Chapo Trap House - 266 - Rod Friended Me (11/27/18)

Episode Date: November 27, 2018

In a triple-stuffed Chapo, we got: - A call from New York Governor Andrew Cuomo* - A look at our beloved friend Rod Dreher's porn collection - Another edition of Pre-Taped Call-In Show, featuring your calls to our special 1-800 number (1-800-420-LMAO**) *James Adomian **No, for real, call our number at: 1-800-583-1315

Hello, everybody. It's me, Will Menaker, here with your chapeau, and I'm kicking things off this week with a very special guest. This is a big get. It's the newly re-elected governor of New York State, Andrew Cuomo. Andrew, how you doing? That's right. It's Andrew M. Cuomo. I'm newly re-elected to the standard three terms that a successful governor of New York gets above and beyond the protestations of losers like you guys. Well, you know, I mean, I voted for the other guy, in this case, the other girl, but Mr. Cuomo- Oh, I know who I'm talking to. Let's not make any mistakes. I'm doing you a favor by coming on to set the record straight. You, DSA, Occupy Wall Street, Bernie Bro, Cynthia Nixon,

Bro Scumbags have tried to malign the record of me and my family when we're the ones getting the job done. And I hope that you're sucking on your 20% that you won in that last primary election. Really, really spiking the football, but Governor Cuomo, you've got cause to celebrate. You've brought Amazon's new headquarters right here to New York City, to the borough of Queens. Amazon is flying in. We're having a ribbon-cutting ceremony. Mr. Bezos is going to join us. We're flying the campus in with a series of quadcopters that are also purchased from Amazon.com as part of the deal. We're very happy. Everything in the ribbon-cutting, down to the ribbon end, as soon as it's going to be bought on Amazon.com, we are bringing billions and billions of jobs

to Amazon.com, which is now headquartered in New York City. Thanks to Governor Cuomo. Governor Cuomo, what are some of the features that this amazing state-of-the-art headquarter facility will feature? Well, yeah, it's nice of you to ask. All you guys have been ganging up, trying to say, oh, we're giving a billion dollars to Amazon this and that. Let me tell you, let me tell you how it works. When you get things done in this city, what you do is you sit down to Mr. Bezos face-to-face and you say, what do you want? And he gives you a list. Look, Long Island City is a neighborhood ripe for reinvestment. Let's put it that way. I got drunk and I went on Amazon.com and I started clicking around like anybody does when they feel like

making an impulse purchase for the holidays. And I clicked on, hey, how about reinvesting in an entire neighborhood in a major city? What do you know? It was available on Amazon.com. That's why they're winners. That's why I play with winners. And I clicked on it and they got a bunch of options. Hey, what do you want? What kind of neighborhood? A warehouse neighborhood, an upscale neighborhood, a downscale? You clip drop-down menu, Long Island City, bam, where they're delivering an Amazon headquarters next year, very soon. I mean, everyone knows about the tax breaks. But what are some of the other perks that you offered Mr. Bezos to attract him and Amazon here to New York State? Well, whatever he wanted. Look, people complained about the transit situation in New York City.

I railroaded over those people and Mr. Bezos sat down and what do you know? He offers a solution. I offer him a couple of things. We fixed it. We're going to have a separate Amazon train that runs from their campus parallel to the seven train. And it's not, we're not even going to build tracks for it. It's going to be drone power. And it's going to plow its way down Jackson Avenue, straight through Long Island City. And then it's going to plow through the water across the river into Manhattan. Anybody in the way is getting pulled over. Cuomo and Amazon, that's the team you got to get out of the way for. If you think it's not going to work, I suggest you look at the duck tours that they do in Seattle and several other successful capital city.

So, so a sort of an amphibious hydroplane Amazon train will be barreling across the east river. Yeah, they complain. So they look, these people, you look, you, you vegan socialist complaining fucks heckling me about the seven train this and that. Guess what? We're going to make the seven train harder to take. And we're going to force you on to an Amazon dot com Philip K Dick system of police, police contracted Amazon drones that will be plowing their way above, below and on the streets of Long Island City. Guess what's happening to the seven train? I'm going to make the weight longer on the seven train just to teach you fucks a lesson. And anybody who endorsed me in the last primary is going to be able to board the train. But Governor Cuomo, do you think there are

some legitimate objections that the people of Queens in the city about how this process was handled? Look, I suggest that any of you, any of you Rosa Luxemburg fucking losers, I want you to sit down and listen to how the game is played. Go put on, go to one of your record stores before they're gentrified out of the neighborhood and go buy yourself a Pink Floyd album on vinyl and go listen to a little track I like to play loud. Welcome to the machine. And to me, it's a celebration and affirmation of everything that my father Mario Cuomo did for this state in this city. Welcome, my son. Welcome to the machine. I'm going to do a cover song. Wow. I didn't know that song was about New York State Democratic politics. I made it about me and I've got my look. I'm putting

out a weird out yank of a cover. Governor Cuomo, do you think New York City Mayor Bill de Blasio deserves any credit for this this huge win? De Blasio deserves the credit that the little Muppet monster chained to job of the hut gets for all helping out getting putting Harrison Ford in carbonite. Sure, he was there. He was applauding. He was jumping up and down going. Yes, Mr. Governor sir and all that. Like he did his job. The mayor of New York serves the governor of New York. That's the feudal system. I don't know if you caught up. I say jump. He says how high and I slap him in his face. Now we all know New York City, you know, it's one of the greatest city in the world. People come from all over for our pizza, our bagels, you know, the Yankees.

And there's been a big gap. People aren't coming to Long Island City. It's a waste of space. They got a Pulaski Bridge. Half the time the drawbridge is up, letting boats through. Let me tell you, when Amazon's in, the drawbridge is always going to be up. The Amazon boats are going to be costuming in and out like a new fucking Navy in and out, in and out of the New Town Creek. Let me tell you something before this deal with Amazon.com Long Island City was a waste zone. It looked like a Mad Max waste zone. Empty warehouses, pimps, prostitutes, court-squared diner, people vomiting tuna outside of the court-squared diner. You had a place called the Creek and the Cave in Long Island City. What a dump. First of all, tell me, what does somebody

need at both the Creek and the Cave for? That's a danger to the water table, if you ask me. We have tried everything to push that place out of business. I think, finally, hopefully, Amazon and Bezos are going to help me knock them down. You're going to walk down Long Island City and immediately snapped up by a drone that says, buy something, fuckface. If you don't, you're not going to see your family again. Do you think that this Amazon HQ and your role in bringing it to New York will be a major feather in your cap when it comes time to- I think it's going to be a major motion picture. I think Leonardo DiCaprio is going to play the part of Andrew M. Cuomo. He needs, frankly, plastic surgery to make himself look handsome

and big cocked enough to pull the part off. I'd like to thank you once again, New York Governor Andrew Cuomo, real New York guy, real one of us. Hey, Chapo. Hey, Chapo, look over your shoulder. We got El Chapo. He's in the court right now. We're coming after his trap house next. Look over your shoulder, asshole. Do you think maybe there's a deal to be made to bring the Sinaloa cartel to another like maybe Bushwick or East New York? What I'm telling you is that your podcast has gotten away for a long time. We're going to start having regulations that come down on you. Pretty nice podcast. Be a real shame if somebody said that your pipes were out of water. It'd be a shame if something happened to this podcast. It's certainly true.

Yeah, the department of podcast and Amazon inspections. Look for it. That's next. All right. Governor Cuomo, thanks again for giving us some of your time. Welcome, my son. Welcome to the machine. Yeah. Governor Cuomo, thank you. Yeah, fuck you. All right. Thanks again to New York Governor Andrew Cuomo for stopping but in and letting us know about all the fun things that Amazon is going to bring to Long Island City and by extension, the state. So as you might be aware, in a little bit, we are going to hear from you, the listener, in another pre-recorded call-in show. We're interested in hearing from you, what's on your mind and just what's going on and are definitely not interested in just cheap

comedy material. I don't want you to get that impression. But before we get to that, I think we got to talk a little business. I think we got to check in with something that's come across the news transom that I think y'all are probably going to want to hear about. So let me begin by asking my co-host. Let me sketch a scenario for you. Imagine, if you will, that you are a teenage boy. You have unrestricted access to the internet. Let's say you're sitting in the family den looking at the laptop or home PC and you're on the internet. Let's say you want to look at a photo of Kate Upton because, you know, she's hot and apparently your cousin's had sex with her and you're interested in, you know, what that's like. You're looking at a picture of Kate Upton.

Let's say you click a little bit more. You're interested in what her boobs look like. Maybe you can't find pictures of her boobs, but maybe there are pictures of boobs out there. In fact, there are for sure pictures of boobs out there. Now you're looking at them. Now you're cruising. You've got to taste through it though. Let's say you click just a few more times. Let's say now you're watching pornography. You're watching two human adults have sex with one another. You keep clicking. The algorithm is taking control of you now. You're seeing lesbian stuff. You're seeing penetration. You're seeing double penetration. You're seeing ropes. You're seeing epic compilations of ropes. You're seeing it all. But let's say you just keep clicking.

Let's say within just a few clicks from seeing a glorious Peter North rope compilation, let's say you're watching forced feminization and hypnosis pornography and you yourself are beginning to become hypnotized and sysified in just basically 10 minutes from getting interested in seeing Kate Upton's boobs. Imagine you're that child. Fellows, don't you hate it when you're searching old relics and Catholic enchantments to get the demon out of your wife? And by the end of the afternoon, you've turned into a bimbo through your computer. Fellows, don't you hate when that happens? And of course, someone who hates when that happens

more than anything is Brother Rod Dreher, friend of the show. When last we checked on Rod, live on stage at Mr. Smalls in Pittsburgh, we were checking in on the amazing story of his friend's wife and her upcoming exorcism. Or rather, her ongoing demonic possession was really the nut of that story. But Rod is back today with another one that I think he's outdone himself on. Headline simply, have you heard of Sissy porn? Some people think there's a transgender connection. Maybe you don't want to know. The headline alone was enough to really grip me because it's just the equivalent of showing somebody your browser history and being like, yo, have you seen this shit? It's fucked. Yeah, this shit's weird. Those appear to be the only

websites you've ever visited. Yeah, I know. It's fucking weird. When I saw that headline from the American conservative, I was like, don't need any more coffee this morning. Well, it definitely logged in for the day. So Rod is, of course, responding to that big piece in the New York Times by Andrea Long Chu that a lot of people like, a lot of people are mad at. I'm not going to go into that now, but I'm really more interested in what Rod has to say about it all. And basically, he does the thing he does where he basically, he holds a flashlight under his chin as he's writing and he's like, readers, I cannot warn you in the strongest terms possible, I cannot warn you enough to avoid the incredibly explicit content that I'm now going to describe in full detail,

which he does go on to do. And Rod has discovered something called hypnoporn or ossessification or bimboefication, if you will. Will has been bimbofied momentarily. We would appreciate it. He is now, he's too stupid to operate a computer. Okay, so we get around his giant boobs. Yeah, his big boobs are hitting the keyboard. Oh my. Okay, so he discovers a genre of porn called forced feminization through Andrea Chu, who wrote in like an old paper or something. She describes this phenomenon. Yeah, I like how there was this big article with like a big controversy that Rod, like, it was easy for social conservatives to get into it and like just, you know, do a bad faith reading

of a choose article and be like, yo, trans people are fucking weird. But Rod, like Rod showing that he's not like just a no talent, like fucking Eric Erickson is like, hold up, give me a second. And like looks for an old Andrea Long Chu essay and he's like, okay, bimbofication, give me that. That's what I want to talk about. Yeah, he did his work. It said on Chu's website, he posts a PDF link. That's, I'm reading Rod here. He's intentionally misgendering this person. But they post a PDF link to a paper they delivered this year at Columbia University conference. And so he's literally reading college papers from Andrea Chu. He is the best. The papers title comes from a comment Chu saw on an online forum. Sissy porn,

we learned from the paper, is a genre in which submissive men are forced to have sex with other men in such a way that their masculinity is forcibly taken from them. Chu says this genre is also called forced feminization porn. Chu says that Sissy porn explicitly intends to turn male viewers into transsexuals, in part by instructing them to understand their addiction to the genre as constitutive of their own feminization. In the paper, Chu interviews one person who writes, about three years ago, I discovered Sissy hypno videos. That's hypno, like short for hypnotism, which in a nutshell are flashing subjective images telling you to wear panties, be girly, and even take hormones. I became completely obsessed with these videos. This is where Rod cuts in now.

Now imagine a confused 12 year old boy, perhaps one experiencing same sex desires, finding Sissy porn on his smartphone and giving himself over to it. It's only a few clicks away. Imagine that. It's just a click away. Dude, I don't want to think about these 12 year olds becoming big, busty bimbos, but I have to. It's my job. It's what this magazine pays me to do. To think about innocent children being turned into missing bimbos by the computer. Look, I'm missing the turnip harvest here at the compound because I have to write about the sexy bimbo 12 year old. Now, I don't want to think about a sixth grader becoming Dolly Parton in nine to five, but I have to. If I don't think about it, no one else will. Of course, it wouldn't be

a Rod column in which there wasn't a incredibly long reader email. I bet these are, they have a very balanced view of the bimbification Sissy porn issue. I've read a lot of demagoguery on both sides. Well, I mean, again, like all of Rod's readers, they seem to have a very similar writing style and point of view to Rod. I don't know. I think that's a little bit different. Every one of Rod's readers seems like Martin Scorsese in the back of the cab and taxi driver. So okay, this is the Rod's reader now and he says, read this comment. Do you let your kid have a smartphone smartphone and or unsupervised internet access? You might want to rethink that. Well, I mean, yes, the reader. Your brain child's brain will be putting in ten minutes. Ask Felix. I don't know,

dude. I'm standing in front of you. I'm probably the member of the show least likely to be turned into a bimbo. But the member of the show that most of our listeners want most turned into a bimbo. Well, that's true. But I'd be like, it's interesting. It'd be easy to turn you guys into bimbos, but I'd probably be the sexiest bimbo. Like if we're being honest, I'm sure we'll be. I'm sure no one will attempt to, you know, resolve that. They've already used face abs. It's fine, dude. The next step is just turning me into a bimbo and honestly, new year, new me. Okay. So this is Rod's reader email. The third update really struck a chord with me. I am familiar with Sissy porn having discovered it in high school.

Dear Rod, I am taking my gun with the old testament etched into it out of my mouth to write you this. And it's much broader than what she was referring to some background on me. I am a millennial. I was raised Catholic and I first discovered internet porn at a friend's house when I was 12 years old. When I was in high school and we first got internet access at home, I used it to look for porn when no one was around. In the first few years, I had pretty typical straight teenage boy interests when it came to porn. Having been poorly formed in male-female dynamics, however, I was very interested in having power over women. And this led me to search for hypnosis. Since this was a very small niche back then, I absorbed whatever material I could find

within a few months. This led me to the sight of a woman who specialized in hypnotizing men and making them think they were women. Although the latter part just seemed gross, as I had no interest in being a woman, something about the power exchange appealed to me, even though it never did before. I have a theory that this is a pattern for frequent porn users. They may initially look for other things, but with enough exposure, they desire to become a passive sexual participant since it involves less effort on their part. He goes on, he goes, despite the feminization aspect, I kept going down this rabbit hole as the thought of being the submissive one was appealing. So I did my best to avoid the sissy

stuff at first, reading stories, downloading audios, and later watching videos where women claimed to hypnotize men. Just a PSA for the listener, you cannot be hypnotized into doing anything that you wouldn't otherwise already do. You can't change someone's fundamental moral core or identity through hypnosis, just a warning there. In case anyone tries to hypnotize you and to commit a murder, if in fact you do it, you will be guilty of murder. Yeah, and if the cop has to tell you that they'll stop or else. Now, ladies and gentlemen of the jury, I do believe that an individual was murdered here, but how could my client, who you see in front of you, who is a swaggering membo with heaving

triple G bosoms, have committed the murder when our witnesses describe a regular man as doing it. That's our new legal thriller, writing with John Grisham. It's about a guy who gets out of a murder conviction by turning into a sexy bimbo. Now, I may be a sysified country lawyer. Yeah, it's going to be great. It's called Double D Jeopardy. So it goes on. By the time I reached my 20s, I was in deep. Later in my 20s, I also discovered the free streaming porn sites and I was eager to see what content I could find on them. I bet you were. The discovery of these videos led me to reflect on how big my problem had become.

It goes on and on and on. And then he goes, I don't know. When does he become a bimbo? He never? Well, he never gets to the bimbo factory. Rod is reading this just with his dick out. He's like, oh my God, hurry up. Get to the bimbo vacation. The long story short, he never becomes bimbo or trans. And he says it was because he returned to the Catholic Church. Now he has a wife and two children that he's very happy with. Now I am the bimbo for God. He's salutations. So basically the main problem he points out is not enough porn about men hypnotizing women. If there'd been a little broader array for him to choose from, he wouldn't have been forced to go down these perverted rabbit holes and find the

other one. I mean, where this letter of strange credulity is not that this guy found himself going down a rabbit hole and discovering some weird kink or sexual interest he wouldn't otherwise have discovered through pornography. What strange credulity is that he's like, but yeah, definitely. Then I got back with the Catholic Church, got a wife and two kids, and I'm normal now. Totally normal. Totally normal. 100% normal. Yeah, I just jack off to normal shit like women baking cookies, that type of thing. Yeah, I just, I bait, I bait to Norman Rockwell paintings nowadays. He goes, I don't, he writes, I don't know who's making all of this stuff. But with all the videos and message board posts, there is an awful lot of content being

produced that seems designed to reach lonely young men and recruit them into the ranks of the transsexual community. Oh my God. Guys, now that Tim Miller is no longer with crooked media, do you think deciders is working on bimbifying young men? Or do you think deciders can get to the bottom of it and figure out that Soros is bimbifying our military aged men? Oh my God. He closes by saying, Tim, we need you. I am fortunate that I rediscovered my faith in adulthood and got my act together. I have since married and I'm raising children with my wife. And by two huge kids, who is not my wife, who has not been hypnotized. It still haunts me to think how differently things may have gone for me. And I pray regularly for boys and young men who took

the other path, the other path here becoming, becoming, becoming, becoming just like a huge sort of like, uh, like serving frow at an October fest, just wearing later hosin with huge pigtails and just huge bosoms and freckled cheeks. And, um, at least that's what I'm thinking. Dear Rod, I am now normal. I'm now a member of Opus Day who dug up his mom's skeleton and now worships it. Rod closes by saying, of course he does. What is described here is the process of demonic possession. Oh, I knew it. Rod, you've used that one like a million. Yeah. That's like it sounds like I'm joking, but I'm not. Like it's literally like there are like 10 articles off the top of my head where Rod will see like, it's like, it's just something like it's like an

online pop-up ad for like a mortgage, but there's a trans woman and Rod's like, fucking demons, I told you. It's like, you can't always use that one. The first time you did it, I was like, wow, that's a new one. But like, you can't just say everything's demonic possession. This is also just a retread horror movie plot from the early aughts. What if the devil was in the computer? That's all it is. Movie called like evil.com or something. Yeah. I mean, how about like a new one? Like how about it's the book of Job and God is like making individual prop bets with the devil over who will become a bimbo? Have you thought of that one? I'm just like workshopping here. It's not that I think you suck. I just think that you're phoning this one.

I love the early seasons of Rod because the endings weren't always that predictable. It wasn't always a demon. Sometimes it would be a mummy. Sometimes it would be a Dracula. Sometimes even a Frankenstein. Now it's like demon, demon, demon. Is that what people want? Oh, man. I keep getting, I keep seeing these toxic messages from Rod Dreher fans who are mad he's being recast as a bimbo. Oh, man. I'm just, I'm just imagining like Rod for research, watching all of the hypnoporn. Yeah. Like fucking like the parallax view or something, except this all just like. His breasts are just growing slowly. I think Rod needs to dedicate himself full time to fighting the trans, hypno, bimbo, sissy porn menace. And by that I mean watch like every one of these videos

that has ever been made just to prove that it doesn't work or that you can overcome the hypnosis. And help produce a wider variety of straight porn so that guys don't end up going down these awful, you know, crooked run roads. Instead, they could just stay on the nice, fat runway of femdom and male dom and, and piss play. Pizza delivery guy. Pizza delivery guys. All the good classic meat and potatoes pornography. Fucking your step mom. Of course. Hey kids. Hey kids. You don't have to go outside and get hypnotized by some weirdo and turned into a woman. Just fuck your step sister. She's right there. So that is our check in on the the Rodger universe. Do you think like by the end of I'm not going to be creating and say by the end of 2018,

but like by the end of 2019, we will have gotten like an overlap. There will be contact between Rodger and Riley Reed. My keyboard. Riley Reed to make normal porn for Catholic men. And she is a fan of Jordan Peterson. Maybe he could introduce them. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know, man. I there's so many like crossovers we never expected. And I feel like this is the next logical one. It's sort of like it's a screwball comedy. Rod and Riley Reed. Rod is becomes one of those reply guys to porn stars. And they're like, Rod, you have to understand. I don't know when my next bimbo vacation video is coming out. Can we just get them on a road trip? Maybe to AVN, you know, they got to get there. They're in New York. They got to get to Vegas in three days. I'd watch that.

Well, Godspeed, Rod. We're all praying for Rod speed. And again, Rod, if you're listening, please, please update us on what happened with your friend's wife and her demonic possession. Yeah, you can't just leave that out there. Be like, oh, yeah. Haven't having a exorcism at 330. You got to follow up. Well, this is this is what I like about the Rod show is that it's similar to the Sopranos, right? Like they're all these huge spotlights and they just started. They never get tied up and that's realistic. Like things in real life. This is David Chase's finest work because sometimes they're just loose ends out there. Like is that woman's demon OK? Is she OK? And it's this has become the dominant storyline of Rod season six. Friended by Rod.

Rod friended me. Not bad. I wish I could even follow Rod. I can't. Yeah, me there sucks, dude. Tone. Tone. You ever having a kid? It became scissified. Tone. It's all messed up. Terrible. I could definitely see AJ getting good profiles off. All right. We can't dwell too long on Rod because like I said, we need to hear from you guys. We're all way too horny right now. Yeah. I need to stop thinking about this or else I may think about it too much. My fingers may start, you know, typing into the old Google. It's better for porn just so everyone knows. Thank you. What's up? Thank you, Bill Gates. All right. So as you may have seen, we now have a voicemail box that anyone can call to abuse us. Yeah, exactly. We thought this would just make the

abuse more efficient to streamline the whole process. And we're going to do a pre-tipped call-in show. A lot of you guys called. Thank you to everyone who left us your thoughts and comments. We actually did listen to all of them, but unfortunately we can't get to all of them. So Chris and I have curated a selection that I think you guys will enjoy and I think we will enjoy. So why don't we get into hearing from you, the listener, in the chapeau suggestion box. Let's have a little chapeau suggestion box music. All right. You guys ready to take some calls? Some pre-recorded calls? I'm ready. My body is ready. Let's do it. Okay. First one. Hi. I just wanted to ask the chapeau team, what's your favorite episode of This Is Us? This is specifically

aimed at Felix, but I'd like to hear everyone's response. Oh my, don't even get me started. I've watched every episode of This Is Us three times. You know, the fucking episode, remember when TJ and Sarah were like, oh no, we want to send our kid to camp, but we don't have the money because we got to get our car fixed. And then Sarah happened to meet Craig at the coffee shop by random chance. And you know, when fucking, when Gavin came in the mix, I was like, this is, this is us. This is everything we love about the show. This is us. And I mean, I can't really pick a favorite episode because every episode is just, it's us, man. That's what I love about it. Hey, we should call this show This Is Sus.

I like the episode where the Sterling K. Brown character has to tell the Milo Vente Lalamiglia character that he has non-celiac gluten allergy. That was, that was some us. This shit is us though. I'm smoking on that. This is us. You know, you guys are making fun of it, but it is the only hour long show on network television that is not about a cop or a doctor. So or a lawyer or a lawyer. Those are usually cop lawyers. Yeah. So, you know, give it that, at least I don't know what their jobs are. They all looks like they all work in a crate and barrel together, but I don't know. I've never watched it. You're bounty hunters, dude. That's pretty cool. Every episode, they have to track down a new bounty head. All right. And then they

say the cast phrase, you're one of us now in the prison system. Sounds pretty cool. I like the, I like the one that's just an hour long silent video of American war crimes. Your body's piling up with the, with the caption, this is us. That really was the best episode. All right. Next question. Hey there, Chapo. I was just wondering now that Kanye has cut ties and returned to the Democrat plantation, who is the next influencer that you would really want to see have a meeting of the minds with Trump? Good question. I mean, the easy answer for me is, of course, Stephen Segal and the most realistic level of pot, like the highest level of possibility of it actually happening. Like good chance it may happen before the end of 2019. Well, he's already

pro-Trump. That's not a question. He just hasn't met him. Wasn't there going to be a meeting because he's now the Russian at large cultural ambassador? He is. So there's a good chance that that will actually happen. However, in the spirit of this question, I'd like to, like that's kind of an easy answer. So is there someone on the level of, like Kanye's level of influence or fame that you think would make for an amazing meeting of the minds? Yeah, I got one. Alex Trebek, because the cheeto in chief needs to get a clue. Oh yeah. Donald Trump, you're not going to win any money, but with Robert Mueller, you are in jeopardy. I do, I do have one that I think it's not on quite on Kanye's level, not yet. People haven't caught on quite yet to that level,

but I think it's realistic. And I think that it would be an interesting synergy of brain types. And of course I'm referring to Jax Taylor, the Vanderpump rules. Yes, yes. I co-signed that entirely. Jax Taylor has like the most powerful dumb guy aura I've ever seen probably. And I don't, it's like your initial thought is like, oh, Trump would love him. But it's like, I don't know. Because Jax is also like such a worm. Like he's, he loves starting shit. He loves gossip, he loves, he lives for drama. But I think the important feature of Jax Taylor as a character and like, you know, Trump supplicant or equal is the thing that makes him an amazing character and actual real human being is that he triumphs in spite of all of his terrible failings and

shortcomings as a person. And he actually triumphs because of them for some weird reason. He just sort of admits, he thinks that admitting to all of his worst behavior and being like, yeah, I own it. I'm a bad person is the same thing as like apologizing for it or getting better. But it works for him. And so much that it kind of actually does make you a better person. If you're just like, yeah, I'm fucked up. I tell everyone, no, no, no, I lie. I cheat. I fucked them over. That's me. But it's like, it's true. And we still love you, Jax. And Trump has some of the same energy. Yeah. When Jax did the coolest, which made me a fan of Vanderpump rules when he did this, when he ratted out his best friend for, for cheating like years ago. And the guy was like,

I don't know why Jax would do this. He's my best friend. And Jax, in his interviews, like, yeah, friend is kind of a stretch. He's just so powerful. My favorite, my favorite Jax Taylor moment was, I forgot what season it is in, but he tries to slip a confession by his girlfriend by saying, like, he's like, Hey, baby, you remember when we talked about that time, that girl was in my hotel bathroom in Vegas for a little bit, but like nothing happened. And you were okay with that. You remember that, right? And she was like, no. And he was like, yeah, we talked about it. And you said you were okay with it. You remember that? It didn't work. But I just so appreciate like the audacity to try something like that. It's just a once, once in a lifetime type brain.

And I feel like him and Trump would initially get along. And then he would like, he would do something to Donald Trump. He would like tell Melania that Donald Trump chased around Stasi in his underwear or something. And he'd be like, yeah, we've never been friends. So maybe Jax is like the only way we can actually take down Donald Trump. Matt, do you have any celebs you'd like Trump to meet? I just think just from a poetic literary sense, it would be very fitting if in a sort of Nietzschean becoming what you have beheld staring into the abyss moment, Alec Baldwin, switch sides. And just he spent so much time being Trump that he just he becomes radically empathetic to him and then decides that he's actually good and right and smart.

And everyone is being too unfair to him. Talk about circling back to being bimbo five. Okay, next next question. Hey, chat about your house. First time in a long time, this is Connor from Chicago, Poland. I just wanted to get Matt's thoughts on the industry north this season. All right, thanks. I'll take my answer up there. Matt, your thoughts on the NFC north this season? I don't know. I haven't really been paying attention to football for a while because it's it's bad. The way they disrespect the flag is disgusting. Because football is a fash. No, no, it's because the packers suck. So why would I care? They're bad and they're gonna know who's gonna make it. Who's gonna win the NFC north bears? Maybe Vikings. I see the Vikings.

What difference does it make? They're all probably going to get destroyed by the rams of all teams hilariously. They're very good. The official team of Blue Lives Matter. Yeah. All right, this one. Let's try this one on. Hi, Choppo. I noticed you sometimes treat the so-called identity politics wing of the left with suspicion. Do you guys think the goals of the economic justice left and identity politics left are in conflict and how do you try to transcend your biases as a group of mostly white men? I'm including Amber in this since it seems like her views on gender politics are unorthodox. Well, Amber's not here to answer your questions, sir. So I cannot speak for her, but I will try to speak for myself. This is a semi serious question.

I think it's one that we get fairly frequently. Not unfairly, I don't think. I would say that, like, I think we've been pretty clear on the show that whatever the political goals of, shall we say, a class or material or economics based left and one focused on things like race or gender or quote unquote identity politics issues are not inherently intention with one another, but they are certainly pitted against one another by shitty neoliberal hacks and politics and people trying who don't have a good faith investment in the success of the left in this country. Right. I think this is often like a false dichotomy because they go, well, your choice is either like it's a New Deal Democrat or it's a shitty Democrat who makes some sort of like

gesture towards identity politics while not actually doing anything or offering anything. And in fact, is in direct conflict with their 90% of their political history. And so, yeah, I refuse to accept that as a choice. It's not an either or. Identity politics, as you know, is a term that defined as something you don't like, much like the term neoliberal also means a thing you don't like. You see something you don't like and you say, that is identity politics to me. In that regard, frankly, I think that it's largely a waste of time to invade against identity politics. And what usually when people on the left are getting what people on the left are getting in a fit about identity politics, usually they are

referring to some kind of weird internet distortion that is not a coherent political platform or philosophy. It's just a manifestation of the illness that, in fact, impacts your brain when you're on the internet, the illness that we all share and launder to you, the listener, every week on this fine program. Yeah, I'd say that's a good answer. Do not, yeah, do not confuse stuff you don't like on the internet with any coherent ideology. It's like, maybe you just don't like the posts. That's always possible. Yeah, but once at the same time, I think we should be critical when one can't help but notice when things like, for instance, forgiving all student loan will only help rich white people or something like that.

Or when these supposed values of representation or things like that are being used in a cynical way of which the end result of it is just like, what do you actually want? Just representation? The Sheryl Sandberg. Yeah, all of these things are not meaningful without actual political power or vision behind them. These empty signifiers through which I think, quite frankly, shitty and dishonest politicians launder their immorality and, quite frankly, capitalist politics. We've got a pretty good example of that in this little chamber drama about Nancy Pelosi, which all of this is bullshit. She's just going to end up being the speaker, and this was all for naught, when the immediate response that I saw from a friend

of the show, Joan Walsh, was to say that it was a committee of nine white men trying to dethrone the speaker and waiting. And obviously, you know, that's cynical and that's bullshit and there's very good reasons to be critical of Nancy Pelosi, even if those individuals, the ones who were posed Pelosi, were coming from the right. As to the listener's final question about how do we feel as a group of mostly white men responding to this, I think at the end of the day, is you have to be aware of your own biases and the things you bring to certain positions because of your own life experience and race and gender and class position within society. But genuinely, I don't take it too much into consideration nor do I think it's something that has to be

constantly wrestled or addressed with on the show because at the end of the day, we're just talking, we're just friends, this is just our point of view. So like, I mean, why do I need to constantly adulterate that or, you know, qualify everything you say based on who you are, I think is a little bit silly. If I could venture a quick and dirty definition of identity politics, it's just a mode of political organizing centered around identity, whether that's race, nationality, disability status, gender identity, sexual identity, things of that nature. And that's not something I oppose. And I find it very difficult to oppose that or say that that is essentially opposed in opposition to the grander plan of a racing class in society. And especially when these are still groups that

are marginalized in society. And you might say, you know, okay, well, that's, you know, that's just palliative, that's just treating a symptom. Symptoms are still things I'd like to see treated. I don't really agree with that, honestly. I think that you can make a universal pitch and make an argument that a lot of the underlying problems that come from specific identity-based approaches to politics could be solved using universal programs and, you know, the abolition of capitalism. But that's different from the mode of what it actually is in the world. And what it does is it creates these, it creates these currents that by definition can't come together. But they can, but they can't because the people within a specific current are operating

from the the premise of their the the group that they want to represent. And that is going to mean that when it comes to creating policies, when it comes to figuring out what is going to be done, that it's all these guys, these these different groups come into competition with each other. And that defeats universality. I don't think it necessarily has to. And I don't believe that this mode of organizing is necessarily exclusionary. And without getting too far into it, I know there are examples from the past that show it isn't. Whether it's in creating large labor unions consisting of people very different race cultural backgrounds, or I don't know, Jesse Jackson's Rainbow Coalition, or the way they organize laborers in, say, Hawaii, where you had individuals

siloed off, they came from different countries, different ethnicities, they could organize along ethnic lines. But in a federation, that one concessions. Well, yeah, of course, I'm just warning that that the people who are who are going to undermine broad based class politics are not just cynical politicians or journalists. They're also people who very well meaning, perhaps, but are are essentially concerned more with questions of representation than they actually do care about the broader question of the allocation of resources. And that is going to be a thing that's very difficult to counteract. Because how do you do it without appearing to be inconsiderate and insensitive to the real injustices that the groups have endured? And that's a

challenge that I don't know the answer to, but it's a tension that I think has to be acknowledged. And saying that universal programs and the universal and labor based politics sort of is and can be something that helps every group. That's true. But that doesn't abrogate the fact that in practice, this is a significant challenge to the building of that movement. I think that's an interesting debate. As you can tell, we've not fully resolved these questions for ourselves. We'll do it before in the premium episode. So we're not going to do it now. So let's move on. We've got to get to these questions. Let's keep them moving. Hi, I was just wondering if I could get a Catherine Krueger's email. Thank you. Yeah, I'll take my answer after the

interview. Here is what you can get, sir. Sir, what you can get is a vigorous correction, you absolute imbecile and duller. Catherine Krueger, you idiot. You just saw the Friday, the fucking Nightmare on Elm Street movies and you think it's Krueger. It's pronounced Krieger, dunce, blocked, reported. You're done. You blew it. Yeah, he blew a shot. You blew it. Shut the fuck up. He is never joining the Polycule. It's Virgil, Texas. Shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up. Edit that out. Bleep that, bleep that. All right. I got you, Will and Kath. Next question. Hi, Chappell. If you could choose one movie that you thought summed up the philosophy and experience of Chappell,

Chappell, what would you say it is? Also, I love Marty and all of the Chappell cats. Thank you. Easy, Garbage Pale Kill. Garbage, fuck the Garbage Pale Kids film. For me, this is an interesting one because it's an opportunity to do a plug. For the film screening event we're doing at Lincoln Center on December 10th, we will be at the Lincoln Center Film Society is hosting us as we introduce and then do a discussion after the 1997 classic, Starship Troopers, directed by Paul Verhoeven. A film and director, really a director that I think probably best captures the Chappell mindset. Absolutely. Of which Starship Troopers is but one facet. But you can go basically all of his American films, Robocop, Total Recall, Basic Instinct,

Showgirls, but definitely, definitely Starship Troopers. And I say that because Verhoeven is a director who more than almost anyone else has shown what the power of irony can do in even big budget Hollywood blockbuster filmmaking. And that he does these mega big budget studio movies, a run of them in the 80s and 90s, that were hits and made within the studio system that essentially had a kind of dual meaning. And that they were incredibly fun, gory, nasty, shoot-em-up action movies and sort of sex thrillers that all at the same time were deeply subversive in each in their own ways about how just sort of cheap, crass, and awful, and fascist American culture is. And he has a way of underscoring with brutal violence, like over-the-top brutal violence,

the kind of cheapness and grotesquery of human life. Now I want to note that's at the Lincoln Center on December 10th. And if you don't want to hear the panel discussion, you can just come and watch the movie and then leave. It's a movie theater. You can get popcorn concessions, things like that. Also, if you just want a place to sit, you know, you could just get a ticket and sit in the theater. That's totally fine. Use the restroom. It's right there. But what I mean with Starship Troopers and the irony thing is that he really shows that the best way to critique or subvert a right-wing point of view is to adopt it wholeheartedly, but take it to its most ridiculous extreme. It's much more effective. And this goes for chuds on the internet or Robert Heinlein,

the author. The best way to make fun of their point of their worldview or argue with them is to agree with them, but agree with them in a ridiculous way. And to show the logical conclusion of their beliefs, which is a really good society that we all want to live in, one that captures the brain bug. One movie, I think, I have two. Okay, let's lay it on us. One movie that I think, like, expertly detailed and sort of predicted a rise of a type of person, like a very underrated movie when it came out. 2009's Observe and Report. Oh, yeah. That's a good, like, proto-alright authoritarian, yeah, very dark movie. But yeah, no, I think that sums up, like, a type of guy

that we talk about quite a bit. Just somebody fuming in the dead, like, soul-crushing exerbs, just living amongst, like, the cheesecake factories and just getting pissed. And there's another movie that very bravely, very directly confronts the issue of imperialism and actually glorifies those who rise up against the U.S. military. And their bloodthirsty pursuit of resources. It creates a magical world that makes us fall in love, even teaches us a new language. Even some say it teaches us a new standard of beauty. It was so powerful that people wanted to kill themselves to live in this world. I'm speaking of James Cameron's Avatar. I would say it's the eternal sunshine of the spotless

mind, because essentially what our show is, is a struggle for affirmation and memory against the desire to forget. Also, critical film, critical film in the hot couch genre. This is the only movie to successfully portray the camping trip that hot couch guys actually do up and up going on, A Field in England by Ben Wheatley. A Field in England is an amazing movie. It's, I fucking love that movie so much. All of Ben Wheatley's films. Ben Wheatley's a guy. Are Chappell confirmed, stamped and approved. Absolutely. Yeah. If you want to, I mean, if I was going to pick a Wheatley for Chappell, I would say maybe Sightseers. Just another of a guy being totally talentless, but convinced of his own genius and taking it

out on everyone else. And eventually he turns violent. Yeah. But no, I think of one movie only, and it's a movie that asks you one simple question. Do you take the red pill or the blue that's right motherfucking matrix? Yeah, we thought I thought it was censored the film by Mike Cernovich. All you guys out there, you know, you think you're alone, but you've followed the white rabbit and you are exactly like Neil from the matrix. All right, let's go to the next question. Hey, Chappell, this is Al from Dorsetown to our first time long time. Yeah, I just wanted to ask you guys, what is the difference in your hatred levels between the worst Democrats say like Chuck Schumer and the quote unquote best Republican,

maybe Lisa Murkowski type? I'll take my answer off there. Thanks. Go Eagles. What is it? Go Eagles? Yeah. Okay. Clearly a violent individual. This is a very good question, though. I fuck. I just remembered a movie I forgot. Okay, get to the movie. Dead Presidents. Just see that one. It's a great fucking movie. Hughes Brothers classic classic. Okay, this. Okay, this back to the question at hand. This is a good question. What is the difference in our hatred and disgust for the worst Democrat versus quote unquote the best Republican? Is there any difference at all? Or do you actually hate Chuck Schumer more because he's ostensibly supposed to represent something better than

what the Republican Party stands for? It's hard because it's really hard to draw a distinction between someone like Murkowski and Schumer. No, I mean, if you want to say the worst Democrat, probably Manchin, who I would probably consider worse than Murkowski, because at least Murkowski is, you know, she's not Jim Jeffords exactly, but she's somewhere in there. I mean, she voted against Kavanaugh, which of course Manchin voted for enthusiastically. But what about like a like Chuck Schumer, who's like, I guess like if you've lined him up on policies is like more liberal than Joe Manchin is because he's from New York. But like his actual influence on our government and politics, I would say is worse. I mean, I don't really, here's the thing. I don't really think

he is an effective minority leader. I don't really think it's easy for someone to impress their will upon this caucus. Harry Reid did it very well. I don't know if Harry Reid is that substantially different in terms of his political positions than Chuck Schumer. Frankly, I think he's just sort of a figurehead at this caucus that mostly does what it wants. Yeah. And you know, the final thought on this is like, you know, imagine a really stupid guy who thinks minority leader is just the title you give to the most powerful Jew in America. And that's what I think. Matt, what do you, what do you think about this? And I really hate them all. I mean, that's really the answer. What is my personal feeling,

like my emotional response to one of these people? What does it matter? It doesn't. So it's just, I don't have to regulate it or modulate it. It's just visceral and I see them and I hate them. And it's sort of like, like how many angels can dance on the head of a pin? Like how much do you more do you hate Lisa Murkowski than Chuck Schumer or vice versa? This is pretty futile. This is doing a hot or not on fucking Deb Fisher and Lisa Murkowski. Why are we, what are we doing? We all know that, uh, that the hottest guy in the Senate is motherfucking Chuck Schumer, just a fucking Pog and a dime. I actually have a strong feeling on this one. I think that you got to hate the bad Dems more because basically everyone with an R behind their name, you can

just write off as the enemy, no matter how reactionary they are somewhat or very, uh, just loyal foot foot soldiers to like transferring capital to the richest assholes ever. The bad Dems, we all have to like, because of American electoral politics live in this big tent with these people and they are the ones who are just, uh, you know, making real, uh, effective, um, you know, a counterparty hard and impossible and having to do all the shit that you referenced earlier with the two step with Pelosi and the right wing Dems in the house and all that bullshit. And that is so much more of an impediment to, to a clear path forward for, uh, uh, progressive ideas that I find it immediately viscerally much more detestable than the, uh, quote unquote,

good R's who we all know are also just bad as well. Yeah. I sort of feel that when, like the same way, when it comes to pundits, like, like really awful right wing pundits, I enjoy more than just like the Craven supercilious lib pundits who are also in their own ways, very nasty. Like they revolt me more than, uh, than the right wing chuds to a certain degree. They at least pretend to be human. I think, I think our calculus though for pundits is different because I think, I think if you're just a person who sees these people here and there, you're obviously going to hate the right wingers more. And I think that's the more rational response. If you were just a regular consumer of media, because their views are

more upfront monstrous. But if you have to look at these people constantly, I think, it's, uh, remember what Tom Berenger says in Sniper? Of course. That he assigns these stories to people's lives that he watches through the scope because it sort of eases the doldrums of, uh, being a sniper, which is what we are. And I think that if you read this long enough, the liberals, they just, they kind of have all the same lives and internal monologues and it's all very dull. But, you know, someone like, there is more madcap comedy and human error and buffoonishness in the lives of conservatives and that you end up, you end up knowing more about them as people and you find them obviously worse in belief, but more interesting.

If you could like go into the heads of liberal pundits and hear their inner monologue, it's just fucking, you know, West Wing quotes and just big speeches. It's not even that. If you go into the inner minds of conservative pundits, it's just jug band music, just an endless hootenanny. Yeah. No, the liberal, you go into any liberal columnists, we don't like go into their head and it's like, huh, is it a pancotidian type of day? And you go into the conservatives head, it's like, oh God, is there any porn where a woman gets stuck in a barrel? It's like, whoa, how did this guy get like this? I know how the liberal got like that. It's, you know, it would have been me if I was a better student. Well, there's an exception. I think I generally agree with that.

Like guy like Rod, I mean, yeah, his brain is just filled with galaxies that you want to explore. It's a no man's. Rod is the seventh doctor. Yeah. But there's one conservative pundit who is just as empty and blank and uninteresting as the liberal and yet million times more risible and therefore I hate way more than any of them. And he reminded me today of why I do because as you might know, the US border patrol fired a bunch of tear gas at men, women and children trying to get into the country in Tijuana today. And a lot of Democrats and liberals got mad and said, this is awful. And a lot of Republicans and conservatives fell all over themselves to say, it's not a big deal. One of whom who posted a picture of some US troops being exposed to

tear gas as part of their boot camp said, what's the big deal that this happens to our troops all the time? They do. They volunteer for it. It's not a war crime. That of course being John Paderis, a man who will call the cops if his seamless delivery of burger does not come with a little shot glass of fucking pan drippings that he asked for this disgusting pig this hog scum this this ball of entitlement who just just just throbs and expands like a tumor of privilege and unearned position in society who's never had any fucking adversity in his life more than like somebody at a cocktail party looking at their watch when he tried to talk to them is going to tell a bunch of people who traveled up 1500 miles to avoid getting murdered by a drug

gang and then got gassed by his our government to fucking walk it off. I'm imagining stuffing John Podhoritz in like a wardrobe with a fucking pulled pin on a tear gas canister and padlocking it. John Podhoritz's punishment in hell should be he gets all the treats that his he could ever desire. He's eternally hungry for them. Whenever he bites into one, just tear gas comes out. I mean he's tweeting about it but no one responds. I mean I think that's why I get happier when I see we're doing like John Podhoritz is a great example because it's like yeah if it's a shitty liberal right like their their entire lives are this study of sort of public relations dark magic and shit and they won't reveal that much if it's funny about themselves or they know they know exactly how

to portray themselves but the conservatives are so like they they're sheltered and encouraged in this way that they just put it all out there like no one is telling John Podhoritz like you literally you sound like a gustus gloop you sound like a more tyrannical version of a gustus gloop stop it stop adding schnippers likes to look foolish and so I think that they're because I think they were told no fewer times that I get to see more of who they are and it's more exciting I think Matt's on is something because if I if we're talking about planets my hate level is absolutely the highest for the never trump conservatives no question yeah hundred percent no one they embody the worst of both worlds definitely oh yeah no they absolutely they're

just the couple they are the one their their base their base cowardice is is revolting because that's the defining characteristic of their entire lives is cowardice so I think that's a good way to end this question you know hate whoever you want you know just let it let it let it just throw it all out there but reserve the special the captain's reserve for never trump conservatives that high proof shit because they are the worst of the worst who all of the shit that went down in Tijuana every single one of them oh yeah okay next question hello it's jesse the voicemailer i'm wondering who has the wild conspiracy theory of all the chappos and who what the biggest fight between you over one of these theories has been

interesting okay so like I interpret that question are are are there any conspiracy theories or something that in sort of our popular consciousness can be described as a conspiracy theory that you actually believe in uh i got a couple uh pretty sure that the fbi killed martin there's a king oh yeah and also i'm like 90 percent of pizza gate is real like everything but sort of the specifics that these people freak out about like comic ping pong and all the dumb emails that they decipher the the premise of pizza gate is correct which is that the elite traffic and ritually abuse children as a part of uh like solidifying their bonds as part of the elite and as a way to sort of leverage one another to prevent them from breaking ranks but like

john pedestas specifically no not necessarily he is a weirdo though and it wouldn't surprise me i mean nothing that pretzegate has covered uncovered as terms of like evidence is real but they fuck they fuck people they fuck i mean epstein my god the guy who has both the the the the former president and wife of the 2016 democratic candidate and the 2016 republican candidate both were on the flight logs of his sex uh ship that went to his private sex island where we know for a fact they were abusing children like what why would we think that it would end there why wouldn't we think that that if you looked at the flight logs of say well something like warren buffett over a 20 year period i'm pretty sure it would be every member of the political class as well

yeah but okay if there are they going to the sex island because that's i think the most important question there they're going to a underage sex island no they're going to the the underage sex omaha steakhouse um i am yeah no just google franklin credit ring uh i'm down with that one and uh i mean i don't i don't think you can even call this conspiracy anymore the cia actually absolutely fucking sold cocaine in america in the 1980s yeah i would say that's hardly 100% 100% uh i yeah i think that um i would if i were a betting man i would say that the government killed melcom x using forces within no i uh i'm trying to go for a spicier one that i think is true beyond astrology is real uh which i also believe the greatest conspiracy of all yeah um

you know i think i i think i've done my i think i can't pinpoint exactly who killed jfk but i think the mafia were the trigger men like you got to go with that one probably i'm sort of more lukewarm on the jfk thing i think the most credible jfk jfk conspiracy theory is sketched out by don delillo in libra in that the cia was involved but what they wanted and they were using oswald as a patsy because he would you know lived in he defected to the soviet union he was a marxist he was like a hands-off cuba guy but the cia wanted to basically stage use him to stage an assassination attempt as an excuse to read to recommit to invading cuba after the bay of pigs disaster and they'd like you know to get back at kennedy for not you know sending in the air force they're

not fully committing to their plan for regime change in cuba that they wanted to stage like an assassination attempt by a known marxist uh you know acolyte or defender of fidel castrow who's an american citizen and then use that as a causus belly but it sort of got out of their hands and you know one of their trigger men was too good a shot or didn't get the memo but to echo matt the one i absolutely do believe is that james irwin was not even the shooter of martin luther king but was a pure patsy unlike oswald who i think definitely at the very least pulled the trigger from the book depository whether he was the only shooter i don't know i'm sort of like agnostic on that question but i find the delillo scenario more believable than the other ones if oswald

pulled off that shot that's the most poggers snipe of all time he was a marine using that marines suck too so much of a better shot than any marine and that's no that's no cap dude virginal do you have any uh conspiracy believe in no i don't i uh have normal beliefs and i don't really agree with my colleagues on these but i think that the quotidian evil and men's hearts and their machinations are sufficiently terrifying that i don't need any sort of conspiracy oh how about this guys imagine a vast conspiracy pulled over your eyes every single day but for kindness no more than that next question next question there was a second shooter of a smile please stop talking shit about pit bulls i'm gonna be honest okay okay uh please stop being violent i'd like

you to stop making fun of pit bulls they're actually really sweet it's the owners that are bad two calls about pit bulls i'm gonna be honest man all the stuff about pit bulls we're really just like making fun of the people whose only political issues the demonization of pit bulls they are very nice dog dogs as you know adam friedland adam friedland's dog icy is just the sweetest pit bull okay yeah normally at it we you know it's always a bad move to explain jokes but i wouldn't want people actually thinking that we're anti pit no we're not pit bulls are wonderful sweet dogs as felix said adam friedland's dog icy is like she's like a a lap dog in a big dog's body you just sit down and she just tries to curl up in your lap even though she weighs about 50 pounds and

they're darling and yes it is the people who make pit bulls bad however pit bulls as a species are basically engineered to have the potential to be um remorseless child eating and killing machines so i'm just saying just stay on alert stand your ground and if a pit bull is looking menacing at all uh put it down with a crossbow i mean 100 yard rule i prefer i prefer the more exotic dogs like a borzoi a portuguese lady da well yeah no i think it's cool when dogs have jobs and they look cool a pit bull's job is just annihilating murder it's like robo cop that's why you guys like it no they're they're sweethearts they're just i mean the real problem with pit bulls most of them you meet is that they like you too much and they don't realize how strong they are and they just

get all over you and they kill you no they're wonderful i love them okay we dispense to that controversy okay next question hey chapos this is uh this is the president of china jijian ping i just wanted to thank you guys personally for your continued work to destroy the youth of america uh and prepare the u.s as a whole for the chinese invasion of the west coast which should be kicking off in the next three months we're really excited for that we want to help i want to get you guys helping in this in this cause we've gone ahead and we sent the uh a crate full of type 56 a case to the park salt mansion hope you guys have fun with that anyway i gotta run uh thanks thanks again and along with socialism with the chinese characteristics

wow what a nice guy dude i've always said he's this sweet he's a sweetheart he's like a pit bull he's like unfairly demonized he is the great helmsman of my heart i love him all right dude it's good i mean you never know what will happen when you do something like open up a voicemail box that anyone can call sometimes it may be the leader of china calling in to congratulate you on all the good work you're doing and i i say to him to president g buddy we can smoke weed anytime you find yourself in brooklyn yeah we hold your thought all the way talk about a pep talk president president g i would love to smoke some weed with kush characteristics with you hell yeah i can't wait to do an unboxing video on those choppers that's gonna fucking rule illegally china chinese

manufactured ak unboxing video president g if you can uh tactically ascertain for me my favorite gun from battlefield series the an 94 rifle a two-round burst that has no recoil in the second burst uh yeah i mean if you can't get it i understand you're a busy guy if you can awesome all right uh next question hey chopper this is josh i really like the stavros episode where he had that great speech about dumb socialists do you have uh any more advice for all us to dumb socialists out there thanks a lot uh number one of them is stay away from internet socialism uh of all kinds because honestly what you see there are people who have very specific views a lot of them frankly kind of just want to show everyone how smart they are and have a mania

for basically creating litmus tests because they view the left as a subculture they're they're basically goths for politics and they don't like posers and as a result they really aren't interested in getting any kind of mass movement so ignore those insane sane people and just try to stick to meet space organizing with people because if you're dealing i find in my experiences so when people are dealing with you know actual questions of what do we do like actual activism a lot of these very uh sort of innovating theory questions sort of fall by the wayside and people have regardless of how much education they have they have some practical insights to contribute and they can collaborate on on a way forward to echo what matt said i think by 2018 now having been extremely

online and associated with the left for a few years now i would say basically anyone who's online and seems to really really care about or identify with a specific left-wing tendency and wants you to do the same or do otherwise based on who you are uh should pretty much be written off i think they're all cranks and weirdos and should pretty much be ignored but for the larger question i think you just shouldn't afraid of uh just uh being stupid or not being stupid or just not you know rob wiseman had a really great infographic he did about this very question about being a dumb guy that was just like basically laid out have i read the tax code no neither have you but guess what rich people should still pay more of it like you know like i could i could i explain

to you how single-payer works no but if you get sick uh you shouldn't be bankrupted by it or like you know that that should be provided for you but it should be a basic standard of decency and care in a rich society you don't need to be a wonk or a fucking genius or someone who is like you know raised a million posts yeah exactly or the type of kid who you know brought a briefcase to school and wanted to be a wonk and likes to be like well you don't really know what you're talking about where are the details where are the graphs to understand basic moral and political truths that are self-evident to anyone with half a functioning brain and more importantly than taking that belief and putting it to practical use all right pretty good answer next question

hey what's up just wanted to say uh i don't know you guys are really cool and it's also it's kind of neat to like have like funny interesting people who like aren't transphobic it's a really rare thing and you guys have been that from day one so good on you really more of a comment than a question i wish you'd made that um more clear starting out no i'm just kidding thank you very much for the kind thoughts we did get a lot of just general notes of encouragement from listeners such as you and while playing them all would seem self-indulgent i do want to thank you for calling in and saying that uh you like to show and you think we're cool and funny okay next question the notion that socialism has not existed in the west is a lie the francis

perkins back 1935 national labor relations act title 29 chapter 7 sub chapter 2 now this code is literally socialism and the corporation excise tax act has a labor organization in section 501c3 and 501c5 of the us tax code and have these features an association of workers who have combined to protect or promote the interests of the members by bargaining collectively with their employers to secure better working conditions wages and similar benefits those bullet points appear socialism socialism exists in title and action within the us and bolsters the country and should be a part of the us civics education thanks man you demand that was that was a good question i mean i agree i agree with i agree with what that person just

said let's just go to uh the next one though the francis perkins back 1935 national labor relation relations act titled 29 chapter 7 sub chapter 2 united state code is literally socialism and the corporation excise tax act has a labor organization in section 501c3 501c5 of the us tax code and have these features association of workers who have combined to protect or promote the interests of the members by bargaining collectively with their employees to secure better working conditions wages and similar benefits that appear socialism it's existed in title and action in the us and bolsters this country it should be taught in the us civics civics please that's amazing two guys wow very similar things to say i i joined his call in teaching that us civics first of all he's wrong

that's not socialism that's a union that's not the same thing the the the it's the owner he said they're said the owners are a separate class from the employees that's not socialism i think that no i think that guy's right it's socialism when the owners have actual control of the the company not when they bargain with the ownership i just want to say thanks for your kind words we do have fun doing the show to answer your question can i uh respond to him with um michael's replies to bodybuilder likes in real life sure instagram damn you're thicker than a steven king book i'd love for you to knock me out with a good slap to the head you look like some fucking hawaiian rolls man completely freaking osum totally great look like real life baywanch

it's so good michael's the best uh i've i've i've another one uh this is sort of a uh i think uh like a nice thoughts call but i i want to play it because it has a sort of an international flavor hey everyone this is one of the hugs i'm a big fan from morocco and i just wanted to squeal about if you could have any more cool international gifts because we have not had those in a while in your america center thank you i'm sorry did he say he was from monaco or morocco morocco oh that makes more sense he's he's a prince he's like a guy who does intrigue with james bond he's a high stakes gambler or a formula one race card i'm calling you for the bachara table chapeau i have one of the right i'm the head of monaco's communist party

there's one of us and i'm glad he he said that because i can now announce that we are going to have a uh it was going to be a surprise but i'm going to tell it a jair balson arrow we're having him next week he's going to be in the studio we're very excited all my favorite fighters support him uh he's he's the man uh i had plenty of great foreign guests a china mievel again always and to me heartening and somewhat shocking to find out we have listeners in a place like morocco but uh super cool and uh again if you have good ideas for international guests um send them to the voicemail yeah we'll try to have uh you know maybe we'll do like a a mod like a trip around the globe episode where we read you facts from an almanac

and teach you some things about the world uh no but seriously uh more international guests would be great and uh love hearing from fans um all over the world yeah uh and to that listener you know pour back a cup of that berber whiskey for us and uh anyone but uh europeans i'm down to have on anyone but that hideous hideous continent all right and one final one let's see what this is hey choppo this is the gray wolf indicator illinois i just want to let you know that i threw that thanks to your show i threw my college degree in the trash and became a freight train conductor here uh so you have that going and it's something that will make me laugh for the rest of my life so uh congrats and just let you know the gray wolves are infiltrating the freight

rail yeah bye the cater that is it's a place i haven't thought of in a while but we need those amtrak and metro metro and metro conductors you know in oi thank you i just think that sums it up if you're listening to the show uh drop out of college if you haven't done so ready throw that degree in the trash and become a train conductor it's easy you just see one of them going by and you run you know you run pick up some speed and you hop on you work your way up yep you got a cool hat we're looking into changing the rules uh where you can only become a train conductor if you kill the previous one we think that's a high barrier to entry some of those guys are pretty good at fighting remember they killed the last one to get in that position and they've presumably killed all

their challengers so we will be looking to change that the one downside of being a conductor is that eventually you will meet joe biden it's just inevitable or john casick oh god well if you meet joe biden you'll probably be serving him a drink on the dining car if you meet john casick you'll be stoving his head in with a real high as you toss him out of a boxcar going over a covered going over a bridge that connects two parts of a mountain yes um that about does it for the pre-recorded call-in show uh i will leave you with this the one final call that sums it all up we'd like to do some more of these uh pre-recorded call-ins um keep that number in mind uh the voicemail box is up in perpetuity so uh drop by and give us a piece of your mind especially if

you're angry at us oh one last thing so you can't pronounce it can't get mad at us it is jay you're bolson arrow hard j i don't i said that i said that i know i know i think in case they try to correct you oh yeah because they're stupid pigs i'm i'm just you can easily say that way i'm i'm actually a lot more looking forward to uh your your your phrase pan quotidian oh yeah that's that was pretty good yeah i'm a pan quotidian type of brother all right guys uh till next time yeah bye oh i

You bought a guitar to punish your mom You didn't like school And you know you know what it was So long ago You're the king