Change Your Brain Every Day - Alysha Newman's Journey Out of the Doom Loop to Olympic Glory

Episode Date: November 4, 2024

In this week's episode of Change Your Brain Every Day, Dr. Daniel Amen is joined by Olympic bronze medal-winning pole vaulter (and viral sensation) Alysha Newman for a discussion on how she was able to overcome setbacks, break through her mental hurdles, and ultimately achieve her dreams. Dr. Amen and Alysha discuss the role the "Doom Loop" can play in those looking to attain peak performance, and how turning attention to the "Healing Loop" can help to reduce or eliminate both physical and emotional pain, setting the stage for victory. 00:00 Intro 00:52 Alysha’s Olympic Journey/Concussion 04:52 Alysha and Dr. Amen Team Up 09:04 Automatic Negative Thoughts 11:06 Sponsor 11:30 The Doom Loop 14:28 Irlen Syndrome 16:14 The Healing Loop 17:09 Positivity Bias Training 19:35 The Rule of 12 22:15 EMDR/Ankle Injury 27:08 Embracing Brain Health 34:08 Work Highlights 41:31 Proving People Wrong Vs. Proving People Right 46:34 Paris Olympics 49:56 Sponsor 51:15 Bronze Medal 55:46 Courage 56:50 Presence 58:10 Gold Medal Elite Brain Affirmation 1:01:22 One Page Miracle 1:06:15 Alysha’s Brain SPECT Scan 1:09:44 Purpose 1:11:18 Wrap Up

There was one day I'd wake up, I would be like, this is the best life ever. And then two hours later, I wanted nothing to do with life. I didn't even want to live. And it just wasn't me. I became a character that I didn't recognize. And it was really hard. And I remember looking at my mom like, what do we do? And she goes, well, let's go to a doctor.

Let's just see what happens. And their first instinct for me was, OK, let's treat the symptoms. You're anxious, you're overwhelmed, and you have an Olympic Games coming up. Let's put you on antidepressants. Now, obviously, full circle, I needed that to happen to be who I am today, but at the time, it was such a wrong diagnosis.

Every day, you are making your brain better, or you are making it worse. Stay with us to learn how you are making your brain better or you are making it worse. Stay with us to learn how you can change your brain for the better every day. So I am here with the Olympic medalist, Alicia Newman. Sounds good. Excited to have you. Thank you. We have been on this journey together for the last three years been a while three almost three

years ago yeah you came and you were sort of a mess not sorta a lot of mess and so you've actually And right before Tokyo in April 2021, you fell in the bathtub in Iowa. And you had a bad concussion. And you had gone to Rio and that was when you were a baby and really young and excited. And getting ready for Tokyo, the fall really changed things for you. Yeah. Talk about that. Yeah. So it was a mindless get into the shower, you know, after practice, we were all going out to dinner after, and it was just me stepping at the wrong step at the wrong time. And I went face first into a faucet. Um, not one of my most proud moments, but right from there, I got really dizzy. I did throw up and I kind of army

crawled to my bed to get to my phone, to call my agents and to see if I was actually okay. Um, but I like really after like maybe two hours, once the paramedics looked me over everything, I was like, you know what? I can actually compete tomorrow. I think I'm okay. And I didn't really feel any effects. Again, when you're in that athlete mindset, you feel like you're invincible. You feel like nothing's going to affect you. You feel like you're on top of the world because you have to feel that way to be the best at

something. And so later did I figure out that month you know, month after month after month, I was just not getting better. I had very much couldn't fall asleep. I was having hard time seeing, I would see black spots everywhere, anywhere I walked outside, any white wall, I would see black and string little, um, black spots. And then I would also be so emotional. I was like, there was one day I'd wake up. I would be like, this is the best life ever. And then two hours later, I wanted nothing to do with life. I didn't even want to live. And it just wasn't me. I became a character that I didn't recognize.

And it was really hard. And I remember looking at my mom, like, what do we do? And she goes, well, let's go to a doctor. Let's just see what happens. And their first instinct for me was, okay, let's treat the symptoms. You're anxious, you're overwhelmed, and you have an Olympic Games coming up. Let's put you on antidepressants. And I think it was, you know, now obviously full circle, you know, I needed that to happen to be who I am today. But at the time it was such a wrong diagnosis. They didn't diagnose the actual injury of what happened. You know, they diagnosed my emotions and I felt like I just was misled and being on antidepressants was even worse. You know, I broke out in hives. I wasn't eating. I was felt like I was, you know, my excessive drinking is like

twice a week, right. At that time. And then I was drinking three times a week, you know, so like things just weren't adding up what was normal for me. And so after that happened, I felt very embarrassed. I felt like I was at my lowest in Tokyo. I remember coming home on a flight from Tokyo. I got plastered on the flight because I didn't want to feel anything. I just wanted to sleep the full 12 hours home. And the airline called my, the team manager. And then my parents picked me up. I don't even think I collected my suitcase. And I went and slept in my parents' bed for a week post that. So that's when I reached out to you. Um, and I said need help I'm I'm I have don't know where

to go I don't know who to who can help me and what can we do from now like is there any saving or is this my life forever right so you dm'd me yes slid into your dm and wonderful Natalie fought saw that yes she did so for someone who is the Canadian champion and you've been the Canadian pole vaulting champion for how long um I mean in the senior category probably 10 years now so I've won Canadian seniors and so to go to Tokyo yeah not make any bars yeah not even jump Well, it was just a time in your life that this is my profession. It'd be like, you know, if you showed up to work and didn't know how to diagnose a patient or you didn't know what to do with them, you know, you're like completely not present and you want nothing to do with anyone around you. You want nothing to do with yourself and your thoughts. And it just became very, why am I living? And that's when I started questioning myself because

I love life and I've always loved life. And so it was interesting to feel that something felt so minor be such a big thing that held me back from me accomplishing what I believed I could accomplish a long time ago. But again, full circle. So if you ask me, Daniel, what's the single most important thing you've learned from 250,000 scans? Yes. Mild traumatic brain injury ruins people's lives and nobody knows about it. And it's insane. So if you would have seen me, I'm like, oh, we have to look at your brain. Yes. And how did you find me? Yeah. Well, actually I've always followed you on Instagram. And actually, if we go back to right from the beginning, I was dating an NFL player. And he was always concerned. You know, you hear about CTE.

You hear about how they become aggressive and they're not themselves post-playing. And so I was curious at that time when I was dating him. I said, I hadn't mentioned it to him. I was like, I think we should go get our brain scanned. And at the time, he took it very offensively. He goes, I'm fine. I don't need any help. Everything is great. But at the time, he took it very offensively. He goes, I'm fine. I don't need any help. Everything is great.

But at that time, I didn't want to overstep. He's in his profession. It was like, if you want to, I want to do it too. Well, come full circle, three years later after we've gone our own ways, I said, I still am interested in that. And I kept following you all these years. So I've probably been following you since 2014 or actually maybe 2015, you know, in university, because I just was so intrigued by the human brain and pole vault is one of the most mental sports in track and field. And I could

never understood why like things were happening when I was trying to physically do something, but my brain was stopping me from doing something. Well, it's important, I think, that you mentioned your relationship with the NFL player because it became very public. Yes. That his brain may not have been as healthy as it could be. Yeah. And you guys made TMZ and it was a disaster. Not TMZ you want to be on.

Not the good TMZ. If there is. It's not NBC Sports. Yeah, exactly. Exactly. And that's the thing. I think when you love someone so much and you see it, you want to help that person out.

But again, like we've even talked about this until someone really wants to help themselves, you can only lead them so much. You can't force them to want to change. And again, I'm, I hope, and I've always wished for him to have the best. I think we've talked about this a long time ago. I don't need forgiveness. I don't need any of that. It was, okay, hopefully he's being taken care of and he's happy and he's healthy because now that I've been through what I've been through, I only empathize with him on like what he's been through. Yeah. And if you don't look, you don't know.

Yeah. Nothing venture, nothing gain. you don't know yeah nothing venture nothing game isn't that crazy and so concussion in april you see me i think in november november of that year yeah the olympics were a disaster yeah for you and when i saw you i thought you were depressed. Yes. Really negative. I was. Infested with what we call ants. Yes. Automatic negative thoughts. Yes. And your mind was bouncing all over the place.

And I remember you told me this one thing the first time we met is, I will be a failure if I don't meddle in Paris, and my future children will be disappointed in me. And when you said that, I'm like, we have good work to do. There's something to fix. We need to fix that because ultimately if you meddle, which you did, you just made it harder on your children. Yeah.

Right? Because now they're going to feel like they have to live up. Yeah. And either way, your kids aren't going to care. Yeah. Right. Cause now they're going to feel like you have to live up and either way, your kids aren't going to care if you show up for them. And if you listen and if you're kind, right. I mean, ultimately, right. That's what you wanted. Exactly. What you want from your mom. Well, and you sit there and you think like, these things are the most important to me, but you realize the things that are most important, you can't happen until you're willing to like make those changes or actually commit that time into trying to be different. And that's been the difference for me. I thought it was like, you know, a month of being good, you know, of treating myself right and talking to myself in the mirror, but it's a

lifetime thing. It's like, it's not never guaranteed. We're going to wake up and feel great. I even have some bad mornings still to this day, but I still know the feeling of having great mornings and I'm more invested in those days. And I let the bad days go, you know, you can't, you learn from them, right? One of the big hallmarks is win or learn. Yeah. That's what got me through the last two years. There's no failure. This podcast is brought to you by the Change Your Brain Foundation, dedicated to ending the concept of mental illness by creating a revolution in brain health. Go to changeyourbrain.org to learn how you can support

our mission. So you were in the doom loop when I first met you. And the doom loop starts in pain HQ. That's the acronym for it. So the P is their pain triggers. Yeah. And you had two big ones, which was the concussion and how that changed things for you. And then the failure. Yeah. And what that does is it alerts your brain, we have a problem and then it activates and we're going to show your skin something called the medial pain suffering pathway and that pathway is vulnerable right and failure clearly is past trauma of course right but you also had the

domestic issue yeah with your ex yeah that was traumatic you also broke your back when you were 12 years old yes because you initially didn't want to be a pole vaulter you initially wanted to be a gymnast yeah but you got too big yeah too tall too tall yeah and then you hurt yourself yeah right over training too yeah probably traumatic yeah and so and you were bullied in school my whole life and you were different right you've always yeah been different i always never understood why like someone would do something and i wanted to do the other thing it was my whole life so now i understand why and then when you activate that pain pathway yeah you get this invasion evasion of ants and negativity bias and catastrophic thinking, which then leads to muscle tension, the nervous tension, and then some repressed emotions, which we end up dealing with.

Which I really feel that at that fourth, that nervous tension, then that becomes like muscle tension too. I was having aches and pains that I've never had before in my track career. And I didn't understand where it was coming from, which I think is cool that that was also a physical warning, you know, for me. Which then leads to bad habits. Try to get rid of the pain. More pain, more fear, bad habits to try to fix things. Yeah.

And the doctors are just sort of throwing medicine at you. Yes. But they're not connecting, right? No. They think it's the stress of the Olympics rather than the concussion. Concussion, yeah. That change things, which then gives you in this quagmire that quickens pain and limits motion yes and one of the wild cards and all of this for you which is very common in people who have

concussions yeah is the erlin syndrome yes and when i first met you and then i saw your scam i'm like she has the erlin syndrome yeah and actually sent you to Long Beach and Helen Erland. She was amazing. For people who don't know that, the Erland syndrome is a visual processing disorder where you end up with depth perception problems and then headaches and trouble reading and trouble focusing and depth perception problems in a pole vaulter.

If you just think of the amazing things you do with your body, it's just incredible. And if you're off just a half a centimeter, it can change it and you can end up hurt. Yeah. Which is why you didn't jump because you knew you might hurt yourself. Yeah. And in Tokyo or in any athletic stadium at night, the lights are so bright.

Yes. They disrupt brain function. Yeah. And that's where I was starting to realize my thoughts were so heightened, which is the ants. I was thinking of, Oh, what's that person over there doing in the middle of my competition, someone in the stands, I would eating a burger. It was like, I wonder what that burger tastes like. You know, like it was just so heightened into ways I've never seen it before. And, and again, that depth perception,

I was running into things at home that I've never really run into. So these were like key little warning signs, right? That I, now that we're out of it, we know. And so that's why I think it's so good that we're sharing it because I think it's important. And ultimately the healing loop, it came to recognizing the triggers. And every day we learn from them, right? Our mantra for the last three years is win. Or learn. Or learn. Yeah.

Right? Never lost. And you even said that in one of the post-Olympic interviews. I didn't fail. Never. At all. Yeah. I won or I learned.

Yeah. Yeah. yeah i won or i learned yeah yeah and then calm this suffering pathway with breathing and havening yeah certain supplements to help calm things down um and then you became masterful at killing the ants yeah we were good at that i hired a whole team it's a minion team. We're going to get to the minions. Positivity, bias training. So when I first saw you on a scale of 0 to 100, you were 27.

So 73% of people were more positive than you. And I think now you're like 74 or something. Your positivity has just grown so much. And when I first saw you, you were really good at reading faces. Yeah. But you read negative faces way faster. And now you read positive faces faster. Oh, I didn't realize that.

You're a little paranoid yeah because you were sad yeah and you were well it was probably what i was feeling was what i was attracted to you know and i think you naturally attract what do they say um misery loves company you know it's a huge saying and it's true i think i wanted people to feel sad with me so you would recognize that a lot more and to be related, you know? And then later on, as you get better and better, you don't really like being around negative people. At all.

It's hard to feel sorry for some people. And you want to, though, because you have a heart still, obviously. But you're like, gosh, but your life's so beautiful because you see their life through your eyes and your feelings. And then you're like, gosh, but your life's so beautiful because you see their life through your eyes and your feelings. And then you're like, your life is amazing. What are you talking about? And you can't really feel bad for people, you know? And that's been, that's been something really eyeopening for me in the last couple of months, for sure. So do you remember when you told me if the girls would be negative, that would really bother you.

Yeah. Do you remember what I told you? Well, you told me how to cope with it. I said, that's your competitive advantage. Yes. Because when you're negative, it actually turns off the cerebellum in the back bottom part of the brain, which is your coordination center. Yes. bottom part of the brain right which is your coordination center yes and so if they're

negative and you're not yeah you're gonna jump higher exactly than them and i remember at the finals yeah there are five girls left yes and two of them were negative yeah they were like oh i'm gonna meddle yeah i'm about to meddle right now um so letting go of the negativity um we did a lot of positivity bias training and one of my favorite ones was the rule of 12. oh this is my favorite one i still have it in my pocket it's like psychological flexibility is a sign of mental health yeah if you get upset with everything that goes wrong, you're a victim of whatever circumstances you're in. And so the rule of 12 is I'm not going to be angry until the 12th thing has gone wrong.

And I took it a step further. I'm not going to react until 12 things have gone wrong because I think we're quick to react based off of something that could have happened in your life. But to me, it was like, even at the Olympics, like there was tons of things happening in the infield that I was like, Nope, not at 12 yet. I'm at eight, but I'm not at 12. Right. And in the olympic final yeah there was this long delay yes because one of the standards standards yes they broke broke and that was frustrating yeah it was i think at the point

i was like i remember um the silver medalist katie she's like this always happens and i was like oh really because i didn't recognize this obviously this is my first time in this situation um and so it was funny because it was like it didn't matter what was happening obviously at that point we knew we meddled but I was still going to give my best foot forward on my next attempt no matter how long I had to wait it's the Olympic Games and that was I mean I get goosebumps saying it because in Tokyo 2021, I was like, get me out of this stadium. And now I say Olympics, I say Paris. And I'm like, give me more.

Like, let me go to LA. I want to be at LA. Let me be there. So training your mind. And that happened over a long period of time. Like when you get up in the morning and say, say well today is going to be a great day yes when you go to bed at night yeah it went well today yes you just made these practices and then we developed an olympic medal affirmation which we'll share yes um and then initiate relaxation, emotional expression. Yeah.

And we did 40 sessions of EMDR. Yeah. Eye movement, desensitization, and reprocessing. And that's where the minions showed up. They came in. They were there. They were hiding in my subconscious brain. But it was a light for me because i came back to the chill

the childness in me having minions around you watching they're just like little fun little guys so the people watching are they're gonna like okay who is this what's going on emdr is a specific psychological treatment yes for trauma yes but we all and I noticed this, when we would go back to traumatic events for you, you would get sad. So we also used it to fly high for you in your mind to visualize success and greatness. And we did it over and over. But we also went after the trauma processed it yeah and in february of this year you're just about to go to the indoor finals yes you're one of the leaders because you had a great indoor season yes i did and you sprained your ankle yes and how did you

sprain your ankle walking over a hurdle doing something you sprain your ankle? Walking over a hurdle, doing something. I need to be in a bubble. That's just me. What's wrong with me? It's like injuries. And that's what ended up being one of our clicks was none of my major injuries have ever happened pole vaulting. And I'm like, oh, so it's safest pole vaulting. So I just need to pole vault every day.

And so you were sort of cooling down after practice and you walked over a hurdle or jumped over the hurdle yeah I just misplaced my foot coming over a hurdle I mean I do that every time after practice and it just happened to be again a wrong step maybe a little tired I mean we talked a lot about our HRV like over the last couple years and it was lower that day. So for people who don't know that it's heart rate variability training. One of the things we use to help you to get your body more relaxed. When HRV is low, you're more vulnerable to injuries.

And so here it is February, the Olympics are in August and you severelyust and you severely yeah i have a picture yeah it's gross yes that was but you know i was so proud of you because you didn't let it defeat you yeah i think that was only my like ninth injury in my career. So I can't get mad yet. Right. And you worked really hard. And I love that you kept your mind strong and you did hyperbaric oxygen, which has been a huge positive benefit for your brain and your body. And even time alone, like going in there to like get off your phone like you're in a in a you're

locked in this chamber for 90 minutes it really allowed me to like take a nap it forced me to take a nap every day and i think we talk about how important sleep is and that was a forced to help me sleep and then after the injury and you're recovering, you're like, why do I have this thought that I'm going to be hurt? Yeah. And so we did EMDR around, I'm going to be hurt. Yes. And that's where the minions show up in your mind. Yes. And they, they were, again, like I said, they were a light to me. It was, I need a team. I can't do this alone. I'm clearly going through another cycle of feeling that I'm going to get hurt again because we talked about it. It hurt that ankle sprain was probably my

worst ankle sprain to this date. I've sprained my ankles a lot too. And it just, the recovery of it, we did end up getting PRP shots shots so a lot of my ligaments were concreted to each other and the acupuncture and the release of it was like painful the most pain i've ever had if you want to torture somebody put acupuncture needles at the bottom of someone's foot and i kid you not they'll never come back but it was just pain I've never experienced in my career. But I knew my end goal was to make it to the Olympics. And I'm not letting this injury tell me I'm not going to medal. Like I can't. And I needed to find a team that like made things light. And that's my dad. He's very good at that. And I think of my dad as a minion. I think of him as like, again,

we're just here having fun. Let's play. Like let's play all the time. And once think of my dad as a minion. I think of him as like, again, we're just here having fun. Let's play. Like let's play all the time. And once we lighten that up, I think those thoughts slowly started to fade away, which is the ants of me thinking I was going to get hurt. Well, and so what I remember when we were doing EMDR around, you're going to be hurt again yeah you got this image of like 12 minions and they all together went ah we're not helping her yes we're hurting her yes so we need to help her yes and that's where the minions come in which become very important yes. So you let go of the ants. We did EMDR. So important. We'll talk about some of the themes.

Yeah. And then you embraced brain health. Yes. I was so proud of you. Yes. Because, you know, for anybody who knows anything about me, like, it's not mental illness. It's brain health. It's brain health. Get your brain healthy and your mind will follow.

Yep. You're a world-class bull, Walter. Alcohol damages your cerebellum. Yeah. Probably you should stop drinking. Yes. Well, I think it was just one of those realization. It was again, one of those things, nothing venture, nothing gain. And you hear about, you know, people go dry January and I was like, Oh, let me just try a month. And then, you know, I started actually, I remember the date, September 24th, 2023. I said, I'm not drinking ever again. And it was very hard.

The first two months, I was like, I don't know what we're talking about. I don't think this is helping. I felt like I couldn't be as social. I couldn't do this. And then month three came around. I was like, oh, like I'm recovering a lot faster. I'm not as tired in my workouts. And then month six and seven. I was like, Oh, like I'm recovering a lot faster. I'm not as tired in my workouts. And then month six and seven, I was remembering names. I was remembering things from

my childhood. I started remembering people and environments. And I think maybe a little more trauma came back because I started being more clear minded. And so we started working on even more trauma stuff. And I think at the end of the day, you start realizing that it's, it's like, um, putting like a clouded sheet in front of your eyes. Every month that went by a little bit clearer came to my, my mind and I could feel emotions. I could control my, my physical on the runway. I could tap into being tunnel vision or being fun and light and happy. I was able to control my thoughts. And that's where I tell people, I was like, again, this was for me. And it's not like you ever said, Alicia, stop drinking. I mean, I worked with you

almost two years before that. And you said, I just recommend, I recommend it. And finally, I just said, I'm going to try it. And I think to this day, I, well, again, I had a glass of champagne after the Olympics, but again, it wasn't what I thought of a celebration. It was, I can't wait to go to sleep and have dreams about what I just did. You know, the mindset would change. And again, maybe that's not fun to people, but to wake up the next day and feel all the feels from the Olympic games and not feel hungover has been so fun for me. Yeah, I never got why that was fun.

Yeah. And I went to the party that went on to the middle of the night. Yes, you were so good too. And there was lots of alcohol. Yeah, you were really good. The more the alcohol goes, the less interesting people become. Yes. If you're sober.

Yes, of course. Words just don't make sense at that point but you had such a wonderful family then we talked a lot about your diet a lot and this is where you know whenever i see dried mangoes i think of you and we just we spent a lot of time just sort of going through how you ate before competitions. I think one of my main concerns was, is this the concussion? Why I all of a sudden get halfway through a competition and I don't want to be there anymore. I think that was one of my first topics to you. And you're like, what are you eating in the infield? I was like, oh, dried mangoes,

you know, Red Bull, like these very high sugar foods. And you're like, oh my gosh, Alicia, are you all right? Like, do you need help? I'm like, clearly. So it was really an aha moment for us because not only were we working very, very hard on the brain health, now we're going to take nutrition to help the brain health because you can, again, only take so many vitamins that are going to help, but your everyday habits of like eating the right food to fuel you. I didn't realize that really affected me while I was competing. And again, dried mangoes over like, I know like Sandyris loves a mars bar and it works for her but if i were to eat a mars bar my sugars would crash so hard and you wore a continuous

glucose monitor yes for months for actually yeah two times two weeks so yeah a month a month long and you saw what foods spiked your blood sugar and where you were. Yeah, that was huge because it wasn't a lot of different things. It was changing from jasmine rice to brown rice, changing from dried almonds to an apple with almond butter. You know, so it wasn't crazy different of changes. It was just switching, you know, different brands or different things. Little things that you liked. Yeah, that I still was eating, you know, brands or different things that you like yeah that i still was eating you know and i enjoyed it but you know when you have a long competition you have to protect your

blood sugar because when it goes low then you don't want to be there and it's not that you don't want to be there it's your blood sugar you just crashed yeah and you want to go sleep that's how i think of like you know eating thanksgiving everyone wants to sleep after because we eat all all this food at Thanksgiving and then you go into a food coma and that's what was happening on the infield I was eating nuts and dried fruit and all these things and all of a sudden within that 30 to an hour I was only halfway through my competition I was like oh I'm good for the day I'm gonna go home I want to rest one of my favorite strategies that you did was when you learned how to kill the ants is you would imagine these two white lines going down the runway and they're white, hot, hot. So the ants couldn't jump over and get you. Yes. Cause ultimately when you jump high, you're not thinking, right?

You're relying on the 10,000 hours of practice on your skill. And you didn't allow the negativity to come in. Yeah, well, you create a boundary. And I used to do that a lot with my exes. When they would say bad things or say something that was disrespectful, I'd put them in a corner, like a timeout. In the corner, they weren't actually in the corner. In my mind, they were in the corner. And it was a way for me to cope, to say, okay, we're going to put them in timeout. But the same thing for my aunts on the infield. It was like, when I'm in between these

two white lines, no negative or no one can get to me. This is my safe space. This is where I'm going to be my strongest, my most powerful, female athlete-wise, and I'm going to light it up. And then when I get off the mat, we'll deal with the ants once we get off the mat and we're outside of those white lines. And we'll deal with them, right? We'll kill them all. Yes, well, that's why I had to hire 12 minions.

They had to bazooka them and you know as we do all of that thing it fosters healing motion a better mood more connection yeah and the self-perpetuating healing look and the three years we worked i mean we worked hard all three years. No, we were very consistent too. I think that was huge. So some of the highlights. We worked on being the CEO of your life. I've been a CEO for 35 years. I love, it's like, okay, what's the goal? Well, and two, people don't think that you deserve your life.

And you are. You are the CEO of your own life. And to know that power. Too often, I think you were run by what you thought other people wanted. And that was huge for me to be like, wait, is that their goal or my goal? And that slowly we figured that out on what actually my goals were. Yeah. And before the Olympics, you gave everybody who came.

Yes. Tasks. Roles. They loved it. It was my siblings, my mom and dad and jake as well like we put them in roles and my sister was team captain so she was great she was amazing she is she truly is she saved in my phone as my better half because she truly is but you were in charge rather than being a victim of the chaos of the olympics Olympics. And we worked on this a lot, anticipating obstacles

and what had been problems in the past. And you're the boss. Yeah, and that was a hard leadership role that I wanted not to accept at first because I said, it's my Olympics. They should go and have fun and they do what they want. But little did I know because I love them so much, everything they do affects me because I care for them. And so by not being rude, not being aggressive, but saying, hey guys, here's how I see you in my life. This is how you've helped me get here. And I hope you

can continue it through the next 16 days at the Olympics. And it was the same thing. My brother, he always texts me before competition. So he texted me the morning. It's like a replay, you know, it's like a consistent routine that you don't go out of line and you're on the path that you know, and you're, and you're aware of. And that was, I wish I could give all my siblings a piece of the metal because they really stuck to those roles and they love them. They embrace it. Any other potential family could have been like, why are we taking roles from you? Like we're here to support.

We support you. We love you. Why do we need a role? But they dove right in it with me. So that was cool. And so clarity of what you needed. We talked about that a lot yeah and then one of the biggest things we talked about was being your best yes and not the best no and katie yes after she won the gold in tokyo she said it was the worst year of her life.

Yes, yes. And I wrote an opinion piece during the Tokyo Olympics about why the Olympics are bad for people. Yeah, I believe that. Because you have to be the best. And to be the best, that means you have to be the best. And to be the best, that means you have to beat other people. And that's a prescription for separation and misery. But to be your best,

well, then you can help other people be their best too. And that's to bring people together. And you won or you learn yeah and you're so consistent the last four months or so yeah so consistent and i was hungry and i wanted it because i knew every competition i went i was my best and it was good enough to be one, two, or three at the Olympics at any competition I did. Right. And I think that's what, when you say I got to be the best, you make it a world opinions, everybody's opinions in it. But when you say my best, it's just you and your internal self. And that's why I just needed to be better than I was the competition before. And then

I do it again and I do it again and I did it all the way to my medal. And that's what was such a- And beyond. And then beyond now. Yes, for sure. Right. In Rome and Switzerland and Belgium. Yep. And I backed it up. It was one of those things you have that thought of like, oh, am I going to lose this high from the Olympics? But I embraced it. I embraced everything that came my way. All the messages I received, all the people that I crossed and got to share my medal with. It was a lot of energy

and I felt drained at the end of most days, but I said, this is the part of it. This is what you get to be a part of being an Olympic medalist. And I think because my mindset was so positive, I never went in to a negative and feeling like i'm tired i just want to go home and i just want to sleep you know it was because you weren't drinking yeah and you were eating right you're not drinking you're eating right you don't believe all the negative things going on in your mind yes um and every day you won or you learned yeah um you aligned your team. We worked on purpose. And your purpose was not the medal. It was to inspire the next generation. You know, a medal seems like it's for one person. And I think, you know, I got to my third Olympics

realizing I'm not doing this for myself. I'm doing it for the team. And then now I'm doing it for the next generation of female pole vaulters. I'm the first ever Canadian female pole vaulter to bring home a medal for Canada. I'm a historical and like to know that I can take that title and run with that. Now there's a lot of good things going to come my way and then their way because I paid that path for them. And that's what I look forward to. I've matured very quickly in my mindset because I wanted to be that leader for Canada. And your coach has a daughter who's a pole vaulter. She's a teenager. But she's actually really good. She's incredible.

And you inspire her. Yes. And that's what's been. I wrote her a beautiful long letter after the Olympics. And I said, thank you, because she would train with me on Tuesdays. And I said, thank you for bringing my inner self back because she was a spitting image of who I was when I was her age. And I said, you're right. I started pole vault just like Nella's starting. And without her by my side, the last year, year and a half, I don't think I would have accomplished this. She showed me that sports should be fun, challenging, but also thrilling all at once.

And it was very, very cool and a surreal moment for me to be next to her. We have photos of her holding my pole when she just learned to walk when she was two years old. And then we have her now jumping. She just missed my record at 15 years old. So I jumped 375 and she just missed the 75 bar and she went 370 this year. So that's what I hope for her. And I hope I can pave that path for her because again, I- And you can give her some mindset tools that will help her. And she's a teenager.

It's like, you know, maybe when they offer you alcohol the night before a tournament, you want to say no. Yes. Might save her some time. And so you were the world indoor pole vaulting champion in 2023. Yes. It was amazing. And then you sprained your ankle. And we got involved with Minions.

Yes. And while we were at the Olympics, I asked Jet GPT to draw this. This is so good. One of the really interesting parts of our journey was, because I tend to be a bit Pollyannish, and you would tell me when you got angry at your ex or at Team Canada or whatever. It's like, do you jump higher when you're angry? Or do you jump higher when you're proving people wrong or proving people right?

And the Pollyanna part of me wants you to jump higher when you prove people right. Yes. And then I got over myself and I went, oh, we should see. Let's just try it. We should just, this tournament focus on proving people wrong. And this tournament focus on proving people right. And you jump higher when you're proving somebody wrong, when're angry but then we married the images yes emdr yes where when you jumped higher the people you're proving wrong yeah blow up in the stadiums and the people you're proving right or sort of holding hands. And the minions go grab the energy from the people who blew up. Yes. And we said because I was shooting for the moon and hoping to land on stars.

So the minions were collecting all the fuel of the people that blew up. And the fuel, which was the people that were negative, who didn't believe in me, they were going to be my fuel to go to space. And that was like a really aha moment for us because it was like, how do I get to the top of the world, the highest I can possibly jump? And it was to fuel myself with the negatives, but then remember why I'm using it.

It's to launch myself, to leave them behind. Right. So we had this balance, which is just a beautiful image. Yeah. And I remember when I showed it to you, you said, I really like my butt. Yeah, you did. I was like, dang, that's awesome. We should post that. So this is two weeks before Paris. This is in London. And you sent me this. Plenty of experience. It was a world championships back in 2017. Then it was 15th OHA a couple of years later.

With a headwind. I'm sorry. This is the headwind. Came back in February. Oh, we should talk about the wind. Yes. Been mixing it with the best. She was fourth in Monaco last week. The Canadian championships were 475 just before that. Here she goes,

4.75 here to take the lead. Oh beautiful, yeah listen to that shrink too. She knows that Max is the first time clearance is so important that applies the pressure to Kennedy and Cordray who have yet to go at this height, and Moser as well. Moser, we know, was struggling. Only cleared for a 65th third time. But Newman, well, I'll tell you what, even though she's been around a little while, Chris, she's a growing force in this discipline, isn't she? That's crazy. So proud of you.

So going into the Olympics, you're just at the peak yes of where you've been yeah ever really i was hungry too because the girls had started competing in may and i didn't start training till june and a lot of people don't know that um i actually what for some reason popped in my mind but at canadian championships which is the end of June, um, someone commented, Oh, she's getting old. She has cellulite on her legs. And I was like, Oh my gosh, it's, but they're not wrong. I just wasn't in the shape I needed to be at that time. And it's an aha moment again, because I'm like, gosh, look at what I did in three months of prepping for an Olympic games compared to, you know, I hadn had no competitions in March, April, or May.

I couldn't run. And I had told competitions I was going to be ready in May. And I couldn't make it there because I couldn't even get down the runway without pain. Amazing. And then you mentioned you saw the headwind. Yes. And the wind was a huge obstacle, but also opportunity that we had to deal with.

Because when pole vaulters have headwinds, it's harder to jump. And sometimes the wind comes from the side. Or it turns anywhere. It's coming from the back on one jump, or it comes headwind on the next jump, you know. So you're constantly adapting and you're trying to make movements on your step to be safe. So I think we came up with a pretty good strategy when it came to headwinds. They actually became one of your competitive advantages. Yes, it was an encouragement. It was, you got this, the wind's in your face, that means it's time to go.

Yeah. And the other girls had to deal with it as well. And you're stronger. Yes. Because of what great shape you were in. Yeah. And then here it is. So we go to Paris.

Yes. And you had never qualified for a final. Never. And two nights before, we talk for like an hour and a half and you're worried about sleeping yeah we did some exercises and you slept but the night before i had my phone turned off i'm so mad and the adrenaline got to you right away and you hardly slept like 45 minutes i think think, I slept that night. I actually took off my whoop.

Because, again, remember, we were really focusing on the HRV and my sleep hours leading into that point. And I said, uh-uh, we're not looking at this stat. Not today. And I think that's what's powerful. And I think that's what we have to also realize in life. Sometimes, you know, when you're sticking to this plan and things aren't going your way, it's okay to turn a blind eye to something that you're used to because you've prepped. I've prepped so many years for this moment that one bad night of sleep. And this is what you said is not going to affect me.

And then all of a sudden my family tapped into sending me the Colby Bryants and the Serena Williams and Michael Phillips. The nights before big events, they didn't sleep at all. They didn't sleep at all. And performed magically. Yeah. And you performed in the qualifier. Like it was no problem at all to get to 455, which is the qualifying.

But there was a glitch in how they score. And usually, what, it's eight or 12 girls that make the finals. And now, all of a sudden, 20 girls are in the finals. In the finals. And we're like, this is the biggest final in history of not just the Olympics, of any competition. You are not usually allowed above 16 girls. And in normal competition, it's 12.

And we turn that into this is your competitive advantage because you're in better shape than everyone. You're mentally strong. Eating the right food to keep my sugar up for four hours. And it's the Olympics. you want it to last long yes right i mean this is the last one standing a high a highlight in your life yes right and actually went way faster because a lot of the girls just couldn't make the high around 70 it started to seem there was about nine girls left around 70. And then I was actually in ninth because of my miss at 460. And that was a really cool time where I had to overcome

because I just woke up on the runway. I remember telling you, I'm like, I woke up on the runway. What am I doing at my first attempt? So all of your jumps were great except that one. Exactly. And it was like you spaced. Yeah, completely spaced. And I don't know if we call that stage fright.

I don't know if we call it, you know, you just had a moment of like a hiccup. And those are moments you shouldn't be having at the highest level. But I think we were very, very quick to turn that around and realize, oh, it's okay, because not 12 things have gone wrong. We're here, we have another attempt. That's why you got three attempts. So you just have to outjump every girl. Yeah. Hi, I'm Dr. Daniel Amen. I've experienced firsthand the powerful impact that proper supplementation can have on your brain, your body, and your mind. That's why I founded BrainMD. Our formulas are

scientifically created from decades of clinical research designed to help you think clearer, feel better, and improve every aspect of your health. Whether it's brain and body power max, the same formula I used in the world's largest study of NFL players to optimize brain performance, to happy saffron, to boost mood and memory, and prorainBiotics Max to improve the gut-brain connection. BrainMD delivers the highest quality science-backed solutions to help you think and feel better. Tana and I take many of our products every day. And as a special offer, just for our listeners, you can save 20% on your next order. Visit brainmd.com and use the code podcast20. With a better brain always comes a better life. So here is the bronze medal jumper. This year, outdoors, 476 her best.

Alicia Newman into the stratosphere. Yes! Oh, what a jump! Newman at 485. Still my favorite. Still my favorite clip. This is in the Olympics. Yes.

In the finals. Yes. Your personal best. I mean, just think about that. And you're really pushing Sandy and Katie. Yeah, push Katie. And Nina. And Nina.

And you fake an injury and twerk. What was going on in your head? Well, I think at a point, like you say, we worked so hard. We've taken so many hours to get to this point. And there was before a heaviness when the Olympics came. Remember, we worked really, really hard on the word just Olympics. And I remember when I went in and I remember my interview after the qualifying and I said, oh, now it's time to party. Like now, and this is where we're going to have fun. And I think

that that leading up to that jump, we were very, everyone was on eggshells on the infield. We're all trying our best. We're out there competing at our best. And I'm like, I need to let loose. And to know that that was a Canadian record. So the best I've ever been was that moment. And it was like after 2019 since I've jumped higher, you know, outdoor season. And I'm like, gosh, let's have fun now. Like why we, you know, we put all this time and effort and stress into trying to be the best in the world at something. Let me just let it all

out. And I think the, the fake injury was just cause it's a symbol of mine. I've been through a lot of injuries and I think still to this day, my coaches talk about, they really thought I got hurt. And then to break into the dance is just me. You know, I could have done a twirl. I could have done a backflip. I could have done anything. And I think it was just, I actually felt like it was like a quicker way to get my celebration done. So it didn't interfere with the other girls. Um, and I think a lot of times you try to be respectful and that etiquette when it comes to pole vault. So it was felt like just the right amount of celebration to then, okay, what's next? But it was fun.

And then from that moment. I think I told you, I have another famous patient who's famous for twerking. Who, oh, by the way, won the Grammy for Song of the Year this year. She's incredible too. She's amazing. So I don't know what's with me and twerking. Yeah. You bring a good twerk to us.

You just can't handle it. So fun. Yeah. And is that the moment you knew you meddled? No, because I think I was tied for third at that point. But to know, like no one can get mad at you for doing your absolute best at the Olympic games and coming forth, right? Like to go to an Olympic games and say, I got fourth. I can't be mad. Like I jumped the highest I've ever jumped ever in my career. And again, broke another Canadian record. So I think it was a moment

of relief for me that whatever happens from here on out, I am better than I was the day before or the previous 15 years of my career. Yeah, it's truly amazing. And then when you realized you got the medal? I realized it very quick. I mean, once Angelica missed her 490, I looked right up to you guys and coaches

and I just like, actually, I thought I would have cried. I, you know, in your head, you have like, how am I going to celebrate? Am I going to be emotional? What's going to happen? And I took a deep breath and I was like, now 490, let's go next par. Let's go. Wow. And then I have these pictures of us. This is so good. Look how good we look in red too, right? I know. Some of my American friends were like, why are you in red? Where's the red, white, and blue? Just for Canadian, just for women's pole vault.

Men, there you are on the podium. Yes. I am honored to share that medal with you. I got you this cool little present today, which is a necklace with the word courage. So talk about courage for a minute. People understand the minions. Yeah, the minions were the cutest part.

And then I read courage, and I'm like, this is, again, this is a moment that this word was so ingrained in me of being powerful and fierce and fearless. When you hear the word courage for me internally, it's like taking a leap of faith, letting the universe take its power and doing what it's supposed to do for you. And that is what changed my career this year. When I went to the new polls this year, because that was a huge thing too, brand new polls, brand new company. And I only jumped on them like a dozen times. And so I

had to have something in my back pocket that gave me faith that it was going to be the right decision. And the word courage is what got me through the next poll, the next bar, just the next bar, you know, those were words to me that allowed me to have this hope that it was like i could achieve it so that was another thing we worked on is being present yes that was not getting ahead of yourself yeah and so we came up with what might be the title of your book yes just the next bar. Yes, Just the Next Bar. And I think that that was huge. Again, for me to be present, I'm naturally, I think as females, sometimes we're natural overthinkers.

We're always thinking ahead. We have that mother intuition. We're always trying to prep for what could happen, a plan A or a plan B. And for me to go into the Olympics, I didn't want to have a plan B. I only wanted a plan A and the plan A was to medal. And it was so important to me that I stayed present because if I thought of a plan B, then you're allowing that thought to come in. And it's not a negative and, but it's just, oh, well, plan A is to medal. Plan B is you're a Canadian record holder again, and you've jumped your personal best. That's still amazing,

but you want plan A to work out. And so being present allowed me to just take one bar at a time and not worry about what happened on jumps before, not worry about what's going to happen, but how I can execute my best jumps every time down the runway. And then early on, we developed our gold medal affirmation. And we worked hard on this. It's on my back screen for, I think it ended up being a year and a half. I read it every morning in my cold plunge and and so you went and when you do an affirmation write down what the goal is

and i am a world-class charismatic pole vaulter who will compete for an olympic gold medal in so rather than i will get it yeah it's like you just want to be there i want to be there which you totally yeah and i'm going to compete i'm going to compete and bring my best self forth and then we have the value the benefit i enjoy the recognition and being one of the best pole vultures in the world and you said this i love the hardware for the hard work yes i like wanted that so bad and you have the metal here somewhere yes i do it's in my purse we should show them you can go in there yeah yeah i think it's right here i have to tuck it away yeah look how pretty this is it's heavy too i always like drop it in people's hands. Their face is like, whoa, it isn't that cool.

I love it. And then we had our plan. And this was purposeful. I am a flexible problem solver. Right? Because when I first met you, you weren't flexible. No, I wanted my way, my way only. And you would get upset if things didn't go a certain way.

And I'm like, that's not going to help you. I'm a flexible problem solver who treats myself and others with kindness and grace because that's who you are at your core. Yes. When you're frustrated, you could be snappy. I was very snappy. Yeah. I don't get upset until the 12th thing has gone wrong. I always run my mental program before each jump, record performance daily, and rehearse the experience of being in the

olympics yeah and run each jump flawlessly yes so we had you make your highlight reel yes and you watched it it was my watch your failures i want you to watch your successes yeah and there's so many yeah um train five days a week five hours day. I do strength training on a regular basis. Take my supplements. I read my elite brain affirmation daily. And then you repeat the goal. I am a world-class, charismatic Paul Valter who will compete for an Olympic gold medal in 2024. And you actualized it. Isn't that wild? And that's where we talk about the manifestation. You can manifest all what you want to do in life, but I think it's so important to have you actualized it. Isn't that wild? And that's where we talk about the manifestation. You know, you can manifest all what you want to do in life, but I think it's so important to have a plan, a goal, and then actually live by it. What you believe every day is what you need to live by.

And then we did another one right before the Olympics. Changed it just a little bit. Mm-hmm. We did a hypnotic meditation, a peak performance meditation. Yes, this was a very beautiful gift you gave me too because this was amazing because I had a voiceover of you reading me one and I would fall asleep to it every night. And because of you, we're here. I think this is so important. And it's okay in your Olympic year to focus on yourself.

Yeah. It's like, no, this is okay. Yeah, I think when we laugh about it, I called it the selfish era. And it wasn't for to be mean or disrespectful to anybody, but it was I'm going to come first above anyone that comes into my life. And it was a time I really needed to give myself the okay to be doing that. Some people I've lost friendships over and some people I've strengthened because they're like, wow, you set a boundary. Like that's incredible. Like how do I do that?

And so it's been really fun for me to learn these boundaries when I want to accomplish something, you know? We teach people how to treat us by what we tolerate. Yes. Yeah. Yes. And we turn things around a lot. Like if the girls are negative, that's my competitive advantage. If the wind is strong, I'm strong.

That's my competitive advantage. Yeah. And then I remember Jake and his mom said, you're a lot. And that really upsets you. So bad. And then I told you this story about Chloe, my daughter, who is a hostess at a restaurant and this Russian guy comes up to her. He's terribly rude.

I want to see. And she goes, no, we don't have room for you. You have to sit and wait. Yeah. And in front of her manager, he said, she's a bitch. Yeah. And Chloe looked at the manager and said, he's not wrong. And owned it.

And that changed my life. And when somebody says you're a lot, you are a lot. Yes, right. I am a lot in the most beautiful way because it's who i am i did a podcast with this um dennis prager's group yes and they sent out a reel yeah and she says to me she says um many in the psychiatric community say you're dangerous. And I'm like, I am dangerous to them. Yeah, be careful. Because we're going to completely change the paradigm.

So owning. Yes, was a huge thing for me. Rather than getting hurt by it or getting defensive by it. The fact is, anybody that's going to be with you. Yes. They have to be with you they have to be strong. They have to be very mentally strong. Because you're never going to diminish your

presence to be with another person. Never. Because you just wouldn't be happy being someone you're not. No, no. You'll be miserable and then you'll torture them. Yes. That's true. And then it wouldn't be good for either of us. That's actually so true. So you have goals for your relationships, for work.

And I love this, do my best as Olympic pole vaulter with joy, swagger. Yeah. Defying gravity. Open a clinic. Yes. But at the Olympics. Yeah. In the most stressful time nearly in your life. Yeah. You're smiling. You're having fun.

Yeah. You're playing with the crowd. You know, at 490, you miss just by a little bit. And when you landed on the mat, you go like this. People love you. Yeah. a little bit when you landed on the mat you go like this people love yeah you yeah because you brought your best self yeah to that moment and i think that's what was really cool it wasn't i wasn't like acting it was like how i felt because i was saying i hadn't watched the jumps since because the broadcasting rights you lose it in in Europe. So I went home after the Olympics and I watched it.

And I was like, oh my gosh, Alicia, like you are so like emotional everywhere. And it's just, it's so crazy that happened that way. I didn't realize how much reaction was on my face during the whole competition. And then money. Yes. And physical, you want to live to 101 yes with your brain intact yes 101 and then i'm good emotional have options and be positive hopeful graceful peaceful yes and to forgive yourself yes and being. And give back to others. Yeah, I felt like that was a big thing for me.

Giving back for some reason really fills me in ways like pole vault fills me. And I think that that's a passion project of mine coming up. Obviously, building that facility is one of my key things I'm doing. So if you want to be, what is happy for a day go fishing yes and be happy for a year win the lottery if you want to be happy for a lifetime help others yes that kind of energy so when i first saw you i mean obviously long history of success in track and field the concussion the anxiety becoming unmanageable, neck pain, headaches. Yes. Try different antidepressants.

Well, patron, helpful. Yeah. Sirtraline, duloxetine, trimipramine. Yeah. None of them helpful. Yeah. Seeing a therapist and trauma from a relationship in the past, trauma from the Olympics, light sensitive.

So I picked up on this thing called the Orlin syndrome, and you were depressed. And if we look at scans, so here's healthy, this outside surface on the left active scan on the right we look at yours yeah and your outside surface scan actually looked pretty good yeah little bumpy yeah probably the alcohol yeah but your active scan is crazy on fire, especially right here, which is an area called the left insula and left temporal lobe. And it's one of the pain circuits.

And you're a bit rigid and very anxious. And I'm like, oh, we have to calm that down. But when I saw that, I'm like oh we have to calm that down but when I saw that I'm like she has Erlen syndrome yeah and so we then scanned you again a couple of months later with using the lenses yeah and everything calmed down everything went a little too much everything was a walking zombie but then here i could see the concussion yes that it affected both your temporal lobes yeah now since then you've done hyperbaric oxygen yeah we've done 40 sessions of emdr you've eaten better yeah and here's your scan today. Wow. You have a beautiful brain. This spot, it's still there, but it's way less than before.

Yeah, it doesn't look as much. I still think you probably should wear the glasses or figure out with Helen how you can get contacts that actually work for you. Yeah. Because I think that might be a difference of 15 centimeters. I'll take it. And, you know, that level put you is one of the best of all time. Yeah. Right?

Yeah. So, but I'm very happy we can look at how active it was yeah the first time yeah this is wild and things are calmer yeah even the bumpy is wild um i still want you in the chamber some more yeah this could be okay a little bit fuller, right? But your brain is clearly healthier, going in the right direction. I love that. But I don't want you to think you're done. I want you to let go.

I was going to ask you that with my question. What's next for you and me? Oh, I think you're stuck with me for a while. Yeah. So I am so excited to keep working with you and to see you in Los Angeles. Yes. I told you you're stuck with me for life. And one of your missions, your purpose, is to inspire the next generation. How can you do that? Well, I think the first thing, the first action is obviously leading and being what I've done, showing Canadian female pole

vaulters that they can do it too. I think that was my first step. I think now going to my second step is to live with an example by example. And that's for me to show all the athletes that it doesn't matter where you come from, you can accomplish these ultimate highest goals that you ever have, which is most likely an Olympic medal. And then now providing a facility where they feel safe, they feel comfortable, where there is knowledgeable coaches and staff and people that are willing to help amateur athletes, this facility is going to be a gateway for them to get a head start on any athlete in the world because I'm the one that's going to be leading it. So I would say if there's something I could tell the younger self and I could tell the next generation

of athletes is to always believe in their gut feeling to always make sure they're protecting themselves and at the end of the day no no goal is too big to accomplish thank you for watching. Please subscribe to the podcast. Leave us a great review if you loved it. Yes. We love your questions. And you can follow Tana and I on social media, Tana Amon or Doc underscore Amon on Instagram, Doc Amon on TikTok. They can also follow you. Yes. Where can they follow you. Yes.

Where can they follow you? Easy, just add Alicia Newman. Very straightforward. Add Alicia Newman. Yep. Thanks, everybody. Thank you.