Castle Super Beast - SBFC 087: "I'D RATHER HAVE NOTHING."

Episode Date: April 7, 2015

#WonderRed4Smash #UniteVOTE #Diplomacy

Music Hashtag new Hashtag wonder red for smash Hashtag Hashtag grease Unite vote Hashtag Groose is loose

Sure We're not voting for Groose Sure No, no, no, no, here's what you do Good job You type it up Long horse You type it up, you put in the big description of why Groose should be in the game, and you

make it hilarious. You take a print screen of that, you post it, everybody yucks it up and laughs. Let everyone know You get a huge boost, and then you delete all that shit, and you cast your real vote. Where it matters on something that can actually get in. So, uh, Liam? No, it's less likely to get in. Liam's actually not true, but I'll let you see that.

You guys have been pushing forward wonder red for smash, uh, hard on Twitter. Aggressively. Not just punch. The Zybatsu has been pushing. I have decided to stay out of it up until now, because basically I was lazy, and I was like, I'm gonna see how this plays out, and that of course, pushing his joke vote. Get the joke character in, because it's the one time you can force a company to put it on code.

Yeah, well, people are already trying to get a joke character in, and he's named King K. Rool. And you hate cooperation, so you're not gonna join us, so where's your, where are you gonna join us? Uh, everybody, come on, let's be real, wonder red needs to be in smash. Oh, thank you the best. Or Bruce. No, seriously.

So, Matt, actually, in case you actually don't know, uh, King K. Rool and wonder red are like, really at odds with each other. Well, funny you should see that. Obviously, you go for wonder red over King K. Rool, because... Because he's a real character from a good game, unlike King K. Rool. I'm honestly... I don't have anything against Donkey Kong Country, but I'm honestly like, I don't actually get the love of Donkey Kong Country.

You know what? You know what? That's exactly where I'm at. I have nothing against Donkey Kong Country, but King K. Rool is like a fucking dumb alligator with the... Someone just sent this screenshot of the... Oh, I've seen that. ...of the purchase balance.

Look at this screenshot. Do you know why? Because he's one of the few villains. There's, there's him, and then there's Star Wolf, and that's it. All the rest are heroes almost. Yeah. Well, there's Ridley. There's some good ideas.

Yeah, but he's, he can't be in it. It's too big. Let's, let's just... I love Ridley, but not for the outrageousness of the fact that King K. Rool eliminated... Is that Gino number one? That's Gino number one. Gino was the first elimination by King K. Rool. Then Beyo.

Yeah. Then, scroll down. But it was really... Then Legi Kong. Which is a then another... How did, how did Legi Kong beat anyone? Legi Kong beat Ridley in first round. And then...

And then... And then Bandana B. Yeah. Right? And then all the way up. I'm telling you, it's just because he's... And like Wonder Red beat Star Wolf, who has already been in a smash. In a smash.

I know, but that shows you how far smash people go. So here's the thing about this, this, this board. The left side of the board is a way more competitive side than the right side of the board. Yeah. For sure. On the left side of the board, I see Snake, Banjo, Kazooie, Wonder Red. The Splatoon... The Inkling from Splatoon.

The Inkling from Splatoon. Bomberman. Bomberman. Professor Layton. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like the left side of the board is... Rayman. Who's the character that beat Inkling?

Who's the blonde girl thing? That's Isaac from Golden Sun. The Golden Sun, yeah. Wow. Yeah. So I like the fact that Quote got as much props as he did. Quote getting in there is pretty cool too. I don't get it.

I have like nowhere near that affinity for Quote. I've been in Quote three times. I would rather the chorus men had won in the first round. I'd rather cooking mama. Chorus men who were supposed to be in the game. But it's like Cheeby Robo and stuff. Yeah, of course. Paper Mario is like, what the fuck, man?

Yeah, that's cool. Come on. Come on. I'm glad King K will be there. Now, guys, we all know who's going to take number one and number two in this vote. It's going to be Goku and Superman. Of course. Of course.

Naturally. Can you imagine if the people responsible for this don't know that that's going to happen and they get the results back and they're all excited. Number one, Goku. Number two, Superman. Number three, whoever that guy is from reach. Zane from One Direction. Like Sakurai sacrifices his life to cancel the Goku vote.

Page one is nothing but that. Okay, page two. And page two is nothing but that. Page one is nothing but Goku and Goku misspellings. That's all it comes down to. Namja lying down dead on the floor. Yeah. That's number five.

That's awesome. But you know, ultimately I think it's pointless. It's just going to be whatever Sakurai wants. Well, I bet you they're just going to ignore it somehow. No, but it's going to be curbed by like massive opinion though. I think it's going to be, because it seems like it's going to be multiple characters and not just one based on some of the terminology. Well, some of the stuff they said seemed to point that way.

I think they're going to look at who's popular plus who they think is viable. And who they can get. Yeah, sure. If they're in, like, Bayo's a little weird. Wonder Red's a little. But like, obviously if like, Colin from Advance Wars gets first place, I don't think they're going to even think about putting Colin in. They're going to ignore it.

Like, I think it's got to be someone who's popular and somewhat viable. It's got to be on the table. So characters like Wonder Red and King K. Rool like these guys. And that's what reinforces my pick for Wonder Red over like... It's a trifecta of a couple of other things. It's one, will they make a good character? Two, did they get high in the votes? And three, how much weird, extra non-gain development work do we have

to actually put this character in? Like Snake, probably going to be very popular. I don't think Snake should be in there. It might be more difficult than not difficult at all to get him in, whereas they own Wonder Red. Well, remember, this is not a vote of which is the best character or who is your favorite. Who should be in Smash?

That's what people are treating as. Okay, Matt. This is the unofficial sanctioned Game Facts character. Let's say you actually click the vote button on the Groose thing. Give me his B attacks right now. All four of them. Give you his B attacks. Go.

All right, four B is the Grooseinator like Kenny. He just takes a little candy. That's Rock Solid. That's Rock Solid. That's a give me. I'll give me his hair turns into Propeller. Okay. All right.

That's not a move he ever does, but okay. There's a lot of characters. No, I'm buying it. I'm buying it. There's a lot of characters that do moves that they never actually have. Does it hit you or is it just a lift? Just a lift. Just a lift.

Okay. Down B is he falls in love with you. He hurts other characters that are on the screen who are falling in love with a character he's falling in love with. Make that make sense. Make that make sense in a video. All right. Well, that's his final plan.

That's his final plan. His neutral B is him saying I'm Groose. So that's how we work this out. Right? His neutral B should be him playing a note on a horn, by the way. But let's just ignore that. He should be a jiggly puff variant. Can you do any Wonder Red smashes that are Bs that are not just the fist?

Yeah, you do. The sword, the gun. Any of the other Wonder Guys. That means that's on that. How does that make sense? No, but honestly. Then he has to work like on all of them. I think that's what's so interesting about the Wonder Red is he could...

He could work either just as Wonder Red or with his team. You can have the team or you can have the ones who can make it interesting. That is so much work. They'll never do it. No, no, that's not what I'm saying. Sorry, I'm not saying... You're talking about Smash Brothers. Sorry, man.

I'm not saying... I just said that you want a character. No, no, I didn't say that. You misunderstood me. You said it. I'm not saying they'll make a character who can use both styles. I'm saying he could be either. He can be the Wonder Red has so many moves to choose from.

Like that, like it could be anything. Instead of scraping the barrel, you'd be overwhelmed with choice on each button. He can be... He can be... His fucking down A can be a spike that's a wonder... Fucking Unite Tombstone. All the moves are there exactly as... And fuck it, you can make him really small on the screen or have it be the character,

be the wonderful 101. And not wonder... I don't think they can really small on all of ours. Three inches tall. And you already know what... You already know what the final smash is. It's like 30 words long. And it's going in there.

And it's going to be in Smash with your help. That's correct. So keep those hashtags flying. Wonder Red is not only one of the... Wonderly and often. Wonder Red is not only one of the best characters that you could see. It's not only one of the ones that we want to see the most. They own that character.

It's the easiest to get. I think he would make a great character. But even after all of that, Wonder Red is a character that we thought was going to be in Smash due to that screenshot. Anyway. And it is a huge disappointment that he is not. I just kind of find the president's set of Lucas and Mewtwo that they're clearly going a lazy route and they're just going to do the laziest thing possible.

For those characters, sure. No, but even for a fan vote thing, I just... I'm being negative about this. I just have a feeling. But remember that they propose the vote to begin with. It exists. You know what I mean? So we'll see.

You know what? I don't think there's a question that they're going to put Wolfen next. I don't have a question at all. And I'm excited for that to happen. Because I want them to just keep putting content in this game. Like Lucas and Mewtwo. It's like the characters from Crosstek that got dumped back into form. Yeah.

Here's the thing. I'm just setting myself up for disappointment so I can be... This is the pat thing usually. Just setting myself for disappointment so I can be surprised. In this case, Wonder Red is so much of an obvious lock that I can't even lower my expectation. I would be genuinely shocked if Wonder Red did not get in regardless of his voting stance.

You should still vote for him. It's very emboldening to see that he's so popular in many different areas. If only all those people voting would have bought the game. You know who the character should be? It should be just a wet girl from Fatal Frame 5 with the camera obscura. So, um, fucking Ran Hibiki from Rival Schools absolutely does camera fighting and it works.

But no, the only other thing to address there is the characters that everyone thinks we would be pushing but we just happen to not be. Like for example, the badge. It's a throwaway vote. The badge is a throwaway vote. Shovel Knight is a throwaway vote. I think Shovel Knight is really cool.

And I really love that idea. But not as much as Wonder Red. Can I talk about that for just a second? Voting for Baz is like voting for your cousin in the mayoral election. You want him to win, but are you fucking kidding me? People will vote for you. When I see people voting for Shantae and Baz and stuff, it's like those are neat.

But without even saying anything, without anybody talking, Snake will win over both of them any day of the week. Without even saying a word, Wolf will beat them all. Like there are so many characters who will overwhelm those characters. Shovel Knight has a lot of push, but still. Hey, you guys want to figure out how this thing goes? Hazard Wolf would land above Shovel Knight at the end of the day.

And then the other one, the big one. Remember, Shovel Knight is not out in Japan. Also, let's remember, on L Block won that character battle that one time. If we're going by game facts rules. Well, I feel like the best source of data on being able to see this character battle is go back and look at the old game facts character battle. But that's why I'm trying to think- The loud should win all the time.

And L Block, right? And that's why I'm trying to say that it's not a popularity thing. It's like what fits. Yeah, but the reality of the voting is- And that's why when it really gets down to the inches, the inches, Bayonetta is an awesome idea. But it's not as appropriate for that game. I don't exactly find so.

She said it right next to Wonder Red. I don't necessarily agree because a lot of Zero Suit Samus' modeling and moves. I can see translated it. Remember when Matt starts talking about Lucas and you two as lazy design? You could bullshit a clone out of Zero Suit Samus into Bayonetta. Absolutely. Pretty easy. I don't know.

It made no mistake. It could be done with no problems. If it turns out it's not Wonder Red and it just turns out to be Bayonetta, would you be disappointed? No. I would be secretly thrilled because that's the character that I want actually more than Wonder Red to get in. But I don't think it's as realistic as it gets.

If Bayonetta actually landed that instead, I'd be super hyped. I'm going to be bummed if Wonder Red doesn't get in no matter how you slice it. But I just want them to keep putting content in. What if you got in and all you said was this is not as good as Melee? That's all your B attacks. I'd be upset. I can say it up. I can say it down.

I can say it side to side. Did you ever do that? Oh my God. Someone do that. Someone modeling it to smash. And let's not forget that this also de facto means they're getting an amiibo. Whoever gets in gets an amiibo. Wonder Red needs an amiibo.

Wonder Red deserves an amiibo. I can't wait for it to go in my Wonder Red amiibo spot. Because it appears that amiibos have to be viable for more than one game. That appears to be the thing. It appears to be the case. So that means Wonder Red will at least appear in two games. Three games. Total ever.

I was going to say there are still characters who haven't gotten to yet. Maybe there'll be me masks that you'll be able to wear in some way. Well, that's one thing. I mentioned it to you on the night we watched the Nintendo Direct. I bet you a lot of the characters who are really popular, but don't make it in. We'll get me costumes at very, very late. I like to see that. Well, they already started rolling them out, right?

Yeah. Hey, welcome to episode 87 of the Friendcast. Nice to get all that Smash talk. Is this one titled with a hashtag? Oh God. Maybe. Maybe. We'll have to see where this goes.

Just fucking call it like hashtag Wonder Red for Smash. Just end it there. That's easy. Unless something better arrives, we'll see. We'll put it on the front page of iTunes. What have you guys been doing this week? What do you do? What do you do?

What do you do? I went up north to see my family because it was Easter. I noticed that you do that a lot. It's almost like you love your family. It's almost like I love my family. And the north. Yeah, exactly. But you know, you say I do that a lot, but it's like, I was thinking about it.

I'll be lucky to go to their place like 10 times a year. I don't get to see them as often as I do. Yeah, I see my parents every week. It's just like when it happens, you tell us about it. Because it's the big deal. Yeah. Nobody caught that. I had a super fun time.

Can't react to something nobody caught. Nope. Not at all. I said he's a good son and went, bam. And I did a fist cocking motion. Fist cocking. Yeah. I had a really good time, but not much outside of Easter festivities.

I played Boxboy a lot. You know that, uh, how, how lab game that came out on the 3DSE shop. Okay. The puzzle game where you make. You're a Tetris piece. Pop out of yourself. Yes. Sort of.

Um, so. The not tetropolis game. From, from the opening until the level before the credits, it's basically a tutorial. And then the last world is fun, good stuff. And then after the credits, there's a couple more worlds of fun, good stuff. Like boy, is it tutorial time for the whole game. It's, it's kind of a bummer. It's a decent puzzle game, but you call it the final fantasy 13 of puzzle games.

Uh, maybe. Is it because it keeps introducing new mechanics or because it doesn't want to go here? It keeps introducing new mechanics, but it doesn't mix them up until the very end. Oh, no, that's the hallmark of a good puzzle game. And like I'm talking, you go through like 14 worlds or something of tutorial, which is like seven levels per world. Wow. And then you get to the last world, which finally starts really mashing them together.

And only after the credits do you get like. That's a total bummer. I remember portal was probably the first example of this ever. It's like they would teach you a new concept. Next room is every concept so far in the entire game. Yeah. Here's, here's the new concept for this room also. Exactly.

Or, or like solve this concept before we introduce it to you. Then we explain it after you've already done it. And you go, ah, yeah, like Pushmo a little bit. Yeah. So I, I, I think this is probably just as good as Pushmo because like Pushmo is just kind of like, you figure it out and you're like, okay, I get it. Wait, there's 200 more levels. I love Pushmo.

Pushmo is pretty good. This guy should be in Smash. Um, I think, I think this one's just as good as that. So you've already played Pushmo. You'll enjoy it. Okay. Like it's not the best or anything. Those B attacks are pretty limited though, Matt.

Oh, Paul. Crash. Did you play Crashmo? Crashmo I didn't play Crashmo. Okay. His only B attack is pushing, but it's super OP. Find children where they shouldn't be. Yeah.

As somebody who has not played Pushmo, I'm super confused. That's literally what the crux of the game is. Okay. Fine. Whatever. Are you pushing children into the void? Pushy Pushmo. That's something weird in your couch.

Oh, look, it's five children. Level clear. That's a lot like Michael Jackson's main locker. Yeah. Oh, um, I played Bloodborne a ton. Bloodborne's good. I didn't get to play it for most of the week, so I was gone for four sevenths of the week, but I'm saved right in front of the last boss who I fought a couple of times.

You're such a weirdo. What? What? You're a weirdo. The denominator in that is a prime number. It can't be fucking subdivided into a smaller fraction. That's as low as you want me to say. Half the week.

He wants you to say half the week. It was more than half the week. I like it though. Four sevenths of the week for seven days. I don't agree with them. I agree with you, but that's what he wanted you to say. You can put style into that. Put accuracy and precision.

You can put style. I'll put concentration. Exactly. But we'll get there in a minute. We'll get there in a minute. Wally, what happened in your week? Um, I had quite a few things going down this week. Dumping hours into front mission and like...

Yeah. That's what you meant by concentration. This is a bathroom a lot. No. Like the hours I put into front mission are directly proportional to how much I love it. Like... What are we talking here? One week equals...

Four sevenths of the week, you might say. You played it? That's inhuman. That's absurd. No, no, no, no. No, no, no. I'm still, I'm still like beginning stages of the game. But just getting into the customization and...

It's porn. It's fucking porn. Oh. It's the most like accessible in depth. Yeah. Met customization ever. You can get more in depth with like Armored Core and that nonsense. But...

But that's not accessible. You can't, you can't actually get into it. Yeah. But front mission is the fucking perfect balance. And you've got... It's so unbelievable. So I just started getting like, I got my shields on with the guys and I'm doing that. Mixing up shields with foraging...

If, if... Shit. This is a piece of advice and I don't care if this goes into the path of cheater vault or whatever. But front mission three is a game you should play with one FAQ open on Game Facts. And that FAQ is the one that tells you what parts give you what skills. Because other than that, there is no way you're... No. Because you can equip a part and it gives you shield bash.

But if you use a gun at three squares away. Yeah. That skill will never show up. Okay. Well, so far I feel like the skills I've been procking, especially on like with your buddy Rio Go. Like he's been doing zoom one, zoom one, zoom one and shit like that. Yeah. Like constantly it's OP.

Yeah. So I'm like, I don't, I don't think I need it. Yeah. You know what? You're fine. I'm fine. All, all you need to know is that the Lenghi, Lenghi three left arm is the best arm in the game.

Because it gives you, or is it Lenghi? It's just Lenghi. Sure. Gives you shield bash three on your melee attacks. Now what? That's the strongest melee move in the entire game. Do you still have Pats Vita? I have my own.

He has his own. In the form of a place to head to. He gave me back my data. Oh no. I mean a portable one. So I was going to say, you know, you could like bring it with that anywhere in the world. No, no, no, no, no. I'm actually, no, my portable choice at the moment is this, sir.

Is the Majora's Mask. Which I finally sat down and got set up. Which you can see here. I've started this. This is playing Persona Q. Persona Q. I'm in the, in the starting stages of that. How's the story?

Well, here's the thing. I'm, I'm, I'm barely past the intro. I just, I just booted it. Because most of my time was spent transferring my shit to the fucking things. Isn't that super cool? Oh my God, dude. We all talked about this a while ago, but you hadn't done it yet. No, no, no, no.

You know that night when I pissed you off? Cause I was texting you super late about how long it was taking me to copy? You weren't pissing me off. You misunderstood. You misread the tone. I was not pissed off. I was just like, I was not pissed off at you. I was just like fucking, like every time you would text me going, it's been five hours

since I started the transfer. Fucking Nintendo. It was double entertaining for me. It took me like two, like an hour and a half. He did the full transfer. It leaned to the full fucking wireless transfer. In my case, I, thanks to that NeoGaff guy, cut my time down by going out and getting the microSD in advance.

That's what I did. I did the prep transfer. I did that also. And you keep it sane. But the time was still like an hour and a half. And it was super confusing with the screwdriver and the changing of the thing. And you have to turn it off before it tells you to turn it off? Exactly.

What the fuck is that? And I had the hilarity of doing this while my girlfriend was here watching it go down. Oh yeah. Just sitting there wide eyed going. But now she can see what a man you are. Sure. But she's looking at it like, why would they do that? Why?

Like such an innocent, I don't understand. So guys can impress their girlfriends in the technological know-how. And it was like, why do you waste your time on this bullshit? And the thing is, I had logged in on the PSTV at her place on that and just signed into my name and account. That was really hard wasn't it? Wait, isn't that how it works on all of these? Yes, all of them, but this one.

So just confused face as that whole process went down. But whatever. I can't do this process again. And I'm glad that they announced all that fucking account shit because I'm done with this fucking thing again. It's so out of control. We all breathe a sigh of relief for you. But it sucked man.

It sucked. It's just that mine was like so painless. I know, but the rest, but I feel like the rest of us needed like that. You said it was painless, you also just said it still took you an hour and a half. Yeah. Like, you know how long it took me on when I got my PS4 back from repair? Like 18 seconds. All I had to do was punch in my password.

We're not going to be positive about it when it's anything more than sign into your name and password. It's just that if I'm complaining about it now, kind of pointless. Dude, they had how many years? Almost 10 years. I don't know man. Of course, but... It's a bad decision.

The fact where the complaining comes from, the source of the repeat complaining is the fact that the incredulity hasn't left. Like it's not anger at the process. It's not frustration at the process. It's astonishment that the process exists. And that will never go away. And because like as we get a month away from it, right, it's like it's dissipated a little, but you're now further in time.

So it goes back up again that that process still exists as it is now. I don't know about it going back up. Well, I just mean it stays relatively even. It's a good thing that Snake Eater theme was there to calm me down. There you go. But in starting Persona Q, the only thing I can say about it so far is... Yeah, it loves me. It's fucking weird that when you name your main characters, there aren't enough spaces

for you to name them you or Minato Arisato or you Narokami. Narokami? You mean the first name and the last name? Yeah, that has been a problem in some Atlas games. Not very many, but in which like you can't go over seven letters, which is way too short. So people are going to yell at me that it's not in my Minato Arisato anymore, and that's fine. I just like that anyway, so blah. But you Narokami is the super canon name, and Narokami doesn't fit.

And it's like why? So now it's just your name. No, no. And I was like, I'll just call him you with no last name. I was like, no, you got to put a last name. So he's now you Narukai. You Narukai. Nice.

But it's an alternate dimension. Ah, this is like ah. Okay. Well, when I write it, you start the actual game. Q takes place in an alternate timeline anyway. So, but I'm playing it just like all of us. I'm playing it despite the patch. So fuck you.

I'm going to figure out for myself. What a great reason to play a game. That's a good reason. I also care. And it's a little. Hating me is a great reason to do things. Like, I'm going to eat a jar mayonnaise because that's stupid. In front of you.

I did that. And it's nice. And it's also that like, hey, check out all this stuff and all these characters that were not on your platform. Prior to this, right? That's always that weirdness. It's somewhat odd that the fanboy game, like the fan service game, came out on a platform that none of those games came out on. It was weird, yeah. But, yeah.

It ended up like doing fine, but like it was only because the Etrian Odyssey guys were very familiar with that. What is this? Is this a Kingdom Hearts game? Because this feels like a Kingdom Hearts way of doing things. Yeah. If it was by anyone else, it wouldn't have been, but the Etrian Odyssey guys. Motor Report, once I get in. Did go through and beat Life is Strange 2.

And you guys don't have to comment on that because you. We'll say right now, that middle section. Okay. And comment. As fucking rough. More than the middle section. I'm going to straight up say Life is Strange 2 fucking sucked. It dropped the ball super hard.

I know why, because we didn't save someone at the end. No, I totally did, actually. Okay, well there you go. But more importantly. Because we thought that last section was good. Irregular Bottle Hunter X. Can I? That's the middle section.

That's the middle section. Did it take you so long that that became the middle and the end section? Oh my God. This game, dude. I've never seen a fucking thing. Like, you know how Walking Dead Season 1. We're talking Pixel Hunt here. We're talking Walking Dead Season 1.

Pixel Hunt. Was fine. And then Walking Dead Season 2 was like, uh. And then that third chapter was particularly fucking garbage. Yeah. It was straight from chapter like 3 of Walking Dead. In the midst of its good stuff, right into the garbage. I just pretended they were Triforce Shards and what's-her-face-was-tingle.

I enjoyed it. No, no. That's different. This Walking Dead's problem was its storytelling and its dialogue. Whereas, like, Life is Strange Episode 2 was like its gameplay of that middle section. But no, because the dialogue. That's fucking his finger. Oh, the dialogue is always that great.

It's hella good. I just want to call on the analogy of pretending something is Triforce Shards and the person is tingle is what made him enjoy it. I think that is the most baffling reverse analogy ever. No, I get it. Because Triforce Shards are the reason why I never beat Wind Waker. Okay. And you never saw the coolest get-and-defeat ever. Oh, I saw it.

My girlfriend at the time beat it. Well. What a hero she is. Yeah. But anyway, that fifth bottle is located in a place where the collision of the game dictates you should not go. Uh. There's a- Be fair, Liam found all the bottles quite quickly.

Hey, Liam. They're really used to test video games for a living. He knows how collision works. Okay. Well, exterior collisions in particular. I don't want to go here right now. I have no reason to be- Dude, we had no problem with that.

No, that- That was great. Because- Liam and Matt better bug testers than what we can- There's a space. There's a space where not according to the positions we ended up in, but moving along. Uh, there's a space where- They just didn't like us because we're white.

Yeah. Yeah. Want to get that token higher. Yeah. He really did though. Exactly. Exactly. The jump popped into my head and I'm like,

now I'll take the high ground here. And then Liam just- One second low ground. No, because you always tell everyone to go on the high roads. I'm going to- I'm going to- Liam and Matt know who his boss was. So-

Liam Sendo smashed it, like, sneeze on the ground into one of them. But no- And all you're saying is the middle section. No, no, no. Because- The last thing I want to say about that part is- The bottle deal, yeah.

It was the hardest to find bottle was in between a space where other spaces of that equal size didn't allow you to go through that part. Yeah, yeah. And then- Did you have to use your time powers to get out of that space? Is that the space you're talking about? Yes, yeah. Yes, that's always the roughest part.

Horse shit spot, right? Yeah. So there's that shit. They took us one part. Then there's the part where- But it was dumb, dude. It was dumb. I didn't think it was that dumb.

And then you had the fact that you're like, let's do all this dangerous activity with our friend. And then- Yes. Not use the fact that we have used our time powers to see how dangerous it can get. Yeah. To convince her. Totally agree.

That it's a bad idea. Totally agree. And then you continue to use that mentality of like, I can see the future. I know what's going to happen. And I know why it's bad. We lost it. You need to stop yelling at me and telling me that what I did was bad.

The most- When you know that I can see the future, asshole. That's fine. Compared to the most egregious thing where Liam took- Liam was, the word I'd say is livid to this decision where, I'll just say it, Chloe goes, we gotta get going. And then your phone rings.

Oh my God. God forbid. God forbid you fucking answer the phone. I went over to Matt's place to record and he just started yelling at me about this part. We got- Hey. Don't go save those burning puppies in that building. You better fuck-

We got bottles to stack. God forbid you answer your phone while some shit's going down. And I'll hate you forever. And that represents why I hated this chapter. Because that- Because it's too real. That phone thing became the whole chapter, especially at the end. Almost, almost.

And every time it escalates, it does- With a linchpin decision. The Walking Dead game formula requires you to always feel bad no matter which choice you make. Would you say that the- How dare you have the audacity to answer your phone is the salt lick moment? Yeah. It kind of almost is. It's the moment that can-

It's the moment that you turn and you can never be brought back. And it's amazing because like, you know, playing with your girlfriend, we both watch and we're like, wow. So any like wooly attraction to that style of character? Yeah. Which is punk hair, short- It's gone now. Totally nice stuff. Fuck her.

That shit is dry. Done. Done, right? And then you have- Natural accompanying bullshit. And the game- Surface. The game just starts throwing all this like, you made the wrong decision, you made the wrong decision shit at you.

Yeah. In the most unbelievable, just ridiculous ways. Here's why the game is still good though. They're like, like overall good. The chapter's still not my favorite. Because there's three episodes. There's three episodes. But there's one thing where me and Liam, when we recorded it, were asking a character,

a character asked us, should I do this or should I do this? And you tell them either or. And since the rewind feature is there, you tell them one, they don't like it. Yeah. They go, I don't like that, but fuck you, I guess. And then I go, if this is walking dead, let's say you can rewind walking dead. If you then tell the character the other thing, they'll go, I don't like that either. But when you rewind in this game and you tell this character, I think we should do that.

She likes it. But then it ends up being bad later on for you. It depends. It depends. You can still get out of it. In a couple of them, that's yes. But I like that characters' mindsets do not change. As somebody on the total outside of life is strange, and all I know is that it's a bunch of high school kids,

and one of them has time, your main character has time powers. Yes. There's a bunch of high school drama bullshit. Yes. I am, and other characters know that you have time powers also. But I am baffled that there is any possible conflict in this game at all. The idea that having the ability to not only see the future, but go back in time and change events,

and have a scenario that there are any consequences. Exactly. And your characters... You don't have limitless use of it. Yeah, you don't have limitless use of it. Like plot reasons and gameplay. But your characters' inability to explain the obvious solutions because she has time powers is ridiculous.

The combination of these two factors is like, what if D.O. had the DeLorean? It's the most overpowered conceivable thing they ever had. And then the only other thing I'm going to go on is just the fact that you have that final big dramatic moment in the chapter, where it's supposed to be emotional, but you can practically hear the Dreamcast disc spin noise as the characters loading up decisions you've made to use against you. But notice that it didn't stutter to shit.

It didn't stutter. There was that moment in the final Walking Dead season where you're talking to the guy that you could actually see him stutter as he would load in. You know how it's like, you're bad for Clementine for these reasons and I'm going to load up your game history? It had one of those things. It is because you were bad for Clementine because you did this. I'm silently judging you because you had any.

Yeah, exactly. Me and Matt didn't get nothing. And all the fucking tension is just removed and gone because of that video gaming of that part. But still, it was a lot better than the final of Walking Dead season one where that all loads in. It was much more seamless. And like Liam said, Liam just played it the way he thought

and he just aced that whole thing. No, absolutely. And say here, we didn't get any bad ends there either, but it was just stupid. I'm not sure when you played it, but when you played it, that was stacked heavily and people failing it. The statistics at the end, like 87% of people failed it. Some failed percentage.

It was much closer to 50-50 on my stats on Steam. But yeah, no, that's it. And it was just blah compared to the first one. We'll see where it goes. We can't talk about it, but episode five is going up tomorrow at nine. No, today. Tuesday. Today is Tuesday.

Today is Tuesday when the podcast releases. It's probably Monday. I trust Roli to have this up on Monday night. Yeah, no, that's not the thing. Are you awake at three in the morning when the podcast is? But yeah, Tuesday evening. Sometimes it's earlier, but you know. Tuesday noon.

As a letdown, it kind of was that, especially middle portion. I'm still passionately care about certain characters. And Liam has his biker mice, John Leguizamo, and his bless now. Sure. It's up to you to figure out which character he loves. I'm going to think about that. He's looking in our window at the beginning of the episode. Stop it.

Okay, okay. And just in terms of some cool stuff that I was watching, I finished off Gundam Build Fighters. It was excellent. If you want to see cool robot fights without the space politics, go for it. Really good. Space politics is the best.

I'm not going to start trying. I'm not going to start trying right away, because there's some other shit I want to watch. Try. Like Kids on the Slope. I don't know. Yeah, I know. You caught that.

But like... Is that like Kids in the Hole? No. No. No. This is something that I got bumped in my direction. And I saw Yoko Kano Shinichiro Watanabe in... Click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click.

That is Cowboy Bebop Music Outdoor Act. Yeah, I know. I'm just checking. I'm aware. Fucking... I'm in. It's Slice of Life. It's normal.

It's about music. And I'm enjoying it so far. It's about music? Well, that was a good choice of staff. Right? Fucking right? Yeah. It's very normal, very slice of life.

And it involves a lot of like blues history and jazz history and stuff like that. But it's really enjoyable so far. And yeah, House of Cards Season 3 is Godlike. The end. That's it. They upped that for a season 4 too, I'm not sure you saw. Oh yeah? They renewed it.

Wait, no, no, no, that's stupid. That makes no sense. Yeah, well, they did it. Because it's a British remake. It's a remake of a British show that... And it was like, bye, season 3. And season 3, season 3. Wow, three upped.

Oh god. It comes to Shark. Kevin Spacey. Wooly, wooly, wooly. I have faith. The office, dude. But that was a cold other direction. And so far, it's been dead accurate.

Well, yeah, it'll be dead accurate. Until the thing doesn't happen. Yeah. But Kevin Spacey, I have faith in you. Please, don't fuck that up. He becomes the Hulk. Man. That's not...

What? His enters... His enters the lobby. Are you thinking of Edward Garner? No, I actually thought of going on the direction. Eric Benna? Or he becomes like Eric Fabian, or whatever that guy's name is, and the negotiator. But I decided to just say fuck it and go with the Hulk.

Why do we still like him? I think you just fucked up. What did you do with him? I think you just fucked up. Like, we're all looking at him listening to this drivel when Matt, you should be telling us about your movie. Hey, hold on. The negotiator?

Great movie. You're not even wrong. That part where San Jackson pretends to shoot that guy? Please. I had an up and down week. My dad's unfortunately in and out of the hospital. He's getting bionic hips put in, and it's kind of rough here and there, but hopefully, I don't know.

You made it sound cool. Yeah, but it's like, did it take? We were talking about, like, a game earlier about bionics and shit, so it's kind of up and down, but I didn't really have a lot of time there for it to play video games, but I didn't have time to watch a couple of things. If any of you saw my Twitter over the weekend, I had some things to say about a couple of movies, but, like, right off the bat, we watched a Netflix movie called that played at Fantasia called Open Windows.

It has Elijah Wood, and Elijah Wood's confidant, Sasha Gray. Wait, what? Yeah. The most gimmicky thing with the entire movie is Elijah Wood staring at his computer screen, and every cut viewpoint is in windows on his computer. That was the best time. So when he's in a hotel. Because it's an all open window.

Open window. What? So I can hack in. Oh, I remember the trailer for this effect. It's terrible. Yeah. So, like, he hacks into Sasha Gray's phone, and you can see her phone's view on her. Can I point, can I ask a, should be obvious question, but I'm dumb.

Is it, is he hacking into Sasha Gray's phone or Sasha Gray's character's phone? Yeah, Sasha Gray's character's phone. Thank you. Okay. It would be a lot more interesting if he was hacking into Sasha Gray's phone, I imagine. Different movie. It was absolutely awful. It's the most gimmicky thing ever.

In, like, I saw a movie not too long ago at Fantasia Film Festival that was, like, through Skype. It was a horror movie through Skype. A horror movie through Skype. And it was awesome. It was effective. But this is, like, the entire movie is literally staring at a desktop with different windows opening up in different, like, wave forms, people talking.

And I, I honestly, like, stopped caring. But- Your narrative for that, like, that can be interesting for a short film. Yeah, it was a feature film. It makes me think of that movie about the cyber zombies. You remember the ones- You need to be more specific, because that actually covers a shockingly broad amount of film.

At some point that girl prints off a bunch of paper and lines it up and there's a zombie face or some shit. And it's all spooky shit, all digital. Superhuman Samurai Cyber Squad. Wait, are you talking about, like, Buffy Episode 3 where he fights a cyber demon in Superhuman Samurai Cyber Squad? No, much more recent. It's all, like, tremors or some shit.

Is it digital domain? Uh, leaping awful. By the way, that reboot comic is not canon. Leaping awful. Are you okay? Yeah. What was that work you- People, people contacted me to tell you, to tell you that that reboot comic is not canon

and your life is still meaningless. Okay. Leaping awful Elijah Wood, it was still better than the Hobbit, the Battle of the Five blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blahs. I really like what you had to say about this one. Yeah, that's not really Elijah Wood. I can't- For me now, Leaping awful Elijah Wood.

For me- He did appear in the start of the Hobbit trilogy. Yeah. For me, Elijah Wood is now Kevin, first and foremost. Sure. That's fine. From Sin City. And then second, he's the guy from The Dog Show.

He's also the good guy from The Good Son of Macaulay Culkin, where he's evil. Yeah, anyway. Yeah. Ha ha ha ha ha ha. Other three I would describe as soulless. It is- It is one of the most boringness in stings. Oh, so you went to watch it?

We just sat down and watched it. You know what, that is your fault for not watching the Tolkien Edit? I, I, I, when I was watching it, I was like, I should watch the Tolkien Edit. Because I've got it. Yeah. If you watch it. I'm kinda interested. I'm kinda interested.

No, that's bullshit. It's your fault for watching the theatrical cut of a movie. That you knew was shit. Yeah. But I wanted to see, I'm like, oh, I, I just thought I gotta finish this song. Yeah, yeah. The movie's still bad. The movie's still bad.

But, I mean, do you remember when no one read the Hobbit? And then, do you remember the part where Elrond and Saruman and Galadriel, K. Blanchett, the boss, perform all their super arts on the, on the nine, uh, Witch Kings? No, Witch Kings with the nine ring rings? Right, yeah. They perform all their super arts. And I'm like, I, I don't remember this. In order, in order to fill time, they added some shit from the Somerilius.

They ordered, they added a lot. Yeah. They added a lot. Which is almost like they shouldn't have made three movies. It's almost like. It's almost as if that wasn't the initial plan, and then the movie company forced them to. You may say. You may say.

I heard the Hobbit was being turned into a movie. The first thought I had was, dude, that's awesome. The Hobbit's super short compared to Lord of the Rings. Yeah. It will make a perfect 90 minute film. A movie. Possibly two hours. So, at the end of Hobbit 2, the dragon talks to Bilbo.

Don't even say Hobbit 2. Like that. Hobbit 2. And that makes me upset. Because I don't remember what the name, the sub-title was. Desolation of Smaug. Smaug. So, they talk to each other for three and a half hours, and you literally get sick of

the dragon. But it's a Sherlock reunion, guys. Get hyped. It kind of is. You're not even wrong. I thought you said we weren't going to talk about M-Preg on this podcast. You never said that. Well, I never.

I never said that. And the ending of the Hobbit 3 is literally Orlando Bloom running around in triangle, circle, square, and X are all around him. And they're all being pressed because it's just fucking Legolas of War. It is so bad. Because I remember in all the special features of the Lord of the Rings movies, they go, we need a leggy moment. It's the most George Lucas style thing.

He swings under the horse to get on top of it. So. He swings under the horse. He surfs down a shield. That description finally has segwayed me into what I've been thinking the whole time. It is baffling that within a much shorter time frame, Peter Jackson managed to have his own prequel trilogy turn out exactly the same. Not as bad.

Not as bad. No, no. But the exact same problem. Remember. The exact same. I think it's worse because he had source material. Yes. It's way worse.

Yes. No, you're right. You're right. So, he almost told Toro was supposed to direct two movies and that was it always from the start. Then he dropped out. Then he threw up after seeing the words Hobbit and two next to each other. Also, also Tintin didn't suck.

Tintin was great. Sure. But it was just battle after battle after battle. I don't remember anything Bilbo fucking did in this movie. I don't remember anything. He hit in the barrels. Wait, that was the first movie. I don't give a shit anymore.

No, that was the second movie. Oh, fuck it. Anyway. The story is backstory about the fucking white orc and his whole deal. The white orc isn't it so much. Anyway, I was really disappointed with it. What a disappointing end to, like, or start of the trilogy. Anyway.

I got the Token Edit for you. I think I will watch it because that's four hours, right? Four hours. Token Edit even good. Yes. Is it better than the first movie? Because the first movie I think was terrible. The first movie is godlike compared to the second and third.

I thought it was terrible. The Token Edit is scene for scene book scenes together as is. And that's it. Yeah. And to finish it off, I saw two really great movies. Furious 7 because it was better than The Hobbit and more emotional. It was ridiculous. I wrote on my Twitter, stop the world.

I want to get off. Because why is this Furious 7 movie making me feel more than The Hobbit? Whatever. All of the five blah blah blahs. What was Fast and Furious 6 called? Furious, I don't know. The one where Paul Walker didn't die? Because, like, everything about...

I've only seen Tokyo Drift. Not Tokyo Drift. That's the worst one. It was just called Fast and Furious 6. It was just the worst one, right? Everything about this... That was Bow Wow, right? I don't know.

Yes, it was. Everything about this series is the best because... It used to be the worst, but now it's the best. It gets better and better. It is... Remember how we joke about the way Rambo and Rocky movies are fucking named? Yes. Nobody can touch this series now.

Every single fucking entry has had a completely different convention. You had Fast, The Fast, and The Furious. Then you had Too Fast, Too Furious. Then you had Fast, Not The... Fast and Furious. Tokyo Drift. Then you had what? I don't know.

I think it was just called Fast and the Furious. No, it was called Fast and Furious. Then the fifth one was called Fast 5. Fast and Furious 6. Then Furious 7. Guess what? There's no rules. Pat, shut up.

I'm going to blow your mind. There's also a chronologically accurate version of these. I know. Tokyo Drift happens in the future. It happens after the future up until Fast 7. Because there's a character that dies in Tokyo Drift. That hasn't died in 4 or 5 or 6. This is fucking Metal Gear Kojima levels.

When you read the movie magazine, it says, Guess what? What you're watching, Furious 7, is not the latest one. Stop, stop, stop. Shut up. Is Paul Walker in Part 2? Yes. Paul Walker's in all of them.

It's not in Tokyo Drift. It's in Tokyo. And it's in the future, which is great. Because now that Paul Walker's unfortunately passed, they already set up the fact that in Tokyo Drift, he's not there. Okay, so they handled that. He's quit by Tokyo Drift.

Okay. Just really, really quickly. What the fuck? Just really, really quickly. Amazing action scenes. My mind was a little bit melting. Every 3 seconds. Well, I'm not sure if you know who they added.

They added Tony Jaw. Yeah, I know. Has incredible fight scenes with Paul Walker. Fight scenes? Fight scenes. Hand to hand. Awesome fight scenes. Kurt Russell.

Rod Rhonda Rousey is in there. Jason Statham is in the building. Jason Statham. Rod Rhonda Rousey has one of the most awesome woman-on-woman fights ever. Like, it's fucking brutal. It's brutal than more of the guys' fights. It was fucking awesome.

She can take it. She's a fighter. She can fucking take it. And then the rock is actually silent for most of the movie. He does the one coolest thing where his arm is in a cast because Jason Statham beat the shit out of him. Right? So, Rock is in a cast in his arm and he goes,

I've got to help my family. Dom. And then he heads on to WWE and shows. His arm is in a cast. He just flexes and it bursts. And it's so fucking cool. Also, to clear up the time travel thing with Willie, there was a moment in, I think, Fast 4 or Fast 5,

I remember hearing people talk about, people assumed it took place after Tokyo Drift. And then a dead character just shows up on screen. It's amazing. And it's like, that's what? Oh, shit. That's ambitious. That is, we didn't expect our fucking cash to go this far.

We didn't expect the money to be this good. Michelle Rodriguez is out of jail and in the movie again. And what you just described is, Frank Punisher, you're not going to do this without me. Yeah, you're totally right. Really quickly, they have a scene where, like, apparently lots of people cry where they send off Paul Walker. And they had a really classy part.

I'm like, oh, this is actually pretty nice. Stop it right there. And they go, no. Do you know that he died? And then they go further and give him even more of a send off? No. Not saying that he died in the movie. There's not spoilers.

They're just like, look at Paul Walker. Look how awesome he is. Well, like, some spoilers if you give a fuck. But does his character die? No, that's what I mean. Right. He does not die. They go, look how awesome this fucking guy is.

And then they have a scene where I'm like, the entire movie, I'm going, where did they replace Paul Walker? I can't tell for 99% of the movie. He's in it the entire way. It feels organic. I'm like, wow, I'm really impressed. I don't know what he missed. But the one scene at the end, you kind of miss,

where he turns to Vin Diesel in a car. And I can, maybe if you didn't know the Paul Walker died, you wouldn't have noticed. But since I know that he died, I'm like, look at this take from Fast and the Furious 2, where they took his face and put it on a thing. And put it in the car. And he's looking at Vin Diesel like, yeah.

What's up? Yeah. And I'm like, oh no, that's the one. That's the one. Was it a decent CG or? Cut Bruce Lee's face out. Another actor's body. Another actor's body in the car that Paul Walker's face.

Was it alright looking or? It was alright looking like I said I knew. It's like in the back of my head. No, of course. And really, really quickly, the actual awesome, awesome movie I watched over the weekend was Nightcrawler with Jake Gyllenhaal. Nightcrawler with Jake Gyllenhaal.

Fucking awesome. Highly recommended. He plays a crazy sociopath that just finds it, gets a camera and just videotapes death and crime. And crime is happening, yeah. And crime in Los Angeles. Guess who Bill Paxton plays? A sleazy car salesman type.

And he's still awesome in it. He's still the best. Jake Gyllenhaal plays a character that's such a sociopath that he can only recite things he's researched and seen on the internet and doesn't have his own opinions. He just says like a fact. And he says it with such like banality and like, well, this is the way the world works.

And he was just really awesome. Like Patrick Bateman, American Psycho levels of, oh, this guy's awesome. But also like a creepy psycho weirdo. I get what you're saying though. Like I have problems with American Psycho, but Jake is a really good actor. He really is.

And in this, like I was, I never knew, what is the fucking ending of this movie? I have no fucking clue. I have no idea where it's going. And it has the style of like driving. American Psycho is fucking amazing. That's my look of incredulity and shit. Is that movie's amazing?

It is an amazing movie. Yeah. But I don't think Christian Bale is amazing. I think everything about the movie, except him, is awesome. And that's where I'm coming from. I disagree, but I won't dismiss it like I was just dismissing what you said. So I'll, yeah, like, okay.

I get scripted for writing the direction. I don't agree with you. The events that occur. But I don't think you're wrong. All right. Yeah. That's my, that's my. But I highly recommend it.

I can see that. It's kind of a tough watch here in there because you just see morals being shat on. I'm like, oh my God, I can't believe this guy's doing that. And like the entire movie, I'm like, I don't know what the ending is going to be. I have no fucking clue what's going to happen to him. What's going to happen to them.

I have no idea where it's going. And it was still like a creepy like suitable ending, like one of the better movies like of last year. When I saw the title, I almost watched it, but then I seriously realized it wasn't an X-Men movie. That's what I said on Twitter. Guess what? Everyone, it's not about the,

it's not about Kurt Wagner. You would have caught Fox's marketing trend. No, I'm sure. And that's why I was so like, oh, I'm not calling this the term for getting a video tape. Also, it would make sense for them to do that and see who's the most popular character next to. So I got the ending spoiled for me at some point

because I live on the internet and it makes me want to see the movie more. Like it's one of those ending spoilers where I'm like, oh, how does that, how does the, how do you get from the trailer to the ending that someone just told me basically? Because I can't, I actually can't see the path. The last scene scenario that leads into the ending,

like it's one of those moments where you're watching a movie and I was watching it with the misses and we're both like completely silent. That's what the fuck is going to happen. And just little gasps here and they're like, oh, fuck, oh my God. And it was like, by far the best movie I've ever seen. It's like having a good meal with your family

and no one's talking. Why? Because the movie was awesome. Is it on theaters now or is it on Netflix? Oh, it's been out of theaters for a long time. Yeah, it's out of theaters. That's the thing. It's like when I actually go,

let's go see Nightcrawler, gone from theaters. So where'd you catch it? It's not on Netflix. I found it. You found it. You found it. All right.

It's still immensely, it's not even on Xbox video or PSN yet. All right. Let's take a look. Yeah. Let's take a quick word from our sponsors. Today's episode is brought to you by Loot Crate. The ludiest.

And we've got two months of crates. Two months of crates. Oh, the February. Here's what you had missed in the downturn. Yeah. Now Matt, I had went and definitely like brought to you a shirt that I thought was tailor made for you. Yeah, except for that it was two sizes too big.

Because it was my size. But the subject material was James Bond looking really sad and he goes, it's not stirred. Holding is martini. But this was a spy themed box that came with all kinds of good stuff, including this spy watch. You tap the button and then the time appears

and then it disappears because no one can know you're wearing it. And it comes out in like weird hexagon stuff. It's pretty cool. Survival rope bracelet. How does that do? How does that help you? It looks like anal beads to me.

No, no, you untie it. Everything can be anal beads. I'm confused right now. No, no, no. Like this is definitely going in my go bag. Are those cyanide pills? You untie. His go bag.

He's ready to go bag. You untie like one of these knots and pull it out and you have rope, which is good for whatever you need rope for. Don't push it though. In the jungle. Yeah, definitely. In the jungles of the city we live in.

The concrete jungle. You have a go bag but you don't have trip-proof shoes. There you go. Shit, I'm lost in the fucking jungle. I guess I'm fucked. My go bag needs material. Hey girl, have my go bag. Yeah, it's ready to go.

I mean, we got a classified note book, which is actually a notebook. But it's got a little seal and it's classified. It's pretty cool. Dude, I don't want to un-seal it. Like the seal is the best part. Yeah. And there's all kinds of goody,

like spy related goodies and things inside there. Is there a laser? Is there like a moon raker laser? A moon raker laser is a bit... That's a bit much for a loot crate. It's a bit much for a loot crate. I suppose so. And we got spy manuals.

And the box is like a cool spy keyboard. It is. It is. That's kind of cool. And then right... This one has a way cooler box. You got, check this out. Wait, what is this?

That suits a ladder? What is that? No, it's a crate packing simulator or something. Right? And this comes with... Self-aware. Like a robot ant. Okay.

You like... It comes with batteries. You put it on, you have a little like, a robotic ant. Wait, does it come out of there? Yeah, of course. I thought it was like a snow globe. No, just packaging.

But... Right, monies. You guys remember monies? No. They had a whole bunch of... A vinyl figure. Yeah, you like, you draw them yourself and there was a whole bunch of

really cool street fireworks. Oh, okay. So that one is a protoform from... These words. Exactly. This one is a blank so you can design it yourself. And this is the one that came with, of course, the book, Ready Player One.

Pat, you should read that book. This book. That sounds like it's right under my eye. All kinds of good stuff. So, that's the kind of goodies you get in your loot crates for month to month, gentlemen. Dude, that must cost like a thousand dollars. Not even.

What? I bet it costs way less. For less than twenty bucks a month, sir. What? All this gear sent straight to your house. And if you head down down to promo code... Excuse me. Yeah!

If you head down down to the promo code. If you head down down to lootcrate.com slash super and you use the promo code super, you get to save three bucks on your new subscription. So it's even cheaper than that. They should send really a crate on how to speak good. Yeah. Sometimes that's a problem.

I'll never find that in a box. Maybe you will. Oh. Next month. Oh, loot crate. Oh. No, thanks, though, loot crate. Thank you, loot crate.

Thanks a lot. Wait, wait, the loot crate spot's not over because we just found a free digital download of Ninjack number one. Oh, of course Willie would bring up Ninjack. So you gotta, you gotta, you gotta get your loot crate on. Wow, I was just pushing Ninjack. Comixology's got a digital copy of Ninjack.

Yo! Shut up! You don't even know anything about Ninjack. And today's episode is also brought to us by Audible. Audible.com is the place where you go to find over 180,000 audiobooks to choose from. Does the number keep getting higher? It keeps increasing, which is kind of weird

because it was already way, way, way past the amount of books you could read or listen to in a human lifetime. That I thought were written, but day by day it creeps to infinity. It's like, wow, it's a hundred and eighty lifetimes worth of books. If you subscribe to Audible, it will eventually

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That's how that works. Yeah. And it's got annotated bookmarks, easy chapter navigation, all the features that let you listen to it on all your devices and continue where you left off from one to the other. Is that Whispersync?

That's Whispersync. I just want to skip to the chapter where Lewis Black describes the infinite hell that is the mail system every day. Not unlike the infinite hell that is standing in between two Starbucks right across from each other.

Yeah. He's great at that. Yeah. But if that's not your thing, you can check out Amy Poehler's Yes, Please. Bram Stoker's Dracula. Ready Player One. Does Bram Stoker read it?

No. Wow. I like Amy Poehler's Dracula. That's awesome. You know who does? What? Tim fucking Curry. That's like the better picture.

He took my brain a second. And then it took me a second. Do I like that? Yes, I do. Tim Curry once played Satan. There you go. So all this and more over at audiblepodcast.com

slash super best. Head on down. Try it now. Thanks, Audible. Thanks, Audible. Thanks, Audible. Thanks, Pat. Yo, I've been playing video games.

I've played Monster Hunter Shocker. Ignore that. I'm a G-special crown. Silver, whatever. Fuck it. Nobody cares. I saw somebody on Reddit say, hey, Pat, you want to give an update

on what you're doing in Monster Hunter every week on the podcast? No. It's the most boring shit in the world to listen to. It's Ronaldo. Fuck, yeah. I beat Gog Masios and I'm working on getting Raging Bracket Deos parts.

That's what's happening. I can relate. It's sometimes just topics where you're like, you're talking to the air. The people that get it will get it. No, that's what's happening. It's like Blake saying, I'm farming this vegetable.

Actually, I can't actually hear that. That would be nice. No, but you know what I mean? It's like I'm still doing it. So as for different shit, you can't farm different vegetables each week. That's fucking crazy. He's right.

Actually, that's totally insane. That's fucking insane. Instead, it would be I'm farming the corn again. You can totally do that, actually. Yeah, farming the corn again. You know you can actually totally do that. No. You can.

They have different. What kind of different schedules? You have to have set up with the... Wait, do you have one of those four plots slash and burn fucking set up? Oh, you mean the... Oh, god damn it. I learned this in history.

Shit. Everyone did. The thing system. Nice. The Farin system? No. No. You see that Twitter picture of a guy saying,

don't worry, California. I got this. And he has an envelope saying to California. And he's just... How does it... Yeah, it's like all I know is Harvest Moon is bullshit. You cannot grow everything yourself. You're good.

Unless you're in California. Uh-oh. You need water. How do you do that? I played a lot of Pillars of Attorney. I played a lot of it because... They patched it. No, they fixed it.

They patched shit up in it. All of it. Every single thing I talked about last week... Even the crippling loading bug? ...has been completely fixed. Double clicking? Yes. Yes.

Every bug I brought up last week has been fixed. The only ones that remain are minor interface and... There's a couple interface bugs with certain characters, like bars, show up in the wrong place. I've run into some bugs where I use a higher text size than is average. And so sometimes the text size will overlap with something. And some people will encounter some minor bugs. But this has been easily the smoothest PC RPG launch of all time.

Without any qualification, it is astounding how smooth this game is after its first patch. Sure. And it is really amazing, except... Except it's not? There are bits and pieces where you feel like this is a Kickstarter game. There are tiny parts... Too many references to pop culture and internet bits? No.

I mean where there are two NPCs that you can tell these people had so much... No, these characters had so much more dialogue originally. And then you read up on it and those characters are one fourth the size that they used to be. One of which had a mine dungeon that you were able to go into, but they had to cut for time. That and the game also feels... And once you get to the first big city you can start to feel it. This is a game made by people who were afraid... If you see me at the beginning of the documentary, Obsidian was right about to go bankrupt right before the Kickstarter.

Because a publisher pulled out on a deal and a game fell out. And they had to lay off half the staff and they were going to go bankrupt. This feels like a game made by people that are terrified that they're going to go bankrupt. You mean like Final Fantasy I? No. But you know like Final Fantasy I was like we're going to die this is our last game. It's slightly too safe. It's slightly too...

Like you know how it's somewhat generic but interesting fantasy setting? Sure. It's slightly too safe on that. It's slightly too safe on how you can't break your game. Like you can't seem to... If you get a faction and you go with that faction there is a roughly equivalent faction on the other side that will hate you. But the next time through the game you can then go with the other one and it's not wildly very... So far it's a lot better than Baldur's Gate 1.

It's not quite as good as Baldur's Gate 2. I keep looking at pillars and I keep saying oh I should play that. And then I say wait no I want to play Tides. I want to just wait for Tides to come out. The Pillars of Eternity is a fantastic game so far. I'm 25 hours in. And it is way better than Baldur's Gate 1 and I would say... I didn't play Icewind Dale 1 or 2 but I'd say it's de facto better than them because those games don't have parties.

They don't have party members. They have like created characters and I think that's super boring. I don't like that either. But you can feel where they had to cut back in places even though they blew the fucking top off their goal. And it's just slightly too safe. But that's the only bad thing I can say about it. The biggest problem is that it has so many interface and quality of life improvements that you can never ever ever go back. You can never go back to spell casting without the goddamn visible AoE.

On the target reticle. You can never go back to a sneak mode that is a button and auto-detects traps. Because now it's how it should be. You can never go back to the fucking spell selection menu that would be a goddamn symbol and you would not be able to read what the spell does and all that shit. It's still amazing. The same thing as playing Deus Ex Human Revolution and then going back to Deus Ex 1. And that has the same problem. I think Deus Ex Human Revolution was just like 5% too safe.

But the mechanical improvements across the board are so enormous. I tried to play Deus Ex 1 after playing in the real world. Me too. It was like the most blowback my hair experience ever of like no, no, no, no, no, no. Like remember when we went back to System Shock 2 for this shit storm and we were like this game is fantastic. This game is a fucking classic. I hate it. I hate it. Why is it gotta be like this?

So that's all I played but I did also watch like 5 movies that I want to talk about. Luckily they're easy to fly through. I watched Police Story 3 for the first time. But I didn't mean Jackie Chan? Yeah, that's correct. You started at 3? Yes, because I didn't watch Police Story 3. I watched Supercop, the English Dumb of Police Story 3 and boy let me tell you this is some shit.

The amount of, first of all, my favorite dub in the world is Jackie Chan dubbing himself in English. I think that is the fucking best thing in the world. It's hilarious. It makes me laugh so hard because everyone has British slash English accents except for Jackie Chan. Pretty good. So I don't know if you guys have seen Supercop. Meet the cop who can't be stopped. Yeah.

I've seen clips from that. Dude, they say the word Supercop and call Kevin Chan the Supercop like 40 times. In the movie. It is unreal. I have never seen it. In any movie, Willie, you would blow your pants off at this shit. The first scene in the movie is him walking into the police station and his two bosses are arguing because Mainland Chinese Interpol needs a Supercop. Well, we have a Supercop.

You can't just give them our Supercop. And then when he's talking to the fucking Mainland Chinese people, they tell us you're a Supercop. And he says, what's Supercop Chan? And he goes, Supercop's a very common name in Hong Kong. And it's so goofy. It's so fucking epic. I can imagine how much shit the regular cops most feel. Like, oh, I think I'm a Supercop in my heart.

Okay. If the fucking Supercop gets all the Supercop. Non-main characters. Like there's the main villain and his brother and the main, the female main character that is alongside Jackie who is better than Jackie in a lot of that movie. Amazing. I've never heard of her. She's apparently big in Hong Kong cinema, but she's fucking awesome. She's doing like just as dangerous stunts.

And you look at the bloopers and she has half of them. Um, whatever the fuck was I going to say. Supercop. Supercop. Just, just, there is Kung Pao levels of fucking, there's her and she's good voice acted. But the fucking side characters like the henchmen, they are actually, they're actually talking like Kung Pao extras. Oh, here guys. Okay.

Like, straight up. It's unbelievable. It's unbelievable. And then there's every time Kevin Chan and the head of the Chinese police are driving anywhere or the villains driving anywhere and a car pulls up in the shot, Tupac is playing out of the fucking sky. Oh, of course he is. And it is.

It's great out of Compton. Yeah. That's not Tupac. But I know. It's awesome. It's fucking awesome. It's so stupid. And the stunts in that movie are outrageous.

There's a, there's a motocross jump on to a moving train, which is unbelievable, especially when you watch the movie afterwards of the three takes that she fucked and just flew off the side of the train. Is it like, is it like chocolate where you, while the credits are rolling? They're all like that. Exactly. And, and, and fucking Jackie like missing his spots on the, that's a police story three is where he's hanging from the helicopter on the, on the road platter.

It's that one. Like, great movie already. Police story is where Lei Wulong even comes from. Like specifically that series. Absolutely. And that's Chunlin. Yeah, that's Chunlin. I'm watching the movie and like, oh my God, that's actually Chunlin.

Like this, this, this female character is Chunlin. She works for Airpole. She's like a Chinese, like super kung fu lady. Like it's exactly there. Yeah. If you want to combine them both. She's even got braids for half the movie. You should watch City Hunters and see when Jackie Jackson has seen that movie.

I've seen that movie. No one has not seen that movie. No, it's not. It's not. It's not five movies. I'm sorry. It's four. I, because I stopped watching the fourth one.

So I watched it man. Finally. I had never watched it. He said hit man. I'm like, yeah. Or Yip man. Yip man one. Yip man one is a fucking fantastic movie.

And Donnie is so thin. Oh, yeah. It's weird. Because the first time I ever saw Donnie in was in Shapo Lang and he's fucking huge. Oh, really? Yeah. Oh, okay. You got, you got like a weird.

I got like a right. And you forget that, that Donnie Yen was in Blade Two as Ice Man. I didn't forget that. I did that. I did that. Get that. Okay. So that, and man, one fucking great movie.

Watch it man too. Because it's pretty. I did. That's the same movie. I watched it. After that. Which is basically the fucking Kamogawa arc from Epo. Sure.

Yeah. Yeah. Now the thing is. And it man two is awesome. Like I have nothing bad to say about it. Man two is amazing. No. It solves every problem.

Like they had more Samo Hong, Jackie Chan-esque kung fu stunts. Right. Only things are just like, it's like, okay. Like in Wing Chun, like it's the guy, that guy's history is pretty cool. It's not that cool. So hold on a second. So it man one takes place in World War Two era China basically. And it man one has rough times because the Japanese are dicks in that era.

It man two takes place in like, I think 1944 Hong Kong. In which he's trying to start up a martial arts school and make a new life in Hong Kong. Because Hong Kong was relatively isolated from the war. And he ends up fighting an American boxer because the American boxer killed Samo Hong. Now, really quickly that American boxer then went on to play Kano in Mortal Kombat Legacy. He didn't. And then that guy unfortunately then just died. So.

Right. Cause just like the other actor that played Kano also died. In it man two, we start to like all believe that the actual it man fought a Japanese general in a death battle. I'll believe that. But what I'm having trouble believing is that it man in an unpublicized relatively unknown event beat the world champion heavyweight boxer of England. Actually. Right. Okay.

Wait a second. That didn't happen. I know that didn't happen. It was fearless. And that was fucking horse shit. Yeah. So whatever. Artistic license.

And that's fine. I don't have a problem with that. All in the interest of making a good movie. The problem is that right after the next day after I watched it man two, I watched it man the college years. Oh no. The spin off of when he was a child. That's the one where Donnie Yen said I'm not doing this shit. Yes.

But then he was. And he was right to do it. So let's start with some problems. Right away the first character you see in this movie is Sam Ohung who I just described died in the last movie in 1944. But these it man's masters master and is the same character is the actual same character. His hair is gray in the same spot. I believe he's wearing the same outfit. And both characters are dying of some unknown lung illness and require heated medicine brought to them by their pupils.

It is astounding. And he dies five minutes in the movie. Great. Fine. We meet young it man who's supposed to look like Donnie Yen. He does not. And then. Oh really.

We get some flashback. It man's grown up. He's learning Wing Chun. And now he's an adult and he's super good at Wing Chun. He's super cool. And we get a story about how he meets his wife which I believe is probably the I didn't manage to look it up because that detail. It's like this is probably the only true part about this movie because did you know that it man in his youth had an adopted brother that was a secret Japanese spy that conspired to kill his master and several members of the Chinese community. I don't know.

And it man's brother is played by Jin who was his rival slash pal in it man one and two. It's the same actor. He just shaved the beard. I don't know if we'll change this. But when it man three was playing in the fantasy film bustling me and two other people. Let's go see it. And I remember what he's going. No.

I'm not. No. So I'm not. I'm not watching that. I'm like we talked about it. Man. He's like yeah I do. But I'm going to watch that.

Whatever. You're lame. And then you watch the third movie. You're like oh we should have. So. Because. Because. Because like.

Okay. Okay. Wait. I'm not. So. It's just it's like the guy the the seafood that I had for the. The period of time. Yeah.

Yeah. Was a dude that was one of the students directly. Oh yeah. I remember him. I remember him. Yeah. All right. Master Yi.

And like it's just fucking like when they were first coming out with the first one. Everyone there and everyone involved is like this is so exciting. It's awesome. Everyone's gonna see Wing Chun. It's gonna be cool. And then in the first movie when you see all the townspeople doing that form that form in the streets when they're practicing. Yeah.

That's accurate as fuck. Yeah. And in the second one you're like you're stretching it a bit. It's a little more Jackie Chan. But you're like you want to deliver a movie sequel to excite people so it's cool. And that man too is amazing. And then you get to the third year like you throw it all out and you just don't give a fuck anymore.

And you're just going. Wacky. Fucking. Remember when. Remember when it had a fucking. There is. And I saw it. Hold on.

Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. Leading back to the series but I'll give you the first one.

It's a saloon. So in this movie there's long sequences in which people are arguing in English because the primary antagonist are British asshole imperialist in which the champion of boxing is screaming at it and it a bunch of racist shit and it's standing there and he doesn't speak English. He just the character does not speak English. It. Man doesn't speak English. Yes.

He doesn't know what's happening. The crux. The finale. The man is translating it to the crowd and it's really awesome. One of the first things that happens in the I called it man three but apparently there's an actual it man three being made with Donnie N. Shut up. Really?

Which will apparently be good. But I call this. All he did was teach people. So I'm just going to call this it man the college years or whatever. I don't know the actual name. No. No. Yeah.

Whatever. This movie is that it man because he is such a prodigy at Wing Chun and he's such a good guy. They sent him to a English Catholic school university to educate him where he learns to speak English perfectly. Perfectly. Wow. That's talent.

As he as he leaves as he leaves the university the priest says goodbye man it and he says no no father our surname goes first look and speaks English to characters later in the movie. And then the character is now like Stephen Colbert of the character and then his brother one turns out to be a Japanese spy he was a sergeant in the Japanese army at the age of 12 and at some point in hiding managed to learn not only Wing Chun almost as good as it man but judo and karate too and ninja sword fighting fuck it right. So that's like whoa I'm blowing my mind here.

And then I started to watch it man the final fight which is about you just said I'm all in it. Which is about being old get fucking except the fact that it only saw the fight takes place in 1949 Hong Kong where he is moving to Hong Kong for the first time without his family to start a new life. So first of all what the fuck I thought he already lived in Hong Kong as of it man too but fuck that he's like a 65 year old bald man in this movie. Yeah.

What I think the fourth movie is supposed to be like an apology. It's supposed to be more realistic but that's the best but here's where it's great bald man is what grab master actually here's like and here's where it breaks at the end of it man one. They have a little blog for it man and says yeah hey you know what he taught a lot of people Wing Chun including Bruce Lee and here's a photo here's a photo of it man and Bruce Lee isn't that cool and you know yeah that's cool. The end of it man too has a six year old Bruce Lee who is thumbing his nose walking into it

man's apartment and go I'm Bruce Lee I'm going to be the best in the world to train me. His name wasn't even Bruce Lee at that point that's like an adopted American name. I know and then in the head the first thing the first thing that happens in it man for after the the the opening prologue crawl is he is doing laundry and his son calls out to him and says yo dad your students on TV again and it's fucking Bruce Lee unlike the Ed Sullivan show or some shit doing kung fu shit and I'm just like I fucking get it man. You train Bruce Lee this guy is awesome you don't have to keep tying him Bruce Lee but

that's not the biggest problem. You know you can just make a Bruce Lee. That's not the biggest problem. I'll tell you what it is. The big game of death here's the biggest problem and this is this is a problem with any movie that you're trying to base off a historical thing and you fudge the facts right if you're going to fudge the facts you have to keep fudging those facts because if you don't you run the risk of causing some immersion shattering plot holes and I don't mean the minor shit

about him being able to speak English that's really annoying it makes those scenes goofy but it's not like a deal breaker. The deal breaker is when in the opening title crawl prologue a voiceover of it man for the final fight or whatever the fuck they discuss how they had to leave Foshan because the Japanese army were being dicks and they had a hard time after that. He also the opening title crawl it's a son saying it also describes how it man they their family had such a hard time when he was growing up that their two his two baby sisters died of starvation during the war which happens in the background of it man

one they're over there you don't see you don't see this at all there's a baby that's born in it man two you know what happened to her she starved to death as well as her sister who died offscreen in it man one that is movie running that is fucked up you can't do that you can't because those babies didn't know cool martial arts so why do you know them in the movie retro actively mention that babies died in offscreen offscreen if the babies can't go like buh buh buh buh buh buh buh why even highlight them who cares it's a wretch I turned it off I hit the point where Bruce Lee's on TV and I was like no I'm out I don't know for certain but I'm pretty sure that his grandkids like sign off on this the movie

someone has his son right in it man exact so but that and that's the thing as an old master but it took it took like the first one was like okay we got to make sure everything's right and they took so much time going over it and then by the time it made money it just became a fuck just keep pumping it out you can't you can't do if you built if you built a lie hey hey if it's a lie then you fight on that lie and what Slim Charles was right okay and but here's what's even more insane about it just in terms of like you're trying to make a movie and what's interesting and entertaining you didn't you're gonna keep going back to this cow to try to milk it when the actual story of winged son the woman who's

named after the thing yeah is way more interesting yes it has so much cool shit going on every and you just have to jump back a few generations only lip service you get on that is that every single movie has a moment in which somebody who doesn't know about Wing Chun comes up to it man it goes that's a dumb that's a dumb martial art it was made by a woman it must be shitty and then that person gets the shit kicked out of it yeah so her story is super interesting and if you wanted to branch out you would do that but then the movie couldn't be called and I spoke about this on Twitter last because you can't if it's is actually I know no because how fucking disrespectful would it be for the movie to be called student

of a the master you know the name of the student is the top billing and the person seven generations back that taught you you know I'm really disappointed that young Bruce Lee when he flipped his nose didn't say like oh man I hope I don't have to fight some demon with the Naganata in my head it's 50 years oh shit it's pretty close but diapers yellow and black and he has to fight Karima towards Jafar baby okay woolly you make you make a joke you make a joke are his are his diapers yellow back he's like six years old or maybe eight tops very he's wearing a white and blue checkered shirt yeah and tan slacks which is what he is wearing in the photo they show at the end of it man to I don't know if you remember that but they

are they literally take this photo of Bruce Lee in it man and they fucking make baby Bruce Lee wear the same clothes so last thing I want to say about it may as well be wearing a shirt that just says Bruce Lee absolutely yeah last thing I want to say about it man three and I said I blew this up on Twitter and some people it was at four in the morning so nobody saw it is that this is the first movie I've ever watched that was of Chinese in origin that I can't speak Chinese I'm not even passingly familiar Chinese right like we're all the first I've heard about this we're all passingly familiar with Japanese will leave your you you and woolly Liam and woolly are more than passingly familiar with

Japanese you can speak it a little right you leave you can read it but even at night we've played so many fucking video games I know I know Japanese it's it's not it's not meaningless words like a lot of other Asian languages are but this fucking movies acting is so bad it is so fucking bad that I don't need to know I can't I can't help it is it is a true it is some of the worst acting I've ever seen in a movie is unbelievable is unbelievable you have what I can only assume are the equivalent hi it man hi it's like anime voice acting coming out of real people in Chinese everyone's voiced by Chinese and the first like 30 minutes of that movie is it man and his brother and their girl and their lady their their child

girlfriend as children I don't know how to say it it's childhood friend childhood friend and they are the worst actors ever those kids are unbelievable they are unbelievable it is it is so bad dude like that movie is dog shit top to bottom except for like the like there are two fight scenes in that like even half the fight scenes are just like like there's a there's a fight scene where he's fighting an old man in a in a medicine shop and they don't want to break anything it's lame it's super lame that sounds like such a good premise for a fight scene it's okay I don't know if you remember this in it man one that's the first fight scene they're fighting in it man's house and he doesn't want to break it right that fights great no that's the that's

actually multiple fight scenes in it man one or that sure when he fights that guy in his home and his little baby like like is driving like a little guy so cool and he's like oh I can't and in this it's like dude that he's fighting it man's son yeah like his actual for real guy who is like 99 years old right and it is terrible you can see that he's an old man and they can't move fast and you're like well if you're that you can't use movie magic to hide it then why do it it's like Hong Kong cinema directing it's not directing doesn't you can't do the speed-up shots with this kind of thing it doesn't work so yeah uh and man one two great it man uh three and four train wreck that's all right if you're not burned out on Donnie Yen Samo Hong I'm not uh kill zone

watch kill well that's that's that's that's that's the shit we've been talking about the whole time with the knife versus the con by SPL okay all I just know this is called okay SPL equals chapeau line equals kill zone they're all the same SPL it's got Donnie Yen it's got Samo Hong and it's got not only that it's got fucking Wu Jing yeah and Wu Jing is like badass you know what you know what chapeau lang has chapeau lang has a scene in which Donnie Yen as a as a cop that is he's a hair trigger over the line cop yeah gets frustrated gets frustrated with a perk and punches him so hard that he gives him disabling brain damage and then out of guilt goes to hang out with him every week and does what woolly he plays KOF 2000 oh yeah and they fight on that fucking clog

stage yeah yeah and and the other guy picks uh a chang one thing oh oh that reminds me in in police story three slash super cop there is a scene in which the boss is playing what is clearly super turbo on the genesis you can hear all the super turbo noises it's perfect they walk away and see the TV in the background and he's on line one of tetris that's better than that's better than fucking rumble in the Bronx where the kid on the game gear has no game in it but it's still making noises what about i love video game representation what about charlie's angels where they bust in those two kids rooms playing multiplayer in uh 40 year old virgin they're playing mk deception or pads yeah they are like um there it is saving fighting games in the shitty year so yeah

what it's worth kung fu movies are great but yeah what it's worth right and they're minefield too yeah if you want and on donnie ends still doing cool shit there i just saw a trailer for uh kung fu killer which is his new movie and it looks fucking sick what happens in that movie he beats the shit out of some dudes yeah really hard shocking and you always see like the thing that's what else what do you mean anything is you always see the the trailer shots where it's like these are the shots where the stunt guy just took the hit yeah this is not yeah it's like no just take it we'll pay you for it but the only thing they did to extra they don't need to pay him out is they dusted the hero's foot so that's how you do it that's how you do it uh the my takeaway from all

this uh legend dragon master and chapo lang are still my number one and number two chapo lang's hard to beat legend dragon master is the fight against the x gang is the most unbelievable fucking choreograph thing ever he puts indian at jones in that movie he fights indiana jones simon belmont in that in fucking legend dragon master that thing is unbelievable there's kung fu movie classes i mean you gotta go you gotta get your wang fei hong in there you got there's so many places to go with that shit i need to i need to i need to sit down and do the research on wiki or whatever and do like okay general vega and do like okay who is wang fei hong like like straight up no like no for real like who is wang fei hong because this dude is the guy

that doesn't use a sword in last play because because yeah but it's like in itman 2 they go up to it man it's like oh foshan guys are all badasses what are you wang fei hong and i'm like i don't get that yeah like who is who are you the bullet club like is he the hero of the boxer revolution like ah i need to do the research i need to do the research ladder factories and all that like foshan as a city that exists is my new favorite thing because it's just ancient chinese sub-town yeah pretty much it's the town that all the badasses congregate to fight and be like no much because it's okay to run like that like every day some dude walks into town and goes i'm gonna beat all of you for what it's worth for what it's worth in in in uh wang chun class the only thing

they play the entire time every class all day is once upon a time in china theme song looping over and over and over and over and over so they know yeah they know yeah anyway so that's my week sorry if i went a little long that's that's the trip i took in the refreshing week from you that the took i oh thanks man usually it's just like i beat this monster you took a long route to get there i'm surprised you went into the shit but you know what sometimes investigative journalism requires why getting way way down in the filth so good job you did what i couldn't do i wouldn't wait really i couldn't i can't watch the fucking well i i backed out i guess we know who a bigger fan is of of of of china of china general i can't remember that being said she'll never again so

let's go when you when you watch a bunch of like chinese slash hong kong movies in a row like you get that feeling do you get when you watch a bunch of time movies in a row or a bunch of hollywood movies in a row i was like man every country just takes whatever that country's narrative for success or ethics and just like it like your hero has to be more like wang fei hong or more like george washington or more like fucking whoever your national hero is and that's the the lesson to take away the lesson of it man is be calm and and thoughtful and kick the shit out of foreigners which is why which is why uh singham is so fucking weird everyone's okay with it he didn't remind you he still didn't watch a second one

to see what the fuck we did i where does that go i saw a webm that fucking got me going high as well probably the same one singham blows up the government's for for rural india you want to talk moral like fucking cultural differences the fact that the movies resolved through straight up murder and everyone's like no that's correct so this is the end of the movie yes they're not beating up or defeating the bad guy they're just murdering him as they're laughing at him running for his life so this is a spoiler for the ending of singham one but we've already spoiled it so sit around and listen the end of singham one is that singham realizes that the villain who is a powerful and soon to be politic he's a crime guy but he's soon to be a politician yes and the

narrative is that in india the politics are so corrupt that once you're a politician you're immune to the cops welcome to go to singham so the solution is that singham goes to the uh the big city police chief and basically convinces him to kidnap the bad guy and then murder him in front of a hundred deputy lieutenant colonel he succeeds at this in the police chief's office where you committed suicide where's a guy committed suicide earlier and then everyone's like good job singham and that's the end of the movie hero of india and and and it's and it's just like you couldn't beat the bad guy you couldn't figure out a way to win so you just murder him that's the only solution left it's like when a right is a very bizarre lesson to take it's like when a wrestling

movie opens with a song raw murder movie closes with the same song and it's weird because the the style the nationalist thing that i'm talking about that every every country has their movies slant towards their own nationalist thing but in baliwood it's particularly strong like a lot of the plots are very very this is the same action guy meets girl and they don't kiss they but they sing but they sing and then and then the the guy has got down home country values and the big city guy is a drug dealer and it's it's very very similar in tons and tons of hollywood movies very much like hollywood movies but then this one takes that fucking weird turn that you just like wait is this like is this like a like a do this yeah yeah the royal rumble has no real rules just come in with a bunch of

brass nox and weapons you'll win come in with a fucking gun you gotta keep your mind you gotta keep in mind the importance as well of the fact that the love interest that he meets oh yeah he meets her and they have a spontaneous relationship by that girl that also just happens to be arranged by their parents yeah it's like the perfect yeah our unrestrained love that our parents also your parents totally knew this is both like they knew this is both holly and like i don't know you know it's woolly woolly remember remember you and i saw this but pat didn't it was the other old baliwood movie commando yeah it was just that really buff guy it was basically indian rambo with dancing dude i saw that movie you did i can't remember i was there with that was the

fucking best and that girl was like i couldn't tell thanks for completely erasing me from this story it's just not a lot of fantasy it's not the guy with the contacts that make him look like he's got no people yes it's not a lot of fantasy movies sometimes you'd opt out and say no no no but like that one was where i couldn't just think back on it and you're standing there waving and just you turn into sand i couldn't remember whether the guy or the girl was hotter yeah and each other i remember it was a guy dude the guy was way more attractive comparatively like he was like the indian supermanch and his catro index was 99 percent yeah always 99 percent the the reveal of that movie that the guy wasn't actually a demon he was just wearing contacts

is super weird is super bizarre because like the movie expects you to think that he actually was just so evil that he had no pupils just back the fact that the movie takes place in the real world indian scorpion and it's like wait what what what does this imply that the villagers actually thought he was like a demon looking i got scary eyes you assholes let's be scared like he punches him in the face and his contacts fall out and that's like the big reveal bollywood's great man bollywood's better and more consistent than hollywood what other culture could perfectly match up with the attack on titan theme song i know right every time every time the best all right should we talk about games or just continue on bottle i don't know have you seen the

the digest of the robot action scenes i was gonna make sure everybody shut up if you haven't seen the robot i i i i would rip off of iro you have to go find that youtube video it's about 11 minutes long and all the best it is the action digest of the last half hour of the movie it is the best movie you've never seen the robot unbelievable the fact to shut up say it perfectly because we kind of went all around it's what what we what should you put into youtube robot indian action movie yes you'll find it you'll find it bollywood robot if it looks like iro body you're on the path the robot bollywood yeah you'll get a move a thing called best action scene ever indian robot indi rahan yeah and yeah just the fact that it is a 45 year old kind of overweight indian guy

so that's the best guy i could get like you feel like combed over hair and shitty with amazing stunts and terrible cg the stunt with the two trucks is legit awesome yeah no no that's it that's it it's the best and the worst mix into one it's it's it's all right we're we do stop stop we're done we're done we're done yeah watch that on your own all right enough with the bollywood i know i don't know that's a word that no one should say enough with the bollywood it hurts but we gotta move on uh dancing's great we forgot to talk about uh in the games that are coming out this month we forgot to talk about chroma swat it's gonna happen every month through every month chroma squad is also coming out on april bonn subon brands chroma squad okay well i'm good on this because

i don't know what the fuck that is you know i do you guys do one way explain it it's the game that's like power rangers theme that was on kickstarter i don't know what the fuck that is i remember you talking about this we talked about it but i don't know what it is now i remember saying oh this is a really far from the goal now the now when you go to the website it does say inspired by hamsabon's power rangers hamsabon hamsabon's power rangers yes of course right that is hey he invented tokusatsu didn't you know hey remember everyone is the worst hey remember is his i wish he would die oh that's too much that's too much roll back a little bit i wish he would die wait wait wait wait you can do it i can do this you can do it try it again oh man

anyway like everyone remember if you're on the internet and you don't know chris sabon asshole eric bowman oh i asshole hamsabon hamsabon whatever i know he keeps saying chris because you said that last time chris sabon i was like i thought his name was for sabon whatever sabon's a dick yeah all right um but no there's a game you did not invent fucking sentai there is an awesome game called chroma squad and it looks really fun and it's basically you get your own uh it's a management sim yeah you manage your manage your power rangers oh my god you play oh you play uh sort on oh i know oh no who was who was the guy in flamenco that was like uh that camon rider uh red axe you play you get to play red axe dude you gotta watch samurai flamenco like

because that's exactly what that is like you play red axe and you're like no guys do this you gotta fight the 64 game genie warlords or whatever the fuck it wasn't in it oh but you know you got to do that whole thing get your axon rangers going right yeah which you guys should get now axon rangers like so overrated they're so overrated and gino i'm gonna just go out there gino super overrated so overrated the fact that he didn't get hit 9999 on a generic move sick but everything other than you guys are over a decade displaced from the moment yeah on sure i'm sure no but i know but it's like compared to its very exciting but here i know you didn't watch the lp but one of the things i took away from super mario rpg was like man chrono jigger

just stomps the shit out of and it's not like all of its content and it's not and it's not like you know this game i don't like this game because it's old i actually really like super mario yeah i think it's good i know it holds up but it's direct contemporaries from the same company in all directions before and afterwards stomp it in all of them ff6 and chrono trigger ff5 ff5 they stomp it it's not even fucking close but people are their dicks are so hard over the idea of a mario rpg that they forget i would go and say there are better mario rpg that i would say there are more mario rpg i have no idea why chroma squad is coming out of me and if you haven't seen it or don't know what it is you should check it out like perhaps you guys you might like it it

looks pretty fun what's it launching on because i know they had a selection of platforms they wanted to work towards uh we'll have farm selection for people that have all platforms is important but i'm pretty sure it's a limited uh no one selection to launch the um here scholars maintain that the information was lost scholars are jerks um yeah okay well expected release is uh gonna be like steam april 30th and other platforms late 2015 okay that's pretty standard other included like mobile uh consoles uh fita not 3ds i think that was the whole the whole spread like they pretty much want to do everything in the future so pc for now okay and go check out those japanese ads if you haven't seen them yeah they're great they're great um yeah so that was that i just realized

we missed that oh you're totally right it was a good one we're gonna miss something every month man yeah um oh and hey i'm not interested in scholar of the first send because the durability bug remains yeah i believe you let everyone know that it's it's you can't fuck it and i i agree that like i didn't realize until like i saw the the fucking when you're going with 60 frames per second it gets twice as bad as it was when we were dealing with it and it's just like that's really awful that's that's a really shitty thing but whatever um it would be more exciting in a world where bloodborne didn't exist yeah yes much more much more if bloodborne were months off we'd we'd be playing i feel like the release dates were fucked up yeah what do you want to say like bloodborn

feels like it could have used another month in the oven and scholar of the first send is just buried in in like perception by bloodborne they should have slipped them they should have flipped them but yeah um so what's going on well for one thing bloodborne while we're talking about it tops the uh japanese sales charts uh with 152k sales in japan good just solid 87 percent of their stock their shipment for the first week even though it has a game breaking bug yeah that's crap that's crap oh that bug's really bad which one the which one indeed me and woolly will talk about this bug is it the key in four and a half weeks but is it is it the the key in it no the key's fixed i was gonna say it's the memory the memory oh yeah i know the one the the easy mode

memory easy operational which you might accidentally encounter so uh i know we mean you woolly we talk our thoughts about it uh in the in the lp but that'll go up in like what two weeks or something it's gonna take a while so i feel like we should tell people about this fucking bug because it's really bad it's the longer you play bloodborne the easier the game gets because the game starts to run out of memory and boss moves can't load in but to get a bit more precise it happens after leaving the game on for about 12 hours so if you play for yeah patterns they simplify to the point where they do just one attack so i think bloodborne requires a little nintendo notice saying maybe you should take a break yeah so basically if you play for absurd marathon sessions you're going to

notice the game's going to start getting really easy which i'm sure a bunch of the people listening to this do yes because you do people were coming out within three days of the games release going man this is an easy souls game i i'm i'm almost at the end of the game it's so easy and it's like oh my god you you played for 12 hours or left it on or whatever well and you're encountering bosses that have two out of like 30 moves and then the other bit with it is that this might actually still occur even if you do the suspense i have not figured out i'm not gonna find out if that's the case but it sounds but it sounds reasonable in which case it's like that's double bad because i've been abusing that no it's great it's great lucky us we avoid it during the lp because we

don't record for that well yeah i turn off and we turn it off but like still i don't think i hit it but like i would hate to yeah for sure yeah damn i mean no way to know for sure until like you realize yeah exactly that boss fight was not like that when you see new game plus time right i guess yeah uh no it was a fucking good week of sales for ps4 but it's not good but even with that blood board deserves it because it's awesome it deserves it absolutely and they will fix this i'm pretty sure like dark two launched to like 250k on ps3 but that's a much bigger install base much but it was really good for ps4 yeah the the sort art game was sort art didn't really really which one's this sort art lost song sold about the same on vita as it did last time but the ps3 skew was there to

perform the sales way higher it's nice to know that japan thinks bloodborne and sort art are pretty much the same thing to be fair as much as they can't tell the difference Matt the black swordsman versus the one he's got a trench quarter to show to be fair as much as we me and Liam and everyone on the internet deservedly give sort art it's transitioned to a game format is the most natural thing of course pretty buttery smooth yeah i know it makes perfect sense meanwhile did you scroll down that chart and look for this guy at five well you've got that came out are you serious you gotta go dig in beneath one piece pirate warriors three well that's not even fair of course that that's not fair

eventually this guy at five is down there at 22 000 dismo launch that's not good that's not good like not good stuff last of the molds you know at this day and age i honestly don't have any problems saying i don't have like any affection for niponichi software i gave up the American side of things because they're good while they localize shit and that's cool but like all their new stuff like the god in the fate paradox whatever that game's called i don't i don't like that this guy i don't like that and after that whole thing where they treated their employees like garbage and like they all fucking all the important guys left i did not know about that yeah that seems important why didn't we cover it in news what happens they all money issues basically and they

didn't pay us is that the money issue basically all the guys in charge of this guy i walked wow and they're making their new game with uh idea factory usually don't make great games but now they have there now they have these guys making a good-looking game so that's mckay shin trillion the one that i couldn't remember the other day uh was soul nomad soul nomad yeah i was a fucking world leader yeah that's i like their older stuff better like phantom brave i love world eater as a thing yeah and well this is just god it's like peace it's like it's like naming a gun the peacemaker yeah the world eater it's like oh that's probably super cool it'll never be able to accomplish its namesake never even you know that unless you're playing star ocean super dark

right like that game lives up to the name like go play that shit if you haven't um better than this guy but yeah i know uh after they spent so much to actually make this this guy look fucking gorgeous i got to sky fatigue like fucking eight years ago man yeah me too i've never beaten a single one it's just it's too grinding i got fatigued the money i know that's described the fact that you could go into an item world find another item and go into that world before even backing out of the first it's like that that appeals to a very specific level of that third item this game appeals to a very specific demographic in which this series is probably the best thing ever but like i want my my strategy rpgs to be more shining force and fft i want to be more concise

less less i still think fft has the best strategy rpg like level up system ever like the job system it's pretty good game jp up and all that fucking good shit super good and you know there's some people are like calling last for me because they want more and you're somebody that they're they're met 23 000 people want more yeah yeah no i guess you're right i feel like i'm gonna tell better america it's gonna do better and you wouldn't want somebody telling you like uh hey we're pulling min maxing out of this thing no exactly and that's and that's why i say like to the people who love this series like this it's probably the best thing it's it's probably exactly what they want and it's it's everything they want and it's the only thing that they want because the amount of time

you can dump into a fucking disguise game is limitless it's absolutely limitless yeah so i like the art style yeah no the art size the art's neat good and the tone is great i love the fucking old stupid goofy tone yeah but uh that pretty game was all right pretty uh i don't know about lives yeah there's a second one too and it's it's also really good uh but it's just like that's too much and like for a casual fan of that genre it's like too much too fast too like there's five games and like four mobile uh did you're forgetting disguise d2 okay which was which is a full disguise game just not uh not numbered like them uh in the meantime a bunch of shit shut down oh no yeah online shut down pour it out pour it out did anyone here ever use online i don't even know what it is

i use what you do i it's the guy what is it it's uh i used online is gai kai it's a streaming playing oh he's so mean dave perry is the head of something that failed shocker uh i i used it at work when i needed to for qa i played like all the free samples and shit and when they had the um gai or is it like any game it's online it's not gai kai but it's gai kai okay then gai kai shows up afterwards i was like no we can do it better than sony bought gai kai and then sony made gai kai kind of work and on live didn't catch you know so sony bought like a shitload of copyrights from on live after this like that was smart that was a good purchase by that and now i believe uh shinra industries is is that the name that's uh that's where it is there they're working on their own

version of that as well so it's not the last we're gonna see if streaming services no but oh eventually when the infrastructure supports it i have no doubt this will be the perfect way to do anything yeah but we're so far well from that moment i'm sure that in this day and age sony's works as well as it does like i tried to play station now i i played code veronica that was my test game because i know that game backwards and forwards and the knife trick at the beginning is the perfect test with this kind of thing and i was able to do it it was much harder than usual yeah but i was able to do it and the fact that that's even possible is astounding if we were if we had korean internet it would be perfect japanese and that means that we just have to

wait we're getting there we're getting this terrible future that we don't want we're in canada so we literally have the worst internet in the world so our internet is better than america have you spoken to plague of gripes anyone that yes but i don't live in deliverance okay i want everybody here's a thing a lot of people in the states do live in deliverance everyone out there that's got a comcast subscription i'm sorry like which is like one third of the united states let your voices be heard ten seconds late people are suffering man we're talking about gouging money we're talking about performance of the all of it all of it all of it because i always read the gouging in the money they pay for they pay for prices we get yeah we get bad gouging but our internet

quality is relatively it's acceptable yeah no the shittiest thing about bell and videotron is their service yeah exactly videotron service for me has been great but i don't doubt that one day it's going to go real bad and then i'm going to have to go back to bell who i hate so much come on google i hate them so much well you know there's there's the third parties i hate them so yeah you're ever gonna i and i'm enjoying i need i need i need i need tech support that i can actually call that needs first-class internet in any case um i would pay so they shut down i'm paying the highest amount of internet i can get right now the highest and it's still not enough so they're shutting down and for the next month everything's free uh as far as i understand before they before they close

everything off forever uh playstation home is shutting down and uh rather it did shut down i can't believe it lasted as long as this just in corpse is dead and uh this just in corpse that's walking around going woo for decades finally fell over and stopped moving corpse that's been chilling on the deck yeah eating burgers and and yeah burger whatever the fuck that was i don't whatever i remember but anyway um sony's own weekend at bernie's the thing with it the thing with it that uh was pretty funny was that there was a couple people that were like reporting on the final moments as it were i love that shit and and you would expect like a big hullabaloo crazy and you know there's a bunch of people standing around going goodbye goodbye goodbye that's

lame dude and then handing out hugs and then no one was really super into it it just it ended all this disappear i remember uh a matrix online and anarchy on line but both of those had like just fucking cataclysmic world ending in in universe events which was like morpheus got killed morpheus got killed as part of an in game event but it was it's just shit like okay guys the fucking the matrix they're tired of our shit they're gonna come after us just drop every fucking enemy in the universe into the zones and like fight an impossible battle for as long as you can and the anarchy online one was similar and i remember looking up the anarchy online one it's like you lasted for longer than it should have like players support servers stayed up an extra day

i'm probably wrong but the way i was interpreted it is that the servers like the the player base like made a decent go of it and final fantasy 14 original had this giant climactic battle that like you fucking apocalypse couldn't win and it was supposed to cut in the middle of the battle and that's what the story happened that old guy died yeah it's so nice to know when things never achieved what they shouldn't have to call it to say that playstation home went out whatever went out with a whimper would be an overstatement yeah i agree with that it's like there was some like it barely lived with a whimper man some people were completely some people were angry that they paid for couches that are gone yeah like i'd be angry that i was stupid enough to pay for a couch

in playstation home that there was some neat stuff in there like there was a house though what are you fucking implying yeah there was a there was a you want to play playstation home go to second life and watch the penises rain from the sky it's way better it was it was a find ralph puton find him there was a free version of ecochrome you could play in there and there was a 2d top-down wipeout and those were decent fun i said ecochrome fucker all right um and like the best thing about that was the haruka mask you could get from idol master that was just terrifying but other than that yeah those are the sound effects okay you know what's really cool when that thing that you want to happen turns out to do more than what you expected and become even better it's like the

opposite of us the lens of longinus has accidentally gone through the moon oh yeah so on so good well so on april fools day apparently uh assassin's creed chronicles trailer was dropped and not only does it show off the cool shit which i wanted which is assassin's creed china but it's also like here is the assassin's creed india and the story line you took direct from the fall so you took this in the total opposite way that i took this because by adding more of these cool things into the town loadable two and a half d game which is what i want more than a 3d game okay see i take that as like no i want to those setting all three any of those settings to be the next no actual game removed yeah no you know what you're saying what you're saying is

that you want to fucking go to kebec city or wherever the fuck victory takes place in the next game that's like one dinner no i don't give a shit no one here i'm saying that it doesn't matter what we wanted we saw if we just reuse as much assets from france as possible and just make that the next conflict game regardless exactly this is really weird the france looks so much like london the only way they would ever do any of the interesting settings that people expected them to do would be in a cheaper well guess what i'm out that i think that means i'm out i think they look great i'm super in and the textures moving off of like the the different well i just hope it's good because i'm watching the trailers and i still don't know is that going to be fun to play okay i saw there's

a 10 minute if it's fast prince of persia with some like similar or better combat well i'm fine okay because there's ten minutes in here and play like it looks pretty ten minutes of gameplay shown on stream rumor has it no i know i watched it it was of china and was it a real like human playing yeah there was a guy and he saw two it was some umisoft guy or someone well that's what i mean i don't want to you be so like i want to hear from oh but he's stuck so like yeah he's using the rope dart right and it's very the first thing i thought of is mark of the ninja awesome and then the one right the one part i go oh oh is that when the combat starts and it's probably the most stilted not great looking animation ever it's like way worse than prince of persia one where she's just

doing these can animations and they're just like you can see the animation transitioning to hit one hit two hit three it's super slow and i was like but then they go well i fucked up if you start doing combat in this game you fucked up and he's using the rope darts and he's constantly being seen by guys because their their vision cones much like uh you know like you remember how it was like darkness and then just illumination yeah in uh mark of the ninja it's like that and i'm like okay no this is really good and this is what i what what i like more stealth oriented very stealth oriented they're like you want to achieve the rank of shadow okay that's the rank you want to get for each one yeah and i'm like maybe the maybe the animation for combat is like a punishment because

it's so bad looking that they're trying to punish you like you shouldn't be combatting they only show that but you know that like how india and russia will all have subtly different art styles yeah man and you like different and that's what i was saying filter yeah you see the filters of like the different like drapes and things and like nicole nicole right uh leap of faith off the top of the fucking crumbling or whatever man like oh please please i saw some people complaining like wow way to way to way to bury shall the girl yeah i saw people saying that too come on she's just front and center come on not only that i work i can't remember about nicole life like you know i honestly think it was meant to just be show in the first place and i think so because

it got really quiet like as soon as they announced a 2d and like a couple screenshots and that was it it went dark yeah it just went dark and i'm like i'm like i also wonder i think they've probably at this point separated it from uh assassin's creed unity yeah i'd be willing to bet that it's gonna be a standalone project post and i mean it's like like i said it makes sense because uh why to throw in india and russia there because they're not going to build those full worlds those are very different forms of architecture and that's a long time to make that you say that you say that in like an expensive ways but that's actually really no okay yeah okay that promise of the series was a different place yeah and that's disappointing but i love me some good old 2d

shit like it looks great yeah i really hope it's gonna make a 2d run and jump shit it should say Prince of Persia on it by the way it's not ubi saw this climax studio as a piece of shatter memories and i'm getting soup and and and a bunch of other bad games but shattered memories they didn't know that's not killer instinct that's a different that's double that's double you like and i'm gonna go ahead and say that like if this is the only way if this is the only way to get the best settings and interesting whatever i'll take it yeah take it man take it i'd rather do wish they were ubi art you'd rather have nothing than something potentially good put that on your grave or potentially bad chisel that into your fucking rock said pat as he died because

they didn't have food that didn't have mayonnaise on it yeah i'll fucking starve before i eat this shit um so uh if any of you guys haven't played um a regular hunter x the psp remake yeah i sure haven't okay there was a what was i called here maverick hunter maverick hunter x that's correct i don't like it much i don't know fair just that's what's yeah i like no but if someone goes and looks for it they'll what are they gonna find out yeah that game's not as good as the original no it's not and that is a huge bummer but what was cool was the little uh 25 minute ovae day of sigma which is the hottest shit because jill prang wins just walking around being like i'm a cop yo you're like what you dirty cop chill penguin chill penguin core he has a squad that he leads

so super cool uh yeah if you guys haven't seen that it's really awesome but never but you never really had a great way to see it because you have to watch it on a psp screen so a really cool guy has uh ripped and upscaled that to 720p nice oh i thought this was like an actual capcom thing no they would never do something they would never do something i thought they were put on capcom you need yourself i didn't know it was like a fan thing that's way too cool what what company in the world is gonna rip psps but they put it back on square x they didn't rip nothing they ripped it out that's way too cool for them to do that yeah it's way too cool but uh yeah i don't want you to forget this cool thing i put a link to it check it out it's you know it's totally right the dude did

some compression magic and it looks good yeah it looks good i mean like negative compression or negative compression yeah but but again it's it was it was the psb uh for screen format is like fucking what like 544 by some no that's the vita the vita is 545 it's like 270 it's not great it's 575272 yeah like that yeah that sounds about right so it looks good in 720 i'm impressed check it out um also uh not killed but delayed for at least uh quantum break is pushed back to 2016 oh remedy delayed a game huh gotta gotta compete with zelda gotta gotta be there to defend the xbox when zelda comes out and the and the zelda netflix show thanks for having me you can come with me god damn it just stop just fucking stop now sam lake when it's sam lake that tells me i

believe him it's just like every time i know this news hit me really hard despite the fact that i'm not interested in quantum break at all it's just because it makes me think of like man the original version of alan wake was the coolest thing in the world it was so awesome it's it was deadly premonition but a good game yeah and they had to fucking delay it by like three years and tone it so far back yeah it will fucking level base shooter and what it's worth uh his sam's official statement is is look at me i'm doing the dive of the gun pose yeah look at my twitter asshole make that face make the face um when asked long when asked why he says polish that's awesome yeah what's running you're gonna say are you sure it was polish and not the polish because they live near

there that's such a lame joke they're not even from the country i'll fool and you should feel bad no you can't make me feel bad that's a good joke that's a good joke it's not it's terrible like from every aspect that's like well what do you mean it's like cd pro yaks making us look bad because that first 15 minutes of witcher three looks fucking amazing yeah and they do and they do back in a locker yeah anyway i'm pretty interested in quantum break just because it's like the time stop powers the redness man remedy is yeah remedy shoot bangs feel good because i want to see a dumb tv show no i don't know that little demo was interesting it's the really the like what i'm right it's just that the main hero is the most it is he's literally the most generic

main hero just like every remedy for allen allen wake and max pain are fucking kefka compared to this one you're right yeah uh yeah because quantum break isn't the game that would get me to buy the xbox one but i'd pick it up well that's what scale bounds for yeah that's a monster hunter game not shut up let me let me do it's not he's already said so much about let me do what it i think it's a little sad that you want platinum to follow someone's trend you already have a thing that's doing a thing yeah but it's always been a genre like passing come on the hunting genre yeah but not monster like i'm saying like that's like saying call duty's a genre yeah kind of is yeah you didn't help you're gonna make something in the league of legends genre

okay i won't be saying that you keep using worse examples and it makes something in the street fighter genre these are all things that exist nobody says that no but you have to you have to take the one last today i have to say the fatal fury i don't because nobody says you'll be all say button bashers yeah that's what i'm saying legal legends no let's let's recontextualize the conversation for no linguistic confusion what you were saying is that it's weird that you want platinum to make a clone in which people actually absolutely said i'm saying it's weird that you call it a monster hunter game because you actually want scale bound unless you'd rather monster under five instead of scale bound yeah okay sure just camea made it but

i mean then just call it a hunting game that's like you know it's like saying fine fine i miss button bashers there you go i want camea to make a button basher um he's got that huge he's got that union jack on his on his jacket when he was like 20 he probably knows all about button basher's is creeping back up into the back of my spine and then fucking making it laugh our commonwealth buddies are goofy speaking of creeping it's not even real they all said that we don't say that it's too late no that's what you're playing now speaking of creeping uh they just revealed a secret boss for crawl and it's none other than gabin himself yeah i saw that uh that's the five player game where one person's the hero four people are the enemies the dungeon crawler dungeon crawl and like the

four and whoever kills the hero gets to be the hero next round oh i see me like snake versus and middle gear online yeah somewhat but it's a random progressive things happening here's the question is it gabin or is it gabin well that's that's that's the thing is it's basically game new all let me let me find the game new all as a hidden boss in hatred uh where is it over here check this fucking gif out power hoof silly nerdy john this reads really well for the podcast i know i so that's a he does game new all does show you kids and then transforms and he gets his eyes and he gets his beard out all right all right all right right now that's that's what i'm like you're not bad it's nifty that's not bad that dude has a nice life collection did you hear yes yes he does

i was robbed live though also crawl this looks cool man looks pretty nifty yeah um that's going on the guys that made the retron five game console thing uh are making well they like it wasn't it was an april fools joke that people were like make it and they're like okay we'll make it it's the smart boy which is a gameboy color that you put your phone into your iphone into is the screen and it'll have buttons and work and respond and actually play i love that april fools joke is making game control good make sure to get this product before it's pulled off the market due to illegal shit being inside it right but they got the retron five out so they got it out which is also like basically illegal shit yeah it's like the whole the retron five is actually fine is the

the controller it shifts with it's unplayable no i thought there was some actual no the retron five is illegal there's a legal no no yeah sure i'm just talking about the quality of the machine and it's like the whole fucking point yeah retron five was that it was a legal emulation box and then it shifts and you you get it and like the news comes out whoops they accidentally broke a bunch of laws making this oh no bog with the shit controller thing you're thinking of the fc bro no no like i i looked at several reviews of the retron five okay actual hardware is really soft this controller is one of the worst controllers ever the only thing this device needed to do was not break the law yeah the only thing it existed to do the only thing i asked to do it

so it's worthless homer the only thing i asked you to do for this party is put on clothes and you didn't do it um well and like of course you know nintendo doing what they have to do there the other hand in hand piece and uses hey remember that mario 64 hd project that you shouldn't have talked about yeah guess what well it was always just going to be one level so it's not even that it's gonna blossom and there's something else do we know he literally said this is it this is done i'm not even need to finish actually describing the story no we're done yeah don't talk about it until it's already out on the torrent side no it was done it was done it was done no no no no it was it was a demo thing that was but he said he was only doing that one level

and he was it was no there's okay according to the story what got shut down was a preview and like unfinished one and he had more okay but he was only doing the one level i know he said that for sure but that's that's what it was so just you know the fact the moment we find that about it it's over the dream is dead all the fucking games we make is like mario 64 is not highly it cleans up real well in an emulator i'm not sure what the point of this is we we at kotaku asked nintendo for a comment on this and also reminded them to vote goku there you go um you know who's really strong goku he's gonna show you he's gonna fight frieza and get blue hair he's gonna help you find the way goku do you guys know that he's gonna get blue

hair and then frieza's coming back and whatever do blue hair hey what was your favorite what was your favorite apple fools uh stupid joke uh under night and berth exe yeah that was really strong under night and berthin i think it was called whatever it was called yeah the videos of that are the best this uh i'm also gonna give a big uh this is like three four years ago but it was virtual fighter five fucking whatever the fuck it was called where every character was doing fireballs this is it yeah that was great too i saw a really stupid one which is pretty similar to the under night and berthin when you're like damn to it yeah uh there's this horror side to go to called up lady disgusting and they have like oh yeah they have like a really good solid video game column

about any like horror video games and indie games whatever dlc for anything that's coming out and they when they had a story that after april first was done they would put a label on it saying this was april fools yeah so you wouldn't even have to click on it one of them says tons of we horror games getting remastered for hd systems like what the fuck does that mean you mean a bunch of publishers banded together they're like oh like hudson is back hudson was one of them the grudge like horror house simulate like what the fuck who would even click on that like oh it's just a bunch of publishers you like you know what we really need to get pulling back out wait wait i got one i got one i got one uh the bet my favorite april fools joke is how they're gonna sell fire emblem if in japan

oh wait that's real it's bullshit it's not great joke ever it's a right that shit is fucking garbage um i don't mind i don't mind pain it's enough for three campaigns whatever so i'm i'm gonna take it that not a fucking pokemon i'm guessing you probably missed super quiet i don't so super hot put out of a site and you can go download super quiet which is quake with super hot rules oh that's good it's fucking cool wait wait you play you play for real no but like there are multiple players anybody moving out of the bullets move or what when you move okay so it's not multiplayer it's not a single player single player yeah oh that was okay single player quake yeah okay but when you move the world moves when you don't move it's not like it's fucking great

i really expected multiplayer because the way they set it up is like they show you a video quake is multiplayer they show you a video of it and then they describe it and like to go through the whole gang and then at the end it's like download here no seriously download here that's fun and then you like wait what yeah and like no we made it we made it yeah so uh that was fun i like how square enix had the unfortunate luck of announcing a game on that day because their countdown thing ticked down that was dragon quest heroes you kind of doesn't care much about april fools i don't know yeah which was actually a bunch which was actually next on the docket because it's like dragon head quest heroes two is announced fucking immediately yeah the first

game came out five weeks prior guess what fucking dragon dragon quest two was announced to exist as soon as they signed the deal for dragon quest heroes one yeah why would anyone think that would nothing be like a huge success it's really soon and like this is like mo probably the quickest sequel in recent history is bafflingly but at the same time i'm so not averse to it because apparently it's a really good game so we have we all uh the three of us at least have a mutual friend who's like is is unfamiliar with how much pull we have in the video game industry who really really loves dragon and he goes can you get me a copy of dragon quest heroes i'm like no because this was before release yeah and i'm like no and he's like oh because i thought you're

a big youtube star i'm like yeah but like i know it's not out like i can't do anything and he already had the silver console that came with a free download yeah it was cute how he overestimates our ability to do anything the strings we're able to pull are short and few i like being told that i have lots of power that i don't have yeah as long as you don't ask us to act on it yeah speaking of power that you think you have but don't hey i get enough of that at home shut up uh guess who wants to make talk to alone what the fuck is that like i can't i can't even fucking get there i don't know what that is that would actually only really apply to me in dna or dina whatever dna want to make 25 mil a month off of the nintendo games deal i bet they

can do it which is almost like the sum of what their main ip made on its own for them at like is that world what uh i don't know i bet they can totally do it 25 mil a day a month a month a month that's yeah it's doable that sounds you think game of war is currently pulling in one day i was just gonna say and guess what when i went to my parents over the weekend and i kind of take care of my dad and stuff i'm watching tv you remember tv and there's like on every fucking channel there's a guy for game of war and kate upton's ginormous cleavage which is apparently the main character of the game so did you know did you know that big boobs are cool and make you want to do anything that they tell you to do so i don't look i somehow missed all of that until a million dollars yeah well because

we like yeah but that spot cost 80 million and then in the same conversation so in the same conversation in which like i was talking to pat about it i think i called it game of storm something like war it's not even the top grossing a class of plans is still number one yeah it beat box of plans for a very very short time and then they get to then they get the same dude it's not a brand new thing it's there after a long time i just assume because of this yes well that means the advertising is working because you didn't know it existed and now you do because all i notice is that kate upton's cleavage has a zip code and it's talking when are we talking to me what i don't know i don't know when the fuck are we gonna do it what when are we gonna oh we gotta wait we gotta wait

we have to be a month of it game of war came out in 2013 it's always on the edge of our conversation because it happens almost every every other podcast we talk about storm of dawn gate war now nothing nothing beats cry text one and no one remembered what was it i don't remember arena arena of fate no okay guys the last time we talked about this the last time we talked about uh and if you put dawn or gate or storm i'll store nobody remembers it right and i we were talking about the ea one which was dawn gate and then 10 minutes later i'm making the point that i just made and i start inventing new ones and then say dawn gates as an invention one and then you yell at me going we just talked about that on the podcast

that's the one that closed down and i didn't understand what you were talking about well here's the fucking thing we have to do a game show type format where one of us is a host it's gotta be jeffrey say it's gotta be like a jeffrey and you gotta go like is this made up or is this a real name of a real moba or moba like type game this published by someone this 2013 one was terrible there it is there it is there it is yeah that's the one i think that applies to demigod okay i don't know the 25 mil a day a day a month thing is like after playing final fantasy record keeper i kind of want to throw up hearing that news because you you don't make that kind of money without making gacha style distribution i'm surprised at how mild you guys are taking

it because that's fucking disgusting it sounds like the worst no it sounds almost any faith in these games i i did all my vomiting off camera last week it's the same thing to me as like when a company goes this is going to be the first of a trilogy fuck you yeah i've been rising to you when you talk about before yeah say automatically off the gate before your product's out before your product even has a visual representation you know this is going to be a massive success look at our big bonus i feel like the only people that i ever gave a free pass for that was bio-wear with mass effect because they had it they had a they had a sterling track record yeah and the whole point of that game was being able to carry your decisions forward and then look how that fucking turned out

so i think you're gonna catch land d by chapter 14 reo that was the one pass i never gave and that's why did it blow up in my fucking face that's a pass too 16 16 is a lot i i give it a pass i think i'm the only one that's like let's play shen mu so we can exclusively talk about how dumb bonehead and move that is shen mu online oh man the funniest saddest joke ever like because there's been there's been like assure of yourself then there's been fucking overconfident as far as i can tell no one ever actually worked on shen mu online at any point they got a company to make that video and let you know work ever started like i'm probably wrong but when i looked it up i was like wait no one's actually and and poor you couldn't tell the difference wait i've got like little mini

side story i was talking to you guys about terminator uh earlier because we're reading this terminator book and i'm too young to remember this but there was a terminator two judgment day teaser trailer that was just like uh an endoskeleton arm being to have flesh like you know superimposed over it and it shows arnold schwarz nager's face and he goes i'll be back and says terminator judgment day i don't remember that at all uh that was put out in theaters before james cameron had even known that that was an option to write the movie he was like a company got the rights got schwarz nager to do that made that footage especially for that trailer and not a single word had been written to a screenplay hey you know what that gives me a perfect segue into something that i don't know

is going to be on the docket but it is a god damn tragedy you know what you shouldn't much like smash bros or this you shouldn't announce projects before details are locked in and you've convinced the director to actually direct smash brothers is fine though because that e3 would have been terrible you guys heard about twin peaks yes of course yeah yeah yeah you know who's the saddest of all you're not sad i'm not sad you know who is sad swearing swearing it's just a setup to call them in as the ringer man it is unbelievable to be fair that they would have announced this almost a year ago without it actually without any of the details actually being lost and having the pretend like if they what happened what actually happened here the details weren't locked but they're

like we'll do anything we need to do yeah really quick then find you spoken a paragraph around the subject what actually happened thank you lou they offered uh david lynch a certain budget to film the new twin peaks uh nine episodes mini series nine episodes and he said that's not enough money to do the show the way i want to and they're like well we're not going to give you anymore and then david lynch says well fucking i'm gone sorry i'm gone yeah not the thing he's right and he starts calling up the actors to tell him sorry guys i'm out have fun with the project i think he said publicly like it may still continue yeah who cares yeah who gives a shit to be a hundred percent fair i think this is just a move to get people to get a backlash shoot every no not a shoot but this is a move to

pressure show time into going oh shit everyone's really pissed at us well i guess what it's working everyone's fucking furious i'm pissed hey fans we're we may or may not be working on an x-files thing but wouldn't it be cool if david the covney to be fucking like okay to be fair that the x-files thing is god is a complete walk and chris carter is writing everything and that's going to i know and it now it's locked in but the first thing they said you're right was hey hey wouldn't it be cool you guys should totally tweet at them and see if they want to get in on this it'd be awesome what they even do how they do it it's better than what they're doing with the new calibrations now but that's all over to done yeah it is done jay anerson is in real life because he actually

was a sex yeah that's why would you rather that or the guardian code because x-files is done x-files had an nd isn't it and it was terrible is a terrible sure that whole fucking way the premise of that question implies it also didn't happen oh yeah of course it's really unfortunate that reboot had no ending and never ended and will never end and will never end yeah because it has non-canon fan fiction that will be internalized yes because that happened i bet you the release some barbie movie where she has like she has like a really internalization fan fiction is why reboot will never we haven't invented the level three stonewall because sandbagging is level one stonewalling is level level two we haven't hit level three yet but i'm getting

real bunkering not bunker bunker i'm getting bunker bunkering well dig a hole jump yourself in and just wait i'm just buried above you just buried above you just bury yourself sandbag yourself so so reboot never ended and the comic will be read all right all right you got it out there oh i actually read a comic book uh over the yeah i read the mortal combat x uh stuff um that is they do a really smart thing in that come in that prequel comic series and then they have to kill off anybody you hate they have the new characters kill off the lame deception character yeah the very first thing that happens is a scorpion punches through su house head you didn't see how specifically that's good you didn't see the other time then the bottle gets cut in half i know like so well sounds like

good stuff someone also like fucking punches someone's like a heart out i think it happens a lot in that comic book when that's all done i want to read that guess what's in that the commie dogu i bet it is it's all over it's great it's all over the game it's straight up the crux of the plot there's a shot of it being thrown to the camera in slow motion no that's not the best mcguffin of any fighting game ever that's the shinok amulet that's not the comic the commie hot dogu we know too much about the commie dogu why'd you put the keys up on the table oh man that why'd you put the keys on the table that's trailer straight up looks like something matt made because it is unworkable brother you want to talk about matt combat fucking system of a down starts playing

over that final trailer and i lost it i never used system of the down for any music video but you would have went up if i could have in a heartbeat but i'm not sure if you saw my tumblr post basically like it makes the part wait sorry shut up shut up because it's such a willy b thing is that like on on twitter of course i'm capped with how much things i wanted to say because i have a lot to fucking say about it but on tumblr i go okay here's the thing it's like when you make a music video right and it goes from regular music video like oh no just sink up the punches to the beats in the sauce now you're a music video man yeah exactly and the moment that it truly became matt combat was that it's like i don't think you trust cut in cut my cut so fresh as suicide oh my god

this is all i what angels deserve to oh god i fucking marked out of course i'm sure of course you did i've marked out on your behalf to be fair that was very similar to me like that's the mortal comet version of the street fighter four uh not the not asa what was that the trailer the one that was like nineties and they played it during mma oh yeah the original mma but it had a had a music god i figured what the fucking band was was a popular nineties but the body's at the floor or whatever no i forget to but i know which one you're talking about yeah but that one and like i i i think i think let the bodies at the floor would have actually been more appropriate and worse and dumber but also what the fuck with that luke hang fatality that was fucking sick

that one was nuts oh yeah you know what i watched the i jen's first half hour of that fucking game i did too that game's gonna be fucking sick yeah is it game out tomorrow no it's out tomorrow next week fuck i was real this morning tomorrow you mean today yes this morning i yesterday morning i was like man i really hope that that tomorrow i'm really jonesing to play mkx i talked about this like three weeks ago before bloodborne came out launched trailers that don't come out the day before the game comes out our shit because they fool you they made me if you want it too early because they come out on mondays usually or the weekend and i'm like oh it's coming out this no it's fucking not fuck me yeah it sucks the amount of impulse purchases that could have happened i was

sad because the it has a shot of cotel con getting kicked like a loser oh yeah dude but i'm like okay guy he's good that's super weird they paint him more like i'm the savior of outworld oh he's he's like pretty okay i'm not i'm not the next show con i'm actually and well still mean in one of the issues he unrepentantly utterly kicks the goddamn shit out of goro yeah the girls like i'm so shamed go to compete the shit out of me and goro goes to like his king dad and goro king dad i assume everything especially when mortal combat combat against the city animated like prequel to the movie i assume all show cons are like oh you lost oh that's really bad i'll kill you because you that's what cotel con thought yeah and he goes i was counting on goro's dad to fucking kill the

shit out of goro for being such a fucking yelling i forgot about i forgot that all dads love their sons and the dad hugs goro and goro's got no arms because cotel kicked his ass that bad and and he's like don't worry about a kid and then he cuts to a shot of like we have trouble the whole show con race you see all the warriors that was not the expected result in me at all frieza yeah frieza's dad it's it's really awesome i'm not sure you guys saw but like in the trailer specifically they showed a lot of that one stage i'm like oh my god this is one of the coolest stage in fighting games not because it's like super like complex or whatever it's just like kind of barren like sand place with some like modelists here and there but they're in the middle

of building the cotel con shrine yeah that's the one that's so cool no no no that's that's the um that's the like kind of there's two stages they look very very similar there's more blanche is the one with like the sabertooth liar and like the market this is one where they're building cotel con uh sphinxes in the background and everyone's getting hype for cotel con god he's cool pretty good um something that i was excited to read uh this week was the confirmation from loren lining the loren lining that the thing that you and i talked about a while ago liam uh that was rumored for a bit is actually it was more concrete than we thought they were planning to totally give away the original xbox yeah as a free system and then have like possible subs or

whatever like who knows how far that planning went but the fact that loren lining would come out say that that was what got him in and they want it and they wanted loren lining is a pretty big enough name and they wanted to get on world as the uh mario of that yeah you know platform that's a super interesting like way to do that yeah that's not going to happen no for like 20 years but i can but and they actually did experiment by having 360s for 100 bucks where you had to do us two years with live hey i remember that uh for but uh yeah the bit they got me was when loren lining said like something along the lines it was a no-brainer like of course we'd go with the winner like if they're giving him out for free no no shit they're gonna win yeah exactly but of course that didn't

pan out would you guys do that but it was really interesting if i give away a console no no i mean would you buy that a con like a decent console that like with a subscription do i try everything absolutely i do we're at a point in our life that we're gonna buy all eventually but i take that ultimately it would you know if there were literally zero exclusive games for it no yeah but there but if there was one that looked decent yeah of course of course i'm gonna go it wouldn't stop me from getting the other one but of course and we and we've never seen it on like we've seen it in the experimental phase but we've never seen it on such a large massive scale yeah so we don't know if it could blow up who knows how far the phantom could have gone infinium do we all have

a phantom delivered free to our hearts i still want some product ever get that optimist keyboard no because it only came out in uh minor form it only came out as the mini keyboard but isn't it like a like ten thousand dollars or some shit if that's stupid the only keyboard like it was expensive but it wasn't that much the only keyboard worth ten thousand dollars is ant farm keyboard yeah that's pretty cool alien ant farm no just an ant farm keyboard an ant farm at keyboard both of us alien ant farm keyboard no because then there's only one good keyboard the one song and like but it lights up when you press the buttons and then plays a better cover sweet criminal yeah um there's like there's a pretty cool game called uh please don't touch

anything or it seems to be yeah i heard about this i don't know i don't know but i saw the trailer and i'm like this is curious and it's and it seems to be a papers please crossed with uh stanley parable style thing where oh that's a good fucking combo where you basically it's also really pretentious sounding combo and it's like here is a button here is a picture window of a city yeah i don't know don't hit it and then what whenever you're not doing things your character has an inner monologue narrative of like what he's thinking about of like the things on the screen so yeah that's very good that might be something interesting or not i don't know that's a lot like that scenario that i talked about like a few weeks back or once once and

worse it says like the government should just be one man inside a small room with a you are so in love with this joke it's because it's so good and it's just that button nukes everything yeah that's what the government should be um i love that one and our last story is gonna segue us into oh we're not gonna talk about any of the nintendo direct stuff i guess yeah there's not much there's not much to say there i mean we already got it i wanted to talk about fire i'm the only the only thing to say that that wasn't the way they're selling it i think is super lame but the fact that they're calling it if makes me so i love that there's three campaigns i think that's the best i also think that's the best i don't think that selling it like fucking pokemon is that doesn't

bother me that okay you know what's a big success pokemon you know what you know what i my initial reaction to that is like fuck that i will reserve actual judgment until we see what that actually entails but you know what was barely the sixth first missions are are that's the only are the same did you like and then it's a completely different game yeah the whole game so if that's like four more hours gross no if that's a full fire emblem i think sacred stones is the shortest fire animal i think and it's like 22 yeah extra then i'll reserve judgment but the fact that it's called if man the fact that it's called if you know what smt if is it's smt if right okuzanoha won his own games and and prevents the icbm catastrophe oh that's those cultural realities

is the precursor to persona one right okay right it's it's the same timeline as smt one but the icbm catastrophe doesn't happen so what the fuck is fire emblem if is it is it like what if marth was never born like this is like if you choose that path of this path oh shut up it seems pretty different or so much of you how you felt when like starcraft 2 announced we're gonna have three separate campaigns and they're gonna be like whatever but that has huge months or years between campaigns dude the third campaign isn't even out i know like i feel like that's different they were just getting to the second of that you just that was announcing a trilogy on day one yeah that is i'm not saying it's the same thing you know what that reminds me i i was like that's bullshit

because starcraft one came with three campaigns yeah starcraft brood war came with another three campaigns yeah yeah um you just said like i don't want to play as the humans or the zerk you don't play the protoss campaign and guess what it's like six years later and i still have my campaign you just said pokemon sells but you know it doesn't sell loony tombs collect them all bugs bunny adventure are they're gonna say lunatics no no no like i thought you were gonna say spider and the eight other games that had red and blue versions robo spawn and white versions demikids robo pawn uh i'm sorry i only looked i only looked at the fucking neogaf topic for it for uh fire emblem across whatever snt and it seems like at least in neogaf topic people are pissed

that it's not fire emblem or smt they're like oh it's just so here's here's here's the breakdown it's just like it's not what i wanted it's not what i wanted i was i think it's more interesting as neither a fan here's the explicit breakdown of where this sentiment comes from in the initial trailer in which nothing was shown except artwork four pieces of art they showed main characters from both series standing next to each other as if as if they were pairs so people thought that it was gonna be like that pokemon nobunaga's ambition yeah in which fuck it they're literally just for no reason it's they're just gonna stand next to each other like an amko x cap and amko x capcom or something yeah and then this ends up being like a totally

original thing that is meshing the styles and maybe some of the characters but mostly the styles and some new characters right and people said no i wanted marth and demi fiend hanging out going on adventures but and while the current version to us is so much more interesting than that i can still appreciate yeah the the the ridiculous like just character swap over okay that being said smt main characters suck and are boring and would have made a terrible mix i think what they're delivering looks way more interesting absolutely i think but guess what smt main characters don't fucking speak but pat some of that sentiment some of that sentiment was also like i noticed what i was saying which is this is way too anime from what i expected yeah i really want me to

you know and and and so the music for one thing you know but i'm super glad that it's a wild totally super weird anime for fire emblem too like it's totally its own thing it is and that's why i'm excited i love that it's its own thing but you could have told me this game was poop poop mcpoop cropping the triple h experience and i would have bought 60 copies of the triple h experience i'd buy that it's it's cranking up or pretend to keep it up all fucking stuff it's cranking up a knob how far can i shove my nose in what did you just say i said pretend to keep it up all fucking stuff mcman triple h stephanie mcman because he's really okay mcmayhawns he's just really thinking about his own nose so liam what what the deal is he's thinking about the

tornado yeah there you go there you go uh it's cranking up a knob that like makes you go yeah it makes me go well but like let's look at smt spin-off games right demikids persona every smt spin-off yes every smt spin-off is anime as fuck but here's a selection i didn't say that fucking devil survivor and and um and digital devil art anime as fuck in a different way yeah i was gonna say it's just like what you just said there it makes you think of like when uh dark souls or souls games coming out and maybe you still sort of think of it it's like ah the the summer design is you know not doing much for me because it's kind of basic but then when something is too anime like and i know what you mean because i feel like that too sometimes

so this is a little too much hold on this way and i i'm i i can i can finish your thought yes please to liam as uh a fire emblem if is to fire emblem what bloodborne is to dark souls for you once was once but but but you know that feeling yeah yeah yeah and if you fire them a smt because fire emblems more normal than sure yeah but i mean but i said way bigger jumps sure yeah like awakening like i said in the thing awakening in general has like a this really just clean japanese fantasy thing that like you get from no feet you get from yeah dude the fact that they have feet in this game that's what really matters like no but i mean like like wake up people um spiked princess or like lodos war style you know things and i'm just

this is awesome and like remember in the direct when liam was like blowing out his pants with his penis just cute you and we were all just like it looks good and he couldn't articulate it and all i could come up with is that it looks anime as fuck and that's why he's like freaking out like the only other game that's not bad i'm just like no that's that's the description here is that it's anime as fuck and some people really like that i kind of think there's something about that like like high fidelity really good looking anime as fuck but like also isn't like schlock yeah like not sordar like one of the hardest balances ever yeah like this uh digimon story cyber sleuth and persona five i think hit it really hard you know what here's here's the thing it's not schlock

yet but that music was just a fucking jpop if you what's wrong with jpop i it's just so you don't get to be ashamed of it because you don't understand the lyrics and how empty they are this genre is just it's just default it's bonus juice save us you know you said vanilla doesn't exist right as a flavor no that's what it is this is a different country's vanilla so it's it's so it's weird so it's weird to you yeah it's weird though shut up um with nintendo we've been eating it for a while with nintendo direct stuff there's nothing else to really say that we didn't cover in the first star fox the only the only we already said that i know the only thing that happened was nintendo commenting and saying hey we can take anybody from any video game

we've like now that's been confirmed and de-confirmed and confirmed again over they know they re clarified it you can vote on anyone from any video they reserve the right to do whatever they want and kudos to phil spencer for getting out there yeah like yeah i think it would be really cool with banjo-zooie god that was and first i was like what what is he high i don't like how can that ever happen he has the ability to make it happen but then he really hurts remember we worked with nintendo on some rare ip's on the i've been i've been thinking about diddy kong racing ds and and viva piñata i've been thinking about that move set since melee they have microsoft on the front of the box phil spencer they're fucking put jago in there phil spencer that's b is the bird

split the bird the bird reach right oh just like uh duck hunt dog yeah not new neutral be it'll be a clone of duck hunt neutral be is oh that's the lazy thing that's what they're gonna do neutral be is the kazooie they're not gonna put a poke from above his head you press down be it switches over so you get you switch uh from banjo to kazooie and you gotta slightly move anything the tough partner here would be nintendo and not microsoft yeah maybe like well oh and also i don't know if we ever talked about it on air but i don't know if it even counts as news but kanami stopped pulling kajima's name off shit and put it back yeah because they were getting so much bad press the bad press was unknowable no wait it totally was dipshit so i'm glad they're doing it yes good

took them a while but then you know what they should do you start up phantom pain it's just the biggest like size 80 text uh it's scroll letter by letter and it's and it's overscanning your television yeah it's like it's going too much the other one no it's the only way to bring it back it's a permanent watermark oh that's way better that's way better uh there was a four no four there's a 45 hour turn in hearthstone that broke a world record i don't know if you saw that or how does that even work i don't but it's a dude there's a time limit yeah he he casts a spell and then has buffs on the spell that shoot missiles out for 45 hours what a hero that's some shit that i thought you might know about and be able to explain where he was playing against himself

wow what no he was just trying to create the turn you're just trying to create the turn i don't get it just to break the record you know and then who knows i hate the deck building wall in hearthstone and was like i don't know i hate deck building i'm done oh is that why you tapped out yeah that's exactly why i tapped out it's just like well what i don't like deck building i know it's too much like a bug half the game no but it's the half of the game i don't like when i was playing hearthstone with with pre-made decks or decks that i read about online i was able to play it like an action game that used cards but as soon as i had to build a deck that's a puzzle game and i'm out so the only thing i was able to understand is like he has these missile cards and then he has a thing

that doubles them yeah i know that and then has another thing that like stacks the damage so that yeah no no that's that's not necessarily unique to hearthstone that's just like any any like you remember when i talked about playing boulderskate 2 and i would have characters that had boots on that would cast haste on that character but then if i cast haste on them again it would quadruple the effect right right in certain games if you don't have a system for stopping that kind of abuse you can stack multiple kind of buffs on yourself in magic there's a million decks about summoning a bazillion elves by just infinitely repeating stuff until you get to the point where you say to the enemy okay i have over a billion now and it keeps going like in morrowind apparently

if you make potions you can give yourself xp and then raise your intelligence which gives you more xp and just continue that process until you can walk up to a person in the first town and end the game yeah but that's not an automated process no that's what's impressive about this is he made the the whatchamant machine what are those machines called rude goldberg machine yeah i would say make a compression algorithm out of cards if your buff card is a multiplier a lot of you know what i mean then that's that's again you exponents and shit like that anyway um if you no i don't want if you have any idea where the image epoch ceo is you can send this i really hope he's okay of course besides that i know but like that statement was of course you do

it's of course you do yeah like humans want i thought you were i thought you were pinpointing me no i mean who the fuck doesn't want this guy to be found safe but the thing is every fun of every detail about it seems to indicate that like he's missing from the business from life he may well be he may well be baiting stuff and that's he's okay right because that's something like if it was like he's missing and the police are looking for him that's one thing but it's not that it's he's missing from our business meetings he's not answering anything and when we went to their office there was no one there and they moved and it still has nowhere they they're gone but that's what i mean is like their logo is still there but there's no one inside so

it's like that is like business evasiveness not missing person which is why i go i don't know if that's what the case actually is then like what the fuck he's dodging some shit well i didn't hear that he was like available to talk to no that's not what that's not what it is but i'm saying that the fact that there's like missing they're like the people the entire business was gone there said what does that mean it's not as far as i understand the only info we have is business man can't get in talk and contact with him and i never heard anything like he's okay okay the other like i haven't his family hasn't come out and said he's he's here the other the other stuff with the story is uh again going down to the office they got like an empty room that seems to indicate

that everyone just picked up and disappeared right so there's other employees there and it's just really mysterious they shut down i find that they have contrasting facts on a given story and none of them neither of them can so since none of them in this podcast all i do and since none of us can figure it out because we don't have enough information if you have the information send it to superbestfriendcast at gmail.com not to do another like metal gear thing liam but all i i read the story before we do it put it down here and tell you what i read sure so if you have other info that's your reading stories i know what the fuck i thought you were just pulling these off from memory if you guys know in real about that was my favorite aspect of compliment i have

ever read my entire life that was my fucking favorite which one just like man lees like so fucking on the ball every podcast how does he remember all of these all of these fucking news stories it's amazing and you're just like i i told you about that you're just man i wish he's a news reading machine folks i'm rain man i'm coordinating the shit yeah uh anyway letter time that's super best friendcast at gmail.com that's super best friendcast at gmail.com if you fuck it up we won't get it someone else will get it and they'll probably let me know that they got it yeah so try not to fuck it up try not we're they're heroes okay so uh they are heroes we are gonna take one uh you know we take one from a lot of people at the same time sure a lot of people

want to know if you're going to play the evil within dlc no great we're playing revelations now and it's so much better and it's basically the same game but so much better and then after that we're going to play even better games or way worse no it's better for a little while okay yeah we got to cleanse it awesome um we got one from jenny and jenny wants to know uh if you had the opportunity to do the free the fusion dance with someone on the planet who would oh god that is the best question we've ever gotten okay the dance that leaves after half an hour who would you do the fusion dance with so it's not permanent it's just for fun it's temporary yeah but you're super powerful if it was the earrings that'd be another thing the earrings are fucking okay the earrings are

so overpowered okay two two two the earrings you do the dance with the earrings are so overpowered they had to be destroyed immediately after their first no i don't do the earrings so the story didn't break the temporary fusion is less hyped than permanent fusion no but earrings you have to trick someone but you know when you both need to be on the same level would you know so i got up that's the question i agree for me it would be michael jai white yeah oh god to become shin woolly i need michael jai white's body and brain and fighting ability and history and fucking everything black dynamite that's that's done and done michael michael fastbender i just want to be in him technically i don't count i don't count louis ck it would just be louis ck and go to a i need

i am seriously struggling because i've never found it appealing fusing with somebody yeah i've never found it appealing so i'm seriously it's like it only works in a like there's no actual tangible benefit other than you get to read that person's mind completely yeah um and like you don't want to be like we're not in a goddamn world we're really gonna have to fight monsters what's in there like potatoes also even if we work even if we like i get in there it would just be even if we were in a dbz world our power levels are one and two tops who the fuck are we gonna fuse with it'll make a difference but then this then then we go down the hole of going where we break it down too much no you're just super powerful it doesn't matter like our actual no but the you're powerful after the

fusion because everyone who does a fusion dbz is already super powerful it's a multiplication effect you become multiplied by whoever you have to pretend that we're all yam chai or tn unless you fuck the figure yams is dead man great weaker than yam chai ever was unless you fuck up the fingers or you get fat or skinny yeah don't do that no i'm not no i'm not michael jarwhite i don't want to do it you can't not do it you have to do it it's a question you have to do it okay you know what random skeleton you know skeletons can't skeleton can't dance you can prop it up the strings nobody it's not live man i can't do it oh damn it i want it like because i want to be half skeleton like that's like you are half skeletons did you did you know that when you eat the skeletons

basically doing it for you who uh i don't know that was Miyazaki the fucking director of the blood form yeah it says everything uh i don't know man yeah uh my dad i don't know my dad's cool do i get do i get all the abilities he had in his youth after i come out of it what a shit answer congratulations like i don't know like but you can do the fusion dance slightly off and you'll become like a shittier version that's right that's right so you hope that you both do the no wait a second wait a second we forgot a detail about the fusion dance yeah you have to do a fusion dance with somebody of roughly your body type and height true or it doesn't work wait what the fucking how does fucking Vegeta and Goku do it when he's like two feet shorter they use the earrings

and then no no gojira gojira they did the dance they did the dance are they not similar in in bit like not just Vegeta shorter than Goku yeah buddy yeah but me dude i'm like the fucking five feet shorter than everyone get vern treuer that's good that's good peter dinklage yeah oh you know what yeah okay okay i would love to defuse it peter dinklage for fucking 30 minutes how did you become the coolest little guy in the world how that's how oh well okay i'm gonna i'm gonna use that uh we'll flow 500 wants to know uh what doki doki means i'm pretty sure it's the onomatopoeia for poking something soft no it's the heartbeat it's a heartbeat so yeah all right your heart goes doki doki right here right that's why doki doki panic is like oh shit i'm gonna talk

what a great game and doki doki magic shimpan means my heart is beating because i'm touching these underage girls yeah that's right said uh no s and k said it funds your god damn but king of fighters king of fighters pachinko machine uh yeah it doesn't fund kof 13 it funds the pachinko machine every one of those realistic wild wolf terry fucking textures were paid for by which yeah you tried to use against me but now it hurts you because now it's way worse all right all right alex has a remix on the uh own work for a burnt burned down thing oh wait it's gonna last a minute so we stopped doing this because we they became too easy they became too easy and boring like laugh okay people stop they stopped being interesting so three b's all right so here's

so these these games have to come out okay okay okay this is already these games have to come out as described okay one of them is a perfect 10 on 10 okay the other one oh wait in your opinion he's saying no no it's objective some magic objective magic objective one of them's oak green of time at release perfect 10 on 10 the other one is a garbage two on 10 yeah and one is announced but never released a zero okay in theory okay wait wait a zero quality game in theory or never no it never released never released so it can't have it's a question mark out of 10 it's a schedule online out of 10 yeah all right the first game is a megaman character action game by platinum okay that's strong at all the second game is a witcher game in the genre of wolf among us life

is strange etc that already exists and the third game is a metal gear game where you play as the boss during world war two i put the witcher is unreleased uh no the witcher is unreleased i put even though that boss 10 boss 10 boss 10 witcher unreleased and then mega man because that already sounds weird no i'm gonna flip that i'm gonna put mega man never coming out i'm gonna put the witcher one being garbage i'd rather a bad witcher game than a terrible mega man game because if a terrible mega man game came out he would be actually dead guys there is a there's a witcher phone companion game for witcher two that is not this but it's kind of there just just the dating or something no it's it's like a motion it's a it's a motion

comic with like weird children adventure elements so it kind of already exists and bad mega man games already exist as well oh boy 21 came out now another bad one came out then the fuck hey you know i also also wanted to deliver a bomb would be such a blow to them oh you're right you're right yeah i had the witcher game between okay yeah yeah but everyone can agree yeah the boss yeah fucking eight months pregnant baby bump sneaking action on the beaches in Normandy yeah the boss get up i'm fucking pregnant give me a break i'm dilating i'm eating rations for two i'm not the joy right now uh shan says you have the choice to be that's pretty good shan says you're locked up in a jail side a jail cell room for 24 hours you're surrounded with what will you do

you have walls with no windows or any form of entertainment and you have to choose who to be locked up in there with you one what are the ops oh no we're getting us plague yeah two james small three stamper uh plague easy plague for me for me that's an easy james small because i've already done that yeah back when we worked in qa we'd have you have to rock it down you have the cold room where we just sit there and talk about samurai showdown and she already did this thing they're done that i can't go with stamper because i'm afraid he'll kill me i can't go with james because i know i'll kill him but plague and i i think we can coexist no i go with none of us plague killing you within the first five minutes and harvest your organs for none of us have met

plague in real life so he might be catfishing us this might be in a way or she might who knows i'm willing to take that i said stamper because stamper makes me like he's effortlessly funny i don't really know much the time would go by so fast plague is hilarious too you're totally right but i'm afraid there's a limit on that before he has to like do whatever eldritch ritual he has to do and you don't want to be you're saying that as if plague wouldn't i take the chance with him i talked to plague a lot he's got downtime where he's lame he sends me no computer doesn't work it's sure but i can i can confirm that stamper and james smaller human beings because i've met them i don't know what's going on yeah plague could just be a big zord on you don't know

it might be an elaborate ai it's fucking it's out there but i mean you've seen the fucking patreon live action thing he is a big zord on head it's true i've also seen a little girl beat a bunch of smash brothers players that was fake dude that's the point yeah yeah yeah yeah see as a stamper and plague and james would be like kind of tied in a second because i could probably like be entertained like we could probably entertain like like you know we give james guff sometimes but he's still funny you know if i bet if plague tried to kill me i could i could distract him by saying that i like feast or famine defensive systems which he replied to saying that he kind of didn't even mind that much should check that out but why'd he bitch all right to me about

five hours he gave some reasons but anyway plague sent me a picture of superman shooting a bunch of superman baby clones out of his head and i go where'd you get this and he's like i just found it and i'll randomly say hey here's a spider and just fucking throw spider pictures at me and it says yeah you're gonna change it to to fucking to fucking stand up there you go and it says hey was i about to last week on the podcast uh hunter x hunter was brought up and you mentioned it months before i tried with the questions yeah let me get there all right yeah go on go on let me get there i'm sad um so uh i was curious enough to she's curious enough to start it and long story short ended up watching 37 episodes

kept watching but felt absolutely nothing for it didn't love didn't hate no intense emotion at all just mad but i was compelled to keep clicking yeah despite my feelings that makes no sense i'd been clear on what happens despite feelings i've been clear on after about five episodes or so what is the longest you've kept watching reading playing something that just didn't interest you sorry what compelled you to keep a very good question thank you just let me finish so for me i feel like my obvious answer here is love henna i've watched all of it i've watched isn't that like 500 episodes no no no it's it's a it's a full season i'm thinking arama i'm thinking arama it's a full season plus uh some movie ova type things and i just went through all of it i felt nothing

but i couldn't stop and i don't know why you're actually so right like i kind of totally i'm trying to think of another one but love henna is a strong contender at very least uh 40 you just digest everything you just watch the and you're like and you're like yeah this girl got her that girl got her episodes and that's we're moving i have uh all right i have my life is not any better or any worse yeah i just can shoot some bread i have two one is the first 49 episodes of one piece which are terrible are fucking awful they are they're shit and then it gets good at like exactly at 50 which is way too much for somebody to watch it's way too much to know but i want stabs i want some faces cool i want something with these uh eight eight four nine seasons of gordon ramsey's

show where he goes around to uh like fix people's kitchens not even off of tv like you downloaded and watched i acquired uh yeah i forget what the show is called that's how much was in hell's kitchen no it's not hell's kitchen it's where he it's like where he goes kitchen it's the the reality where he shut up shut up where he goes to to to different like restaurants oh kitchen nightmarish yeah yeah kitchen nightmarish yeah i do i watch the whole thing i watched the entire run of the british show which is like three or four seasons and then was like and then watched like five more of the american one and then the american one burned me out because like season five is where it actually starts to become like the same show every single show but it's pretty good uh and

there's there's one maybe two good moments per episode where the kitchen's filthy and gordon's like people are going to die if they eat in this kitchen what the fuck is wrong with you it's like a fuck it's a 45 minute show it's it's not 20 minutes i know the latter 20 minutes of every episode is just fluff and uh i watched like eight or nine total seasons of it and a friend of mine who went to cooking school and knows all about cooking and i remember i am a person that had to be taught how to make spaghetti like a couple months ago by my girlfriend and i then forgot how to make it yeah that's spaghetti but the instructions are in front of me water anyway uh and i i'm telling

him it's like yeah so i watch he's like why are you watching a fucking show about chefs and cooking and shit and i'm like i don't know i don't know i feel nothing i don't care about cooking i don't know how to cook i'm watching other people cook badly but it's way better than i could cook i don't get it and yeah way too much i have no idea why i wasn't like in a bad mood i wasn't like it like it was just nothing better to do this was the last year there's other stuff that you would love more that you i didn't i didn't feel like it it's weird it's weird i don't know i have no good reason to have done this and yet did so much of it i usually when i watch a show it's like i watch two episodes and i'm like i'm done and then someone needs to tell me no good pass

this episode then i'll go back and try but uh one that i'm just like i think i i know why is that i watched maybe like 20 episodes of helsing and helsing itself the show there's not them it's uh wait wait ultimate or the original i think the original okay because uh yeah i'm pretty sure it's i watched a bunch or whatever i got to a certain point i'm like this show is fine i hate the design of fucking alucard so much okay he looks like a huge dork and i hate his grin and everything about him but the show is fine and it balanced it out to i don't really care did you guys know that uh if you look at helsing's design alucard's design that uh the little dots on his glasses where the rims meet looks like little tiny eyeball a little pupils yeah wow and it makes

it look like he's got googly eyes the whole time it's really silly now go back and watch helsing and have it ruined but i like i like helsing yeah i recently saw a picture of police girl biting a dude's hand off and i'm like maybe i should watch maybe i should watch helsing anderson anyway i don't know yeah the equivalent of of of helsing who is good spoiler alert what the equivalent of his power level but in just holy power oh the dude with the knives yes yeah i've seen i watched some am v's in my youth there you go i'm mad no i never i was never i bet i had come you might have played this one uh the legendary star fee oh yeah and that's star fee a little bit the ds one that we got because i played that cover to cover to cover and

nothing nothing nothing just that is the where i easy i defeated the legend of star fee now to go eat gruel yeah exactly all right okay uh hey uh dude uh 1532 wants to know which one of crueger's inventions do you want to be real oh my god that's so is it the ghost waifu or the cyborg shit i'm going with neither oh wow because those are the first two the pop in my head taser gauntlets hashtag game changer so what i've now learned i need to catch up with arch i want the ghost waifu because then burt reynolds taser gauntlets are dumb man they would shock your hands shut your mouth you can get shot they're so good they're so good a real taser would hit you from across the room hashtag game changer that's where it came from

no you know why you know why he wants the taser gauntlets it's hidden the viewer or the listener can't hear it but as he was saying hashtag taser gauntlets woolly had pointed both of his fists in front of his chest and was banging them together like god damn chogengiger and lager or archer and lager or man with the iron fist or anything you have he wants to do the slow pull back of the fists as electricity arcs between his hands as the taser bits stuck on each other in the and then do a fucking distorted real impact on something no no no if you had such a weapon you just hope that just clanging them together is enough to scare anyone off so you don't have to fight fake taser gauntlets that's a good one too uh quick one from i love the the questions

that woolly has clearly pulled because he has the answer ready oh you had it and you're like i hope and someone can come up with a good answer because nothing beats taser gauntlets but that's something that i personally am all about i know all right how do you know you could just make one right super boom yeah you just glued like stun guns to your hands i know but then the cops will come stop you not if you punch them they willy woolly then their cars yours too mission start yeah mission over uh super boom wants to know how you guys like your eggs i like them scrambled the cheese it was swiss cheese in them like in a lot of ways scramble to be over i'm not big on anything that has uh uh uh not this is certainly a question that woolly did not feel because he

has an answer though you know what this is the opposite you're totally right i like hard boiled eggs also other than raw i don't think there's a way i've tried that i don't like them deviled eggs are good too i like them like a lot i like a lot or as i like to call them tree birds you know i absolutely can't stand sunny side up sunny side up can't stand it the i want the yoke and the the the whites to be mixed i don't care what version i got either it needs to be solid or fucking whatever but runny yoke is the fucking you're right i don't like sunny side up all i i also call club soda super water and fried chicken chicken chicken fry fry okay super water that's not shit that's super water yeah even though i hate club soda that's legit i i i like

my eggs diluted into ingredients and things that i can't taste like a cake like a cake or pie no your favorite ha ha there's no eggs in pie no way they're brought to you by cat i don't know how to cook if you had to eat an egg how would you want it if i had to use someone says all right you have to eat an egg you can even say raw if you just want to get it over with oh i forgot i have to eat it raw would be the quickest okay get sick okay do you mind if i tell a little story i forgot i forgot it's a small blight i have just quick answer okay uh it would be in like a like spinach cheese omelet with no no no no other stuff you have to eat just the yes what style you take because you just have a raw answer dude just hard boiled man uh boils the fastest okay baked

into a peanut butter cookie which is the only the only thing you add to that is peanut butter okay woolly woolly woolly woolly woolly when you're waking up when you're waking up and the lady says how do you want your eggs are you gonna say baked into a peanut butter cookie what what a man i can't add any ingredients no ingredients nothing you can add pepper like a bullet you can add pepper and salt and cayenne and spices and then i just down it raw just right yeah i'd rather starve than eat this i would i think you made the right choice i would yeah there is no form of egg that i can't nice to know that i'll i'll live you hide it in but i would want yeah no no fair enough totally totally uh i completely forgot good get on the peanut butter

cookie i i you i need an easy one i made them i completely forgot to tell a pat blighted story this week go shoot uh people who follow my twitter saw this happen in real time which was awesome oh god this is embarrassing uh yeah god so six did you run into the back window no uh so i'm uh it's 3 30 in the morning and i'm just going to bed and the fire alarm goes off as it loves to do my building is apparently always on fire you guys have been at my place and the alarm has gone off constantly i've lived there for about three years that alarm has gone off over 20 times would you rather have no fire so me i wait i turn off the alarm inside my apartment because that shit's crazy loud i'm like i'll wait it out for 10 minutes doesn't go away

uh and i'm on the top floor of my building so i go fuck it i'll be safe i'll go downstairs i'll walk down the stairs i'll be uh i'll be safe in case there's a fire and i get down to the basement and there's water shooting out of my lobby uh the second floor is shooting water out on the floor my something happened and i wait around in about five minutes after i get to the bottom floor the firefighter comes out like oh it's a pipe burst hit one of the alarms somebody's got a french accent uh and then i trudge my fucking stupid ass back up my goddamn 10 fucking 10 20 flights i don't know how fucking told my building is anyway and i get up there and i'm fucking out of shape i'm tired like uh what a fucking sucker that i am that i actually listened to my fire

alarm i fell for it fire alarms are stupid there should be no fire alarms confirmed and let me tell you why the last time you heard a fire alarm did you even care did you even walk out of the building you were in no you didn't i fanned it out i mean like well the last fire alarm that went off my place since i more or less owned my place it was my fire yes you fanned it out so your fire alarm yeah fine but if you're in a mall or a big apartment always always a college door i always investigate i was at my girlfriend's place hers went off we got up a week downstairs William and i were at my old place and we had a made lp yeah doing yeah that happened in eternal darkness yeah but we were at an old place where we were doing a funny thing and then there was some

we were going down the stairs and some cute girl opens up the door and goes oh what's going on is there a fire like yeah we we think we smell smoke or something and she goes oh yeah maybe i should yeah yeah and then as we go down the lobby she she comes by and then she's like roll everyone's congregating the lobby and we just go like maybe i don't know you can it's probably safe in my apartment if you just come back to start doing like a faunsy thing you do you do it's the hand gesture that doesn't play well but it's like left right left right uh fire alarms need to be better or banned entirely they need to detect fires yeah just let just let Darwinism decide no it's just like no i don't want fire alarms to go away i want them to only go off when there are fires but

because it has gone off so many times in my building for chemical like dangerous chemicals as well smoke whatever not just smoke but like well i have radar in my building the alarm has gone off so many times that there have been two occasions in which i have looked out my window to see fire from the side of my side of the building so it worked and seen flame no because i'm in the apartment because i said fuck it it's another false alarm well that's your fault right that's you not working out there needs to be no false alarms ever marry in that fire alarm for saving your life no the fire alarm didn't save my life me smelling smoke and seeing flame made me go downstairs and then always smoke dude pat confirmed for dying next year

fucking bullshit you gotta go do the same i am so sick that tombstone fire alarms should be banned and it's not even got died in the grave and it's not even underneath a fancy line i'd rather have to do if it's not even me when i came back up to my floor i saw a bunch of old people peek out of their their fucking things to look at me because they didn't give a shit i'm not gonna person can barely be like they they like a monster needs to be eating their medicine for them to actually leave my message is not actually i get rid of fire alarms it's make fire alarms so that they cannot they cannot have false alarms yeah saving lives is inconvenient it didn't save my life for shit willy it inconvenienced me you but there anyway it's fine no one in my building

died from a fire all those alarms for nothing and that's how all those people got stabbed outside though yeah that happened the one time there should be knife alarms and say get a fucking sandwich knife alarm goes off alarms should be banned also because no one has ever stopped a robbery on their car that's not true that's totally true people you owned in your life zero okay stolen all right let's roll man let's roll so um i want fire alarms and cars they'll be equally as useless i want to i just want to another take another like answer a ton of questions of your car on fire right now oh wait you could have just seen it once you're blind if you have a house a fire alarm is great because you know there's actually a fire between an apartment building

or college or something it's like it's never a fire answer any questions fire alarm drills are just come on fire alarm drills in elementary school exist to teach you ignore fire alarms all right all right don't listen to me anyone at home don't follow i'm gonna wrap up i'm gonna wrap up i'm gonna just wrap up like a hundred mecca week post mecca week questions in one it's over which is like it's yes it is it is and it's like hey a ton of things are recommended and stuff i now want to start but i don't know where to start stuff whatever just watch the big oh check that out no one hates the big oh go watch the big oh that's it that's my that's the thing go start right there turn it off a grand log and see where that if you want your mecca thing to be

super weird and not actually very mecca watch a vangillian yeah uh it's like like you're not gonna we've pimped forever uh not enough people i've seen it i'm not sure as you saw he saw the creator of vangillian is working on the new godzilla he's doing yeah i bet he'll be a fucking train wreck hey i know is fucking crazy he's gonna end with godzilla clapping oh minute but his his quote is that i want this movie to be the new nightmare and that was it period it should be directed by his wife i don't get the she wrote the book about him and how he went crazy while he's whatever i'll lend you the book uh what are we watching 3.33 is a train wreck mortal combat at oh but i got my aim of shoes so it's cool you still have another podcast

k swiss i know i'm really want to play it though can you blame me yeah no i'm liam i wanted to say we're looking at mortal combat you still have one more podcast there's a game called monster bag coming out tomorrow i'm looking forward to playing that that game looks really good what is it where it's a uh that sounds like a monsters in my pocket style thing is that a monster in your pocket or is it vita it's really unclear what genre it is but it's free on ps plus and i'm really okay by the way you want to talk about unfortunate licensing and i and the intellectual properties the fuckers that owned monsters in my pocket is the worst name you could have for a children's toy ever no now it is at the time but that's what i would like like one year out oh my god is that a monster

in your pocket or is it i not sure where i was going with that i misunderstood because it's pocket monsters that's what i want to see your cajure sure uh i'm i'm watching kids on the slope and i'm liking it i don't know that television show the thing i talked about in the beginning with uh watanabe and yoko kana oh right right sorry yeah i mentioned it very well i guess i'm gonna go see fast and furious seven okay we didn't talk about it that was incorrect but the fucking furious fast and furious xbox game that game we did talk about it a little bit that gives us a good and free it's free till the ninth or something if you got an xbox give it a swing i'll be playing pillars of eternity and maybe a little bit more axiom verge i don't know i don't

know but i started playing axiom verge i started playing so you want my review you want my you want my early review of axiom verge i don't like it very much but i don't like super Metroid very much so i guess it's amazing yeah i'm aware that i'm wrong i want to hear that i like it a lot but the main character is the most blank oh boy is he running nothing white guy and he's garbage hey jimmy jimmy character and also what's up with calling it a metroidvania there's no vania there's no vania zero no i think that's kind of actually just a metroid i don't like it because in the metroid vania genre i want less metroid more vania i always want there's like all of like eight metroid vanias ever made like the actual usage of the term proper you're right well like guacamole

what is it it's a metroid game sure with punching in a melee combat sure but there's no rpg elements um um ghost song is a metroid game yeah yeah not much vania there not much vania and no you're not all right action for action for action yeah it's really good keep that in mind but the main character sucks a lot of people have been telling me go check out the horror movie in theaters it follows which has something ridiculous like 98 percent on rotten tomatoes and i've been just bugging Montreal the city why don't you have this this is the thing really quickly is that like hey this movie comes out on video on demand on the march 27th because it's only playing in four theaters in north america for whatever reason and then march 27th was around like well time to boot

up whatever it's not there then they say it's such a success in the four theaters north america they're bumping it up to a thousand theaters which is still not enough to even cover like most of north america and then so we're delaying this is something that would drive pat and uh leham nuts so we're delaying the video on demand we're delaying the digital version because we want to make more money on the theater which is still not playing in your city that's still not playing in my city oh my god that's so bad i'm not allowed to watch the film that is so bad and i noticed on twitter that fantasia film festival follows me which is weird dang that's nice and i just wrote hey do you guys you guys all into horror movies do you know what the fucking deal is and they go it's supposedly

opening up this weekend actually in Montreal and they go oh where was that confirmed because i look on every site and there's no information oh you just heard it's gonna so i'm gonna hunt down that movie this weekend hopefully the path here is look for it in theaters boot up whatever look for it in theaters again ask pat to boot up for whatever yeah look for it in theaters regression here give up wait for it to hit netflix or xbox video but i also looked for it i couldn't find a fucking thing because it's in so few theaters no one's been able to get it yeah it's it's fucking messed but i'm trying to find that tweak at director yeah that may be what the fuck i want to watch your movie they won't let me that's a really dumb problem to have even video games don't really have that

problem at least you can import games games don't have a theater release equivalent yeah and what's to imagine if games have a theater release equivalent how fucking infuriating you can only play it inside a game stop like like you can only play at a location arcade arcade games yeah bam did it that was the worst uh what's what's coming up on the channel well life is strange starts today again Tuesday yeah um uh once we get a chance matt and i are definitely going to do good game of thrones of course well pretty much you know we'll say after after life is strange blah blah any of these yeah you can just do that the entire time we're talking about this and just a low dull background echo of blah blah now uh game of thrones we're gonna do because

episodic things we don't drop them you know for the people that were asking um how bad would it have to be for us to drop one i mean right no even if it got that bad we'd have to double down because like oh can't wait to see how bad it got terrible it got terrible that's it um we didn't stop the fucking walking dead season two yeah um mad world wrapped up uh so we're gonna be bringing a force little boat gonna be bringing back um uh some revelations for you guys and once the slot opens up i believe an adventure is is due no no no no no are you okay with us okay well then uh the adventure not yet all right your postpone all right well matt already hinted at the adventure in your am a so i'm getting thrown under the bus all right i'm getting told to it's me i'm not

i'm they're they're cutting their throats at me so i'm going to stop and try to find another out for the record i don't know what the fuck these guys are talking about we're talking about all right well you guys are dipshit we're gonna end on an awkward ass note the wonder red for smash our hashtag wonder red for smash smash save it save it there anything better than that fight hey hey

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