Change Your Brain Every Day - The Miracle of Purpose with Kelli Davis

Episode Date: June 24, 2019

Miracles occur every day. Some are major life changes, while others are smaller and may even go unnoticed at first. Learning to recognize life’s miracles and use them to bring purpose in your life can be one of the most efficient paths towards a fulfilled life. In this week’s series of The Brain Warrior’s Way Podcast, Dr. Daniel Amen and Tana Amen are joined by Kelli Davis from the Children’s Miracle Network to discuss miracles and giving. This episode focuses on how charity can give your life purpose.

Welcome to the Brain Warriors Way podcast. I'm Dr. Daniel Amen. And I'm Tana Amen. In our podcast, we provide you with the tools you need to become a warrior for the health of your brain and body. The Brain Warriors Way podcast is brought to you by Amen Clinics, where we have been transforming lives for 30 years using tools like brain spec imaging to personalize treatment to your brain. For more information, visit amenclinics.com. The Brain Warriors Way podcast is also brought to you by BrainMD, where we produce the highest quality nutraceuticals to support the health of your brain and body. To learn more, go to brainmd.com. Hey, everybody. Welcome to the Brain Warriors Way podcast. This is the Brain on Giving Week, and we have a very special guest, Kelly Davis. She's the head of Celebrity relations for Children's Miracle Network hospitals where

she works closely with some fascinating celebrities to raise funds and awareness for 10 million kids each year at 170 children's hospitals across North America she's a motivational speaker author and host of the untold miracles podcast where she interviews celebrities to discuss miracles in their life her website book kellydavis.com also for the past 25 years she shared that she's lived, like many of the people listen to the podcast and many of the people here, like you and me, with anxiety, depression, addiction, low self-esteem, and to find healing and relief, embarked on an incredible journey where she's just immersed herself. So we are so grateful, Kelly, to have you with us. Yes, welcome. Thank you. I'm so honored

to be here today and really look forward to our conversation. So we met at the Paul Mitchell fundraiser. They have a foundation, the Andrew Gomez Dream Foundation that has actually helped to support our foundation, which is called End Mental Illness Now. What they do is very special. It's very cool. So how long have you been with the Children's Miracle Network? You know, it's an interesting story. I actually, when I graduated from college in 1995, I was able to live my dream job to work for the Denver Broncos. And in 1996, Children's Miracle Network Hospitals called me up and said, we want to fly you out for a job interview.

And I was at my dream job. And I'm like, do I want to help people watch a football game or help save kids' lives? So I started 23 years ago. And I have witnessed and helped been a part of creating miracles for millions and millions of kids. And it's the biggest blessing that I have to work for this organization because truly we save kids' lives. We raise money, as you mentioned, for 170 children's hospitals. We've raised $7 billion in the last 36 years. Billion? $7 billion with a B. We started in 1983, Marie Osmond and John Schneider were our co-founders

and they wanted to start a charity that helped all kids, not just kids with cancer, muscular dystrophy. And what really makes us unique is all of the money we've raised stays in the local community. So in Orange County, if you donated a dollar at Walmart, it would benefit Children's Hospital of Orange County. So it's really fun to be a part of this. And the best part of my job is I get to meet these amazing kids who shouldn't be alive today, but they are because miracles are real. When we saw you at the Paul Mitchell event, you had a couple of those kids with you.

Those stories were... These kids are really just functioning in normal life today. I was mind blown at the transformation and what they're able to do, how they get to live their lives in a way that they never would be able to. And so it was just really special to see these kids just transformed and being able to live, like just live and where, you know, they would not have been able to, it was really crazy. So let me just take a step back and talk about the brain, because that's why people listen to our podcast. That the brain is ultimately a meaning machine. It looks to create meaning.

Right. And we've talked many times on the podcast about people who are purposeful live longer. And so if you give the brain something important to develop meaning around, it actually keeps it healthier. And we wear out our pleasure centers with all sorts of negative things whether it's social media or bad food many different kinds of addiction but being purposeful actually brings pleasure to the brain and helps keep it healthy so kelly in in looking, and I love your story about working at the Denver Broncos. So here at Amen Clinics, we did the world's first and largest study on active and retired NFL players. And there's just no question, football's a brain damaging sport. So from going to support that, to support miracles, how exciting is that?

So what are some of the principles you've learned of raising awareness to do this really great work? What are some of the important things you can share with our listeners? Oh gosh. Well, I would just say that in my 23 years, I have learned that the principle is that it's never about you. It's always about others and what you can do to make a difference in someone's life. Because when we wake up, it should be, who can I serve today? Who can I help today? And that's what I get to do on a daily basis

is how many kids' lives can we save today? And so that's a big principle for me is putting others first. Not all the time, but in this case, like it's really about how many kids can we save? That's so awesome. So for me, I have relationships with celebrities all over the country. And my goal is how can I use those celebrity relationships to create a miracle in the life of a sick kid?

And that is why I wake up every day. That is my purpose is how can I help a sick child have a better day today? That's amazing. A lot of fun doing it because celebrities love giving back. And so I can tell you story after story after story of different connections that have come together because I want to make people struggle or suffer less because my suffering has been great. As you mentioned about 1998, I got diagnosed with depression and I have severe anxiety and depression and body dysmorphic disorder and suicidal thoughts. And I deal with this on a daily basis every day.

It doesn't go away, but I choose to show up every day. These kids have taught me how to get out of bed no matter what. So even though this is here, right here, every day, I focus on, you know what? I can do this because I'm going to choose to get up today. I'm going to choose to show up because I get to choose that. Even though I have this going on right here, I choose it every day. You bring up such a good point. I just have to touch on that. Because we often say one of the best ways to feel better fast is to help other people when you feel terrible. And I know there are going to be times in our lives when we need to be on the receiving end of giving, right? There's just going to be times in our lives

when we're not in that place to give. We need to actually receive someone's help and that's okay. It's sort of like Maslow's hierarchy of needs, right? Your needs need to be met. You can't be in a place of giving if you're like desperate, you're not surviving. But once you get to that place, what I really love and what we often teach people is one of the best ways to feel better fast is if you can reach out. And once we get to that place, once our basic needs are met, there's no more fulfilling thing you can do or something that, that really makes you feel more complete and whole and just full than when you give back and you feel feel you see that just really making a difference in someone's life and in the world.

So let me add a piece that you may not know. So Maslow is very famous in psychology circles, and he came up with the hierarchy of needs. Viktor Frankl was in disagreement with Maslow that Viktor Frankl, who was in a Nazi concentration camp, said even when people's basic needs were not met, if they had purpose, they could do incredible things. Well, like you're talking about. You don't feel good many times. I've been in that same place. I know depression is a miserable thing. It was the only thing in my life that was worse than cancer. So I get it.

But when you show up and help other people, it sort of feeds your soul. It's just, it's a bomb. It's medicine. Yeah. Right. Giving, connection connection other people i feel like um it's it's really how i combat compression or depression on a daily basis yeah my whole life is giving and that's so special evil to deal with anxiety and depression is i actually gravitate

towards the sick at child because i know how deep they're suffering can be. That's so special. That's really special. I think that's part of why I became a nurse for a similar reason. Well, of course, my question is, has anybody looked at your brain to find out why it's torturing you? Right, right. Yeah, not yet.

You may need to visit us. We're going to invite you to come because the end of mental illness is really about these things aren't mental, they're brain. And when you balance your brain, you feel happier, you feel less anxious. If certain circuits in your brain work too hard, that you can't control it. And to call it a mental illness is actually wrong because it's brain and mental illness, the whole concept shames people. Thank you for correcting that for me. I appreciate that. So anyways, there's so much for us to talk about. Before we stop our first podcast, you're going to be with us all week. Um, do you have a story that just motivates you that makes you happy?

Uh, yes, I have probably a hundred that I could tell you, but can I just share a quick story about little boo? Uh, my buddy little boo is from Louisiana and when he was five years old, he got the H1N1 virus, which is the swine flu. Yeah. And he ended up spending 501 days at his local children's hospital. It just ravaged his entire body. Well, after he was able to get out of the hospital, when doctors said that he wouldn't, he ended up going on dialysis for three years and he would drive four hours to sit in a chair for four hours and drive back home. That was his childhood. Well, a couple of years ago, Little Boo was able to get a

successful kidney transplant from his mother. While Little Boo was in the hospital, he kept a journal of all the places he was going to eat from watching the TV show Diners, Drive-Ins, and Dives. So when I met Little Boo, I was just so blown away by his courage and his determination and his sweet spirit so I reached out to Meredith Vieira when she had her television show we brought boo to little new to New York and he comes into the studio and we surprise little boo with a cookbook and he's freaking out because it's Guy Fieri's cookbook and then Guy Fieri comes on TV and says, little boo, I heard that you love me and you're getting on a train right after the show

and coming to help me open my new restaurant. And so little boo got to go meet his little hero. And like, he shouldn't be alive today, but he is. And little boo is someone I think about every day when something is really hard and you don't think you're going to get through it, you have to believe and know and trust God and know that miracles are rare and not possible. And they happen every day, but they don't have to be big. They're little. The sun is shining today. That's a miracle. It's been raining here for three weeks in Salt Lake City. It's a miracle that I woke up today. Everything is a miracle. The breath of life is a miracle. Are we looking? Are we paying attention?

Are we being present? Because life is miraculous. You're going to make me cry. She's like, that's amazing. What are we going to do to create miracles for those around us today? That's so special. How can people learn more about the Children's Miracle Network Hospitals?

Well, you can go to cmnhospitals.org. And of course you can listen to our podcast, UntoldMiracles.org, where I interview celebrities and we talk about the miracles in their personal and professional life. But a lot of them have worked with CMN Hospitals. I want to repeat that because I want to make sure everyone hears it clearly. CMN, like Children's Miracle Network. You can follow us on Facebook at CMN Hospitals, on Instagram at CMN Hospitals. But yeah, it's truly, it's a network that is saving lives every day. And we just continue. Kids need care. Stay with us. We'll be back with Kelly Davis.

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