay um yeah but yeah no i i didn't do it because i was like oh revenge for my dad or whatever i don't give a fuck about that i did it because like oh you you just have to go away forever i don't want to talk to you again you can stop existence

That's it. We're done. Cool. Damn it. I'm fucking, I'm scraping, but it's gone. Also,

he shot my girlfriend. Oh, my God. There was, that happened too. Oh, how about the fucking brunette blazer upgrade?

How about that shit? That is not a D power. That is an upgrade. I think, I couldn't. I thought it was so funny how she looks like almost exactly the same.

she just doesn't have blonde hair Super saying it's so funny Super Satan deactivated Yeah Yeah yeah yeah it's kind of amazing I thought she was gonna turn into like a mousy brunette With like fucking swirly glasses Not even

You know but it's just like Oh she's not like the blonde bombshell Oh more suddenly more attainable No Anyway that was I like I like that little bit With the gem as well that's solid So, uh, cool. All right.

That'll do it. And if I remember the other bit, I'll bring it back up. So it is now safe for anybody who didn't want spoilers to rejoin. All right. Woo. Spoilcast over. Uh, anything else going on with your weak man? That's pretty much it.

That was it. So, yeah, we will be continuing, um, Batman Arkham City, uh, Expedition 33. Uh, this weekend, I'm going to be checking. out Wanted Dead and Sushi Ben because sushi ban looks really cool. That's the game that looks like the world of Mega Man Legends. It's all vibes. And Wanted Dead is something that would have been a one-off mystery box-ass fucking LP back on the old channel. And people have said that, you know, we've been eaten too good for too long.

Reggie's only been enjoying good games, tasty morsels, and every once in a while you've got to dive in and experience some jank-ass bullshit. So I figure, all right, let's take a crack at it. Let's see how his commentary does under the pressure of a janky fucking X-y-ass game as opposed to an automatically good game. Because you can sit back and just be like, wait for the game to get good and do cool things. that this like first trailer on Wanted Dead has like no gameplay at all. It's just the positive reviews. So yeah, yeah. Like in the-

Oh, it's all cutscenes. Oh, it's all cutscenes. Oh, that's such a good sign. When you are playing a bad game, you have to make it entertaining. So let's see how this goes. And yeah, sushi band for the vibes. I got some other cool like one-off stuff I want to take a look at too. So I'm labeling this as checking out or checking out these games.

And I'll be checking out a few more things. So that's over Woolly versus on YouTube and on Twitch. It's funny that you mentioned eating too good because I am also going through my trash phase right now. I started up beat the backlog season two, which the last season took 18 months to complete. This is the next batch of 101 fucking things. Yeah. I mean, to be fair, like, I slop stream like a few times a year. It takes a minute to build that shit up.

So, you know, special events. So I decided to put my foot on the scale on this one a little bit. Mm-hmm. Because 67, sorry, 65 of the entries are from chat, and 33 of them are mine. And two of them are pages. So because I wanted to have the ability that if it landed on Pat, I could fucking jerk the wheel towards whatever the fuck I wanted the fucking show to feel like. Hey, has it been too good today?

Let's go, let's do some garbage. Has it been trash for like four hours? Okay, let's finish on something I know people actually like. So is the system? Because like, okay, I guess, because I saw the clip where like it landed on that Azina and I was like, oh, I thought you put the names of the games on a list. No. So here's the here's the way that it works. I'm like the the list is open. The rules are, hey, this is a significant cost investment to play hundreds of games for 40 minutes. Okay. So if you want your shit to run on the wheel for a unlimited or highly limited length of time, donate the cost of the game at the current time that you're kicking it in, usually during a steam. sale.

I then grab it. I put your name into a spreadsheet. I put the link to the game. I put the original cost, et cetera. Okay. And then I load it into a wheel of names.com. And then I fucking put every single fucking person's name,

including mine, according to whatever they were. Because what I don't want, so the first role was Dad Asana, right? Yeah, yeah. She somehow got the very, very first one. ragged. Yeah. And the last thing that I wanted

was for the game to land on 1,000 times resist. And then as I'm setting the game up, everyone's like, oh, no, I want to hit the title screen and game capture kicks on on the title screen. And people go, oh!

And then we're in it before people even get over their surprise. Okay. Okay. Gotcha. So it's a rolling ass start. thus you got to have the name up first and also you know who to name in shame. And so the person who has it, the person who has it, you know, gets to go, oh, that's me. That's my name, right? Instead of everyone kind of knowing what's going on. Also, it allows me to, because nobody has the list but me.

Nobody knows what's on that fucking thing. Right? So if I, if the wheel had it, they just take a screenshot and be like, oh, I'll check back in when. Grand movie Reelink is the episode So like the first hour Of a thousand times resist is like the school I guess Yes so I actually did

90 minutes of that And it's the intro in the school Okay And that was the first game on the list Which was a great start Not robots but still Very sad very gay Mm-hmm

Correct That's what you get from that first hour Mm-hmm Really good I'm also like I'm also taking like incredibly quick breaks at the end of longer ones so that I can chop them up via the OPS record feature into possible future part ones. Okay. Yeah, that's the move. Yeah. If I'm like, if I'm like, yeah, you know what? Fuck it. Part one of thousand times just I'm just going to rename the fucking video. So exactly. Rename it. So men's got to say we got this. I got men doing the same system where sometimes you'll put one of four, but the thumbnail will allow for it to just be one. You know? We don't know what might continue.

I will say something about that game in particular, and something I'm realizing to about I guess myself is I don't always know when I'm jumping into a game, whether it's like primarily visual novel with a little bit of gameplay or 100% walking and talking, right? So I, you must have told me when we talked about it. I started it up and heard voice acting

and like my heart just relax. Oh, thank God. And I know you must have told me. But my assumption when I see like indie story heavy is like, oh, time to work out the throat muscles. Yep, yep, yep. And thankfully, yes, they have it covered here. In a really charming, quirky indie kind of way. The voice acting quality is very like amateur but good, you know.

It's good. It sounds like it sounds like everyone is getting their start. Right. I know what you mean. Yep. Like this is going to go on a demo reel. Now, what I was going to say, though, is that like when playing a game like that where I'm like, again, I know there's no, there's nothing besides the narrative that we're doing, I kind of have a little bit of an, it's just a little thing inside me that's kind of like, okay, this narrative better fucking grip me really hard because I want gameplay most of the time. And when I'm not getting it, I'm kind of like, you better fucking blow that narrative out of the water, you know? Listen, if it's just steak with no potatoes, the steak better kick my ass. That's it. That's it.

Like, I will give a game where the story is nonsense, or even mid, but the gameplay is great, way more of a leeway, you know, start than one where I'm locked in for just narrative and I'm not feeling it immediately. Boy, am I harsher on that and more willing to quit. A thousand times just like completely hooked me immediately. and I did the school section and was like this shit is cooking there is a lot going on here I did like I you know

there's a moment where you run into that giant pigeon right and I'm standing there I'm like this is a digitally recreated memory of the platonic ideal of a different person's idea of a pigeon

that's ridiculous that is a ridiculous concept to put in your game. They're doing weird, high-level stuff. And then I got, like, kind of sad because I know there's people who are going to play this game and go, oh, big pigeon.

Like, no, man. There's something going on here. Yeah. No, and it does a really good job. Unfortunately, this is one of those games where it's worth it. And you're like, yeah, this is worth it going for the ride. But I'm like, I'm remembering that beginning section

and being like, I'm putting up a little, like, a wall of like, yo, you, there's no other gameplay here. So you better fucking. you better nail this and it didn't. It was good. So yeah, a thousand times resist is excellent from what I played of it. I will probably go back to it on camera. That's incredibly likely. The next one up is a game called Cape Hidious, which is an extraordinarily lavishly animated MS paint game about being a pirate in which literally all you can do is move left and right.

That's it. Okay. You can also climb ladders. What is it called? Cape Hidious. Okay. It is super ugly, super detailed. There's no dialogue of any kind.

What the fuck? Like, what? It's super weird. Okay, okay. So is it suddenly just the time of corky-ass-MS paint games coming back to life because like just today I saw a trailer for

what the fuck was it called Bad Bich Blasters Yeah and it's MSPaint Acid Trip, high-lix ass RPG nonsense Okay, but yeah What the fuck is this? It's super weird. You play as a pirate

on a pirate ship in a weird pirate universe and weird things happen and you move left and right and I beat it in 19 minutes. Wow. For realsies. Okay. Like properly beat it in 19 minutes.

Perfect for the show. Great. Good game. Thumbs up. Next up is the root trees are dead, which I hate. I hate it. Did you play Obriden?

I didn't. Okay. So the root trees are dead is about a rich family that died and you were trying to map out their entire family tree. and you get a fake 1998 internet connection. And so you're doing stuff like

Carl Routree, and then you find articles about Carl Routree, and then you're like, oh, he's a CEO. Okay, put in that he's a CEO. And then you're looking through old magazines to try, oh, here's a picture of him. And then you're trying to find out the article about his daughters,

and then, okay, which one is the married one? That means she's the oldest. And you're doing all this little detective work. Yep. Pepe Silvia Simulator. It's very, very, very much like an internet version of Obriddi. Okay.

And it is really good. And it is really well put together. And it's super slick. And it has a really excellent, like, private eye kind of, uh, digging through the past kind of, um, like insurance adjuster kind of like gameplay loop that works really well. And I hate it. And I hate it. And I hate it. I hate it.

Overwhelmingly positive. I just do a fucking geology fucking paperwork. Overwhelmingly positive. And I want to fucking look, I just want to look up in the fake internet. Who is the oldest root tree sister? But oh, there's too many results and it doesn't give me that and it doesn't have a real name because it's rose. But that's a fake. Oh, I hate it.

Is it? Good game. Is it basically logic puzzles that like are, but like it's doing like the Silent Hill puzzle style thing where sometimes you got to know stuff outside of Silent Hill? No. No. It's all there. Okay. But you have to make like some deductive reasoning.

And I'm like, I don't like it. I don't. It's, oh, it's just a big puzzle. Okay, okay. So a big puzzle game made me feel dumb. Every time I, oh, I don't know. Loreline, the laser eyes. Yeah.

Okay. A good game. I'd recommend it to people who like anything to do with puzzles. Hold up. What about, is Blueprints that? Blueprints is kind of that. But blueprints also has like a rogue thing and like an architecture thing. But then blueprints started to make me feel really.

stupid and frustrated and that means it's a bad game oh okay okay so when a puzzle game starts to make me feel really stupid and angry that means it's bad now okay okay okay true to me and then I'll go wow blueprints is an incredible game bad games make me feel stupid good games make me feel good I don't want to feel bad I want to feel smart this is correct objective I also I also played the trails in the sky first chapter remake which is a remake of the PSP game legendary of Heroes Trails in the Sky from Falcom, the one with the Redhead that looks like Aska in it with the stick. Okay.

This is a one, I would call this a one to one remake in the most exacting terms. Like same script, but voice acted. Same scenes, but 3D animated. Same gameplay system, but now with the tutorial. Okay. Right. Right. Like, and I played it and it is, it is a really, really.

solid visually gorgeous old style RPG that feels really great and I came away going man I wish Square had done this to FF7 like after after remake and rebirth I actually would prefer like you know what I wanted out of the FF7 remake I wanted like pre-rendered backgrounds with the same camera and new models on top of it and not touching a single other thing I literally just want is a fucking straight update. I think, so we had versions of this conversation for years over, ever, I mean, ever since the first talks of when are they going to remake seven. And I think it was like, that's what a lot of people want, but then there's also the idea

of like, a new audience is showing up for this and the idea of putting in all this effort, but then not actually doing a new thing with it would be too much of a waste and Square would never approve that, yada, yada, yada. And I think it was kind of like, okay, so we got to do the, the rebirth thing. We got it. No, not Rebirth. We got to do the rebuild solution. Here's a really good example of what I'm talking about. We got a gentleman in chat who says FU Pat, you were sucking remake off all over, which is true. Based on the promise that remake makes it the end of remake where things are going to be really different.

And then Rebirth came out in which nothing was different at all. And then the problem was, so if it was actually nothing was going to be different, you might as well just have remade the thing the way like everybody wanted, which was just a one-to-one PS1 game upscale. Yeah, so like the Ava bit is you start faithful and then shit diverges and goes nuts. And now we're two games out of three in.

And it's like, oh, we're still like 99% faithful. Because you have to still find a way to expensively give the remake that people want to feel in the middle of a not-release. Yeah, but you can't get a new audience when the fucking remake is like assuming you played the game back in 97. Like it doesn't, it's not even trading on the idea that you're, you replayed it like relatively

recently. It kind of feels like, yeah, you did it 20 years ago. Remember that? Like, no. But anyway, Trails and Sky, um, FC remake, super solid. Okay. I really liked it. Might play it again on the channel.

I'm not sure. It's also the start of the Trails series, which has 30. 500 games in it. Wow. Okay. So, hmm. Yeah. Okay. Okay. This is, I'm like, I feel like I'm like, what, why does this ring a bell?

Is this the one or is, I'm looking, it's like, oh, was there like people were mad about translations or something, but. Yes, they always are. Yeah. Okay. They always are. Right, right, right. Okay.

So there's trails, trails in the sky, trails in the sky, two, trails in the sky, three, trails from Azores from zero. Trails of Cold Steel 1, 2, 3, 4. Trails of Daybreak, Trails of Horizon. And most of those are Trilogies. There's Trails games. Kep.

And of course, they're all connected. They're all connected. And this is the first one, which is the Yakuza 1 of the series getting reweighed. This is essentially Trails in the Sky First Chapter Extreme, Kawami.

I got a trail for you. Yeah? from my belly button Oh no thanks bro To my dick Really? You didn't have to Anyway

Also played age of decadence It's an old-timey RPG That looks like it looks like a Like an isometric balder skate in like Rome I hate it Oh I don't like it Okay

Don't like anything about it That's my review I also played haste Have you played haste Hey, um, I, I, I, no, but I wrote it down because somebody came into my chat and said, you got to play haste. So I bet you was the same person. I bet you was the same person. Yeah. Uh, haste kicks ass. Um, haste is, is, it's like a rogue like runner. It feels like what I would like many Sonic games to feel like. Mm-hmm. It controls really well. It's super colorful.

The character designs are super, super great. Very pretty. The music's pumping. It's awesome. It's fucking great. Anybody who likes fast games and running should check out haste. Looking at, yeah, so I think I added this to my card. I don't think I bought it just yet, but looking at the trailer, does it run in this kind of frame rate? It looks kind of choppy, but like I feel like a game like this needs to... I ran it at 120. Okay, yeah, this is super rock solid.

You want it smooth as hell. Okay, cool. Yeah, nice. Played Mech Warrior 5. Oh, shit. Okay. It's like the first time I've played a Mech Warrior game in like decades, I think. I think we might have looked at one briefly for like Mecca Week, but I think you were playing that.

Yeah, Mecca Week did, we did take a look. Um, fuck, man, I'm so glad that Mech Warrior games all the way out here in Lord Zone 2025 are still like the clunkiest fucking weirdo games for freaks. Like, why would, why would aiming with your fucking gun turn your robot? stupid. The torso's not connected, you idiot. Why would you move forward by pressing forward? No, you're gassing up the acceleration. You're just going to leave that shit on. It's the most PC gaming ass fucking shit. You're walking in a gun on legs, man. It's falling apart. It's super cool. I will say two missions.

Man, it's so clunky. It's awesome. Okay, so what I remember, because I remember checking out, yeah, a little bit of this back in the day when we did the Mecha Week. And I remember also kind of feeling, though, like the memories of this clunky old mecha shit, Hawken got a better, captured my, what my... Well, Hawken is like a first person shooter with mecca trappings, right? Yeah, yeah, but I just, in terms of vibes of the robot, I remember Hawkin was like, oh, this is what my childhood imagination of Mech Warrior was closer to than what we got from the game, from...

Yeah, no, Mac Warriors actually like, all right, I've set my course. I'm going to, ain't, I'm going to move into. this straight line. Now I'm going to aim at the tangent as I want on the face. Target is beyond inspection radius. Oh, that's a good game. Super crazy for freaks. Like, do you want to take insurance out

on your Mac before you go out there for damage? Cowardous will not be tolerated. Mission failed. Are the Jade Falcon still a thing? I don't know. Ghost Bears' legacy? I don't know. I liked it, though. It was cool.

I played a game that was on almost every Japanese developer's 2025 game of the year list. It's called Urban Myth Dissolution Center. Wow, that's a mouthful. It is. It is a Game Boy Advance style mystery game in which you are a young woman with clairvoyance who is roaming around Japan trying to dispel or solve urban myths that may or may not be real. It's Ace Attorney, but with ghosts. You are basically

playing as Fox Mulder and Dana Scully in one character looking to see if the Jersey Devil is real, or if the Knife Alien was here. Charming arts. Super charming, cool visuals,

crazy good soundtrack, really, really interesting gameplay, which includes like scrolling through social media to find keywords to see if like, you'll see, oh, there was a scary ghost. Oh, like, let's search for ghost reports and see who's got the most likes. And then, like, you end up finding, like, the very first person to go investigate because you have to search whether or not they were doxed, because the photo of the ghost has a notable billboard beside their house. Oh. I'm looking at this.

It's super cool. It's super stylish. Yeah. I'm looking at the cutscenes here. And I'm just remember. remembering that Game Boy Color Resident Evil port never quite came out, did it? It did. It literally came out in the last week. Wait, what? A 97% complete version of that Game Boy Color, that Game Boy version of Resident Evil came out. Now? Yeah. What the fuck?

What are the odds? Holy shit. It's actually completable. That's crazy. I remember seeing screenshots of that and like as a promise of what was coming. And I was like, oh my God, Nintendo's the best you fucking rule. I can't believe they're. doing it. Also,

remaking this entire thing with pixels. It looked so stylistically cool and like different. I was like, what the fuck? That's impressive as hell. That's crazy. Good job manifesting it, but. Wow. So urban myth is cool. I played Wall World.

Wall World's a mining game where you have a robot spider on the side of a wall and then you dismount from the wall and then go inside and do mining stuff and get little upgrades and then go back to the Spider robot and then upgrade the turret so you can fight waves and enemies. It's almost exactly the same as a game called Domekeeper, just rotated 90 degrees and worse.

Okay. Which it like, it really is like astonishingly similar to a different game with the same concept, but significantly worse. Interesting. Which is like a death sentence for me. Is Spelunking into the walls and Mr. Diggering? into the walls more of the game or is it shooting out at the stuff coming at on the it's like to the robot 6040 digging versus shooting okay uh i played hellish quart yes a game that you would be familiar with of course of course you would be i was there uh it has

a story mode now where you ride a horse around and there's like cut scenes that's ridiculous that game does not deserve that it controls like shit and looks like crap hell yeah Hell yeah. Clearly a lot of love goes into the old-timey Hema-inspired sword-fighting history game, Hellish Court. So it controls really bad. So it feels really bad. There's a key piece of the puzzle that you need to understand Hellish Court. What's that?

That is the old 360 deadliest warrior fighting game. I do know that. Yes, I am aware of that. We played a bunch of those, if I'm not mistaken. This is taking that spiritual energy and successing with it. It is a fighting game. It's a sword fighting game based off of historical sword fighting. This is carrying the energy of Deadliest Warrior, which was funter than it deserved to be.

It just feels like complete shit. If this was like a Friday night Fistakuffs, I would have been like, yo, this game is trash. and I would have just repeated that every like 15 minutes and otherwise just play my matches. I got into it. That doesn't mean anything. Wully, you get into any fighting game. Yeah, it wasn't Bishito Blading it,

but there's some stuff going on. There's stuff going on. All right? Like, maybe this is like an unfair comparison. Like, I don't know. Like, I don't know genuinely. I genuinely don't know if this is like reasonable. But like, this is obviously inspired about like Bushita played, right?

Yeah, that's part of it. That's part of it. And like I'm messing around with. it and I'm like, why does this game from 2025 control worse than a game that I played fucking 30 years ago? Yeah. Come on. And also, a lot of

it's, if I remember correctly too, like a lot of those ideals are more cleanly realized in For Honor, but the camera's in a different place and also fucking deadliest warrior though. I like Forer Honor. Sun Tzu. Before For Honor became For Honor.

It's still going. For Honor is like probably the game that I liked the most before anyone, including me, got good at it. Because that system just completely falls apart once anyone knows what they're doing. They've, like the mid-level for Honor gameplay is really good. The high level is bad. It's become a completely different beast at this point. And I'm planning to, I'm working on something to see if I can take a look.

As soon as I saw like a video of like, unlock your camera to spin to, oh, fuck this. Fuck this shit. Yeah. No, there's there's very few instances where a like third person fighting thing where I'd feel like I prefer that to having both of us on camera at the same time. Yeah. Played Tower of Guns. It is a very mediocre rogue like that kind of does like borderland style weapon upgrades. That's it.

Okay. That's it. I played a game called Unbeatable. Oh. I'm sure you have seen. Uh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So that. Unbeatable is fucking weird.

It is a weird game. So it is a rhythm. So, okay, bluntly, it is a rhythm game. You're hitting L1 and R1 to do rhythm game stuff on a notepad, kind of like the Konami rhythm game. It has a really good soundtrack. It is also flagrantly obsessed with Studio Trigger. Yeah.

Oh, yeah. Blatent. It is. Blatant. It might be the most blatant I have ever seen of like love letter to a very specific animation studio. Because everybody looks like a Studio Trigger character, specifically like a premier character.

or panning and stocking. What's that? There's penny and stocking stuff going on. Yeah. The, or like, you know, like the shading is studio trigger, the look.

The general concept is very fully, coolly. But the one that really zoned in on me, I'm like, wow, these people are like obsessive freaks is that the band you play as

in the game's intro is called One More Final, which is the name of the last scene in Evangelion, which is one more final. Oh, Oh, right, at the one who pops up on the eye catch. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, and I'm like, there's no, like, that is the only time I have ever seen the phrase one more final ever in my entire fucking life. So it's clearly based off of that. There's, there's vibes of, so there's a lot of, uh, uh, there's some Scott pilgriming stuff happening to. Yeah, a little bit. Mm-hmm. Um, um, it starts off really bad. Really, really, really, really fucking bad. it takes about 45 minutes to start playing the game.

And in between that, it is a musicless visual novel. Okay, so you got how far? I got 45 minutes in and then did one game play. And then I'm like, we need to move on. And then I went to the game's arcade mode, which turns it into a Konami rhythm game that really looks like DDR. are. So where? And they just unlock a shit million songs for you to play. A million percent. So

a million percent. So where did you stop exactly? Uh, what location? I stopped after the chase scene, uh, with cops. Okay. So yes, what you're describing is the problem. It's stylish as fuck. It's gorgeous. It sounds great. It has an attitude about it with the whole tutorial and the starting the game out. Like you're, it's coming from somebody that's like, I'm going to be breaking the fourth wall constantly. Um, and you're running around the wall. Um, and you're running around the world and like the aesthetic it's paying service to is being delivered like phenomenally but there's bugs and shit that are like you can run off camera and fucking get stuck into some horrible horrible bugs so yep i ran into a really bad bug which was i'm pretty good at rhythm games

yep and uh the uh in the very first tutorial i was doing the rhythm stuff no problem like l1 for the bottom r one for the top and then i got to the thing that says mash, right? Like the mash prompt. But I hit it on normal timing so the mash prompt never showed up. So I hit it once and then it just passed through and failed

and let me keep doing the song. And then the subsequent police chase thing, I would get hooked by the van. And I would hit the button on the timing and not mash. Nope. Because I'm like, what is happening?

Yeah. And I had to ask chat what is happening. And the answer is if you hit any button during any tutorial and do it correctly, even if you're just playing along, it goes, oh, you know what you're doing and skips that tutorial forever. And so like, there's like significant parts of the gameplay that I'm like, I don't know what the fuck it wants for me right now. That bridge cut scene felt like stuff got desynced. It was late on the timing of it for sure. There's parts where you're running around in the environment. So there's a you basically, there's a jail that you enter right after that. You can, if you, if you, like, walk off the static camera from the wrong angle, it doesn't switch camera angles and you can get stuck outside of the camera. And that can happen and you can save progress and absolutely permanently fuck up your save by wandering the wrong way. And has tons of love put into it. And its core gameplay is super solid.

The tutorials are really bad. It is pretty buggy. characters overlapping their dialogue prompts and then you'd hit X and you'd skip a bunch of dialogue. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And like the dialogue prompts, I thought that was intentional. I thought it was like, I noticed that I thought I thought that characters were trying to cut each other off and it wasn't. You know, you're literally missing stuff. And then yes, on top of all of that, unfortunately, huge problem here is the pacing. Because I went past that chase. I went further in. I kept going. It doesn't change. It stays like that kind of visual novel thing with one

segment of gameplay per chapter for the next three hours or so. That's terrible! It super bugged me because I'm like I'm waiting for the game to become this like, yo let's fucking hit the tracks, let's do the music, it's coming at you,

and then you get to the next section and go, go, go, go, and it never does that. I was expecting elite beat agents with a story. So now we get to this thing where almost like I was just describing with a thousand times resist, you're like, okay, this is 95, percent visual novel, five percent gameplay. Yeah, but I'm here for the gameplay.

I'm here for. And why does the visual novel part have no music? And so it's none of it's happening. And then I end up being, I went, so I went a good three hours in or so, and it doesn't change. I, I, it is like the most excited I've been to boot up something and like the most disappointed I've been turning it off for a long time. It has such cool aesthetic things going on and the promises there, the potential, but it just, the pacing fucks that up and then the bugs fuck that up. Yep. And I remember, so I played it at the dev booth at packs or Magfest or somewhere. And I played just the round of like the rhythm game.

And I was like, okay, this is cool. Yeah, the rhythm game is super solid. And then the demo came out and had no story mode in it. It was just the rhythm. And you picked one of like five or six songs or so. And I was like, okay, this is the promises here, but I kind of need to see a bit more. And then unfortunately, like, that's as far as it went, you know? Because even when you do get to the rhythm story sections, like the, the one or two that you do are super basic and, like, they're not like the best segments, you know, to get that gameplay going. So, yeah, there's other ways to do this.

And even in games that I had bigger problems with, like Everhood, for example, you know, for all the issues I had with that, that was a way better flawless, a way better integration of rhythm and plot together. and then keeping the pacing of like playing the musical side and then going into the story and back and forth, back and forth, go, go, go, you know, it's such dropped promise. Yeah, no, unbeatable, super weird. Like, massive flaws. Like, huge flaws. Fixable, but it needs more time.

Maybe I'll come back to it in like a year after like five patches or something like that. Speaking of, I actually played another, immediately after it, I played a rhythm game called Away from Home, which is like, like an earthbound style RPG in which you were doing like fairly complex, um, like timing, uh, like, not DDR, but more like amplitude like puzzles during every fight. Like you're just, you're tapping the shit out of it. Um, God damn it. Charming art style. What's that? Away from home is first and foremost a Drake song. Second, a game on Steam. That, that's, uh, that's unfortunate. You should look that up before you name your game. Um,

Regardless, cool art style, very charming writing. Like really, really interesting gameplay. Whoa. And I discovered two massive problems. Okay. Like cataclysmic issues. One is the tutorial music is not synced up to the beat they want you to hit during the tutorial. Oh, no.

Was there really options like lag? The issue is not lag. The tutorial music is just literally not synced up. Brutal. To the beat they want you to hit. Brutal. And it's really, really, really slow beats because they're tutorializing you. And so I failed the tutorial for like 10 minutes.

Oh, man. On like the baby as shit. And I'm like, oh, I feel stupid. And like, it's two notes going towards the center. and I thought you had to hit the notes on the outs, like to overlap a line they would go over? No. And then I thought I had to hit them when the notes touched. No. You have to hit both notes when they're next to each other in the box,

which is super, super unintuitive. Gorgeous sprites. And then the very first fight has way, way, way faster beat and way, way, way, way more notes, at which point, okay, I know how to play amplitude, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, but no problem. And then I discovered a few minutes later that there is, is no penalty for missing notes. So when there is just a hundred defend notes,

just mash the X button through it. Oh. And just head every note. There's absolutely no problem just mashing through it. There's no, you don't lose your counter. You don't lose your energy. You don't, you don't lose nothing. You just mash it out.

And as long as there's no fail state for the note, as long as you hit it when it's there. There's no fail state for the note other than not hitting it. Okay. Okay. Oh, man. This is a stylish, nice sprite, fucking based game, too. So, um, Shonen Hero, the guy who, uh, recommended it says there used to be a penalty,

but they took it out, which is weird. Um, don't know what's up with that. But yeah, uh, they could clean that up and it would be really, really interesting. The trailer has a couple of shots that are, that look like mode 70, like 3D-ish gameplay? Is that a part of the gameplay too? Or is it all just, um, earthbound? I don't know. I didn't see it. Okay. Only played about 45 minutes. Okay. Uh, a game I did, I played for considerably longer than 45 minutes. I played a game about digging a hole. The game's title is, quote, a game about digging a hole, end quote.

I beat this game on stream. Did you ever play ridiculous fishing? Yeah. It's that, but digging a hole in your backyard. Sweet. It's literally that. It is the exact same it is the exact same like loop of

have a tiny little shovel, dig a little bit, get some money, go upgrade, get a bigger shovel, dig a little bit, get more money. Get a bigger shovel. Get a bigger inventory. Get a jetpack. Get a drive, dig a whole 80 meters deep so you have to jetpack all the way out. Oh no. It's dark. Got to buy lamps. Put the lamps so that you can see. Okay. Super good. Very satisfying. Beat it in an hour 15. Cool. Um, note to everybody that do not try to do this in real life. Uh, there was a lady who decided to dig a big hole in her backyard.

I don't know if you remember that story. I do remember her, yes. And she just kept going and kept going and got to a point where the structural integrity of her house and her neighbor's houses was being damaged by the depth of her hole. And, uh, it became a huge problem. Yeah. Don't just dig a big long hole for no reason. Also, you don't know where pipes and rainbow wires are.

And you don't want to cut those. Don't want to cut it. Oh. If you cut a pipe digging in your backyard, you're going to have a hard, hard day. You have a bad day. If my fucking house falls into a sinkhole because you just dug too deep and loosened the wrong rock, there better be gold down there. Gonna be very mad.

There better be gold down. down there. Yeah. Let's see. Moving on. I played a demo called Texanoplasm. I'm going to copy the title for you

because it's quite... I'm going to give that a shot. T-E-X. No. No. It's not like text-no-lize. The anime. It's tough. There's a Z instead of an S as plasm. Okay. Sure.

Okay. Yeah, did you get it? I'll just type it for you. uh texanoplasm has a demo out i played the demo this is a first person beat him up that is it's it's it's it's maylay ultra kill hello uh it has like the grimyest cheapest main menu and terrible voiceover and then you get in there and it's like here's your punch combos here's your parry here's your shift to dash around enemies uh pick up melee weapons and throw them at people let's go it's super super fucking cool Yeah, okay. It's super fucking solid. This, the, yeah, because there was, this is, this is, this is, I like this. I like this. I like the vibes. It's awesome. Like fight night stuff.

Yeah, it's just, it's super cool. Okay. That's it. I played bat to the heavens, which is, um, anime Bennett Fotties getting over it. Sure. It's a character who can't jump. and so you have to build up a bat to hit the ground to launch yourself skyward and then you have to swing sideways to edge yourself a little bit over

and bounce yourself off a wall so you can get momentum. Oh my God, I hate it. Oh, I hate it. I hate it so much. Hate it. Did you play Jump King? I did not. Okay.

Because I was playing. some jump king and uh oh well no no this is not quite jump king because you're actually like going sideways and stuff okay I don't play jump king it's a jump king is just going straight up and like you cannot correct in midair your jump trajectory that's crazy and you just you got to you got to hold the right amount of jump and you got to hold the right amount of left and right and hope for the best that's not but it's it's absolute streamer bait yeah don't don't like it. Don't like it even a little. I also threw in the

Castlevania Advance Collection. Sure. Which very good ports of Circle of the Moon, Area of Sorrow, and the other one. God awful port of Rondo of Blood.

Oh. For some reason, it is the Super Nintendo version of Rondo of Blood. And not the Saturn? No. And it is a bad. port of that too.

But it got the Game Boy Color games fine. The Game Boy games are rock solid. But God damn it, I don't know why the fuck. They chose Dracula X instead of fucking wrong. It was baffling. Baffling.

And last but not least, for now, I threw in Grand Blue Fantasy Relink. Oh, yeah. Okay. Did you ever touch that? I played, uh, I did a quick look of that. That game is weird. It is very strange.

They are throwing your ass into the deep end of multiple years of of a fucking Gatcha game storyline. And fuck it, we're on a different island. So ignore all that shit. Yeah, Grand Blue is a really, it's an interesting IP because it's one where I am not interested in interfacing with this franchise

unless the gameplay is a genre I love. and in this case the fighting game and this character action style thing are genres I love so I'm down to to play with it in that way but it's a weird mashup that's it like of like dragons dogma and monster hunter and like a character action game all the characters feel very different the game looks gorgeous it's got good juice moving around but I kind of got sold on it fairly strongly during the tutorial when you're fighting Pahomit and they're doing like FF14 style like damage indicators on the ground. And then you fight what is literally Tegrex, the Monster hunter monster in one of the earlier things. And he has Tegrax's moves. I'm like, oh, this is going to become a very different game by the end of it.

But you're doing it solo. This is going to turn into Monster Hunter. But on top of that, the first upgrade I got was launch. like it starts off as a very basic Dynasty Warriors style game and then like literally the first upgrade for every character is jump and hit X to launch characters for air commas. Get your high time. Okay.

That's what made me, that's what made me curious to take a look. Exactly. You got high time going, right? And what I will say is there's a lot of different characters. They're initially you're like, oh, look at all the variety of them, but they do have a bit of that like. Yeah, there's overlap.

There's a lot of overlap on that. There are more, yeah, there's not as much. much to them as you would initially think. You know, which, like, for example, like, Zenliss has a lot of characters, too, or like punishing Grey Raven. But, you know, they're, they're, they're not, like, fucking oceans of depth to dive into. They're, they're just basic, similar, simple characters with, like, move lists that are, you're building a whole team.

Exactly. That's my point is they're all a little, not shallow, but they're not super deep as individuals. But then you have them together and the synergy stuff builds up. And then, yes, you have the whole team. Yeah, it's. really cool. Right. I really like it. I might go back to it either myself or on camera, but I liked it. And that's what I got for the first fucking three streams of Beat the Backlog. I have another Beat the Backlog tomorrow, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, and Monday, because that's when the steam sale will end, which we all know this is what this fucking segment is for is so that I can show you weird shit for the Steen. Steam sale. The backlog will probably come back.

I might just keep it going. Fuck it. There's nothing coming out. Now, once you clear each of these games, are you then going over to your backloggery website and updating your... No. No. What I'm doing, Willie, is... So I don't know if you've ever spent any time organizing your Steam profile.

I did a little bit a while ago, because I put things into potential LPs, you know, fighting games and, like, quick looks, et cetera. So I have the following lists. Favorites play unplayed. Shit I've never booted. Dropped it, but could play later. Done with, which is 981 games in it. And then I have beat the backlog unplayed and beated the backlog. Okay.

And then I have stream code provided, not code provided. Okay. So if the game gets a recommend or a must buy, I put it into. to beat the backlog. And if the game is like, fuck this shit, I put it into Dunwith, along with like, you know, let me just grab a random game that's in the fucking Dunwith folder.

What the fuck's in here? Uh, fucking the Bard's Tale or, uh, call a Cthulhu dark corners of the earth. Man. Did you ever go back to your list of humble bundle purchases and actually sort them out? Nope.

Nope. This earth will crumble away and the sun, the heat death of the universe will occur. Organizing them is such a mess. First. Holy shit. I bought so many humble bundles and I never used one. It was just like, oh, look at this deal. Grab it.

And I have weeks and weeks of fucking codes just sitting there. I don't even know if they're still around. I'm not going to touch it. It's too late now. But that's what's going on with me. You can check out more of that crap over at Twitch. TV slash Pat Stairs at and YouTube.com slash Pat Stairs at. Also, tonight

at 11 p.m. Page and I are going to be watching the fallout season to episode three with y'all live. It's just going to be our heads watching along. In addition, tomorrow evening, it'll be a beat the backlog, but when the baby goes down to sleep, Paige is going to head

over around 11 p.m. and we're going to do new year's stuff. Nope. And that's it. Hey, I got to take a quick break because this dog needs to eat. He was burping on. me, which means he's hungry. Bear me. Quick word from our sponsors.

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A couple things going on this week. You know, mainly big on what we did with our week. less so on the news, but one wild one is, have you seen what's going on with the Rainbow Six Siege? Yes, I have. It's good stuff over there. Crazy. It's good stuff over there.

So Siege got hacked, but they get, like, Ubisoft gets hacked all the time. Yeah. But this one is like a wild play, because it's not just that the game got hacked. It's that the people who hacked Then gave all players Two billion credits Banned Unband

Everybody who worked at Ubisoft Banned everyone who worked there Banned all the devs Unband all the banned people And gave everyone All rare skins Including dev skins And gave everyone all the renown

Renown And it's a ridiculous like not just hack but destruction of the economy of the game. So I'm pretty sure I can I can like ballpark the gut feeling on this. So they can just roll all that back. They can literally just, you know, beep boop and just roll everything back. But what's interesting is that before they rolled it back in the Rainbow Six Seed Discord, there was some talk from a couple of the devs that they were going to,

ban people who used that currency. Yep. Yep. And people started to go nuts before that even got set in stone. And then official Rainbow Six Siege said, no, we're just going to roll it all back. We're just going to roll it all back like nothing happened and anything's going to go back to the way it was. I genuinely think the plan was to get, give people the currency so that tons of people bought shit with that currency and then Rainbow Six Siege killed its own game

with the bandwave of people who were just going oh cool free money and then bought things. Possibly because yeah I saw that the second part of this was that a lot of people were saying don't even log into the game right now because apparently

there have been instances in the past where people have gotten banned for stuff that's Ubi's fault. The game When the game fucks up, people have gotten banned for the game fucking up. So the idea that in this case, they're going to discriminate or that they wouldn't have a stupid solution like that is real. I played siege for a very short period of time. And I remember seeing people talking about the time that I played it, that they would load into a match and the game would crash.

And they'd load into a second match and the game would crash. and they would go to matchmake and it would be like you keep rage quitting you're in jail for a day and they were like what the fuck oh my god

so I'm remembering a story that we covered some years ago maybe but there was a gadget game that accidentally gave people too many like free coins I want to say it's fake grand order and I think the solution

was they put everyone's account into debt. So whenever they bought. So like you still got to keep it, but you had negative like money and or the daily rewards would be taken away until the debt was repaid or something to that effect, right? Um, if this is, I don't think that's correct to do.

Like if your, if your system doesn't allow for a full server reset or roll back to the state before things went wrong. um yeah the i mean i'm in well i was going to say that like if you you can't do that with someone's credit card if they're fucking on a premium currency that's attached to things right so yeah i i i imagine if they have the ability to like just fully go like no none of that happened we're going back to the way it was right before that's fine then no no harm no foul i guess but like yeah putting people into a into a potential debt the answer that that that that game came up with was

ridiculous at the time. I don't know what the state of Siege is. I don't know what the, like... I have never heard one good thing about Siege ever. I heard people were having fun playing it, that it was a popular thing, and it was a... Have not heard that. Okay. I think, I'm thinking back to, I think, when it was first, like, coming out and blowing up,

And it was like, oh shit, this new Rainbow Six game is crazy. So I played it for a little bit. I played it for about a month. And my takeaway was that it was League of Legends for Modern Military Ners. With everything that comes along with that. All the weight of calling something the League of Legends of something. Sure. Sure. I mean, it's also like, yeah.

Well, it's, and there's always room for the, the, um, the, the, the, the clancy, you know, hyper-realistic bits. But also, this has, it has like the characters and stuff too, right? Like as, yeah, yeah. Um, anyway, so that's a wild hack. You do not see hacks like this often where they're like, we're not just going to take over the servers and clown, but we're going to- get free money. We're going to fuck over the actual economy of the game. So, um, that was a thing.

What else happened? So, yeah, unclear what the reasoning is just yet, but one of the co-founders of CD Project is acquiring GOG ownership from CD Project. CD Project, I don't know, whatever. And I guess they're just kind of like separating the GOG. They've been pretty far apart for a long time. That's not all that shocking. Yeah. people are speculating maybe it's because it doesn't tie it to their stocks anymore or if they ever get bought out or if anything ever happens it doesn't have to affect GOG.

Oh, it's going private. Oh, okay. That makes sense. People in chat are saying it's going private as a result of this. Okay. So, okay, yeah, they're completely separate from each other. The shareholders are going to be like, can you guys put DRM on there? And they like, they would all rather burn the company down than do that. Right. Whereas CD Project needs to have its, it has its stocks open. So yeah. Okay. Um, you know, not much to that. That's good then. That's good for everybody. If people can't get their hands on it, yeah, sure, sure. Steam is number one with with GOG being like an incredibly clear number two. Speaking of things on Steam, by the way, PSA for everybody, but River City Ransom Underground is getting delisted. We don't know when.

Cool. So. Could be delisted by the- the time you hear this. That this is, they, they put out an announcement saying, uh, it's happening. So yeah, go get it. Absolutely no information as to why. Uh, there was, they, it was a licensing thing.

And I mean, it always is, but then they weren't more specific. Because the River City and Double Dragon licenses are fast and loose. They're always fast and loose. Everyone gets one and gets one for a minute. And then maybe it comes, maybe it stays, maybe it goes. There's been so many different River shitty and double dragon games. More like River shitty, am I right? Thank you. So they're not telling you when.

But if you already own it, obviously, you're not going to lose it. But it's just, yep, you're not going to be able to get that game soon. And that one had some cool shit in it. That one had some good mechanics. I think it had the sick break dancer in it. Anyway, there was that. There is an unofficial helltaker fighting game that we're seeing a bit more of. I want to say the first footage of this showed up sometime last year or so.

Hell versus by Kyohei is the name of it. And we saw like one or two characters doing some like training mode stuff. And it seems like it's coming along. go check it out. There's an itch.io page and pretty dope sprites given the game. Like for a game that honestly

just had like visual novel art as like doing most of the heavy lifting and then these little tiny little pixel thing for the actual gameplay. I'm surprised there hasn't been like more of this world because it was such a big hit for such like limited assets for these characters that are great designs.

So this is a good genre for it. Again, I take her, that's that thing where the guy was like, I'm going to make my goddamn Cosma Curr U game with the devil girls in the suits. That's it. And no one can stop me. That's it. Is that it? Yep.

Yeah. Just devil harum. But it's like, again, it's one of those things where, like, for all these fan art and, like, fandom it spawned. The source material is so simple and like short, you know. Good for them. Yeah. So there should be more of it. Anyway, this is

again, this is unofficial, but check it out. Hell versus. I'm going to give that a shot when I get a chance. I mentioned it earlier, but bad bitch blasters is an MSPaint trippy ass RPG

thing that came out not too long ago. And if I'm looking at this as a, like, Hylix, like... Wow, this is like unwatchable. Yeah, it's like a Newgrounds animation. A hylix-ass nightmare of MSPaint, acid trip RPG mechanics going on.

But I am... No layers are correct. Oh, man. This is like on purpose. I am intrigued. I am intrigued by the visuals of bad bitch blasters. Check that out. What else is happening? Okay, the power of one guy on IMDB. Oh, man, he's going nuts.

What is this dude's problem? Willie, what's happening? Okay, so Proz-D first was like, yo, some fucking asshats deleting my credits on IMDB, and a bunch of other voice actors are like, yeah, I don't know what the fuck is going on. And upon, you know, further inspection, it turns out that like one dude who then jumped on and started replying to these threads by voice actors going, I don't know what's happening, but all my IMDB credits are getting deleted from all my work.

He then, this one guy basically came out and said, yes, I am doing this. and the reason is because these people are incorrectly being listed under cast when they should be listed under voice actor dubbing. And that's a category that has been introduced to IMDB a couple months ago. And so he's basically going and saying, I don't want to see, I don't want it. Where's the exact wording of it? He's like, I don't want to see dub actors being listed as main cast when they should be listed as dub actors. or whatever and then going in and because anyone can edit IMDB he's constantly deleting it and whenever people are a reinserting or re-adding or whatever he's one guy deleting all of these

things for every actor for every show that he cares about and it appears nothing can be done to stop him because IMDB has a anyone edits it and they get approved pretty easily system wild shit and for a number of the voice actors they're basically he's saying these should be

re-added under the correct label but he's not doing that he's just deleting the entries so it's not the thing of I'm going to move it over to where I think the correct place should be that's your job no my job is to remove the mistake

and that's all that's all the person's doing so for the reasoning they claim they're not actually doing that they're just going back and continuously erasing it and it seems like nothing can be done system-wide to stop this you might think well can't everyone just once a day re-add their own credits won't this guy get tired no if you like the energy it shows to start this campaign to begin with then to come out and go nah i'm standing on this and i'm doing it for everything that i care about and fighting against everyone aggressively you will never win you will never stop i have

A surplus of time and an obsession with something that doesn't matter. He has found his calling in life. This is what it is. He will literally die on this hill. Like, there's no stopping it unless you fucking IP ban maybe. But even then, I feel like... IP bands aren't what they used to be. Yeah, I feel like a trip over to the next public Wi-Fi is going to just...

Back when we used to have static IP, man, that was all right. But nowadays, hmm. Mm-hmm. No, the entire... We need a new more mentally ill guy. The entire voice acting industry versus one dude, one guy being the most one guy that has ever one guide.

If you want to see the type of personality that does this, you can go over to Justin Wang's YouTube and look up the Silent Hill 4 circumcision theory episode in which you would be astonished at how much effort some guy can go to to vandalize a wiki because no you don't understand I mean look man

I've read some welcome to the NHK you know there is a there is a very specific level of unemployment that we're describing here there is a level of neat that you get you hit where it's like I'm just my life's calling

is to like to make sure not just to delete these things but to make sure that anyone and re-adding them to the things I've previously deleted gets redeleted every single day. So there's like obviously going to be an aspect of like older person now going, what are you doing, typing this from your mom's basement, kind of like dismissal.

But like the phrase, don't you have anything better to do, is always applicable to people who are wasting their time with dumb bullshit. And if you're, 20 or older, you definitely have run into somebody who is just absolutely wasted a significant portion of their life with some absolutely meaningless antagonistic bullshit that doesn't mean shit to anyone. Oh yeah. No. Look, whatever the fuck is going on, it's very clear that like, whatever life had in store for this person is they're not enjoying it and

they have dedicated their ground to this cause and dug their heels in. At least I can do this. Because this is the only thing left. It's quite clear that this is all that's going on. And, you know, they need help that I don't know what they're going to get, but fuck.

Maybe the rants releases on Steam will distract them. I, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just kind of like, it's a, amazing that IMDB doesn't have a fallback here to just be like, oh yeah, we have vandals all the time. Fuck that. So that's one of those things that like every time something like this happens

and you just go like, isn't there anything in, no, there's nothing. Why did you build it like this? Because we're stupid. Next question. I mean, even Wikipedia has a fucking, oh, this is being, this is a current event and too many people are harassing it. So lock the edit, et cetera, et cetera, you know. Anyway, wild shit going on over there. Also, like, it's weird because, like, I have, like, IMDB pops up weirdly sometimes with, like, incorrect credits for things all the time. And, you know, it's kind of, like, surprising, I guess, to see that it's like, oh, shit, I guess it really is important. for a lot of people's credits, you know?

Who would go on the internet and lie? Who could do such a thing? I don't think anyone working in video games was expecting it, but one of the most important sites is Moby Games, because Moby Games puts all the credits of everyone who's ever worked on any video game together and links them. So anyone in the industry, all QA testers, everybody has a Moby Games page, And it's like out of nowhere, this is an important place for your resume.

You know? Anyway, do not underestimate one fucking guy. I will. I will. Okay. Well, all right. Another thing. Hey, it's not much, but it's the Steam page is up for Gang of Dragon.

Yeah. Would you believe that this action, adventure, takes place in Kabuki Cho Oh yeah dude the the fucking The arch was in the goddamn trailer Well I talked about the steam page to you like two weeks ago Okay

Well fuck then yeah they put some more screenshots out and I took a look at them and it's the same goddamn street They're not even remotely pretending They're not there's like zero And we knew but also Fuck you. Too bad. We're doing it. Come get... Like, the fucking street he's on in the first screenshot. Like Bob Umu Soyeh, whatever, the clown is like three feet to his right off.

Bob Utsnomia. Yeah. Yeah. Send your legal team after me, says Negoshi. I'm hiding... I'm hiding... I'm hiding behind a hundred yakasa. You don't own the concept of a criminal. And I'm friends with the actual criminals now. I'm friends with them. They're my friends.

I'm wearing leopard print and a spray tan. You can't do anything to me. Just show him a picture of him back in the monkey ball days and watch him melt. He looked really happy back. He did. He did. I don't, when you see him with the girls on the throne with the fucking spray tan, I don't know that he's.

happier. It's true. God damn it. Pre-crisis negotii. Yeah. All right. Not much else, really. I saw an article that popped up that was basically about Japanese game developers discussing tutorials and how they're implemented in games. because I think it started from a programmer in particular that used to work at Square and S&K, talking about how they looked at the dropout rate of players in their games,

and they thought that people were getting stuck at the tutorial and then realized that people were barely reading them in the first place and getting annoyed because it stopped them from getting into the game more often. and I guess after it took a while, but some devs are catching up to the fact that a lot of players hate tutorials and don't look for them until they absolutely have to. Yeah, but a lot of players are fucking stupid. There's this. There's this.

Also, a lot of players are let's playing and need help when you can't find your way up to the bell tower. And then I was like, no, fuck it. They're fucking stupid. So I've often said this. And even booting up, you know, like recent fighting games to XCO, all these other things that are coming out now, there's always a moment I have where when you force them, the player, when you force the game into a, hey, let me explain what a fighting game is and

how it works mode. And I'm like, there's ways to do this without stopping the fun, right? there's ways to do this in every genre without just putting a brakes on everything and go and sit here and get lecture to for 10 minutes before we get to it and I think like what I would love that just doesn't happen often.

Every once in a while someone kind of does it but you don't see it often is just make sure that the person playing can move and do all the things immediately and get a feel for what's happening right away. Just have them moving and pressing buttons and doing things and just enjoying the system learning how to climb, jump off the walls,

do whatever the fucking you need to do, just put them into a sandbox immediately, right? Or if it needs to be the first level, do that too. I think something where you can essentially approach something and press like, you know, a button for context, press your touch pad or whatever to get a breakdown if you'd like it is a reasonable way to go. But I, and there's people that definitely do ignore things and would just ignore it and keep moving. But like, I hate the feeling of stopping and starting and I think a lot of people do too, you know?

Um, it, especially in a game where like a fighter, it feels really bad to just, uh, uh, fucking get the brakes pumped all the time. Looks like Twitch just disconnected. Oh, is that happening to you as well? Yep. But we're still connected. Therefore, my, the internet's fine. So, uh, I think Twitch is crashing my internet.

internet. Fucking sick. Because I'll lose my connection to Twitch and then my internet will go down, but I'll have, I'll stay logged in on YouTube until the last possible second. Amazing. Amazing. So isn't that great? Yeah. And so I'll be multi-streaming and Twitch will go down like zero frames a second. YouTube chugging along no problem. Yep. So massive, massive red bars and like thousands and thousands and thousands of frames lost. YouTube doesn't even get a single frame lost. And I go to the stream health and it says that it says, yeah, stream health excellent. Yeah, no. So, I mean, we talked right through it, but we're back on Twitch now.

But our call never dropped or disconnected whatsoever. Yeah, no. So someone in the chat says, why is it only Pat? It is not only Pat. We are right here. You just watch me more often. Thank you. we this the the the call continued uninterrupted

Twitch itself just took a shit and came back so we're back Um like if I was streaming exclusively on YouTube you would be like wow pat really improved his internet crazy anyway um yeah so so that that's that's basically it you know and we've seen different iterations of this over the years and I think we're gonna continue to because unfortunately anytime someone comes up with a great quality of life solution to something in video games design-wise, it takes- Everyone ignores it for like 10 years. It takes two generations before it becomes normalized. Yeah.

I actually played a bunch of games of bad tutorials recently and like the number one thing is like, hey, don't like... The number one thing I would add to any tutorial is don't lock me in, don't like stop it and lock me in place and then make me read something. just give me a challenge that I can't die but also can't get past until I do the thing you're asking. Ah, okay. So if there's like a, hey, you need to double jump, right? Don't freeze the game.

Right, right, right. And say, this is how you double jump and force me to double jump. Have a fucking marker on the screen that goes, this is how to double jump, and then force me to fucking double jump to get out of the room. Yep, yep.

There's a, there's, yeah, the platformers where it's like, you have to, you come across a wall that requires you to, to jump over it the correct way. Absolutely. That's, that's, want to teach me how to do headshots?

Have me fight an enemy that can only take damage from headshots. But if you can teach the player while they can continue to play the game and continue touching and interfacing and getting used to the feel of things, that's way more fun, way better than fucking stop and, gr, momentum kill. Someone in the chat said Monster Hunter needs tutorials.

I think it's really funny because Monster Hunter, tutorials still have not improved. They've actually just made the game easier. Oh, yeah. Like, like, instead of, like, putting the work into, like, oh, let's teach people how to actually do this. They would either give you, like, a bunch of fucking missions one after another that teach you things really slowly, or they would just make the game easier.

Like the, the, the, the fucking low rank in Wilds doesn't teach you shit. it's just easy. Well, I mean, isn't the whole bit that, like, low rank is the tutorial or whatever? No, but, like, no, for real, though. But actually. Like a million different little mechanics. No, and so that's it. I think that that gets to the core of it.

Also, for going further in depth, if you want to learn about stuff or whatever, have a place where people can do that, you know? Like, you can opt in to more information if you'd like to. But, yeah, just allowing any game, any time I'm playing something, I just want to remain in control of the sandbox and getting the feel for things while learning about what's going on. The momentum kill is such a bad feeling and no wonder people fucking hate it, you know? Like there was a reason that like back in the 7th gen, you had a huge amount of like first person shooters that had like a fake tutorial that was part of your character's military orientation. Sure, sure, sure.

That was like, boot up, look up, look down. We need to test you out. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And look down. Aim their gun. Aim down sights. Oh, there you go. Guess what? It worked. It worked really well. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Military fucking basic training for your configs. Because it had like it, it had like an in-universe context that made like made sense. The press either direction to go up or down was a hell of a trick where it's like you invert. I think it's a really smart thing. You invert your controls because whatever naturally you do first is correct. That's that's really. They go, hey, look up. Was that correct? No, I wasn't. Okay, invert it. Very smart. That was smart.

Very smart. That was a clever way to do that. Yeah. Like, don't tell me tutorials don't work when everyone in here knows that switching to your sidearm is faster than reloading. It is. God, that fucking Mario clip that's that everyone that's going around. I don't know why people are so obsessed with it because maybe I've seen too many of them. Yeah. It's not the first time that joke has been made, you know.

I think my favorite one is like the Silent Hill, too. by Ubisoft where it's just like a fucking nightmare mess of bullshit all over the fucking screen. Everyone, yeah, everyone's going to the focus end.

But what's the one he says right at the end? That's the last thing he said. I feel like the last thing he's... I only watched it the one time. The last thing he says was like, oh, that's right on point. It's like, all right,

let's party or something like that. You know? Like, yeah. I still think that one of my favorite, I love it when Debs in this industry throw shade. They used to throw shade way more often. And now everyone's like all social media conscious and shit and it's fucking bullshit.

But like I remember when a bunch of Ubisoft people started like dogging on Eldon Rings interface. I don't know how this this incredible game could have like the worst interface ever. And it was like the most sour grape shit you've ever seen. And I'm pretty sure it was in direct response to the Eldon Ring by Ubisoft. soft memes. Oh, yeah, the over-tutorialized

screenshot with the looking out over Limgrave. It's like, hey, guys, maybe if you didn't flood your games

with a bunch of superfluous shit, you would need all this mess all over the fucking screen. But also, I want to say that there's probably

like five or six stories we've covered over the years of like Horizon Dev that also complain, and that's true. Of like Dev's shitting, like AAA devs shit. getting on from soft salt salt from soft takes that used to come out there were so many right whether

it was about whether it's um articles that were like it's time for boss fights to go the way of the dinosaur so i i you know i i i went back and tried to find those i i went back and tried to find those yeah yeah and i have to go off of my memory and my memory's fallible so it's possible that wrong. But I believe, let me check the year. Uncharted 2 came out in 2009. Mass Effect 2 came out in 2010 and Arkham Asylum came out in 2009. It was an article written in 2010 after Mass Effect 2 came out. and it was and it was it's time to give up on boss fights or something and they basically compared bioshock one mass effect two uncharted to an arkham asylum and said the final bosses of all these games are terrible and they totally ruin a great experience i don't even know why and it was the it was like the most like western game

pilled, like anti-East Asian game development fucking cringe-ass shit article. And everyone mocked it for a reason. And it got extra stupid. Because I think the next year in 2011 is when Arkham City came out and Arkham City boss fights kick ass. Arkham City has one of the best boss fights

of that generation. Boss fights need to die, says man holding a gun and a ball. like holy copy of boss baby holy shit man that's it's so like you're in your corner

and you see nothing else the wildest takes the best part of video games the exam you take at the end of learning your mechanics and trying them out the the final exam

yeah fuck that get rid of that shit um yeah and then there was you know there's the difficulty takes there was the um the get good takes and the the the a bunch of stuff that first souls games were doing i want there was at least

i'm at this point four to five articles of just salt that we covered i feel like i've crystallized my exact point of view every time this thing comes up and it'll come up with dustbloods again and someone's going to say there there's going to be two wolves right one wolf is going to say I think that from soft games should have an easy mode. And I'm going to go, no, that's stupid. And then the next person will say, I think it would be really cool if they had an easy mode. And I go, oh, yeah, that's cool.

The word should is carrying all the weight for me. I see. See, for me, it's just like, well, yeah, they do. You summon somebody that jumps in there and makes the fight easier. hey look there's your difficulty mode you know like if you're self-imposing it what about Sekaro if you're self-imposing it

then what about Sekaro that doesn't have you can't summon people in Sekiro The actual answer is they want Seqoro to be hard as shit Sure for everybody Go grind get a billion fucking huge strong come back and one shot

everything There you know yeah um it is a it is but it was like that was an era that was a full on era and like oh don't worry it'll come back it comes back every time cyclical every single fucking time well but the idea but the the whole like um the from soft hate in particular it's like they have definitively won at this point so you you look more clown than ever yeah every game comes out and does more numbers the last one. Like, it's like as you're yelling

about how much you hate the boss fights, Mo's like, I can't, I can't hear you. What's that homo? I can't. So much money coming in from this Eldon Ring. I can't what's that? You just lost yourself. Like, it's just, like, you know, Miyazaki's fucking drowning in it

as they're yelling about it. It just doesn't work anymore. So um, anyways. Wait, hold on. There's a PC gaming article this year. about getting rid of boss fights. Oh boy.

Oh, boy. Are you fucking serious? You know, what's the name of the fucking article? It's just, like, the climax of the movie is so over with. Oh, wow. Yeah, I'm reading it right now. It's time that the movie climax goes the way of the dinosaur.

Aren't we just over the high point? So this is, this is obvious rage bait. I'm going to get baited. I hate boss fights, and you'll never convince me that they're good because they're not. Boss fights are a tedious holdover from a long ago era and we'd be better off without them. And there's a picture of Artorius on the screen. That's amazing. That's incredible.

That's that. Hey, you clicked. You clicked? They got their click. That is incredible. A pointless blocker of progress. A button-mashing equivalent of a maze in an adventure game. A tiresome chore serving no purpose but to pat out the clock.

I mean, I'm seeing them sipping their coffee with their sweater just like typing it in going, like upload this one. It's like either you're rage baiting or you seem like a little baby. No. That's a different rage bag. But we know, you know exactly what it is. This is somebody who's like, oh, this is annoying. And then they get the keyboard out.

it's annoying turns into dial it up. As we know, exaggeration is entertainment. This is not too my taste becomes actually. You're stupid. I'm thinking of the specific people I know where it's like, yeah, you have that mild version of the take in your head. And then when it's time to write it down on paper, we got to get you paying attention. So here we go. You know, in before your fucking.

counter arguments. Also, I only play one type of game. Good stuff. All right. Well, in any case, um, you know, not much else going on. Um, and I, I truly didn't feel like going into 15 other AI related stories. I'm fucking burnt out on it. So, yeah, they're doing a lot of AIs in your video games. I, I honestly just don't care to, to pull it, pull it in unless it's, it's particular. You should probably assume, particularly if the developers from Japan, they're going to use a little AI as a treat. Yep. Oh, yeah, no, true. I was going to pop in surprise Dragon Ball Fighters mod before Wanted Dead on Saturday.

So the same creator that made Dio for Dragon Ball Fighters has made fucking Yugi from Yu-Gi-O. and these are the most insane overhaul mod characters ever because they're completely faithful and have their own systems. So Dio doesn't play like a Dragon Ball character. He plays like a Jojo character in Dragon Ball Fighters. I'm going to look this up right now. And now Yugi has cards and a card system and multiple monsters and a whole fucking bit he does

where he's just super accurate. Wow. Um, Yugi and Dragon Ball did not get the results I wanted. Yugi DBFZ is probably what you want to do. There we go. Insanely impressive mod work. Like one person took him a year to do it. So, yep.

Wow, this is impressive. Yep. The moders, the moders are doing, doing God's work out there. Amazing shit. And I mean, you know, we saw what happened with the Marvel 3 and Marvel Infinite modtering people and stuff. And some of them gone on to work on their own projects too, for example,

wistful hopes who did a bunch of crazy mods for putting Goku in games where Goku doesn't belong. Like Strive and Dragon Ball. Not Dragon Ball. Mod some other stuff. Marvel as well. He's working on a Saturday morning Saturday a.m.

Fighting game, I think it's called, or something like that. New fighting game that I just got announced. So yeah, the modders are doing some cool shit. Um, go-go-go. Gonna peep out that, that,

uh, that, that, that, uh, now that there's two, I'm like, okay, that's worth looking into.

Needs to be a third one so you can do a whole team. You can do a whole team. Exactly. Yeah. Um, so, and there's even, what I'm always interested in to is like how they implement them,

the game. Because is it a case where you have to just replace a character that exists entirely? Uh, or do you have an elegant way to select them? Because not every game allows a mod that puts extra slots into the game. and they did something really elegant here, which is hold a trigger button

to get the original character on that slot. So Dio gets replaced by Cell or Cell gets replaced by Dio, but if you hold triggers, you can get back the original picks and stuff like that, you know? So yeah, that's a pretty nice way, you don't, so you don't lose anything.

Unfortunately, though, I think it means that, like, you can't pick both at the same time. Oh, that's a bummer because, like, I won't play cell. Yeah, so, you know, these are the limitations. You've got to pick a slot to override. And Yugi replaces Android 17. Anyways, cool stuff. All right, let's take some letters.

Hey, if you want to send them a letter, send it to Castle Super Beastmail at Gmail.com. That's Castle Superbeastmail at gmail.com. Bup, bupup, bup. Okay, let's see here. We have one coming in. This is the last letters of the year. Somebody's right, wow. Oh, yeah, I guess so.

Oh, I hope it's such a good one to end the year on. It's not just the email equivalent of dick butt. Ocean Blow says, hello, Pooley, and Watt. My friend has, my friend goes so, my friend goes so had. Such a good email. With his take that any game can be considered an RPG. So hard he will say Tetris. can be an RPG.

Are you playing the role of someone playing Tetris? How hard can I call him a dumbass? Your friend's an idiot, but he's not going to budge because he's technically correct through linguistics, but he's not correct through like actual use of genre term. Because we have come to a place where video games have been around long enough that we know what the genres are, but their naming are all terrible. Yeah, no, this is the kind of moron that you'll talk to and you'll be like, hey, don't eat that.

That's not food. And he's like, well, I can chew it up and put it in my mouth. mouth and swallow it, that makes it food. And then you get into the most shit-ass semantic argument that's existed and just let your friend eat the batteries. Just don't stop them. If you

want live in front of you just an easy demonstration of how terrible our video game naming conventions are, go to Steam and click on the word It's the worst. Fighting. Click on the word fighting and just see what pops up.

It's absolute nonsense. Does this game have conflict in it? I guess that's a fighting game. Like, it's so insane. Labels are dumb for video games. They're dumber than ever. RPGs are based off of like early visual novels in Japan or Dungeons and Dragons. And like that's the two simultaneous things in video games.

And things flow from those genres and those genre designations and specifications in history. But whatever, man. It's borderlands RPG because it got numbers. Tabletop. Is fucking our card games table top games? Are they not played on the top of a table? Shit.

They are. I think Steam tags are awesome, but I think Steam tags are run by insane people who don't know what the fuck a genre is. And as we just established, IMDB guy will fight you forever and then die before

you can correctly update any of these tags. So, all right. What a great email. Trevor. Trevor says, Dear Pizza Cutter and Snatch.

The move, not the slang. Yeah. I share Willie's joy in seeing the passage of time in video games, especially when it leads to protege characters being made. It gives devs a good reason to mix up the gameplay formula in a significant way without fully discarding the game's core ideas. I also realize this is done with non-protej characters to a similar extent to I can't quite understand.

What do you think is the difference between protege characters like Nero and non-protechers? It can't even think of a name like Zero Mega Man X who shake up the formula in their respective games. Is it just a difference of flavor, visual or story-wise? And then what are examples that you like in the genre? So I would say that your distinction there with Zero is that Nero is a protege in that he inherits the role, whereas I would call Zero a co-star. Yeah, X inherits the role from Zero. Well, X inherits from Mega Man, you know.

But if you have two playable characters, I mean, yeah, the beginning of Mega Man X-1, yes. But whenever you have multiple playable characters, you're talking about a co-star. You're talking about like, you know, somebody who shows you a different way to play the formula of the game that you've gotten used to. But that doesn't necessarily mean that he is. the future of the franchise, you know? Yeah, but, like, Nero's a good example because Nero is obviously built to one day, like, usurp Dante as the main character. The successor.

And succeed him. Meanwhile, you've got, like, Resident Evil, which is the series of anti-proteges, where you're like, oh, we got a new character. Why do we have a new character? We have a new character because we don't want to play as old women. That's the... Oh, no! Oh, that's the reason!

So like, literally, hold on. So I remember you said this before, but like none of the aged up veterans have included the girls yet, except Ada. Except for Ada, who's Chinese, and that's fine. She's aging well. And Jill, who is mutated by Wesker's experience.

And blonde now. Yeah. So she's blonde and is not aging. That's so crazy. That's so crazy. Meanwhile, holy. meanwhile in, I got to look up when

R&6 came out. Resident Evil takes a Resident Evil takes place in like more or less modern day. Right? So, Sherry Birkin is approximately 10 years old in

1998. 14 years later, she becomes a playable character in Resident Evil 6 in her mid-20s. That was 13 years ago, which would make Sherry Burkin in her 30s,

which means we will never see her again. Claire would be what, 50, 45? Claire is 20 in 98. So she'd be 27. She'd be 47. Okay. Can we just... Leon is 48.

Okay, but can we... We could also just inject Claire with the goop. Nope, never happened. We can do it. It ain't too late. Nope. Nope, that's why... No, Jill got hit with the goop.

Yeah, but do it to Claire too then. just all of them. Ada's Chinese is different. That's it. That's it. That's the canon reason. Swear to God.

And again, the law of Chunli, you know, you just make the makeup a little stronger. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, that's, that's it, though. You can have, you can have co-stars. You could have successors, you know, and they don't share the same space necessarily. And in some cases,

you can, like, You don't have to replace the franchise entirely, but you can imagine the story being like, we're going to follow this character from now on. However, as... It gets so bad in Resident Evil that in order to create a new female character, they literally jump the Resident Evil timeline forward decades into like the 2040s to play a female character who has grown up. We have to go in a portal.

And that character will never return. Oh, my God. Never. Never. That's so incredible. Which, like, it shows off that, like, the... So, okay, I'll just... I'm going to talk about the D.L.C. for Resident Evil 8, okay? The DL.C for Resident Evil 8 has you playing as Rose...

What's... Ethan's name, Ethan, Ethan, Ethan Winters. He plays Rose Winters, the baby, grown up into an adult. Okay. Or like a young teenager,

right? In 2040-ish, and bio-shit is still a problem. So that means when you play Res Evil Requiem, you know the problem's not going to get solved. The bioterrorism remains an issue for at least 10, 15 fucking more years.

The cowardice is so surprising. considering like a meanwhile over here like lady and trish are getting up there you know okay well trish is a devil yeah but she looks and um she looks grown and lady ladies shut up yeah she you know but but this is a different franchise you know um in in any case um i think one thing's for certain is I would not be mad at the game that featured Nero replacing Dante, but I know that you would, it would be a bad idea to make a Devil May Cry game without a Dante in it. They would have to have like two new characters that were that blew people to fuck away. Or unlock him and it's not a story thing, but he's still here for fun. Yeah, he's still there.

Right. You know, you do the story, you walk back to the bar, you kick the door in, and he's like, hey! And then you Jen, then Dante's not playable, right? No, you know, it's Nero and Tony Redgrave. Sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, exactly. Yeah, yeah, that's fine. And he just happens to play just like Dante. But I would not hate the torch pass in the way, you know, that, like, leads into this, because Nero's fucking rules.

I would potentially not play bayonetta for. Like, I might just skip it. Oh, if it's Viola? Viola only. Oh, I'm not planning that. No way. Could you imagine? And it's not just because I strongly dislike the character.

It's not because she has the shittiest action game fit ever. Like, that scarf and glasses got awful. Just, just trash. It's because she's a way. less fun character to play than Panetta. Done and done. Done and done. She is way, way worse at every level.

Yo, the game. They had to patch her to be better in an action game. Violetta. That's, I don't, I just don't want that. I don't want it at all. I would, I would rather play fucking Atreus as the main character of God of War than goddamn Violetta. or whatever the fucker name is in Beio.

And I don't even particularly like Atreus. And the thing is, too, is like the difference between I showed up for this, I got this, and oh, look, there were bonus other fun playable characters versus the main, the meat is gone. And all you have is the extra, you know? Yeah, you got to, unless you completely overhaul everything about her. That which is also, excuse me, potentially viable, but fuck. that. I would rather play Totech. Is his name Totech? Totech? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, Tootek.

Yeah, yeah. A new Tomb Raider game, then Lara Croft, then fucking play as Viola in a new Bannetta game. Play as the other girl instead of Samanoske, in Onimusha, for the whole game. Kai-day? Yeah.

Fuck it. Fuck it. I can't believe I remember that game. That's a wild. That's wild. I played it not that long ago and didn't have shit. I've been playing that game in like 20 years. That's crazy that you pulled that out, especially considering how bad she plays. Yeah, she's a way worse version.

The game is not fun. It's, it's, it was, hey, Onamusha 1 was way, way more fun in 2006. Onomusha 2 probably holds up. I mean, you know, like, R.E.4, it's like, okay, you switch characters so that you can establish the feeling of helplessness before you get back to being in control and fucking dominating everything. That's not what they were going for here. Here it was like, no, she's got tech and stuff and can do her own moves and just is infinitely more annoying. Anyway, all right. And let's take one last one here from Agro Will. Hey, Agro Will.

Dear Pooby and Wobie, what are the worst times you've drawn parallels or used terms when talking about subjects that have nothing to do with games? You all love to break down almost everything into FGC speak. Guilty is charged. I try not to. Because, but there are instances where you stop and go, oh, no, I'm way too deep in and this is just nonsense to any other human beings. the worst for me is sometimes is something I can't get out of my head I'm not masturbating

I'm labbing my dick I'm not even a fighting game fan that's just purely brain rot from listening to you too Happy New Year and may your moves always be plus or minus or whatever they're supposed to be So all I can say to this is like there's the times where

the brain rot is real and it's just like I'm grabbing for an analogy of what I know and what I know is fucking the archives running through here. Sure. However, the thing with the FGC in particular is that like a lot of the time it's super funny in the FGC to use, to compare shit in real life to some dumb, like tech or some, to use those words. It's sometimes the funniest thing to do at any given moment is just drop a term.

that should not apply there, which is, to be honest, our entire humor style. A little bit. Right? So, like, oh, like, oh, shit, you know, like, someone literally was describing how they went on a date with somebody, and there were so many red flags that they had to backdash out of their life. Just like, you know, like, there's things where it's just, it shortcuts to it, and it's funny.

But I remember at one point when I was talking to, when I was recording with Min, and I was trying to break down the difference between our humor and how, like, his type of humor versus is my type of humor and how it sort of works. And I was kind of going, it's the same thing every time. It's take the subject you're looking at and then take a thing that it vaguely resembles from pop culture somewhere, mix them together. And then that's obvious, but not that funny in and of itself. So what you have to do is go to a supporting character from thing A and a supporting character

from Thing B and fuse those and then this is the funny thing because the first layer is duh the second layer is ah what the fuck are we doing like that's it you know you just it's the same thing every time you fusion and then you go to the supporting or two or even three steps away

to get the actual punchline every single time it's not that deep it's very predictable it's not about uh uh uh Mario and Tony Soprano it's about Luigi and

fucking Sill, you know, or or fucking Maltesanti. And then to that extent, fucking Carmine and Bowser. Whatever. You know what I mean? Like it just,

you run, you run further away with it. It's stupid. You've completely lost me. Okay. Like, like 100%. That's okay.

You've like 100% completely lost me. That's okay. That's fine. I'm going to hurt myself in the fucking confusion. That, that, no problem. But hey, when I, Wario and Big Puss.

All right? Okay. Yeah. That's, that's what it is. Because now, like, the first, the first layer of that is nothing. But you go to Wario and Big Puss, and that's actually fucking, whatever the fuck that is, is closer to what I'm talking about. It's not the first layer. It's the third step away from the fusion concept that becomes the punchline.

And you go back through best friends history, and that's every fucking joke ever made. Whether you like it or not, that's what it is. Who's big puss? Like, what? What? Better yet, if the character has a voice, then you could start doing the voice of thing A and apply it to the words of thing B.

Right? So you take, you, you know, that's, that's all you got to do. You got to, you, you, you, you start doing. It's just mad libs. I think you're just describing madlips. But it's, it's, it's even dumber. Well, what if Richard Nixon was doing your tour guide? But it's like, it's like big puss getting fucking off and then going,

wah, wah, audio, and then coins pop out, you know? Like, it's just, you just, you,

it's the same reason. To the audio only listener, I'm staring with my eyes glazed over and my mouth agape, shaking my head a little bit, just like, it's the reason why Tony Soprano holding a gun from Halo is very funny. Sopranos, Italians.

It's fun. It's the reason why. hold Tony Soprano holding the halo fucking Arbiter gun is funny The blade are like That's it That's all The Tony

Tony Tony I think what's actually way funnier than anything you said Was you said the Halo Arbiter gun And I'm trying to figure out what the fucking mean by No because Arbiter holds

The has the blade It's the but he the the fucking covenant gun You know Whatever the gun that That You mean the sword? No no He's shooting the, um, is it, is it the dart?

The spiker? I think it's a spiker. I don't remember what it's name, but I think he should needler, need one of those, one of those, yeah, okay. Hey, it's Quigon. Hey, it's Quan Chi. Hello. I don't know why that. I legit, I've gone back.

Hello, Quigon from Star Wars and Quan Chi from Mortal Kombat. I remember that moment. I don't know if you even, like, I said Quigon Chi once. That's it. And Matt and I just started laughing from. like 10 minutes and I thought there was like a setup to it but there was nothing no it was it was just the idea of kwanji's face yes on like the pyre with everyone crying that just like it just killed my ass and so I had to I remember I sat down and explained to min I was like that's all our jokes are

there's nothing special going on here it's just the same thing over and over it just like a version of wouldn't that be silly that's it and that's all if this thing is not supposed to be this thing, but what if Aryan resurrection? That's it. This reminds me. I was watching some old Northern Lion clips, and he broke down, like, his version of this exact discussion. He's like, do you want to know how you become the next Northern Lion? See something stupid someone in your chat said and act like it's destroying society.

Just fill down on this dumb little thing. That's great. Problem with society. Get it fucking twisted. Get it twisted. And once he said that, I'm like, oh my God. Every clip I've ever seen you. That's really good.

That's really good. Yep. Yep. There you go. I'm telling you. I'm telling you. Like, once you distill our shit down to its most core, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, There's nothing under the wheel here.

There's hamsters. You guys can do it too. It's really easy. Take two concepts, vaguely related, and jump two steps further. All right. I think that is actually the style of humor,

that Mario Metal Gear thing. What if Mario but serious? Yeah. The entirety of the fucking thousand-year door LP is literally just that. you know like every single moment of every all of all of our humor the whole final fantasy 10 play through rides on the concept of what if waka lived in the real world and was actually a klu klux clan member that's all we had going for every episode you know and you put you put

it was solid though you put you put the racist things that they say into fucking wigwaka's voice and you get gold. That's it! Right? It's not enough for him to be racist against the albed. He has to be the most racist. What's the most racist thing in our world? In that context?

These assholes, okay. Where do you go from there? It's not the literal what's happening to the albed. You put him in the fucking clan outfit. You know? And then what do you do next? You start asking questions, brunta. You start saying and using the weird fucking vagaries

and online race realism talk that people use online and you just put him into that place because race realist is another step away from clan member in terms of going to, like what's silly about funny and racist shit, right? So it's not the obvious thing

about the racism against the al-Bed. It's the guys online theory crafting. It's like, hey, did you know that Al-Bed do 80% of the crimes in Spira despite making 12% of the population? Fucking, you know what I mean? Like, yeah. It's gonna fucking a fuckena. Right?

Despite people, being 12% of the population, they do 49% of the crimes, brother. Like, it's just, I'm just saying, you know? Like, it's just that- Why are you Yogi Bear now? Did you hear that? No. You're fucking backslid into full-blown yogi.

Hey, boo-boo. And now I'm, Boo-boo, what the fuck is going? We got to end this show. This show sucks. 1488, boo-boo. No. Don't do that. No.

Don't do that. Fucking Yogi. That fucking juke on me. God damn it, yogi!