Change Your Brain Every Day - Health Strategies: Rewrite Your Story

Episode Date: January 24, 2019

To wrap up this series on happiness, Dr. Daniel Amen and Tana Amen introduce a new strategy, that when followed can dramatically change your life. The strategy is centered around a process that involves taking inventory of your life’s history, assessing how your actions have historically brought you closer or further from your goals, and then making the necessary adjustments to you’re your way towards a happy ending.

Welcome to the Brain Warriors Way podcast. I'm Dr. Daniel Amen. And I'm Tana Amen. Here we teach you how to win the fight for your brain to defeat anxiety, depression, memory loss, ADHD, and addictions. The Brain Warriors Way podcast is brought to you by Amen Clinics, where we've transformed lives for three decades using brain spec imaging to better target treatment and natural ways to heal the brain. For more information, visit amenclinics.com.

The Brain Warriors Way podcast is also brought to you by BrainMD, where we produce the highest quality nutraceutical products to support the health of your brain and body. For more information, visit brainmdhealth.com. Welcome to the Brain Warriors Way podcast. Welcome back. We're in happiness week and talking about the habits of happiness. That'll make a great book. One of the things that clearly makes us happy is when you leave reviews. This is from a firm believer all the way. And the title is one of the only wars really worth fighting. I so agree with that. I listened to most of the original presentations of The Brain Warrior's Way,

which started in the summer, I guess, of 2016 and went through the fall. However, then I had to work, change schedule, and it was hard to fit in all of the remaining ones. I'd listened to the audio book of Change Your Brain, Change Your Life several times. Thank you. So I didn't feel at a complete loss. What I really like now with the podcast is that they are 15 minute

segments of time rather than one hour giving the meat and potatoes of the presentation, if you will, which is easier to fit into a busy schedule. Thank you for that. I also like that you can pick up and choose a title that is pertinent to what you want or need to hear at any time. Excellent content with abbreviated presentation. Thank you so much. I would like to add retrospectively months later, I am totally a brain warrior. I'm an RN and am ready to take the next step and sign up for the brain warrior, the brain health coaching course.

I love that. So thank you so much. Thank you. We are in the habits of happiness. Yes. And one of the most important strategies you can do that will radically change the trajectory of your life is to rewrite your life story. I love this. And we've been working really hard with our nieces on this and actually my sister.

And this has been so powerful that they don't have to stay on the same path they've been on that has been so destructive for them, that it's their choice now to decide to rewrite that ending. So what was your life story when you were a child? Well, I've told it. It was a mess. I've told it. What were some of the messages that you got as a child? Oh, dear.

Well, college wasn't really in the cards. Medical school wasn't in the cards at all. And I wanted to go to medical school. And so that kind of, I remember hearing things about that. No, go earlier than that. When you were seven, eight, nine. Yeah. No, those were stories I always heard.

School's too expensive. So, but I would hear things like, so my mom, who worked like repeatedly, I'd hear weird messages. Never depend on a man. So how are we supposed to have like a really good relationship with somebody, right? Never depend on a man to take care of you. So that was one. And she's very successful, by the way. She was a 16-year-old runaway.

So if you understand the context. Right, but we're talking about the messages. So that's the message, right? So never depend on a man. Then there were chaotic relationships nonstop that went along with that. So that was one of them. Let's see. Gosh.

So when you were having the anxiety stuff when you were nine, it's people abandon you. Oh, yeah. Yeah, I thought that I couldn't trust anybody. So I just started thinking. I used to visualize what I would do if I found out that my parents were dead was pretty horrible, but I would visualize, okay, what would be the first thing I would do? Then what would be the second thing I would do? I would go pack my stuff.

You know, I actually had that same one. So I wonder if it's not an uncommon. Oh, you did? Yeah. Oh, weird. Yeah. And I used to visualize it so that I could survive it because I was so terrified. Yeah. Oh, weird. Yeah. I used to visualize it so that I could survive it because I was so terrified. Yeah.

Yeah. There were a lot of weird messages growing up. Oh. Well, and when you're one of seven, it's you're invisible. So that was one of mine, is you're invisible. Are we talking about messages that other people give you or just things you – Oh, the ones that I sort of – The things that you took from sort of, that I took in. Okay. Okay. That's different. That is different. Um, yeah, no, I began to quickly early on believe that men were not trustworthy. Yeah, no, no question.

That was, that was, um, that was something I began to believe early on. I also began to believe that you had to fight. Like, life, you had to fight to survive. So for those of you listening, I want you to think of when you were young and what was the story you were writing for yourself. What was the beginning of the book? Yeah, mine was like fight or die, basically. How you began to predict how that book would turn out,

whether I'm weak, I'm small, I'm insignificant, I'm not important. because sometimes those early story messages can impact the rest of your life. And what we want to do to end happiness week is to get you to rewrite the story. Yeah. So how do you want it to be? And does your behavior match the story from your childhood? Or does it match your hero's journey? Well, and sometimes... Because listening to the reviews that we've done, clearly your journey shifted.

Oh, for sure. From being weak and not powerful to be a healer and a teacher. Right. So I also think that, so I grew up in an environment where I did, I was very timid. I was very sort of weak as a child. That's how I felt. I felt like I was sort of in the way, so I'd hide, if you will.

I would sort of like stay in the shadows. And then out of necessity, that wasn't working out so well. So to protect myself, I started learning how to fight back. And then there was this sort of like fight or die type of mentality. But that was too scary to give up, the fight or die thing. But what I did learn how to do in writing my own ending was channel that in a more positive direction. So that's why the warrior mentality, right? So it's not fight or die like in a really negative way, but rather, okay, I channeled with martial arts and with like, okay, warrior mentality. How do warriors, you know, it's, it's, it's prepare, be aware, avoid.

That's what you do as a warrior, right? It's not just like charge in, right. And just fight someone because, so it was a much more positive way that I started to channel my energy. It was with intention. So how can we help people do this for themselves? So one of the exercises I do with my patients is I actually do sort of a year-by-year history. What were the significant things that happened in your life before you were born that you know about? Year one, all the way through however old you are.

And it takes a couple of hours to do, but you really begin to understand why people do what they do. And then we'll continue it on year by year. Well, how do you want your life to be? What are the things you want for yourself? And it's very powerful if you begin to rewrite your story of what you want, because ultimately it's up to us, right? I mean, in all movies, there's always twists and turns. There's always going to be twists and turns to your life. But as Tana always says, responsibility doesn't mean the twists and turns are your fault.

But it's your ability to respond that decides whether your story turns out awesome or awful. Right. And we never, brain warriors are not victims. Mm-mm. Brain warriors are victorious. Now, and it doesn't mean brain warriors don't make mistakes. They make mistakes

all the time. They just don't make the same ones over and over again because they're paying attention to the mistakes that they make. Right. So how do you want your story to turn out? Well, my story right now is awesome.

So I just want it to continue the way it is. And I want you to be in it with me until the end. So I want it to be purposeful and loving and kind. And I want little grandbabies. And I like my life. My life's amazing. Okay. So what do you have to do?

So when you're listening to this, I want you to answer these same questions. What do you have to do to make it that way? Be loving and kind. Be purposeful doing what I do with you. Invest in my relationships. I like the question, then what? If I do this, then what? Does it fit the goal you have with your life? That's what the front part of your brain does. It helps you decide if this helps you or will it hurt you. Right. And that's why even when I'm not feeling well, what first thing I did was go get numbers checked and figure out, you know,

so because then what? If I don't do this, then what? So know your story and rewrite it the way you want it to be and then match your behavior over time to get what you want. Use the code podcast10 to get a 10% discount on a full evaluation at amenclinics.com or on our supplements at brainmdhealth.com. Thank you for listening to the Brain Warriors Way podcast. Go to iTunes and leave a review and you'll automatically be entered into a drawing to get a free signed copy of the Brain Warriors Way and the Brain Warriors Way cookbook we give away every month.