Castle Super Beast - SBFC 094: It All Began In '94

Episode Date: May 26, 2015

We all did some book readin' this week! Fair warning, if you're one of those folks that hate it when we talk about comics, skip 1:18 - 1:43.

WITNESS! WITNESS! WITNESS ME! WITNESS! WITNESS! Yeah. This is a podcast that will be- No, don't spray paint your teeth quick!

Stop, stop! Burn trap the halls of Valhalla! I will shiny and chrome! I'll carry you to the steps of Valhalla myself! We didn't see Mad Max, show of hands! Alright, here we go! Finally! Yeah!

Immortal Joe is the coolest! I thought so? Immortan! Immortan! For whatever reason. Can we- can we- okay, we gotta put it out there. It's a very hard movie to spoil. There's nothing that happens in here!

Guess what? We're not going to get it. Why don't your women do a U-turn? Yeah. That's the plot. No, seriously, the plot of this movie is it's a two hour long car chase. Yeah, it's very awesome. And not in the same way as Death Proof, but in like an awesome way.

Sometimes they stop and like hang out and talk for five minutes and then they get back in their cars and have an even bigger car chase. But it's really big, just two big action scenes. With no scenes about Dave B. Dozee, Bleakie, Mitch and Titch. Yeah. I'm very excited because you remember last week it was kind of like, you know, watch it. It's pretty good. But now you've seen it five times. I've seen it three times now.

I'm going to go see it again. Yeah! No, no, no. You put the fingers up, hashtag, game changer. Absolutely. Because it's just a fucking good movie. Man, there is no chup on this movie. There's like two shots I can think of that are like blatantly CG and then the rest are just like practical effects.

They're CG because that guy would have died. Yeah, I did a little bit of like digging around and it's like, no, almost all that's practical and no one died. Matt showed me, you know when they have the guys swinging around on top of the cars? Exactly. Apparently they wanted to CG that, but then they found a way to do it. And then the director of George Mooney was just like, ah man, that's too dangerous. And the guy goes, the guy's running up until the last minute before he's about to call a CG company. He's like, no, we figured it out.

Pull me up there. I can do it. In the theater. Like CG's play is to remove the safety ropes. Yeah, that's all you gotta do. In the theater, like my girlfriend and I just, as soon as like the fucking guitarist shows up, I just started a mosh pit. We just started fucking banging to put our seats. I read about that guy.

That guy's like an Australian guitarist, playwright, whatever. And he goes, it's the shittiest guitar I ever used but it did play. And it did shoot flames. But it's the shittiest guitar ever. It's the wasteland. And that whole concept, which like, you have your own score. A lot of people might get it, but a lot of people might not. He's the little drummer boy.

Yeah. That when orders come through his guitar, because it just sounds like you're moving. Well, that's it. Because back in the day, you'd have like, No, he's a hype man. Back in the day, you'd have your banner man. Yeah, you'd have your banner man, your drummer boy, and your fucking, you know, your trumpeter. If you saw my Twitter, I bought the Mad Max art book.

Right? So they'll tell you something about the guitar guy. He has a thing on his face. And then when Max starts fighting him, the thing flies off and he just doesn't have eyes. Like they're just not there. He's like super blind that way. So Pat will appreciate this especially. His face, the little mask that he has is his mother's dead face.

Nice. Much like Lisa Trevor. That's correct. And he's angry at the world. And where's his mother's face? Because the world took his mother away and taught him music as the last person in the world that knew about music. Oh my God.

The doof war here. Oh my God. Marin, who's done lots of art for us, loves the doof war. She's posting shit about him all fucking weeks. That's his name? The doof war here. Okay. I like how he has a name.

Everyone has a name. Everyone has this awesome name. New York Mechanics. New York Mechanics. New York Mechanics. New York Mechanics, The Bullet Farmer, you know. Yeah. Oh, jeez.

There's so much. There's… I've got this whole giant anteced. I've got this huge, huge feeling watching it. I don't know how to describe it wet in which… I've seen Hokodonk though, Ken. I've seen Fallout and all that stuff. And those all come from Mad Max.

But I've never seen Mad Max. The source. We get to see Mad Max pull all sorts of shit from all of the things that came from Mad Max. But also still be the originator and be what everyone is saying is a much better movie than the originals. Like the shot of the water is like identical to that new Fist of the North Star movie that came out. Right. It's exactly the same. Because Kenshiro's shoulder pad is literally just Mad Max's shoulder pad.

Yeah, basically. Yeah. And so, again, without getting into specifics, yeah, fucking… Literally? Literally his shoulder pad. I feel like this is the easiest movie we'll ever have to talk about without getting into specifics. Yeah. Well, no.

I just… You obviously have the main group of characters. Yeah. And there's that unexpected character in that main group of people. Yeah. You mean Nox? That was just like a little horrible. Just without, you know…

I was just like, wow, I can't believe the camera kept following this path. Yeah. And then you're like, whoa! All right. Okay. Okay. So fucking everybody if you have it. Even before that, the cast expands and you're like, oh, there's all these people too.

And just like, you know, you have a post-apocalyptic world and it's like, here you got people taking the time to put fucking warts on everyone in the background and everything. Oh, there are a lot of warts. And then level of detail. And then level of detail. Liam said this to me. He's like, wow, everyone that had a deformity sure got paid that day. Yeah. Because anyone that has a certain deformity…

That's a casting call for this movie. Exactly. Exactly. Like we need people with body deformity. And you push it forward to the point where like, and everyone's like used to this type of thing. So fucking little like smiley faces on that one point. Exactly. It's like, this is world building.

This is fucking world building. So my favorite bit about the world building didn't hit me until like a couple hours after I'd seen the movie. There's a point in the film in which is described they are going to drive for 160 days in one direction across the salt. The salt. And I thought that was really weird and didn't hit me until a little while after the movie. Dude, that used to be the ocean. Of course. Damn.

That's left to salt. Dude, the world is so fucked. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, you didn't pick that one. Well, because I think, where on earth could you drive for 160 days in one direction and not on land? And the answer is nowhere. The only place you could ever do that is across the Pacific Ocean on the east coast of Australia.

In the originals, it was just like everyone, everyone has an Australian accent. But in this, there's more an eclectic mix of accents and people. So it's unclear where it actually kind of is. You still have some Australia because, you know, there are more people speaking Australian accent. There was a point where it happened to be Australia. For the things on the walk home, I was trying to think through like like plot hole type things. Nothing really came to mind because it was just cut really tight. Yeah.

And I was like, okay, like Furiosa doesn't have the same accent as everyone else because she comes from somewhere else. You know, and it's like, what the fuck was that stilt shit that was happening? And it's like, oh, poison. It's a different culture. People avoid, you know, it's like, oh my God, everything. That's like, what was that? I don't know if that makes sense. Think about it for a minute.

Yeah. It adds up. I highly recommend you guys get the art book because guess what? This movie was being made in 1997. Concept art goes back to the road in 1997. That's when they started. Really? And then it failed.

It just failed. And they just stopped it, shut everything down and went back again years and years later. So in 1997, they were building this world. Yeah. And I'm like, the storyboards are the same. The original pitch for this was a two-parter. Yeah. And the second part's supposed to be a Furiosa movie.

That never happens where something is in the works for this long and it ends up being good. It's not just good. Like when something is in development for like a decade, it almost universally turns out terrible. The last Guardian is going to be super good, you guys. It's going to be super good. But we digress. Yeah. We digress because welcome to the new episode of the Friendcast.

It all began in 94. It all began in 94? It kept on going in 95. I don't know the 96. I don't know the 96. Something in 96. Something in 96. Something in 96.

It all started in 94. It's so much better than the other lines. Who cares? Yeah. What are we going to get? Like a Street Fighter game or a new KOF that has some kind of intro like that? Never. A legacy intro.

Yeah. I agree. I agree. Come on. Maybe a Dream Match game. Come on. Is that... Well, Mark of the Wolves has like a pseudo-quick one with the screenshots.

But yeah, no, the legacy feels good. It feels good. And either way, we're blowing our wads because that means this episode has forced Team Italia versus Team France with characters that are not from these places. But we're just arbitrarily associating countries because we think that's going to make more We need to fill out the roster. Exactly. Yeah.

What? Since we're... Did you ever play KOF 94? I know. No. All the teams are A, you can't interchange them. You're set to three. Yeah.

And B, you have random countries associated with random people in the KOF. It's not super random. It's like Andy's stage in Fatal Fury was Italy. So for whatever reason in 94, that was Team Italy. Everyone becomes Team Italy. Even though everyone was either American or... Yeah, but it's like the average from Serbia. The country thing I'm not into, but the forced teams I'm way into.

But they were all way similar as well. So Ralph and Clark were almost identical. Yeah, I guess. And I'm weird because I usually play teams in KOF. I love K-Team. But it's like, do you want Robert, Rio, and Takuma identical moves at all most? No, not identical. I want them to be different.

It's intense for a team. The difference is... I want their current, varied versions, but I want you to have to play them as a team. You want to play as Kyo, the hero, learn Daimon. And Benimaru. Play these two weirdos and you want to play Rio. Team Japan was just Kyo, Goro, and Benimaru. Yes.

That was it. That was just like... Because they're all from Japan. That makes sense. And it had the, you're about to die, super desperation move system. You're about to die. You know that they kept up for a bit, but... Kyo just goes, witness me.

Oh my god, dude. I fucking... Well, you haven't been here, but like, because you're in Toronto most of the weekend. But the videos me and Pat and Pia have gone, I'm screaming. I know. I know. I know. I feel it.

I can feel that. I can, of course. But it's one of the few things where it's like, okay, look, how much are people going to overhype this fucking movie? Not enough. And then after you guys, and then I get, and then everything on my Facebook is just like, hey, look, it's Mario Kart Fury Road. Hey, look, it's...

The Unbreakable Furiosa. Exactly. Like, everything is just flooding, and I'm like, all right, this hasn't happened since Avengers 1. Let me see this movie. I have to get ahead of it. Oh, this movie... Oh, guess what?

It's a show of Avengers 1. And then you sit down and you go, oh, my hype is through... My expectations are now through the roof. Show me something. I know Liam did. And you walk out going, I can't believe it actually showed me something. I know Liam did, but did you see it with the D-Box seats? So I bought the seats.

Yeah! And then I went in and I sat on them, and then someone else came and was like, I have tickets for these seats. And we're like, wait, what? And there was a whole big confusion and mix-up. Oh, shit, really? Yeah, and the whole thing... And it was totally my fuck-up.

I got two seats, but I got them actually for the wrong day, but they let us in anyway. Oh. Like the tickets, well, that's... Yeah, so we just went to normal seats, unfortunately. But they were right behind the D-Box seats, so I felt the rumble and all that shit going. No, because... Because you can't feel it exactly, and neither me nor Matt had tried it before. But they have to be hiring a designer for every movie.

Yeah, they are. Yeah, they do. Have you used it before? No, but I did the demo in the lobby. Yeah, because it's not just... I thought it was just a rumble pack. No, no, no, there was no... I thought they just had the jump pack, like 40 Dreamcasts, right?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Like six months ago to a year on the broadcast, one of their emails was from a guy that does this for a living. Okay, that's interesting. It's like you sit in the chair, and you fucking watch the movie over and over, and you just fucking tweak those settings and make it go. It's, you know, because it's basically like... You guys are saying, like, if some movies it makes sense, I'm gonna go ahead and say

car movies. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And if it's not a car movie, then fucking... Because of the rumble and chair makes sense in a car, I'm sitting in one, but I didn't know where else. It makes sense for like Pacific Rim 2 as well, when like stuff is like... Yeah, okay, okay. You know, piloting slash driving vehicles.

So Willy, Willy, for camera pans, when the pans left to the right, your chair suddenly moves. Yeah. And I was like, that's really cool, because it's not obtrusive. It feels good. And the thing, you can set it to none. You see, I don't know, I have not done the D-Box thing yet, I'll have to do it eventually, but I am ideologically opposed to D-Box, because the last thing that I want to be aware of in

a theater when I'm watching a movie is that I have a body. Right. Right. But I saw Mad Max twice with D-Box, and once without, I greatly preferred it. Oh, I'll give it a shot, but like, you can see where I got it. Yeah, because it makes me think. I was skeptical. The Honey I Shrunk the Kids ride at Disney, where they blow like water at you, and like

have that little rat feeling behind your ankles as the rats are running into the thing, is something where like, you get into it, but you feel like you're on a ride, you never really get immersed. Like, when I watch a movie or play a particular kind of game, I like to suck. I like to sublimate. I like to just completely just ram. You're the camera. I want to not exist.

Yeah, you're the camera. Absolutely. I felt it really added to the experience, and yeah, for certain movies, if I think about... What about the notebook? I was talking about notebook. I might not go see notebook with the D-Box if that was even in theaters. Terminator Genesis, I might think about it. Jurassic Park, I might think about it.

Outside of that, I don't know. God, we don't have to go see Genesis, don't we? We have to. You don't want to? I want to. You have to. I want to, but I'm like ashamed that I want to, but I... You should just want to.

But I... We'll talk about that. We'll save it for later. Unless they confirm, like, a fucking extra that looks like McG gets wrecked and ripped open by a T-1000 or whatever, then I don't trust it. So we're up to T-980s now. I'm going into Terminator Genesis positive because I'm like, it can't be worse than Salvation.

You're wrong. No, it simply can't. That's not true. You also got a TV show to write on. Yeah, I haven't watched the second season yet. And a video game. Since we're still talking about Mad Max, like I said, I saw Mad Max twice more, and then after the second time, I watched, I sat down and watched Road Warrior, Mad Max 2.

Okay. Because I watched the first Mad Max. You know what first Mad Max? Pretty... Yeah. Pretty hella boring. It's a little, it's a little like pedestrian, it's a little nothing really crazy happens, and it feels like the world is still the world.

Yeah. Right? Number two is Lord Humongous. Yeah. With the Ayatollah of Rock and Rolla, which I didn't know that Chris Jericho stole that line. I had never watched Mad Max 2 as a kid. I did watch Beyond Thunderdome because when I watched Beyond Thunderdome, I was like, I

totally remember Tina Turner being like the main boss. And the other thing about Fury Road is people, a lot of people complain, Mad Max wasn't really in it. He wasn't really the main character. Well, welcome to the Mad Max universe. The second and third movies? Barring the first movie. He's not really...

Barring the first movie. Well, I had to... And I had to explain this actually to my girlfriend while we were walking out. I was like, that thing you're confused about with the whole, it's about him, but it's not about him at all, is anime. He's... Yeah. He's the avatar.

Right? It's the show about the character that goes around helping everyone else and he gets one or two episodes about himself. Now, that being said, that concept is taken to its ludicrous extreme, and I'm going to be very careful to talk around this. We always love to say, we prefer things to be shown to us as the viewer are not told. This movie has the best example of telling the viewer something and not showing them I have ever seen in that moment, in when Max walks away from the truck.

Yeah. Okay. Yeah. That is the greatest version of that I've ever seen. And it reminds me of that fucking moment in Naruto that you would go on and on about. Which one? Where they're having the flashes back to something Ninja War and the fourth hokage. Oh, gosh.

Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Just throw your shuriken east or whatever and on my signal and they do it and Mully goes, whoa. Yeah. And then literally the character next to him goes, is he going to do something? And he goes, he sure is.

Don't blink. And you turn the page and it's gone. It's fucking gone. You don't get it? Like, you can't see it? Nothing. That's the point. No, that's cool.

Exactly. And like that was either pre or early shippuden type of thing. Right. So it was just like, and you won't know for years. Right. Or ever possibly. Or ever. I wouldn't.

I don't fucking know. But. Dust is on a boat. But like I said, like both Mad Max 2 and Beyond Thunderdome, Mad Max watches a bunch of things and way, way more people have way, way more lines than him. And Beyond Thunderdome is actually, if I could describe it, it's like Temple of Doom. Oh, no. It's a little silly.

There's some kids in it that kind of go, it makes it a little, it's like Return of the Jedi. It's a little more kid-friendly. Well, I was about to say though, it's another one of those series though that's clearly, it's about the legacy and the fact that like you invented a world and a genre and that impact carries out a louder, like, you feel that harder back in the day than you do the quality of the movie or the lines or the memorable parts. It's like this fucking world though.

Yes. You know? Aliens is a fantastic movie to this day. But now you've seen everything in the universe just steal from aliens all over. All the time. Like down to exact voice clips being used in like Resident Evil games. James Cameron made that big post going, Halo wouldn't exist if I hadn't made Aliens. Compare that and as Evan and Galeon does the same thing with a lot of anime stuff and

so much. You show these things and Mad Max to people that have grown up in the modern era and they go, oh, so that's where that came from. But that's not the same as going, oh, what is this completely mind blowing thing? Exactly. So yeah, Aliens and Aliens, I definitely can say you show them to people that are watching it now and it's a lot weaker in terms of like, oh yeah, spaceship. I think Casablanca is the number one because that thing is unwatchable now.

I completely disagree. It's not unwatchable but it's the origin of everything. No, I fucking love that movie still. No, I had a great time watching it. I thought it was very good. How old were you when you saw it? I was, what, 25? I'm surprised.

26? Because I saw it recently. I watched it like four or five years ago. No, I saw it recently and I was like, oh my god, this is so plotting and like everything. Well, that's because you were a child, Liam. Yeah, I know. No, I totally agree. The movies and actions were plotting like that's only new.

I remember watching Bridge on the River Kwai when I was like 13 and I loved it. Well, that's kind of what I was getting at when like I got a lot of shit for it too. But I was talking about Taxi Driver, how like it's a very good movie but it takes so long to get where it goes and we're just conditioned to being so fucking easy. And back then it was like so much slower. You know what, watch a fucking World War II movie, even your average one is like two and a half hours long. Yeah, marketing didn't exist.

It has like 25 minute long scenes of Nazis talking in offices. And it's not even like, oh, these are the new kids directing these movies that are making it like that. It's like we went from watching Taxi Driver to fucking Wolf of Wall Street, literally the same guy just changing his style and making things bam, bam, bam, you know? So it's just like, it's hard. But when you guys were warning me about playing RE4 after I played Gears of War first. Oh, it's weird.

I can't even imagine that. Right? But you know what? It's still going to be fine. Because RE4 is a better game than Gears of War. And that's it. And so you have to have faith that the material that you're looking at is just fucking good on its own and the dating won't be as bad because people can recognize quality.

Just finishing off the Mad Max stuff is like, like I said before, this movie is being made in 1997, right? So there's probably way more backstory than even the movie shows and that's why because DC is putting out a Mad Max comic that is prequel backstory to many of the characters. So I tried to go to every comic book store like in Montreal today, no one had it sold out. But the first issue is a Morton, Joe and Nux. Their backstory leading up to the movie.

The second issue is all about Furiosa. Yeah, dude, but it's DC. We're not allowed to like it. No, we are allowed to like it because it's good. No, save that for my week. And then the last issue is all about Mad Max. I assume in his pre-Harry long hair days and that's the other thing is that watching Mad Max 2, Road Warrior and Beyond Thunderdome, there's tons of little send-ups and things.

Do you remember one of the wives in the backseat has a little music box and she's just rotating it? That's something that's all over Beyond Thunderdome, Mad Max has that. The Morton, Joe is played by the same actor who played the first final boss in the original movie. Toe-cutter. And he's like, it's not the same character. He just loves me.

But it's the same actor, yeah. So there's all these little things and like the gag with Mad Max having a fucking shotgun that doesn't work. He also held up someone in the other movies where his shotgun did not work and he just kind of faked it or whatever. But let's not get too specific though. Yeah, sure. But you know, like since we're already like halfway through there, during this weekend

I was on the scared to care charity livestream that Vernon from Hot Pepper Gaming, and also do you remember Sheena? Not quite, Frodo. No, no, no, no, no, Vernon, that's Jared you're thinking of, Vernon's the other guy. Do you remember Sheena from Pax Boston, the girl that came up to us towards you? She also ran this stream and I was unfortunately subjugated to play RE6 and RE6 is way, way, way worse than I remember it when it was at launch, which is shocking to me. I played the PC version when it came out and was like, oh man, this controls so badly.

And I was playing Leon. So I was like, let me give this the best shot ever. And I was playing Leon and I was playing, it's not the best setup because there is a room full of seven people that need over Skype. And I kind of wish that they kind of, everyone's there to have fun and get money for charity. So this was to raise money for summer camps for kids with cancer, really good charity to work for. But when there's seven people in a room locally and then there's one voice coming from Skype,

it's not the best. Hey guys! I saw a lot of people going, oh, Matt's giving out some A material but no one can hear him because there's seven people. So the stream was playing? This was me playing the campaign online with another guy in there, but there's seven other people in the room. There's so much going on.

But it was still a fun time. A lot of people that hadn't played RE6 in that room were like, wow, this is awful. And I went, yeah. The campaign is so bad. And I go, yeah, no, it's like, how come there was no prompt to come jump out of that train? The controls are so bad. And I want to specify that for the areas that they give you in the campaign. They're not wide enough for the turn radius.

The problem with the controls is you have too much control for the environments in the campaign. And they're only good when you put them in a wider area. It's a big, wide-open area. And when you put them in a wider area. They're great. But you have all these fucking tiny corridors and your character has self-controlled, non-turning movement.

But when you get into mercenaries, it gets just as good as Vanquish. Rock and roll and flippin' rumble. I forgot in the Outs campaign how many cabin sequences there are. There's four in the first chapter. And everyone's just like, well, this is a lot like the cabin sequence. I'm like, I know, right? It's just awful in every way. Glad we did not open up.

So we finished the first campaign. I had a good time. And right after that, I had to go and get the postcard prints for Momocons. Yes. Are really good friends that, I always forget how to pronounce it, I'll tell you your use. I'll tell you your use. They did such a good job where I was like, Son of Dunn. We need to print these.

Okay, let's go down to this copy set and print them. And I was like, all right, we'll give them the job and then I'll come back in a few days and get them hopefully just in time for Momocon. And now our good friend just stayed there with me, cut them right there, got them all 100 done. And I was just super thankful because a lot going on this week. Hey, I hadn't seen them all before this, but they're fucking great. They're fucking great.

The Shamanite one, the Bloodborne one is fantastic. I think Cranky's take on the stand. What's that called again? The blow shot kind of thing. I think that was really... I'm not gonna... Cranky executed it, but it was kind of my idea where I was just like, we need a dedicated space.

It's signing space. Because it's anything you guys remember when we signed something, especially like a game cover. Yeah. Oh, Willie and Pat and Liam took all the... Where am I supposed to... It's the fourth person. It's tough.

It's tough. Yeah. So Cranky did a really good job with that. And our other artist friend did a really good job with this one. Those turned out really well. Dude, you have notes. It's real life. I have notes.

He has notes every week. I have notes every week. Does he? Yeah. Shit. That's where the phone comes at. That's where the phone comes at. The other...

The one game I played... I'm sorry, Pat. I downloaded it and had no chance to play Witcher. That's fine. I wish I could talk about it. I wish... Yeah. It's like, Liam, you played at least some of it?

Yeah. Not since last time. But I did play... Oh, damn it. I did play... I'm not sure... I think at least Liam might have heard of a game called Lifeless Planet where you play as a little astronaut.

Yeah, I never actually played it. But I saw it was existing. It came out on Xbox like, you know, like a, you know, games of gold or whatever. You play as a little astronaut alone on a planet and that's it. You have a little burst. How's the life on the planet? It's lifeless, actually. Okay.

Pretty sparky. Except for one mysterious girl that can exist without a space suit. And you're just platforming and just long stretches of just trying to navigate around the rocks. It's 3D or 3D. It's 3D. It's like really zoomed out camera. You're a little astronaut and you have a burst of air in your jet pack.

So you have a little double jump. That's all you get for like the longest time. And you have to constantly refill your oxygen tank to air. And you get crash landed on this planet and you're like, wow, this planet isn't green like Command said. Okay. It's desert. And you find a Soviet outpost and the Russians have been here for years and you find their

skeletons and notes about what happened. It's really, really intriguing. I, I wound up playing it for like three hours. No combos, no combat, no enemies except for long falls and like vines that kill you. Okay. Yeah. It's really, really interesting. It's a little rough around the edges.

It's like all through the world once indefinitely knuckle style and there's some little like hitches here and there, but it's still, it's not a looker either. Is it like open world? Like can you go over the whole planet or is it? You can look back all the way from where you came, but there are like a loading screen. I'm like, I played for three hours or was like two minutes. So there, it is like area based kind of. Yeah, it's area based, but you do long stretches of seeing where you came from.

That's cool. It'd be tough to do a full planet. I don't know what it is, but it was just very charming. There's a little bit of voice acting here and there and just long stretches of just, you know, navigating the environment, trying to figure out where to go. And I really, really enjoyed it. It's on Xbox one PC. Xbox one, I assume PS4.

Not right, not yet on PS4. Okay. So it's just Xbox one PC right now. And the last two things that did really quickly is that I saw a documentary on Netflix called I'm maybe really familiar with it, Anna Rofsky's Dune. No? Anna Rofsky's Dune. Yeah.

Okay. It's a documentary about the guy that started to make a movie based on Dune and just Hollywood just sandbag him. Oh, the one in like 2004, right? Super hard. They sandbagged the Dune movie. Yeah. The 80s and 70s.

Oh, with the black and white posters and shit. It was the director of El Topo, which is a crazy Spanish director. And El Topo was a movie that inspired Suda 51 a lot. And he was like, I'm going to make a Dune movie. And he was going to get Mick Jagger, Salvador Dali, of course, Orson Welles to play in this movie. And Orson Welles. Out of his grace?

Salvador Dali. He was alive at the time. This is like 78. Okay. And Salvador Dali goes, I will not be in this movie unless you play me $100,000 an hour. And then they go, well, we can't pay that. He goes, I'm Dali. And then they go, okay, how about we pay you $100,000 a minute?

And they go, yeah. And then they go, how long is this role in the movie? It's about five minutes. Well, there you go. Yeah. Yeah. Something full of Dali. Well, there'd be melting clocks in this movie.

So Salvador Dali, I'll play the emperor of the galaxy. And they're going to have Mick Jagger play like this and that, and they got this dream team. Wow. They got Geiger well before Alien. To do more. Before. Before.

And then when all of this fell apart, when they got a big Bible of every shot, every single thing, all the actors were locked in. They shopped around in Hollywood and they go, no. And then they go, fuck, they couldn't get the financing. It all fell apart. And then everyone else from their team got handpicked to make Alien. Geiger, the guy that designed the Nostromo, all these ships, they just moved on to Alien. And that's why without this movie, Alien would not be what it is.

It was amazing documentary. And thus, if Alien doesn't exist, then mostly everything does. Cinema and video games are doomed. The team that was on this went on. The director, the Spanish guy, I run off skier, whatever. He goes, I'm very thankful that at least the team I created went on to make something amazing. And he goes, when David Lynch finally made Dune, I did not want to see it.

I did not want to see someone else making the movie. And then my son finally managed me to go see it. He, his son was going to play Paul, right? The main character of Dune. And his son was like 13. And he goes, Paul, you're going to train for two years with karate and jujitsu and military shit. You're going to train for fucking two years.

And I'm just going to sacrifice my son because I would sacrifice myself to make Dune. I am crazy. I am insane. And then the movie didn't get made. And his son, you see his son now, and he's like in his 40s, and he's like, well, I learned jujitsu, though. So that was cool. Was Ridley Scott involved at all?

No, not at all. Because I always assumed that he picked Giger or was involved with... No, get me that weird penis guy from the Dune movie. I watched the Alien special of things, and he just so happened. All this was being done in France. And then that's what, like, Alien was being made in England, and they just like, do you know anybody? And if that guy wasn't in France working on this version of Dune, then now none of this

happened. So of course, when he actually saw David Lynch's Dune, he goes, oh, this is fine because this is fucking awful. Wow. I'm glad that this is a horrible, horrible abortion, he writes. And it was just, he was sandbagging, like, David Lynch's Dune is no great thing, but... David Lynch's Dune sucks because, like, it's not, it is unwatchable if you haven't read the books.

Yeah. And if you've read the books, it's not faithful to them. So you're stuck in the Tudor Rockin' a Hard Place. Yeah, exactly. The documentary starts on Nicholas winding whatever, the guy that directed Drive, and he goes, I was invited to Darnofsky's Place, and he showed me the big Bible that they had. He talked me through every shot. So essentially, I'm the only person that's seen his Dune, and it's the greatest motion

picture ever made. Fuck you. And he just goes, I am the privilege of one. You know what, though, man? We live... It's crazy. At least we live in a world where when amazing projects don't happen, a documentary can at least tell us about that.

Yeah. There's a giant book that's this thick of an entire movie that you can look at. You know? We've got Unseen 64 and all kinds of shit like that. To like, go, hey, look what you almost got, but didn't. Yeah. You know? And the last little thing is that I watched another movie on Xbox, a video on Assumance

on PSN as well. I absolutely 100% recommend this. It's a vampire comedy from the guys that created Flight of the Concords called What We Do in the Shadows, and it's a Parks and Recreation version. So, sorry, is it the two guys from Flight of the Concord? Yes, they're both written, but the one guy with the glasses... Okay. Because it's the name of their band, right?

He plays one of the vampires, and the other guy is just a writer of it, whatever. And it's called What We Do in the Shadows, and it's probably one of the funniest movies I've seen in a long time. It's a documentary about four vampires living in a flat in modern times, and there's one Nost for Rot too style vampire, one vampire dandy, one Vlad Teppish, Dracula, and one Rockstar, and Rice, Deacon Fry. His name is Deacon. Oh, okay.

And they all live together, and it's a hilarious comedy where it's very, very Parks and Recreation, where the camera zooms in on people's faces, and it's fucking hilarious. It sounds like you're describing a comedy version of White Wolf's Vampire the Masquerade. It is. It is very... They wake up, and then they go, alright, we're going to have a flat meeting. In 10 minutes, they live in New Zealand. Of course they do.

Of course they do, because it's one of the concords. So they live in New Zealand, and they go, alright, we're getting invited to the masquerade. I am dressed as Blade. Vampires don't like Blade. No, but vampires really like Blade. He's half vampire. He hunts vampires, Deacon. Oh, I forgot.

And then they have a familiar, this woman familiar. It was like, he was going to promise me that he was going to bite me. It's been five years. I constantly get called... Is this supposed to be a QE accent? Yeah. I don't know what to do. I don't know what to do.

It sounds like you're from India. Yeah, you're doing an Indian accent. Fake India. It's really hard. And she goes, I have to scrub their fucking bathroom of blood, and I have three kids, and I can't be doing this. I want to turn a life now. And then the last little joke about it is that they meet a group of werewolves, just

regular Kiwi guys that are all in track suits, and the flat-temperish guy just turns to the camera and goes, alright, I smell werewolves, some shit's going to go down here. And they talk to the werewolves and goes, hey, what are you guys doing smelling each other's crutches? We don't smell each other's crutches. We smell our own crutches. Shut up. Get out of here.

I'm like, oh, yes, yes, this van putt, these werewolves, so scary, so scary, huh? And they go, stop with the accent. Stop, stop with the accent. You're flying all over the place. Sorry. The handle's over there, and you've flown all the way to the side. It's one of the funniest things. So sorry, I wrote it down.

What's it called? Sorry. What we do in the shadows. What we do in the shadows. Yeah, okay. I laugh nonstop. I like to see it. A bunch of the werewolves kill somebody, and then these cops are like, I don't know,

I'm going to tour all these guys' guts. We assume it's dogs, and they find some random cute dog. We have to put this dog down. We have to put him down. And he sees this cute dog with no blood on his face. Like, here we go, and they put the dog in the back of the shirt, and I start laughing my ass off. Sorry.

It's fucking fantastic. Is it starring the guys from Flight of the Concorde? It's starring one guy. It's written by them. It's written by, like, someone else, okay. But it stars the one guy of the glass as a Javier, a jargon, or whatever, and he plays the Vlad Teppish guy, and another guy that appears in Flight of the Concorde plays the head of the werewolf clan.

It's hilarious. I can't recommend it highly enough. So yeah. So it went on a little bit, though. No worries. I know especially as Woolie's had a giant week. I did, but first let's take a quick word from our sponsors. Today's episode is brought to us by a new sponsor, Casper Mattresses.

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Thank you. Thank you friendly ghost. I've got a good night's sleep. Okay. What's your giant week? Oh man. Giant attack. Dude, I live on the road now.

Condense it down into 12 minutes. Yeah, exactly. So like, I'm going to start off with just like, so when we last left off, I was in New York and had like another day to go. It's true. And so on the last day. How's your step ones? Hi.

Fine. Not bad. Not bad. I went to this thing that I talked to you about it, Matt. Not too long ago, but it's this show called sleep no more. And it's probably the best stage production I've ever seen. You go down to, you sign into a hotel and you basically walk through these fucking giant warehouse doors into pitch black darkness.

Okay. And then you sign up and get a card, a playing card that acts as a ticket. And then you get led into this like speakeasy kind of lounge bio shock bar. And this host comes out and it's a creepy old hotel. And he introduces the whole night to you. And he's like, well, you know, we're going to be escorting you onto the premises. Enjoy your stay and so on and so forth. You get forcibly separated from anyone you go in there with.

You're given this mask right here. Ah, masquerade. So everyone has to put on this mask. It's creep ass mask. Creep ass mask, right? It's like a play mic. Like a street. It's like the scream mask with the bottom cut off and with a duck bill kind of type of

thing, right? And you get, so everyone at all times must keep that mask on. And you all get ushered into random floors, random places in this giant ass empty warehouse. And so you walk through it and not warehouse. Like a hotel. And so I got put off on the bottom floor and I saw everyone kind of go left and I just kind of went right in this area. That's what you should do.

The whole thing is dark. There's music, like creepy ambient music throughout the whole thing. And what it is, and honestly what it is is a real life video game. It's a self-contained ARG. And you go around and like you look at things from like people that are staying at the hotel. You find messages and letters and things that to look at. And every once in a while you see somebody that's not wearing a mask and that's a character. And then they're doing their performance.

So you can choose to follow them and see what they do or keep going. So they're running their NPC routine. They're running their routine. Well, but it's the opposite way really. Yeah, you're right. You're the NPC. But their routine is like a full thing that you can go through and like I just, you know, I came across somebody and I stuck with them for a little bit and then they briefly crossed

paths with another person. And you see just a crowd of people watching them. They all get together, have a moment where something happens with their interaction. And then you choose which one to follow. And then they both go sprinting off in two directions, you know. It was unbelievable because like running, running, running. Yeah. And not everyone makes it.

Yeah. Right. And then they sometimes. What happened? He's dead. And sometimes they go sprinting up or downstairs and shit like that. And you lose them around corners and end up lost in a completely different area. Right.

There's shit where like there's like hidden doors and things. That's really cool. You know, you get lost in like a forest type area at one point. What? What? Like there's an indoor forest with hedge maze. Okay. And I was following like this nurse.

Right. And then she's like a creepy fucking like weirdo nurse that's a walking on her own. And I noticed that like she, she sprinted past me. I was going the opposite way. And there was a giant crowd following her and I was like, oh, I guess I'm first. So I ran by, I ran behind her and then she slipped through the cracks of this fence that was, I'm not big enough to fucking slip through. You're too big.

Yeah. So I'm like shit. So I like exterior collisions it down, you know, until I eventually find my way through the maze to where she was. And I come across her finding another nurse on the ground. They pick each other up. And we follow them to this area. And the whole thing just, no, there's no, there's no word spoken.

It's all through just gestures, noises and movements. All mute. Nobody speaks. No one speaks the whole time. Okay. Right. So it's a silent thing. And at one point they, they, like one of, they go into this like cabin that's locked

and like they go inside and lock the door. And you can't, you can't follow them, but you can kind of peek through the cracks of the wood to see what's going on. They're having a weird interaction in there. And then at one point, like the door flies open, one of the nurses comes running out. And the other one's like, like, no, wait, kind of come back, kind of gesture. And then she goes running out. And then everyone's staring and looking at this one that's like, just kind of lost.

And she looks around. And then she looks at me and extends her hand. And I'm like, oh, and she grabs my hand and pulls me alone into the cabin. You got lucky. And shuts the door. And no one else is in there. And then she sits me down and like pulls my mask off. And like, there's a moment.

And then she starts actually explaining a part of the plot of what's happening. There needs to be that, at least at some point. Which I'm not going to spoil for anyone to happen to. Tell no one ever. No, I will not. Take it to your grave. And like, and like you, and then she like starts preparing some tea, like for me and like gives me like a bit of the lore.

And then this whole fucking crazy thing happens and it's all synced up with the music. That's, that's happening there at the same time. And then like, Yeah, they all have to be running on pretty, like exact time. Yeah, exact schedules. And then she, and then eventually like, she like spilled part of it on me and like freaked out and started slamming her head on shit and like losing her mind. And then just like forces me out.

And I'm back on my own and then she shuts the door again. And everyone's looking at me. You kind of like, what, what did you get? What happened? And it's like, no, you can't talk. Silence. It's an amazing experience. It's super good.

And I know, again, I don't want to give too much details about it, but it's worth it to just go check this out. It's like nothing else you will really see as far as performance is going. There's, there's things very similar is that when I was walking by to go somewhere in Toronto, someone gave me a card for a place that's very similar, but it's literally, especially for Liam, it's room escape. There's a place like that. Yeah.

There's a room and timers and puzzles. Yeah. And so there's that. This is like a more theatrical. Yeah. The room escape thing is totally here in Montreal called Amaze. That's, that's one thing. But this is, excuse me, this is sleep no more.

And the only thing I want to say is like. Is it scary, by the way? Yeah, man. Oh, okay. Especially when you're on your own and just tons of creepy shit. No, you walk into an empty fucking nursery and you, you see the creepy bloodstained crib and then you're like, okay. And then around the roof is just dolls of babies with their heads ripped off, hanging and shit.

Like it's fucking creepy. That's scary. The whole way through. That's too scary. And, and like all I want to say. Why do they run the baby version? And the one thing, and the one thing I'll give you, like, because, because I saw another performance where a girl got pulled into a secret room.

Oh, like a separate thing. Yeah. So there's like, it's like, if you're lucky, you're one, you're one of the, the few that gets the blurred piece of the plot. Right. People are in this. Yeah. The performance?

No, like how many customers. Okay. So it's a five floor hotel. Right. With multiple rooms. We're talking 2,100. How many people are let in? How many people are let in at a time?

I want to say that over the course of its last three hours. Okay. And that was my second question. You're locked in there for about three hours. Three hours is a good amount. Right. To really get in there. And you're probably in there with, uh, maybe like 100 people.

Okay. Absolutely. That's way more than that. That time limit and those amounts seem correct. But it's, it's a number that is, it's large enough that like, you can, you will see a giant crowd and go, some shit's going on over there. But if you wander off on your own, you'll be totally alone. Yeah.

And, and, and, and, and the only other thing I'm going to give with it is that there's a moment, there's moments where, uh, stories start to like come together. Right. And you get awesome moments where like, um, you know, you beat you, like a bunch of people meet up at a bar and like start playing, like they're playing this creepy fucking card game. And eventually like one, are they playing Yu-Gi-Oh? Is that one?

They're playing like, they're playing a game with a deck of cards and every time like a certain card gets played, like one of them, like everyone looks around and gets all kind of fucked up. And one of them grabs that card, walks over to a wall that's just darkness. They grab a lamp and pointed at this wall and this card has been nailed infinitely to this wall. And they just add another number. And then like a dude in like, uh, that's like, they're, everyone's having their shots playing

this card game. And then this man just soaked in blood, just walks through the room and you're like, all right. Follow that. Are you going to follow him or not? Are you going to? No. All right.

Well, hey. Well, unfortunately what you'd want to do is figure out where he came from. Exactly. Right. And so the genius of the design of this thing is that you do decide, for example, to follow him or not, or whatever you get this, oh God, a pregnant little woman just down in shots at this bar and you're like, what's her story? And whoever you follow.

I imagine you have to go to this like 15 times to get it right. If you want to get the full thing, want to replay values, so they do sell an art book at the end that kind of pieces it together for you. How much did this cost? So there's depends on when you go because you can go for like the full thing where like you stay there, have a dinner, have a full show for like, no, I didn't do that. And that full thing is like, as like, well, like I think like 225, 250 or you can go see a regular show on a regular night for like 150 or special nights, we got in a hundred

bucks. Okay. Yeah. And like you and the bar is real, like you order drinks at the real bar and like, and then they like, they're like, you know, the fucking skeleton serve it to you. Your bio shock style rapture bartenders serve it up to you while someone someone gets a drink with a roofie and they wake up and the only thing I would say is like, like you have a moment where all your your characters as it were get let you get you follow them down

into this large like area of this big banquet hall and it's just you get to watch this whole amazingly coordinated scene unfold and then some shit goes down and then that banquet breaks up and then you get to choose where to who to follow again. And then you realize that's loop two. Is this the thing you're saying? Oh, okay. Yeah. And so you're like, Oh my God, this is actually a sequence.

So I can now go right. And then you start to do the second loop and see what you can see blood man over there not covered in blood and go right blood man. So you start and then exactly and you let's you do that second loop, but the second loop is not the exact same. Of course. Yeah. And then yeah.

Like the thing from Kimmy Schmidt, the the haunted like, no, that's something that's another fucking werewolf. Like, that's some dumb restaurant shit. That's not too many spiders you saw something that was similar. Yeah, there's a place in there's a place called Timescare in New York City. And I think it's I think it's a whole theme. No matter what you do, no matter what experience you have, no matter what restaurant you go to, no matter whatever cultured thing you do, Matt will always zoom in on the Denny's

equivalent. Yeah. Of that experience and and go, oh yeah. So anyway, the putting it out there because it's something that is clearly not going to be around forever. Yeah. And it's clearly very time limited. So it's there.

Get to it if you can. And doing some research on the guys that put it together, apparently these guys got hired to do a resistance three promo thing in the UK of a similar experience. I remember there was a thing like that now that you actually so it's following. And they converted a giant room into a resistance three survival chain. Yeah. Wow. It's awesome that they can make a living.

Exactly. There was a there's a failed Kickstarter that was kicking around a long time ago that was the most absurdly large scale thing I've ever seen was the idea was like, OK, Detroit land is cheap. It's fucking cheap because no one even lives there. It's just empty lots. Why not turn all of Detroit into an area? What if we bought eight blocks of Detroit and turned it into a gigantic, running man

payfall scenario? Running man. It would cost nothing. Well, land wise, and then that never went anywhere. Logistics. But that'd be so cool. Yeah. Yeah.

But no, this is. Turn it into the Thunderdome. This is your real life. Because I like ARGs in concept on paper. Yeah. But actually executing them is very difficult. And the main problem is that you have a life. No.

It's not easy enough that I can digest it. The problem with ARGs, they have to be balanced towards the Internet. And the Internet has infinite time power for ARGs. And which means you and I will never be able to actually. No individual can. Right? And that level of running out to the phone booth as it's ringing to answer the phone in time, that's not going to happen.

Yeah. But if you have a localized ARG with its difficulty scaled towards you and being solving it in two hours, then yeah. And again, you're locked in. And at some point. Even if you don't solve it, progress is nice. And you can loop back to the entrance. Eventually.

If you wander long enough, you'll find it where you get back into the bar. And the band is still playing. And you can have a drink. And you can calm down. And then put the mask on and go back in. So unless it's spoilers, how does it end? Is there one guy that thinks you're something? How does it end?

But I mean, it's not possible for people to stay out at the end. No, no, no. There's. Okay. I'm not going to get into specifics. But they funnel everyone. So there's three loops. And each loop gets more fucked up.

And then the final loop, basically, when all the shit's going down and you're fucking, your mask is sweating, you're, and you're just, you're fucking drenched. And you're just like, ah, because it's three hours of just your senses being overloaded with like immersion. Um, it hits the point where you go for that final banquet. And there's basically like, if you're following anybody, you're going to end up in this, in this room and you get that eyes wide shut creepy ass feeling of like everyone is in masks, just watching something go down, you know, and then there's, there's these people

that are in all black that are your enforcer type people that you, you can't see them. Yeah. Stop fucking up the story. But if you turn a corner where you're not supposed to be, there's one standing there. Okay. And eventually they slowly close in on you and you, you get ushered into the, towards the exit. Yeah.

Okay. That makes sense. That's what you pay every possible hallway and exit and all they have to do is move. That's what you pay $150 a person for. Yeah. And they even have it like in the, you know, the thing where it's like a game teaches you a mechanic and then like you use it when you need to. So you have a little bit of that where like the first super dark pitch black hallway,

you turn and you see a light source and next to that light source is a big super, like what is that shape? And it's like, oh, that's an enforcer right there blocking a path or you're not supposed to go to the right type of thing. You're like, okay, that's what he's there for. My safety slash. Don't, don't do that. Out of bounds.

Out of bounds. So that's the shape. Oh, today is going to be a long podcast. Yeah. I know. I'm just looking at the time. I'm cool. I'm going to, I know.

I'm like, no, that's fine. Man, just make a long podcast. Yeah. This, this, because this thing was awesome. I wanted to give that the time it needs. Sounds really good. Beyond that, I checked out the Google and Hyman. Like half of it was shut down.

So I didn't get to see a lot of it. What was there was not very great. It was pretty underwhelming. Well, he's done better. You know, what can I say? What about that part where the guy got killed in the born movie? Our Montreal Museum of History is more interesting with its permanent selection, I think. Okay.

Fair. Yeah. But anyway, there's that. And then, yeah. And then I fucking like, I got back to Montreal and then immediately got on a bus to Toronto for Animate North. Ooh. You know, and.

Apparently, you know the meaning of love now. The concept of love. Ah, whatever. I don't know. Understand the concept of love. You're starting to. Understand. Understand.

Understand. So I ignore it so much. That's a radio. It persists. It persists. But that's funny. It's coming to a climax right there. So, yeah.

I've been to Animate North fucking countless times. All right. I've been there as the like, wide-eyed, anime fanboy first year. Of course. Oh my god. You're with your little sand village thing. I'm spending a thousand dollars on everything. Yeah.

That was a rough time four years ago. Yeah. Oh, the rain. And six years. Going back to like, oh, like, oh three basically. Yeah. And watched it. Oh god.

So old. Ah. Watched it like, you know, blossom into this giant ass fucking convention center thing. And I've gotten there as the tired vet. And I've gotten there as the guy who's just going to spend time in the video game room. Yeah. As the guy who's going to just be in the dealer's room. Just the events and so on.

So I've done it from every angle. Excuse me. You wear many hats. Many faces. Including the most recent one being us there on business. Right. Yeah. And I've kind of like been like, well, I've done it.

I've done it all. But what I didn't realize was he never cosplayed something. I had, but I hadn't done the, I don't even go indoors. I'm just doing the cosplay. The only cosplay route. And that's a completely different experience. And it was fucking awesome. So I joined the jet set radio and jet set radio future cosplay group at anime north this year.

And one is professor K. And the experience of having literally like every playable character from the game with a giant fucking boombox blasting jet set radio music as we just take over. Oh, sure. It was really cool. Was like 11. How many of those moments or how long did it persist those moments of like, no, these aren't costumes.

Fuck it. That's so and so. Well, I am professor K. No, shut up. Like the thing is, the hotel we stayed at was like, you know, obviously a little bit off from where the convention center was. Same thing as last time. Location.

Yeah. Yeah. No, I mean, like the same sort of hotel where it was kind of a ways away from where. No, I stayed at a night and stayed in that one. I wasn't on the one over the bridge. I was on the one on the same side. But the point was that coming into the parking lot, like you could just hear us coming. Yeah.

From down the street. And then it's like, oh shit. Oh shit. Jet set radio is coming through. Make way, make way. And we just roll in. And it fucking was, it was just an amazingly satisfying experience because you have the soundtrack to the show you're doing while the photos are going off and shit.

It'd be cool if next year people are coming in with a like a blind guy with a onesie with a flame guitar. Yeah. And his music is blasting. There was driving cars. It was, it was amazing. So we're going to have to check your guitar for weapons. No, but it's just a light.

Oh, dammit. My mom made this all night. And had quite a few moments where like fans kind of came up and were just like, oh shit professor. What? Yeah. Two layers. Yeah.

And like, surprise. You know. And like I went in to the actual dealer's room twice. You know, like it was just, I didn't go to any events. It was just cosplay group, did the photo shoot and then just fucking party and like had a great time. And it's a very different type of experience. But like that put the fun back into the con for me because it was pretty dry otherwise.

I had friends who used to do that every year and they got fed up of it and they went and just didn't do that. And they were like, oh my God, this is all fresh and new. Yeah, yeah. So like shout outs to the crew that I went with and like I feel sorry for your ankles. Everyone on rollerblades for hours. That shit is painful as fuck. But you did it and it was amazing.

Like I'm looking up Jet Set Radio Future Cosplay on Google and there's like one group that did something. It's not the most popular thing. It just doesn't happen. And there was like one other professor K, you know, so it's like I'm like, okay, we're doing something that everyone knows, but no one's willing to do it. And it fucking works. How many Borotos did you see?

I don't even know what it looks like. I don't even know. It has a wrench and it's all down. Well, that's and that was part of the fun too, because it's like, you know, like I love JoJo, but you're going to see JoJo every year. Yeah. You're going to see the stuff that we know this fall. You can see Attack on Titan every year, but you will not see Jet Set every year.

And that's what's fun. That's what's fun. Why are you going to see Attack on Titan every year? It's real like that's never going to go away. And beyond that, I guess just like the sort of peripheral Toronto experience was not very happy. Suck it, Toronto. Yeah.

Like after getting off the bus, I saw this giant lineup for something called Uncle Tetsu's Cheesecake. That's awesome. And it's just a huge fucking line around the bus station. And I was like, okay, mental note. And you know, and then on my way back, like I was like, okay, I've got three hours to kill before my bus comes, let's stand in this line and find out. I feel like that cheesecake hit me with a hurricane.

Yeah. Like I'd never do this otherwise. But it's like, fuck it. And it was an hour and a half standing in line, got the cheesecake. Wasn't even that great. Oh no. It was all right. Amazing.

Was it expensive? No, it was not expensive, but it's like world renowned cheesecake. And I tried it and I was like, you know what, like it tastes more like a pancake without sugar. Like it's all right. It was all right. It doesn't taste as good as that seven-year-old cheesecake that I had at Paxford. The century cake.

And it's like one cake per person, like one thing per person. Well, when you've got lines that big, exactly. Exactly. Or someone will take it out and sell it to a guy in line for a double. Yeah. So they're, you know, whatever with that. You know, halfway back in the line, those guys are willing to pay it all. They're desperate.

They'll do anything. Walk through downtown Toronto and like, I was like, hey, is that a helicopter crash? And the security guy was like, no, it's a suicide squad. I'm like, oh, same difference. So yeah. Yeah. Yeah. In downtown.

Yeah. Are you in the movie now? So I walked by and I saw the whole place converted to the whole corner of Bay and like whatever the other main street was converted to midtown or not midtown, whatever. Some disaster. I forgot the name of the city. Gotham town. It's not Gotham.

It's another city. Whatever. But anyway, it's like a giant helicopter crash into a bus and police cars and like burnt out just props and shit around. And it's like, yeah, okay, this is going to be a scene in the movie. And just everyone's taking selfies. It's almost like a, like a fucking like a theme park and how open it is for you to just walk through the set.

Oh, it doesn't have like bars around it. It's really weird. Like there's a couple of guards standing around, but you can get really close to all the props and shit. And it's almost like, is this promotion? I bet you was like second. You don't like that camera, but you can't, you don't like that elsewhere. Like, because you can't let more people take pictures of Harley Quinn's costume.

Yeah. And everyone just stepped back. Oh, okay. Yeah. More than a couple of people ran into Will Smith, just, you know, like our saw him doing his thing around. And Will Smith, I heard you're crazy now. What's up with that?

No, not just my kids, man. Oh, okay. He's going to play System Shot. But like, yeah, whatever. It was a fucking movie set and I'm going to say there. Yeah. And more, and what was cool was on the bus rides, of course you have a lot of fucking downtime.

So I got to consume a lot of shit. A comic that I want you guys will probably like, and man, this is actually something you'd like as well. No, we were talking about how Swarie was once his new game to be a detective girl that masturbates. Detective public masturbator. To use her powers to solve problems. You're right.

I do like these things. So that comes on right after Bitch Hunter. So there's this comic called Sex Criminals and it's fucking great. It starts out where just this girl that discovers that when she slicks off and she has that magic moment, time stops. Okay, literally. And she discovers this as a kid and literally she stops time. Okay.

And as a kid, she figures this out and it's like, but doesn't know that it's not normal. Because it's like not something you can explain to her. And it's sex. So it's taboo. And even if you said, oh man, it's like time stops, you know. So it's this great thing of like, I guess that's normal and whatnot. And eventually when she realizes it's not, but she has the power to stop time by coming to orgasm.

And then eventually, you know, fooling around as a 20-something eventually hooks up with a guy and they both finish. And it's like, wait, how are you here? And why didn't you freeze? Oh, shit. And then plots and stuff. Time to rob some banks. Yeah.

Well, did you read about? No. They rob banks. Yeah. The first thing people do when they discover time powers is rob banks. Exactly. So, and that's where this goes. I've got a comic with the opposite premise where-

What? When time stops, you have an orgasm? These two people who loved each other, when they were close together, time stopped. And time didn't resume until they went further away from each other. And for a long, like, and over time, it became a bigger and bigger distance. And eventually one of them had to like- Go away from- Yeah, exactly.

That's a really good premise. And it ends where they're- They can't possibly get together. They show up at the guy's parents place and they're 20 years older and they have a kid. Yeah. And that's how it ended. So, who puts this out? Who publishes this?

Uh... I don't know, but it's in the book over there. Well, not more than a decent action. I bet if you ask Swerry about this comic, he'll say you never read it. Well, we'll talk about it. But it's just like, it's just proof that, you know, that could be used as a device. And it's actually a really good comic. And-

I'm in a weird place where I go up to a comic book store. I'm like, can I have the new gem, the new Archie versus Predator? And the new, like, my selection- New Time Masterbader, please. Time Masterbader, please. The one little tidbit I'll give you that is- Kaiju Max. Yeah, Kaiju Max.

The one little tidbit I'll give you is, like, when the girl, like, comes up with it and goes through her life, it's a thing where, like, a lot of the other things in her life are really shitty. So she calls this frozen time the quiet. Sure. You know, it's the one time where she can just, like, be on her own and collect her thoughts and get through. How can you move inside the frozen time? Yeah, and then eventually, like, well, that's part of the story thing, right? And then, like, when she meets up with the guy that does it, he's like, you call it the quiet?

Yeah. Why? What do you call it? And it cuts back to him looking at his first porn shop, and it's called Come World. And he's like, uh... Not here at all. Yeah. So, yeah.

Yeah. Roll with that. That's pretty funny. No, and I went through the Bossy Pants Tina Fey. Tina Fey book that came out a while ago. Okay. And the Sarah Silverman The Bedwetter books, both of which are hilarious and good, and you should check them out. Okay.

They're good books. Do you own them? Yeah, I bought them. Okay, maybe I'll borrow them, yeah. Good stuff. And that's perfect, like, reading material for six to eight-hour bus rides. Yeah, I guess so. You know, what are you gonna do?

Mm-hmm. That's it. Do nothing. Yeah. Yeah, okay. Last week, I was really busy, so I didn't get to play as many games as I wanted, unfortunately, especially not The Witcher, which I wouldn't play. How much nep-nep did you play, motherfucker?

I played, like... Tell the story that we were walking out of the fucking nep-nep. We're walking out of the place. We're walking out of the place, and Pat's like, so you played The Witcher? And I'm like, yeah, I played it for, like, three hours. And I'm like, yeah, but I played way more Neptunia U. It's so good. And I go, what? Didn't you just spend last week shitting all over those kinds of games?

No. I've been building up The Witcher 3 for a month now. And then this guy goes, yeah, I like them. All those games are different. I like this nep-nep game. And I go, fuck you, you piece of shit. And then you ran away. I ran away.

Then you ran away. Yeah, I got some time in the new Neptunia. Fuck you! It's a spin-off. It's an action game. It's fun. I like it. It's camp shit.

Call her nep-nep. Nep-nep. She's nep-nep. None. By saying nep-nep. None. Say Neptunia. When you have a friend, you call him the nickname.

Matt McMussles. That's longer than just saying Matt McMussles. Yeah, well, when you have a friend with a nickname. Sure. Yeah. I don't have many friends that have cool nicknames. I know you don't. Do we have a, do we, do any of us know anyone named Ting?

I know a guy named, I know a guy named the Yellow Dart. Yeah. But yeah, this week was all, it was all just moving. So I was just moving furniture. You moved in? My whole apartment. No, my girlfriend moved in. But she's moved in now.

She's moved in now. The apartment's still a mess. There's still boxes everywhere, but whatever it's done. I remember all our boxes, they stuck around for like two months. Yeah. I have boxes in my home that I've never unpacked because I found out after moving in that I don't have enough bookcases for these books. So these books are going to stay packed.

Exactly. I got the most beautiful mahogany bookcases this weekend. Mahogany. Gorgeous. They're right to the ceiling. They're the tallest bookshelves I've ever had. I can barely reach the top shelf. They're amazing.

Gotta be careful loading those in. They don't get too top heavy. They took hours to get into the apartment. It was a fucking nightmare. Well, it's not a good bookshelf unless it's a size that will sufficiently kill you if it falls on you. Yeah, exactly. That's when you know it's a good case.

That's when you know all bookshelves would kill me. Yeah, that's true. As a kid, I had bookshelves on the other side of my bed and I was always terrified of them falling on me. Watch out for that paperback, Pat. I had a chance to sit down and play all of Burning Rangers, which I really love. What? What were you asking me about?

You were like saying, oh yeah, you wanted the Saturn card thing. I borrowed the action replay for the Saturn. And that game uses the Saturn. I have a Japanese disc because the English disc is like a hundred something dollars. So that's Burning Rangers. It's interesting. What's it about? It's kind of rough.

It's by Sonic Team and of course they never actually... It's the firefighters game. No, but for the fucking listeners. Yeah. Oh, sorry. It's by Sonic Team. There's a legit chance you don't know what that is. Yeah, exactly.

To be fair. It's by Sonic Team who famously made like three Saturn games, but no Sonic games on the Saturn. It's really good. It's a third person action game where you play as space firemen and you go in and you turn out the space fires and you save people. And you sometimes save dolphins and orca whales. And let's not think about the fact that you're putting out space fire. Yeah.

Like don't even just play games. Space fire is a real thing. All of that shit fucking lit on fire. Do you ever see the sun? In Fireball. It's gotta be one of the most impressive Saturn games. It doesn't make sounds too. Like graphically it's really, really impressive.

Dude, fire defector makes noise no matter where it is because it has to have something to burn, which means there's a medium. Yeah. Okay, but when you see an explosion in space in a movie, go fuck yourself. No, you're not supposed to hear anything. No, silent as the night. It's a really good game. The sun.

I have like one big gripe with it. It uses the circle controller. Yeah, the analog one for the Saturn. Circle pad pro. But it only uses it in eight directions, which is like just as good as a D-pad. Is that standard for that thing? That thing has no standards. I don't think it was true.

That thing worked. It wasn't true analog. Okay. N64s was the first true analog. I assumed it would have at least 16 directions. Dude, that thing is like. And I was really bummed by that. That thing was only even used by like knights and burning rangers and like.

It was really, really fun to play through. I don't think it emulates well, so good luck. You know, there's well more than enough for like a firefighting week. I'm shocked at the amount of firefighting. Dude, we've had the discussion. And good one. Didn't I already pitch it to you and buy all the games? I don't know if you guys know that discussion.

I bought a bunch of them. But firefighters are like huge heroes. I didn't even care about firefighting. But we've talked about this already. Not on camera. Because we don't use audio camera. We spoil it, but alright. I guess that's out there.

There's no plan. There's no weird ethical conundrum to putting out fucking fires. And guess what? Rosamania just coming out. Everyone knows. Only if the week ends in backdrafts. We gotta watch backdrafts. So like the game is really good.

I'll lend it to you if you want to play it. Sentient fire. You'll play through it once. It's four missions and you're done. There's some movie where they're like the fire is thinking. Shut the fuck up. Suck my dick. He just said it.

It just goes in. Not backdraft. I heard you say backdraft. There's something else aside from that where the fire is thinking. Oh, Firestorm with Howie Long or whatever. The football guy. Firestorm. Shut up, William.

Okay. And I played Puzzle and Dragon Z and Puzzle and Dragon's Super Mario Edition. How are those? Puzzle and Dragon Z is fun. It's great. It's really enjoyable. They added a lot of shit to it that just isn't in the mobile game like a story. And there's no mobile shit anywhere.

Exactly. The Super Mario Brothers one is built off the back of that. So they put new art in and they improved it a little bit. This is the same. But they stripped out the story and the exploration. So it's now just a like dry level based thing with really ugly Mario art. Ugly new Super Mario Brothers art. It's the 3D stuff that's like flattened to like to be like Sprite-ish.

Yeah, you could clearly see it's 3D. So what you're saying is that Z is the winner of the package. Z is the easy winner of the package. And it's a bummer because the demo on the eShop is only the Mario side. Well, I mean, it makes more sense to do that. It makes way more sense. Like people will buy it for Mario and not for that. It's good.

If you want to play a good modern puzzle game because we don't get many of them anymore. Free from the shackles of mobile. Yeah, exactly. I'm super happy. I read this fucking post on the internet that made me throw up the other day. What? A post on the internet made you upset? I know. Talking about mobile games and like their sales and stuff in the media create threads.

And this is one guy that near a lack. You know that guy, right? Yeah, near a lack. You made this post about how like if Terra Battle wants to do better, they have to have another pull event soon. And I was like, oh my god, kill yourself for saying that. What's a pull event? It's the events where it's like,

and now you can randomly get this super rare guide by doing the gacha of millions. Oh yeah. And it's like just, just kill yourself. Even suggesting that a company make more money by just like squirting more scum into the game. Like fuck, squirting more scum. I'm so depressed, yeah. For life. And the Japanese market's at a low.

It sucks cause Terra Battle. That hasn't hit since 2004. And ooh. It sucks cause Terra Battle still has like the really solid awesome art style that I love from Miss Walker just in a packaging. No, it has really good art, but they invited a guest artist on who did some old Sonic stuff and he put in some terrible crossover. Of course.

Speaking of Miss Walker. It's not even Sonic. It's original monsters. They're just terrible. Speaking of Miss Walker and awesome art, just starting to drop, but did you guys catch that the one-on-one game that we played, the artist, is actually Takiko Inoue, the guy that draws fucking Vagabond? Shit.

I thought when you put it in the thumbnail art, it looks familiar, but I couldn't catch it. Did you catch that? That's just a simple series game. I totally, yeah. Oh, okay. I didn't know. That's the thing. I didn't know what that was.

It's a budget game. He just held it up and went, what is this? They have a number next to the name and that's the price of the game. Yep. Simple 1500. I tried wiki-ing it. Couldn't find a wiki entry on it and just went through threads to go, what is this series thing?

Yeah. No, I get you. We've got a couple, like we've got like Project Minerva and the gun shooting in the background. The gun shooting. The gun shooting. This is the basket. Everything is plus something. I have like two versions of Project Minerva.

Well, there was Earth Defense Force and Ona Chambara came out of that. Now they're their own giant multi-billion AAA industries. The billion dollar franchise. Yeah. It's great to sound like we know what we're talking about after the video goes live. Everyone tells us what's in the list. That's how we do it. That's how we coast.

You want a good fucking bunch of somebody who doesn't know what they're talking about? Listen to Pat. Hey. So, Woolly. Hey. My statements on Superman have been well known and documented that I don't like Superman. Okay. Have they been reinforced?

Before you go anywhere. Just pause. Two questions. What's the questions? Leave me. Did you read All Star Superman? He did. Is that what this is about?

Yes. Okay. What's question two? Two. Did you read it with the, did you read it leaning back going, all right, impress me? Or did you read it going comic book? No. Hold on.

Man, Liam just doesn't know. Just a note. Just a frame where you're coming. I had a whole set up here. I had a whole fucking set up here. My thoughts on Superman are known. I think he's boring. I hate him.

Okay. And I don't know pretty much anything about Superman's world or anything like that. That isn't Batman. You know a lot about Bizarro. Yeah. Sure. And Crypto is a super dog and shit like that. So last week we, and we had a discussion about how like we were, I was hating on DC or whatever.

It's like, what do you want? What do you guys want from me? What do you want? Do you want me to read the things that everyone tells me to read and then for me to not like them? Will that make you happy? And then like, you know, a little bit of like, I don't know what tipped me off, but there was some comment somewhere.

I was like, fuck it. Fine. I'm going to. There's a conversation with a Twitter guy. Everyone tells me to fucking read All Star Superman. Fine. Fuck you. I'm going to read All Star Superman.

That attitude already makes me go. Oh, but wait. No, no, no, no. It's fine. It's continued. Is that not good enough for you either? That's totally okay. That's totally okay.

So I went and I read it all in like that because it's not long. I sat down and I read it like that, no problem. That's a bit easy. And All Star Superman is a pretty fun Superman story that I enjoyed the read. Yay. It's super weird and that's what I want out of this. It's just the ultimate super, super weird. And what I mentioned last week about that one panel I've ever seen that makes me like Superman.

I can't hear Pa's heartbeat. Yeah, and I can save him. I can save everyone. Yeah. The one time that Superman from all the stuff I've seen acts like an actual goddamn human being and not like a god-like Christ figure. And then a few pages later when the bandages come off. Okay.

So, right? Yeah. I liked All Star Superman. I think it was a fun comic to read. More than anything though, it has made me hate Superman more than anything. Superman is, everything in Superman's world exists to make Superman more boring. Everything about him is boring. Everything he does is boring.

Oh, I'm so perfect. I beat these two guys in the arm wrestling competition. I created life to fuck it. I'm perfect in every way, in every situation, no matter what. I always did the right thing. I planned for myself to die and come back in just this moment and it's... Oh, he sucked so bad. He's so horrible.

Jimmy Olsen, however, is awesome. Yeah. Lex Luthor is the greatest ever. So, I don't think All Star Superman was trying for this, but there are huge portions of that story in which Soops is telling Lex, hey man, do whatever or save the world or find you win or just whatever, Lex. And Lex's response is continuously to go, fuck you, Superman. Yes.

Fuck your shit. You alien piece of garbage. You ruined the whole earth. And you fucked with our destiny. Every time, I'm like, yeah, Lex, you tell him. Lex is so right. Lex is so right about Superman. Okay.

Because the thing is, there's a moment where you're like, well, two things happen when you read this book, right? And it's like, you either get what they're trying to do or you don't because it's quietly, right, frankly. And it's like, the way you open it up and you have your, okay, Dooms Planet, Baby Save Earth, Smallville, like we know, move on. Everyone knows. Right.

And then you get right into it. And it's like, so there's this fucking space colony with projects and like this fucker and a technical or dream code. And just the weirdest batshit crazy shit from the Golden Age era. All things are canon. Right. And they're not shying away from this weird old shit. They're embracing it and making it all about that.

I could appreciate that. And I did. People either reject that and go, this is fucking stupid. No, I love that. Or you just buy that. That was my favorite part. Okay. It's like when they, the old Bruce Timm's Batman show where they did the fucking flash

bat, the mix and match episode. To the old shit. Yeah. Where they had the old joke or something like that. I love that shit. This is embracing all the stupid stuff. But Clark, as a character, is so boring. He's so, every person around him is more interesting than him.

Crypto is more interesting. Ma and Paquette are so much more interesting. Jimmy Olsen and Lois and fucking Perry White and whoever the fuck Lombardo is. I don't know who that guy is. There are so much more interesting. Zabarro is more interesting than fucking Superman. Because Superman is perfect and normal and does no wrong and always knew everything to do in every situation.

I can't stand him. Every page that Lex was on the... But you know what it is. I'll read Lex Luthor comics now. But you know what it is though. Here's what it is. Here's what it... What?

What's going on there? Okay, you're good. What it is, is this. Superman, in a room with any of those characters, you can have a scene. In a room by himself, you have no scenes. Right? Yeah. Chrono, in a room by himself, do you have a scene?

No. No. But Chrono, surrounded by the Chrono Trigger cast, you get one of the greatest fucking adventures ever. Yeah. Okay. It's that type of story. Yeah, but Chrono doesn't suck.

Yeah, exactly. But Superman doesn't suck. No, he sucks. But the ensemble is definitely amazing. No, he sucks. They make it, yeah. And in the same sense that Superman is like the guy that's like, I can fucking solve the problems, but the other characters that surround me are what make this a good story.

Then why is it when I played Chrono Trigger, I wasn't going, oh, I think Chrono's so much. Because you didn't spend your childhood with everybody in the world going off about Chrono for every issue that would come out every week. That's true. So terrible. Your life was perp- The most interesting thing Superman ever did was die. Your life has been filled with Superman.

Your life has not been filled with Chrono. You have one memory of that from being a kid. There's two interesting things. But do you see the panel? Yeah, I see it. But there are two interesting things that Superman can do. Go evil. He's always interesting when he's evil because that character makes more sense than the character

that he is. Or die. Yeah. Those are the only two interesting things that he can actually do. What's the most interesting thing Chrono ever did? Save the world from Lavos. Die. Yeah.

In a really awesome way. No, I'd say the most interesting thing he did was like come back to life. If Chrono Trigger came out in the 40s. And you've been hearing about all your friends. There's been t-shirts of his Chrono Trigger fucking mop head on everyone's chest. And people are getting Chrono Trigger tattoos. You know what I mean? You see it's that type of thing.

It's not garbage, dude. It's a different kind of comic. But the writing is what makes it. But the writing makes me hate Superman more. Every page is me hating Superman more. Because every page is him succeeding at something perfectly. Every single page. He didn't do a single.

He didn't stub his fucking toe wrong unless it was on purpose when he was Clark Kent. Like, Superman's perfection is my problem. Okay. And that's why I think Lex is so amazing because that's his problem. Like Superman's flaw is that he's too perfect. That's not a trait that Chrono or others share. And he came from a time when all that you needed was a man to be awesome to sell a comic book. And that's why his character should have never made it past 1960.

And that's why I disagree. And I say I think that a good writer that takes that premise and makes it fun to read. So is the guy who wrote All Star Superman a good writer? Yeah. But here's the thing. There are scenes in All Star Superman in which Superman is not on the page. Those are awesome. Okay.

No. Right. Dude. The instant Superman walks into the thing. Oh, he's going to perfectly solve the problem. I totally, like, no. I know. But the thing is that, like, I find that knowing that means that part of the story is kind of about that.

That's Superman's boring? No, not Superman's boring. But, like, he has a solution. But what else is happening here? You know? And why is he even in the page? Shouldn't he just be off solving the problem while we look at interesting things? Well, it's not always as clean cut as that, obviously, because you've got, like, the time shit that gets involved at that point.

It's not just the saving of the day. Because in many cases, he saves the day in one punch. But it's, like, the emotional aspect of what's happening or the conversation that's happening. Superman has the one emotional moment and everything else is, like, man, I'm the best. Well, look, I'm not going to tell you, hey, you should like a character you don't like. Okay, let me ask you a question. I do think that. Did you ever know anyone in school that was perfect?

Well, no, no, it's perfect. No, but appeared perfect. The person who had perfect grades was the top. It was super popular. I did. It was super awesome. Awesome girl. Oh, that's perfect straight A's.

Back to you. He did everything correctly. Yeah, sure. How much did you hate them? Not very. I didn't hate them. See, this is where it comes from. I hated them.

I wanted them to, like, fucking get blasted off to space every day. Because the perfect person demeans your life by existing. So you are, Lex. Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Totally. Lex is super successful because I'm billionaire. Do you think, then, if that perfect person didn't exist, that you would have been in that spot?

Because Lex's whole deal is, if you weren't around, I would have been. I wouldn't have been. I wouldn't have been. I would. It's not that you would be in that spot, but if the number one person could be at least somebody that had perceptible flaws, I could live with it. Like, you think you're Krillin saying, fuck off, go to hell. No, no. Get off our planet, aliens.

It's my issue with people that don't have perceptible flaws. If you don't have any perceptible flaws and appear to be perfect, I don't trust you. Yeah, but you can just make him shave with, like, kryptonite. Yeah, sure. Sure. So he does have flaws. I know this is, like, Pat. Like, Batman screwed up and horrible.

And he fucks up all the time. To nail the perfection point home, the story starts with him getting even more invincible. I know! Sorry, Landry. I was so happy at the beginning of that story when it's like, oh, he's double-perfect. And then you cut back to Lex going, gonna die in three weeks. I did it. Better not shoot me with that kryptonite laser.

That's dangerous. Oh, wait, it did nothing. Like, I haven't read All-Star Superman, but I've read a bunch of other just individual Superman comics. And the thing I really dislike about Superman is it's such... Writers have such a challenge writing Superman, because they have to think of some smart way to make a Superman comic interesting. And if you're a good writer, you can do it. I resent that, because you could spend the same amount of time making an original story more interesting.

So that's part of my bigger problem is that... I think that people... Like, I wish Superman would just... Yeah, but that's just easy. Those writers are... That's right, easy way out. People are choosing to... You say, oh, I'm gonna take my easy story.

Yeah. Like, I'd see a writer going, I want to be challenged by making an interesting story. Dude, like, every sequel to every game you like could have been an original game. I know. It was totally unique. But those are games! But the people creating them chose to work on it because they wanted to. So people want to write Superman.

Well, yeah, I'm not saying that. I'm just saying I hate how, like, there's this character... The character who's been around for 70 years. Yes! Who people keep trying to take cracks at. And this is my longer-running thing with life. If it was beautiful, Joe, too, I'd get you. And you're like, well, they could have done something different.

And it's like, yeah, but they chose to do the second one. This is Superman 5000! Of course. Yeah, that's being generous. And that's my bigger thing with comics. It's like, you know, I read the manga, Full Metal Optimus, and I loved it. You know why? Because it started, it fucking went, and it ended.

And it was over. And then it continues. Anyway, I just think... The franchise is not dead. Yes, it is. It continues on. No, I mean that there's still going to be adaptations and stuff and merch and things. It doesn't go away.

I think, I just think... No, but... It's done, though. But there's no new Full Metal Alchemist stories. Yeah, but there could be. But there aren't. But the art is the point that he's getting at. But there could be.

But there aren't! But there could be, like, the play of the games, the play of the games that have completely different stories. Okay. I mean, it's not a thing that just stops and ends. You can say that it does and you're, like, technically correct. But then you can spin off into a whole bunch of them. Yes, we are technically correct. Okay, I'm just saying that, like, I feel that, like, the writing about an invincible person,

like, you're writing about a god, trying to tell a story about a god, is very difficult. And I think that, like, that's kind of what I appreciate in the good, well-written Superman stories. And in the bad ones, yeah, you get fucking horse shit. Because it's just not, it's boring. I'm gonna save the day! I'm gonna punch him really hard! I'm gonna punch him! The people that are writing about him kind of don't realize that you need outside elements.

They just don't succeed for whatever reason. Exactly. And the thing is, is that there's other comics out there where you have similarly omnipotent characters, but they're amazing comics. Do you know Sandman? But it's, like, I would rather read the exact same thing. You know DC Sandman? No, I know the name.

Okay, Sandman is fucking legendary. He's nigh invincible in most of the issues you read with him. And it's like, it's still interesting because of what's happening outside of this character. Yeah. It's like the character is almost like a force, as opposed to a person. No, that does sound really interesting. And the thing is that, you know, and you have different types of stories that address characters in these ways where it's like, yeah, omnipotence is here, but then what?

No, that sounds really interesting. So, like, when did Sandman end? Well, did it end? Yes. It was inherently more interesting. And well, all Star Superman ended, right? No. This is an argument I've had with you, and you ignored everything they said.

No, no, no, no, no, no. No. Runs are not self-contained, okay? Superman started that fucking 40 whatever and continues to exist to this day. But is Spectacular Spider-Man the same as Amazing Spider-Man? No. The same as, you know, every other run of Spider-Man. And certain point, yes.

No, they're not. And they're actually... And they're absolutely right here. Runs are all different, but I still think... And here's what it comes down to, is that a writer and an artist sit down and create an arc or a closed book or whatever it is, and it begins and it ends, right? Yeah. And the ultimates, as like the Avengers, for example, began and ended and is a self-contained

Avengers story that we go, hey, this is awesome, read this, right? Those characters, because they're Marvel characters, will continue to show up in Marvel Comics in different things. Yeah, of course. But readers of comics, no. No one's acting as if it's a giant timeline that's going forward and it's not. It should be. Well, no, but now you're doing your own thing.

I'm telling you the reason why people like these things and go, oh, that's not shit. That's pretty good, is because writers and artists come together and make a contained thing, and it's a self-standing piece of work. Writers and artists should make their own characters. So, like... They dangled image. Awful. So, we can't keep going with this, because this is going to take too long.

What about JoJo? What about Presert? So does all fiction need to be exactly the same? No, no, no. No, no, no. Hold on. No, no, no. No, no, no.

No, no, no. No, no, no. It's not that. No, no. Here's the thing. Here's the problem. Dude, Matt Pat, you're totally right about the fact that it's like when you have a guided direction, you get something awesome with that.

But unfortunately, the mainstream comic books industry in the West and the manga industry develop different paths. And I wish that you could have a dude sit down and just make a manga because you know that guy's fucking good and you can trust him. But unfortunately, the mangaka own their characters and their worlds and everything, whereas the characters are owned by the company. And it just, it develops two different industries where the fiction is treated differently. Yes.

And everything- It's unfortunate. And all I say is that the comic version of that I think is terrible. Well, and you know, but here's the thing. No one will ever tell you this character is awesome, like implying every issue that has ever come out is a great read and you need to sit and read them all. People always tell you go read this trade or this run or this contained story because that's where the quality comes out.

If someone tells you James Bond is very cool, right? If someone recommends you a James Bond thing, are they telling you to literally go back and read every single James Bond book and watch every movie? I think the point- I think you split the movies in the books, but in that case, yes, I've seen almost every James Bond movie. But are they telling you, hey, check out this one story, you know, or check out this contained thing?

That's what it kind of consists of. I think we've deviated a bit from the point, which is just Superman's too fucking perfect and he's not, I don't enjoy reading him. And he's not like Chrono. And James Bond is more interesting than Superman because he fucks up and he's not perfect. Okay. And he gets caught in death traps with lasers coming into his head. Here's my branch in the works is I'm going to say Superman is not a character.

He's a genre. X-Men are a genre. Mutants. I think that's on you. No, but like if you think about it, like if this is a category that has different entries of stories underneath it, you kind of see what I'm approaching here. No, I'm right. This character is just a label that has multiple stories underneath it.

You know what, Willie? You're right. You can win an argument if you just change what words mean. Okay. All right. This character is a character. You know what? It's clearly not.

But I'm talking about the mentality. I'm talking about the mentality. If you do anything else in your weeks. Dude. Yeah. I'm just talking about the mentality and like why do you look at something. No, it's just you're fighting. Like Pat says he doesn't like something and you're fighting him to make his opinion.

Which is okay. No, no. The first thing I said. No, the first thing I said. No, the Chrono thing. Okay. No, Liam. Come on.

But just now I said I don't want to tell you, hey, don't have that opinion. Like that's not what I'm doing. I think that like the view on how comics go on forever and it's just bullshit and stuff. It's like, yeah, you can look at things and kind of go, you know, JoJo is one guy and it's his team and they're going to have a consistency to it. And sadly, Western comics just don't fucking have that. But. Okay.

That's all I wanted. That's it. Yeah. That's all I wanted. You said sadly you can't get that. No, you're right. It's okay. Because okay.

That's all that's happening is that I take my opinion of this is the way to do it. And that's average. The bad way to do it is awful. And you take it as like, oh, this is preferred and this is unfortunate, but. No, it's shitty, but you and you pick and choose the good shit. Yeah. And then you get some good shit, you know, and that's, and that's what comics have been like.

Remember, you're talking to someone who can't watch Doctor Who. Right. Because the old episodes are gone. If someone said to me tomorrow X-Men will be finished, I'll be like, that sucks. Because it's such an analogy that's perfect for every generation of people being outcast. And I think it fucking is awful. And someone goes, I wish it just ended. You say that about a bunch of shit.

You don't think that new things could ever be as good as X-Men? I think when the analogy is so perfect that outcasts are ostracized from society, I think it sucks. If that ends, it's applicable in almost every generation. If I had my absolute perfect world, I would like a world where. Professor X. I'd like a world where. I just think it's really short-sighted.

I would like a world where. You asked for stuff to stop all the time. These things you've been around for? What have I asked for? Capcom. Capcom what? Period. You asked for things shut and sega.

Short-sighted? And like a bunch of sega games in the past. All the characters we've been talking about. Don't do that to me. You've said this way. All the characters we have discussed today have existed before any of us were born. I think that like in an ideal world, the X-Men that we grew up with and knew and loved would kind of hit a closed arc and the new X-Men would come about.

And that's sort of JoJo chapter one to two. That's the ultimate. In a perfect world, it would be like this is the legacy. And when people think about Wolverine or Phoenix or those moments. They think about the things they did at that peak. And you don't sort of have the diluting of quality of shit writers. It would be nice to not have the pool corrupted in an ideal world. But knowing that that doesn't happen and knowing that we still like comic books.

Well, to some degree. I mean, you know, we're not as hardcore about it as we are about video games, I think. It's like we're stuck with a world where we have to pick and choose what's good. And I think as long as we continue to do that, we can enjoy what we read. Wolverine origin. You go read that and then you read Wolverine the End, for example. Wolverine the End is a piece of shit. Wouldn't it be nice if every Wolverine story was good?

And all followed one centralized timeline? It would. It would. Wouldn't that be nice? It would, you know. I'm asking that specifically. I guess, but when a character is created in like the 70s, it's not going to happen. And that's unfortunate.

In America. In America. I guess. Because I'm trying to think of like another character that's like, maybe something European perhaps where... Yeah, we're not 10-10. The character is... Our knowledge doesn't hit Europe very well. Yeah, but like a character handled by multiple people.

You know what I mean? But not within a Western comic book structure. Also issues coming out in like little issues as the equivalent of a giant tankobon. You know where you get like multiple tankobon, whatever. I'm starting to take up so much time with this. No, no, but I'm actually... It's an interesting discussion, I think, because it's totally true. But I just think though, at the same time, if your conclusion becomes therefore fuck comic,

that's crazy. Isn't that silly? The inability to get a complete story bothers me immensely. It's not. I think like the best way to enjoy it is to treat it like any other medium where friends go, yo, check out this anime. Yo, check out this movie. Yo, check out this read.

But I just want to like to Matt your point. To Daredevil, for example, right? There's a bunch of stuff, like the opening of that Daredevil comic that I read. I liked it just fine, but referenced huge amounts of events. Daredevil getting turned into like a zombie cyber, the fucking evil ninja. And all sorts of hands. What's a good movie or like our TV series where it's like, you could tell people, check this thing out, but you have like a million asterises to give them.

What do you mean? Like, okay, get into Star Trek. But keep in mind. Just watch the original series, TNG, Deep Space Nine, and then stop. Well, but you know what I mean? You kind of go like, okay, well, then just Voyagerra, and then there's Enterprise. No, with the movies. Which movies are good?

TNG is easy because you just stop. You watch them up until a date in time, and then you just stop. I thought about it. I'm like, though, Star Trek, it's a bit like both, but it's closer to JoJo in that sense. And you can kind of go, well, just don't read that chapter, you know, or whatever. But I can't really think of a perfect parallel with it. Miss Roddenberry died at some point. Of course.

Because he wrote Earth from a conflict, and that just took the life out of him. And unfortunately, Miss Roddenberry has also passed, which means that the amount of new Star Trek fiction that can be created is very limited. That's the voice of the computer now has said everything that the computer is ever going to say. Yeah, so did you read Tech War? I did not read Tech War. All right, well, what else did you do?

I played F of 14. Nobody wants to hear about it, so I'm just going to skip over it. Are you excited for Heaven's Word? I'm extremely excited for Heaven's Word. And I know it's not in the show notes because it's news that no one would care about, but it was really funny to watch the live letter about, hey, we're going to do flying mounts. It's going to be so cool. And like three days later, World of Warcraft announces, flying mounts screwed up the game.

We're going to never make any more flying areas. Hold on a second. Let me just. I seem to make a note of the time because I actually want to let people know that we talk about comics for a while. If you totally don't want to hear it. If you actually like comics, skip this one. I apologize to anyone that's annoyed by that.

Let's jump to it this time. Take away Superman sucks, Lex Luthor, and Jimmy Olsen are radical. Would you read a series that was specifically just super dickery stories? Absolutely. I would as well. Absolutely. And All Star Superman was close, but not quite. Like how rock hard did you get at Jimmy Olsen Doomsday?

It was great. It was fucking dumb super watch. Oh, it's great. I think that there was a lot of World of Warcraft fans saying it was good that they were stopping the flying thing going forward because it removed a lot of the challenge in the new area. Yeah, so the explanation they used for that is that they would design levels and well, you used to have to break a prisoner out of a camp, but now you just fucking pop your mountain flying and grab the guy.

So like I read quite a few accounts of people saying, yeah, this is going to be a good change, which interested me because I thought it was going to be universally negative. No, and the problem with that is that it started in Burning Crusade and they built those levels around being able to fly. And that makes a lot of sense. And then they never built levels around being able to fly ever again, but still let you fly. So all their levels would be shit after that.

And with Heaven's Word, what they're going to do is you're going to have to sync up to a bunch of places. So you'll have to have completely explored the area anyway before you can fly. And then you need to fly to get to high up stuff. And they're going to design areas like that. At the time of Burning Crusade, you had to be like capped out to get that shit, right? Yeah, pretty hard. You had to beat the game.

It was a hell of a reward. And now it's like midway through your game. No, no, no. Now you get it at the start of the game, which is level 70. We take Cataclysm like where they redid the whole world. Like you could fly really, really early in Cataclysm and like they did not design any of the fucking new leveling world around being able to fly. So that problem was rampant.

It was crazy bad. But yeah, Heaven's Word looks like it's going to. So yeah, just stats. I'm I-108 and I have a 30 alt as well. I tip up to level 30 alt. Good job. You're doing well. And the free company is now huge.

It's now super huge. There's like almost 200 people in it. So whoa, fucked up. That game's really good. What can I say? It's fucking amazing. As for other video games that I actually put time into, I've played a lot of The Witcher. Of course.

And you played at least a little. Talked to me at least a little. I played a couple hours. First thing I did was jump off the balcony. Oh yeah. First thing I did. And discovered them. Gerald's fall damage.

Okay, you can't keep saying Gerald. Gerald. It's Gerald's man. Gerald's fall damage. Okay. I like Gerald better. Okay, Gerald's. God damn it, Jerry.

So this is something that's driven me crazy for the longest time. And I remember when the Tomb Raider was coming out. A lot of people were calling it Lara or Laura. And it drove me nuts. That's just wrong. Because it was whatever. It's some video game's person's name. It's like, no, this is a name that is real.

That exists. Yeah. And Gerald probably is a name that exists as well. Anyway, at the beginning of The Witcher 3. You jump off that balcony. Jeremy is fucking fragile. And he can't take no. Nothing.

Gerald's fall damage is some absurd cartoon shit. It is unbelievable. You fucking die if you fall the length of your body. Alright, here we go. Mullen, you game designed. It's crazy. A jump man game where your own jump height kills you. Yeah.

There's one jump. Liam and I. You can get all day forever. But you'll die. Liam and I were. Mighty Bomb Jack as we took fall damage. Liam and I were talking about like a specific ridge near a banded fort in the early game. Where you just fall off.

It looks like a three foot fall and you fall off. And like 90% of your life is gone. And it's just what the fuck. That starts to go away as you level. And guess what? That first zone drops nearly disappear. Instead you start to slide down areas. Okay.

That's not so bad. Boy that game is shiny. Wooly. You asked me a while ago when you first got your PC. What game to put in it to make it go shiny. Pretty nice game. The benchmark. It's this one.

If he can run it. It's really high. It's really demanding. It's not that demanding. I thought it was very demanding. My computer can run it. What's your card? You know this.

No don't mess with the things. It was in the first 0th percentile of systems out there. So it's not a 970. It's probably like a 780 or something like that. Yeah you'll play it just fine. It is the fucking most gorgeous game I've ever seen. It's unbelievable. Games.

Where do I start on this? Fuck. Imagine if Skyrim had really good writing and good combat. Like that. Leave all the other menials shit in but that. And they've actually fully succeeded on the choices actually mattering. This is the first game I've actually of this scope that's actually done it. So I'll give an early example that isn't too spoiler-ish.

You go into a bar and dudes hassle you. And your options are fuck them up. Say something to back off or just let it roll off you. Right. And the bartender's going man can you not. Can you just. Quit doing this shit. Calm down.

And you go fine. You tell them you're a witcher and they all go when they back off. Right. And he goes man thanks. I appreciate you not causing trouble in my bar. As you're about to walk away from them. They turns out that they're the local Barons men and they start telling a story. And it is the most disgusting story I have heard in a game in a long time.

It is how they're going house to house looking for farmer's daughters. And how one of the local farmers like dressed one of his daughters up like a boy. I think haha I showed him though. And you I'm immediately awash with oh I should have killed these guys. These guys are pieces of shit. They're fucking awful. Fine. Whatever.

I do the story thing in the bar. I leave dudes are going door to door in the town doing this now at the moment. And unlike every other NPC in the game you can draw your sword and kill them. So fuck it. They're all dead. You continue along with the main quest only find out I can't even get into a city. Because that those were this guy's dudes. And he's mad about it.

So okay there's your change. There's the thing that actually changed. So I sneak in I get into the fucking prompt whatever I continue the main quest. He's mad at me but he'll forgive me whatever. Continue on. Find a bunch of dudes trying to burn down a guy's home. Okay fine. I've caused enough problems.

I'm going to try to convert. Calm down guys. What's wrong? Oh he gave your buddy a medicine that made him sick. Okay. I know medicine. I'll help your buddy. So how do you know medicine?

He's like oh I'm a witcher. A witcher huh? So you're that guy that killed our boys. Okay well that side quest is gone now. Why would Jeremy- Is this fucking written by telltale? Why would Jeremy tell people by now that he's a witcher? Was that?

Why would he even give that information when he knows- Cause I chose to tell them to get them to back off because people are scared of witchers. Usually you won't use Jeremy's mind to control power. And so I wonder if I had killed them but not said that I was a witcher would that second part of it change? Every decision makes you feel bad. It doesn't matter. And everyone in this game is a piece of shit.

Yeah you said that. They are pieces of shit. And the ones that I just described they're not even the worst pieces of shit that I ran into. You never make a decision in a game and find out that it helps you later? Like that? No no it's not as often as you'd hope. It is exclusively negative consequences no matter what. And again early early in the game it's like oh man my wife and daughter they're they're

disappeared and within five seconds you're like I have a strong suspicion I know why they disappeared man. Is it because you beat your wife's baby out of her? Well she pushes me. Motherfucker dude stop. But I need the thing so I gotta do the thing. You get to the end of that and you find one of the people. It's a heavy shit man.

You get to the end of that you find one of them you don't find the other. And the quest log changes to go find them. No it changes to continue to exhaust leads. So just go around and solve missing persons cases that may have nothing to do with this and eventually you may run into them and find this person. That's kind of weird because isn't the pull of a lot of side quests being here. Here's a side quest with a negative connotation and here's one with a positive and you choose which one you want to help out.

But they're all pieces of shit. There's no good solution. Yeah but there's no black and white. Yeah it's black. It's all gray. It's all gray. And the writing it's so intense and it's so much shit and so harsh. That I can't play it for very long periods of time because every couple, every hour you

run into like the worst thing you have ever. It's like Berserk levels of just human evil. The world of shit. Yeah the world of shit. The world of shit. The world of shit. The world of shit. I didn't even remember that in the second one.

I remembered why I stopped playing with the fucking UI. It's way too small. It's too small. I'm playing on a giant TV. I'm very curious. I saw some posts about it. It's really small. Incredibly small.

They're worse than Dead Rising. Yeah. Oh fix that shit. Yeah it's made for a monitor. Dead Rising was bad when you played it on a CRT because you couldn't read it. But when you were on an HDTV at least it worked right. No actually on an HDTV it was still pretty bad. Well I don't know.

Dead Rising was bad. But regardless the Witcher is, it expects you to be 14 inches away from the monitor. In the last patch they increased the size of the loot screen but nothing else. But that was the biggest problem. Yeah. So maybe they're going to work on the others in time. I hope they do. It looks amazing.

Fanpatch out there? No. What's that? Fanpatch out there? Not fanpatches. Dude. This GOG. There's already been three patches on the game since last Monday.

Okay. Yeah. But not on consoles because CERT. Of course. No I'm not talking about consoles. Yeah but this is where it's becoming like really obvious because they're fixing a lot and it's improving a lot. But CERT.

Right. And it's way behind. So amazing writing, amazing music, good combat I wouldn't say great. It feels really weird. Like running, like moving Geralt around feels really weird. He moves like a car. No like Jeremy moves like a tank. Yeah it's super weird.

He moves like a nimble tank. I like the Jeremy stuff. There's a weird super in-depth Hearthstone card game in that game. Oh I didn't know that. Yeah I saw that. That's really good. I wouldn't say as in-depth as Hearthstone. No it's not as in-depth as Hearthstone.

It's alright. It's one day we stacked back from Hearthstone but as a side quest in a big RPG like this it's really really good. Triple Triad. Triple Triad's great. It's more comparable. Deadman's Morris. I don't know that one.

It's more comparable to Triple Triad then. Yeah the fucking game from Assassin's Creed 3. Yeah. The one that only really plays. I love that game. They have what like three games a night in Assassin's Creed 2? Yeah there's Deadman's Morris, there was a couple. Yeah you played them all I remember.

There's one storyline thing that I just find like super weird because the first two games Geralt had amnesia to make people that didn't read the books because they were never translated. Not all of them were even translated in English. Such a weird problem. So they said fuck it. Geralt's good amnesia so the player has a clean slate and everyone can explain to Geralt why he's done what happened. Will he remember that he had amnesia before?

So by the end of Witcher 2 and beginning of Witcher 3 he's remembered all of it which gives you an excuse to go find characters that he only knew in the books. The pop fiction use of amnesia is so artificial. Well there's magic involved so free pass right? No I know. And so there's going to be a weird split of people who read the books and didn't read the books because in the books Geralt has a long time love interest with the main female character of this game called Yennefer.

In the beginning of the game is go find her because oh shit I forgot etc. But in the prior two games people who played the games the primary love interest was a character called Triss. Triss. And it was a long romance for that right? So now it's a situation. Will you drive off with Meryl or will you drive off with Hal? Which one do you love more? So here's where it breaks depending on whether or not you read the books or not.

If you read the books it was clear that Yennefer was the true love and they went into space together or whatever right? No seriously it's weird. But if you play the games Triss is the only character that you actually know and you probably grew to like Triss. So within like five minutes of meeting Yennefer Geralt asked um so we didn't break up. Why didn't you contact me over the years that you did not have amnesia but I did. You never tried to write you never called basically.

And her comeback is like oh I heard you and Triss made a wonderful couple. And he immediately responds with dude I had amnesia. I didn't know you existed. You can't blame me for that. You are in another dimension. So let's fix let's work the books into the canon. To be fair the female psyche will always still blame you. And then she looks at him and goes oh so that's your excuse.

See there you go. And then snaps her fingers and teleports a continent away. And Geralt just left going fuck. What was I supposed to do? What the fuck? They were on a break. They were on the most obvious amnesia fuel dimension spanning break ever. Fuck you.

Holy shit. It's hard to mend the relationship when she can teleport. Holy shit. Jeremy's problem is that he didn't use pro flowers. Holy shit. They can get anywhere. They can be there before the teleport finishes. It's been a long time since I've been in a game in which a game told me this character is important.

You should probably like this character that I took such an instant dislike to based on these events. And Tris is in the game so that's going to go that way for sure. Alright we look forward to the future adventures of Gary. I only played ten hours. Gary is the closest by far. Gary Gergich. Yep. I only played ten hours which are two but I liked Tris up until that point but I didn't play which one.

Tris is great. Tris is in there too but she's the second. I'm only calling him Gary so that next week I can call him Larry. Gary's great. I'll take Gary. I'll take Gary. Just devolve this shit. I'll keep it grabbing in the wrong way.

I will gladly take Gary over Gerald's. Well you're not going to get Gary anymore. That was the end of Gary. Fantastic games like it and Bloodborne are fighting for a game of the year in my head right now. Like early on. Bloodborne is always on my prefs. I'm always about to press X and stop. I hope you keep playing on.

I really want to but I always find... Those new patch they're going to add more chunks. Yeah. Yeah. That's actually a little thing here but I guess now we can throw this as the... Oh it's just sweating here. This is the second podcast in the list of like longest weeks ever. Yeah.

Two hours. We've had one where we broke two hours. It's not going to be bad next week because we're all going to roughly do the same thing. We're all going to the same place this weekend. Yeah but... It's like I happened to do a thing that obviously was going to spark lots of discussion. You went to... I enjoyed the talks but I mean sorry if that...

Some people love it. Some people hate it. Yeah. Some people... It's different when they go to Mac. In news I stop. And some people are like... I fucking...

I love things. I love going to the news. What's new in the news? Oh shit. Warriors are getting a DPS stance? Fucking sweet. Well let's just roll right in as you're saying. We've got...

Yeah. I want to get something in real quick. It's just announced like less than an hour ago that Ayami Kojima will be doing special art for Bloodstained for the slip cover for the game if you're over the $100 tier. That's nice. Which is fucking awesome. Good job. She was the one that was missing that couldn't be contacted.

The one thing that has always remained consistent with Castlevania is that even when I dislike the games like say Curse of Darkness... The art. The art is Curse of Darkness is fucking awesome. Complete-ish because you said slip cover art not in-game art or anything like that yet. Yeah of course. But she never... She only ever did concepts and stuff.

Well yeah. And well now you could. Yeah of course. With character portraits and conversations and things like that. But I mean she missed a lot of Castlevanias. Yeah. Like order and portrait and stuff. That's a fucking get.

That's a fucking get. That's a good job. Good job. But yeah. She went through this shit. She lives in the middle of a mountain. So we can start off with you just talk about the Bloodborne patch that's coming. Fucking 600 vials and bullets now.

Oh yeah. That's so good. You're now going to be able to store up to 600 vials and bullets in your storage. Okay. In your storage. Yeah. So Woolly which is great because I constantly brush up against them. Yeah.

And actually out on bullets and then going to pick up bullets and like oh you have too many bullets. It's like you know you're going to just go grind them out. Right. So yeah. You're not super like familiar with like the Souls games like from release as they progress through these patches. You did Dark Souls 2 a little bit.

Yeah that's silly. And it was like a weird like console. But like with Dark Souls 1 on desks like they put out patches that change like very significant gameplay things like this that make huge differences. The most important is like the Dark Souls 1 patches that like changed how scaling worked and added upgrade materials into the game which is basically what this thing is going to do. The stuff that I look at that kind of makes me like a what is like when they go all right

now the inside shop opens up right away. Yeah. With one inside you don't need 10. Good. And it makes me think like oh so. Yeah. But I guess it kind of changes the like I just think about how much I was overthinking it when I first had that happen.

Oh yeah. Oh yeah. I'm like wait they wait for you to get to 10 so that must mean something. No. And your brain just goes so far with it when it's like no they just arbitrarily thought one should be enough. Now you're ready. It's a currency check.

You know. And I was like oh okay. I guess that wasn't as in depth as I thought it was. Oh well. The only reason I prefer to 10 is because then you can actually buy something when you're pure one. I don't like you can buy very little. You can at least see.

You can buy items but it's waste. And related to that. YOSP basically confirms a Bloodborne expansion. That was the weirdest thing in the world. Yoshida. Hey is there going to be a Bloodborne DLC? Yes. Yeah.

What? Stay tuned. Yeah. How is that? It's crazy but he's right. He's been getting asked. How do you see is it to announce DLC when your game is out? Wouldn't that be a novel concept?

Oh fuck. Yeah. Instead of announcing. Well that's the former. Well that's the former. FromSoftware has been good with that. That is. That is the FromSoftway.

Yeah. I can't fucking wait. Hey our game is just big success and people like it. Maybe we should. I haven't even beaten the game yet. Maybe that's a good idea. Let's put that in the preview. Apparently people know where the DLC area is going to be though.

There's that locked door in the basement of Burgamorth that is super suspicious. That's fine. There's a couple places. Then they don't know. They're thinking. There's always a locked door somewhere that might be something. People thought they knew where the Dark Souls 1 DLC was going to be and then it was like they dragged you through a portal.

So it's just hey shut up. I think Dark Two was the only one where it was really obvious. It was super obvious. And for demons it would have been obvious if they had done it. It would have been so obvious. But at the same time with Dark Two it was like oh this giant fucking doors. Like a teleporter that was not there. You can't predict that they're not just going to chunk in a giant thing.

It could be anything. Oh it could be anything. Oh look here's a gate to another part of the graveyard. Dude you could have this. There's an offshoot in the forest. They could make you jump off the hunter's tree. Exactly. That could be the good way.

So that's what I'm saying. Like pegging down the hole. It might be this door. It's like stop it. It's fine. It's fine. It's fine. When the game has so many locked doors.

Dude wise heavens were going to come out at the same time as fucking DMC4 Special Edition. This is the worst. Yo and you're going to have to play Splatoon too. No I'm not. You're going to still be. Yeah I know. What a tough fucking decision. Final Fantasy or fucking Verge.

I don't know what to do with my mind. I can't decide where. I know there's a sarcastic bend on that. But when you say Final Fantasy and we're talking about good Final Fantasy. Yes. That actually is a tough decision. I mean you have one DMC that's not good. And one DMC that's alright.

But then you have Final Fantasy. That DMC is amazing. And I'm going to play it. I just don't think I'm going to put the time into it that I would otherwise. Yeah like 10 playthroughs. Like no. I'm one of those FF outliers. You're not even on the grid motherfucker.

You're not. We're not even into MMOs. Did you get your filthy pre-order on for DMC to get that DLC shit? Yeah. You get a bunch of costumes. Filthy pre-order. Oh no I didn't. Fuck everything.

You get a classic Lady and Gloria. I don't care because I'm not allowed to get the pizza box. And you get a Virgil theme for the PS4. If you like Virgil you might like the Virgil theme for the PS4. Willie I'll go in with you to get the pizza box. You know what the pizza box is where it's at. Really. That I actually.

Well no. I did pre-order. Whoops. I forgot. The Japanese one. The Japanese one. Yeah but I mean the English one. The German pizza box.

Okay but then you have a Japanese disc with Jeff. I bought European Bayonetta for the total. You know just. Okay. I just wanted to know this. See Willie loves these games. Would you say that 14 has the best Final Fantasy soundtrack? I'd say it's up there.

It's at least as strong as I've been listening to that soundtrack. In all fairness a lot of it's remix tracks. So like. But that's what I want. But that's like saying Smash has the best Nintendo soundtrack. I think it does. Right. Right.

Yeah. Come on. That's not fair. You can create your own. You're right. You're right. It's not fair. It's not fair but you're right.

Yeah. Yeah. Okay. That's all I want to know. Exactly. Because like the soundtrack is fucking unbelievable. Like hey Michael Jackson's greatest hits album is probably his best album. Yeah.

Yeah. Well it's his greatest hit. Yeah. Yes it is. Yeah. Yes it is. Then yes I guess it does have the best soundtrack. Did you see Max Landis.

A tweet that's like. Limp Bizkit had some good songs. You fucking historic assholes. Like no it wasn't. You like. I forget the term for it. But when you revisionist. You revisionist assholes.

And everyone's going name one. He goes I can name seven. God. It's funny. Well. What else. No I was going to say like I want to see. I want to see a fucking like a best of album for like bands that do concept albums that

were tracks link into each other. Yeah. Fucking Pink Floyd best of. Oh and just fucking. Where you just jump into the middle of a song. Oh man. Horrible stupid shit. Yeah.

Fucking anyway. Death pumps. You have fucking. You have fucking 2112. And you cut out like the last track of 2112. And you put that on. Just. On Rush's album.

Into the middle of a. Yeah. Yeah. I forgot. Anyway. Whatever. It doesn't matter. Dude you want.

You want a picture perfect example. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You want a picture perfect example of how Square Enix is insane. You know how you get this soundtrack. It's a Blu-ray.

And that's the only way you can get it. Yeah. By a Blu-ray disc. So you can put it in your. Yeah. In your video player. And watch it. I was going to say.

I was like. That happens in Japan. It's weird. It's so. Don't even get me started on the first song. Listening to like a best. I was going to say listening to like a best of Mars Volta playlist is the equivalent of just switching your channel on your TV.

Yeah. Just like listening to that. Like the narrative. That's what you're getting out of it. Put your hands up if you watch the footage of the canceled Doom 4 game. I did. I have. Not much there.

Me and Pat especially. Hey. Are you give Zenimax or Bethesda some shit. It has changed. The rules have changed. It is now no longer are we not good enough to see the new Doom trailer. It is now are we good enough to see more than five seconds of the new Doom trailer. And the answer is no.

No. You need to soak. You have to soak in what could have been. Matt was personally invited to see the new Doom trailer. Yes he was. So and you're the best. What? What?

They wouldn't pay for my airfare. Oh come on. Fuck you. No. Right now. Right now. Right now. I want you.

You need to soak in the El Generico Doom that could have been. So that you fully appreciate what's going to come. Me and Pat against Zenimax some shit. But bravo and give a kiss on the cheek to whoever at Zenimax said cancel this shit. After they ship fucking enemy territory. Good thing they fucking can this one. I have not seen it. You haven't.

No. Oh you are rolling your grave right now. I'm going to get in it. Get in it. Just to roll. It's some fucking here. It's some fucking like resistance level. It's way less cooler than resistance.

It's so boring. Why do you have a fucking tab open to legal legends? Because I was trying to remember something for a question that got asked. Okay. Well he feels out of touch that you're into FF. Whatever. Look it up later. It doesn't matter.

There's a fucking countdown on this podcast till somebody goes. So I started to play League of League. No. No. My grandma got me into League the other day. No. She's a fucking feeder. Well we just hit the brakes and fucking hard write it on that.

Someone asked a question that's like what do you think of characters that are wasted on things that you don't care about or whatever. And I'm like that fucking cool samurai Yasuo from League of Legends is way cooler than anything I'd care to partake of. I don't believe in the idea of a character being wasted on something. Whoever's making that game make that character. No. No.

I know. I just my dumb personal. Why can't that character be in a game? I don't want to play. That's right. It's selfish and stupid. It's a little twinge. But that Doom thing is basically a bunch of resistance fighters all wearing brown going

we beat the demons and then there's just landscapes of towers. Resistance fall of man kind of shit. It's a way more bland. So as much as I shit all over the marketing department we're involved with all this Doom stuff I feel really bad for the people making this Doom game because is there anything. The new one or the new one. The new one. Okay.

Anything that like is more high pressure in terms of like a remake of an old fucking thing. It's up there. It's up there. Like Doom is. Wolfenstein. No. Doom. No.

Doom is a bit more than one. No it is. But you know they're. Yeah. Doom is like arguably like the most important game to ever exist. And also I said arguably the fact that your mouth is going to open my mouth. Yeah. I didn't know.

I was just chewing. The fact that you were like going to say something but you're like then you were going to say something. That's exactly what I mean. Yeah. It can be argued. Of course. And also argued that it's one of the best games ever.

And it invented like. Or it popularized. It solidifies. It's on the list. So just say it's on the list. No it's awesome. I love Doom. So this is scary if you got to make the new one.

But you know I don't feel bad. Did you see the five seconds of the new trailer. I did see that. Cause the Revenant looks awesome. Revenant looks pretty good. I don't feel bad for them yet because for all we know they could be the next machine games. Yeah but it's it though. It's still it.

Yeah but it isn't it. It made Wolfenstein. It isn't it. So you know. Now yeah. I have a lot of faith in this after the Wolfenstein games because they were awesome. So in the trailer that was described to me that I'm not good enough to. I'll never be good enough to watch because the trailer we're getting at this E3.

It's going to be a brand new trailer which is still good. Thank you. I hope it's like a 10 minute demo. Oh if it's a 10 minute demo I forgive everything. I'm sure they're going to show a ton I think. They're going to do that and then that'll be an opening act to fall out for and everyone's going to shit their pants. What is described as literally the game has.

Literally the game has fatalities. That's what gets me. If they were smart they looked. If they if they're smart. Brutal doom. They looked at Brutal doom and said wow that's awesome. Let's do that. Yeah.

I just think of the days when we were you know. Rather the episodes of the podcast where we yearned for the good old GamePro days. When is this coming out. It's out now. Yeah. I just heard about it now. Go get it now. Yeah.

I still. I'm fine with that. I still. So I don't mind. I'm still in that way. I don't mind getting cold cocks. Yeah I know. It'll come eventually.

And I'll get hype eventually. But woolly we already know it's coming out. That's the problem. Yeah. If they just. Then you're going to get hype then. If they just. Remember.

No it has to be now. Remember I bought out the worst. If it's not now you'd rather have nothing. I would rather have no information on this. You're not even in the worst situation because the worst situation of woolly and probably Matt can attest to this is when you work for the company. And you want to know more. And you're not allowed to know more.

That's another level of shit. And you're thinking about risking your job to find out more. To peek underneath the door. I swiped two key cards to get in to my work and you fucking won't tell me. Yeah exactly. Recent time where a game has done this it's been to its fucking downfall. Where hey D4 is out. Oh it's out now.

No one bought it because no one knew. And its sales were crappy at launch. And now it's been fine but still. Well back then games only had to sell 10s or maybe a couple hundred. And now it's just not realistic to do that at all. But that being said that Doom remake again is like wow what a fucking bullet. Yeah well yeah there's a hey they want to make they made BJ Blazkowicz a character. And that's hard.

But at least BJ had a name. Yeah. Fucking Doom guy. I'm not the only one here who thinks it's a bit like I don't know. He had a name in Doom 3 did he know. Where like um. He had a name in Doom 3. That's also a different remake of Doom 1.

So it's not Doom 1 and Doom 2. Where like Wolfenstein was being sold alongside a still upcoming Doom beta. Like pleased by Wolfenstein because you'll get this still a coming Doom beta. But the irony is now that we have Faith. The comic is canon. Why? Because I have huge guts. Tear and rip.

Rip and tear. Sorry. The irony is now that we have Faith and Doom because Wolfenstein was a big success. As opposed to when previously they sold us empty promises of Doom to make us believe in Wolfenstein. That's correct. I think that's right. You're totally right. Hey they made a new game so.

Yeah exactly. They made two. So yeah no. You know who else made a good game? Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no.

And he's teasing that the next Street Fighter 5 character is going to be one we haven't seen in a while. Oh. We've sold this dance a million times. It starts again. Eagle. Sure. But regardless of the speculation more importantly there's going to be a playable build.

Okay if it has to be. Which is amazing. If it has to be. It's not a total one news. The only thing you can take away from this is if it hasn't been a character we have spent. It has to be. It has to be.

That's not a Street Fighter 4. That's the only thing you can take away from it. So on the short list of like the cutting rooms. Alpha and 30 is Q, Eurion, Alex. All the people we wanted. Alex is on the left slightly just Tatsunoko. Yeah. Yeah that's true.

That's true actually. You know I think Eurion is a really good chance. Yeah. Maybe Karen. Maybe Karen. Q is obviously more. Yeah but like Eurion is a more like. God Karen would fucking.

Played in like character. But yeah you're right. Yeah but you can do Q. You can do anything. Anything. But Q. Has no age. Q's design is just like so amazing.

Yeah. It's like. With the Bison trailer. I don't think they're going to do Q. I think they're going to do a girl. This time. Because they've done. We're three boys and a girl.

I would write love. I would love to see. Not necessarily for this one. What's a girl that's not Karen. Who says Q's got a girl. Oh that would be a reveal. If you if it was Q. And she took off the mask.

And she was even cooler. Like. What's a girl character. That's not Karen. That hasn't been. That wasn't the street first. Armica. Armica.

Yeah. Armica is the one. Mackey. Mackey. That's about it. Not many. Just. What I want is the Q.

Character trailer to come out. And like. You know Q. Looks more or less the same. And all that. And then just see the internet. Go who the fuck is this new character. Yeah.

Exactly. Just like oh I can't believe they went so weird with a new character. Every trailer. Street Fighter V. Makes me a little bit more warmed up to it. Because the initial trailer I was not really super happy with. I was just like oh good. It's it's created.

But I was just like and it looks. The FGC trailer. Yeah. I was. Like the one that leaked. The night before. Yeah. Right.

It wasn't much. Each additional trailer. I'm like okay. It's looking better and better. I'm sad that there's only one stage. But. At least. Yeah.

Yeah. I wish they would show off another stage. Yeah. It's the same thing. It's the same thing. Yeah. It's like we've done the dance. It's the same song and dance.

We've done the dance. But if there was an Alex trailer. I would be 100% of Arkansas. I'm just saying fast forward two years from now. It's going to be great. Yeah. Like known in a year. It's the same thing as what you said really.

I want the new thing. Two years. It's coming out next year. It's coming out right next week. It's coming out next year. Coming out at the beginning of 2016. Yeah. Yeah.

That's not two years. We're playing it. And we're used to it. Oh yeah. And we know it. And it's happening. Absolutely. It's going to be fun.

Yeah. It's going to be fun. Like I saw that. Like I said. Just. Okay. Got up. Bought my PS4.

Yeah. That's all. All I needed to know was this game is happening. The trailer just had to let me know. Did you get your PC after that? Or before? After that. After.

I don't remember. But it was around the same time. It had to have been after. Yeah. Because it's like you could have just gotten the PC instead. But that wouldn't have counted for the other fighters. That would have solved my problem. No, it doesn't.

I think it was after though. It was way after. I would never look at the PC version of Street Fighter and say like yeah that's my console. It's not adequately. That's not what you play. Plus. We spoke about this with Mortal Kombat X. Exactly.

Tournament-wise it's got to be standard. Oh I don't want to. It's got to be standard. Don't want this kind of version. And speaking of tournament-wise standardness and fun stuff. Good news for everybody. That's really cool play. That awesome.

Well we'll play now. Looks like that awesome thing that Skullgirls got going where the PS4 version supports your PS3 stick. Yeah. Driver that they made. So we're also going to have that happening with Street Fighter. Awesome that they actually credited Labs throw. Exactly.

Straight up. Street Fighter 4 totally has this. If you've got a stick you're going to be fine. Now what we need is obviously to see everyone else get on board. Because it doesn't solve your problem if you still have to buy a stick for the few games that don't really have. No. What we need is not for everyone else to get on board.

What we need is for Sony. Sony. It's for Sony to put it as a driver into the firmware. No. You're right. For it to be like system level. And that's a discussion with Madcats of course as well because they've started production on their shit.

Yeah. Madcats went on. That being said that new arcade stick to T2 is amazing. To be fair everyone kind of thought they'd be upset about like things like that where it turned out either like no like Mark Mann came out and said that's an awesome thing that he was really they're really they're happy that. Madcats solution. Skullgirls put that out there.

It's super cool. The Madcats solution is that they hope that the tournament edition two sticks are good enough that you'll want to upgrade. You want to upgrade anyway. And guess what? They're really good sticks. Absolutely. They're so heavy.

They're so heavy. I love it. They're easy to work with and mod and yeah good stuff so you know fucking good good on you guys man. Like Skullgirls doing it and they've been innovating other shit for a while now and you know the pause button hold feature and all that shit but it takes big games like MKX and Street Fighter and actually make it to the limelight. That's it.

That's exactly it. Yeah. Street Fighter 5 doesn't support this. That's bad. That'd be bad for him. No. Why would it not? It'd be super.

Well the only reason I would think is because this version of Street Fighter 4 is made by Westerners. Maybe. So. So this week I want to give the slow clap to a game that I don't particularly care for but this genius actual like policy makes me so happy. Which is? The H1Z1Death is unbanning cheaters as long as they apologize publicly on YouTube.

That's awesome. Not to the devs but to the players and you link it to the devs and they will tweet it and tweet your apology and then you get unbanned. That's interesting. Fighting game should do that. And yeah and like they were and it's a limited exactly right. It's a limited time thing and they've already like they've unbanned like three people like it's so limited but it's like they had to re-ban a guy because he made it private again

and it's like no no this is your public fucking stock. You can't take it back. You're in the stocks. This is your public flocking. You're in the pillory. You know. And you apologize for ruining the game for everybody and then you can play again. I like this.

It's great. And you're totally right that it's a game that you could not know less about or care. No. But they have but they also but they came out and they came out saying like yeah this is about this is a campaign that we're doing that's it's not so much about unbending people as it is about making an awareness out putting awareness out there that like fucking cheating is ruining games or the multiplayer is the whole experience you know and this is a game where there's no game if people are cheating with you.

Yeah. There's nothing to play. It sucks when you play an online game and people are shooting rockets from their handgun and I watched one or two of them. Exactly. With no reload. I watched one or two of them and the one thing that they all had in common is that they all said hey man I put in like 200 hours legit you know I just I was playing like on my

character but I was just running into so many cheaters that I just got fed up and I just thought you know okay I'll just put I'll put on not these super weapons but I'll put on the thing that lets me see where you are you know and everyone is like they're all people that are like I played legit and I ran into so many cheaters that I said fuck it I'm doing it too and that's what happened. Right. It's a fucking area of influence of cheating. Epidemic.

There's two kinds of cheating. There's your fucking horrible like actual cheaters and then there's your pat-cheating. No. Then there's what I'm terming as a social cheater. There's where I've been seeing those people lately in 14 people that do the 24 man raid and just sit outside the boss room and hope you win because they don't want to actually fight the boss. Oh just pull that.

They just want to get the drops. Oh just being a shit. Yeah it's not even cheating. You're just being a shit. Not helping on the fucking 24 man raid. It's cheating. Is there a game system that lets you punish that person? You can contact GMs.

There should be a tighter thing there. If you get a bad enough tank you can get them banned for being a shit tank. There's a metaphor here about how like people are getting infected by mods and hacks in the game about zombies but I'm too lazy to make it. Yeah just leave it on the floor and someone will make it for you. Exactly. Yeah they did that. Cure it.

Yeah good on them. If you're a zombie and you eat people, apologize publicly on YouTube and we'll forgive you. No you're eating someone again. It doesn't count. Stop that. They need to eat the brains. No they need hugs. I just saw other people doing it to me.

They need love and hugs and that's what cures them. Liam tell the world about Net High. Net High. It looks interesting. I haven't looked too deeply into it because I don't want to be disappointed. What's it on? It's on the Vita. So tell me, tell me like this is not, I don't see why that's a punchline unless you're just

picking on me here. There's this not look inspired by the manga series that are out there that are all like the Twitter based mangas. A little bit exactly. So in this I think you read the same synopsis I did. You're hunting other people who are on social networks, people with no lives and you're dueling them with info that you can find about some. These premises.

Yeah but these premises are going so far with them all like it's mandatory that everyone has a cell phone in the future and everyone has to have Twitter or the Twitter type program and then the game begins. No definitely. Cause it's like alright we get it, would it be helpful, would it be if you died when you had zero followers? So did you see the main character and did you know that he looked a bit like a grann protagonist?

That's a very fucking camoness. So if you look up the artist on his pics, he has tons of grann lagon and kill a kill fanart. Big egg, the shades are just clearly yeah. But whatever the designs look cool and the game looks like it's closer to the sides. This is the one where you're catching people who lie about themselves on Twitter. Yeah you see the cool guy and he turns into the fat guy and the trailer. The one thing I thought was cool is if you look at the trailer either they're doing some

visual tricks or they have like 3D going on like they did with Guilty Gear XR. That looks like Guilty Gear level 3D. It looks like just as good if that's what they're doing. It's really impressive. The ink lines on some of that guy's hair swooshes actually rotate it. It's really cool looking after. That guy's not really a Navy Seal. He's just a 3D model of a Navy Seal character.

It's really just a seal with a plastic gun in it's hand. I don't know, I'm worried because like EX Troopers and Bakumatsu Rock before the game has tons of different like... That's a really good name. I know it's fucking great. That's awesome. The game has tons of art that is text. God damn it!

It's a game. Stop doing that. Hard coded. That's why I didn't look too deeply into it because I don't want to get myself typed up for it. It's hard coded. Whoever made that decision about EX Troopers is a fucking idiot. I know.

I'm just saying though. I know. I hate you. But they're like comic book effects. What are you going to do? It's a shame because having... Do not do that! It's a shame because having played EX Troopers they had so much impact when you shoot the

gun and it's like... Yeah! You just sign it in a way that you can put an alphabet in there. Like something. Anything. It costs money. Can you imagine? Subtitle the top of the screen.

With the warranty. All right. All right. All right. So Matt and Liam. I think the actual thing was we're not going to sell enough units to warrant this. And I think they were 100% correct. All right.

All right guys. QA time. You're playing a game. A gun's being fired and you're seeing giant placeholder underscore string sliding out of the gun. How fucking insane would that be? Any time you shot. That's the only way to do it.

And every gun you get would make it different. Or like a Batman old school WAPO punch. Oh that's a whole test plan. You get all the esoteric language. That's an entire test plan. That's an entire... That's two guys just for that. Yeah.

Oh shit. Like Ka'Blam in Finnish is a super bad insult. Yeah exactly. We got it. We got it. Finnish people might get upset. So? Can't sell it in Finland.

Yeah. They're already not going to sell it in Finland. Your profit margins are even smaller now. Yeah. Finland's like 2%. Looks really cool though. I do hope it... Like it's by Marvelous and they own X seed so I hope it comes up here.

Remember when Microsoft said that like all those Slavic countries or Swedish or whatever that area... They're tier three countries or whatever the fuck. Yeah. Because they all buy playstations. Yeah. And play Eve online. Fucking just seeking tier three countries in treatment.

Like seeing the thing where it's like oh so don't forget Guilty Gear Excerd lands in Europe next month. I fucking... I got so mad. Lude. It got me too. Europe. I saw that on Give Me a Two the other day.

Guys my heart fucking goes out to you. When did Guilty Gear come out? In January? Like five years ago. Because people... Everyone here is casually done. Casually people are done with Guilty Gear Excerd. Yeah.

And you just haven't even gotten like oh my... The goofy... Five. I haven't even figured it out yet. What are you doing guys? Well if you have a low army accent and you like persona then that shit's been rough for a long ass time. How is that the shit that's...

Fuck man. Because they don't... They were a small company and they decided where should we put our one external publishing house. Should it be in North America or Europe and the obvious choice in North America? Of course. Big enough to make a European one so they always relied on like ghost light and shit like that.

But this is where another company steps in, takes it up and gets it out there. And everyone they ever dealt with, all the third party European distributors are apparently pieces of shit. They need to fucking partner with Sony for Persona 5. Two things to fail and two not small enough to die. Yeah. I hope they partner with Sony for Persona 5. This is where Capcom says yeah we'll get that out of the games.

Does Sega not have a European publishing branch? Yeah they do. Can they not just put P5 out simultaneous? Maybe. I mean they could if they meet all the regulations but that's a lot of languages. Stop having more languages than they ask you. It's actually actively a lot more work to do a European release than an English. Yeah but at least you can do the UK release that same time, right?

No I don't think you can. Unless... Because you have to be okay for all the other... Are you serious? They're all the same builds. And don't forget you need Peggy ratings. You need USK ratings. You need that German censorship.

Dude you need to boot the game up and see a bunch of flags. Yeah yeah that's what you want. That's what it is. It's a lot of work to do a European release. A couple of games that... Sorry Europe. A couple of PAL games I bought off eBay. Move out of Europe.

I can only get in Spanish. It's like a spaceship. It's free. And then the game runs at 50 FPS. It's 50 hertz? It's not the same thing. I know it's not the same thing but everyone thinks it is. It's the same thing.

You're fucking... You get a different frill. I know I know. I know. I know but I remember there was a big kerbuffle over a European virtual console for a while because they were getting the 50 hertz versions of these games which are running at lower framerates and do change those games in a lot of key ways. And the Europeans were like why can't we finally get the fucking North American version of these games?

We don't use those TVs anymore. No one uses fucking PAL television 50 hertz shit anymore. And they're yelling to an ocean. That doesn't give a fuck. And the voice has to carry across a fucking mile before it hits anybody that can make a decision. She got as busy playing Japanese 3DS games on a Japanese 3DS. Bobby, Banga's and Mash. So clickbait in action.

This one is short and sweet but it's really simple. I think I know the one. We had a photo of it when you came in the room. I do know this one. So Patrick Clipwick, the former giant bomb guy, writing an article for Cooctacool. He didn't write it. He didn't write it? No, it was written by a...

The byline says Patrick Clipwick. No, we're not talking about the article. We're talking about the worth reading post. This is something. Yeah, the worth reading post is just an amalgam. You know he didn't write the article though. No, but we're talking about... Yeah, no, okay.

Let's really talk. Sorry, okay. I am not talking about the... The contents. I'm talking about the worth reading. Patrick, I'm like some kickstarters are lying about game budgets. Giant picture of ukulele. Of ukulele.

Yeah. And then... And that was a pull from the article you're describing. Yes, but... Shortly after edited to worth reading, the way games are using kickstarter is changing with big ukulele picture because the ukulele guys... What are you doing? What the actual...

Why would you do that? That was the wrong one. It should have been a picture of bloodstained because then there would have been no argument. Because at a glance, like, you look at that and it's just like, oh, it says ukulele is lying about their budget. Yeah, no. That's the National Enquirer. Yeah.

You know what I mean? That pig had four kinds of luck. My biggest problem with that is if he had just known his shit, he would have put a picture of bloodstained and no one would have been able to argue about it. When you work for a Kentucky, you literally get dumber. Maybe. It's just like, ah, come on, man. Don't clickbait that hard, dude.

Clickbait a lot less. And by the way, that polygon article... Are you guys excited for these projects? Here's 10 reasons why you shouldn't. By the way, that polygon article, which is written by a guest person who's running her own Kickstarter right now, is terrible for a number of reasons that I don't need to explain anymore, because I said that sentence. Yeah.

All right. All right. And thus we move on. The gist of it is like Kickstarter... The conflict of interests there is such that how did they allow this? Liam, you said it. I'll sum it up in two sentences. These Kickstarter's are ruining Kickstarter by someone whose Kickstarter is failing.

Check out my Kickstarter, by the way. Yes. It's a really original game that I'm making. Well, that's enough. Based on Hamlet. Like, imagine us putting out a video tomorrow saying Let's Plays or Killing Let's Plays. Yeah. Like, it makes just as much sense.

We can't compete with James. We can't compete with Starkade. We can't compete with Aaron or Starkade. We can't do it. Jon Tron. Jon Tron's thing is better. Okay. Okay.

Okay. The new... Yeah, right, right, right. Yeah. Exactly. Jon Tron, why are you ruining our business? What? We can't compete with that.

There's no money to be made. Yeah. We get all the leper views. No, not the lepers. Oh. We don't want to say that. We have the idea of a leper at his laptop watching Let's Plays. Well, when we get the YouTube contract, it's like you get X amount for regular views and

you get Y decreased amount for leper views because they have to clean it. This is just like that movie called Papillon with Charlton Heston escaping from that French prison. Exactly. We can't compete with Starkade. He smokes the cigar and the lepers like, how'd you know it was dry leprosy and he's like, I didn't. And then the lepers are like, you're cool, man. That's like, I need to watch this.

They help him escape from the island. That's views. I need to watch this Let's Plays, but I'm going to need to go on blood. So hook up my blood bag. I'm just watching the fucking laptop while I watch Let's Plays. What is brain trying to get to a point that I didn't even make? It's Peter Parker writing about how awesome Spider-Man is. Yeah.

Dude, Spider-Man's so hot. Yeah, basically. Uh, girls should fuck him. Especially black cat. Please. So, uh... I want to have sex, Spider-Man, with you. Oh, no.

Fappo. In a move that just... Exactly. In a move that like... Fappo. I feel like I've covered this story already, but we didn't. We covered very similar ones. Oculus Co-Founder, uh, Lucky Palmer Lucky, is accused of fraud by the company he used to

work at. This is so similar. Saying that he apparently used the data that he got while he was there to move forward and co-found Oculus with shit he pulled from another company. It's like... Uh-oh. It's almost like... It's almost like nowadays any innovative, like, massive new companies are going to just

be made up of people that walked out with the data from their last company. Carmack, Carmack, like, first of all, he got hit with this a while ago. But he also had some statements, like, before that, where he talked about, like, copyright and patent law in terms of the tech world. And especially in programming and how infuriating it was, because he had run into situations and she's like, how do I solve this latency problem? Or whatever, right? And he would code up a solution and be like, yeah, I figured out the best solution.

And then he'd go to show it to his boss or whatever, or whoever the fuck was in charge of this. And somebody already figured that out already and they own it. We can't use it. So you got to figure out a different way to solve this problem. Yeah. And it's like, fuck, man. No, that's...

Programming. It's insane. Like, you're building your house and you decide that, hey, you know what? A foundation might make the house be more sturdy. You can't do it that way. Foundations are copyrighted. Yeah, exactly. Jimmy, what can't I do it that way?

I made a foundation. I thought up it myself. I thought up it myself. Yeah, but Bobby already thought about that. Oh, fuck Bobby. Yeah. Yeah. Bobby owned the word edge too.

He does. God, that edge thing. What's the same thing? Language. Yeah, copyrighted. It's scary. Exactly, exactly. So I feel like this is not the last we're going to see of like this.

I feel like every other thing is in tech that's similar to... I own every thought you had while you worked here is the gist of it. Or like person that works a company that gets good at thing then leaves to make their own thing because they're not good at things. Everyone go through the papers. Did he ever touch anything like that? Yeah. That's like Miyamoto starting his own plumbing company.

Yeah. He'll get fucking through. With all the data he called. So you guys... You guys found a secret warp while he's working on the drain. The Nintendo ninjas will kill him. Gonna plumb this shit. Speaking of plumbing shit, you remember that fucking, fucking shitbag kid that was...

Such a good leader. That was swatting everybody. Yeah. So... Mr. Lizard Squad. Mr. Lizard Squad. Yeah, he got pulled in to court and he pled guilty to 23 charges of fucking with people's lives and shit while smirking apparently.

Yeah, you know why? Cause he's a 17 year old fucking piece of shit. Probably cause he's swatting the judge right then. Right then and there. Cause he's 17, he's Canadian and he made a deal so he's not gonna see jail. So they went into some of the details with like... Like he didn't just swat people. Like he straight up like, fought, like harassed and got people's...

Bomb threats and all sorts of things. Bomb threats, got people's social security numbers out there and like in some cases got credit cards out there and like ruined people's credit. Yeah. Lines and ratings and shit like that and just completely destroyed lives. And it's just like, you're a minor so they're probably just... You're a minor? He's probably not gonna do hard ass part of the time.

But we don't know yet. Like he's not. He made a deal. There's no way he would have made a deal as a minor for jail time. Yeah. There's no way. But he'll be on like 10 years of probation. Sure.

It's like, yeah. So they only, they do, they only upgrade like cases to being tried as an adult when it's like usually... And part of the reason why he got caught in the first place is cause he was stupid enough to brag about it on stream for hours. It's almost as if he's a 17 year old. But at the same time, like not even that dumb because it's something that you couldn't really even get in trouble for because like there's some of the people that went to go

to the cops about this had to explain what swatting was. Yeah. And the cops are just like... Like they just didn't even understand. People do this? What? You know? And they had to go back and forth and like, oh, well he lives in another country.

Well, we can't do anything. This is gonna get a lot worse if it gets any better. A ton of these cases just died in the water cause they're like, he's in another country. He's on the internet. What do you want us to do? When you say that, I always think of Chief Wiggum getting this... That's exactly what I'm describing. That is exactly what I'm describing.

I listened to this... I don't want to call it an interview, but it was a guy, he has a YouTube channel called ReviewTechUS today. Yeah, ReviewTech. Yeah, he had a little... Stupidity bump up, do up, whatever, explosion. Oh, that guy. See, yeah, nobody remembers the name of that.

Cause he's got a good opening hook. It's good. He had a talk with two lizard squad guys over Skype. Oh, really? And it was mediated by another third-party guy who I think is a friend of his. And yeah, they claimed that the 17-year-old guy from Canada, they knew him, but he wasn't actually part of Lizard Squad. And they were like, he was just trying to impress them or something.

And they were the biggest asshole. Like, they are such gigantic assholes. In case it's not evident by what they do already. Were they just playing it off like it's no big deal? No, not that it's no big deal. They know exactly what they're doing, but they don't care. They're getting their jollies. They don't care because they're not going to get caught.

They are the biggest assholes in the world. No, I think there are some warlords that would disagree. You know, they are the biggest assholes that I have had the displeasure of listening to in the world. Because, like, anti-swatting laws are not, like, a full... They don't exist. They do exist in, like, I think, like, California. Oh, okay.

But, like, it's just... Not to a scale. No, but not in general. Yeah, that's it. What's your...what's California trooper going to come down to fucking Toronto to... No, because he's too thirsty. We back-traced it. Yeah, it's going to get a lot worse if we're going to go...

The law can't go through because of the drought. You can't...you can't fucking... How am I supposed to drive my boat up to Canada if there's no water? Oh, the salt. You have to drive over the salt. Oh, God. 160 days. Oh, I'm pretty sulking up on this salt.

California has the do-for-your-be. It's new mayor. The podcast preview should just be... Wait, I'm pouring water out of the governor. The governor. Yeah. I'm the mayor of California because we fell... I fell into the ocean just like that the rock movie said.

Yep. Or rescue from LA. Or any number of movies. Any number of movies. Or wire. And as far as lawsuits go, another one. I didn't realize that I just didn't follow this whole thing, but remember when we were talking about how Daniel Ratcliffe

is going to be in that rock star? Yeah. But it's like as the movie about rock star, not really about GTA. So this is a BBC drama movie that's being filmed or is being made or whatever. And it's not actually officially sanctioned by rock star. Boy, is it not.

So they've been trying to get them to not use GTA's name or like don't call my name in your lips. Well, actually what they want is for this to never happen. Yeah. And they couldn't come to an agreement. So now they're going to court over it and rock star is filing a lawsuit against the BBC. That doesn't suck because I'd love to see that documentary.

Over the documentary. That's not a documentary. It's a drama. So this is the problem. It's dramatization. Dramatization. Of the making of GTA? No.

Of the story of rock star. Oh, that's very important. Why would Daniel Radcliffe be in a documentary about GTA? Exactly. Remember who's going to play Jack Thompson? Bill Paxton. And you know what this thing is called? It's called Game Changer.

No, but when you read that it's a dramatization, the lawsuit obviously makes sense because the Housers are hyper private. They don't even really do interviews. Yeah. And you look at a dramatization, they must be terrified like, what if they make me look like a bad guy?

I'm not a bad guy. I'm going to put hair on that. Because dramatizations don't have to follow rules or what happened. But I want rock star to lose and I want them to lose for one reason or another. What's that? Because I want an entire movie to look like

those in-between scenes and unsolved mysteries. Yes. With the shaky cab and the after effects. And the zoom in on a person's eyes for five minutes. And the big red dramatization text at the bottom of the screen. I want a movie. You don't have the story down,

but it's very, very similar to this. There's a lawsuit for Toho is suing a company that's trying to sell a movie. Oh yeah, that came up last week. It has N Hathaway. And it's literally billed and the poster for it has a picture of Godzilla. And Toho is like, you're using Godzilla.

And Massacre. And Massacre as well. You're using Godzilla to promote your movie. And they're like, no, there's a picture of Godzilla. And then they're like, shut up though. The movie's not filmed yet. Furthermore, you're a company that's known for being a shit to everyone else for copyright things.

Oh yeah, great. And they hunt down. They're one of those copyright holding shit-bag companies that hunts down people and makes a ton of their money off of just lawsuits, litigation, and fucking patent. So Toho is like, and you are known for being one of the biggest problem companies with this.

Yeah, I'm Toho. But the actual statement is like, you guys are hypocrites. No, what you do- It's nuts. What you should have done, Toho, is waited for the movie to be like eight months into production. Yeah.

And all this. I bet this company is making this movie. Get the counter. Their reply is, eeee. Let's be clear. We're going to make fans of copyright law. 99% of the time copyright and patent law is abused like crazy. But this has Godzilla and Massacre in it.

And the byline is like, this movie is a mix of Godzilla and blah, blah, blah. It's like they just stole it. They just stole it. And the search fucking control is blend. It's fucking funny. It's crazy. It's good times.

Get them, Toho. And then there's like some new game, new game announcement type things and whatnot. So there's, well, there's 20 minutes of, it's still being called Game 4, but Behemoth's new game. Yeah. You can go check it out.

And they put a name out for this game. They don't have a name yet. Like I've played it. Yeah, you do. I bet you it's going to be called Game 4. If you want to see just uncut like Stamper running wilds, like Hulkamania running wilds on you. That's scary.

That's what you're getting at. Is it up on their Live League channel? You go check out their YouTube video, the first 20 minutes, and it's just Stamper doing like everything. His voice, he narrates, he makes noises as characters in the background. He's this hateful narrator.

He's fucking all over it. And it looks fucking good. If you play Battle Block Theater, and if you took Stamper off, you'd see cutscenes of nothing. Oh, yeah. It's like he's 90% the cutscene. So far.

That's a Behemoth join, all right. So far, like when you hear, it's all about, it's the narration. It's almost like The Bastion kind of thing. Yeah. Or like Ted Transistor, except it's just hateful God Stamper shitting on you as you play.

It's fucking great. It's probably not even script. There's no script. Oh, there is. Cause like you do things, and he's like responding to what you're doing. No, he just knew. No.

Yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah. The microphone going. Yeah. Exactly. So there's that. Stamper, why are you so crazy? Stamper just gets in the booth,

and there's 40 bottles of alcohol. They lock him in there, until there's like 100 minutes of dialogue. But are these for the pissing? Yes, Stamper, they're for you to piss in. And then they come in, and all the 40 bottles are still intact. Cause he doesn't need it.

Yeah, he doesn't drink. And you pissed on the floor? I know he does. Why do you... A little bit. The bottles were... No, you opened the door, and the piss comes washing out,

cause there was like a foot of it. Stamper, why? If you're like me, and you got caught, just caught up in the tide of things, and didn't have time to touch Lord of the Fallen, there's a Game of the Year edition coming out. I play a little bit.

Oh, does this come with the labyrinth? All the extra shit included. Oh, this is the one I might touch then. If I own the game already, do I get all the extra shit? I don't know. Well, this is another edition. It is?

But no, but did that come out? It's DLC. Free or DLC? It was DLC. Okay, so that answers my question then, which was like, did anyone go back? It was really... I played it.

I played it. It was really... Did anyone go back? Go back? No. Cause like Dark... Like Scholar of First Sin, and fucking Bloodborne,

like the timing didn't work. There's nothing wrong with it. It just kind of fell by the wayside. For what I played, aside from its roughness, it felt pretty... It felt like a pretty solid Dark Souls call. Yeah.

I'd be interested in playing this when this version comes out. When's that? 2-4? That's very interesting ideas about how XP worked, and we're gaining it. You would bank your XP,

but the more interesting thing is that your Bloodstained would lose XP over time. June 26th. I fought that first boss, I guess. Oh, wow. That's the same day as Double My Cry, isn't it? No, no, no.

The Double My Cry is earlier. Is it earlier than June 26th? Yeah, I think so. It's like 23rd. Fucking... Three days. The creator of Flashback, the original,

announces his new project in the trailer, Subject 13. Is it similar to Flashback? It's similar to Flashback, mixed with Room Escape, mixed with... Godzilla.

I don't even know what to call it, but maybe like a little bit of Mists in there. It's like puzzle solving, Room Escaping, Flashback Guy. That's really cool. Yeah. Interesting.

Nothing else to say. From the guy who did Flashback... Watch the trailer, go. And you can see his style. Okay, good. I'm interested. That game is so untouched. There's not much like it,

even to this day and age. Well, it's so weird, because it feels like the sequel to Out of This World that I wanted. Yeah, it does. There's so much depth to that game. It's crazy.

Yeah, and we don't talk about the... We don't talk about it. We don't talk about it. Out of This World gets all the play. And... Wow, okay, yeah. I've been sandbagging these stories, and they're not interesting,

so we're just going to skip them. Woohoo! But there's two other games. Well, one other game that was announced a while ago, something called For the Love of God. It's like Papers, Please, but you're in heaven.

Okay. And you're like letting people into the gates of heaven. Okay, so go. Take your premise. It looks kind of fun. Well, they recently saw an incredibly in-depth explanation

by you of what Papers, Please is. Yeah, I saw that too. Where is that from? No, it's from the podcast, and someone just re-optimized explanation, I believe. When you first started playing Papers, Please,

you talked about it on the podcast, and someone just recently took your entire quote. I thought it was from his Top 10, where you started off saying you didn't like it. Oh, man, I got... Was this like a Tumblr post or something?

Yeah, yeah. Oh, then I haven't seen it. I don't know. Because, yeah, I've never seen this shit. Like, you're asking me where it's from, and I'm like, I have to read it.

But it was very in-depth, so it's either from the podcast or from the top. Probably not. There's... Universal East is the shit, so in heaven, that sounds cool. Exactly, the same thing.

Is it by Lucas Pope? No, no, no, it's not. I think his new game is very, very different. It is. Oh, you're a dog. And so it's just like, I don't know, I'm not sold on it,

because it's just like, okay, so it's papers, please, but wait, it's in a different place. Yeah, I kind of get that feeling. Might be cool. Might be cool. Consider it, like,

if the writing's good enough. If the writing's good enough. If the writing's good enough. If the writing's good enough. You know, that's all it comes down to. Because you know what the game play is. Hey, it's like Superman, but this time he fights a big snake.

And another thing, too, is like, the meta-narrative of, like, being a drone fucking worker, border worker, is gonna be gone, but maybe it'll be funny. Yeah, no, exactly.

It's all the writing, you're totally right. It should be, it should be, like, rife with sardonic existential angst, and how no one actually gets in. And you should be able to play as Macho Man. There you go.

You can't get in, brother. You can't touch Mr. Elizabeth. I'll say Pierce Corp saying, character select is just Macho Man and St. Peter. Macho Man and, yeah. Yeah, you would de facto play as St. Peter on this game. That's right.

Yeah, that's like that. And there's, this is not even games, but it's fucking cool. You've seen the video, maybe, hopefully, megabots. Real robot. I read the title, but I figured that was real.

Real robots made with paint fucking guns installed, and you pilot them, and they're making a robot mech fighting league. That's cool. And, like, people have tried these things before, and Japanese companies have tried a couple things, but this one's got, like, Autodesk money behind it.

Oh, cool. Wow. In the real life. In the real life. Do they fight it? They just shoot paintballs. That's exciting. Well, they showed off the demo of the one mech

on its own so far, and, like, the plan is to have them fight. To let them fight. They just shoot paintballs. And then, once they have their own, like, league going and whatnot, they're gonna sell the joints and hard parts of robotics

to people so that you can just put together your own thing, your frame. How large are they? They go around your body. They're battle tech sized. So, like, a couple of cars high, a couple of, like, two, three cars wide.

These things are still on wheels. And they're on wheels rolling. But it's like, you get people, the limbs, you get all the hard work. They can do the rest. I don't know if you guys know this, but battle bots and robot wars were the goddamn shit.

What was that, Chris Sharper one? We talked about that. I forget the name of it. Oh, suck, it was terrible. I remember in robot wars, that one that was just a wedge of cheese, and it won so many times. Well, the ultimate winner.

Because it would just fuckin' flip the other guy down. The champ of, like, both series was Razor. The spinning one, right? With the blades on everywhere. The one that was one giant hook claw. Oh, the hook that went down. They made one and battle bots, and it crushed everyone,

and then they made a larger one to compete in robot wars. And it was able to defeat, like, two of the house robots in the battle royale. So, well, it was absurdly hard. I remember for the longest while, when I was watching,

maybe different seasons, but the seasons that I was watching, the one that couldn't be touched, was, it was robot wars. It was a fucking spinning, like, almost like pyramid. Just with saw blade. And it was just,

but it was like a flat pyramid, and it was just like, it just spins so fast that none of your things are gonna do anything. No, but yeah, Razor was a curved, like, claw that ended in a very sharp point.

And it was used hydraulics, too. And it was used hydraulics, and because it's pushing in it, this one tiny, tiny point, it would punch through everyone's robot. And, like, to the point where they had those things where if you got too close to the sides

of robot wars, the house robots would come out and cut shit. And it turned around and killed Matilda. And then killed the pig one. And then the flame one is shooting it with fire,

but its mechanics don't have anything planmable, so it's doing nothing. So it killed its opponent and took the house robot. And that thing was unsnoveled. They retired it after the seasons that they were in on BattleBots

and robot wars, because it couldn't be beaten. It was invincible. I'm trying to imagine, like, if you pile bug, but you don't impale anything, does it just go flying back on its own as a maneuver, you know?

No. I imagine it weighed way too much to do. My mom and I are actually super dumb because for a pile bug, it would work really well. You'd have to bolt it into whatever you want to pile. Yeah, yeah. I was thinking about this the other day.

I had a real throbbing urge to watch, yeah, throbbing urge to watch robot wars and classic American gladiators again. You're right. Not the Hulk Hogan version. They came out a few years ago. You know what, Matt? I'm going to say you don't.

I'm going to say you just have the urge to hear the sound effects for robot wars again. All the little... Maybe, maybe, maybe. I remember very little. There's, like, a collection of, like, 15 waves that they would play. Exactly.

And it was all screws being screwed in faster or slower. And the girls in American gladiators are super hot, but they're not as hot as the guys. You're right. Turbo? Yes.

You're correct. Saber? Jax? Well, when we were talking about 80s hot, do you really have a choice? Oh, no. So... I was like, what's 80s hot?

Everyone's sweating in Top Go. We're all sweating right now. If you want to write in and tell us who your favorite American gladiator was... It's Turbo. You could send that letter to superbestfriendcast.com. Turbo.

Isn't it with Turbo? Or when he was dating Selma for that time? I think so. Once again, that's superbestfriendcast at gmail.com. It's Turbo. Don't even write in about that. It's done.

Saber's high up there. He's pretty cool. All right. So... I don't even remember Turbo, but I remember Turbo being my favorite. Like, how fucking stupid is that? Wasn't there Iceman?

Was Iceman? No. It's bigger than Top Gun. No, no. It's bigger than Top Gun. There might be Ice. There was someone with an Ice. Well, you look up that.

I'll look up this. Look up WMAC Master. Shut up. Okay. Chris wants to know, what games do you wish you were not bad at? Oh. What...

I can just... I'll take that and I'll say the Souls games. Can I... Can I say... No, you're all right. You're not bad at Souls games. You're above average. Yeah.

Okay. Yeah. Uh... So pick something else, because you need to be something you're actually bad at. Bad at. Yeah.

I'm bad at FPS now, and it bums me out. Super bad. You're bad at puzzle games. No, I don't care, though. But you're bad, though. Yeah, but I don't... I don't wish I was...

I wish to be better. I wish... I wish I was better at Dr. Mario. Like puzzle games or... Puzzle games in general, but I'm good at some. Not all. Yeah.

I'm pretty fucking mediocre at Tetris Attack. Yeah. But Tetris, I fucking play. You're close. I'm like Puzzle Bobble. I fucking play.

My brain didn't just totally fail me on adventure games. I can't do... I'm so fucking bad at them. Pick a series. Pick a series. Let's make it more interesting. Pick a series.

Pick a series. All adventure games. I'm not great at a lot of things, but... What do you care about? I wish I was better at RTSs, like when I used to play Starcraft and worked with it.

All the micro. I wish I was really good at that. I want more macro less micro. Yeah. I wish I was better at that, and I guess character action, like I'm okay, but I don't venture in the high difficulties

because it gets too fast. But you know what it is, dude? It's just time. No. No, it's not. I agree with that. I put in a lot of time, and I'm still never going to get anywhere

near fucking Shmoop God Pat. Okay. Well, no. You're not sorry in Dash, but fucking to S-rank it. To S-rank it. You know? Not to fucking impress the world.

No, I agree with Matt. RTSs. RTSs. I play Warlord's Battlecry all the time, and I could just never overcome a certain part, and that was it. Just can't overcome that hump. There we go.

We got one from Jerome. He wants to know, if you guys had to make an LP... Wait, was he the guy in The Witcher? That's correct. If you had to make an LP, that would be only for us to watch. For us?

For us for? For us for. Wait, what? Like, who would be in it, if you were doing a private LP? If it was an LP that we were going to record and watch, or do on our own. And not show the rest of the world?

That's not an LP, then. Is the stipulation that the people you're making it for have to watch it? No, that you would want to watch it. Then I would want to watch my own? Something that we would all have to watch, but it would just be we're recording it, but just for us.

Like, some dumb shit that you would just never show the world. This is weird. I don't know. I don't record LPs for people. I record them because I like to do them, and they're my job. But the question is, if you didn't... Then I would do the same ones I'm doing now,

just so people would see them. The only one I can think of, because I also don't really like watching LPs, is I would watch Darkseed, if Pat and Woolly didn't. Yeah, but I wouldn't make it for you. I'm enjoying Areosaurus. That just said it.

Why would you make it for us? Woolly said that the other day, the best compliments I ever received. That was, like, really great. That's a good fucking series. I'm finally happy with it. This is the oddest question ever. Alright, well...

I would never make an LP for someone. Why am I black? Because my LPs are terrible, and no one should watch them. That's not true. Alright. They're pretty awful. They're not all going to be gold.

Even when they're filtered. Oh, Bloodborne 1 is terrible. Oh, yeah. Phil wants to know if you have ever come across or seen any of the locations for just-for-laps gags in Montreal. Yeah. Because they're doing another 15th anniversary

so keep your eyes peeled for some bullshit. Dude, right next to our college, they were shooting one when we were there. That shits around all the time. Montreal is a relatively small city. Exactly, yeah. I want to say, most Montrealers that live in the central parts

of the island have seen some gags. If I watched more just-for-laps gags, I could probably pull out a lot more. But I don't really like just-for-laps gags because it's too weird. It's cheap. It's cheap, yeah. Alright.

Some of them are really good, though. Some of them are really good, but when you watch the full episode for the one or two, it's not fun. It's the audio mixing. There was one that- There you go. There is the girl.

Ice. Yeah. I am not crazy. That's a good one. Let's say she's about to drive her kids to soccer practice. No, one of the ones that I saw recently that I was like,

okay, that's funny. That's pretty funny. It was because I hadn't seen it before. Oh, on YouTube. On real life. And I was like, whoa, really? No, yeah. It was like-

Like somewhere up by Salem and Rahm, there was like a back street and a cop pulls over a person or whatever and is talking to them and stuff, like a pedestrian, not a car, you know? Yeah. And asks them some questions about shit and then behind the cop,

like a pink elephant, like a polka dotted elephant walks by and the person starts freaking out and the cop's installing the cop to look, turn around. Like whatever the fuck. Yeah. And then like the elephant goes by

and then like later, like when the cop does turn around, it's like just got a fat lady with like a polka dotted dress walking by and like people are going like, no, but the cop's like, really? Really?

You piece of shit? Like that's what you do? Like good job. And people like actually, actually rubbing their eyes, going like, uh. That is such a cheap gag. It's so good.

Silly fucking shenanigans. Well, because it's just like put the person in a super awkward situation. I'm more interested into like, hey, you know, you can see the five roses sign in that John Lojois video. Right.

Yeah. The best. You can see it. That's when it's super simple when it's like someone that's looking up. Yeah. And then everyone that walks by looks up too. Ah, you got hit with slime.

Idiot. Enjoy your bio slime. Well, it's just, it's just, you can't do that on television. It's still light years behind like the fucking European ones where it's just like

some topless girl just runs up to you and just shoves her her broomer boobs in your face and you go, oh, and it's like, oh, you're on camera. Hey, you're up.

You ever see those? No. I want to be on them. There's like weird, just all the European ones are all just like a girl's walking by and her shirt blew off.

Hey, we kidnapped your family. That's at home right now. What? No. Like Japanese. That's better taken. Japanese and South American pranks are the best

because there are no Japanese. Japanese ones are the best. The one that I saw, it was some South American country. I don't know what it was because I come under the zombie one. It was the little girl in the elevator. Girl in the elevator.

Korea. Yeah. No, no, no, no. That was like somewhere in Spain or something like that. Yeah. And like one of the guys attacked the girl and it was like,

dude, dude, dude. Stop, stop, stop. It's the prank, man. That got bad. The fucking train with the zombies was awesome. You see the one with the corgi with the spider legs?

Yes. Oh, that thing's great. That one's great. You just hook up a corgi with like four extra... Giant spider legs. Four giant spider legs and you pull the mask on it

and then you go into these underpasses and wire them up with fake webs. Yeah. And then just send this to the door of a little corgi at people and from a distance it looks scary to shit. Yeah, that's good.

That guy's whole channel is just that stuff. That's great. I forget his channel name. That's fucking money. Yeah. Oh, dude, he is. We've got a burning question

from... He's burning. From Cuba. What? This is a good job with the podcast. It's a good work. The first question is

do you think smartphones as a gaming platform will ever become like legit or great and like what do you think it would take to get there? Are they just going to be mapped forever?

It's going to take them not being the most popular thing. They can be great but they can't be legit. I have a scenario where they would be legit is one when the... Well, first of all,

a couple generations forward when they're like even better and more powerful and then they have X input, fucking USB devices play a bluggable in and HDMI out. Yeah.

That's when you're now with a legit device. But the controls... We have an HDMI out. I think it destroys the purpose. But that's what it would take to become legit. Probably like

you can already do that. Yeah, it's a problem. Can you do both of those things? You can use your MOGA for your Android device and use a micro HDMI out and you can totally do that. These things.

And a library of games supporting that, of course. Doesn't exist. Doesn't exist. But would need to exist. I don't think smartphones will ever get there because the technology exists

and there are so few games that capitalize on it. Well, putting a USB slot on your phone is already something that people don't want. Well, no, because phones aren't big enough for that. People don't want that.

Like a USB B-slot on an iPhone. A Bluetooth controller would be fucking awesome. What you're talking. Even that. Here's the... You're right.

The issue is not the controls. The issue is not the software. It's the market. As long as the market rewards 10 shitty games instead of one good one, it's gonna be like this. This kind of curation.

Like, think of the PS1. The PS1 was the most popular console and the PS2 also. By fucking huge margin, so was the Wii. And what did we see on them? Scores of trash. You even talked about steam at this point?

Steam too. Just fucking trash as far as the eye can see. And it's a million times worse on fucking... But because the way that the market and the pricing and the distribution worked, you were incentivized

to put out good quality games that sold well. Whereas on the current ecosystem, it's getting like that with Steam and it's been like that forever on phones. Just make 10 shitty games. All you have to do is you have to curate a good 20 minute experience

and hope that people buy it. It's on Apple and on Google to fix this problem. Yeah. And Steam to fix this problem. Unless first parties step in and do major things like that, which I'm already kind of baffled

that Apple hasn't done an internal game studio at this point, because it just seems like a no-brainer. I don't think it's ever going to be fixed. It also comes down to the fact that it'll always be a device where games aren't its primary function.

Yeah, that too. But at the same time, it's like we'll shit on mobile controls all day with buttons on the screen. Fuck off. But not everything has to be action-based. No, the Ace Attorney 5 on iOS is the one to get.

You can do visual models. Apple would sooner make an acquisition than do that. And that's fine. But Apple is like Google in the sense that it's just a giant big... It doesn't operate like other companies do in terms of... No, I know.

But then we saw Amazon try and it's like, well, they tried. Well, they're the outsiders, right? They shouldn't fucking Apple should any non-action-intensive genre can work on a phone because you don't need it. But the focus...

There's the business part of shitty games to not shitty games, which is more valuable. Guess what? It's shitty games and gambling games that are not gambling, quote-unquote. And the other thing is that the focus has to go from time-wasting to game enjoyment.

Yeah, exactly. Games that are time-wasters aren't really good. Games that are made to have fun to play, they're pretty good. And so you can take a game that's fun to play and you can add a time-waster component to it, like a certain mode of the game

that's more suited to a... What's the ultimate synthesis of these two? It's ridiculous fishing. Ridiculous fishing. And that is arguably the best game on mobile. It's fucking awesome. Which I remember speaking to the devs in person and asking them and they said,

yes, our objective was to make the best game on mobile. And they succeeded. Well, because it's just like... I'm sure if people are going to kind of hear what I'm saying, it's like, oh, controller, NHTMI out. It's like, oh, so you want a phone to just not be a phone? Just not be a phone. And it's like, well, yes.

But also, would you ever sit at your couch and play a time-wasting game? Remember, literally the only asset a phone game has is that it's already in your pocket, because it's your phone. That's a huge asset, though. It's a huge asset. But more personally, I don't want to play on phones.

I'd rather play on my 3DS and Vita. And one of the reasons for that is because the fucking battery just fucking burns a hole through the battery. It's insane. My phone battery is like the worst battery I've got. You play any game and the battery just dies. I currently have... Even fucking Dragon Quest on my...

The first Dragon Quest on my iPhone 6 burns through the battery. It is absurd. Just keeping this screen powered on just heats the phone up and it just dies. It helps when you don't play it with the vibrate button, though. But I mean, it looks like a phone. I still, I get two hours of play.

That's like my Vita lasts fucking a million hours. My 3DS lasts what? 10 to 15 hours? I don't know. When they got me to this phone, I asked the guy, what's the phone with the highest battery rating? Because there is none. They're all pretty much the same.

Yeah, so I have a fancy new phone, and I'm in a dilemma that I've been in for like three weeks now, where every morning I wake up and say, hey man, for a Jelly Kit Kat, whatever the fucking new OS is ready for my Sony phone. And I go, man, that's cool. I should update to that, but I haven't played the World Ends with you yet.

So I can't. Because if you update it, because the instant I update it, it breaks. So that problem has to go away. Or at least be somewhat mitigated. Yes, you need a new phone. No, a new phone, it can't be a new phone. No, no, but no, but you don't,

you just keep that one at the level it's at. Oh, and buy a different phone. I don't really want to play World Ends with you right now. So I can't update my fucking phone. How stupid is that? How bad do you want to play PT? Yeah, exactly. I played it.

And I'm keeping it. There you go. As you should. But there's really good games, like I'm looking at my phone, I have like Republieck and Framed and Implosion. Of course. Super Hexagon.

You can play Republieck somewhere else too now. I was going to say like, yeah, Republieck plays better with mouse controls. Implosion would play better with a controller. Super Hexagon's fine. Play Gink is fine. Yeah, Rhythm of Fighters is really good. But at the end of the day,

they would all be the same with buttons. And if you want to make any more advanced games, you're almost always better served with a controller or a mouse. You know, in the case of games like Grim and Broken Age, which are now out on mobile, you're better off with a mouse. Of course.

I have tons of games on this thing and a lot of them are really good. You know, my number one used app on my phone is right now? My fucking Authenticator for 14. Anti-key. Yeah. No, it's this.

But you know, you're right. Like something like Super Hexagon or Cannibal comes across as the perfect time waster. Again, Phoenix Wright, I think is perfect on mobile because it's just tap anywhere in a few seconds. And the time Cannibal came out. That was fun.

Pat's playing Super Hexagon right now. This is the best. This is the best. It's quite good. Well, it's ridiculous for him. It's ridiculous for him. It's ridiculous for him. It's ridiculous for him.

It's ridiculous for him. It's ridiculous for him. I'm saying the best. Have you listened to the fucking... Go watch that Penn and Teller bullshit episode about the best. No, I've seen that. I've seen that episode.

In summary, I wish mobile games was a building so I could burn it down. Yeah. And let's take one from Jake who says... I was fan. Hey, guys. I recently started working on... The email starts with...

Baboo? I recently started working on local duck and donuts and I have to wear an headset to answer drive-thru orders. But every time I go downstairs into the creepy basement to get stuff out of the freezer, the headset starts making piercing static noise just like you're silent hell. Get the fuck out of here.

That's awesome. That's the best. What noise from a video game, if you heard it in real life, would get the biggest freak out of you? This is not fair because my answer is obvious and is also a real-life thing and it's also from Silent Hill. It's arid siren. Arid siren.

Because in the real world, those are terrifying for a very different reason. Yes. Those are good. So I'm gonna try and think of a different one because that's... If you're walking down the street and you hear, now, fight a new rival,

that's not terrible, but you'd go like, What? You'd get alarmed. Yeah, you'd get alarmed. Someone running at you down the street. Yeah. I'm gonna go ahead and say the Sonic Underwater Reason. The Drowny Owl is the same one.

Exactly. But you're breathing air and you don't know why you're hearing it? Yeah. No. Have you ever tried to drown yourself a bit in a tub and just gone like, Oh! Oh!

Like trying to get a bottle of tear out. I'm not trying to drown myself recently. Whoa! Yeah, exactly. Yeah, the Sonic one was the, my go-to is one for that. Yeah, I can't think of anything that's scare-raids, siren-raids.

Siren-raids. Fucking terrifying. Because I don't even have to link them to spooky shit. I just go, Oh! No! It's happening! I think it's X4 later when the warning,

when a boss comes, when you're getting to a boss. Yeah. Oh! It's like really? Yeah, yeah. Well, it could be. Oh, you mean a klaxon?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. No refuge. Yeah, you're talking about a good klaxon. Warning, warning, notice. The only time an air raid siren is not scary is in a good hip-hop song when it's just used to denote the fire. But anyway.

I guess it's about it. All right. Well, that was... Thanks, hip-hop. Thanks, hip-hop. That's about it. Wow! The sound of petering out.

You were supposed to say you're welcome. Just, uh... Slow Jetset Radio! We need more Cuzzaline! Um... For this engine. Oh my god, the fucking spit race. Anyway.

Uh, yeah, I was going to just spoil that part, too. I want to go to Gastown. Spit race. I want a sequel to take place in bullet form town. Bullet form. You'll get it, eventually. Uh, what is coming up on the channel? You know, a lot of hella good stuff

is on the channel right now. This is the best episode so far, I think. It's clearly the best episode so far. Release the Kraken. Stick around. Release the Kraken. Good to hear that. Good to hear that.

Uh, I guess Freedom Planet's starting after Life is Strange. Definitely. Life is Strange is going to be going straight on till morning. It's going to be Bloodborne and Life is Strange for, like, four days straight. So it's going to be a challenge. And, uh, we're, because we're, you know, fucking anchored and tethered to the calendar, uh, Game of Thrones

is coming back. Yeah, right. So... When Freedom Planet's over, I think. Oh, after Freedom Planet? I think so. Okay. Bloodborne will obviously continue.

Bloodborne will continue. Well, we have a busy couple weeks of traveling and things, so we've got to, like, make sure we don't work. Yeah, we're going to Atlanta on Friday. We're going to be at the Momocon. Wait, are you serious? We're going this Friday? It's this Friday.

Oh, I don't know. All Friday. All Friday. Uh, for those that are interested in going to Momocon and no friends are going, just as a, as a, like, a reissue of the information, a live let's watch of, ah, try to dance around it, of Street Fighter,

the animated series. Two episodes on Friday. Which one's the first two? Uh, I, I cherry-picked two episodes. Oh, okay. Is this Fight for Nothing material? One episode has Fight for Nothing material. We're going on a mission.

I got to pay attention to the meeting since I didn't even know about this. Enter the mission. Okay. Matt tried to avoid telling us all. Yeah. Until me and Woolly susted out of the room. You basically susted.

Oh, so I was paying attention during the meeting. Uh, and Saturday we'll have our autograph session with those prints I talked about earlier. Yep. Exclusive. Exclusive. So people are asking, World premiere.

Prince is going to be there. Prince. No fingerprints. Anyway. Uh, for those asking, no, those are not going to be available on the merch store for at least a little while. They're exclusive con stuff.

And I think eventually, maybe after, you know, in times of math. Oh, the idea is that we're going to have them with us whenever we go places. They are really nice. They're fucking cool, man. Yeah. No, because it's an extra for people that are able to come out,

but it's for the real fans. Oh, don't do that. I was trying to avoid doing that. But that's what you're saying. Dude, as if some people aren't feeling bad enough to be at us going like, God damn it. Is Atlanta hot? Have work or I'm not there.

We should put them up, though. Seriously. Like everyone in England fucking hates you. Of course. Everyone in Australia is burning your picture right now. And Sunday has... They're fighting off the drop bears and fucking stabbing the picture. Sunday will have our two hour long panel.

I'm sure it'll be a good one. That's one hour, two minutes. I'm really looking forward to that. I'm not sure if you guys saw 100,000 square feet devoted to the gaming section. That's us? No. It's to the general gaming section.

Which is fucking high. No, we're just sitting in a corner. I don't think it will be. Okay, wait until I take it back. If we got that much space, and we all sat in each corner of the room, with a gauntlet to each one of us, 25,000 square feet per each of us.

We'd have to yell to get our panels out. What's that in meters? A lot. Yeah, there you go. It's like 3.4 feet to the meter. So divide it by 3.4. You should know the king's feet, Pat. It should be a proof.

Fuck the king's foot, man. Exactly. 100 stone. Even the Brits don't use that shit anymore. And it was their king. And his foot. It should prove to be a crotch-raven league. Don't you start that loyalist shit on this podcast.

I'm just saying, the grounds you stand on. Governor General can kiss my ass. There you go. Take that, Queenie. Blow and fucking burn all your money. See you in Atlanta. Yeah. Mama, Liam will eat peaches.

We'll probably all eat a peach at some point. And then everyone will be like, why are you eating peaches at MomoCon? I'll be like, isn't that... How long though? How long are we gonna eat the peaches for? I thought... I could eat for hours.

There you go. But I'm finally back in my castle. Richie. Richie Branson. Welcome to Otaku Castle. Your glorious kingdom is now becoming empire. Ha ha ha ha. Hola.

Welcome to Otaku Castle. Welcome to Otaku Castle.