Castle Super Beast - SBFC 084: Should I Stop Masturbating?

Episode Date: March 17, 2015

Man, Google Feud is great. All we need this week are mechs and Google Feud.

Never stopped. Never turned around on me. Okay. Just like Skullgirls never did. Yeah, because Skullgirls is like a fighting game. That you hated until you played it. You hated until you played it. Actually, Conan's theme looks fine. Actually, no, hold on.

I hated until I played it because there was a character that I finally thought was cool on the roster. Also, we forced you. And you saw that the system is fucking great. Yeah, but if Big Band was not in that game, I would still like... He wasn't when we played, was he? No, and I didn't, like, I didn't get into it until Big Band came out. Big Band was in the video we did. Because Big Band is very recent.

I cared about Skullgirls. But you can feel the... It's like Killer Instinct. Where I totally wrote it off right up until Spinal came out. But the moment where you replied and you went like... That shit. Why, you'd like Codename Steam if you just tried it. That looks pretty cool.

This game's fucking awesome. I think that looks super stupid. It's super cool. The moment you were like... America doesn't like Skullgirls. America just shitted a tear on the screen. The moment you went, oh shit Pat, was when like... I think it was like a cerebellum match or whatever.

And you were like, oh. So like, yeah, Big Band. But also besides Big Band, it's a fucking great game. It is a great game. Now, what's confusing is why is Codename Steam getting mixed reviews, Liam? Because there's that period at the end of your turn where you have to wait like 30 seconds to a minute. To watch the enemies move. And there's no speeding.

There's no speed up. Could you speed that up in XCOM? Like the original XCOM? No, you can do any... Okay, hold on, hold on. When you said original XCOM, do you mean the original... He means the original XCOM release? Or the one from like 15, 20 years ago?

Original. Okay, nobody knows. Because that game's a million years old. I played it back in the day. You couldn't do anything in original XCOM. The best point of reference is Fire Emblem Awakening where you could. Yeah. Oh, that's true.

And the modern XCOM in which if enemies are... Like, it'll go. But if enemies are behind Fog of War, it skips their turns and just teleports them. Yeah. If they are at Fog of War, it's like... The scale is at least nice enough to put a meter on the bottom of this screen. Yeah. Telling you how far through their turn you were.

Well, what Vandai's been doing for years now is like on your map with an SRW or a Nelquist game, the guy comes up to you and it's like, quick, skip, map, or watch the whole thing. Like flashing on the screen. And you can just have the guy crash into your little avatar or chessboard thing. And a number pops up and then it's gone. Yeah. The only difference in Codename Steam and maybe why they're doing it is because the camera's locked to a third person perspective and that's on purpose.

Yeah. So you can't just look at the end of the map and see all the enemy. Yeah, totally. So I think they want you to observe and take it all in, but for some people it's a killer. How long does... How many enemies are on an average map? Maybe 10 to 12. And how many guys do you have?

Four at most. Four and how long? But there's 10 to 12 and some of the maps have waves that keep coming in. And how long would you say the average mission takes? 15, 20. The short one's 10. Okay. But like you're spending a good amount of time there.

But like 25% of that is watching the enemy phase. 20, 25. 20%? That kind of... That's like a big jump. What saves the game is like the varied mechanics that all the other characters have. Like since there's so much verticality in this game, like the lion can climb up and you have characters with grenade launchers that can shoot over stuff.

And even the healers are like gun healers. So is it classes or is it just unique characters? Each character's unique and there's 12 and then there's the fire and moon characters as well. Okay. Two of which are unavailable right now. The thing about the reviews is that it says it has no style and it's flat and boring. And then another review says this game has funky things. Thank you.

And then the other reviews are just like it has so much style and personality. I love it. I don't like the style but it's like clearly super on the nose like stylish. Dude, when you start the game it starts in first person in a kid's room. And he walks to a desk and opens a comic book. That's pretty good. Like Nellieck doesn't have style, project iron fall. That third person, that's something I would consider that has no style.

What are you talking about? Boring, sci-fi, realistic third person shooter? That's not style to you? Oh wait, it's not. Being forced to watch enemy movement is annoying. But that shouldn't be like dock this game by 20 points. It's like do you like tactical RPGs? Yeah, you'll probably really enjoy this game.

If you don't then you'll hate this game more than any other one. But it's like... There's a couple of IGN reviews in the past where it's like I hate fighting games. I give this fighting game a 1. This fighting game doesn't have enough single player content. Why did the US get assigned this game? No one else was going to take it. Like I reference it to Double Dragon Neon review by IGN and he goes,

I hate beat em ups, they were always lame. I give this 3 out of 10 just as good as as fucking God hands. Like someone we know that was involved with like writing stuff for like magazines and like one-up and things like that has like explained how there's a process of you see a list of everything that needs to be reviewed and then people just one by one jump and go, yeah, I guess I'll grab this. Yeah, I guess I'll grab that.

And for stuff that doesn't get grabbed, they grab it and they throw it at you. Whoever you may be. Somebody needs to review Barbie horse adventures. I don't want to do it. Well, I outrank you so you're going to do it. Hey, sports writer, enjoy reviewing this guy a 5. And that's like a sport.

Yeah, exactly. Stuff that people don't want to do gets forced onto people that don't want to do it and then they have to give it a start. Review away. So just keep that in mind, you know. What was the giant bomb connect thing when it first came out the original? Rider meets horse. Rider meets horse, horse meets rider.

Yeah. Thank you. That's the thing that you fucking, when you met Gershman at Captivate, like kind of shoved in his face and he looked like he was going to die. You're a jerk. No, you'll have to actually. Oh yeah. No, no, he said Ryan was back there doing fucking connect games all day.

There's some great videos of just those connect Ryan days of John Bombshake. No, just. Up there on YouTube. It says I'm a couch. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Ryan God bless his soul.

Connecting came out. He was always there and he's like, I'm going to play it. It's going to be great. Oh no, it's not. He knew where the money was at. Hey guys, this is episode 84 of the podcast. I thought we were like at 87. I thought you were going to say 91 and I realized I'm way off.

Yeah. No, we're now, what do we, what happened in 84? Nothing really. We weren't alive so it doesn't matter. Yeah. 84. Wait, 1984? 84.

Oh, this is the one where the podcast has to have a super, super, super rigid structure and we break in all the people who sent us emails, email addresses and read them. Right. Thought crimes. Yeah. Yeah. We're watching. The crimes are happening.

We're recording this podcast on an Apple device. Yep. Yep. All right. So that's stupid ad. Don't you remember? Yeah. Sure.

Apple teach you why 1984 won't be like 1984. Okay. Stacking up the sandbags. So, I like that. I like that. Sandbags. Sandbags. Sandbags.

Sandbag is when you say nothing. But when you say, I am sandbagging you. That's annoying. But I'm preparing for future sandbags simultaneously. And we established that sandbagging is level one and stonewalling is level two. Stonewalling. Yeah. Absolutely.

New levels. Nothing can leap through. Not only am I going to not dignify this now, but I will never dignify it in the future. And then who should there be at level three? Not yet. Level three is just murder. Level three is like silence to the point where the person who said it forgot what they said. And it never happened.

And it vanishes from mind. It's exactly. Let's say you stonewall. King Crimson shit. Yeah, that makes sense. Yeah. Let's say you stonewall and you put up three stonewalls and then you wall crash. And then you like some joke breaks down all the walls.

Ah, gone wrong. That is sick. That is sick. All right. A joke get funnier? Yeah. And it's a 12. Yeah.

So. But if it's a bad joke and you get crashed through the walls. So that's the game. The realest of real talks is my week has been dedicated to Mecca week. I've had no time to do anything. You've been dedicated. But record and edit every day. Absolutely.

The one thing I managed to do in between besides check out my book. I know what it is. A little bit of Gundam, whatever as usual. But I checked out Unbreakable. The Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt. Yeah, you did. The Tina Fey show. Oh.

And I'm happy to announce that shit is totally picking up where 30 Rock left off. Are you saying that Tina Fey touches gold? No, fuck it. I fucked it up. Let me start this over. You fucked it up. Are you saying that Tina Fey knows how to write good? As long as she does the writing and her husband makes the music.

You got yourself a thing that's not going to fail. Yeah. Is this thing on Netflix? Yeah. I'll just jump in. I'll just jump in. I also finished Kimmy Schmidt. Oh nice.

I was just marathonic. It's such an easy watch. It's like 30 Rock. Yeah, it's like 30 Rock. Remember when we were talking about Brooklyn Nine-Nine and you got a couple episodes in? Yeah, totally. I got a couple episodes in and I dropped it off. It wasn't feeling it, man.

I'm on 23 episodes in Brooklyn Nine-Nine. And you're still going? I finished it. As of last night. And you're still on board? I fucking love it. I finished it. I absolutely fucking love it.

The ending totally has a hook. Okay. And we never said Brooklyn Nine-Nine isn't great. It didn't sink. It didn't sink. The idea of Andy Samberg being Andy Samberg. But he's not being Andy Samberg. In a world that's closer to normal in which everyone's like Andy, stop, stop.

Stop being Andy Samberg. But he's being like TV Andy. Yes, of course he is. It's on television. I know, but awesome town of Andy's. Andy is a loser. But in the show he's like bedding living all the time. The player loves him.

No, no. That's not true. Well, no, I just mean like. No, you're wrong. No, that's completely wrong. Anyway. Stonewall this man. It's all office politics.

Everyone's like Andy, Andy, you're not Andy. The only thing that he does is bring in lots of cases. Every aspect of that character is a fucking mess aside from work performance. But if you're right about Andy Samberg, he's not the star of that. No. It's the captain who's the star. And it's Terry Crews actually just playing Terry Crews on TV. He's not a great actor.

I don't care. I love Terry Crews. I love him too. He's like a big adorable muscle with a face. He's sticking Brooklyn Nine-Nine with his daughters. It's pretty funny though. The amount of sight gags where he just grabs an object and crushes it in his hand and gets all muscly, that's the best. And I wouldn't mind going back and continuing maybe at some point.

Instead of like explaining away all the specifics, I'll just say I wasn't laughing. And that's all it comes down to is that I'm not really laughing. Also Willie, the captain is not Bunny Colvin. No, I know. You are insane. Absolutely. Yeah, I know. I got corrected on that.

It's wrong. They look nothing alike. Okay. Well. A very good commission, it's like very, like not like the entire thing is obscure humor, but there's some jokes in there. Like they talk about Hulkamania. They talk about Gizmo from Gremlins.

They talk about the Montreal Expos. Okay. They didn't drop that. Oh, good. Good. I didn't get there yet. They'll never go away. Yes.

No one talks about the Montreal Expos. People in Montreal don't know about the Montreal Expos. The thing that you can tell though is that like it's happening in the same New York that 30 Rock happened to. Oh, absolutely. Yeah, 30 Rock happened to be just down the street. It's the camera just picked up and went over there in the same way that like, well no. Because Curb is more like in the real world that Seinfeld was filmed in.

Yes. But not in Seinfeld World. The Seinfeld Cinematic Universe. Yeah. There's the arc on like Curb season two or whatever where everyone's trying to get Larry to work on a news show. But he doesn't want to because he's done with Seinfeld and he hates television. Right.

Exactly. While he's meta. It's meta, man. What? But like the other bit too of course is that like this is a show that's unlike it's just like, oh, girl in the city or whatever. It's like, no, this has a really ridiculous premise. Yeah.

That like helps carry it. What the deal? Why is she in the next film? Okay, so well the main deal is like, yeah, it's girl in the city like sitcom type thing. But she was in a religious cult in a bunker for the last 15 years. I thought the world was over. From 98 to now. Because a crazy preacher man was like saying the world is over because we're all dumb.

It's all hellscape outside. And it's you and three other girls and me trapped in this bunker together. And then after 15 years they free them from the bunker. Like a SWAT team. And now it's like resume your life. And there's no Hellgate London outside. No. So when she goes up to people, or when she got in there, in high school or whatever.

So she's 30 when it opens up or whatever. It's not, I have to tell you about one gag. You're probably not there yet, but it was so strong. Just a visual gag. It was Kimmy and the blonde lady from 30 Rock. Who plays the same character. The exact same character. Yeah, girly.

The fucking secretary from Ally McBeal. Yes. Yes. No, no, that's Jane Krakowski. No, same girl. The girly showgirl. She's like, I got to stop thinking about the Reverend and the bunker. I need to take something off my mind.

She goes to spin class. And the guy that plays the spin instructor won't say who it is, but you're like, oh, that guy, that's great. But Kimmy is so good and unbreakable at spin class that she's working her way up. When you start the spin class, you're a lowly spinner at the back. Right. When she takes you, you work your way up to the front of the class and she leaps frogs over her boss and employees with the blonde lady.

And then she gets really jealous. She's like, Kimmy, you're not coming to spin class. And then she has a box of cereal and throws it all over, clean this up. She goes, look, did you just ask a front class spinner to do something for you? She goes, no, no, I'm so sorry. Don't tell him. Don't tell him. She goes, drink.

And she takes her ponytail and starts squeezing it out. And then the woman gets on her knees and she starts drinking her ponytail. She goes, I'm so sorry. Forgive me. It was fucking classic. That's pretty gross. And how clever is the opening theme? Yeah, yeah.

The opening theme is when the women get unlocked from the bunker. There just happened to be a black guy in the neighborhood. Standing nearby and going like, oh my god, these women are unbreakable. It was amazing, the story. And so it goes through a schmojo remix scene. What should we call it? Autotune the news. Autotune the news.

So they do their own version of all of that crazy shit. And it's their unbreakable theme. That's a fun idea. Autotuning the news. I haven't heard that for anything else. Exactly. And the black guy is perfect because he's exactly the type of guy. He's kind of not that great looking.

Antoine Dodson style. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, a really good show. He managed to make it through that explanation when I was saying Antoine Dodson. I was going to throw my phone at you. Because that's how it has to be. It has to be that. Well, yeah.

But nobody knows the name of the fucking other dudes, like the Burger Review Guy. We just know he's the Burger Review Guy. Yeah, Burger Review Guy. Dude, I love Burger Review Guy. We ate ribs with this dude, but we didn't have a clue. What's his name? Burger Review Guy? No, that's not the Burger Review Guy.

That's the guy with the kidnapped people. Before me and Willie went to PAX, we saw the Burger Review Guy review. The bacon wrapped deep dish, stuffed crust, little Caesar's thing with bacon. Pizza and bacon. That's all it was. And when we're in PAX, we're like, let's try it, I guess. Maybe. He can help out.

Maybe. We can do it. And we back down. One day. One day. Our Canadian hearts can't take it. Yeah, so whatever. Super ass channel, dedicated week.

That's all I got. Mine can. I have perfect blood pressure. You have low blood pressure. I have the best blood pressure. I find that incredibly hard to believe. So does my doctor. Yeah, I was about to say, your doctor probably like, can we do that again?

I went to the doctor. No, we did. I went to the doctor and took my blood pressure and 120 over 80. And the look I gave her, she went, okay, let's do the other arm. Nope. Same thing. I go, how? She said, I don't know.

Were you flexing? No. Okay. Because when anything remotely bad happens, you freak out. Well, I was in a relaxed, nice, like, like doctors. That helps. That helps. Maybe the screaming and whatnot is what keeps it down.

And if he didn't scream, then it would go up. Yeah. Back in the day, back when I was all internal voice and no outside voice, my blood pressure was probably a lot higher. Because it doesn't, you don't release it. It stays inside, right? Yeah. The picking back and off that.

Yeah. I watched, I finished Kimmy Schmidt and like, yeah, it was really great. I like these Netflix. We have the whole season up in one go. I also don't like when it's tries to really jam it down your throat with a concept that's like, you can't jam this. Marco Polo. Did you watch Marco Polo?

No. Watch Marco Polo. Netflix wants you to watch Marco Polo. Did you watch Marco Polo? I'm not. For me, the two that were... For a month, it was all... I didn't catch that.

It was spinning and he was Marco Polo. Right now, dude, I didn't have Netflix and I agree with you. It was somehow getting to me. Yeah. Wow. I didn't see any of that. I just got pushed cause of cards. And I'm like, yeah, I'll watch House of Cards.

Yeah, no, that's fine. But Marco Polo is not even that great of a show. I watched a couple of those. It was them trying to have a game of thrones. That'd be awesome. And I fucking looked through my list and I'm like, where did my Millennium Series movies go? I put them on my list and I was like, oh, Canadian Netflix.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just click the button. Gotta click the button. Oh, fixed. Yeah. I'm going on Netflix. I told you about something I watched called the ABCs of Death 2. And what it is is an anthology thing.

Yeah, I know, right? It's my title. It's so sad. It's a sequel. Yeah, cause it was the first one I saw. It was so bad. No, it's bad. But the first one was something I watched before we ever started the podcast.

Right. So it was... So it would be the D-E-Fs of Death? See, that's the name you would assume that Gashly Crum-Tinies was, but it's not. It's get 26 directors together. You say you have this letter of the alphabet. Oh, and they all have to do a short thing about it. They all have to make a short movie about the word that begins with a letter S.

Yeah. And it has to relate to death. Death has to play a part in the short movie. Dial M for murder. It's already made. Yeah, kind of. And you watch it and they don't tell you what the word is. So as you're watching it, it becomes this meta game going, uh, assassin, uh, uh, this,

uh, no, no. And then... Describe B. Describe B? Yeah. I don't remember. What? It was the example you gave me when you were talking about the movie.

Uh, as... The one for B was, uh, this asshole, like, a reporter guy is talking about, we have to save the badges. The badges are getting run out by this toxic waste dump and then, like, this guy is such an asshole to his video crew. He's like, I'm a nature videographer. Get out of my face, you fuckwad. Like, oh, a puppy cock.

And he's just being the worst asshole. And then he's standing near a badger hole and they hear the sound guys go, there's a badger in there. He's like, no, the badges are dead. This is why we're doing this. All you're the worst of it. You want to punch? You want to punch in the face?

And then he gets dragged into the hole and it's... Is Conan O'Brien the old boxer? And his torso comes flying out. Whoa. Yeah. And they'll say B for badger. And you're like, okay, yeah. You want to talk about the example you gave me is the guy that goes crazy.

Okay. Yeah. That one was really good. That wasn't B. That was... There's a slow motion of this big, huge fat guy running, like, at 24 frames per second, whatever the slowest thing for that is. It's actually a higher frame rate. Higher frame rate, right?

Yeah. So, like, like... 120. 120. And he's... And everyone's, like, on a cafe and they're going, oh, no. Oh, no. What's happening?

And he knocks people aside and there's no dialogue. And he goes over, he jumps onto a guy and starts biting his, like, throat out. And it's all going all over the place. And then a cop comes in with slow motion, fires a bullet. You see the bullet slowly enter the guy's head and he goes... And then it says, 50 minutes earlier, and you see the same guy. And he goes, yeah, I'll try some basalts. Oh.

And the best one is... So how's that not B? Yeah. It wasn't B. It was something like, like... Hey, forget what it was. Sure, sure. And this ABCs of Death 2 had probably the grossest scene ever. I've seen that it...

I'm not going to go into it, but it involved a birth of a child that was in utero for a few years. Okay. All right. Yeah. But it was still really clever. And when the word popped up, I went, oh, yeah. Holy shit.

And some of them are duds. Some of them have something that can only describe as those images of hellscapes from Don't Hug Me, I'm Scared. Yeah. There was an entire stop-motion animation that was just the worst parts. It was the most like underground European gross stop-motion animation where I'm like, I don't know what's going on. Is it good?

No. And then the word pops up and you're like, okay. So there's some duds, but it was... You get 26 directors. They're not all going to be gold. Yeah, they're not all going to be gold. That's the one where the gimmick concept. That's the one where the producer gets it back and he's like, thanks, man.

Yeah, exactly. How much time do we have? Fuck. You spent how much time making... Oh. Yeah. Animated. Exactly.

You started this first. Japanese director submitted one where people are being put on trial for killing zombies during the zombie apocalypse. This is such a good concept. Because they found a cure for the zombies. So the zombies are cognitive, but they're still kind of falling apart a little bit. And they still have high-ranking parts of government and judges. And they're putting all these regular people to death.

And look, I was just defending myself. I was like, you viciously killed 14 people. And he's like, but I had to save my daughter and she got bit too. And then the trial doors open up and this little girl like Kikiko just comes in and goes, you killed me, mom. And she's like a zombie too. And she's like, oh no. That's fucked.

It was really good. Like there was some that like, yeah, it was like touch and go here and now. I don't know. I say you have the free pass right up until... No, you get a free pass on any non-cured zombie. It's not a discussion, dude. Self-defense is self-defense. Yeah.

Legally. But zombies were taking it as an offense to them. Right. Right. What else? I'm not going to say this lightly, but Ori and the Blind Forest, game of the year contender. It's really good. So we've all played that.

Why are you going to pass me your Xbox account? I keep forgetting. I'm sorry. Did we all play that? Or just me and Matt? Just you two. Okay. So why do you think it's the game of the year contender?

Because like, A, gorgeous. I, not only will I agree with you, I don't think you said enough there. It's not gorgeous. It's the most beautiful 2D thing that's ever existed. Like, I always kind of thought Rayman Legends would be those words. In a world where customers' revenge exists. I can't buy that. I don't know, Frank.

Well, that's thematic beauty. Gordy, within the first five minutes, almost cried. Yeah. It's got an up-style intro. Gorgeous, emotional. Also, I had a triple jump before I got the actual triple jump. Yeah, that's handy. Yes.

An ability called Bash, which A- Is it a literal triple jump or like in Strider? Strider is in a dash. No, but there's an actual triple jump that you unlock. One, two, three, okay. Right. But the ability you get called Bash, which is after you get the second double jump, right? There's an ability called Bash where if a projectile comes at you, you hold Y and you bounce yourself off any enemy projectile or an enemy.

And you tip it off too? And you, as soon as you hold the button, you can move the control stick to launch yourself in whatever direction, 360, like a clock. You just go, okay, one over there. You point which direction you are. And did you go to a section where you're in a tree? I did not go very far. Okay. You hold the button and you go in whichever direction you want.

So Strider. A little bit. But it's only when you bounce off enemy projectiles. Right. I never got the thing you're talking about in Strider. There was a section where I'm in a tree that's filling up with water and I have to go vertically up. And it was like one of the most well-designed, like, I'm not fucking this up. I'm not confused with the prompts.

I know exactly where you want me to go, but I'm always this close to dying because the thing is rising. Okay. Like, it was like, I'm like, this is the... I hear it's a hard game. It's not easy because when the power is over and I was showing like you create your own save points, but there is a cool down on creating your own save points. And it requires an energy meter that you can also use for abilities. So if you want to use your abilities to do like a power attack, you can't use that pip to make a save point.

And as you're going on, you have to remember to keep saving because if you don't forget about it, you don't forget about it. Like you just lost. I blew like half an hour of progress because I forgot to make savings. Because if you start doing well and there's like a new enemy that you don't know, you're going to take him by surprise. It's not easy, but it's like this perfect challenge where I'm just like not frustrated. And then I learn like the patterns like so... And I know that it's like Max Beattie.

He was like, yeah, the game of the year for me so far. Yeah, I saw you do it. He's like, it's eight hours, which to me is like a perfect length for this type of thing. It's not staying. It's not overstaying. It's welcome. You get enough abilities and you can go back and get the ones you missed, get every single like, you know, heart container, energy tank, what have you.

The only thing about it, I'm not sure if you saw us in the PC version, but when you move closer to the edges of the screen, there's this blur. Motion blur. That's very distracting. Oh, you can turn it off on PC. You can? Yeah, I left it on. I prefer it off.

There's something about it where I'm like, it's fucking with my eyes a little bit. I don't know. Okay. I agree with everything you said. I don't like it. Wow. I... Despite all those things.

You're completely right. I don't like the way you jump. It's like the... It's like... Sonic 4 problem? No. No. That's not fair.

It's... It's... You're saying it's still a good jump. You just don't like it. The way... Because wall jumping is a big thing in that game. Just the way you happen to jump on walls. Is it a Luigi jump?

No. No. It's like... It's looser. It's a very loose kind of jumping physics. Well, where is it? From the... From Sackboy to Simon.

That's what I'm trying. Yeah, I'm trying to... Like, give me something. It's not Sackboy. It's closer to Sackboy than Simon, and I want it closer to Simon. I want the wall jumping to feel like Mega Man X, and it feels like a slightly stiffer meat boy. And it's just...

Like, I'm going to put more time into it, because it's clearly amazing. You need to unlock a couple more things. It's just jumping around and climbing on walls. It's just... It's something off about it, and I can't... That's right. And I'm mad... That it might be you?

That I'm not having... Like, I'm looking at this, and every part of the game is astounding. But why am I bored? Well, fuck, a core mechanic thing. I'm bored. Like, I'm actually straight up bored. And I'm like, no! This game is a...

Why? Bullshit! It's like if somebody brought... If somebody brought like a... This is deeper than the game. They brought like the fanciest steak in the world to you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And you take a bite in, and you're like, I just kind of want to hit Wendy's hamburger

right now. Maybe you're just not the main mood for steak right now. I don't know. I don't know what to say to that. Maybe you need a game of core numbers before. I can't say that you're wrong, but... It's like the... No, this game has...

It's a huge upgrade mechanic. Yeah. It's like trees. I don't... I'd like... Dude, I don't know. That's weird, that's weird. It feels a lot like Rayman, and I also couldn't figure out why I didn't enjoy Rayman more.

I enjoy Rayman as much as I'm enjoying them. Oh, wait. What? You didn't like Rayman? I like... Which one? Currently, I like Rayman Legends and Origins. Both more than this.

But they had the same problem. It's like there's something about the movement or something. Okay. I guess I just want... I guess I just want like stiffer... Because when you say to Meat Boy, that just makes me think N+, kind of feel a little bit... Yeah, I know, I know. And I goddamn love that.

It feels like N+. Oh, that's the best! Maybe not as tight, but... That's the best! That's such a good deal. But it's not Meat Boy, I get what you're saying. I fucking love those jumps, more than anything. And I don't like N+.

It's like dumb how floaty it is. You would have killed you if you jumped into the pool. No, it's cool, and that's why it is, but it's so... Because that missile's gonna blow your shit. I hate N+, like to death, I fucking hate everything about that game. Okay, so yeah. But, if you like it, Ori has not quite as much, but a similar amount of air control. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, give it to me, give it to me, I like that.

Yeah, no, I just came away from that feeling bummed out at myself. Dude, Legend of Kage, man. Yeah, I don't know what that is. That's the next game where you jump above the treetops. Sure. You jump, you're off the screen. You spend like six or seven seconds just floating through the air jumping. Fucking mighty bomb jack.

Jump as high as you want. Amazing, amazing. Yeah, like, oh man, that game deserves all the awards. I just wish I could care. There's games like that where I'm like, I know this is a good game, I'm just not... Yeah, maybe it's literally its proximity to Type Zero, Bloodborne, and Pillars of Eternity. I can't get too excited. Because all I can think about is those games.

Like, maybe it's that. And really quickly... No, wait, no, because there's a different game, and it's Hotline Miami too. Hotline Miami too. But I did not have this reaction with. Hotline Miami too. It's great. I prefer the first one.

Did you finish it? I put in a few, I got a few more levels in, but... How many levels are in this? It's twenty-thirty-ish. Twenty-two, I want to say. Okay, then I got a third one away through the game. Well, I'll wait through the game. Yes, twenty-two, I think.

I can't remember specifically. Anyway, I just, something Pat said, I don't think the level design is quite as good. There's something... They're too big. About it where it's... They're just too large. It's not unfair, it's just... I remember the first one being really tighter floors.

Tighter floors with more corridors and walls. Less glass. So you could see... The second one has more open areas in general. Yeah, like the jungle area. There's multiple buildings. That was a metal gear level. I think it's a perfect sequel.

Because if you just go right off the first one, it's such a natural progression. It feels like it's bigger than the first one ever was. It totally is. It absolutely is. I think it's a perfect progression. That being said, a good thirty percent of the appeal of Hall of Miami is the music and it fucking blows the first one out of the water. The first game had probably one of the greatest soundtracks of everything.

And this one makes that look like a joke. Looks like it looks like it makes it look like it brings a spirit out of you. It's nuts. Every single track was solid. It's like the kind of... If we were doing a Game of the Year stuff, it would be like most improved. That's usually reserved for bad games that have good sequels. But for the soundtrack, this game's soundtrack was fucking terrible.

And it's pretty good this year. But this one would get most improved, even though it won the best soundtrack in the game. It just came down to the target this time. So we were playing it recently, right? You know the swan mask that we didn't pick? Yeah. So Ash and Alex, when you take them, you control one guy... Swan mask is the coolest thing in the game.

You control one guy who has a chainsaw, and you have a second guy who follows you around with a handgun that you aim manually with a right stick. So you know when you peek around a corner to get people to notice you? Yeah. When you get behind the corner with Ash, Alex is then peeking because he's slightly on a delay. And the guy notices you, and then you fire and blow him away. Wow. So his actions are like a fraction of a second.

No, he's not delayed. He follows your path behind you. He's not slow. But if you want to get him around the corner, you've got to do it first and then wait for his turn. Yeah. He moves instantly, but he's just behind you all the time. Yeah. And they're so cool, but they're so hard to play with.

I'm with Matt. I don't like the level design as much, but everything else is fucking awesome. The way wider variation of character types is hugely appreciated. The level design on your first playthrough is without a doubt not as fun feeling, but I think it's just as good. And if you disagree with me, I'm sure you love your C-Ranks. Did you figure out the... It's just as good. It's just way harder.

To put this in context, he was a beast at the game. Yeah, he told me that he's amazing at it. Did you get your Melee? It wasn't that good in the video. Did you figure out the Melee guy? Yeah, totally. Okay. You can just press circle to cancel.

Yeah, the writer's one of the coolest characters in the game. Oh, the lock-in thing was not a lock-in thing. No, you lock on and you... two punches, and you're still locked on for longer than most other characters, but then you can hit circle to back. The writer's a character that plays entirely non-lethally, so if you swing a bat into their head exploding, they'll grab their nuts and start... Yeah, you can't use guns and shit, you just disassemble them. But if you push them down on the ground and punch their head in a mulch with like a hundred punches, then he takes his jacket off and turns into the other characters. Talking about the multiple characters, like, in the story-wise, I don't like jumping around between all the gameplay-wise, it's cool, all the character variety. It's a little hard to follow.

It's hard to follow. The first one is hard to follow, but I prefer the first one of jacket and staying with them the entire time, depending on your actions. You find out the jacket. Switching over to biker. Yeah. And in this, I'm like, there's so many characters, and like, maybe I need to actually beat it to get it as a real... Four gangs of characters. Are we filming a movie now? What's that girl up to?

There's the fans, there's the writer, there's the son, and there's... The four soldiers. Yeah, the soldiers. I get for a sequel, you need to add... And there's the snake guy, too. I get for a sequel, you need to add some sort of complexity to the story just to make it different, but I'm like, I don't prefer it. Yeah. Tony's the best!

Tony's the best! The punches? Yeah! The son gets that ability as well, when he gets the brass knuckles, like... Some of those characters, like the son and the snake guy... Who's the son? He's the son of the gang leader from the first game. Oh!

Yeah. Anyway. Spoilers. For the plot, like... I already saw the ending in the game, because I went into cranky streams. Was the ending like, wait, what? He was like, oh, what's this? Is this what it means? And everyone's like, yeah. Everyone's like, no, that's not what he means. He's like, well, I prefer what I think, right?

I don't really know what it means. Is that guy the devil? Is it the devil? Yes. It's the devil, isn't it? Fair enough. Okay. Cranky Stream went pretty well. Like, he didn't know that he was beating the game. He didn't know he was that far from what had happened. He was like, oh, shit! And I was like, oh, shit, well, I'm looking at it. There's nothing I can do about it.

Did you see that, like, fake stinger after the credits? Yeah, that was a great stinger. So good. But it's a fake stinger. I love it. Yeah. Until it's a real stinger. It might become a real stinger. It could, but they already said they don't want it.

That's the best part about it. And the last thing, my dad's birthday was the other day, and my fiance made some amazing cookies. Liam, would you like to try one of these cookies? Of course I would. Of course I would. They're super gooey. What the fuck? They're just for me.

The batter is made in low sugar. Do you want a bite or no? Yeah, I would for sure. Okay, I was super confused there for a second. You did it in a very procedural manner. I'll take the fall apart. He's been working on this all day. These are good. These are great cookies, man.

There was, like, a surplus of them, and I ate too many. I don't think you can handle this too much, William. These are top-sell. Can I do them? Yeah, I'll make them. You seem pretty sugary. I just went to a restaurant that, like, specializes in, like, sugar shit. So, like, I can handle it right now.

Really? The batter is lower sugar, just that there's a bunch of chocolate cube butter in it. Yeah, there's totally cube butter in it. Do you go to a sugar shack, like, every year? No. I used to. No. I was talking about the sugar shack, actually, because...

Do Americans know about sugar shits? They don't. The Cabana Circular thing is what Ontarians and other people from outside Quebec would come to Quebec to do. Yeah. Do they don't even have that? They don't have it at all? No.

They might have some equivalent? Maybe some things, but not the exact same. What it is for Americans is you go up north in Quebec and there's these, like, farmland places, and what they do is they open up a thing where you take a horse ride around, get a very old, rural feel. Activities. And the main deal is you take snow, you put it on a stick with maple syrup, and that is the truth.

Make it happy. Well... And that is the treatment itself. And then they have, like, a lot of maple-based... Let's see, I was just asking about that. Meal, meals, and stuff. Right? Like, they do have, like, a big sit-down meal, kind of a buffet-style.

Yeah, like, in, like, a Game of Thrones-style, long, wooden haul. Yeah, exactly. And you get, like, more traditional Quebec food, like pea soup, and everything is coated in maple. And then you realize the horse shit. Because here's Young Woolly going on a trip, right? One, it's every grade at the same time. That sucked for me, too.

In a fucking giant, loud ass, like, it was an assembly except we had food in front of us. Right. So it's the worst thing ever, right? Okay. Second. They start in the new year at Hogwarts. Second.

Okay, once again, Young Woolly, right? Here's a plate of ham. Oh, you don't eat that. Religious shit. Here's a plate of eggs. Oh! You don't eat eggs. You don't like eggs?

Because you're a weird monster. Here's nothing. And then go outside and have the syrup snow, and then you'll be fine. And that's the whole point. And then get on this stinky ass horse, because they didn't wash it. They rode it hard and put it up wet. And now it smells like ass. Or it's just got a poop.

Yeah! But you gotta wash your fucking horse, man. Woolly, it sounds like this is entirely your fault. Back in Grenada, when we rode the horses, you fuck, you wash them. That horse wasn't washed. You can clean them. They smell good. It's chemical.

So the whole trip was bullshit and annoying and sucked, and it's terrible. Why don't you go to one now? I should go to one now to fix it. You should do it. Every time I do so, I'm like, yeah, cows are nice. Cows are nice. They are nice. They look nice.

No, they feel nice. They're like big, giant, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb animals. No, they're big, giant couches. Because I saw at the metro near my place, they started putting out all the maple products. I bought a can of maple syrup, and I started drinking it, and I was like, man, I can't wait for the fucking Kavana sick this year. You go, you go, you go regularly. I love it.

Of course. He's a hundred boys. Of course you do. He owns the entire empire. He owns the entire empire. It was always terrible. He has to go out and hunt the trees. That's a real shame.

I like going as part of my school, because depending on the time of day, they'll give you like, here's just bacon, here's flapjacks, here's all the maple shit. I'll just like free food. They're nice. I heard that the super pricey place in Montreal here, Au Pied-Cochon, has their own version of Kavana sick. I never knew. I heard about that.

It's kind of expensive. Gourmet. But it's like gourmet Kavana sick. Shack food. Yeah. It's the weirdest thing. That's kind of new. For, maybe, I don't know if you'd be partake, but the misses went to a place that just has

bacon. Everything is bacon. Oh, is it Brutus? Yes, it's Brutus. I don't like that place. Brutus went up. I'm super down. The music is 50 decibels higher than it should be.

Okay. They had craft dinner balls. Oh, yeah, I ate it all. It was great. Okay, it was great. That's not the issue. The salad was a bowl of weaved bacon with, like, Caesar. Oh, they just started serving their poutines in weaved bacon bowls, too.

Yeah. I don't think that's food. It's actually good. The food's really good. But I went there with my girlfriend and we were, like, literally leaning across a small table and then raising our voice. Okay, fuck that. That's the worst.

That's the worst. Way too loud. Brutus is a great neighbor. Yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah, definitely. Did you hear my mac and cheese alert from the place that's on Green Street? I haven't been downtown. I haven't been yet, but I still have it in mind, for sure, yeah.

In case people want to, do you have mac and cheese alerts for any rural mac and cheese recipes you have on his Twitter? I'd be interested. I'd be interested in trying them, totally. So, oh wait, Pat. Yeah. Did you cover your thing? I did, Ori.

I did Hotline Miami and I watched Brooklyn Nine-Nine. What else did I do? I forgot to talk about something last week. At your suggestion, Willie, I went and tracked down and watched The Reboot Movies. Ah, yes. You never saw them, I take you. I had never seen them. Dude, tell!

Because you're one of those dudes that thought it ended at the musical in season three and just racked up. Yeah, because despite the fact that they introduced the concept of Damon Way before that. Yeah, sure. I thought it was a weird loose end. Maybe Farah YTV did a really disjointed bad job at advertising those and saying what they were and playing them is weird. Well, they didn't, but after the movies came out they did because they had a shitty plan

where they released them as movies, which they advertised the shit out of Watch My Two Bobs, Watch Damon Rising coming up this day. I remember the fucking commercial for My Two Bobs. Heavy, heavy, heavy promotion, but once it aired, they cut it up into half an hour chunks to be a season four and that was where it got confused. It's goofy that you mentioned this. It's like you're one of those people that thought it ended at three, even though they talked about Damon.

It's like, you know what, you're right. I thought that YTV and Mainframe Entertainment had just left the series on a weird cliff hanger with a giant loose end hanging out. So, I guess I'm stupid. So I watched Damon Rising and everything about Damon Rising is amazing. The voices are a little weird. Yeah, they've still got a modulation on it. Yeah, there's a little bit of a miss.

But the idea of Damon, of your primary villain being a charismatic, nice person, that is the word. She is the word. That's the best. My Two Bobs, also pretty great, not as good as Damon Rising, and woolly, when I tried to talk to you about this off the podcast, you started to have like a nervous breakdown and like shaking your head and like doing compulsive things and saying, stop, I need this.

Don't do this to me. And I told you I would bring it up on the podcast and then I forgot. Woolly, you said the reboot ended and it had a bad ending as if the bad guy won. Not bad as a negative, bad as in the bad guy wins. That is some fucking absurd self-deception. You are lying to yourself and you are lying to anyone with an ear shot when you say that. That is the most not an ending ever. The bad guy gets to the thing and says the hunt begins and then cut to black, get ready

for season five. That's not an ending. That is not an ending and you know it's not because when you are going, stop saying this bad, stop, I need this, you can't do this to me, you are completely full of shit. That is a Twin Peaks, this would be your, this is Twin Peaks' ending, exactly. It's actually the same ending. You know what the thumbnail for Twin Peaks is on Netflix? The very last thing that Cooper does in the very last season.

And when he is looking in the mirror, it's the worst. Okay, you know what? Maybe, alright? Maybe I did, but the thing is, I'm glad we are getting the new one with the kids who get the powers. But wait, wait, there has been an update that lets me make it, I can survive, I can keep it going. There was a reboot official comic book that was put out that actually picks up from the

moment Rachel Bobb's ends, yes, and it is way, yes it does, and it's way less shit than you'd expect it to be. Have you ever considered like hiring an animator and the voice actors and stitching that all together into a fake season 5 motion comic? Dude, dude, if I had money, like for reals, that's not even impossible. I know exactly, that's why I'm actually suggesting it. It's kind of like how Buffy the Vampire Slayer continued, the show continued in comic book form.

They're literally called Buffy's season 8, season 9, season 9. So I feel like I know Woolly a lot better now, because like his obsession with reboot is clear, but like I didn't know that it had been left on this absurd shit hanger. Yeah. And like now it makes, and also his reboot poster, which where is it? That thing, I always looked at that and was blown away at like why is it drawn so badly? Why does Megabyte look like shit? He looks nothing like, oh no wait, that's what he looks like in the thing.

So season 3 ends and everything is alphanumeric, and I'm sitting there going, bullshit, don't end on this fucking musical, you just told me that the Guardians are being fucking taken over by Damon. Don't pull this shit on me, I'm not a dumb kid, fuck you. This isn't pixelatious. And radio silence, and then finally the movies in are announced and that happens, and I'm like good, good, good, we get the wrap up. And then Damonizing ends with a cliffhanger.

And then it's like yeah, but there's another movie, and then My Two Bobs ends with a bigger cliffhanger. And then silence, and I'm left in the darkness of my thoughts. And this is what 1999 or 2000 was like. We'll have to ask you, I'm sure you hacked into Mainframe's databases and looked at their financials to find out why. I had those guys on ICQ. Did they just run out of money, like what was the deal, was there bad ratings, why did

it all fall apart? It didn't fall apart. Why did it fall apart though? It didn't fall apart. It clearly did. But they didn't have the money to do anything after the YTV ABC contract right out. And ABC ditched on them like a while ago, and ABC had funded a big part of it initially. At the end, it was just YTV in their own pocket.

And once that... That's not deep, because you have to fund Phil's rotating harem of porn stars. Sure. Gavin needs, daddy needs his candy, right? But either way, the point is that they needed to do other shit to make money, and then they became Mattel's bitch by picking up Barbie shit. They did that Spider-Man thing, and then a couple of stuff, but licensed was the only way to make money.

So the money just wasn't there for you? Exactly. That's all. In this case... If you had been a better fan, you could have... Yeah, it was all my... You could have learned... I know.

You could have learned financial and business stuff and gone down there and helped them. That's exactly it. My dream was to work at Mainframe as a kid, and I was just too shitty of a fan. It died on my arms. That's just why everyone in this room failed Mega Man Legends 3. Yeah, yeah. You know what? My dream was ten years ago.

If I ever run into that fucking guy from Capcom Europe that was running that fucking Twitter stream, I'm gonna punch him in the face. And that Twitter stream deserves a peaceful something. But the thing is, just to wrap that up, is... Yes. Okay, after the cliffhanger goes for a while, I'm like, no, it was just a bad ending. It was a bad ending where the bad guy won, and then that's cool, and I'll brave of them to make that decision.

And brave of them. And brave of them. Those heroes. What a bad choice. Okay? Wow. And that's how it ended, right? That's like straight up, you have a problem.

And now, I know that there's the comic book called Paradigms Lost, in which you read about exactly what happens when Megabyte does begin the hunt. Who does it follow, the comic? Yeah. There's a lot of characters. It hops around. No, but I mean, does it just hops around? Okay.

It hops around through the main cast, and it brings back someone really cool. Gavin? No. Captain Capacitor is cool, but no. No, he's always around. Fong. No, the dude from... I'm just naming characters.

Remember the Codemaster Talon episode? Turbo? No, Turbo's a current. The Codemaster that comes in to find Old Man Pearson? Yeah, yeah, yeah. He looks like a bug, and he begins a paradise shift, and he holds up the staff, and they go into a game with him, and he jumps up the logs, out to the back of the train. Remember that guy?

No, I fucking do that, dude. Yeah. He's the coolest. And then he ends up basically... That was like Blade showing up in Spider-Man. And then Bob shows honor, and he goes, okay, you're a pretty solid guy, I'm out of here. That guy comes back and plays a major role. So Paradigm's Lost is the name of the wrap-up comic.

And... Like, is it wrap-up? If this didn't happen, this conversation would have been way different, but I can now laugh and smile and happily say, no, there is a good wrap-up. And so, like, two weeks ago, when I mentioned this to you, and you started freaking out, like, is that when you decided to redouble the hunt for new info and found it? So that you could avoid, like, spreading up on air right down? Yes.

When did the comic come out? You can't show... Like, that wasn't on air. We had that conversation off air, but there are things that I need in my life to keep going as they are, and if you come and upset these foundations, then we have a problem. It all comes tumbling down. But a new foundation was found, and we can move on. Okay, well, when did it come out?

The Paradigm's Lost came out, it was not long ago, actually. I'm glad that my explicit threats to damage your worldview helped you. In the end, it was for the best. It might have been 2008 or so. Wait, air is bad for you! That's way more recent than I would have thought. Way more recent. It came back with the wave of the reboot revival quote-unquote stuff that led to nothing.

But now, you're getting a new one. But now, we're getting a real new one. Your new Kodion Coat. Guardian Coat. I'm sure you love that. You know what? Can't wait for the Guardian Coat, you guys. You know what gets me through any of those dark years of reboot is that you go into Deviant

Art, and you type in Andrea, and as long as new fan art is being made of adult Andrea, I'm good. Sure. That's all I need to coast me through. Now, that's never gonna stop. Fair warning, the art in this comic is kind of shit. Is it your poster? It's better than the poster, but this was done by the guy who did the textures for Damian.

And you know what, dude? I read, like, half of the Silent Hill comics, so I'll be fine. Good. You can deal. But just read it for what the story is. I don't remember a single fucking thing about any of them. They're terrible. They are the worst.

All the comics are also shit. Can you at least see what's happening on the fucking page? So this week... Well, look, the American ones, those bad Chinese Manhua versions, remember we used them for the RE2 play? I sure do. That's sick. King of Fighters Forever, man.

Liam, how was your week? It was good. It was good. I played a lot of Code Name Steam, which I only just got today. But what time is it? It's, like, what, six o'clock? I've played, like, eight hours of it. It's super good.

Wait, how were you even awake before then? I was... You were excited. I just happened to be awake. Oh, I don't understand. Dude, it's six o'clock. Eight hours ago was ten in the morning. Yeah, that's right.

Yeah. Why do you think we meet up for recordings of three? I'm glad that you like it, because I was like, if anyone should like this, it's Liam, so... I can't wait. Yeah, it's super good. Unless I get a moment. I'm definitely gonna grab it, but yeah. I hope you do.

No, you should play the other one. I'll pass it on to Street Pass. The other one? Yeah! I'm gonna play the other one, too. So... It'll... People will find out later this week.

There's a different game that Willie started to play, and him getting into it had me almost as excited to the point where I was sending him tips and walks monster and guy, yeah, sure. It's been a long time since a game has gripped me by the fucking collar and yanked me in on minute one. Question, question. Was this something I was there for? No, no. And we don't want...

People just... He's too hard. No, but I'm curious, and I don't know. We'll talk about it after. Is there a video coming up? We'll talk about it maybe. Yes, maybe. Okay, okay.

Don't worry about it. Don't worry about it. Maybe it's an incredibly long video. But sure, I just didn't get why you weren't saying anything at all. Because we don't want to spoil the surprises. I was confused. Yeah, I was confused as all. That's all.

Liam, how's it going? I was playing that. That game's really good. I started playing Tokyo Twilight Ghost Hunter, which came out. Yeah, what is it? Is that a visual novel? Is that like a ace attorney? It's a visual novel that is, like, absurdly polished.

I've never seen a visual novel this polished. What determines the polishness of a visual novel? It's got all these slick little, like, animation scenes that play. Okay. You know how a visual novel is usually, you have a static shot at a background, and there's up to two characters on the screen, traditionally. This game will do it where you have the area, and you have the character in the middle of the screen.

And then when you're talking to the next guy, it'll rotate the environment. It'll go to the next environment. And the camera will just pan, and the next guy's standing there. And it'll pan. But it's really impressive. Visual novels don't have to pan. No, they don't. And it's got all these little in-between, like, animation bits for, like...

What's Pooper Buttering's there? None so far. Well, that sucks. And then when you get into the battles, the battles are all, like, tactical RPG stuff. Wait, what? Yeah. Is this even a visual novel, then? If it's got tactical RPG combat?

It's both. That's wrong. It's like 999... Does it? It's multi-blood fighting game or a visual novel? I mean, it's fighting... I don't know. But it's, like, what?

It plays blue as well, right? Yeah. I feel like... It's somewhere in between. I feel like genres are in this weird thing where, like, certain genres just always get beaten on their classification. Mm-hmm. Like, Rune Escape is below visual novel on game genre lists.

Yeah. So 999 is a visual novel with Rune Escape elements. Yeah. But if it's a visual novel with tactical RPG battles, I feel that... It's a tactical RPG. I feel like it's a tactical RPG with visual novel elements. Am I crazy? No, you're not.

Okay, I see. Unless there's only, like, one every three hours. There's a ranking. There's a hierarchy. And, like, whichever one gets top billing is the real genre. Yeah. So the game is split into 13 episodes with an opening credits and a closing credits on each one, and it's, like, really well presented in that regard.

And you go to your base in every mission, and from your base you can customize your characters. You can play this board game that's insanely robust that's just there. There's just tons of stuff to... We're talking, like, Blitzball level robust? I looked at it, and I was like, ooh! And I didn't even play it yet. So yes. I'm very generous by calling Blitzball robust.

I love Blitzball. I think it's more robust than it's at all. I adore Blitzball. Blitzball is better than FF10. The only Blitzball I want to hear about is Wolfgang Krausers. Yeah. Sure. And you can use the laptop in the universe to browse the, like, shitty internet.

Really? Yeah. There's only, like, three web pages, so, like, you get the joke. That's my favorite feature that never needs to happen. It's there for just a little bit. The old in-game internet. Fake internet! It functions as your ability to...

Fake internet and GTA games are amazing. It functions as, like, how you get your side quests and stuff. You go on the internet and you accept requests from people and stuff. And then, like, when you do the requests, you have a setup period where you have, like, a blueprint of the building, and you set traps for the ghosts in the building. Okay. And the traps all cost money because you got to buy them. Right.

That's taken away from your commission at the end. What kind of traps? Like, putting salt down and ghosts can't cross over the salt. Oh, okay. Or, like... Or, like, you put up, like, a doll and ghosts will go towards it. And, like, everything... Oh, man, that's great!

Really well-written descriptions and stuff. Dolls are just magnetically attracted to dolls. A little bit. There's a huge amount of stuff. And the characters can't see the ghosts, right? So you're tracking them on the Ouija tablet. From another character's perspective. And, like, you're just kind of tracking them and every character has a sensor, like in, like,

Ghostbusters or, you know. And so this guy can see where the ghosts are if they're close enough to the people. And so you move the people and you make them swing, right? You don't attack. You make them swing. And then the ghosts and the players do their turns at the same time. And if it lines up and your swing hits them, then you hit them. Oh!

Okay! And if you swing and the ghost isn't there and there was a chair or a lamp, then you'll probably hit the lamp and you'll have to pay for that when the mission's over. So this is the equivalent of a guy in the baseball bat going, Fuck you, ghosts! Yeah, yeah. And just swinging the bat around it, nothing. You walk into the building.

You've got the sensor and the baseball bat and the guy says, Okay, swing now. And you just swing, right? Will you, Ghost? Will you spook investigations? Yeah. You can start that shit. Let's go with that.

This sounds really, really interesting. What's this on? Vida PS3. Okay. And one of the things that surprised me so much is you have this shitty, super minimal top-down 2D thing for the tactical RPG bit. But then when the turn starts and you do a swing, it goes down to a full 3D environment of the room, which was super unnecessary.

But they went the extra mile and they did it. What's this called? Tokyo Ghost Hunters? Tokyo Twilight Ghost Hunters. Twilight Ghost Hunters. I saw that name and I'm like, you know, throw ghosts in there. I was like, is this the coolest thing? It's not scary though.

It's not scary, no, no. Is it like goofy, like Ghostbusters? Uh, a little bit, but it's like Japanese. The Ghostbusters cinematic universe. Boy, that would be a good thing to have. What are you laughing at? That's a thing. Everything sees you.

A producer just said, that's what we're doing. Yeah, that's right. To see you. Since they was talking, a game came in the mail today. Oh, yeah, this is like a game. Fuck. We're not telling you what this game is. No, we're not.

This is a good ass game. But Liam always asks about this series. When are we going to do these games? I want to do the 64 one as well. Okay, this is terrible podcast material. No, it's great. We can't just go there. Here's the thing.

It's a mystery. This is garbage. It is. Don't do that on the podcast. I have to tell him not to tell people to stop watching and you're going to tell him to not do non-podcast things on the podcast. We did a video earlier today when you're like, here Matt, here's footage of a game that we talked about on the podcast and they looked at it and then we continued with the podcast.

But I said the name of it and people know what it was. You didn't even remember what the video was. That's a mystery. We can't say what this is and now we're wasting like three minutes on it. Oh no, that was three minutes. Shut up. Or 15 seconds. Axis for localizing this.

Because I think this is the first game that's ever been localized by like the producer and writer guys who made Twilight Syndrome back on the PS1, but that never came out. The developers did Deadly Premonition as well. I don't know how deeply they were involved, but I just know they worked on it. You can't produce. Shoutouts to them localizing it, anti-shoutouts for once again releasing it with the day one discount without announcing it. So everybody bought that physical copy.

You need to learn your lesson and stop. Oh yeah. I'm gonna. Like the one time? Yeah. It was last week. You talked about it. It was two or three weeks ago.

And you made a joke about it. Okay, it was two weeks ago about Under Night and then last week you made the joke about this with a different game. And then it totally happened. Because I expect smaller groups like this to not do like anti-consumer stuff. How is a sale anti-consumer? Because I paid $50 for the retail copy and it's $28 on PSN. They didn't announce it and I already paid for it.

Then get your money back and then digital version. But it's garbage. I bought it and I opened it before the sale went on. Oh well then you got it early. But it's like announce the fucking sale a day early and it's the best ever. Don't announce the sale and you're just like early customers are just getting fucked. That's always the case. We're both of these pre-orders?

But not on day one it's not. What are these both pre-orders? What? Digital you couldn't pre-order it. It just went up at $28. It's well worth $28. No but what you bought? Yeah.

Okay. It was a pre-order. And Under Night you pre-ordered as well? Yeah. And I opened them before the digital version went up. So there's two people to blame here. One is Grace Chen again. No.

Access should just announce it on the fucking Twitter. And second is whoever is in charge of announcing these or not. The first is Axis. What was that? Takamura marketing. Grace Chen is not a fault at all. Well no. Grace Chen is not a fault at all.

Axis should just say we're putting this on sale. I'll bet you their sales would increase if they said it was going to go on sale. So like that aside by this game it's really a good game. There's a game we totally forgot to talk about that we all played this week as of yesterday. And you mentioned Otaris Chemicals earlier. As of yesterday? Yeah. Like me and him.

Otaris Chemicals. Revolations. Revolations. Two. Episode three. Episode three. Continues to be great. Fucking awesome.

So good. It's so long isn't it? It's so long. It's like two and a half hours. It was three and a half hours. We finished it in like three hours. I got two and a half hours but like it's fucking long. Has the audience seen this footage yet?

No. Okay. They know where it's at. They know where it's at. Yeah. Yes. It's a bit unusual as far as but like we've been commenting on the thing from the future. The schedule because of Mecha Week the schedule gets elongated slightly.

So episode three will probably be up in two weeks or whatever. Just the general like announcement continues to be great. It's great. It's fucking great. We have not had an episode like that was. At this point for $25 even if the fourth episode is fucking terrible it's still worth it. I think everyone who owns a PS4 or an Xbox One or PC. PC it depends if you want to play local because it still doesn't have that fucking local life.

But like anyone who can. No. Somebody modded it in. I recommend you plunk down $6 and just get the first episode and the raid mode suite that comes with it because like that's like a ton of content. I still haven't even touched the raid mode stuff. So much too. And I saw that the I should do that because I can't play the fourth episode without him

and I can't play raid mode. It'll make you better. Well I'm confused because I saw an announcement saying they just. Are you serious? You can be honked? Yeah. Advertised all over. They announced online co-op for it.

I'm punching right there. But like how did it not launch with that? It launched with it. Just the PC version. The PC version doesn't have local co-op. The PC version on the Steam page says that it has local co-op. Yeah because they copied their generic text and then it came out and did not have local co-op. And then they said we're looking into it and then somebody modded local co-op in within a day.

And then they're like we're looking into it and they released a patch that broke performance on PC. And that was as of last week. They are fixing it. Supposedly. As much as they're meandering a bit like they are. I fucking hope so. It should be really easy. I had the same thing with Helldivers because they copied the generic text on the Vita.

Guess what? That game doesn't have local co-op. Straight up fucking co-op. What I didn't know is that no version but Hall and Anne has a level editor. That makes sense. I'm smiling because I remember when that was my job to look at the text that's going to be used on the different versions. Well why were you smiling?

And it's like this tedious shit that's like of course who cares. But it's so easy to just go and grab the data from one SKU, copy paste it to the other one. But you're being paid to not do that. It's like local co-op is like a bullet point on the PC release. You go to the thing and you make sure the SKU has its own exact list. Do it the easy way. It's so easy. Do it the easy way.

It's so easy. Why would you bother the hard way? It's like 200 words. Just have one guy reread it once. Exactly. But then you have to pay for you guys. But shit. Fucking good game.

The game is fantastic. But you know what it is? It's the forgotten SKUs. The PC SKU is always an afterthought that's being handled by whoever's left. Depending on the publisher. Depending on the publisher. The VS SKU same deal. Well every publisher I've worked with that's how it's been.

The vast majority that is the case. But there are a couple that actually put the time in. But yeah games amazing. And it's the best co-op I've ever played. Speed is amazing. The best co-op. The best co-op. The best co-op.

Yeah. The best co-op. The decision of having the one active player that shoots and is originally more skill based than the passive secondary player. And then having the secondary player get more and more active abilities that matter more and more. Having the flashlight go from you're shining a flashlight to now the flashlight is the most important thing in the game to stun enemies so that your gun person can melee them.

Or having invisible enemies show up that only the second player can see. It's probably a terrible idea but I'm wondering what like a game like Bioshock Infinite would be like if it had that. It would be terrible. An Elizabeth player character that could be a fight. It could be good. Like it would obviously have to change but it could. It could have to change.

It's because Elizabeth does. The reason I say it's terrible is because an Elizabeth does almost nothing. Like if the original version of that game where Elizabeth did shit all the time. Yeah that'd actually be really cool. Even in the version that came out like Elizabeth does nothing. And I think it would be fun to like throw things at your friend the whole time and just nail her in the face with bottles. Lots of portal ripping abilities and things like that.

Use those instead of fighting them. But instead and now your main ability would be to throw a coin really fast at Booker's face. If it were like the previous one I agree it would be cool. It might be. You know what? I know you hate it. I really love when she throws shit at you and you get the prompt.

I don't hate it at all. I love it. I thought you hated it. No. I love it from a goofy perspective but I hate what it turns Elizabeth into. Sure okay. Elizabeth becomes a lockpick slash money fountain instead of a character that you're supposed to tag along with.

It's an active participant. She becomes Ranny the thief from the fucking Dragon's Frag. Run around picking up my gold for me and open this door. The whole game is hinging on Elizabeth being the super important character and you guys are doing it together. But then the gameplay implementation of that is she's a fucking power up. It's one of those things like no you shouldn't have had to defend her in fights because that's the worst but having her be super invincible and do nothing is just as bad.

Definitely. It's not just as bad. That's not true. But it's not great. You remember those ruts in Last of Us where Ellie was literally rubbing her face on clickers? Yeah sure. That's bad. But it's not worse than the fucking actual escort mission bullshit.

You know what? Yeah. Come on. You're right. It's almost as bad. I was going to say Revelations 2 like even in single player the co-op is good like it just works. Yeah I played the first episode by myself and like yeah it totally works.

Alright we got can you get more VP in raid mode? Can I grind for VP in raid? How do I grind for VP? Single player mode. Just so you can play countdown mode. You can play invisible mode. Or just play the campaign again. Yeah.

What's the fastest way to grind for VP? Just run through the campaign as quick as possible. Okay I'm going to do it. But like you know you should do countdown and invisible just to try it. I hate that shit. It's fun. Also all the in-game achievements give you big VP sounds. Yeah we noticed.

How do you see the enemies and how do you even know the enemies are there in invisible mode? Well you should know because you finished it already. No but like when you're aiming down a hallway and there's nothing how am I supposed to? You can use the flashlight to see them very briefly like very very briefly but otherwise it's just like you just got to play good. No the invisible enemies you can only do that with Natalia. Or do you mean Barry's flashlight?

No no even in Claire's thing Moira's flashlight in invisible mode. Not the regular and not the grasps but the regular enemies in invisible mode will be visible. Well he's talking about the regular mode. Yeah that sounds like the worst thing in the world. It's fun. It's fun. News wise I want to open up with a non sequitur animal fact from Levi.

Sure. Oh yeah Levi. He says he says a non sequitur non sequitur animal fact. Did you know that because bees are unable to pierce a wasp's hide with its stinger they surround it and create a dome? Certain bees. And then yeah certain types of honeybees and use the heat from their bodies which their bodies go into a heat generation mode.

Heat up. And it cooks the wasp inside the bee dome and that's how they fight off wasps. Yeah I knew that. That's the craziest type of shit. The thing that's amazing about that is they just know they can do that. You know what I mean? Exactly and they grabbed one and they like checked what its brain was doing during this process.

And it was barky now. And it goes into a mode that says heat my body up right at this end of my body but leave the rest of my body normal just to murder this thing. Just to kill the animal. I was born with this formation in mind. That's really cool. The bees from Yakuza really really cool. It does a jet stream attack.

It combines and fucking kills you in numbers. I'm surprised you didn't know that. I had never heard that before. Because that's step two of the rabbit hole of watching the hornets kill that entire bee hive. Yeah yeah yeah. But like the video describing what you're talking about is like the next on that list. Because I know what you're talking about.

But I never heard of them fighting back. I just thought they got wiped out. But it's like no we can actually surround them. Follow the thread man. Those bees went through a specific skill tree. That's some Starcraft shit man. Yeah it is. Those are designed for you.

Four Zurglings per zealot. I'd rather have this up. Did you see that fucking stupid Higurashi? Same here. Did you see that Higurashi video I sent you by the way? Oh my god. So good. So good.

It's the opening to Higurashi but these guys like green screen themselves into it. And they're doing the same anime stands. They're running on the water. The camera pans by as you like slowly turn your head and bullshit. It's unbelievable. And the best, the best, the best is when it does the quick cuts to extra third like background characters. And it's just random black guy, random Spanish guy, random Chinese guy.

Cut, cut, cut, cut, cut. So bad. For supporting cast. I love it. My teeth hurt. My teeth hurt. I'm glad. I thought you'd appreciate it.

Ah, cringe. So good. Anyway. I want to start out with the fucking coolest news that I read this week. Ever done sea. Hashimoto over at Platinum Games wants to make a Spider Gwen game. That's so specific. Now it's that.

It's so awesome. Which means? Your hands in the air. Which means? Exactly. Activision, published, Cora, Activision publishes Spider-Man games. Yeah. There's, there's, there's connective tissue here.

Because this can touch. This is, this is Edgar Wright saying, hey, that Ant-Man sounds like a fun idea. This is. No, it doesn't sound fun anymore. I'm out of here. Well, when the rulebook came down, but that's what, that's what it is. It's like someone on the outside goes, hey, I've got some ideas. You fucking trust that guy.

I'm sure this is like. I mean, this is just a thought. Maybe he'd really actually liked Spider-Gren for a long time. But like. Spider-Gren's like, maybe like six months old. Oh, is it that new? Yeah. I wasn't sure.

I wasn't sure if that was a reboot or not. The new like. No, no, no. It's just another alt world. Well, never fucking mind then. He saw that art and he said, yeah, yeah, yeah, Peter Parker's because I was going to say that's what got me into it. But I was like, I wasn't sure if it was a reboot or not.

Peter Parker gets killed. And then Stacy survives. Yeah. It's just, just I'm saying we have an idea for a Spider-Man game. Yes, please commit them to digital memory now. Save Spider-Man. Like that tweet goes out and suddenly Quebec City from making them like just dudes with fucking bankers boxes of old Spider-Man material start bringing them into the Platinum offices.

Like here's all your reference. Everything you need. We're going to be out back. Just call us when you're ready. It'd be so good. You know, Spider-Man's just like a Kamen Rider character. Well, yeah, actually, if you, if you, if you really think about it, he's kind of like a Tokusatsu hero.

Yeah. He's got the Leopold on him. I haven't done sick burnouts on the Spider fucking Spider car on the Tokyo town. It's a fucking go-kart with spider shit on it. Yeah. Right. Go ahead and say for the honor of King Spider on Planet Spider. That being said.

The Vinox to fly to Tokyo attack Platinum games for their livelihood. That being said, never going to happen in a standalone game. If they made like a spider like universe game, like kind of like Shadow Dimensions, they'd put a thing on there. Yeah. No, I was like, you can make a Spider-Man game and Spider-Man can be a costume. Are you happy now? Okay.

Fine. It was like, they like evidently now Spider-Man is like brand new. Like for someone of that profile to say, I want to, I'd like to make a game. I really hope they take note of that. Because they wouldn't make a Supergirl game or a Batgirl game or a Spider-Girl game. Nobody cares about that shit. Everyone wants this now. Well, in a way, like the main dude gets the fucking front bill.

So this would be an interesting downloadable title or something like that. But the fact that Hashimoto's like, yeah, do this, I'm tweeting it out there just to see what happens. It's like, yo. I'm tweeting it out there. I'm throwing chum in the water. It's like Kamiya going, I want to make a fucking Iron Fist. Star Fox game.

I was going to say Iron Fist. Okay, but Star Fox. You need a Star Fox game. Yeah, sure. You also arguably made several Iron Fist games. But the idea, like I like that idea though, because it's clearly like, I'm not saying I want to do this, but I'm saying like, let the fans drag it out of them. Yeah.

You go, go forth and do the bidding. Kamiya tweets out, I want to make a Deadpool game and everyone goes really man, like, zero retweets one favorite. Like, yeah. Like I'm pretty sure you already made it. That book fucking sailed. Not when that movie comes out. That movie is going to be amazing.

Is it Ron Riddle's? Yeah. Okay. So the other fucking great thing that popped up this week, and I hope you guys have seen it, Tembo the badass elephant. It's really cool. Please tell me you saw the trailer. You know what?

I saw this coming. I saw this announcement from a while away. So totally saw it coming. What? That Game Freak and Sega. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

And not publish it on Nintendo. And not on Nintendo. Yes. And it has the word badass in it to make sure Nintendo won't take it. The screenshots do not do it's service. The video is bad. You have to watch the video. This game looks awesome.

It is everything pure. To be fair though, this really belongs in 1995 on the Sega CD as a reject. It does, but it's not. It's not a PS1 game in Mexico, but it's fucking just pure. It's just pure video gaming and it's so good looking. I don't know. God damn these guys Game Freaker. They know what they're doing.

I don't really like Tomba very much as a character. The elephant motif is just like, oh, fair enough, you know, fuck you, but it looks really fun. I just don't like the way the character looks. I know. And that's fine, but fuck you, but it's fine. It's okay. I like Tomba.

I like Tomba. I like Tomba. Sure. This is directed by the same director. But the game looks really fun. This is directed by the same director as the guy they made Harmanite on the 3DS, I believe. English guy that works at Game Freak, actually. Just platforming, man.

Just good old fucking platforming, collecting the peanuts right away and you're just like, yes. I hope it's good. I look at that video and that could either be the worst thing to play ever or really good. I see the ground pound and then the fighting and the boss fights. The ground pound through what, like 20 stories of building? Yeah, because you're an elephant. You're an elephant.

Just looking at the screens, obviously we're going off this video, but it seems like the scale of the levels is really big and I'm excited about that. I feel this has a bad title. It should have been called Operation Dumbo Drop. You know what? When you're right, you're right. Yeah. It's hard to get that trademark.

Are you watching the footage now? Yeah, that's a fucking video game ass video game, man. Right? I think it would be hard to call it Operation Dumbo Drop since they renewed the trademark to put that in KH3. I just, I just, just finished watching it. I just got to save that. That looks awesome.

They got to drop an elephant and Sora's got to kill it. Yep. Actually, funny you mentioned that because there were footage of the things that happened. There were footage. That's great. You noticed that too, Liam. There was footage of, or not even footage, pictures from your canceled iOS cake and heart game.

Fragmented memories or fragmented? Fragmented fan fiction. Okay. Looking at the designs in, in the fucking, in this one, I hope KH3 goes that far because it will enter bullshit land designs even harder than never has. Those two characters are, they're out of the fucking parking lot Kingdom Hearts video. Oh yeah, you're right. Exactly.

You've got dude with fire pants and girl with like pink black outfit. You guys probably know where I have to go. And they're Keyblade wielders because someone, so, so the fact that this is canceled is good. I, even if it was going to be a good game, because it means that maybe, just fucking maybe Square Enix has realized they may have spread that franchise too thin. Hey though. This is the hardest to keep up with franchise that has ever existed. But you're forgetting Kingdom Hearts cheap.

I don't even know what that is. It's a browser game that came out like a year ago. The fact that this game's actual legit story is spread across every platform to ever exist. Except for Xbox. Except for Xbox. No Xbox, no Game Boy Color. Like you fucking assholes, you, you, everyone involved in this is an asshole. The amount of fucking, can you imagine what the previously on for Kingdom Hearts 3 is

going to look like? Previously on. Nothing. Because every time it's nothing. Wait, what do you mean you didn't play the Jaguar game? That was really central to the plot. Didn't they already like effectively make two previously on's that just recap the days one and birth by sleep?

Yeah, the HD collection. Yeah. But hey man. But hey man. It's got Tron. It's got Frozen. It's got Wreck-It Ralph. It's got Wreck-It Ralph.

Well Tron was already in another game. Yeah. Tron was in the, I think, Optimus. Yeah. It's got Star Wars. Yeah, no, but hold on, hold on, hold on. Star Wars. Tron was in Kingdom Hearts 2.

Yeah. And it was Ultron. It wasn't Ultron. And this is Tron Legacy. This is Legacy. Yeah, Dream Drop just inside that. Oh. Yeah.

Oh yeah, he's right, he's right. They had the Legacy motif. Well, you'd be really great if like they can't actually get any Marvel characters except for like, Sora just walks in and Agent Colson is there, he's like, hi. Hey, I'll be honest. And that's all he can do? Like there's no powers in the spirits. I actually don't want there to be Marvel or Star Wars characters.

Why? Because when I think Kingdom Hearts, I think Disney. Disney. Are you like Pirates of the Caribbean? It's, no, I didn't plan to be perfectly clear. I didn't even know Pirates was in it. That's fucking garbage. No.

Liam, are you even playing Kingdom Hearts 2 at all? No. Liam, I agree to unexplored. I don't know what he's talking about. You haven't even played the second game. No, but I just don't, like when I think of it, I just think that's pretty good. I agree. I think Disney.

Because I play Chain of Memories. Which means Spider-Man and Luke Skywalker. Yeah. Look, I agree to an extent because those universes are so fucking colossal on their own. It's a rabbit hole. Yeah, exactly. What do you pull out of those to represent the entire world? Yeah, but here's the thing.

That too, exactly. It's like if you had played... C3PO and Spider-Man. If you had played Kingdom Hearts 2, like at the end of that game, they just say, fuck it, and give everybody lightsabers, like actual lightsabers. So lightsabers already exist in Kingdom Hearts, and half of the villains use them. So... That being said...

Putting in Darth Vader as a boss, pretty good, I don't know what to say, you fuck me. That being said, this cancelled, these cancelled screenshots reminded me of how sick the Cave of Wonders looked. Do you remember? In Aladdin? Yeah. Fuck, that thing looks cool. I forgot about it.

So good. Outside and inside. The whole thing. That's great. What an awesome design. It's like, you don't make Capcom vs SNK, and instead of making Capcom vs SNK 2, you make Capcom vs SNK vs Sammy vs another thing. It's like it cheapens the ones that came before.

No, no, crossovers are only improved by more crossover. Yeah, but as its own separate series, not in the continuing line. But it's not called Square Soft plus Disney, it's called Kingdom Hearts. But it was Square Soft plus Disney for how many games? Two. For what it's worth. Two. I don't know if it's...

The original, Chain of Memories, the second. The second you already said gross Pirates of Caribbean are in there. That's not fair. The second you always owned. The other DS1, Recoated, Chee, like the vast majority of the series. It didn't really always own Pirates of the Caribbean because it was a theme park at Disney Park for years and years. It was the old ass ride for fucking Kingdom Hearts.

I want fucking Kingdom Hearts to include fucking Universal Studios, and have the JAWS level. It's neither in only Disney nor in each other. That's why I said Universal Studios, I want them to add... But they're a rival. Yes. While they're at it, they can just get rid of Thoron and play some Mega Man. That can be the swear of Disney people in a clash against the Universal Studios and

Fox Pieces. Buy that first. There's way more important things than Kingdom Hearts don't have to happen before that went down. Disney didn't have to buy Square to make it happen. No, they were a partnership. I don't care. Pat, you're crazy.

You're insane. I don't want 20th Century Fox in here either. Yeah, I do. Predator versus Sora? I don't. Do it. That's what Mugen's for. Every time this comes up.

Every time this comes up. If I want a crossover, if you've crossed over multiple companies, put another one. Put 10 more. Put it all. I just want video games. I want to remind you because you just dropped it, but there was an announced Sammy versus Capcom. There was.

That never came to fruition. I don't know if that's still on the table or not, maybe it expired, but it was out there. That would have been really cool. The contract says they can only start working on it after Street Fighter, Cross-Tech, and then it was out. One crossover at a time. Cross-Tech or whatever. If you want to talk cancelled shit, do you remember fucking what, four years ago when

they announced the new Inafune game? Yeah, Kaio. I already know. Kaio. King of Pirates. Kaio has been on my mental list forever of upcoming third party 3DS games. This thing, it feels like a lifetime ago, it was announced. I struggled to remember this.

Four years ago was before this show, so yes, it was. But I do remember seeing, I was like, that's an interesting premise. Why does this cutscene have such a low frame rate? It's like these cute little animal pirates doing their little war with each other. It was interesting and very, very Japanese, but I was like, sure, this could be a fun thing. Let's see what the genre is. Let's see where this goes.

Four years later, it has been canned and Marvelous just lost a ton of money on it. I think the reason is due to market change, which means nothing. It means this cannot live alongside Yo-Kai Watch. It is completely beat out. What was the genre? It doesn't matter, because it's for kids. Fuck. Yo-Kai Watch is beating Pokemon.

Like fuck. Yeah, you know how this is? It's just outsold Pokemon. You know how Skylanders fucking uses their Omega Red vs. Yo-Kai Watch to arrest. You know how Skylanders says their fucking weird genre designation for what Skylanders is like? Toys to life. Toys to life or whatever?

Yeah. It's a fucking lie. It's the kids' genre. Sure. Right? It leaves totally right. You get the big hit in the kids' genre and it eats everything, and that's why Disney's doing the fucking...

It's just... Skylander likes shit. Skylanders and Minecraft is the kids' genre. So they wrote it off because they can't afford it. I think so. I don't think that had a life next to Yo-Kai Watch, to be honest. I mean, the character designs were interesting. I think the main character design was cute.

Yeah, a little penguin with the... I think the other two characters were kinda mediocre. They were big guys, whatever. Yeah. But then you saw like the monkey and the other stuff, it was alright. That makes sense. It's not like this game has had tons of trailers and hype every... No.

It's like... No, no. It's not a trailer, basically. But it was very zacky. We could call it a concept. You know what I mean? Yeah. Intercept.

Right. Which... But it was concept at the time. Yeah. Four years ago, at the time. And then you check it out and it's like intercepts. It's like, what? Yeah.

They're changing that again. I can't say I'm gonna miss it, but there was a time I was looking forward to it. Well, I wish I knew more. How can you miss the thing you barely knew? Yeah, we really saw. Well, I missed Mega Man Legends 3 a bit. Yeah, but you knew way more about that because we knew what Mega Man Legends 1 and 2 was. A little bit.

And Cheryl, did you miss Metabots? Yeah, I always miss Metabots. Well, there will be Metabots news in 2015. There will? For North America? Uh, no. Stay tuned for it. Unless it's an anime, it means nothing.

Unless it's an anime, it means nothing. Natsume says they were asked about North American Metabots releases and of any kind. And they're like, unfortunately, still not in the plans. Talk off. But we're looking... But there will be... If you're a fan of Metabots, stay tuned to Metabots news in 2015. Do you know if it's a Metabots game like every year?

They've been going... Really? Yeah, in Japan. And they just never bring them over. Well, yeah, and the worst bit is the recent ones have all been on 3DS. You can't even import them. Like... Well, you can.

I can. Now. And I did. But like, it's not an option for 99% of people who like Metabots. I swear, whenever I turn on Metabots and I just looked at the animation, I'm like, while I'm done... Really? It wasn't great.

It wasn't great. No, but I... Compared to Digimon or Pokemon, like... I feel totally out of loop because... Right up until the part that Matt started making that dumb Metabots joke, I had never heard of it. Okay. No. I disagree because like, the Metabots animation style was loose off model is what it's called.

And it's like... So sad? To be... Yeah. I don't think so. I don't think so. I think it was a stylistic choice. So it was a stylistic choice to make it bad?

No. People in this room saying it's not great and it's horrible. It's different. It's all right, but it's kid anime quality animation. Oh no, so bad. I don't think it's bad. It's not bad. You thought Reboot had an ending.

It does. How can anyone... You thought Reboot had a fatal fury. But you thought it when you didn't know that. No, I knew it. No, you fucking liar. No, I knew it. You thought Reboot had a fatal fury came out...

Can't shoot your way out of this one, Pat. No, but those games keep coming out. So I hope it's an anime because I'll be able to at least watch that. Maybe. And you want to fucking see some cheating going on. Or I hope it's Real Metabots. That has been the wish for you. That is unexpected.

But there was a store in Akihabara that totally had robots that you could buy and trade. It's not the same thing. Because the gimmick for Metabots was you had the parts and you shove them all together and the metal made the deal. And it became a poison. Where the metal had a different... Metabee had a metal. Metabee was the special snowflake main character, right?

Yeah. But the rest of them were all archetypes. And you shove the archetype on the whatever gear and it was fun in that way. But like... Yeah. Well, you mentioned cheating and all I want to bring up is like, man, if you guys want to see some fucking high level bullshit cheating, hacking, garbage,

go into random Monster Hunter rooms for a while and look at the fucking impossible gear that people are wearing with completely axe stats. Yeah. Sick. Yeah. Okay, a month from now, if they're still around, they will never go away again. No, they've never gonna go away.

They've been in every game. Oh. And they'll never go away. It's always been like that. You can't catch them? No. They don't even try. It's too fast.

It's a co-op game. There's no versus. It's like they're only ruining it for the sells. And every person I've ever run into with hack gear is terrible at the game. Like absolutely fucked up. But yeah, could they start the game? Because they start the game and just go all the way to the top. Yeah, I remember playing Guns the Duel and all the shitbags that we put on all these fucking hacks

and trainers that would make your guns fire four times at the same clip and make you run on walls forever and shit. And if you actually fight them, they're awful. Yeah. They all suck horrible at the game. They just have these gimmick advantages. And just relied on them and never got good as a result. It's...

Yeah. Anyway. See the new Digimon game came out in Japan? It's fucking awesome. Yeah. And the reviews are good and it's selling. A lot of people like that stuff. So fucking excited for that.

Localize it. Digimon stupid. There is relevant news this week. They're real. They're real. I saw one Digimon. It was in... Okay, guys.

I saw it in my TV. I turned you on and it said you flashed onto it way harder than I ever did. It wasn't just static because it looked like Gururuman. I once went outside and I saw... You just didn't latch onto it hard enough. I sent him that forum. It's so good. But you sent it without going to...

A bunch of metal bullshit strapped to it. I'm like, look, it's an ugly Digimon. Yeah. It's Riptor. Yeah, you're not even wrong there. You're not wrong. Anyway, relevant news to this week. Interestingly enough...

But only to this week. Hawken has been purchased by Reloaded Games. Who were they? The guys that made APB. No, no. They purchased APB Reloaded. They brought back APB. They were the guys who took APB and made it good, although it never took off.

Or good or okay. All they resurrected it. Well, they resurrected it. It was way better. Yeah, exactly. They resurrected it. They took a dead game and fixed it up. Hawken didn't die, but they're coming along to resurrect it.

So now a lot of speculation is going down about, was it actually doing okay? Maybe it wasn't, right? Maybe this helps prolong it because they bought it for whatever price they bought it for. I mean, I don't know because I didn't follow it after release, but I've never heard people talking about it outside of when it was originally announced. Hawken? Yeah. And so I get the sensation that the player base isn't huge. Okay, I heard two things about Hawken.

There's a very clean player problem with it. One was when it was coming out. One was originally announced, you know, that... 2011. Oh my fucking god, this is a look at this game. 2011. And then when it came out, it was me saying it and other people saying it like, man, the fucking time and unlock shit on this egregious thing. Yeah, but that's not what like shut down the thing.

No, I'm just saying those are the only two things I've ever heard about Hawken. The actual problem is that it's been in early access for three years. That's way early. Selling it to these guys might totally be the right choice because they took a game that was even in a worse shape than this and they made it pretty great. But there's nothing outright broken that I can feel except that I know that... Well, that's not true. That's not true. There's broken shit, but it's broken shit pertaining to your account and things related to your account.

Okay, so now it's for resetting data, yeah, store it, like a lot of that stuff. But gameplay-wise, I didn't really shoot too much of a problem. But yeah, this is causing a lot of people to speculate that, hey, maybe it was in worse shape than we thought it was. And it was just holding up a big face, you know? There were some things with Hawken that turned me off, so I'm eager to see changes. When we see Hawken reloaded, you know, what's it gonna be? How about just Hawken, period, and not with an early access thing on it? Yeah, you're right. How about just that?

You know what, I know you don't have it on the docket, but I just want to put it out there. And Monster Hunter sold so fucking much better this time around than it did last time around. It's been doing better every time, though. Yeah, but this time it's enormous. Three times as much in the West. Yeah, but it's one of those franchises, dude. And then the next one's gonna do way better than this. Yeah, I know.

It's good, it's good. That's how mega franchises work. I totally passed my time on 3U with 4U. In less time. Way less time. That's nuts. I passed 190 this morning. You should see your doctor.

Ask your doctor about Monster Hunter. So there's a bunch of you. You have erections lasting more than four hours. More than a hundred and ninety hours. Yeah, I mounted it. Yeah, I don't know, you probably don't have it on there, but like Pat was saying, yeah. 3DS, new 3DS launched. Oh, did really well.

NPD sales are finally out. Majora just fucking killing and destroying everything. It's the month of the M's. Yeah, Majora was the fastest selling handheld Zelda of all time. Okay, do you know what this also says? Get Grezzo to remake a lot of other stuff. Get Grezzo to do an original 3D Zelda. On the fucking handheld.

Yeah, why not? That's what I would like. Don't touch our babies. Oh my god, that would be amazing. Like, how much could they have possibly learned? Yeah. That would be amazing. Like seriously, honestly.

Hey, we took this whole classic and made it way better. Did we make our own? Hold on one second, if you'd be interested. Like in my retro game magazine, they reviewed Majora's Mask and they're like, it's great, ninety-three percent. Here's some other games. It would be awesome if Grezzo would remade it and goes, remake Sin and Punishment 1 on the 3DS. And they're like, how sick would that be? It would control way better for one.

It would sell way worse. It would be good. It would be good. I can't fight that. It would be good. A couple of other games, too. Yeah, so Majora, fastest handheld selling Zelda ever. 3DS family.

All models, outsold PS4. New 3DS XL alone did not outsell PS4, but very, very good sales for it. And PS4 is over 20 million now, so congrats. Sure, yeah. And then Monster Hunter, like 290,000 units, biggest launch. And then 290,000 units in the UK. People are buying things. I'm pretty sure that's the US number.

No, no, no. Am I crazy? The NPD, and like the chart you're thinking of, did not have the American numbers, the North American numbers for Monster Hunter. So Monster Hunter sold like almost 500K in the West so far. I'm pretty sure there was a number. Regardless, it sold 500K, but like lifetime. Yeah, yeah.

And 3U sold like 300 on 3DS and 90 on Wii U, lifetime. So we were talking about it the other day, but it's like, huh, you think maybe if you launch new hardware with killer app quality software, you think maybe you'll move some units? Fuck. Yeah, we had a fucking hour long discussion about this. I think the last hardware that succeeded at this was the Wii with Twilight Princess and Wii Sports on the same day.

Two of the best games to ever release for that system. And then like, if you look at other hardware launches since then, I think like the only games that have been killer app quality were Zombie U and New Super Mario Bros. But that's like not enough to move. Not now and not for a console. Like the quality is there, but it didn't have a big seller like Zelda and Volt for Mario Bros. Or Mario 3D Land.

Yeah, it was Zombie U, it wasn't Day-Z. No, exactly. It was Zombie U's Waiver. But it's like you look at the Xbox One and PS4 and those took off because of the thirst. The very real thirst. There's no games out for it. I don't care. Yeah, exactly.

And then like... Like if the thirst wasn't so dire for PS4, like I would have waited until next week to buy one. And then like Wii U just ate shit because Nintendo Land was its best game and Zombie U was also fantastic. But it wasn't like a seller-seller. You know, Zombie U didn't like the charts on fire. Yeah, an extremely difficult like the road...

Not road bike, but a difficult like hardcore, like easy to die, survive a horror game. Yeah. That's not going to be your big one. With a name that was so bad because it was playing off like an original Ubisoft game in the 80s called Zombie. Zombie is Ubisoft's first game. That's probably the biggest mistake of that game. It's kind of funny though, but yeah.

It's funny. It's good trivia. Thank you for making that trivia piece, Ubisoft. And then like what? The 3DS launching with the terrible price point of 250 and like almost nothing in its lineup. Nothing like super significant. It was all ports and pilot links and Nintendo. But the history repeats itself, man.

Like the launch was not launched. No. The killer app launch game. The launch thirst is real. The launch thirst is real. I think like every major console hardware launch is never going to be great. They're going to get worse over that. But they should be.

They should be because the company has learned multiple times. We were talking about that. It's harder to get ready. It is. It is. There were several years that the Expo and the PS4 were supposed to be announced and then not announced at E3. How were more launch games not ready? You know what the worst launch is?

They're like five years to work on launch games. You know what I think the worst launch is for the anticipation of said console? It's like nothing beats the PS2. Like there was. Fan division. Like. A second tag. A second tag.

Here's the thing though. It's still an arcade port. Right. Developing in the dark, which is the new console. Yeah. Figuring it out a lot on your own. You barely have any support forums up and running. Versus in year three of a console's life cycle.

Night and day. Yeah. Of course. It's like playing darts facing away from the board with a blindfold on. You actually don't know what you're doing. Yeah. So that extra time doesn't actually amount to extra time. See, if you were old Capcom and you had made an engine that you'd make the game on PC

and then you then program in how to port it. Libraries. That would be a way to actually do this kind of launch game because you make the whole game on PC and then you spend your time making the port thing go. And you might be able to get it out on time. But then you're not going to be optimizing. There's other stuff. But yeah.

That's generally why though that launch thing sucks. I think PS4 had a really strong launch. Like more than anything I feel like now though. I already did the Jaguar wrap. How far away is this? Is this two years of the PS4? Is this one? I can't even remember.

What? It's one in a bit. It's November. One in a bit. These consoles should have fucking come out this holiday. The holiday. The fast holiday. I disagree with you.

Keeping the... If we kept up with... Completely. But in terms of software launch, yeah it's not been as good as it should have been. Yeah. No. But I disagree with that. Then everyone should have tried harder two years ago to get their launch line up.

Four years ago. Four years ago to get their launch stuff up to top. So we were talking about Marvel. Marvelous rather. And through some weird backwards shit. Marvelous now owns the IPs, Joe and Mac, Fighters History and Burger Time. They got Burger Time because they got all of Data East stuff. Dude can you please just release Burger Time?

No, really Joe and Mac. There's just new Burger Time on PSN? Yeah. I don't want a new Burger Time. I think it has the old one. I think. Because Data East had their properties bought out by G-Mode. Which is a mobile Japanese company.

Not to be confused with G-Rev. No. Which is the awesome fucking shmup guys. And G-Mode now sold all their shit to Marvelous. Good. So Marvelous. I don't mind if you're a mobile company who sells all the brands. Yeah.

Like if you become the store locker to hold them brand so it doesn't die. And then someone else just like passes the baton off and you know you don't have it anymore. That's fine. Exactly. That's great. You bought them for whatever you wanted. You're a place holder company. So what you're saying is that Karnav lives on.

Karnav lives on. He's circling around in the cosmic ballet. Karnav will appear in the next Senran Kagura. He will return. Along with Piero. I can only see these games coming back as like. Completion things. As like M2 style ports you know.

Yeah. Like yeah polished up ports. I think more like PS4 and stuff. No. Do it like Sega. I don't see them spending the time. Like you can do it like. Dude it's the same amount of time and you're going to sell more units.

Do it like Sega did with the Genesis emulator on 360 and on PSN where they just straight up go hey dump our ROM into this emulator thing. More or less. And then like port that. More or less. Yeah. Like I don't see them making a new Karnav or like bad dudes or any of this stuff. Joe and Mack are coming back.

Unfortunately. Not in the shape that's. It's cool that they got them but. You know what Joe and Mack should be a hard edged hardcore golden axe beast rider style reboot. The same art style. The same art style. The same art style. And there's and there's no there's no two player mode.

Oh God. There's a bunch of new games as well that popped up like and a lot of them are. Hey can I just segue. I'm going to take this segue. I'm ruining your segue to take this one speaking of dead brands. You guys saw Seha girls right. Sure. And it's like super funny.

The the funny Sega. Sega console. No speaking of dead all the brands inside. Sega is dead. There's a new Seha girls cross Neptunia game coming out. I'm super excited because they're going to get all the old Sega IP. Did someone literally look into your brain and make a game. You know what.

Like they announced it. And it. I'm my mind. Is that the first Seha girls like appearance in a game. No. Dreamcast is in Dengeki Bunko fighting climax. They all appear. As a striker.

I think so. I don't see you on the cards. They all appear in some mobile game and they all appear in Japanese. Japan only Vita like free to play game. I can. I can. But this is their first maybe playable appearance. We don't know.

I can understand why you would be excited to see the Seha girls in like a real video game. But at the same time like. I saw like there's the video going around of that and the fucking thumbnail for the video is to say how girls versus Jeffrey and VF one. Yeah. And I look at that. The main character in that show. I.

If you haven't watched it. Jeffery McWild. I look at that. And I actually want to cry. Because virtual fighter might be dead. Just. Right. But what.

Dude. We all have to stomach that. No. Because at the. Dude at the end of Seha girls they do a send up to the streets of rage opening and I cry as well. Every time. Dude Alex kid comes in in that show.

Everyone comes in. Can't you just imagine Jeffery McWild going on the news. I for one welcome our DOA overlords. If virtual fighter lives on inside of dead or alive. Is that really such a bad future. If people from the people from the team. Go to tech poke away. And make it more like virtual fight.

Well no. DOA is DOA. And that's not. It's not. No. It's the worst. Well no. Because there's.

Like people that. Do you love virtual fighter. Don't want. People coming and turning their game into something else. I hope that eventually. Those people are creepy. And. No.

The game is good. As a fighter. It's actually. We don't want these virtual fighter plebs ruining the purity of our fighting. No. No. You know what. No.

Just ban more. Ban more costumes. That'll clean it up. Wally. Unless they change the game. Far enough. That low punch becomes the best move in dead or alive. You need to change your standards.

Because. What you say. Would you would react so poorly. If I told you that about. I don't know. Reboot. If we were talking about. Straight up.

If we were talking about any game. Prior to. If we were talking about any game prior to DOA 5. I'd be right on your page. DOA 5 is just. Is nothing. Let's. Let's just hope.

Not even close. No. Let's just hope that every VF. Fighter characters. And two less DOA. There you go. That's all right. Until eventually.

DOA 20. Is just. Virtua Fighter 6. The VF. Replace a plank on the boat. Each time. Yeah. How many planks.

Until you don't have. The same boat. Wally. Exactly. I'm not. Totally. Unreasonable. The VF.

Characters and DOA. Play shockingly. Well. To their VF. Incarnation. Dudes. Dude. But.

It's just a bad future. If they end up surviving in DOA. As opposed to oblivion. No. I prefer oblivion. Well. You're stupid. You're crazy.

No. You're stupid. Well then. We're moving on. Incredibly stupid. And the world looks and goes. All right. Pat.

Okay. If you're going to get a hamburger. And it has fucking mayonnaise on it. You throw that shit in the trash. Exactly. And so. All right. Pat.

Moving on. I'd rather starve than eat mayonnaise. What we're going to do here is we've got a bunch of different games. Because it's poison. But there's so many other people who want to eat that hamburger. You can't. I know. I'm not.

You can't. I'm already gone. I didn't say anything. Here's the next topic. Here's the topic. There was a game. Liam. You're completely right.

Called. The only thing is. Is that the mobile. The browser beat him up. No. No. It's not on me. And I don't care.

It's a city FPS. On to them. Mana like top view ball throwing action adventure games. Called cross current. Okay. And I don't know if you guys have seen any of it. I have not. It looks pretty gorgeous actually.

And I think. Don't fuck up the recording. You'd have to move out of the way if you want me to help you out here. This plays really well in the podcast. Well, we'll talk about it a little bit. But it is a Kickstarter or Indiegogo I believe actually at the moment. Indiegogo. And it's interesting to mention.

We need the money now. Indiegogo is a good place if you don't want to succeed as much. Yeah. It would have done better on Kickstarter. Hold on. Hold on. If you need the money. Yeah.

Oh, I saw this. Yeah. You don't need to succeed as much. But you need to succeed now. Now. Now. Now. Now.

Now. Now. Now. Now. Now. Now. Now. Now.

Now. Now. Now. Now. Now. Now. Now. Now.

Now. Now. Now. Now. Now. Now. Now. Now.

Now. Now. Now. Now. Now. Now. Now. Now.

Now. Now. Now. Now. Now. Now. Now. Now.

Now. Now. Now. Now. Where's your number? Just say it. I'm Здith. I got it.

I got it. I got it. Now. Now. Now. Now. Now. Now.

Now. Now. Now. Now. Now. Now. Now. Now.

Now. Now. Now. Now. Now. Now. Now. Now.

Now. Now. Now. Now. Now. Now. Now. Now.

Now. Now. Now. Now. Now. Now. Now. Now.

Now. Now. Now. Now. Now. Now. Now. You're home.

How did you see that last night? All right. I'm glad you got the shoes today. Let's go back real quick. Just go back. Yeah. Before I even look at it. I want to read the description.

Death Gambit is a challenging action RPG. Where you explore an alien medieval planet filled with these nice and horrors. Wow. I've never read that line before. Yeah. And this is... What does it look like? A friend of mine had exactly this type of game planned out that he wanted to make.

That's just the Hyper Light Scarf. And... It's just the Hyper Light Scarf. Um, but like in action, right? Very nice sort of style. There, there. You have a shield. You have a sword.

You go through towns. This reminds me of Slain. It reminds me a lot of Hyper Light Slain. Right. You're crawling. You're grappling. That's pretty cool. Up a colossus.

Yeah, but I can't do this again. But it's... It's not even... You haven't even done it yet. I know, but I can't do this again. That's what I mean. No, one of these... Let them come out.

These Hyper Light needs to come out before I can put my soul into something else. Right. That's a sick-ass boss fight on time. This looks exactly like Slain. Like this... You know what I mean? It certainly does. We're seeing some sword and sanctuary-style shit.

We're seeing... Salt and Sanctuary. Salt and Sanctuary, rather. It's all there. That looks like a Hyper Light guy. He's a zombie Hyper Light. There's nothing uncool about this. It looks really cool.

Except that I just... Except the itch has already been scrapped. It's really hard. And now it's bleeding. My arm is wrecked. Oh, that horse section is really cool. Yeah, horses are cool. That's all.

It just doesn't like them. The time is not right. That's the only problem. The time is not right. But they thought the time was now. But it's not, John Cena. What's better time than now? Like the iron is fucking melting.

There's no iron left. You're stepping up to the podium with no audience. Exactly. The audience is all at home. It looks really cool. But it looks really cool. But I can't do this again. There's eight of them.

Nine of them. Maybe ten. All you ladies are banging on my doors. I can't even burn in. I have currently like a dozen back kick starters. Maybe two of them have come out. Are you even counting eternity? No, because it's not out.

Shadowrun came out and Shovel Knight came out. I did Vulgar and Shovel Knight. And I recently got the fucking technical alpha for Kingdom Come. That's coming. Dude, that thing is pretty. Like they're not joking around. Like we're making a fucking open world RPG for PC. Because my thing is screaming and dying as I look at this grass.

That's the grass I've ever seen. Yeah. And I currently have like a ten that are just like, yeah, wait another year. They're also bringing back descent on Kickstarter. I'm sure you're excited for this. With the Oculus. Your love for descent with the Oculus Ref.

The multiplayer descent. That game's a multiplayer game. It's like the stupid shit aside. Microtransactions. I took a look and... Well, he tripped down the descent hole as a kid. We don't need to get into it. It's a deep hole and you don't know which way is up.

It's no forsaken, but... The future is forsaken. Did you watch the Kickstarter video for it? No, because it's multiplayer and I don't give a shit. Okay, did you? Period. Multiplayer, so I didn't even... Well, I looked at it.

Because of my descent, I owed this much. Yeah. And I just... Even if it was not multiplayer, I wasn't feeling it. It's also got microtransactions. If you look through the pledge stuff... Yeah, but if you look through the pledge stuff, one of the higher pledges is Lifetime Subscriber.

So is it subscription based? Maybe. I don't know. But I know enough to not care. Where's the fucking Spectre VR reboot Kickstarter? That's what I want. Spectre's where it's at. Well, you could always take a look

at the spiritual successor to Banjo-Kazooie. Project Ukulele. You saw that new update about it, how they're making the not rare cinematic universe, and I know I've said this three times, but they're literally calling it their own universe, where we are making characters so captivating. Okay, so here's what happened.

That we have to spin them off into double reading. They were making... Exactly what I want to hear. So here's what happens. I love it. Because that's that. I don't know if you're being sarcastic. No, I honestly don't know.

They were making knuckles. That's an advent rising to human life. We are so good. We have games in advance. I don't like that. They were making Knuckles Chaotix, and then the Sonic brand part got ripped out of it, so they're like,

we'll just ship the Chaotix. And every one of these characters is good enough to make its own game. I don't believe they're... All of those in Chaotix are good enough to be their own character. I don't believe you, and I don't believe them. I don't think Banjo-Kazoo is good enough to ship his own game. Until they show them?

He should have stuck it to the conversation. The reason I'm only happy and optimistic is because we haven't seen the characters yet. And I think the idea with the Silhouette is worth nothing. But here's the thing. Rare, and these aren't everybody at Rare, but some of the main guys at Rare,

the character design was never their strong suit. So wait, because the story... Look, it's Manic Mailman, the discreted ghost. But the story takes a turn for the sadder. Because at the same time, there was at... What the fuck was the recent event? GDC. At GDC, there was an audience participation game

where you had to keep Banjo-Kazooie, Banjo-Kazooie afloat through audience, like connect movement itself. That rare demo, yeah. And it's just like, only you, only your love can keep him alive. It was just a demo of something rare. It's a fact that you have to kind of do a motion control thing

except it was super uncomfortable. Give Banjo your energy, audience. I wouldn't just let him drop. I don't give a shit about Banjo-Kazooie. Oh, really? I love Banjo-Kazooie. He's alright. Well, the classic one, he's alright.

See, there's some nostalgia there. I never had, do you? I remember. I never fell in love with him. I would borrow my friends to play games there. Yeah. So the first time I got hands-on on Banjo-Kazooie was like six years ago.

And I went, I don't get it. This isn't as good as Mario 64. Did you ever touch Donkey Kong 64? No. Good. Good. Okay, just check it. I saw it.

I saw it at my local video place. And I looked at it for like maybe 15 seconds and somebody played. It was like, boom. That game is such a bummer. That's the first- We're at Wally's old place where James Small booted up Banjo-Kazooie and that's the boss with 360.

And he's like, yeah, guys, it's fucking, it's ace this game and everyone's just sandbagging this game. That's super hard. That's the first Banjo-Kazooie game I played. That is the point. I'm sorry, James, you're listening to this. You are the wrongest person I've ever seen.

About nuts and bolts? That's the only thing where I will disagree with him. But you know what? To be fair, if they went a little bit further with it and it was Minecraft, that could have been fucking- Yeah, but it wasn't. Instead, it was a pile of shit.

I unfortunately have- It is unfortunate. No, I have some love for Banjo-Kazooie. That is incredibly unfortunate. I want to see it. I'm really excited to see these games. I want to see it. Yeah, I'm excited to see what genres they are

aside from platformers. Liam, I appreciate your faith and optimism because you haven't seen the characters yet. But saying these things before the characters are shown makes me feel so negative towards the possibility. I don't like Banjo. I think I like it as much as you do. Which is like-

I'm just really weirded out here. I thought everyone was like- He's a stupid-looking bear! Dude, I've never played them. He's a cool man. I've never played them. But it's just a clean old platforming game. No, but I've never played them.

So I have no idea. No, yeah, I guess. I've never played them. In my brain, Banjo-Kazooie is on par with Jack in half a step above Vex. Okay, but the reality is- No, but that's in another direction. But the reality is they're games that are not as good

as Rayman 2, but they're slightly worse. Sure, but I don't want to be that guy who's sitting there and everyone's like, oh, Banjo was so good and they go, oh, yeah, the classics. Yeah! I've never played it. Banjo wears a vest and there's a bear in his backpack. What an amazing character!

Something. To be fair, the original version of that game- We should do a whole podcast with two ugly kids that were like the kids from Nights. No, that's awful. No, it's- Two dried kids in shorts are better than a bear with a bear that lives in his backpack.

Absolutely. But I don't know how accurate that noise was. It's fine. It's probably really good. But I'm really excited to see these characters. I'm excited to see actual rare doing things to see what they're doing. If you want to talk about a rare character that I really like,

fucking tell me that Conker is going to make a fucking game. That's just a squirrel with a vest! Yeah, but he's an asshole, so I like him. That's true. But then Microsoft actually owns that character, so Rare can't- Please enjoy Project Spark. Project Spark's good, right?

Did you play it? Please enjoy this character you want in a game you might not want. Sure, but I just- I downloaded it the other day and I was like, Oh, wow. There's just another character. One of these fucking characters that they're talking about is just like a chipmunk that's an asshole.

You can see the silhouettes and they look like things, but not animal with vest. Okay. Watch their all animal with vest. No, they show the original picture with all the silhouettes and when they reveal all the silhouettes shrink and they change and they're just all animals with vest. I'm Donker the Rabbit.

Yeah. Exactly, Liam. That's the face. Yeah, exactly. That's the face. Give me a Perfect Dark 2D game. A 2D Perfect Dark? 2D Shooter.

2D Shooter. Shadow Complex. Shadow Complex. Yeah, okay. I can see that. No. Not Perfect Dark at all. Perfect Dark in IP only.

Yeah. But Shadow Complex in gameplay. You should read the Perfect Dark initial better. Microsoft owns that. You love the Perfect Dark, right? IP so much. I don't. I don't.

I don't read that. But good on you for bringing it up and name dropping it. That book is bad. You're giving Perfect Dark books power right now. Oh, it has no power. You just named it in front of 100,000 people. It has so much power. I got a copy of Perfect Dark Zero in my collection

for like five years and it has still never played. I will never. I'll come over and play with you. I've never played it before. But I'll come over and play with you. The wall guy. The face of the next generation is wall guy. There's two guys.

The wall guy was first, but then box guy on the PS3 was the other guy. It was untold legends. What's that? Really dumb. Yeah. It was the guy with black Kona and hair and a dumb helmet. He was holding up a box and that was like wall guy was the 360 and this stupid box guy was the PS3.

Everyone's like, get excited. Time to create is before release. Yeah. But face because like in all Perfect Dark where you use the Game Boy camera to take sure your face. Yeah. But that feature me on the end. No, it didn't.

But the old IGN64 guys. Yeah. I've got Kassimah, Kassimah, Kassimah. Exactly. Kassimah, Kassimah. Now. They fucking curb stomped untold legends with that. Yeah, they really did.

I always forget that game. Yeah, everyone did. Now. For good reason. It's only choice. The only thing anyone remembers it as is that game from super early that fucking New Gears. Man.

Now nuts and bolts never quite made it to the Minecraft level, but they probably regret that. However, I've never heard anyone say those words in the same sentence and you've got it twice today. However, because I'm going somewhere. Go somewhere. I'm saying that if not really take you for a ride. If they did, then they might have to worry about Turkey trying to ban them because apparently

Turkey is trying to ban Minecraft. Is it too similar to chicken? Well, one. People like it better than the country. Fuck me. All right. Move on. Excuse yourself.

No. There's no excuses for that. Turkey is trying to turn into like the way it gets these jokes worse and worse. Just keep digging. You're becoming more and more of a father. We're putting up the walls. Don't worry. I'm giving you screen time if you want it.

No, I just want to ruin other people's screen time. All right. They don't like the fact that it makes kids antisocial and they think that it encourages kids to kill creatures as a means of solving problems. It also encourages their country's name after a bird you kill an eagle. So like the first complaint there? I get it. Second one.

Come on. But also that's every video game. Yes. But also keep in mind that Turkish internet has been known for banning the entirety of YouTube from time to time. Does it really? Every page or like the homepage of Richard Dawkins, all of Fortune and Wikipedia articles that talk about human genitalia.

Some real conservative people up there in Turkey. No one learn. Stop learning. So why is this even news? If it's a country that consistently bans shit for no reason, they're like, oh, they want to ban my crap. Because it's such a... Hilarious extreme conservatism is always nice.

Exactly. Remember when Greece was being crazy about banning arcades? Now they have no money for arcades. Ah, take that, Greece. That's what you get. Ah, you're fucking broke. I'm sorry to our Greek listeners. It's not a fun time over there.

What? California has one year water left. Stay free, West Coast. Oh, I was reading that. That's hilarious. And everyone in the comments is like, we should just buy water from Canada. And I'm just like, we're never going to sell them water. Never.

But no. Anytime. Anytime. Another country. This is not even a country, but some crazy government is like, no video games. Yeah. You know Australia? And they just, they were calling...

Australia banning Hotline Miami too. And then like enacting criminal bum fights with future robots. Yeah, yeah. Like anytime a country is electing Jack Thompson to office and having him write policy, that's when it's like, that's news. I should mention something about Hotline Miami too, because I talked about it on Twitter and I got tons and tons of replies from people on Twitter about this exact topic. So I should, there must be a lot of people that don't know this because I would reply

and then get the same question like 10 minutes later. If you're in Australia and you want to play Hotline Miami too because it's fucking banned there and that sucks, the creator of the game and devolver digital have just said, just pirate it. Just steal it. Just fucking torn it. Wow. Yeah.

This happened like two months ago. And then when it was going into the ESRB, whatever the fucking certification is in Australia, the creator of the game, who the fuck made it? Australia game really gorgeous. Just said, hey, if you can't buy it in Australia, just steal it. And the quote is, don't feel free to contact, like, don't feel the need to contact us or send us money or anything. No, just pirate it.

Just take it. And then devolver digital said it was contacted because they were publishing it. Yeah. And it's like, do you... And they're like, yeah, yeah, yeah, no, fine. Because it's like, what are you going to say no to your biggest guys? I want to play the game. They're going to sell a million units in, like, a couple months.

Australia, if you, like, online make two, which you do because you're criminals, double down on the criminalisms. That says two things. That says devolver digital is awesome. And also, games don't sell well in Australia. So you can just say whatever. We don't barely lose anything. I think, I'm pretty sure it was the same guy as the Denison games when Holly in Miami came

out and it was on Pirate Bay. They went on to Pirate Bay. And did tech support for people that couldn't get it to work? They did tech support for people having issues with the torrents. In the torrent comments. Oh my God. And I think they even commented at some point, like, go download this one because it's a newer version.

Did they prompt the torrents themselves, I wonder? No, no. But they'd be like, no, no, no. Don't use this one. Well, it was an old buddy version. Use this new torrent. When they were asked about it in an interview, they said, like, you know, we don't think everyone is like this, obviously, but we get that there's people in their lives who don't have the money

and don't have the means. They have more time than money. And for those people, you know, we understand. So, you know. Well, let's see if... It's very nice of them. It's very nice of them. Because yeah, sometimes vital games don't make it over there.

Yeah, actually, a lot of them. Yeah. Actually, almost all of them. They instituted... Is there no combat coming up there? Let's see if WB... After the Ermac thing, do we have it? Let's see if WB is going to say, hey, guys, let's let in some...

Because after that Ermac fatality, it's like, how can Australia not ban that? Where do we go from here? That's a species. That's what that thread said. The Ermac fatality is a little extreme. Hey, guys, hey, guys, hey, guys. Here's Johnny. Here's Johnny.

Fucking... That's tame, baby. You shit for babies. No, you do. Compared to Ermac. But Ermac is pretty easy. Like, kiss your fingers like... Just...

That is... Like, that is fucking... Ed Boon. A classy-ass fatality. Ed Boon, if you're listening, you're not. If you thought that up, promote yourself. If you didn't, promote whoever did. Yeah.

Because that's like... Take the awesome Shao Kahn fatality from MK9. It's just the best fatality in the entire game that you can do. And then take Johnny Cage's from MK9, where he jams a dumb award in the person's neck hole. Yeah. Combine those. And just push it further. Yeah.

You get a great fatality. That being said, Pat was like, I was never a Johnny Cage fan. I hated Johnny Cage, right? That's awesome. I put it to the moment I saw that fucking fatality. I was like, Johnny Cage, but I'm like, what's the point of Johnny Cage and Sonya being in a game when their daughter, who has both their movesets and their personalities, and looks like Sonya?

Legacy characters. But now you see the family dynamic, which is hilarious. Which is nice. Because it's ex-wife. And like, Cass is like, ugh. Of course. I'll be honest. I'd still rather neither of them be there, because I think Cassie is so cool.

She's totally agree. I'd rather any character. She's totally agree. But I don't mind Johnny being cool. I don't mind Johnny and Sonya being in the story mode, but as full playable characters. I'm glad they're not married, Fry and Leela in the background while Cass is having adventures. Also, we must be really pissed because clearly Johnny is like, there's no noob, and I know you like noob.

Because he has noob's moves. His variation, stunt double, throws out the noob like guy. I didn't catch it. And he's able to do that. And he gets a bunch of moves. I guess I'm a Johnny Cage player. No, I'm playing Kotal Con. I don't care.

No, no, no. I don't want to play Kotal Con. I called it the least. I touched the game four years ago. Like, the first time I saw the name. He did. But I fucking pumped Gunshot in the back. But I called it at the other kiosk when you were attacked.

It was too bad. I'm doing it. Also. If everybody serves me, he's the first one I heard that goes, oh, Kotal Con's cool. I'm in there. First character I picked, so in there. You said you liked Johnny from that fatality. I hated Johnny.

And I liked him when he got the pock tattoo. What? But he got fucking the two pock like thug-like. Yeah, yeah. Except just Johnny like that. I love that tattoo. I didn't say Johnny Cage. You saw his victory animation.

He just writes out to my fan and throws it on the guy's dead body and goes, get it framed. And just walks off. Yeah. Also. Dude, their one-liners in that game are so good. So a full half of the DLC characters are going to be from movies. Did you guys get someone to no spoiler you that? No.

I got someone to no spoiler me that. What? Because I was like out of the house and I got that. And when I heard that, I was a curious friend. That's a curious friend. Oh, I thanked him. I kind of got that where I went into YouTube on that Friday. And I see Max puts up a video says Jason X teaser.

And I was like, ha ha, Max. I literally thought it was Max making something up. Right. I thought it was fake. And then when I looked at it, I'm like, holy shit. Who are Mortal Kombat? What are they going to put in next for me? Hitomi Tanaka?

Ranker? Who knows? Yeah. I feel like they could be. Punisher confirmed for Mortal Kombat. Punisher, Predator, and Jason is the golden pyramid. I just imagined him fucking. Striker replaced with fucking Fred Castle.

I can only imagine. Wait, WB, there's a way that can happen. I can only imagine it. No, there is. There is. I didn't fucking guess anything to this podcast quietly with nothing going on. And he hears that line. And he's like, Hitomi Tanaka.

Look it up. Just writing it down. Just write the name down. Do this for you, man. Thank you, sir. And you see him Google. I mentioned it. So she told me Tanaka.

And his eyes just kind of go like, why? The glass over. Yeah. Unreal Engine can't do this. No, you can't. From week to week. These are unreal. From week to week, we're getting closer to Matt Combat.

Matt Combat. I can't. Matt Combat X. I still think, I still think that's, I still think if they're going to put four DLC characters out, that half of them being for movies is too much. I agree. It's a little, like, let's say they have six, two. Yeah.

Not bad. Unless there's more characters coming out. Unless there's more characters coming out. But that comp, that sucks. That combat. I think we compare it to the actual original roster, which is pretty full. Dude, Chin-Ox in the game. Yeah.

Super confirmed. That's so lame. But no, but what I mean is that there's a lot of characters off the bat in the game on the disc. So, like, I don't, DLC, I don't care. It's DLC. I don't care about it. I feel no ways.

Do whatever you want, however you want. So wait, do you feel that way about Street Fighter Cross Tekken? No. No, no, no, no, no. There's a difference between that. And there's a difference between that and the way. Well, a lot of people hate it. But the way, okay, the way Blazblue had it, it was the fucking worst.

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. It's the character, like. But what I mean is, like, the whole, like, oh, cameos versus not cameos thing? Yeah. Have fun, man. I don't care, you know. Yeah, but I was telling Pat about this, like, Mortal Kombat fan base is like the really,

really hardcore where, the hardcore where they will make up a character, they'll Photoshop a character and say, this is tremor. You've talked about them before. Here is a render from Mortal Kombat X. The game you are making, trying to fool Ed Boon into thinking he's real and go, when? Yeah. There's 5,000 signatures and Ed Boon just goes, what are you fucking smoking? I work at the game, why are you trying to fool me?

And then they go, why did you kill Jade? You've destroyed the Mortal Kombat community. Yeah. He goes, no. But then, but then Jade was the least played character in MK9. Yeah. We'll say that. Is that a fact?

Yes. Wow. Not surprising. No. But she was annoying to fight with her invincibility armor. Right. But then Ed Boon gets on the phone and calls downstairs and goes, did we put tremor in the game? Yeah.

He's on the way. He's a creative director of the entire studio. Like, come on, give me a break here. That being said, just really quickly, Jason is, I wish they, that's his lame Freddy versus Jason design. I wish they would. You want Jason X? Jason X, obviously, as a, as a, not a de-called skin, as an old costume.

Because the game is Mortal Kombat. It makes sense. It makes sense. It makes sense. It's stupid, but it fits. Just use Sector and Cyrax textures, whatever. Oh, that stupid bastard Boon, he fucking put out that goddamn, uh, screen cap of two people playing MKX somewhere and went, what, what's the deal with these condiments?

And he had Photoshopped a, a, a jar of ketchup and mustard onto the screenshot. Yeah. He did. Sector and Cyrax have to be in that game. Yeah. Yeah. But. Come on.

I want, there are no cyborgs in the game as of right now. There's no robot. That is wrong. That's wrong. Something needs to change. You need ninjas and you need robots. Yeah. To go along with your magic kung fu wizards.

We're going to get, we're going to get, here's what we're going to get, calling it in advance. We're getting one cyborg and each of his styles will be a different. Maybe. Yeah. I'd be pleased with that. I'd be pleased with that. You know what that is? That's awesome.

That's the deals, the other DLC spots. But one carrot. We're getting one cyborg. Only if they're called ketchup and mustard. Cupsert. But pick, pick your flavor, you know? Yeah. And relish and smoke and whatever.

Ketchup. We got a PSA for you guys, by the way. If you bought ground zeros, depending on what platform you got it on, the save transfer thing, there's a chart for what's a safe transfer. There's a safe transfer from ground zeros to phantom pain. If you have one to PS3 version and you're moving to a PS4 version. If you're trying to get the bonuses that you get for owning ground zeros when you buy phantom pain.

There's bonuses? Yeah. There's extra costumes, there's a bonus mission. I didn't know that. You unlock a bunch of stuff, yeah. There's a bunch of little cool goodies you get for buying ground zeros. Oh, right. So if you have a PS3 version and you have PS5 as a command on PS3, you bought the first

chapter. And I'm assuming like your tapes and a lot of that other stuff as well. Maybe. Maybe. There's no facts on it. Here's to you on the in-game iPod. I just want to fucking the Zoey Asherix remix in there. Sure.

That song is like the best. But some of those fun extra guns, you know. But if you have a 360 version of ground zeros, you can go upwards or parallel. If you have a PS3 safe file, you can go upwards or parallel. If you have an X-Bone file, you can go upwards or down. But if you have a PS4 file, you can only go to PS4. You can't go down. Why would you?

I don't know why you would. But you can't. Yeah. Well, there's no PS3 and Xbox 360 versions of Phantom Pain. That's what I was confused by. They don't exist. But hold on a minute. They don't exist.

Let me look. This picture seemed to imply it. They are super confirmed to not exist. They don't exist. It's only a PC, PS4, and Xbox One. That's correct. But I thought the whole point of the Fox Engine is that it could be scaled. Yeah.

To three different platforms. No, it says PS3. So why is this picture officially released by Konami? It's not coming out on PS3. It says it on this shirt. It's not coming out on PS3. Well, Konami says differently. No, you're wrong.

So Konami is wrong. Yes. Yes. Let me see the picture. They're absolutely wrong. It's not coming out on PS3. That's because I got very confused. But I saw Last Gen and here they are.

Last Gen is listed up on every one of these things. It's not coming out on those platforms. It's straight up not announced. Well, maybe they're announcing it? Why is on Wikipedia this says PS3 and the Xbox 360? Oh. Because it used to be. Well, maybe they still are.

This is news. And this came out 14 hours ago, Liam. No. Dude, I know you're smiling at me, but they straight up don't exist. Okay. All the skews of the game went out for pre-order the other day. They don't exist. They never did.

For some reason, I think a JPEG from Konami is more official than your news. That's the thing here. That is not a put together thing by Destructoid. That's a picture from Konami in Japanese. Sure. Maybe they're only coming out in JPEG. And I find it weird too. No, not coming out in JPEG.

I find it weird to have a Last Gen release of these games considering we're fully in the net. I don't. If Ground Zeroes was on them, like if anything that should, they should have. Because the tech here was already, I just, yeah. That's really confusing. It's weird, but I believe it because they did it for the last one. Yeah, almost. I just kind of saw that and went, oh, okay.

And now the podcast grinds to a halt because everyone comes through their phones. Of course. You can wish, just going back one step, did you see how the Mortal Kombat X, the 360 and PS3 versions were bumped way back into an undefined date? Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There's a little bit of an, there's that. Okay.

Well, Matt, hey, what's up, man? Hey, what's up? Let's talk about Afro Samurai 2. No, let's not. What the fuck, man? We decided to make an Afro Samurai 2. We saw that at PAX and I said, we got to play that. Until these two get off their phones.

We got to play that. On my phone. All right. Hey, welcome back. We got to play that at PAX and we was like, yep, and we never did. Kuma's Revenge, man. That's cool. At least it takes the coolest character because it's not Afro.

I just, I don't know who owns that. It's Bandai. I don't know. Why? Is it? They put out the first game. What demand? What?

Who? Maybe Sam Jackson's billing it. Maybe. Because it seems like, you know, like, but maybe he's not even in this game because it's about another character. Yeah. I don't know. I don't know what to make of this game.

Everyone knows that the best, most unannoying character in Afro Samurai was Ninja Ninja. God, that fucking name. I remember almost nothing about that first game. What's up with that? No, no, the correct. You know what? You took the right path. Because Afro Samurai was something that like Riley and fucking Huey would watch in the

Boondocks kind of thing. That's right. That's what it should be. It's something on the- A show within a show. A show within a show on the TV in the background. Absolutely. And then it didn't.

It came out and had its own thing. And it's like, it probably should have just been a show within a show. I bet you the anime like sold a lot. Like a movie or whatever. I sure did. They did. And this artwork is cool. Conceptually, I love that name.

I love the idea of an Afro Samurai. I want to see Jim like fucking Kelly with a sword on his back. I want that shit. But it just, unfortunately, I don't know, man. It wasn't, it's kind of cool, but not really, you know? Plus the game is bad. Yeah, it doesn't help. And you had that dumb story when you had the game stop and some guy was yelling at you

about Afro Samurai. It was Future Shop. Yeah, at Future Shop yelling about Afro Samurai and the same guy went on to talk about how shitty of a button basher revenge exists. Speaking of button basher, did you guys see the sales numbers for DMC definitive edition in the UK? Whopper. Under 10,000 for both skews.

Speaking of, I played that. I forgot to say, it's way better than the original release. It's now pretty good. It's good. Instead of being like kind of mediocre, it's now pretty good. Now I have no reason to root against it at all, except for the fact that I want it to be so drastic a comparison to DMC 4 Special Edition when that happens, that I have another reason.

It's already dead. The story character is dead. I know, I know, you fixed it and I was going to be like, yeah, all right. But now it's like, wait, no, there's another thing that I want to create a gap that goes from heaven to hell. Jim Sterling put up a really good video this morning actually about DMC HD and just about how fans of the old games have been total assholes considering how good it is. Hardbomb.

Hardbomb. They put in the work though, but yeah, like, it's like the original release performed way below expectations and the re-release, like now all the resentment and all the bad feelings have now totally caught up with it and poisoned that game for a while. Alternate reality timeline. Special Edition is the first version of the game that comes out. The people who that are actually fans that were usually the loudest would begrudgingly go, yeah, it's pretty good.

I don't think it would have made a difference. I think it would have been the same result. I think the hatred for the change in the world. Oh, I think you're right. I just think that would have also happened. Yeah, I think, but I think- I disagree because it was a good game in the first place and people like still- I think it was a totally mediocre game.

It was a mediocre game. It was a mediocre game. It was a good game. No, it's average. I think it was all right. I think it was all right, but man, did the problems get annoying, you know? There were a few of those problems. It wasn't a 10, it wasn't an 8.

It's a solid 7. But if Special Edition came out as the original release, it would have probably still- I would think 5 is mediocre. No, 5 is bad. I think the reception would have still been a strongly negative just because of the world reset. Yeah, no, exactly. I don't think it would have made a difference.

And the world reset would have made a difference, but not a big one at all. Playing through it again, boy, is the world reset just as bad as it was before. The stuff that they do to Sparta's character in that, in particular, is the worst, is the worst. Don't remind me about that. And fuck you. You're doing that thing again. You're doing that thing again.

You're doing exactly the same job. It was great, that stuff. And like, they know that world reset was so fucking bad, where they even cut that line out about, like, the world is your bitch, and so am I, and I just got turned to put the world over a table and fucking- The literal coolest off-screen character into the literal weakest piece of shit, nothing garbage character. And the bosses are still awful.

Yeah. I beat Hunter in under 90 seconds. Um, well, before we hit the last news article, did that turn up anything? Yeah. It's coming at PS3. There we go. And 360. I don't know where this came from.

Yeah. Did it come out on a date? That's the other thing. Like, we can find the announcement that says it came, it was announced for Xbox One, and we can find the announcement, or it was then announced for PS4 and PC, but nowhere can we find where it was actually stated that it was coming to 360 or PS3. But I think Matt pretty much nails it though, it's like they released Ground Zeroes, which is the same fucking thing.

I'm not fighting that, just like, I've just been, like, in media create threads seven days a week, and everyone's, including myself, is just like, yeah, Ground Zeroes may as well be a PS4 exclusive in Japan, like. Five platforms. But in Japan, it's May as well be two. Yeah. Yeah. And like, I had the blinders on so hard.

Yeah, same here. It's weird. It's weird. It's really weird. Who's gonna play it? I don't know. I wonder. No, lots of people are gonna play it.

Lots of people. It's gonna sell over a million units on both of those hardware. Probably more than the current gen versions. I don't know more, but it's gonna sell over a million units on both of those for sure. Well, over a million. Yeah. Slow balling it like crazy, isn't it? Yeah.

Well. For something with five skews, no. Because this is a game that's gonna sell, what, it'll sell a bunch of millions, but when you really break it down, none of them are gonna sell over five each. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. We're in a moment where a Metal Gear game is on more platforms than we thought it was,

as opposed to just one. Yeah. That's a weird future. It is. So lastly, there's a fun little thing, and I think it was cool. How fun is this? Is it fun? Googlefeud.com.

You can play Family Food Feud with Google's Autocomplete. Are you serious? Yeah. And you have to guess what the Autocomplete is gonna be. What the survey said? And it tells you what rank it is, or how many results, and there's some fucked up results. How structured is this? Can we play that?

Yeah. You wanna try it right now? Yeah, let's try it right now. Let's try it right now. Right now. Let's try it right now. Let's try it right now. Live LP of Google Feud.

Okay, so let's just get off this death scambit page, where the gifs are just completely tanking your browser. There they are. And we're gonna go over to Google. Right under MGS5, right there, but blam. Googlefeud.com. Okay, all right. Choose Family Food's category.

People. Culture, people, names, questions. Let's go questions. I like questions. I would like questions, personally. Okay. Should I stop? I stop.

What? Jerk it off. Masturbating. Okay, all right. Liam, you're gonna have to type it in the keyboard next to you. Okay. How does Google Autocomplete disagree? Should I stop masturbating?

Survey says? Yeah. Number five. Answer number five is 6,000. Can anyone do the bing sound? Stop. You know? I can do the bang.

All right. Should I stop? Should I stop? Should I stop? Taking drugs. Okay. Mass on the board for taking drugs. Yeah.

Oh, it even has the big X. Okay. Should I stop drinking? Oh, that's a good one. Drinking. Number three. Should I stop drinking? 8,000.

Okay. We got two, right? Oh, Liam. Two guesses remaining. Yeah. I said masturbating. Yeah, no, but I said it first, so you gotta take something else. Let's like low ball.

Advices. Should I stop running? Let's just low ball and see where that comes. Yeah. No. All right. Back to me. I'm going to go with...

Wally, you're totally winning this. Should I stop shaving? No. No. So, number one was smoking weed. I said taking drugs. So, Matt wins. Matt wins.

No, because according to the rules... It's true. That's bullshit. That's bullshit, you're right. I was going to say cheating on people as well. Should I stop breastfeeding? Okay, so we've got number one is smoking weed. Number two is texting him.

Oh, that's drinking. Number four is talking to her. Oh, my God. Two and four. The same. Five is masturbating, and then we have six through ten taking birth control, drinking coffee, playing video games, talking to him, and breastfeeding. Oh, we would have never got the text being talking.

Isn't this great? I say people. Cook people real quick. All right, let's get another one. Seafood makes me... Sick. Whatever. He said sick.

Go for it. Number one. Number one. Ten out of six. I'm going to go with... Horny. That's the other one. Fat.

Okay, Pat's going for fat. No. No. Horny. Horny. No. What? Those clams.

Oysters, dude. Vomit. Vomit. That's going to be on there. Sick. No. It was sick. Gag.

Dizzy. Gassy. Purt. Dizzy. Itchy. Fart. Smell. Smell.

And there is no number ten. That sounds like a Resident Evil fucking note. Yeah. So there you go. That's a pretty good ass game. So that's good to go anytime, anyplace. Yeah. Googlefew.com.

Shit. And it uses the autocomplete. Game of the year. It's fucking awesome. That's super fun. Most likely to be frog fractions, too. It's pretty close. And what?

Maybe there's an eleventh option we could have clicked on. Yeah. You know? Like, man, let's take some letters. Oh, it's letter time. It's letter time. You can all send your letter in. What am I doing this time?

I don't know. If you want to send your letter in. What's wrong with you? I don't know. I don't know. Type zero's out tomorrow. I'm excited. Me, too.

I'm going to get it at midnight. Wait, did you just ask me what's wrong with me? And you just deflected by saying type zero's out tomorrow? Type zero's out. Okay, so first of all, your question is stupid because you know I can't actually answer you. It's too long. And two.

Yeah, fuck off. Anyway, if you want to send letters in, mail them to the internet. If you want to tell us. Send it to superfestfriendcast.com. If you want to take a guess of what's wrong with Pat, send it to superfestfriendcast.com. The doctors can't figure it out. We were going to get it. Modern science can't tell.

The fucking biggest spike of email ever. Like, you can't. I'm sure. I'm losing my hair. What do you want? Let's ask Google. What's wrong with Pat? See what the other complete says.

Oh, I'm sure we'll enjoy it. All right. Oh, we forgot to tell the story of when we were recording Parasite Eve at my house and somebody came to my door. Oh, that was great. Oh my God, what happened? That was so... Because I've been...

I've been... He's been talking stories about... So, will he just tell it? Just tell it. Just tell it. It's pretty straightforward, man. Just Pat's been talking about the bell people coming to his door for years and shit like how it's gone from just outright vicious venom...

Anger. Vitriol into anger into just different approaches. And so, right when we were sitting down to play Parasite Eve, we got one knock, knock, knock and Pat's like, who could that be? Get up, walk to the door. And I'm sitting in the couch so I can't see you. I just hear, hi there, hello. And Pat's like, hey, are you from Bell?

And he's like, oh yeah. And Pat's like, great. Slam. That's a sink. And back to Parasite Eve. That's fine. That's about right. That's a level you should keep.

There was one more step in there that you couldn't see and it's everyone who works for Bell has the name tag on their belt with their picture on it that has the bell logo. So open the door. Hello. Look. Then I have to ask. Yeah. And then they answer and I go, great.

And you be nice. You go, hey, great. Thanks. Slam. Like, like, like a fucking Homer style. Look at me. I'm making people happy. And I'm my only regret is that we weren't recording at the time.

Yeah. That's great. That would have been a lot of revelations coming out of the Parasite Eve thing. Your guys love a sperm. Dude, that arcana heart. Arcana heart. So a moment of the year. I need to make an addendum to a sperm related comment.

Apparently there is. When I was told that there is, in fact, mitochondria and sperm. And I misunderstood the original statement that was given to me is that sperm don't pass on their mitochondria to the egg. But they contain them. But the point is, is that the sperm mitochondria thing doesn't make any sense. Therefore, that means we take it back. Parasite Eve can be real.

No, no, no. That's what happens. No, because the sperm can't transmit the mitochondria to the egg. So the whole thing of like, oh, the mitochondria, no, because there wouldn't be any. The sperm dies and its mitochondria dies with it. Okay. But if it's a birth, never mind. Because there was no sperm involved in that original.

No, there was. It's just a non mitochondrial sperm. That just means the sperm can't swim. The little tail doesn't go. I gotta think of a question from Dipod. Is that about sperm? Hey, Dipod. Dipod says.

How's jury doing? Well, I don't know what Melvin was on about, but what the fuck do black people still like Naruto for? Yeah. I see my friends in college that still play the fighters like it's cool. Is it an obligation at this point? You know what? Also, fuck Blabloo.

I also don't know what Melvin was on about, but there is a point to be made here. You know what's my favorite thing? Black Kingdom Hearts cosplayers. Yeah. Strong independent Keyblade users that don't need no man. The best. The best. The best.

Now, all I know about this is that a mutual friend we have. Did you put this question to the council? I didn't post it to the council, but I'm sure the council. They would have an answer. I'm sure unanimously they would all shrug and give up. I don't know. I don't fucking know. Passively fart in the direction of the question.

All I can say is there's a mutual friend we have that was getting into it while we were on the way out. That's right. And tried to stop him. And it didn't work. But he wouldn't listen. No, he was too strong. And I haven't found out, but I assume he's naturally exited.

A dead. On his own. I thought you were going to say dead. No, no. I assume he found the door on his own. We were trying to show him where the door was. Yeah. And he was like, nah, man, it's still cool.

It's the same thing as Grandpa Simpson walking into the whorehouse. Yeah. Pretty much. We're going to take one from, oh, Jacob wants to know. Okay. Was Mech Warrior 2 running on DOS Box? Yes, it was. In the end.

Just letting you know. Nice, concise answer. I like it. It's rare that we get almost one word out of it. Because that game is old. In the end. Old as fuck. We got one from CellSplitter who says.

It's a good name. There's some best friends. I've noticed that whenever people play games, me, you, everyone, they always, whenever possible, try their best to avoid the critical lap path in order to search for goodies and other secrets. There's been so much of that going on in the past couple months with our players. It's been very hard to think of a way to form this into a question. But I do wonder how much game designers think about this when making their games. It feels like it could rob a game of its urgency and perhaps dampen the experience.

Damper the experience. What are the opinions on avoiding the critical path? Should every game have some sort of secret just around the corner? Thanks for what you do. I think that I like the idea of lots of discoverables in the room. But I like it being clearly indicated where progression is. Yes, yes. That's all.

Don't make me have to guess. We kind of had that a lot in Evil Within especially. And that was in a bad way. And revelations in which we could almost always tell which way was actually forward. Unless it's a roguelike or a Metroidvania where the point is the discovery. Because you're not walking into a locked room. You're just opening a new area. I remember a long time ago when I was looking at a making up for Gears of War 2.

And one of the artists was talking about the underground area where there's all these blue plants that look super pretty. And while he was designing that he was discussing how it's incredibly difficult to get players to look where you want them to look. Yeah. He would spend like six days on making some plants that look for a shiny vista that you get to look out on. And they would do playtesting and the fucking kids would turn the wrong way and just not see it. Valve had that same problem with Portal where they couldn't get players to look up. Yeah, no. And without getting an arrow on the wall, which they didn't do.

And in Half-Life 2, Episode 1's commentary, Gabe describes in detail, and I've used his example a lot, that it's so difficult to get players to look up. So the easiest way to do that is to put something that's dripping or a light source or something. So it's like, yes, you should always indicate clearly where progression is, but actually getting the player to look where you want them to look is incredibly difficult. In that sense, we're all basically dogs. Yes. Yeah, of course.

Dogs can't look up. It's just as long as you, like, if your game is built on a structure of walking into cutscene triggers and that forces you to move forward, no, no, that's fine. But as long as you make a rule, cutscene triggers only happen when you go through doors. Or something initiated. Exactly. That's what I mean. Because at the moments in which you walk forward in a game and your character starts to slow down and then transition into a cutscene,

you're like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no! I didn't want to go up and down. You said that already can't turn around. Yeah. And that's the one thing. If you don't have that and you can go freely anywhere, then do what you want. That being said, I dislike it greatly. If I feel like a game has really good level design, and they don't take advantage of it by putting something in,

like, it was two games recently, like Shadow Warrior and Wolfenstein. That's just every corner. There was some type of room, hitting goody, whatever. I like looking around for those things. And if I don't feel like a pressing need to finish this game, I like turning the camera on every fucking direction and trying to find something to pick up. I think if every game had a crazy amount of hidden shit that's just the opposite of the way you would go, I'd get so fed up so quick.

Yeah, I would want it. And I mean, boring that every game. If you say that again? If every game had a ton of stuff where it's just like, don't go the progression way. Every single game is like that, I'd get fed up. But like, I guess, for me, the only hard, fast rule is make sure the stuff you're getting is worth finding. Because when I play shooters, I go critical path. There's nothing worth finding.

I couldn't care less for Intel briefcases. I couldn't care less for the piece of paper with the sad war story from the family that used to live here. Except for Metroid Prime. I will scan every fucking computer. But it's a different mechanic. Yeah, I'll scan every computer and read all those facts. And one of the best parts of Last of Us was finding notes. But that was because of 39% of games.

No, most of the time. Finding notes was always perfectly internalized in that game by having a new conversation spring off of either going into the area that gets you the note or talking about the note. When you go underneath the water in the tunnels, the infested tunnels, and leave Ellie behind to go get the fucking Firefly Pendant, she goes like, you're not even leaving me here, right? Yeah. When you pick up stuff about ish in the town, like they remark on it. Every time you go into these areas or leave the character behind, a dialogue starts up and it's perfect. And even if you're by yourself when you do the Bioshock voice things, at least you can keep playing while listening to the note.

But they're garbage. The Way The Order. They're almost all trash. The Way The Disagree. The Order does it is one of the original. The original, in Bioshock 1 and 2, the ones that you'd find in detailing the world, I found them interesting. Some of them, but I think I'm just so jaded and worn out on Intel. Like, that's just paper with text.

Dude, you have to remain the fucking order. The Way The Order does it is the actual worst audio log system I've ever fucking seen. Yeah, the audio log system? Yeah, absolutely. You pick up the audio log and you can only listen to it while staring at the picture. You cannot back out. Because the audio logs are long enough that they will continue to trigger while you hit the next cutscene. So you would actually fucking have to stop playing the game.

Because cutscene triggers in that game are really, really often. And The Order has a few that are moderately worthwhile. Every time I pick one up, I would read like five lines and be like, fuck this. Well, a good example is when you go to What's His Face's Lab, what's his fucking, Nikola Tesla's Lab. And there's a piece of paper where he's written all his shit down. And if you flip the paper over, it's the ad for the brothel. Where he's known to frequent because he is a lot... He likes prostitutes.

No, because of spoilers, because he's aligned with the other guys. And like, that's actually a really good bit of... That's probably the best one in the game. Probably the best one in the game. How many emails did you read in Deus Ex? All of them. Every single one. I also read every single one, but only because I was just sitting there looking for things to do. I wouldn't have done it on my own.

Liam, that question wasn't directed at you, Liam. Why was it directed at Matt? I was only directed at Paddy. I read every single fucking email in that game. Voluntarily. They're pretty good, actually. But like, I couldn't care less. Deus Ex, they're really good, though.

If the carrot on the stick is intel on shit, I will not go for the stick. But if it's backstory that makes an upcoming moment better... One percent of games do that. Deus Ex, you and your illusion, gets a free pass because it's clearly demarcated and makes perfect sense inside the thing. I'm hacking one person's computer to read their email. Of course I would be reading it. Of course it's their email. Of course it's them angry about the red wings.

I just mean to let them shit like that. I just mean, like, in Call of Duty, when you walk into a present... It's fucking garbage. And you go into the kitchen and there's a paper on the count, like... No, it's fucking trash. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And 99% of games just fall into that audio. But yes.

I'm doing a hand gesture. I'm waving it away. Dismiss, dismiss. Some games do it right. You're absolutely correct. Like, Bioshock's are pretty good. Bioshock 1's are really good. Bioshock 2's are good.

And then Bioshock Infinite's are terrible. They get weaker as things go. Well, well, the one that in Bioshock Infinite... There's a couple in Infinite, but not many. The one in Infinite that, like, fucking... That was like, okay, this is either gonna be... They put so much of the primary plot in those fucking things. That's exactly where I was going.

Like, there's one where I'm like, this is gonna be awesome or terrible depending on how this plays out. Where you're picking up all the ones about the guy that holed himself up in the museum. And you're like, this guy sounds interesting unless this is a plot point in the game and I have to go fight him. Yeah. And he's like, yeah, no, you're learning about his backstory through these audio things, and then you go fight him and that's why you can't fuck that. That's garbage. If he was an extra detail that was about the world building, fine.

But no, that was direct plot point into this thing. No, dude, the fact that you need to find, like, three or four audio logs in Bioshock Infinite to even approach the understanding of the final scenario... The box popular in general as well. We're all through the fucking trash. You know what, one story is really good. It has nothing to do with the main plot. It's that dumb, shitty, concrete story from Wolfenstein.

Dude, that's the best example of this. It has nothing to do with the plot. You run into some guys in the prison and one of them is kind of getting like a bronchitis kind of cough. He's like, man, this fucking concrete that we're using, it's perfect for mold. Like, my apartment is fucking rife with mold. It's like, no, the concrete's perfect. And it has nothing to do with the main... And then as you go through the game, you're finding these logs about like the fucking, this fucking ghetto busted concrete

that the Germans are using to build everything because there's dirt sheets. But it is perfect for deadly mold. Someone told me that the implication is to clearly show that even after this game, how the Nazi world will crumble. Oh, totally. Like literally crumble so that the world can like get out of that phase of Nazi occupancy. Did you guys collect any of the stories in Murdered Souls Suspect? We collected a couple. We collected maybe two.

You should have done a better job writing them. Yeah. But those were halfway through. Those turned out a lot better than I expected them to be. They're still not great. They were mediocre, but still better than the main plot, so... I liked a couple of them. I liked them.

I thought they were good. I like them. I vaguely remember that. I liked the one about a woman driving away from a vagrant that would come to her car. They were interested in those. That was good. Are you afraid of the dark stories? And they were much better than the main plot, which was terrible.

Very...Irie Indiana, you might say. Yeah, a little bit of that too. Matt, who's your favorite Bond girl? Drink Moxie wants to know. Oh, Drink Moxie. My favorite Bond girl, she's, and yeah, I know, like, not Pussy Galore actually. So Elizabeth Hurley from Austin Powers. It's not.

I really enjoy Vesper from Castino Royale because that's the only Bond girl where Bond was pissed that she died and that carried over into other movies. Old dudes that are not listening to this podcast would be upset with you. No, I know, but like every other Bond girl... What do you mean it wasn't a Roger Moore Bond girl? Because none of those Bond girls are... Old guys, listen, this podcast would never go, what do you mean it wasn't a Roger Moore Bond girl?

Sean Connery. They go, how come it wasn't an Activity Dalton Bond girl? Like, fuck off. A book only Bond girl. A lot of the early Bond girls are just them, because it's the 60s, so women were not even represented. Oh my God, Matt and I were literally just talking about fucking just Bond. Guess what Sean Connery does with every woman and every bomb?

Kapow! Slaps them all the way back to the kitchen. It's absurd. It's not being hysterical with all your hysteria. Every movie, man, like every single fucking one, it's over the top. Mayday, the black lady that was a model in the 80s and she was in the Conan movie. She's really strong looking, athletic. She played Mayday who bones Christopher Walken in that movie.

That woman's awesome. Never forget Ava Onatopla. Azinia Onatopla. Azinia Onatopla. Azinia Onatopla. Azinia Onatopla. Azinia Onatopla. Azinia Onatopla.

Azinia Onatopla. And what's her name? Like Elizabeth Christmas, I believe. Oh no, Christmas Jones. Yeah. And the joke is James Bond's on top of her. The whole set up is for this one fucking punchline at the end of the movie. What joke?

The only reason this character is called this at the end of the movie. She, James Bond, says. James Bond's on top of her and he goes, that's funny. And she goes, what? He goes, I thought Christmas only came once a year. Anyway. All right. And James Bond is stupid.

Yeah. I love his movies. Yeah. We've got a clown. Well, he fucking blew up the microphone. Yeah. Now we didn't actually. We didn't think.

I know. But he's a little... A quick PSA from Dylan. He wants to let us know that... You son of a bitch. ...Archler, Pertlandi and always Sonny are back season sixes and so on or on the way. Shit, did I even fucking finish season five? So just keep that in mind.

Thanks, Dylan. I didn't know Pertlandi has a fifth season. No, I thought it was only at four. New seasons of all three of those things. Watching Brooklyn Nine-Nine and seeing Fred show up is that one weird foreign guy at the apartment with the music. I love it. I love it.

Quick question. Foley, I've been out of the Gundam game since the nineties and I was wondering, wow, what a good series, our side of the original. Gundam seed. Gundam seed. Dude, unfortunately, I've been out of the game as well. Like I watched all the... No games.

There is. It's been ongoing for a while. If you don't care about catching up with like... I got out of the red chin game. Well, it used to be just like, okay, there's the UC timeline that matters and then the shit that doesn't. And like now they've continued that stuff. If you don't give a fuck, dude, apparently Rekha Guista in G, the new Tomino series,

is pretty good. Unicorn's cool. Unicorn's there and Gundam build fighters and Thai are fun stuff and unrelated. Hey, get that out of my... Get that out of my answer. Code guess is really good too. Get that out of my answer. Did you ever watch it?

That's not related to Gundam. It's good. Get your own losers. I heard that Evangelion's pretty good. And last question is from Joseph Johnson. He wants to... Oh my God, that's so close. Is this person's name Joseph Johnson?

That's what it says here. You need to push really hard for your nickname to be JoJo Man. You need to push. But in the real life when it's not people that know JoJo, that just sounds like... Like JoJo Zavar? Yeah, and you don't want to be that. That's the second most famous JoJo. Yo, dude, they were doing a...

They did a fucking great job adapting the Darby... The Darby shit. Nice. Hey, JoJo JoJo! Oh, it's real good stuff. He wants to know what games were, if not for the art style, bland and uninteresting. Not for the art style? So the art is the saving grace?

Yeah, yeah. That was worded poorly. What games were saved by the art? What games were saved by the art? I'm going to say El Shaddai. Yeah, yeah. And that's not fair. That's the best answer.

That's a really good one. Oh God, I'm going to say Child of Light. Yeah. Yeah, sure. And to that end, like Valiant Hearts as well. Really? Yeah, I don't think so. Dude, if the art was bad, like nobody would care.

Well, because the source material is... I'm going to say the original release of DMC Devil May Cry. Uh... Uh... I'm going to... That's saved by the art? I'm going to say one art was bad. At least the level design looked cool.

Yeah. I'm going to drop one that... People are going to throw bricks at you? I'm going to throw bricks at me. Alright, everybody get their bricks. Jet Set Radio. You love Jet Set Radio! I do.

Did you try playing it recently? No. But I do remember that it was not the smoothest controlling game. It's not. It has not the smoothest controlling game. What the fuck? Yeah. It's not.

The grinding system is there. You've based your whole appearance after Jet Set Radio. It is. Awesome. It is the coolest looking thing. Sorry, this is bad. This is games that don't play well that have great art? No, these are bland games.

If the art wasn't normal, this would be like bland. It would be like... Oh. Interesting. Castlevania Lords of Shadow 2. Damn. Sure. Which has some of the most gorgeous environments I have ever seen in a video game ever and

is the worst game. But a couple of scenes. Okay. I was... Okay. J.G. But if you took that out, there would be nothing. Whatever.

J.S.R.F. Without the art style is bland. Not bland. Oh, yeah. It's bland. I fucking got one for you. I know one too. Saga Frontier 2.

That game has gorgeous watercolor art and looks astounding. And nothing else. That game is terrible. That game is fucking awful. Not saved, but we saw what it looked like before. Okami. Remember the original? I thought the original looked great.

I thought it was shit compared to the new one. I disagree with that. You're saying the watercolor doesn't look much better than the original. No. That's not what I'm saying. I'm saying that I don't think... He liked the original also. I don't think it was a saving grace.

I don't think the original was uninteresting without the watercolor. I think it was interesting without it. Really boring art-wise without it. Oh, and then an elite beat agents. Yeah. Take away the theme. Yeah, that's true, man. You end up with Osu!

That's so much the art style. The Osu! PC game. And Osu! is like... It is only as good as you're willing to throw yourself into it. Fritz on fire. No art consistency. It's just songs with generic backgrounds. You're not wrong, man.

The ultimate one, though, is El Shaddai. El Shaddai. No, no question. That would be nothing. The most visually striking game of that time blew you away. There's Satan on a fucking cell phone on a leather jacket. Super cool. You know, they made those jeans and they sold them.

Yeah, they were gonna play it and you're just like, why do I feel nothing? I don't even dislike the game. I just feel nothing. What about the order and rise? I think that the order's art style is atrocious. I don't think either is strong enough to say that they... I mean, if you take away the art, then you just end up with...

Then what is it? I don't think either of them have interesting art styles. Have I misunderstood this question? It's games that are saved by their art, right? Land are uninteresting. There's been setting and art style. Like, since they're both hyper-realistic... No, but I mean, if you take away the art and just make it white-nothing game with placeholder, everything...

Which I think both of those already... I would say, like, just like I said... I think the order and rise are the perfect example of the art-removed version of the games we're talking about right now. I disagree. Because if the art in the order had been of a much lower quality, like if it were by a B-team... No, but we're talking the art, not the visual fidelity. It's the same... it's the same general thing. What is an art director?

I think... The art is the visuals at the end of the day, right? Um... In a game, in the context of a game. I'd say no more heroes without a bold art designer. Would have definitely been more special. Oh yeah, because that game has a lot of style and it needs that style desperately. It relies on the style.

Yeah, no more heroes is a good example. Without no more heroes' style, like it'd be a mediocre slashing game. Like, we would have never even spoken about the order if not for the art quality. No, the art quality is fucking terrible in the order. The visuals are astounding. It's the same difference. The art department made that. It is the most perfectly realized, most advanced, immaculate, most boring thing I've ever seen.

But Pat, that's a style. Okay, that style is terrible. I saw the order style in Dishonored and it was more interesting there. But I've seen that art style before, Steampunk, Gothic, whatever. The visual fidelity is how well everything runs and how it looks. But it's like, am I speaking Greek? If you took away the visuals from the order, you'd have the blandest game in all. I categorized visuals into two categories.

The art direction and the quality of the elements. But when you make a game, the art is the art. And that's all the visuals entirely. I feel the same way. I think that that counts as an art style. The quality is included inherently. I look at Okami Den, which has a very poor visual fidelity because it's a DS game. It has an art style that is genuinely likeable and interesting. That gets a pass for that.

I look at Braid. Braid has a really, really good art style. But it's a 2D game that animates relatively well. It's nothing to write home about technically. Meanwhile, you've got Crisis. Crisis is the most high-end visual showpiece ever, still, fuck. But it's the most uninteresting characters. It blends with generic grunts. It has no art style to speak of other than realism.

But that is the art style. It's this bland thing. And that's what I'm saying. If you take that away and you reduce it to nothing, then you have the most boring game. Same with El Shaddai. If you get rid of the art style, you get nothing. I consider realism to not be an art style because it's what we live in. We don't live in a world like this. It's two interpretations. Hold on. You're interpreting the version of this that is bland as a version of it that's balls, right?

Just the untextured Polly's moving, doing the game. And he's thinking about EverQuest, where it's just like the most bland but still... No, I understand exactly what he's saying. Because we live in a realistic world, that doesn't count as... I wouldn't call the world realistic. I'd call it the real world. But you still see environments and people and objects and things. Sure, absolutely. Just no designs for that.

I would object to what you said, because when they sat down to make the game, they didn't start with this as a base. They started with nothing as a base. And the art style they chose was the one that they developed. Yeah, they chose the art style of cinema. But it's a realistic art style. You said they chose the art style of cinema. Yeah, which is the most boring nothing art style. But you just said it was an art style.

Sure. And it doesn't count. Now you're just like... You're moving goalposts. Fair. You're right. I am moving goalposts. But that's because I wasn't articulating. Pat, you're saying that vanilla is the same as no ice cream. Absolutely. It's not.

And it's not true. Vanilla is a flavor of ice cream. It's a bad flavor of ice cream. You just said it's a flavor of ice cream. No, it is. It's a bad flavor that shouldn't count. If you get a vanilla ice cream, throw that in the garbage. That was a good question. It was a good question.

Also, fuck this guy. I love vanilla ice cream. Okay, okay. Here's something uncontrollable. I think what Matt just said is disgusting. And I think everyone will agree with that. Imagine if there was a mayonnaise ice cream cone. Oh, that is so sick. Like throw up sick?

No, I'd love to see it. Just so I could try it and never again. I want... Last question is coming in from Michael. Has there ever been a good moment in a game you've played privately that you wish you had recorded? Every good moment ever now that I have this job now. There's two...

I forgot one, but I got one. I've told it on the podcast before, but I'll tell it again. Okay, I've got one where fighting the bird, fighting the fifth Colossus in Shadow of the Colossus is the... Oh, my God, my moment in that where it was the dramatic climb up the back and not having enough stamina to make it up to the final spot,

but letting go, tumbling through the wind, getting back just enough to grab on to the tip of the tail. Oh, the tail. The usual thing that you do on a speedrun is you go... On his turn, is you go wing to wing. Wing to wing, let go, but no. I just had the most cinematic fight there. And my first original...

If only you could have said Xbox recorded that. Yes. And my original fight with the end. Oh, that's a great one. The fucking hours. Crawling. My original fight with the end was, oh, he's there, probably shocked us.

Yeah, yeah, no, crawling hours. Because I was just immersed. It wasn't immersed, but it was about an hour for me with the end. Unbelievable. So for me, it's Shadow of the Colossus, Colossus number 11, the phalanx, that you fight in the desert, in which due to the lock-on being very exact,

and me being able to chase it, you know, he goes underneath the sand, and I was able to be directly on top of his spawn point as he came out of the sand, and Agro's body got clipped on one of his fucking wings, and dragged me all the way up into the fucking sky, and I was riding Agro around on the back of the 11th Colossus. Yes.

Until I had to jump off and stab him, at which point he took a turn, and Agro fell right the fuck off. Oh, no! And then when I hit the ground, Agro ran right up to me, and he was totally fine. You're the best! Agro's fine when he falls from heights. When I was playing through Burnout Paradise,

all the physics bugs in there were like, I'd be driving my car, and I'd hit a hill, and then I'd just be in the sky. That game had so many physics bugs. That were awesome! And they were so cool! They were so fun, but you could never replicate them. I have another one, but I don't have to record it,

because everyone else in the universe recorded it with the shitty camcorder, when they were playing Red Dead Redemption, and they ran into the bug in which the carriages would have the horse spawn one feet underground, so their hooves would get caught, and then the physics data would just bounce and bounce and bounce the carriage harder and harder and harder,

and tell if you got the two horse carriage, it would just fly up in a fucking space. So awesome! Also, hold on Matt, what's yours? Oh, sure. I had two, but the first one I think is, I think I talked about it before, but I had this bug in Assassin's Creed 1,

where I got off a horse outside one of the cities, and there was a mountain range right next to me, and I got off there, I wanted to get off on the other side of the horse, but I got off there. A bunch of soldiers just aggroed for whatever reason. They started chopping at me, but the collision of the horse somehow transferred to me,

and I was invincible, and everyone's chopping at me, blood's coming out, I'm not dying, then the horse fell through the world, and I was stuck in, like, what's his name? T-Pose? Altair. Altair?

I was stuck in the ground, and I was zooming around inside the game world, and yeah, that's why I wanted Xbox to record that. That's very similar to that amazing bug that somebody grabbed on a black flag with the fucking Infinity Boats. Oh, the boat, look at the hellboat, man! Hellboat, that's fucking sick.

And the last one was the first time I ever played Code Veronica, and I was finishing off the Arctic base, and I just wanted to get through it, so I didn't manage my, like, weapons and ammo that much, so I didn't have that much going into the Nosferatu fight. That's rough, man. I killed him with my last bullet in my mouth. In the gut!

The last physical weapon I had, aside from another. Best, that is fine. The best, that is the best. I was with a friend, and, yeah, I think we were playing the PS2 version, I think. See, that's, like, ass off the couch. Yeah.

I had two hashtag magfest moments that I would have liked recorded, where I beat... Yeah, you said this before, what is it? Where I fucking beasted a guy at Kirby Air Ride in a money match. Destroyed him. Can't believe that's a word.

Fucking trounced him. It was the best. And when I played through, it was the one where you fucking fought the Oregon's Trail. Oregon's Trail. And you beat it. Pearl, like, Baby's Trail,

I beat it on the first try. It was so, so satisfying. I wish I had video proof, instead of just my word, that I beat the invisible cleric-based at PAX. Because I know there were people that don't believe me, but I fucking totally did it.

I did it. I believe he fell through the world and died. No, he did not. I fucking reposted him. The framerate janked out, and you got him freed down. You can tell when he's going to attack you, because the lock-on cursor moves.

You picked the boss character. And then... Yeah, the cleaver. You see, what Pat's not telling you is that he pulled down the tilde menu, and then he typed in... Yeah, it was pretty cool. I saw one of them.

I wound up a can of worms on my soul. What are you guys watching? I'm going to keep watching Brooklyn Nine-Nine, and Type-Zero and Duskay come out tomorrow. A good Final Fantasy game is coming out. Are you serious? I know. It's been a hot minute, hasn't it?

Yeah. I've got it ordered, and it should be showing up tomorrow, but I think I'm going to try to buy it at midnight, and then return the Amazon copy to that one. Yeah, do that. Do that. Because I want to play that game as soon as possible,

because it came out in 2011 in Japan. It's been a hot minute, as you said. I've been really excited for this game for a long time. You helped get this done. Kind of. And I want to play through Codename Steam, hopefully I can beat that this week. It seems like there's 32 missions in the game,

and I'm already over 30% of that. What about you? For me, God, game-wise, there's another interesting game, but I don't want to talk about it, because I don't want to play it. But it's the one that we all simultaneously went, Yo, look at this thing!

Do you remember the one I'm talking about? No. You need to give us a little bit more. That happens quite often. Played, talked to you about it at the same time. Okay, well anyway. It's an interesting thing that I can't talk about, because I want to make a video,

because it looks so fucking cool. Kitten Fighter Adorable Edition? That's the one. And besides checking out Kimmy Schmidt, because that's fun and easy, all this mecha prep and stuff, has gotten me to want to just go back and check out some shit. So I started re-watching the Gundam Zeta movies,

and those are the ones that Gax brought back. Did you ever watch Codename Adorable? No, I didn't, Liam. It's pretty good. I hear that, but I'm just... Better than Alden on Zero, I realize. I guess, I guess. It's pretty good.

I found out Gennaro Bochi didn't write that show. Yeah, he only wrote the first two episodes. He wrote the first two episodes, and the rest... And he even tweeted about how he was surprised at what happened. What happened? Yeah, exactly. But yeah, some people got in touch and said, like, just to let you know,

doesn't count as a full or a butching, because he only wrote the first... He said, yeah, he said it on its path, and then they completed the or a butching without him. Yeah. He mansoned it. First two episodes were pretty good, actually. Yeah, I kept watching for a reason.

Yeah, that's true. But no, there's other stuff. But that's it. I'm going to continue playing. I'm kind of putting everything on hold until, like, I want to finish Ori and the Blind Forest, because any time I'm... I thought you finished it.

No, every time I'm, like, I wanted to... Yeah, for the amount that you talk about how much you love it and how short it is, I would have assumed you would have beaten it. But I bought a lot of stuff to edit. Oh, yeah, that's true. I'm also going to Florida. Florida. He's going to Miami.

Miami, you know, Miami. On Thursday, I may or may not be here on the podcast. I'm going to take my mic with me. But if something's happening that day, if I have to be trying on suits, because this is kind of a wedding planning thing. Please tweet every picture. Or if I'm getting chopped up and eaten by Florida men.

I was about to tell you to beware of Florida men. I might not be able to pack us. I might, depending on what I'm doing on that Monday. So I'm going to enjoy that, because I'm really excited to go. And also, Takahata's girlfriend, that really nice girl we met at Magfest. She lives like 20 minutes away from where we are. So you might go.

Oh, cool. I shared my cocaine with her. Yeah, no. It was good cocaine that night. Yeah. So we might meet up with her and do something fun. So yeah, hopefully I have a good time there. Cool.

Yeah. Don't get chopped up and eaten by Florida men. Don't let it happen. No, please, Flo Rida. Don't feed me. Flo Rida. Fat? I have something.

No? No, it's fine. Okay, fair enough. Don't worry about it. Don't worry about it. Okay. Okay. So I was telling William about it.

Just to hand off that one of the best jokes from Brickville Kimmy Schmidt is, who's that girl? Oh, what did you say I'm right here? No, it's who's that girl? I'm doing my favorite category in Jeopardy! Terrible Madonna songs. And then it goes, the question is, this 1987 one is awful. Yeah.

That question has some depth to it. That has a question. That's the truth. Before we leave, I need to... Well, what do you... What's your thing? I need to... No, what?

You said it. Oh, sorry. I was the first one out. Okay, well, yeah. No, before we leave, we have to give everyone an update to the Biker Mice slow beef scenario. Yeah, Trilogy. Yes. Loves it.

He loves it. He loves Biker Mice. Yeah, apparently so. So Death Threat is on its way. Wait, actually? Yes. He clarified that he doesn't mean any video games. He enjoys the program.

He loves Biker Mice. Someone has good taste around here, I guess. Yes. And it's everyone but Willy. I even hate Biker Mice. No, no, no. Well, he hates you worse. Biker Mice.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, Street Truck is my channel, it always was. We're rolling. We're rolling. What's happening on the site? What's happening on the site? Mecca Week is happening. Mecca Week is happening.

Mecca Week is happening. If you kids like some robots, you should check them out. Come on down to the website. We might have some. YouTube channel. Yeah. We know. We have online Miami videos that are going up when this week.

When's the next Parasite Eve? The next Parasite Eve? Well, you better move it. Half an hour from now? No, that's Mecca Week. That's Mecca Week. Mecca Week is 9 p.m. Is tomorrow, so Tuesday?

Yeah. Okay, so it's up tomorrow. All right. Okay, there you go. Yeah. Well, it is. Wherever the bump happens. Parasite Eve, River Lake, Tons 2.

Continue. Maybe a mystery box? Maybe. Maybe. Depends. And as for Mecca Week... No mystery boxes, I don't think. And every time that...

Oh, yeah, there's that other thing that we're going to do. Yeah, exactly. We have time for mystery boxes. That we have to do right away, actually. And if you are... Yeah, like you said, well, if you're putting together a list of things that need to be on Mecca Week, it's probably on there. Yeah.

It's probably on there. The list you came up with is pretty conclusive and good. Thank you. Thank you. But there's so many... Like, I was talking to playing about it, and it's like... It feels like mech games are fucking scarce until you actually have to pick... Sit down.

A number of them. You have to sit down and make the list. You go, oh, man, there's way more. I feel like it's also like wrestling games where you say, oh, man. But then, like, the list is like 130, right? There's a lot. But... You can wheel it down.

But you can whittle it down. I mean, really, 40 of them are super robot wars. It's because you're like, okay, Mecca games don't actually come out all that often here, you know, and they come out somehow often in Japan, and it doesn't seem like that often, but then you're comparing it against all games of this genre ever. Yeah. All across all of time. Yeah.

But I mean, of course, like, we're dealing with real robots here, so, you know, that's a different category. So that's a whole... You get to cut out, like, what, 60%? Well, exactly. So of those 120, you only get 50. Because you cut it down. Yeah, exactly.

And then six are Mecca salt. There he is, right? Even like... Chromehounds. Yeah. Oh, fucking Chromehounds. I forgot about Chromehounds. Yeah.

No, you don't forget about Chromehounds, man. Chromehounds had the coolest radar system ever. You had fucking guys that their job in the map was the radar. Did you like or something published that? I loved the Pops radar, which was the circle around you that had the fucking spike when activity was happening in that direction. I didn't care for it. I thought it was cool.

I didn't care for it. So please enjoy Mecca Week, always pounding ass. Yeah, that's great. All right. Google feud. Question. Why are dogs blank? So cute.

Why are dogs can't look up? Why are dogs... Loyal. Loyal. Loyal. Loyal. Number three is so loyal. Why are dogs so happy?

So happy. Why are dogs smell? Smell. Smell. Dog breath. Smell. No! Dumb.

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