Castle Super Beast - SBFC 180: The Races Must Not Mix Until Time Cube is Defeated

Episode Date: January 17, 2017

Tim Dori is dead. Long live Tim Dori. You can watch us record the podcast live on twitch.tv/superbestfriendsplay

Big hot boys, big hot boys are so so big and hot that's probably live as you crunch on your on your crunchers. Big, big hot. Wow, who's big hot, you know, who's the biggest hottest? Oh boy star. We could ever have on this podcast ever. Mr. Maximilian and also Mr. Simmons. Those guys are great. You know what's not great? The West Coast. It's unfortunate, but West Coast is the shit coast. Look, I understand, man. It's 10 a.m. over there, dude. It's I'm not gonna, you know, I'm not gonna fault anybody. Those motherfuckers are supposed to be guessing. Wait, hold on. We have no sound. Oh, that was them. I got to do my whole

bit again. Big hot. Big hot. Big hot. Big hot live. The exact same bit again. Same bit again. Big live hot. No intros. We just go right in you guys. Big hot. What's up? I'm here. I'm Pat Woolley. You're here. Hey, hey, I'm here. You know what's not hot? What's not hot? West Coast. It's unfortunate, but the West Coast is cold. The West Coast is a cold pile of dog shit. Oh boy needs to get killed in nuclear explosion. Listen, calm it down. Wow. That was that one. Relax. I intended actually. It's unfortunate, but our, our, you know, who's the big hot star? Our friend. Yeah. Oh, who's the big hot super star ready to our buddies out on our, our buddies on the West Coast. It's really early

for them. Mr. Simmons. So it's your Maximilian dude. We will, we will totally reconvene at some point. You guys, it's totally fine. You guys, it's okay. What's funny is like Kenny and Steve were like, man, that's too fucking early. Let's, let's, let's kick it. Let's kick it to later in the day. Right. And it was, we were able to make that happen last week, but unfortunately it can't happen this week. And then Max and Simmons are like, no, that's good, but it wasn't good. I mean, he did kind of, you know, he did let me know. It's like, yeah, it is 10 a.m. He's like, I can do it, but, uh, but, uh, unfortunately they're drawing these like two hours ago. You know what? It's possible. It's possible and I don't blame them. Right. So

you know, uh, we unfortunately had to roll. I have woken up in the morning, like, you know, that shitty wake up that's too early and gone and just checked on a whim and like these motherfuckers is still streaming. What the fuck time is it for them? Is it six a.m.? Yeah. Yeah, it's rough. You know what? Like maybe this will be hilarious and midway through. They'll just jump in out of nowhere. Oh, my shit's all busted. Um, is there a reason I get in distortion? I don't know. Tighten yourself up, plug yourself in. I'm going to make sure your knobs are okay. I might be blown up a little bit. You sound a lot better now. Your knobs are okay. My knobs are okay. Nobs are okay. Yeah. How's your knob feeling? My knob is okay. Yeah. Um, but, uh, yeah, no, I didn't like getting fucked

in the mouth all weekend. Well, too bad that you shouldn't like that. Maybe some of those photoshops are bads in ways that I'm not anticipating. I know the exact one you're talking about. I know the exact one. You know, that one's made just to make us uncomfortable. Absolutely. Absolutely. You succeeded. Yeah. You won. I like your, your podcast etiquette with your fucking literally eating nachos on the podcast. Hey, hey, this is the third, this is our guest right here. Look, our guest is the nachos in my mouth. I'm sure we can, these nachos are fucking my mouth. We can sell it as ASMR if we needed to, as long as you get dulcet and slow and crunchy. ASMR doesn't need to be dulcet, man. Well, I saw this really gross one where someone, this guy was like, it was like, man eats KFC,

lip smacking noises in like large brackets. All right. And he just eats like fucking nasty ass, like it's not nasty, it's KFC. But the sounds he makes are so gross, but apparently that's the thing that calms people down. And I just don't fucking understand it. Since there's no one here to stop me, let's talk about ASMR. ASMR stands for auto sensory meridian response. Oh yeah, bit just stroke it. Big word, big words. It's a fancy word for a tingle in your spine that makes you feel relaxed when you see some kind of repetitive or simple task. I've been using that shit to fall asleep for like eight or nine years now. And everybody has their different little thing. Some people like ladies with long nails tapping on a light bulb. Some people like watching

guys brick and mortar brick walls. There's all sorts of shit. But the most common one by far is a pretty lady talking softly in your ear. Guess what? That's not ASMR. People are jerking off to that. Oh, that is, that is a corruption of the original intent of ASMR. It's like fucking that one guy in India, Baba, who does the world's greatest head massage. Okay, that's the shit. Hold on. Wait, what if it what if it puts you to sleep? But it gets your big, it gets you big. What if it gets your turgid, but it puts you to sleep at the same time? Is that still a corruption? Usually it would be to get you big and then you get it unbig and then you go to sleep. No, no, no, no, I'm talking about simultaneous. No, it's not that you go to sleep, but you're

also awake. No, no, no, no, no, that's that's not a thing. Now, if you want to go real hardcore, you can go find that binaural shit. You know about binaural binaural binaural. Yes, as in and I'm not okay. So not binaural beats binaural audio binaural beats is a bunch of fucking new age horse shit. Yeah. Okay, that's like, ooh, we're putting magic sounds in your ears. So you'll dick will get bigger. That's bullshit. Now we're talking about binaural audio, like the virtual haircut. Yeah, yeah. And that stuff makes that definitely creates the tingle. Yeah, no, really, really hard. If you don't know what the fuck we're talking about, go find on YouTube headphones with the fucking virtual haircut exactly. And like, no, the snipping of things around your head.

And it also but that's different because that actually relates to like you feeling the haircut experience in the past. Yeah. And knowing what it's like to have scissors. So it triggers like a memory, whereas I don't think most ASMR are about. No, most ASMR is like, why am I like about to fall asleep? Because this lady is clacking around a box of tic-tacs. Yeah, right. Or why why is there's a guy, what's it called? What's the channel called ASMR massage? Scott Dimitri. He's fucking super huge fucking millions of views and shit. And he has these videos in which he takes like a fucking cube of various metals and wood and just clicks them together in a way that for some reason is really relaxing. It's the weirdest fucking hippie

so confusing, man. Hey, man, whatever helps you sleep. People have trouble sleeping. I guess, like, I know that I think I brought it up on the podcast before, but like, like for me, wake, I don't want noises to go to sleep to I want noises to wake up to. Okay. And by far with the bullet and climbing number one for me is the sound of distant lawnmowers cutting grass. That's, you know, I never thought of that, but that is distant lawnmowers in like just like not like just on the block next to yours. No, no, no, no, like one over, right? Yeah. Where the neighbors are doing their Sunday morning, summer, lazy. Oh my God, that is the best. There is nothing that brings you back to let that summer school is out. Yeah, I am going to wake up and

play some fucking games. I'm going to waste my youthful life and accomplish nothing of value. Yeah, that's what that feeling is. That's the number one for me. How do you time that? Well, because like that I find that really relaxing like to wake up to. So if you set your alarm to that, how would that even wake you up? That's the problem, right? You'd probably have to have one of those advanced alarm clocks that like when you press the thing, it triggers and then it like it knows what your sleep schedule is. You know, there's an app that you can put on your bed where like the moment you like the more tossing and turning you do, it reads like what level of sleep you're at and stuff. You can probably have one of those trigger up to the sound of lawnmowers

that starts up really low. You ever see that alarm clock that fucking flies around your room? I have an alarm. Dude, my sleep is the worst, right? As you know. This is known. This is known. So my sleep used to be the worst and then woolly fucking usurped me with his new dying wall being a sleep tech. So when you have that as an issue and you have a job that like needs you to be there sharp fucking 8am every morning, I had to go through a lot of different techs. Sharp at 1pm. Yeah. I had to go through a lot of different tech and the one of them I got from my friend for my birthday was an alarm clock with wheels on it. Yeah. And it just straight up, it beeps and then starts rolling around your fucking room and you've got to chase that shit. Yeah. Alternatives to that.

I think he has a bunch of them, but they also have the one where you have to stand in a place on this mat and solve math problems to make the alarm turn on. My personal favorite. It's one that it's a cube that will break apart on the alarm and you have to reassemble it completely. You have to reassemble it like a logic puzzle in order for the thing to stop. That's sadity, dude. There's one that's like multi a hundred, like some crazy level of decibels that you put in between your mattress and box spring. Oh yeah. And it just makes your bed the worst thing in the world and you can't lie down on it no matter what. That's dangerous. Vibration up your spine. That's dangerous because if you take that out while it's still going,

like you'll fucking blind yourself. Yeah, you heard me. There. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You'll go blind from the sound. Um, yeah. And of course there was there was the, what was the, the wake up club or whatever it was called? Yeah, wake up club. Right. I'm just like that shit is weak sauce compared to. Hey, what's up? What's up? How's everybody waking up? And then it's like, it's you hear this. Yeah. And it's a dick hitting the fucking Vita. There you go. And it's like, wow, I'm woken up now. Yeah. Stay woke. Please, please. Oh God. Okay. Well, welcome to our friend cast you guys. We've been working extremely hard lately on this podcast. I think everyone appreciates it, but the West Coast has failed you today. So it's not their fault. It's fine. And we will

absolutely. No, no, it's not their fault. It's the West Coast. It is, you know what? It is the time zones fault. If we could attack and destroy the time zones loss, then we can free the world. Little did we know San Andreas faults gonna do that for you. Listen, listen, all right. The world is divided into time zones and these and what and these barriers that float across us, you can see them in the sky as you cross over. We need to attack them and shatter the glass so that the world can have a universal time. I don't think that's a good idea. Also, what about Newfoundland? Well, fuck Newfoundland. Yeah, fuck Newfoundland. What do they got up there? They got fish, they got the cod, they got fog, they got, they got really adorable accents. Yeah. And and I actually

I have extended family that's up there now. You have extended family in Newfoundland? No, well, okay, you got some new family girlfriend has has. Oh, did everyone catch that? He's referring to his girlfriend's extended family is his extended family. It was it was simpler. It was simpler. Romantic. Fuck you. I can't give my natural response to that. Anyway, what, at least you're not dating your extended family like I have. Oh, man. Yeah, dude, go for the test. See what happens. I'm not going to go for that test. Go for the fucking. No, I'm not going to go for that. Even if you get like, like, 4% or something like that. It's that that's that zero. Yeah. Yeah. That's why you have to mix

races. That's the only way. Well, race mixing is the future. Wow. I never thought I'd hear it. But here we are. Pushing peace. Pushing peace. It's just practical. Listen, man, the time cube guy, I'd rather have my baby have curly hair than a third arm. The time cube guy doesn't want race mixing. I think maybe he's maybe he's onto something. Maybe until we defeat the time cube, we can't mix races. I think the time zones all lead back up to the time cube, and that's the true enemy of the planet. There are two ways you got in and we got in one way and we got all the way out back to time. So right until you defeat the time cube, races shall not mix. And this is planet Earth. This is this is where we

the cat in plot. Oh, hey, man, how was your week? Not too bad. Not predicted. The time cube get you down. It didn't. It didn't. But sometimes you got to just stop and think about it. You know, you got to just kind of stop and think about what you eventually want to do with your life and how you how you how you're gonna how you're gonna handle the race mix future that is coming. Because after the race war comes the race mix. Yeah. So anyway, because it's all the all the people that are left after the nuclear apocalypse are so they who wants to fight at that point just needs her humanity needs to survive. Speaking of humanity surviving, one thing I did with my week is I went to go see the movie Arrival. Have you heard anything about

us? Okay, I saw red letter media is having the bag on it. What did they have to say about it? They thought it was super cool how it was like, like a not like a smart movie, but like, no, this is not some fucking Hollywood schlock where everyone's gonna go, it's like, no, okay, aliens show up. What do you what do you do? This is a weird problem. It's really interesting. The way it's handled is is the best part about the movie is how smartly it handles the entire lead up from the I'm gonna keep the spoiler free but like the sequel to contact kind of it's not and no, this is different in from a lot of things but then again, there's a lot that I haven't seen. So I can't really make the comparisons from an informed point of view. What I can say is

I think it's really strong in its first act especially because it's one of the most engaging sort of buildups from zero to can you give a rough synopsis of what this film is? Yes, like the premise I guess the basic premise is the basic premise of arrival is one day aliens are here. They're just here. They're waving and we have to figure out what to do about that. Yeah, we don't know what it means. We don't know whether they're hostile or not. We don't know anything. We know that my phone is their phones are not on silent and that's a really not great thing but we have to take whatever signs we can and figure it out. And so then you can already tell that this the way this movie is going to handle that type of material is a bit different

because your main character is not a soldier. Nope, it's explicitly not a soldier. It is a linguist. Yeah, so and somebody they bring in, listen, we kind of want to talk to these fucking things. How do we do that? And everyone goes, um, is it safe though? You know, we don't know. We don't know. So it's really it's about that stuff and it goes from there. It's very, very interesting, very cool. There's though and it brings it brings in a really realistic take on a lot of stuff that is taken for granted in sci-fi but it can escape tropes. So before we go on, I somebody recently told me and it was DMC Redgrave told me about Bloodborne and you remember the make contact gesture? Yes. Make contact gesture is you put one your left arm all the way up and your right arm

all the way up to the side. Praise the sun. Do you know what that actually is? That's a real thing. Oh yeah. And it's a and it shows that human beings can understand right angles and therefore math and that we're intelligent. You're making a right angle with your body and and then when you move the right angle, it shows no, I'm keeping the right angle consistent. Wow. Therefore, I understand that. Yeah. Yeah. Therefore, I'm an intelligent species. The Fibonacci's within me. The golden spiral. Yeah. I thought that was super cool. So just do that shit at the aliens and you're done. Show them the power of your of your of your fucking rotation with your oh no ball. No, that's too far. That's too far. Aliens show up and you're just doing Hammond breathing at them.

I mean, like you're we're fucking out. We're out. Fuck. No. So I think it's it's it's really good in in in how it handles a believable scenario where aliens show up. But it falls. It fails to some tropes and ultimately ends up being okay to pretty good as a result of those tropes starting out not too bad and getting a little bit worse. Are the aliens space Jesus? It's not no has nothing to do with that. Everything about them is super dope. Nothing to complain there. Then we're the problem. The problem is us and our depiction of us, right? Because the true alien all right. Because obviously, you know, like I said, your setting is main character is a linguist and their aliens have showed up. I don't want to give you much more than that because it's a nice ride.

But you have to think about like what the antagonist in this type of scenario would be. I bet I could ballpark it. And while everything else is believable about how the world reacts to these things, your antagonist is not. And it is like, pretty like you have to take some like leaps in logic and you have to kind of turn your brain off to to really like go find that happens. Did you ever see? I guess they got away with that. No, you should see contact. I heard about the end of that, though. It's weird. It's a little weird. There's a really good camera shot and it running towards a mirror. Right. But yeah, contacts pretty cool. Yeah, original book was written by Carl Sagan. No kidding. Wow. Okay. Yeah. So it's an adaptation

of a Sagan book. That's the only book he ever wrote to my knowledge that was fiction. But it's like speculative astrophysics fiction. Well, now I'm way more interested actually. I had no idea. That's very cool. That's a good name to attach there. But yeah, no, so I still recommend it. I think you should check it out. And who would have thunk it that fucking Hawkeye and Lois Lane can carry a movie? What? That face to Jerry and me with runner. Yeah. And then Amy Adams, I believe is like she did good. And it's like, all right, guys, I need Chris Pratt my movie. It's I won't watch a movie unless it has Chris Pratt. There's also and the other there's a little bit of tropiness to in terms of like

pulling on the human heart strings. And maybe it's just my robotic stupid core. Maybe it's my Westworld host brain and body. But here's hoping. But that means you get to live forever. How is that? Why? Okay, I'm like, I'm like, where do you want to go with that? I hope I'm a artificial person, because it doesn't make any difference from my personal objective experience. But it means I get to live forever. By the way, on a side note, you're never allowed to make fun of Matt eating Oreos off the floor ever again. Hold on, hold on. Eating chips off the fucking table, bro. Matt never ate. Whenever I made fun of Matt eating Oreos off the floor, they were never actually off the floor on the cross. That's a that's a that's a fake food

life network post that's like for someone who is obsessed with order and cleanliness and not shitting as much as you are when I am done with that is there will not be a single Cheeto dust left on this table. That's not the problem. It's not the litter. It's the fact that that is a disgusting eating habit. That is really, really close. This is the part of the table where I sit. I keep it clean. Oh my god. Wow, at this. I had like the chips are in the bag. You can't just put your hand in the bag. Well, what happened was is I poured them out because I want to pour some out my hand and then I completely fucked up and overshot my hand and poured half of the bag of chips on the table. Oh boy. And now I'm just eating them off the table. So that was arrival.

And then and then when you're done, you just sweep the dust into the carpet and then it's like it's gone. Just looks like it was never there. Right. Leave it for the for the cleaning person to deal with the one we don't have the one we don't have. Yeah. Yeah. I'm sure we can find somebody off the street. There's a bunch of hobos. How you get ants, Pat. It's how you get ants. You get ants by leaving mold on dishes and by leaving by letting them dry. Yeah, letting them dry after you wash your dishes, leaving them out to dry. That's how you get ants. All right. We're in here. We're in here. Let's get into it. All right. I'm already past it. This is all just there's a there's one core mistake that you made. Okay. When Pat has crazy, absurdist, obsessive tendencies towards food

or cleanliness or whatever, the problem that you have and the reason why you'd ever understand it is that you believe in your heart that they need to be internally consistent. They are not and do not need to be consistent. There is no logic to it at all. I will obsessively clean a table so that the table is spick and span and then leave my garbage bag next to my front door for three days because I'm too lazy to walk like 80 feet to throw it down the chute. Pat, no consistency. You're gross. Your food's gross. Fuck you. You're gross. All right. Here we go. I saw you wear the same sock three days in a row the other day. Oh shit. My Lisa didn't have holes in it. Yeah. Mother fucker putting your shoes. It was a brown sock because it happens to be brown. You weren't it

right now. It's a moose colored sock because my girlfriend bought me wearing it right now. My girlfriend bought me moose colored socks because they're a moose pattern on them. Why are you wearing only one though? That's the weirdest part by far. Well, because I actually kind of missing the other one right now, but it's fine. But I'll tell you what, I tell you what, you put your feet right there on the podcast. Yeah, maybe my feet are clean. You put your feet with the sock hole in them probably two weeks ago. And that's exactly where your chips are, mother fucker. My feet are clean. So you're going to eat dinner off your feet? I would. You're totally clean. All right. And they're clean when you when you walk in, take your shoes off and walk and sit here. Yes. Are they still?

Yeah. Yes. Everything in between is totally. Absolutely. The inside of your shoes. You have many showers I take a day. You'd eat dinner off from the inside of your shoes. I take at least two showers a day. That's not what your shoes, the inside of your shoes that had to get here with the shit outside. No, the sock is a barrier. Oh my God, there's a whole system. Mother fucker. I'm not trying to compete. I'm trying to stay as far the fuck away from it as possible. All right, part of my chip fell apart on the table. Oh, you better better slop it up here. Fuck the bag. Why bother with your hands? Just throw your face at it. Give me a dollar. I'll do it. Just get in there. Fuck. You ever see Trigun?

Yeah. You know how Legato eats a steak? Do you remember that? He just slurps it up super gross. That's cool. Yeah, just get in there. All right. Anyway, no, that was that was pretty much most of it. I'm playing other games that I haven't beaten yet. So I'm not going to really talk about them. But like, yeah, necromancer fucking kicks your ass so hard, dude. Oh, man, you gave it a shot. I'm going further and further and I'm getting close. But they actually like it's one of those games are like, I guess a lot of these. Well, not to not since I guess people don't like hearing roguelike or whatnot. But as it's whatever type of genre you want to call it, there's items you unlock and things you get to make your paths your trips easier the next time around

that like they kind of help. But they also kind of make it harder in ways. It's weird. It's a very weird progression. Yeah, it's like that. You'll go through and you like you unlocked these optional items. Yeah. And then you beat that run and goes the four horsemen appeared in the basement and you're like, Oh, right. The type. Yeah. So that's that's a fun game. And I've been watching because now that the Kickstarter is fully done, I've been watching play throughs and people online playing a kingdom death monster. And my man was talking to me about that, dude. Oh, man, I can't wait. I like it is so weird because that Kickstarter was was like $600. Yeah, absolutely. Yo, I blew past that and I'm looking at the ridiculous expansion. Excuse me,

expansions. And I'm just like, this is madness. And there's no reason why I should be. Oh, my God, it's guts. Oh, my God, it's link. Oh, my God, it's camera. I'm buying a hobby grade. It is ridiculously advanced. Like, you know what it is? I'm going from never owning a gunpla to buying a perfect grade. Okay. Instantly. I've never played tabletop with a board and figures like that. Okay. You know what I mean? I'm like traditional D&D. Give this to me in Warhammer, Pewter figurine analogy. It's beyond that. It's way beyond that. I can't go into the games workshop because it smells and it's filled with weirdos like I bought their paint because their paint has a cool consistency to it. But yes, I've never touched anything like this.

And I've shot way the fuck in by buying the full core pack plus expansion. That's really jumping to the deep end with both feet. It is. It is. And but but it's it's a fucking cool setting. I don't know what to tell you, man. Like, I really enjoy the introduction of that world. And I'm going to be trying to learn how to play despite the fact that it seems like even veterans have a hard time flipping through the cards and trying to figure out how it works. I play an MMO. You play tabletop MMO. Yeah. And and and for what can I what can I say? Like in terms of just gameplay and all that stuff, you can see that that Dark Souls game really just went yo, let's just make it. Let's let's make a kingdom death. But Dark Souls version.

These tips seem to taste better. The ones on the table seem to taste better than the ones in the bag. Extra sodium. Yeah. Yep. That's why that's what will happen. Hey, man, blue cheese. Cheese left out for a while. Maybe I've discovered a new flavor. Your feet. Who knows? How about that blue cheese? Maybe that'll be a thing now. Look, what was your week like? Because that was pretty much mine. Honestly, I've been spending a lot of time doing that. I didn't I didn't watch or play anything crazy. I played more of Isaac and the the difference between a good run and a bad run is more extreme than in any game I've ever seen in my life. Okay, I know exactly what you mean. Because in in like necromancer, which I

guess we can draw parallels because random rooms and enemies and drops, there's sometimes you get a run where you're like, I have a rifle. I have the ability to go through walls. And I'm floating over traps. Okay, so I am a God right now. Flying is is a deal. So yeah, like I had a run in which I got to be second final boss of I think like five or six. And I hit one button and the boss died and I took no damage. Like it's it's that extreme. Yeah. And a bad run is like you get like nothing but health upgrades and no attack upgrades. And you're just like, come on. Yeah, it's and there there are some synergies that break that just break it. I don't know. I don't know what it is. But I've seen videos of like something a guy flies and has

spiders just constantly spot like 1000 spiders just shooting out of his body at all times. Yeah, there was a there was a subset of the fan base that was dedicated to just confusing us with screenshots of this busted shit, unrecognizable builds, I guess we'd call it where it's like that doesn't even look like the same game. Nope. I don't know what's happening that that blood is spiraling around the character in a way that what the fuck is even happening. I played last night and I went to like a cyber room that replaced all my upgrades with like a laser thing that creates like traditional dual analog like twin stick controls. Jesus. Are you every room you go into the thing acted differently? Are you are you on the after birth plus? Which is such

a good goddamn name for expansion. Okay, so you're so you you yeah after birth plus adds more bosses and lots of weapons up to 500 items that it's a good game. As for stuff that I watched the only thing I'm catching up on lucha I felt I fell back. And so this is about three or four weeks old. So if you're way behind you'll probably forget by the time. And if you're caught up you're caught up. There is a Shao Kahn gauntlet of power. Of course there is. Of course there is. And it has bad electricity effects added in post coming off of it. And it may it may be corrupting someone's soul. Oh, God damn it. Yeah, dude, it's just God it's just too much man. It's so good. Also, too much to watch. Also, I want to give a big thumbs up to Johnny Mundo for his cage match

a few weeks ago in which it ended with the most scumbag thing I've ever seen in a wrestling match. It's not him bringing a gun to the ring. But in terms of hard ass cheating, it's it's number one. Okay, it's number one. It defies belief. Like when it happened, I went Oh, okay, it was it was nuts. That's pretty much it for me. I've been playing after 14. I've been playing Isaac. I've been playing others of eternity, but nothing really new. I'm excited for yakuza zero this week. I got to finish off yakuza five, for sure, is that idols section really like tanked my play through doing all the doing all those weird games where you have to like run as herica while like guys jerk off at home on TV. But hasn't it hasn't your dream been to play as her for all

these games now? My dream was to play as her as a melee fighter. Yeah. Yeah. And if you go look, there's the yakuza four mods that swap her and gear use model looks fucking dope. Go play uppers. There's some cool shit in that. I know, including this badass girl that beats the shit out of everything. It's great. So yeah, that there was table chips. This is, you know, Pat, if we can take a word from our sponsors ever so briefly. Oh, that'd be great. I think I don't know. I mean, I'm looking at you. And I'm seeing what's going on here. And you know what I think? Look, man, maintaining a healthy diet is not easy. All right. Everyone eats, but everyone feels like they could be eating better. Wouldn't you agree? Well,

I'm eating chips off this fucking table. So yeah. And it's time consuming. You're right. And it's hard to decide sometimes when you can eat a proper meal and what I get it. I understand. But maybe instead of destroying yourself like you're doing right now on the podcast, you should consider trying Soylent Drink. Soylent Drink. Soylent Drink. That's not that drink that provides all your daily nutrients. All your daily nutrients. It's got, uh, yes, it fulfills more than 20% of your daily nutrients, nutritional requirements, excuse me, I should say. And it's ideal for busy people who don't always make healthy eating choices or skip meals all together, folks. Does that mean I can just drink five of them and I'll be good? I'm saying that it would do you a lot better than what

you're doing to yourself right now. What's inside of Soylent Drink? Well, you're talking protein, isolated from soy, fats from sunflower oil, carbs derived from beets, healthy stuff, and flavors like cow cow, fruity nectar, and subtly sweet original. I absolutely love everything about Soylent and I hope it becomes very popular because I want the pill, right? We're a drink form now and that's great because that just goes, but I want the goddamn food pill. Yeah. Future food is cool. And these guys, these guys are doing it. They're not there yet, but they're doing it. Future food is a cool concept. So I'm out of chips now. Oh, that is perfect. So maybe you should head on down to Soylent.com and use promo code super to get 15% off. Try it out and get yourself a healthier meal.

Do your body some justice. How about it? Sound good? Yeah, that's, that's probably better than me and these chip, this chip dust that I just scraped off the table with my hand and just licking it off the hand like I'm about to do right now. Dude, dude. That's gross. You're hurting yourself. You're hurting me. You're hurting this podcast. I should probably just buy some Soylent. Soylent.com promo code super. Thanks, Soylent. Thanks, Soylent. The timing could not have been better. I even ran out of the of my dust at the time. All right. With that, let's get it to some news, I suppose. No news this week. Isn't that weird? Yeah. Oh, I forgot to describe something. The one thing I did do this week, which goes right into our new story.

Hey, that Nintendo switch got all of its shit announced. Oh, did it? Yeah. Okay. That's cute. From now on, you will refer to me as bike in town. Because we in bike in town, baby. All right, switch later. All right, listen up. Here comes. I think no, no, no, no, no, no. No, I just want to get big ups here. Okay. I think the funniest tweet you have ever made in your life is the is you posting the bike in trailer and going, Oh, hey, this looks pretty cool with a bike in avatar. Your name changed to bike in town and your fucking banner on Twitter being this massive shot of Viking. That is the funniest thing I've seen in ages. So, um, yeah. It's like wearing a fucking dragon ball shirt and having the dragon balls around your neck and being a

fucking resurrection of F and go, Oh, hey, look, Frieza, huh? That's that's an interesting one. So, so here comes woolly the fraud. The I saw the surface level fan that, you know, I'm not really a mecha fan because I don't I don't like robots. You were in that same thread. I just, I just, you know, I skirt the surface with with shows I like and I don't know the cool stuff. So I'm a fake fan, you know. So, um, and as a guilty gear, fake fan as well, someone who, you know, dropped revelator immediately and such. Well, no, but I didn't spend the time on it that I wanted to. And that makes me feel bad. But that's a truth. That's a truth fact. But I always at the very least in the in my head in my soul

felt that I'm like, Yeah, but I don't feel as bad because I'm waiting for my girl. Yeah. And here she comes. Sin was a nice replacement. I enjoyed Sin City. Make no mistake that I enjoyed Sin City. I was a resident of it for excerpt the original release, but now it's time to move to bike in town. Yeah. And, um, I'm not saying those disabled beefers, which we all, we all knew how big those were. Come on. I don't know why people are so surprised about it. We all knew, but I didn't care. Anyway, that's not even the point. The point is, is that, um, no arm to get in the way. I'm not saying that I'm, and I'm, I'm going to get top three, but I am saying at the very least, I'm going to give it a

hearty concentrated effort because I fucking love that character. You all heard that? Well, he's going to get top eight at the next exit tournament. Can fucking firm. He said, he said, I'm not going to get top three. That means there's only top eight after that. That's it all. Pedro, Bryce, fuck all y'all. I'm coming for your spot. No, no, it's going to be bad. Those guys live in is going to be bad. What you can do is just like the head to toe and bike and merch. I can show my face at the weeklies and yeah, I can dye my hair pink and I can scar my eye out. Are you committed or are you not committed? Sir, I'll ever commit to something as bad as blinding myself. Um, what I need to see, what I didn't, I didn't confirm from the

trailer footage and what I want to find out is if she's got her Yosan Sen on the ground again, as Yoku Zen said, like I want to know people who don't know a shit about guilty gear. Yosan Sen or was it Yoku Zen Sen? Yosan Sen. Yosan Sen. It's, it's a sure you can. It's just a sure you can with her sword. Um, and the thing about it is that in her original appearance in guilty gear, it made her the most busted shit in the universe. It was so good. It was so good. So good. In fact, that every time she showed up afterwards, she could only do it in the air because fuck giving her that on the ground. Yeah. And you could tiger knee it for a pretty good move overall, but on the ground, it was goddamn fantastic. I would love, I would be excited.

Yeah. If they gave it back to her on the floor, that'd be very exciting. That would be fun. That combined with Tatami Gaishi and the, you know, her, her Alpha counter setups, I'm going to have some good fun. I'm going to have some fun. I'm going to have to learn how to play with one hand, but I'm going to have to know we're not doing that because it's biking. Also, not because you're jerking off. Of course, because biking has one hand. What are you talking about, dude? Of course, clearly. Definitely. Also, we got the answer. Yep. If you were a fan of chips enough, becoming the president of the United States and still being a ninja boy, oh boy, has guilty gear got something for you. For you now. Yeah. Because here we've got the Donald Rumsfeld to

his admission. You've got the secretary of state who's basically a business ninja who has the coolest glasses. I've seen on a character design. He's got fucking like he's got Sam Fisher reading with a lens for his third eye. It's so cool. He throws business cards and he's voiced by, I think, Sekito Mikazu. So that's cool, too. Definitely better than Bedman. Yeah. Well, yeah. Yep. I saw, dude, I saw like a post someone made where they're like they saw the silhouette for Bedman and they're like, Oh, like, what do you think it is? And then the guy just drew in Robokai sitting in a throne with all these crazy like gears and faces coming out. I'm like, Oh my God, that's infinitely better than what we got. Bedman sucks. Leo's cool. I mean,

he doesn't suck, but I hate Bedman. It's it's I don't like a bed man. His move set is interesting and fun. But I like VHS rewind. I would have preferred Robokai sitting in a throne. That would have been amazing. I never liked Robokai once they made him his own character, which is really backwards from usually what I usually ask for. That's madness. But I liked his I liked his alternative Kai move set better. No, no, no, no, I totally love Robokai. The character is much better as Robokai. Also, he's got the best song in the franchise. Yeah, Vortex Infinitum. If you go look up the guilty gear Korean Sharp Reload, I don't care for that Korean music. That's fine. But that song on its own is to me number one. So, you know, anyway,

biking, man. Thank God. Thank God. At least they at least they know that that that's what people wanted. The the poll was not ignored. Because it would have been ridiculous if they just fucking completely went over what were clearly the results of their of that of their their testing. Dizzy came in first. Biking came in clear seconds. Yep. And you and like, where's Bridget at, man? Well, that's the only question was Bridget. It's the Sakura problem. You bring Bridget back. Bridget's an older man now. Not aging, but still wearing the same thing. May is like 20 years old. Okay, so I don't know. You're solved that problem. We don't know. What do you do? You'll take your solve that problem. That problem solve. Do you just have it like

same voice, but so you pull an Edward furlong with it? Sure. Terminator two. Oh, while they were shooting Terminator two, he hit puberty and his voice cracked. That sucks. And they had to like redub him to sound younger towards the the later shots and principal filming because because he was right on the bridge of becoming a man and his voice hilarious. Yeah, his voice got too deep. I don't know what they do with that. They'll figure it out. I have faith in in in team red. Um, so that was guilty gear. That was guilty gear. Now we can switch back to what you were trying to say. Oh, man. Wait, what? It was like this. Yeah. No, no, there you are. We're doing the stupid lean that the guy did from the splatoon. Wow, that motherfucker looked like a dumb

ass. You know, someone pointed out that someone pointed out that he was making a two and I didn't realize that he was making a two. Whatever, he looked like a jackass. He looked pretty dumb no matter what he was doing. But uh, yes, spl we got to splatoon as well as a bunch of other switch announcements. We got Mario Odyssey waiting for the sequel or the prequel, the Ilya. Oh, that is that is really bad. Unless it means that like unless it means Mario has to go. He has to throw his hat through fucking. Yeah, yeah, yeah, right. Bowser gets his woman or Luigi for that matter and mama Mario walks into the ocean out of sadness that wishbone episode and then there's a giant oo black that gets blinded and then he goes what's your name and Mario says nobody and then she goes

nobody's blinded me. That'd be fucking dope if they do a lot of that stupid shit. Okay, who was who were the who were the who were the the fucking I don't god damn remember who would who who would be fucking? What's your name? Callisto? What's what's your name? No, I'm trying to remember the not the nymphs but the the sirens. Yeah, the sirens, right? But I'm thinking about remember he stayed for like a whole year fucking some broads was like demigod or whatever and would that be Pauline? Would that be Pauline? That'd be Pauline. Should be Pauline. Yeah, yeah, yeah, absolutely. Yeah. And then you could have a bunch of like cheap cheap style like sirens that are singing so beautifully that they they attract him in and people are walking over like like I'm gonna fuck

that fish. And everyone else on Mario's boat eats at all the toads. They get fucked. I don't I don't know where to start with this switch announcement. There's a lot. Okay. How about we start at the top price? It's 300 bucks 400 you Canadian $300 USD. Who's talking to me? I got a lot of people. Yeah, so messaging me that my dick is out or something. Don't worry about it. It's fine. That's kind of important to me. Okay, well, put it back in and wipe all the Dorito dust off of it. Lurch. There we go back in and we'll talk about the switch announcement. So I think we got to we watched it and we got to just like raw react to what we saw. But a lot of details came out afterwards that once again, another Nintendo event in which like 10 minutes later, you're like

why didn't you announce this at the goddamn event? All the stuff you kind of were looking for details on why the fuck didn't they announce Mario Kart at that event? That is baffling. They opened with footage of it. Yeah, but they didn't say when it was coming out. No, they didn't. But I mean, showing it off is enough for the like the height. Yeah, so so we saw going in alphabetical order, we saw one to switch looks cool, which is really smart. It is a first party take on JS joust. I really think the fucking impressions coming back from the events that people want to says that the HD rumble is on point. And you can totally feel up to seven balls in your hand. Oh, man, the cow utter is never has never been more real. Yeah, like it even juices when you pump.

You ready for that? Yeah. Yeah, that's what I thought. That's what our Nintendo R&D, Nintendo R&D spending money on making sure a cow pump simulation feels just about right. Someone had to go down there and do the research and compare it. I don't think that's that they just said, Hey, Takahata, that's hey, no, no, no. Hey, you grew up on a farm, right? She know and she knows like, yeah, totally. I've milked cows all day. Hey, she knows, does this feel like no, no, no, no. And he's like, no, it's not. It feels like a dick, man. It's not how we that's not how we do things. You see, when was the Lion King made when the Lion King was like, when the years ago,

like 94 and back then they got lions in front of their artists so that they can draw them properly to make sure that they were accurate artists who didn't make it. So Nintendo now in 2017 is absolutely going to have some cows in the in the treehouse or not in the treehouse, but in the development studios in Japan, simulating it'll give young parents a chance to practice for pregnancy. Perfect. We have arcade archives, which is currently to be announced. No date on that. We have arms. Arms looks dope. Arms looks really cool. Um, still fully attached to the idea of getting little Mac in there as a final boss or something, but I brush in to beef, but, but at the same new IP, new characters make them cool.

Some of it can be a retweeted legs, the Bayonetta and Jen doing their leg kicks. That's fun stuff. Yeah, man. Good job on new IP. This is how you level up. We boxing, which was probably everyone's favorite part of, um, my dad crushed it on golf. But you know what? No, golf and baseball were huge. Yeah. It's hard to say. The golf one was like a legitimately decent golf game. Excuse me. It's hard to say what, uh, actually, I think boxing was actually the most, but amongst my friends, because the controls were a little off amongst my, but it's the one I played the most. And it's one of the people I know played the most as well. You know, the direct competition. You're telling me that the young woolly

boxer in training. It's crazy. Enjoyed the boxing game more. What a far-fetched idea. They announced, um, they announced Disgaea 5 complete. Yeah. Spring 2017. Dragon Balls Universe 2. So, you know, of course, your ports are coming. Dragon Quest Heroes 1 and 2. Skyrim Special Edition. Farming Simulator. I can't believe farming. That cracks me up. Why not? Why wouldn't you? That's awesome. That's great. When you need to farm on the go, sometimes you need to travel. I want to be on a plane and look over and some motherfucker in a business suit is playing farming simulator on his switch. That is my dream. Well, look, some, you know, sometimes you just got to, you gotta let

driver simulator on there. European. What the fuck? You know, Euro Truck Simulator. I wonder where you just drive a truck. You're not talking about Desert Bus. No. Oh, you don't know? Hold on. Let me. What's the name of those fucking games? Is it just realistic truck simulation? And that's it. That's it. Okay. Yeah, there's train simulators. I believe it. Totally. There's a sequel. Yep. Uh, we got whatever. Obligatory. Yes, Euro Truck Simulator 2. Obligatory farming simulator plague joke. Here's the fucking box art. That is that is a truck and there's fire behind it. All is like, do you want to drive from Manchester to

London? I don't for three hours. I really don't. Why do that when you can play big rigs? Anyway, we've got FIFA. Oh, the FIFA's. We've got Fire Emblem Warriors. The FIFA's got to be based on the PS3 and 360 versions. Ouch. Fire Emblem Warriors. That's a cool idea. Cool. I stand by that. That seems like the most obvious fit in the universe. Yeah. Um, you know, in characters all with different weapon types. I feel like, is it just me or like, are there now their Brent, like the Mousseau guest star things? They'd only like, it felt like back in the day, they do like one series at a time, whether it's Fist of the North Star or Gundam. They've been doing more guest ones than Dicey Warriors.

And now it's spreading out. Yeah. Yeah. There's more guest than there are mainline things. A lot of people know about Lubu and Kau Kau and those guys. And they can play Mousseau-Mousseau for that. But Ryu Hayabusa's in it. But like, hey, what about, what if it was Kron though? What if it was Guts? Well, yeah. What if it was like Lucina? Yeah. Yeah. So, you know, that's cool. You've got Untitled SMT game. Well, like, okay, Frontier Days. You've got Has been Heroes. I don't know what that is. I don't know what that is either. It appears to be a game from Frozen Bite. Don't know who that is. It is a roguelike strategy action game. Okay, cool. Sure.

We have I Am Setsuna, of course. That's a good, that's a good, that's a good port. Good job. It's not counter-trigger, but apparently it's quite good. No, putting that on your system, not a bad idea. Just Dance 2017. You gotta have that dance. Breath of the Wild. Oh, what's that? Yeah. What's that? So, apparently, what was it like Calamity Ganon? Calamity known as Ganon, or the Calamity Ganon. Yeah. Yeah, it's like, apparently that is like a translation thing where they had to like, in Japanese, it was like, it was called this like Hurricane Ganon or something like that, or I forgot the exact word. And they basically had to like, change it to Calamity, which sounds radical. So, that's cool. That would explain the

hurricane-looking aura around the castle. Of course. Being more literal. Yeah. And the voice acting that we saw in that trailer. Upon second watch, some of it's a little bit wonky at points. I think I was just, I was kind of like enamored with, oh my god, they're doing it. I don't think anyone's going to be happy with their dub because I've watched those voice acting comparisons. And there are winners and losers amongst every version of that dub. I think Plague of Grypes, our pal Eli, summed it up pretty great where Japanese Zelda wails as her spirit is torn asunder and English Zelda sniffles. Right. Right. Right. That is the most different I've ever seen a line reading between like the same line and the same character. And it's just

Asterix, Zelda cries Asterix. Right. What, if the option exists, which one are you going to play? Yeah. You don't know which way to go with it. I don't know. I will have to get more comparisons over time. As long as they keep Link as Viral with his stupid barks and shouts, then I'll be fine. I think, I think I'm thinking of a future in which I literally die playing Breath of the Wild because, okay, because, and someone get to this, somebody make a video of this, please, I'm too lazy to do it. And it's just when Link set something on fire, Terry's like, fucking fiddle fury one burning comes out of his mouth and just Link's voice, like his grunts, his barks are just replaced with Terry's fucking shit English. Like that's how Link talks. Link

talks like Terry Bogard. I just like the problem, because I remember when you were saying throughout the trailer when we were watching it, like say something, say something, and then what if he opens his mouth and you get they like how like that would be annihilating? No, it's like that would be just absolutely dream shattering. It's like it is no surprise that he was involved in the troubles or some shit. I don't know, man. I don't I don't subscribe to the the link has to be silent like I don't subscribe to it either. But if you're going to get him to talk, then I hope it's good. It's got to be in Nolan North. I mean, out of his mouth, but I think I think that like Nintendo is firmly committed to the silent protagonist like feeling, you know, the whole

like we don't want to put words in this person's mouth because you're supposed to be able to relate to them. Link says it's got to be you. If Link says anything in that game, it will be literally the last thing to happen in the entire game. And it will be like the word Zelda or whatever, like maybe, right? But I really doubt they're going to go for it because if you can still name yourself when you start the game, that to me is enough. I know it'll be you'll you'll finally beat in Calamity Ganon and he'll turn to Zelda and I go, you know, so truly we are the breath of the wild legend of Zelda. No, it's just it's straight up like if they can still push you start a new game and you put your name in, they want you to be the adventurer. I hope they don't

do that. That's what I can't stand that. Yeah, but that's what it's been. And that's what they know people are used to. So why would they change my own characters? You know, give me a name. Yeah, I agree. It's why whenever I play like those old RP computer RPGs that like create is a full blown creative character. I always refer to my character not in game and make my own name. But as like in Baldur's Gate one, it's the ball spawn and fall out. It's the the the Vault Dweller, etc. etc. Because that's at least a goddamn name that people know that you can talk about that person. Yeah. Like really for Link is anybody you get if you go is anybody go yeah, so me I was playing as as Jimbo and I was going through the forest temple and somebody goes

fucking what? But listen, I mean Link somewhere around the world, like from the 90s and forward some like Gregory has been the hero of time. Gregory has been the hero of light. Gregory has been the man who defeated Ganon every time in a fucking throw and it's always been Gregory. Greg you're fucking so why would that he doesn't want that to change now because he has a legacy of Gregory. You understand and that's why they do it because for that guy that's what it is man. Yeah, that fuck I know I know breath of the wild looks fucking dope really looks really good. Looks really good. I really hope that the overworld is not the Middle Gear five type of overworld and where you just kind of get bored of the same things. The world map that they've

shown like that great plateau which was the demo area they've said is only about 2% of the entire world and that is too small like that is worrying. That's a big big goddamn open world. It's huge but like the scale of worlds to how interesting they are are two completely separate metrics and I think now that we've played a lot of games that have giant maps that's not a big a big deal anymore. I think it's like it's nice to know that it's that huge and it's immersive but you want the world to be interesting and I would much rather that be half of it half of its size with more density we'll have to see how what the content is like. Yeah, I still want you know dungeons and oh there will be. Of course I mean we know there we know

there are we know that you find those little there will be 1 billion percent a bunch of outdoor dungeons that it is just a box canyon so like that's why you can't it's a dungeon even though it's outside but it's a box. And we've seen the demos for like you know all the weapon dungeons and things like that like yeah that's all gonna be there but you know what I'm getting at just like there's been a bit of a precedent of like games that are have a huge map and then they put you send you into missions on the map and then you're like all right I'm 30 hours into this I really do kind of get it even even like Final Fantasy right like even 15 where you at the very least can just go all right I'm just gonna ignore it. I'm gonna be I'm done

I've expanded as much as I wanted to have wasted as much time as I wanted to and now it's time for me to focus. I've discovered as many new recipes as I desire. Exactly. Where are you at in 15? Give me a chapter. I just finished the cup noodle fucking thing and zoom in on Gladio's fucking face. It's really good. Yeah yeah so he just came back and then we did that. So that's chapter eight. So yeah you still got a ways to go. Oh yeah yeah that's fine. Um there was uh Minecraft and Minecraft and story mode you know whatever. Mario Kart 8 Deluxe. Yay. New tracks. Yeah um Mario Kart not much to innovate at this point. You can hold two items. Yeah just throw which is what you could do like in the arcade game and in Double Dash and yeah

you know not much to do with it really just. I saw some guy saying how will this change the balance. There's no balance. It's fucking Mario Kart. You get better items if you're dead last. That game is fucked. Play it for fun. Yeah I you know I at some point like I heard 8 was like an amazing game and I was like cool it's good to know that like there's a really fun Mario Kart but I'm kind of like tired. I will play it. The places where I'll play Mario Kart will be like at like my girlfriend's parents house or something like you know with like their their kids are playing it or whatever. It won't be something that I'm necessarily going out of my way to play but hey kids you're playing a baby game. No no not melee. Yeah it's fine Mario Kart.

It's fine. Um they uh this is this list uh Nobunaga's ambition sphere of influence with power up kit. What? What? Really? Yeah uh Mina, Day Y Y, Spelunker. So there's that. That's probably Spelunker. Oh no Spelunker. Spelunker. Monster Boy and the Cursed Kingdom. Oh that's cool. And of course we have the No More Heroes Untitled Project. So I can actually branch out of that into the story where No More Heroes for the Switch is coming and it's completely new. It's not a port but it's not coming in 2017. No hell no it's not even started. Yeah so uh there was an interview with Suda afterwards in which he specified that uh yeah they totally uh he forgot to say on stage that just just to clarify this is not a state this is not

going to be a port you know and uh just kind of forget about it for now because it's going to take some time. That No More Heroes that do that No More Heroes announcement like we'll talk more about it but like this games list is small and the fact that they brought Suda up there to talk about a game that hasn't even begun development is weird. Well but it's cool that they're like yeah this is happening. Sure but I mean they haven't like not a single god damn it like all that exists of that game is that piece of art. Well yeah maybe a GDD. But clearly they need as much news as they can get so why not scrape it a little bit you know why not scrape it. Project Octopath Traveler. That looked cool. That looked really cool. That was a sprite game made by Square. Yes yes okay

right that that game like I was staring at. Yeah I thought it was I thought it was going to be a saga game or something but the lighting the lighting style on it was was pretty pretty amazing and that was the one that came right after um what should we call it uh the SMT T's yeah of course um yeah I like more details on Project Octopath because like that was a completely I don't know if there's anything that's looked like that. No nothing it was it was pretty unique. And uh we have Puyo Puyo Tetris. Okay good. We have Rayman Legends Definitive Edition. Got it. We have Redout. Redout is I know that name why am I blanking on it. Yeah Redout is slightly familiar but I'm not uh Nicalis. Nicalis Racing Game. Okay. Right um and they're all Nicalis is also

putting out Afterbirth Plus binding of Isaac. We have Romance of the Three Kingdoms with the power up kit. Yep SMT. That's certainly a goddamn amiibo thing right. I don't I mean probably maybe I don't know uh but uh we have uh SMT on title project. Yeah. So why I mean like is it is there a chance that it's not five? Yeah yeah if there if well that that is another game that has not started development or or has just barely started development and all they have is that CG trailer right. So it probably hasn't even been decided what the actual title is going to be. Like not not and I don't mean in terms of like showing it to us but like I bet they're still feeling it out but they're in pre-production. I really hope it's five. I hope it's five. I

really hope it's five. Well because there's weird stuff that they said it's like oh we don't know if it's going to come out to the west because SMT is not as popular as Persona and it's like oh no come on man. At the same time it's not like come on bro. SMT spinoffs are like oh no an SMT spinoff god forbid. Yeah because I know who's know how it's a good series. Nocturne is pretty cool. That's not a spinoff. That is a proper title. That's a proper title. Okay digital devil saga. That's a fucking spinoff. Boy oh yeah that's some weird ass shit. They go they go all over the place. Yeah good that's fine. That's totally fine. Fighting this infinite brahman fucking weirdo shit. Oh my god the last boss. The last boss is

so cool. It's so cool. It's just if you ever wanted to like just get off on your yeah your your deities from different cultures and just fucking let's see a cool artist just fuck concepts taken to the infinity shit literally to the infinity for that matter. Um we have uh Skylanders. Skylanders. Imaginators. Okay well you know that maybe got snipper clips. Yep cut it out. That game looks more interesting than I originally would have anticipated. It's a puzzle game in which you cut out parts of each other's bodies to solve platforming challenges. That's pretty cool. It's very interesting. Yeah that sounds pretty good. There was a video going around of what it looked like some one of the one of the guys trying to

shove the other guy's whole body up his ass. How do you actually um do the snipping? So you have uh uh your character has a shape like a like a like a u or like a pencil end or like a line and what you do is you can rotate that shape 360 degrees and you hit a button to clip and you can clip off pieces of the other person to make them smaller so that they can get through a crack or put a uh like a uh like a curve in them so they can pick up a ball or shit like that. Okay. And then you can reform yourself to the full version if you need to start over. That's pretty interesting. Yeah it's really cool. Okay cool. Like the name is goddamn terrible and made me think it was gonna be bullshit but then I saw some videos like no it actually looks pretty

interesting. And like I said you you can jump on top of each other and look like you're trying to shove the other player entirely up your ass. Yeah perfect um perfect. It's kind of out your friends ish. Perfect bullshit co-op yeah exactly. Uh we have um the new Sonic game. Sonic Mania. Sonic Mania. Still looks good. Hope it's not shit. Uh I trust Christian Whitehead I believe is his name the guy that did the amazing ports. Yeah that uh that stage that is like the movie theater with the purple on the blue looks so fucking amazing. All just from an art perspective. All footage of it looks amazing. But that that particular stage stands out to me as like the best looking Sonic level I've ever seen. Well because here's the thing right prior to this game

the the trailer for this game existing I feel like Freedom Planet took the goddamn mantle and ran with it and Freedom Planet had the best Sonic stages that we that weren't in Sonic you know. And it feels like Sonic Mania is like okay no wait we need to properly put some of this new shit in and like make it as fun as that at the very least or take some of those concepts and that that evolution of Sonic platforming and and update it to actual to actual. I did not catch this until I rewatched the trailer. I was not I did not know about the drop dash until a few days ago. Oh um the ability to spin midair. Yeah you do a spin dash while you're falling. Game changing. Boy game changing. Howdy that's

actually a really good addition to that. That was one of the first things that uh that was announced yeah that's really really smart because sometimes you want to jump and just be like I want to keep going. It's a lot better than Sonic's like weird shield jump that he had in three. That thing was ass. That was pretty dumb but also it's it's lame when you have to stop hold down and then do the next charge up when you when you could just do it with while you're still moving. I got pretty good at insta dashing. That's why Sonic Generations is trashed. All right let me tell you why Sonic Generations is trashed in one quick thing. In Sonic 2 and 3 if you hit down on your d-pad and then hit jump you could you could instant spin dash to a certain speed

within like three frames. You could do it super fast right? Yep. If you do that in Sonic Generations you just dribble out like a weak cum out of a dick. Just slowly just it's weak. That's really weak. That's terrible. Good Sonic's like a fucking. And it disappoints everybody. It's like a blue ejaculate at the speed of sound. And that's what you want. Just from one tap. And that's what you want. Pat wants it full force. Yep. All over him. Yep. Blue and Sonic. There's nothing more disappointing than when you're looking and you're waiting for the full force. Yep and it just dribbles out and hits the floor. Yep. Yep. Glad to know you're gonna get it. Yeah. Full force in the face. That's right. And then. Glad I've upgraded to face now in this new fiction. Well once it comes out

it's gotta go somewhere. Oh wow. Okay. Yep. Yep. Yep. Just uh just hold your hands out. Oh come on. All right. Come on. Now you're now you're making Sonic gross. Now Sonic's a family animal. Listen Splatoon is a family game. It's fun. So apparently you fuckers killed that other sister with your vote. Like I didn't fall to dude. Dude. Okay. So look now flying over my head. Now that the dust has settled. Oh my god. Callie and Marie. Is that it? Yes. Okay. And we have all we I don't know if you recall. Which one was which? Callie is pink and Marie is green. Marie is white hair. Marie is white hair. Okay. Marie is the one that survived. That's correct. Yeah. Okay. And like dude all I can say is we all I think despite our levels of security on making sure that we

didn't say who the right one was we were all on the same page. Even me. It was very clear. Even I thought that Marie was the better. It was very clear. There was no other vote. There was no other vote but you didn't want her to fucking die. At what cost man. At what cost. That's that is the greatest and saddest twist and it's all come off of that one screenshot that I think zone noticed it. It looks like she's on a funeral. It really does because you're like why are you wearing like this the sad black like outfit and you're facing back to the camera and like damn it that last black fest was to decide who lived and who died man. That would be I want more of that. I want like Capcom has a big vote which you like better Ryu or Ken. Yeah. Whoever loses

dies. That's what you get fans. That's what you wanted. This is what you wanted. Oh dude it was that's fucking great. I like that lore and we'll see what's going on with it. Fuck man. At the very least I imagine that like there will they will have her in a more prominent spotlight. Yeah. Knowing that the results are are what they are. Yeah. Yeah. So we had we had fucking Splatoon. We have state of mind which is not familiar with us at all. Yeah. There's just a piece of art for it really and it's being made by a company named Daedalix so I don't think there's there's a ton to say about it already announced game

for other platforms that's being put to also to the switch but aside from that I don't really know anything about it. Steep is coming. Oh yay. Super Bomberman are mini buys edition is coming. What's your problem? I don't want mini buys in my fucking bomber man. You don't like mini buys. I don't like mini buys. Let's get used to it. Wow. Okay that's fair. Drop a bomb. Spend money drop another bomb. Maybe there's some more chip dust on this table I can eat. Uh you know look you know what the you know what the best part about Bomberman is? You know what the best part about Bomberman is? You just said borrow man. Bomber. Okay I heard borrow. Do you know what the best part about Bomberman is? There's fucking infinite versions of

the game and if you don't like the one that's out right now you can pay the play the one that came out five months ago. Okay. That's fine. You know like Bomberman is a very alive franchise and I don't see it going anywhere anytime soon. That being said what are the actual micros on that? I don't know. Probably like extra bombs. So we're like you start the game and you only have five bombs. Well where'd you hear about them on the microtransactions? I don't remember now. Oh really? Okay somebody I think it was my best news source some guy on Twitter. Some guy on Twitter. Let's just confirm that before we're super duper. Well it's Konami so we don't really need to give them the benefit of that. We can just shit on them. Shit in their

mouth. Oh sure. But let's just verify for absolute certain. I'm gonna type it into Google. Does Bomberman have mini buys? Yeah do it. Do it and let us know. In the meantime we can talk about Super Mario Odyssey. Yo that game looks dope! And you got your hat tossed. That looks cool. Looks like we said nothing else to say about it besides really snazzy looking Bowser. Cool looking worlds. Weird ass humans. By far the most interesting thing is that guy looking at Mario and Mario looking at that guy. Which they call attention to. And they're like yeah Mario's a fucking freak ass weirdo. Weird that they actually would emphasize that because with Sonic you're like well look at these weird animals whatever they're animals. You don't have to think about that just assume

that they're another race entirely. But with Mario why would you actually. Oh good job Plague. Thanks Eli. What did what did Plague say? I don't know why you said that. Oh no no that's for us. Okay well. That's private. Oh I see. That's private sexy jokes. Well anyway. I think that the fact that you call attention to Mario being a completely different weirdo freak assoid. Have we ever seen another human being besides Luigi and Peach? No. And Daisy? No. And Mario and Luigi are from the real world but everybody else is from the Mushroom Kingdom. So I guess Mario and Luigi are just freak assoid little people with weird voices and like their speech is weirder than uh than their stature right because maybe they're just a little

bit more right. There's that too. But the speech the way they talk is fucking weird. Yeah. And that's fine because it's all cartoony and shit but then you see man in business suit it's like hello Mario how are you today. Like that's fucking weird. Because like you go to the extent they cast with like you know Rosalina looks normal while Luigi and and and Wario are like more of those alien weirdos whatever the fuck they are. Like you call them alien weirdos. Well because like imagine if they made a Wallace and Gromit movie like a new one and then just made it like live action with Wallace and Gromit. It'd be horrifying. That would be really scary. It'd be super terrifying you know. So like it's so weird that this is the canon that they chose and they chose to not go

with a world of people that look like Mario-ish people. Because all the people in Sonic Unleashed for example look like they belong in the same world as Mario. They're these kind of weird Pixar people. Yeah. Yeah. You know. And I just they just didn't go with that art style. I don't know. I don't fucking know. Do you think Mario's going to find a regular human sized love interest like Sonic did? Not in a game with Peach in it. The whole thing is is that he has to stop Peach from getting married. What if what if the end is like he's like ah fuck it Bowser you can have her. I got a human. Aubrey Plaza over here. Well I don't know. What do you want me to do with that? I got nothing. I don't know. I wanted to go weird

and see what happened and what happened was nothing. Aubrey Plaza is cool. She's great. I like her. She's got that bitch face. Resting bitch face. Yeah. It's great. All time. Siberia 3. Yep. It's coming out. Those are good adventure games I hear. There's are they developed in Montreal? I don't goddamn know because I feel like I see ads for them a lot here and I think it's possible that they're developed in the city. That's such a weird thing like the game that is made in the city that you live in gets more ads in the city that you live in when it's actually should be like yeah I know I know Assassin's Creed is made here. Yeah. I know. I don't know. Maybe other people are not as knowledgeable as us.

I'm not sure. Let's see. It is made by Siberia is made by Benoit Socal. Okay that sounds very and that sounds super Quebecois. That sounds Quebecois. Yeah. Yeah. Oh no he's Belgian. Never mine. Whoops. That other other French. Never mind. All right. And then of course we have Ultra Street Fighter 2. This is this is cool. This is weird. This is cool. This is both. We're both right. I'm on I'm on board man. I'm also on board but this game is weird. There are changes that are fucking Gonzo in this game. You can tech throws. So tech throwing tech throw techs existing in Street Fighter 2. That's that's a new game. That's crazy. Yeah. That's a new game. Yeah. I mean throw escapes. That may be the hardest nerf to ball rock that's

ever happened in the history of anything. I wonder if you can still soften throws as well or if it's like if you imagine those are exclusive like that input would be weird. Would it just be a late throw tech. Yeah. Okay. A late techist is a saving throw you know like like the flip out. Fuck all that shit. Violent Ken though. You know what though. Did you see his moves. Yeah. It's just the dash. Yeah. It looks cool. It looks cool like Violent Ken. Yeah. Violent Ken. You know. And he does the same. I just like the Violent Ken is now like the concept. Yeah. It's now hard like that Capcom. Yeah. It's Capcom. Yeah. As opposed to SNK. That's fine. I like that. Someone at Capcom said yes. Violent Ken is a thing. And either of you

neither of which are balanced in any way shape or form. I believe there's a video of a burnout fighter doing a start to dizzy in one shot. So that's good old street product. You know not really meant for the balance. That's a that's a that is a weird ass new version. This will never become the definitive standard. It's always still going to be super turbo 100 percent. There's no way this thing is going to be balanced. No. No. The FGC hated HD remix. I like some of the things HD remix did. I like that Honda's short headbutt goes to fireballs actually. Yeah. No. I mean that Ryu's fake fireball was like it's so strong. It's so strong. But a lot of the the general FGC hate the HD sprites and don't like the changes. So it's super turbo will still 100 percent be

the definitive thing. And you know what like as long as that exists within the game then like yeah. But this will be fun to fuck with for sure. Yeah. Yeah. Exactly. You dig around with it. You do dramatic battle which exists in it now. You can use the old sprites. And if you saw that teaser shot that was in the trailer I don't know if you caught it but there's a flash at the end before the tease of there's a before the tease of Ken and Ryu. Violent Ken and you were you I should say there is a shot of a first person Hadoken. Yeah. Street Fighter five. Yeah. Quality. Very models are by that being shot out at a shadow loose soldier in the realm of the four Kings and a layer of the four Kings. And I think that is straight up a switch gesture based first

person throw Hadoken's out mode. That sounds terrible. I think they're putting a bonus mode in there that's going to be just first person Ryu fight sounds like shit. Well I mean hey look first person was terrible in Bushido Blade. It was terrible in Tekken. I can't wait. Yep. I think I'll make for a good video. I think they'll figure it. There you go. Yep. I think they'll figure something out. Please put more terrible gimmick things into your fighting game so we can make shitty videos making fun of them. Thanks guys. But yeah and I like I like the the naming convention to Ultra Street Fighter to the final challenges like it never got until until there's another DLC character and it's called the finalist challenge for matching service.

Oh boy. So is that it for the the Switch games that are announced? Wonder Boy. Okay. And Xenoblade Chronicles too. Which looks great and I see a Zohar which means nothing to you Woolly but it means a lot to people who played Xenogir's. There's also okay you know the sword the red the red blade sword that specific shade of red. Wait the Monado? Yeah well no though whatever the new Monado is. Yeah. But that specific shade of red with that tiny weird little fat cross in it is called a Zohar. Okay. That's a that's a Xenogir's saga thing. Okay. That's not Xenoblade. Well maybe it's at the end of Xenoblade but that's a thing that shows up and has a lot of plot elements associated with it. That's cool. Nice. So hopefully that's not just

a visual call. It's probably just a visual call back because it's super dope looking and that sword looks fantastic but don't get your hopes up. It's likely maybe it's the Zohar you know maybe it's the big Zohar. You want the Xenoblade Gears story to continue even though you didn't care for the Xenosaga. Xenosaga is quite bad. And that's a direct sequel is it not? No. Okay. Let me let me explain a couple things to you because this is very confusing. It'll be fast. Take it away. Xenogir's comes out and it's very much like Star Wars in that you get to the very end of the game and it says episode five Xenogir's and then if you go into the Perfect Works you go into the Perfect Works book you discover that there's flashbacks to different eras in Xenogir's

like oh here's what the modern era looked like here's what the space era looked like these were supposed to be episodes one two three four and then there's a sixth one which is the complete end of that series okay and then Monolith Soft or everyone that works in Monolith Soft Quit Square and what made Xenosaga so they didn't own anything they retained right so everything in Xenosaga it's like it's not Fey and Ellie reincarnated it just happens to look exactly like them so it's it's Chrono Cross it's this really weird off-brand version of that oh man okay it's Demon Souls they go in very weird different places and it's just generally unsatisfying but Xenosaga is episodes one two and three and it's supposed to be like it's not it's not the same but it's

implied right and then Xenoblade is again its own completely different thing that is 100 different but some of the design elements some of the way the robots look stuff like that and it's like all all crazy super fans like me is like I would really like to see a game that takes place in like the Zeba Wim era of the Xenogir story that's a cool place that was not fully explored but because of the way that the the rights are it's weird it's super weird it's it's always sad when like the problem with this is that the sequel legally can't acknowledge the original because then it's like it's not that we're doing a cool new thing and then maybe you can get a nod it's like no we can never actually there is uh there are some gonzo I can't believe they got away with it

shit in Xenosaga where there is a character named Xion Uzuki who is the primary hero of the Xenosaga games right not cosmos it's Xion she's the redhead with glasses I know she's in yeah she's in uh yeah so her brother his name is Jin Uzuki right and he wears all green has long black hair has glasses yep and uses a sword he is identical looking to the doctor sight and Uzuki from Xenogir okay they're literally exactly the same character but his first name is different okay so he's a different person does uh is there a version of Momo Chen there whatever like the girl with the big fist no okay because in um in them I know them as a unit because in Namco X Capcom you have cosmos and then you have uh Xion and Momo and Momo's like

the girl with the big fist that does big punchy things little magical girl with the big fist yeah that's the one she's terrible well that's a whole race of tiny that's yeah that's that's that's a shame man I didn't realize that it was a legal thing so it's so confusing now with chronocross they had that direct like we're throwing the baby in there yeah right at the end uh to kind of like throw in the baby to kind of make a direct link but I don't think they're allowed to go any further than that yeah and of course you know demons to dark we can put some weapons in and there's some implication but that's about as far as we can go yeah it's one of those and that makes it really frustrating and the fact that Xenosaga's story and game like some of them are like bad also

doesn't help so you have like good game Xenosaga not good games they're not good the first the game makes no sense at all like it's one of those jrpg so you get to the end you're like that didn't make any sense but wasn't and isn't that the best one Xenosaga one yeah no apparently three is the best one okay two is the worst one okay I didn't even finish two so ass so shit um oh also those games changed art styles completely from one to three it used to be very very anime and then it became realistic in the third one it's fucking weird it seems like a franchise that only works if you like it's not even a real franchise but but what I mean is it seems like a game series that works providing that you really like cosmos but you have it seems it seems like the prerequisite

to getting into it is probably like in cosmos but I don't know I have no idea I've never played them I'm just taking guesses based on the cameos I've seen in the games I played on the big board of things Pat is wrong about clearly of course you know Saga is a terrible series of course you know it goes on the board of things Pat's wrong about um we're gonna need a bigger board oh boy uh we're also gonna get dribbling down that board unspecified games but franchises we know that uh we're getting a new blaze blue and we're getting a new frontier days founding pioneers so arcsis is working on the switch is basically what they what they're saying okay that's arcsis right yes not axis not axis arcsis that's the worst hey man I'm down with fighting games period being

there because right now we have one so this is going to be two um is that is that the end of the switch thing now for for new games that have been announced there's the tales of game and there's a taiko game and that's it yeah the launch lineup is pretty sparse it's low so there's breath of the wild and one to switch those are your heavy hitters on launch day and uh there's a couple others do you guess let let me because we were you were going over that list and um yeah I remember like it's like six games on day one here and when uh when we talked about it I think right after the kid we stopped the stream uh um uh when we did the thing you described it as it's the nintendo 64 possibly because I want I want to verify this but I believe

if I'm not mistaken that like the nintendo 64's launch was pilot wings and super mario 64 I believe that was actually it and that was all that existed now for nintendo in a matter of weeks new things came out but on day one I think it was just for nintendo that is the case like their first party offering is a zelda and once you switch but I believe the remainder of all games are independent like digital games that may have already come out on other systems with the exception of snipper clips um okay let me let me pull up a list here because I believe it's like six games total yeah okay the nintendo 64 was absolutely just pilot wings in that's crazy yeah that's not for me launch for the us is breath of the wild one two switch just danced skylanders and bomber men

that's bad it's not a lot um it's a bit odd considering like you know the big worry about when vr was coming out and it's like hey are there gonna be enough vr games and then sony was like oh fuck you where's your time here's a shit time you know and uh then you're like oh but normal consoles always have like big healthy launches because they have to and it's like apparently not this time around so we've gone in the in the span of this podcast we've gone through a couple nintendo things and um one of the things that happened when the we you came out that I always railed against really hard was that the we's lineup died in the last two years of its life prior to the we you coming out right I think they were like me maybe one or two nintendo games that came out

right mm-hmm and then the we you came out with almost nothing right it came out with Mario came out with a few games but it wasn't the big boom you expected from nintendo right and so the we use life has died off at now and there's been very very very few games coming out of nintendo over the past little while and again the assumption was and same thing with 3ds as well the assumption is like well they're spending all their development resources on making a bunch of games for the switch yeah right yep and again the answer to that is no not really there's zelda and once you switch and mario mario whatever for for this year and mario kart sport right but that seems to be it for the year and all I can think like no smash bros and that import for the whole year

uh really it's it's weird it's funny because melee hd on that list would have like increased the weight of it so drastically it would have like carried it a little bit but um I yeah third party support is bad uh I mean and the thing with it it's weird because like healthy launches are important because people see a big selection and they go oh boy everyone's here this is the place to be I better get in here and then they stand with their switch or whatever their console is and then developers go oh look everyone's here and then you get this like repeating um you know uh economy if you would of like people come because there's games and games show up because there's people um but even upi soft kings of will support fucking anything with a bunch of

shit of only are only putting out just dance but here's the thing is and rayman later but how many games of okay how many games on the announced list are you actually like going to purchase to play for yourself zelda mario uh on the of the entire list of games announced you're not going to play an smt project you're not gonna play those that those games don't even have titles they do not count okay you mean of things we've seen footage of things that are real things we've seen footage of come out okay not even splatoon yeah yeah maybe some platoon are you gonna buy ultra oh yeah i guess i have to yeah but all that actually matters that i'm buying the system for is mario and zelda and now we're back to the same thing we have with every nintendo console which is what are you buying

it for mario and uh so but what i was where i was kind of going with that is that like i think you'd pretty much yeah you're gonna end up with that same sort of uh initial library you had for your we or for your we you but i'll probably buy a sick so i can play it on the go but the difference this time around hopefully will be the fact that since it's the 3ds and proper console teams now all focusing on one thing that there's going to be a faster release of games that continues and that you don't get that slowdown so if there's this initial sort of again like sparse nintendo launch purchase list at the very least more people focusing on the console should mean faster releases every month first party and while while i have been saying that for a while and you

should be it's the strength of the of the platform you should be right because it's nintendo somehow i feel like those that thing is going to have absurd droughts i i just like if i if you think about the way the 3ds was going woolly i know it but the god damn the god damn nintendo always figures out a way to not put out games always somehow and this launch lineup and and projected lineup it's really sparse there's gonna be really smart they didn't even announce monster her for fuck's sake well look obviously there's gonna be lag to account for learning how to develop on a new console obviously but i think that i'm i'm gonna i mean we'll see we'll find out how wrong we are a year from now but i feel like a year after launch you know what game i would really

like on the switch like genuinely love on the switch yeah i would like ff 14 on the switch okay i would like to be able to play that via wi-fi uh-huh in a in a in whatever location i choose that would that would have a lot of value and how are you planning to chat with your friends who gives a shit you don't need to chat did you hear about that yeah i i heard hey there's this app you use on your phone to talk to people on nintendo platforms it's called discord oh right okay so well whatever this is the most ass backwards thing by far it really seems that way but at the same time i get it because of reggie's explanation of it and let me all right let's start from the beginning okay go ahead all right so nintendo is going to eventually be rolling out a paid version of its

online service this will include things such as voice chat between you and your friends on your friends list and this will be primarily accomplished as i understood it via a paid app that you used your smartphone for to talk to your friends yes online instead of say a wee like the way the wee you did it with there was an internal microphone in the we that you talked and the main reason uh behind this uh according to reggie is because um when you are on the go they would rather you have like your phone with you as like something that makes more sense to chat through as opposed to like basically at home it like you can using the console or the controller whatever makes sense because it's what you're doing and you're focused in front of your tv but

like while you're playing it portably and out and out and about uh that becomes more cumbersome and like it makes more sense to like yeah no that's horseshit just use discord instead i guess there's nothing to stop you there's no reason why you wouldn't just use discord it'll very likely be a higher quality call as well here's the problem or features here's the problem how are you gonna hear the game by having your phone next to you with the sound coming out but so you put one headphone in the game does the fucking switch have speakers so you oh so you just like you straight up cut off one or the other how do you get game feed plus discussion feed together through your ears by having the speakers

on both devices going okay if you have headphones in no you don't have headphones in so you're talking out loud on your discord on your on your phone yeah and you're playing the game with the noise of the game on your phone as well yeah that seems really cumbersome what's the difference well if you're in public and you're and you're trying to play with the headset and not make noise don't fucking talk and woolly if you're gonna talk the fact that you're in public makes you an asshole anyway that you're on a plane going oh yeah get him uh i'm a fuck yeah fairer i i'm making noise yourself i i get that part of it but i'm trying to imagine that if you're doing a game like if you're just if you're playing and you're not playing loudly you're trying to play with people

and whatnot but you want to occasionally have to say something or whatever you can do that in a minimal way right and like it's an app through your phone anyway how is that gonna how and not to mention like you have to then you have to worry about the sensitivity of the volume of the game coming through while your voice doesn't push to talk no but no but seriously how would the phone app work i'm assuming and i'm not sure i'm not 100 because it sounds like their solution is exactly what i'm talking about just use their thing instead of discord i'm wondering if their solution is going to actually have some sort of uh like stream of the audio that you know mixes with your no it's it's literally they're literally gonna make a nintendo discord that you pay for

and it's gonna suck compared to discord if the whole plan is just to be like an online chatting service for nintendo but like there's no actual way to to hear the game and your conversation at the same time well no you just use speakers for both obviously on the go i know but i i think that that's suboptimal for various you know what i think is suboptimal not just having a fucking microphone to the thing so i can plug my headphones in and just use it that's bafflingly fucking stupid i suppose so that is absolutely ass backwards but that nintendo always finds a way but that's why i'm assuming that this paid app is going to be a bit more than a discord why why because it just it just seems why would you assume it because it seems like kind of nutty that like

there would be no solution you know what you're right hearing the game your audio with headphones it is very weird that nintendo would make a weird decision in regards to online interfaces or chats that's weird you know the reason behind this is kids don't have smartphones therefore they can't get fucked with bipedos that's what it is that's the this is another where is the safety level with well the parents have to give their kids smartphones but they can give them switches by themselves so the kids are safe from the creepies it's another system fucking bullshit thing that they fucked up because they need to keep the kids safe you know what i want good features i wonder unsafe children that i wonder

nicely done uh i i hope i hope you said something at all in that so it's not a clean rip oh that was clean um that was clean alongside all your your other clean clips about isaac and little boys so what the fuck was that i don't remember tiny child big dick for the tiny child yeah no no no it wasn't big dick for the china china china china child it was it was it was tiny tiny child big dick or something like that because isaac small but he has a fuck it you can't explain it i was playing the game yep there you go i'm playing a game all right look uh we'll see because right now we're tiled and yeah now we're out of here now we're just playing stupid speculation and and we have no idea what they're gonna do i i foresee nintendo fucking it up on the online

certainly but i just i i can't think it would be so dumb as to not include a way to listen to the game well the other thing is that like people already use you know like discord for their nintendo online like that like people it's simpler it's simpler for sure in my discord i already we have a chat room that is literally the hunting chat for are you playing monster hunter going there right and when you're playing at home right on your tv or whatever the fuck that's how it's gonna work it's again like now that we're out of the era of friend codes and so who says we're not well look at the very least says woolly because i bet this fucking thing's gonna friend codes at the no no no you have an account system yeah right and the account system is tied to your friend

code you can give your friends your name your friend code your name you can give your friends your name you can do it right now pat pat you can do it right now you can give your friends your name and all he needs is your name and then you accept your request saying that my name is my friend code just fucking it's it's already fine it's already fine all right um i don't want my name to be my friend i'm not friend codes are pretty much done they're pretty much done i think they figured it out you see the photos of uh the switch sitting next to the we you game pad yeah that's a size yeah actually i have and i have two thoughts on that or three thoughts one is smaller than i thought but good uh the switch looks slick it looks genuinely slick it looks like

a good like cool piece of tech and boy does the we game pad look like a fisher price piece of shit next to it neck it's because it's just it's got those like it doesn't have those sleek it's got a rounded plastic bagel big old fisher price don't break me really does look like a fisher price it looks bad yeah um and now that we have something else to compare it to that's pretty much the same thing like dimensions wise like whoa we're gonna have to do we're gonna have to see the screen and see like how the screen compared looks good uh the impressions are coming out that the 720p screen looks very good which is great uh god i don't know that the term for the difference between um you know how like we we talk about how like a vita screen looks or like a 3ds screen

looks yeah that's uh that's uh olad versus lcd sorry olad that's what it was it's an lcd screen it's absolutely gonna be okay all right all right that thing would cost 600 dollars all that screen just based on this this is the size okay okay um uh but it's a very good looking lcd screen according to people that saw it in new york and japan yeah and then i'm seeing all those palm comparisons as well where it's like it's sitting here's a uh someone took a picture of it like right next to their um their uh gameboy advanced micro and i believe that the it's pretty much the exact size if not a little bit larger than that which is terrible news for me because that is exactly way too small way too small for me exactly yeah uh what is cool though is that if

you pop the joycons off the tablet portion of it is pretty much the identical size as a 3ds excel meaning if you pop the joycons off and put them in your left pocket and you you put that thing with a screen protector on in your right pocket people can totally put them in their jacket pockets you can totally carry that thing around like in your clothes okay yeah you'll need two pockets you'll have to you'll have to separate the two but it is totally feasible but here's where if you can fit a 3ds excel in your pants right now but here's where that falls apart though uh when you put on that nice shiny case that's meant to hold all three yeah and you pull the controllers off then the case doesn't work anymore yep you're right do you need to carry two cases one

for the screen by itself and then you switch to that on the this is not gonna work it's not gonna work man i don't know stank new future of new cases okay uh oh oh okay hold on actually breaking news no clarification that um the uh that uh max and simmons actually thought they were on next week so this was just a communication breakdown and it's totally the west coast is so far behind totally not they thought it was next week so all good next week it's gonna be banging then because we have a guest for next week as well don't we or is that the week after no we did have okay we'll figure it out we'll have to figure it out but uh that's that's totally fine i guess uh maybe i just didn't make it clear enough i wonder what happened i wonder if people were like hey max

you fucked up possibly but uh man yeah they they both thought it was supposed to be next sorry guys uh no worries we'll figure that out no problem um west coast made you do it so uh yeah i guess that's that's our switch roundup um i i uh i bought four cool uh i i went out and said i'm gonna do this and i got one for myself i got one for my pal i got one for uh the misses and i got one that was supposed to be for work right and then i was like no wait that's a fucking stupid thing we just need a new doc right yeah and then i'm like oh woolly just you take that last one and we'll just bring it whoever the fuck is recording a switch game just bring in the thing and slap it into the dock and so uh matt i saw matt got his pre-order from best buy uh and mike

zero dude uh got a pre-order and if he doesn't follow through he will sell it to me so i will be able to hand that off to somebody else yeah and by hand that off and got these four people i mean reserve them it i'm not going out there and spending thousands of dollars on you fucks well or well sure um yeah i think that that work like no because there was one guy that was pissy at me was like who look at me i'm pat i have fifteen hundred dollars to spend like no i have fifty dollars each to spend to help my fat my friends out because i'm a crazy asshole because i'll go to the store early um by the way is there a way to get your shit off of that when you if when you when the time comes can you uh shit off of what like uh sd cards or uh it supports micro sd

okay up to two terabytes which doesn't exist but okay currently the highest sd card that exists is 512 and that's coming out in july what's what's the what what what memories are besides that 32 gig uh internal flash okay all right and that's so they have talked that they may allow external hard drives for the dock but that is not going to be available at launch but you can get software and saves on an sd card yes great suppose well maybe just the expansion plan is for micro sd that's how it's going to happen but even though i'm going all digital i have a i have a feeling that i'm going to be buying some game cards depending on the file sizes of certain games cool yeah uh if if what what is the if two terabyte doesn't exist and what's the largest

that we can do you can buy a 512 uh in july okay for like a thousand dollars because the absolute worst would be like you know something like amazing coming out and it's like yeah this just doesn't support the current the current largest average that i found was 128 gig micro sd cards that for about 50 to 60 bucks that seems to be like that the the current spot that micro sd is at so pick up one of those slamming him it's not perfect it's definitely not the best i would have preferred more internal memory or something but it's not the vita it's because you can use god damn regular sd cards yeah it'll have to do um i'm i've never found myself deleting as often as when i was using my vita tv oh dude it's crazy it was a constant rotation it was pretty much

like three games at a time and it was really one big game and two small ones persona fuck you get out right yeah that's it uh okay so there was some other stuff that uh went down this week dude what uh stuff opened and stuff closed what what opened what closed uh we had the announcement of sweary's new studio white owls white owls good god damn name yeah that's pretty cool um i it's it's funny because like the the the way the news is kind of announcing this like after a break from games for three months sweary comes back after three months absence from video games he comes back with new studio white owls um that promo picture of him with the the bowler hat and the fucking mustache mustache yeah what a fucking chode i love him well it's like you'll think about

think about the way kojima announced ludens and that amazing high tech future world and this motherfucker being like nah we're doing mustaches now fuck you i'm a monk i have a curly mustache so yes uh according to sweary he says um white owls is um it's a name that has deep meaning in and he describes how in ancient greece owls were sages of the forest and servants of minerva the goddess of wisdom and he goes on to talk about the meaning of white owls and such and it's like it's dude it's we get it's it's cool it's a it's cool man name no worries um i'm eager to see him return to game development yes absolutely because the question is like what can he take anything with him or just you know what i mean

like what belongs to who well i'm sure considering how he got away with making that amazing twin peaks game despite never seeing twin peaks yeah i'm sure he'll manage somehow but like deadly premonition and d4 belong to xsi soon sure okay so i'll leave that then he would have to just be making what about killer vision do they own killer vision what's killer vision think about it deadly oh that's just killer vision that was really really bad was it or was it the best joke you've ever heard right the last story and and yeah last story still cracks me the yeah yeah blatant oh anyway that's cool but for every birth there must be a death and so with the announcement with the announcement of the opening of white owl studios we uh

announce the death of gorilla cambridge oh really yeah um it sucks for them it does um so sony is shutting them down uh they're the guys that made rigs uh and that was a good game yep and i also made that kill zone game on the psb i believe not the psb the um mercenary kill zone mercenary um yeah and they also worked on medieval and so on oh wait now i'm confused at the bottom of this thing it says gorilla cambridge is not gorilla game not gorilla games who made horizon zero don't on the kills on franchise yeah they made kills on mercenary but girl uh girl it's really games made medieval yes gorilla games is horizon zero don that's not that's not this company cambridge yeah so well luckily cambridge is a place that has lots of smart people at because

of the university so maybe they'll have work you feel good about that yep that's good really good feel good that you're feeling good i feel i feel great that i'm feeling great and i feel great that you feel great that i feel great you know who doesn't feel great who doesn't feel great eddy camea not much here but like i was just waiting to hear what he'd have to say about the whole thing there's a really good quote coming out of his twitter about this and it's take a meant take a month off for mental health me no way yeah sounds like more went on behind the scenes on this than we were led to believe it's well i mean that's the thing is like the way he's like that's like it's missing the slash s at the end of that almost but uh yeah he's bummed out the

scalebounds fucking dead and he just says i'll work extra hard to not have to let you down like this again well luckily you'll never let me down camilla oh i broke my phone case you've already let yourself down what happened broke my phone because you put it where the chips were no did you try to eat it by mistake because it was in the food zone on the table the food zone is that what you call it the place in front of you where you assume your food is going to be the jack's area that's the food zone oh boy yeah oh how many food zones at the house the kitchen counter is a good food zone the kitchen table the pillow the floor get out dude the toilet seats come on that's dirty why would you eat off a toilet that's dirty i but you take

so many showers what's the problem pat yeah but i don't shower the toilet the the toilet's where your poop goes and yeah i then you went in you're so clean that you'd have no problem eating off of it no you're not listening you're you're twisting my words so no i'm not no i'm not you have your food zones yeah food zone all right um i could i could sit here and explain the system to you like all day i really don't then don't engage with my system then don't challenge my engagement take it shut up take it we're gonna we're gonna get there eat this bread erin so here's something that you're gonna enjoy are you ready for the first set sense game experience since earthbound that is going to use your sense of smell there's a re7 4d vr candle so i should

point out that scented candles make me yeah so sick there's a very specific reason why i brought this up uh i i sent certain scents that are commonly used in perfume make me so sick that i like get horrific migraines and vomit so when i saw this i was like great a product specifically designed to kill me what's that smell it's my dad it's your rotting corpse as the candle burns and you die with your vr helmet on the way you always know person in society that i despise more than the cab driver or the lady on the bus or the guy in the elevator who when they left the house they're like i gotta smell good and decided to douse themselves with perfume or cologne and create a smell radius you know what i'm talking about i know what you're talking about it's the

radius of smell two feet around them it's it's pungent it's the fake yeah yeah yeah it's the cologne kaioken because most people when they walk by that person go whoa buddy too much on the axe if i walk by that person my day is ruined right my day is ruined i will get a migraine that is so bad i have to go home and actually stay in the shower for like two hours just running hot water on my temple unfortunately for the rest of us you people are garbage for the rest of us normal human beings it's just a whoa buddy too much on the axe and we're fine and it's like i ever to you know down to the eating center i know uh when you go to the best buy oh yeah metro oh that's not where i thought this was going i thought now you know where it's going where did

you think no i thought you were going to talk about down by there when you have to walk through the bay so when you walk through the bay to get to the future shop yeah okay yes exactly then and they have those nice oh yeah oh yeah yeah yeah just walk right through it standing there with their little spritzers right hello would you like a fragrance you know so what you're saying is when you approach no what i'm saying is that it didn't happen at the bay but that's the most common place but it did happen at the sears in cuff the sears does it as well one of them just walked up to me yeah and just said hey sir would you like this so what you're saying is i i when you walk up to the mall doors there's a fog gate that you have to pass through i and then the zone activates

and as you aggro each of these ladies they start spraying their poison at you woolly have you ever had this situation in which you are so angry in hope you brought enough moss in which you are so angry in public that underneath that anger there's a feeling of fear and the feeling is someone is going to call the police based on your actions like i'm being so angry right now i've never had that the police are being called i've never had everything in my power to not like just attack well because that's what that is if you walk up to me and spray shit in my face that's like punching me in the head for hours well maybe you shouldn't aggro the ladies maybe they always put them at the fucking entrance the fucking pharma pre across from the movie theater you have to walk

through the goddamn perfume aisle to get to the candy yeah you gotta kite them you gotta kite them out and then make your way around hold my breath when i go in that drugstore oh man is it is it not could you not put it like a couple feet oh no it's some people walk in and they smell the wondrous smells and they think ooh i want to spritz myself up with that poison it's bullshit sorry the world is out to kill you pat it you know wait but here's the thing no here's here's and here's where i calm down i bitched to my dad about this and he was that's rough mm-hmm and i go you allergic to anything dad he goes yeah i'm like what are you allergic to penicillin yeah and then and then what happens and i go what happened how'd you find that out oh i had pneumonia yeah and they

gave me a shot of penicillin yeah and i almost died and then what and then i got better yeah yeah but i have yes take that you know bullshit off brand and then you shut the fuck up and then i was like okay a migraine is not so bad all right because hey i'm not allergic to to opiates i'm not allergic to medicine i'm not allergic to food i'm allergic to peanuts i'm not allergic to water or metal or you know we have that friend that's allergic to metal yes because but here's what i've been like at a certain point like if you're a bubble boy and you're stuck in a bubble yeah are you cursing the outside world for its existence or are you cursing your own shitty shitty body i'm cursing because i think you're kiting the line in between there is a line there

and you know it is it's like if i walk into somebody's house and they have a glade plug in right yeah my life is ruined but i get that they want to keep their house nice and it smells nice and then that's fine right yeah i'm talking about the people who create the who turn themselves into bonds fine right fine because that's not just shitty for me everyone knows that those people smell like shit yes everybody everybody here season here and when you walk into a bathroom in a public space they're going to be spraying that shit into the bathroom yeah there's going to be a febreeze in someone's house yeah it's a big reason it's not that bad okay but i'm just saying at a certain point you got to turn it inside and go know my genes are shit well i already and i'm built

on terrible terrible foundation that fucking genetic uh ginger thing where i'm resistant to opiates in which painkillers don't work yeah okay so that's fun that's super fun hey hey pat we shot you with 18 needles of uh what's the what's the dentist shit called novocaine novocaine shot you with 18 we're gonna leave for about half an hour so that kicks in they come back in a half an hour they touch the drill to my tooth you feel that ow yeah i feel that give me 20 more it it could have been penicillin it could have been penicillin it could have been penicillin could have been peanuts penis is tough peanuts is rough penis is tough um there's a good luci k bit about that yeah about how maybe we could just solve that problem in like two seconds or it it there's a lot of

worst things it could be it could be your own damn skin yeah that's a that's that's one that's one that we know somebody that has to deal with and that one's rough it could be piss you know allergic to piss your own piss yeah then what then um you just i just have to keep it in jars i guess like low tier god um i heard about some some some like yeah yeah yeah he's got the bbc gene and he pisses in jars apparently um well sorry for that aside yeah uh so before we get into some emails we have an announcement oh yes we do have an announcement we have an announcement unfortunately the subject of our announcement uh texted me earlier says he could not be here so i have to do it without him yes so uh in in the current current era of uh currently matt's

on break and liam unfortunately left the channel uh willy and i have been working quite hard to keep videos up we've also discovered and matt agrees with this as well that we are all very lazy and uh we don't like doing work do you like doing work willy actually i i i do enjoy uh way to just throw me right under the fucking i keep myself pretty busy what an asshole but i am lazy okay thank you thank you thank you so uh in if you have been watching our videos this week you will have noticed that the production quality on those videos has taken a spike upwards uh i'm thinking particularly of uh parasite eeve so one which that wonderful terry cruz meme image was inserted and the excellent end of uh save decay in which uh the outro was modified borders with

episode numbers on them uh wow i didn't even notice that one uh basically if you guys remember fighter pedia or uh what else did he appear in uh fucking uh guide to our kade sticks the podcast blowing your ass yeah well he didn't blow my ass out it blew his own asshole out because lancers are shit hey man he's fucking good yeah whatever uh billy uh friend a longtime friend of uh primarily woolly's like he lives with you but uh we've known forever has been brought on to edit our videos yeah um so if you remember two weeks ago i asked the podcast listeners to go hey if any of the videos this week come out super fucked up that's not my fault please don't yell at me uh that's because we gave a couple of them the billy to make sure like he could do it properly yep so

uh billy is going to be helping us out with the editing and he's totally um doing a kick-ass job of it he's doing a better job than we do and while he you know i mean he spends more time on yeah which time that i don't have i can now use that time to do all sorts of things like hide candy in my home eat chips off the floor and stream woolly woolly woolly woolly woolly the floor is disgusting what are you talking about what are you talking about the table's fine the chair is fine even so yeah but the but the but the but the floor that's not good your feet go there uh so billy's gonna be if your feet go on to the table that's fine gonna be um helping us but yeah no so we'll be able to do uh other stuff in addition uh including nothing or or other things that we

want to do uh yeah so uh definitely other things i'm really really glad to be able to bring billy on board because i hate editing so god damn much i hate it's it's the worst part of this job by far i hate it i hate that willy how often does this happen you're about to go to bed and it's 4 30 a m and you go i should probably check the schedule before i off my video is the one that's supposed to be up for 3 p.m tomorrow it it hasn't happened in a while but it has happened and and then you're like well so i'm gonna blow this early morning yeah it sucks yeah but there's stuff that is that is that is enjoyable but ultimately so if you see any funny editing gags uh in the video in videos in the future or you particularly like uh episode borders uh or preview pictures or the like give a

big thumbs up to billy just doing a good job and uh with that hopefully ends our reign of shitty editing terror no no well that won't fix the sound issues because the sound issues are on the recording end you're not wrong but i got one of these babies and this is backing up everything we do from now on so quite frankly um i'm not too worried should not be a concern anymore losing video is always a possibility losing video is always a possibility and accidentally recording through the wrong microphone will always be a threat maybe like oh the there's no backup for that besides setting up a fucking camcorder and and and doing it no mercy style so uh yay billy no he's he's been doing a great job i love him and yeah and he can farm our gold in the meantime i come on i've been holding

off on that i've been holding off on that joke i have explicitly uh on the gold farming joke yep yep it's fine i could go for some gold he's already maxed out i can go i can go for some gold man he's got time i need it should i talk to him about like trading like because we're paying him right he's not going to gold farm he's not going to go for gold farming rates in 14 or 10 i would tell you about that guy that would let work let he worked that kid that went to school and would hang out at the arcades that i went to every day and just take money for people to level up their characters and gauntlet legends for 20 bucks he'd come in and max you out on your character give with a name and password and that's and that was his hustle that's a decent and that was his fucking

hustle for 20 bucks how long does it take uh i don't know but because that's he did it for a while that's the question if it takes four hours and clearly he was good enough at the game that he didn't have to spend that many quarters yeah so like 15 bucks it's a profit for a couple for two hours work it was kind of nuts that's all right yeah and then the arcade machine gets taken away and then there's the end of that and your money for that matter but whatever um i respected it it was loyal let's take some loyal emails from some loyal listeners shall we oh also uh an addendum to uh does billy have twitter yeah i'm sure he has twitter right uh i don't think so okay well we gotta we gotta put him out there so that when a video fucks up people can just skip right

past us to throwing him right i let it let it be at his own pace billy billy can put himself out there as much as he would like to um but uh okay so what i'm so if a video fucks up since uh their roommates just go out message at woolly wools right twitter you gotta yell with me uh bike in town so that i can i can yell down the hall yeah and uh find out what's going on yeah great perfect middleman it's a good system that doesn't involve you in any way shape or form well that's the best systems at all right if pat's not in the system then it's probably gonna work can we do that for the life system oh now man too many complex variables in that life system let's take some questions hey questions and emails and general statements if you want to send

those in that's super best friendcast at gmail.com that's super best friendcast at gmail.com i would like to hear how the chewing fuckface show is doing uh and how the west coast sucks tell me how the west coast sucks tell me stories about how the west coast is shit we'll read them next week when max assembly dude i'm totally willing to call that my bad um i don't care no that's fine that's your pad but the west coast though now that we have proper uh proper advanced time now we can get stories about how this one guy went to a gas station on the west coast and they didn't wash his car danie west coast is washington state on the west coast washington dc no state state i'm talking about the one that's underneath uh bc is i is on the west because when i hear west coast all i think

about is like la you know seattle's west coast okay yeah there's there's stuff over there um you know surfers and shit surfers out in seattle surfers out in seattle oh okay uh we got one coming in from armando hey armando what up he says super best podcasters i recently visited a friend's house to play video games nothing really exciting happened until he exited the game instead of quitting the game and reaching the main menu he just exits to the cross menu bar of his ps4 and closes the application kind of like hitting pause on pc or exit to desktop is this this is a polarizing thing i think do you go through the process of saving and exiting the to the main menu every time or do you just quit in the middle of the game uh depends on the game

bloodborne really doesn't like it when you do that neither is dark souls 3 they hate it they want you to go back to the main menu they hate it like they there's a message that pops up and says you fucked up don't do that everything else as long as i'm confident that the autosave went forward i usually just don't i usually don't even exit out i usually just kick it in arrest mode yeah uh i think i do both i i do a manual save uh if possible and then just go back into rest because i don't like loading i don't like waiting on the loads and a lot of the games i've been playing recently have fat loads so i want to trim that so you're you're not the you're not a fan of fat loads no no no no okay i'm a fan of no loads no loads zero loads you want

you want a loadless experience i want nothing no loads no loads nowhere anywhere around you nothing all right not even the remote idea of alone man i don't even talk about loads and this and this get it away from me get it away get it all away you got one coming in from casbot hey tree fuckface and insert special guest name here um this week it's a bag of doritos and a coffee cup pay that's our guests hey look you know if you put the coffee cup in the doritos we could make it like a character hold on you you read that question i'll workshop this you work will you work it in there work it in there um hey a lot of talk this week going on about the stunning rivalea tin that the switches online voice chat has gone through the mobile app yeah

he's actually just going like how the fuck is it gonna work and the answer is we don't know this uh well welcome to the new podcast character this is tim dory because it's tim hortons and doritos i see it yeah you can see it so is there coffee in there no it's okay good come on well there was some cheeto dust now now you're making the place messy there's literally nothing it's fine okay i smacked it out of his hands it was clean to eat off this so check it out uh the answer is we don't know why nintendo's doing that casbot and we don't know how it's gonna work i wish we had a answers for you but unfortunately we don't um let's take one i live in terror of that bit being uh done at the

wrong time i live in like horror of that bit being done when someone thinks that the shit is empty oh but it's totally full the funniest and best things ever with like a lot of the comedians i like to listen to is if you come up and you're eating a big slice of pizza and they just smack it on the floor or like if you show up and you've got like a nice bagel in your pocket and he just grabs you and punches the bagel in your pocket and mushes it and you're like why would you do that to my it's the fucking best i love it i absolutely live for that shit fuck you're stupid punch in a bagel in your pocket shouldn't have eaten it around me fuck you don't eat around me no it's just it's no it's just if you show up and you're looking

like you're enjoying something it's your friend's duty to ruin that shit look louise having a wonderful day at the park with his kids just punch that kid run away uh they're super best glass breakers are there any game series out there that have constantly disappointed you but you play it anyway because it's the only game that fits a particular niche from durkert's i think state of decay actually fulfills that role pretty exactly that game is jank and busted but when i want to play that that's pretty much the only game that scratches that itch it's the only one i'm not going to play daisy but it's daisy takes broken to the nth degree um that's a tough one i think it's it's you know i like swinging so buy on a commando

2009 it's gonna be my you know yeah my swing place i like third person swinging i should say um because you don't want it to be the first or second person you want to be a third person okay now you're just trying now yeah too hard yeah stop pushing the math fucking thing i'm not pushing it it's rolling down hill on its own i let it go really hard i let it go immediately it wasn't hard earlier today and i never have to mention it again now you're pushing it i'm pushing the math fucking i had i i took a piece of snow and i went whoop down the hill and i walked away i think you only said it like three times i i think it was twice i think it was twice no no it it was three because i responded to you said it and then you said it again and i'm like and

they're like can we not do this and i guess you like getting fucked in the mouth and yeah yeah responses don't count that's not that's not even me oh um this is good revenge this is good twin wants to know um dear dreadlocks in the ginger um that's an alternative radio name that's all right i watched listen to you guys since i started and i must say i never would have learned so much about video games if it weren't for you all thanks for opening my mind thank you kindly that's very past slapping in a game and pressing buttons to enjoying the magic since trico isn't hesitant to eat food he's reorienting his model also side note fuck you for ruining the magic no problem that's over here um basically he wants to know what we said that the we said that region locking

is over and he wants to know what that means for the industry oh it means that it's it's better for consumers definitely that like there's a bunch of it's a bunch of niche games that always came out and i fighting games in particular was always infuriating because like guess what you can get by in a japanese fighting game like tell i remember i had the japanese copy of tech in three on playstation one do you know why because who gives a shit what it says in english right i can figure out what verses says of course um and it always sucked because there were games that would just not come out ever like they're never gonna come out hook tonal ken the fighting game will never be translated and that's a okay yeah because you don't need it so you can get weird licensed niche

stuff stuff that's not popular in your region um if for example uh the yakuza series wasn't enjoying the the resurgence that it is right now in the west like yakuza zero comes out tomorrow buy that seriously buy that buy yakuza zero tomorrow buy it it needs your support buy it um i would have been if it wasn't you could get one of those you know proper extensive translation guides and the those videos that had people translate the cut scenes and you could muddle through it you could do it i would have been way way more sad if this was a world where i couldn't play summer lesson at all yeah but we are now i can play the dlc you can get the bikini and you can go on a day trip it's totally about learning yep yep bikini and day trip yep about learning it's about teaching

japanese um no it really does just straight up open up everything for everyone it's exactly it's just a more power to the consumer and it's not like i'm not going to shit talk the concept of publishers because they're super necessary and they really help in cases where you know no one's going to do the legwork to bring something to a certain region all these guys are going to do it because they want this game to come out here that's awesome um but unfortunately sometimes that means fucking over people that would have just imported it anyway other times it means you know like europe has gotten fucked over by atlas for such a long time um it gets fucked a lot you know and i think that uh yeah australia australia australia gets the worst the read the the ratings boards are at

them on one side australia is probably the biggest winner yeah about this because there are an absolute shit ton of english language games yep that do not come out in that region for various reasons and now they can just get the north american or even like a uk version yep so if the place you live sucks and doesn't want you to get the good games you can just fight that with money oh that's the end of it with your dollary dues let's that's a great succinct breakdown of region locking if the place you live in sucks region locking is bad the end um nick is asking that's fucking weird alloy morph excuse me dare king and queen of castle super beast oh i thank you feels good to be king

ah when discussing game mechanics uh what is your favorite pet name for a system that or a thing item ability etc that doesn't originate in the same genre even something that more casual players of the game would have no hope of understanding for example after seeing what i did i will not always refer always refer to zaria's ultimate as gravity squeeze when my team inquires as to what the bloody hell i'm talking about all i can do is link them to the music video which is really fucking good um and watch the confusion multiply good luck holding on the fort alloy more can you reread that question basically so i think my answer will inform the question a little bit so my version of that is every time i see a dive kick i'm going to call it a red hot kick

usually okay that's uh that if it's a if it's that that's perfect like um a 45 degree angle i'll always call that a red hot kick unless it's clearly an inezuma kick or a rider kick i it's gonna be a red hot kick to me i have a i have a bunch of these i'm not gonna go into all of them but i plan mmo called ff 14 a lot of former wow players play that game and they they do not they will not call in game terms by their real names they will call them by their wow names oh cool what uh what kind of tune do you got you playing dude tunes what kind of what's crazy is mob exploded out to everything uh huh it and now everything is mobs dps everything agro is a thing ads are a thing these are terms i would never have encountered or used in my day but the one

that gets me it makes me so mad it's the system where you change what your armor looks like you go i want this armor to look like that other armor right yeah in 14 it's called glamour in wow it's called transmogrification okay okay and no people go hey where's the transmog vendor at like what are you even talking about you yeah that's there's there's a million there's people that call it uh tank busters that's the that's the primer more common one but other people call it tank crush and also there's a million terms that whatever mmo you learned this shit in that's what that's what you're gonna call it forever absolutely and it can be genuinely confusing at times yeah i help like um dp yeah dp a good one is that um ults ults yeah for it came

from obas and now it's everything i mean even i think it's official terminology but they call the overwatch characters heroes yes you know um yeah ha ha ha ha that's a thing you know what i mean like calling you're calling them champions for that matter i've seen a video or two early on where someone was referring to them as champions and i'm like oh my god really like it's just a character you select in this game there's also there's also we're doing this now and jungling oh boy oh boy yeah jungling through the creep jungling through the creep what the fuck are you talking about uh yeah yeah that's that's fun stuff um there's a bunch of shit like that that people and it almost always is i refuse to change what i call it even though the name is different

and the best one that i can think of right now actually is the ultrameter in street fighter 4 was never called the revenge meter in north america no never but everyone called the revenge meter because that's the first term that we heard um well focus attack stuck even though in japan order called saving strikes yeah because that sucks yeah but you know anyway and focus attack dash cancel is not the official in-game name for that move sure in five and in three people just say use your super yeah they don't really say use your critical art even though it sounds really cool yeah it's a critical art man yeah although no super art for the for the first versions of it yeah man there's a lot of them um let's take one from uh here's a good one uh kevin says what up um

remember when to hey two guys play remember when we motes first came out and they were like 40 bucks and an uncheck was an extra 15 yeah you seen all the 25 you saw the 25 dollar gamecube controllers on the shelf and shed a tear at how expensive they were yep a second set of joy cons is 80 dollars it's not probably a hundred and a pro controller is probably gonna be a hundred the the the the cost of the dock is the worst one what's the dock gonna cost the dock costs 90 usd despite the fact that all it is is the power in hgmi out that's all it is and it costs 90 usd so that's all it is it is a usb port and an hgmi port and there's one other port uh it doesn't even doesn't even have a built an ethernet port second set of joy cons uh dock and this will double the price pro controller is

double the price it's the cost of another console yes yeah yeah it's nuts god and like i want a set like i don't think any of us are gonna buy a second dock except for the one total one that me you and matt are gonna have for over there so that we can record but if there are people who genuinely like oh i go i do a lot of the office or i go at my my mom's house you know whatever that's a that's a hundred fucking dollars yeah for that that's a lot at the same time like i said it is impressive that they're coming in with the nintendo 300 dollar price point i wonder how they're doing that now well by fucking making it like that's probably at cost yeah at cost or just slightly under probably under but maybe a lot less than they usually do speaker and they're

making it up on accessories and attach those accessories do not do that that's you make you make money with attach rates now that's that's the only way you make money with consoles obviously um that's that's a given um questions this way yeah i got a couple good ones um we got one that's a big block of text uh sees it okay so this one's coming in from pyro jack and he says uh dare super spoopy glitches um one of the games that made an impression on me as a kid was mindscapes lego island i never had a console growing up in my pc repertoire was limited to educational games for my parents those admittedly awesome hasbro games that came out from general mill cereal boxes lego island was the first open world game i'd ever touched and one of my first experiences

with 3d environments this might explain why i overlooked a lot of the issues it had see my installation of the game was glitched to all hell the cursor was about a centimeter off from its hitbox so every object in the game popped in and out of existence and freezes and crashes were constant but since i was a dumb six year old i just kind of accepted it as the way the game was since i didn't have much of a frame of reference so i'll come later in an incident where uh that stopped me from playing for good there was a few missions in lego island where you have to play as a paramedic what's supposed to happen is you pull up to a pizzeria you find a choking lego character click on them at which points he coughs up a shark who coughs up a dog and so on that's

a pretty good kid uh only in my game none of the characters rendered so you freeze in place and the game loops the audio until you click on him and i was stuck there listening to a guy choking in the restaurant while the staff begged and pleaded for me to save him jeez which sounded way more frightening to a six year old than it was supposed to you that's messed have you ever encountered a glitch of some kind that genuinely scared you genuinely yeah um no clips were always really bad for me i never liked that because it has to do with some of my issues with um um motion sickness and stuff is also a part of that is like getting too close to a wall where like you wouldn't touch your eyeball to a surface so feeling like that's what's happening in the game is really really

for me the one that always would make me very anxious is uh depending what game i was playing the most classic kind of pc crash i can think of with old games and it's currently now too is that the video driver crashes and you hear a three seconds loop infinitely yeah and depending what game you're playing that noise can be like the worst noise in the world yeah i specifically remember playing like david defeat and it was like some german guy yelling through an explosion right and it was just really dire sounding and freaked me out uh and uh when i remember when i was younger if characters were to glitch out and their bodies were to deform horribly that would get me oh of course that one was like oh oh yeah yeah yeah the shit that we still have that in

like punisher and whatnot yeah tea posing is is always going to be a weird one like it's fun now but it's always really weird if you're like if the game has been perfect and then there's one moment of like tea posing that that fucking sucks um and it's it's kind of scary sometimes tea posing treco let's blend it when it flickers uh okay two more we're gonna take one from griffin he says dear garlington enummel's father uh oh uh you guys want to talk about his fountain i had some people on twitter asking me if i could talk more about his fountain i really don't but it has two it has two spouts on the fountain people forgot how to say woollington he likes uh he likes the left fountain uh drip more uh i'm curious most games movies books and so on have

an order that you would somehow read watch and play them in fountain uh but of course i know i know i saw the wait um for instance woolliest has his absurd venture shoe the souls born games going in batching order the bull yeah so weird um so what's the most batch in order you've seen someone go through a franchise as an example i have a friend who got into jojo and here's how he went through it he watched fan and blood and battle tendency and he skipped all the way over to stone ocean uh because of the waifus he thought stands and personas were the same thing uh uh then he played eyes of heaven story mode and after all that he watched diamond is unbreakable have you ever seen close to this level of absurdity i honestly your your trip through the soul series

is up there it's really up there yeah um i don't think i don't think uh i've ever seen anything like that but what comes to mind is machete order for star wars which i actually am okay with um that's where you watch uh two three four five six okay and that's it which is like really weird but possibly better but yeah no i don't think i i don't think i've seen anything close to that level of absurdity because what the fuck going from phantom blood to god to going from um cars straight out to joleen and crew that's weird max stands at the like the that's oh god no um i don't know why you shouldn't i can't think of anything that tops that yeah that's probably the worst one you two have the best examples uh and lastly uh one from paul and he just wants to

know i love marketing yeah hey super friend just a squad i live in houston texas and i've recently discovered booker t is running for mayor of my city oh what it's pretty cool he's taking a serious yeah i saw that announcement he's taking a serious bid uh for mayor which is awesome because like that means that or spin runes in the municipal government yeah i'd like to think that he left all of his wrestling secrets with the shogun and then he went on to become uh the politician you know um what wrestler would you want to run for mayor of your city mayor of my city probably kevin owens i mean that's the obvious because he lives here yep and he actually knows the city yeah kevin owens their sammy zane would be go to

i forgot about sammy yeah that'd be go go twos however those are boring they're right and while it doesn't really necessarily count i'm gonna go with one hundred percent vote for dario coito dario coito as mayor of montreal i would like current jeff hardy to be the mayor of scarred and broken broken jeff high yeah okay alternative picks chris benwas skeleton alternative pick um the rainmaker i would take okada oh you hear uh jimmy snooker died uh yeah that's a thing fucking oh well there goes that murderer it's like oh he's not fit to stand trial and everyone's like oh yeah and then he just fucking dies because you know why he's not fit he said he had six months

to live yeah and i was like oh that's another excuse because he got off the trials that he was pulled in last time that's like no wait no for real though he told the truth at the end jimmy yep did you know that like apparently uh i think ona were kind of responsible for bringing that back up really i was they were the because he they were the only interview he really did and they they straight up question him about it and that's when it came back in the public eye it's time for vents now there you go uh yeah dario dario or okada i would like i can't say i i i okay if i'm gonna pick a lucha underground character i'm gonna say that masked man in the limo that sounds like death

what what uh right you gotta catch up man all right it went for being mortal combat to being dbc okay all right that's that's more than good enough uh that got dark as the as the mayor of my god no no he would have to be the the like the comptroller okay yeah basically you know like one of those one of those uh office jobs you get him get him involved him in like kenny omega or some shit um what the fuck death in a limo i want to is it have you read the comics yet i've read some of them okay and others there's a guy are they escalating beyond that because i have beyond because i've

read the first coming there's a gauntlet of power oh man somebody put it on and the fakest photoshop sparks ever shot out no no no that's not even the best the best is there has been a gimmick in a wrestler keeps receiving gifts gifts that are tarantulas and it's very scary right and the first one real tarantula in a box of course it is the one from last week real tarantula in the box but well they had to do the locker room shot and the locker room shot has the tarantula screen across the ground it's like a two dollar halloween tarantula yeah by a string yeah dude they know oh that's perfect it's the best it's the best oh sweet okay there are people physically teleporting through each other oh yeah on camera not not like cutaways now there's full

full blown ghost shenanigans i will say that there is a peak they will never be able to reach which is when that one episode of raw had lightning strike inside of the the arena that's money that's danger and it never happened again and i think it was cut out of the replay because it was super unsafe because it was totally not okay but it happened and i saw it live if somebody was wearing a lot of metal like it could have just hit some rando in the audience i will never forget that but i appreciate the slow escalation while remembering your dollar store routes what is coming up what's coming out what are we got parasite eight we got dark souls we got more one-offs lots more one-offs you can't stop these one-offs um and uh i'm looking forward to patch

3.5 and 14 i'm looking forward to neo uh wait is that is that soon that is uh January 20th is the next uh stream and then on February something February something the actual game drops like it's now neos coming wow neos coming it's it's it's with it's weeks away that's crazy i did not i did not realize i thought it was gonna be like holiday or summer no no no no no no no no no no it's coming to tear your ass up it's gonna tear her ass up tear your ass up raw uh it's amazing like i had easier times with the bosses than i did with the normal enemies that i'm i'm really excited to see what they balanced that game at because the demo that came out that that i played was fucked that thing was fucked was so strong yeah so tough yeah um looking forward to yakuza

zero comes out tomorrow buy it yeah support it buy an extra copy for your friend i've never played there well honestly will eat i've tested yakuza 3 this is a this is a decent place to start because it's a prequel and it takes place in the 80s so you don't really need any uh for knowledge other than yeah do you like sega arcade games then you would probably like this do you like sega arcade games and k dramas i i i like your k dramas again in the process of testing i watched the movies for one and two and then i i i played the intro okay three for a bit so i got the gist of it these guys know how to tear off their shirts and jackets in one motion without taking their arms out of their sleeves they just reach down around their waist yeah and just throw their clothes off

um oh i want it's like grandpa simpson taking his underwear off without taking his pants off right but how'd you do that i don't know i wanted to talk a bit a bit about rime but i kind of forgot but like i'm looking forward to that rime is that new is that soon as well uh no but it is is announced for all things and um it looks really cool boy adventure puzzle man works for me you know it does it yeah puzzles oh think twice about that apparently parasite even has puzzles in it oh boy yeah apparently those are coming in hot and heavy somebody sent you a spoiler free guide couple of them for set for that and uh you gotta gotta look at every object you can't assume the background has no objects should i should i go back and get that black card press the triangle button

should i go back and get that black card uh we're look i can come in early on Wednesday i do it like i honestly think i think that we're gonna try our best um but i don't get that black card yeah that's fine i but i think that there's a lot there is considering how fickle getting that ending is it seems like we're probably gonna miss it probably in which case we can just watch it after so we'll just watch it after you guys just watch it we'll try to get it but if we don't get it dsp it there you go best friends try it um and i think that's pretty much anything else you want to add not really uh i guess um yeah i've been i've been uh trying to like circumvent and not overlap stream schedules with you guys for the let it die thing but i think i'm just gonna

like just do it pick a day and do it because that's been the hardest part is um trying to find a spot so i think i'm probably gonna pick something like let's say Saturday maybe this Saturday that's clean and no i'll put a thing up so that at the very least it's out there yeah put a thing up all right just tell joe and then joe will will organize it for you hmm hmm oh kingdom hurt uh not kingdom hurt some yeah um um what should we call it gravity rush too also is uh a thing oh yeah that's tomorrow yeah gravity there's a lot of good stuff coming out yeah there's something else i know there's another one that we're forgetting like a big one uh kingdom hearts 2.8 oh that's the one yep you're right that's the one fuck that game fuck everything about it final chapter prologue

did you play the mobile game fuck you did you catch up on your story yeah kingdom hearts hell okay here's my answer you know what the most jacked up way to play a series in any way that you played the kingdom hearts series right yeah anyway there's no correct sequence of events anymore the correct sequences watch that video on youtube that just puts them all together no the correct answer is find that google doc that just doesn't use words it just has photos of characters with lines and it's it's a photo of a character and it goes this guy hates this guy and just uses photos of the character read it and then never play kingdom hearts and then cry because it makes one tour good games but that story just why would you do

why would you why would you do it's just a god damn crossover game why does it need to be this complicated it's i just want to see goofy hang out with fucking the cloud and be like oh of course you guys you're sad shit all right we'll see you next week guys see you next week picture girl in a mall mall shopping for self esteem today is the last call from model 2016 us all the ice she could choose

blank page with a hard cover pair of expensive shoes feed all all all individuality is the price of integrity never show something better

the only I she could lose individuality is the price of integrity individuality she feeds off the ascension of a deaf and blinded crowd she lives off the attraction of a nose with liver it's on the racket now

all all all she feeds off the attention of a daffy by Dick Rowley she lives off the attraction of an old river cracked and rusted she feeds off the attention of a daffy blinded crowd she lives off the attraction of an old river cracked and rusted